#I'm not crazy : 40s verse

[demcnsinmymind]

*+~ end of 40s verse vibes~+*

[moodlesmain]

What I'm Made Of (Sonic Heroes OST) 🤝 With Me (Sonic and the Black Knight OST): Final boss songs who's lyrics apply almost just as much to Sonic as they do to the villain he's facing

[swangtup6]

Mixtape Review: Sematary - Rainbow Bridge 2 (2020)

Another mixtape by Sematary, and probably my 3rd favorite release from him. This is (obviously) the 2nd mixtape in his Rainbow Bridge series and is, in my opinion, the best of the 3. On this mixtape, Sematary moves to a darker, heavier sound and refines the formula from the first.

Starting with the production, this is very "typical" Sematary, building off of the foundation established on RB1. The beats are just about all sampled from black metal, with heavy, bassy trap/drill drums. This mixtape definitely has some of my favorite beats from Sematary. I think on this mixtape he reached a good balance of noisy and heavy, because it's definitely more aggressive than RB1, but it's not as blown out and distorted as RB3. It's like a 60:40 proportion of drill to black metal, and I think it works well.

I also like how Sematary refined his vocal approach and mixing. With the exception of Funeral and Desecration, as they were made immediately after RB1 and therefore sound more like that project, the vocals all have this kind of muddy, buried quality, with the super slurry delivery unique to Sematary. I don't know what it is about how the vocals are mixed on this album, but they just sound so fucking good it drives me crazy.

Speaking of the vocals, i REALLY like the lyrics on this mixtape, Sematary leans really hard into the horrorcore/violence on this one, and I think it's cool as hell, as a death metal / grind fan and former juggalette (i should prolly be more ashamed to admit that but idc). Below are some of my favorite lyrics.

from My Cutter, I like these lines a lot because it's just pure early Sematary. Who else makes drill about candy and energy drinks?

from Red Mist. fuck doc martens

from Duster Huffer, this chorus is so catchy i can't stand it. I see a lot of people calling this a "love song" and i think i kind of agree, but it's like a love song that child Michael Myers from Rob Zombie's 2007 Halloween reboot (phenomenal movie btw) would write

I also think the features on this mixtape are all really good. I think Juju is my least favorite, just because his voice doesn't really match the vibe of the song he's on (Skellingtons) but I still don't hate him, I can fuck with it. Ghost Mountain is amazing as usual, though after hearing him in his absolute PRIME on HAW, he feels a little out of place on more horrorcore-focused releases like this one. Also, sematary got fuckinn underground LEGEND SLUG CHRIST on this which is insane (even tho it was a bought feature, it still goes hard). I love slug christ, and i think his verse on Skinwalker is fantastic, if lyrically unrelated to the rest of the song.

And finally, I want to touch on the atmosphere, which is very important in all of Sematary's music (probably why I don't like a lot of his newer stuff). I am in love with the world this mixtape builds. Not quite as much as that in HAW, but still, this mixtape has great vibes. Some tweaked out (on middleschooler poverty drugs u can buy at walmart) white kid mumbling about killing and mutilating people over these super bassy black metal rap beats is just a sight to behold (is there an auditory equivalent to that saying?) and some combination of Sematary himself, the sound of the music, and the content of the music just creates this almost indescribable energy that I find completely addictive.

(is buddy inside a fishtank in this pic?)^^^

Overall, I think this is one of Sematary's best ever mixtapes. I think it's the peak of the Rainbow Bridge series and anyone who likes underground rap SHOULD check this out. I'm not saying you have to like it, but I think it's worth your time if u value ur chief keef inspired soundcloud gallows.

9.4/10

Standout Tracks: Chandelier, Skellingtons, Red Mist

I'm gonna do reviews for the other 2 rainbow bridge mixtapes for comparison purposes

[charrfie]

howdy laika! for that ask game, spamton with 17, 22, 23, 24?

LONG POST INCOMING PLEASE READY YOURSELF

17. What's a ship for this character you don't hate but it's not your favorite that you're fine with?

See this is a tricky question bc I wouldn't say I truly LIKE any spamton ships really; they all don't work for me for one reason or another. But I'm fine with seeing some* of them regardless because I do view a majority of them as having been a part of his history? Like him and swatch for example. I do not enjoy that ship or actively take part in it but do I think there was something going on there during spamtons big shot years??? Yeah. Do I have a problem with anyone that does enjoy it? No. Kind of a non-answer but it's the best I've got

* = "Some" excluding any addison ships (bc I personally view them as siblings) and also ones that aren't morally gross, obviously

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

OH BOY AM I A FIC READER. For the past month or so as my hyperfixation on spam has ramped up in severity again I've been trying to read every spamton centric fic that's ever been written and wow has it been a journey. So as for what I like!! The easiest answer to this is probably just the general statement of "when people write him how he is in canon." It's surprisingly rare to see him written in such a manner but is always a nice surprise when he is. Not only do I say this in relation to his character as a whole, but his speech patterns too! Which- admittedly- are extremely difficult to get the hang of! So I understand if people aren't super well versed in it and can't write him accurately in that manner. But it's my favorite thing ever when people do.

As for the second part of this question, I think the most glaring thing I hate when it comes to fics about him is just how often he's infantilized. It's SHOCKING how often it happens. Sure sure, he can be silly no doubt about it, but he's a grown man in his 40s and has experienced so much awful shit. Can we knock it off with treating him like he's a newborn or is stupid?? In the same breadth is when people make him excessively kind or sweet right off the bat... like is he not kind of an asshole??? I think its perfectly fine to embrace that fact; him being morally gray adds SO much to his character! Dare I say a lot of people who enjoy his character wouldn't have been intrigued by him without it, so I don't know why that element of his character is so often neglected. Same with his small moments of kindness/humanity; they wouldn't hit as hard if he was like that the whole time. Idk. I'm kind of picky about writing and literature so I have a lot to say sorry lol

23. Favorite picture of this character?

If we're talking about canon art of him only then I will forever be thinking about this gif of him. It makes me crazy. Same with this drawing toby did of him, you people have no idea the damage it does to me

If fan works are included... then this piece by @fatspamton is my absolute favorite picture of spamton EVER and it has been for the longest time, no question about it. It's exactly how I see him in my head and he looks so charming in it T_T <3 All of this artists spamton art (and other art/music too!!) is absolutely worth looking at if you ask me; the way he draws spam is unbelievably perfect, I think about all of its works of him very often :"^]

24. What other character from another fandom of yours reminds you of them?

Going to be honest I've been stumped on this one. I don't think I have any answer?? There's no guy that takes up my brain space which is similar enough to him for me to say in full confidence "yeah x is like him," sorry!

[boysplanetrecaps]

Build Up Episode 0: Getting to Know the Boys Part 3: Team Power

Hey, friends! Welcome back to this crazy project I set out for myself -- writing up a bit about each of the 40 contestants on MNET’s Build Up before I dive into the recaps. Last post, I covered Team Soul. This post will be about Team Power. Let’s do it!

Same caveats apply: 1) I’m pressed for time, so proofreading will suffer; please be kind! 2) screencaps will be awkward due to technological issues and 3) All of these guys are amazing vocalists; my critique is splitting hairs and just my opinion at the end of the day. 

Choi Haram

I also have almost no information about Haram, except that he’s a musical actor. In his teaser, V08, I Want to Fall in Love  by Johan Kim, he sings in that classical “musical actor” way, which is just not my favorite style of singing. That doesn’t make it bad! He also is singing a ballad. Which does mean it’s bad! Ha ha, jk.

I'll do my best to evaluate him even though the song is a ballad. I'm a hero, right? His soft tone he uses in the verses is just too breathy and nasal for my taste. But I do like the belt on the chorus part -- nice work. This guy definitely knows how to sing. I wonder what he’ll sound like singing more of a pop song. 

Kim Minseo

This is Kim Minseo, 21, who also appeared on a show I’d never heard of called “The Origin - A, B, or What?” It “was a new type of survival program that combines balance games along with K-pop,” whatever THAT means, and it created the group ATBO. On the Wikipedia page for that show, it says that he was born in January of 2003, making him 21 now, and it also says that he lived in China for ten years and can speak Chinese. I wonder if he and Wumuti will ever speak some Chinese together? 

I really, really liked his teaser performance of Rolling in the Deep by Adele (V39), slight pronunciation issues aside. It was actually kind of cute how he sort of just gave up on pronouncing ‘underestimate’ halfway. He has a distinct, real voice that shows some training but also some rough edges. For me, he’s one to watch. Watch? Listen to? Whatever. 

