#I'm so glad I got him cause when I went to leave a review he was gone lol

[engel-hageshii]

💚💚 my Gyutaro funko is here 💚💚

he is so pretty and very well detailed too!! I love him so much!!

[sweetiesicheng]

mingyu - acting

word count : 1,119

-

once you park your car in mingyu's driveway, you have to mentally prepare yourself before going inside. after everything that happened before you left the studio, you aren't sure how to approach anything.

all of a sudden, you hear someone knock on your window and whip your head to see mingyu standing outside of your car.

"open the door," you hear him say.

you open the door and pull your legs out of the car to turn and face him.

"what happened on set?" he asks.

"it's that guy again," you say while crossing your arms. "he was being touchy in our scenes," you mention, "and he was just being weird today in general."

"did you tell someone?"

"yea, but they were all claiming that it made the scene look better. i just can't believe that!" you almost shout. "and i have to be on set at five in the morning with him," you add.

"i'll make a call. let's go inside," mingyu says to you, holding out his hand. you grab your stuff and take mingyu's hand as you get out of your car. "have you eaten yet?" he asks you.

"diet," you answer, leaving mingyu only to sigh.

"but did you eat?" he asks. you shake your head. "i have food in the fridge. let’s cook something," he suggests as you two walk into his home. "do you want to shower? you can wear my clothes," he offers to you.

you drop your belongings on a table and nod. "yea, if you don't mind," you reply.

"go," mingyu gestures with his head.

you leave to go upstairs to take a shower. mingyu waits for you to be out of his view before taking his phone out and calling someone.

"hello? oh director! i'm sorry if i'm bothering you," mingyu says when the call goes through. "how did the rest of filming go tonight? is that so? i'm glad to hear it went well. oh, well...how should i put this... nothing's wrong, but you know that new kid playing the boyfriend of the singer? yea, him. i'd watch him carefully. i was talking to another director, and they weren't happy with how his scenes ended up. just a warning, but i'm sure the scenes under your direction are fine. no, of course. don't go too crazy now, sir. actually, i might be on set early tomorrow. alright, have a good night. get some rest."

mingyu ends the call and starts cooking dinner. you're still taking a shower, trying to calm yourself down before going back downstairs.

after you're done showering, you go downstairs wearing shorts and one of mingyu's shirts. you go into the kitchen and find your boyfriend cooking.

"do you need help?" you ask mingyu. he looks back and smiles at you.

"no, it's okay," he says. "do you need to go over lines or anything?" he asks.

"oh, i should," you reply.

you grab your bag and take out your script. you sit at the countertop and review a few sections while mingyu finishes up cooking.

"you have all your scenes with that guy, right?" mingyu asks as he brings the plated food to the counter.

"huh? yea, i'll just deal with it. it's only for another few days," you say before sighing.

"i called the director," mingyu mentions.

"huh? why?" you ask, "i can deal with it, mingyu," you say to him with a huff.

"i can't help it when my girlfriend is in distress, especially if we're costars," mingyu says to you and starts pouring water into empty glasses. "i'll show that kid that he shouldn't be messing around and that he'll regret it big time."

"mingyu..."

"luckily, my character is intimidating as hell," he adds.

"yea, cause you're just a big puppy in real life."

"babe!" mingyu exclaims. he looks at you as you smile and laugh, realizing that you're starting to feel better after everything that happened earlier.

—

"babe! i got you a gift," he beams at you and hands you a box.

"hm? what is it?" you ask and open the box, to find a bracelet inside. you gasp, "it's so pretty," you say in amazement.

"it took me awhile to pick it out, but i'll buy you a ring later. i just thought this was too pretty to not buy for you," he says to you as he looks at you in adoration.

you look at him, "babe..."

"come on, let's go meet with everyone," he says and takes your hand into his before you two walk off.

"and cut! alright, let's move to the next scene."

you let go of your costar's hand and put the bracelet back in the box. you hand the box to an assistant and wait for the next scene to be set up.

"we did a great job," your costar says, patting your upper back. he leaves his hand on your shoulder, smiling at you.

"yea, glad we're done with this one," you reply before yawning. it's really early, and you're yearning for a cup of tea or coffee.

"you alright? do you want to sit down for a second?" your costar asks.

"oh, i'm okay. it's just too early for me," you reply.

"excuse me." you turn around and see mingyu walking up to you two.

"oh! sunbae!" your costar immediately speaks, "good morning. i didn't expect to see you today."

"good morning," you greet.

"oh, i reserved a coffee truck for everyone since filming started early today. you should get some to wake you up," mingyu says to him.

"i'll gladly take that offer. y/n, want me to get you coffee?" your costar asks you.

"ah, y/n, i already got you one," mingyu says, handing you a cup of coffee.

"thank you, sunbae," you say to him. the cup is warm, which feels nice since there's a bit of a breeze.

"i'll be leaving now," your costar says and hurries to the coffee truck.

you sigh in relief and take a sip of coffee. "thanks," you say to mingyu.

"mhm." mingyu smiles and brings his hand up to put some of your hair behind your ear. "i was waiting to see him in person, but i hate him even more now," he says, talking about your costar.

"well, i can already tell that the director noticed something because some of our earlier scenes were changed a bit," you reply. "thanks for coming by."

"had to be with my girl," he says. "walk with me for a second." the two of you walk off set and find a building and hide from staff. "love you," he says and kisses the top of your head.

"i love you too, mingyu."

[fablesrose]

Hiiiii! Your leverage rewrite is giving me Eliot Spencer BRAINROT and I saw your requests were open, so I was wondering if you would be interested in writing something about the reader getting a bit beat up on a job, and falling asleep on Eliot while recovering? I don’t mind if it’s a oneshot, or if you want to put it in the rewrite or something. Thanks regardless, I love your writing so much!

Hi!!! Thank you so much, you can't even believe how much that means to me! I'm glad someone else is in the Eliot brainrot with me! I'm so sorry it took so long to post this, ever since you sent this I have been thinking about it and what I wanted to do with it and I finally got it on paper. Hope you like it!

Stay With Me

Eliot Spencer x Reader Words: 2.4k

As far as jobs went, this one wasn’t too bad. The ultimate goal was to steal some files for our client to prove gross misconduct. They would then go to the press or police, probably both, knowing how these types of jobs usually went. We were approaching the end game when some guards started to catch on. Parker and Hardison needed some more time and everyone else was preoccupied. So, it fell on me to be a distraction.

I quickly made my way through the building, dodging guards along the way until I made it to where Hardison and Parker were holed up, collecting files. 

“What are you doing here?” Hardison asked when he saw me step into the room. “You’re supposed to be keeping the guards away from us!”

“And I’m working on it!” I replied. 

Parker didn’t acknowledge me as she sorted through the physical files that she pulled from a cracked safe. 

“Parker, hand me a file we don’t need,” I asked and she quickly handed one over without looking at me. I grabbed it and turned back to Hardison, “Do you have a spare flash drive that has stuff that isn't important or nothing at all?”

He looked at me with a puzzled expression before pulling one out of his bag, “What are you doing?” 

I pocketed it quickly before answering, “Well the guards are coming to this room, they know something is up. What do you think they’re gonna do when they see someone walking out of the room carrying a file?”

Hardison started to nod along, “they’re gonna go after you and not bother to check the room.”

“Yup!” I called as I approached the door to leave. 

“What about the flash drive?”

I faced him before stepping over the threshold, “If I get caught, give them something to find.” I winked before stepping backwards into the hall. 

Just in time too. As the door latched, a group of three guards stepped around the corner. They made eye contact with me and I froze momentarily. 

“Hey!” One of them yelled at me.

I quickly dashed down the hall in the opposite direction. As I turned a corner, I looked back to see that all of them were hot on my heels and passed the room without a second thought. The one who yelled at me was talking through his radio to the other guards, directing them to my approximate location to try and head me off. It worked alright. Now to test my navigation and escape abilities. 

One thing I was blessed with was a pretty good memory and an interest in architecture. I liked reviewing blueprints and with the help of Parker, I was able to remember the layout of the current building. We were also able to identify interesting weak points and possible escape routes. This wasn’t the time to doubt my memory or my speed, so I just kept running. 

The original guards chasing me had fallen further and further behind, but I could still hear them behind me, so I couldn’t slow down. I turned another corner to find a lone guard running towards me. 

Change of plan. 

He got within a couple of yards when I threw the file I had in my hand in his face. It caused him to stumble just enough for me to get a head start down a different hallway. I finally made it to a stairwell and started making my way down. I had a large enough head start that I had almost thought I had lost them as I approached the bottom. I was proven wrong when a stairwell door above me burst open and sounds of shouting echoed down the stairs. I didn’t wait to see which direction they went before I burst through a door myself into the basement of the building. 

“Y/n,” Eliot said through comms, “Where are you? You still dealing with guards?”

“Yeah,” I panted, continuing to run and navigate the twisting hallways, “I’m doing okay, I’m in the basement heading to the north east corner where there should be-”

I turned yet another corner where the largest man I had ever seen stood barely three feet away.  He was dressed in a guard uniform and had his arm outstretched right in front of me. I couldn’t finish my sentence to Eliot before the guard clotheslined me, landing me flat on my back and knocking the rest of my breath out of my lungs.

I groaned, trying to scramble to my feet. “Where the hell did you come from?” I gasped, trying to catch my breath and run away.

The guard didn’t say anything as he grabbed my arm in a tight grip, pulling me to my feet. 

I wriggled and thrashed, trying to land a blow anywhere I could to break free, but the guard still didn’t budge. “Where do they keep you? In a cage?” I yelled exasperatedly, still not finding any opening. 

The guard didn’t seem to like the insinuation and with a grunt threw me against the wall. My shoulder and hip hit first, but it didn’t completely stop the momentum of my head from hitting the wall. A jolt of pain shot through my whole body before dulling to a throbbing ache. The only thing I could seem to do was curl into a ball, hoping it would make my body feel better. 

It sounded like someone was talking to me through the earpiece, but I couldn’t focus on it or decipher who was saying what. A slight whimper escaped my lips as I tried to raise my head. 

The guard approached me and started to rustle through the pockets of my jacket. He stuck his hand into the pocket where the dud flash drive was and I mustered all the strength I could into my less injured arm and launched it at his face. I wasn’t entirely sure what I was going for, a punch, slap, or scratch his eyes out, but I made forceful contact and I did feel my nails catch skin. 

The guard stumbled back, holding his face and swore loudly, the first word I had heard him utter. 

“He speaks,” I said with a pained chuckle from the floor. 

That comment also wasn’t appreciated as the guard gave me a swift kick to the gut. I simply gasped, not being able to muster up a sound to voice the pain. I wasn’t even sure if I could breathe anymore. My eyes screwed shut and I rested my head against the floor, not wanting to muster the strength to hold it up anymore. I was expecting the guard to come back and start searching me again, or even some more pain, but it didn’t come. 

I pried one eye open to see Eliot standing a few paces down the hall.

“Don’t touch her!” He growled, taking calculated steps towards the guard. 

The guard grunted, “Make me. I’ll snap you like a twig, too.”

I saw Eliot’s lips twitch into a smile before taking a fighting stance. The fight didn’t last long once the guard made the first move. He did get a couple hits on Eliot, but not enough to slow him down and knock him out. The guard hit the ground with a large thud that I could have sworn shook the ground. 

During the fight, I was able to maneuver myself into a sitting position against the wall. I started to try and use it to stand up when Eliot quickly approached me and gently helped me to my feet. He pulled my arm over his shoulder and wrapped his arm around my waist, carrying most of my weight as we walked down the hallway. 

“Where are the rest of the guards? Do we have to hurry out of here?” I asked slowly, trying to keep the ache out of my voice and calculate how to get out. I couldn’t use my previous route with how injured and sluggish I was now. 

“On a wild goose chase,” Eliot replied, not hesitating in his steps back toward the stairwell. 

“I’m not the goose, am I?” I asked humorously, but trying to keep laughing to a minimum. I had a feeling it would hurt if I tried.

Eliot chucked though. “No, I got them out of the picture so we can get out of here.”

My mind started running in circles trying to decide what he did, but eventually I half whispered to myself, “you know what? I don’t even want to know.”

When we got to the stairs I sighed heavily, anticipating how much effort it would take to climb them. 

Eliot looked at me and could see the dread in my face. “Here, sweetheart, I’ve gotcha.” He bent down and lifted my feet, putting me in a bridal carry and started up the stairs. 

“You don’t have to do that Eliot, don’t tire yourself out for no reason,” I said, but rested my head on his shoulder, feeling oh so tired. 

“I can carry you one flight of stairs, sweetheart, don’t worry about it.”

Another sigh escaped my lips involuntarily, “I’m so tired. I want to take a nap.”

Eliot purposefully jostled me a little bit, “Stay with me, sweetheart. Don’t fall asleep before I get you out of here and see if you have a concussion. It sounded like you hit that wall pretty hard.”

I groaned just remembering that initial pain, “Don’t remind me.”

When we reached the ground floor Eliot gently placed me back on my feet to seem a bit less conspicuous when walking through the building. This floor had a lot of offices and employees milling around. When I was distracting the guards I considered it a hazard, they could have slowed me down trying to not run into them. Now as we carefully walked through, Eliot still supporting much of my weight, the employees provided a bit of cover until we reached a side door to exit into the parking lot and the van. 

Eliot loaded me into the back and sat in front of me as Nate drove off, leaving the company and its guards far behind us. Eliot took a flashlight from Hardison and shined it in my eyes. 

“Your pupils look okay, responding well to light and are the same size,” he said almost distractedly as if talking to himself even though he was addressing me. 

 I simply blinked slowly and watched him think for a moment before he turned back towards me. 

“I’m gonna ask you some questions to test your memory, okay?”

“Okay.”

“What’s your name and birthday?”

I recited it quickly in the same pattern I always did when asked.

“Good,” he praised, “now what building were we just in?”

“Jackass Incorporated,” I replied. I paused before adding on sarcastically, “Oh sorry, I meant Jackson Inc.”

I finally got Eliot to crack a smile, “Glad to hear another confirmation that your sense of humor is intact. Last thing, say the months of the year in reverse order.”

This question took a little more time as I paused every few months to think, making sure I was right. When I finally landed on January I asked, “How’d I do doc?”

His eyebrows furrowed and his nose scrunched slightly, “I’m still nervous that you got a concussion.”

I sighed, “So no nap?”

He smiled grimly, “Not yet.”

The over hour drive home was relatively quiet, but the team kept me awake by talking to me. We finally made it back to Nate’s apartment. Normally we would be celebrating afterwards, but all I wanted to do was go home, and voiced as such. Eliot left no room for argument when he said he would drive me home, still not convinced of my cognitive capabilities. Frankly, I didn’t even want to argue with him, both because it was no use, and I didn’t mind the free ride home. 

He kept talking to me when driving, making sure I stayed awake. We finally pulled up to my place and Eliot insisted that he walk me in. Again, I didn’t put up a fight. 

“Do you have any other injuries that we need to take care of?” he asked once the door closed behind us. 

“It took you this long to ask?” 

He gave me a small glare, “I figured you would have told me if anything hurt more than you could handle, but I’m just double checking.”

I smiled, showing I was kidding, “Uh huh, sure. But no, nothing feels broken, everything seems to be in working order. If anything, mostly bruises.” I patted myself down gently, finding some tender spots, particularly around my ribs where the guard kicked me. Then remembered where my head hit the wall, “Hey Eliot, would you mind checking my scalp? I don’t think I broke skin, but…”

He nodded wordlessly and pulled me towards the couch and sat me down. He sat beside me so I turned away from him so he could see the place where my head hit the wall. He gently started to comb his fingers through my hair. His fingers immediately brushed against the spot where I hit and I flinched.

“Sorry, sweetheart. I don’t feel a cut though,” he whispered to me. Even after checking the area, he continued to card my hair through his fingers. 

It felt even better than I expected and a sigh escaped my lips. My head tilted back as his fingertips explored my scalp beyond the sore spot. My eyes drifted closed and that urge to sleep washed over me again. 

“Can I fall asleep now?” I mumbled, mostly to myself. 

Eliot sighed and stopped his movements, “Yeah, I’ve kept you up for a couple of hours now, you should be okay. I should go and let you sleep.” He started to remove his hand and shifted to stand. 

I turned back around to face him and grabbed his hand, “Stay with me? I hear I’m supposed to be monitored for at least twelve hours for a possible concussion…” My eyes were fixed on our hands being clasped, but I eventually lifted my gaze to his own to find that he was transfixed on me. 

His lips curled into a smile as he shifted, leaning back into the couch, “Yeah, I think I can do that sweetheart.” He gently grabbed my shoulders and pulled me down to lay on his lap. He resumed running his fingers through my hair and across my scalp. 

