#I’ve seen everything a million times and I’m so stupidly in love w someone that’s in a relationship and I know deep down they won’t break up

[bixy]

lowkey trying to get a job in IT got me fucked up… this software company is hiring data center techs but you’d have to relocate to Madison, WI and I’m almost considering it, because every IT job here requires a BA and like minimum 2 years of experience, multiple IT certifications and all have like, 300+ people applying for the position and sometimes it feels impossible to break into :/

[versegm]

It starts, as many things do, with a letter.

White paper, messy handwriting. Folded in half in a small envelope and slipped under her door.

Of course, the letter itself doesn’t matter so much as the words written on it.

“A love note?” Nitocris raises both eyebrows in surprise. “Who is it from?”

“It wasn’t signed.” Ereshkigal answers. “But it was, uh. Quite generous in compliments.”

“As it should be. You’re a queen, after all.” Nitocris nods to herself. Ereskigal wishes she had the same confidence as her-

“Hey, girls!” A preppy voice rises from the door. “How y’all doing?”

“Great! Just great!” Ereshkigal hurriedly answers. She turns around with a wild smile, eager to change the subject. She can’t let them know she can’t let them know “How about you, Astolfo?”

*

Ereshkigal doesn’t know who the writer of these letters are. She does know, however, who she’d like them to be.

Because the thing about Astolfo, is-

“You’re staring again. Do I have something on my face?”

they’re handsome. 

Pretty. Beautiful. Asu-shu-namir shaped Ereskigal’s taste in people for her whole life, sue her. She can’t help feeling weak before this smooth skin, this perfect hair, this high-pitched voice. She can’t help feeling weak before these strong arms, this broad chest, this sharp jaw. 

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“The Underworld? Yeah, I’ve been there once! Not Kur, obviously. The one I went to was neat, though. It was fun.”

they’re soothing. 

There’s something about them, the unmistakable mark of the Underworld, just below their skin. Not like the undead. It’s much closer to her or Nitocris. Someone with ties to down there, even back when they were alive.

Ereshkigal loves the Overworld, and loves living beings. But she can’t deny that they’re a little… overwhelming. A bit of familiarity is, welcome.

(“Aw, thanks! You feel the same, actually! A fellow Moon-dweller.”

“I… never went there, though?”

“It might just be that you don’t remember. The Moon is where everything lost lies. People can end there too, when they’re lost or forgotten. It’s hard work getting them back down.”)

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Oh, do you need help with that? Here, let me!”

they’re kind. 

Overwhelmingly so. They get into trouble more often than not, and many think it’s because they love chaos, (which, to be fair, they do,) but Ereshkigal knows better. Astolfo cannot see someone and not help them. They’re very similar to the Master, in that way. A complete disregard for their own safety in the face of a troubled face.

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Ah, almost forgot myself here. Sorry!”

they’re so considerate. 

Ereshkigal isn’t… good, with touch. She’s working on it! But the sheer warmth- the pressure- the knowledge that someone is touching her, the queen of Kur, mistress of the dead, willingly touching her-

it’s. A Lot.

Astolfo is nothing but touch. Always hugging others, always patting a shoulder, holding a hand, elbowing rips. That’s their default way of showing affection. 

And you’d think it’d be a problem, you’d think there’d be friction, but-

Astolfo… doesn’t touch Ereshkigal.

Oh, they want to, that much is obvious. Often, they reach out for her. Often, they raise their hands, to pat or hold or pet.

But they always stop themself, inches away from her skin.

She knows it has to be really counterintuitive to them. And she knows it must be hard for them to remember not to touch her everytime. (It’s hard for Astolfo to remember a lot of things.) Yet they try. Yet they do. For her. For her comfort. And when they forget, they apologize, always, always.

It’s been a couple months, and Ereshkigal has now worked her way to simple touches. Yet Astolfo rarely ever initiates. They wait for her to touch them, and even then, she can see how much they scrutinize her when they reciprocate, ready to back down at the first hint of discomfort.

For her. All of this, they do it for her.

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Huh. I don’t really get it, but you’re welcome!”

they’re not scared.

Of anything, in general. But most importantly, of her. Ereshkigal, goddess of death. Ereshkigal, chaotic evil. Ereshkigal, ruler of mesopotamian Hell.

They’ve never even flinched. From the first day they’ve seen her.

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“You… remembered what I said? You actually listen when I talk?”

they’re so, so deeply lonely.

Well. No. Lonely isn’t the right word. Astolfo has quite a lot of friends. They’re a social butterfly, always jumping from newcomer to veteran servant, chatting up even the Chaldea staff.

But there’s… something, like a gap, between Astolfo and others. It’s in the way they laugh Astolfo off as a naive idiot. It’s in the way they get frustrated when Astolfo forgets things.

And it makes Ereshkigal angry, so angry, that righteous fury that make gods tremble. 

