#I'm learning to draw to bring back our beloved boys

[snickerdoodlles]

📒📓📔📕???? Pretty please :3

❤❤!

sometimes @majestictortoise and i toss around story ideas that are less plot and more of us just chucking our favorite things in the communal soup pot and letting them stew. case in point:

Kim and Porsche meet first AU! 🥳

Porsche rescues Kim from mafia thugs

why does Kim need rescuing? unimportant! what matters is Porsche sees a nong in need and rushes to his rescue. Kinn-shaped people get charged 50k baht for his assistance, Kim-shaped people get help whether they like it or not. and afterwards Kim, who's father taught him that everything has a cost and how to keep a mental ledger of favors and debts, tries to pay Porsche off for the help.

Porsche, who's 'tips' have always been for sex work, sees the wad of cash and goes "you want a post-fight fuck????"

Kim, an awkward turtle-duck, bolts away like ???nO????!!!!!!

Kim hires Porsche as a bodyguard

how did we get from "hire me for sex?" to "hire me for protection?" unimportant! what matters is Kim secures Porsche for himself and Porsche thinks "how hard can guarding one moderately popular youtube star be?" and the raccoon shenanigans that ensue. and, of course, Kim finding the connection between their families and investigating his own hire. then 2 days later, because Kim doesn't have a crush to draw out the investigation and Porsche couldn't do subterfuge to save his life, Kim confronts Porsche with his evidence and Porsche goes "what the FUCK do you mean our families are CONNECTED?!" and these two going full gremlin investigator mode together.

Porsche brings Kim home

when exactly does this happen? unimportant! what matters is Porsche and Kim smuggle themselves into the neighborhood late at night, which results in Chay looking up from playing a videogame or doing homework or whatever to see his brother standing there with ✨Wik✨ in his own living room and his first response is "why'd you bring me my favorite musician" because clearly that is the only reason why his beloved older brother, who keeps trying to give him the moon and stars even though he didn't ask for them, would bring home Wik. also;

Chay: *thinks about his idol wall one floor above* Kim: *stares at cute boy* Porsche: i see i'm not needed here

Chay learns Porsche is mafia

how exactly does this come up? unimportant! what matters is:

"he's mafia" "i don't care that Kim's mafia, why are YOU mafia hia!!!!" "...i'll just uh... be over..... there......." Kim says to no one before awkwardly shuffling himself off to a corner.

naturally, this is when Kinn decides to show up

why does he choose now to stop by? because older brother instincts drive you to always be the most annoying person in the room, next. Kim hired a guard out of nowhere without telling Kinn or Papa and the guy's stayed on for longer than 24 hours, Kinn is suspicious as shit and worried as hell. he's been keeping it under wraps, but Kim and Porsche trying to fly under the radar right now gives him a good opportunity to investigate. and lo and behold, Kim appears to have made two new friends, one of whom keeps making him blush and the other who's the prettiest man Kinn's ever seen. Kinn is absolutely not just leaving Kim, he wants to know everything 👀

Kinn, Porsche, Kim, and Chay get snatched ala ep5

why are they kidnapped? unimportant! we do not question kidnapping plots in this household. Kinn, Porsche, Kim, and Chay all escape into the jungle but get separated. Kinn and Porsche have a journey not unlike ep6, except with more yelling, more bickering, and more trolling. Porsche's view of Kinn is colored by Kim not the guards here and then his main introduction is in the jungle not the compound, so he's charmed pretty quickly and judging himself for it every time Kinn falls back on his asshole training. Kinn's main introduction to Porsche is a caring guy who's also a troll and won't hesitate to punch him in the dick when he's being a jerk so...not too much changed there, actually. they are still handcuffed together.

Kim and Chay are having a nice time. bonding over music, trading stories about brothers, asking questions so that they can unravel Korn's 15 year long conspiracy--it's basically a scenic date. they are not handcuffed together because Kim carries three lockpick sets minimum at all times and was out of the handcuffs before they were even out of the truck. Kim and Chay are just holding hands, because Chay asked Kim to hold his hand, and Kim grabbed it saying it's the best way to ensure they aren't separated, and Chay responded "that's nice, but i asked because i want to hold your hand," and Kim blushed bright red. nerds.

the four of them reunite...eventually, idk when, but the first thing Chay does when he sees Porsche across the ravine is holler "DID YOU REALLY THINK KIM WAS PAYING YOU FOR SEX HIA" and Kinn's head snaps around so fast Kim and Porsche get secondhand whiplash.