I grabbed his unoccupied hand and held it to my chest, occasionally squeezing it in gratitude. It didn’t take long for the sounds of our consistent breathing to drift me off to sleep.

[sugarwithsarcasm]

Ludwig never really considered himself socially inept, sure, but this, this was just embarrassing. He knows he should be more focused on when did Feliciano consider themselves a married couple, but right now, he's arguing with Feliciano about cars.    And he kind of doesn't hate that.

---

“Ludwig, can I ask you something?” Feliciano sipped his espresso, smiling at Ludwig who hummed as he reviewed hastily typed work documents Alfred had sent him at 2 am. 

“I’m not lending you any more money.” Ludwig deadpanned, his eyes never leaving the astonishing amount of grammatical errors written in comic sans on his computer.  

Feliciano laughed, shaking his head. Ludwig shifted to look over at the bubbly Italian briefly, smiling to himself as Feliciano calmed down.

“Let’s do something stupid.” Ludwig sighed, powering off his computer. “Something dumb and mortal and fun and not work related-“ 

“Feliciano get to the point! We don’t have all day, we both have better things to do then listen to you ramble.” Ludwig side-eyed Feliciano, who giggled and took a bite out of his pastry.   

“Let’s go on a date!” Ludwig’s face turned a bright red as Feliciano rambled on. “We can both get all dressed up and I can pick you up and we can go to a fancy dinner and get gelato and then maybe walk around a garden or something with some coffee and then we can go to this lovely little bakery-“ 

“A date? Like a romantic kind?” Ludwig’s mouth went dry as he struggled to make up a coherent sentence. “ALSO WHY DO ALL YOUR DATES INVOLVE FOOD?”

“Yes, like a romantic kind! Luddy, I didn’t think I’d have to explain this all to you, really,” Feliciano paused, “I really should start listening to your brother but it’s just so much fun to disassociate whenever I see him!” 

Ludwig tried to ignore the butterflies that were violently attacking his stomach as he looked at Feliciano’s smile. “What makes you think we should go on a date romantically? Are our nations requiring an alliance? Did I miss an email-“ 

“LUDDY NO!” Feliciano reached over the table and smacked Ludwig who had been reaching for his phone. “I mean it in a romantic way! Not! Because! Of! Work!” Feliciano took one last bite out of his pastry and a swig of his espresso as Ludwig stared at him in confusion. “Plus, come on! We’re practically a married couple at this point!” 

Ludwig clutched his chest as he felt himself have his third heart attack of the day. “WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?” 

“Oh come on!” Feliciano threw his hands up dramatically. “We are having breakfast together for the third time this week! I made you coffee! I’m literally petting your dog in your pajamas! We slept in the same bed last night!”  

“You broke into my house! If I could, I would have you banned from the entire nation of Germany centuries ago!” Ludwig swatted Feliciano with a nearby notepad, causing the bubbly man to squeak, muttering apologies in rapid (incomprehensible) Italian. Ludwig’s German shepard Aster, let out a soft yelp as Feliciano took his hands off his silky, shedding fur. 

Felicino vigorously shook his head, his auburn bedhead hair flopping around his head like his arms had when Ludwig had first tried to introduce him to weights years ago, a childish pout gracing his soft, tan face. Just as Ludwig began to apologize for being rude (Just as Ivan’s therapist had told Ivan to do, and Ivan had eagerly told just about every other nation in the Northern Hemisphere.), Feliciano began to shake his head and laugh.   

“Oh Ludwig,” he started, his laugh dying down into a soft smile, “you don’t mean that. You know you,” Ludwig watched Feliciano bite his bottom lip and fiddle with his hands that were now both placed in his lap,“you know you like me!”  

“No I do not.” 

“Yes you do.” Feliciano hummed as he got out of his chair, taking his dishes to the sink. Aster lay down at Feliciano’s feet as water began to flow from the faucet as Feliciano washed his dishes singing, “Luddy’s got it bad for me, Luddy’s got a crush on me”, to himself. 

Ludwig paused for a moment and smiled as he watched Feliciano dance and sing to himself as he washed the dishes, the sunlight streaming through the sheer, gaudy floral curtains Feliciano forced Ludwig to put up. He found himself standing up and taking a few steps over to Feliciano who stopped singing and dancing, looking over at Ludwig with a kind of teasing confusion, a daring look in his eye unique to Feliciano. 

Well, Ludwig reasoned to himself, maybe he did feel a little less lonely, a little less hopeless when he was with Feliciano. Maybe he slept a little better near him and wouldn’t push Feliciano off of him immediately when he would find the smaller man clinging to Ludwig and nuzzling into his chest. “Maybe if I have a few hours of undisturbed work ,” he swatted Feliciano’s mischievous smirk with the back of his hand, hiding a playful smile, “then we can have dinner at home and, um-” 

“kiss!” Feliciano dramatically cradled his cheeks in his hands making a kissy face while closing his eyes. 

“NO!” Ludwig yelled, his face burning and his voice cracking. He muttered indignantly to himself and attempted to regain control over Feliciano’s hysterical laughter, “I WILL NOT HESITATE TO STOP EXPORTING YOU YOUR STUPID LITTLE ITALIAN GERMAN CARS.”  

Feli gasped before grabbing a clean, metal spoon and shaking it in Ludwig’s face, “NO PLEASE NO, LUDWIG THAT'S OUR CHILDREN YOU CAN’T-” 

“IT'S A BUNCH OF CARS FELICIANO, ALL IT IS IS A METAL AND ENGINE AND-” 

“YEAH WELL HOW DO AM I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT YOUR NOT A TOTAL HUNK OF METAL AND I’M ACTUALLY AN ENGINE-” 

Against his better judgment, Ludwig let out a warm laugh, Feliciano quickly joining him in laughter. They stood for a few quiet moments, stupidly laughing together, smiling together, happy together. 

“Feliciano?” 

“Yeah Luddy?” 

His heart skipped a beat, “Make dinner tonight, we’ll clean the kitchen together and walk the dogs in the evening.” 

Feliciano’s eyes lit up, “Can we watch a movie together afterwards?” 

Ludwig smiled, “Deal.”

[amagicdoctor]

i'm excited for dark xmen as an archangel fan but something dawned on me when i focused on the cover right after going through your blog again (been doing that a lot since sins of sinister). see i didn't get the chance of reading nightcrawlers or legion of x myself so your reviews were my only reference for what went down in them. from what i understood, warren was corrupted by a magic spell in legion of x worse than kurt and nightcrawlers showed that the only way to eradicate it was by killing margali right? because the warren on dark xmen's cover is no longer corrupted and it's not set in the sins of sinister timeline.

i think sons of x won't end well for margali

Oh!!! I'm so glad you remembered that Angel part, cause I totally forgot 🫣, and now that you reminded me, I had hoped Marvel didn't forget either.

I would argue that out of everyone, Nightcrawler had it worse because Margali gave him an extra dosage of magic just to torture him. Angel + co. only got the first hit of it, but not as bad as Kurt got (see LOX #10).

By SoS the super-mutated people got hidden away by Sinister because even he couldn't get a fix for them, and I assume Angel went with them. But in Dark X-Men it seems Angel is back to his original form... but how I wonder? I can't even theorize because I am so out of track for how the timeline works right now 😅

And then Sons of X.. oh my God I didn't even know that was a thing.

I think this leaves off directly after LOX?? Cause if so that makes me so happy I miss that series so much and there was a lot left uncovered.

I think after that pathetic display by Margali in SoS, we will see the full fight between her and Mother Righteous? So I would say that Nightcrawler + co. will be avenged in this story by bringing ol girl to her end.

Also I would definitely recommend checking out a real comics review blog for the full scoop on Nightcrawlers/Legion of X because this blog has only talked about some pieces of it, so you could be missing out on some important plot points 😲

[quarter-life-crisis2]

Can I be added to tag list please? I did it, I’m up to date!

This review is probably not as insightful as the last cause I gave my character analysis already, this is more just disorganised thoughts.

I feel like this might be Laura’s evil origin story haha just imagine you know only what she knows… I’d be so pissed off after 😅 man, I got deep before, so I stand by what I said. But I keep laughing (not at her pain but the situation). 

The girl is blissfully sleeping upstairs, being pretty even in her sleep, at her pretty boyfriend's house, and he thinks that she’s basically pretty but not his style (he likes nights better), that she’s got a simple heart??!?! My god bro, I’m sure she’s also got some emotional complexity, and the whole time she’s all happy he’s thinking of another girl and dating you because he’s embarrassed because he thought he got rejected. 

I’d be so mad and embarrassed that I’ve just been laalalalala when thats going on in reality! I’m telling you, villain origin story!!! 

Anyway, I still empathise with his choices, I think sometimes you’re already in the hole, might as well keep digging than admit you were wrong. I’m glad he’s finally realised he should’ve heard her out, but it’s obvious he’s not got the ability to handle these situations yet. he can barely talk about it, and he keeps switching between past and present in regard to his feelings. I suspect that's because it would make him feel even worse if he accepts that he's feeling this way while in a relationship as well. He still needs to accept his new reality and repair the relationship with Tae. 

ALSO how did I just realise Jo is called Jo cause the writer is Jo?!?!? I’ve been following her for months and read what was hidden ages ago hahaha 7 chapters it took me, I’m so slow 

MC must have huge abandonment issues. Between her dad leaving and finding a better life, her mum being just, 🥶 and now this as well, and you got the little fracture between her and Jiiho (which is understandable, she’s excited with her new relationship, trying to balance it out). She’s mentioned a few times now that she gets jealous seeing their happy lives (dad, friends), also relatable. Living in that home with her mum feels like an isolating and lonely experience. With all that, she's doing well and she's learning how to manage things healthily. I feel like you could've written her to be so much more reactive, but I'm glad that while she has a tempter, it's obvious she's not extremely young, she's had some time to work on herself.

But I wanna add, while I can imagine things are hard for the dad, i think he should try a bit harder. Meet her halfway for a little trip, something. Being kind isn’t enough. I’m glad she confided in him and it went well. It would be good for her to accept his family, while it might always hurt, it might give her a safe space too.

But yeah, sad all around but I think we're halfway? So onwards and upwards?

The Forgotten Spaces | ch 7 (jjk)

☆summary: you've been dancing on the same dance crew since your teenage years, and you finally have an important role in it. It feels like life is taunting you when your rival comes back after disappearing for a year, ready to tease you every chance he gets. Will the teasing turn into more, or are you going to take him down with you?

☆pairing: photographer and dancer!Jungkook x dancer!female reader

☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, there is mature content in previous/later chapters)

☆genre: slow (SLOW) burn enemies to lovers, college!au, slice of life!au, angst (oop), smut and fluff

☆warnings: alcohol, the park jimin effect, angst (always and forever🥲), curse words

☆word count: 8.7k

☆series masterpost here

☆a/n: More angst. More pain. Enjoy reading <3 and thank you to @moonleeai for her beta reading on this fic, I won't ever thank you enough, you're the best <3

☆Read What Was Hidden here, the fic that inspired this whole story, written by @daechwitatamic, one of my fav human beings on this app <3 It follows the story of Jo and Taehyung before The Forgotten Spaces

☆☆☆☆☆

For this meeting of our end of the world

It's with you that I want to sing

On the threshold of the memories the dead of today

Them that breathe for us

The forgotten spaces

Je t'écris - Gaston Miron (rough translation by me)

☆☆☆☆☆

Thursday, August 23rd

                You hardly can believe how fast your internship has passed. It feels like you’ve only just started yesterday, and now you’re leaving for the last time. You’re skipping dance practice again today, because you’re getting dinner with the lawyer you’ve worked with all summer.

You don’t mind. Skipping practice, that is. You’ll take any excuse not to be in the same room as Jungkook for longer than needed.

The first few days after the night he told you about Laura were rough. You barely can remember them today: it’s like you were walking through molasses, with all your moves feeling incredibly heavy. Like you had the weight of the world on your shoulders.

It was hard to see him at first too. But out of spite you didn’t want to stop going to practice, until Mary told you that taking breaks once in a while could be good for your mental health. She wasn’t wrong, and now you’ve been ditching as much as you can, practicing the choreographies alone or with Jiho whenever she’s not busy with Hobi.

While you were breaking, Jiho was blossoming. You don’t think you’ve ever seen her as happy as Hobi makes her. It makes you envious, a lot more than it healthily should be, but you’ve let her be. Just because you’re hurting doesn’t mean she has to be hurting too.

Dinner with the lawyer goes well. She congratulates you for the job you did, even suggesting that you could work for her firm once you graduate. It’s a small firm, but a pretty successful one so you smile and nod and say you’d love to.

You’re not sure if you really mean the smile, but she doesn’t know you well enough to tell. You think no one really knows you well enough to tell. Jiho has been seeing life through pink-tinted lenses, and even she doesn’t really know that you’ve been feeling like shit.

So much for being good at pretending, you think to yourself. Because pretending is just another way to isolate yourself, until you’re standing alone on your side of the world, watching everyone evolve around you as if they’re not even in the same universe, as if you live in a forgotten space of theirs.

It’s a strange feeling, but you’ve been growing accustomed to it.

You’re supposed to meet Jiho, Jo, Bridget, Heather and Kiko at some bar later, but you’ve found yourself bailing on them more often now too. Maybe because they’re all happy, all coupled up, and sometimes it makes you lonelier than anything else could.

No, you’ve grown closer to Scottie instead now, and the girls let him come to Thirsty Thursdays because they know you won’t come if he’s not there. Right on cue, your phone vibrates in your purse.

[9:31 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: hurry, i’m alone with jo and kiko and i barely know them🤡 [9:32 pm] You: didn’t u grab a lyft with jiho and heather? [9:34 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: practice finished early and jiho wanted to hang with hobi a little before [9:35 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: and heather went to see bridget first bc and i quote [9:35 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: they haven’t boned in a while [9:36 pm] You: 🙄🙄 they coulda done that after [9:38 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: fuck I know. why can’t i have a man to fuck uh😩 [9:41 pm] You: i’m in the Lyft. [9:41 pm] You: bitch, i know for a fact u’ve fucked that dude from last week [9:42 pm] Scottie baby🤘🏻: why can’t i have a new man to fuck uh😩

You almost laugh out loud, and you put your phone away in your purse as your Lyft zooms down the street, heading towards the bar Bridget chose. You arrive about twenty minutes later, and you meet with Jiho outside. And to your surprise, Hobi is standing next to her, and he offers you a beaming smile as you stop next to them where they’re standing in line.

“Didn’t know you were allowed to come,” you tell him, and you look at Jiho, features painted in a ‘he definitely isn’t allowed to come’ look.

Jiho shrugs sheepishly. “Apparently the boys are going to be here too.”

The boys. The boys. Which means Jungkook will likely be here too. And as usual the thought of Jungkook makes your heart squeeze in your chest. You don’t think it’s gotten any better since he told you. It’s only been a month and a half after all.

“Oh,” you let out flatly.

You don’t care that you don’t sound enthusiastic. You are not. You don’t go out with them, you don’t want to go out with them. Jiho knows it, you’ve told her, but her pink-tinted glasses really have been changing her.

Changing your relationship with her too. Or maybe it’s you, and you’ve just been too jaded. You reckon hanging out with someone that’s breaking might not be fun. It is not fun and though Jiho has always been there for you, it’s not the same anymore.

“I’m sure it’ll be fun,” Jiho says, but she sounds unsure. As if she’s just realized that this might be a bad idea.

“Yeah,” you reply. You look away from her, teeth digging in the inside of your lip. “Are they…” you trail off, because as a matter of fact, they are. And they are right in your line of sight.

It’s your first time seeing Laura in person. You had no idea what she looked like, and somehow the small petite blonde that is walking hand in hand with Jungkook is not what you expected Laura to be. She’s pretty, beautiful, in the natural kind of way of someone that doesn’t need makeup to look good. Her hair is long, and she’s curled it from the looks of it, because you doubt someone’s hair can look this good without a little help. She’s wearing a pale floral skirt, along with a pastel crop top that complements her figure far too well.

She catches you looking and she offers you a smile. It’s a sweet smile, and you’re struck that she probably has no idea. No idea of what Jungkook was to you, what you were to him.

And maybe you were nothing after all. Maybe you really were alone that night under the stars.

Your gaze shifts to Jungkook next. Where Laura is pale, Jungkook is the complete opposite. He’s dressed in his usual partying clothes – black cargo pants with an oversized black t-shirt. This time, he’s wearing the chain with large links around his neck, and his gaze meets yours the moment you move to his face.

