#I'm convinced they're that bad that everyone would double take and ask if they're actually the official villains

[luvevee]

Sada and Turo taking first in the "worst parent" competition, effectively making all the other actual villains with families wigged out from their absurd cruelness and stupidity.

[fireemblems24]

Golden Wildfire Ch 15 (Final)

Guys, I think this is finally it, the last chapter

MAIN STORY

We're . . . not going to get an answer about Shez, are we? Would I if I recruited Byleth?

Which, now that I think about it, that was really anticlimatic death.

Also, Claude wants Dimitri and Faerghus to survive, but Rhea to die. Edelgard doesn't want Dimitri and Faerghus to survive, but also wants Rhea to die. So why the hell is Claude letting Edelgard right Dimitri while he fights Rhea? What's stopping Edelgard from killing Dimitri and taking all the Faerghus land she desperately wants? He knows Rhea was only an excuse for her.

I guess just another "Claude is an idiot" point or the writers not giving a single shit about him or this route and only caring about Dimitri and Edelgard.

Claude is suddenly reading Dimitri's mind. He thinks Dimitri wants him to dissolve the central church. This is . . . beyond stupid. Claude is literally imagining the enemy wants he wishes the enemy would want. This is such a stupid thing to do in war. Dimitri has never showed signs of wanting the church dissolved.

Also, blaming all of Fodlan's problems on Rhea is so dumb and such childish thinking too.

They really were like, go Claude, we'll give you nothing! in the writer's room.

If I cared about Claude, I'd be livid. I doubt many Dimitri or Edelgard fans are upset though.

Man, the character list is so much smaller in this route.

MAP/SIDE BATTLES

So annoyed this one has a bunch of side quests. I'm sooooo close to finishing this game.

Aww, an Alliance NPC talked about how much she likes Seteth and hopes he survives.

Ouch! Yuri! When he questions the validity of Claude's plans, Shez assures him it's the only way to pave the future, and he has the audacity to say "I guess now isn't the time to be wondering who exactly is included in this future we're dreaming about." He's calling Claude out on his shit big time. Yuri just does not fit here.

Ashe keeps talking about Dimitri. He's miserable.

Hapi doesn't want to kill Rhea :(

Ohhh, interesting, so Raphael doesn't like how we've been fighting. Shez can agree or disagree. I agreed in both SB and GW. In GW, she says their actions are too haphazard, but in SB, she says they're being too brutal and not letting anyone surrender. Curious differences (ofc Raphael just wants to eat and party, that's what he disagrees with, it's Shez's perceptions that made me interested).

Gilbert and Dimitri talking. Dimitri arriving has boosted moral. But it's the same for his enemies.

Dimitri's concerned about Rhea and learns that they're prepared for battle. Dimitri can't help them :(

Dimitri ordered his citizens to evacuate because he's worried about what the Alliance will do, but isn't convinced Claude wants to destroy his Kingdom.

I love Dimitri doubling down on protecting his people above all else here. Gustave is upset about abandoning Rhea. Dimitri is too, but he's willing to be the bad guy if it saves a single life in Faerghus.

A side mission involved defeating Cyril :( And now Flayn :(

SHEZ & RAPHAEL A

Soldiers are happier. Shez can guess war turning in our favor or pay raise.

If you ever needed proof that Raphael is an idiot, he argues that wouldn't make sense because not everyone is motivated by money. Like, seriously, tell me a single soldier there who gives a flying shit about what some king says. The only route this wouldn't be true in is AG since they're fighting for their lives.

Anyways, it's actually the food.

Shez talks about how a good meal rather than scapes is a good motivator. And honestly, good point.

Raphael talks about being an innkeeper. Honestly, he'd be such a fun boss to have, but he'll need to hire someone to handle the logistics lol.

Raphael asks Shez to tag along. I can either be nice and agree or not make promises. Being mean to Raphael is basically bullying.

Shez either way still considers being a mercenary, but I love the idea of Shez and Raphael running an inn together.

LYSITHEA & RAPHAEL A

Wonder why they choose Lysithea of all people to reach A with Raphael.

She studied too long and is out after dark, so obviously scared. She tries to convince herself the weird noises is Raphael.

But it's not this time, bc he shows up and asks what's the creepy noise lol. Poor Lysithea.

Now she's properly freaked out. Poor girl.

It's probably just a cat, but she thinks it's a ghost.

Lysithea goes to investigate too or else she'll be alone.

I guessed wrong. It's a puppy, not a cat. Poor doggy is hungry, and Raphael knows the dog.

Lysithea is like, if you knew the dog, how come you didn't know that? lol.

HILDA & DOROTHEA B

A fan gave Dorothea a bracelet, and she appreciates the support. Hilda wishes she had one too.

Dorothea tells Hilda no one is better in the whole army at makeup and accessories.

The support addresses how Hilda makes her own accessories.

Dorothea talks about plant design trends. So like real life lol.

Hilda asks Dorothea about her makeup. She tries to stick for ones that are actually good for the body. Which, is really good considering what they used to use for makeup.

They want to keep chatting over tea.

Honestly, I love seeing two girls just chat about girly things without anyone putting it down.

It's nice, in general, how the Fodlan games don't put down the women who are really into fashion and the ones who don't care. Everyone is allowed to just exist, and it's great.

LYSITHEA PARALOGUE

Does she get her own because her paired up one is in SB?

She apologizes to Count Glouster for all the chaos Ordelia causes, but he apologizes for not taking care of it. She understands how important it is for him to protect the bridge.

Her father is buddies with Lorenz's father.

Shez comes with news about Ordelia under attack.

No one else can help. Lysithea says she didn't realize how Claude could be so cruel. Shez tries to defend him by saying she's all the way out here, and Lysithea claps back. Team Lysithea here.

Shez thought Count Glouster would we dead weight. She was right. Idiot almost died. Shez and Lysithea were fine.

He looks forward to the day both aren't leaders anymore so they can just be friends and thinks Lysithea would be a worthy heir :( Poor Lysithea, she faltered at that.

Glouster did nothing to help Lysithea's father because he led the pro-Empire nobles.

MARIANNE & YURI A

Yuri sees Marianne out late and worried that she was going to leave like she thought about, but she was just walking her horse.

Then we get the classic "..." and "..." response. Since the ye ole days characters have done that in FE supports.

Marianne is like, why were you worried, then goes off how she's just a burden, and Yuri is like stop that, now.

Yuri is allergic to horses and cats? :((( Poor guy. That would suck.

That's why he was always giving Marianne funny looks, because he was about to sneeze and she's always around horses, lamo.

It's nice seeing Yuri be nice. But if he was mean to Marianne, like how can you be mean to Marianne?

Yuri dreams of being able to spent time with the animals he's allergic too, so he accepts Marianne's offer to use magic to try to help. I hope it works.

HILDA & DOROTHEA A

Hilda is trying to figure out what's wrong with one of her accessories. She thinks it's missing something.

Dorothea offers to help out, and is really impressed with Hilda's craftsmanship. And honestly, there's a picture and it looks pretty.

Hilda likes Dorothea's suggestion.

Dorothea also offers to buy the accessories for the opera, and use that to advertise them too.

Hilda is more than happy with that suggestion.

Hilda actually wants to open her own school to teach people craftsmanship, and thinks she can partner with Dorothea on that too.

MARIANNE & IGNATZ A

A pegasus that Ignatz was helping said "bring me more hay, four eyes." to Ignatz, Marianne interpreted. She rightly called it rude lamo.

Ignatz used to ride pegasus with his mother, she used to be a pegasus knight. I wonder if that's why he wants to be a knight.

He was really impressed with the view, understandably.

It made him want to become a pegasus knight, but they're sexist lol. Women only.

That's why he wants to help with the pegasi so much, it's the closest he can get.

Marianne is like "I can feel your feelings in the paintings" and Ignatz freaks out until she keeps going and saying she can tell how much he loves pegasi. I wonder what he was so worried about . . .hmm . . . Liking Marianne just proves taste though.

Marianne thinks that maybe the pegasus will accept Ignatz. But I don't think it went well lol. She grabbed his clothing with her teeth, not on her back. OMG, poor Ignatz.

It ends with Ignatz begging for Marianne's help lamo.

MAIN (& FINAL) BATTLE

Alright, guys, this is it. 2/3 done once this battle is over. Sadly, I'll probably have to kill Rhea though. But who knows, she got to be the hero of SB in the end, maybe GW too, or is that asking too much?

Rhea's like I should've killed these bitches years ago (rather than protecting them after turning her genocided family into weapons, poor woman has seen some shit).

Rhea thinks she'll have the goddesses' protection. Too bad Sothis is dead :(

It seems like Rhea is expecting to die. She's telling Seteth and Flayn to run. And saying her time is at an end.

It's funny that Rhea also thinks she's fighting for the future and humanity because she thinks she knows what's best. She and Edelgard (and Claude in this route) are really the same. Then there's Dimitri, the only sane one who doesn't have a bloated ego that thinks he knows best for every living soul in Fodlan, in some case, without ever even talking to some people from a particular country (looking at you, Edelgard, ding dong thinks she can rule Faerghus better than Dimitri without ever even having bothered to TALK to someone from Faerghus).

OK, so why did Edelgard only get 40 points, but Claude gets 70?

OMG, one of Claude's tactics is to burn the enemies alive (elite archers turn enemies into ash, not sure how else to see that).

I don't want to kill Cyril two times in one night :( Thankfully, he retreated.

Great, now Alois is here, claiming he'll fight to the death, which seems major OOC even with Rhea under attack. This game really forgot that he had a family, didn't it? I think he, Claude, and Caspar got the biggest downgrades in writing.

Oh, shit, he died for real. And he mentioned his family this time.

I had to fight Seteth too, but he retreated, thankfully.

DON'T MAKE ME KILL MERCEDES!!!!

Oh, fuck, Cyril died :((( God.

Jeritza came to save his sister :(((( So he turned against the Empire in GW. That's kinda touching, much better than in Houses. Seems Mercedes is now flipping, better than having to kill her like poor Cyril and Alois.

Now I have to fight Flayn :( Thankfully, she withdrew.

Now I have to fight Seteth and Flayn again, but on the upside, Rhea did badass magic and took away my captured strongholds.

I'm not clear if Flayn died or retreated, but Seteth is pissed off at me.

Oh, thank God, they're both running away.

Time to kill Rhea :(

Cut scene time. Wow, Claude, that's rich. He's telling Rhea to go walk away. But, to like where? The guy's been hell bent on killing her and blaming her for everything from racism to arranged marriage this entire game?

Why the random flower getting crushed? Usually that's a sign of crushed renewal, not a brand new world like Claude's been blowing smoke about this whole route.

Lololol Idiot just realized Rhea's the Immaculate One.

Lamo, even in the final battle Marianne's not convinced Claude not coo coo for coco puffs.

More cut scene. Shez and Claude killing Rhea. Shez turned into Arval. Wonder what happens if you recruit Byleth.

This was such a watered-down version of SB's final battle. They both had Rhea as a final boss, but SB got Thales too and it was A LOT harder because of that. Either that or Lorenz is really that silly stupid good.

Another abrupt, non-ending.

Claude wanted the war to end, and shock of all shock, killing Rhea didn't work!!! The idiot. All those people died, for nothing. I also predict greedy assholes will still enforce hierarchies and be racist, even without Rhea.

This ending may have been even worse than SB's? Because at least Edelgard still has a goal she's working towards, it just cut off mid-way. Claude accomplished his and nothing changed - he only made the world worse.

Are either GW or SB better endings if you get Byleth? I'm betting that's what happens. Because that can't be the real ending, lol.

MVP time. Wonder when it'll turn into the Lorenz show. As soon as Ch 5, pretty much no one but Lorenz got MVP. He's just absurd, but in a boring way. He's invulnerable to damage, but doesn't play very fun. If I ever did GW again, I'd main Lysithea. She's a unit type I like way more, hella strong and fast, but low defense. Lorenz made GW super boring to play since I didn't have to think at all. He's that good of a unit.

It's funny seeing nothing but Lorenz's face on an endless scroll (except paralogues or like, women units only battles)

I can't believe I'm getting a letter from Lorenz. If I knew I'd get a letter, I would've picked a character I actually liked, like Marianne. Hubert's letter was better. Lorenz's was really generic.

Still pissed there's no paired endings.

And these endings are so bad, wtf. I'm glad I did this twice so I know AG is also just going to randomly end.

xxx

[star--nymph]

4, 19, 30, and 31 for eury and cullen c:

OC Ship Ask

4. Has either OC ever gotten a hickey off the other? What was their reaction?

Eurydice has a thing for biting, so Cullen has been the victim of more than just hickeys over the years. Cullen has mixed feelings for it because he very clearly loves being bitten (especially in the moment) but the side glances he gets the next day, Maker. He's heard every damn joke in the book about it. He's tried to half-heartedly stop her before she does but, ya know, he really doesn't want her to. At best, he's stopped her and told her where she can bite him so he doesn't show, which is really the best compromise they can come to because unless Cullen says 'I hate that, stop it' Eurydice's gonna do it. And he's never going to do that considering it gets him just a tad excited to see what's she's done to him in the mirror next day. I mean, she's offered to heal the mark away too and you'll notice he waves it away. All I'm saying is hmmmmmmmmmmm.

19. How good are they are communication?

At first, no. They're both notoriously bad at discussing feelings and would rather jump into the Fade (again) than sit down and deal whatever's actually bothering them. The thing about Eurydice and Cullen, though, is that I don't think they could have survived as a couple without communication. Eurydice needs things to be made clear to her or she just won't notice it--and if she knows something is wrong but not what, she's liable to keep asking until it blows up in her face. And frankly I think Cullen needs to be able to say what he needs to say without being judged for it. He spent decades containing the worst of his trauma and all it's done is hurt him and everyone around him. The good thing is they are also two pragmatic people and tend to attack problems head on. The two of them sitting down and saying right out that there won't be secrets, or double meanings between them. They will talk about it because they have to. Are they always good at it? No. But, that's why it takes work. You can't change yourself over night, no matter how much you love a person.

30. Describe how one character would cheer the other up after a hard day.

When Eurydice was nearly sick with stress during Trespasser (both from trials of motherhood and from political bullshit), Cullen made a day where he took all her mounts out to an open field out in the country, and had a picnic made for them. They left the children to be watched in Skyhold and he brought her out there, told her she can do whatever she wanted--the field is big enough for her to race any one of her mounts, and they're all content to graze and relax with her. It was one of the rare times he's ever seen Eurydice honest to God cry, nearly collapsing his arms from the sheer relief. They spend the day and night there, pretending like maybe this could be their lives forever. It couldn't be, but for the time being, it was a wonderful dream.

31. How would they describe one another.

Eurydice: "...Brave. Inflexible. Loud. Very loud. When he must make his opinion known, he speaks like the crows caw. Caw caw caw. For hours. Stubborn, stuck in his ways--like a...a stick in the mud. That is the term, yes? Yes, A stick in the mud. I've see halla like him who will ram their heads repeatedly into the gate because they are convinced one more slam will get them out of it. They will not notice they are bleeding because of it or they were put there to rest, they only keep going because they disagree with the situation. That is very much like Cullen. I told him once and he stared at me for a good minute with his jaw twitching. I believe that means he did not enjoy the analogy, but then I am not good at those so perhaps that was it. ...I occurs to me that I am not describing him correctly. I am doing my best but you are asking me to put him into words and I can not. I can not. You have to see him to know him. He is irrational and tiresome and broken and-and bright. Bright when he is happy, when he is brave. When he fights and when he tries. Even when he's hurt, he will go on because it is not him to give up. He does not know how. I have had him weep in my lap and beg for lyrium, and when those tears dry, I have watched him force himself up and say 'to work!' He would die then...then give up his capability to change and be better. Ma ena'vun. Evanuris aan atish’an ar hamin. Hamin." Cullen: "You want me to... -clears his throat- Even if this was any of your business I wouldn't know where to-- -sighs- The Inquisitor--Eurydice, that is, is a force unto herself. I doubt there is a single person on this continent who could string a single sentence together that would properly describe her--except maybe Varric and he'd only embellish everything to a ludicrous degree." "You're stalling, Commander." "S-stalling! I'm not--Eurydice is...unimaginable, alright? She scares me, she enthralls me, she frustrates me to no end. I've been baffled into silence more times than I could ever count by her just opening her mouth, much less by everything she does. You're asking me to put into mere words a woman who has sewn asunder in the sky back together and lived after a mountain fell upon her, and who is so obsessed with a baby halla that I've witnessed her trying to carry the thing up six flights of stairs. I feel like we've somehow trapped an otherworldly creature sometimes. And--Maker--despite all the blood she's spilled and all the questionable decisions she's made, I've never met someone who is so utterly...kind. Not to most but when she lov--when she likes you, she's the kindest soul. I don't...know what else you want me to say. Just go watch her; you'll be at a loss for words as well, I expect."

[splatteredfandoms523]

Ghost of the Manor (Ch. 6)

It's been over a year since Jamie and I have been together!

The Septiceyes are always gushing about how cute of a couple we are. Chase even nudged me and said I should put a ring on it. I just whispered to him that I was going to. I had a plan.

