#I'm so thankful they got a fucking killer final design for him in the end

[king-crawler]

hello!! i found another fucked up candybug design but this time in a coloring book!!! :•]

he seems to look like a in-between the beta and the pin design and is smaller [i think] which is very interesting

anyway found this from this ye old post from 2012

OH MAN. No its definitely true that they make tons of merch before the movie is even done LOL

[boozles]

QL Grievances 2024 Part Two: The Bad Stuff

So, I posted the Good Stuff that I liked earlier, now it's time for tthe Bad Stuff. However, I would like to preface this by saying that these are just my opinions, okay? If you see me disliking something that you loved, it isn't an attack on you - we're all pals here <3

The Most Ableist Ending Ever: Last Twilight

This was such a fantastic series and really made me enjoy JimmySea...but then they just went and ruined all the growth and progression by returning Day's sight. I totally get it was meant to be a happy ending etc. but it was so unrealistic and rather classist as well as ableist. It was such a disappointment, and every time I see the show win an award I can't help but feel like it doesn't completely deserve it.

Biggest Let Down Of An Ending: The Sign

I was OBSESSED with this show as it was airing. I loved it so much, but then the last episode just phoned it in. After a lifetime of stalking Tharn, the Doc just let's him go a year later? There was also not nearly enough scenes with the Nagas. I am thankful that this series brought us BillyBabe, and it was a fantastic show up until the finale.

Worst (Fake) Tattoos In A Seres: Kant, The Heart Killers

You have absolutely no idea how much I hate these tattoos. Okay, I'm not a tattoo experct, but I have been getting tattoos for 20+ years now and I have a pretty decent collection on my body. Kant's tattoos are startingly fake, and putting him in scenes with actors who actually have tattoos makes them look worse. You can see the shine of the transfer, you can see it rubbing off in places, and you can even see the sticky edges. IT'S HORRIBLE. It makes me so sad because First looks amazing in the series but I keep wishing he was in long sleeves because every time I look at those tattoos I get irrationally angry. Like, why are they so bad? Look at Win from Between Us - his tattoos look great! And even Joke from Jack and Joker's look pretty decent (albeit a little I Got These From A Lucky Bag). AND THEN THERE'S THE DESIGNS THEY'VE PICKED. Like, the blocked lines that don't wrap around the limb - WHY? And they all look so similar? Like, was there a sale on transfer packs? The only one that looks half decent is the one on his back. I'm sorry, but I just. I just HATE them so much. So. Fucking. Much.

Worst Change To An Existing Character: Pai, Cherry Magic

Don't get me wrong, I love Pai and her fangirling ways, but I really wish they had kept her asexual. Or, at the very least, single; like, the point of her character (to me, anyway) always felt like it was her discovering she's fine on her own, she's a strong, independant woman. It would also have been good to just see someone enjoying their life and not needing romance. (Which, I guess she kinda had a little of, since it was Rock that pursued her and she was a bit nonchalant for most of it.)

Worst Acting In A Series: Dead Friend Forever

I had to quit the series half way through because the acting was just so bad. Okay, Ta, Barcode and Copper were fantastic, but everyone else was awful. The writing was pretty awful, too. Like, the premise was promising, and it would have made a great horror movie, but the series was too long and too bad. (I will say, however, Fuaiz and JJay really showed up for 4 Minutes and did so much better in that.)

Worst Adaption Of An Already Existing Series: Love in the Air: Koi no Yokan

Another series I had to drop because I was just not vibing. I'm supportive of the series existing but it was just not for me. The casting all feels wrong (other than Arashi, who was great), and having the story so condensed down felt wasted. Fuma and Kai just felt super weird and did not fit the characters, I don't think? LITA (Thai) wasn't perfect at all, but it most definitely is the superior series.

Worst Acceptance Of A Character's Bad Actions: Perfect 10 Liners

So, I am obsessed with this show but I am still pretty mad how everyone just kinda accepted that Arc was a racerboy and endangered lives? Like, the way it was all, "you hurt Arm, do you care now?" and like, it only took hurting someone in their group for Arc to stop speeding? That rubbed me the wrong way. Like, I know his friends kinda called him out, but they were also the ones who were like OH CAN YOU GIVE ARM A RIDE HOME (in the first episode) even though they knew what Arc was like.

And that's all from me for now! I actually feel like I complain too much, and again, all of this is just my thoughts and whinings; no hate to shows/characters/actors/creators!

[kid-karoshi]

Death has no escape - Final Chapter

...Together, they hurried up the cellar stairs and sought shelter behind the house by a massive rock. Claudette began to do something to stop the bleeding. Ash had crouched down beside her. "Wait, you don't have to do this yourself. Let me help you." He hummed and tended to the wound extremely meticulously with the resources at hand. Until, in the last moment, he conjured up out of his back pocket another band-aid. He presented it like a trophy in front of her nose. This one was pink and had a thick print of a stupid looking bumblebee on it. At least this one seemed significantly fresher than the one he had given to Dwight. Responding to the questioning look, he gave a blunt attempt at flirtation, "There's more where that came from." Winking at her, already squeezing the tape tight. "Thanks for saving me, but wow...you could be my grandfather!" she snarked, leaning backwards while giving him a head-to-toe eye check. The grin fell off his face for a second upon that. "Ouch sweetie, I may have a bad knee, but I'm certainly not a grandpa. He gently placed his hand on hers and purred "Don't be sad, There was no future for us anyway." Claudette furrowed her forehead and withdrew her hand in disgust. "Come on sweetie, let's go save the others then."

art: @alexpdcl

They crept across the area in a crouched posture. Claudette grabbed his forearm after a while and pointed to a hill. "There." she whispered.

"Really? They're completely tired of living..." he hissed back at her. Dwight and Felix had chosen a generator on a hill as THE final workpiece. This one, however, was located not far from a mighty gate. "Okay little lady, you just run straight ahead and hide in the bushes over there, when the electric supply is up, your sweet ass will only worry about opening the gate, do we have an understanding?" Claudette was about to argue that she wasn't going to be talked to like that, but by that time Ash had already gained a few feet of ground. All she had left was an exhausted gasp. She froze in shock at the sound she heard afterwards. Right next to her, the air flickered and the gurgling monster passed her by. It was too late to tell those men what was happening.