You wish you were the kind of girl that can say she moves on easily. You wish you could be the kind to be happy for Jungkook, to wish him all the best. But right now, your blood feels like it’s curdled in your veins, and your heart drops in your stomach.

You turn away, features turning pale. Hobi notices, and he pushes Jiho towards you before walking up to where Jungkook and Laura are. It leaves you alone with Jiho, fighting the hurt in your chest.

You’re weak. The cataclysm made you far too weak.

“He said he wasn’t going to come,” Jiho mutters. “I… I’m sorry.”

“Do you really even care?” you ask. It’s bitter, you know that it is. Bitter and unfair but you’re aching.

She seems taken aback. It’s the first time you’ve spoken to her like that. The tone you used is the one you reserved for Jungkook back when you had more to offer to him than hi and goodbye at dance practice, back when you thought you hated him and everything that he stands for.

“Y/n…”

“Sorry,” you apologize. “I just wasn’t expecting to see them.”

She looks apologetic, and she puts a hand on your arm. “We can leave if you want.”

You do want to leave. But you think about Scottie inside, you think about how life has just been happening around you. Yes, maybe you’ve had a hard time stepping out of that moment when he told you about Laura, but everything else around you has moved.

You need to move on too. You’re aware of it.

“It’s okay,” you say, flatly. “I’ll just ignore them.”

“No, really, we can go,” Jiho insists. “Sungie is at Felix’s, they’re chilling with some friends. We can go there if you want.”

You take a deep breath, and it goes in a little shakily, getting stuck in the jagged pieces of your heart that are clogging your throat. You shake your head no once more. “It’s fine.”

“I’m paying for all of your drinks tonight,” Jiho then says. “And we’ll find you some cute guy to dance with so you show him just how you’ve been moving on.”

A big fat lie, because you haven’t been moving on at all. But if it can make her happy, if it can help just a little, then you’ll do it.

It’s in that state of mind that you find your way inside. You meet with Scottie, Jo and Kiko where they’re sitting in a corner. To your surprise, Scottie seems fully at ease now, joking with the two girls as if he’s known them forever. He sees you before the girls, and he waves at you with a bright smile.

His smile falls when he looks at a spot over your shoulder, and you can only assume that he’s seen Jungkook coming in with Laura and Hobi.

You make your way to him, Jiho on your heels, and he throws an arm around your shoulder to pull you closer to him. “What the actual fuck?” he says in your ear.

You shrug, before grabbing your phone in your purse.

[10:07 pm] You: jiho forgot to mention the boys were invited lol

You don’t press send, but you show him the message as Jiho moves closer to Jo and Kiko. Scottie scoffs next to you, shaking his head a little.

“I’m not surprised,” he whispers in your ear. “Let’s go get plastered.”

“What the fuck is JK doing here?” Jo asks, and your eyes widen as you look at her.

She’s staring at where Jungkook, Laura and Hobi stopped, and you notice they’ve been joined by a guy you don’t know. The guy has a smile that brings out dimples on his cheeks, and you reckon he’s cute.

That’s when an idea forms in your brain. It’s a little evil, but you think it may be deserved.

“That’s a good question, uh,” you reply bitterly.

Kiko’s pretty mouth turns into an upside-down smile before she lets out a laugh. Seeing her come out of her shell over the last few weeks has been an experience, but you reckon you’re starting to like her more and more every time you see her.

“He’s an asshole doing asshole things,” she says, shrugging her shoulders. “Y/n, do you want to grab some shots?”

She’s usually not the one to suggest shots all that much, but you smile wickedly. “You’ll never see me refusing such a generous offer.”

Jiho and Jo have been speaking in hushed tones, and Jo throws you an apologetic look. As if to say she had nothing to do in all of this. And then it’s Jiho’s turn to look at you, and she mouths ‘I’m sorry’.

You shrug your shoulders at her, before glancing down pointedly at your phone. She furrows her brows when you meet her gaze again, and you just repeat the motion until she’s grabbed her phone.

“I’ll go get the shots with you,” you tell Kiko, but you start typing on your phone.

[10:15 pm] You: is jimin coming

You press send, and look up at Jiho. She snorts, and she’s typing when you put your phone away to follow Kiko to the bar. Scottie ends up following you, and the three of you do shots at the bar before meeting back with Jiho and Jo with a full platter of more shots. They’ve been joined by Hobi, but Jungkook, Laura and the other guy are nowhere to be seen. You’ve just had the time to put down the shots on the table when Bridget and Heather arrive, and they immediately go to the bar to get some shots for themselves too. As you’re waiting for them to come back, you grab your phone from your purse.

[10:16 pm] Jiho❣️: LMAO [10:17 pm] Jiho❣️: i don’t think so?? i didn’t talk to him but you could ask him😉 [10:28 pm]  You: oh i will😏

You raise your gaze from your phone to watch her reaction when she reads the words. At the smile that forms on her lips, you decide that yes, you’re really going to do this.

Fuck Jungkook.

Your eyes fall back to the screen of your phone and in no time you switch to your conversation with Jimin. For that, you have to move to Instagram, but a heartbeat later, you’re looking at the last thing he sent you, which is just a laugh react to a story you posted about messing up a meal you made last week.

And then you’re typing away, and for the first time in weeks you don’t feel quite as heavy.

[10:30 pm] You: are u coming tonight?😏

You put your phone away once again, because Heather and Bridget have arrived with their shots, and everyone is getting ready to drink. You grab yours, and you clink it with the rest before downing it in a swift motion. The vodka burns, and you’ve never been a big fan of vodka after the vodka incident, but you reckon it’s going to do the deed tonight.

After the shots are done, you go back to the bar, this time with Jo. She’s a little cautious around you. She’s been that way since the cottage, actually, and you usually act as if you don’t notice. But tonight, you really have set your mind elsewhere.

“It’s fine, you know,” you tell her, and you reckon this time you’re starting to mean it. “It was bound to happen one day.”

She purses her lips as you stop behind two guys ordering at the bar. “But it shouldn’t be happening on Thirsty Thursdays.”

“I texted Jimin,” you admit, hoping that it will show her that today really is in fact Thirsty Thursday to you.

Her gaze widens and her mouth hangs open for a few seconds before she says, “What did you say?”

“I just asked if he’s coming,” you say, shrugging your shoulders.

“And?”

You wet your lips. “I haven’t checked if he replied yet.”

Jo lets out a sound that resembles a snort and a shriek at the same time. “What are you waiting for!”

Her enthusiasm makes you laugh. “We both know that Jimin isn’t far when Jungkook is implied, I don’t think I really had to ask.”

“Bitch, you might just be right,” she agrees, and you laugh together as the two guys get their drinks and move away from the bar.

You order a gin and tonic, and as you’re waiting for it to be ready you finally grab your phone from your purse. Jimin has replied, and your smile is a little truer than it’s been in a while.

[10:37 pm] park.jm: yeah why? [10:41 pm] park.jm: you wanna see me?😉

You chuckle, and you show your phone to Jo. She laughs, and she gets her drink before she can say anything. You’re surprised to see her features turning a little somber as she sips from her glass.

“Something wrong?” you ask.

She holds your gaze for a few seconds, worrying at her bottom lip. “Just… are you sure you’re interested in Jimin like that?”

“Mmh,” you let out, sighing. “He’s really attractive.”

That makes her laugh a little. “Yeah.”

There’s a silence while you get your gin, and you turn back towards her once the glass has settled in your hand. “Honestly, Jimin is my type. I didn’t really want to… you know… when…” you trail off, because you can’t believe you’re about to say this out loud. “When Jungkook was in the picture.”

There it is. The words fall out of your mouth like snow falls, lazily, crossing the space between you and Jo ever so slowly. It feels strange to hear them, to acknowledge their truth. But you’ve been working towards that with Mary and maybe, maybe you’re having a breakthrough.

“But now that he clearly isn’t anymore,” you add, shrugging your shoulders. “Why not?”

Jo is smiling, but it’s terribly sad. Like she knows your soul, like she sees you in your forgotten space. Like she knows maybe you’re just trying to compensate, maybe you’re just trying to hit him where it hurts.

And so what if that’s what it is?

“Yeah, why not,” she says. “Just be careful.”

You nod once, before taking a sip of your drink. It’s stronger than expected, and you wince a little before saying, “I promise”.

And with that the conversation passes, and you move to lighter subjects. You ask Jo about her upcoming semester, and you decide not to reply to Jimin. Because he’s going to be here anyway – you’ll talk to him in person. That comes quicker than you thought it would: Jimin walks up to you along with Taehyung while you and Jo are still lingering at the bar.

Jimin changed his hair. It’s pink now, and you never expected you would say this, but it suits him almost better than the blond. He offers you a dashing smile that turns into a smirk as you tilt your head to the side, pulling at some dry skin on your bottom lip.

“Hey,” you greet him.

He moves closer to you, nudging you with his elbow. “Did you leave me on read because you wanted me to come talk to you in person?”

You chuckle, before sipping from your glass, just to make him wait a little longer. “Maybe?”

“What’s gotten into you?” he asks, and his lips settle into his usual smirk once more.

You shrug. “Can’t I want to see you?”

He wets his lips, and his smirk turns into a dashing smile again. “I mean, I can’t blame you, I’m the whole package.”

You laugh out loud, punching him in the shoulder. “Jimin!”

He laughs too, and it makes his features beam. He’s pretty, infinitely so, and for a moment you feel shy standing next to him.

“What are you drinking?” he asks.

You hand him the glass. “Gin and tonic, you want some?”

He doesn’t answer, but he grabs the glass. His fingers brush yours, and it’s like he did it on purpose. He takes a sip, and much like you he scrunches his nose as the taste hits his tongue.

“Did you get a double?”

You chuckle. “No, but it’s strong, isn’t it?”

He nods. “You’re planning to get plastered?” he asks as he hands you your glass back.

You tilt your head to the side, offering him a smirk of your own as you take the drink. “Now that you’re here, I might chill out on the alcohol.”

He doesn’t seem like he gets what you mean, or maybe the fact that Jungkook appears in the circle you’re forming with Jimin, Jo and Taehyung stops him from flirting back.

You avoid Jungkook’s gaze, though you reckon he didn’t even look at you once. His eyes are on Jimin’s profile, and he has a fixed smile on his lips.

“Jimin-ah!” he says.

Everyone falls silent, and the atmosphere turns far too awkward all of a sudden. Jungkook seems to realize, because he pouts a little, the way he always does when he’s a little upset or when people don’t reply to him. He seems to get the message though, because he pulls at his piercing before saying, “I was just wondering if you guys wanted shots”.

You think it’s a little stupid that he asked that. And it seems you’re not the only one, because Jimin declines. Jo and Taehyung say yes though, and you decide to walk away. You pull Jimin behind you, though you barely have to pull him.

“You know he’s not going to like us talking,” Jimin points out.

You look over your shoulder, behind Jimin, only to see Jungkook wrapping his arm around Laura’s shoulders before pressing a kiss to her temple. As much as it hurts, it also tells you that maybe he doesn’t even care at all.

“I think he’s busy with his girlfriend,” you reply. You drink the rest of your glass in a few long gulps, and then put it down on an unoccupied table. “Do you want to dance?”

Jimin looks you up and down once. You reckon you’re dressed a little formally for a club, but his eyes still drink you in before he says, “I’d never tell you no.”

He’s not aware of this. He has no reason to be, but you asking him that question stung. It still stings, because it makes you think of someone else. Someone who’s now kissing their girlfriend, and all you can think to do is watch.

Jimin notices, and he grabs your hand before pulling you away.

“First thing you’ll want to do,” he says gently, “is to stop looking at them.”

“Sorry,” you apologize.

“Don’t.” He offers you a smile as he stops on the outskirts of the dancefloor. “Don’t apologize. It’s okay.”

“You don’t mind?”

Jimin shrugs, and you think you’ve never seen him as serious as he is right now. “We don’t control our feelings. And you’re my friend. If I can help you in any way, I’ll do it.”

It’s sweet of him. And truly, Jimin is sweet. He cares about the people around him far more than he lets it show, and you think maybe that’s the reason why you’ve always appreciated him after all.

“Can you make me forget?” you ask as you take a step closer to him.

He wets his plump lips with a dart of his tongue. “I can try.”

That’s the only reason why you don’t resist when he pulls you into a kiss. And Jimin kisses well. At first, it’s just lips, but soon enough his tongue flicks at your bottom lip, and you let him in. His hands find your waist, and he pulls you closer as you sigh in his mouth. Your hands find leverage on his chest, and you kiss him slowly, languidly, though your thoughts run back to someone else.

They run back to a hot tub and the stars, and you stiffen in the kiss. Jimin gets the cue and he pulls away, resting his forehead against yours.

“I’m sensing this is not what you wanted,” he murmurs, and you barely even hear him over the music in the bar.

You move your hands until your arms are wrapped around his neck. “I think we should dance.”

He nods against you, and he pulls away, though his hands don’t move from your waist for a time. When they do, it’s to gently grab your wrists to move your own hands away from his neck, though his fingers close around yours.

“You keep your mind here with me, okay?”

You nod, because you don’t think you can talk right now, and you let him lead you to the middle of the dance floor. He pulls you close as you dance, and you reckon Jimin is a great dancer. His body moves with grace, and you find yourself enthralled by it, until you’re grinding your ass on him, his hands on your hips guiding your movements. His head is hung low, and your face is turned towards him. You’re so close you could almost kiss again, but this time Jimin doesn’t cross the distance.

He’s letting you decide what you want and right now you don’t know what you want. You just follow the rhythm, and focus on the reality of his body against yours. But as soon as one of his hands moves from your hip to your waist, you decide to just dive in, and you press your lips against his again.

He kisses you hesitantly, and it pisses you off. You want him to kiss you rough, to kiss you stupid until you forget everything that’s happened over the last few weeks. It feels unlikely that it’ll happen, but he tastes good. He tastes good and he’s slowly giving into you again, lips moving with more fervor.

You pull away just long enough to turn in his arms, until you can grab the collar of his shirt to pull him back into the kiss. Your mouths collide, and his fingers dig in the skin of your waist as your tongues meet.

You moan in his mouth when he sucks on your tongue, before pulling away to catch your breath. And even though you didn’t plan to look away, your eyes slide to a spot on your left.

You catch Jungkook’s gaze. His features are unreadable – he doesn’t even look upset. He looks like he’s just watching strangers kiss in a bar, and maybe that’s what you are to him now. It really does feel like you’re nothing but a stranger when he laughs and his gaze moves away from yours.

It breaks something inside of you. You didn’t think you had anything left in you that could break, but something snaps and you take a step back from Jimin.

“Fuck,” you let out.

Jimin’s eyes are closed, but he lets out a chuckle. “You can’t stay with me.”

“It’s just…” you trail off. You curse again, and one of your hands moves to your chest, to the spot that aches. “I thought I could.”

Jimin sighs, before opening his eyes to look at you. He doesn’t look hurt, but he does look sad. “He’s fucking stupid, you know that right?”

You chuckle bitterly, nodding your head. “Sometimes I feel like he did it to hurt me.”

You haven’t even dared tell your therapist that. But the words are out now, and Jimin only nods.

“I think all of us believe that,” Jimin agrees. “He’ll regret it, you know?”

That, more than anything before, shatters you completely. You find yourself blinking away tears, and Jimin just watches you with that sorry expression on his features.

“Will he?” you ask. You choke out a laugh. “I shouldn’t care.”

Jimin runs a hand through his hair. “We don’t control who we care about.”

He’s right. And it feels like he means more, or maybe you’re just imagining it. “Jimin…”

“Not…” He laughs. “I didn’t mean that I care about you like that. You’re a good friend. But…” he trails off, and for the first time in his life you think Park Jimin is shy. “I’m not the type of guy who does relationships. We could have sex, but then what would be left of our friendship?”

It’s like a parallel to what happened with Jungkook, but Jimin is offering you a way out on a silver platter. Still, it’s weird to talk about that on a dancefloor. It makes you laugh a little, and your mood shifts a little too, becoming lighter.

“You know,” you say, tentatively. “I’d rather have you as a friend too. I’m sorry about tonight.”

“Y/n,” Jimin says. He takes a step closer to you, grabs your hand and squeezes it gently. “Don’t apologize. And fuck Jungkook. You deserve way better.”

Tears sting at your eyes again, and you hold Jimin’s hand tighter. “Thank you.”

He offers you a sweet smile. “Anytime.” He looks around, but doesn’t seem to find what he’s looking for. “Do you want me to go get Jiho?”

You consider it. You’d like to cry in Jiho’s arms, the way you did when you were younger. But right now, you don’t feel like she’d be much comfort. As much as you love her, you’re seeking a lonelier company.

