#I’ve called myself privileged for so long bc I depend on my family for a lot of things

[glittertimes]

Being treated like a weird crazy girl my entire life has made it so hard to actually find help to not be so weird and crazy bc I realized I just kept accepting therapists that couldn’t really help me and friendships where I felt miserable and emotionally unsafe bc I thought I was so weird and different and there wasn’t anything out there that would actually be helpful or fulfilling for me.

When I’m realizing I just needed a therapist that understood oppression and the ways that has impacted me bc a lot of my therapists have kind of judged me for being “behind” for my age like still living at home or not being able to drive - even when I was in grad school or incredibly capable in other areas of life I was still seen as a kid and that made it harder to really trust myself and feel comfortable living on my own and providing for myself.

[bunnyblooms]

OKAY FUCKER ALL THE QUESTIONS FROM THAT ASK MEME THE LGBT ONE

1. Identity and pronouns.

I'm agenderfluid and they/them pronouns. My sexuality is aroflux and asexual.

2. How did you discover your sexuality?

Pretty much at 14 was like "idk i don't relate to everyone else i don't find celebrities hot or sex remotely something i want. If i could reproduce without sex i would. Oh. I'll just call myself asexual, like a sponge!" (Which asexual is incidentally what the creators of Spongebob were going for, fun facts. Spongebob is ace rights.)

3. Have you experienced being misgendered? How do you overcome it?

Mmmm I am constantly misgendered bc I'm nonbinary and live in a binary society and the way I compartmentalize it is basically just dressing how I want and not making an attempt to pass as anything tbh. The only time I feel misgendered is when someone knows my pronouns and doesn't use them anymore tbh. So basically. Letting go of how I want to be perceived helped. I will say tho, I refuse to come out to my dad bc he won't respect it and it'll be more painful hearing him misgender me knowing how I identify, but. That's certainly a privilege I have since I'm not transitioning. (ATM at least.)

4. Who was the first person you told? How did they react?

I technically didn't come out as ace. My ex-best friend knew bc I talked about it, but neither of us knew it was an identity. So the transition upon finding the label was virtually nonexistent and all of my friends were LGBTQ as well so it wasn't stressful or shocking. It helps that around the time I discovered the label I'd met two friends who were ace and felt the same way I did. My experience with my asexuality is definitely the model that should be the norm with the community and what we as a society should aim for.

As for my gender I'd made comments in the past that I wished I could just be genderless and it really kind of sat with me when my ex-best friend came out as trans bc I was like "Oh? You don't have to be the gender you are at birth?" Belial from Angel Sanctuary was a character that resonated with me at the time, and this was right around the time I made my ace friends. It wasn't until a year later that I discovered the nb community and one friend who was genderfluid that I decided to start trying different pronouns. And basically I came out as questioning and transitioned to nb without a formal declaration, which I also feel should be the goal for society.

I was at a con with my best friend at the time who was trans and he'd come out with my now ex-best friend while they were dating. And I was really anxious bc I felt like ppl would assume I was a transtrender and shit, and my friend said something about gender and I kind of awkwadly implied I might not identify as female and he was really great about it! He was like "If you wanna talk about it or try different pronouns you can." :D

5. Describe what it was like coming out.

I pretty much did this im question 4 hehehe.

6. If you're out, how did ppl react?

I'm not out to family, that I know of. They found my facebook which has my identity listed in my about, so I'm in limbo with them where none of us talk about it so idk if they register it as an LGBTQ thing or not.

My friends were all supportive! It helps that I have like no cishet friends lmao.

I also came out to my class on TDOV two years ago for a project where we step outside our comfort zone. I'm luckily in the social work program which has social justive built into the tenants of the profession so it was pretty positive! People still misgendered me after and were more concerned with "but i'm scared of ppl getting angry at me what should i do to talk about this with them" which. 9__9 Not surprising. But there was a mom whose kid and her kid's partner are both genderfluid and bigender so it was a good experience and I had an ally which made me comfortable in sharing it in the first place.

7. What is one question you hate ppl asking about your sexuality?

Inevitably when I say I'm ace, non-aces assume I have no interest in dating which. Way to conflate being aroace with ace and ignore that there are aros and aces who want relationships. That's my biggest pet peeve.

8. Describe the style of clothing you often wear.

I wear flannels and ripped jeans or shorts mainly. I basically dress like a butch lesbian. I'll wear dresses and stuff but I do not like dressing femme and prefer to offset softer things with hard things. Like. When I wear dresses I have to wear clunky combat boots with them or have short hair or something.

