#I'll get one when my sister visits at the end of next month. That's something at least

[yellowgreendinno]

Gauche/Marie Adlai headcanons

The door to his room, against popular belief, does not have a Marie carving in it, but its still recognizable. Its a wooden... thingy. nobody knows how to get in. Except Gordon and Grey. One day, Grey was gonna go talk to Gauche into his room, and Vanessa happened to be in the hallway, and saw Grey crouching down on the floor. She knocked thrice, and pushed. When the door moved VERTICALLY, Vanessa realised the door was a fucking mirror. A full body mirror turned around and used 👏 as 👏 a 👏 door 👏 so it can be pushed to the other side, right? here's where Gordon comes in. He just runs and jumps up, kicks the upper part with his feet and goes in without knocking. When Marie grew up and visited Gauche at the HQ, she was smart as fuck. She twisted a thingy the mirror had on the side, and it disconnected itself from one side, making it a door. Nobody knows aside from Gauche, though.

☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☽☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾☾

Gauche is able to resist Marie's eye magic. And Julius was like OmAiGodEyEMaGic. Gauche did not hesitate.

Marie had resembled child innocence, but as she grew up, she took after her brother's resting bitch face when she wanted.

She and Gauche are very similar in personality, know each other's favourite things, they have inside jokes...

like this one time, Marie told bullies as a kid that "my brother's a magic knight and he'll put you in jail" so now whenever anyone annoys Gauche after Marie became a magic knight he'll say "and my sister's a magic knight and she'll put you in jail".

Gauche has a shirt Theresia gave him that says "Mad Man", so Marie got one that says "I'm with Mad Man"

They prank Theresia to piss her off.

And they both know Mereoleona and Fuegoleon to a personal level.

Gauche's mirror eye was caused my Marie.

When she was a baby, she couldn't control her eye magic, so she basically made Gauche's eye turn into a mirror as a combination of eye and mirror magic.

Marie joined the Coral Peacocks squad, and whenever she hears there'll be a joint mission, she crosses her fingers and prays to gods above for it to be with the Black Bulls.

Both of them became really busy people, but once a month they go to park in their hometown to chill out

She knows Nash and Recca, both magic knights themselves.

Once, Marie heard the famous "Gauche, you hurt Grey and I'll hurt you" and Marie said "No, you hurt him and I'll hurt you" and slapped her across the face.

Gauche knows how to sing. Like he knows how to sing. Its a sight only Marie has seen, but if you hear him, you'll fall in love.

Which takes me to the next point, Marie also knows how to sing, and they both play various instruments, so they often do music duos with songs they wrote together in a treehouse in their hometown.

They sound something like the Bon Iver band and Taylor Swift, but younger.

She understood Gauche's reason to protect her so much over time, and ended up protecting him as well.

They have nightmares about the day Gauche almost died at the same time.

They just feel it, and Marie just waits at the door of the church and Gauche takes a broom there, and they ask "are you okay?" at the same time its so cute ^_^. Then they fly in their brooms (Gauche has an amulet Marie gave to him and she has a piece of Gauche's old shirt tied to it, mind you) to their old treehouse.

In Marie's fifteenth birthday, Gauche gave her a box full of their mother's clothes.

Marie didn't like Grey at first, she thought she'd take her big bro away.

[possumsandprose]

Elriel Day 1

This story doesn't contain any of the spoilers I posted (I figured since it was so close, spoiling it would be pointless), but I hope you all enjoy! I'd love to hear your thoughts, so please comment or drop me an ask. This is my first time writing something like this, so constructive criticism is definitely welcomed.

Word count: 1.5K

TW: depression, mentions of Az's abuse as a child

Azriel was running late. He knew he should have left sooner, but then Cassian had started pestering him about why he was in such a hurry to leave training and now Elain would be waiting. He sighed. At least he would still get to see her today, he thought, it would definitely be the highlight of his week. It had all started when he had accidentally come across her at his favourite cafe, and she had stopped to talk with him. They had ended up talking for an hour, before Elain sadly had to leave to meet an elderly fae whose garden she was now caring for. But before she had gone, she had blushingly asked if he wanted to meet up again. He knew it was a risk, given that Rhys could easily have gotten wind of it and had his hide, but he couldn't say no to Elain's doe brown eyes watching him hopefully. So, they agreed to start meeting in the garden. Ever since then, for the past 3 months, they had been conducting secret meetings in Elain's gardens, where they would walk and talk about whatever they wished. They had grown close over that time, Elain opening up to him about things he was pretty sure she'd never told anyone else. In return, he had told her secrets from his life, of which he had many. Though nothing about his childhood. Perhaps soon he would delve into it, but he wasn't sure how she'd take it. He landed next to the large fountain in the middle, and Elain was sitting nearby, carefully pruning the roses.

 "Azriel!" She squealed in delight, jumping up and hugging him.

He hugged her back, revelling in the fact that he could touch her here and now, even if it was forbidden. They began to walk, Elain speaking about her life, and her gardens, and the new recipes she was trying. She spoke about Nyx, whom she often babysat, and how he was growing, and had even begun to start gliding on his little wings. Az talked of his trips, of the interesting places he had visited, and she listened with rapt attention.

"Can I ask you something?" she said, and he detected a slight sense of nervousness in her voice.

 "Anything, my lady," he replied, wondering what she would say. They had broached sensitive topics before, and he guessed they were about to now, but he wasn't sure what warranted the fear on her scent.

 "Do you...do you ever feel like you miss the sunshine, even when you're standing right out in it? Do you ever feel trapped, even when flying in the open sky? Do you ever wonder what purpose there is for being alive, even when you are surrounded by people who love you?" He had not been expecting this, and was beginning to formulate an answer, but Elain wasn't finished.

 "I love my life here, I truly do, and I have so many things to be grateful for. But...I feel trapped. Trapped by the expectations of my sisters, by the rules put in place in the life I was never allowed a say in, by the mating bond I never asked for but seemed forced to accept, and by my own insecurities. Sometimes I wonder what my purpose is, if all I'll ever do is tend to my little gardens for the rest of my immortal life. I love my family very much, but I have always been the odd one out. My sisters are happily mated, Nesta to the general of armies, while she herself trains female warriors and wields the power of Death itself, and Feyre to the most powerful High Lord in history, blessed by the magic of all 7, and she's already started a family. And I...I cannot fight. I have magic, but no idea how to use it. I cannot wield a sword, I cannot lead an army, I cannot govern a land, I cannot even be a good spouse, for it seems my only option is a male I do not love."

 Tears were starting to pour down her cheeks now, and Az sat down and hugged her while she continued speaking after burying her head in his chest.

"I know all of you will love me no matter what, but I wish I could do something to make myself worthwhile. My skills are trivial and useless, and even though Nesta has offered to train me, I have no desire to do so. But it seems...it seems if I want to fit in, that's all there is."

Elain finished her speech, and was now fully sobbing into his chest, her small body shaking against him. He knew that it had taken a lot of courage for her to share this with him, and the fact she shared something so personal with him touched him deeply.

"I know how you feel. When I was a boy, all I ever knew was darkness, the darkness of the cellar, and the pain inflicted by my father and stepbrothers. I prayed to the Mother and whatever gods would listen that they would grant me light, sunshine, a way out. When the shadows began whispering to me, shortly after my hands were burned, I realized this could be my way out. Whatever deities rest above the clouds had bestowed me with good fortune, and finally I would be free. But it was not as I had imagined. When my father dragged me out, he threw me into the Illyrian camps, a bastard born nobody who couldn't even fly and had magic he didn't know how to use. But Rhys' mother took me in, and she was kind to me. Under her care, I learned how to wield what power I had been given, and I met Rhys and Cassian, my true family. But even then, still I was different. As a high fae, Rhys had magic, but he was the only one besides me. I felt perpetually out of place, and often I still do.

“But you know, over my 5 centuries on this earth, I've learned that it's okay to be different. To defy expectations. To life your own life. You don't have to be the woman your sisters expect you to be if you don't want to. You don't have to mate yourself to Lucien if you don't love him. You most certainly don't need to be a fighter or anything like it in order to be worth something. Everyone has different strengths, and personally I think the fact that you're different makes you more interesting. Your skills aren't useless-after all, behind every single warrior is someone who keeps them healthy, and the fact that you can cook, clean, and garden gives you a set of tools I'm pretty sure no Illyrian male has ever possessed."

