#I'd still prefer this over sweating and being uncomfortable in the summer

[wolfchans]

I'm sounding like a cold weather hater but I'm not!! I love cold weathers but my body doesn't seem to agree 😂

[2chopsticks2eyes]

Don't Play Dumb

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

Pairing: Lee Minho/Lee Know x Han Jisung/Han x Fem Reader

Themes: Shameless smut

Word Count: ~3.3k | AO3

Warnings: Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Alcohol, Cussing, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Vaginal Fingering, Blow Jobs, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Vaginal Sex

Summary: Minho and Jisung were living their best lives to their gayest potential. Well, at least that's what they thought before you moved in next door...

Author’s Note: This story was inspired by a request from my girl @lyramundana. I had to physically restrain myself from making this, like, 20 pages more than it is just because I told myself this was only going to be a short one-shot to put out there while I write my main stories. 😅

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Jisung always knew he was gay, he was vibing too much babygirl energy to be otherwise. Minho always knew he wasn't attracted to really anyone, however, he always had a thing for a nice set of pecs and a nice, perky ass. That is until he met Jisung and realized his 100% attraction towards the man. And the biggest plus was Jisung had a really nice ass AND pecs. Like. DAMN.

But I digress. Neither believed in love at first sight until they first locked eyes on each other. 

That was YEARS ago, and they were still as in love (if not more) as they were before.

But then one hot summer day, you moved into the flat straight across from theirs.

The two were just coming home from a romantic brunch and were already a couple of horny dogs before noon even hit. However, when they saw you struggling to move in by yourself, all it took was one look at each other and they immediately rushed over to help you despite your ramblings that you could do it yourself and weren't some damsel in distress.

They respected that, but still insisted on helping if not to speed up the process so you wouldn't turn into ashes in the summer heat and, if you were being honest with yourself, it sounded particularly preferable. So after brief introductions, the three of you set to work.

So, after these two Greek gods of men finished helping you move everything up, all of you were drenched in sweat from head to toe.

"I'd offer you something to drink, but I think I only have tap water..." You explained meekly, trying not to focus too hard on each drop of sweat that ran down their tanned skin.

They were in a similar situation.

They had watched you lift those heavy boxes like they weighed nothing and they soon found out that you were more than capable to do this yourself. But with the sun blazing and heavy lifting up two flights of stairs, they couldn't help but notice your... attributes.

You had worn just a thin tank top and some breezy shorts due to the weather, and the more sweaty you got, the more they clung to you, and the more the boys couldn't help but have their eyes wander.

They giggled and reject your offer. "Do you want to come and have a drink at our place instead?" Jisung offered sweetly.

"No no no! It's totally fine! I have to start unpacking anyway and, besides, you two have helped me out plenty today..." They couldn't help but notice the blush blooming on your cheeks as you looked down with a small smile, biting your lip to contain your shyness.

Minho wanted to coo at you for being so damned cute, but he was afraid that it would make you uncomfortable, so he refrained. 

Once Minho and Jisung returned to their own flat, Jisung turned to Minho. "Okay hyung, I know this is going to sound super weird, but was she not absolutely drop-dead gorgeous or what?!" 

"Holy shit, I know right?! Am glad I'm not the only one who noticed!" 

"Like, shit, I'd fuck her stupid if I wasn't the gayest bottom bitch there is out there!" They laughed heartily and Minho playfully swat his arm with a loud cackle.

This was why they loved each other so much, they could be completely open and honest with each other and they knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that they’d still live and die for each other.

"Speaking of bottom bitch, I believe we had some plans once we returned home if I'm not mistaken?" Minho gave Jisung a wry smile as he moved closer to place a sweet kiss on the edge of the younger man’s jaw, instantly reminding Jisung how stupidly horny he was.

Instead of answering, Jisung just decided to strip naked and get on all fours for the man right in the middle of their fucking living room carpet.

Weeks went by and, what started as simple greetings as you occasionally passed them coming and going, turned into the three of you spending time at each other's places every week for the designated 'movies and margaritas' nights.