Yoon Inhwan

Yoon In-Hwan, V23, is one of the enigmas of the show -- I have no information about him. For me, his mini audition showed an unpleasantly throaty, nasal, thick vocal color that I didn’t exactly love. He sounded like he had just drunk a whole gallon of milk or something. I don’t know if that’s how he always sings, or if he just was feeling unwell that day or what. As promised, he did have a lot of power, and he also had a good sense of pitch. Hopefully he’ll do better going forward!

Jo Hwanji

I haven’t been able to get a decent screengrab thus far, but Hwanji is the guy in the uniform in episode 1. He’s only 24 -- isn’t that surprising? Before this, he went on other shows called Phantom Singer 3 and Fantastic Duo 2.

He’s another musical actor, but in his teaser song V26 he breaks the musical actor mold by singing an upbeat retro swing song by JYP -- yes, that JYP -- called Swing Baby. I like the song, and I also like the way he sings it. Clean but full, with fun little growls to brighten things up, varied dynamics, impeccable pitch, and the power he promised. Good stuff! He’s also so hilariously square. I mean it literally. He looks like a Pixar character. It’s cute. I'm looking forward to hearing more from him.

Lim Junhyeok

Junhyeok, age 30, debuted as part of the JYP-based k-band Day6 in September 2015, singing and playing keyboards. In late 2015, it was revealed that he’d been chatting with a female fan online, and that they might have been dating. The controversy built, and he felt obligated to leave the group in February 2016, getting to enjoy less than six months with the group. God, that must have been just heart wrenching for him. I can’t imagine.

Afterward, he joined another band called Be Blossom, but stayed only about a year. Since then, he was on a survival show called The Unit, which was about rebooting debuted idols’ careers. (A few other contestants of Build Up also went on The Unit, too.) He also continues to compose music, which I think is actually his first love. 

His teaser song performance, V05,  was I Love You by Shin Hyo Bum, and you can see in the silhouette that he’s playing the keyboards as he sings. I didn’t love his performance, unfortunately. It felt a little shrieky to me at times, and his softer notes were a little too breathy for my taste. He definitely belongs in the Power group, though. He can sure belt when he wants to -- it’s the softer segments that challenge him. Maybe it’s just my bias against ballads acting up, as well. 

It’s kind of a bummer, because for whatever reason, I like him. I can’t help but cheer for a guy who (a) was kicked out of his group after six months for dating, like, omg, how dare a young person want to date! (b) is a bit on the older side (c) composes music and plays instruments and most importantly (d) shows up to a survival show in a goddamn hoodie. Like, yes, king. So I hope that I grow to like his vocals better as I hear more from him. 

Side note: The Korean family name “Lim” is often transliterated as “Im” since that’s actually closer to how it’s pronounced. So if you see his family name written as “Im,” that’s why. (Nayeon from Twice has the family name of Lim/Im -- hence her album name.)

Park Jeup

Park Jeup makes himself known by wearing an enormous bow on the first day. It’s just such a choice, when he’s so masculine looking. Own it! Yes!

Anyway, he’s 30, and is a member of IMFACT. He’s been on a bunch of singing shows, as well as The Unit, which would have put him in company with Lim Junhyuk (former Day6) and Hyukjin from Fave1.

His group IMFACT debuted in January 2016 and put out several albums and singles, but none of their songs have even one million views on Youtube. Most of them don’t even break 500,000 views. In 2022, all the members of IMFACT left their agency (Star Empire). The group hasn’t officially disbanded, but the members are listing themselves as soloists. They really weren’t a bad group, and it’s a shame that they never caught on, but it’s just such a crowded landscape. Their song Only You spent some time on my playlist a few years back, and Jeup’s voice in that song is really sweet. 

I tried my best to give his teaser song a try -- he was V34 --  but I just dislike ballads so much that I can’t judge him fairly. Vocally, though, he sounds well trained. He has a surprisingly high pitched timbre considering his appearance. 

Here is a performance he did in 2018, in which he made the MNET reaction editors play the instant replay buttons like a xylophone. I think there was some sort of gas leak in the studio that day, because, yeah, his voice is nice but people are having spasms in their excitement and it’s a bit much. Also, he's singing another ballad so it's kind of a no from me.

A song that’s a bit more palatable for me is this cover of Exo’s Monster on The Unit. 

Jeup doesn’t seem to be the main vocal, but he is the one who sings “I’m sorry…. You make me… so crazy, you know you do.” He also does the higher harmony line/descant/whatever it is over the “Come here girl, you… call… me… monster” line. And he pulls it off!

I recognize Jeup’s skill, technique, and passion for the art. I’m not as sure that I love his timbre for whatever reason. I hope his voice grows on me, in part because I always have a soft spot for hard working nugu idols, and in part because I always gravitate toward the older, more broad shouldered idol types, like Baekho from NU’EST and Wyatt from ONF. Jeup, fighting!

Hyukjin

Hyukjin is 30 and is from a group called Fave1, where he’s lead vocal and lead dancer. He also appeared on The Unit, so he may also know Park Jeup and Lim Junhyuk.

Ok, so his background is kind of sad, fam.

His first group, 100%, debuted in 2012, so he’s been at this a while. There were originally seven members, but two quit, and then one member, the leader Minwoo, passed away in 2018. That had to be so hard on Hyukjin and the rest of the team, to lose not just their friend and teammate but also their leader. The group disbanded in 2021, and three of the four remaining members formed Fave1 at a new agency. So they’re kind of like Loosemble or Vivez that way. 

100% started off doing ok -- their older songs had 1 or 2 million views, good for the time period -- but their more recent songs max out at around 400,000 views. Fave1, unfortunately, is really not doing nearly as well as even 100%. Their songs usually have views measured in the thousands, and their videos look like they were shot on someone’s iPhone. Really, the whole thing is kind of heartbreaking. 

In his teaser, Hyukjin was V22 , and sang a quasi-heavy metal song -- think Dreamcatcher style -- called Lazenca, Save Us. It was a unique choice, that’s for sure! I think he was hoping that it might make a splash for being the guy who did THIS song. I’m not sure how I feel about his performance. I think I need to hear more of him to make up my mind. But I mean, gotta respect someone who comes out of the gate with that! I think his natural voice is not quite as deep and rich as it should be to successfully pull off this kind of thing, but he displays strong sense of pitch and a lot of power. It does gets a bit shrieky and it sounds like he’s hurting his throat. I’m looking forward to seeing what else he can do because I just want to see him succeed.

Ok, that's about it for this post! Sorry if it was a bit of a bummer. So many sad stories in this industry. In the next post, we'll be visiting with Team Unique, and then we'll finally get into the recaps! See you soon.

xoxo

BPR Noona

[eponastory]

Okay, I have to talk about this...

I get it, I really do, but people need to learn how to separate the Art from the Artist.

This is not in defense of anything that Reuben Langdon *may* have said. All I know is that he's really into aliens, and that's about it. I have no idea if any of the other stuff is actually true, and I really don't care because I can't be bothered about it anyway. Call me ignorant if you want, I don't judge people. At the end of the day, people are going to believe whatever the hell they want, and we can't change that.

It's out of my hands.

Anyway, Reuben has been Dante since DMC 3. I'm used to the voice. In this instance, I don't think his voice will fit the anime simply because we are getting a younger Dante. If we were getting a 40-something year old Dante, yeah, I'd consider Reuben reprising the role. But he doesn't have to, and it's really not up to us anyway.

I'm an artist as well, I don't expect people to like me as a person or what I believe. I'm a damn witch living in the Bible Belt of the US. I'm very critical of people who throw Bible verses at me calling me a Satanist when I don't even believe in Satan! The world is mad. But people do like my art (I work with crystals and resin) no matter the religion.

So, separate the art from the Artist.

Because Van Gough was actually crazy, but we love his art.

[namorslutfanfiction]

hi, idk why but i have the notion of you living in california and i was wondering, would you recommend it?? i know it's expensive but average how much would you spend on a month?? i'd love to know what you think about it. (and if you don't live there i'm sorry lol). hope you're doing well!

Hello, thank you for the ask. I'm finally back on here today to reply to my inbox so you asked at a good time.

I do live in California. Northern. About an hour north east of San Francisco. My town is actually in the top ten most expensive in the country when you compare income verses cost of living. For some perspective, I was looking at a single room apartment or even a studio and unless its government housing for low income, rent starts at 1600 and can go up as high as 2200, if you don't want to live in a bad neighborhood.

As of now I am still unemployed after losing my job earlier this month. I was making decent money there at $22 an hour. As I look for jobs I'm lucky to find anything close to that, that isn't completely out of my wheelhouse of skills. I was also living almost paycheck to paycheck at $22 an hour because I have quite a bit of debt and a car payment/insurance.