And maybe that’s why you panicked with Jimin in the first place. Because you’re not ready. You want to be, you want to forget everything about that July night, but you can’t. It was the culmination of too many feelings, and your heart has yet to recover.

“Honestly, I think I’m just going to head home,” you admit.

“Are you sure?” Jimin asks.

You wonder if this is hurting him. You hope it’s not. You genuinely appreciate his friendship, and you don’t want to lose it, though you reckon maybe the kisses have been enough to fuck things up.

You tend to fuck things up all the time, don’t you?

“Yes, I’m sure,” you finally reply.

Jimin nods, before pulling you into a hug. “I’m really sorry he hurt you.”

Your vision is blurred with tears now, but you made a promise to yourself all those weeks ago. The promise still stands, and you blink the tears away.

“Ah, it’s life,” you say, shrugging your shoulders as you pull away. “I’ll get over it.”

Jimin offers you a hopeful smile. “I know you will.”

You wish him a good night, hugging him one last time before walking away. You don’t look back to see if he’s watching you leave, to see if Jungkook is watching you leave. You don’t want to know, just want to breathe some air and stroll out in the night.

You make it four blocks away from the bar when the tears win the fight, and a few of them roll on your cheeks. You dry them with the back of your hand angrily, and surprisingly enough, it does the trick. Your eyes don’t line with silver again, and you take a deep breath as you keep on walking.

You make it three other blocks away when you realize that it’s late at night and you shouldn’t be walking alone. You’re not in a dangerous part of town at least, so you sit on the curb before grabbing your phone. You’d call a Lyft, but the thought of sitting in silence with an unknown driver just makes you feel worse. So you go to your text message, worry at your lips while you scroll down until you find your conversation with Jisung.

[11:57 pm] You: can u come pick me up?

Jisung replies a lot faster than you expected.

[11:59 pm] Sungie: what’s wrong? [00:00 am] Sungie: aren’t u with jiji [00:01 am] You: i left. i feel like shit… [00:02 pm] Sungie: felix says he can drive, drop ur location

It’s starting to rain by the time they arrive. Jisung sits with you in the back seat and you tell them everything. You tell them you have feelings for Jungkook. You tell them you feel like you’re losing Jiho, and like you’re losing your mind too. Jisung just holds your hand as you speak and cry, and when you get to Jisung’s house, the two boys force you to sit on the couch in the basement while they go get blankets. They come back with that and snacks, and soon enough you’re settled between them two, telling them about the cottage. About how you think maybe you’ve always had feelings for Jungkook, but never got the courage to admit it to yourself. You tell them about how it hurt to see him with his girlfriend, and how Jiho hid from you that they were going to be there.

You speak so much your throat gets dry, and Felix goes to get water for you. And when you’re done speaking, they comfort you, and you realize that you’re not standing in a space forgotten by everyone. Because Jisung is here with you, and so is Felix.

And so was Jimin, you reckon. Scottie and Jo and Kiko too. You’ve been so focused on your breaking heart that you couldn’t see the people that are there for you. It’s a strange thing to realize suddenly, and it gets you all emotional, all vulnerable.

Felix is dosing off on the couch next to you when Jisung asks, “Did you ever tell Jungkook how you feel about him?”

The tears come back then, and you blink them away. “I tried. It didn’t work.”

Jisung smiles sadly, apologetically. “You know, one day you’ll wake up and realize that he wasn’t shit. And until then it’s going to hurt, and I can’t tell you that it’ll be soon. Everyone grieves in their own time. But I promise you that one day you won’t care about him anymore.”

A lone tear rolls on your cheek this time. “I just wish I could stop seeing him altogether. But I can’t with dance practice twice a week.”

Jisung grabs your hand, thumb drawing soothing circle on your skin. “You don’t have to stay in the crew if it hurts you too much, you know?”

“I have to,” you say, shaking your head. “It’s all I have.”

He nods, slowly. “You’re strong, Y/n. I’ve seen you go through things you never should have had to go through. If there’s someone that can do it, it’s you.”

It’s your turn to smile sadly. “One day it won’t hurt anymore, right?”

“One day it won’t hurt anymore.”

Friday, August 24th

                Jungkook doesn’t think he has slept at all. All he has been picturing since he lied down last night is you kissing Jimin. Jimin kissing you. It’s burned into his eyelids at this point, and whenever he closes his eyes it’s all he can see.

He has no right feeling this way about it. Especially not as Laura is sleeping next to him, wearing nothing but one of his shirts because she forgot to bring some clothes to sleep over.

He feels selfish and he doesn’t like it. You’re allowed to move on too – after all, he moved on weeks ago. And it’s been easier than he thought it’d be, to be with Laura. Laura’s heart is simple and straightforward, and he’s never once doubted that she cares about him.

Maybe they aren’t in love love yet, but these things take time, don’t they?

The sun is rising outside. It’s painting his room in shades of gray, though gold has been chasing the bleakness away from the spot where it hits the panes of his window. He drew the curtains shut last night, but he didn’t draw them all the way shut it seems, because there’s a rectangle of melted gold on the wall of his room. He’s been looking at it as it progresses along the wall, and it’s about to hit the monitor of his PC set-up soon.

He sighs, running a hand over his features. His hand is shaking a little, from the sleep deprivation he presumes, and he puts it back down next to him. Laura is cuddled up by his side, but he hasn’t found the strength in him to hold her through the night.

He’s aching. Something settled deep down in his bones and it’s been aching all night.

All he wishes is for you to move on. He didn’t realize until last night that he would have to witness it, and he reckons he’s been brandishing his relationship into your face for weeks now. Voluntarily or not, but the existence of Laura has been a constant reminder to him whenever he’s seen you at dance practice.

The times you show up now, that is. Because you don’t come often anymore, and no one has given you shit for it. No one has given shit to Jungkook either. As a matter of fact, he feels like people don’t care at all. And it’s strange: the way that it felt with you was so strong he expected the whole universe to shake from him choosing not to pursue a relationship with you. But it seems you are the two only affected components, and he reckons these days he doesn’t know if he’s affected at all anymore.

That is a lie. Sleep evading him all night is proof enough of that.

Figuring that he’s not going to fall asleep anytime soon, Jungkook decides to get up. He makes little to no noise as he slides from under the comforter, and he puts on a pair of athletic shorts, a t-shirt and some slippers before he rises from the bed to walk out of his room. He looks back at Laura where she’s lying before getting out of the room: her hair is a golden halo around her head, and she still looks like the sun personified.

But Jungkook has always been more of a night person, hasn’t he?

He sighs once more, before sliding out of his room. He makes his way to the kitchen, slowly, wincing a little at the ever-present pain in his leg. It hasn’t been too bad lately, though it’s still there, a constant reminder that he’ll never be whole again.

To his surprise, Jimin is eating a bowl of cereal when Jungkook walks in the kitchen, and they both freeze as they exchange a look. Jimin looks tired, like he didn’t sleep either, and the purple bags under his eyes make Jungkook wonder about what happened between you and Jimin last night.

Are you asleep in Jimin’s bed, the way that Laura is asleep in his?

“Morning,” Jimin says, breaking the silence that’s been building up with tension.

Jungkook worries at his piercing, nodding his head curtly. “Morning,” he replies, and he finishes walking into the kitchen, making his way to the cupboard where the bowls are. He grabs a bowl for himself, before pouring some cereals in it.

As much as it feels awkward to do so, he sits next to Jimin at the table after having grabbed a spoon, adding milk into his bowl until he reckons his breakfast is ready. He dives the spoon in, taking a big bite as he tries to avoid Jimin’s gaze on his profile.

“Couldn’t sleep?” Jimin asks.

Jungkook swallows his bite, before throwing a side glance at Jimin. “Not really, yeah.”

Jimin sighs, sitting back in his chair as he folds his arms on his chest. “Something troubling you?”

It’s not much that it’s troubling him, it’s more that whenever his heart beats it hurts in his chest. But Jungkook doesn’t know how to say that to Jimin, so he settles on, “I guess so? You don’t look like you’ve slept much either.”

“Yeah,” Jimin says before chucking. “I was actually heading to bed, I gamed all night long.”

“Bruh,” Jungkook lets out, and they share a small, friendly laugh that makes Jungkook think maybe he and Jimin are fine.

He really hopes so, because he can’t lose the friendship the way he lost Taehyung’s. Not that he really lost Taehyung, but the months of animosity between them have created a wedge that they haven’t really been able to overcome. At least now they can talk and chill without being at each other’s throat, but it’s still not the way that it was before the accident.

Jungkook doesn’t think it’ll ever be the way that it was before the accident.

“I thought…” he trails off, and a frown moves on his features. Jimin just waits patiently for Jungkook to say more. “I thought you and Y/n left the bar together.”

Jimin’s lips are stretched thin as Jungkook glances at him. “She couldn’t.”

“What do you mean?” Jungkook asks, a little too quick for it to be normal.

Jimin sighs, wetting his lips. “You know exactly what I mean, Kook.”

Maybe he does, but some selfish part of him still wants to hear it. Perhaps because it’ll hurt, and it’ll materialize the pain into something he can actually glare at.

“Do I?”

Jimin chuckles. It’s bitter, angry, and Jungkook even thinks it might be jealous. “She’s in love with you, bro.”

Jungkook was right. It does hurt. No one ever said it right to his face, but he knows you have feelings for him. He was there under the stars that night, when the universe shifted. And he hates that he broke your heart, hates that he probably keeps on breaking it every day.

He can’t blame you for choosing not to attend all the dance practices now. He can’t blame you for how you’ve clearly been avoiding him, and he reckons he’s been avoiding you too. But the rare times that you are in the same room, he can’t lie and say he doesn’t see the sadness behind your eyes. And if the others see it too, they have been too good at pretending that they don’t.

Jo chooses this moment to walk in, and Jungkook finds he doesn’t know what to reply to Jimin. He doesn’t like lying, so he can’t say that it’s not true. Everyone knows you’re in love with him, and everyone knows that he’s dating someone else.

“Morning,” Jo says after a few seconds of evaluating the tension in the room. She probably decided that she needs to do something about it, because she adds, “You two look like shit.”

The joke falls flat, and Jungkook just looks at her for a time. Jimin eventually just chuckles, shaking his head slightly as he gets up. He picks up his bowl and spoon, before bringing them to the sink.

He’s rinsing them when he says, “I haven’t slept yet, and I’m about to go pass the fuck out”.

Jo laughs a little, and she moves towards the coffee machine. A moment later the kitchen fills with the sounds of coffee getting brewed, and Jungkook turns to glance at Jo. “Can I have one too?”

She nods her head, absentmindedly, glancing once between him and Jimin. It’s like she’s telling him something, and Jungkook just shrugs his shoulders as if to say he doesn’t know, or maybe he doesn’t care.

Which is another lie, because he knows and he cares.

“Good night,” Jimin says to no one in particular after he’s finished rinsing his bowl and spoon. He waves at them, and a second later he’s walked out of the kitchen, and Jungkook listens to his receding step until he can’t hear him anymore.

“Did you guys fight?” Jo asks, carefully, as if she’s aware it might be a sensitive subject.

Jungkook plays with his piercing a little, before shrugging his shoulders. “Not really.”

“You look upset.”

He is. The worst part is that he really is upset, and he shouldn’t be, because Laura is sleeping in his bed upstairs, unaware that his heart is aching for another.

“Yeah.” He doesn’t know what else to say. Jo knows that he too had feelings for you once, and the way his heart is aching makes him think that maybe the feelings are still there, now that the embarrassment from that night at the cottage and your reaction to it has passed.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

The coffee is ready before Jungkook replies. Jo is putting down a steaming cup in front of him when Jungkook finds the strength to speak. “I don’t really know what to say. I don’t think I should be upset right now. Like…” he trails off, eyes following the cloud of steam that lazily moves up from the black coffee. “It’s not okay for me to feel like this considering I am probably the reason why everything happened this way.”

Jo sits down across from him, hands wrapped around her mug. She tilts her head to the side, remaining silent for a little too long for Jungkook’s liking. “You feel haunted.”

He does. And he’s not surprised that she knows, because Jo is that kind of girl. She notices everything, understands people better than they understand themselves sometimes. Or at least that’s what she is to Jungkook, and he’s pretty sure that’s what attracted Taehyung to her in the first place.

“I guess so,” he agrees, but he doesn’t say anything else.

Jo lets him sit in his silence for a time, and he’s adding milk to his cup of coffee when she says, “You’re allowed to feel this way”.

He clenches his jaw, eyes stubbornly staying on his coffee as he puts the milk down. “It’s unfair for Laura.”

“Just for Laura?”

He wants to hate Jo for saying it like that, because he knows it’s unfair for you too. For himself, of course, but mostly for you. Because he never let you say what you wanted to say that night at the studio. And all night tonight he’s been wondering if you were going to confess your feelings to him. He was so blinded by his anger and embarrassment then, that he didn’t even think to listen to you.

He wonders where you’d be standing if he had actually listened to you. Though he reckons he knew. He didn’t need you to say it for him to know. And he still made the decision to be with Laura instead.

“It’s unfair for everyone implied in the situation,” he finally chooses to say.

“Life is that way,” Jo says wisely, shrugging her shoulders. She takes a small sip of coffee, though Jungkook is pretty sure it’s still too hot to be actually drunk. “Y/n liked you, you liked her, and you both were too proud.”

It sounds like an accusation, and a few days ago Jungkook would have bitten back. But on this early morning he only agrees. So he shrugs his shoulders, before saying, “Liking someone is not always enough”.

“Right.” Jo looks down at her mug, and then her eyes slide to where Jungkook’s been mindlessly playing with his cereal. “Do you regret it?”

He shrugs. “You’d have asked that question yesterday and I would have said no.”

“What about today?”

He doesn’t want to say it. But he does regret it. He regrets that he got so upset over you saying what you did that night. Because in the grand scheme of things, he’s not even sure it mattered. It was true, in some way. You never should have slept together that night. It made things far too concrete for them to be ignored, and your complicated heart chose the easy way out at first.

He can’t blame you, because had the roles been reversed he would have done the same thing. But he regrets the way his pride pushed you away, until his heart believed that he was actually doing the right thing by choosing to be with Laura. Now there’s a war between his mind and his heart, because his mind is at peace with his decision, but his heart is aching.

“I don’t know how to reply,” he admits. “I’d say yes I do regret it. But no, I wouldn’t change things.”

Jo slowly nods her head. She looks sad, and he remembers that she is your friend now. She is your friend and she hates Laura. Or maybe she just hates what Laura is to him.

They don’t speak much after that, and Jungkook reckons maybe the turmoil inside of him is exaggerated. Maybe he’s just upset because it was Jimin that you were kissing. Maybe he doesn’t actually care all that much.

He never knew he could be such a liar.

*****

                You watch your face on the screen, as the Facetime call rings on and on. You have planned this call for a while now, but you’re starting to think maybe your dad forgot.

You can’t really blame him. It’s his birthday, and you can imagine that he’s been busy with his family. It’s also around dinner time, so maybe he’s just stuck at the table unable to answer.

Your thoughts are running wild when the call finally connects, and your father’s smiling face appears on the screen.

“Y/n!” he greets you happily.

He’s wearing a birthday hat that makes him look a little stupid, in your opinion, but he looks so happy you find yourself blinking back tears.

“Happy birthday!” you say.

He immediately notices your unease, and you watch him walking away from wherever he first was. He changes rooms, and the sounds from his birthday celebration vanish as he closes the door behind him.

“Is something wrong?” he asks.

Of course he’d know. He knows you too well, can read you like the back of his hand. Maybe that’s the reason why you haven’t called him since before the weekend at the cottage.

“Just life being life,” you answer, shrugging your shoulders. “How’s your birthday party been going?”

“It’s fun,” he says, cautiously. “We just finished eating dinner.”

You slowly nod, trying to smile but you’re not sure it reaches your eyes. “How’s the family going?”

You see him battling his will to insist on talking about you for a few seconds, but he eventually caves in and tells you about everyone. His new wife started a new job, and she seems like she’s been adapting well. Their son is growing well, and he keeps asking who’s the girl in the picture in the living room. Your dad confirms that it’s a picture of you, and he says that he tells his son it’s his sister.     

At that you do cry a little.

“What’s wrong?” your father immediately enquires, concern laced with his voice.

“It’s just…” you trail off, shrugging your shoulders. “I’ve been feeling like shit for a while. And I really miss you.”

“Oh, Y/n… Come to California. You know you don’t have to stay with your mother anymore.”

But you do. You do because your whole life is here, and you don’t want to move away. You want him to come back, but that’s never going to happen, is it?