"Hi girls, do you have a spot left for me?" fluttered Ash as he joined the others. The machine had already made good progress. There were still a few little things to do. "Busy." he grumbled with satisfaction. "Is Claudette all right?" enquired Dwight.

"Sure she is. I've got her patched up. She's fine and now let's get this done. At the end, I'll give each of you a piece of cake as a reward." Ash grinned broadly.

Dwight lifted his gaze, spied his girlfriend and tossed his arm from left to right very energetically but also extremely awkwardly. Claudette, on the other hand, frantically pointed in his direction, which he completely misunderstood, after that he pointed at Ash and with an outstretched thumb he responded to her. Then, without waiting for the next reaction, he quickly continued with the fixing. Felix, however, interrupted his work and spoke in a reproachful voice. "You arrogant son of a bitch, you knew that we were risking our asses out here while you were playing the hero. I know you for maybe ten minutes, but that's enough to see what a pathetic fraud you are, admit it, you're a chickenshit, you don't have a plan, you're just reacting to the circumstances around here! You may be able to fool the others but not me!" Dwight faintly looked back and forth between the two, convulsively trying not to provoke a short circuit. "Guys, uh, so I think you should discuss this later," he stammered. Ash, on the other hand, lowered his head and grumbled to the ground, "You seem to think you're a pretty big deal yourself. Do you think I chose to be the 'hero'? Evil always finds me, it is obsessed with me. There is nothing but death around me and that has been the reality for far too long. But what cheers me up anyway today is that your snooty life is also about to change," he chuckled darkly.

The chiming of the bell abruptly broke up their discussion. Dwight hopped to his feet and, with a cry of horror, he sprinted for the nearest shelter. As the ghostly figure revealed itself, the two men were still sitting at the machine, trying to crank it with their last ounce of strength. "Come on, come on, come on , damn it!" roared Felix "Get out of here!" screamed Ash at him, who also continued repairing. " Screw it! HHNGH!" groaned Felix as the killer's blade sped across his back, cutting the fibers of his designer suit, ripping open his flesh and severing some tendons of his scapula. At that moment, their eyes met. Ash snorted and lunged suddenly forward to knock Felix off the top of the hill and out of harm's way. As the killer, mesmerized detached the shredded skin from his blade, Ash sat right in front of him and plugged the last cable into the right connection. A shrilling sound was emitted and finally the exit gates had enough power to be opened. Claudette had taken position and immediately flipped the switch wich crackled electrifyingly. Dwight ran toward Felix and helped him up to drag him toward the exit gate. "NO! Ash is still up there!" he yelled painfully.

He was standing on top of the hill and noticed that the gate was already in the second phase, so it was going to burst open for the next few seconds. "Run, you fools!" he shouted. "... I've always wanted to say that, and now on to you, you ugly critter! Guess you think you're the greatest, huh?!" at this he bent his head back to stare brashly into the creature's face. The killer faced him with a growl, paused for a second, and to Ash's amazement, nodded in affirmation.

His eyes widened as he understood that he was now in serious trouble. He almost rolled himself over as he tried to make a run for it. At the same time, the exit gate sprang up with a loud clatter. His three teammates set out to leave this terror all behind. Beneath the great arches of the gate, Dwight and Claudette tried to heal the injured man, who was losing gallons of blood. Ash was running away " You better not let me find my shotgun...". That'll make you all get stale looking, you slowpoke! Then it's you who have to hide from ME! God have mercy on you, or whatever your kind is worshiping." He dragged the killer tauntingly behind him for a few more feet until he leapt through a boarded shack toward the exit. He turned his gaze to the others. At that very moment, his fate was sealed when his meniscus tore. And Ash knew it. *damn, not now the fucking knee!

The others screamed his name "Go!" He huffed as the enemy appeared behind him and cruelly struck him down with one hit. The wraith had gained in brutality and efficiency after the gate was opened, so it was practically impossible to avoid this curse. Felix felt terrible about the last words he had said to Ash. He wanted to undo everything he had said, but was dragged by his companions through the portal that prevented him from returning.

When Ash was picked up from the ground, badly injured, the pain seemed eerily familiar. After spending some time on his opponent's shoulder, he whispered in the killer's ear, "You could have just asked for my number, honey." who, visibly confused, dropped his victim right next to a hatch in the ground, from which a strange rumble and dark smoke rose. As the Killer was still reflecting on his feelings, the old man robbed himself into the dark abyss. Before he was closing the gate behind him, he raised his middle finger in the direction of the killer, who mournfully lowered his weapon.

Felix and the others, who had been running for quite a while, reached a campfire, at which they settled down. "We're safe here," Dwight said, and took Claudette in his arms. Felix flopped down and buried his fingers in his hair. Everyone was exhausted to the utmost and stared silently into the flames. The oppressive silence was accompanied by the crackling of the dry wood. Suddenly Felix recognized the outline of a figure looking through the flames.

"What are those long faces about?" interrupted Ash the melancholy. Three astonished pairs of eyes locked on the badly battered man, who magically pulled out a sugar-coated mess from his denim shirt.

"Look, there's no blood on that piece of cake," he sneered, before joining the others and shared it among the survivors.

[cavariously]

[Trying my hand at a fan fiction.

I love to write but I have never done anything like this before, so all feedback would be extremely appreciated (Grammer, Plot, Characters etc.).

I love Tokyo Ghoul so I really hope I don't fuck this up 😅. A big thank you to anyone who reads this ❤️]

Caution: Agressive Swearing, Offensive Language, Graphic Violence.

Notes: Takes place post end of TG:re, Reapers = Marshall version of Doves.

1. Crow - 24

City lights and the rushing motions of the landscape turn the 24th ward into a blinding and blaring circus. Humans. They crawl through this city with the assurance that they will be here tomorrow. They will be here a year from now. They will be here forever. They are the only lifeform with this assurance. All other creatures in this world live with the knowledge that their making it to the next moment is a fifty fifty

It is certainly a miracle that they last, noticing absolutely nothing at all. They don't see the effects that the fumes of their veichles have on the planet that they grip so tightly to. They can't begin to recognise that they are being continually watched and targeted by devices that could wipe them from the face of said Earth in less than zero. They don't even notice the apex predictor observing them from less than a mile above.

