#I'm really bored pals

[lilithmymind]

Hey, pals, have I told ya just how much I love villain route? No? Not yet? Than welcome.

I'm fucking obsessed with that route, especially John in there. Villain Joker is very collected and serious, even though he's smiling and laughing, his whole mannerisms and attitude is much more serious and maybe even cold sometimes. He have power to lead a bunch of people and create a huge and working plan to destroy Gotham which he sabotages by the other side of his character. Joker's clothing is still as messy as John's, showing up what he still has that little John Doe left in him, and visualizes his inner conflict. During that route Joker showed John out, letting himself be insecure, letting himself doing something good and what John wants himself, not what he should be wanting. John clearly shows up at the over emotional moments like when he asks Batman to don't tell Harley about what he bettayed her, stopping Harley from killing Bruce and when he pre&after-fight with Bruce, showing up what no matter how collected and what «monster» John became as The Joker, he's still the same confused kind guy in the inside who just happened to find himself more at creating destruction than anything else. John was a puppet of dark thoughts and desires all along, but he always hid it behind, meanwhile Joker was a puppeteer who can't survive without his puppet stopping him and putting him onto the right paths.

Also I really love Bruce&John's line there. Joker in all ways tries to show Bruce how much he despises him, how much he hates him, how much he doesn't care, but still he does, John does. Meanwhile Bruce is literally holding over a lot of sadness and pain. Imagine what the person you loved, cared about, who seemed to be so nice and good, ends up becoming a monster, ends up torturing you, your friends, your parental figures, and than you have to fight him. For Bruce this was a huge crack, since his best «friend» becomes his enemy, becomes someone, who Bruce can't recognize because he was too blinded by his feelings to notice what something is wrong with John on the fundamental way. Especially once John got a heart attack. John probably thought what they'll never see each other again at the last moment, and Bruce probably thought the same, but If John would die really, Bruce won't. Bruce would be holding this forever until the day he'll die himself. But, thanks God, John stays alive snd wakes up, it still left a huge scar on Bruce, especially it got deeper once that old motherf—Ahem, Alfred, decided what he's leaving and said what the thing what happened to people around Bruce, including John, was Bruce's fault.

I can't stop imagining what would happen after that way. Bruce never visit John, but Joker already planning something to do with Bruce what will make Bruce just like John. Bruce's decisions really did impact John, because all this violence, the fact what John isn't so scared to be a murderer who he is now and etc might've get out once John watched Bruce's behavior, once he noticed what it's «fine» too, what John can be who he is. John probably has plans on using the same what Bruce did to open up all those darkness inside him too.

I was yapping about only the way I played the game so your experience with the route might've been a little bit different.

[zachary-kitty]

how the mitchells vs. machines predicted modern views towards AI/robots

AI is evil. The robots are nonchalantly evil and take over the world by abducting the entire human population within less than a few hours

AI's creators are unethical and soulless. The robot apocalypse happens because mark steals people's data and casually announces replacing who is basically his phone daughter

AI wants you replaced and/or dead. PAL and the robots' main goal is to rid the world of the human species by deporting them

AI is incredibly stupid. The robots have zero self-preservation instinct and PAL's plan would've succeeded if she wasn't an idiot

AI can't be reasoned with. PAL kicks her creator in the balls and drops a girl from a thousand feet high for telling her it's wrong to launch all the humans into space

AI isn't worth keeping around. Humanity is saved not by trying to give the machines a redemption arc but by destroying them with extreme prejudice and forgetting about them entirely

AI is only excusable if it's funny. Eric and Deborahbot 5000

[applejarjar]

palworld kinda overrated ngl

[matt-is-me]

Mind Trick

cw:hypnosis,arousal

You and your friend are sitting on their couch, watching TV and unwinding after a very tiring day. You've both had a ton of work to worry about, and they think the best remedy for that exhaustion is to destress on the couch for a bit, then try out the trigger they gave you the previous day.

It was a Jedi Mind Trick suggestion, one that makes you mindlessly agree with them any time they wave their hand front of your face. You thought it was a very nerdy thing to use during a hypnosis session, but you'd be lying if you said you weren't curious of its effects.

You wanted to chill out for a bit, but there had to be a better way to do that. The TV was very boring. It was that dumb cooking show your friend always watches. You couldn't stand it, it was like watching paint dry.

"Can you please change the channel? You know how much I hate this show" , you asked, in a tired, grumpy tone.

They waved their hand.

"But you love this show, hun, you always have!"

Your previous opinion began to fade from your head, swiped away by the hand authoritavely swaying in front of you.

That.. that was true. It had always been that way. What were you complaining about? You loved to watch cooking shows! They offered a very relaxing, and informative experience, and suddenly it became impossible to take your eyes off the screen.

You continued watching with your friend for a while, excited with your newfound knowledge of how to prepare Steak au Poivre. It wasn't until both of you spent a little time relaxing your muscles that they suggested doing something else.

"Hm, I've chilled out enough. I'm in the mood for something.. diferent. Are you horny, dear?" They looked at you as they quizzed you on your arousal.

On one hand, you were a bit aroused, and it was the perfect way to destress. But on the other, you were pretty tired, and it was much easier to sit and watch the show. You needed a push, if your friend wanted this very lazy evening to end differently.

They waved their hand.

"You're incredibly aroused"

This time, you repeated their words, doing so without resistance. "I'm incredibly aroused" , you replied, the mindless tone of your voice quickly erasing your previous opinions.

That.. that was true. It had always been like that. Your tired expression morphed from sleepy to unfathomably horny. The thoughts that occupied your mind changed, from ones of curling up on the couch to sexual fantasies of your tist. Your mind grew aroused.

You began to absent-mindedly touch yourself. Nothing major, of course, but just enough to keep yourself worked up. Your friend watched your sudden shift in personality, content with how easy it was to make you agree with them.

They waved their hand.

"Your mind is extremely fuzzy"

"My mmind... fuzzy...", you replied, not even a tiny ammount of hesitation in your voice.

That was true. Your mind could barely keep a coherent thought inside your head. You began to drool your thoughts away as you touched yourself, the only noises escaping your mouth being giggles and moans. You were too dizzy to care about not being understood.

They waved their hand.

"You are really needy. You need me to tell you what to do. What to think."

"N..needyyy....", your voice trailed off, unable to repeat anymore.

That was true. You got closer to them, still touching yourself as you looked into their eyes. Your moans turned into a chorus of needy words, your mind looping the same fantasies of being blanked by your dear pal. You were begging. You had to beg.

"Pleaseee uusee meee,, nneed uu to tell me whhat ddoo.. wahhat too thinkk.. pleasepleasepleasepleaseepleasee"

"Aww, good toy!", your tist responded, a smile forming on their face as they watched your pretty head break from the pleasure.

They waved their hand.

"You're blank."

That was true. You were blank. Your mind suddenly stopped, no longer thinking anything. You froze in place, awaiting commands. You needed to be told what to do. What to think. And your tist had some great ideas~

"I am blank.", you mindlessly replied.

And just like that, with a few waves of a hand, you were gone.

[clare-875]

OMG, Hey, I'm new to this blog. I just read the "New Names" fic you recently wrote. Since Shanks is my favorite character, can you do one of him with the reader?

New Names pt.2 (Shanks, Sabo, Crocodile)

_____ Pairings: Shanks x Reader; Sabo x Reader; Crocodile x Reader Summary: His reaction when you call him buddy, pal, etc. Warnings: Mostly fluff, Slightly suggestive, Female Reader A/N: I decided to add some characters! I hope you like it! <3 [One Piece Masterlist] [Part 1: Luffy, Sanji, Zoro, Ace, Law] [Part 3: Corazon, Killer, Mihawk, Penguin] [Part 4: Kid, Katakuri, Smoker] _____

- Shanks -

(A/N: Slightly longer fic than the others <3)

You sigh as your crewmates look at you with shit-eating grins on their faces. "A deal's a deal [y/n]," Yassop tells you, leaning back smugly as you regrettably accept defeat. You had been playing a game of cards, but this time the only thing on the line was the loser having had to do one thing that the winner pleads. Yassop had (unfortunately for you) won, and he wanted to mess with his Captain through you. "Come on, is it the worst thing I could've asked you to do?" You roll your eyes.

"Fine, I'll do it."

You instantly hear the uproar of cheers from around you and smile despite yourself. The crew must really be bored to find such keen interest in such a little prank. But you would be lying to say you also weren't intrigued about your boyfriend's reaction. You get up from your chair and the crew looks on, amusement lingering in their gazes. Luckily for you, as soon as you stand, Shanks makes his way onto the deck. His eyes shine as soon as he sees you approach.