“I know,” you let out. You dry a tear that’s rolled on your cheek. “But I like it here.”

He nods. “What’s the matter?”

“Mom,” you admit. “And there’s a guy.”

You tell your father about Jungkook. He remembers him this time around, and he looks a little uncomfortable when you mention that you slept with Jungkook. But you’ve been needing to confide in a parental figure for a while now, and though you talked to Jisung last night, he isn’t your father. When you’re done talking, your father remains silent for a while, as if he’s thinking about everything that you said.

“I’m really sorry,” he eventually says. “I know it’s useless for me to say, but getting your heart broken always sucks.”

And he knows. Your mom ripped his heart from his chest, poured gasoline on it and then lit it on fire.

“I’m trying to be positive, to tell myself that it wouldn’t have worked out anyway, but it still sucks.”

“I know,” your dad gently says, nodding his head. “You should go downstairs, grab your mother’s ugly china and break it.”

The suggestion makes your heart pause in your chest, and then you start laughing. You laugh because he sounded so serious, and he used to tell you that whenever you were upset when you were a kid. He said that you needed to wait until you were really hurting, and then that breaking it would make you feel better.

Needless to say, your mother always scolded him for saying that, and scolded you after for good measure.

“Oh, I miss you so much,” you say when your laughter recedes. “You know, I think I’ll visit during the holidays. I know it’s far but I can’t before then…”

“You’d be most welcome,” he assures you. “And until then remember that it’s okay for a heart to break. But you have to allow yourself to heal too.”

His words stay with you for the rest of the evening, and you think maybe he’s right. Maybe you haven’t really allowed yourself to heal yet, because sitting in the hurt was more comfortable. Like it was a comfort zone of some sort, and you reckon it might have been. Because growing up you were often hurt by your mother, so the emotions feel familiar.

Them being familiar doesn’t mean that you should cling to them though. So, before you go to bed that night, you grab your phone, move to your messaging app, and scroll down to Jungkook’s conversation. You’re itching to reread everything again, but this time you choose your own peace of mind instead of all the what-ifs that have been haunting you. You take a deep breath to steel yourself, and then you delete the conversation.

A few seconds later you delete his number too.

Prev | Next

☆☆☆☆☆

Yeahhh lots of angst again. But I promise that it is soon going to get better! What did we think of this one?

All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts 2023. Do not copy, repost or translate.

Taglist (strike-through means dumblr is not letting me tag you my bad):

@chimchimmarie | @pamzn | @sugaluvmyg | @tearyjjeon | @jkclouds | @libra04 | @parkinglot-nights | @ggukieasy | @omnomnomtron | @jichimx | @synnfulqt | @leedoesntknaur | @pornichet | @melodiesforari | @oopscoop | @nadzzzblog | @amylouisecullen | @sunwooful | @parkethereal | @jeonhvvrs | @daisies-and-dandelionpuffs | @bloopkook

[jingerhead]

Would love to see Andreil #5 for the specific prompt thingy, I can sense it would be unhinged

Pls this one is so unhinged I'm dying what do I even do for this one (TW: brief mentions of torture)

5 - verified purchase reviewer on multipack of toy horses that only says THE RED ONES TASTE THE BEST and customer service agent going hello???? enemies to lovers nightmare 

Andrew had been staring at his computer screen long enough for his eyes to start watering. He wasn't sure what to do with what he was looking at, despite knowing he had to reach out to the user that had left an...unsettling review on a multipack of small toy horses. Children's toys. Some angry mother was going to call customer support with a strong complaint about said review if he didn't get rid of it.

Alex Whocares left the following review:

☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ (five stars)

THE RED ONES TASTE THE BEST

It was probably someone playing a prank, but Andrew had to respond to it anyway, because apparently this was his job. He finally managed to get his body to move, looking up this 'Alex Whocares' in their customer database and finding the email he'd signed up with. He then wrote an email and sent it quickly, finally looking away from the review.

________

Mr. Whocares,

On behalf of our company, we would like to thank you for your five star review on the multipack of rainbow toy horses, we are glad you enjoyed our product! However, we noticed in your review you mentioned consuming our product, and we'd like to remind you that our children's toys products are not meant for consumption. On the package, it specifically states that the multipack of rainbow toy horses is only meant for children ages three and up. We advise you to keep our products away from anyone who might consume them and to seek medical attention immediately if they are consumed.

Regards,

A. Minyard

Customer Service

_________

With that email sent, Andrew promptly decided to take a break, locking his computer and heading to the break room to take some of the free cookies and make a new cup of coffee. When he finished and sat back down at his computer he went back to work.

About an hour later, he got an email.

________

A. Minyard,

On behalf of myself, I'd like to apologize and explain my reasons for the review I left. I'm not sorry for leaving the review I did, I stand by it, but I'm sorry for worrying you so much you personally reached out to make sure I seek medical attention after eating the rainbow horses.

Recently I was kidnapped by my serial killer father and while I was in the car his stupid little henchmen and woman tortured me with the cigarette lighter. At one point she dropped it and it landed on the seat and would've burned my thigh if it wasn't for the glorious multipack of rainbow horses I'd stuffed in my pocket.

(I'd bought them for my friend's baby shower 'cause I figured a baby would enjoy playing with them but I now see that would've been a mistake, no baby is born three years old! How silly of me!)

That amazing multipack of rainbow horses saved me a little more pain than I was already in and by the time we arrived at my father's house the plastic the little horses are made of had melted a bit. I was stuffed into the basement where I'd watched him kill a man once and was locked down there for days. Thankfully there was a sink down there, so I had water, but I was hungry and there wasn't any food.

Until I remembered the multipack of rainbow horses, of course!

I left them near the furnace and let the plastic soften enough so that I could eat them. The red ones indeed tasted the best out of them all. I didn't feel so good after eating them though which is probably why you guys have that label on the toys in the first place. Thankfully, the FBI showed up and got me to the hospital and they pumped my stomach.

I do not recommend that experience.

I just got back home and I'm still recovering but I'm so glad that you saw my unhinged review I left while I was high on pain meds and thought to reach out to me. That's just so thoughtful of you, thank you so much. I'm doing a lot better now, thanks for asking.

Also my name isn't Alex anymore, sorry for the confusion.

Neil Abram Josten

P.S. You really like the word 'consumed' huh?

__________

Andrew promptly locked his computer again and went to get another coffee. He'd need it to reply to that email.

[i-arch-my-backula]

Halloween ends review

I'm gonna start doing reviews for movies sometimes if I can collect my thoughts on them well enough. Spoilers are under the cut but overall the movie is a 6/10 as a Halloween movie and a 7/10 as a movie in general.

My biggest problem with it is how little Michael is in the movie. I came to see Halloween and I wanted to get my 60 year old maybe demon man who kills people violently. But Corey was a fun character too. I really felt bad for him because I know how it feels to cause a major accident and have people believe you're like a Satan worshiping baby murderer.

It's also interesting to explore the theme Laurie talks about how evil doesn't leave it takes a different form. Which ties into my belief that bigotry doesn't leave it just evolves but that's not really tied into anything about this movie. Michael sparring Corey also adds a dimention to him that the OG Michael never got. Unlike with RZ Michael we never get to see what lead up to him killing his sister and we can infer that Loomis wasn't the best doctor for Michael but we all we've seen him as is some murder machine who kills almost anyone he comes across.

But with him sparring Corey and even helping him kill people it brings in some interesting questions. Why would Michael spare Corey? Did he spare him because he know he was growing old and he wanted someone to carry on being him? Did gain some kind of respect for Corey when he escaped and killed that homeless man. It was also interesting to see how Corey's mask when he did his first kill under Michael's wing was similar to the clown mask Michael wore when he killed his sister. It just brings more dimention to Michael which I wish we got to see more of because like I said he was in the movie for like 15 minutes all together and five of those minutes was him dying basically.

Which brings me to the gore. Halloween ends isn't a super gorey film. Yes it has more gore than the original Halloween but it's not like Rob Zombies Halloween. It's mostly bloody but the best gore is with the killing of the radio dj and Michael's own death. Speaking of Michael's death they went above and beyond with it. I thought Jason's death in Friday part four was graphic well Michael's just takes the cake. Like it's bordering on ridiculous how much effort they put into killing him. I think the hammering knives into his hands and slitting his throat would have been enough but like slitting his wrists then throwing him in a industrial metal chipper was something else man. But it's a legandary way to go for one of the OG slashers.

The fight scenes were also great in my opinion. Laurie still has that fight left in her from the other movies and I think the stunt actors did a great job with the fighting.

Onto other characters. Allyson wasn't the best kinda character. I thought she was kinda a sterotypical bland final girl with a bit more dimention than other girls in other slasher movies. Her actress was good in the movie, it's not the acting that's bad it's more just like how they wrote her.

Jamie was amazing as Laurie. I'm glad to see her finally not living in fear of Michael. We never really get to see final girls decades after their encounters with slashers and it's interesting to see her growth over the movies from living in complete fear and her life kind of revolving around Michael to her healing and growing as a person. She knows Michael is still out there but her fear doesn't rule her anymore and I love that for her. She's a great part of the movie and honestly makes me like the movie more. Like I said earlier she still has that survival training in her and she's still a smart woman so her faking killing herself was smart and in character.

Again to talk about Corey you can see from the start that he has the potential to become someone like Michael after the kids death. His first two kills were either an accident or in self defense. But we can see his obsessive nature and Michael's influance grow on him throughout the movie. We get good modivation for his kills. Officer Mulany was being an asshole to Allyson who Corey is established to be interested in. He killed the doctor and nurse who was rude to him and Allyson again and with the teens who have constantly messed with him throughout the movie. Also with his verbally and emotionally abusive mother.

Just some thoughts I have about the movie.

[yoomiii123]

Loving your HC’s btw about Jalice maybe spending some time alone after the Volturi face-off, just recuperating and taking a moment to be thankful they’re still both alive and Alice is not under Aro’s control…for now..do you imagine they’d meet up with Peter and Charlotte again on their travels? I HC that obviously Peter feels indebt towards Jasper for saving P/C from the Southern Wars but after the face-off with the Volturi and putting his and Charlotte’s lives at risk he’s like “Ok, Jasper, I think we’re even now” in a sort of comical way 😂

Thanks for the question! I am glad you like the HC of them going on a very well-deserved holiday after BD :-)

Yes, they absolutely meet Peter and Charlotte again, however this happens at the rear-end of their vacation, since I headcanon them spending most of that time outside the Americas (Peter and Charlotte's usual travel-grounds).

Here's how I headcanon it all went down: They kicked off their vacation with Jasper finally taking Alice on that honeymoon to Paris, which she always wanted (they didn't go after their wedding because Jasper wasn't good enough around people yet and Alice didn't really want to leave the Cullens after just having become part of the family). While he was concerned about the Volturi, Jasper figured that mainland Europe would probably never be safer again, since the Volturi had just returned to Volterra and needed to deal with the aftermath of the confrontation / come up with a new plan. However, they still traveled under false names, just to be sure.

After that initial two weeks in Paris, Alice and Jasper then moved east towards Russia and the Asian continent. They hadn't done a lot of travelling there previously and while this provided them with just the right amount of secluded wilderness and livestock they needed, it also gave Jasper the chance to investigate whether this was a suitable destination to hide, if he ever had to take Alice and run again. Alice didn't appreciate that part of their itinerary too much because she didn't want to think about leaving the Cullens (again) but she went along willingly, knowing that having a plan would calm Jasper and make the coming months / years more bearable for both of them.

After a good two to three months of travelling, they finally returned to the Americas, where they met up with Peter and Charlotte. This is partly due to Jasper wanting to review his plan with Peter, but also because they didn't get much time to talk during Breaking Dawn and Alice wanted to catch up.

Regarding your headcanon of Peter comically saying that they were even now: I can totally see Peter say something similar like this, however it would be more along the lines of "I'm still coming up with ideas on how to cash in that favour you owe me" in my head. The 'score' between Peter and Jasper is an interesting thing which I headcanon they do not have the same view on.

For Jasper, whatever debt Peter felt he owed him was settled the moment he went back to get him from Maria. If it were up to him, he still owed Peter for kickstarting the events that led him to Alice. Therefore, him asking them to witness for the Cullens was a favour and Jasper made it very clear that he would owe them one. He also told Peter that he did not want him to risk his life again and that they should get out if things got too dicey. Peter, on the other hand, still felt somewhat indebted to Jasper because he saw the immense deterioration in Jasper's metal health between the time he and Charlotte left and the time he went back for him. He blamed himself for not going back earlier and save his brother from the pain those five years caused him. This is why, when the Cullens asked them to fight, Peter said that they were undecided despite Jasper's clear instructions to get out. This was also the reason why Charlotte was so sour, when he said that. In her head, it was clear: "Jasper gave you an out, take it you pigheaded fool. We don't owe them anything." So, after the events of Breaking Dawn, in Jasper's head he owes Peter one and in Peter's head they just are one step closer to being even. However, in their conversations, Peter would bring up Jasper owing him one as comic relief to gloss over the fact that he ignored his plea to get out and still felt indebted to him (something he knows would weigh on Jasper).

I think that the dissonance between Jasper and Peter's interpretation of their 'scores' is a key factor of their realtionship. It's the main reason for why Peter, after almost seven decades, still jumps at Jasper's request and will basically do anything he asked, despite Charlotte being opposed sometimes. Jasper and Peter's relationship is very similar to those between the wounded soldier and the soldier who carried him to safety—only that both of them think, they were the wounded ones.

[mctherofdragons]

A Sanctuary Heart | 3 | SR

summary / after her abusive husband lands her in the intensive care unit, y/n changes her identity and moves as far away as possible. upon starting her new life, she meets dr.spencer reid and his son, maddox, when she begins her job as a teacher. but can she keep herself safe and keep up the facade with spencer? can she be safe at all?

pairing / spencer reid x fem!reader

warnings / slowburn romance, fluff, angst, marriage, trauma, domestic violence/abuse, dad!spencer, wheelchair use, paralysis, injury, ptsd flashbacks, car accident/serious injury, bullying, mention of ableism, a singular mention of god.

important links / series masterlist + domestic violence resources

authors note / i absolutely adored writing this chapter, omg. we get more of spencer and maddox's backstory. and things start to get a little more exciting as the rest of the team makes their first appearance! thank you all for the great feedback so far, i'm so glad you're enjoying the series. also my tags are not working, so reblogs on this chapter would be insanely appreciated. Flashbacks are in italics!

Seeing the blood on your hand, Spencer instinctively reached out to grab your wrist gently. You snatched your hand back, bringing yourself up to your feet, wobbling. You grabbed your bag, wrapping your hand in your scarf that you had managed to take off in the cool October night.“Ivy,” he said the moniker one more time and you felt your insides reel once more.

‘I’m a liar, Dr. Reid, I wish you knew,’ you thought to yourself, stumbling to search for your keys under the warm glow of the moon.

“I have to go. Thank you for dinner,” you contended, making your way out of the side gate. Spencer watched in confusion as you made your way out quickly. He figured he ought to chose his battles, not wanting to startle you by following after you.

Once you were safe inside your car, you sat in the driver’s seat, hands gripping onto the steering wheel for dear life. You felt a sharp combination of embarrassment and frustration. You wanted the flit of light that came from the possibility of new love. But instead, the one before had taken everything from you. Even now, all these miles and a new name away, he was pulling you away from those little flickers of brilliance and back into the darkness of yourself.

_____________________________

2 years earlier.

“Maddox,” Spencer whispered, feeling his heavy eyelids open just slightly. He was disoriented, noticing that the once right-side-up roadway was now upside down instead. The loud blaring of the horn was constant. It sent a piercing sound into Spencer’s ears and head, which caused him to wince. “Maddox.”

Spencer tried to turn, but he couldn’t move. Something had him pinned in the driver’s seat. He looked into the review mirror, which by grace alone wasn’t entirely broken. Maddox was slumped in his car seat, blood trickling down onto his Toy Story tee shirt. Spencer let out a weak gasp, trying again with no avail to move.

Spencer noticed how cold it was. It had been snowing all night, and Spencer wasn’t sure how long they had been where they are now. The snow had fallen through the shattered glass, tiny flakes gathering anywhere they could.

Using all of his strength, he turned his head to his wife. Her eyes were half shut, a trickle of crimson come from her mouth.

“Baby,” Spencer whispered. “Are you alright?”

She began to speak, but began to sputter, her lungs sounding flooded. Her hand curled and uncurled, and Spencer could barely reach it. He was able to hold onto her fingertips with his. They felt ice-cold like she was already three steps into Eternity. Spencer knew that type of frigid touch. He had come in content with it a million times, and the person on the other end was never living.