"Okayokayokay, Ji! Truth or dare?" You questioned the round-faced man. After your third round of drinks, you all had foregone your attention to the movie on the screen in favor of playing the classic game for drunks.

"Truth..."

"Don't be such a pussy, Sungie!" Minho complained loudly.

Jisung shoved his face in front of the elder’s line of sight in retaliation. "Get over it! My answer remains the same!"

You giggled wildly even though the situation was not nearly as funny as you thought it was, but they had endeared expressions on their faces as they looked at you cackling like an idiot.

"Okay *ahem* Ji. Have you ever topped Minho?" You knew the question was pretty bold, but you had quickly become extremely familiar with these men. Besides, neither reacted poorly to the personal question.

"Sweetheart, hyung and I have been together for AGES. Do you seriously think we haven't already tried everything in the slutty book?"

"They have one of those?" You asked while giggling into your drink.

"Yeah, we wrote it," Minho smirked and winked at you while you cackled.

"Well, at least now I know that Ji knows how to fuck." You taunted said man with a wicked smile. 

"Oh, I can do a lot more than fucking, sweetheart," Jisung said in a sultry tone with a wink thrown at you. This was a common occurrence between you three, they would flirt with you while your heart was being suffocated knowing they were gay.

You visibly shivered with a blush and Minho narrowed his eyes, taking a mental note of it. "Okay, little miss dirty mind, your turn. Truth or dare." You could already see Minho brewing up a storm in his head, but you were never one to back down from a challenge.

"Dare. Hit me with your best shot, pussy cat." You said with a challenging grin on your face.

"Oh no. You shouldn't have said that. Minho's the devil incarnate. He'll seriously fuck you up." 

Minho answered his boyfriend with an amused hum. "Hmm, let's see..." He made a show about thinking about what he wanted to say as if he didn't already know. "I dare you..." Both you and Jisung waited with bated breath for the hell that was about to be unleashed. "...to french kiss both me and Sungie."

"WHAT?!" Both you and Jisung exclaimed in tandem.

"You heard me, bitches. You have to kiss these gay boy lips like you mean it, now pay up!"

Jisung breathed out a disbelieving laugh as his slack jaw hinted at a shocked smile. He turned to you to gauge your reaction, only to see that you had completely frozen in place. Their smiles instantly dropped. "Aw shit, I'm sorry, love. I was just teasing. If that makes you uncomfortable I can--" 

"No!!" You shouted, covering your mouth immediately afterward. "N-no! A dare's a dare! I'm no pussy..." At least that's what you told yourself.

Internally, your heart was racing at a thousand miles a minute as you scooched closer to Jisung. You took a deep breath and cupped his cheeks, watching his beautiful eyes go wide and his moist, plush lips part. Before you could doubt yourself any further, you dove in and planted your lips on his.

You had instantly melted as Jisung tentatively placed his hands on your waist and you furthered the instructed 'french kiss' by tangling tongues with him.

After a moment, without waiting to check their reactions, you pulled away and lunged at Minho to do the same, drinking in the taste of the alcohol on his lips. When you felt his strong hands smooth over your shirt and around to your back you slightly whimpered.

You flew back while covering your mouth and saw their wide eyes and dumbfounded looks on their faces. "Oh-oh, my god!" You scrambled to stand up. "Shit guys, I'm so sorry. I..." You couldn't stay with the humiliation any longer and, without another word, you fled from the apartment.

Jisung and Minho looked at each other with equally shocked expressions. "Are you as turned on right now as I am?" Jisung said breathily. And Minho just dumbly nodded. "Do you think she would... or would you be down for...?" There was an unspoken question there, but his soulmate already knew.

"Fuck yes." Minho threw himself on his boyfriend like a hungry wolf and proceeded to fuck him over the back of the couch until he came with a cry on his lips.

Okay... they were definitely, infinitesimally homosexual but... they never met someone like you…

Maybe they had some talking to do.

When they knocked on your door unannounced the following evening, you were shocked to say the least. "Minho? Jisung? What are you--?"

“Can we come in?” Jisung cut to the chase rather quickly and you could see the determination in his eyes. You nodded shyly, still not able to get over the fact that you made an ass of yourself the night prior.

