#I'm gonna go read the 3rd book in the Skyward series by Brandon Sanderson

[uwudonoodle]

Can I just rant for a minute? I just finished one of the worst books I've ever read. (It was for a book club, otherwise I never would've picked it up.) It was Terms of Endearment (spoilers ahead), which is a recognizable and popular book, adapted into an award winning movie. I don't care. God, it was so terrible. The epitome of everything I hate about literary fiction: It's set in the most drab version of reality. Every character is an asshole, who cheats on their spouse, and then dies.

This is supposedly a story about adults, yet they all had the emotional intelligence of impulsive teenagers. I lost track of how many affairs there were. There was destruction of property, drunk driving, assault and battery, two attempts at murder, domestic violence, dysfunctional marriages, child abuse, narcissistic manipulation, and just downright cruel behavior... I'm exhausted.

I hate all of these characters. Even the most empathetic ones eventually turned on me. They were not interesting. I know people like them in real life, and I actively avoid them. I don't want to spend time with these characters (the audiobook was 15 looong hours). Who finds this entertaining (if you do, my apologies)? Even in the end when a character was dying, I had trouble drumming up any sympathy. I kind of wished more of them had died, seeing as none of them really grew or became better people.

Maybe the book club was a bad idea. I'm at the point in my life where I don't have a "to be read" list anymore, and I don't take recommendations. I just pick whatever book strikes my fancy in the moment, because my entire childhood I had miserable books shoved down my throat. I only pushed through this one because it's another member's very favorite, and she's wanted to do it for a while. We all deserve a turn to pick the book. (I think mine is next month. 🤞)

And no, I don't think it necessarily builds character to read things outside your comfort zone. My mental health took a nosedive this last fortnight. I don't want to live in reality right now let alone read about the worst version of it. I want my stories to restore my faith in humanity, not push it further over a cliff. Anyway, I'm going to go read a whimsical story about space pirates to cleanse my soul from the fictional version of "Am I the Asshole?" where everyone is unquestionably the asshole.