#I'm not a flat earther but I'm willing to play one for money

[teatimeweirdo]

+Genshin modern au headcanons+

note: ahhh my tumblr hasn't been working since yesterday, it wouldn't show my blog and the app would always crash when i tried to open my notifications TwT, I'm also trying around with new point of view so don't be to harsh

Characters: Scaramouche, Kaeya, Kazuha, Ayato, Albedo

Scaramouche

Flat Earther™/j

I can see him studying Biology at University

Ei and Yae raised him together, not well, but they raised him (he is a little brat)

in his off time he probably hangs out with Kazuha, because they have been besties since Kindergarten

listen what if he's a part-time, totally underpaid, McDonald's worker, who is absolutely done with everyone's bs (that's how he met you)

he totally didn't like you at first, but you were one of Kazuha's friends and Kazuha wouldn't stop bringing you around to meet with him, so the two of you were kind of forced to hang out eith each other

don't expect any nicknames from him, or random sweet texts or phone calls, I don't think scaramouche uses his phone a lot and he prefers physical affection in the comfort of you own home more then quick texts... although he will get a little sad when u don't text him all day

he probably would take you to the cinema for dates, he doesn't enjoy movies or people, but he enjoys the dark and quietness of the cinema (he sneaks in snacks)... he probably also likes the weird feeling of entering the cinema when it's light outside and leaving when it's dark outside

I also think he would quite enjoy just sitting in his room and playing video games, i doubt he has any that the two of you can play together, but he is willing to tale turns if you desperately want to play too, he enjoys cuddling while playing video games... not like he would admit it tho

Kaeya

Kaeya lives of his dad's money, not that he's mooching of of him but he has difficulties finding a job, so he's currently building a career as a model, it kind of works... he has a bit of a following on his social media channels, but no product placements yet

listen as much as i want to make Kaeya and Diluc hate each other.... i literally can't, they just bicker like normal siblings (noone is allowed to talk shit about Diluc or Kaeya will fight them, Kaeya on the other hand is allowed to trash talk Diluc)

let's be real here, he probably wasn't the smartest kid at school, he probably nearly failed Maths or something

listen he probably speaks French, just like his father and brother, they're a very fancy family™

he probably met you while taking a photo, he was blocking your way... you asked him to move and he just sparked up a conversation with you

he tries to be cool about his little crush, but behind closed doors he is just a love sick puppy.... he probably asked his dad for advice (and maybe diluc, but diluc's advice wasn't very helpful)

congratulations you are now his personal photographer/j, no but seriously he probably takes on you very aesthetic dates so he can take pretty pictures... to be fair he has a whole folder with pictures of you :3c

he's the kind of person who texts you all the time... he would text you shit like "diluc just fell down the stairs, today will be a great day ❤️", he would probably call you in the evening before you go to sleep and then talk you to sleep

Kaeya is an outgoing person, he doesn't like just sitting around in his room, he would probably take you to a club if you're into that, if not he might just take you on a walk

Kazuha

He's a musician, probably plays music on events and has a YouTube channel where he posts his music...I can also see him having studied philosophy in university for a short time before dropping out when he realized it just wasn't his thing

he's been besties with Scaramouche since Kindergarten and he has been raised by Ningguang and Beidou

Besides english he also speaks Chinese, which was taught to him by Ningguang

You met Kazuha at a relative's Graduation, the school had paid him to perform some music there.... you thought he was pretty handsome and decided to talk to him, it went pretty well and he even gave you his number in the end

his favorite type pf dates are probably spent in his apartment, when the two of you just spend some time together and watch a movie or show... he likes the quietness but the togetherness

he is more into calling than texting, he will just text you a few lines of poetry that flew into his head, he prefers calling because he insists that your voice is his inspiration

Kazuha has probably like 2 Cats called Luna and Artemis, he is a cat person and has a fear of dogs

Ayato

Ayato is rich, like rich rich... he's from old money, his family had been wealthy for years, so kind of all he knows is rich

he has a strained relationship with his parents, since they're pushing him to take over the company... he really enjoys his time with Ayaka she's his baby sister so he kind of always puts up with her shenanigans

he probably took economic courses in school, mainly because his parents kind of pushed him into it, but also because he wants to give Ayaka the best advice he can give

You two probably met on the train, weird place to meet ppl but trust me it works, the train was FULL there was barely space to move and he asked if he could sit next to you, it was a bit of a longer train ride so the two of you started talking to make things less awkward, in the end you exchanged numbers

Ayato prefers texting over talking mainly because he has a full schedule, he send you cute little good luck texts and photos of cute cats, you know the kind with lots of a hearts and blush with a cute caption

he prefers dates at home or at least somewhere in private, he is lowkey famous/people know that he comes from money and it makes him uncomfortable when people see him out with someone because there will probably be talk of the person he is with/you only being in it for the money

Albedo

Albedo is a university student studying chemistry, he got a scholarship for his grades...he makes some extra money tutoring children in chemistry

when Albedo was young, his parents were almost never around so he was pretty much raised by Alice (she basically was his mom at this point), he actually was so excited when he found out that Klee was on the way, he wanted to be such a good big brother

he enjoys going to places by train, because he likes to look out the window, it's hard to explain but he likes to see the scenery rush past him,.... he doesn't enjoy the other people on the train tho

you net him when babysitting Klee, Albedo wasn't supposed to be Home for a few more hours so Alice hired you as a babysitter, but as it turned out that someone canceled their tutoring lesson so he got to go home early, he decided to spend time with you and help you take care of Klee until the evening, he ended up giving you his number

Albedo dislikes both texting and calling, he mush rather spends his time with you instead of longing for you when just seeing a screen, although he enjoys it when you send him cute cat pictures

he likes study dates, or if you don't go to university he enjoys just sitting in a small Café with you, Albedo loves coffee and wants to share that with you, he doesn't mind if you don't enjoy the bitterness and has no problem with ordering some hot chocolate for you

Albedo also likes babysitting Klee with you, and Klee likes being around you because she can see that you make her big brother happy

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

I’m looking for investors for a groundbreaking expedition

If there are any delusional eccentric billionaires who believe the world is flat, I would love to use your money to go to Antarctica and try to find the edge.  As we all know, there’s obviously a wall of ice keeping the oceans in, and with enough of the money you’ve stolen from those beneath you your hard earned cash, I’m sure I can find it!

1909: Robert Peary reaches the North Pole (allegedly)

1911: Roald Amundsen reaches the South Pole

1953: Tenzing Norgay summits Everest

1961: Yuri Gagarin becomes the first human in space

1969: Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin walk on the moon

202X: Florida Man becomes the first person to reach the edge of the world?

With your sponsorship, we can make it happen!  I’ll even let you take credit as expedition leader if you want; you’ll get top billing on the Wikipedia page they eventually write about us, Tom Hanks will play you in the biopic, you’ll be world famous.

Just fork over the cash contact me and we can work out the expenditures.  I look forward to our partnership.