As soon as they came in, they bracketed you and you looked up at them like a frightened animal. “G-guys… I-I’m sorry about yesterday… I didn’t mean to and we had a lot to drink and–”

“Do you like us?” Minho cut in this time and you sealed your lips. You felt a shiver run down your spine and, even though you were sure he meant it in a different way, you answered respectfully.

“O-of course I like you guys! We’re friends!” You sounded shocked that they even had to ask.

“No…” Jisung brazenly stepped closer and swept your hair over your shoulder to speak low into your ear. “Do you like like us?”

Minho moved closer on your other side as well, however, he bent down to eye level with you “Don’t play dumb baby girl. Do you have dirty little thoughts about me and Jisungie? Hm?” He tilted his head and you looked like a deer caught in the headlights as they both stared you down. “Do you imagine what it would be like having two men fuck you stupid? Is that why you asked Sungie that question?”

You didn’t know whether to tell the truth or lie out your ass but, eventually, you could only reply with a shy nod directed at your own bare feet, not trusting your mouth to be able to form words.

With your shameful face still directed towards the ground, you peeked up at their expressions. Your eyes widened when you saw identical Cheshire grins on each of their faces. “Well then, I think we should assist her with that. Don’t you think, hyung?”

“I agree wholeheartedly Sungie.”

You whipped your head up and stepped back a hair. “Woah woah woah! No need to stoop to that level, guys!  I’m sure I’ll get over it eventually!”

“Well, you see sweetheart, we've been thinking an awful lot about this. Hyung and I are in it for life, but with you…” Jisung said as he stepped an inch closer to you. “You’ve got us questioning what it would be like with a woman.” He gently trailed a finger down your arm, inducing goosebumps that they could blatantly see.

“We want to know what it’s like to make you fall apart. We want to see how to make you scream. Make you beg.” Minho trailed his gaze languidly over your body with each word and you felt like you were being crushed with all the tension in the air.

You involuntarily gasped when you felt Jisung’s soft lips press against your cheek. Soon enough, he was whispering in your ear. “That blush on your cheeks is really pretty, should I deepen it?” You felt the wet heat of his tongue press up against the tender skin under your ear and you quietly whimpered.

“It sounds like you are more than willing to experiment with us, honey. Tell us, baby. Do you want to play with us?” Minho wrapped an arm around your waist and began kissing your neck to drive his intentions forward. Also to inform you that “playing” didn’t mean you’re going to play fucking Jenga or some shit.

Instead of using words, you let your hands do the talking. You tentatively grasped their wrists and slowly led them further into the apartment. You made your answer clear enough when you brought them to your bedroom and turned around to silently face them at the foot of your bed.

Your eyes were glued to the floor and Minho cooed at you. When you looked up, the two gorgeous men were looming over you with hungry eyes. Unable to look directly into their intimidating eyes, you stared at your feet while saying, “I usually use the traffic light system…” You peeked up at them to make sure they understood. “I-is that alright for you guys?”

“Fuck yes…” Jisung said with an airy tone and stepped closer to grab the hem of your shirt. “Can I take this off, sweetheart?” Instead of answering, you removed said item and chucked it across the room, face getting hotter by the second.

“You guys can do whatever you want… I trust you…” You bit your lip but made sure to look them in the eyes as you said this. You wanted to make sure they knew you wanted this.

“You might be regretting saying that later, baby girl.” Minho groaned in a wicked tone.

Before you could prepare yourself, Minho had moved around behind you to hold your arms in place while Jisung stepped in front of you, slowly gliding his fingers over your exposed skin. “Shit, she’s gorgeous. Isn’t she hyung?”

Minho hummed low in his throat and then you suddenly felt his warm tongue glide up the side of your neck. “Tasty too.”

You didn’t know why, but the fact that they were talking about you like you weren’t even there turned you on even more. “Hmmm, where should I start?” Jisung rhetorically asked as he examined your body. Your breathing picked up when you felt his soft hands move up to slide one of your bra straps down. “Here?” You whimpered as his fingers glided over your nipple through the thin fabric.