“D-don’t talk, baby. Okay? The ambulance is coming. Do you hear them? We’re going to be okay.”

Spencer could hear the medics somewhere far off in the distance. The repeated echo of the sirens sounded like a band of angels to him. Spencer Reid admittedly didn’t believe in the Judeo-Christian God. He wasn’t sure what he gave credence to, in fact. But at that moment, inverted in the shattered glass, surrounded by the labored breathing of his dying wife...he prayed.

________________________________

Spencer walked into the Bureau, adjusting the brown satchel on his shoulder. His brow looked furrowed as he sipped from his paper coffee cup. He couldn’t stop thinking about the way you left, trying to profile what exactly had gone wrong between the Merlot and you rushing out of his backyard.

“Penny for your thoughts?,” Emily piqued as Spencer sat down, tossing his bag onto his desk. Spencer let out an exasperating sigh, taking another drink of his coffee.

“Just trying to figure someone out.”

“Oh, oh, oh. Is this a lady someone?,” Derek queried, wiggling his eyebrows. He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning onto Spencer’s desk with a sparkling grin.

“Maybe.”

Spencer felt himself smiling despite his best efforts. Emily opened her mouth in surprise, giving Derek a playful shove.

“I told you he would get back out there, Morgan!”

Spencer smiled. “Yeah, she’s sweet. I just...don’t know if I’m ready yet.”

That morning, Spencer had put on his wedding band. He still did it when he was scared, or nervous, or needing to feel close to her. He would feel the cool metal atop his finger and feel less alone. For a brief moment when the metallic touched his skin, he could pretend she was still here.

Derek gave Spencer’s shoulder a supportive squeeze.

“I hope you know me and Prentiss are just messing with you. We care about you, kid. We know these past two years have been hell for you. Just want you to be happy.”

“Yeah…I appreciate that. I just…,” Spencer paused, bringing his hands up as he spoke, as was so akin to him. His lip curled into the smallest smile. “Seeing this girl interact with Maddox. She...loves him for him..already?”

“Maddox is a great kid, Reid.”

“I know. I just don’t want her to find out---”

Spencer’s sentence was cut off by Hotch appeared, letting everyone know they had a case and to meet for Round Table. Spencer quickly shot a text to Maddox’s home health nurse, letting her know he’d need coverage for a few days.

________________________________

You sat in the front of your classroom, your eyes scanning from the test in front of you to the answer key. The students were working on a Social Studies project in small groups. Their task was to read a short story about colonial times and fill out a short worksheet. If they finished early they were permitted to color, which most of the children thoroughly enjoyed.

“Maddox can’t use crayons,” you heard a small voice snicker. You raised your eyebrow, hoping it wasn’t harmful, and rather just an observation.

You heard another child sling a slur at Maddox, who was sitting quietly with his aide, trying to ignore them. But as you looked up, you saw Maddox’s tiny bottom lip begin to wobble. One of the children picked up a crayon and threw it at Maddox, hitting him in the shoulder.

“He can’t even feel that! My dad said that’s why he’s in a wheelchair,” the bully jeered again, high-fiving his friend.

You stood up with a loud squeak of your chair against the linoleum floor.

“You two. Principals office. Now.”

The rest of the class erupted in a chorus of childish ‘ooo’s. You clapped your hands together - your universal signal to quiet down.

“I did not ask for comments from the audience,” you scolded. The children settled down, going back to their work, whispering amongst one another.

“Maddox, come talk to me in the hallway,” you offered. Tears were rolling down Maddox’s cheeks. His aide reached over with a tissue to wipe them, but he turned his face away, one of the only ways he could physically set a boundary.

Maddox’s aide helped him into the hallway and then left the two of you alone. You sat down on one of the small, metal benches in the hallway. At this angle, you were about Maddox’s height. He was blubbering, trying to take deep breaths as more tears came. You pulled a small, clean, cloth handkerchief from your pocket. He let you dab his cheeks, giving him a gentle click of the tongue.

“Buddy, do you want to talk about it?”

“T-they’re so m..m..mean to me,” he whimpered, closing his eyes as more tears fell. “And, and, and I can’t play with them even, that’s why. I can’t do anything!”

You nodded empathetically, gently catching more of Maddox’s tears.

“I hate school! My daddy wants me to like school. It’s all he talks about. I hate him!”

“Maddox,” you softly redirected. “That’s not very nice. You don’t hate your dad.”

Maddox looked a deep breath. You smiled, knowing Spencer must have taught him to do that when he was upset.

“You’re right. But I’m sad, and I wanna go home.”

You sighed, reaching up to blot the little bit of redness still present on Maddox’s cheeks. You adjusted his glasses, moving some of his curly brown hair from underneath the metal.

“Just a few more hours, okay? We have library at the end of the day.”

Maddox’s face lit up, his apple cheeks glowing beneath the rims of his glasses. “Library!”

“Yes, and just for this week, you can take home two books.”

______________________________

Spencer felt distracted the entire flight to Vermont. He knew he was going to be far away for a while, and that Maddox wouldn’t know until he got out of school for the day. The agent detested when he had to leave without Maddox knowing in advance, but it was usually impossible given the nature of things. Thankfully, Reid had a good setup of support through healthcare and respite so Maddox never went without someone to care for him.

Then, there was you. He couldn’t stop thinking about your reaction. He had seen it before in abuse victims. The way you flinched when he moved too fast, the apologizing like your life depended on it, even the way you looked at him with pleading eyes, desperate to avoid a blow. He bridged his fingers together, thinking to himself for a moment.

With that, he stood up, making his way to the back of the plane. He unlocked his phone while he chewed his fingernail with his free hand. Before he knew it, he was calling Garcia.

“Penelope. Hey, I need a favor. A personal one. If you could keep it between us, that would be great.”

“Anything for you, my precious string bean.”

Spencer laughed. “I need you to get all the information you can on someone. Ivy Porter.”

“Ivy Porter. That’s like a movie star name. What did she do?”

“Um..nothing, I don’t think. Just call me when you’ve got something, and email me everything you find.”

“You got it. Every in and out of Ms. Ivy Porter coming to you soon. Be safe. Talk soon.”

With that, Penelope clicked off of the call. Spencer sat back down, anxiously waiting for whatever information Penelope could find about you.

___________

series/criminal minds taglist: @hufflepuffhaze @omghufflepuff @txtdreamss @rainbows-dreams @bvttercupbby @k-k0129 @rexit-mo @britishspidey @graciehams @manuosorioh @shemarmooresfedora @big-galaxy-chaos @thatoneszesty13 @ssavanessa22 @awritingtree @sweetandsunny​ @rainsong01 @kuolonsyoja @taralewiz @bluelittleblackgirl @asexual-booknerd @the-wolfie

[noveltyreads]

Seoulmates by Susan Lee Book Review

ARC kindly provided by the publisher via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review

If you need a happiness boost, you have to read Seoulmates.

I absolutely devoured this book from start to finish. It was light, fluffy, absolutely readable and I found myself falling deeper and deeper in love with it with every page. It had everything I wanted: a summer romance, friends to lovers, angsty teenage main character and soft, actor love interest who honestly just needed a hug. This book has been on my to-watch list of 2022 and when I managed to get the ARC of it on NetGalley, I practically screamed in delight. 

Seoulmates follows main character Hannah whose boyfriend just broke up with her, claiming they have nothing in common. When Hannah's childhood best friend, and now up and coming K-Drama actor, Jacob Kim comes back from South Korea, Hannah uses his knowledge to aid her in getting Nate to be with her again. What Hannah leaves out of the equation is her developing feelings for Jacob as they uncover what really went wrong that caused a rift in their friendship previously. 

This book is told in two perspectives: Hannah's and Jacob's. I think this worked perfectly with the story and it allowed us to get further glimpses into their characters including their vulnerabilities and their desire, ultimately, to be loved. Hannah was trying to fit in with her American friends thinking that in order to do that, she needed to shut out the Korean part of her Korean-American identity. This in turn made Nate and his friends drift away from her, making the very thing Hannah was shunning out the thing that set her apart from the others. You could see the toll this took on Hannah and how underneath that angsty girl facade, there was a girl who just felt scared, sad and vulnerable. I could see how she just wanted to feel okay again and how she felt like in order to do that, she needed to prove herself worthy of Nate's affections. In the end, I'm glad she developed on her self-worth and self-esteem, realising that maybe things would never have worked out with him to begin with. 

Jacob on the other hand was seemingly living a dazzled life in South Korea but the truth was far from it. He was an actor in a popular new K-Drama show which just got renewed for a second season. After a PR disaster, his management tells him to take a holiday while they deal with the problem. Jacob and his mum and sister decide to head back to San Diego for the first time in years. While Jacob questions his future on a TV show with restrictive rules on what he can and can't do, he starts to feel a little bit stressed from the pressure his manager and co-star put on him, telling him he's not good enough at his job. Eager to take a break, Jacob tries getting as far away from the spotlight as possible with the company telling him not to bring any attention to himself. Jacob's internal struggle was with being good enough for other people and you could see this conflict between what he loved doing (acting) and the expectations others had on him to be up to par. 

I loved how both character's flaws were really shown in this book and I think that's why I found I could relate to the characters as much as I did. Hannah was angsty but you could see how much she cared especially with how she wanted to become an immunologist to help people with allergic reactions after seeing how it affected someone she knew. While she tried hiding it on the inside, you could see past the facade and I liked how the book dealt with breaking down those shields Hannah put up around herself. Jacob was slightly more transparent in my opinion, but I loved seeing how gentle he was with Hannah and his compassionate and warm nature. 

On top of the characterisation, I really liked the family dynamics between the Cho's and the Kim's. I love books with family at heart and great banter and it makes me so happy when said family dynamics also come with home-made food and cooking. This book made me hungry for Korean food so my recommendation is to have a few snacks on hand while reading this. 

All in all, this book made me happy, with cute, relatable characters and deep themes. Minus, the vomiting scene at the start, this book, to me, is close to five stars. 

ACTUAL RATING: 4.7 STARS 

[xclusivrat]

DOCTOR

yeah i wish

This is a recap of the night I lost my virginity, to the sexiest man alive.

His name was Leo, well at least I remember that far? He was super tall, taller than six foot by just a bit. His voice was raspy and cool, you kind of wanted to eat it; his moans and grunts were even better ⸺ enough to make you cum alone. His demeanour remained the same the whole night, laid back but temptive and flirty. He was also a smart dresser, I didn't  know if that was because of the event we were attending but it was still good. I wonder if he has clothing tailor made, he seemed wealthy.

$$$

I was attending a function for my company (along with a few others) and his hospital. I am a secretary so I was quite busy that whole evening, running around to make sure everything is in order and that my boss met the people he needed to meet. The function was to bring forth "a bright future"

I don't know I found it all to be a bit dumb to hold a whole function.

At some point people were proposing already reviewed plans and introducing some commendable people. From the hospital's side, the most commendable was "Dr Paladiknight" (I'm glad I at least remember his last name). He stood upfront on that huge stage, next to their representative.

The representative spoke about his journey on becoming a doctor and what he does for them now. Super kind-hearted man ⸺ free medical service for any patient to come through, he pays for the equipment and such from his payment as a hunter.

He was standing up there all proud and mighty. My heart had begun to beat faster than before the more I stared at him.

Then his eyes met mine, I swear I nearly died right then and there! He wouldn't break eye contact with me and people were starring to notice. My boss next to me even nudged my shoulder, when I turned to him he had a smug look on his face like, "He definitely likes you. Take your chances."

Eventually the propositions were over and people went on to eat, drink and party. I particularly didn't want to drink since I had told myself I was "at work"

My boss told me to lay off but I refused.

I just sat at a lonely high table and stool with a thin champagne glass of water.

Then he came up to me.

That smoking hot doctor came up to me and I nearly choked on my water. He took note of my aspiration and held his arms over his head. I did the same and felt better after a few deep breaths.

"Thank you," I heaved.

"Haha, no problem."

Ohhh, sweet heaven that voice! He'd been silent all night long but in that moment, I actually got to listen to something that'd interest me.

"I am-"

"Yes, Doctor Paladiknight? I know who you are. You were just on stage," he pulled back his lips and nodded.

"Yes, Doctor Paladiknight," his hand was out.

I didn't want to shake it, so I hesitated. But I eventually gave in and touched his lovely skin. It was warm and soft, a bit skinny for somebody quite muscular.

"What's your name?"

I coughed at his interest in me. The nervosity was very annoying at the time cause I behaving like an idiot. I was worried he'd want to leave since I was being so weird but he stayed. He smiled and sat down opposite me.

Damnit

"I hope you don't mind me sitting here."

As if I can tell you to go now.

"My name is y/n. I'm CEO Dwaythar's executive assistant," I pointed to my boss hand-feeding a waiter a strawberry in his drunken state.

"Mm, how is it like being his assistant?"

"It's alright. At events like this though, he's too laid back and foolish. I'm mostly on edge if he's jugging down alcohol like there's no tomorrow!" I muttered.

"Well have you tried to not worry about your boss?"

"I can't ~" I dropped my head, "He could mess up everything we've all worked hard for!"

"Has that ever happened?"

"With my previous boss on multiple occasions, but not Dwaythar," he did a breathy laugh.

"Has it been close to happening with Dwaythasar?" I lightly shook my head.

"Then you don't have anything to worry about. Everyone is done with work. All that's happening now is partying. Just relax," he started slouching and cruised his hands.

"Mm, but-"

"Whether you drink or not, I'm gonna get you a drink to help you wind down," he held his arm out for me to hook on.

I gave my boss one last look and hooked onto the doctor's arm.

He led me to a bar and asked if I drink alcohol or not.

"I do, but only the most basic beer. I haven't tried others," that sentence was just a disaster waiting to happen.

"Okay, then we'll try others together. Let's start off lightly," I wanted to tell him that I didn't plan on trying any others but it couldn't be helped. He'd already ordered a Hachineken and some other whiskey brand.

I instantly grabbed the Hachineken as soon as it was set in front of me. Then he stopped me.

"We start off with whiskey first," then I was handed a shot glass by the bartender.

I gulped down hard and waited for him to pour me the whiskey. I just wanted to leave at that point. Firstly I was too overwhelmed by hotness and charm, then I might've gotten drunk by the time I left and have a hangover the next day.

He poured both our glasses and counted to three. On three we drank and it felt like a stream of radioactive liquid burnt my oesophagus.

We both let out the typical sighs people do after having refreshing drink. To be honest it felt kind of good.

"How was that?" his face already looked dazed.

"It burnt my throat but it felt like being splashed in the face with water. Which was exactly, what I needed."

☠♡☠

Soon the shots got more deadlier and the doses were increasing by the minute. We weren't so dazed as to not be able to walk properly, we were just a bit more open with each other...maybe very more open.

"Wagamama na High Heels"  by Kaoru Akimoto began playing and Leorio immediately grabbed me by my arms and led me to the dance floor.

I got a bit self-conscious since this notable doctor was dancing with this dingy secretary.

He noticed me looking around nervously, and slithered his hands around my waist.

I rapidly turned my head to face him and he was smirking so seductively, I felt a bit tingly in my pussy. I had no idea where to put my hands after he did that and he noticed, so he put them over his damned tall shoulders and moved his back to my waist.

We danced a bit slower than the song goes but I didn't worry about that. I was so in the moment with this man, that I forgot everything and everyone else.

I don't know why, but something in that moment made it seem right to kiss him. I wondered if this was how people felt in movies and TV shows ⸺ you just do it. He wanted to go in for it too, I could tell. From the way he was gradually leaning in closer and teasing me with his hungry looking eyes.

"You want to kiss me don't you, secretary?" I scoffed. He's the one who wanted to kiss me!

"I think it's sort of the opposite."

"Alright fine. You're just so beautiful and-" he sighed and met my lips.

So enchanting. That kiss was amazing! We tongue-fought and he bit my lower lip. I was getting hornier and hornier, then he started smooching my neck. I nearly came right then and there. I pushed him off a bit and checked if people were looking. Oh they were looking, all right!

"Wouldn't you prefer to do this elsewhere?" I asked him quietly.

Then he held my ass, "I think doing this publicly would be a bit more fun~" then he squeezed it.

"Oh my word," I scoffed again, "How lewd."

He shrugged and pulled me to the other side of the floor. It was a two storey building and he decided to take me up into some other room that coincidentally had a bed.

He pushed me down and lurked over me. I felt my breathing getting heavier. Then he spoke, "You a virgin?"

I wanted to lie, "Ye- N-no!"

"Body count?"

"Body count? W-what is that?"

"So you are a virgin?" I gave up at that point. "You wouldn't mind if I check you're endurance down there?"

