#I'm not good at heropulchure

[xenonsdoodles]

idiots

[inthemiddleofagame]

heropulchure because why not

Send Me a Ship and I’ll Tell You Who: (Obnoxious Edition):

always wins when they play Trivia Crack: Sepulchure has been out of the loop for a while now and I don’t think Trivia is on the must know list of an evil emperor. That being said, after the Hero insists on getting him to play and falling short every time, it’s gonna irk him. To Seppy, I’d bet he’d find it ungodly stupid but he’d get up to date. Once he starts getting better, the Hero would be smug. Hideously smug and on the verge of getting punted out the window when they lean into Seppy’s space with their teasing.  

laughs when their partner trips on something: I imagine it’d be different for these two. If the hero trips, Seppy won’t laugh. He’ll just look with an almost blank expression save for the slight tug at the corner of his mouth and in a way, it makes the Hero fume worse than had he been laughing. If Seppy trips and falls or stumbles, the Hero would press their lips together and stifle their laughing as hard as they could. That is until Seppy tells them to let it out and be done with it. He doesn’t realize that it’s all he’s ever going to hear for a couple of years and then some.

would drop ice down the back of the other’s shirt as a joke: It’d make no sense for the hero to drop ice down the back of Seppy’s whatever-he’s-wearing cause he’s undead. But what they would drop on him is something way worse but all that would do is tickle him a bit. Like some bane of the undead would make him look at the Hero with a flat expression that says ‘really?’ Seppy isn’t one for childish pranks.

spoils the ending of books/movies: Here’s a weird thing I thought of that might be OOC. On the occasion that the hero is engrossed in something and Seppy wants attention, he will never say it out loud. If what has their attention is a book, he will outright spoil it. Then the Hero would look at him, know exactly why he did it, and spoil something right back at him or recite an unflattering line about him from a history book they read. It ends with them on temporary separation.

always posts a picture of the other as their MCM or WCW: The Hero, if Seppy is still regarded and he probably will be for eternity, will never post something like that. Seppy would think that they would but then he’s surprised and quietly miffed that they posted a picture of a puppy instead.

eats the last piece of cake in the fridge before the other can have it: Even if Seppy could eat things, the cake is gone and the Hero would leave a note regardless. 

obnoxiously celebrates Monday Punday every week: The Hero all the way. At first, Sepulchure thought that they would eventually get tired of seeing no reaction from him. Months pass and there is no end. He knew that they were a tenacious fool but this was ridiculous. And then one day, he accidentally makes a pun, realizes his mistake, sees the annoying smile on the Hero’s face, looks out into the void, and accepts death as the Hero beings to climb on to him.

makes loving hack posts on the other’s Facebook, Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter etc: The Hero always initiates and secretly posts the dumbest shit to which Sepulchure has to reply by going on to theirs and make a report about something embarrassing that the Hero did.

has to beat their partner in every game: Call it a force of habit but every game they play is extreme final death match all day all the time. The eternal darkness falls every time the scrabble board is taken out.

keeps their partner up half the night talking about random stuff: The Hero is mostly okay with this but on days when they’re either needy or want to be irritating, the dumbest shit is brought up and Seppy rolls on top of them to make them stop or do something that’s more enjoyable. 

eats too much garlic and tries to kiss their partner anyway: It might not matter cause Sepulchure is literally a walking corpse so the Hero does. They also make a point of bringing up ‘gravedirt breath’ every time they kiss but Seppy sort of gets the last laugh because he’s great at kissing so it hardly matters. Well, technically it’s a win-win situation.

[xenonsdoodles]

Misdirection

I finally posted part of the heropulchure WIP that I’ve been working on. Click for some enemies-to-fake-dating nonsense. I might take constructive criticism. I’ll definitely take offers to fight me (not limited to this, just in general)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18071789

[xenonsdoodles]

I had a vague idea I wanted to work out and they ended up getting a lot angrier than I anticipated

something something implied context bc I don’t know what I’m Doing