Most people out here have roommates or if they can afford their own place usually work as tradesmen or in the medical field. I was working in the casino industry but had an hour commute. Traffic in Norcal is much better than Socal. But the interstate freeways definitely get kind of shitty during rush hour.

Pros of California

Decent weather most of the year. We pretty much always have some sun, barring this past crazy winter.

Very populous so lot's of fun places to go within an hour or two drive no matter where you live. I'm literally an hour from San Francisco, 45 mins to the state capital, 20 minutes to Napa/Sonoma, and there are several universities in the area which increases need for cool activities and outings.

Very diverse and liberal in metropolitan areas. Most people are actually really nice and chill.

Lot's of tech opportunities and start ups

Honestly a lot of industries have a big presence here so if you can put in the work you can find a decent job especially if you live in a big city.

Lot's of cool nature and hiking paths. It's a big state and we love to maintain some of the natural beauty. Beaches, mountain, forest, lakes and deserts. Bunch of national and state parks

No snow unless you're literally on a mountain

Lots of great authentic and diverse food.

Good place for furthering education. We have high level schools that are internationally renown.

We have a ton of farms and during peak seasons its super easy to get fresh produce for cheap from farmers markets, stalls, and fairs.

We have 9 international airports and have access to a lot of imported goods.

Most artists will have multiple CA stops on their tours.

Cons of California

Super high cost of living. Yes our average wages are higher than most states but it doesn't really cover how high cost of living is especially in metropolitan areas.

Rent and housing prices are super high throughout the state unless you live in a super rural area. Also very competitive.

Public transportation is not great even in the cities.

Traffic, especially in LA can add hours to a drive.

You have to have a car if you're not living in the middle of a big city. Most places in CA are pretty spread out and hard to navigate on foot.

WILD FIRE SEASON

39 Million people live in California the last I checked. Socal is more populous than Norcal.

You have to reserve camping spots like a year in advance at the best parks.

Housing shortage has led to a homelessness epidemic. See Skid Row in LA. And those apartments are also super expensive even surrounded by vagrants.

Sometimes the fog is so bad you can't see a few yards in front of you. Mostly during the morning. I used to drive home at 3 am after work and i was going 40 on the highway because it was so foggy.

That's all I can think of at the moment. But if you have any other questions feel free to message me or send another ask.

[yellowcharm]

Just wanted to write and say how cool Hellbent is it’s so fucking good, I love the way you write everyone especially Sakura and Kakashi. Sakura being a seal master was such a fun direction for her character and made her a lot more interesting imo (and the cute friendship between Sasuke and her is lovely to read instead of just character bashing like other fics tend to lean into).

Kakashi tho omg. He’s my personally my favourite character in the series and his characterisation just makes me go feral ‼️ like the whole thing with Wolf and Hound is just unreal especially because in other things I’ve read his skill gets played down when Team 7 starts to develop so to see him still playing a part in the story makes me so happy.

Also I’m glad Fuu is finally getting the chance to go a little crazy and get revenge, she deserves it after the build up of previous chapters lmao - also in general i didn’t know alot about the personalities of the Jinchurikis and this fic has made me care a lot more about them and invested me into them so thanks for the new brain rot 😭

I’ve not found other fics like this that take the story in this direction so I’m fully here for the ride and am excited to see where this goes, thanks for sharing your work :)

Oh my gosh this made my entire week.

I'm so glad you've been enjoying the fic Nonnie!! I spent so long working to nail down Kakashi and Sakura's characterizations specifically, even before I started writing, so I'm really glad other people notice and like the direction I've taken them.

The Jinchuriki are hands down my favorite part of Naruto and I always devoured any and all content available about them. So little is actually known about most of them though!!! Definitely taking a LOT of liberties with their characters.

Thank you for reading and for taking the time to send this. People like you are like 40% of the reason I love writing as much as I do. (The other 60% is a poignant joy in getting to retell a story that I grew up loving and wishing were better in equal turn. The hellbent verse is like... a self propelled wish fulfillment LOL)

Hopefully I'll have a new chapter for you this week!!! :)) Big hugs!!!

~Lucky 🍀🌻

[mermaidfantasy05]

Teen Heroes Masterlist

Started: 12/28/22

Updated: 1/23/23

Status: Ongoing

Ao3

Description: Teen Heroes is a series that combines four series on my Ao3 account that I was writing for the other Fandoms I'm in combined with the MCU and DCU (Well, they're still trying to get their legs under them so I guess it'll mostly be the DCAU, the video games and the characters from the old DCEU before James Gunn stepped on board as well as the characters that are still left in the DCEU after James Gunn took over).

The series From My Ao3 Account Involved In This Series:

Ninjago (Which Will Hopefully Be An Anime One Day)

World Of Light

The Little Club Adventures

No Matter What Your DNA Is, You're A Hero

I am basically rewriting all these series through this one. Because the original ones are...... meh.

Warnings: This series is going to get Riverdale and The Amazing World of Gumball levels of crazy. There will be many hijinks, wacky adventures, chaos, (hopefully a lot of laughs) and dimensional travel. So if crazy, off the rails (and sometimes emotional) adventures with bleeding heart (I mean this in a positive way), super-powered teenagers are your thing, you've come to the right place. There will also more than likely be crackfics. Lots of them. Memes too. Whole stories dedicated to them.

Notes:

The Timeline is also more than likely fucked. I make references to media that shouldn't even exist yet by the MCU's timeline and some characters are younger than they should be (Like Jason) while still having their backstories (Like Jason). All in all, the timeline is fucked, nothing matters, characters (like Carol and The Guardians) show up way before they're supposed to but we're gonna ignore it all in the spirit of fun.

P.S. when I say nothing matters, I mean canon. Canon doesn't exist in this series, we're all just along for the ride. Welcome to fanfiction, baby! Hope you all enjoy this goofy, sometimes serious, sometimes emotional, sometimes utterly ridiculous series!

P.P.S This series is also gonna be full of original characters. Lots of them. And running gags, brick jokes, theater references, musical references, movie references, and tons of other references! Fanfiction, woooooo!!!!!

P.P.P.S Civil War did not happen. Everyone's braincells turned back online and they talked things out like ADULTS!!! Also, NO ONE IS DYING!! Tony's not dying, Vision's not dying, Pietro didn't die (and will continue not to), Natasha won't die, Gamora won't die, Loki also will not die (to everyone's eternal suffering), Coulson also didn't die, Steve's not gonna go gallivant around in the 40's and Aunt May WILL NOT DIE AND I WILL FIGHT ANYONE THAT SUGGESTS IT!!!! That is all.

P.P.P.P.S Also the Sony-verse is part of this. Which means Eddie the living human disaster fire will show up and become "The Hobo Uncle". Venom will be "Fun Uncle".

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Main Stories

The Girl & The Spider

What was supposed to be a normal Sunday morning (Spider-Manning notwithstanding) quickly turns into the beginning of a cliche love story when Peter Parker meets a girl in Mr. Delmar's Bodega (the girl breaking into the place later on notwithstanding). The romance cliches amp up (to the Avengers, May, MJ and Ned's teasing and amusement) when Peter discovers that the girl is actually a transfer student as part of a program Midtown's doing for the next six months. As Peter learns more about the girl and falls even more in love with her (to his annoying family's joy), he begins to sense that she has a secret she's not telling him......

Oneshots, Crackfics, Stories Inspired By Memes or Video Skits I've seen On YouTube Or Inspired By Cartoons I've watched

Multiverse Shenanigans & Adventures

AUs

Movie Adventures

Video Game Adventures

Book Adventures

Adventures In The Simulation Room

Chatfics, Texts, Incorrect Quotes & General Mayhem

[pipertransjourney]

MTF Journal Entry - Day 1

Sooo here I am, day 1! I'm calling this "Acceptance Day", because after 40 years of being afraid of the consequences for outwardly being who I truly feel like and identify as, verses the 6' tall alien walking around with me in it, I feel it's finally time to embrace my true self how ever it manifests, and celebrate what ever that comes to be. Like an urge to pee after holding on for too long, I can't hold it in anymore, the imposter syndrome is more real today than it ever has been. After decades of being who I was expected to be, I think I've earned the right to be as I truly am (if it even has to be earned). Feminine spiritually, emotionally, and mindfully, submissive by choice, and authentically loving my life! As for pronouns, I'm still coming to terms with the "politics" of it all. That said I understand it's validating to be recognised as who you are and understand yourself to be. For now though, meh, people can call me whatever they like, this is a journey of self truth, that is not something that can be reconciled with a pronoun.