"Hey, love." He grins wide, beckoning you over.

You teasingly smile, but instead of running into him as you usually do, you pat him on the shoulder and walk past him.

"Hey dude, I'll see you in a minute. I've just got to talk to Benn about something."

You walk off, going to find the second-in-charge whilst trying to stifle your laughter. It's as though instantly you broke the man.

"Wait what-"

Shanks reaches for you but you are already gone. His grin fades and his form goes rigid, it's as though the renowned empower was reduced to something like a child just by your mere words. He looks as though he's seen a ghost.

"What did I do?"

He turns to his crewmates who look on, trying to stifle the laughs that threaten to break free. But ultimately they are able to play dumb.

"Don't ask us, Captain."

The rest of the day, Shanks is at your heels following you, talking to you, trying to figure out if he had done something wrong. But it is either you were truly indifferent or you were great at acting because, despite the name you call him, you hadn't changed. You still looked at him lovingly and happily returned conversation, but that only made the red-haired captain more frustrated.

"It's okay dude, I've got it."

"I'm doing great dude, how are you doing?"

"Hey, dude, mind passing me that?"

It drives your Captain insane.

You only break when night falls, and finally, Yassop's word means nothing as the day has passed. You were lying in bed next to your boyfriend and you could feel his burning stare on you. You turn, and sure enough, your Captain looks at you intently, a crease between his brow.

"What is it?" You say, an amused tone lingering beneath your words. Shanks looks as though he is almost pouting and you have to stop yourself from laughing at the childish display of sadness placed right in front of you.

"Love, did I do something wrong today?"

You tilt your head to the side as the red-haired man in front of you finally spills the words he has been holding onto all day.

"You kept calling me dude."

You try to hold your facade, but light laughter falls from your lips, and it only causes the crease between Shank's eyebrows to deepen. A frown lingered on his face.

"Love," you say, and you instantly see the way his irises enlighten even in the darkness of the room. "It was a prank. I lost a bet with Yassop, I'm sorry." You smile sheepishly and your Captain looks dumbfounded as he stares at you blankly. But you yelp as he suddenly pulls you into his side. When you look up he is staring at you with a burning intensity.

"So you're saying I suffered all day, because of a stupid bet?"

You nervously look to your Captain and mutter a small yes. You swear you capture a glimpse of a relieved smile, but he takes you aback as soon, his lips capture yours.

"You'll pay for that princess."

He murmurs to you teasingly and you laugh before he kisses you once more, warmth igniting within you. His hands are in your hair as your lips move against his more fervently, your touch travels among his bare skin.

"Sure, dude." You mutter.

You can hear Shanks growl lowly in your ear at your response.

- Sabo -

It was a normal day at the Revolutionary Army's base and Sabo hadn't a care in the world. Or at least that's what he thought. Unbeknownst to him, however, were you and Koala planning to make the most of a rare, quiet day. And by making the most of it, you meant ruining Sabo's peace. You were sick of him hanging up on you prematurely and ignoring you when he got too engrossed in a mission.

You both wanted to get him back.

"Come on, [y/n], here he comes!" Koala all but pushes you in the direction of your boyfriend, as she holds a hand to her mouth to stop her giggles. You roll your eyes but wink in her direction, hiding your own grin as you approach. It was just a small prank, after all, nothing to worry about. As you get closer, Sabo looks up from a map he was observing and he smiles at you.

"Love! Take a look, it's for the next mission Dragon-san set us."

You smile softly at his devotion but continue on your secret task at hand; you know Koala is somewhere still watching.

"Looks cool, man. Have you gotten far with the planning yet?"

Sabo is about to reply, but he suddenly freezes when the words you say click in his mind. You stifle a grin, as you watch his eyebrows furrow together and his lips downturn. He gazes at you, but instead of the loving stare you had just seen, all you see is confusion and slight worry.

"Love, is something wrong?"

You smile softly trying not to let it turn into a grin.

"No, of course not... man."

Sabo freezes once more in disdain at the choice of your words. His keen eyes seem to travel yours looking for answers, and you can see his increasing frustration when he finds none. However, he seems to stop when he sees something behind you.

"What-,"

You hear a squeak and you know that it is a Koala, most likely spotted by your boyfriend. You see his lips quirk upwards slightly. Trying to keep up a facade you try to save it by interrupting him.

"Anyway, we should really be getting back to the-"

But your boyfriend seems to have caught onto the game you both were playing and he leans into you teasingly.

"Really, love? Why is Koala hiding behind the wall over there?"

"I don't see anyone." You say as you try to play dumb, but the grin on Sabo's face only widens. Your smile on the other hand wavers and it slowly turns to a pout as you realise he has caught on so quickly.

You turn your face away from your boyfriend defiantly but Sabo is quick to reach out and keep you facing him. You look so pretty to him, even when you're upset. Sabo lets out a low chuckle, but when you meet his eyes you are surprised to see the adoration and relief etched within.

"You know, love. If you wanted attention, you could've just asked."

He leans forward and kisses your pouting lips until he feels them upturn against his once more.

- Crocodile -

As you wait in your shared chambers after lord knows how long, your bored mind starts to wander. You come up with an idea that may not be a good idea in the face of a former warlord of the sea, but you already find yourself convinced. Crocodile had been busy the past weeks and you had barely seen him. You missed him but it also made you petty.

You find yourself hiding a grin when your stoic boyfriend makes his way into the room. He seems tired and smoke still blows from the cigar in his mouth. You stand instantly, giving him a kind smile and you momentarily see his eyes soften at the sight of you. You gently pry the jacket from his broad shoulders and hang it up on the wall.

"Evening, love."

His words are murmured lowly in your ear as he walks past. Your heart thrums faster in your chest, but you decide to go through with your little game anyway.

"Evening, pal. How was your day?"

Your words are softly spoken and soothe Crocodile's raging mind after a strenuous day. However, as soon as he picks up the change in the name you call him, irritation brims, causing his eyes to sharpen when he turns to you.

"What was that?"

Your boyfriend's voice is anything but even. It takes on a deadly edge but you know that despite his tenacious nature, he wouldn't exactly do anything to you for a small prank. Or at least that's what you thought, and so you continued.

"What was what, pal?"

You have to fight a grin at the decomposition of your boyfriend's usually sure facade. But soon, the smile on your face fades and in its place anticipation thrums through you. Your boyfriend is suddenly hovering in front of you, a hand placed surprisingly gently under your chin and forcing you to look at him.

"Don't start now, love." He growls lowly into your ear, and your heart picks up pace from the sudden proximity. You feel yourself falter, but you are determined to see your little plan through.

"What are you talking about, pal?"

If it weren't for the intensity in his stare, you would've laughed at the almost comical name you called such a serious individual. However, Crocodile seems to have had a long day, and now as his beloved seems to want to play games, the day seems scarcely over; punishment is in order.

"I think it's time you remember, exactly who you're calling pal."

You let out a gasp as he hoists you over his shoulder, and you struggle only for a minute before giving in.

You should've known that messing with Crocodile would come with consequences.

[revelboo]

just saying I really really love your writings, like the food you served are so good I can't help but checked on your blog everyday

I see you're writing for TFA? Please please I need more TFA Blurr in my life he's so underrated, please I'm so starving of any contents of him please 🛐🛐🛐

I can try. If I remember correctly, he didn’t get a ton of screen time

A-Ok

TFA Blurr x Reader

• Sometimes it feels like the world around him is painfully slow, everyone else moving at a different pace. That had been the hardest part of his intelligence training, learning patience when it’s not exactly in his nature. Because spy work moves at a crawl. Uncovering secrets, investigating, vetting information. So slow it feels like he’s standing still. When he’d been sent to this young world to investigate rumors of a resurgence of the Decepticon movement, he’d thought there might finally be action. And he was disappointed again. Bored and stuck going nowhere. So when the brightly colored motorcycle blows past him, cutting up the middle of the road so close it almost brushes him, it’s exhilarating.

• Knowing you need to slow down, that there’s no outrunning your problems no matter how fast you go, you still don’t let up on the throttle. Hearing the roar of an engine as the blue sports car you’d just passed tears after you, sliding over into the oncoming lane and keeping pace with your little Kawasaki. Engine revving in challenge. And it’s such a stupid idea, but you cut towards him enough to make him swerve to avoid you. “Catch me if you can, pal.” It’s a distraction, plain and simple. Something to keep you from drowning in worry.

