#I'm gonna be 24 soon
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[Oct 18th 2024]
Just once can I remember to write here every day for at least 1 week in a row? Probably not lol
A while ago a bunch of kpop albums arrived at my place that I had ordered with online friends together to save on shipping, and now that everything has been unboxed and sorted I finally got to packing everyone's items. Idk why, but I just love packaging things. It's very peaceful.
I also got an email from my goverment appointed youth guidance person for disability aid. Since I'm currently unable to work we had talked about me doing something like a volunteering gig or a weekly activity at a community center or something of the sort. Turns out a community center a little bit away from me is starting a weekly creative space for people with disabilities or mental health issues who want to engage with other people in a safe space under guidance. And since I love to paint and draw, my goverment person thought this was perfect for me so she sent me info about it. And well... It IS perfect for me. Hopefully.
In 2 weeks I'm gonna find out if it really is cause I'll meet with the person organising it to see if they can offer what I'm looking for. I'm really nervous but also very excited. It's getting a bit lonely at home with just my mom and only seeing a friend once every few months. I need something to leave the house for.
Speaking of leaving the house, I actually went to an aquarium 2 days ago! I've been recovering from the exhaustion ever since I got back which is why I haven't written about it yet. I'll probably sit down and write about it tomorrow. If I remember 🤭
For now here's 2 pictures from 2 days ago:
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Okay time for 3 positive things about today!
My mom made freshly baked pizza for dinner!
After lunch Storm came to sit on my lap and started kneading on my sweater while purring like crazy 🥺
A singer that I really like, Rosé, dropped a new song with Bruno Mars and it's so much fun. Go check out Apt! I'm gonna link it in the post for you
#it's actually my birthday in a few days#I'm gonna be 24 soon#mid life crisis? maybe#obviously not midlife#but I feel old#okay now some actual tags#dear diary#diary#life update#Spotify
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My sympathy for Snape in POA has gone a hundred times up now that my shitty grandmother is potentially going to be using our house as an inn
#my dad phoned me to tell me and i just broke as soon as he spoke#like i couldn't even handle it#i was so unprepared and it was so sudden and i have so much trauma from that bitch that i broke at once#the last time she stayed she traumatised us#so yeah fun times#I'm literally going to be holing myself in my sister's attic room until she's gone because that old hag is gonna have to take mine#and i am not even going to come down if she's in this house. at all. ever.#so i can only imagine how awful it was for snape to have remus there 24/7#like it's the worst feeling ever to have someone like that and you cannot be okay#my dad's literally gonna take my brother to go pick her up so that the old hag will keep her mouth shut#it's just a mess and it makes me think of how Snape must have reacted when he learnt lupin was coming#severus snape#pro snape
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employment jelly really is that bitch
#got contacted for an interview today not even 24 hours after applying. absolutey miraculous stuff#yes i am relieved yes i am also afraid for my life. i can do both. i'm a great multitasker#what's annoying is if i wasn't such a wreck rn for stupid reasons beyond my control i think i'd barely even be nervous for this one#like if a wizard (well-meaning pharmacist) hadn't cursed me (lowered my testosterone dramatically for no good reason)? i'd be chilling#alas.#whatever. i'm getting that fixed soon so if i can just keep it together for 30 minutes on monday we are gonna be so fucking back#wish me luck!!!!!!!!!!#text posts
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-- Jojo Tichakorn twitter post 26.11.2024 with Winny & Satang: Waiting to welcome the prince.
#it has been almost 24 hours and i'm still processing this#that summer#that summer series#winnysatang#winny thanawin#satang kittiphop#jojo tichakorn#*photo#s: twitter#w$tag#good thing happened to them and me in november#i'm so gonna write my full thought on the mock trailer soon. on my sideblog.
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THE VOICES
#my dc posting#RATA#<- my made up cartoon abt the robins that i've become obsessed with. im making up episodes and shit this is fun!!!#17&18 are the real reason jason went rogue i'm sorry for putting the emotional damages so close#and well. i think you can guess what episode 24 is. hhueheuheue#at the rate im going im gonna start drawing fake title cards soon lmao
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hello tumblrinas i'm back and better than ever has anyone watched my lady jane
#went through my tag last night............i'm never leaving tumblr again shsjhsjshjsh#set my queue to 24 posts a day and it's still gonna take a week to get through everything so. <3#614 and 615 layla sets coming soon btw !!!!!!!!