You heard a chuckle come from beside your head where Minho had begun lazily kissing your neck and shoulder. “I think you have your answer, jagi. Go on, show us what a bottom bitch can do.”

Jisung bit his lip and gasped at his boyfriend’s provocative words, but when he looked back at you, he looked absolutely sinful. “Of course, hyung…” 

Jisung was an enigma. He was both equal parts submissive and domineering while Minho was a born and bred master. Created to have both you and Jisung on your knees for him with little to no effort.

They ravaged you properly. They kiss, licked, and sucked on almost every inch of your body except where you were aching the most for them. However, kissing them was almost just as good because those boys had an amazing set of lips on them.

When you all eventually stripped with an insane amount of teasing from them, Minho sat up against the headboard while you faced him on all fours, Jisung just behind you looking at your dripping cunt in awe.

Minho leaned forward to kiss you once more before leaning back and holding his oozing cock in place. “Suck.” He commanded, and you complied eagerly. As you took him in, you heard a low groan in his chest. “Sungie. Show me what you can do to her, yeah? Make her scream on my cock.” Minho said with labored breaths.

You weren’t able to see him, but you felt chills wrack your body when you felt the man behind you blow his hot air on your folds. You whimpered but continued on your mission to suck the life out of the man in front of you. You felt gentle fingers glide through your hair and felt Minho slowly begin to guide your head to bob on his dick.

You had to stifle a moan when you felt Jisung drag his tongue over the entire length of your pussy and then heard the smacking of his lips. “Wow, that’s a lot better than I imagined.” You squeaked when you felt a finger plunge inside you, pumping a few times before pulling it out and holding it up to Minho’s lips. “Hyung, taste her.”

You looked up at him from an awkward angle, not allowing your mouth to release him for a single moment. You whined when you watched his tongue slide over the digit before sucking it into his mouth. “Hmmm such a pretty and tasty girl, aren’t you?” 

You felt his hips slightly buck up but you refrained from gagging, instead, doubling your efforts. It was right as he let his head fall back against the headboard that you felt more fingers enter you, thrusting and moving in you at an unforgiving pace until you came violently and unexpectedly. 

When you pulled off of Minho’s cock to cry out your ecstasy, they watched you wide-eyed and hungry before you desperately fumbled for the bedside drawer to pull out a couple of condoms. “P-please fuck me… I need you inside me, Ji.”

Both of the men muttered expletives before you wrapped your mouth around Minho again and Jisung hastily opened the condom wrapper. You saw stars when you finally felt him enter you. “F-fuck, hyung…” Jisung whined as he bent over you to kiss him. “She’s so tight…”

“Fuck her real good, jagi. Open her wide for me.”

And without further ado, Jisung did just that. He grasped your hips and roughly slammed his cock inside you until he was whimpering with every breath. When he had fucked you long and proper, you came once again and Jisung was at his breaking point. “F-fuck… can I cum on you, sweet thing?” Jisung asked while smoothing his hand over your dewy back.

You released Minho’s dick, although he was also close, and you replied. “Fuck you guys can cum anywhere you like if you can fuck me this well.”

With an airy chuckle, Minho flipped you over onto your back and hovered over you. He and Jisung had traded spots so now Minho had on a condom, poised at your soaked entrance, while Jisung stood next to the bed with his now bare cock aimed at your face.

They didn’t pause for a single moment, Minho ramming you full force, devouring your neck as you quickly pumped Jisung’s cock in time with his boyfriend's thrusts next to you. It almost felt like fate when all three of you came in tandem and you held your mouth open to catch every drop of seed that Jisung had to offer you. 

Then, as if all the life was drained from the room, you all collapsed.

You all laid there in the mess for a moment to catch your breaths before they made a move. They were proper gentlemen, cleaning you and handling you with care as they tucked you in bed. “Guys?” They smiled at you with their full attention. 

“What is it, beautiful?” Jisung as he laced his fingers with yours.

“I know we need to talk and all, but can you guys just stay tonight and talk later?” You looked at them with pleading eyes and they smiled in adoration before plunging under the covers on each side of you. 