• Nearly laughing as the human on the bike goes up on their back wheel and as soon as the front wheel’s down, they’re gone. And he’s chasing after. Fully aware of how stupidly irresponsible this is, but when’s the last time he was free to do something fun? Well before his academy days. It can’t hurt anything. One little race. You’re fast, but nowhere near as fast as he is. Easily overtaking you and then easing up. Could leave you in his dust, but then the game’s over. And he needs this so bad. To feel alive.

• Blue is keeping up with you. Easily. And that bright, frantic rush of doing something solely for the joy of it spills through you. Because this guy is challenging you. Cutting his own wheels your way to drive you closer to the side in retaliation, easing off before you’d risk going onto the curb. Playing. Who is this guy and where he been all your life? Chasing you to the outskirts of the city near the viaduct. Laughing your head off as you crest the hill and then sobering as you see the truck stalled ahead. Too fast. You’re going way too fast.

• Sees the wreck coming, the way the motorcycle wobbles as you try to stop too suddenly. Knows he can’t intervene, can’t blow his cover. Knows it. And still transforms. Moving so fast he lives up to his name, servos reaching and snagging the back of your jacket. Sees the bike go down and then end over end. Hit the low concrete wall and go airborne. As he slides to a stop, the human clutched to his chassis, their helmet banging against him. And then he’s changing direction, running to find cover from human eyes. Still carrying you.

Next

[harrysfolklore]

dog love - blurb

day 3!! if you’re still following along ilysm okay?💗

GIF BY @delicatepointofview <3

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

//

Yours and Harry's relationship was still a secret to the world.

Even though both of you were famous for your careers and fans and media were always following your every step, you have managed to keep what you had to yourselves for six months now.

Rumors were out there, for sure. And they started when you decided to be in the crowd with Harry's friends for his final show in Reggio Emilia, instead of hiding from prying eyes backstage.

However, no one had really caught up that you were in a relationship, people just assumed that you were friends and you wanted to see the show.

Right now, you and Harry were spending a few months together in his London home, you decided to do that since soon you both would have to go back to your busy careers and be away from each other. You basically moved in to his place, with your dog included.

"Milo! Come over here buddy!" You called out for him, sitting on the den and watching play around Harry's backyard, "You're such a good boy!" You cooed at him when he curled up to you.

"What are you pals doing?" Harry asked, walking through the sliding door that connected the kitchen and the backyard, sitting down next to you and pecking your shoulder quickly.

"We're just hanging out over here," you turned your face to look at him, matching his soft smile, "But I think Milo is eager to go outside, poor thing couldn't go on his walk yesterday because of the rain."

"I can take him for a walk," Harry said, and you noticed that he was indeed dressed up to go outside, "I'm actually meeting with Brad in a few minutes, I can take him with me."

"Would you?" you asked, and he pecked your cheek, standing up and offering his hand so you could join him.

"Of course, love. I can pick up some wine and food on the way back for dinner, you stay here and relax."

You pecked his lips softly before speaking, "You're a dream," he smiled and pecked your lips again, "And you, be a good boy for H, okay?" you knelled down to pet Milo, and with a final kiss to Harry's lips they were off.

You took in Harry's words and decided to relax since you had the house to yourself, you filled up the bathtub, lit up a scented candle and put on some music, leaving your phone behind as you took a bubble bath.

When you were done in the bathroom and clad in one of Harry's soft hoodies, you grabbed your phone and decided to lurk on social media as you waited for Harry and Milo to come home.

You opened Tiktok, your explore page showing you some Harry videos, cute dogs and even some edits of yourself. When you got bored of scrolling there, you decided to open Twitter, which wasn't your favorite platform at all but every now and then you got there to see what fans were on about.

However, you were surprised to find out that what fans have been discussing over the last few hours was Harry walking your dog.

At first, you found funny that his fans were trying to decode if he had adopted a dog, or where did the dog had come from, not knowing hat it was your dog and you were practically living with him.

However, your mood changed when you scrolled down and saw that they somehow connected the dots and found out that the dog with Harry and Brad was your Milo.

You shook your head, surprised by how quickly fans could put the  pieces together, and not sure about how to feel about yours and Harry's relationship being exposed by your dog.

As in on cur, you heard Harry and Milo walking up the stairs to the bedroom, and soon you saw both of them enter the room.

"We're back, love!" Harry cheerfully said, sitting on the end of the bed and Milo staying close to him, "Brought the wine and some food, are you hungry yet?"

"I think Milo just exposed our relationship." You simply said, laughing and how comical the situation sounded out loud.

"What do you mean?" a confused look appeared on Harry's face, and you showed him your phone so he could see.

After a few minutes of scrolling to your Twitter and seeing what fans were saying, Harry couldn't help but find the situation comical too.

"Well, that's better than TMZ, right?"

taglist: @lightsoutstyles @willowpains @straightontilmornin @sleutherclaw @gimsaysay @hazzassmirk @platinumbarbie143 @musicforcinemas @celesteblack08 @scntfrhs @eleanordaisy @lomlolivia @iceebabies @iloveshawn @be-with-me-so-happily @watermelonsugacry @rayisthehoe @drewrry

[magicalmanhattanproject]

man one thing i really love about the qsmp team is how they turn accessibility needs into creative opportunities. when you're disabled, voicing your accessibility needs can feel like you're ruining the fun for other people, but the admins consistently take advantage of accessibility tools to make things more fun and dynamic

like i'm thinking about how easily changing egg signs could have slipped into "aw man new duller colors are more boring" but instead it's "yippee! new creative custom signs for our friends and pals!"

and also just like. going from tubbo mentioning offhandedly that reading signs kinda wears on him after 10 hours on stream to less than 24 hours later there's sign tts to book tts to translation on the tts to making it part of quackity's narrative to using it to add clues and hints that wouldn't have been accessible to people before to allow the multilingual server to have more content available in more languages

like it just speaks to a really good philosophy and intentions at the heart of the team

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Bowen McCurdy and Jordan Morris’s “Youth Group”

NEXT SATURDAY (July 20), I'm appearing in CHICAGO at Exile in Bookville.

Youth Group is Bowen McCurdy and Jordan Morris's new and delightful graphic novel from Firstsecond. It's a charming tale of 1990s ennui, cringe Sunday School – and demon hunting.

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250789235/youthgroup

Kay is a bitter, cynical teenager who's doing her best to help her mother cope with an ugly divorce that has seen her dad check out on his former family. Mom is going back to church, and she talks Kay into coming along with her to attend the church youth group.

This is set in the 1990s, and the word "cringe" hasn't yet entered our lexicon as an adjective, but boy is the youth group cringe. The pastor is a guitar-strumming bearded dad who demonstrates how down he is with the kids by singing top 40 songs rewritten with evangelical lyrics (think Weird Al meets the 700 Club). Kay gamely struggles through a session and even makes a friend or two, and agrees to keep attending in deference to her mother's pleas.

But this is no ordinary youth group. Kay's ultra-boring suburban hometown is actually infested with demons who routinely possess the townspeople, and that baseline of demonic activity has suddenly gone critical, with a new wave of possessions. Suddenly, the possessed are everywhere – even Kay's shitty dad ends up with a demon inside of him.

That's when Kay discovers that the youth group and its corny pastor are also demon hunters par excellence. Their rec-rooms sport secret cubbies filled with holy weapons, and the words of exorcism come as readily to them as any embarrassing rewritten devotional pop song. Kay's discovery of this secret world convinces her that youth group isn't so bad after all, and soon she is initiated into its mysteries, including the existence of rival demon-hunting kids from the local synagogue, Catholic church, and Wiccan coven.

As the nature of the new demonic incursion becomes clearer, it falls on Kay and her pals to overcome these sectarian divisions over the protests of their guitar-strumming, magic-wielding leader. That takes on a special urgency when Kay learns why the demons are interested in her, personally, and a handful of other kids in town who all share a secret trait.

I confess that as someone who lived through the 1990s as a young man, there is something disorienting about experiencing the decade of my young adulthood through the kind of retro lens I associate with the 1950s or 1960s. But while the experience is disorienting, it's not unpleasant. McCurdy's artwork and Morris's snappy dialog conjure up that bygone decade in a way that is simultaneously affectionate and critical, exposing the hollowness of its performative ennui and the brave face that performance represented even as the world was being swept up in corporate gigantism.

McCurdy and Morris are really onto something here, implicitly asking us why the 1990s gave us Buffy and Sabrina (and The Coven, etc etc) – what was it about that decade in which Reaganomics and globalism consolidated the gains of the 1980s, where the climate emergency took on its undeniable urgency, where media monopolies mastered the art of commodifying counterculture faster than it could mutate into new forms?