Sometimes we go on dates with Dark and Anti. Yes, I'm not just calling him the glitch anymore. Turns out he isn't as bad as I thought he was. I was too bitter to see that until I actually talked to him.

Dark and Anti have both changed for the better, and I'm just happy that everyone's happy now. Tonight, we're going on another double date. I have big plans for tonight. I'm going to do it. I'm going to ask him. I need it to all be perfect.

We're going to our favorite restaurant that has a fantastic view of the forest outside. Jamie always loves taking in the sights. We're going to sit out on the patio in the setting sunlight as the waitstaff light the lanterns. The lighting needs to be perfect. We'll order our favorite foods. I'll convince him to share a glass of wine with me. The food and wine will put everyone in a good mood. This restaurant never disappoints.

Then, I'm going to do it.

I'm going to ask him to marry me.

I really need him to say yes.

I don't want to miss my chance and screw this up.

I don't want to hurt him.

But I won't.

Tonight is going to be perfect.

Dark and Anti both think he'd be crazy to say no. They say that of course he'd say yes, he loves me.

Anti has never seen him this happy before.

Dark has never seen me this happy before.

Let's hope they're right.

I got Jamie to the restaurant. I sit us with Dark and Anti. Dark gives me that look that says 'Just take a breath'. I'm trying to breathe. Jamie has no clue. We make small talk, talking about where to shop for good ties and bow ties. We get the food and the wine. We eat, and I manage to not make a mess of myself. Anti is the best wingman, as he pulls Jamie into conversation by having him look at something on his phone as I pull the ring out of my pocket. When they finish, I tell Jamie I want to show him the view.

He never says no to that.

Then, I point out the sunset as they light the lanterns on the patio.

I make a corny joke about him being the best view as he stares out at it all.

I get down on one knee, and I ask him.

"Jameson Jackson, will you marry me?"

He tears up, hands going up to cover his mouth as he nods and kisses me, "Of course, my love! Yes! Always yes to you!"

We hugged and kissed under the lanterns of the patio and the sunset light. Dark and Anti clapped and took pictures. They sent out a group text to all the Ipliers and Septiceyes. Everyone is sending congratulations. I feel like the happiest man in the world.

Everyone I talked to said he would say yes, but I was so nervous.

We made it back home, and he spent the night with me. He fell asleep on my chest as I play with his hair. I still can't believe it. He said yes! My wonderful, lovely, adorable Jamie said yes!

Tags: @southerndragontamer @iamvegorott

[tuiyla]

what do you think santana’s coming out would have been like if she hadn’t been outed?

Oh man that's a question and a half. I was legit so thrown off by that. Not in a bad way! Always appreciate Santana questions, always. I just spend so much time being mad about what actually happened and being absolutely appalled by Glee dropping the ball this badly, it's hard to even approach the topic without that in mind. Even while thinking about this I caught myself wanting to curse the canon events out multiple times. But I'll show restraint and pretend, for a few blissful minutes, that season 3 doesn't exist the way it does. This post is going to be more of what I would have liked to see instead of what realistically could have happened because Glee lost out on my willingness to care about their established boundaries when they vomited The Outing scene onto my screen.

In my ideal world, Santana would have been allowed the baby steps she deserved. Sure, she was way deep in the closet in season 2 but by the end we see progress. She's so clearly isn't ready yet and that's fine, in this timeline we're not pressuring her in any way. It's early season 3 and she and Brittany are officially together but only they know it. It's a bit of an open secret in the Glee Club, too, but everyone, and I mean everyone knows better than to think it's any of their business. Around the time of one of the the Troubletones rehearsals Mercedes catches Brittana making out and Santana freaks out, initially. Brittany reassures her that Mercedes is their friend and it's fine and later we get a Sancedes scene. Santana at first tries to deflect but Mercedes lets her know that she isn't there to judge or anything, she just gives the advice that Santana would be happier if she embraced herself and all that usual Glee speech. After the Troubletones WRONGFULLY lose Sectionals and Quinn gets the girls back and Santana sees how ND welcomes them with open arms, she makes a decision.

It feels safer to make a public Glee announcement first. They sing a duet with Brittany and Britt does the talking because Santana is more comfortable letting the song (Melissa Etheridge's Come to My Window, maybe?) speak for her. No one is shocked but they're all supportive, especially the people who matter (*cough* the girls and Klaine *cough*). Will tries to make a speech, blah blah, it's just a wholesome scene. Ideally a Kurtana scene follows because this is my headcanon I do what I want.

Now people who already sort of knew are in the clear but it's limited to the Glee Club and none of them blabber to other students, particularly not in the hallway because they're good people who love and support Santana. Based on Santana's heartbreaking "I haven't even told my parents yet" I'm going to choose to infer that she was thinking about it. She's terrified and needs a Pierce family dinner, together with a supportive Whitney and Pierce Pierce to convince her she's ready for this. We get to see the actual scene, around Christmas time, with Gloria Estefan and Dr. Lopez and it's emotional but cathartic. They're with Santana, no matter what, though her dad does have an ominous line about Alma. Not in a rude way but in a way when a parent fears what might await their kid. Santana staunchly refuses the subject of Abuela and asks her parents not to say anything to anyone.

The school year goes on. Valentine's Day comes around and following some homophobic shenanigans at McKinley and Figgins revealing the same double standard as he did in Heart, somehow, Santana decides to take a stand. She kisses Brittany very publicly in school one day and maybe we do get a slightly altered version of the Heart God Squad storyline. Except she gets to beat up Joe because I said so. All is relatively well. Santana and Brittany are now practically out to the school and Santana shows concern every now and then, but she feels lighter. This timeline actually deals with the fact that she wouldn't suddenly have no fears about being out and jerks exist, but it's easier that she did it on her own terms and not through a political ad.

Regionals rolls around and Dave is outed. I'm sorry David in this timeline your fate is unfortunately still the same. We get the attempt but thankfully Dave survives and recovers. Santana visits him in the hospital, they have a conversation and it makes her realize that life's too short to be terrified of who she is. The final puzzle piece in this portion of her coming out story? Abuela Alma. And so Santana goes to her grandmother, tells her about having had time to reflect and the coming out goes much the same as it did in the only valid IKAG scene. And Alma rejects her much the same, breaking Santana's heart and causing her to lash out at the people who have been supporting her these past few months. After the initial shock of just having been disowned, she picks herself up and thinks about Dave and how she can't let others' opinions of her define her life. Santana's clearly shaken from the experience and it gets brought up time and again but she marches on.

Santana starts college and decides she's going to be upfront from the first moment on. She tells people about her girlfriend, how proud of her she is, how much she loves Brittany. When they break up, the strength fades as Santana already wasn't feeling the whole Louisville vibe. Canon events ensue, and when she moves to New York she gets to truly just be herself and live her sexuality for the first time. That doesn't just mean sleeping around, thought some of that too. When she gets together with Dani and meets her cool queer friends, Santana feels at peace. It took a minute, but she's fine with casually dropping the word lesbian and introducing herself as, well, herself.

I know that last bit wasn't necessary for the coming out journey itself but it's good for my soul to think about. I can't say what I've written is tremendously exciting but imo it's what she damn well deserved. This didn't actually answer your question in that I don't think this is what would have happened; Glee demonstrated that they had no desire to follow through on Santana's story with the care it deserved. But it is what I'd like to think.

[ryyukk96]

Hello, good evening to everyone <3

I'd like to know your opinion of Uchiha Itachi. I think this character is a failure. Kishi could have made a masterpiece of him, but he took the easy way out. So, what do you think of him? Is he a hero? Or a psychopath on a grand scale? Has he really escaped the curse of the Uchihas? Does he really deserve his fans?

Physique: I've got nothing to say about that - the fangirls and fanboys are right, he really is handsome.

Originality: For that, no, Itachi isn't original. We've seen the dark-haired dark-haired bad guy who's actually nice and a double spy a hundred times, although personally, I think even that's a failure. My favorite Harry Potter character is Severus Snape. Itachi is exactly like him, so why don't I like him? We'll see about that later.

Character: Inhuman. Boring. Cold. The list goes on. I have nothing against cold characters, on the contrary, three of my top 10 are cold, namely Tobirama, Madara and Kakuzu. Except that they're HUMAN. Tobirama gets angry at his brother and Naruto, makes fun of Minato's technique names, gets angry at Sasuke. Madara has a sense of humor (cf. Obito's flashback and when Naruto arrives on the battlefield), we see his suffering at the death of his brother, and he's really nice, but that's another subject, Kakuzu argues with Hidan, worries about him, Kakuzu argues with Hidan, worries about him, loves money (yes, it's love, even if it's for banknotes) whereas Itachi is a void, he doesn't talk to Kisame (I'm not asking him to chatter like a magpie, but to use at least one complete sentence with subject, verb and COD, the minimum! But even that he doesn't do) But when it's about Sasuke, the guy suddenly has emotions! In short, he's heavy, cliché, tries to give himself a mysterious side (in vain), and behaves like a real asshole (he traumatized Deidara with his shitty Sharingan).

Story :I really liked Itachi, he was one of my favorite characters in part 1, I even saw him as one of the main villains, along with Orochimaru and the Akatsuki leader. But after knowing the awful truth (I don't thank you for that, Tobi), he was kicked out of the VIPs with my shoe in his face (from BG). I'd have preferred 100 times over that his parents and clan put too much pressure on him as a child, so that he went crazy and killed everyone. Or limit him to a megalomaniac who kills everyone because he's worth it. In that case, you just get inconsistencies as big as the perfect Susanoo. Seriously, he had a choice. Stop saying he's a poor victim, he could have used the Koto Amatsukami, or tried to convince his parents, or proved, by bringing Tobi back to the village, that the Uchiha clan had nothing to do with Kyubi's attack. But no, it's too difficult, better to slaughter them. What the hell, it's his family! There were kids, women, old people, civilians... And he killed them! And his poor parents who refused to fight him, who loved him and were proud of him to the very end!

Besides, Fugaku asked him to take care of Sasuke, and what does he do? Tsukuyomi, take that in your mouth, little brother! It would have been more merciful to kill him. He's ruined her life, and made her suffer. All for nothing! War was going to break out sooner or later, and it wasn't the massacre that stopped it. His love for Sasuke is selfish and possessive. As soon as he sees Sasuke happy, with friends, re-Tsukuyomi. And he told Sasuke to kill his best friend so he'd be strong enough to beat him. Can you imagine if Sasuke had killed Naruto at the Valley of the End?

He was also supposed to be a spy within the Akatsuki. I recall that Konoha had no idea of the identities of the members, knowing only Kisame and Itachi. He could have given them the names, but the Konohanians would search the Bingo Book and bingo! They got the information they wanted. He could have said that the boss is called Pein, runs Ame and has the Rinnegan, instead of letting Jiraiya do the work and die because of it. He said absolutely nothing about Tobi. For a spy, he's really failed throughout his years in the organization.

He fails to implement his plan, his Plan B too, since he used Shisui's eye on himself, he doesn't even try to reason with Sasuke, it's Sasuke who follows him to get the answer. He doesn't even try to make up for his mistakes!

What I reproach Itachi for is failing miserably at everything he does, behaving selfishly with Sasuke, forcing him onto the path of vengeance and traumatizing him for life, having had everything, but everything to make him a unique and interesting character, but who in the end turns out to have no real depth, a mere cliché.

I'd love to hear your thoughts on the subject ;)

[bayesic-bitch]

To clarify a bit, when I say "I don't think consciousness is real", what I mean is that I don't think qualia or any other dualist positions explain what I think is most relevant about consciousness -- the fact that my experience forms a part of my cognition that I can act on.

Coming back to your examples though, I think you're perhaps taking a less strict form of the "qualia can't cause physical events" thing than Chalmers actually argues for. I want to call attention to these two statements in particular.

Of course, I have no method to convince you of this. And so, unfortunately, if someone is dedicated to the notion that my claimed observations are in error, I can't make them believe otherwise

Explaining away consciousness as a result of erroneous thinking is like explaining away the observation of black swans by saying that Australian ornithologists are bad.

I'm getting the impression your view is something like

I have qualia, which are part of my mental processes and decision-making, and I can clearly express their presence.

these are caused by some dual substance not reducible to physical properties

they have a small enough effect on the brain that they're observable to me, even if they're not observable to you.

I want to be clear, this is not consistent with what Chalmers is arguing. In both of your examples (double slit and black swan), there is some kind of observation of the event that the skeptic refuses to explain directly. This is not the case with qualia. Qualia are defined specifically as a component of mental states that do not cause physical events, ever. And because they never cause observable events, it is categorically impossible to make an observation that would imply they exist. It's less like "how do I explain black swan events, even though they're hard to observe" and more like "how do I prove the existence of God while maintaining that the universe is deterministic and He never works miracles." This is the weirdest and most unintuitive thing about non-interactionist dualism. Qualia aren't "weakly unobservable" (unobservable by anyone but you), they're strongly unobservable (categorically unobservable by you and everyone else alike).

We can think of causality in this sense as being like a directed graph. If Event A causes Event B, then we have an arrow going from A to B. Then a diagram of the non-interactionist dualism looks like this

Since qualia are causally isolated, we can have events going from the physical events (white) to mental events (green), but not vice versa. Qualia/experience can never cause physical events. They're a black hole that information falls into and never escapes from. Critically, this also means that they cannot be the cause of your claim that you experience consciousness. We have to explain that without appealing to qualia even if we suppose that qualia exist. So when you say something like this

I am pretty sure I experience things. My reasoning is vaguely reminiscent of Moore's "here is one hand" argument. I would say that I'm more sure I experience things than I am of anything else;

Chalmers thinks that your belief in your own experience is just as incorrect as Dennett does. If you could actually notice that you had qualia and form beliefs about your qualia, you should never ever be able to actually articulate and act on those beliefs. If you could, then there would be a causal arrow from "experience" to "claim". Then we could put you in a psych lab and show you things and ask you to push different buttons based on what you experience. We could design experiments that test what your qualia are, and how they make you react to different simuli. With that data we could in principle build a scientific model of how qualia work and incorporate it into physics. But this is specifically the thing Chalmers says is impossible. The whole point of introducing qualia is to show a kind of not-scientifically-explainable dualism that's compatible with physics. Since there are no arrows from "experience" to "belief", Chalmers's naturalistic dualism demands that you be wholly ignorant of your actual conscious experience. So Chalmers still has to explain why you have this unfounded belief in qualia, just like Dennett does.

Coming back to why I find this unsatisfying: Qualia for Chalmers are not a part of your decision-making or your behavior. Every human action and every claim about your experience can and must be explained without reference to qualia themselves. I don't find this to be at all a good fit for how I understand my own experience. My intuition about how my mind works is my internal experience is very much a part of how I act. When I see a beautiful view at the end of a hike, I want to stop and take it in! when I watch a tearjerker movie, I react to that! A view of consciousness that separates my experience of these things from my reaction to them does not answer the questions about consciousness that, to me, feel most relevant. Maybe Chalmers is happy with qualia going one-way from the active physical world to the inactive mental world, like being a movie projected to an empty theatre, but I'm not.

How could consciousness possibly not be real? I'm here perceiving shit and having internal experience all day. Surely you are too. So is "consciousness isn't real" just semantics, playing with the definition of "consciousness"? Or what?

So, this comes down to two main arguments: 1) I don't have to explain consciousness, I just have to explain your perception of your own consciousness and your belief that it's real, and 2) consciousness being real but not acting on the physical world does nothing to explain the former anyway -- odds are you're categorically wrong about what your own experience is.

We talked about 2) last time this came up. But to recap, basically the idea is that Chalmers and other modern epiphemoninalists avoid the problem of dualism breaking physics by taking this position: the world can create internal experiences, but internal experiences don't act on the world. Physical events can cause qualia, but qualia cannot cause physical events. This is necessary because if qualia could cause physical events, then you could observe that effect scientifically. Once you observe it, you can study it, quantify it, and then you would have to make a place for souls in the standard model. Very few philosophers think that's likely. But if qualia can't cause physical events, that poses problems too -- namely you saying "I see a red apple" is a physical, observable event, so it can't have been caused by qualia. So under this view, all your reportable beliefs about your own conscious experiences have no causal relation to your actual conscious experiences. And while it's conceivable that your beliefs about your qualia just so happen to line with your actual qualia despite there being no connection, that seems like an absurd coincidence -- there's no reason to believe that you are correct about any of your qualia, ever, and we know for sure that our conversation here is causally isolated from both of our actual experiences.

And all of this is something Chalmers & co are willing to accept, because at present it seems like this is the only way to make substance dualism work and not contradict physics.

@nightcore-nasheed mentioned that there's a similar argument for property dualism, but I'm nowhere near as familiar with it, so I'll leave that aside.

Now we can return to 1). At this point, we've proposed a view of consciousness that "takes consciousness seriously", but this does nothing to explain our belief in our own consciousness. Dennett in particular wants to say that this is the only thing we need to explain. I don't have any direct, voiceable evidence of my own qualia. I know I feel things, and I know other people also say they feel things, and those are the things I need to explain. The solution is then to turn this into a psych/neurobio problem -- why is it that we have persistent beliefs in our own consciousness? Is it evolutionarily helpful to have such a belief? There's a couple not-absurd answers you could have here. For instance, when the brain is Turing-complete or nearly so, it is necessarily impossible to deterministically model our own thought processes (because of the halting problem). We must necessarily view our own minds as being irreducible to themselves, even if they are physically reducible. And extending this notion to others simply involves generalizing from our own experiences.