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Can I tell you about the guy
My favourite guy
Such a guy
Guy
(This too is poetry)
#Can you tell I'm sleepy
That is indeed poetry
I would love to hear about the guy
#i gotta warn you i haven't slept in over 24 hours so I'm likely gonna pass out soon#answers❗#esteemed robyn
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just wrapped the first christmas present of the year ❤️
#for my friend who hates presents of course 😂#its the stupid teddy bear onesie he has magically instantly putgrown BOTH the previous times i got him one it fit him for like a week 😤#so i got it in the next two sizes up and that's that!!!!#babies grow so fast wtf never buy clothes as a present for a baby that's all i can say#but i can't accept defeat so here we go#his mom will appreciate it even tho she doesn't like getting presents tho lol#and its insane to give christmas presents before thanksgiving but for all i know this baby is gonna outgrow them both by then#i literally bought the size 9-12 months like last month#i ordered it immediately after his mom told me she THOUGHT HE WOULD BE IN THAT SIZE SOON#and it was already too toght on him when it arrived a week later 😭#so now i got size 12-18 and size 18-24 this baby's gonna be cozy this winter or else!!!#i cannot afford this btw#the original onesie was pretty cheap it was o. sale for like $17 but then i bought it twice#and the size maxed out at 9-12 months#so i had to upgrade to a toddler one and it was $22 and i got two of them again plus shipping#and i only make 14 dollars an hour and i'm lucky to work even two days a week at my new job lol#im putting off getting a second job until after i cover a coworkers maternity keave in feb tho bc then i def would be full time#for at least 6 weeks#and its possible she might decide not to come back or another aide would leave by then#so i might have an opportunity to be full time by then ir at least close to that#anyway#no money november fr 😔#just realized my tags are confusing my friend is the mom not the baby 😂#she's the one who gates receiving gifts bc she feels awkward lol#but she's broke af and can't afford clothes for her baby let alone cute ones and she loved the onesie when she fot it at her baby shower#but then the baby came a week and a half late#he was supposed to be a march baby he was born in april#and all of a sudden it was too warm for the onesie and he inly got to wear it once#so i was like ok i will get another one in the fall/winter then#but alas
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god gave me an easily distracted mind because he knew i’d be far too powerful if he didn’t
if i could focus and finish my wips like i want to, it’d be over for y’all. and we just can’t have that

#✮tori’s rants#fr tho i would have a lovely fic library if i finished my wips. but it's like my brain shuts down the moment i start to write#no matter how much i want to i can't keep focused. im out here taking an hour to write 500 words when really that should take me 20 minutes#especially if i know EXACTLY what i'm gonna write like come on you just have to type out the words in your head it shouldn't be that hard🫠#you know the distractible podcast? that’s my brain 24/7 lmao#anyway choso drabble coming soon lol#writeblr#writers block#writer problems#procrastination is a bitch#writing is hard
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FFXIV Write Day 6: Halcyon
“What are you doing?”
Azem looks up at him, their eyes dancing with that bottomless sense of mirth. “Is it not obvious? I’m making flower crowns.”
They present the flowers to them then, pretty little things Emet-Selch could not name even if he tries. He knows he’s seen some of them before, their depictions classic in literature, with their gentle white petals or bright sunshine hues, but there are many others that he doesn’t. Unusual multi-colored leaves attached to the stems of gentle cool-toned flowers, some with petals more geometric than round.
“Do you even know what flowers you’re working with? They could be poisonous.”
They laugh, though Emet-Selch would not know if it was they had caught his ignorance or if it was that Azem, as always, charged ahead despite the dangers without a care. “Only one way to find out.”
And before he can protest, they reach for a disorganized pile, pull something out of it, and plop it on his head.
He sputters, reaching for the apparently finished crown Azem had been hiding, because of course they were, but doesn’t remove it from his head. “I wasn’t aware I was summoned to be a test subject.”
“A test subject, and company,” Azem’s grin, somehow, broadens, as they resume weaving the stems together with practiced movements. “It’s been a while since we’ve been able to see each other.”
The tone shift is jarring, the wistfulness in their tone almost unexpected. The words are a gentle punch that has him slumping beside them.
It’s true that it has been some time since they had seen each other. Things have been busier as of late. Azem was out on adventures, as always, and some of the others among the convocation had been sent away from Amarout for miscellaneous tasks.