Because they don’t get it. Because they don’t try to get it. Because sometimes Astolfo talks about one thing or another, and pauses, and then apologizes, as if their thoughts were a bother, as if they were a bother. Because whenever she mentions something Astolfo talked about in the past, they get surprised- always, always, without fail.

Because Astolfo is so good, so kind, a ray of sunshine barely dressed in flesh. Because Astolfo deserves so many things, because Astolfo is so important, and they’re convinced that they’re nothing but a side character.

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Hey, check out that new card game Nobu gave me! Wanna play?”

(Fingers trembling over the door frame. Stiff shoulders. Forced smile. It’s subtle, but it’s there. It’s subtle, but something’s wrong.)

they trust her.

She hadn’t known what to do, that night. Something had clearly been… off, about Astolfo. But she’s never been the social one; they were. The best she could do- the best she did- was humor them. Play, and talk, and fill in the silences. (Sometimes, she hears people joke about wishing Astolfo would speak a little less. She wonders if they know. How downright disturbing it is to witness Astolfo being quiet.)

Her bed is small, and touch is difficult, but she’d tried really, really hard, and their back had been burning hot and impossibly broad against her own, but for them she’d endured it. She’d wished she could have hugged them, back then.

Astolfo hadn’t complained. As she’d drifted off to sleep, she swears she’s heard the softest “thank you.”

The next day, they’d been back to normal.

(She’d checked the calendar, afterwards. That night had been a new moon.)

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Hey, look! I made you a plushie of Hippo-kun!”

“This nail polish looks SO good on you. Give me your other hand!”

“Hey! I found these flowers earlier, and I thought of you!”

they’re her friend. They’re her dear, important friend.

And Ereshkigal is in love with them.

(In her opinion, they’re an easy person to fall in love with.)

*

Because the thing about Astolfo is-

“Oh, hey! Great timing!”

that they’re standing right in front of her door.

“Here, take this!” They hand her something. “And I’m off. Have a nice day!”

A small envelope. It contains, Ereshkigal is sure, a white paper folded in half, filled with messy handwriting.

She can feel her face heating up.

“W-wait! You don’t get to just leave!”

“Huh? Why? Do you need me for something?” They tilt their head. Genuinely confused.

“This is a love letter!”

“Indeed it is!” They nod, pleased with themself. “I worked hard on these, I hope it shows.”

“... But why?”

And now they’re back to confused. “... Because I’m trying to court you? I thought it was pretty obvious.”

“...” Ereshkigal stands here. Dumbstruck. Because they just said it. Because Ereshkigal never, in a million years, thought this’d be a possibility. That anyone- yet alone the person she herself fancies- might actually reciprocate. Because they make it sound so simple. Because they make it sound so obvious.��

“I… the letters weren’t signed.” She says stupidly.

“...” Astolfo blinks. “Oh. It genuinely didn’t occur to me to.” They chuckle sheepishly. “My bad.”

My bad.

And it’s such an Astolfo thing to say, Ereshkigal can’t help but laugh, too.

“I should have known it was you.” (Couldn’t believe it could be them)”... Do you mean them? The things you wrote?”

There are a few seconds of silence. Astolfo looks at her, as if wondering how to best answer, and she can feel dread starting to gather in her throat and-

Astolfo suddenly gets on one knee, like a knight.

“Ereshkigal.” They sound solemn all the sudden, with that tone they use when they’re trying really hard to focus. They raise a hand, and, gently, seize just the tip of her fingers, and they’re so warm, warm, warm, “You’re one of the gentlest souls I’ve ever known. You’re pretty, and strong, and kind, and.” 

A pause.

Then, really quietly.

“You listen. People don’t usually listen.”

(That loneliness with no name, this gap with no words.)

Slowly, so that she can pull away at any time, Astolfo raises her hand, and softly kisses the back of her fingers. For a few seconds, Ereshkigal forgets to even breathe.

“So, yes. I meant everything I wrote. And if you’ll allow me, I have plenty more praises I’d like to write about you in the future.”

They tilt her hands on the side, and their lips are on her wrist, and their eyes are on her, and there’s a look on their face, something like adoration, something like worship. A knight bowing before their queen.

Love.

“So, will you?”

“What?” Her face feels so hot there must be steam coming out of her ears.

“Allow me to write more to you?” They run a thumb over her knuckles. “I will stop, if you want me to.”

(Always. Always. If you’re comfortable. If you want me to. An inch over her skin, begging to touch her, yet stopping for her sake.)

“You could be writing to me about rocks you found on the side of the road and I’d love it.” She blurts out. And it’s true.

Astolfo laughs, with that beautiful voice of theirs that gets her head spinning everytime. (Happiness is such a good look on them.)

(They still haven’t let go of her hand.)

“See? This, right there. This is why I love you.”