Humans simply move from one spot to another, only stopping to cause irrevocable disaster and reduce their surroundings to less than ash, and then move on to the next target. Someone said that humans are Parasites, and although it may be naive to believe this was wholly correct, it would be complete ignorance to dismiss it entirely. Ghouls do not indulge in such ignorance. Parasite is an apt description for a human, from the perspective of a ghoul, that and food.

The figure stands tall, wind rushing rapidly through their tied up hair. They can smell the putrescence of man-kind as they go about their sweaty and arrogant business. They would laugh if it wasn't so tragic. What do humans amount to? They are greedy and bloody bags of meat that fight and hate more than any other being, yet they are allowed to multiply and just be. It could be argued that ghouls are the same as humans in this aspect, but most abide by the one meal a month agreement, even though this arrangement can be hell for some. Unlike humans, who see violence as their God given right, when ghouls fight, it is rarely for anything other than survival. Perhaps this view doesn't take all ghouls into account, but all humans gorge themselves on everything, and fight for any fucking reason they want.

Twenty years ago, a disaster was meant to end this disparity. For the first time ever, ghouls and humans fought together to save the world they shared from the monster that had been designated 'DRAGON'. The defeating of this enemy was meant to end in equality, where ghouls and humans shared the world equally. Scientific leaps had been made. Synthetic meats that ghouls could eat, so they wouldn't have to harm humans. The corpse of Dragon even lead to dramatic advancements in the medical field. Humans were now benefiting from ghoul DNA, as it allowed them to combat most illnesses and increase their lifespan somewhat. After all that ghouls had done for them, weren't humans grateful? No. Ten years, then ghouls were back to being vile creatures to be hunted, and were forced back to living in the sewers. The deaths of so many perfectly good and innocent ghouls, just so that humanity could screw them all over again. What a funny tragedy.

Another figure appeared from the shadows, stepping in line with their comrade. Neither looking at the other, they both silently watched the ferris-wheel turn round and round. A world that they saw as rightfully theirs. They were hungry for it and they would have it. No matter the cost. In fact, the more human casualties... the better.

"Are you ready to go?" the newcomer asked, never taking their attention away from everything below.

"Yeah. Any longer and I might have to eat you."

"Like you could" came the cold, arrogant response.

"Just because you got five inches on me now, doesn't mean I can't still beat your ass Da..."

"Don't fucking call me that. While we're out here you call me Kuma and I call you... Blindfold, or Eyeless. Something like that." Even though his response had been quick and sharp, neither his tone nor his concentration had wavered.

"Eyeless" they conceded.

"Fine, Eyeless it is. Just don't go shouting our real names out in public. You're enough of a liability as it is without giving our fucking identities away."

Eyeless finally turned to look at their brother. They couldn't help feeling a pang of nostalgia. He had been so small once, constantly hanging onto their shoulders and making paper birds that he place all over their home. Those memories hurt, especially when they remembered what came after. He used to smile so much and now he's a moody little shit. They'd never been like that at fourteen, they thought smugly.

"Fine. Let's go KUMA before I rip your snarky head off." With that final retort, Eyeless turned and stepped off of the roof.

Kuma watched them drop six stories, landing with grace and poise. Why were they always so aggravating? Maybe he was jealous of their natural ability, or perhaps they were just a pain in the ass to be related to. With a sigh and a wandering look to the night sky, he followed suit.

* * *

The Marshalls finished up disposing of the ghoul. Bikakus are a pain in the ass Haruto thought, but it's better than a Ukaku. Haruto loved the fact that he was an intimidating figure. The ghoul had basically shat itself as soon as it had seen his large muscular frame, and cruel bearded face. The black trench coat they wore, that often announced the end for ghouls, probably didn't hurt either. He nudged the face of the corpse with his foot. He reckoned it wouldn't even be worth removing his Kakahou to get a new quinque. Taking into account the short amount of time it had taken him and Kenji to bypass his defences and cut him through the middle, he was a B rated ghoul maximum.

"Right, time we get back" Haruto sighed.

"Mhm" Kenji agreed. He never said much.

"Did you bring the body bag? You never know, you might be able to upgrade that piece of shit you call a quinque." Haruto laughed loudly. He loved taking the piss out of Kenji, especially when he knew his only retort woukd be 'mhm'.

As expected, Kenji responded with a grumbling "Mhm", and moved towards the body.

Haruto, turned to walk away, lighting a cigarette and beginning to inhale deeply. That Kenji was going to marry his sister. What's he gonna say when the priest asks him if he takes her to be his lawfully wedded wife? Mhm. Haruto chuckled to himself. All in all Kenji was a good guy, and one hell of a Marshall. He could use that crappy Ukaku quinque pretty damn well, even if it did come from a C rated ghoul. Kenji also took Haruto's kids to the beach when he and Mrs Haruto wanted a quiet weekend. He might be an ugly fucker with next to no hair, and a face that made you want to split him down the middle, but he was clean and sometimes smelt nice. Yeah, Kenji could marry his sister if he wanted. She could do a hell of a lot worse.

A loud splatter sounded out behind Haruto. He spun on his heels, instincts flaring immediately into action. Where the fuck was Kenji? Where his partner had been attempting to fit the ghoul into the black bag, there was now the cut in half corpse of his future brother in law, fallen to the sides with a blindfolded figure standing in the middle. His entire being twitched in anticipation of this thing making a move to kill him, but all it did was leasurly bend down and scoop something up from the gore beneath. As the creature straightened up, he saw that it was simply sucking on one of Kenji's bloody fingers. To others, this might signify a psychotic animal, but to a seasoned Marshall, this was a confident and calculating killer plain and simple. A powerful one at that. Their clothes were indistinctive; clad in thin black leather and fabric, however, their mask was a completely different story. Almost the entirety of its face was covered. Its mouth had a tight black fabric wrapped over it, with a skeletal smile that would open, revealing the snaking pink tongue underneath. The huge back leather collar surrounding it could be zipped up to hide all but the eyes from the world. Not that the eyes could be seen either. A bone white blindfold shut them off from view. Foreign symbols were drawn in deep black on either side, with the a closed eye taking centre stage. Although it was just a drawing, that closed eye was unearving, as if the lack of sight heightened its ability to see, instead of impeding it.