If this seems unsatisfying, well, yeah, a bit. But as we said before, substance dualists are also committed to a position like this, because they hold that the brain acts purely independently of input from qualia. To an epiphenomenalist like Chalmers, consciousness is still an illusion in the brain, it just also happens to be correct for unrelated reasons.

So the position of Dennett and other more-or-less reducible physicalists is: why do this? why add the bizarre complexity of an extra-physical realm with no evidence to support it, if it doesn't even explain why we say we are conscious? Better to just accept that our belief in our internal experience is incorrect and try to figure out why than to add all these extra hoops to jump through. Besides, our conversation would be causally isolated from both of our qualia anyway -- since they can't affect our conversation no matter what, it's categorically impossible to learn anything useful about them by talking about them. So what's the point in even discussing this view in the first place?

There are other positions taken by non-reducible physicalists, but personally I've never found the explanations for why physical systems can be non-reducible particularly convincing. So for the time being I'm stuck with the reductive physicalists. I can't say I'm happy about it, but I don't see a better option. In reality, I feel like this is one of those problems that's better dissolved than solved -- somewhere along the line we probably made a mistake formalizing this problem, and eventually neuroscience will come along and render the question moot without actually resolving it. .

[hwrryscherry]

The one where Harry & Model Y/N do a interview together.

NOT MY GIF

blurb: Harry and Model Y/N do their first ever interview together on the Late Late Show with James Corden and they play "Spill Your Guts or Fill Your Guts".

word count: 2.12K

I loved this concept SO much!!! And I really hope you guys like it too. Thank you anon for requesting this😍😍😍

The Late Late Show with James Corden producers called you and Harry trying to book you both to be on the show and to an interview together. You have to admit it that you got nervous; of course you had been through tons of interviews before but to do a double interview with Harry is a whole new level. You both are really private about your relationship and it's kinda rare to actually see one of you talking details of it, and it also had something to do about the larries fans. You were really concerned about them, you never want to disrespect them or even upset them in some way, even though some of them made fun of your relationship, they're still Harry's fans and you respect all of his fans without exception. But anyway, after a lot of talking between your management and between both of you too, you agreed to go and also felt a lot more comfortable because it was going to be with James, that was already friends of you guys.

It was set up that you both will be playing a game in the show called ''Spill your guts or fill your guts'', which actually worried you a little because of the hard questions but besides that, you were really calm, Harry made you calm. He was so great at calming you, I think it's the fact that those past 2 years you both had been through ups and downs and you got quite great at calming each other. And by the way, your man looked SO nice! You were kinda matching actually, as you both were wearing grey. You were in a grey suit and Harry had a grey sweater on looking stunning.

James called both of you on stage and you entered smiling and waving to the crowd as yoi walked towards James's direction. Harry gave him a big hug and you followed by hugging James as well. You both sat in the couch besides James's desk as the crowd got more silenced.

— It's so great to have you here! — James said to you both as he sat down on his chair — Honestly, I really thought you wouldn't accept!

— Oh, Y/N didn't want to! — Harry said quickly making you give him a slightly slap on his arm — Sorry, we had to discuss it! — Harry corrected himself making the crowd and James laugh.

— I never said I didn't want to! I said WE HAD to discuss it! — You corrected him making an emphasis on the ''we had''.

— Alright that's acceptable! Anyway — James looked at the papers on his hand and then back at you — How are you guys doing? I feel like I haven't seen you both in months because you always disappear!

— We've been good! — Harry said while playing with his rings in his hand. You crossed your legs as James stared at you. You couldn't help but start laughing a little because he was fixedly looking at you at that made you a little nervous!

— Yeah, we're pretty good! It's been a nice year! — You answered honestly — And we don't disappear! We just... I mean, I feel like there are times when we actually kinda get away from the world a bit. I truly don't know why. We just focus on spending some quality time together as a couple because we both work so much and we spend a lot of time traveling so it's something really important to keep the relationship stable. And we do it specially in the begging of the year, because that's when we celebrate our anniversary, so I guess it's just a habit that we have to disconnect and enjoy our time together so we can just focus on us and what we expect from the relationship on the following year. And it's the best time to do it because the holidays just happened and he have a little no work time to really be just us.

— Oh right! And how long have you been together by the way? — James asked, he actually knew the answer of that because you're all pretty great friends and you and Harry actually hangs out a lot with James and his wife.

— It's been two years now! — You answered.

— Yeah, it's been a bit now! — Harry completed.

— Oh so, you both weren't dating on the VS Show 2017? Because there were a lot of rumors by the end of the show! — James asked.

— We were not! We actually met at the VS, we took a long time to actually start dating, we started dating in early january 2018, I guess — Harry answered as he slided his hand on his perfectly styled hair.

— Oh, I see... And do you guys plan the future? — James asked making you and Harry exchange looks while smiling at each other — Oh, I like that look... Marriage? Kids? We ALL want to know!

— I mean... yeah! It's almost impossible to be this long in a relationship and not plan it! — Harry said — And I feel like we enjoy a lot of the time we spent together, it's been quite a journey and it's nice to have someone that you really care about and you want to have a future with by your side at some of the most important moments of your life, but I think we both agree that we still have a lot of things to experience before taking this step, you know, the marriage step. But yeah, I can't wait for a time when this is going to be a thing for us! I'd marry her in a heart beat and she knows it! — Harry said. He looked focused while talking but as soon as he felt your gaze towards him, he blushed and started smiling like a little boy who just got his favorite candy.

— So, you won't pop the question anytime soon? — James asked teasing Harry about his reaction over your gaze. As James were close friends with you guys, he knew how much you loved each other and actually everyone could see how Harry kisses the floor you walk by. He is head over heels for you and he melted anytime your hand touched him and anytime you smiled or even looked at him. Everyone who was close to you guys would know that you're the one for him and he's the one for him.

— I mean... — Harry had a cheeky smile on his lips — Who knows.. The year is just starting, 2020 it's a new year!

— And what's your thoughts on that, Y/N? — James asked looking at your blushed and smiley face.

— I agree with whatever he said! I was actually too distracted admiring his beauty to hear what he said. — You joked making Harry blush even more. You were head over heels about his man and this man only, totally in love with him.

— Alright so, on the next block we'll "Spill your guts or fill your guts'' where you'll see Harry Styles and Y/N Y/L/N answering the most crazy questions! We'll be right back! — James said to the camera that stopped filming immediately. You both stand up and walked with James to the other spot in the stage where the game was set up. It was a big rounded table with some of the most disgusting things you've ever saw and smelled. Apparently James wasn't going to play with both of you, but you could also see there was bull penis, cod sperm, chocolate cockroaches, hot sauce, 1.000 year old eggnod and banana smoothie in the table. But anyway, you just chatted with Harry and James until it was time to start shooting again.

— So, we're back, and we're about to start playing ''Spill your guts or fill your guts''. — Harry said as the camera started filming again — And apparently, I'm going to host this part, unless you want to? — Harry asked looking at you across the table.

— No, you can do it! — You answered as you sat straight in the chair looking at the things in the table — I'm nervous I've never done this before.

— Oh yeah, you've never done it! Well that's exciting! — Harry said before letting a small evil laugh leave his lips making you laugh as well and roll your eyes — Ladies first! — Harry said and you took a deep breath before taking a paper card in your hands. — So what am I eating? — Harry said as you both looked to the table.

— I guess...hum.. you can stay with the hot sauce! — You said cheeky smiling at him spinning the table to put the hot sauce in front of him.

— You know how much I hate hot sauce! — Harry said frustated while looking at the sauce.

— I know! — You said right before you whispered a low ''oh god'' before reading the paper — I love this! — You said laughing a little — Alright, Harry explain to the world the meaning of ''Watermelon Sugar'' — You said laughing as you watched Harry's face goes red when he listens to what you asked.

— Well... — He took a deep breath before laughing a little. He's face went completly red as he thought of explaining it — I guess it's about, hum.. Giving pleasure...to your significant other...hm.. by eating a watermelon! — He said pausing a little containing his laugh. Of course everyone knew the real meaning of Watermelon Sugar but neither of you had ever actually defined it with the exact words about the meaning.

— Alright! That was good!...Very convincing! — You looked at him with a slightly mocking expression as you saw Harry trying to decide on what he's gonna make you try.

— Let's go with the banana smoothie! — Harry said with a huge malicious smile on his lips.

— No fucking way! — You said immediately. Harry knew how much you hated banana, actually you'd rather die than eating a banana, so he just laughs — Harry...

— It's a game! You gave me the hot sauce, I'll give you the banana smoothie! — He said and you tried your best to do your pity face, even with the doggy eyes basically begging for him to chose everything else except the banana smoothie. — Alright, alright — Harry sighed making you smile as he now changed the banana smoothie to the bull penis. It was bad, but way better than banana. Harry got a paper card and laughed a little when he read what was written — You're one of the most notable supermodels on your generation and also are friends with some of the greatest models from your time. Rate Kendall, Gigi and Bella to best to the worst catwalks.

— Oh god! — You covered your face with your hands making Harry laughs out loud. You looked at the bull penis quietly and then at Harry again — I feel like I could answer, right?

— I feel like I could answer! — Harry completed putting an emphasis on the ''I could'' making you laugh and then slide your right hand through your hair.

— We've talked about this before, I know, but it was a healthy gossip between a couple... — You said staring at Harry's face thinking — I'd say... — You started but then stopped as the crowd cheered a bit.

— Just eat the penis! — Harry says quickly after letting out a long breath and making you laugh a little by the controversing of the words of your easily jealous boyfriend.

— If I might say, I'm very surprised you're asking me to eat another penis! — You answered quickly seeing Harry's eyes widen at you as he had a big smile on his face.

— I mean, it's just bull penis! — He said and you just agreed looking at the penis again — I mean, I could help you answer this.. Blink twice if the worst one is...

— I'M EATING THE PENIS! — You shouted getting one of them in your hand and just throwing it in your mouth chewing it slowing with a very ugly face because you knew Harry would actually say it, he can be the next gossip girl. — This is disgusting! This is probably the worst thing I've ever putted on my mouth.

— That's funny I thought you liked a penis in your mouth! — Harry said lowly making you literally choke and spit the bull penis in the small bucket you had in your hand and then drinking water as you tried to contain your laugh — But I mean, how much horrible things have you ever put on your mouth, right?

— That's not the point! Focus on the game! — You said as you looked through the rest of the things in the table — As I ate the penis, I'll give you the cod sperm so we can match later. — You said positioning the cod sperm in front of him — Actually, how did they got the sperm out of the cod? — You asked and Harry laugh looking at it as he said he had no idea. You picked another paper card and let out a loud laugh — I LOVE this game! Between Niall, Louis, Liam and Zayn, rank their solo careers to best to... — You laugh at the exact moment Harry covered his forehead with his head. He got the napkin beside him and wrapped it around his neck, then he got the fork with the cod sperm and stared at it quietly.

— Just put it in your mouth and swallow. Don't look at it! — You said innocently making the crowd laugh and Harry to look at you with a mocking expression while trying to contain his smile.

— Right, because ''don't look at it, just swallow'' fixes everything. What are you gonna tell me now? Should I spit or should I swallow? — Harry joked making you laugh realizing what you actually said.

— I mean, I'd swallow it! — You said joking back while holding back your laugh. Even though you were actually shy, you and Harry were used to always making sexual jokes so it was normal to you, and very funny too as you'd do it all the time. But Harry did as you said and threw it in his mouth, but he spit on the bucket beside him. It was your time again and he chose the chocolate Cockroaches and read the last question.

— Who is the most surprising celeb to ever slide into your DMs? — Harry asked making you smile thinking if you should tell it or not even though you knew exactly who it was and so did Harry. You'd always tell each other when someone flirted with you because this helped a lot to deal with all the being extremaly jealous story — WHO IS HE? — Harry joked making you let out a laugh.

— I mean.. I'd say you, for sure! I was really surprised! — You said making him smile because even though he knew you were very excited when he answered your DM, he was definetly not the most surprising celeb to slide into your DMS but he accepted the answer either way.

— Alright, this was fun! — Harry said finishing the game and then the camera came back to James and the new guest of the show.

You and Harry left the studio of The Late Late Show in NYC and grabbed dinner at a french restaurant in the city exactly like you both said you'd do in the end of the night. In the restaurant, you basically talked about the game and how fun it was to do this together and how much you loved going through new experiences together and how much you wanted to see what the future will bring to both of you, because even though the future was uncertain, you both had 100% of certain you wanted to spend it together.

[uncloseted]

how do i learn to think for myself and do my own research before forming my own opinions on issues? how do i find unbiased sources? i feel like i'm too easily influenced my own good. like if a blog i like say "bloobo beeping is bad and everyone who ever blobbed is a beep" i will start to think its true even though i dont know if it is or doubt it. especially if the person i admire and trust their opinion.

This is a great question! We often talk about how media literacy is really important, but we don't always talk about how to actually evaluate the information that we get.

Finding an Unbiased Source

The first thing I would suggest is checking out the Ad Fontes Media Bias Chart. This is a resource that ranks sources based on their left-right bias and how factual their reporting is. The sources that are at the top towards the middle and middle-left are generally trustworthy. The ones below the green line should be treated with caution, and may be trying to convince you to take a particular point of view. If you see a person talking about an issue on social media, it's best to assume that they're towards the bottom of the chart unless you have reason to believe otherwise (they're a journalist associated with a respectable news outlet, they're an expert in their field, etc).

Logical Fallacies

Once we know what sources are generally reliable, it’s important to understand how data can be distorted. This is a good introduction to some of the common logical fallacies that are used when trying to convince people of a point. Logical fallacies are common types of mistakes that people make when putting together an argument, and they're important to look out for when you're being introduced to a new idea. Logical fallacies are especially common on social media sites like Reddit and Tumblr, but they also appear in more “official” media like news articles and online publications. These include arguments like the Slippery Slope argument (“If we ban Hummers because they are bad for the environment eventually the government will ban all cars, so we should not ban Hummers.”), hasty generalizations (”even though it’s only the first day, I can tell this is going to be a boring course.”), begging the claim (”Filthy and polluting coal should be banned.”), and ad hominem attacks (”Green Peace’s strategies aren’t effective because they are all dirty, lazy hippies.”) among others. If you see a person using a logical fallacy to support their argument, it might be worth asking why they're resorting to that kind of tactic instead of letting the facts speak for themselves.

Lies, Damn Lies, and Statistics: Data Manipulation

It's also really important to understand how data and statistics can be manipulated in order to support a given claim.  We see this a lot in the news lately- both sides of a debate appear to have equally valid "facts" that totally contradict one another. This is usually because one side (or both sides) are manipulating the statistics to make them look like they support the claim that's being made, even when they really don't.

For example, people will use “relative risks” to make a problem look bigger than it actually is.  Saying that murders have doubled sounds like a huge problem, but it’s not really that big of an issue if the number of murders went from 1 to 2.  Similarly, people will use “only x number of people” or “over x number of people” to make a problem sound bigger or smaller, even if the reality is that it’s the same number of people.  This powerpoint from UCSD does a good job of illustrating some of the more common ways that data is manipulated to prove a point. 

Graphs and other visuals can also be manipulated to make a problem seem bigger or smaller than it actually is.  For example, this graph was shown in Congress to convince people to defund Planned Parenthood in the US:

The red arrow shows abortions increasing over time and cancer screenings and other preventative services decreasing over time.  This isn’t an outright lie, but the graph above is actually two graphs overlaid and hasn’t been corrected for scale.  When you correct for scale, it looks more like this:

Which is a way different takeaway than the first graph had. 

When talking about statistics, it’s also important to remember that correlation does not equal causation.  This is a logical fallacy like the ones we were talking about before. If you want to be fancy, it's called "post hoc ergo propter hoc". It just means that someone is assuming that if ‘A’ happened after 'B’ then 'B’ must have caused 'A.' 

For example, here’s a graph of people who died by falling out of their beds compared against the number of lawyers in Puerto Rico.  At first glance, it might seem like these two are related in some way, since the graphs line up (they’re correlated).  But obviously, people dying by falling out of their beds has no impact on the number of lawyers in Puerto Rico or vice versa.  There’s no causal relationship between the two of them.

Once you understand the ways that media can be manipulated, it becomes easier to think critically about what you’re reading, hearing, or seeing. 

Some Questions To Ask Yourself

When you interact with something new, there are a few questions you should ask yourself in addition to keeping your eyes open for logical fallacies and data manipulation. 

Who is the author? What is their bias?

What is the publication? What is its bias?

What is the author's purpose for writing this article?

What is the author's point of view on this issue?

What is the author trying to convince me of?

What assumptions is the author making in this article? Try to challenge these claims in your own mind.

Be wary of articles that are using emotional words or manipulation in their headlines ("politician SLAMS innocent young girl for suggesting that families are important" or "Perverted teacher indoctrinates kindergarteners into CRT cult!"). Also be wary of articles that ask a question in the headline ("are teachers indoctrinating our children?" or "will playing video games give you cancer?"). The answer to any headline question is pretty much always "no".