I didn't want to believe what I was hearing. Was this going to happen so soon?

It was hard to answer since my mind was racing.

"Just do what you want."

He raised a brow then French-kissed me some more. But his hands were doing something else, which was sliding down my body to my leaking vagina.

Damnit

Then he crept into my underwear and continously agitated my clit. It'd been years since I last touched myself, all this work left me so fucking tired for life.

There was so much going on in that moment, that I thought I would die. I was just anticipating the moment he'd finally fuck me, the foreplay would make me cum and I wouldn't be able to continue. Just one orgasm was all I was able take.

He separated the kiss and bit my lower lip again, before taking off my palazzo pants and lifting up my legs to spread them wide open.

"How are you feeling, y/n?" something about him saying my name during that moment made me more excited.

"Pl- please say my name again," he said nothing and I felt something wet touch me down there.

"Ahhh-ha!"

I moaned louder than I had wished. He ran his big warm hands up and down my thighs, which would soon be trembling.

Him licking my clit like some lollipop felt just so wildly satisfying that I can't put it in words. It was like: a hot ass doctor you just met at a function is licking your pussy damn clean.

I continued moaning out of pleasure until he could hear I was coming close, then he stopped.

Is he edging me?

Then as if on cue, "Remember the Time" by Michael Jackson began playing as the Doctor began stripping his suit off. He danced with the song by swaying his body. I unconsciously bit my lip at how sexy he looked.

Once he was done I admired his beautiful physique. Impeccable rock-hard abs, toned arms just an overall fit build.

Then he came forward to my ear and asked, "Are you ready, y/n?" he was going to stick his member inside of me.

"If you say my name again," he moved in front of my face.

"Y/n~"

I propped my arms on his shoulder and he got the message. He went in slow and each gradual feel for his length was a slippery, perfect fit. This was when I realised how long he actually was. I hadn't looked at it as he was stripping since his abs just pulled me in.

He'd gone in completely and pulled out slowly then went in again, increasing the pace with each thrust.

I found myself rolling my eyes back once he had me bouncing like a basketball. He'd unbuttoned my shirt and took off my bra. He was clearly having fun watching my boobs bounce.

Pervert

The sex went on and we were coming close. He showered me with pretty kisses all across my upper body.

I was in utopia I swear, the rest of the world didn't exist in that moment. I didn't want it to end but satisfaction hit us like a flood and we were forced to discontinue.

"Sex on the job," I said as I looked for my shirt.

"It's not in the job, love. It's a party right now, take it as that," he was also dressing himself.

We finally got dressed and we made our way back downstairs.

"The sex was great...I'm glad you were my first, doctor."

He grabbed my ass, "Glad I could be your first. You were great for you first time. You're adorable~"

That made me blush so I turned the other way. He snaked his hand around my waist once he met with a colleague of his.

"Where were you?" they asked.

"Went to the balcony."

"Was that all? Isn't this that fatso's secretary?"

"Yeah, we just talked about the work plans."

"Yeah," the colleague seemed skeptical and they went to get a drink.

+++

The next day I was flooded with questions by my colleagues, not to mention the interrogation my boss gave me on our way to his house. I ended up telling him what happened and like a little fangirl he freaked out and asked about the experience and started mentioning various scenarios of "The secretary's secret life." I was so embarrassed, my boss is pretty cheerful but not like this, it's like we're best friends and not one working for the other.

Anyway I never got the doctor's number since I left in a hurry that night. I do occasionally call him for work and we've met at least three times since then. We exchange suggestive looks but don't take it further than taking a walk in the building and talking about flora ☻

[hanamakkiss]

One Dumb Deed Deserves Another

Iwaizumi Hajime x f!reader

Summary: Five times Iwaizumi and you meet.

Word count: 4k+

A/n: this took so long... but I quite like it! Pretty much just fluff and shenanigans. As u can tell I’m in love with him.

Your first meeting was nothing short of disastrous, Iwaizumi fondly recalls.

His peaceful morning walk through the park to campus was shattered by one very loud, very directed at him shouting.

“HEY! HEY YOU!!! THE GUY IN THE DENIM JACKET!!!! HOLD ON A SEC!” a high-pitched yet commanding voice echoes through the practically empty park, clueing him in that it was probably him you were referring to.

He pauses to look skyward, making a silent prayer for the strength to make it through the day, before turning around. He’s met with a red-faced young woman who was currently struggling to catch up to him.

You stopped a few feet in front of him, hands on your knees, panting, and he waits for you to catch your breath.

“Hi,” you look up, unabashedly grinning, and he finds you have a surprisingly sweet voice when not shouting. He quirks a brow, inquiring.

“Yea so, uh, I'm a photographer," you hold up the camera around your neck, "student, actually, and uh, I just took a photo of you? I mean, I did, cause your back looked really nice with the surrounding trees and sky, especially when you were staring at something, a bird maybe? And with a little colour editing the image would really pop, so the photo turned out really nice," you smiled shyly, looking at the photo in question (presumably).

“O...kay?” he’s not sure how to respond.

“Do you want to see it?” your smile is infectious.

His lips quirk up as he steps closer to you, peering over your arm (it really was a cool photo), “But you’re telling me all this why...?”

“Oh! Right. So, uh, I wanted to know if you would be okay with me using your photo in an assignment? I understand if you want to say no, but that would be such a pity, cause you look so cool here, and if no one else got to see it it would be a tragedy. But it’s up to you really! I could just keep it in my files maybe? If you would allow me!” your face has steadily gotten redder with every word that tumbled out of your mouth, and at the end of your spiel you were looking absolutely mortified, using your camera to hide your face.

“Hey, calm down, it’s fine, you can use it,” he latches on to your shoulders hoping to keep you grounded as you looked on the verge of hyperventilating, “Are you alright?”

“Yea! Yea, I’m fine, I just didn’t expect you to be so,” he tilts his head slightly, brows furrowing, “hot,” you squeaked out.

At your response Iwaizumi's face burns up. He knew people generally found him attractive, but to have it so bluntly said to his face, was not exactly something he was used to. Especially when said with such sincerity.

His hands immediately retract.

“Oh. Thanks, I guess? Uh, I’ll be seeing you then, good luck with your assignment.” He scratches the back of his neck.

“Thank you so much! I’ll be sure to let you know how it goes!” you gave him a low bow, nearly slamming into his chest in the process. Standing back up equally as suddenly, you rushed to introduce yourself, face still the shade of ruby.

He can’t help but chuckle, “Iwaizumi Hajime,” he offers.

Opening your mouth, you’re cut off by an alarm that blares from your bag. As you scramble to shut it off, your eyes bulge. “Shit! I’m gonna be late! Sorry! I need to go now!” You shoot him an apologetic smile before sprinting.

“Thank you again! I’ll treat you someday!” he sees you wave from afar.

Iwaizumi is just left in your dust, amused and wondering how would you, considering he never even gave you his number.

Your second meeting was pure coincidence.

He was in line at the campus cafe, when the short person in front sneezed so hard they fell backwards into him.

Oof. His hands reached out instinctively to catch them.

“Hey, you alright?” he peers down into their face-

“I’m so sorry!” they tilt up-

and the two heads collide.

He grunts, rubbing his chin where it hurt. The hood falls off their head.

“It’s you.” he could almost laugh at the comedic timing, of course it’s you.

You look up, hands still covering your forehead, and exclaim excitedly, “Iwaizumi! Fancy seeing you here! How are you?”

He chuckles at your enthusiasm, ruffling your (already mussed up) hair, “I’m good, how did your assignment go?”

“It went great! My tutor only had constructive criticism for it. Speaking about that, let me buy you a drink,” you attempt to tame the mess he created, “as thanks,” you grin.

Any refusal on his part was washed away by your insistence, leaving the two of you on the side waiting for your morning brews.

“By the way, is it okay if I ask you something else?”

“Shoot.”

“Ever since that day, I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” you tuck your hair behind your ear, shyly, (he tenses, vaguely aware of where this might go) “and I was wondering if you would maybe, you know, if you’re free, would you be willing to” you took a deep breath, “be my model?” your eyes were practically sparkling.

Iwaizumi feels light-headed. It's amazing how every other sentence from you gives me whiplash, he thinks, it must be a skill. He mentally heaves a relieved sigh, happy that he didn’t need to reject another date offer.

His silence causes you to fidget, looking away, “Uh, it’s really okay if you don’t want to, I just thought you would be a good fit for my next project, and you seemed like a nice guy, so I thought it would be worth a shot, and I could always-”

"No, no, I’d be glad to help you out," he finds he prefers you when your eyes have a shine to them, and it’s not like he had too much on his plate at the moment.

The smile you show him is infectious, and he really can’t stop his features from mirroring your own.

You actually remember to exchange numbers this time, promising to text him about the specifics of the photoshoot soon before (once again) rushing off for class.

As he’s walking, iced coffee in hand, he mulls over the fact that he’s entirely comfortable around you, despite barely even knowing you.

Your third meeting was certainly a colourful experience.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

On the mentioned day, Iwaizumi finds himself sighing when Hanamaki ushers a mousy looking you into the gymnasium.

“Found this one outside muttering “Iwaizumi” in a panic,” he gives a good natured laugh, “figured she could use some help.”

“Thank you so much! There’s way too many people here, I thought this was just a practice match…” you trailed off.

Iwaizumi’s nostrils flare, “It is, and it’s all because of a specific bastard,” he jabs a finger in the direction of Oikawa, who was currently surrounded by girls.

You take a quick photo, “And who is he? Seems popular,” you inspect the photo.

“Oh? You’ve never heard of Oikawa Tooru? College superstar?” Hanamaki leans in towards you, smirk in place.

Seeing you shrink back, Iwaizumi instinctively moves closer. Makkis eyebrows lift.

“Oh! I’ve heard that name before! My friends talk about him sometimes! This is my first time seeing him though,” you happily snap another shot, “they’ll like these.”

He watches you review the photos when Matsukawa appears next to Makki, “Who’s this?”

“Oh right, let me introduce you guys,” and he calls over the rest of the team for a round of introductions, ending with Oikawa, who waves at you from across the court before calling everyone to start warm-up.

Throughout the game you stay near the sideline, careful to keep away from the ball’s trajectory (you can’t afford another camera), snapping as many impactful shots as you could. You managed to get a few good shots of everyone, and some satisfactory shots of Iwaizumi.

It comes to a close with him scoring the winning spike and you rush to get every possible second of it. As you watch the team celebrate the point through the lens he suddenly looks straight at you, and flashes you the biggest grin you’ve ever seen him sport.

And it’s like the world goes silent and you’ve forgotten how to breathe. The only saving grace you have is your fingers instinctively pressing the trigger, cementing this moment in time.

You’re shocked out of your reverie by the shutter clicking and you hurriedly smile and flash him a thumbs up, hoping the warmth of your cheeks was unnoticeable from the distance.

As soon as he’s done with the after match meeting he rushes over to you, followed by a couple of teammates who were interested in the photos.

“You alright?”

“More than alright! This was my first time watching volleyball and so close to boot! You were amazing! Spectacular! Especially that last point! I got some good shots of it! Wanna see?”

In your excited rambling you failed to notice the faint pinkness of his face, thrusting your camera towards him.

Soon a little group had gathered around you, jostling to get a better view of the shots you took. Scrolling through one by one each shot was met by rambunctious comments as they marvel at how they match looked through a camera. Nearing the end of your roll, Matsukawa makes a comment.

“Why are so many of these photos of Iwaizumi though?” his eyes hold a teasing glint that looks out of place with his mouth still in a fine line. (You choose to ignore the concealed assumption for the sake of your heart.)

Your mouth forms an O, looking straight at the person in question, “Did you not tell them?”

He avoids your gaze, “I didn’t, only said that you were our photographer for this match,” he scratches his neck.

You let out a mirthful laugh at his embarrassment, eyes twinkling, “To answer, the only reason I’m being your photographer is cause Iwaizumi agreed to be my model for school, and I’m doing it as thanks,”

"If you need a model, wouldn't someone like me be better?" Oikawa flashes you a cheeky smile.

You cock your head, appraising Oikawa. He preens under your stare.

"It wouldn't work for this project,” shaking your head slightly, “you know your own attractiveness, and have made it a part of your identity. On the other hand, Iwaizumi has confidence that solely stems from other aspects of his life, this causes him to radiate a kind of rugged charm that just pulls people to him. Like some kind of reliable pillar, it makes you want to depend on him. That kind of energy was exactly what I was looking for!" you beam.

The boys blink, clearly surprised at your answer. Oikawa is the first to break the silence, laughing.

"Wow, Iwa! I didn't know you had such amazing energy! Wonder if you would share any of that with me someday!" he pats him on the back harder than necessary. Iwaizumis’ face burns as he glares at his best friend, daring him to say another word.

At Iwaizumi's less than stellar response, you start to worry you’ve said something wrong, "Oh, uh, I didn't mean to imply you weren't attractive! In fact I think you're probably one of the most attractive people I know, uh and I didn't mean to call you a pillar! It's just a phrase!" you slap a hand across your mouth, eyes going wide. A pillar? Seriously? God, could this get any worse?

“Let me walk you out,” Iwaizumi grits out as his friends laugh.

Newsflash, it can.

You withdrew into yourself, resigned to just let him push you out. The walk to the gym entrance is silent.

Just as you were about to split, he speaks.

“Sorry...about them,”

You look back, surprised. “Uh…?”

Eloquence.

He gives you an embarrassed smile, “They can be a bit much, but they mean no harm.”

Oh. It still takes you a second to realise that his earlier irritation was not directed at you, and you mentally sigh in relief. “It’s cool, they were nice,” you smile.

“You looked really uncomfortable in there,”

“Ah,” you rub your neck. “I’m just... not the best around big groups,”

“Ah.”

The two of you shift awkwardly.

“I’ll be going now,” you make to leave, “Thanks again,”

“No problem.” He laughs, ”Think you gave me too much praise back there,”

“Nah, just cause you can’t see it, doesn’t mean it isn’t there,”

The huge smile that accompanied your words causes his heart to skip a beat.

“See you around,” you give a little wave.

“Uh-yea, see ya.”

He watches you walk away, heart threatening to jump right out his chest. Before he can even begin to contemplate what just happened, an all too annoying voice interrupts him.

“You’re into her.”

“Am not.” He huffs toward the brunet.

Oikawa just laughs, “She doesn’t know it yet, but she’s into you too.”

“Keep talking and I’ll kick your ass.”

The taller boy skirts away, giggling. He doesn’t miss the way Iwaizumi’s cheeks pink.

Your fourth meeting was Iwaizumi’s’ prayers answered.

After the match, the two of you don’t cross paths much, opting instead for online communication.

Due to both of you being terrible texters, the text conversation never goes too in-depth. Mostly keeping to studies, interests and random topics. It’s only when one of you calls the other, that the conversation intensifies, lasting several hours.

After one such call, Oikawa groans from the doorway. Iwaizumi instantly springs up from his bed.

“Why don’t the two of you get together already,” he drags out the last word.

“Why are you in my room.”

“It’s 1am, you’re messing up my beauty sleep.”

“You were eavesdropping,” he squints, tone accusing.

“The walls are thin! It’s hard not to,” Oikawa defends himself, “besides, you laugh like a goddamn horse.”

At Iwaizumi’s glare, he backtracks, hands raised defensively, “I’m kidding! Kidding! Goodnight Iwa,”

“Close the damn door!”

He sighs, finally alone and wonders how is he going to ask you out for a meal. (Just to hang out, definitely not a date)

When you text him again.

Damn, this is as close as he’ll come to believing in higher power.

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

The next week, he rushes down to the gallery after his evening class. He makes it with half an hour to spare.

Looking around, he quickly spots some familiar portraits and makes his way over. He sees you engaged in conversation, and he likes to think that the way your face lit up upon eye contact has something to do with him.

You cut the conversation and step towards him.

“You made it!”

He lets out a chuckle, “Course I would, sorry I’m late, class got dragged,”

“No, no, glad you’re even here,” you wave your hand flippantly, drawing his eyes to the rest of your body, where you had worn a simple cocktail dress that fit you well.

He takes in a sharp breath, “You look great,” slips out.

“Oh, um, thank you, you don’t look too shabby yourself,” your smile takes on a bashful shade and he looks around at the other patrons, grimacing.

“Bullshit, I didn’t know it was such a formal event, otherwise I would have dressed better,”

Your eyes quickly scanned his outfit, dark wash jeans paired with a white tee and bomber jacket, “You look fine,” leaning in, you stage-whisper, “If you ask me, you look a lot more put together than most of the people I’ve seen today.”

“Earlier on someone even came in piss-drunk,” you laugh.