Now this was a ghoul. Just by its sheer presence Haruto could tell this one was rated A, or more likely >S. Haruto couldn't deny to himself that he was intimidated, but he was a senior Marshall, and always backed himself in a one on one. He looked down at his fallen partner and gulped. First things first, get into this guys head. Haruto scanned the ghoul, looking for weaknesses that he could exploit verbally. If he was lucky, the reaction could lead to him obtaining an edge. He noticed that this ghoul was slight in stature, maybe five foot five all told.

"You wanna end up like this other piece of shit, you fucking dwarf."

This garnered absolutely nothing.

Haruto couldn't take it much longer. This creature continued to lapp at the guts of his dead partner, that were splattered over its fingers. It obviously didn't give a shit what it looked like to others. It reminded him of a cat, publically cleaning its fur and genitals with no concern for the world. It was fucking reveling in its feast, and it made Haruto's blood boil.

"You killed an innocent man. He was gonna have a family and you ripped him apart. You monsters have no fucking souls and you all belong in hell. That's where I'm gonna send you. I'm a fucking senior Marshall you stupid shit. You have no clue how badly you've fucked up."

Again, the ghoul made no sign of changing emotion, continuing to dip its fingers in Kenji and take its time eating. Haruto knew he needed something else to get into its head so he scanned again. 'Shit' he thought, as the ghost of a smile passed over his lips. The majority of its body was covered in black that mostly obscured its shape, however, his keen eyes saw that although its grey hair was tied up, it was probably quite long when undone. At its chest area, although it was probably bound, there was the hint of a slightly tented structure. The hardest one to spot was the hips. Despite them being covered by black leather shorts, those hips were a tad too wide to be a man's.

"Alright you sick fuck. I'M A COMMIN FOR YA!"

With one last drive to uncover more courage, Haruto raised his Kokaku quinque and lept towards the ghoul.

"I'M GONNA FUCK YOU UP FOR KENJI... YOU BITCH!"

As Haruto closed the distance with extreme speed, to less than two meters, the shadow of another figure dropped from the sky, landing directly next to the first. Haruto skidded to a halt, taken aback by the new masked creature. This one was certainly taller, and its face was covered by a red, horned mask. It was only as his attention slipped completely that he realised his final mistake. For the first time, the blindfolded ghoul smiled widely, the skeletal mouth parting to reveal massive bloody teeth.

The next thing Haruto knew was that he was laying down on the ground, face to the sky. His neck was warm and dripping wet. He raised his hands to his throat as the oxygen escaped his body, feeling the deep gash that was releasing his blood. The ghouls started conversing.

"Which one you want?" the first asked the newcomer.

"I don't care. You killed 'em both so you choose" the other responded dispondantly.

"Well, you're the growing boy so you take the ghoul and the first Reaper."

"Damn, well fuck me if you ain't the best big sister" uttered the male ghoul sarcastically, as he casually walked over to Kenji and the dead ghoul. "Why you taking you're mask off you sicko? The guys not even dead yet."

"I like it when they watch me" the female ghoul giggled.

Haruto saw the shadow of something passing over his head. "Ken...Ke..ji" Haruto gasped.

Suddenly, from below him came a the same giggle. "Awww dude, I think these guys were close."

"Eyeless, eat the fucker and let's go" came the voice of the male.

"Hey buddy boy, look at me will you" said the female from his feet.

Haruto craned his neck, scared of what he might see, but thinking 'fuck it' to himself. What's did he have to be afraid of, he's already dead. When he finally focused on the face he was confused. She was chewing on a leg. His leg. When the fuck did she get her dirty hands on that? When she'd finished on his leg, licking the tips of her fingers with delight, she bent down and hovered over him. Eyeless? That's what the other one had called her, but that wasn't true at all. Now that her blindfold was off he could see the entirety of her murderous giddy face.

"You're very funny" she said. "Innocent man. Gonna have a family. Its really fucking funny."

The last thing Haruto would ever see would be a testimony to her names innacuracy. Staring at him excitedly was one grey eye, so remarkably human looking it was weird. The other eye was a pool of darkness... with a violent, blood red pupil that seemed to be trying to force its way out of its black prison. She snapped up the rest of him.

"Sicko..."

End

[possibilistfanfiction]

sutton and a trans guy, please i'm begging you! my crops would flourish, my skin would clear

[henny we all need hydration & july is no time for acne so here u go]

//

kat has to cover the new wowfull selections and truly the only reason you both decide to go instead of sending one of her interns is because there are very few things jane hates more than smorgasburg.

‘no,’ she says, about forty times, before kat offers to buy her whatever she wants on scarlet’s card and finally jane relents. 

you get there together, all crammed into what is probably the world’s tiniest via, you think, with kat essentially on adena’s lap in the back and you had let jane have the front seat because she was already grumpy. it’s so hot already and you didn’t even bother wearing makeup because it’s a sunday at noon in the middle of july and kat had made you all get out of bed so she can eat waffles from the most pretentious food truck gathering ever, so it’s truly not worth it on so many levels.

the bouncer checks your IDs and kat gets you three glasses of rose before handing you both $50, which shuts jane up momentarily.

‘i’m gonna go find somewhere to sit with adena,’ she says, and you kind of envy her right now, because she has wine and the best pair of vintage denim shorts you’ve ever seen, dramatic sunglasses and beat up sneakers. also, a beautiful girlfriend who is in a skirt that flows with the breeze in lines that oliver would love, who holds kat’s hand and you see them laughing and it’s wild, you think, how easily in love they are.

you and jane both kind of watch them walk away, a little dazed, and then she turns to you.

‘i literally hate this so much but we have $100 to spend on food so, shall we?’

she offers the crook of her elbow and you grin and you end up getting poke tacos, bahn mi, japanese street ice, green chile frito pie, and a vegan burger to share before you grab another glass of wine. kat drops you a pin and you find her and adena lounging on a blanket in the shade, thank god.

kat raises her brows at all of the food you have and you shrug. ‘you gave us the money.’

she grins and proceeds to instagram the entire spread before taking a bite of everything, which even jane laughs at.