That got a small giggle out of her, and her tears had stopped. She was looking up at him, and though her eyes were red and puffy, she had a small smile on her face, and Az didn't think she'd ever looked more beautiful.

"Your sisters are wonderful, amazing females, but you are not your sisters, nor are you supposed to be. You can be a wonderful, amazing female in your own way, and I think you already are. And you are always deserving of love, no matter what path of life you choose to take." Elain hugged him tightly as he finished, and he hugged her back, kissing the top of her head, wings cocooning them together, shielding them from the outside world.

 "Thank you. Your words, your story...it means a great deal that you trust me enough to share it with me. And for what it's worth, I care for you a great deal. I know it can't have been easy for you, even as an adult, but if you ever feel like no one cares...I will always care for you. No matter what. You've become my best friend, my confidant, my support, and it means everything to me. In a time where I had no one and nothing, you were there, and for that I can never truly express my gratitude."

 But she didn't have to. And they both knew it, the bond between them that had formed over the course of their meetings, the one that Rhys had tried so hard to stop, it had grown unbreakable, and it would be impossible to hide for much longer. Through the course of their secret meetings, and through the shy glances and restricted touches that passed between them when they were together in the presence of family, they had found each other, perhaps not mates, but with a different kind of bond. And for them, that was enough.

A/N: We don't really know much about Elain, so I kind of projected the beliefs of some people in this fandom (that in order to be an interesting fantasy heroine you have to be some sort of war queen, which personally I think is a way overused trope in YA fantasy, so whenever SJM finally cranks out ACOTAR 5, I really hope she doesn't take Elain down the same route) as her own thoughts about herself, however as this is a very much pro-Elain blog I agree with Az here. Being different is a good thing, and having different hobbies and skillsets than others is often more interesting.

Taglist: @elriel-month

[stacotto]

*Inhale for four, exhale for four* Alright, let's get into it.

Guess we'll just start at the start, Asticassia is far more wrecked than we could see at the end of episode 20, death count is probably in the scores if not hundreds, and the survivors are basically in a refugee camp. Earth House and Suletta out here doing their best to make everyone comfortable, which automatically makes them the GOAT house. Petra's alive...ish! Mio's President now, for whatever that's worth, Quinharbor is a bombed-out crater, and those slimy Peil crones somehow managed to once again pull the "we didn't know this unethical thing was being done right beneath our noses" card (even if they really didn't know until someone else told them, I wouldn't put it past them to want a piece of that pie). More on them later.

The meeting between Earth House, Guston, and Belmeria is a perfect example of what I like to see in an infodump; nothing is said that characters in the room should already know, everything is news to someone. I really really dig now Suletta handled relaying her nature as a clone, and maybe feeling a little smug that my headcanon that those flashes of Eri's memories of the Vanadis Incident really were a full memory share between the two. And of course, Suletta understanding that there is probably no reasoning with Prospera, but no unnecessary angst beyond that. I like it, it's refreshing. Also hot damn, we've been theorizing about a "Caliban" Gundam for months and this is not what any of us expected but I'm not complaining; it really is thematically appropriate that Prospera's creation would be piloting the machine named after Prospero's servant.

Now to the real spectacle of the episode: The Space Assembly League charging headfirst into something they should know could not possibly end well. To paraphrase what I've been saying about Quiet Zero ever since episode 16; "You may have your guns, but I control all the triggers". You literally cannot fight against it with any conventional weapon. The only way to fight against the QZ Data Storm network is with a Gundam of your own, and Sophie Pulone showed us exactly why even that is a toss-up. The more I think about it, the more I feel we're building up to a reveal that Suletta may have actually inherited her sister's affinity to the Data Storm, it just might need a little push to fully manifest.

Miorine really cannot catch a break here. She may be President, but that pales in comparison to the world falling apart around her. Quinharbor is in ruins. Her father is still in a coma. The League has popular support to dismantle the Group by force. It's really telling that Sarius is the one telling her "Look, I'll take the L on this, you keep the Group together" but she completely refuses to sacrifice anyone else, one of my favorite tropes when done well. It'll be interesting to see what her next move is.

Ah, Elan Ceres Number 5. Curious as to how he went from Ur's cockpit to sneaking around Asticassia but that's neither here nor there; he's finally given up the act (and genuinely apologized to Suletta, that was good) and is joining up with the heroes for the final act, which I appreciate. He says "no Gundam" which does pique my curiosity as to how he's going to contribute - Enhanced Persons are no doubt chosen by the Peil AI for piloting skill, so I doubt that he won't be piloting period - but I do get the distinct feeling that he's going to pay the CEOs and Elan Prime a visit...with bullets.

Welp, guess we know who's piloting the Schwarzette whenever that comes up now; Lauda about to follow in the infamous footsteps of one "Graze" Ein Dalton. I do kinda hope that someone can snap him out of it before it's too late; most likely candidate is probably Petra if she can wake up soon, given that A) He's definitely going to try and kill Miorine, so that knocks her out, B) there's no way he's going to listen to Guel after learning he's the one who killed Vim (even if it was by accident in self-defense), and C) Suletta is still the "Mercurian Wench who ruined everything" in his eyes. If he can't be reasoned with, Guel's probably going to have to kill him, I'll put my chips on that.

We in the endgame now.

[rudjedet]

Oh hey! Another anosmic! So rare to see. I'll admit, I can smell now, but I was definitely born without the ability to do so.

My parents didn't notice it until I was 5 and I couldn't smell Vick's VapoRub, but they quickly found me like, the only anosmia clinic in the country and the first in the world, Dr. Henkin's Taste and Smell Clinic. It was and is unlike any clinic I've been to. They had rows of brown glass bottles of (probably) pungent liquids, they would collect saliva from you using name-brand lemon juice, you would get your blood drawn monthly in the doctor's own office, a little closet-sized room stacked floor to ceiling with binders. (Maybe this description is just showing how privileged i am) Anyway he treated me with an athsma medicine for 3-4 years and it indeed worked.

The first thing I smelled was my mom's minty breath after she brushed her teeth. Not having any frame of reference, I called it stinky lol

I've found smell to be a very valuable sense, and I'm eternally grateful to Henkin and his colleagues. When I was maybe 10 I was camping with my father and my sister, and me and my sister were in a tent together with a space heater. Had I not smelled the space heater burning my sister's blanket, we both could have been seriously burned.

About your question, I've never noticed distinctly different smells coming from anyone I know. Sweat smells the same on everybody, farts can smell a little different based on diet, same goes for mouth smell, we all sort of smell the same. The closest I can think of to "people's scents smell different" is people mistaking the idea of cologne or perfume for something like animal musk, which it Is Not.

But then again I do have those anonymized MRIs floating around the clinic's website, so maybe my sense of smell isn't exactly normal lmao

Oh that's cool! Based on all the responses, whether or not you can smell other people (and even whether sugar granulate has a scent) seems to be highly dependent on a ton of factors. Perfume and other hygiene products is one thing, but there's definitely people saying they can recognise certain people under certain circumstances based on their scent.

Most of you weren't around for this, but during my second pregnancy I suddenly started being able to smell (and this was the thing that made me side eye my uterus because I hadn't done a pregnancy test at that point yet). The first whiff of something I caught was the window cleaner I was using at work. It smelled vaguely sweet, and it was such a weird experience. The next morning I visited bestie and we tore open her spices cabinet just shoving anything and everything into my nostrils. I could mostly get the pungent stuff like paprika and dried ginger. Two weeks later we were out for ramen and that's when I recognised my first smell without knowing what it was beforehand (the ginger in the gyoza).

I lost that baby and the smelling went away again, but for my last pregnancy the same thing happened. Unfortunately what also happened is that I ended up with pregnancy rhinitis and hay fever (hubs has hay fever and our kiddo does too, so throughout pregnancy I was suffering thanks to his overly excited immune system copying onto baby), so there wasn't much smelling going on during the pregnancy itself. It did persist for about 6 months post-partum, and I did find out that if I keep my dust allergy under control with antihistamines, I can sort of smell again once my ovulation rolls around.

Interestingly and opposite you, my immediate response to any scent is "oh wow that's nice!", I guess just because I can even smell it lmao. But once I get used to them, there's room for nuance. My favourite scents are ginger, properly aged cheese, and my daughter. I will say I once walked into a group of old humans (choir practice, lmao) and... didn't like it, it was this uncomfortable wall of something undefinable. Dirty diapers are ... oddly minty? I wouldn't classify it as a "stink" but it's a scent that definitely lingers.