Some might call it fortuitous that his responsibilities had sent him Azem’s way, for once, though Emet-Selch would vehemently protest and insist the universe was playing some sick joke on him instead. Truly, the others underestimated Azem’s penchant for trouble, somehow doubling whenever he was in the vicinity.
“Do you think the three of us will see each other again?” Azem whispers, enough that Emet-Selch has to strain to hear it.
“It wouldn’t take much to get Hythlodaeus here,” Emet-Selch murmurs.
Azem laughs, but there’s something about it that’s off. Like a cry, squashed away and hidden away. The stem between their hands snaps, and Azem stares down at their hands forlornly. “Maybe it wouldn’t have, once.”
“We’ll be together again,” he insists, setting his hand on their shoulder. The touch is enough invitation for Azem to lean over, into him, bonelessly collapsing in a way that he was all too familiar with. In seconds, their head is in his lap, and his fingers are now in their hair, playing with it with practiced ease. The flowers Azem had been weaving fall away, some rolling back onto the ground while others cling to their robes and tuck themselves within the folds of the fabric.
There’s something soft and torn in Azem’s gaze as they look up at them. Their hand, now free of flowers, rises to trace his jaw and settle on his cheek. All the joy Emet-Selch is used to seeing on Azem’s face is gone, as if it had never been there at all.
“Not for many more lifetimes,” they say, mourning, and Emet-Selch’s own heart sinks deeper and deeper with the weight of it. “I won’t regret it, but I am sorry, my dearest Hades.”
“Thalia? What are you—”
“You can’t hold onto me forever. It’s time to wake up now.”
As if a spell is cast, his gray robes shift to imperial black, white gloves distance him from the softness of Azem’s hair, and he can feel their solid weight against him fading away.
“Thalia, wait.” He grasps her wrist, he blinks, and they—she flinches when his hand tightens its grip. Those damn eyes of hers are wide, the exact same shade of violet, made brighter by the light of the Rak’tika Greatwood. “What were you doing?”
“I…” the Warrior of Light clears her throat. “I was just getting this out of your hair.”
As if proving her point, she rubs the stem of a leaf between the fingers of her captive wrist.
“Why bother with such a paltry detail?” He snaps.
Ellida is silent for a long moment, her expression shifting only into a deeper frown.
“I was surprised to see you asleep,” she says instead of any meaningful answer.
He scoffs, drops her wrist. Truthfully, he doesn’t know if he wants the answer himself, at this point. She had ripped him away from that moment of peace so long ago, tainted the memory with her very existence. No answer would satisfy him—there was simply no excuse that made her action so forgivable.
“Am I not allowed a moment of rest? I certainly thought you and yours would have preferred I kept my distance.”
She puts more space between them, now that the choice is hers. “We do.”
“Well then, go make some distance, for however long you can.” He waves her off. “Do you not have better things to do, hero?”
She’s staring at him. It’s uncanny, how long her gaze lingers, as if she sees something he doesn’t. Her lips are pressed together, something thoughtful in the lines of her face. Whatever had her attention drops away with a quiet sigh.
“Yes, I do.” Even so, she hesitates. “Will you be alright?”
“Excuse me?”
“I—” she shakes her head. “Nevermind.”
Without another word, she’s marching off, leaving behind a moment that, Emet-Selch knows, is best forgotten.