So why now after living a perfectly acceptable life as a man for well over 40 years?.. Some might say I've missed the boat (yep someone actually said that). Mostly I've done the things that were expected of me in life, I've pleased the pleasable, and left the unpleasable to go their own ways. Also, I've come to realise that what other people think of me is none of my business, but what I think of myself; well that dictates my experience of life in general, the way I percieve my reality from both a micro and macro perspective, and my ability to love not just myself, but also those around me. That actually matters!.. So here goes, after snarffing down those Blue pills each day since my inception into this crazy ass world... I'll take the Red pill thanks!

And there it is, my first post, and my first step to being accountable to myself (perhaps the most important reason for this blog).

Piper

[kitsu-katsu]

About revived (by Derivakat)

(Disclaimer: Nothing against Derivakat, I think her songs are amazing in general and she's very talented, I simply have a bone to pick with these lyrics and characterization)

So um, here's my counter to some of the lyrics because fuck it, I'm tired and fueled by spite, let's go:

Let's start with the chorus:

"White streak in my hair but no stress now" - Funnily incorrect, cc!Wilbur confirmed that the white hair is from stress itself, it's not about the revival process alone. Also just by reasoning, I cannot imagine what might have been stressful about spiralling and believing that the world is out to crush you, believing that you're the scum of the Earth as well, only to die, spend 13 and half years in dark isolation and then being jolted back up to life missing huge chunks of information, really cannot fathom how that might be stressful /s

"I've seen hell, but this is a bit more my style" - True you know? It's awesome that he's said that he's over the moon about being alive again after spending 13 and a half years of pure isolation in the dark, screming until his throat was hoarse. But coming from the tone of it, I'd like to point out that Wilbur's also still passively suicidal and self harms (check out the part under "He doesn't love TNT, he self-harms with it" in this post)

"A decade of time to make everything mine" (also counts for "This is my sunrise, this is my dawn, this is what I've waited for all along. All of this time, all this is mine. MINE. MINE. MINE!")- Honestly, based on what he's been doing, no prejudices, forget everything fandom's said: he doesn't really seem to want to "make everything his", does he? This perception mostly comes from him saying "This is my sunrise, this is mine!" in the original revival stream, however, if you forget about common fandom perception, what's so evilly framed about a guy who spent 13 and a half years of isolation in the dark saying "this is my sunrise!" after watching the sun coming up again for the first time since his death, in which he was extremely emotionally unstable? Like for real?

Now onto the verses:

"Am I the bad guy? I'll be the bad guy again" and "I've come back hell-bent" - Now, he has said that: “Here’s the thing, Tommy. I, I, I, I know I was bad, and I know I can redeem myself, but like, you know, there’s a little bit of fun in being bad, you know, we’ve spoken about this.” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 11:31, 5th May), BUT, since then he's also expressed genuine remorse for his worse actions during Pogtopia (check out the parts under "He really regrets what happened in Pogtopia" and "Wilbur cares. A LOT" in this post), a wanting to redeem himself and truly become better and... uh... OH! He's also admitted that he's afraid he scares people and cried when Ranboo said that he was "an alright person". For real, just watch the Healthy Competition stream and read this reddit post by cc!Wilbur

The reddit post in question, just in case:

"You think I cared? It was always a means to an end" - So false. Just... so false. Ok, so quick one, let's review the actual lines said originally about him "not caring for L'manburg" in full:

“Uh, one thing, I didn’t actually really care about L'Manberg, I just cared about, you know, sticking it to the man. Actually, I cared about L'Manberg for the sole reason that I could use it to stick it to the man.” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 24:18, 5th May)

“Look, I- Okay, I said it wrong. Look, I did care about- I did care about L'Manberg, but I cared about it for- You would call it the wrong reasons, but I, I- Just don’t think about it, don’t think about it too hard. Look, L'Manberg’s gone now, we’ve got that, you know- That, that wart on my side is gone, you know. I salute it, I salute it, you know, it was a great- It was a great place.” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 25:18, 5th May)

“Look, Tommy, I’m gonna reiterate for you once more because I don’t think you quite understood, and that’s okay, you know, you don’t need to understand everything. I did care about L'Manberg. I did, I did. A rose by any other name would still smell as sweet, Tommy. L'Manberg would have been as loved by me had it been called Bimbum and was built in the middle of the desert.” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 26:05, 5th May)

“The actual location, and the actual things it was, it were, were not important to me. It’s the thing it stood for. Which was freedom, liberty, and sticking it to the man, Tommy!” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 26:26, 5th May)

“We were a family, Tommy. We were…” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 27:26, 5th May)

So as you may see, he retracts himself immediately and explains his feelings with more nuance

Then, let's look at the more recent confession to Ranboo:

“I told Tommy that I didn’t actually care about L'Manberg, and that it was just like a tool for me to use to gain like, you know, power and stuff. But it’s not, it’s not true.” - (Wilbur’s A Year Later: 26:36, 3rd Aug)

“L'Manberg is- was really important to me. And it is still to this day.” - (Wilbur’s A Year Later: 26:47, 3rd Aug)

“I want it to, em, I want its history to live on not as a stain caused by me, you know. I basically just took a big shit on the history books, it feels like. I wanna, I wanna make it, I wanna make it feel like it was, you know, it was something that happened. You know, it was a great thing, you know, think of the good times. The- The years of safety. Well, not years, but you know.” - (Wilbur’s A Year Later: 26:47, 3rd Aug)

If this got more explicit I'd be literally hitting you over the head with it. Anyway, check out the parts under "Wilbur cared. A LOT" and "He really cared and cares about L'Manburg, and didn't want its ideals twisted to hur others with" in this post

"So who cares? So what? I'm not calming down" and "Shut up! And listen" - “Tommy, shut up! I mean, Tommy, come over here. Tommy, come over here, come over here, man. It’s cool, it’s cool, it’s cool. Sorry, I, I-” (Alivebur)

– (Wilbur’s A Deck of Cards with a Green Smile on them: 26:08, 31st May)

That line's totality gets often cut down, erasing the immediate apology after the loss of cool. Furthermore, I'd argue that him "not calming down" in general is mainly due to his euphoria and overexcitement during certain scenes where it makes complete sense for him to be feeling like that, and in a broader sense, he has a tendency to say things in the heat of the moment and out of impulsivity that he turns to later regret from all the way back at Pogtopia. Him not calming down now is either out of impulsivity or outright euphoria to be out of limbo, not necessarily an evil thing. And when he percieves he should calm down, he tries his best to do it, or apologizes for snapping

“I’m sorry I wasn’t, you know, entirely on the same page. But, man, I promise you, I’ve calmed down, you know, I’m all, I’m all settled in. I understand, you know, what’s changed, what hasn’t, who’s new, who’s old, you know, who’s still about, you know, who… Who, uh… uh… Who trusts me and stuff.” - (Wilbur’s A Year Later: 15:04, 3rd Aug)

“I relived that explosion in my head so many times man. And, and, and I- I get that you don’t, you don’t trust me, I do, but like, man, look at me, bro, I’m not gonna do it again. I’m not gonna- I’m not gonna hurt you again.” - (Wilbur’s A Year Later: 21:21, 3rd Aug)

(Check out the parts under "Wilbur cares. A LOT", "Paranoia and distrustfulness are integral parts of his character", "Self-loathing and self-sabotage are also integral parts of his character", "He hesitated regarding the button tons of times" and "He feels inhuman. He knows that people see him as a freak, evil or crazy and that makes him feel dehumanized" in this post)

"There's nothing wrong with me" - BUDDY. Wilbur drowns in self-hatred, what are you talking about? The man got caught off guard and cried when someone said "you're an alright person"... He's worried that he scares people, he knows how others see him on top of his own self-hatred

“TommyInnit, as you know, is just, he thinks I’m insane. I’m not insane, chat, I’m not insane.” - (Wilbur’s The Festival: 4:30, 16th Oct)

“See, I’m not so crazy, Tommy. I know what I’m doing.” - (Wilbur’s The Festival: 16:40, 16th Oct)

“I’ve told you, I’m not crazy, Tommy. I know what I’m doing, and this is genuinely the best thing we could do right now.” - (Wilbur’s The Festival: 17:18, 16th Oct)

“I’m not crazy! How am I crazy?!” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 43:18, 17th Oct)

“Everyone I seem to meet has this deep intrisnic feeling of disgust towards me. Jack Manifold seemed to be quite nice to me, but I reckon he, I could feel it, you know, in his stare. But like, you don’t have that. I can tell you’re a good guy.” - (Wilbur’s resurrected gentleman of L'manburg: 30:24, 5th May)