The thing with human personal scents and why I operated on the notion that all humans in general would be able to recognise someone based on scent is part having smelled my own kid before and hearing a lot of mums say they love the scents of their children, part knowing that perfume does tend to travel across larger distances, part being told that I have a pretty present personal scent, part being autistic and having overactive other senses and thus thinking "well scent would be the same then wouldn't it", and part just... not having any direct experience with it lmao. As with everything scent-related everyone's replies have all been extremely elucidating, just like the time I ended up hyperfocussing on perfumes.

[bookwyrminspiration]

Keeper Timeline (Sans Stellarlune)

Since not everyone has read Stellarlune yet, @sunscribes requested a version of this timeline free of spoilers, so here it is! It's practically identical to the other, so don't worry on missing out on anything!

Summary: The keeper series takes place over the course of almost 2 1/2 years. The longest book is book one, which takes 9 months, and the shortest (excluding Unlocked) is book 8, which takes 3 weeks.

I've included the time in each book (highlighted in blue), when notable events (I've likely skipped a few) happen, and the time between each book. My notes are more in depth, so if you have specific questions feel free to ask--though I cannot promise I'll be able to answer them.

Book 1: 9 months long. Week 1, Sophie leaves her family and starts Foxfire. 2 months in, she gets Iggy and wins the Splotching Tournament. 4 months in are midterms. 5 1/2 months in she has her first tribunal. 7 1/2 months in is her allergy incident and her adoption cancellation. 8 months in she's kidnapped for ten days. 8 months and 3 weeks in is her second tribunal and her adoption by Grady and Edaline.

There is an estimated 3 month interim.

Book 2: 5 weeks. Week 1, Silveny is found, the Ruewens visit Brant, and the kids practice for the opening ceremonies. Week 2, Sophie and Alden visit Exile, Foxfire has its ceremonies, and Alden's mind breaks. Beginning of week 3, Foxfire starts; end of week 3 is Alden's planting. Beginning of week 4, Sophie and Keefe go to the Black Swan hideout to fix her, learn she can teleport, and she heals Alden the next day. Week 5, the Celestial Festival where Silveny enters the Sanctuary.

There is a 2 week interim.

Book 3: almost 4 weeks. Week 1, Fintan is healed and Kenric dies with the funeral a few days later. Week 3, Sophie is given her restricting circlet. Mid week 4 is the final confrontation with Brant and Mount Everest.

There is an estimated 1 day interim.

Book 4: almost 6 weeks. Day 1, the kotlcrew join the Black Swan. Week 2, Sophie and Keefe attempt to trick information out of Gethen. Week 3, they attempt to break into Exile, fail, and instead exchange Gethen for Prentice. Week 4, they begin attending Exillium and meet Tam and Linh. Week 5, Silveny is revealed to be pregnant. Week 6, they storm Ravagog and Keefe runs away.

There is a 3 week interim.

Book 5: 4 weeks. Day 1, Keefe explodes Foxfire. Day 2, a small group revisits where Dex and Sophie were taken and tortured. The end of week 1, the famous sleepover and Wylie's kidnapping/torture. Week 3, Sophie, Forkle, and Oralie visit Gethen. Week 4, Sophie manifests as an enhancer; the next day Tam, Fitz, and Sophie confront the Neverseen (and Keefe), and the treaty negotiations are the day after that, killing Forkle. At the end of week 4, Sophie visits her human family to find them missing.

There is no interim.

Book 6: 4 1/2 months. Day 1, Sophie's sister moves to the Lost Cities. Week 1, Forkle twin reveal, Marella's pyrokinesis reveal, visiting King Dimitar (Keefe spars), introducing Ro, and the storming of the first Nightfall (recovering Alvar). Week 2, Foxfire starts. Week 4, Prentice is healed. Week 5, Vespera's name is revealed. Sophie then spends 3 months as a "zombie-girl." 4 months and 1 week in, the second Nightfall is found and raided, the Atlantis forcefield broken, and her parents recovered. 4 1/2 months in, Amy leaves, and it's found alvar has no memories.

There is a "weeks" long interim, which I've reasoned to be about 3 1/2 months long. This is based in logic but is, however, unverified.

Book 7: about 8 1/2 weeks. Day 1, Alvar's trial, Sophie and Fitz are attacked and put in the Healing Center. Week 2, Sophie begins her skill training with Keefe. At the beginning of week 3, Fitz is woken, and at the end of the week they leave the Healing Center. Week 5, Silveny gives birth to the alicorn twins. Week 6, Sophie and Fitz meet with Fintan, where he reveals something to do with the Celestial Festival. Week 7, the Celestial Festival fight happens (troll hive), and Tam is kidnapped. About a week and a half later, Sophie learns she's unmatchable.

There is a 9 day interim.

Book 8: 3 weeks. The beginning of week 1, Team Valiant is formed and Amy/Sophie recover erased memories. The end of week 1, Sophie has her abilities reset after a meeting with King Enki. Mid week 2 is when Fitz gives Sophie the infamous painting. The beginning of week 3, Sophie learns Oralie is her mother, finds Alvar at Candleshade, and breaks up with Fitz. Mid week 3 is the battle of Loamnore (Keefe unconscious, King Enki betrayal, Tam reunited, Glimmer, etc.). At the end of week 3 Oralie approaches Sophie to open her cache.

There is no interim.

Book 8.5: 3 days. Day 1, Oralie's cache is opened, Keefe wakes, and Sophie is told to stay away. Day 2, Fitz tells Sophie to reach out to Keefe telepathically. Day 3, the Dizznee's and Elwin try to help Keefe, Sophie and a few others (with Glimmer) go to the storehouse, she burns it down, and Keefe leaves again.

Again, this isn't perfect and I'm capable of error, but I hope this helps! I tried to keep this as identical to the other as possible so if you need this version, you don't feel like you're missing anything :)

[somethingusefulfromflorida]

I was spoiled last summer because I got to go on 3 trips, essentially 3 vacations, the first vacations I'd taken since my cousin's wedding in 2018.

For my birthday in May, I went to Busch Gardens and a youtuber boxing match with some friends. In June I went to a week-long family reunion in DC, Maryland and Pennsylvania; we had a memorial for my Grammy who passed away in 2021, visited some of my mom's cousins I'd never met before, spent a whole day at Six Flags America with my own cousins, and toured the National Mall/Smithsonian. In August, I had a longshot job interview at a library in the city I want to move to, so I took time off work to bus up, crashed with my sister, and aced the first round with flying colors; I spent a congratulatory week in town looking for an apartment, then headed home with some promising leads and absolutely BOMBED the second round, evaporating my best chance at getting off the godforsaken rock I've been stuck on since I graduated college.

This year, I don't have any real plans. I finally bought my own car, but now I have to start the whole job and apartment search from square one with severely diminished savings. I wanted to quit my current job last weekend, but I chickened out because I need the money. If I leave sometime this summer and find an apartment to sublease, I'd have to move out in August anyway because all the leases expire just in time for the fall semester. Move-out and move-in are a week or two apart, so I'd have to come back home anyway while I was between leases, assuming I was even able to secure a full year lease when I'm competing with something like fifty thousand college students in a town with a population of less than 150,000. It seems like every new building being constructed up there is an apartment complex, but they fill up almost immediately and rent never goes down.

I can't stay in the Keys much longer. There's nothing for me down here. If I can't move until August, I at least need to take a break from work and travel before my student loans inevitably come due because the nazi bastards on SCOTUS think only rich fucks deserve debt forgiveness and the measly poors have to prop them up. I want to enjoy my summer, because it's all downhill from here. The economy is on the verge of collapse and we're heading into another dumpster fire of a presidential election (it feels like every cycle is worse than the last). I need a distraction. I need an outlet. I need to take advantage of the freedom my car affords me before shit hits the fan and I'm forced to come crawling back to a job I barely tolerate on an island I despise with every fiber of my being. If I don't get out soon, I don't know when I'll get my next shot.

Next April I'm going on a roadtrip to Ohio to view the total solar eclipse, so I at least have that to look forward to if nothing else. Just 11 months to go.

Who am I kidding? I won't survive down here another year. This place is eroding my mental health. It is absolutely imperative that I move before summer ends, lease or no lease. I'd rather live out of my car for a while than be stuck here indefinitely.