#ffxiv#ffxivwrite#ffxivwrite2024#azemet#implied hythazemet#astersatdawnfics#me: i'm gonna write fluffy hythazemet#this fic: lol no you're not#what can i say i like angst#tho before i wrote this i did end up rereading some old ficlets of hythazemet i wrote back in 2022 after i finished endwalker...#i may be thinking about posting them#that's a later me decision tho#lets see how much catch up i'll be playing today#cause i still got days 3-5#and the day 7 prompt is coming out soon#i just did this one first cause i wanted to try and do it within 24 hours xD#am i calling it close? yes. did i do it? yes :D
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My mother confuses the fuck out of me
#i guess she's getting severance checks from her old job?#i mean fuck that's the least they could do after she worked there for 40 years#she only gets 900 a month from my dad's SSI survivor benefits#she went from saying we're struggling financially to suddenly offering to pay for shit i need#that kinda scares me because i think that means she's impulsively spending her savings. which could mean she thinks she's gonna die soon#she's 64 and my dad died at almost 63#like she helped my sister buy my niece a car. it's a 24 year old vehicle and only costed 4k and she paid 2k but 2k is a LOT to us#she said she's been saving my rent money to fix my car for the past couple of months on top of me saving for it#which means we definitely have the money to fix everything by now#but that's not happening all my tires still need to be replaced my ac doesn't work it's making clinking sounds#it stalled while i was driving the other day but turning it off and restarting it fixes it#anyway. the thing is I'm always sus about my mom offering shit.#she likes to hold shit over your head.#I'm very worried that she's gonna fix my car and then use that to control me in some way. because that's how it is every time.#but like.....it's better than not having the help. fuck.#i feel so privileged despite how broke and disabled i am. bc most disabled people dont have this to fall back on#the craziest thing is that the only reason we have this house is bc of my grandparents' inheritance#and neither of them went to college my grandpa was in the army#and my grandma only temporarily worked for jc penney as a bookkeeper#side note my 80 year old grandma was better with computers than most elderly people are today#just from that job? from what i know#when she died my family sold the family house and that's how we put the down payment on this house#which btw only costed 64k in 2012 apparently it's worth 175k now according to zillow#but like. how. i feel like my family being white and christian is the only reason we have all this privilege#i have a headache bye#.bdo
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help I have too many ideas
OK SO I love to make kandi and I've already made two other kandi sets for ships I like sooo I wanna make an ineffable husbands set to round out the big three
now the way I make my ships sets I make two charaiter specific kandi then a single that represents the ship itself using a quote from the show
but here's the thing I HAVE TOO MANY IDEAS FOR THIS sooooo I'm letting tumblr decide my fate
note if you wanna give me a suggestion: the quote can't be too long cuz it still has to fit around my wrist
I tested all of these out and they do fit with all of us against all of them being the longest soooo I'd say roughly 30 character limit and that includes spaces cuz I need to put a bead in between each word
plz reblog I seriously need help deciding :]
#I know I know a nightingale sings isn't a quote from the show BUT I like the idea sooo it's being put on the poll anyway#good omens#poll#polls#throwing up my thoughts onto tumblr again#I'd make all of them but 1 I'd run out of color combos and 2 it would make my kandi ship sets unbalanced#speaking of colors I'd make this 24 hours but it's prob gonna take me a bit to get the colors I want for this soo this poll will last a wee#I mean I already have some beads I'd like to use but some of them I have far too few of soooo#gonna have to prob make a craft store trip some time soon#but I'm in no rush to make these :]
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not to overshare on main but I DID download a dating app impulsively and ended up getting a few matches which has done wonders for my self esteem but anyway I just...idk I just feel so stupid about everything and not sure where to start I just feel like I’m so behind everyone else my age in regards to dating even though I know I’m no the only one Anyway
#personal#and it doesn't help that my family does not think i should be dating and i get WHY but I also feel like they perpetually want me#to stay a kid in some ways even when i'm gonna be 24 soon like!!!#i think it's bc I'm autistic and my parents think i can't deal with this kind of thing
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Aywin the Half-Elf for @foxieflower
#Aywin the half-elf#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 spoilers#baldur's gate oc#dnd oc#don't mind me I'm just gonna stare at him for 5000 hours#that's just what Vanquish does on a daily basis tbh#5000 hours in a 24 hour period#he makes it work#Just like Aywin works that dress#also i'm literally gonna remake all of these gifs soon#because we changed vanquish and aywins looks for our 3rd playthru#and yea i just need to immortalize all their forms
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Is humanity ready for New Visual!Kaguragi and Rita in-suit+helmet off though
#sorry all my brain is 'KINGOH ONLY HAS 24 EPISODES LEFT'#i'm counting down#bye if i don't rewatch ch1 i'm gonna suffocate soon#mon mon
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The constant mental tension between, “Please tell me you won’t hate me if I make bad art” and “Asking for reassurance can be a compulsion.”
#mc13 and her ocd#I'm...I'm gonna have to make good on the 'sending recordings to mutuals for Exposure Therapy' promise soon and. TERROR.#I'm also gonna have to suck it up and get over my stage (Internet?) fright in the next like. 24 hours. to post that poll propaganda song#*chanting over and over while banging pots and pans* IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE IT'S FOR A--#what's that one part of climbing uphill? it's like 'I am a good person. I'm an attractive person. I am a TALENTED PERSON. Grant me grace'#...yeah#I'm sorry I keep harping on this I just don't know what else to do besides throw my thoughts somewhere to Get Them Out
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