“Quackity, I’ve, I’ve, I’ve, I’ll be honest you with you, I’ve lost everything, man. I, um. I’ve lost decades of my life. I’ve lost my- most of the people who cared about me. Some people don’t even know I’m back yet, and I, and I think that’s probably for the best. So I feel like that does humble a man. That really humbles a man, you know?” – (Wilbur’s A Deck of Cards with a Green Smile on them: 1:00:52, 31st May)

“Listen, Phil, I met, I met Quackity. After you very kindly lent me your house. I went and met him. Yeah! I met up with him, and I hadn’t seen him in ages. It was, I’m gonna say it, it was nice. It was a nice time. I- I- It felt good, it felt, uh, you know, he didn’t, he didn’t seem afraid of me, which is cool.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 7:38, 25th July)

“Not many people do. I mean, Phil, you don’t seem afraid of me, you’re not afraid of me, are you, Phil?” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 8:03, 25th July)

“Good, good. 'Cause I’m not afraid of you.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 8:10, 25th July)

“Why? Why? … No, no, no, no, no, not the, not the bit about the, not the bit about the right foot, the why don’t you think I’m a bad person?” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 35:13, 25th July)

“Can I be real with you, man? I think I scare people.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 36:30, 25th July)

“I mean, like I, I, I, I don’t think I, I- I think a lot of people share your idea, but they share your idea in trying to- trying to keep me from hurting them, you know? Like they’ve seen what I can do, and they don’t want me to do it again, so they adopt your emotion in order to do it.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 36:46, 25th July)

“Dream is- He’s had his comeuppance, and I have not! My comeuppance was apparently not good enough for this people. They’re just waiting, they’re waiting for the next thing for me to slip up on, and, Ranboo, I’m not gonna fucking slip up, Ranboo. I’m different.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 38:07, 25th July)

“I’m living in eternal limbo, again. I’ve been through limbo, I’m out of limbo, and socially, I’m still in this limbo.” - (Wilbur’s Healthy Competition: 38:36, 25th July)

(Check out the parts under "He feels inhuman. He knows that people see him as a freak, evil or crazy and that makes him feel dehumanized", "Paranoia and distrustfulness are integral parts of his character" and "Self-loathing and self-sabotage are also integral parts of his character" in this post)

"Oh yes, I blew up the nation!" (said with glee) - I make a point of the tone in this specific line, because I could make a point of the tone in the whole song, but this line is a good example. He didn't blow up L'manburg just with glee like "hell yeah! I did it!". Of course he talks about it with pride sometimes, but it's usually either said in the middle of the same impulsive moments in which he'd claim he doesn't care, said with relief of him having control over at least that situation (like him sighing right after doing it just to ask Phil to finish it off by killing him), or said with the same deflection with which he'd claim that not having a grave didn't affect him and was badass actually since he only wanted it for the hateful obituaries anyway (which was a lie, and he admitted it on the third of august stream when saying "I was so pressed about not having a grave" in case you had doubts)

Finally, I want to make emphasis on the fact that: The explosion on the 16th had two main drives behind it and they often get glossed over. The first objectivee was blowing it up and causing just enough destruction to get L'manburg back (You know, when Wilbur still had some kind of hope). After his spiral went further and his paranoia and self-loathing worsened, his two drives become apparent: First was blowing it up to rid the world of the twisted thing L'manburg became, ridding the world of what the twisted version of his ideals became with Schlatt in control of them. Secondly, he wanted to end L'manburg as a part of himself and rid the world of himself completely (by this I'm referencing his suicide), he decided he wanted to die and expected that as a result since a lot of time before the 16th. The explosion was effectively a bigger projection of his suicide, rid the world of both himself and his creation, mixed with his constant desire to protect, it also becomes "rid the world of the corrupted version of L'manburg that became Manburg", because for all intents and purposes, since the important thing about L'manburg was its founding ideals, L'manburg had been dead for a long time at that point.

“Yesterday I had the perfect opportunity to blow everything up and finally end it, you know. I had the perfect opportunity to finally blow up everything and end it and just completely save everyone, right, from the tyranny of Schlatt and the tyranny of the existence of Manberg and L’Manberg, right.” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 25:17, 17th Oct)

“Explain it to me! Give me a reason! Give me a reason!” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 26:50, 17th Oct)

“Who else is it gonna hurt?! It’s gonna hurt Schlatt, Manberg, and-” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 26:55, 17th Oct)

“Why did I bring- I should have just done it. I’m such a fucking showman. I should have just done it.” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 27:18, 17th Oct)

“No you two can escape, I’ll be the… I’ll- I’ll- I’ll be… I’ll be trapped in here…” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 27:27, 17th Oct)

“I just- I just want to f… I just wanna end it, I wanna end it. I wanna press that button, man.” - (Wilbur’s Speedy Stream Festival What festival: 28:08, 17th Oct)

(Check out the parts under "Wilbur cares. A LOT", "Paranoia and distrustfulness are integral parts of his character", "Self-loathing and self-sabotage are also integral parts of his character", "He hesitated regarding the button tons of times", "He really cared and cares about L'Manburg, and didn't want its ideals twisted to hur others with", and "He really regrets what happened in Pogtopia" in this post)

[demcnsinmymind]

@shctsfired sent 🌀 for a random number - One Word Writing Prompts - Accepting!

28. — hope

Hope is such a fascinating thing. A true carrot on a stick. Balance it right and you can do anything to them. Get them to give you exactly what you want. Easily.

Give them a lot of it and they get bold. They get cocky. Lazy, almost. Which, sooner or later, always brings about their downfall. Brought on all by themselves. Give them no hope and they fall into utter despair. Soul crushingly so. Until it also reaches a plateau of nothingness in them. Which in return...just makes them give right up. But hit the sweet spot of just a little bit of hope and oh boy. The amount of suffering they can take is truly astonishing.

Astonishing.

This is the right word to describe this one. And his relationship with hope.

It's been years now. Trapped in here with it and all the others, though it knows that he's not even aware of just how long it's been for him. Trapped in a truly hopeless situation. With no way out, constantly on the brink of losing both his mind and life. Yet for some reason, there it still is. Right inside of him. Hope. Indestructible. A true constant.

It must've seen hundreds of others all around him. Succumbing to these hopeless circumstances. Either to their own hands or to those belonging to others, both human and not. Seeing all of it for what it is. Hopeless. Something to just...give up over.

Not this one though.

This one's not just hoping to get out. This one's convinced that he'll get out. As if it's a fact when it's anything but.

After all. He should be dead. Shouldn't even be here. Yet he is.

An anomaly. A like minded, strange soul.

Talking to himself about his escape plans when no one's around. Whispering to himself. Using the pen even it doesn't know when and where he stole it to write on yellow walls, the surface of its skin,....if it had any. Tickles almost. Makes it so much funnier. So much more intriguing.

Hope can be a beautiful thing. And it's something that, for the first time ever, it's willing to give.

I will save you. Don't be scared.

It decides to write right back. Just a little bit. That sweet spot of hope. and oh boy. The amount of suffering he can take is something to hold on to.

[onsunnyside]

i’m very curious, do you have a fav arcadia phi trope?

been up obsessed w steve and legacy since i first read it- he’s the perfect amount of mean yet somewhat soft/sweet (idk call me crazy hehe)

tho after reading about all of the other tropes i’m torn between them ALL. i already know i’m gonna eat up some boxer!ari and some lawyer daddy andy, i also love me an innocent reader. UGH i’m so excited to read what you have planned i think i’ve read captains legacy chapters 40 times i don’t think i’ll ever get tired of it

p.s ignore pushy anons about new chapters 💗 they seem to forget you too have a personal life (you also post blurbs/drabbles daily too so i don’t understand the inpatientness)

oo good question🧐 i think i'll have to go with steve !! there's just something about him being so set on one person like he wants it all and the future with you, and he isn't going to let you or anyone else ruin that. plus, he paved the way for the whole verse, he deserves a gold star for that.

ahh i'm also with you about being torn !! they've all got their own things, and I don't like picking favourites, but I have been obsessed with curtis lately 😳

thank you very much, friend 💙 you're very sweet, pls take this kith 😚

[powerful-niya]

Hey Niya!

While I'm writing my answers to the questions you sent me, there's yours 😊

1. things that inspire you

6. how did writing change you?

9. do you set yourself deadlines?

15. hardest verse to write

27. best review you ever got

31. easiest part of writing

38. do you reread your own stories?

40. which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series

41. one song that captures Enemies Or Lovers

Thank you! ❤

Thanks so much @chloelapomme for the questions! You really picked some deep ones too! I really have to think, haha. So starting with the first question:

1. Things that inspire you.

There are a lot of things in this world that inspire me to work hard and be my very best. But I’ll name three things to keep this answer short.