[mixdgrlproblems]

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A post shared by Mixed Girl Problems (@mixdgrlprblems)

Unfortunately IG has made it more difficult to share posts to Tumblr and Twitter, what's up with that? I'm still active!

April's #newprofilepic winner is... @siah.bb! "Hi💐🌸I’m Siah. My ethnicity is #Black #Nicaraguan #NativeAmerican #French & #Irish! A bunch more that my grandma would tell me but that’s all I know.

My biggest #mixedgirlproblem is feeling less connected to my Nicaraguan history. Half of what makes me #mixed. I look Black for the most part and the #Hispanic part of me is there, I just don’t see it being apparent to others, so to me it feels like part of my family isn’t being acknowledged. Also, not being able to speak or understand #Spanish felt so disappointing to me. When half of my family has come from #Nicaragua. My dad grew up in Nicaragua and came here with his family earlier in his life. My #abuelita only knew Spanish, so throughout my whole middle school, high school, and beginning of college I tried my best to learn Spanish, but could never pick it up like my younger sister could. She had got to live with my abuelita more. I went to college when my abuelita moved in with our family. I wanted to be there with them but learned what I could when I visited them. #BeingHispanic and not knowing Spanish is also my #mixedgirlproblem.

One thing I Love about being a #mixedgirl is that by highlighting some features and changing others, a mixed girls looks can change dramatically. Curly beautiful hair one day, straightened and pulled back hair the next. Love a glamorous transformation💫🎀 I don’t mind getting the question "what are you mixed with?" because then I can highlight the #halfofmyheritage that isn’t obvious. It’s not something I hear often but it’s interesting to hear what people are interested in upon meeting a mixed girl."

Twitter siah_bb

TikTok siah.bby

Snapchat siah.beebs

Congratulations to her! Don't fret. I'll be choosing May's winner at the end of the month!

🏴🇺🇸🇳🇮🇫🇷🇮🇪

#mixedgirlproblems #mixedgirls

[brighteststar707]

Ohhh, are we sharing things now? I actually have plenty of great (mostly) childhood memories I tend to think about often.

In my grandma's neighborhood, there's a big line of only road and I remember how me, my sister and everyone else who had bikes there would often get out at the evening to just do circles, the wind always felt amazing and since it was summer, doing it at evening to around night was always great.

But this one night, EVERYONE had taken their bikes out. I still remember how happy I felt when I did circles with them. If I remember correctly, i wasn't able to use the bike without those protection lil wheels but that night, our neighbor next door helped me and encouraged me to keep going even though I fell down a lot. In the end? I leaned to do it without any help from those lil wheels!

I really wish I could experience that again but I know it will never happen. Some of our neighbors grandkids doesn't really visit anymore now that they are grown. And It's actually been years since I've been to my grandma's but this time, I made the decision to go there this upcoming summer! (if I pass my final exams doe sksksajdbw)

I used to go there every summer so I'm hella excited and looking forward to it. I'm also planning on working on my digital art skills and take advantage of these three months to get better with this artist friend of mine I have at school.

But even though those other kids don't visit there anymore. I'm happy that at least I have these memories of us playing plenty of games and just using our bikes.

I have so many nice memories but I'll stop here sksksk

Anna, I'm happy to see you again, it feels like it's been ages! I hope you're doing well!

That memory sounds absolutely magical, so many of you all together on your bicycles having fun. Thank you for sharing it with me! Your neighbour encouraging you to learn to ride without training wheels is so lovely, what a fun way to learn! It took me forever to learn to ride a bike without training wheels, and i still remember the feeling of riding without them for the first time. It's wonderful.

There is something so nostalgic and bittersweet about childhood memories like this, isn't there? These warm happy memories that we love dearly but cannot return to because things change.

I went though a similar feeling of nostalgia recently. I visited home for the first time in years, and was hit with a lot of emotions at once. It's always comforting to be back in places I spent a lot of time in as a small child, but at the same time it's impossible to ignore how much changes when you're not there to see it. I'm not someone who likes to stay in one place for a long time, so returning back to old memories is particularly strange for me.

Sharing in hobbies and learning skills from one another sounds really wonderful! It's one of the things I've enjoyed most about posting my writing here and making writer friends! It's also nice to be able to fully dedicate your time to developing your skills instead of having to share the time between other responsibilities.

I wish you the best of luck on your exams, hang in there! Exam season is tough, but I'm rooting for you! I hope you get to go back to your grandmother's this summer and relive at least some of those happy childhood memories.

[angeltreasure]

Cecilia here, how are you doing? I talked with my Priest who's also my spiritual help person, he seemed to think that I should visit the sisters I went to late last month again once I have enough time off work to do so. I agree with him, I'll contact them again here soon if they don't get back to me after this week. The vocation director is a busy woman after all, and there were a lot of women at the retreat recently, like 50-75 at least. I also broke the news to my mom finally about discerning. It went better than expected, she's just confused more than against it, she was not surprised though since I've thought about religious life before and had tried to tell her. Her biggest hangup is that she might not get grandkids if I don't get married since my brother made it very clear he doesn't want kids. She kept making jokes about the Sound of Music musical saying once I'm a novice I can find a rich widower with like 7 kids and then marry him. I appreciate that it's off my chest with her, but I don't know how to broach the subject with my brother, he's now an atheist in a band out of state in a relationship with a trans woman saying he's nonbinary himself. So I'm not really sure how to tell him I'm wanting to go into religious life. Pray for my family please to come to the faith once more and that they will find it in their hearts to let me explore God's call, along with the repose of my Grandaunt and Granduncle since they passed away last week, we're going to their funeral on Monday both of them were uber Catholic, 101 and 97 respectively. God Bless.

Hello Cecilia!,

I’ll pray for you and all of those intentions! I’ve been good. I am hanging in there. I haven’t told my dad or anyone on my dad’s side yet. I wanted to on Divine Mercy Sunday but something in me said wait. My mom’s side pretty much knows. My mom is for it, and my brothers question if it’s really something I want, while some aunts don’t believe it.

Our bishop just lifted all remaining rules that coronavirus made for our diocese, so I was thrilled when I saw we could have the Precious Blood in Mass!… it will take much prayer. We have a huge parish that keeps growing more and more, it will take at least 80 new volunteers of Extraordinary Ministers of Holy Communion just for the blood alone to cover all of our Masses! Please pray for us that people eagerly come forward.

On May 27 I’m making my first visit to the cloister I took a ride to, just for meeting up to ask questions. They didn’t offer any overnights yet but we’ll see! The non-cloister also got in touch with me this week, so after their super busy tour of the Eucharistic Miracles displays, they will be reaching out to me one on one from across the country. I still wait for replies from the other two but I look forward to any reply with hope.

My first Rosary with my new materials was better than the Rosary making class! It did fall apart a couple of times, but my I managed to fix it. I presented it to my mom for her birthday because every day she prayers the Rosary…she has so many! One of my aunts wants me to make her one so that’s today’s little project which I’ll take pictures of. Afterwards, I’ll be making them for the poor. All I need is to assemble them and buy larger bags to place them in along with a print out of how to pray the Rosary. I have so many materials, it’s been quite exciting to plan some designs in my head.

I was Lector 1 today at Mass. My pastor gave every ministry tips/training notes. Ours was having a good pause at the end of our reading before saying “The Word of the Lord….”, and he also wants us to dress more modestly this summer. I’m excited for that, so I’ll be shopping around for cardigans and such to cover up more and be more like our lady. I have a ton of veils to mix and match. I’ll have to study next week’s readings too.

[dorefasolsido]

43. Omg it's been a while

10 HOW’S

How did you get one of your scars?

Two years ago I was rollerskating with my sister and a tiny rock got stuck in my wheels, so I basically flew forward and slid headfirst into some debris. Luckily, I have plenty of experience falling on rollerskates, so there was no significant damage, but my elbows were hella scraped. So I still have a scar on one of them.

How did you celebrate your last birthday?

I didn't do anything for my birthday, really. I wasn't feeling it anyway, and one friend was celebrating her move to Germany on that day with a picnic, so I just went to that instead. But I am planning to do something for this one! I haven't received any presents in two years lol

How are you feeling at this moment?

Pretty good right now! I finished all my work for this month, so I can take a bit of a break, and thank god for that.

How did your night go last night?

Well I was working my ass off until like 1:30 AM lol. It's not that I had to, but inspiration hit hard, and I couldn't let it go to waste.