‘kat, are you gonna get anything?’ 

‘yeah,’ she says, waves a hand around vaguely. ‘adena and i had breakfast before we came though so i’m not that hungry yet.’

jane literally spits out part of her taco to frown completely and you want to laugh because you love her so much and it’s so unnecessary but you’ll let her have it.

‘so you’re saying you dragged us to this crowded, hot, bougie food truck hell and you don’t even want to eat anything?’

‘uh, no,’ kat says. ‘i gave you $100 to eat anything you wanted and eventually i have to eat the new wowfull.’

jane groans and lies down against the blanket dramatically and adena smiles into kat’s shoulder.

‘love you so much, tiny jane,’ kat says.

//

eventually kat really does have to try the wowfull, which she proceeds to say like seven times and you’ve had three glasses of wine in like 90 degree heat so you are both decently day drunk and the word keeps making you laugh harder every time. the line is insane but at this point you’re so fucking full and apparently kat is still good to go because you’re waiting patiently, not really bothered, and jane is chatting with adena about, you don’t really know?, but something to do with memoir and sexuality in iran—honestly it’s a little shitty that you’d tuned them out and kat had too because she was just staring at adena’s boobs for a hot few minutes before you’d dragged her to finally do what you set out to in the first place.

you’re talking to her and she’s turning back, to check on adena and jane, probably, and you really aren’t saying anything that interesting so when kat breaks out in a huge grin you’re a little confused until a guy two people behind you in line spots her as well and smiles, just as big.

‘jayden, oh my god,’ she says, stepping out of the line to give him a big hug.

‘kat,’ he says, clearly excited, ‘hi!’

she steps back and looks him over and wow, okay, he’s super cute, you can see that, with skin a few shades darker than kat’s, perfect arms, an incredible smile, dimples, and, listen, you’re drunk but you have good taste no matter what.

‘you look incredible,’ she says, and then tugs him up two spots to where you still are standing in line.

‘jayden,’ she says, with a shit eating grin and you know what that means, but honestly you are not going to complain today, ‘this is sutton.’

‘nice to meet you, sutton,’ he says, shakes your hand.

‘nice to meet you too.’

‘hey,’ kat says, glancing around. ‘are you here with anyone?’

he shakes his head no. ‘i was on a run and then i got hungry, figured since i was already in the park i’d stop by.’

‘ew,’ kat says. ‘running.’

he laughs and you really think that maybe kat has like a magnet for attractive people, yourself included, because. wow.

‘so,’ you say, ‘how do you two know each other?’

‘oh,’ kat says, in the way that you know she’s trying to downplay one thing or another, ‘we went to yale together.’

‘two of three black people in our communications program,’ jayden says, and they high five.

‘that’s awesome,’ you say, and kat nods but jayden shrugs. humble, a good quality. 

‘what are you doing in the city?’ kat asks, completely ignoring the menu even though you’re like three people away from ordering, but whatever, you can wing it. 

‘i just moved to park slope,’ he says. ‘i’m doing PR for an lgbtq youth outreach program for the center.’

okay, so, he’s a good person. kat looks at you like she knows you literally thought just that, puts her arm around his shoulders. ‘always the better of the two of us.’

‘no way,’ he says, and you love seeing your friend like this, honestly. you also love seeing her friend just exist so you’re so content. ‘from what i know from your social, you are department head and you also have a very, very pretty girlfriend.’

kat nods modestly. ‘true. on both accounts.’

jayden hip checks her and kat shoves him, gently but she’s also drunk and you send an apologetic smile to the white dude behind her in a cutoff poncho and tevas, the absolute worst.

‘so,’ jayden says, drifting closer to you, ‘how do you know the illustrious katherine edison?’

you smile because kat hates her full name and she turns away with a huff to finally look at the menu, which is probably good because she actually has to order in like, four seconds. ‘we met as interns at scarlet four years ago.’

‘sutton,’ kat says over her shoulder, ‘is in the fashion department. fucking killer.’

jayden smiles when kat sighs and orders all six wowfulls on the menu because she can’t remember what she was actually supposed to review, and she waves him off when he tries to order too.

‘i just paid for, like, ten thousand calories. at least you can help us eat a few.’

jayden shrugs and you both ignore kat for a few moments while she tries to figure out how to carry all six wowfulls back to your blanket without spilling all of them and finally you both take pity on her and grab two each. she rolls her eyes and strides off in front of you and you both laugh.

jayden is cute as shit and jane has apparently seen this development and offers the two of you more wine, which she’d picked up while you were in line. 

‘thanks,’ jayden says, sitting down between you and kat. he introduces himself politely, shakes jane’s hand, and then laughs at kat’s blush when she introduces adena.

adena is thrilled to hear a few stories about kat in undergrad, how she threw up in a freshman sociology class because she and jayden had been to a party the night before and kat had never had vodka before; the time they went to harvard and tried to join a secret society to find out more about them; her apparently very intense and strict nap schedule her senior year.

kat rolls her eyes and tries to argue but you know it’s mostly for show, because she’s happy and taking pictures of all of you eating these insanely decadent desserts and adena feeds her a spoonful of ice cream and you and jane share an eye roll before you notice jayden doing the same and honestly, he’s in at that point. he’s really in when he gets kat and adena to agree to speak at an upcoming event for his youth center, something to do with intersectionality and creativity in the workplace, which like they really are both perfect for. 

kat is a very professional person, really, and lowkey a workaholic, and you know this, but sometimes—'i need to go for a walk,’ she groans, lying back on the blanket dramatically. ‘i’m. so full.’

‘fair,’ jane says, gets up and you help her throw away all of your collective trash. it’s hot as hell but the park is pretty shady at this point, but once you get out of the designated food truck area kat smirks at adena and then takes off her shirt.

apparently today was a day for kat to not wear a bra and you have literally seen her boobs more times than you can count, as has jane, and definitely adena, but her girlfriend still blushes and you roll your eyes again.

you pause because kat now wants adena to put sunscreen on her back, apparently, and when adena kisses behind kat’s ear jane says, ‘this isn’t a porn film,’ and kat laughs, loud and full and you love both of them for those exact reasons.