My first inspiration is my family. My entire family is hardworking and deserving. They push forward no matter how hard circumstances are. My family is intelligent, they strive to be the best of the best and as a result, I try to. The people that raised me are my role models. They’ve done so much for me so, I want to make them proud. My family inspires me to be the best of the best and never give up when things get hard. They’ve taught me that life can be tough but you just have to be tougher. Now, I want to make my loved ones proud.

My second inspiration is my friends. The friends I have in IRL and my online friends. My friends always tend to pick me up when I fall and convince me to keep going. I can always rely on them both my online friends and my friends IRL.

My third inspiration is the dreams that I have. I have many dreams, goals that I want to reach. I have things I want to obtain. So because I want a certain thing, I tend to go the extra mile to get to it. My dreams can also be my inspiration. They inspire me to keep going to achieve what I want.

6. How did writing change you?

Well, writing I believe has changed me lots. Before writing, I could not find a hobby that best suited me but that now that I have, I am truly happy. Writing makes me happy. I absolutely love writing about crazy situations that involve Naruto and Hinata. And I also love writing about romance and love. It makes my life complete. Writing itself has not only made me happy but the fact that I shared my writing online, has changed my life spectacularly. I have met some of the most amazing people. People that I can truly relate to. Because of that, I appreciate my decision in embracing my writing and bravely putting it out there for all to see. Now, I cannot remember my life without writing being in it. I feel like when I found out that writing was something I absolutely love to do, I believe that was the turning point in my life.

9. Do you set yourself deadlines?

Oh hell yeah, I do. I literally have so much planned for my writing and my Naruhina books and I would not get those tasks done if I do not set deadlines. I tend to put myself on a schedule. But I get mad, every, single, time when I do not stay… on schedule. It’s pretty serious over here, haha.

15. Hardest verse to write?

Hmm, this is an interesting question because I’ve written many lines that were just hard to write. Like Naruto’s past in A Crazy Accident. Those scenes were so hard to write due to being highly disturbing. But to really explain Naruto’s crazy behavior, I had to give his past the same energy. So, writing that was hard, and sad. I truly do not want to spoil any of my books so I will just say this.

Writing the last words to a character that is just moments away from dying is SUPER hard. I do not care who it is. A henchmen, some random person, a side character, a character that meant a lot to the story, whatever! Anyone who I’ve written that dies in my story, I have potentially shed many tears before writing. It’s just so sad, ya know. Death is a serious thing and writing about it, knowing that this is the last time I would have to write this character talking or living, just calls upon the waterworks. So, any verse that is the last words of a character before they die, is another thing that is hard to write. It’s so difficult.

27. Best review you ever gotten?

Wow! There are many readers that have sent me TONS of beautiful reviews and comments on my stories. I appreciate every comment my readers give me. All of them touch my heart just the same. But I will drop a few.

A Crazy Accident/ The End:

Demonofthefridge18: Thank you for this story you have written. I absolutely love it. It was so wild from the start and it always had me reading more. I loved the story and I don't know why but I loved how much of an ass Naruto was haha. Me and my addiction to toxic men. I can’t wait to read your next story and I hope for the best for your future.

GabySantha: Looking forward to bound! Can’t wait! This was actually a really nice read!!! I enjoyed every chapter! Congratulations! You have talent in writing! Keep up with the good work! I’m glad that I discovered you.

Bound/ Epilogue: Away With The Storm:

Nakeira13: Oh this was beautiful. I have been reading this story from the very first chapter and I have to say this has been a roller coaster of emotions. The author deserves a big round of applause due to her patience and dedication to this story. Author-chan thanks so much and keep up with the amazing work!

aviesee: As someone who has been following this story since A Crazy Accident and now finishing with Bound, I just want to thank you for this story. I really enjoyed reading it. I just love happy endings, especially after going through so many hardships! More power to your writing.

Enemies Or Lovers/ Epilogue: A New Life:

Queenchass123: Perfect, I loved how you described everything so thoroughly. You never cease to amaze me, keep on blowing my mind & writing great stories.

ChloeLaPomme: It’s definitely my favorite story!! You already knew it but I wanted to say it again, haha. I’m so glad everybody’s fine and happy especially Hinata and Naruto who are spoiling their children so much. Once again, thank you for this awesome, fantasy story.

Is_not_avalible: I love your story’s. This one is definitely my favorite.

The Unknown/ Chapter 9: Extreme Measures:

Aime0704: I’m getting addicted to your story. Reading the ones you wrote feels like my soul is in another universe. My kami. You’re so talented. Every sentence you wrote is so magical. Fufu please do write more.

Overall comment of the entire story: The Unknown:

PeachyUzumaki: Just got done reading your book, “The Unknown.” and I wanted to give my thoughts if that’s okay. (First) I wanna say that I love the details of the book. It definitely gave me the chills lol. (Second) I love how you portrayed Hinata’s friends and Kurama. I’m happy that Hinata had people to defend her. (Skip a few parts due to spoilers) But for real thought, good book, I love your writing, you definitely should give yourself more credit because you do an amazing job with your books.

Naruhina Oneshots/ Chapter 19: ACA/ Bound- Birthday Edition:

Abby_heart1114: Love this!!! So cuteeee, aww, it’s so sweet seeing Naruto get so emotional and relaxing that he finally has a loving family! Hinata is literally the best. She’s his angel.

MangoMann1: You’re so good at writing! Keep up the amazing work!

There are many, many more comments out there that has really touched my heart and made my day. But, I will be going on forever. Thanks so much for the feedback, readers. I couldn't help myself from shouting out a few of my readers comments. They're awesome and I deeply appreciate every single one of them.

31. Easiest part of writing?

Hmm, I believe because I tend to be very creative when it comes to writing; I believe the easiest part for me is coming up with ideas. My mind is filled with lots of things so when I start planning, it doesn’t take me long at all to figure something out to write and I go for it.

38. Do you reread your own stories?

Yes, yes, yes! I am very proud of my stories and the result of them. I absolutely love them and how dark they are. I have written them just the way I have always yearned for in fanfictions. So, reading them never gets old.

40. Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series?

Wow! I love this question. But I would sayyy… maybe A Crazy Accident but a little dryer when it comes to the lemons and also a little less dark. I see A Crazy Accident, as well as Bound, being a tv series, I guess. I also see Enemies Or Lovers as a movie too. That story would look beautiful on the big screen.

41. One song that captures Enemies Or Lovers?

“Rewrite the Stars” By Zac Efron & Zendaya. I think this song represents the forbidden love Naruto and Hinata have in Enemies Or Lovers. Like literally, the lyrics fit so well!

Once again, thank you @chloelapomme for the questions! I will be happy to answer more! 😁

[cc-pdf]

What’s It Like In New York City?

Katsuki Bakugou x reader

Quirkless rock band au

Based off of the song, Hey There Delilah

Word count: 2913

Warnings: Slight alcohol use. Nothing to be worried about though.

  After a long day at university you decided you deserved a night out on the town. Although you had piles of homework to do, you decided to put that all aside and just relax and have a few drinks. You grabbed your big winter coat and stepped out of campus into the swirling cold winter outside. L Street Tavern was one of the closest bars to your campus, so you decided to settle down there. Plus, they always have live music there, even better.

  After a short walk through the blistering cold air you had finally arrived at the historic bar. You noticed a flyer on the window it read,

  "Sex Bob Omb playing tonight."

  You had never heard of them before. It was probably just some local band. You stepped through the bars creaking door and took a seat on one of the oak stools. There were only a few other people at the bar. Most of them were probably in their mid 40s or 50s. You had given them a slight wave when you sat down just to be friendly. They had waved back, but then quickly returned back to their conversations. You weren't really looking for people to talk to, you just wanted to relax after the stressful day.

  After a couple of drinks you heard the tuning of a guitar in the corner. You looked over to see a couple people in the corner. They were dressed like classic teenage band members. Black jeans, skate shoes, a random t-shirt they found in the back of their closet. You examined each member. A spiky blond seemed to be the lead. He was tuning his guitar and had a microphone stood in front of him. Behind him was a short black haired girl behind a microphone. She seemed to be the backup singer. The last person was a crazy red haired boy at the drums. It seemed like your typical band that probably practices in the garage. You loved those types of bands. Something about them just seemed so raw and authentic.

  A few moments later you jumped to the sound of the red hair banging his drum sticks together.

  "ONE TWO THREE GO!" He yelled signaling the band to start.

  You never really thought a band like this would be playing at a historic bar in the middle of a harsh Boston winter. But, bands really will play wherever they can nowadays. They have to try and get any recognition they can.