How did you do in high school?

Pretty well in the academic sense, that was never too difficult for me. Very poorly in the social sense, though I did have some friends, only one of which I am still in touch with today.

How did you get the shirt you’re wearing?

I think my mum bought it for me ages ago, it's probably from my high school days.

How often do you see your best friend?

I saw her last in 2018 since we live in different countries, and lots of things came up in the meantime that prevented us from visiting each other. I want to do that soon, though.

How much money did you spend last month?

I feel like I was more thrifty in June? Aside from the Scandinavian trip I paid for, I think I tried to contain myself a bit.

How old do you want to be when you get married?

I don't want to get married.

How old will you be at your next birthday?

I'll be 29 very soon.

9 WHAT’S

What is the most important part of your life?

Hmm, my family and my writing. I do a lot of the latter, but mostly not for myself, which is something I want to change.

What did you do last weekend?

I was working throughout the weekend (the joy of end of the month deadlines), and aside from that, nothing special. For the past week I barely even left my house because I am on a socializing break, and it's been so wonderful.

What did you last cry over?

I don't really remember tbh. But I must have cried recently because June is somehow always such a bad month for me. So I was in a pretty gloomy mood before I went on my socializing break. But that has been really healing.

What are you worried about?

About the book translation deadline lol. I'm not even halfway through, and they already asked me when I am going to deliver it. At the same time, though, I can't force myself to work on it now.

What is your mother’s name?

I'm too paranoid to answer that.

What always makes you feel better when you’re upset?

Run BTS or any BTS content really, driving around aimlessly while blasting music, those awful sweaty dance cardio workouts. And like, renewing my hair colour.

What would you rather be doing?

Right now, nothing. I'm happy I finally got to do this, since I either wasn't in the mood or was too busy for months.

What’s the most important thing you look for in a significant other?

I guess what would be the most important is just understanding and respecting each other. Everything else can fall into place if those two things are there.

What did you have for breakfast?

Nothing.

EIGHT HAVE YOU’S

Have you ever done something outrageously dumb?

Oh for sure. Just recently I've texted someone I know I absolutely should have no contact with. But eh, so far so good.

Have you ever had sex on the beach?

Nope.

Have you ever been backstabbed by a friend?

I don't think I've ever been outright backstabbed, but I've had moments when I realized, yeah, this person is not my friend.

Have you ever been out of the country?

Yup.

Have you ever dated someone younger than you?

Nope.

Have you ever liked someone who already had somebody?

Well yeah, I sometimes get these platonic crushes on taken people lol. I would never do anything about it, and I genuinely think it happens because I know they are unavailable and therefore are "safe".

Have you ever been brokenhearted?

Sure have.

Have you ever read an entire book in one day?

Oh yeah, Stephen King's Carrie just last year. It's a short book and it hooked me right in, I spent the whole day in my room just reading.

SEVEN WHO’S:

Who is the last person you saw?

My sister.

Who is the last person that you texted?

My best friend.

Who called you last?

My dad, I think? But I missed the call, and he talked to my sister instead.

Who is the last person you hung out with?

Aside from my sister and grandma, no one in particular in almost two weeks. But I've had more than enough hanging out at the beginning of June.

Who did you hug last?

No idea, maybe my parents when I came home?

Who is the last person that texted you?

My best friend.

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to?

Oh I have no idea, I don't say that very often.

SIX WHERE’S:

Where does your best friend live?

In Lithuania.

Where is your favorite place to be?

Depends, but right now, I enjoy nothing more than being right here in my childhood home alone.

Where did you sleep last night?

My bed.

Where did you last hang out?

Two weeks ago I met two of my friends at one lake in Belgrade.

Where do/did you go to school?

Elementary and high school in my hometown, university in Belgrade.

Where did you last adventure to?

Well, I did quite a bit of mountain climbing at the beginning of June.

FIVE DO’S/DOES

Do you ever wish you were someone else?

Yup, quite often. Not because I hate my life or anything (well, most of the time lol), but because I would like to experience how it is to be, I don't know, a famous singer, or an astronaut, or an explorer, or all these other things. I can't do all that in this one life, I've chosen my path and I don't regret it, but still, it would be cool to have all these other experiences.

Do you think anyone despises you?

I'm not really sure. I don't think anyone full-on despises me, but I can think of at least one person who might dislike me. Yet, at the same time, she does like texting once in a while.

Do you like someone right now?

Nope.

Does the future scare you?

Eh, sometimes. It depends, sometimes I feel like I can take on anything, and sometimes I have no idea how I'll make it past 30.

Do you have any secret powers?

Not that I am aware of.

FOUR WHY’S:

Why are you best friends with your best friend(s)?

We've been there for each other through good and bad, it's easy to talk to her about anything, and we are both very different but also match really well.

Why did your parents give you the name you have?

I have no idea lol. I think my dad wanted to name me after my grandpa if I was a boy, my mum was against it, but it didn't matter anyway, because I turned out to be a girl. I mean, Mila can be seen as a shorter version of my grandpa's name, soooo, maybe that's why?

Why did you get a myspace?

I actually never had it lol.

Why are you doing this survey?

This looked fun! I like surveys that have some kind of a theme or a special style or something like that.

THREE IF’S:

If you could have one super power what would it be?

Teleportation because ho boy, I could spend a 15-minute break literally anywhere in the world.

If you could go back in time and change one thing, would you?

I wouldn't after all.

If you could live anywhere, where would it be?

Germany (probably Berlin) or maybe Lisbon. Japan is high up on my list of countries I want to visit, but since I haven't gone there yet, I can't say if I'd like to live there.

TWO WOULD-YOU-EVER’S:

Would you ever shave your head to save someone you love?

Yeah, why not. I mean, hair seems like a small price to pay for someone's life.

Would you ever get back together with any of your exes if they asked you?

Hopefully not.

LAST ONE:

Are you happy with how your life has turned out?

I'm okay with it

[evsvolunteerstotem]

New year, new things

27.01.2024

Šťastný nový rok!

- Okay, to be honest, this saying comes a bit late haha but I mean it's been more than a month since I last posted here. And since then there was a turn of the year and now we're already here in 2024. Of course, at the end of last year, many things were happening too but I'll keep the topic of Christmas and New Year's Eve short, otherwise, it would get out of hand before I could even shed light on the current month.;D

To sum it up: I enjoyed a very nice Christmas holiday with my family, had the chance to see many of my friends again and to name some events - I was in the theatre, went partying, watched a movie in the cinema, went bowling and celebrated New Year's Eve together with my friends. I was pottering with my sister, enjoyed a movie night as well as going on lots of coffee dates with my girls and that's not even all…

My holidays at home were wonderful and I'm so happy that I took the chance to meet so many people again but therefore it was also busier than expected and there was definitely not enough time to relax completely. That's also what I felt when I came back to Plzeň and has probably been the reason for me to become ill right on my first day of work. :/ Gladly I only needed a bit of rest and was able to be back already the following day. The first conversations were very nice and I felt the energy everyone had for the new year. It felt good to be back in a routine and to have some order in my everyday life again.

Nevertheless, I had the feeling that it was time for some change. I mean - new year, new resolutions and new motivation to try something different, right? That's why I had some "first times" in January… Let's start with the cultural part of my life.;) This month I visited the Great Theatre in Plzeň for the first time and watched a performance of "The Nutcracker" together with my colleague Lenka. I'm not exaggerating when I tell you that this was one of the best theatre visits I've had in my life so far. The costumes, the ballet performance, the stage design, the live orchestra together with the choir and the mix of original pieces with modern and humorous parts - everything was just right and I felt more than entertained during that evening. The Great Theatre itself is beautifully detailed as well as quite impressive and of course, our tickets for the next show at the beginning of February as well as in April have already been booked and I'm looking forward to being there again soon.