If you can, look for other sources that corroborate what you’re reading (especially if it’s a social media post) and sources that challenge what you’re reading.  Getting a full picture of the issue is important in being able to critically interact with media even if you already know which side you think you agree with.  Try to consider alternative explanations for the issue and the larger context of what you’re reading about to prevent just taking the article at face value.

Lastly, it’s important to understand your own biases and how they might impact what you believe when interacting with new information.  Humans are prone to confirmation bias (interpreting new information as confirmation of our existing beliefs, or throwing out information that doesn’t mesh with our existing beliefs), and so it’s important to understand what your biases are in order to critically interact with new information.  The goal is to be open to new information but aware of all of the extraneous factors that complicate our relationship to media.  Many people see changing their mind as a weakness, but I see it as the ultimate strength.  How great is it that we can grow and change the more we learn?  How great is it that every day, we have the opportunity to be just a bit better than we were yesterday?  Being able to admit that we were wrong is important for emotional growth, and I wish more people were willing to do it.

[miss-dr-reid]

This is calm, and it's, Doctor #9

TW, there is some DV in here and a hospital visit.

As we pulled into the street where the icecream shop is, I saw someone I recognised and my stomach churned. It was my ex. I hadn't told anyone at work about him, yet.

"What's up?" Derek asked. I didn't even realise I had gone stuff until I breathed, glancing at Derek quickly.

"My ex.. he's over there with a mate..." I said quietly, looking in the direction of the one person I hoped to never see again.

"We don't have to get icecream of you don't want." He reassured, placing his hand on my upper arm, rubbing lightly with his thumb.

"No- um- actually... I have a plan. I'll need you guys to help though, if that's okay?" I devised a plan with the boys after finding a park. They both willingly agreed, eager to help out a friend with some pretty revenge.

I got out of the cat and headed to the icecream shop, where my ex was, sitting at a table outside of it. As I got closer, he made a comment, just as I expected.

"Damn, Y/N, you want me back that bad you followed me all the way out here?" Cain retorted, tapping his mate on the arm.

"Well no, actually. Last I heard of you was from the girl you cheated on me with. She told me you kept yelling my name while you guys did the dirty in OUR bed." I clapped back. I whipped my hair behind my shoulders, signalling the boys, I knew what I said would run Cain the wrong way.

He pushed himself up, to get out of his chair when Derek's hand pressed him back down by his shoulder, Spencer's arm draping over one of my shoulders.

"Is there a problem here?" Derek said, staring straight in to Cain's eyes, his mate shifting uncomfortable in his seat.

Cain was not a big guy by any means, bigger than me, but tiny next to Derek.

"Who are you, her boyfriend?" Cain demanded, basically a spitting in Derek's face.

"I'm more to her then you'll ever be. If you cause her any more trouble, I'll make you regret everything you've ever done to her. I can promise you that." Derek's voice stern and low, his grip tightening slightly on Cain's shoulder.

Seeing Cain so uncomfortable was quite pleasing. He didn't say anything, Derek squeezed his shoulder one last time before nodding, releasing him and walking over to us, linking elbows with me. We walked inside the shop and everyone let go. I thanked both of the guys and insisted on paying for icecream, as a thanks for helping me out.

They insisted it was no big deal, defending their family is what they do. I loved hearing that o was becoming part of the B.A.U family.

I ordered the icecream, paid and we each connected our own and headed back toward the car. We sat on the curb, eating our delicious desserts. We didn't say much, just sat and ate. I felt so small sitting between these two guys. I was so happy to just be there with them.

Suddenly, I was going face first into my icecream, which was splattered all over the side of my car as a sudden jolt came through my back. I didn't realise what had happened. I could hear Derek yelling as hands supported my head while I laid back. Spencer's voice filled my ears as everything went dark.

I woke up, rocking slightly. I monitor beeping and people talking. I tried to open my eyes, but my eyelids were so heavy, they felt glued. My hand felt funny, I tried moving it and discovered that it was encased by another hand. I squeezed as hard as I could.

"Y/N!" Spencer's voice filled my ears once again. I managed to half open my eyes, softly smiling up at him. "We're on the way to the hospital. Your ex kicked you while we were eating icecream and Derek chased after him." His voice soft and full of concern.

'Now I owe them double, of not triple for the shit they've dealt with today' I thought to myself, forever grateful that these two are in my life.

We arrived at the hospital not long later. Spencer wasn't allowed in for the x-ray, so he was left in the waiting room. After the x-ray was done, I was moved to a room. After a few minutes, a doctor came in, Spencer in toe, who stood next to the doctor, listening to his every word.

"You'll need to be careful with your nose over the next week, it's broken. Otherwise, your head and spine are fine and you'll be able to go after you've been patched up and kept for observation." He removed the c-collar from my neck and sat the bed up, "A nurse will be in soon to fix your nose." And with that, he left.

Spencer sat in the chair next to the bed and handed me his phone with the camera open.

I took it and looked at myself. I was a mess. There was crusted blood staining under my nose, around my nostrils and mouth.

"This is going to look so bad tomorrow." I said quietly to myself. Even though there wasn't much of a bruise right now, the second day is always worse. Spencer sighed at my comment as I say there still checking myself out. The phone started vibrating, Derek's name popping up on the screen.

"You're on speaker, Mr. Hero." I said to the phone.

"Hey buddy, it's good to hear your voice," he started, "I'll be there in a minute. Just finished giving my statement to the police. I'm see you soon. Also, I told the rest of the team and they're also coming. See you soon, kiddo." He hung up.

The doctor came back with a nurse. Spencer was allowed to stay for the packing and fixing of my nose. The laid the bed back, Spencer on one side of me, the doctor in front of him and the nurse on the other side. Being laid out in front of people touching me made me feel so uneasy, I didn't realise I was tense until Spencer placed his hand on my shoulder.

"Stay as still as you can, this will be quite uncomfortable." The doctor mentioned, and the nurse picked up some gauze off the tray they'd brought in. I grabbed Spencer's hand off my shoulder and held it in mine. I closed my eyes and breathed out through my nose as one set of fingers pressed on the bridge of my nose while gauze was being stuffed up my nostrils. The nurse finished up and I breathed out deeply, I had become so tense while being under her hands that my whole body had basically seized. They sat up the bed and left, going to organise my discharge papers.

Almost as soon as they had left, the whole teamed walked in. Everyone had looks of concern on their faces, giving my sympathetic smiles. Spencer stood up and moved away as Garcia was making her way over to me.

"You gave us a scare, chook." She said, pulling me into a hug. JJ came down the other side of the bed and pulled me into a hug once Garcia had let go. She offered me a wet wipe, which I graciously accepted. I carefully wiped the bottom of my nose and around my lips, trying to remember where the blood had crusted on my face.

"As much good as they do, it wouldn't hurt to clean up a little bit..." She commented, seeing the stained blood on various parts of my face.

"Glad to see you're alright." Emily called from her spot between Hotch and Derek.

I thanked everyone and tried out my most convincing smile, which only got sympathy smiles in return.

"You wouldn't be okay if Pretty Boy was there. He caught your head before you fell back onto the concrete." Derek commended, gesturing at Spence, who's face started glowing red. I mustered up the best thanks I could for him, I was genuinely grateful. "Although, someone had to chase the bad guy...." Derek continued, detailing about what happened.

He told us that I was kicked in the back of the head, my icecream being thrown onto the side of my car, with my face following - thinking back, I remember the crunch my nose made when my face slammed into the side of my car.

HE told us that he immediately dropped his own icecream to jump up and start chasing the guy who had decided to leg it (not surprised). He chased the guy into an alley, yelling at him to stop.

'Stop! FBI!' he had shouted. The guy had managed to get himself cornered and stupidly turned to Derek and tried to fight him. Derek recognised the guy as Cain. As a punch was thrown, Derek dodged, grabbed Cain and pushed him to the ground, holding him there until police arrived.

Hearing the story, I was surprised to hear Cain didn't pull a knife out, it was his go-to weapon of choice. I was happy to hear he was finally arrested. After some more questions, Hotch went home to be with Jack.

The doctor came back with the papers and I was allowed to go. Even though I insisted that I was fine to drive, no one was letting that happen. I also had to have someone stay with me for the night, to make sure everything was alright, apparently. JJ couldn't, she had her family. Derek insisted he was busy with 'things'. Garcia had to get back to Kevin, Emily to Sergio, which left Spencer. It was agreed that he would drive me home in my car, and we had to take Derek back to his car on our way.

~

I felt weird climbing into the passenger seat of my own car. It was nighttime and it made me wonder,

"How long was I out for?" I quizzed, really wanting to know.

"If I had to guess, I'd say like ten minutes." Derek guessed.

"More like twelve minutes and thirty-seven seconds. I was timing to the paramedics." Spencer's voice matter-of-fact. I thanked him for being there for and with me the whole time, and both of them for dealing with everything today.

"I just don't understand how you could let anyone treat you that way, let alone date it." Spencer scoffed, "I've seen the scars you've got, I'm guessing aren't from 'accidents', they show when you're vulnerable, which isn't your fault at all, it actually shows just how trusting you are, which is great, but obviously can get you into trouble if you're not careful. What I'm trying to say is, vulnerabilities need to be taken care of, trust needs to be earned and time heals all wounds." he finished.

"Love also heals" Derek added.

I had tears stinging the corners of my eyes, Trying to escape.

Spencer pulled in to the car park of the Cafe we had been at earlier that day and pulled up in the spot next to Derek's car.

Derek got out and stood next to my door, I rolled my window down. He caressed the back of my head and guided it towards him, leaning over to kiss the top of my head.

"Take care of yourself." His head lifted to look at Spence, "And each other." he finished before turning to get into his own car, leaving to go home.

Spencer didn't move, he just sat in silence.

"What's wrong?" I asked, tilting my head to the side.

"I don't know where you live." He said, giving me puppy dog eyes.

With a giggle, I directed him towards my place. He stopped in front of his place on the way so he could grab a few things, ready to spend the night at mine. He insisted that I go in with him, because he's 'not allowed' to leave me alone.

"Doctors orders. That's me, I'm the doctor." He laughed at me, finding himself amusing.

"Well, I'm also a doctor, doctor, and I said no such thing. But if you insist, I'll come in with you." I said climbing out of the car, he followed and we went inside up to his place.

We walked in to his apartment and I sat on a stool at the bench, so I didn't get comfy.

Spencer wandered off to his room to pack. I pulled out my phone to see some missed calls and a few messages from a number I didn't recognise. I unlocked my phone and opened the messages from the unknown number.

'ur gonna pay 4 wot u did to Cain' Read the first one.

'u dum bitch' read another, the next few that followed were along the same lines.

When Spencer came out, I showed him the messages, not because I was scared, but because I didn't want to keep secrets. It's also probably a good idea to have as many people as possible know, in case anything were to happen. He sighed, reading the messages. He cupped my face with both hands and looked my in the eyes.

"Y/N, nothing is going to happen to you. Even if we have to have someone with you all day and all night. We, the team, will keep you safe - I'll do it by myself if I have to." he pulled my head against his chest and cuddled me, seeing the tears which had started pooling in my eyes. I let the tears come out, my body was gently shaking as I quietly sobbed into Spencer's chest, "You're okay. You're safe with us."

I cried, thanking him, wrapping my arms around his waste. He rubbed my back for a bit before placing his hands on my shoulder, pulling back a bit. His hands were firm, but gentle, he came down to my eye level. His eyes were so warm and welcoming, I admired all of his face while he was there.

He suggested leaving, and his hands trailed down my arms, to my hands. He took my hand in his and I hopped off the stool, following his footsteps to the door.

Not much was said on the car ride to my place. I didn't bother with the radio, only looking out the window, watching everything pass by, giving directions when necessary.

We finally arrived. I have a stand-alone house, on the outskirts of town. Spencer pulled into the driveway and got out. He rushed around to my door and opened it, just as I had started to. He helped me out and draped his arm around my shoulder as we headed inside.

OMG guys, I am so bad at keeping updated

[nymphigeon]

Party Regret

◇ Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

◇ Genre: Fluff, implied smut/light smut

◇ Rating: NC-17

◇ Words: 1.2k

◇ Warnings: Mentions of sex, mentions of  cunnilingus, kissing, nothing too heavy

◇ Summary: Parties definitely aren’t your thing, though somehow you still end up at one.

◇ A/N: Wow, it’s been a hot minute since I uploaded anything.

Everyone seems happy, carefree. The softly booming music leaving the speakers isn't able to cover up the loud laughter and drunken chatter of those enjoying themselves. Now and then screams followed by a splash interrupt the ongoing conversations. Nobody really cares, they're having fun.

There's not a massive amount of people outside, just those who don't mind getting wet. The rest is getting it on inside, grinding against a stranger they've never met before or trying to forget tonight all together. Alcohol can work wonders on your memory.

Tomorrow crying girlfriends will litter the campus, just to be completely fine the day after. "He apologized, it won't happen anymore!" Playing is fun, except when it's with hearts.

It's so easy to forgive, harder to erase.

The garden is big, complete with a grass field and a pool off to the left. I'm somewhere completely on the other side, seated on a pile of flat stones forming a decorative wall, watching bouncing breasts and rock hard chests joined together.

Covering up isn't something they know, the racy swimsuits being just enough to avoid a nip slip with hard practice. Not that the boys would care, they're searching for it.

I'm not having fun. Or actually scratch that, I hate it here. It's sticky, too loud and the place reeks of std's. I came because I didn't want to disappoint. That's all.

I shouldn't have. There is no purpose in my presence other than simply being the quiet girl who doesn't know how to have fun. I'm sorry I can't have fun showing my ass to every willing soul.

"Hey." The deep sound startles me, having been too occupied with the screen of my phone. It's comical really, how easily my body relaxes at his voice. This isn't for me.

"Hey." I respond, barely being audible over the background noise. The phone in my hand finds it's place back into where I originally took in from half an hour ago when he sits next to me. I don't want to be rude.

"What are you doing all the way out here? Not having fun?"

His gaze contains a hint of worry and two tablespoons of guilt. For what I don't know. The uncertainty creeping up makes me uneasy. It's okay.

"It's just not really my place to be, I'm sorry." There is a slight attempt at making him feel better. It doesn't work how I want it to.

"Whoever dragged you here must be an idiot then."

He smiles, but it's more the sad kind than anything else. Before I realize it myself, I blurt out the opposite. Muscle memory.

"Actually, I'm very fond of them. You're hurting my feelings." My fingers itch to reach out, still they won't leave their place on my thigh.

"Must be a good friend."

"Boyfriend."

This time the chuckle he releases does contain a dash of amusement. Afterwards he is quick to correct himself. "Boyfriend."

"He asked and I willingly complied thinking it might be different this time." There is no reason to explain myself, or maybe I want him to understand me. He never asked. It’s clear he wanted to know.

"It is not?"

"It is not."

He is careful, studying my face for any rejection towards his following actions as he raises one of his hands. The movement ends with him gently patting me on the head, complete with making a mess of my hair.

"You must be really into that guy for you to go along so easily." Whether that's a sarcastic comment or just a fun joke beats me. Nonetheless, it stirs up a funny feeling deep inside my gut.

"I am." I'm bashful, shyly looking down at the ground my feet rest upon as to not meet his eyes. Perhaps I wasn't supposed to be so serious.

"When you get home, remind this dude of yours to go down on you. Gotta make it up to you somehow." For just a moment my eyes widen, not expecting the bold statement. My thighs rub together at the idea, obviously enjoying the thought.

"I'm not against it."

"Good."

After that it's silent. Neither of us leave our place on the rocks, happily watching the party goers slowly drizzle back inside as the temperature drops. Somewhere along the way, the hands resting next to each other intertwine.

Neither of us talk about it. Suddenly this place isn’t so bad anymore.

It's not until a good few minutes later that the comfortable silence gets broken by him. An easy to understand command with a sense of urgency to it.

"Let me take you home." He stands up, pulling me with him through our conjoined hands. The action makes me stumble into his chest, briefly getting a feel of the muscles underneath the thin fabric of his shirt.

"I'm not one to sleep around." Though my actions contrast my words. I lean into him more trying to chase the warmth I only had a second to enjoy.

"You don't need to."

If it wasn't for the adoring smile on his face, maybe I would've convinced him to stay, reminding him of his friends still scattered around the place. I would've convinced him to let me find my own way home, not wanting to spoil his fun.

Instead, the glint in his eyes hypnotized me into silence, meekly letting him escort me to his car.

Only when the lock to our shared apartment clicks open do I speak up about it. "Shouldn't you have told the boys you were leaving?"

"Half of them were already too deep into some chick to care."

For some reason my brain decides to visualize the scene. I gag silently, which doesn't go unnoticed by Jungkook. He snickers at my expression while sliding my coat off my arms with a soft touch.

"Forget about them. Focus on me." The words are spoken right above my lips, his breath mingling with mine. I can't help myself. My lips slam into his, meeting in a passionate kiss, contrasting to our usual rough ones.

"A little bird recommended you to go down on me." I manage to get out between kisses. His hands react immediately, squeezing the back of my thighs. It's not long before they slide to the front with the intended purpose of taking my shorts off.