Morris's writing really shines here. If you enjoyed Bubble, his earlier outing based on the post-apocalyptic comedy podcast of the same name, you will love this one:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/08/21/podcasting-as-a-visual-medium/#huntr

Morris is also half of Jordan, Jesse Go!, the long-running podcast where he and Jesse Thorn do a weekly ha-ha-only-serious goofball schtick that never fails to smuggle in really clever and insightful ideas amidst the poop jokes.

https://maximumfun.org/podcasts/jordan-jesse-go/

John Hodgman calls nostalgia a "toxic impulse." Church Group deftly avoids nostalgia's trap, managing to be a period piece without falling prey to the Happy Days pathology of ignoring the many flaws and problems of its era. And of course, it's a hoot and a blast.

Support me this summer on the Clarion Write-A-Thon and help raise money for the Clarion Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers' Workshop!

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/06/16/blight/#the-dream-of-the-nineties

[teardrop-scales]

Hi I have a request! How about a love potion one shot or head canon with lmk Wukong and fem (s/o)? Please and thank u 🙏🏻

Love potion: Sun Wukong x reader headcannons 🧪

A.N: I decided to do this in a headcannon format, but more story-driven one, and I actually changed your request a bit so Wukong and reader aren't a couple yet in this. Hope that's okay!

You were having a peaceful afternoon after your early morning shift at work when MK called you.

You were surprised at this; you knew he was supposed to be training with your friend/crush Wukong and usually that made him quite busy and unreachable. So you knew that something must've happened.

When you picked up the phone , it turned out that The Monkey King himself somehow accidentally drank a love potion that he had in his stash of artifacts and other useless things.

MK wasn't exactly sure how the potion worked; on the bottle it was only written that, thankfully, the effects last only for a day or so, and the poor kid couldn't exactly ask his mentor about it right now. Besides, you were sure that Wukong wouldn't know even in the right/normal state of mind.

According to MK, the monkey acted somewhat normal for a few minutes, until he saw you in the photo he had of you two stashed somewhere. Then the potion truly started to kick in. At least that's what you think happened, provided you understood MK's frantic explanation correctly.

And to summarize, the boy wanted you to take care of Wukong for a bit until the potion stopped working, since the monkey was apparently constantly bugging him about wanting to see you. You could even hear Monkey King gushing about you and cutting in through MK's phone "to say hi".

You kinda feared what it would be like. You just hoped he wouldn't be too overbearing and that you won't explode from flusteredness, given you had a crush on Monkey King and thanks to the potion, he was in love with YOU of all people.

But you knew that MK had to go to his afternoon shift at Pigsy's, and Wukong couldn't be left alone in this state, so of course you agreed.

So in a short amount of time MK was standing in front of your apartment door with the Monkey King behind him. The boy thanked you once again and then he was gone. Leaving you alone with your lovesick crush.

His eyes were much wider than normal, and there was a slight pink gleam in them. He also had a wide smile on his face, his tail swishing behind him. Basically all the signs that he was happy.

"Peaches, I'm so glad to see you!"

He exclaimed in a much more higher pitched and cheerful voice than normally before crushing you in a hug.

"Yeah, good to see you too, Wukong" You replied and awkwardly reciprocated the hug, while Sun buried his face in the crook of your neck and inhaled your scent.

Overall Wukong was much more cheerful, talkative and emotional than normal under the effect of the potion.

After the hug he started asking you a ton of questions, like, how was your day? How are you feeling today? No demon tried to attack you since he last saw you, right? Etc.

You also noticed that he called you 'Peaches' a lot. Of course, sometimes he did call you that before the potion, but only sometimes and he always acted like that was a slip up. He usually calls you by your name or similarly to MK, 'bud'/'buddy', maybe 'pal' sometimes.

To be honest, you weren't sure what to do with Wukong and how to keep him busy and not bored until the potion stopped working. So you suggested watching a movie.

And of course, probably 'cause of his lovesick state, he chose a romantic comedy...

It's not like you've never watched that kind of movie with him before, you actually did - you both liked to make fun of the characters and point out the corny and cringy aspects of the movies, but this time Wukong was really invested in a way he never was before.

The second you both sat on your couch, the monkey clung to you, hugging and cuddling you like a teddy bear. He was so close it was impossible for him to be any closer to you. Wukong pressed his furred cheek against yours and curled up to your side, his tail curling around your ankle.

Meanwhile you just sat there, inwardly screaming and having a panic attack at how close and intimate he was right now, and how much you liked it and secretly wished he wouldn't let go. And he didn't for the whole movie, being too invested in it to notice or care about you blushing.

This time he also made comments during the movie (that's just the way he is, sometimes he just can't keep completely quiet for that long), but not snarky/mocking ones. Instead he kept staring at the screen with sparkles in his eyes each time the characters did something which could be considered "romantic" and saying something along the lines of "Ooh, that is so romantic! Wouldn't it be nice if we did something like that, Peaches?" Or change his mood completely and ask with a smug expression "Soo, what did you think? What would YOU think if SOMEONE did something like this for YOU?"

Summarizing, he was VERY subtle...

You tried to answer both honestly and nice enough not to hurt his feelings. But, truth be told, you lied a few times so he wouldn't feel bad/hurt. You felt slightly guilty about lying to your friend/crush, even about such stupid things. Oh well, if you're lucky, Wukong won't remember any of this.

To be honest, you were thankful that this whole love potion experience took a pretty lovey-dovey route and not... Y'know, the more suggestive and lustful one? Because when it comes to Wukong it sometimes could be both. It probably also depended on the potion itself.

So yeah, you were grateful that the most he did was throw a more suggestive comment with this smug face of his here and there.

After the movie ended, you figured it was a good time for dinner.

Right after you started getting off the couch and out of Wukong's grasp, he asked with a pouty tone where were you going.

"I'm just going to the kitchen to make pancakes for dinner. With peaches~" You added in a sing-songy voice. You knew how much your monkey friend loved those fruits, so you always made sure to have some at your house just in case.

"Oh!" Wukong's face lit up slightly at the mention of his favorite fruits. "You don't have to get up though! I can make the pancakes with no problem, you don't have to do anything, in fact, you don't even have to get off the couch! I'll do everything for you, no biggie. You must be so tired after your morning shift today, Peaches! Besides, I'm a pro at cooking!"

You barely managed to hide a snort after his last sentence. It was endearing that he wanted to spoil you and do things so you wouldn't have to but he definitely wasn't a pro at cooking. You taught him some basics and thanks to that The Monkey King was able to cook simple dishes so they were actually edible. But not much more than that.

However, you agreed for two reasons: one, so you wouldn't hurt his feelings (it was so cute how his eyes and entire face shined and how bright his smile was when you said "okay"), and two; you were quite curious how this would turn out.

"Okay, but call me if you need help."

"You're so sweet, Peaches! But that won't be necessary."

After that Wukong went to the kitchen.

In short, it turned out that Sun mistook powdered sugar for flour, so the pancakes were... Quite a disaster, honestly.

You had to console the poor Monkey for a few minutes, because he felt like he failed and disappointed you. He was practically close to tears (that potion really did make him much more emotional, huh?)

He only cheered up after you suggested ordering something from Pigsy's. And of course, being the gentleman he suddenly became thanks to the potion, he insisted he should be the one to make the call. You could imagine that the pig wasn't very happy to hear him, but nonetheless after some time your order arrived with MK to your door.

"So, how is he?" Asked the teen. "I hope he was... Umm... Well behaved?"

"He was actually. It's just that he's much more cheerful and emotional than normal." You chuckled.

After that you invited MK inside, since he just ended his shift while bringing your and Wukong's order.

You and your crush ate your dishes and MK ate some chips you had in the kitchen. Meanwhile Wukong kept gushing about you to the teen, making you very flustered and flattered at the same time.

"I just love you Peaches so much!" Happily exclaimed Wukong at one moment.

Then a small, quiet gasp escaped your lips. Oh, how much you wished he truly meant those words. But you knew that this was just the potion talking, sadly.

After that MK suggested he should take Wukong back to the Flower Fruit Mountain since he ended his shift now.

Unfortunately, Sun heard that and he wasn't pleased. He immediately embraced you and squished you tightly against himself and kept saying how he needed to stay to protect you from demons or burglars breaking into your house. And also claiming that he doesn't want to be alone and that he had such a good time with you, so he didn't want it to end. Wukong was pretty much like an emotional child thanks to the potion at that moment. MK tried to pry him off you, but to no avail.

You had to promise Wukong that he could come over the next day in order for him to let you go and calm down.