I also felt extremely motivated for sports in the new year. Even though I had already been active here before and had mainly done home workouts and short runs, I also wanted to try something new. So, on the one hand, I spontaneously bought some really good running shoes to motivate myself a little more to jog aaaand I also completed my first volleyball training here last week! :D This was honestly a really spontaneous thing. I played this sport for about 1 year, when I was younger and after that almost every summer at the beach or sometimes in school and I still love the combination of playing in a team and moving my body in various ways. So I thought to myself "Why not starting again? – but I think one thing that has stopped me a bit so far was the fact that this team sport also lives from communication and I was not sure if I would find one club in Plzeň where English conversation was possible too. But then I just surfed the Internet and it didn't take me long to find this cool club named "Beach Service" that offers beach volleyball training for young people as well as adults. After a short email exchange and phone call with all the information I needed, I had my first training session. It was definitely tough but enjoyable at the same time and it's so nice how the coaches always explain to me everything in English again. I'm motivated to continue with the sport and of course, I'll let you know if they already send me to the Olympics this year. ;D

This month I also met Isabelle, the new German volunteer of "Tandem", another organization here in Plzeň. Our energy matched right away and we quickly realized that we had a lot in common. At our second meeting Isabelle and I went to the cinema before we had dinner at the "Pivstro" (the best Burger place in Plzeň :D) and took a nightcap at one of my favourites - "Café Regner". We talked so much and when I arrived home I only saw the message from Isabelle saying "I just realized that we spent 6 hours together!!" - and I also thought how crazy it is that time flies by when you feel comfortable around somebody because that was exactly what I experienced with her. :)

There is also some news at work. Besides the tasks I've already had before I started a new little project outside of TOTEM. Every Tuesday I go to a school for one to two hours and join the English lesson for children between 9 and 11 years. I remember, how excited they have been and how overwhelmed I was when I first visited them. It was something completely new for me as the children of course were very energetic and boisterous- the opposite of the seniors I work with. But I've got used to it and they are also not as agitated as at our first meeting but always happy to see me haha. And I'm very happy to meet them too, because everyone is so unique and lovely and at the same time it's nice to have some more variety at work right now.

But I want to be honest with you, besides all the good and exciting things that happen, I'm not super happy all the time. I can remember how it took me a few days to get used to being here again, to have a routine again, and sometimes things at work don't go as planned and I have the feeling that I could do better. For example in the conversational lessons, when I create a video for the TOTEM YouTube channel, or during my Czech lessons when I have the perception that I should be much better in the language so far. But in those moments I often tell myself to not concentrate on the negative thoughts I have or mistakes I make but rather to focus on the good things and on the positive feedback I get. In those moments I try to be proud of everything I've not only achieved but also learned so far. I want to make my time here enjoyable and unforgettable and therefore I want to look back at my year without thinking about the negative situations but with a smile on my face and the thought that everything happened for a reason and that I'm glad for all the experiences I was able to make. :)

Picture of the snowy landscape on my way home

Santa Claus comes to visit on Christmas Eve ;D

With my girls on New Year's Eve <3

Back in Plzeň in the beautiful Great Theatre

Inauguration of my new running shoes :D

Sunset at my favourite place at the Kamený rybník

Coffee date with Isabelle;)

The most beautiful sunrise I have ever seen <3

Next month is going to be very exciting and busy and I'm already looking forward to it.

Stay tuned and see you in February Laila:)

[ms-demeanor]

Professors who use Canvas or any other canvas/blackboard/whatever online tool to post assignment sheets and accept work come to rely on the tool instead of writing a syllabus.

"Well it's in the modules"

Cool do you have visibility on for all of the modules from the start of the semester? That is definitely worse than just having one schedule to write things down from but I can work with it.

Or do you only reveal the modules a few days before they start, so the first week you have week one and two available? Because that means that I can only plan out one week in advance, which is not enough time for me to know whether I'll be okay to go to my hobby meetup on the first friday of next month or if I'll have a major assignment due at midnight that day. Was I planning on using a weekend six weeks into the semester to go visit my sister? Too bad because after I've paid for plane tickets I found out that you scheduled a project that I need specific equipment for to be due on that Sunday.

Also: you are a college professor. You shouldn't keep your modules hidden because you should allow your students to work ahead.

"But they might do things poorly, or in a way that I don't want them to." Well warn them about that and then let them fall on their face if they have to. They ARE adults and they can figure out whether they'll be able to work ahead successfully or will cope with the results if they fuck up. But if you hide the assignments and they just experience your class as something that happens to them, not something they can plan for and anticipate and prepare for, everyone is going to have a bad time.

When I was getting my bachelor's degree there was some kind of administrative screwup and I ended up not taking a 200-level critical theory class until my last semester of undergrad. It was a prereq for a lot of classes and mandatory to graduate but it just slipped under the radar.

The professor assigned us a $300 literary theory textbook and said "you're going to need this for the rest of your time in college, so it's important to invest in this book" (for the record, it was not - I almost never referenced foundational literary theory papers in my college career, and after 200 level was never instructed to write any paper through a specific critical lens) but the rest of my time in college was the ten weeks of that class. I did not need to buy a $300 ($200 used) book on literary theory.

But the professor had given us a syllabus. And the syllabus included a VERY complete assignment schedule, including the page numbers of all the readings for the semester, which included lots of standalone essays that we had institutional access to AND the 70 or so pages assigned from the $300 textbook.

So I packed up my nice camera and I reserved a room in the library and I took the reference copy of the book that the library had and I took photos of every page that was assigned; when I got home I assembled the readings into PDFs that I labelled with the date that the reading was due.

That quarter I was taking five classes and planning my wedding. I got married a week after graduation. Five classes on a quarter system schedule meant that I was taking 21 units. I was working full time, and I had recently fractured two vertebrae and occasionally missed class because I couldn't stand upright and walk on campus.

The ONLY way I survived that quarter was by sitting down after the first week of classes and taking four hours to write out every single assignment, reading, group project, and exam date in a schedule that I carried with me constantly and referenced obsessively.

If I had had just one professor that quarter who hadn't provided me with a schedule of assignments it could have very well tanked my performance in all of my classes and delayed graduation.

I hear plenty of professors complaining online about students these days, but I can hardly blame students these days being checked out when so many professors these days are checked out as well.

Sometimes college professors like to hop on my posts lamenting the sorry state of syllabi these days and joke about how they haven't thought that far ahead in the course themselves, or talk about how they struggle to complete a schedule for their students.

With all due respect, that's your job. If you can't do your job, you should have a different job. If you need help, ask your colleagues or your department chair or *someone* because I know that professors aren't given a hell of a lot of education on how to educate, so you probably *need* help.

But every single time I make one of those posts I get anywhere from ten to thirty messages, replies, reblogs, and asks say "oh man, that's exactly why I had to drop out of school; I couldn't keep up with the assignments because I didn't know when they were due until the week they were due."

I have been a college student in three separate decades, and "not having a schedule of assignments in the syllabus" is new to my experience. That shit didn't fly in the 2000s or 2010s and I think it likely has to do with professors being overly reliant on apps.

AT A MINIMUM your syllabus should have:

Contact information (including preferred method of contact) for the professor

Office Hours

Grading Policy

Assignment schedule.

Your assignment schedule doesn't necessarily need to have the exact page numbers of every reading or a full assignment sheet for each project, but it should have things like:

December 1st - Major Project 3 second draft due December 9th - Quiz 10 December 12th - Major Project 3 final draft due December 15th - Final Exam

If you end up presenting a more thorough schedule with readings and homework later, that is acceptable to present a week or two into the semester but it is absolutely insane to me that students these days don't know what homework they're going to have to get done over Thanksgiving break during the first couple weeks of class.

If I had three professors at once who didn't give me a schedule, how on earth would I know if I was going to have to read three chapters of a novel, take a midterm and turn in two stats homework assignments, and complete a history research paper the same week that I'm planning to travel to see family? If I'm aware of this from the beginning of the semester I can make sure not to pick up extra shifts, or I can plan to leave a day later to accommodate the midterm, or I can start working on the paper early to complete it before the due date but if I don't know what's going to be due when, I'm going to have a big problem.

If you don't give your students a schedule you are communicating that you don't care about their schedule, and that you think it's their responsibility to contort their life (and their job, and their other classes) around your class, and honestly my advice to students in that situation is "drop in the first week and pick up another class". That's actually part of why I recommend signing up for one more class than you can really manage - if you get a professor whose class looks like it's going to be a disaster because they don't have a schedule, you can bail before the withdrawal period and get a refund for the class.

I'm only in one class this semester but the professor's response has fully dropped me into "Fuck it, I guess I'll fail" mode and I don't even know if I can pull myself out of my current D grade because I don't know how many assignments we have left in the semester.

This is a shitty way to run a class. If you can't do better than this, you shouldn't be running a class.