Yeah, Jisung and Minho knew they were gay, but after that day, they could confidently say they weren’t opposed to the opportunity when it was you they were considering…

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If you’ve made it this far, thank you so much for reading! This is why it takes me so long to write my stories! I always want to make it into a fucking full-length book! Let me know how you liked it!

Please like, follow, and share! Thanks baby stays! 😘

2chopsticks2eyes - Masterlist

[the0ldmann]

Headcannon time! (I'm sorry, I never know if it's one word or two-)

(Reminder that ''Something's Wrong with Sunny Day Jack" is an adult only fandom- minors and ageless blogs will be blocked on sight!)

I was just thinking about the 4 seasons earlier- some coworkers were talking about their favourites and why they were their favourites. So naturally, when I was on my own again, I had to wonder if *any* of our boys had favourites. Because nothing gets me through a rough workday better than thinking about these guys- *ahem*

Yes that's right though- *any* of them. I know I've typically only written stuff for the most beloved of clowns, but this seemed easy enough an exercise I thought I'd give it a go for all of them. So without further ado, here we go!

Joeseph:

Winter. He wanted to say summer, he really did. But with all the painful memories of school being out, having to deal with his "home life" (that let's remember was bad enough he ran away), and then struggling in the summer heat while undoubtedly homeless for a bit after having run away... It seems he was in the southern continental United States in the 80s during this point in his life. Winter wouldn't have been too ungodly cold at the time, so that might have been fairly okay to deal with. But summer? Summer heat would have still been unbearable even then. Not to mention if he had to dumpster dive for food, it would all rot quicker, and excessive sweating from the heat would have made him stink... Winter time meant school, and therefore getting away from 'home.' It also meant an ever so slightly more comfortable temperature-wise time while stuck on the streets (though I'm sure it still sucked, the heat of summer makes things 10x worse and so winter at least would bring mild relief in that regard). Once he gets the acting gig, starts turning his life around, and starts making friends, then there's also the holidays to contend with. Sure, the stress on family is painful I imagine. But if he had some genuinely good friends like some of his cast mates (other than Jean) seem to be? I inagine they might have invited him over for a friend get-together. Or they'd visit him where he's staying and bring a casserole and maybe a rotisserie chicken. They'd look out for him. And you can't tell me that wouldn't make the holiday season just a little more enjoyable for him. (Oh gods now I'm thinking about an impromptu friends-giving with all the cast members at like, a hotel Joeseph is staying at, I can't, who's cutting onions-)

Jean:

Autumn. Hear me out- he strikes me as pretentious af. A chunk of the content I see for him seems to have the fandom agree. Definitely full of himself with that ego he seems to carry around. So I'm going to go out on a limb and say that spring, summer, and winter try to, in his mind, hinder his perfect appearance/environment and so he hates them. You can't tell me he likes being uncomfortable, literally everything we know about him screams "if I'm not comfy 100% of the time I'm going to make it everyone's problem." Winter is too cold for him. Dressing trailer? No no no, he wants a room in the studio itself- a trailer would be far too cold. He'd shiver nonstop, ruin the makeup, and he just doesn't seem like the type to enjoy wearing fifty layers to keep warm. Summer is too hot. He's sweating everything off. While he may seem like someone to take pride in the way he looks, I imagine he only likes to do that in his own time, preferable at a pool, and not because he's sweat through the third costume since noon and has had to strip down yet again. Not to mention heat does tend to make people more aggressive... Spring? Too wet. He absolutely likes to keep himself looking perfectly styled, and the drowned rat look rain gives is not desireable to him. Spring is well known for its rain after all. So all that leaves is autumn! Temperate weather, not a whole lot of rain, gentle breezes, and some great fashions are fall perfect. He was wearing a turtleneck sweater in the one picture, wasn't he? Turtlenecks- perfect for fall weather and perfect for looking sharply dressed but also somewhat casual at the same time. That's it. He cares way too much about his appearance.