Korn dies

how does this happen? unimportant! but he's dead before the fic ends.

[[ fics im not writing ]]

[makespaceforspirit]

Collage by K. Ibura

Last month, I ran across a post on IG. It argued that people who like to avoid being seen were often bullied as children. I showed it to my cousin, and I said, I like to hide out but I wasn't bullied as a child. She squinted at me to see if I was serious. "You weren't bullied as a child?!?" she asked, her voice challenging me to think again.

I've talked about my penchant for avoiding the spotlight all my life. I love anonymity. It's one of the things I love about living in New York as opposed to my hometown of New Orleans. I have a big family and everywhere you go, you're running into a relative or a friend or a high school classmate. It's not that I don't want to see and connect with my community, I just like feeling I can live my life without eyes on me.

I've always accredited my comfort in the shadows with being the middle child of five. When there was so much chaos in the house, if I kept quiet, I wouldn't get caught breaking the rules, lol. I've never needed or desired public witness. I have my circle of friends whose gaze I enjoy receiving and I love reveling in the appreciative gaze of a colleague who is in the trenches with me or a beloved who holds me in affectionate embrace. But if the average person looks past me, I'm just fine with that.

Welp, upon closer examination, I can say I was bullied as a child... a lot. I didn't have a bully in the classic sense. There was no one at school who bullied me, no recurring person causing me physical or emotional harm. (My brothers were big bullies at home, but that's another story.) Instead I was consistently and constantly bullied by strangers.

In the 90s, me and my family were oddballs. We were vegetarian at a time where people thought yogurt was exotic. We shopped at Whole Foods when one of its early stores was cramped into a residential building in New Orleans. But what offended strangers was my short natural hair. They were relentless. The simple bus ride from school to home would be full of people's horrible opinions. I got called Grace Jones and Kojak more times than I can remember. And when I wasn't avoiding the glares and wounding words of people who didn't appreciate my hair, I was dodging the advances of men—grown men, young adult men, teenagers. Men were predatory and persistent, sucking their teeth, commenting on our bodies, grabbing our hands, demanding our phone numbers. The public world was a minefield.

For some people, the type of hostility I faced would make them want to change themselves. I never wanted to change myself, I just wanted people to leave me alone. Invisibility would have been a gift. I craved attention from my friends and from an adoring teenage boy who would love me for who I was, but other than that, everyone else could walk on past.

It's funny how the influences of our formative years don't necessarily disappear on their own. I've fought the pull towards invisibility over the course of my entire writing career. I remember when I launched my very first website, I had a tiny, tiny picture of myself with a colored overlay on it. Someone wrote in to tell me he couldn't really see my picture. And I wrote back, what does my writing have to do with what I look like?

All those years ago, I wanted people to love the words, and to my view that had nothing to do with knowing or loving me. So when I pulled A Fierce Desert Flower (as discussed in the previous post) and read its description about being seen, I took a deep breath and let the message in.

Rae Diamond, author of The Cantigee Oracle cards writes: Something in you or in your life is ready to explode in color and presence, and to be seen. And as is the purpose of any flower, this is something that will bring further support to you once you let it show. We all want to magnetize and draw support to us. When bring seen has historically brought the opposite, it is just instinct to shun the spotlight. I've learned that I'm very comfortable being seen when I'm helping others find ways to free their voices and engage with their authentic selves. I don't mind being seen when I'm being a contribution and sharing the challenges and hacks of my journey with others. I still avoid posting pictures of myself and daily slices of my life as much as I can, but have been committed to doing what I can to support a long healthy life for my writing.

Do you struggle with being seen? If so, what encourages you to share yourself against your instincts? I truly believe a harmonious world is one where we all have the space to express our thoughts, feelings and creativity. Those expressions all call for being seen. I will continue meditating on ways to be and express without letting the punishing gaze of my past silence my communications. I will pray for your voice to be unfettered and free!