  "This is the beginning of the song." The blond muttered into the microphone with his raspy voice. "I'm hearing voices, animal voices. The creme da la creme. the feminine abyss. And I'm reaching my threshold. Staring at the truth till i'm blind." He began lazily singing with the sound of a rough, badly tuned guitar.

  The lyrics weren't too bad for just some random band. You actually thoroughly enjoyed the sound of such a band like this. You could see the the crazy red hair banging at the broken down set of drums releasing all of his anger. It made you giggle a bit.

  "My body's stupid, stereo putrid. Spilling out music into raw sewage." The girl jumped into sing. She surprisingly had a pretty good voice, although it didn't really suit the vibe of the band.

  "Reaching my threshold. Staring at the truth till I'm blind." They all sang together. They repeated the same verses a couple more times. When the song had ended you could tell they were all out of breath from the loud performance. They were panting like dogs on a hot summer day.

  "WE ARE SEX BOB OMB!!!" The girl yelled out to the bar while raising her hands in the air.

  "I hope you guys enjoyed, but we've lost all of our breath for tonight, peace." The blond said while walking into the back room. Most people started clapping and cheering, some people were booing them at the fact they only played one song, but you just returned to your bitter cold beer in front of you. The cold alcohol entering your stomach calmed you from your hard day.

  A few moments later the band members took a seat at the bar near you. It seemed they just wanted a few drinks after that harsh performance.

  "Miller Lite, please." The spiky blond said to the bar tender under his raspy tone.

  "Same here." The other two members said. The bar tender poured the three drinks and slid them across the bar to them.

  "You like the show?" The blond looked over and asked to you, as you sipped your cold drink.

  "Yeah, wasn't expecting such a lame band to go this hard." You said looking over to him.

  "Hey, we try our best to look professional here." He snapped back at you.

  "I'm just teasing." You said focusing back on your drink.

  "So, you from around here?" He said with his masculine tone.

  "I go to university near here, but I'm originally from New York City." You said fiddling with the rim of your drink.

  "The big apple, huh? Must've been rough living there." He responded.

  "Not really..." You said taking a sip of your beer.

  "We're from around here. Cambridge to be exact. We spend a lot of time over in Boston though. Trying to get a good gig." He explained while taking another sip of his Miller Lite.

  "I'm sure you'll get a gig. You're pretty good." You said trying to sound nice.

  "Thanks. Maybe you can come watch us here again sometime." He said passing you a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket with their schedule printed on it.

  "Thanks, but I'm leaving the city for a few weeks to visit family back in New York. Maybe I'll see you after. My names y/n, by the way." You said looking into his bright crimson eyes while grabbing the schedule. You could see the disappointment in his eyes.

  "Oh, well that's a downer. You must be pretty busy with school too..." He said trailing off.

  "Damnit Bakugou, stop flirting with the poor girl." The red hair chipped in. The girl laughed along.

  "Shut up you prick, at least she's not a whore. I'm not even flirting." He snapped at them while getting up to go to the bathroom.

  After he had came back things were pretty quiet after the remark the red hair had made.

  About a half hour later you decided you should start heading back to campus. It was 12:30 and you needed some rest.

  "Hey, I'll try and come see your band when I come back." You said waving to them as you walked out the door.

  "See ya!" The blond said with that tired voice of his.

  "Yeah, see ya." The other two trailed along.

  You knew you probably wouldn't see them again because you're always so hung up with school. It didn't really matter to you anyways, they were just some random band at the bar.

  Little did you know, the ash blond, Katsuki Bakugou, thought you were absolutely stunning. With that perfect h/l, h/c hair of yours, your big, e/c eyes, and your little smile, you were nothing but perfect to him. You were stuck in his mind for the next few weeks. You weren't some crazy little fake fan girl looking to fuck for once. You seemed genuine.

  You had pinned the schedule he gave you onto the cork board in your dorm. Although you didn't really care too much to go and see them again, maybe it would be nice to check and see if they're still playing at L Street Tavern when you get back.

  Only a couple days later you got on the bus to New York. It was a long ride, but it was worth it all in the end. You desperately wanted to see your family after 4 long months of living alone at school.

~

  A couple weeks after your encounter with Katsuki Bakugou you still hadn't left his mind. Your beautiful name was glued to his brain. He decided to tune up his guitar and start a song about you. He liked to get his thoughts out by writing songs. It calmed him. He started with a simple,

  "Hey there y/n, what's it like in New York City? I'm a thousand miles away, but, girl, tonight you look so pretty." He thought it sounded cheesy, but he continued writing it anyways. He enjoyed the sound of a rough acoustic guitar against a sweet love song. He had never written a song like this before, it was all so new to him. He usually wrote songs about his anger or hate for people, usually engaging in more of a hard rock, or head bangers.

  A couple days later he decided to find an open mic to play the song at. He was pretty proud of the new tune and couldn't help but share it. He found an open mic session at a small family owned restaurant right around the corner from L Street Tavern. He was worried you might show up and hear the song, but he remembered, you were staying in New York for a pretty long time.

  The night of the open mic had come. He stepped into the tiny restaurant and sat down at a table with his guitar. There was quite a few people at the restaurant that night. He hoped they would like his newly crafted love song.

  Eventually, he stepped into the space with the cheap microphone and pulled his guitar strap over his shoulder.

  "I wrote this song for a girl that's been stuck in my mind for the past few weeks. I hope you enjoy." He said into the microphone.

  Authors note - Hey, I would suggest maybe listening to Hey There Delilah by Plain White Ts during this part :) okay back to the story.

  He started gently strumming his guitar to a rhythm.

  "Hey there y/n what's it like in New York City? I'm a thousand miles away, but, girl, tonight you look so pretty. Yes you do. Times square can't shine as bright as you. I swear, it's true." He began the song with his lazy guitar playing. He continued the song. He could tell most of the people in the restaurant enjoyed the honesty behind the lyrics. It made him happy someone was enjoying his work.

  "Hey there, y/n. Don't you worry about the distance. I'm right there if you get lonely. Give this song another listen. Close your eyes. Listen to my voice, it's my disguise. I'm by your side." He sang under his gruff voice.

  "Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. What you do to me." He led on with the catchy bridge.

  "Hey there, y/n. I know times are gettin' hard. But just believe me, girl. Someday I'll pay the bills with this guitar. We'll have it good. We'll have the life we knew we would. My word is good." Bakugou carried on.

  "Hey there, y/n. I've got so much left to say. If every simple song I wrote to you. Would take your breath away. I'd write it all. Even more in love with me you'd fall. We'd have it all." He went on, after that singing the bridge again.

  "A thousand miles seems pretty far. But they've got planes and trains and cars. I'd walk to you if I had no other way. Our friends would all make fun of us. And we'll just laugh along because we'd know. That none of them have felt this way. Y/n, I can promise you. That by the time that we get through. The world will never ever be the same. And you're to blame." He sang emotionally while strumming along.

  "Hey there, y/n. You be good, and don't you miss me. Two more years and you'll be done with school. And I'll be makin' history like I do. You know it's all because of you. We can do whatever we want to. Hey there, y/n, here's to you. This one's for you." After this he slowly ended the lovely song with the bridge,

  "Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. Oh, it's what you do to me. What you do to me, oh oh, woah, woah. Oh woah, oh. Oh." He sang softly, ending the song by strumming all of the strings on his beat up guitar.

  After he had finished the sweet tune someone came up to him.

  "Hey kid, that song you played was actually pretty good. The lyrics and rhythm were amazingly catchy. No one can ever go wrong with a classic love song. Maybe I can help you get big. I know some people in the industry. I came here to find some new musicians, actually." The mysterious figure said to him.

  Bakugou was in shock. He knew people liked his music. But not to the point where somebody like this would notice him. Especially this song. It was just some overly cheesy love song.

  "Thanks." He said not knowing what to say. He was speechless.

  "Here, give me a call." He said while slipping his business card over to the blond.

  Of course later that night he couldn't help but call the guy. He had never heard anything like this from someone.

~

  Y/n was nearing the end of her trip. She was sitting in her Mother's car on the way to the bus station back to Boston. She couldn't help but over hear the radio.

  "Hey we have a new love song from this band called Sex Bob Omb. I thought it was pretty good, how about we give it a play." You couldn't believe what you just heard, so you immediately turned up the volume on the radio. You could hear that spiky blond's classic voice over the sound of a relaxed, acoustic guitar. It seemed very unlike the band to have a song like this, or even be on the radio.