‘fine, fine,’ she says, accepts it and puts the sunscreen away, links her fingers with adena again.

you’re too busy being a little jealous of them to notice that jayden has taken his shirt off too but when you look over at him, to ask him something about his work or his apartment or his neighborhood, you have to swallow because, okay, abs. jane squeezes your hand and you have to fight a strangled laugh and kat and adena are off in their own fucking world a few feet ahead of you.

you don’t even notice the scars on jayden’s chest until you do, and, okay, you can do this. you know lots of trans people, you fitted a bunch of trans men for a fashion spread just last month, so everything clicks into place pretty quickly but you’re still staring and you don’t really know what to do because you’re kind of drunk and the last thing you want to do is be shitty to this dude that you think is honestly super banging—but then jane, perfect tiny jane, says, ‘wow, your abs are just. wow.’

he laughs and you laugh and you maybe have never loved another person more in the world than you love her right now. kat turns around momentarily and grins at jayden, genuinely delighted, and then winks at you.

i hate you, you mouth, and she only smiles bigger and turns forward, kisses her girlfriend’s cheek.

//

you all end up sitting near a fountain and kat falls asleep while adena plays with her hair, so then adena starts photographing her, and everything around you.

jayden is smart and funny and really, incredibly caring, and jane makes an excuse to go find the bathroom but you know she went after your second glass of wine so she doesn’t really have to go.

‘i’m glad i ran into kat,’ jayden says, and it’s sincere, for sure.

‘me too.’

he smiles, hands you his phone. ‘she’s great, but i also am very glad i got to meet you.’

and, like, you’re going to have to navigate some things, sure, but he’s fucking hot and also very kind and kat seems to love him and he’s already commiserated with jane on like eight complaints so.

you’re sutton brady, and no one is better with people than you.

‘i’m very glad i got to meet you too,’ you say, finishing your contact information. you call yourself from his phone and he smiles and you save his number.

kat wakes up because adena legitimately has to pee and jane comes back with waters for everyone—an actual angel—and you spend another hour sweating it out with your friends, and a boy you like, and you’re day drunk and exhausted by the end of it, very happy.

kat gives jayden a big hug before she and adena get into a via to head back to soho, and jane tries to shake his hand but he laughs and gives her a hug instead.

you stand on your tip toes and kiss his cheek and he glances down, a little shy, but with a smile when he looks back up at you.

‘i’ll text you,’ you say.

‘i look forward to it.’

he jogs away with a wave and jane’s face is a human version of the smirk emoji and you let out a deep breath.

‘yeah,’ she says.

‘fuck yah,’ you say.

//

the next evening you lie down next to jane in bed; you and jayden had been texting all day and you really, really like him and really, really do not want to mess this up.

‘hey babe,’ jane says, pausing whatever intense and probably boring documentary she’s watching and setting aside her computer. ‘what’s up?’

‘can you direct me,’ you say, because jane is the best and has probably researched literally everything, ‘to resources on how to not be a shitty cis partner to a trans person?’

jane grins, opens her computer to an actual, honest to god google doc, and scrolls through it.

‘i started compiling it this morning,’ she says. 

‘oh my god.’

she shares it with your email with a triumphant click. ‘i thought you’d never ask.’

you gesture to the computer. ‘you definitely thought i’d ask.’

she nods. ‘that’s true, because you’re an amazing person.’

‘i don’t think this is amazing, just, like, decent?’

‘you’re right.’ she shrugs. ‘you are amazing, though. just, you know, read and listen to some of this stuff, it’s a good baseline, and then ask him if you’re unsure about anything.’

‘yeah,’ you say. you’re both quiet for a minute and then you smile.

‘he’s so fucking cute.’

‘oh my god,’ jane says. ‘where do i even start?’

//

you’re resting your head on his chest in bed and he kisses the top of your head and then says, ‘you know kat will literally brag about this every single moment, the fact that two of her friends are together and she set us up.’

‘oh,’ you say, looking up so you can see his eyes, ‘so we’re together?’

he looks legitimately nervous and it’s endearing. ‘i—thought so?’

you roll your eyes and kiss him. ‘you’ve been my boyfriend for a hot minute already, don’t worry.’

he tilts his head back. ‘you’re an ass sometimes, you know that?’

‘i’ve been best friends with kat for five years. i have to be.’

jayden laughs and agrees and you prop yourself up on your elbows and kiss him, because kat and adena are always late for brunch, so you definitely have time.

[ywhiterain]

Fic - I'm the one who gets to make all the rules (Stelena)

I'm the one who gets to make all the rules PG, ~2700 words (Stefan/Elena, Damon/Bonnie, Klaus/Caroline)

Elena decides to break Stefan out of heaven to get him back. I promise that I put just as much thought and care into this as Julie Plec did in the finale.

Stefan's face lit up when he opened the door.

"Hello, brother," Damon said.

"Damon," Stefan said, a little breathless. He walked over, opening his arms.

Only to be socked so hard in the jaw he stumbled and fell. "What the hell was that for?" he asked, rubbing his face. "That could have really hurt me!"

"That," Damon said, as he walked into the house and towered over Stefan, "was for me. This," he grabbed Stefan's wrist and pulled him into a tight hug, "is for you." He pulled back, just a little, and shook Stefan, stared him down. "If you ever do anything so stupid again, I will wring your neck."

"Guess I should be grateful," Stefan said with a swallow. Licked his lips. "It's not something I'll have to worry about."

"Sure it is," Damon said. He pulled Stefan in for another hug. Longer, this time. And Stefan relaxed into it. He missed this, being held by his brother. "We're bringing you back."

"We?" Stefan asked. "Bringing me back?"

"Elena made a quick pit stop," Damon said. He pulled back, gave Stefan a diabolical grin, "She wanted to say hi to her folks."

Stefan's brows furrowed. "What's going on?" He shook his head. "I'm dead. You two were supposed to live a long and happy human life."

"Well," Damon said, "about that."

*

Five years before the present.

"So," Damon said, waltzing into the hotel room he was sharing with Elena, "Caroline wants to know when we'll be getting married. She's planning on holding the wedding at the boarding house slash Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters and wants to start planning it right away." He tried to smile. "She wants to throw herself into as many projects as possible so she doesn't have to think."