🙏🏾🙏🏾

Onward!

—K. Ibura

[t41y4k1-n-a-m-r]

Idk guys I can't be the only one that lasts on Nitro+Chiral gory fandoms. I mean TOG and DMMD are my everything...

And not to mention Killing Stalking WHERE IS EVERYONE wtf

[swellwriting]

Serenity

Fandom: Harry Potter ( Marauders Era)

Pairing: Sirius Black x Reader

Request : From @fortisfiliae Hi babs! Can I ask for prompt no. 2 with Sirius? (Wow what an amazing one, much ideas, such interesting.) 💕💕

Prompt: “Where is it?”

Word Count: 2.7 k OOPS

Following rules has always been your forte, it just made more sense to follow the rules, easier. So each year when you got a list of things in the mail stating what you could and could not bring to Hogwarts you tended not to stray from it. If something wasn't on the list there was a good chance you didn't need it.

One thing that wasn't banned per say, but wasn't permitted at this point in time were muggle records that weren’t seen as “appropriate” for school. Your parents had bought you a record player over Christmas and you spent all your money you were gifted on records you knew would be okay for Hogwarts standards, mostly fitting your annoying Head girls standards. The Head girl who enforced every rule in the book, even adding a few she felt necessary. You knew for a fact that today said Head girl was at Hogsmeade, actually most of the population of Hogwarts was, except you, or at least so you felt.

Today was one of those days where your lungs felt heavier, your eyes blinked slower and you felt like you had weights tied to both your ankles, if you went for a swim in the lake you'd probably sink straight to the bottom and drown.

Today was one of those days where you said no to your friends invite to Hogsmeade and by the way you looked at your bed so longingly, an array of Fleetwood Mac records in your sweater covered arms and a messy bun atop your head, your friends let you stay behind without much of a fight. Once the door clicked shut you let out a sigh of relief, you still didn't feel necessarily better but you were on the road there, more so at the side of the road with a thumb held out and you were about the hitch a ride with Stevie Nicks herself, the destination being serenity. You gently took the record out the sleeve as if it were to ever get actually scratched by your smooth palm and soft fingertips that held it you couldn't just magically repair it in seconds.

You meticulously placed the needle down and ran back to your bed, jumping up just to fall onto your back with a huff, your feet up against the wall behind your bed as you laid upside down compared to the regular way to lay in bed. You switched between romantically glancing out the window like you were in deep thought, staring at the boring undetailed ceiling and just looking at your own eyelids as the music flowed in one ear around the circumference of your brain and wisping back out the other, not before engraving itself in your soul and lifting your heavy heart. Music wasn’t magic, especially not muggle music but it had magical qualities, as Stevie Nicks voice filled the room everything bringing you down disappeared, but with it disappeared your need for such mellow music. You had two options, two ways in which you could now fill the void you felt, the void that needed to be filled with different music, loud music, angry music.

Option one was enchanting your record player to increase its maximum volume and somehow charming it to only play “The chain” over and over again until the lyrics were engraved in your brain.

Option two was located at the top of the opposite set of stairs, down the hallway to the right and tucked inside a chest marked with the messy handwriting of Sirius Black. The boy you knew for sure had records that would make your Head girls ears bleed if she heard it, music which was the reason his room was usually charmed with a  silencing spell so no one else had to live through his obsession with muggle punk rock music. No one else aside from his roommates, the roommates you were 99% sure you would have gone with your friends to Hogsmeade today meaning their room would be empty and the records unused and just waiting to be played. It didn’t take much to get to their room, you didn't even bother knocking after placing your ear to the door and listening for any sound inside. You slowly creaked the door open looking and seeing no one there, you entered and quickly tried to decipher which part of the room was Sirius’. You had only been in here a handful of times and each time you were drunk after a party and the room was filled with your friends eager to play whichever drinking game they thought of this week. When you located Sirius’ chest you opened it and grabbed a record, just the Ramones one, an instant classic that you knew you would fit your every need.

Unbeknownst to you, you weren't alone in this room. Remus Lupin was leaving the bathroom when his eyes met your bent over form rummaging through his friends things.

“Looking for something?”