  "Hey there y/n, what's it like in New York City? I'm a thousand miles away, but, girl, tonight you look so pretty. Yes you do." The song started out gently. You jumped at these lyrics. You thought you were dreaming. But you weren't...

  "Mom, I think this song is about me..." You said trying not to sound insane.

  "Sweetie, it's just some song on the radio I'm sure you're over thinking it." She said calmly.

  "No, Mom, I saw this band at the tavern a few weeks ago. The lead singer was talking to me at the bar." You denied her.

  "I'm sure it's just a coincidence." She said keeping her eye on the road.

  "Times Square can't shine as bright as you. I swear, it's true." You softened at these lyrics. The way he wrote them... It made you feel like you were the only girl in the world that mattered.

  "Hey there, y/n. Don't you worry about the distance. I'm right there if you get lonely. Give this song another listen. Close your eyes. Listen to my voice, it's my disguise. I'm by your side." You couldn't help but feel like he was actually by your side, like he stated. You wished he could sing this to you, with that guitar of his, while looking you in the eyes. You really were falling for some mysterious guy. You would have never thought you would fall for some rebellious band member... or someone that you barely even knew. Music had never moved you in a way like this, it was so connecting, yet unexpected.

  Finally, You had made it back to your campus. You rushed up to your dorm to see that schedule he gave you. You wanted to see him again. The lyrics of the song made you melt. It warmed your heart. Making you fall for the random blond even more. Thankfully, the band was booked pretty far ahead on the schedule.

  A few nights later you caught yourself back at L Street Tavern hoping to see them there. You were sure they wouldn't be there now that they had made it on the radio. But it didn't hurt to try and see if they would be there.

  Unexpectedly you heard the sweet voice of the girl scream,

  "WE ARE SEX BOB OMB!"

  You turned around and made eye contact with the blond. His face flourished red. You couldn't stop staring into his glistening crimson eyes.

  "Wait, it's y/n." He said walking over to you, stopping the other band members.

  "The girl you wrote the song about? I thought that was just a made up name." The red hair said furrowing his eyebrows.

  "You came..." He said looking into your love struck eyes.

I really wanted to make a story inspired by this song so I hope you liked it. :)

Please comment some more songs you would like me to write stories about.

Also yes I got the name Sex Bob Omb and the song they sang is from Scott Pilgrim vs. The World hehe. Also, L Street Tavern is a real bar in Boston!

[thegirlintheredchair]

٥ رمضان ١٤٤٢ (5th Ramadan 1442,2021)

اسلام علیکم (peace be upon you)

A very very late entry... 😅 I apologize but in my defense, I'm a little sleep deprived today.

Slept at one yesterday, woke up for sehri at 2 and then slept at 7 again 💀 and then woke up at 11... but it was worth it.✌🏻 The weather got crazy... like it was a proper thunderstorm at sunrise, and the sunrise was a sight!! I'm so sad and mad at myself for not taking a picture..☹ I did take a really bad video though. It will never see that light of day..🙃

Golden hour will forever be my favorite but blue hour has its own allure. I saw the sunrise after ages. It was majestic and it reminded me of those ayats (verses) in Surah Yaseen.

It's one of my favorites as it metaphorically explains the connection between our Beloved Prophet (SAW) and the ummati (meaning you the reader and me as well)

The ayats are 39 to 40 and they roughly say:

"We make the moon go through different phases." And then Allah adds: “its not appropriate for the sun to come ahead of the moon and the night cannot come before the day. Each one has their place and they move as such."

Which is to say that Allah is emphasizing that Everything has its own job. The parallel being made here is that before Allah starts talking about the Sun and the Moon, He is discussing the story of a nation that got send 3 messengers to it at the same time. But surprisingly, that story is not a narrative of what the messengers said, rather its an account of a believer who learns that 3 messengers are calling to The Oneness of Allah and he decides to go help them. 😇

As a general rule, when your in the presence of someone qualified (like the messengers here) you let them do the talking but he feels the need to speak so Allah tells us something here:

Messengers have their own responsibility. The ummah who believes in them has its own responsibility.

The messengers will do their job and the believer will do theirs. And they cannot replace each others jobs - and just like that what else has their own job, the sun and the moon.

Where does our dearest Messenger (SAW) fit in to all this? In another passage in the the Noble Quran (Surah Ahzab) Allah describes the Prophet (SAW) and talks to him telling him is roles. He describes Rasolalallah (SAW) with a unique word: "Siraj-um-munira" – a lamp that gives light and illuminates other things.

The word "Siraj" in the Noble Quran is also used for the sun, so our Beloved Messenger (SAW) is compared to the sun here.

Back to Surah Yaseen, it says that the sun has its own job and the moon its own, so what does it mean if our Honarable Messenger (SAW) is being compared to the sun?

When our Beloved Messenger (SAW) came, and the believers and followers were in his presence, there was no doubt whatsoever that they wouldn't be exposed to light. There was no possibility that darkness would prevail because "the sun" has arrived. 🌅

But Allah has decreed it so that the Sun does not stay in the sky forever, it sets, it goes away. So when the sun goes away, whose turn is it to provide light in the darkness of the night, the moons.

Our Beloved Rasollallah (SAW) is no longer with us. But who is still here? We are! His followers. His believers. His "Ummatais."

Likewise, the sun is in a position of command and the moon is its follower (also proven scientifically). The only reason the moon has any light is because it reflects the light of the sun.

We are currently living in dark times, and we are being compared to the moon. The only light we have is the light shining on us through the darkness that originates from the sun- Rasollallah (SAW).

Sunhanallah! 🤯 I was and still am mind blown by this. Allah is so Poetic!

But wait! There's more.

The iman (faith) of every believer is actually a reflection of the original teachings of our beloved prophet (SAW).

Another parallel is that the sun does not go through phases. The sun is perfect every time. But the moon, sometimes it’s a full moon and sometimes it’s a weak moon just like the believer. We don’t stay the same.

In another passage of the Honorable Quran, Allah describes the heart of my Messenger (SAW) as firm and permanent in his faith of Allah. its constant, very much like the sun. (the sun constantly burns to provide light). Regardless of whether you see the sun or don't, its still shining its light on the moon.

The believer faith though, just like the moon goes through phases. sometimes its a full moon but sometimes its so weak, you can barely find it in the sky. But even in its weakest state, it is still reflecting the light of Rosolalallah (SAW).

I've always loved the moon because the moon is a reminder of me, of you. Its a reminder that Allah chose this ummah in the darkest times to be a source that reflects the light of our Beloved Rasolallah (SAW) [if you were feeling low, this should make you feel special!🥰]

So what is our responsibility then?

this infamous quote by Hazrat Umar (RA) sums it up best:

"I am the messenger of the messenger of Allah."

this simple quote is so deep though, it tells us what being a member of this ummah means,- everyone is a representative of our Beloved Messenger (SAW), when we are following his teaches or ignoring them, our conduct, our behavior, whether we control our eyes, hands or tongue - whether we like it or not, we are "supposed" to be reflecting the light of Muhammad (SAAW). He made you Muslim for a reason, wake up and own it!

As Muslims, we're born with this responsibility, we obviously don't do it justice because we are never always a full moon. sometimes were weak and frail.

but do you know what makes this such a grandand dare I say cute concept? even when the moon is weak, it still remains, it doesn't disappear, and when its weakest, its time for it rise again - that is the way Allah has decreed it! 🥲

Our Messenger said that the faith of the believer will waver, it'll go up and down. We wont always feel the same reverence of faith all the time. BUT our connection to our messenger will strengthen this faith over and over and over again.

How beautiful is our relationship with our prophet? 😭😭😭

We are the chosen ummah, to carry the Messengers (SAW) metaphorical torch or in better words mission forward. Allah in his infinite wisdom knew that when the Prophet (SAW) would depart this world it would feel like the sun has disappeared and that we're in a constant state of "night" of fear, hopelessness, anxiety and ignorance.

I hope that I and we all become a source of light in this darkness, that when someone sees us, they are able to glimpse a little bit of our Habibullah through us. 🥺🥺🥺

The signs of Allah (the sun and moon and trees and mountains) all have lessons behind them. I hope that this little insight that I gained myself and tried to provide, changes your POV and that now every time you look at the sun, you are reminded of my Rasolalallah (SAW).

and I also hope you pay more attention to the Quran this month, read it with translation and visibly see your life and world transform. This is the beauty of Quran, once you manifest its view, you cannot escape its reminders and its constant connection to our Messenger (SAW).

May Allah make us of those that carry the light of the Prophet (SAW) and reflect it back and outwards so others can find their way to the sun. 🛣

Love, Phi.💖

P.S posting some pictures of the sunset because it was just as bomb 👌🏻