“No way, midday?”

“Yes! Security had to escort them out, total mess. It was entertaining though,” you gently guide him towards your portion of the exhibition.

5 portraits titled Magnetism hung neatly on a wall. Two of them of him, he notes.

“It’s just a student exhibition, so it’s not much,” you explain, chuckling.

He frowns, “Don’t downplay your skills, you worked hard and got selected right? That counts for something,”

Your face goes slack for a moment before morphing into a soft smile, “Thank you, I do have a bad habit of that.”

He feels a warmth creep up his neck, shitshitshit, that’s not good for my heart, quick-

“So what’s the inspiration behind your portraits?” He shifts his attention towards the exhibition (ie. away from your warm eyes)

This easily distracts you and you go into an excited monologue about your motivations and what you were trying to convey through the atmosphere, lighting and editing. He only manages to keep up with half of it (it has nothing to do with how cute you looked animatedly waving your hands around).

You move on to explain each photo and how they embodied a different aspect of Magnetism that you wanted to convey to the viewer, ending with the photo you took of him the day you met.

“Fun fact: this is my second favourite photo of you,” you grin cheekily.

He plays along, “Why so?”

“Caaaaause it led to us meeting!” Your playful demeanour shoots an arrow straight to his heart.

Now grinning, he continues the banter, “And is the other photo your favourite?”

“Nope! That’s the third, because it shows everyone’s trust in you,”

He’s a little intrigued now, “Then which is the first?”

“Thaaaat’s a secret!” You wink, cheeks flushed.

Andddddd there goes his heart.

He’s forced to come to terms with the fact that his infatuation with you has turned into a full blown, rock to the face, crush. And all in the span of a second.

He flushes, “Well, maybe another day then,” and turns back to the photos.

“None of these people are facing the camera. Why is that,”

“I’ve been waiting for someone to ask me that all day!” And you go into another spiel. He realises just how much he enjoys listening to you speak about your passions.

Soon the curator announces the closing of the gallery and the two of you make your way out. You make an offhand remark about still needing to cook. He immediately suggests grabbing a bite together and you are just as quick to agree.

After enjoying a wonderful dinner at a local restaurant, you stop him just as he tries to get away with paying the bill.

“Hey! I’ll pay half, let me see the receipt,” you reach for the check, only to have it pulled out of your grasp.

“Nah, my treat,” he continues to wave the check out of your reach. This goes on for a little while before you cry out in annoyance.

“Oh come on, you don’t have to, this isn’t a date or anything,” and he freezes at your words.

He’s caught off guard by how much he wishes it was, if only the little words would dislodge themselves from his throat and let him ask you out.

With him distracted you lunge for the check and succeed, happily scanning through and making calculations. Once done you hand it back to him and promptly transfer the money.

You leave the restaurant in high spirits while Iwaizumi feels kind of feels defeated. He still offers to walk you back to your dorm, which you agree to after minimal convincing.

The walk back is filled with conversation that flows naturally between the two of you, making up for your horrendous texting game. It’s something he finds he doesn’t mind, as long as he knows you actually like talking to him, he’s fine with waiting hours for a reply.

“So, this is me,” you come to a stop in front of an old building. It’s not far from his apartment, he makes a mental note.

“This is you,” he cringes inwardly.

Thankfully, you just laugh, “Thanks for coming to the exhibition and spending time with me, I really enjoyed that…uh...”

His lips turn up, teasing, “Not-date?”

You flush, “Yea, that not-date,”

Both of you stand in comfortable silence, unwilling to part. He knows how stupid this is, two idiots just skirting around a relationship, but he doesn’t know what he should do. Sometimes he wishes he was a teensy bit more like Oikawa, but the thought is vanquished before it could even begin to take root.

“So,” you break the silence, “see you around?”

He lets out a breath and nods, “Yea, definitely,” and you wave.

He waits until you’re safely in the building before making his way back, sighing way too much for someone in college.

He spends the walk thinking about how much he enjoyed that “not-date”, and hopes soon he could enjoy an actual date with you.

Your fifth meeting was the end of Iwaizumi’s patience.

It’s been weeks since he’d realised his feelings for you. And he knows you feel the same way towards him too. You’re not subtle.

You are, however, extremely oblivious and respectful. Ever since he had mentioned early on in the friendship that he wasn’t looking for anything relationship-wise, you had dutifully dodged every single one of his advances. At this rate, your non-existent relationship was on the road to nowhere.

He’s sick of it, and at his wits end.

He finds Makki and Mattsun lounging in the living room.

“Hey, uh,” both heads turn his way. “I need some advice.”

“Well, my friend,” Makki moves, patting the newly vacated seat next to him, “you’ve come to the right place,”

As the couch dips under him, he takes a moment to register that Yes, he is really doing this, before he launches into detail about his feelings, frustration with the state of things and asks for help.

"Simply put,” Makki interjects, “you want to do the do, want to pound that duck, want to woohoo her-"

"What the fuck is a woohoo," Iwaizumi cuts him off sharply.

Mattsun's jaw drops. Makki gasps in delight, clapping his hands together, "A woohoo is when two sims who love each other very much-"

"Oh my god," he sinks his head into his hands, "you're referencing the sims, to talk about sex."

Oikawa sticks his head through the door, "Who's trying to woohoo who?"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP." Iwaizumi screams.

Oikawa dramatically places a hand on his heart and almost looks hurt before realisation dawns. “This is about little miss photographer, isn’t it?” He smirks when Mattsun wiggles his brows suggestively as a response.

Iwaizumi lets out a heavy sigh, resigned, "Yes, it's about her. Also, no," he looks to the strawberry blond, "I don't just want to have sex with her."

"So you do want to bang her," he could feel the smugness emanating from all three of them. The vein on his forehead threatens to pop. He passes a hand over his face, wondering if an aspirin could save him now.

"Just... just help me think of a way to ask her out,"

"Why don't you just ask her straight out? Always works," Oikawa supplied.

Iwa groans, “If I ask her out normally she’ll think its just as friends,”

A pause.

"Also I want it to be special, like a cute story for the future, you know?" he admits. Makki coos.

Silence falls as they brainstorm.

After some time Matsukawa pipes up, "I... might have an idea,"

All heads swivel towards him.

"She's a photographer, right?"

≿━━━━༺❀༻━━━━≾

"Iwaizumi! Over here!" you excitedly wave him over.

"Thanks for willingly being my model again," you grinned, "somehow that physique of yours seems to get me better critiques. ...Wait a minute, does my tutor have a crush on you?" he sighed when you seriously pondered that thought for a moment.

You give him a brief rundown of your assignment and what you needed him to do. It was rather simple this time as the focus was more on lighting, you just needed him to walk casually and look at the camera every once in a while.

After the first couple of shots you see him reach into his pocket and pull out some sort of... banner? Your brows furrow as you continue snapping shots. Only when he fully unfurls it do you cease movement, letting your camera slip out of your hands entirely.

Thankfully, your camera strap works perfectly and the weight of it dropping against your neck brings you back to life, snapping your mouth shut.

Iwaizumi Hajime stands five feet away from you, holding up a small banner that reads “Please go on an actual date with me.”

“I- You- what….?” Is the best you come up with.

He grins, “It reads, I really like you, please go out with me,”

“You like…?” Seems like you’re full on malfunctioning now, and about to overheat too.

“I like you, have been liking you for a while now,” he rubs his neck nervously, “so, what’s your answer?”

You nod frantically, no longer trusting your mouth. His grin stretches impossibly wide.

You’ve always known you were a bumbling idiot and a mess. But now looking at his laughing face backlit by the setting sun, you can’t help thinking that maybe being an idiot wasn’t all that bad.

The shutter clicks.

This might just be your favourite photo yet.

(Matsukawa is later asked how he knew you would like such a gesture. “Judging from the way you spoke of her, I figured she was into sappy shit, and that you probably was into it too.” He gets headlocked for a full five minutes.)

[to-come-alive]

Ada Masalı 1x05

Yeah, I know I took too long to post this review but I was kinda busy with other things. Well, I still am but I want to do this now. So let's begin:

Yeah ... they came back to be what they were before the 'gitme' moment. I'm a little disappointed by that but how could I expect smth different? They're so into each other that being more than they are rn means them being together for real. And it's only ep 5, it's too soon for them to be together.

Didn't think Haziran's relationship with her mother was so bad. I imagined that her mother could be a little too much but not so much that Haziran had to go to a boarding school to be away from her. And their problematic relationship helps to understand why her father's death was so difficult. I mean, it's always difficult to lose a parent but maybe her father was the one that really cared abt her. He was, I think, what kept their household stable. And when he was gone, things began to fall apart.

I remember seeing someone saying that Haziran was a superficial character, that she needed more depth. I don't agree with that. I think she has more depth than Poyraz even. There's her relationship with her mother which is complex to analyse, and her father's death is still a trauma for her. And speaking of trauma, her fear of the sea is not smth natural, she developed that due to some trauma, most probably related to her dad. So, for me, Haziran has layers.

I was hoping, in that scene of her mother's arrival, that they focused on Poyraz's confusion with the whole situation. Cuz he was the only one that didn't know who was Zeynep (except for Nehir who didn't know her either, but she knew abt Zeynep's bad relationship with aunt Selma), and everyone got so restless after her arrival that I could only think abt what was Poyraz thinking abt all that.

Loved that Poyraz went after Haziran after her talk with her mother. He worries abt her and just wants her to feel good. I personally love this trope of the guy consoling the girl.

I love how everyone agrees that Poyraz and Haziran are a couple. Especially after the 'gitme' scene. And I also like that they're trying to understand their relationship and maybe bring them together. They're not just ignoring the fact that poyhaz are maybe a thing.

I'm growing more and more to like Biricik. She's so cute! While I'm growing more and more to dislike Idil. She really thought that she would ruin Poyraz's life and he would run to her?! (although yeah I know he doesn't know she's the reason but he doesn't even look at her, let alone fall in love with her). I'm glad Haziran didn't tell the truth to Poyraz. He wouldn't believe her anyways and this would only make them fight. If Poyraz doesn't want to see who is Idil, then leave it to fate, this is not her job.

Does Poyraz see that Haziran does NOT like Hakan? Or he just chooses to ignore? Cause the girl obviously can't stand that guy and Poyraz simply doesn't see or acknowledge that. I understand him not talking abt Idil and Haziran's problem with each other (I don't really understand his relationship with Idil. Does he know she likes him and just not talk abt it? Or he doesn't know? I don't know!!). But doesn't he find it weird that Haziran always go away or makes some unpleasant face whenever Hakan comes? Idk, it's weird.

OMG his grandma woke up?!! I thought this was smth that was gonna happen in like ep 10 or smth. Well, I don't think she's gonna remember all of Haziran's talks with her right now. She was in a coma! She needs time to recover herself from that. Maybe in the future she will have some glimpses abt that. Let's see.

That's all for now. Bye!

[butterbeeryuta]

donghyuck as your boyfriend

oh my mcfucking god im sorry but lmAO you better have some patience in you

because i'm a sucker for college aus, we're going to base this headcanon on that cause i said so

it's your second year in college studying history cause it's the best subject in the world (yes i am biased what about it) and you were at the library taking those aesthetic af notes on 17-18th century russia. your highlighters were everywhere, your looseleaf papers were scattered, but you just wanted to get the whole peter the great (co-tsar of russia from 1682, and became THE tsar of russia by 1696) stuff done so you could go home and snack on chips and watch the good place

'holy shit you're doing a lot wow'

who tf??

you looked up, only to see lee donghyuck aka haechan the loud and mischevious and pretty guy of the campus, surprised at your condensed notes and arguably intense method of studying

'uhH, yeah. i guess i am?'

and donghyuck, being the nosy ass sunshine he is, decides to sit with you and just watch you do your shit in pure astonishment cause lmao tf are notes

'so you're the student professor x talks about,,, no wonder why. y/n right?'

uhhHhhhH

UHHHHHH

'yes, and you're lee donghyuck?'

'glad to know my work and effort is recognised by the school body' and you have no idea how to respond to that so you just keep writing cause,,,, that's what you were going to do anyway

thing is, donghyuck knows you. he's seen you a lot in creative writing, always with the best supplies and neatly taking down notes. he's not even like that himself, but he finds it so attractive esp coming from you. he doesnt think it's a kink, and he prays to whatever gods out there that it isn't a kink— but studious you does shit to his heart

i don't think i mentioned this, but you're study partners with jeno and renjun who also takes european history and anthropology which hyuck is unaware of, but you also didn't know that you're study group lives with donghyuck and lives a fucking chaotic life.

kneeways, donghyuck was just watching you take notes, and after about 15 minutes when you realised he wasn't moving, you stopped writing and looked up at him again.

'is there anything i could help you with? you've been watching me take notes for —'

'do you want to go on a date with me?'

'ok why you cutting me of— wait what now?'

what??? just??? happened???

haechan, my dear, you two JUST MET

'we literally just met 30 minutes ago' you said, looking at him with the most confused expression

'well yeah, but if we date, we can get to know each other better'

well, you still said no

'well then, i guess i'm going to keep coming back to this library until you say yes' and lee forking donghyuck leaves like that.

you didn't believe him. what idiot would go back to you just for a yes on a date

yeah the idiot's haechan

you were once having a study session with renjun and jeno, and haechan just so happens to see the three of you having an intense discussion on who was a better leader of russia: peter the great or catherine the great

injunnie immediately notices his friend and said, 'who tf allowed you in a library??'

then this is where you interrupted: 'oh? ya'll know each other?'

haechan is confused.

you're confused.

evergone is confused.

jeno then explains how he and renjun, along with jaemin and chenle amd jisung are dorm mates with haechan; whereas you explained to haechan that the 2 boys were your study buddies, amd you told the boys how haechan was the 'library creep that keeps asking me out'

'SO YOURE THE LIBRARY CREEP?' - huang renjun, 2k19

'WAIT SO Y/N IS THE HOT ACADEMIC?? really hyuck???' lee jeno, 2k19

'god you call me the library creep? that hurts my bronchioles' haechan says

idk it felt right to say that

kneeways, now that ya'll apparently have common friends, ya'll hang out more aside from studyinh like: having lunch, playing bowling, karaoke, dinner, amd etc. it was nice overall.

maybe like 6-7 months later, haechan still visits you in the library and sits close to you while you were concentrated on whatever tf you were doing. he doesnt really ask you out much as before, but his feelings did grow for you.

there was one time where you all watched the live action of aladdin and you started singing along to the songs— and haechan found that adorable.

and there was another time where you got into a heated historical debate with renjun and even if haechan understood nothing, he was just amazed at you (even if you were very close to biting renjun's head off)

jaemin realises how whipped donghyuck is getting for you, and he's also amused at this point

NOW, exams were coming up and that means,,, YOURE MAKING STUDY PACKS YEYYYYY

so here you are, at the library, writing a lot hoping whatever is on paper would go in your brain

and you did it for hours

and hours.

and just like any other day, hyuck visits you— but it was so visible you're tired.

'you alright?' he asks and you sorta just,,, threw your highlighter at him

'fuck this hyuck i'm going to flunk the exams, why do i even bother making such extensive notes....' and you just went on for a solid 7 minutes but

he still listens to you. he still looks at you with admiration like

the fuck?

and you just noticed how even at your rambling state, he still listens to you and you start crying like get a fucking grip hoe

hyuck is confused and he starts panicking cause he doesnt know what to do and he sorta goes over to you and hugs you in a very awkward way (i hope ya'll get what i mean)

AND YOU'RE DONE you're sobbing hoW can you not have noticed someone cares for you this much

it sorta hits you all at once; he stays with you everyday after lessons so you can complete your notes, he's always there even during study sessions with renjun and jeno, he's there when you need someone to hang out with on the weekends— he's always there for you

'i don't really know how to help people calm down with their feelings cause I can barely control mine but, I think you should go home and rest a bit, the stress probably got into you and—'

'yes'

'so let me help you pac— yes what?'

'yes, i'll go out with you'

*cue your face snuggling in his chest*

HYUCK DIED SKDJAKDKSKDKS

haechan? sorry he died 0.3 seconds ago

he smiles,,, a LoT AND he just holds you tighter, rubbing your back

'well, at least i won't have to go to this boring ass library anymore'

'HEY'

a/n: UWUUUUUUUU!!! okay lmao i've been making study packs recently for mocks (and yes it's for history) and ig that inspired me for this. if ya'll one day see me post a whole post on 17-18th century russia as well as authoritarian states (china and germany) please ignore me cause that's probably just me reviewing. anD if you're interested, i'll gladly share my note-taking styles and stuff so yeS i am THAT person. hope all of you have a great day ❤️