"With pleasure."

He drops to his knees, popping open the single button on my shorts, though doesn't slide them down yet. The exposed skin of my legs get showered in kisses the moment he hits the floor. They start at my ankles, slowly making their way up to my double clothed core, before stopping completely.

Just as I open my mouth to complain he slides off both my shorts and panties in one swift motion. Not even giving me time to step out of them, two of his fingers find the wetness between my legs, stroking up and down.

"Hm? You're incredibly excited for how little I've touched you." It's not hard to notice how he wants his ego boosted, and I'm not one to deny.

"Have been since you mentioned it at the party, tease."

The smirk he wears only widens at that, happy with the confession. "Then I better make it worth the wait, right darling?"

Let's just say he definitely did not disappoint that night.

[yurtletheturtlehenderson]

Near-Death Experience || Mike Wheeler x Reader

Requested: "Billy enters the house in season two and is beating up Steve and the reader steps in to help and Billy ends up hurting her. so after Max stabs Billy in the neck, they're in the car and the reader is seated between Mike and Dustin while Max is driving and Mike ends up getting a little angry at the reader for risking her life to save Steve? He was so worried Billy would kill her which is why he's angry and the reader was defending herself and saying he would have killed Steve and stuff then when the car turns and stuff, the reader and Mike end up falling on each other as they're arguing sksk"

Warnings: several mentions of blood, graphic (?) descriptions of violence. Broken bones.

"I said, does anybody understand that?" You looked at Steve in disbelief as he scolded the five of you, waving a dish towel around. "I need a yes."

You guys were trying to convince him that you all could give El and the chief time to get to the gate if you drew out the demo-dogs by setting fire to the hub.

Honestly, the idea wasn't half bad.

But of course, Steve wasn't having any of it.

You rolled your eyes dramatically and groaned.

"Whatever, mom!"

His face scrunched up at your remark but before anything else could be said, everyone's attention was pulled outside when you heard the obnoxious revving of an engine.

Your legs carried you into the living room and Max ran to the window. She jumped onto the couch and peered out into the night, Lucas joined her. You could see faint white lights, from what you could only assume to be headlights, crawl across their faces.

"What is it?" You asked.

"It's my brother." Max said, and you could sense the panic sneaking up on her. "He can't know I'm here. He'll kill me. He'll kill us."

She looked desperately around the room and your face hardened in worry. You looked from Max to Steve, hoping he would know what to do.

Steve wore a similar expression on his face, but then he stormed outside.

The rest of you all squeezed onto the couch together, peering outside to watch everything unfold. You had to squint a little, but then you saw a guy step out of the car, around Steve's age you guessed, and Steve joined him on the lawn.

None of you could make out what they were saying but based on context and their body language, you could tell the air out there was thick with tension.

Lots of words were exchanged, and just as you had wished you could hear what they were saying, Max's brother Billy looked over at the window, at all of you and gestured.

You all dove under the window, hiding behind the couch, panting.

"Shit!" Dustin exclaimed. "Did he see us?"

There was beat or silence and then you could have sworn you heard a thud and groaning, followed by the sound of heavy footsteps growing closer.

"I think he saw us," Dustin panted.

"No, shit Sherlock!" You hissed, and you suddenly got an idea. "The back door in the kitchen. Quick!"

You guys all abandoned the couch and make your way to the kitchen, hoping you could make it out in time but then the door burst open and you all turned to see Billy.

This was the first time you actually saw him in person and he immediately creeped you out.

He stood in the doorway, and he looked at all of you. His eyes landed on Lucas and they zeroed in on him.

"Well, well, well," he said flatly, though he was seeping with rage.

He stalked forward and we all subconsciously backed away.

"Lucas Sinclair," he growled. "what a surprise,"

He now stood in front of Max and Lucas and his attention turned to Max.

"I thought I told you to stay away from him, Max."

"Billy, go away." Despite her words, her tone gave how frightened she really was, not that you blamed her.

"You disobeyed me," he said and you cringe in disgust. "And you know what happens when you disobey me,"

"Billy," her voice wavered but he continued.

"I break things,"

Everything happened so fast. He turned on his heel and grabbed Lucas by the shoulders, and forced him across the room and into one of the shelves.

You and your friends cried out frightened protests.

"Get off me, you--" Lucas struggled against his grip but Billy was too strong.

Billy shook Lucas by the collar roughly, forcing Lucas to look him in the eye. You stood frozen, telling, no screaming at your body to move and help your friend but your limbs were numb and you watched tearfully in fear.

"Since Maxine won't listen to me, maybe you will. You stay away from her." He shook him violently once more, raising his voice. "Stay away from her! You hear me?"

Before you know it, your legs were carrying you across the room, you grabbed at his shoulder trying to pry Billy off of him but he didn't even have to turn around to stop you.

He shoved his arm back roughly and suddenly, his elbow struck you sharply and it knocked you back, taking the wind out of you, and you heard Mike call out your name in fear.

You stumbled back and caught a glimpse of Billy shuffle backward, and doubling over, reaching between his legs. Lucas must have injured him, going right where it counted.

He looked up, glaring holes into Lucas.

"You are so dead, Sinclair! You're dead."

You felt someone push past you and you exhaled in relief. It was Steve.

Steve put a hand on Billy, roughly turning him around to face him while simultaneously getting him away from Lucas.

"No," he said simply. "You are."

Steve reeled his hand back and punched Billy square in the jaw, knocking him back.

You and Duston chuckled happily, in relief, but Max only grew more grave.

"Steve!" She called out warningly.

Billy stood up, cackling maniacally, turning to look at Steve.

Lucas slipped quietly behind him and you reached out and grabbed his hand. He gladly accepted and you pulled him into a quick hug as you led him back to the others. You stood in front of them like a shield. Your eyes never left the fight, making sure Billy didn't come after Lucas or Max.

Billy smiled smugly, still laughing as he talked down to Steve.

"Looks like you got some fire in you after all, huh?" Billy was yelling, and he gestured to Steve. "I've been waiting to meet this King Steve everybody's been telling me so much about."

He strutted over to Steve, getting in his face, blood was dripping from his nose. While he wore a smile, his eyes were dead and expressionless. It was enough to scare you senseless.

Steve seemed equally disgusted and he spoke in a much quieter tone. He gently pushed Billy away, using only his forefinger and Billy shuffled back, gears in his head turning. He was planning his next move.

"Get out."

He stood rooted to the spot, and he licked his lips. Suddenly his arm was flying through the air, headed right for Steve's temple. He didn't even have to reel back.

But Steve caught on and ducked just before the boys fist could collide into his head. He stood quickly and swung his left fist, hitting Billy in the side of his face.

Billy stumbled back into the kitchen table and looked up Steve, still laughing.

Mike and Dustin came alive from behind you.

"Yes! Kick his ass, Steve!"

"Get him!"

Before Billy could strike again, or even pull himself up from the table Steve swung again, knocking him back into the kitchen counters.

"Murder the son of a bitch!"

Steve was still advancing. Throwing punches left and right.

"Now! Now!"

"Get that shithead!"

"Kill the son of a bitch!"

Billy was now against the kitchen sink, head now rolling back with laughter, blood dripping from his face on his exposed chest.

All too late you saw Billy reach for the plate and he crashed it into Steve's head knocking the wind out of him.

"Steve!"

"Billy!" Max yelled, pleading for him to stop.

It was Steve who was now tumbling back into the kitchen table.

"Holy shit!" Mike breathed out.

Steve was stumbling in your direction, his back to Billy and you saw Billy advancing on him.

"Steve, look out!" You cried out.

He lunged himself into the wall, narrowly missing Billy's fist. He collided into the shelves and then pushed himself off, missing another one of Billy's attacks.

Steve made his way into the living room and you shuffled your friends to the side, getting out of the way of the fight. Billy trailed after Steve and grabbed him by the shoulders roughly.

"No one, tells me what to do!" With a loud grunt, he headbutted Steve in the face.

Steve collapses on the floor and you shuffle on your feet, your mouth hanging open and you silently prayed that he would get up.

Billy hollers in triumph and stalks towards Steve curled up on the floor. The map of tunnels that were taped to the floor, the ones Will had drawn, were crumpling and tearing under Steve's body as he pushed himself away.

"Get up!" Billy spit.

"Come on, Steve!" You cried.

"You're gonna kill him!" Dustin exclaimed.

Billy stands over Steve, one leg on either side of him and he throws his arms back and pummels Steve into the ground. He throws punch after punch, strike after strike. Steve is bleeding out all over the floor. You watch in horror, knowing now Billy wasn't gonna stop until he went too far. Until Steve was dead.

He was screaming, spit flying everywhere as he did so. Some of the spit was mixed in with blood and you saw Steve losing consciousness.

Everything was in slow motion now. Your face hardened and you stomped noiselessly over to Billy, his back turned to you. You felt the ghost of a grasp on your arm, trying to stop you but your arm slipped out easily. It was Mike. You tuned out his cries of protest, he was soon joined by the others but you couldn't hear them now. All you could hear now as time seemed to stand still was the thunderous pounding of your heart in your ears.

You focused on Billy's form like a target. Like a bull storming after the matador, all you could focus on, all you could allow yourself to think about, was the red of his shirt.

You were running now and a deafening cry tore through your throat as you sped at the man. Arms outstretched and you tackled him into the door, knocking him off his feet.

Everything went back to normal, you were back in reality and your friends shocked exclaims echoed in your ears but all you could focus on was the look on Billy's face.

Shock flickered over his features, but he quickly recovered. He chuckled dryly and muttered your death sentence under his breath.

You were too slow to dodge the sudden sweep of his leg, and you crashed onto the ground, hearing the paper crumple under your body.

You looked up at him in fear and you scrambled back desperately. But you didn't get very far, your hands scrambled for grip on the hardwood floor but you found next to none. The paper tunnels moved from under your sweaty palms, causing your hands and feet to slip continuously.

He now towered above you and you could barely make out the cries of protest from Mike and the others.

"Don't hurt her! You son of a bitch, DON'T YOU TOUCH HER!" It was Mike and his voice was cracking with fear.

You looked quickly to the side, hoping by some miracle Steve would jump to his feet and save you but he was out cold.

By the time you looked back at Billy all you saw was his fist. Your head, which had been previously craning up, was slammed into the ground.

You heard a crack and pain exploded in your nose and the back of your head, confusing you. What you hadn't registered yet was that when he had punched you, it sends your head into the floor so hard you could have sworn you felt your brain hit the back of your skull.

White filled your vision and your ears were ringing slightly. You were in too much pain to hear the cries of fear from your friends.

Your legs began moving, squirming every which way. Attempting to kick him, or to worm you out from under him you didn't know which one. But then you felt a heavy weight on your right leg. It still moves violently, trying to get out from under his giant rubber boot.

You then felt an enormous pressure on your shin before it stopped briefly. You were still recovering from the blow to the face and head, you couldn't move much anymore you panted. Forcing your head to turn. It rolled on the ground as it moved, though it felt like it weighed a hundred pounds. All you could do was watch and you saw him bring his left leg up. He looked you right in the eye, teeth clenched as he through his foot down onto your shin. Just as your ears stopped ringing you heard a crack and you cried out in pain.

He applied pressure on your leg with his foot and twisted into your leg, smashing his foot into the wound like you would a bug you just squashed, making sure the thing was dead.

You cried out in pain and terror, begging him to stop but he kneeled down closer to you as he flared at you.

You whimpered on the ground, reaching your forearms up in the form of an 'x' to shield your face, your arms felt like lead but it made no difference. He grabbed both your wrists in one hand, taking down your arms with no effort at all. With his other hand, he grabbed your hair close to your scalp and pulled your head up before slamming it into the ground.

The world was quiet and your vision grew dark. The last thing you saw was Max storming after Billy, syringe in hand.

×××

The next thing you feel is your body swaying slightly back and forth.

You were moving but your eyes were still closed. You heard the roar of an engine and your senses prickled at the familiar sound.

Everything came back in bits and pieces.

You remember hearing that sound when he showed up. You remembered running. You remember feeling fear. Lucas. Lucas was in danger.

Then you recalled punches being thrown and Steve.

Most of all you remembered red. Blood?

Yes, there was blood, a lot of it but that wasn't it. There was something else.

Billy!

Your eyes shot open and although it was dark, your eyes still seemed to adjust to the light. You were in a car.

Squinting from the bright lights that flashed over your face. The lights you realized, were from the road. Headlights.

You tried moving your head and you caught a glimpse of Dustin to your right. He was icing someone. Steve.

Steve was still passed out.

Dustin looked up and saw you were awake. He smiled gently at you.

"Hey buddy," You frowned, your mouth parted slightly.

You then felt how cold and simultaneously hot your upper lip felt. Was your nose running? You tried licking your lips but you immediately tasted the familiar metallic taste on your tongue.

"Y/n!" The voice came from your left and you moved your head to face the familiar voice. As soon as you did you winced, hissing slightly at the intense throbbing of your head.

You had a horrible migraine.

"Mike?" You croaked.

You blinked several times but you saw him breathe a sigh of relief.

"Y/n, oh thank God." He held up three fingers and you squinted. "How many fingers?"

Your vision doubled briefly as you tried to focus but it returned to normal just as soon.

"Three," you mumbled. "W-What happened?"

"You got the shit beaten out of you." He answered, his tone turned stern and his voice began to rise. "What the hell were you thinking?"

As your ears began picking up more sounds around you, your senses coming back, you picked up on the sloshing coming from Mike's direction.

Your eyes fell on his feet and you saw a can of lighter fluid in his stashed between his feet.

"Whas' that?" You slurred.

"Are you even listening to me?" Your eyes trailed back up to Mike and you peered up at him.

"I said you could have gotten yourself killed!"

"Nobody was doing anything," you said.

But apparently you hadn't actually said anything out loud and he just stared at you, still waiting for an answer.

"Nobody was doing anything!" You cried. "Steve was getting killed!"

"You were getting killed!" Mike retorted but you weren't listening.

Where was Steve?

Forgetting about your throbbing head you whipped your head around to your other side and saw him passed out on the other side of Dustin.

Oh, yeah. You thought.

It seems you had also forgotten you just saw him when you woke up.

You had to keep your head still for a few moments, just to recover from moving your head too fast. Mike, as it turns out, was still lecturing you.

You slowly rolled your head against the back of the seat to face Mike once more.

"He's twice your size, he could have snapped your neck! Seriously, what the hell were you thinking?! Do you have any idea how worried I was?"

Your face scrunched up in a wince, and you groaned, reaching up to cover your ears.

He realized what he was doing and calmed down a bit.

"Sorry,"

"He wasn't stopping, Mike. He was gonna kill him." You managed. "Then he was gonna kill all of us."

Then something clicked in your head.

"Wait, wait, wait," you grew frantic and Mike had reached out to calm you.

"Who's driving?"

Before you could get an answer you looked up and saw a flash of red hair in the driver's seat and then two hands ripped the steering wheel to the side.

The car turned so suddenly and with such a force it rolled you over and you cried out. Unable to physically stop yourself - pain exploded in your leg as soon as it so much as shifted and the memory of your leg snapping came flooding back to you - and in a mad scramble to get your weight off your bad leg combined with the sudden shift of gravity you were rolled over onto something indistinguishable.

When gravity centered and the car adjusted you groaned from the pain, and you strained to crane your neck, wanting to know what you landed on.

More specifically, who you landed on.

You were now face to face with Mike, he was violently pink as he met your eye and quickly looked away. You could feel his breath on your face and yours was probably on his.

You had been bumped into by Dustin and completely flipped over onto Mike's lap. You were practically laying on him.

You both were immediately flustered but you were cut short by the pain. Everything had happened so fast the pain hadn't caught up to you until now. Your head, nose, and leg were throbbing and you winced harshly.

"Y/n," his voice came out in a whisper. "Here let me help."

He had abandoned his lecturing tone, his anger completely forgotten and he was now using a soothing tone. He half cradled you as he helped place you back on the seat.

You thanked him under your breath, your voice was weak and spared a glance up at him.

You were now positioned so you were leaning against him. His shoulder became a pillow but you didn't adjust anymore. You were still blushing and so was he, profusely in fact. And you opened your eyes, seeing a mischievous smile on Dustin's lips as he looked between you two.

Okay, now would be a good time to pass out again.