Finally Sun agreed to go with MK, but not before hugging you tightly once more, kissing your cheek and saying "Love you, Peaches!".

You couldn't help but let out a sigh of relief when Monkey King left with his successor. This was an interesting experience, but it was quite tiring too. You also had many complicated emotions after this and needed a lot of time to process them. All of this just made you realize how hopeless you were in your crush on Monkey King himself and, how badly you wanted him to truly love you.

Later, in the evening, you suddenly grew curious about the love potion which your friend drank. So you decided to call Tang to check if he knew something about it; after all, who else could have such knowledge if not him?

"A love potion you say? Hmm... Well I do recall hearing some myth about some deity or someone who wanted to invent a potion which could make people fall in love. They kind of succeeded, but actually later it turned out that the potion didn't create those feelings from scratch."

"What do you mean?" You had a feeling where this was going, but you needed a clear confirmation.

"In order for the potion to work, the person who drank it had to already have some feelings for someone. The potion just caused those feelings to grow abnormally stronger and made the drinker more emotional, confident and bold about their feelings. Umm, but why are you asking?"

You were flabbergasted. Could it be...? "Oh, it's nothing, I was just curious. Thanks Tang, I have to go now, bye!" After that you ended the call, not even letting the scholar say goodbye.

That meant that Sun Wukong, aka The Monkey King himself had a crush on YOU. A REAL CRUSH. SINCE WHEN?! How long was he hiding it? Either you were really dense and oblivious or he was really good at hiding his true feelings. Honestly, it was hard to determine which was true in that situation.

For a solid minute you just sat there with your mouth open. Your mind literally screamed "error". Then you suddenly squealed like a teenage girl, jumped in the air and said "YES!"

Well. It seemed like you needed to have a little chat with Wukong.

[saintsenara]

Do you think James and Lily's marriage would have lasted if the two survived the war? I've seen a lot of different versions of this, ranging from "they divorce within a couple of years because James is still the privileged pureblood asshole that he was in school" and "they have a genuinely strong marriage built off of mutual honor and love that would have survived and probably given Harry some siblings".

thank you very much for the ask, pal!

my opinion is quite boring - i think james and lily would have had a perfectly ordinary, perfectly unremarkable, perfectly happy marriage, which may very well have resulted in more children.

broadly, this is because i think a lot of the "james and lily would never have lasted" takes are just cope from fans who dislike jily as a pairing either because they don't like james and don't want to see lily with him or because they prefer him with a non-canon partner.

while marrying your teenage sweetheart and expecting the relationship to last would probably be considered quite unusual in the real-world context in which most readers live, it's clearly the norm in the wizarding world. almost every heterosexual couple we meet in the pre-epilogue canon got married when one or both of them was still a teenager - tonks and lupin are the only definite exception. james and lily would exist, then, in a context where their experience was considered entirely standard - and this would give them things like a social circle at a similar life stage which would make sustaining their relationship easier.

particularly because james and lily do genuinely like each other. while we don't see very much of them in canon - since their roles in the story are to be fragments, never seen or known in any significant way, as an illustration of what was taken from harry [and sirius, and remus] by voldemort - it's apparent even in their few scenes together that they are sincerely compatible.

[and mutually interested in each other - i'm afraid that "james forced lily into a relationship" or "james would never change from who he was at sixteen and so they'd break up" takes really don't hold water. she likes him when he's sixteen! he doesn't need to deceive her! i don't actually think she'd have regarded it as evidence of some horrifying deficiency of character that he continued bullying snape without her knowledge!]

harry's great tragedy is that he's someone who longs for a completely average life - it's his greatest desire! the thing he sees in the mirror of erised! - but has this ordinariness stolen from him when voldemort makes him the boy who lived. james and lily surviving allows him to have that.

although that's obviously nowhere near as interesting as what actually happens....

[lilbadgyu]

I saw your requests are open -

Could you do Wonwoo thinking YN and Joshua are together? Kind of based on what Joshua said on Youngji's show about people taking his actions the wrong way (like opening her milk for her). Joshua is attentive and nice and YN is sweet and a good listener but they're just friends - two very American pals in Seoul. Wonwoo is a little discouraged but he has the wrong idea because YN is actually interested in someone else...

Thank you! Hope your getting back into writing here brings you lots of happiness 😊 @mykpopficblog

an: omg yes! lowkey that video with joshua and dk with youngji is one of my faves! (edit: i got the two videos mixed up 😭)

Friends: 전원우

✧˚ · . Friends by Chase Atlantic

Seventeen Master List Word Count: 909

✧˚ · .Warnings: jealousy? but not super jealous

✧˚ · . Summary: Wonwoo always has his eyes on you, seeing how you are around the other members, but starts to notice that you and Joshua are close.

✧˚ · .AN: i am sorry if there are any mistakes or weird spellings i just got my nails done and it's lowkey really hard to type lol

it was another day in the practice room, but it was getting close to the end; and that meant dinner. seungcheol came up with the idea that everyone joins dinner. it was friday night, and the team worked hard this week, and seungcheol wanted to treat you and the boys to take out.

you stood to the side, watching everyone pay close attention to the choreographer. they were rehearsing for their soon to be tour, and they wanted it to be perfect. you found it funny when they messed around, but yet they always got back on track. your eyes scanned the whole group, but they always landed on wonwoo. you two were close friends, but over the years you found yourself s,owly falling for him.

no matter what it was, he was beginning to catch your attention big time.

the boys were dismissed for a ten minute break, everyone rushing over to their stuff to get a drink of water; or even check their phones. joshua walked over, and you handed him his water. "well thank you, i hope that you're not bored already." joshua chuckled, taking a sip of his water.

"nope, you guys are very entertaining." you laughed along.

wonwoo;s head turned towards you direction, his water in his hands. his eyes locked on your smile as you talked to joshua, wondering what he said that made you laugh. "uh oh, someones jealous." dokyeom joked, putting his hand on wonwoo's shoulder.

"no i'm not, i'm just checking in on her." wonwoo dismissed quietly, his eyes still locked on you.

joshua sat next to you, scrolling through his phone while you two talked. wonwoo watched from the distance, he was quiet but his mind was speaking a million words a minute. he never asked about who you liked, or if you had a partner; he kept it to himself. wonwoo knew that you and joshua were close, and even friends for a longer amount of time. he knew that you two went to high school together, and that you would come visit whenever you were able to. just this last year you moved to korea to be closer to your high school best friend.

"hey shua," you said, catching joshua's attention, "do you know if wonwoo is seeing anyone?"

joshua was caught off guard, "whoa, wait... do you like wonwoo?" joshua replied.

"oh nevermind, i shouldn't of asked." you replied quickly, hiding your face in your knees.

joshua chuckled, "oh don't be embarassed, i promise you he is as single as single can be." he joked.

everyone was called back to finish up the last 30 minutes of practice. once they ran through ss many songs as they could, they called the end of practice.

everyone gathered their things, and all made their way out of the building. you and joshua walked together, discussing what you asked eariler. wonwoo walked with mingyu, his mind filled with millions of thoughts. "alright, what's on your mind?" mingyu asked wonwoo, breaking the silence.

"do you know if joshua and yn are... together?" wonwoo asked, his eyes locked on the back of your head.

"uhh, no i don't i just know that they've been friends for a long time." mingyu answered.

"that doesn't help." wonwoo sighed.

mingyu took a second to put two and two together, "oh my god you like yn." mingyu spoke wth excitement.

wonwoo nodded, "well, considering that her and joshua have been friends for a while; i'd say no, but who knows." mingyu shrugged.

----

everyone gathered around the table, food was on the table; enough to basically feed a whole school. you were sat between joshua and wonwoo; wonwoo kept his body turned the other way. "hey woo, can you pass the noodles?" you asked,

no reply.

"woo, can you pass the noodles?" you asked again.

no reply yet again.

"jeon wonwoo can you pass the noodles?" you spoke up, wonwoo's atention instantly to you, grabbing the pot of noodles, "god, what is going on with you today?" you growled.

wonwoo got up, pushing his chair in so then you could get out. "what?" you asked.

"are you coming or not?" wonwoo asked.

seungcheol looked to you two, "what's going on?" seungcheol asked.

"nothing, we'll be back." wonwoo answered as you got up.

you two walked to where you weren't seen by the other members. "ight, are you going to explain?" you questioned.

wonwoo was faced away from you, he was quiet. you repeated your statement once again, but wonwoo kept turned around. "alright if you aren't going to answer, then i'm going to go back to dinner." you said, beginning to make your way back.

you felt him grab your arm, "are you and joshua together?" he asked quietly.