9. Who are your favorite LGBTQ+ ships?

Hmmm. Depends if you mean canon or not. Canon, it's probably FigAyda from D20 and Catradora from She-ra. Shion/Nezumi from No.6 is also one of my faves. There's also Chie and Ai from Virgin's Empire. Blupjeans from The Adventure Zone and JonMartin from The Magnus Archives.

As for Not Confirmed ships, I like Flick/CJ from Animal Crossing, Tsuna/Enma from Katekyo Hitman Reborn, uhhh. Reigisa from Free!, Kanji/Naoto from Persona and Chihiro/whatever the fuck his name is Mondo? Or the other guy I forget, from Danganronpa. Also RenLaw, RenStrade, and VinceLaw+VinceFarz from BTD.

(I am including straight relationships involving trans ppl obv.)

10. What does makeup mean to you? Do you wear any?

I hate how I look with make up it makes me dysphoric. But to me makeup is a good expressive outlet and bomb as hell, so when I do wanna wear makeup, I prefer wearing eyeliner and lipstick (esp in black or blue or green or purple) and glitter.

11. Do you experience dysphoria? How does it affect you?

I experience what I refer to as Silhouette Dysphoria a lot. I experience chest dysphoria but a lot of times it's less about me having them at all and me not liking how I look with them. The same goes for my hips and overall shape. Hence silhouette. I also experience genital dysphoria to a lesser degree, and when I do it's less hating my genitals bc they should be different but more just having any at all. Luckily I was born with internal genitalia so I don't have to think about it as much. Social dysphoria I also experience, but I've talked about that already.

How I deal with it is binding and stuff.

12. What is the stupidest thing you've heard said about the LGBTQ+ community?

Hmm. The ppl who genuinely argue that accepting the community means you'll be forced to accept pedophilia or beastiality. Like. Lmao no?

13. Favorite thing about the community?

I just love how great it feels to be in it tbh. It can be so positive and loving and just genuinely make you feel good about yourself.

14. Least favorite thing about the community?

Exclusionists.

15. Have you ever been to your city's pride event?

No, but I went to Pride in Des Moines!!! IT WAS GREAT!

16. Favorite LGBTQ+ celebrity?

I don't really follow celebrities, but probably Ian McEllen and Tim Gunn.

17. Have you been in a relationship and how did you meet?

I was in a relationship for a while with a friend of mine and it was wonderful tbh. We met in a server and started talkng more, and started out as qpps then became partners and like we broke up, but I still enjoyed the experience and wouldn't go back in time and stop it from happening. My other qpp tho. That's something I would do lmao.

I also have a bf but that's a secret~

18. Favorite LGBTQ+ book.

I haven't read a lot of books, so I guess I have to say The Raven Cycle bc that's the only one I remember reading.

19. Have you ever faced discrimination?

Mmmm the only time I have experienced direct discrimination I was giving a friend valentines chocolate in high school and some kid called me a d*ke when i walked past him.

The other stuff is like. My therapist telling me to check for a hormone imbalance when I said I was asexual.

20. Favorite LGBTQ+ movie/show?

She-ra, "To Wong Foo, Thanks For Everything", The Runaways (the movie not the show), No. 6.

21. Favorite LGBTQ+ bloggers?

I don't have any lmao.

22. Which slur do you want to reclaim?

Queer, bc it's already been reclaimed and it fits me.

23. Have you ever gone to a gay bar or drag show? How was it?

Nope. Never, but it'd be fun!!

24. How do you idrntify your gender?

Already answered this lol.

25. Interested in having kids?

Nope. I'd be too scared of screwing them up.

26. What identity service would you give your younger self?

I wish I'd known there was an ace community before I was older tbh. So that, probably.

27. What do you think of gender roles in relationships?

I personally like playing a feminine role, but I also think gender roles are unecessary, so like. As long as I'm an equal I don't care what role I play lmao. If you wanna treat me like the handmaiden, as long as you're not doing it bc you see me as a woman I don't care.

28. Anything else you wanna share about your gender?

Nah. Just. I don't bother trying to pin it down anymore bc the more I analyze it the less I understand it.

29. Something you wish ppl knew about being LGBTQ+?

Hmmmm not really. It's fun outside of the systemic oppression?