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Savannah

Jac: Cannot stop thinking about that one dress in that last boutique we checked out though... Jac: so lowkey mad at Isabelle for having to go home to walk her dog 🙄😩 Savannah: UGH I know! Don't get me started yet again on how her mum is literally never there to do anything for it & they don't even have a garden Savannah: I'll go back & get it for you, she can't stop me Savannah: I have less than zero reasons to hurry home Jac: Lowkey like, who do I call again? 😬 Jac: the poor thing, as if breathing wasn't issue enough without having to contend with getting overweight and her mum's vape habit Jac: You're so pure 🥺🥺 Jac: and I'm personally not over seeing you in that one shade of pink like ??? Jac: 👼🏾 walking Savannah: ^^^  the levels of cruelty make my heart hurt, honestly 😢 but I won't get to Heaven until I convince them to see the error of their ways & that is a battle I simply do not have the energy for today Savannah: you could literally wear that AWFUL dress that Isabelle was considering- thank god we talked her out of that much! 🙌🏾- & still look like an actual goddess Jac: Seriously, I don't know how they can live with themselves Jac: that would be their business, because I'm not as caring as you, or even close, but the fact it hurts you means it's mine too 😤 Jac: actually though, would have had to pretend to not know her, oh my God Jac: not to mention how short it was, as well as just hideous...like this is a SCHOOL event, girl, I... 🤦 Jac: it does mean we're scheduled to help her keep looking though Jac: which is becoming a trial, like I'm so sorry to say but wow Savannah: I likewise don't have the necessary reserves to try and teach her the difference between positive & negative attention Savannah: Can Amelia not help her look? I highly doubt her wardrobe is fully stocked with suitable school event dresses so surely she still needs to keep looking too? Jac: That's a whole conversation her mother should be having with her but also needs Jac: sad, really Jac: Poor, poor Is Jac: Meels is a committed outfit repeater, no matter the occasion Savannah: She can't wear jeans to this though Jac: 🙄 I've also tried on that subject Jac: it'll just become a whole THING Jac: us trying to sort both of them out and getting nowhere with our own looks Savannah: 😔 I'm exhausted by their indecision, it's taking the excitement out of it Savannah: I understand that they can't and don't feel themselves in just anything, but it's getting ridiculous Jac: ^^ Totally agree Jac: although us being on the same page is not anything like a surprise these days Jac: it's so unfair, really Jac: they're not even THAT bothered about the whole thing Jac: we've put effort in before this whole step even Savannah: I knew you'd understand, despite feeling like I'm the one who is being totally unfair by saying anything, the rational part of my mind which isn't on the verge of tears as a result of Is' complaints or Amelia's apathy is like no, Savannah, you're not wrong Savannah: it does matter to us & it's allowed to be viewed as important Savannah: not to mention enjoyable, god forbid Jac: You NEVER need to doubt yourself Jac: you're a complete empath, honestly, to your own detriment Jac: but that isn't your fault and people should try to give even a fraction of what you give them back Jac: so, for your wellbeing, I'm calling a time-out on this and them Jac: you've got to focus on you for once ❤ Savannah: I can't tell you how wholeheartedly I wish I was the person you think I am, Ty & I had a HUGE fight earlier & I've been plagued by self doubt ever since Jac: Oh no, okay, what was said? Savannah: He seemed to think that we had plans today, which is not a conversation I remember us having, so of course I wasn't going to cancel on you all Savannah: & that makes me the most thoughtless girlfriend he's ever had Savannah: I'm so sorry the girl you dated for like two weeks dropped everything without a second thought if you even hinted that you wanted her too because she didn't have a life Savannah: they broke up for that exact reason Jac: He's totally got the wrong day Jac: you don't double-book Jac: not dragging him, he's clearly just so busy with his own stuff too but yeah, no way Jac: he'll work it out and owe you a great apology Savannah: it was beyond upsetting, I swear I need a mental health break from everyone but you Jac: I get it Jac: no boy drama but my family are driving me INSANE right now Jac: I vote we go test 💅 colours and get a hand massage to boot Savannah: Can we? I don't want to be responsible for causing you more family drama Jac: Ugh, no, they're fine Jac: and you're more important than any of this drama, Is and Amelia's too Savannah: ^^ I don't care how hard Ty is sulking, I'm not going to leave you to cope with them on your own Savannah: you needed my help first Jac: Like, he can't put that on you Savannah: he's never spoken to me that way before & I have no idea where it came from Jac: Is he under a lot of pressure right now, on the team? Jac: or at home, school Jac: either way, the issue is not with you, and he probably knows that already Savannah: No, everything's going really well Jac: 🤔 Savannah: It's me, it has to be Jac: You've not done what he's saying you have Jac: accusing would be too strong a word but Jac: we'll work it out but I'm totally clueless right now Savannah: me too 😢 Jac: Lowkey mad at him now Savannah: I shouldn't have even said anything, I told myself that I wasn't going to Savannah: but then Isabelle & Amelia started sulking too & it brought it all back Jac: No, I want to be there for you Jac: and make you feel better Jac: which I definitely will Jac: but I just can't explain away why he's being like this 🥺😢 Jac: and I wish I could Savannah: You'll definitely make me cry, you're the best Savannah: he was acting as though I don't make time for him, which is not true, but if it were, the reason would be that nobody deserves as much of it as you Jac: making you cry doesn't sound like something the best would do Jac: you've got to have your own lives, own friends Jac: you do NOT wanna be THAT couple Savannah: if you don't want my tears because I couldn't be happier to have found the love of my life, I'll keep them in, since they are yours, it's totally fine Savannah: yes, exactly & he knows that, he has more friends than extra-curriculars & he has as many of those as I do Savannah: it doesn't make any sense Jac: I will treasure them Jac: and make sure they never, ever spill for anything less than the happiest of moments, because that is all you deserve Jac: I could talk to him...totally on the low and in the most well-intentioned way Jac: maybe it's something he doesn't want to burden you with? but he has accidentally burdened you with this doubt and worry instead Savannah: 🥰🤗 Savannah: you'd do that? Jac: Of course! Jac: You're my soul sister, so I hope Ty at least considers me a friend too at this point Jac: he's going to have to get used to having me around 😅 Savannah: if he doesn't we have a bigger problem than I thought because I love you so much Savannah: & I will run away with you if anyone ever tries to make me choose 😄 Jac: He's smart, he's not gonna do that Jac: though honestly, I could do with the break right now, would not say no Savannah: maybe we could have one, it's essentially my right as a child of a broken home to play my parents off against each other Savannah: & if my dad is foolish enough to believe he can buy back any of my love or respect after what he's done, why should I feel bad for treating him like one Savannah: I refuse to, I do need to focus on myself Jac: In terms of making-up-to-do, he's in the lead no question, or so far behind everyone else, looking at it that way Jac: I think it would be the most appropriate way to end transition year Jac: God knows if my parents would go for it 🙄 Savannah: I'll talk to them, I've never lost a debate so far & I couldn't be any more well intentioned, my heart is in the exact right place Jac: 👼🏾🥰 Jac: next year is when everything gets REAL Jac: we need the holiday we are NOT going to get until...I don't even want to think about the next time we'll be able to take a real break after this Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: whatever I have to do to make it happen & be perfect, so be it Jac: the salon is the EXACT right place to plan all this Jac: all the inane questions they ask about your holidays will actually be useful for once 🤭 Savannah: 😄 Jac: This is like, just a you and me thing, right? Savannah: of course Jac: Okay because helping Isabelle pick bikinis is the opposite of fun 😂 Savannah: oh my god, I don't even want to imagine Jac: if the dress breakdowns aren't bad enough Jac: we'd be so stressed we'd be put on the no-fly list, honestly Savannah: Amelia would probably throw my body into the sea, weighted down by rocks or Isabelle's dog, I swear she hates me Jac: How could anyone hate you? Jac: and she's friends with me, so her taste can't be THAT off Savannah: we won't mention that she's also friends with Is Savannah: any excuse to talk about how perfect you are instead Jac: I seriously think if we wouldn't, who would 😶 Jac: you'll make me 😳 Savannah: OH! The tans we'll both get Savannah: you'll be sightseeing & I'll just be staring at you in disbelief because you somehow got even more beautiful Jac: Oh please Jac: you're so stunning they'd be running to write new laws just to make it illegal how good you look Savannah: stop, nobody can see me 😳 but I still feel it Savannah: it should be illegal how you make me feel Jac: sorry, but a world where you don't know and aren't told how perfect you are is just not one I wanna live in 💁 Savannah: I don't deserve you, all I've done today is mope & wish your friends away so that I can have you all to myself Jac: We deserve each other Jac: if I didn't have you, who would I be able to get excited about this with? Jac: I'd be going on my own, most likely Savannah: okay, you're right Jac: I just get sad thinking about all the time we weren't friends and didn't know each other properly before Savannah: No, don't be sad, baby, we trust in the universe because it was meant to be now not then Savannah: lord knows I needed my glow up before I could be around you Savannah: 👼🏻✨🌞💛 Jac: That's true Jac: I'm more thankful that we have NOW and the promise of forever than I could ever be sad Jac: definitely not ignoring how blessed I am Jac: also blessed that my hair grew back in and I lost the puppy fat look 😬🤦 Savannah: I stand by what I said when I first saw the pictures Savannah: you were ADORABLE Jac: you're too sweet but I'm not gonna complain about it 🥰 Savannah: It's true & you know that because I would never jeopardise our connection Savannah: you're the only person I can talk to with total honesty, it's so important to me Jac: I only feel like myself with you Jac: no one else gets it all Savannah: I feel like a better person when I'm with you Savannah: but with none of the pressure that my parents put on me not to fail or the fear I have of letting Ty down Jac: You're the best person Jac: if all I do is give you the confidence to believe that, then that's totally worth it Savannah: You're going to achieve everything you want Jac: I can't wait to be Dr Taylor to your Dr Moore Savannah: 😊 Savannah: I'll be there to make sure every second of your life is worth it until then & of course after Jac: Naturally ❤ Jac: have you seen the groupchat? Savannah: please don't judge me for not having opened it Jac: I couldn't even when I'm just sat here like 🤨😑 Jac: Is has sent a million links and they seem to be getting worse every one I open ??? Savannah: Well I can't face that until later when I'm 🛀🏾🥂 Savannah: not that I'll be staying at Ty's unless he apologises to me Jac: You can always stay with me Savannah: I don't think any of your family would be fine about the always, but I wish I could Jac: They'll deal, I have to put up with all of them so 💁 Jac: I'm trying to persuade them to move the sofa bed from the hangout area to the music room, make it more of a spare room too, more privacy Jac: it's not fair that Jesse has a whole room with all his crap in, there's plenty of space in said hangout room for him Savannah: 😄 I'm sure we could win that debate too, I definitely have as much passion about the subject as you if it means I don't have to go home Savannah: it's impossible to 🛀🏾🥂 when my mum is mid-breakdown in her en-suite Jac: 😬😥 Jac: she needs to convert the passion she had for couples therapy for solo therapy now Savannah: Honestly! It's a full time job making sure she's adequately but not over medicated & if I'm worrying about it I know Sienna is Savannah: I have to unlock the door to let her in & before I know it I'm re-doing her braids or checking her homework, all the while my bath water is going cold Jac: You're actually such a good sister, and daughter Jac: In awe of you Jac: I wish you didn't have to work as hard as you do, but it's really admirable Savannah: like, so sorry that you had to go home to walk your dog, Isabelle 🙄 it's no wonder she doesn't understand me Jac: She doesn't even try Jac: she lives on planet Is where the most important thing is which bland boy she's going to get off with next Jac: I can't claim so many of your experiences and struggles but I respect the hell out of you, and try to make your life easier where and when I can Savannah: oh my god, the boy from the other night! I can't Jac: 🤢 Jac: her taste! Jac: worrying Jac: ugly dresses are the least of her problems Jac: I feel like I can't leave her alone sometimes, honestly Savannah: if this thing with Ty is leading to a break up I refuse to date any of the boys in our school Savannah: that would be another full time job working out which of them have & haven't done what with her & when Jac: tell me about it 🙄 Jac: they're all so lacklustre Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: we know our worth & we're simply too good for any of them unless they have a serious emotional glow up of their own Jac: Mhmm Jac: Ty is never gonna break up with you though Savannah: I don't know anymore, I never thought he would raise his voice to me Jac: That's pretty out of order Jac: he knows about your dad, what he's like Savannah: & it's really out of character too Jac: Yeah, totally Jac: men and anger issues are a whole can of worms Jac: there's something he isn't dealing with, for sure Savannah: or something he's not telling me Savannah: I just hope it's not a someone Jac: who could even come close to you? Jac: he's not that cliche of having the perfect girl and risking it on some skank Savannah: Logically I know that but I'm so scared Jac: Babe 🥺 Jac: you NEED to put you first, even just for the length of this nail appointment Jac: you don't need this extra stress from him Jac: I've started the convo, you can read it all once we get to the meat of it Savannah: I just want to be excited about 💅🏾 & all the iconic outfits we saw Savannah: it's SO unfair Jac: I hate this Jac: I wish I could take you away right now Savannah: you do, I'd be even more a wreck if you weren't the amazingly intuitive person you are, earlier without even having to be told I was upset you made me feel better over and over again Savannah: and right now you know what I need, way before I can put it into words or coherent thoughts Jac: we trust the connection too 💫💐💞 Savannah: I love you Savannah: I'm not devoting time & space to anyone else today, from this point on Jac: and we're definitely getting lunch after, my treat Savannah: no, mine Savannah: you've already been taking such good care of me Jac: Okay, but we will be going [place] and I will be getting you your favourite dessert Jac: no arguments 😘 Savannah: Okay, I won't fight you on it Jac: there are so many more important, and fun, decisions for us to make Savannah: ^^^!! Savannah: is Is still trying to force you to make outfit decisions for her though? Jac: I've said we've got more pressing matters right now Jac: I've made it sound like a me issue though, don't worry Jac: they'll have to cope without us for a while Savannah: Thank you, I can't cope with their relationship advice at the best of times Jac: Yeah, there's less than zero chance they'd have anything useful to say so Jac: they don't need to know Savannah: We won't tell them about the holiday plans either, that way you'll have a nice secret to keep as well as my stupid boyfriend drama Jac: to secrets 🥂 Savannah: 🥂 Savannah: Are you still thinking about that dress or have I ruined everything? Jac: You could never ruin anything with me Jac: so yes Jac: but I'm also remembering that other shop we didn't even get a chance to check out Savannah: their window display is INCREDIBLE ✨ Savannah: we should go Jac: I KNOW Jac: I've been window shopping every time I go past Jac: and to be fair, I think it's a bit out of Isabelle's price range, so it actually wouldn't be nice to take her there Savannah: the universe has spoken, I'm taking you there, our secret Jac: 🥰 Jac: I swear I only have fun when I'm with you Savannah: you're so much fun that nobody considers you might not be having any, but I promise I'll always think about you & what you need Jac: You'll make me cry now Savannah: Baby, no 🥺 if you start you'll set me off again Savannah: I'm a really ugly crier & you look like an 👼🏻 Jac: Okay, okay, no crying Jac: we'll stay flawless Savannah: that's harder work for me than it could ever be for you, but I'll do my best Jac: You're the most perfect person I've ever known Jac: inside and out Savannah: I feel that way about you, I'm not just saying it like, oh sure, me too Savannah: you're so perfect I should hate you Jac: Yeah, I know Jac: sorta been there done that Jac: not that I ever hated you really Savannah: I couldn't Jac: No, in the way how perfect you are SHOULD be impossible, that's how hating you felt Savannah: that's it exactly Savannah: & I just wanted you to notice me, I'd wait all day sometimes, getting more extra about everything Jac: It was like, I should've been mad at you but I could only ever be impressed Savannah: Well, I can't lie, I'm glad because I've never worked that hard for anyone before Savannah: it'd be super awkward if I failed Jac: 😅 Jac: I'm flattered Jac: how many boys wish, like Savannah: of course, but boys are easy Jac: duh, if you need to try then you've got bigger problems Savannah: I don't understand what Amelia's is, a smile & a hair flip & she could be dating anyone in our year Jac: Yeah, me either Jac: maybe she's had the same 💭 about Isabelle's seconds Savannah: 😄 Savannah: at this point I'm seriously expecting her to come out as asexual Jac: 🤔 maybe you're onto something Savannah: I do have good instincts for these things Jac: True Savannah: one of Sienna's friends is & nobody's been anything but really supportive about it Savannah: her year group are so sweet though Savannah: I was not like that a year ago Jac: Awh Jac: yeah, she knows we'd all support her Jac: and no one is going to say anything to her Jac: no one with half a brain cell anyway Savannah: & even if things were said it'd be no worse than what they say about her now Jac: Facts Jac: I don't know if she 1. genuinely doesn't hear 2. pretends not to or 3. seriously doesn't care Savannah: & you know her better than anyone so if you aren't sure she probably isn't either Jac: 😕 Jac: if she gave any indication, I'd do everything to help her Savannah: I know you would Savannah: I'm honestly so jealous of how close you two are & have been for like, ever Jac: but we're just as close now Savannah: I can't help but envy all the shared history you have though, all the pictures & stories that I'm obviously left out of Savannah: I shouldn't think like that, I know Savannah: but sometimes it does get to me, even though I try & be a better person than that Jac: We're going to make so many memories together though Jac: from now 'til forever Savannah: of course we are Savannah: it's no wonder he also accused me of being over sensitive, that one is very clearly true Jac: people just say that when they don't want to make allowances for other people's inconvenient feelings Jac: you can feel that, and I feel it too Jac: I wish you had been there Savannah: it just feels like she brings up all these past anecdotes as often as she does to try & leave me out Savannah: but maybe she doesn't realise how much it hurts me Jac: I'm sure she doesn't, but I'll make extra effort to clock it and get her to chill now Jac: we don't need to dwell on the past, especially at our age 🙄 Savannah: I don't want to cause friction, I can totally understand her wanting to reminisce, if we'd known each other then, I'd be the same Savannah: I talk & think about you literally all the time as it is Jac: Not even Jac: I don't want you feeling left out, or anyone Savannah: you would never Jac: you're so important to me Savannah: you've always let me know that Jac: 🥰 Savannah: I don't know how I would cope with anything that's going on in my life right now without you Savannah: I didn't even realise how badly I needed someone to talk to Jac: You look after everyone, you need someone to look after you Savannah: I can't rely on anyone to do that though Jac: me 🙋 Savannah: you can't leave me ever, I swear I'll go crazier than my mother Jac: I never will Jac: I promise Savannah: okay, I'm yours to look after then Jac: I can cope with that 😄 Savannah: you've definitely handled me at my worst, I haven't forgotten my bathroom breakdown, trust me Savannah: the embarrassment will last forever Jac: it so easily could have been me Jac: and maybe I wouldn't have had the courage to ever reach out if not, frame it like that Savannah: No, I hate that Jac: Okay, but no embarrassment either Jac: because you're the strongest person I know, and nothing I've learnt about you has changed that opinion Savannah: Well, I think you're the bravest & I fully believe you'll always find the courage to do whatever you want Jac: 🤞 Jac: I've got a lot of things I want and intend to do Savannah: 👏🏾 Yes girl! Savannah: I can't wait for transition year to be over Jac: Ugh, I know Jac: on the one hand, LOVE the extra opportunities and learning experiences they simply do not bother with the rest of the time Jac: but the other half is having to do lessons I have NO intention of carrying on with, which is just, pointless Savannah: ^^^^^^^^^ Savannah: my auntie was complaining at me as if it was OPTIONAL & I CHOSE it, excuse me Jac: Ha! 🙄 Jac: we all know it's meant to be in theory Jac: but if you don't go to a school with a high teacher to child ratio, with the budget and time to care about tailoring the learning experience to each child...then you're gonna have to do it with the rest, like it or lump it Savannah: She's a product of the American school system, there is zero place for her criticism Jac: and I- 😶 Jac: even our worst school would be preferable I'm sorry 😂 Savannah: Right?! Jac: Compared to the English and American systems, except maybe the super-elite English ones, I feel like we're still going to be at an advantage when we go to Uni Savannah: Agreed Savannah: even this year we've totally made the most of so far Jac: You've got to Jac: or you'll end up with a mediocre life and what is the point in even living Savannah: Ugh, exactly Savannah: I can already tell who is going to end up living like that Jac: I know right Jac: like, sorry to break it to you, but they're called FORMATIVE years for a reason Savannah: mhmmmm Jac: you can still have fun without ruining your life and future Jac: you just have to work hard too and some people are simply too lazy 💁 Savannah: ^^ we manage to have it all Savannah: I'm not sorry if they don't want it enough to secure it for themselves Jac: Exactly Jac: can't be sorry for you if you chose to act that way Jac: maybe some of them will turn it around years down the line but it'll be so much harder than if they'd put the work in when they were meant to Savannah: It breaks my heart that everybody doesn't have you to guide & hype them Jac: Only you deserve me though, that's the truth of it Savannah: I'm willing to work at that for the rest of my life too so Jac: 🥺 Jac: Ugh, I just love you Jac: you've really solidified all my life choices, if that makes sense Jac: like I know now everything I want is exactly what I need too Savannah: It makes perfect sense & I feel it too Jac: Thank God you do Savannah: My family are always pushing me to go to Trinity, they don't understand at all Jac: like, yeah, it's a good Uni, but we've done Dublin Jac: it's also the point of Uni to expand your horizons, put roots down somewhere else Jac: your hometown and Uni town are NOT meant to be the same Savannah: ^^ thank you Savannah: Sienna is the only one whose opinion is valid because I will be leaving her here alone for a year before she can go wherever she decides to & she'll actually miss me Savannah: my parents just want to control me Jac: Right, you aren't being selfish about it Jac: it's because you're too useful to them, like you said, looking after Sienna and your mum Jac: but those are actually both jobs your dad took on when he got married and made a family so Jac: he still has to deal with them Savannah: He gets to literally walk out but god forbid I take the next step in my life Jac: Right, he has to realize you are not a surrogate carer Jac: and that sorting those things out will always be his responsibility Savannah: He takes no responsibility for abandoning us never mind the fact that he spent years emotionally destroying my mum & then walking out when he didn't like who she became Jac: He's going to have to face his blame one day Jac: if nothing else, he does love you and Sienna, he wouldn't let anything really bad happen to you two Savannah: I don't feel loved, I feel like he decided none of us were good enough Savannah: maybe I'm too much like her for him to handle too Jac: I hate that he's made you feel like that Jac: but if anything, that shows failure on his part, not yours Jac: you're brilliant and loving and you're still there, even though it's so much for you to handle Jac: you don't need him, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't be held accountable right now, and that it's shit that he isn't stepping up Savannah: I hate him & I can't stand that he's made me carry hate in my heart when that isn't who I want to be Jac: Oh, Sav Jac: you wouldn't hold negative feelings towards him if he wasn't giving you that energy first Jac: you're never a doormat, again, it shows you're strong Savannah: Don't let me be with Ty, okay? Jac: Promise Savannah: Throw my phone into the 🛀🏾 if you have to, I'll forgive you Jac: 😅 I've got it in writing Savannah: 😄 Jac: would never drop it in 🥂 Jac: such a waste Savannah: Lord no, I need the full 🍾 Jac: 🙌 I can get behind that Jac: it's been a DAY Savannah: it had it's genuine 🙌🏾 moments nevertheless, because of & featuring you Savannah: I've looked at the pictures so many times, I CANNOT believe you really look like that Jac: 😳 says you Savannah: yes & I'm going to keep saying it until it sinks in for both of us that you're the most beautiful person that has ever existed because I'm hoping that if it does for me, at least, whatever dress you choose won't take my breath away as soon as I see you in it Savannah: otherwise you'll be trying to twirl but also having to catch me as I legitimately faint Jac: you'll have to not kill me before then or I won't be any use to anyone Jac: just a blushy mess on the floor Savannah: that isn't fair, on the one hand, you can't die, I need you, but on the other that sounds ADORABLE Jac: it's unfair how much of an 👼🏾 you are to me but I don't wanna share so Savannah: pink is one of my favourite colours, you know this & you wear it so well 🌺😳🌷 Jac: I'll wear it for you Jac: even if I don't go for that dress Jac: I wonder if we can get corsages or is that too extra 🤔 Savannah: I'll get that dress if it makes you happy, I'll wear anything you want me to, including a corsage Savannah: there is no such thing as too extra when you're talking about 🌷 🌹 🌺 🌸 🌼 🌻 Jac: my sentiments exactly 😄😄 Jac: I don't think Amelia will wear one Jac: but we can get them Jac: we can get our birth flowers and favourites and it'll be so cute Savannah: It should be an us thing, the holiday is so far away Jac: ^^ and it's more our vibe Jac: doesn't go with a short dress or jeans, really Savannah: 😄 Jac: I've got some books I need to return to the library, do you wanna meet at that little coffee place by there? Savannah: how many books? If you need help carrying them all I'll meet you at the library Jac: love the romcom fantasy 😅 Jac: you know me, there's a few... 😬 Savannah: 😊 I'll be right there, baby Savannah: no more struggles today Jac: ❤❤✨ Savannah: 🥰