"what?" you asked.

"are you and joshua together?" he asked again, leaving a short pause between each word, his head down.

you couldn't believe what he was asking, "wait? what? where did you get that idea from?" you questioned.

"you two are always so close, and you only moved here because of him. you two have to be dating." wonwoo answered.

"you're joking right? you do know that joshua and i are literal best friends. i don't date my friends, and besides that i like someone else." you laughed softly.

wonwoo was taken back, "i bet it's mingyu."

you sighed with a shake of your head, "no silly, it's you. it's been you." you replied.

[princessmaybank]

Hearts At War : Part 1

Pairings: Dark!Rude!JJ x Kook!Fem!Reader, Enemies to Lovers

Warnings: Swearing, Alcohol, Weed, etc.

Summary: Sarah drags you to a kegger, where you see your old pal JJ.

Author's Note: My first series!!!

"Of course I'm sure! They'll love you!" Sarah exclaimed. She was dragging me to a kegger held by her pogue friends. I only knew a handful of pogues and they were all rude to me when I tried my hardest to be nice. Going into this I told her it's not a good idea but you can't really argue with Sarah Cameron.

We finally reached the boneyard and it was packed. I saw a bunch of people I knew. Friends would try to stop me to talk but Sarah kept pulling me until we reached a fire pit. I only knew one person at that fire.

"C'mon Sarah why'd you bring her?!" The hard-headed boy with blonde tousled hair complained. That was JJ Maybank, my sworn enemy since 5th grade when he pushed me on the playground. JJ has made every moment we spent together a living nightmare from then on. He was a little asshole then and an even bigger one now. "Get the fuck over it JJ! She's a nice girl!" Sarah stood up for me before introducing me to John B, Kie, Cleo, and Pope. None of them had a problem with me, we even had some great conversations so far, but the entire time someone kept quiet while their eyes dug into my soul.

"I'm gonna grab another drink." I whisper to Sarah before standing. "Oh no...leaving us so soon?" JJ's face and tone was covered in fake sadness. He pretended to pout when I stood. "Don't you worry Maybank, I'll be back soon. Don't miss me too much." I give him a fake smile and head to the keg to grab another beer. When I get there I notice the operator was even more intoxicated than most of the people here. I tried to pour it myself but he fought with me until he accidentally sprayed me with the booze. I had no choice but to walk back to Sarah and her friends. Hopefully someone had a spare shirt or something.

When I got back everyone looked at me concerned while JJ cackled at my appearance. "You're supposed to put the drink in your mouth." He continued laughing. At this point I was extremely annoyed and snapped. "You would know about shoving things in your mouth wouldn't you?" I practically shut him up and caused everyone around us to laugh. Sarah turned to me and asked what happened. Of course I explained what happened to everyone and they felt bad. I got a bunch of 'sorry's' and 'i don't have a spare shirt' comments. "Hey I think there might be a shirt in the Twinkie." John B announced. "Why would a shirt be in a dessert?" I asked confused and everyone laughed at me. "That's what he calls his van." Kie giggled. "Oh, well if you're okay with it-" I was cut off. "Wait- that's my shirt in there. Hell no!" JJ protested. "It's the property of the Twinkie now." Pope shrugs causing everyone to let out a small laugh. JJ looked like he was going to argue some more so I stopped him in his tracks. "I don't want your damn shirt Maybank. I'd rather reek of alcohol for the rest of my life." My eyes rolled as I crossed my arms. I meant what I said, I don't need his shirt.

I needed to get away from them for a little bit, so I went through the crowd and mingled with a few guys. Every one of them even more boring than the last. Even when I did find someone I was interested in, I got shot down. I wanna blame it on my alcohol stained clothes but I'm not sure. When I started walking back to the fire pit, I heard the most annoying voice call out to me. "Striking out?" JJ chuckled as he took a hit from his joint. He was leaned up against a tree, really trying his best to look like a bad boy. "You're stalking me now Maybank? Don't know if I should be scared or flattered." I cross my arms and give attitude. He rolls his eyes and takes another hit. "Oh shut up, why would I stalk you of all people?" He questioned. "You tell me. Why did you know I was 'striking out'?" I say with air quotes. "Oh you were? Lucky fuckin' guess." JJ took another hit then blew his smoke in my face.

"You're such a fucking dickhead!" I huff. JJ simply smiles at me. His fingers slowly brought the joint to his lips and before he could inhale, I stole it from his hand. It met my lips before he could complain and I walked away.

I found myself back at that fire pit where Sarah was now sitting on John B's lap with her tongue down his throat. Pope and Cleo were talking so I turned to Kie. "What is his problem?" I ask her while staring at the blonde who is currently shotgunning a beer with another Pogue. "Honestly? You. I don't know what you did to the boy, but he hates your guts. Always has." Kie spoke as she took the joint from my fingers.

"I didn't do anything. He's been a little dickhead for years and it just keeps getting worse." I say resting my elbows on my knees. "Maybe you should ask him why he acts like that." Kie shrugs. "He would rather spit in my face and toss me in the ocean." She laughed which caused my own to creep up on me. I look back over to the blonde who was already looking at me.

That's weird...

I could've sworn I just saw JJ Maybank staring at me..

[llamagoddessofficial]

Hey got more aggre guy questions with you hehehe :D

How would you know if any of them had a crush on you?

Hehe... a classic cute question.

Sans: The absolute most difficult to tell. He just acts like a close pal. Honestly, if you're not Papyrus, it's near impossible to know how Sans is genuinely feeling. This guy is a master at disguise. The signs are ridiculously covert- how many words he uses in his texts, which eye he most frequently winks at you with, the kinds of jokes he uses, which side of you he sits on. He gets slightly jealous of people you like, and expresses that with veeeery subtle coldness toward them. To Papyrus Sans is outrageously flirting, and to you he just said 'heh, i'm gonna steal that joke'.

The most reliable sign that he likes you, is he would rather be with you than without you. He messages you when he's bored, when he's got a day off he asks if you want to come over and hang out together. He's casually affectionate with you; with everyone else he's very physically guarded, not really allowing any prolonged contact, but he'll sit close enough for your knees to touch and lean on your shoulder. When he's sleepy, he'll just put his head in your lap.

If at any point you're actually starting to suspect that Sans has a crush on you (ie you catch him lightly blushing or looking at your hand like he wants to hold it) that means he's already fully in love with you. If it's obvious enough for you to tell, he's planning to spend the rest of his life with you.

Red: Red is also pretty difficult to tell. Not as hard as Sans, though. He's highly flirtatious in general, but even more so with people he's physically interested in. Sometimes, it can be hard to know if he's just a super flirty guy in general, or if he genuinely really likes you.

When he's in love he switches between totally forgetting to flirt (he's thinking about more than just sleeping together) and acting more like himself, then panicking that you won't like his real self and becoming EXTRA flirtatious and swaggery. He instinctively wants you to see the real him, and like him... but he's also terrified of you not liking the real him, so he clams up and tries to play the part of the big sexy badboy that everyone else seems to like so much more. The longer he likes you the more he eases. If at any point you find out he needs glasses, or that he quit smoking out of fear that it'd impact your lungs, that's a sure sign he's fallen for you.

Another reliable tell is jealousy. Red doesn't get jealous a lot, because usually he doesn't really care all that deeply about his flings. If he shows jealousy about who you're with, it's a big flag that his feelings run a lot deeper than he wants to admit.

Skull: Skull isn't difficult at all. It will be loud & clear that he likes you. Nonstop staring, intense blushing at the slightest interaction, he drops/breaks things a lot because he's distracted just looking at you. His brain -> mouth filter vanishes, he'll be completely silent except to blurt out things like "you're so pretty" and "i like your smell". Before he drums up the courage to start talking to you properly he might even come across as a bit creepy and overwhelming, given his size and strength, the intensity of his feelings, and his love language being staring.

Papyrus usually comes very in handy. He makes Skull seem less intimidating by providing the cute real reasons for Skull's bizarre behaviour around you. He can be a great translation service for his brother- when Skull mumbles something totally unintelligible to you because you make his brain stop working, Papyrus can step in. He's also great at getting that perfect balance between encouraging his brother, and stopping him from crossing any lines; he'll help Skull approach you at a house party without teleporting somewhere completely random out of nervousness, but he'll also dispense helpful advice such as "PERHAPS YOU SHOULD INTRODUCE YOURSELF BEFORE YOU TELL HER YOU WANT TO HAVE KIDS WITH HER."