The somehow both quiet and booming voice behind you scared you to say the least as you jumped up nearly dropping the record in your hand but quickly catching it. “Careful now, no sense in stealing something if your just going to break it.”

You turned around quickly with a finger held in the air. “Not stealing, just borrowing. And I wouldn't have nearly dropped it if you hadn’t scared me!”

“Scared you? You’re in my room, maybe you scared me.” You crossed your arms over the record and held it to you chest as if he was going to try to snatch it out your needy fingers. “Oh because i'm super terrifying Lupin.”

You stood there awkwardly, gently gripping the sides of the record not sure what to say next.

“So what are you doing sneaking into our room and taking what appears to be Sirius’ favorite record?”

“I just wanted to borrow it, I just only have a few records and I needed music of ...this velocity.”

“Understandable, though I never saw you as a punk rock type, i'm sure Sirius would love to learn that about you.”

“No”, you interrupted quickly making your way to the door.“He doesn't have to know, not if you don't tell him.” You said backing out of the door not giving him any other option than to accept  your plan.

“I saw nothing!” He yelled as you closed the door and ran back to your room.

What failed to be mentioned in your brief conversation with Remus was that along with Remus, Sirius wasn't gone for the day at Hogsmeade like you had assumed. You were right in guessing that Lily had asked them to join but they had an impromptu Quidditch practice today after a lost game to Slytherin the other night. Although he mentioned that the record of your choice was one of Sirius’ favorite he didn't mention that Sirius listened to it specifically after Quidditch practices, he saved post Quidditch games for the likes of “The Clash” instead. So as you lied down in bed, cast a silencing spell and let the angry and loud and catchy music fill the room and your ears; Sirius was simultaneously just getting back to his room, freshly showered and prepared to do exactly zero homework and sit in bed. Remus watched with a knowing smirk on his face as Sirius seemed confused why he couldn't find his beloved vinyl.

“Where is it?” Sirius asked more to himself than to Remus/ like he had been the one to misplace it and never assuming someone snuck into their room just to steal it.

“Where is what?”

“My Ramones Record, you know the-”

“The one you listen to after every Quidditch practice you have ever gone to? That one?” Remus asked innocently. He may have lied when he said he would keep your little secret for you, maybe because he didn't have the patience to watch Sirius tear the room apart to look for it or maybe because he knew Sirius’ secret as well, the one where he admitted to having a crush on Lily’s quiet friend who didn't come around often enough.

Sirius turned around to face his friend with his eyes squinted at him and stated calmly. “You say that like you know exactly where it is.”

“As a matter of fact I do!” Remus held a cocky tone with him, like he was the puppeteer getting ready to pull your strings and force you and Sirius to interact. “Your favorite friend of Lily’s has it.”

“Why would Y/N have my favorite record?” Sirius tried not to draw attention to the blush surfacing on his cheeks at the mention of you.

“She is borrowing it?”

“And you let her!” Sirius frustratingly threw his hands in the air and then let them rest tangled up in his hair like having to talk to you was the most stressful thing he would have to encounter.

“Of course, she has a face you just can't say no to, she seemed like she needed it.”

“Of course she did it's the best album ever, what am i supposed to do now?”

“Go get it, you idiot you know where her room is don't you?”

And with that Sirius gulped and accepted the fact that if he wanted his record back he would have to go get it. Sirius closed his chest and casually pushed his hair away from his face causing his friend to mutter a “You look fine”, from behind his book.

When he got to your room, unlike you, he knocked but you couldn't hear him, both from the silencing spell and the loud music. He swallowed his fear, which was unusual for him to feel when it came to a girl, but usually girls made it obvious when they liked Sirius but you were quiet in that sense too. Sure you were nice to him but you were nice to Remus to and what was he even worrying about he wasn't coming in here to propose he was just asking for his record back. As he opened the door and took in the scene his feelings grew for you tenfold. Maybe it was the slight way you bobbed your head to his favorite songs, maybe it was the way you laid upside down on your bed that was so enticing he wanted to lie next to you and bob his head with you, but he stood still letting the door close behind him making you sit up startled, you blushed embarrassed when you realized he was there. Sitting up on your bed and bringing your knees to your chest you smiled sheepishly at him as he grabbed his wand and lowered the volume of your music.