[purplesurveys]

1785

Do you know a James? I have a second cousin named James! He lives in New Zealand, though, and only visits home every few years. I first met him when he was a few weeks old, then the next time he was already like 10. I haven't seen him again since and I'm guessing he'll be in college or whatever the third time they come back to the Philippines.

Have you ever been to Australia? If not, would you like to? I haven't and I'd love to, but tbh it's also not really at the top of my list. I'm not really sure what I'd want to see/experience there.

Have you ever been diagnosed with a mental illness? Haven't been diagnosed but I'm sure I have one or two hanging out in my head lol.

If you had to choose to have a different accent than the one you have now, what accent would you choose and why? Idk, I'm fine with the accent I have.

New York or California? New York, easily.

Have you ever or do you currently live in a Gated Community? I do and always have.

Who was your last text from? An incredibly late automated OTP that I don't even need anymore.

Do you know how to use a DSLR camera? Yes, I owned one as a teenager. Tumblr made photography this super hip hipster thing in the early 2010s lol and it made me beg my dad to get me a DSLR camera, even though I didn't have a clue how to use one. Long story short I found photography boring and I ultimately passed the camera to my sister, who ended up as the one into arts.

If you had to choose one instrument to perfect, what instrument would you choose? Piano.

Have you ever owned an Axolotl? Nope.

What has been the longest amount of time you’ve spent on a plane? Bali was around 4 hours. As much as I'd love to travel the rest of the world, those 20+ hour flights PLUS LAYOVERS sound dreadful.

How often do you use Snapchat? Whoa. I haven't used Snapchat since college, around 2017ish. I remember Angela and I trying to bring it back when the pandemic had *just* started but it didn't catch on.

What does your last text say? It's just an automated message that sent me an OTP.

Have you ever played Habbo? I saw the ads like a million times but never played it.

What about Runescape? Nope.

Have you ever heard of the band Mumford & Sons? If yes, do you like their music? I have, but I've never heard anything of theirs.

Have you ever kissed anyone starting with the letter A, C, N, T or K? No.

Have you ever used Valium before? I have not.

What time is it where you’re from? 11:39 PM.

Have you ever adopted an animal from an animal shelter? Yes, Arlee was from PAWS.

Where do you usually find Surveys from? On my dash. I used to look for surveys on Bzoink, but there was a period this year where I couldn't take surveys for a couple of weeks and by the time I came back there were tons of new, interesting ones on my dash. Ever since then I've always just been playing catch-up on my feed and I haven't opened Bzoink in months now.

Australia or New Zealand? Tbh I'd rather save the money lolol I honestly don't know which one to pick and I don't find either worth the visa hassle. I guess if anything uh New Zealand? then go to the spots BTS visited from Bon Voyage hah.

Have you ever missed a flight? Never.

What is your best friend’s middle name? I'm not sharing that.

How do you feel about the passing of Aretha Franklin? I was shocked, but it didn't affect me heavily.

Did you enjoy any of her music? Can't say I was a passionate fan of her music. It's just not something I was regularly exposed to so I've been largely unfamiliar for the most part.

What is your favourite film from your childhood? Toy Story and it's still my favorite kids' movie.

Kanye West or Drake? If we're doing brutal honesty I'd go with Kanye but all the shit he's said and done equally cancels him out, so I'll go with Drake by default lol.

Do you know anyone who is named after a state? I used to work with a girl named Jersey, if that counts.

What was the reason for your previous doctor’s visit? Shots for a dog bite.

Have you ever been to an outdoor cinema? Nope. Too hot and too many flies LOL.

Have you ever had a “bad trip”? If yes, what happened? Idk if this even counts as one because I blacked out so quickly it was almost embarrassing, but what happened was I took a big puff of that cannabis vape thing after already having downed a ton of alcohol and the next thing I knew I was on my knees in the restroom and then finally carried back to my bed.

How often do you use Instagram? Everyday. I post at least one story a day; my in-feed posts are few and far between though and I only do posts if something super significant happens.

Have you ever smoked a cigarette? Yeah, a few times. It's not something I look for and I haven't done it since before the pandemic.

If so, do you still smoke? Nopes.

What are you up to tomorrow? It's my last working day before our office closes down for the holidays so while I'll be at work I'll be in a pretty damn jolly mood hahaha.

What type of questions do you like being asked during a survey? I like random questions that require more thought. It can be boring encountering what-color-is-your-blahblah all the time, and it also turns me away if questions are too hypothetical/philosophical.

Adam Sandler or Jim Carrey? Adam Sandler.

What is your favourite Ben Stiller movie? I don't have one.

What is your favourite Spotify playlist if you have one? I made a playlist called 'it's raining purple' which are essentially BTS tracks I think are perfect for when it's raining and I open my windows to let the colder air in.

Outside of playlists I've made, I have two favorites – one called 'the tannies love you' which compiles all of BTS' fan songs; and 'standing next to you' which is an SNTY-focused playlist mixed in with a bunch of Michael Jackson songs.

Firefox or Chrome? Chrome.

Do you enjoy learning about conspiracy theories? They're fun to read, yeah! You don't have to believe them; they're just stories to spice up what we already know hahaha. I was obsessed with the Avril Lavigne doppelganger case for a time.

If so, what is your favourite? ^ Oh, well that one.

Do you find hand tattoos attractive on your preferred sex? Depends on the tattoo design/style.

If you had a baby boy, what would you name him? I've always been indecisive about a main name, but I'd love for their second name to be Owen after Owen Hart.

What is your favourite Netflix original series? Is Black Mirror considered one? Let's go with that.

Have you ever owned a Tamagotchi? No, too expensive. I had bootleg ones which were just as fun :)

Do you have a favourite “survey blog” on Tumblr? If so, who? I like everyone! :) Would you rather be 10 minutes late or 20 minutes early? Depends on the situation. If it's a super super super big event with like 1,000 people and my presence doesn't matter, I'd honestly much rather be late. Otherwise I'm always early.

If you could be a member of any TV-Sitcom family, which would it be? Perfect Strangers. Would love to finally be fluent in Myposian.

Tell me about the 6th person in your contact list: College orgmate and ultimately became part of the same friend group in college. Haven't seen her in years. Terrific writer, loves cats, unfortunately shares the exact same music taste as my ex so I always shudder when she shares her song recos. Has curly hair, lives in the south, remains to be one of the few people genuinely interested in journalism and I respect her for that. Great sense of style. I miss Blanch!

Are you waiting for a text back right now? Nope.

Would you rather be able to control fire or water? Water.

[unadulteratedkr]

2, 9, 19 for the end of year asks?

#2: Album of the year?

I mean. Come on. We all know. Tell you what, I'll count down from 3 and we'll all say it together, 3-2-1: UNREAL UNEARTH, yeah I knew you'd know.

Listen, that willowy tree trunk of an Irishman reached inside my brain and yanked out a hyperfixation on an entire ALBUM the likes of which I haven't experienced in AGES. Like, genuinely? I think the last time I fixated on a single album like this, it was when I wore out my Wicked CD back in high school.

#9: Best month for you this year?

Oooo, you know what, that'll have to be July of this year. A very beloved friend of mine stayed with me a couple of times this year, and in July she was back with me for like... three weeks? And it was just really fucking beautiful to have that company and do the things we ended up doing together. We went to see Carly Rae Jepsen and Boygenius, we took my sister to see Barbie, we tailgated the Taylor Swift concert, we ate good food, we got drunk and honest on the floor of my kitchen.... it was just really really lovely, and those memories keep me warm when I'm having a blue day.

I live on my own, so I can get lonely sometimes, and having my friend here with me was a soothing balm on that loneliness that just...it defies any of the words I've got in me to have been able to experience that.

#19: What’re you excited about for next year?

I have a train journey planned for the spring!!! I'm taking the Coast Starlight down to visit with some folks, and I'm really excited!!!

I also am working really hard to leave one of my current jobs, so hopefully that'll be something I get to be excited about in the coming year too.

End of Year asks (come distract me as I edit a fic!!!!)

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #176

Do you think you could handle a job in the medical field? Why or why not? No. I could never handle a patient dying, and there's also a lot of gross stuff I don't want to see.

What is one electronic device you own that you have not used in a long time? A Nintendo DS Lite.

Do you prefer to play chess or checkers? I only know how to play checkers.

If you had to go an entire week without using any technology, what do you think you would spend most of your time doing instead? Reading, drawing, writing, probably exercising extra. I'm sure I'd be way, way more productive...