[why-must-my-username-be-clever]

Hey, I'm not personally disabled but I did help both my parents through double joint replacements (One parent had both knees done and the other had both hips done) as well as a hyperextended knee one time.

Just, neither of them should have waited for a replacement. Part of it was financial and another part was pride. "I'm fine," my father would say, limping like 12 ft behind us. When he went to the doctor to finally see if he was qualified to get a replacement, the doctor said it was completely bone on bone at this point and they didn't know how he had been walking for the past two years.

My mom thought she could handle it, but after hyperextending her knee and seeing my dad actually *jogging* after surgery, she thought that she would see if she was qualified for a joint replacement. The doctor said her entire meniscus was gone and she probably should be in too much pain to walk.

In short it was at the point where my grandma recognized that my mom needed assistance and literally gave her a walker. This was years before she got the surgery, and it was still evident that she probably needed help walking. My mom was completely embarrassed, hid that thing in the closet as soon as we got home. Didn't take it out until recovering from surgery. Put it right back in the closet after the 2nd week out of the hospital (Thankfully she still used the cane).

For a while after each surgery, both of my parents were obviously at fall risk. So they had canes and walkers for a bit. My mom was extremely embarrassed and my dad just gave her his cane after finishing recovery. Oh, and my mom felt embarrassed or bad about using her 6 month handicapped parking pass. She'd go, "Oh, but someone with a hard time walking might need it more." To which, when I was in the car when this happened, I would promptly remind her, "You had two joint replacements in the last year. You have trouble walking." Also being stubborn with, "This hurts but I don't need to sit." The doctors literally told her to listen to her body, especially when it's in pain.

For about 6 months I had to basically convince my mom she needed the assistance she was getting because she was either too embarrassed or used to not getting help to recognize she needed it.

Now for the hyperextended knee bit. I'm not going to give the details about how it happened because she probably wouldn't want me to (I was there, I was scared) but I can tell you that the doctor said not to walk on it for a few days.

This was right before Synod Assembly, which for everyone who doesn't go to church or isn't involved with church events, is basically a two day long convention for an area of churches where they make important decisions as a group (i.e. Electing a new bishop. Not every year though).

So my mom had to go since she's our church's pastor, and it usually requires a lot of walking, so she was in a wheelchair the entire time. We had to ask at both the hotel and the convention center for a wheelchair. Both were manual, and it's way too much walking to just use your arms all day. So naturally I pushed her around and she hated it. She thought that since she didn't have a cast or a cane or any outward sign of being injured people would think she was faking.

We. Were. Surrounded. By. Pastors.

She knew most of them too. Every 5-10 ft I'd have to stop pushing because another concerned clergy member would walk up to us and go, "[Mom's name]! Oh my gosh what happens to you? Are you ok?" Like, all of these people constantly go on hospital visits for sick and injured people or are with someone who does. This is just the least likely place to be accused of faking and she was still afraid of that happening.

So this whole "some people might be faking" mentality is actually hurting people who need assistance and are too scared to ask for it.

If someone in a wheelchair or with a cane doesn't look like they're in pain, that's because one of the purposes of both is to make it not hurt to move around.

If someone gets up from a wheelchair and starts walking, they might be at fall risk or they've already walked too far that day, maybe they can only walk 20ft by themselves and you just happened to see them do 5ft without much trouble.

You can not tell a person's medical history or current injuries just by looking at them.

Heck, I have an incredibly high pain tolerance and walked on a broken foot for 7 hours before realizing it was broken (I was like 10 when that happened. A few years later I got whacked really hard with a tennis racket and didn't think to go to the nurse until 3 periods later when it was still visibly red and kinda swollen). Probably made that worse. If I couldn't tell it was broken by walking on it you shouldn't be able to tell if it's broken by watching me walk.

I'm not disabled, but there's no way I'm letting "I only judge people who don't need it" slide by after seeing both of my parents struggle and refuse help because they didn't "need" it.

Nope. Not going to fly.

yesterday at the mall i decided to borrow a “complimentary wheelchair”, because standing upright had become considerably hard, and if i wanted to keep up with my friends, i needed mobility. this post could become an essay about internalized ableism or a complaint about how the woman at customer service treated us, but then the post would be way too long, an i want to make a specific point.

once i got the wheelchair, i got into it, collapsed my cane, and began a combo of wheeling and scooting myself with my feet to the elevator, so we could go to the food court. the wheelchair was manual, and a shitty one at that, and i have horrible upper body strength, so this was how i could keep up.

my god, the amount of high and mighty people that stared at me as i made my way with my friends. i could practically see them staring intently at my legs, waiting for any sign that i was undeserving of a wheelchair. they would look at my legs, i would stare them in the eyes, they would meet my eyes, and bashfully look away. i began to get embarassed, and exclusively used my arms to wheel myself, not using my legs. so that judging people would not frown at my moving legs. this was painful, and i was painfully slow.

we eventually made it to the food court, and split up. (with a little help from my girlfriend, who, god bless her, wheeled me with my consent over to the burger joint.) i wheeled myself into line, and the amount of people who asked me, looking at my phone, if i needed help, was insane. no! i’m waiting for a burger! and then, inevitably, when i got my meal, no one at the counter was willing to help me assemble all of the things onto a tray to carry back to my friends. i slowly wheeled back to my friends, precariously balancing my burger and shake, while people stepped in front of me to ask if i needed help. no! just move! i got it!

eventually, we travelled back to the help desk to hand back in the wheelchair, and i began the cane walk of shame back to my car. people who had seen my scoot/wheel past, saw me with my cane and gave me dirty looks, and i could feel my cheeks heat up. it was embarrassing and infuriating. i wanted to yell at them and tell them all the gory details of my medical history. i was so mad. but i was in public with my friends, so i kept walking.

the only positive thing that happened, was when i got into the up elevator, a middle aged wheelchair user using the same technique as me in her custom chair scooted out of the elevator, and gave me a thumbs up as i got in, and smiled at me. thinking back on it, it makes me think about how the people who really get it, are the people who are living it. it sounds mean and alienating, but it’s true. i find talking to disabled people about these things so much better than talking to abled people, because i feel like i can be a person, rather than an encyclopedia.

if you read all the way through, thank you, and please give this a reblog.

[punkscowardschampions]