“Nice taste in music Y/N, but stealing is not nice.” He teased as well as he could, trying to act his usual self but being alone with you made him nervous.

“I wasn't stealing, just borrowing. I assumed you would be at Hogsmeade all day today, it would have been back in your room before you got back, you wouldn't have ever noticed.”

“I didn't even know you liked The Ramones.” He said quietly like it was to just himself as he sorted through the few records you had. “Fleetwood Mac, Abba and the Beatles, quite a variety you have here.”

He left the record playing and walked towards you. ”I don't know a lot of things about you.”

“What do you want to know?” You asked sweetly playing with the fabric of your sweater as you spoke, he stood in front of you and you had to bend your neck back pretty far just to meet his eyes with yours. “I want to know what made you steal my record over anyone else in the school, and why it had to be my favorite one of them all.” He smiled playfully biting his bottom lip just the slightest as he looked down at you.

“Well, your the only person I knew for sure had something i’d want to listen to, and hopefully wouldn't be too mad at me if he found out i’d taken one.” You imitated his smile as you brought your knees down, no need to feel guarded or hide yourself around Sirius. Maybe there was part of you that hoped he would come searching for his record, maybe you wanted this, wanted him here. One thing you knew was you were going to take advantage if this situation.

“Well right you are, I do have the best music taste in Hogwarts.”

“Oh do you have a plaque that says so?” You were quick to tease him, conversation was easy with Sirius. You lied back down and put your feet against the wall turning the music back up and closing your eyes with a wide smile from ear to ear like you were trying to pretend Sirius wasn't even there.

“Oh I see, you’re just gonna ignore me and drown me out with my own record?” He yelled.

“Well what do you want with it?”

“I would like to listen to it, I always do after a Quidditch practice.”

“Well what are you hearing right now?”

“Oh ha ha, Y/N, hilarious really! But i’d rather not stand here and listen to half of the record.” He tilted his head to the side as he looked at you wanting to just lie down beside you but not having the courage to take make that move. You opened one eye and looked at his pouting face, you grabbed his hand closest to you and pulled him down onto the bed to lie beside you nearly squishing you since it was such a small space. He made himself comfortable as he matched his feet with yours against the wall and flicked his wand to restart the album. You just looked at him, examining his face not caring if it was weird to stare this long and he looked right back and you laid like that for a while, not even paying mind to the loud music.

Sirius broke the silence smoothly tucking a piece of hair behind your ear as you closed your eyes in delight at the small touch,“You tired?”

“Yeah”, you agreed quietly not opening your eyes.

“A long day of thieving and heist planning”, he more of commented than asked.

“Hey it would have worked if I had known your schedule better.”

“Would you like to?” Sirius asked with a hopeful look on his face that you couldn't see as your eyes were closed and sleep was slowly pulling you away.

“Well my schedule tomorrow is hopefully going to include taking you to Hogsmeade and upgrading your record collection, everyone went today apparently so it should be nice and quiet there.”

“I can’t listen to most records here even with a silencing spell my Head girl is a nutcase.”

“I guess you will just have to come to my room then.”

“Yeah I guess so.” You smiled as he pulled you closer against him, you intertwined your leg between his and snuggled your head against his chest. This was far better than an serenity you had known before.

You weren’t going to fall asleep you thought but as Sirius flicked his wrist and put one of your quieter albums on you repeated that thought in your head, I won’t fall asleep , I won’t... fall....asleep.

It didn't take long for Sirius to fall asleep once you had, your slowed breathing and the unusually calm music playing, he couldn't help it. Maybe it was also a reason for him not to leave yet, to enjoy being this close to you. Lily was beyond surprised when she came back to the room and saw two of her friends who had never even hung out alone before cuddled up lying the wrong way on a tiny bed, she just turned the record player off so the silent record would stop spinning and quietly closed the door behind her not wanting to ruin your moment.

Tag List: @sjriusblck @theboywhocriedlupin @moonlitdiggory @wanna-see-my-lease @moonynprongs @bluemadcnna @starlitfawkes @dyngflwrs @jamcspotters @siriuslyimmoony

[t41y4k1-n-a-m-r]

I'm learning how to draw to bring back our beloved Nitrochi boys ♡

Wish me luck