"Wedding?" Elena asked. She looked up from the dusty old book she was reading and gave him a dirty look. "What the hell are you talking about? We don't have time for that! Saving Stefan is our only priority right now."

*

Stefan closed his eyes and rubbed them. "Really?"

"Really," Damon mocked. "Have you met Elena Gilbert? How can you possibly be shocked?"

"I was just hoping that me taking the cure would make her realize that saving me would be a waste of time," Stefan said between gritted teeth. "Even if she brought me back, I'd be dead within a few weeks."

Damon waved him off. "She was on that right away."

*

Five years before the present.

"Here we go," Jeremy said. He turned the laptop around and slid it over to Elena. "I've been gathering everything I've been learning over the past six years on this web site."

Elena looked at the hand drawn demon staring her down. Her face softened. "You designed it, didn't it?"

"Got to have a hobby outside of fighting evil," Jeremy said, grinning. "I was searching for a way to bring you back, so there's a lot of stuff about magic on it."

Elena closed the laptop partly and gave him a stern look. "You didn't do anything dangerous to get all of this, did you?"

"Uh," Jeremy said, "Yeah. No duh."

"Jeremy!"

"I did so many stupid things," Jeremy said, "and I'm never going to tell you about them because I'd like to keep my head on my neck."

"It might be too late for that," Elena snapped.

"I wasn't going to let you rot, Elena," Jeremy said. "In case you haven't noticed, I'm really sick of losing family."

Elena's face softened. "Jer."

Jeremy grabbed the laptop. "Don't get all sentimental on me." He clicked through the web site. "I don't have anything that can help you directly, but I found out a lot of things about the cure."

*

"I think I'm going to need a drink," Stefan muttered.

"Too bad you can't get drunk here," a familiar voice said.

Stefan turned. He looked. Tried to process. "El - "

Then he couldn't speak. Elena's tongue was in his mouth. And she was cradling the back of his neck. And he was running his hands up and down her arms and across her back.

Damon interrupted them with a loud cough.

Elena pulled back with an annoyed huff. "Killjoy."

Damon tilted his head to Stefan, who was stalking around the living room, running his hands through his hair.

"Elena," Stefan said. "You have no idea how much I wish I could be with you. But I'm married." He turned his attention to Damon, eyes wild. "And you're with my brother!" Damon was rolled his eyes. "Who seems oddly okay with this."

"About that," Elena said.

*

Four years before the present.

Damon was dressed in his best suit, hold wine and flowers. Elena was in ratty jeans and one of Stefan's old shirts.

"Date night," Damon said.

Elena waved him off. She was on the phone. "Perfect. Thank you so much, Elijah. I'll be there as soon as possible."

"Guess that's off," Damon said. He dropped the flowers on the table and walked over to the bed. He kept the wine with him. "Why did we even bother getting a hotel with one bed if we never use it?"

*

"Wait," Stefan said. "Were you two still in a hotel?"

"Too busy to find a house," Elena said nonchalantly.

Stefan shook his head. "And why was Elijah involved?"

Elena turned around. "You didn't mention Klaus yet?"

"I didn't want to steal your thunder."

*

Five year before the present.

"Do you really think this is going to work?" Caroline asked.

"Yep," Elena said. Caroline still looked doubtful. "Klaus is obsessed with Stefan. He'll be jumping at the chance to save him."

"But he doesn't give a damn about you," Caroline said. "And he might decide to use newly human you to make more hybrids."

Elena grinned. "Which is why I'm asking you to escort me. Last I checked, he was still sweet on you." She knocked her shoulders against Caroline's. "You'll keep me safe."

"Fine," Caroline said, "wait. How do you know about that? It's been years since you've seen Klaus."

"Stefan left me a diary," Elena said, "he told me all about it."

"Of course he did," Caroline said under her breath. Elena figured it best not to press. "Well. I suppose I have been meaning talk to him about fund raising."

"Now to save Stefan!" Elena said, pumping her fist.

"That too!"

*

Stefan twisted his face. "Klaus and Caroline? Seriously?"

"No," Damon said.

"Maybe," Elena said.

"Sort of," Damon said.

"Let's just say she's really making him work for it," Elena said.

"Oh," Stefan said. He wasn't sure who to feel most sorry for in that. Then. "Wait. Aren't we married?"

"You being dead kind of put a kink in that," Damon pointed out.

"But you were planning to bring me back to life," Stefan said.

"We're getting to that," Elena assured him.

*

Five years before the present.

"And that's what you've missed," Caroline said with false brightness.

"What," Klaus said with an angry twitch.

"I know it's a lot to process," Caroline said, "Stefan being dead and all." She was blinking rapidly and biting her lips and clenching her fists. Every time she said it, it felt more real. She hated that part. Klaus started to move to her, to offer he comfort. But he stopped himself.

Elena walked over to Klaus and set her hands on his shoulders. "Just for now."

"Obviously," Klaus said. "I have a sketch of him I was planning to make into a painting. I believe that the blood of his killer will be a nice accent color. So, I'll need a name."

"He sacrificed himself to save us all," Caroline said.

Klaus' face became blank. "How heroic of him." He walked over to Caroline and looked her in the eyes. "Give me a name."

"Katherine," Elena said, inpatient. "But that's not really what happened." Something in the quality of her voice had Klaus turning his full attention to her. "Stefan saw a chance to kill himself in a way Damon could accept and he took it."

"Elena," Caroline said, "I know you don't want to accept what really happened. But I was there. He wanted to live. It's just... Stefan was being Stefan."

"No," Klaus said. "Elena's right. I may be a little out of the loop, but I know Stefan very well. And Elena knows him even better."

Caroline met Elena's eyes. Then Klaus. "I need to." She grabbed a purse off a table. "Go. Do things."

Klaus watched Caroline leave. Then he turned to Elena. "When we get Stefan back, I plan to have a very long talk with him about his most recent decisions."

"After I'm done with him, you can have a week." Elena said.

*

"I think I'm just going to stay here," Stefan said.

"Nice try," Elena said.

Stefan dropped down on couch. "I suppose that's only fair. I really need to explain things to Caroline." He waved his hand and some booze appeared in his hand. He may not be able to get drunk, but it could take the edge of. "And Klaus. Fuck." He took a long drink and gave Elena a dirty look, "Thanks for that, by the way."