Ava & Buster

Ava: Are you lot en-route? Buster: 'Course Buster: But we've had one foot out the door for like half an hour, honestly Ava: Good, 'cos I have presents Buster: Yeah? Buster: Pot of gold or what, like Ava: Hardly appropriate for a two-year-old Ava: None for you, soz 💔 Buster: I'd argue it's very appropriate Buster: All the shit he needs haemorrhages cash Ava: You were warned Ava: Extensively Buster: And I ain't sorry I didn't listen Buster: They can all try and sue me Ava: Enter an arena where they aren't the experts? Ava: Doesn't sound like mum and dad Buster: No such arena exists, clearly Buster: Know it all, have done it all Ava: Your degree must be a waste of time then Buster: You'd have to ask 'em what they reckon Buster: But I'd wait til they've got a few more drinks down 'em first, get closer to the truth Ava: Ugh, shut up Ava: You know they're proud of you Buster: Yeah yeah, blah blah Buster: But are you proud of me? Real MVP and everything Ava: When you get your cap and gown Ava: Funny wig, even better Ava: I still only got stuff for the kids and Ri though Ava: I'll chase a 🌈 down ASAP Buster: You're alright Buster: Already got a girlfriend, don't you? Buster: No need to get gayer just to wind me up, Nance has got that covered Ava: Ha, don't even chat to me about annoying Buster: I won't Ava: 😏 Ava: No, you're meant to ask, idiot Ava: You're so lucky you only have a son Buster: Tell me then Buster: I want a girl next Ava: Well she's not coming back, not that I'm surprised Buster: What bullshit excuse did she go with this time? She's got too much work on, girlfriend drama or she just hates fam functions SO MUCH Ava: It was column A presented but 1000% came across as column C Ava: She can be so Buster: I know Buster: Did she try and buy you off with an NYC trip that ain't gonna happen just like the last one didn't? Ava: Twin telepathy is real, yeah? Ava: 🙄 Buster: Fuck that and her Buster: I told you before, when you actually wanna go I'll take you Buster: Then you only have to see her a bearable amount Ava: I know Ava: It'd be interesting to see how long she could hold a conversation with me but yeah Ava: won't happen so Buster: Longer than she can with me or dad, probably slightly less time than she can with mum, depending what mood they are both in Buster: That'd be my bet Buster: Chin up, the good twin is finally on his fucking way Ava: Sounds about right Ava: Good time to tell you to call her yourself later or do you want a drink before you process that? Buster: Bad time to be forced to remember that I told Rio right at the start I wouldn't drink when she couldn't Ava: Honestly, I thought this kid was PLANNED Ava: She couldn't Christmas or New Year either Buster: She was planned, just not by me Ava: 'Course, you would've factored in drinking Ava: Must be their gay agenda Buster: There's loads of shit I'd have factored in Ava: That's your upbringing talking Buster: Shut up Ava: It is though Ava: Personally, I agree its better than the more the merrier approach too Buster: You'll personally be waiting a load more years before you make me play uncle then, yeah? Buster: Good Ava: Ugh Ava: Don't be making me 🤢 just because green is the colour today Buster: Gotta Buster: Who the fuck is there to be jealous of when we're us? Ava: You couldn't go the more traditional routes, no? 🍾🥂 Ava: Seeing as I'm NOT pregnant or being a very supportive partner to someone who is Buster: Come on, who am I? Buster: And you can leave me out of your rites of passage, I've cleaned up enough sick in the name of being a supportive partner Buster: Grace'll hold your hair back for you Ava: There's no need to be old AND boring 😏 Buster: Fuck off Buster: Counting down the days til I can drink you under the table Ava: Dad lets me Buster: There's nothing dad won't let you do Buster: Got him well wrapped around your finger, like Ava: It's not my fault I'm the most lovable Ava: Do better 😋 Buster: That's the one title you can keep Buster: Got all the love I need, cheers Ava: 🤢🥰 Ava: N'awh Buster: Lyla didn't wanna come and hang with the extended fam then? Ava: Wouldn't do that to someone I liked, would I? Buster: Depends how much you like her Ava: Nah Ava: That's all a bit heavy Buster: Well yeah Buster: It would be a trial by fire Ava: Then pissed on Ava: then set on fire again Ava: I like having time away when I come here, you know Ava: Not attached at the hip Buster: I know Ava: I'll send her a hilarious postcard or something Buster: You sounded like Nance there Buster: No need to miss her at all Ava: Fuck off Buster: You're right she'd never write it Buster: Half her holiday would be over before she got the words down Ava: 😂 Ava: Rude Buster: It's fuck all I wouldn't say to her face if she ever bothered to show it Ava: Can no one in this family be nice Ava: Honestly Buster: Come on Buster: I'm nice to you Buster: You ain't even bought me a present Ava: I know, I'm very lovable Ava: Have you got me one? Buster: Yeah but you ain't having it now Ava: Yeah right Ava: I know who gets last word in your house Ava: and Rio is nice to everyone Buster: She's nicest to me and she always does what I say Buster: So you might wanna think again Ava: That's entirely too much information, thank you Ava: you owe me double as compensation Buster: You ain't having two bottles Buster: Keep the first one down and then we'll talk Ava: Challenge accepted Buster: Good Buster: Don't really wanna have to disown you before the day's out Ava: Least there's enough of 'em to fall back on should you get the urge Ava: I'll survive Buster: Keep that quiet around mum, it's still them and us with her Ava: Sounds familiar 🙄 Buster: You're bound to hear it yet again by the time she's had a few Ava: Not if I have anything to do with it Buster: Sounds like you've got a plan Ava: As planned as a party should ever be Buster: Yeah Ava: 💃🎉 Ava: Hurry up Buster: Traffic's worse than London at its finest right now Buster: Everyone on the road's either already wasted or angry they ain't Ava: Stay safe Buster: 'Course Buster: Speaking of, where you staying tonight? Ava: Tipsy childcare is better than no childcare Ava: No need to beg Buster: Shut up, I'll drive you is all I'm saying Ava: Cheers 💙 Buster: I'll cash the IOU when you're sober, like Ava: Better cash it before I cash my 2nd present then Buster: Forget it for now, it's a holiday Ava: That's what I've been saying Buster: You ain't gotta tell me, even if today I can't play as hard as I work Buster: Still not a fucking amateur Ava: Still a McKenna Buster: First and best Ava: Hardly Buster: If we're going by mum's them and us viewpoint, there's hardly any competition Buster: Just you and me, kid Ava: Well I'm just saying, Granddad is gonna be fuming Buster: Everything you learned about wrapping dad round your little finger you got from watching me with him Buster: I ain't worried Ava: Pfft Ava: My baby blues are bluer and my pout is poutier Ava: I'm the new model, boy Buster: 'Cause you need 'em to fall back on Buster: I'm just that good Buster: you're the youngest model that's all Buster: Due a spectacular fuck up about now Ava: You wish Ava: On all counts Buster: Nah, I'm rooting for you Buster: 'Course I am Ava: Mhmm Ava: Dead convincing 😏 Buster: I always am Buster: Wig or no wig Ava: So soppy, you Ava: Have title of my best big brother Buster: That's a copout but whatever Ava: And fussy Ava: Alright best sibling but that isn't much more of an achievement really Buster: Don't worry about it Buster: I know how great I am Ava: Yeah yeah, blah blah Buster: Get me the least shit sounding soft drink and I'll believe you Ava: If there's anything being tragically underage has taught me Ava: 👍 Buster: Cheers Buster: See you in 5 Ava: Bring your cute kid Buster: I taught him how to say “Sláinte” earlier so you'll be able to rate my achievements for yourself Buster: He ain't just a pretty face Ava: 🥺🥰 Ava: What a face though Buster: I can't take all the credit Buster: He takes after his mother Buster: Tell her how good she looks when we get in, yeah? I'm living a nightmare Ava: 'Course Ava: I've got a girlfriend, remember Ava: I know the drill, just amp up period level love 1000% for a pregnant bitch Buster: My wife ain't a insecure teenager Buster: But I appreciate the sentiment Buster: Just don't call her a bitch ever again Ava: I say it with love Ava: from one to another Ava: but got it, I'll remind her she's old Buster: Don't Buster: It'll be your funeral Ava: 😂 I only like winding you u Ava: p Ava: Don't need anyone crying on me Buster: Good Buster: I don't need to be breaking up any girl fights Buster: Especially when I've taught you both everything I know Ava: Even if me hitting a girl is more acceptable than you, I think everyone draws the line at a pregnant one Buster: Fine, I don't wanna pick you up off the floor once she's knocked you out and do a concussion test after someone pours a pint over you to bring you round Buster: I was trying to soften the blow of how it'll play out since I'd be powerless to stop the actual Ava: And I thought you were in the festive spirit Ava: 🙄 Ava: I'll take back this virgin cocktail, like 😏 Buster: Not without any spirits in me Buster: You'll have to take what you can get Ava: Few folk songs and you'll be well into it Buster: Voice of an angel, obviously Buster: Could've been a choir boy if not for everything else Ava: You took living vicariously a wee bit hard with the name already Buster: You'd have preferred me to name him after a silent film star, yeah? Ava: That was pure wishful thinking 🙊🤐🤫 Buster: Fucked over as my boy's been by not being named Rudolph Valentino or Roscoe Arbuckle, I reckon he'll be alright Buster: Cheers though Ava: I think Fatty murdered someone Ava: so as far as aspirations go, you're in the right direction Buster: I always am Buster: Never a misstep made, no matter what mum and dad say Ava: Alright 👼 its St Paddy's not confessional Ava: and the priest would be rare pissed off if you waltzed in and said you'd never done anything wrong 😂 Buster: He'd be a fine one to talk Ava: The drama of it all Buster: Again, I don't need to be told Buster: There's a kid here asking for you, except shouting's more the word Ava: He gets it 👏 Ava: 💃 Buster: Come out before he legs it in

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: What are you doing Saturday? Janis: Trick question, you're getting out my pocket and I'm cashing in that favour Janis: 🤞 Jimmy: there's your answer Janis: You don't know what it is yet Janis: might be a step too far, far as favours go Jimmy: go on, spit it out Janis: It's really shit, I'm aware, before you say it Janis: but it's my sister's kid's birthday party and I can't get out of it apparently 'cos they're little and shit so I have to make an appearance 😒 Janis: as if it'd remember but you know Jimmy: how old? Jimmy: that factors into how shit it'll be before you assume I'm baking or buying balloons Janis: you just have to come with not plan it Janis: oh and you could bring bobby if you need to Jimmy: alright Janis: it's a 1st birthday but there'll be kids his age too so Janis: only you and I need suffer 'cos I said so Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you don't have to but Jimmy: I said alright Jimmy: calm it down, my dear Janis: I am calm Janis: they're extra, is what I'm trying to warn you Jimmy: I've met Gracie, I reckon that's fair warning Janis: just saying Janis: pretend you're mute if any of them start yapping Jimmy: 💪 and 🤐 got it Janis: 😏 your specialty, exactly Jimmy: nowt challenging bout none of it Janis: trust, there is Janis: but thanks Jimmy: if you ain't up to it, mate Jimmy: just saying, I am Jimmy: no challenge too big Janis: already told you, got no choice, like Janis: not ability it's desire Jimmy: 🎻💔🎻 Jimmy: don't need owt but desire for me Janis: 🙄 lord Janis: do I need to warn them about you as well 😏 Jimmy: you telling me you ain't Janis: my family have low standards Janis: you're basically an 😇 to them Janis: soz to your rep Jimmy: properly 😢💔💔💔😢 Janis: I know Janis: such a bad boy, like Janis: but you know you ain't knocked me about or knocked me up so winner Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: apparently the dress code is kinda well, dressy so Janis: another warning Jimmy: what are you saying about my clothes there, babe? Janis: I like your clothes Janis: but awkward enough without feeling underdressed Janis: fuck knows what I'll find to put on Jimmy: take me shopping then, rich girl Jimmy: sort yourself out at the same time Janis: ugh Jimmy: come on Jimmy: it'll be a laugh Janis: alright Janis: it won't but why not Jimmy: challenge accepted Janis: 👍 Janis: when you wanna go Jimmy: when are you gonna gimme that real enthusiasm that I crave? Janis: I can't be excited about playing dress up, soz Jimmy: be excited about trying clothes on with me, dickhead Janis: alright Janis: 😏 I'll try Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: we can go in a bit then Janis: you at work? Jimmy: not gonna let on that I'm with my other girlfriend 👵💕 Jimmy: bit rude that Janis: rather know Janis: might have some fashion I can cop Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: hang on, I'll have a look Janis: tah Jimmy: florals 👍 or 👎 Janis: probably 👍 but I think it'd spontaneously combust if it touched me so Janis: '💎💎 EXTRA 🍾!!!!!!!!! HONEY 💋 But also make it pink & girlie 🌸🌺🌺🌸' is what we're going for Janis: as if that means anything Jimmy: Gracie, Gracie, Gracie Jimmy: what the fuck Jimmy: she'd be good for a borrow as long as you scrub yourself after Janis: however did you guess 🙄 Janis: bit rude to say about your missus Jimmy: I serve her ☕ every day Jimmy: on form today you an' all Janis: poor you Janis: and what are you talking about Jimmy: take my compliments about how funny you are and shut up Janis: don't tell me to shut up just 'cos you're busy with your main bitch Janis: learn some time management if you're gonna keep this up Jimmy: you're my main, she's one of many side chicks Jimmy: get it right Janis: 😩😭😍 Janis: so sweet Jimmy: 💕 Janis: gonna need to pre-drink this Jimmy: #duh Jimmy: getting us both wrecked Janis: the only way I can remotely do this Jimmy: I won't let you end up face down in the cake like my mum was for our kid's 1st Jimmy: not a #mood Janis: no Janis: only so much trauma you can bill as character building Janis: this little fuck already has enough Jimmy: I'll buy the kid an orchestra Janis: entertainment sorted Jimmy: 👍 Janis: going for a run Janis: in a bit Jimmy: run my way Janis: nah it's okay Janis: I'm not in the mood Janis: a good one Jimmy: and what? Jimmy: miserable twat every day me Janis: idk Janis: I just Jimmy: I get it Jimmy: why else do you think I want you here, girl? Janis: what do you mean? Jimmy: my only job ain't pouring coffee Jimmy: might cheer you up Jimmy: weird idea, I know Janis: great Janis: now I sound like a dick Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: shit sounds like how it is Janis: I can't explain Janis: it'd take me forever and you don't need to know Janis: I just hate being around them Jimmy: You just said as much as you needed to Jimmy: we ain't gotta ⛏️ Jimmy: left the mines behind, like Janis: alright Janis: but maybe I'm not ready to be cheered up Janis: all we do is bullshit being happy 'round here Jimmy: solidarity for feeling like shit even easier Janis: babe Jimmy: ? Janis: don't be nice Jimmy: alright Janis: convincing Jimmy: 🔪🔪alright 💔💔 Jimmy: better? Janis: you couldn't be mean if you tried 😏 Jimmy: are you challenging me? Janis: not really Janis: idk what I want Janis: be nice maybe Jimmy: baby Janis: mm Janis: I really hate everyone but you Jimmy: I love you Jimmy: bollocks to everyone else Janis: maybe that's what I wanted Janis: feels good anyway Janis: never don't Janis: Oh, and I love you too Jimmy: are you running? 'cause you're typing like you might be on it Janis: how presumptuous Janis: also don't do yourself down like that, it's not the ONLY time I ever say it Jimmy: 😏 Janis: not what I mean Janis: filth Jimmy: don't sound like me Jimmy: who else you chatting to? Janis: just the side hoes Janis: obvs Jimmy: 👋 Janis: are you saying hello to them or bye to me Jimmy: might be either Jimmy: keeping you guessing like that Janis: 🙄 Janis: so mysterious Jimmy: come here to me and I'll let you know Janis: quite the offer Jimmy: take it then Janis: hot Jimmy: 'course I am Janis: 😏 Janis: maybe I've had some drink but you can't blame me Jimmy: how much catching up I gotta do? Janis: do you have the shit mood to double down with Janis: if not just keep me company Janis: I miss you Jimmy: where am I going then? Janis: i'm coming there doofus Jimmy: I'm near done, we can go wherever Janis: home? Jimmy: I get it, you want real love 🐶💕 Janis: mhmm Janis: read my mind Jimmy: I can't promise she's home alone waiting for you though Janis: we're never alone Jimmy: I'll take you somewhere we can be Janis: yeah? Jimmy: I'm thinking Janis: hot Jimmy: don't put me off Janis: I'm down to barricade the door don't worry Jimmy: you're so Janis: I know Jimmy: I miss you too Janis: how much Jimmy: how much do you think? Janis: not enough Jimmy: what's enough? Janis: so much that we never leave bed again Janis: not much to ask for really Jimmy: what about so much we barely make it to bed? Jimmy: and then we never leave Janis: 😋 Janis: that's allowed Jimmy: good 'cause nobody can stop me Jimmy: that's how much I miss you, girl Janis: don't stop Janis: you're killing me Jimmy: I just said I can't Janis: good Jimmy: I've missed you all day Janis: it's unfair I can't be with you all the time actually Jimmy: I could get you a job here but I'd have to teach you some customer service first Janis: can't even say it's rude Janis: just fair Jimmy: get over here, lesson starts when you show up Janis: 😏 Janis: you do remember what happened when I turned up at your last job, yeah Jimmy: I weren't fuming about that then and I ain't gonna be now Janis: okay Janis: omw for my trial shift Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: kicking the stranglers out, I reckon you need 1 on 1 instruction Janis: shit Janis: okay Janis: taking this very serious now Jimmy: it is serious, don't be pissing about Janis: aye aye Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt remember Janis: are you doubting me Janis: always 🥇 Janis: main bitch, remember Jimmy: giving you a chance to prove me wrong 'cause you're about that Jimmy: I'm gonna give you everything you want Janis: I really like you, you know Jimmy: main bitch an' all #obvs Janis: you know it Jimmy: 💕 Janis: are you gonna let me wear the apron or what Janis: the real questions Jimmy: what else are you gonna be wearing? Janis: nothing pink Janis: that's for sure Janis: the rest is up to you Jimmy: I heard nothing let's go with that Janis: works for me Janis: 🤤 Jimmy: I ain't requesting that be your uniform whenever you're on shift though, even if tips would be at a record high Jimmy: I can't be smacking every dickhead that comes in Janis: You're cute Jimmy: You're Janis: hanging on the edge of my seat, like Janis: what 😏 Jimmy: making me not wanna leave work Jimmy: such a skill that Janis: I'm motivational Janis: hire me for that alone Jimmy: convincing too Janis: sounds promising Janis: still, put me through my paces, like Jimmy: 'course Jimmy: It ain't an easy job, babe Janis: I can take it Janis: 💪 Jimmy: I know Janis: k have you got rid of everyone, nearly there Jimmy: on my own 💔🎻🎻 Janis: my poor baby Jimmy: Get a move on Jimmy: I need you Janis: [showin' up] Jimmy: [enthusiastic welcome before she's even really through the door cos we know he would] Janis: [just telling him how bad you missed him between kisses] Jimmy: [being very vocal in between kisses too but not with words] Janis: ['that's customer service is it?' 'cos clearly about it] Jimmy: ['keen, you ain't even in the door yet' but he ain't stopping any of what he's doing to let her lol] Janis: [puts one foot in like a nerd 'come on, gimme a chance, like'] Jimmy: [picks her up and carries her over the threshold like a bigger nerd] Janis: ['just want the job, if I'm honest, not your last name but' but you're grinning 'cos you love it] Jimmy: ['what makes you think I wouldn't take yours?' and grinning back cos imagine haha he's the whitest 'what were it again?'] Janis: [says it excessive accented] Jimmy: [shamelessly 😍 cos that's hot] Janis: [rolls her eyes 'cos always a thing but not mad] Jimmy: [leads her over to the counter and doing like a ghost pottery wheel style mood because down to the business of closing up but make it flirty] Janis: [just loving life and purposely messing up (but not drastically, not a dick lmao) so he has to show her again] Jimmy: [we're all just loving life being nerds] Janis: ['so, I got the job, right?' and a LOOK of course] Jimmy: [giving her a LOOK back and putting the apron on her as he takes other shit off her like maybe lemme just see how this looks] Janis: ['if any of your co-workers walk in right now, I swear to god' but showing off what your mama gave ya] Jimmy: [just loling 'could be your co-workers too' cos give her them compliments and then kisses obvs] Janis: ['don't worry, you'll still be my favourite'] Jimmy: [casually gonna just put her on that counter like the time at the CG when they put on a show for the squad but this time there ain't no audience bye] Janis: [just smiles like this is why and we know the rest honey] Jimmy: [god bless you babies then go home and snuggle Twix like that's your job] Janis: [when she called it home, bye] Jimmy: [technically it is cos we said she was moving in and he was getting a bigger bed so] Janis: [yeah but emotions boo] Jimmy: [you know it got me bitch] Janis: [just wait 'til you have your own forreal kids] Jimmy: [I will cry when we do that, don't even] Janis: [but for now, there's a party you don't wanna be at]