[ak8shi]

Going out/clubbing with the HQ boys series: Bokuto Koutarou

Whew the things that I would let this man do to me

He is the BEST person to go out with, stick with him and you’re guaranteed a fun and adventurous night

He’s ordering rounds of shots, he’s GREAT at dancing, and he just commands attention in general

So you’re sitting in the dining hall of your uni, and this buff ass dude walks in

No hesitation whatsoever he like comes up to you and is like ,,

“Hey I think we live in the same dorm, I’m Bokuto, can I sit with you???”

Oh so he’s BOLD bold

After that, ya’ll hit it off and he just has so much energy, you’ve never met someone who can balance so much in his schedule

It honestly is so obvious to his friends that he likes you, but from your perspective you just think he’s nice to everyone

Akaashi and Kuroo, watching him stupidly grin at his phone while he’s texting you: oh to see without my eyes 🧚🏼‍♀️💗🙈✨💕

ANYWAYS, he builds up enough courage and is like would you like to go out with my friends and I?? I’ll buy all of your drinks 😉

Did I mention he’s the CEO of fake IDs, like this man had four IDs that he either bought off upperclassmen or stole as a FRESHMAN

Almost got arrested outside a bar for using one

And like how could you pass up his offer; you like his friends and you want to see what party Bo is all about

So you meet him to uber to his friend’s pre, and you’re kind of nervous

Bokuto: I’ve never seen someone so pretty😍😍😍,

Kuroo in the back seat: Stop staring at her like that with your entire Debby Ryan looking ass-

I think Bokuto would be the type to wear a loose short-sleeve dress shirt with black jeans, he knows damn well he’s FINE

At the pre, he’s automatically going for the shots while fisting a 4 Lokos LMAOO

You’re trying to keep up with him and you feel the buzz setting in FAST

Akaashi, standing behind you, whispering in your ear: U better slow down because I’m not carrying both of you home tonight sweetie 😊❤️

You spend like two hours at the pre, and you’re already having so much fun with Bo ,, he kind of makes a move and rests an arm around your waist bc he sees other dudes eyeing you :(((

Bo is dancing with you already, innocently twirling you around on the balcony of the apartment

You aren’t even sure what song is on, but it doesn’t even matter when you’re with him

You’re both pretty drunk at this point, you’re both slurring and Akaashi is ROLLING his eyes

Bo is the type to take five million snaps to post on his story and then he watches it back the next day cringing at it

Bokuto: Akaashi, w-when did I post these??

Akaashi: After you chugged the five tequila sunrises :)

Kuroo the only man who can hold his liquor is calling the uber

Bokuto lives for one thing and one thing only: L A T I N  N I G H T

You can hear the hard beat of a Bad Bunny song playing from two streets away

Once you all get into the club, Bo is snatching you up to get to the dance floor

He is screaming over the music trying to show you how to move in time with the music he’s highkey so loud that you can hear him

he’s spinning you around and guiding your swaying hips with his hand

UGH he thinks you’re so hot and he just love seeing you let go like this

He is a sight to see dancing, like you can tell he just feels the music in him, but he also tends to get overexcited

If you start grinding on him, he will die

,,, I’m laughing he probably is offbeat at first because he’s so excited that you want to dance on him like that

But then he gets into his groove and its smooth sailing from there

You play a reverse Uno card and flip him around so he’s grinding his fat ass on you LMAO he loves it and he loves the fact that you don’t care what others think when you mess around together

At one point you drag him to the bar because you feel yourself sobering up

The bar is giving out free shots though and the bartenders are standing on the bar with bottles of vodka to pour into people’s mouths

Bokuto automatically goes for it and swallows it without a chaser

His power

But then you guys actually order drinks and he orders a round of tequila shots I gagged

…..

BODY SHOTS

You have the lime and salt ready, you grin mischievously and rubbed the salt on your neck before placing the lime slice in your mouth

Bokuto is speechless he can’t believe this is happening; it feels like everything is moving in slow motion as you stand in front of him, waiting

He takes the shot, and then his tongue is on your neck to lap up the salt……. I’m simping

I’m not saying he kisses up your neck to your mouth but that’s exactly what I’m saying

He takes the lime from your mouth, giving it a good suck, and you can’t hold back anymore

You pull the lime out of him mouth and crash your lips against his

He is shocked at first to say the least, but then he’s kissing you back, the alcohol making the kiss seem intoxicating

You pull away, his hands still on your hips, “Let’s do this sober.”

He smiles at you, agreeing and leaving a bunch of kisses all over your face before pulling you away to find Kuroo and Akaashi in the crowd

They already saw you two tho LMAO

Kuroo, watching you throw back your fifth shot at the club alone: so I’ll be carrying her home in a bit

Akaashi: Fine with me,,, I will be leaving Bokuto here❤️