Elena wasn't bothered. She hopped into Stefan's lap and kissed him on the nose. "You're welcome."

Stefan broke out in a smile. Then he caught Damon, who was making quick work of heaven's magic and waving him some quality booze for himself. "Things with Caroline aside..."

"That ended a while ago," Elena said.

"What," Stefan said.

*

Three year before the present.

"Look at this," Damon said, dropping a magazine in front of Elena.

"Paint swabs?" Elena asked.

"I bought our home," Damon said, "which you, by the way, had no input on."

"I was with Elijah," Elena said, "getting a really important artifact if Bulgaria." She turned her head up to give Damon a frustrated look. "You know, to bring Stefan back to life."

"Elena - "

"Don't do that," Elena said, "do not give me your stupid speech about wasting my life." She shut the magazine shut and shoved it off the table. "It didn't work when I was seventeen and it sure as hell isn't going to work now."

"We're human," Damon said carefully, "so that means we're living with an expiration date. We don't have all the time in the world to look for Stefan."

"Stefan," Elena said. She pulled away from table. "Stefan Salvatore. Your little brother. Why am I more invested in getting him back than you?"

"Yeah," Damon said. He got into her face and looked down. "Why is that? My baby brother, your ex. Or at least that's what I thought." He gathered her wrists into his hands. "What is he to you?"

Elena looked like she was going to yell. But she had no words. She slumped. "Are you really going to make me say it?"

*

"So, there you go," Damon said.

Stefan looked at Damon. Then Elena, who was happily cuddled in his lap. Awkward. "Do you two want to talk about it?"

"No," Damon said.

"It was boring," Elena said.

Fair enough.

"Besides," Elena leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Damon's got a new girl."

*

Three years before the present.

Damon woke up in a hotel bed. Looked at the woman beside him. "Shit."

"No kidding," Bonnie said. "Please tell me we were drunk."

"Not even tipsy."

"What are we going to tell Elena?" Bonnie said. "I can't believe I slept with my best friend's husband!"

"We didn't even get married," Damon said, "she got a lead Stefan and left before putting on the wedding dress."

"Oh yeah," Bonnie said. "But still."

"We broke up yesterday," Damon said. He rubbed Bonnie's shoulders. "So you don't have to feel guilty."

"What?" Bonnie said. "You took me furniture shopping just yesterday."

"In hindsight, that was probably a red flag," Damon said.

"You still should have told me," Bonnie said, grumpy.

Damon bit her shoulder and rolled her into the bed. "My mouth was a little too busy."

*

Stefan held up his hand. "No more. I think I got the picture." Then, he remembered. "What about Enzo?"

"Who?" Damon asked.

Elena looked equally confused.

"The love of her life," Stefan said. "The guy I brutally murdered, destroying her future happiness."

"Oh, him," Elena said. "It kinda ran its course after a few months. Jer gave her a pep talk about wasting her life on a ghost and that was that."

"I'm glad she's happy," Stefan said, "but I still need to make things up to her." He looked at his brother with big puppy dog eyes. "And you. I know he was your best friend and I took that away from you."

"I'm over it. I suggest you do the same." Stefan kept looking sad. Damon rolled his eyes. "I'm getting you into therapy as soon as we get out of here."

Elena took one of his hands between hers and pressed a kiss on his knuckles. "We'll talk about this later, Stefan. Get through it together."

"Thank you," Stefan said. Then he stared at her. And she stared at him. And she smiled brightly. And Stefan smiled a little.

Damon got bored. "Let's talk about Elijah and Elena."

*

<em>Five years before the present.</em>

"Thank you so much for this," Elena said.

"I didn't have much of a choice," Elijah said, "seeing as you roped my brother and sister into this."

*

"Rebekah?" Stefan asked with furrowed brows. "Why would she help get me back?"

*

Five years before the present.

"That was low," Rebekah said, watching with something that wasn't quite jealousy as Caroline, Klaus, Lizzie, Josie, and Hope playing UNO. "Using Caroline to get my brother to help you."

"He'd help me either way," Elena said, "I just wanted some extra incentive." Rebekah gave her a dirty look. "It's unlikely anything serious will happen any time soon. I know he's still hung on Cami."

"Yeah," Rebekah said softly. Then. "Wait, how do you know about Cami?"

"Freya told Stefan and Stefan wrote about in the diary he wrote me," Elena said with a shrug.

"You two are disgusting," Rebekah said.

"So that means you'll help us?" Elena asked.

"Are you kidding me?" Rebekah asked. Elena rose her eyebrows and grinned. "Fine."

*

"She's a sucker for a happy ending," Elena explained. "I suffered through so many bad rom coms while living with her. She owed me."

Stefan leaned in, "doppelganger charm didn't hurt, did it?"

Elena stuck out her tongue. "Like you can talk."

"And now Elijah," Damon said.

"Are you trying to make me jealous?" Stefan asked.

*

Five years before the present.

"I'm serious," Elena said, "I know you didn't have to do this."

"Elena Gilbert," Elijah said as he set a hand on her shoulder. "I'm honored to help you."

"Still," Elena said, "I hope you don't think I'm making you do this for free. I owe you big time."

"If you insist," Elijah said. He brushed some lint off her shirt. "But do tell me: did you offer Rebekah or Klaus anything in return for their services?"

"Nope," Elena said with a saucy grin and winked at him.

*

"Really?" Stefan asked, "winking?"

"I might have embellished a little," Damon admitted. "But they did spend a lot of time together."

"I gave him advice on Hayley," Elena told Stefan.

They kissed.

"I hate you both."

"Don't be so pouty," Katherine said as she waltzed into house.

Stefan fell off the couch. Elena happily followed. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Hell is my kingdom," Katherine said, "but it was really boring being there all the time. Elena offered to help me walk between hell and the living realm in exchange for my help."

"How did you even do all of this?" Stefan asked.

"It's a great story," Katherine said. "Unfortunately, it's a long one. And we've only got about five minutes to get out of here before the portal closes."

"How is this even happening?" Stefan demanded.

"I'll tell you when we get home," Elena promised.

THE END.