#I'd go hug trees with him ngl

[crystalmonk5579]

Haii totally not a suspicious blog post for my bestie @ninjapaste >:3c

Bazhagen/Duke Wyatt

A/n: NONE OF THESE ARE CANNON BESIDES THE EAR WIGGLES AND THE EAR PETS OK?! I'm literally just doing this bc Robyn is asleep and I don't wanna bother them lol anyways let's begin!!!

~~o⁠(⁠(⁠*⁠^⁠▽⁠^⁠*⁠)⁠)⁠o haiiiiio⁠(⁠(⁠*⁠^⁠▽⁠^⁠*⁠)⁠)⁠o~~

Bazhagen:

Ok, pets fucking start off with the obvious, his ears are sensitive. Like not really sensitive where it could be painful, but like, lil tingles when you touch em.

His bf Lucian(my oc) will pet his ears sometimes

This mofo can get jealous as easily as a fly and flap it's wings. Like Lucian could be talking to someone from Durmitch and if they do ONE WRONG THING IT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING DEATH GLARE FOR THE REST OF THE COVO

Very into pda but I feel like that's a given bc of his out going natured personality

This man will constantly tease Lucian Abt anything so be fucking careful when you're around baz, he will never stop reminding you of embarrassing things. Like you guys could be talking and he could call you kale teeth in reference to when you were talking to your crush and you had a piece of kale in-between your teeth.

Doesn't trust wild animals in Durmitch for three reasons, 1.) They're probably dangerous 2.) They could be used as listening devices for some magical people! And 3.) Lucian might adopt them and they're gonna steal his bfs attention away from him >:(

Honestly, I think he might be really fucking good at rock climbing for some reason...

This man is willing to pick up his small 5' bf and just smother him with kisses in public, no holds back all out, just to either scare someone off or just to show he loves his bf sm

Willing to just show up unannounced and bring you gifts if he ever senses you are sad one singular bit. "Heyyy, I saw you were acting not like yourself, and really really sad for whatever reason so I bought out an entire bakery with my friends money, you wanna watch the real elf house wives?"

HEAVY ASS SLEEPER ISTG IT WILL TAKE A FUCKING MILLION MAN MARCHING BAND TO WAKE HIM UP A LIL BIT/hj

I think he might really be into soda or root ear floats in a modern au

I think he might also really like axe throwing too, both as practice for fighting and competition!

This man's hair is so so so fucking rough and jaggy like look at it, it looks like a susuwatari from studio Ghibli movies except they're all greased up and spiked to make him look cool

I don't think he actually likes the leather pants he wears, like they're very restrictive and not good for fighting, not to mention it must fucking itch badly since I'd assume Durmitch woods are kinda like rainforests. And we all know that leather pants + humid/wet rainy areas= ITCHY ITCHY!!!!/neg but eh, who gives a shit!?! He looks cool in em

Cry baby when he gets a cold "OUGHHHHH LUCIAN WHY MUST YOU ABANDON MEEEEE?!!?!?" "....babe you have a mild cold, you'll be fine in a couple of days" "*sniffling and sobbing* WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO MEEEEEEEE?!?!?!?"

Duke Wyatt:

His hair is so fucking soft istg, it looks so fluffy and soft and nice to touch

I bet he smells like dandelions and tree sap from the woods

Modern day au I think this man would have a skincare routine ngl

I think if he could I would actually be really really good at drawing!!! Like omfg I bet his penmanship from song wriitng

Man will sometimes unconsciously death grip Lucian while he's cuddling him by accident

Would slightly die inside if his favorite patisserie would go out of business and he couldn't get his almost croissants anymore

This man gives like the bestest hugs ever istg, they're tight and soft at the same time and theyre long but not too long that they over stay their welcome

Honestly....he'd slay in a summer dress, LIKE ESPECIALLY THOSE DAINTY WHITE ONES WITH SUNFLOWER PRINTS THAT GO SO WELL WITH A SUN HAT

Very very good at dexterity shit with his hands bc of wood carving, speaking of hands!

Very calloused and gritty on the sides bc of accidently nicking himself while making flutes and other wooden things, carrying logs, wood cutting etc etc

HE IS A FUCKING HEATER WHEN JT COMES TO CUDDLING, HE IS PERFECT FOR EXTRA COLD WINTER NIGHTS

(Modern au)Hates and I mean HATES SCARY AND GORY MOVIES WITH ALL HIS HEART

Actually more of a cat person than a dog person, as much as he gives off golden retriever bf vibes tho, they're just a lot calmer and more nice to be around...and they won't chew up his flutes!!!