Shaun:

Autumn. He's absolutely an autumn fan. How could he not be? The weather is getting cooler so it's perfect for sweaters and cuddles. Spooky month (October) is in autumn and we all know he's a big horror fan. It's also the start of the holiday season, and for someone so willing to go out of his way to help and even just spend time with those he cares about? Regardless of what other autumn holidays besides Halloween he may or may not celebrate, you can't tell me he wouldn't take advantage to spend more time with those he cares about.

Jack:

All of them. No no, I literally mean it. Sure it may seem like a cop-out, but do you really think he could actually pick a favourite? One he likes more than the others? You would think summer would be his favourite- the clearest skies for the sunniest days are in summer and lords know Sunny Day is in the man's name... But I genuinely think he's such a positive and brighter-side-of-things kinda guy that he would say he loves them all.

Summer? Perfect for camping, going to the beach, enjoying ice cream for two but sharing one spoon...

Spring? The start of new life! Flowers are in bloom, animals are making babies (and whether or not he could make babies with you, he certainly wouldn't mind an excuse for the exercise), and the spring rains really do carry a freshness to them that rain during the rest of the year just does not have.

Autumn? Starting to get cooler, so it's perfect for bundling you up, especially in his jacket. Get cozy on the hillside as you stargaze at night...

Winter? (Assuming there will be snow.) Better like curling up under a blanket with him by the fireplace! Only after a long day of building a snowman with him, or after having enjoyed a lovely carriage ride through the park. Plus with numerous holidays coming up (pick your flavor), why wouldn't he want to spend as much time as possible with those he cares about? If its a holiday with any sort of gift giving or special foods/baked goods, surely you wouldn't go without gifting him a plate of his favourite chocolate chip cookies, would you?

Ian:

Spring. No, I wasn't influenced by the bunny costume. ... Okay I absolutely was. But I can still justify this! He seems like, if Jean is his dad like I've seen some people theorize, then I imagine he'd take after dislike of being uncomfortable and so that would rule out summer and winter. He also only has one childhood friend, so school had to be relatively rough to deal with. He had someone to hang with over the summer at least, but autumn is the start of school season. Therefore, autumn is the start of dealing with school bullies again. Spring would herald a soon-to-be end to the school season, with decent temps, and considering the fact he's a weeb- cherry blossom season. Again, spring is also the season of new beginnings. While we don't know when Ian and MC move in the game, spring almost seems like the perfect time for it to happen. Right after graduating, get away from toxic family as quickly as possible, and all the symbolism with them starting a new chapter... It just fits. And if Jean is his dad, spring could be viewed the opposite of his, while also being quite similar in a way- similar temps being the most obvious similarity.

Nick:

Summer. He is an influencer after all. What better season for doing all the fun things and showing them off, but the good ol' summer season? Water parks, camping trips, outlet malls, visits to the dog park, beach visits, museum trips, vacationing to other places in general... Also, it's so hot out, it's the perfect excuse to go to your fav local froyo place and try asking out the cutie behind the counter!

(I do not codone this behaviour of Nick's btw, please don't ask out people while they're at work, it's uncomfy af-)

Bonus Barry:

(Yeah I'm adding Barry for the all of probably three people that simp for him here.)

Summer. It's probably his favourite but not for the most obvious of reasons. Of course his business of frozen treats will be booming during the hottest season of the year- raking in the dough and boosting his ego for being "such a good manager to keep the ship running so smooth during such a busy time!" But if Sauce wasn't totally joking around when they said Barry had "never forgotten about you" in that ominous looking text... Well, what better season than summer to make your favourite worker sweat and squirm under your gaze? What better time than summer to leave them panting and breathless with your incessant phone calls demanding attention unpaid overtime that leaves them too exhausted to utter a word in protest? Plus, bodies rot and decay faster in the heat...

(okay but for real I hate Barry, I've had mamagers like Barry, I hope he gets some comeuppance be it either death or getting demoted or just having to do our job in our stead- and btw watching a manager like that get forced by their supervisor to come help you in a rush and have to ask you what to do and take direction from you? Good gods it happened to me once but it was worth the world to me heeheeheeheehee-)

(Holy shit this was long af- way longer than I intended, whoops! Hope ya'll enjoyed though! Also hope the formatting is okay as soon as I hit post cause I did this all on mobile-)