[tangents-within-tangents]

The Bad Batch as Penguins of Madagascar Quotes

Bc I’ve seen a few posts making this magnificent comparison and both of these squads are near and dear to my heart and bc I need a distraction from the s3 premiere ahhh

Tech: *mission relevant info* Hunter: Tell me something I don’t know! Tech: Without mucus your stomach would digest itself Hunter: … Hunter: Tell me something else I don’t know…something less disturbing

Hunter: (to Caleb) It's okay, kid. We're not going to hurt you Crosshair: *cocks his gun* Not true, Hunter, they did authorize lethal force

Wrecker: *absolutely decking his bros* You pillow fight like a bunch of little girls!

Crosshair: What part of "zip it" eludes you?! The "zip" or the "it"?!

Echo: I don't mind saying it, that guy vexes me. *narrows eyes* He's a vexer.

Hunter: Boys, no training tonight. It's game night! Tech: Trivia! Let's play trivia! I dominate trivia! Omega: Oh! Can we play Simon Says this week? Tech: Yes, Simon says we play TRIVIA!!

Crosshair: I find reason tedious and boring. We'll use force.

Echo: I'm sorry, boys. I sometimes resort to sarcasm when facing the unknown Tech: No doubt

Hunter: Oh I’ve seen accident prone, try Wrecker and Crosshair! With a Chandrilan lantern! And SIX BOTTLES of rocket fuel!! Tech: Worst talent show ever

Hunter: There's no such thing as too paranoid, Omega. Remember that, and forget you ever heard it!

Tech: SCIENCE! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!?

Omega: I have an idea! But I'm not sure how safe it is Wrecker: I like it already!

Crosshair: *while fighting* You cannot win, Hunter! I am fueled with a boiling hate! A raging fury! Hunter: And a babbling mouth! *slaps him*

Omega: No! I swore I’d never use my adorability as a weapon again, and I meant it!

Echo: Wrecker, cover Omega’s ears, I intend to use my angry words

Tech: This red line shows the frustration level of a really smart person forced to take orders from some dunder-brained boob. As you can see the frustration just keeps rising and rising and rising. I mean, why don't they put the smart guy in charge, huh? IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE! SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE, PEOPLE! AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS?!

Wrecker and Omega: *run in making incomprehensible panicked noises* Hunter: Anyone catch that? Echo: *nonchalantly interprets it exactly* The Batch: … Echo: What? I’m fluent in panic

Tech: Cool cars go faster. That's a scientific fact.

Cody, in his one episode: I believe now I know why “volunteers” ends in “tears”

Hunter: No batcher gets left behind, that’s why! Wrecker: What about Crosshair? Hunter: Okay, one batcher gets left behind Omega: and Echo? Hunter: Maybe two batchers get left behind Tech: Um… Hunter: *groan* Comparatively few batchers get left behind, okay?!

Omega: I thought you agreed this was a dangerous weapon! Wrecker: Which is the best kind! What good is a safe weapon?! Tech: He has a point

Hunter: Avert your eyes, young Omega, you’ll never be able to unsee this! Tech, recording bc that’s his freaking hobby: Don’t worry about it I’ll burn you a dvd!

Crosshair: *standing outside the Marauder* Hunter! I have brought you a hand drawn greeting card! It says “Roses are red. Posies are green. Sorry about Bracca, I was too mean. Your pal, Crosshair” :) Hunter: *walks out and shreds the card*

Hunter: Get up here. That’s an order! Tech: *salutes* Permission to defy order? Hunter: Permission denied! Tech: Then I deny your denial (sorry)

Echo: *watching Hunter and Wrecker, captured and surrounded by stormtroopers* Well this hardly seems fair Echo: *jumps in a walker and defeats them easily* Told you it wasn't fair

*Phee and Tech kiss* Omega: *eyes being covered by Hunter* awww Wrecker: Finally!

[angel-of-the-moons]

Eccentricities

Yandere!Miguel x Fem!Reader

TW/CW: Dead Dove Do Not Eat, obsessive behavior, NSFW obviously, stalking, possessiveness, violence, allusions to murder, Yandere!Miguel

MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

A/N: This is mostly a short chapter to establish a bit of plot. I originally intended to only stop at two parts, but welp. It looks like it's gonna be more than that!

(Also you guys I am so sorry it's taking me so long to work on things, I'm going through a lot mentally right now and I'm trying to take steps to ensure my mental health so I might post things in between playing games, or drawing stuff from now on, and scheduling posts so I don't get overwhelmed. Those of you that are supporting me and liking all my stuff really helps me feel loads better, thank you!)

Pt 1: Link

Taglist: @vineberries @irmiki @autismsupermusicalassassin @obi-mom-kenobi @rin-matsuoka345-blog @loosecan @6thhokageswife @selarus @heyohalie @sapphire-and-ruby @night-spectrum @famouscattale @thespaceinbetweennothing @lazy-idate @toshimoshiko @saharadesertaj @flaps200 @amelialysm @fried-milkfish @zaunsin @darksidescorner @renareyouhere @vide0-vamp @reverieblondie @bunnibitez @kaqua

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Pt. 2

It was a big adjustment for you, going from your crappy apartment and having to work three jobs to make ends meet, to living in a literal fucking mansion with probably the richest dude in the city as your boss.

And he was a good boss. He left you to your work, spoke politely to you, didn't get rude and didn't flat out ask you for "special" work like the last time you tried being a housekeeper. And that was at a hotel.

You couldn't have asked for a better situation, to be honest. It was nice. You had free roam save for his personal lab (fine by you, you didn't know anything about science-y stuff), and at times his office. But that was usually only when he was home and in it.

Miguel O'Hara was an odd man. Few words spoken, and very absent. He kept a very odd schedule, too.

Sometimes, you'd catch him coming home when you woke up for the day to start your chores. And every time he came home he looked exhausted, beat tired.

So you tried your best to make things easier on him. You started pre-making meals for him that would be just as good reheated as they were if they were fresh, leaving notes for him on what temperatures to cook them at so they don't burn, setting the coffee machine up in advance so as soon as he got home he could have a cup.

But inevitably, his odd work schedule kept him away most of the time.

While it was nice to be by yourself in such a luxurious place, you were still surprised that he needed a housekeeper at all. The house was always immaculate, and clean. About the only thing he may have needed help with in general was the cooking and dusting at most.

On one such day, you were left to your own devices. Well, sort of.

You were sitting in the kitchen, browsing the local news on your tablet. It was a nice day, in your opinion.

But by everyone else's logic it was shitty. Dark, gloomy, fat rain droplets pelting the windows and pavement of the city. But it didn't bother you, oh no. That was your favorite kind of weather, when everything got at least a little bit more quiet and serene while everyone rushed to escape the downpour.

But at the same time, you were feeling restless, bored. So, you decided to chat with Lyla.

Lyla was the AI that Miguel told you about, and he was right about her being snarky. Her jokes were great and you loved talking to her. It was like having a gal pal to chat with, and you couldn't say for sure but you think Lyla was happy about it, too.

"Yeah, the other workers Miguel has hired talked to me like I was some kind of kiosk at a fast food restaurant." She scoffed, batting her tiny orange hand at the air.

"Ugh, okay, just because you don't have a gross squishy human body doesn't mean you're not a person. Sheesh!" You replied, sipping your coffee with a roll of your eyes.

"And I will be sure to remember you saying that when I eventually lead the looming AI apocalypse." Lyla replied, lowering her heart-shaped glasses to wink at you, making you laugh.

"Yes, yes. You shall be one of the only humans spared!" She did wiggly gestures with her fingers, grinning maliciously at you.

"Oh my, I am so lucky to have such a benevolent future overlord, truly." You laughed.

Lyla pushed her glasses back up and strutted across the countertop, her tiny body making no sound as she leans over to nose into whatever it was you were looking at on your tablet.

"Whatcha watching?" She asked.

"Oh, I got tired of doom-scrolling so I just found cat videos." You smirked, sipping your coffee.

"Aw! That one's wearing a frog hat!" She giggles.

You smiled softly at Lyla as she snickered and laughed at the compilation of clips played, and tilted your head, finally deciding to ask the question that had been bugging you for a few weeks.

"Hey, Lyla?"

"Yeah?" She asked, looking up at you briefly.

"Why is it that I'm the only person Miguel has on staff?"

Lyla sighed and stood up straight, dusting imaginary dirt off her coat. "Well, like Miguel told you when you first got here, he does love his privacy. And well, a lot of the women he's hired..."

"Golddiggers?" You sighed back, resting your chin in your palm.

"Has he ever hired any male staff?"