Would you rather travel to Asia or France? Asia, I think.

Do you prefer dark, brown or white chocolate? My preference is milk chocolate, but I also do enjoy dark. There are very few cases where I've liked white chocolate, it's too sweet.

Would you rather visit Australia, Germany, Croatia, or Jamaica? I fully intend to visit Germany at least once.

Would you prefer a pet rat, mouse, snake, lizard or spider? If I could only pick one to have period, snake. At this moment though, like what I most want to add to my family now, is a tarantula, either a Brazilian black or skeleton leg.

Have you ever fallen into a hole or crevice whilst hiking? I've never even been hiking.

A romantic meal, a trip to a theme park, or go to a concert? In general I'd prefer to go to a concert as a date, however Girt actually doesn't enjoy concerts so I wouldn't drag him to one. With him, I'll take the theme park, when my legs are a-okay.

How often do you wear necklaces? Basically never because all the ones I have start to bother my skin really quick/turn it greenish. I want a necklace I can keep on so bad, I really love how they look. If I'm putting any of my necklaces on now, it's for going out somewhere.

Would you rather wear a bracelet or a necklace? Necklaces, I actually don't like bracelets for the same reason I don't like long-sleeved shirts that thin out/get stretchy at the ends (I know that is so specific and you probably have no idea what I'm talking about), I don't at all like feeling something tight-ish around my wrists. I'm the same about pants that only reach my ankles.

When was the last time you had a donut? Maybe like, a month ago. Or more.

What’s your favorite song by Miley Cyrus? I genuinely do love "The Climb."

Who do you absolutely adore? My boyfriend and his immediate family, my own mom, nieces and nephew, Mazzy, and Tez. I care about more people, but as far as "adore" goes, it's them.

Have you ever had a crush on a kinda-country boy? lol no, I don't think I've ever been romantically attracted to a notably "country" guy.

Do you care about any of your exes at all? I care most about Jason, but no longer in a romantic sort of way. Of course I still feel some amount of softness towards Sara, but I can't truthfully say I "care" about her anymore. I just have nostalgia with her.

Who last slapped your butt? Probably my friend Chelsea, we used to be really close when I was still friends with her sister, and we were sexually playful with each other in a completely "just joking" kind of way, neither of us actually felt anything romantic. She's married with a kid now.

Where have you lived throughout your life? The same general area of eastern North Carolina, near the coastal plain/Piedmont divide.

What kind of cake did you have for your last birthday? I actually didn't want a cake, we got donuts instead.

Have you ever had a panic attack? Many. I'm more prone to anxiety attacks, but panic attacks have definitely happened.

Anyone’s birthday coming up soon? Yes, my mom's at the start of next month and my nephew's in the middle of August.

When at a restaurant, do you put your napkin on your lap? I probably would if it was messy food.

Do you prefer electric or manual pencil sharpeners? Electric.

Are your biceps at all noticeable? lol no

When are you moving next? I don't know. It's looking to be very possible that our landlord will be selling this house and getting us into another somehow, things are very uncertain right now, and if that doesn't happen it will probably be whenever Girt and I hopefully move in together.

Have you ever had a bad concert experience? No.

Have you ever carried a concealed weapon? No.

Do you call your boyfriend “Monkey”? I've seen this question appear in so many surveys over all the years and I have never understood why, I know literally nobody who does this.

Would you rather go to Greece or France? Greece.

How would you spend a day at the beach? At this moment I wouldn't go to the beach, not until my legs are stronger; the last time I visited the beach, my muscle atrophy was kinda early on, and I struggled VERY BADLY walking in the sand. While great progress has been made, I just don't think I'm ready to where I'd be able to enjoy the experience. But anyway, to answer the question in general, I tend to stay in the water; I hate the feeling of sand but love being in the ocean. I'm sure we'd bring a tent thing for shade, so I'd probably sit under that with the people I'm with, maybe have some snacks or read. I'd definitely bring my camera to try to get some nice pictures. Hopefully one day soon I CAN go on a vacation like this and not be in torment lol.

Have you ever experienced altitude sickness? No. Like everyone though I've definitely experienced the ear popping in planes and even when driving through mountains.

Was the last show you watched a re-run? Not for me, no; Ma and I were watching Deadliest Catch, some of the first season. She's seen it at some point.

What’s your biggest priority right now? Improving my physical health, I think. I've gotten too far to let it start slipping again.

What does it feel like to fall asleep in someone’s arms? If I'm not hot, I absolutely love it. In the spooning sense anyway lol, if we're PROPERLY lying down so we're actually comfortable, I am such a cuddlebug. If I'm sitting up in some way, then I'm uncomfortable/am gonna wake up feeling like death lol.

Do you recall the first time that you learned the truth about sex? 5th grade, sex ed/"family life" classes. I feel like a rare exception where my parents actually never taught me about this stuff, so my education on it was very aggressively abstinence-based and made HIV/AIDS sound like a total death sentence that you'd contract from your very first pre-marital intercourse. I am very unhappy with how I was taught about my own body parts and men's, like there is still probably so much stuff I don't know and it's honestly pretty embarrassing.

Do you need the opinion of others to make yourself feel worthwhile? uh... admittedly, right now, yes. I am very, very bad about needing external validation, because otherwise I'm convinced I'm an awful person who shouldn't treasure herself. This is a very major problem with me that I'm still trying to fix.

Have you ever rubbed anyone’s feet? ugh ew no, I hate feet

What is one thing you fantasize or daydream about doing? Being able to support myself with nature photography, going all over the world seeing amazing things...

What would you rather: lethal injection, electric chair, or hanging? Lethal injection sounds by far the least painful... I'd think. I guess I don't know exactly what the body experiences during these.

Have you taken someone's virginity? No.

What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? I'd be pretty fucking pissed off, especially when one of his relationship dealbreakers is cheating, so wouldn't that be ironic. I'd break up with him immediately and probably stop talking to him. Wow I don't like this question, even when I have full trust in him to never do this.

Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do? lmfao yes he's very aware

Why did you kiss the last person you kissed? He was leaving to go home.

Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today? No.

Who would you like to see in concert? Rammstein is fucking obviously #1 lol, even before I was super super into them I woulda gone because their concerts are very highly praised. I'd also really like to go with my mom to a Metallica concert (she would fucking die), as well as In This Moment, who she also likes a whole lot. I would include Ozzy here, but he seems to be done touring and probably should be with his health state. There are plenty of other bands I'd go see, I really like concerts, but those are the immediate, strong answers for me.

Who was the first person to ever ask you out? I think one of the boys that harassed me in pre-k, but honestly I don't even know if we knew what "asking out" was yet, there were just two boys who would chase and try to kiss me during recess.

What's one thing your partner must be able to accept about you? Sometimes I need time to myself, and also that I'm a mentally ill person that is not always going to be in happy shape.

Are there any videos of yourself on YouTube? No, not to my memory. Certainly not on my current account.

What’s one thing that’s annoying you about the book you’re reading now? It doesn't majorly annoy me, but Sutherland has a very strong habit of overusing separating paragraphs for emphasis, in my opinion. She's slightly more dramatic than I prefer in reading.

Do you have trouble letting friends go when you need to? YUP SURE FUCKIN DO

If you had a daughter, would you allow sleepovers? I'm going to guess you're implying her sleeping over with a boy, because obviously I'd allow her female friends to????? I probably would allow sleepovers with a boy she's actually dating only once she hits 16; I know what I did at 16 with my boyfriend, and I was abstinent then, I'm not inviting my teenage daughter to get pregnant if we can avoid it. I also include the fact they'd better be actually, officially dating because I'd likely wring a fucker's neck if he tried to lead my daughter on by never committing.

Which do you like better, your first name or your middle name? My first, I'm thankful I actually like my first name lol. My middle name is pretty imo, but it is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO common.

Where is your brother? He lives in Tennessee, but I actually don't think he's there right now; he's been traveling the country doing track races in I think he's aiming for every state.

Do you like using terms of endearment? Yes, I am extremely verbally affectionate.

Do you have any plans for tomorrow? Yeah, Girt's gonna be coming over.

What's the longest movie you've ever seen? I THINK Troy, but I'm unsure. I don't generally like super long movies, by like around two hours I'm done.

What was the last thing you wrote down in the notes app on your phone? I have one list of drawing ideas, and I added something to that.

Would you ever want to visit South Korea? Nah, I'm not particularly interested.