(modern au) any movie relating to animals dying like a dogs purpose, Marley and me, etc etc. They make him go through all the stages of grief for a 5 day period.

He really really likes flannels too!!

That's it for now y'all!!! Have a nice day/night/evening!!

~~(⁠づ⁠｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡⁠)⁠づ byeeeeeee ⊂⁠(⁠・⁠▽⁠・⁠⊂⁠)~~

[defiant-firefly]

Oh yeah fun fact about those escape room games me and my mum have been playing: they make no fucking sense. Not in a 'we can't solve them' way, they're actually fairly easy (for me anyway but I think that's cause mum gets bored) but because the protagonist is a detective with stupid reasoning sometimes.

Mostly saying this because she got shot at and kidnapped (by the guy wearing the keffiyeh so like... yeah that's not helping her case here), ended up in a cabin in the woods, found this guy's camera in his backpack, and said one of the photos on it was suspicious. Two of the three photos were pretty sus. First one is of the protagonist and her friend (I think) investigating the disappearance of a woman at the petrol station from the previous chapter. It's from an angle that makes you think he was just camping out in the fucking trees to take this photo, so yeah that's a bit weird. The second is of the missing woman sitting on a bench reading a paper, taken from within the bushes. Pretty sus, right?

But it's the third one that gets logged as vital evidence. That's the one that makes the protag think there's more than one kidnapped woman here. Clearly, super important! So what was it?

A wedding photo. The culprit's wedding photo with a blond woman hugging him. She's wearing a flower crown that's part of a puzzle, but otherwise, that's it.

The protag thinks a wedding photo is more suspicious than a photo of a woman taken from within the bushes. The Arabic man can't have married a conventionally attractive woman! No villain like this has ever been married before! No no no that's just not right! She must have been kidnapped too and coerced into this! How cruel! /s obviously

Like. Come on. They could at least have made the woman look even remotely like she didn't want to be there if they were going for this. They're not even trying to be subtle about this.

The REAL fucked up thing about this man should be that to get into the attic, he has to pull down the mounted animal heads on the wall in the right order. And he had a fucking lightbulb in a draw that only opens when the guns in the rack are in the right places. And he didn't notice the distinct lack of boards over tha attic window when he pulled up outside. And his number plate combined with a fishing bait catalogue is the security pin for the basement door that unlocks from the inside where the victims are.

The more fucked up guy is the fisherman who locked his car jack behind a number code box. And the protagonist for spending like an hour solving puzzles to put out an engine fire rather than get the fisherman out the fucking car before it explodes.

The culprit is actually cool btw. He has a fucking secret cave behind a waterfall as a secret spot to hang out in after he kills someone. A secret cave!!! Behind a waterfall!!! With a comfy hammock in it!!! And he's trying to kill this dumb fuck protag!!! Sure he might be a murderer but I'd forgive him if he kills this racist, judgemental idiot that has to spend forever organising the box of donuts before she can take one, and locks her office phone inside a locked draw you can only open with the key from a safe, where the code is the amount of squares on the files in the cabinets she also has to organise before she can use them.

Like damn bitch, you live like this?

I get it's an escape room puzzle game, but like. There are some things that maybe just make your characters look insane if you make them puzzles ngl

[paleangels13]

I HAVE ARRIVED WITH HANNES. the main point you gotta know is that he's just a lil tree hugger dude. but like literally. he just talks about peace and loving everyone and humans helping each other and how all creatures are made from the same cosmic energy and we're all just part of nature like he is The Hippie and it's cute 🤲🖤

:D very happy you did!

First of all thanks 🖤 second of all...i love the phrasing ✨lil tree hugger dude✨ that sound fucking cute like this :D

And it's funny because if you had just send these pics I would have been like "okay, gotta say that dude looks like a hippie in half of them...is he??" Also! His smile is very cute 🥺🤲🏻

Anyways, thanks again ^^ now I have cute pics that might not help me *that* much for the setting of my idea but still give me a much better picture of him than I had before soo maybe I'll simply shape my idea a bit according to this new info ☺️

[hypnosisbuttd]

Day 8: Forest

(This edit kinda suck ngl but here it is anyways)

They say not to go into the forest alone, and for good reason. The forest is by far one of the most mystical places on earth. With such a variety of flora and fauna, no one can predict what lies in the forest. Yet so many people decide to wander in anyways, and most of them end up never being seen again. These next two boys will learn this lesson very well. Following a soldier boy and his crush, a farm boy whose feelings are returned, wander into a forest as part of their latest challenge. However, the forest will not let them leave…

“Alright Campers! Here's Today's Challenge!” Chris declares starting his explanation.