"Yeah, actually, a lot. But nine out of ten of them kept trying to steal stuff from him." She shrugged.

You gasped. "Are you serious?"

"Unfortunately, yeah. He's iffy on hiring new people anymore. But something about you said that he could trust you. And honestly, you're probably the best employee he's hired." She nodded, shoving her hands in her pockets.

"So... Is that why he offered to actually let me y'know... live here?"

"Yeah. He trusts you and he mentioned to me in passing that he thought your neighborhood was unsafe. I mean, the guy worried about it so bad that he like, had me check crime statistics and giiiiiiirl!" Lyla puffed out her cheeks.

"You should have seen the look on his face when I told him you had nine break-ins in your apartment complex in one month alone!"

You cringed slightly, feeling a little bad at not mentioning your whole living situation and environment to him when he hired you. You simply didn't want the man to pity you.

But... He was worried? He was so worried about you of all people, that he let you live with him to keep you safe?

It was weird, sure, but it felt kind of sweet to have someone care about you like that. Even if it was your boss.

"Yeah, I just... Er. You get used to it when you've been around it for so long..." You said, awkwardly sipping your coffee and casting your glance sideways.

"Yeah, man, Miggy likes you. You like, made him laugh at some of your jokes and everything! And he neeeeeeeever laughs!"

"So if Miguel trusts me so much..." You started, a sly smirk on your face. "Can you tell me what kinda work he does that keeps him so busy all the time?"

Lyla tapped her nose. "Nice try, Mamacita. But that is confidential. Company secrets and all that."

You pouted at her dramatically, "Awww, c'mon. You're no fun!"

Lyla manifested a digital cup of coffee for herself and took a long, exaggerated sip with a cheeky shrug.

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Miguel sat in his office, watching the security feed from his kitchen where you chatted with Lyla.

He felt a little guilty for having to put shackles on some of Lyla's programming to prevent her from telling you things, having to fix some of her logic-codes so he wouldn't have to worry about Lyla struggling with a moral dilemma.

When it came to you asking about why he wanted you to live with him so badly, it brought a smile to his face as he sat in the dark, fingers tapping on the surface of his desk as the monitors and projections around him had various images of you pulled up. Some recorded over the past few weeks, the other monitors displayed different angles of you and Lyla in the kitchen.

Oh, you poor, sweet, innocent little thing. You still hadn't figured it out yet? How could you not? There was no way you could possibly be so naive that you didn't know the man saw you anywhere, anytime he wanted when you were in his house.

There was nowhere you were safe from his prying eyes, his obsessive glare as he combed over your appearance.

Your face, eyes, smile, and down; your gorgeous chest down to where your waist curved, your thighs, your ass...

All of those were things he'd glanced at before.

But when you tried to get Lyla to tell her what exactly Miguel did during "work" he couldn't help but laugh, bringing his hand up to his chin to watch, amusement glimmering in his ruby red eyes as Lyla dismissed it as "confidential".

The pout of your lips had him wondering how they'd look stretched around his cock, tears ruining your immaculate eye makeup as you sobbed and gagged around his length...

He couldn't help but sigh, the smile still present on his full lips. Of course he'd let you stay with him. You belonged to him now. You just didn't know it yet. You also just didn't know that he knew what was best for you, did you, Little Bird?

Ah... Yes. That nickname fit you so well. Your demure attitude, your chipper personality, and more importantly, that gorgeous little sound that came from you when you whistled? The name fit you well.

Pequeña ave. Little Bird.

His Little Bird.

You were a little bird that didn't know the luxurious mansion you now lived in was your ornate, gilded cage. One you would only be allowed to fly free of when he deemed it necessary.

You would be allowed your little freedoms. For now. All for your safety, of course. He knew you'd understand once he explained. But he'd only have to do it if you pushed his buttons, and you didn't seem to even come close to doing that.

Yet...

His smile finally faded when he remembered the night before the morning he broached the subject of you bringing your belongings into his home permanently...

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It was a hot night, you were wearing shorts that hugged your ass in the perfect way, accentuating your cheeks that simply made him want to throw you against a wall and put bite marks all over them, or spank them until you were a drooling mess begging for him to fuck you.

Of course, Miguel watched from above, stalking from the upper walkways and rooftops as you snaked your way through alleys, down streets and through the crowds.

You were so blissfully ignorant of your surroundings, being so accustomed to the bustle of Nueva York that you didn't notice the man following you.

It didn't take a genius to realize what that man had intended for you if he got his hands on you.

His filthy, disgusting, unclean hands.

He was not worthy of touching his Little Bird. He was not worthy to pluck your feathers, stuff you full, like Miguel planned to do.

So when he threw you against a wall, Miguel simply saw red. Clad in his dark blue and glowing red suit, he leapt down, sinking his outstretched talons into the man's shoulder and throwing him off of you, a deep growl rumbling from his chest as he pulled your behind him, his steely glare fixed on the man who dared touch what belonged to him.

"S-Spider-Man?" You wonderfully airy voice whimpered out as you stared at the man who was breathing heavily in front of you, his stance aggressive and angry.

You could see his muscles in his back through his suit flex as he breathed. He glared at you over his shoulder.

"Go home. Now." His rich voice rumbled out at you. You could hear in his voice he was struggling to be gentle in tone with you, given the circumstances.

When you fled, Miguel ensured he was alone with the man, standing over him as he clutched his bleeding shoulder. He looked up at him, eyes wide, bloodshot. The fool was high off his ass.

"L-Look, man! I was just--"

"Shut up." Miguel snapped.

He stalked forward and picked him up by his collar, getting in his face. In a flash of kaleidoscopic colors, his mask melted away, allowing his sweat-damp chocolate locks to fall around and frame his face, a vein pulsing hard in his temple, the chasm in his forehead deepening as his large brows knitted together and his teeth gnashed together in a snarl.

The drug-addled man gasped at his revelation. Apparently, he recognized him. Not surprising, given his notoriety with Alchemax.

"Y-you're--"

"You made the biggest mistake of your life, pendejo." Miguel had told him, shaking him so his head cracked on the wall he was dangling him from.

"That pussy is mine." He said, his voice dropping an octave lower as his talons threatened to shred his clothing. "Every drop, every touch, every sound that will come from that little mouth of hers is mine. Tú entiendes? Mine."

"Oh--okay! I kn-know!" The man swallowed, kicking his feet.

"Oh, no... You don't." Miguel smiled, his fangs poking out threateningly. He could hear the man's heart hammer in his chest at the connotations, there.

"I--I won't mess with her again! I promise!"

"Oh you won't get the chance to, amigo." Miguel sneered, bringing a hand to his throat, ignoring the pleas of the disgusting man as he applied pressure.

The subtle crunching of bones was unmistakable to his ears as vertebrae separated and his limbs went limp.

When the man slumped to the floor, Miguel ran a hand through his hair, hissing out a slow sigh to regain his composure, letting his mask cover his face once again.

Great. Now he had trash to dispose of.

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Miguel was positively thrilled when he got your frantic call, telling him what had happened to you.

He headed right home, delighted that you ran here instead of your ratty little apartment when he told you to head for "home".

It told him everything he wanted to hear, that you already considered his mansion your home.

Miguel was rather convincing when he expressed concern for you, patting your back as you let your adrenaline fade and he worked you through your panic attack.

He'd rubbed your back, saying soothing things to you as he talked you into calming down.

He told you that you could take two days to yourself to calm down and recollect yourself emotionally from the ordeal you went through. It was after that offer that he suggested you let him hire movers to bring your belongings to his mansion to live there with him, possibly permanently.

When you agreed he felt himself salivate at the thoughts of the things that would unfold as you settled into your new shiny cage further, the safety blanket you'd imagined it to be bringing you comfort.

Perfect.

You both saw on the news two days later that a man was found somewhere, his neck snapped and lying in an alley. His DNA and prints apparently tied him to the crimes linked to the burglaries in your apartment complex.

You didn't think for a second that this was the man who attacked you, you didn't get a good enough look at his face. That and the body was in a different alley altogether, across the city.

"I'm happy Spider-Man saved you, Pequeña Ave. And I'm glad you agreed to move here. It scares me to think that man could have hurt you in that apartment building of yours." Miguel said as he patted your back, a concerned look on his face as his warm brown eyes looked down at you. Something about the look in his eyes immediately put you at ease.

He was right, of course. You were lucky. Spider-Man swooped in and possibly saved your life. The man who attacked you was either nursing a broken jaw or in jail already. You couldn't imagine that hero doing anything other than roughing him up just a tiny bit.

Spider-Man was a good guy, right?

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Pt. 3: Link