“In this forest is a rare marshmallow from the beginning of Total Drama that was never eaten. You and 1 other person will work together to search this forest for the marshmallow. The first two to bring the marshmallow back to the starting line, wins!”

“Ok but who is this 1 other person exactly?” Zoey asks.

“The duos in question are… Mike and Lightning.”

“Sha yeah! Let's go, my dude!” Lightning cheers.

“Zoey and Dakota”

“I’m looking forward to working with you Dakota…” Zoey smiles.

“Ugh… Whatever…” Dakota groans.

“Cameron and Sam!”

“We got this dude!” Sam says fistbumping Cameron.

“Hell yeah we do!” Cameron fists bump him back.

“And finally… Brick and Scott!”

The two boys stare at each other.

“Lets hope you aren't too useless Sergeant…” Brick mumbles.

“Pfft… More likely you're gonna be left in my tracks…” Scott scoffs.

Internally however

Look at his little serious face! He's so cute! Scott coos in his mind.

Such confidence! Scott’s so cool and hot! Nyah Brick thinks, the nyah was probably unnecessary though.

“Alright enough standing around… get inside!” Chris complains

The duos run into the forest to begin looking for the marshmallow. Scott and Brick look somewhere deep in the dark part of the woods. The two of them don't notice, however, a strange pink mist falling over their area.

Should I ask him out now? It is just the two of us… Scott thinks.

Come on Brick! You've got this! Just tell him how you feel, the worst he can say is no! Brick pep talks himself.

“Ey soldier boy, I got something to ask ya.” Scott says.

“I similarly have something to ask you, soldier.” Brick says walking towards Scott.

The two of them take a deep breath.

“So I know this sounds strange but…” Scott starts

“You might not feel the same, But I'd still like to ask…” Brick mumbles.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?!” They both ask simultaneously.

The two of them stand shocked in the middle of the woods at each other's responses, both of their faces as red as tomatoes.

“Wait so you're saying…” Brick whispers…

“Holy shit..” Scott grins.

“Oh my god, yes!!!” Brick says, wrapping his arms around Scotts torso.

Scott returns the hug, squeezing him as tight as possible. Then, Scott gently lifts Brick's face to his own and kisses him tenderly. The two boys gently and lovingly kissing each other, the world fading around them. Finally they remove their lips and Brick gently rests his head against Scotts chest, and the two boys cuddle in their solitude.

Of course, if that's all this was, it wouldn't be a good Hypno story, would it?

Just as Scott was ready to let go of his new boyfriend, Brick begins mewling quietly while humping his leg against Scott.

“You doing ok, dude?” Scott asks

“So… Good… Mrrrrrrr…” Brick whimpers.

“Dude, are you sick or something? Do I need to get med stuff?” Scott asks concerned.

“No… I need… you…” Brick says looking up at Scott.

Scott's face heats up. “Dude I like you too but maybe we shouldn't do this on the first-” Scott cuts off as some sort of mystical force enters his brain.

All other functions such as talking are shut down, leaving only the primal urge to mate. Scott growls and pins Brick against a tree. Brick looks fearful for a second, before he sees Scott tugging on the edge of his trousers. From there, Brick smiles and removes his shirt, while Scott does the same. The two then proceed to furiously make out, all the meanwhile their human memories fade and their primal urge grows stronger.

Brick then breaks the kiss with Scott and pulls his pants down, revealing his relatively small cock, but his huge bubble butt. Scott grunts and pulls his pants off, revealing his much flatter ass, but comparatively enormous dick. Brick says nothing as he turns around and pins himself against the tree. Scott wastes no time grabbing Brick by the shoulder and furiously breeding him. Brick moans and purrs like an animal in heat, which at this point he may as well be. Scott refuses to slow down, and goes faster and faster, pounding any remaining brains and resistance out of Brick's head. Brick feels himself about to blow his load, and just before he does, he howls into the forest, as Scott howls with him. WIth a final load blown from both boys, the two collapse against the tree and rest.

When they awaken, they look at each other strangely. They seem to have forgotten how to talk, or rather, everything about themselves. Thankfully, Brick still remembers his Alpha, Scott and cuddles up against him. Scott runs his hand through Brick's now messy hair and kisses him lightly on the forehead. Standing up and stretching, Scott helps his new mate and the two of them wander into the deep part of the woods together, never to be seen again.