30. Why are you proud to be LGBTQ+?

For me it's less about pride in being LGBTQ+ and more being proud to express myself authentically. 🤷

[electroma89]

DO THEM ALL

JESUS CHRIST WOMAN!!!

flower crown: when did you last sing to yourself?

today, I was doing my makeup and singing to “Hand of Doom” by Black Sabbath

fairy lights: if a crystal ball could tell you the truth about anything, what would you want to know?

oh boy, knowing if god exists is really tempting

daisies: what is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

learning to love myself exactly as I am

1975: what is the first happy memory that comes to mind, recent or otherwise?

I was at left side of the stage, second row, 17 years old and completely mesmerized

matte: if you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living?

I would worry waaaaaaay less that’s for sure, I would treat myself more often without feeling guilty

black nail polish: do you have a bucket list? if so, what are the top three things?

I used to, but concert tickets and trips are always there

pantone: describe a person close to your life in detail.

oh man, there’s this person who has wild hair, easy laugh, short temper and crazy ideas

moodboard: do you feel you had a happy childhood?

partially, I mean at that time I felt I was a very happy kid, but now looking back I realise that some attitudes my peers had towards me weren’t “normal” (like teasing me for some of my physical features), and some feelings I had weren’t part of “growing up” (dissociation). Of course I wish I knew that “this weird feeling” was called “being nonbinary” too.

stars: when did you last cry in front of another person?

I don’t remember exactly when, but it was in front of my mom

plants: pick a person to stargaze with you and explain why you picked them.

you know what? I would pick the shit out of you!!! I would love to see you face to face in first place, but also have long talks and laughs under the stars, that would be so nice

converse: would you ever have a deep conversation with a stranger and open up to them?

with a total stranger? no, I made that mistake already

lace: when was your last 3am conversation with someone, and who were they to you?

my boyfriend probably? idk I’ve been sleeping super early lately (aka 1 am)

handwriting: if you were about to die, and you could only say one more sentence to one person, what would you say and to whom?

I can’t really answer this bc depends on the circunstances of my death

cactus: what is your opinion on brown eyes?

I have brown eyes, brown eyes are the shit!

sunrise: pick a quote and describe what it means to you personally.

“… and live my days instead of counting my years” (do lyrics count as quotes? idc), for me it means to cut the bullshit and just live to be happy and not caring if I’m too old to enjoy something

oil paints: what would you title the autobiography of your life so far?

“when will the next adventure start?”

overalls: what would you do with one billion dollars?

OH BOY! I would help my mom to start her own bussiness, I would travel to every country, try every food, I would buy every instrument and learn how to play them all, I would hire teachers and study until I was fluent in every language I love, idk fam so many things

combat boots: are you a very forgiving person? do you like being this way?

no, and yes, sometimes you just need to get rid of the shit in your life and not feel guilty about it

winged eyeliner: write a hundred word letter to your twelve year old self.

dear 12 yo me:

hard times come, but at the end you’ll be ok, what you feel now is real, no one will lock you away if they find out, you’re not too weird, you’re not crazy, you’ll find a whole community who feels just like you, healing may be a bit late, but it’ll come, sadness (happiness, everything) comes and goes, you’ll allow yourself to exist: gross, ugly, fat, with bad eyebrows, and then clear skin, weight loss, body hair, lots of eyebrows tutorials, you’ll love yourself with everything you have, and you’ll find people who will do exactly the same

pastel: would you describe yourself as more punk or pastel?

more punk, definitely, but I’ve been adding cute pastel details to my style, like these cute phone/pc wallpapers and details in my makeup and nail polish and stuff

tattoos: how do you feel about tattoos and piercings? explain.

if they help people express themselves then fantastic! tattoos don’t work for me tho, and I’m a bit wary about piercings, bc infections and stuff

piercings: do you wear a lot of makeup? why/why not?

depends if I’m going out, weather and my mood, but normally I do a basic makeup routine with dark lips, I love to wear makeup btw

bands: talk about a song/band/lyric that has affected your life in some way.

Queen has been a HUGE staple in my life since always, since I could understand english their lyrics have shaped my life, and I dare to say their second album (Queen II) saved my life tbh

messy bun: the world is listening. pick one sentence you would tell them.

people deserve respect

cry baby: list the concerts you have been to and talk about how they make you feel.

ok let’s do this

Bjork - 2007 (best night of my life)

Los Bunkers - 2010 (best night out of my country)

Caifanes - 2008 or 2009? (idk I didn’t know them before the concert, I went with a friend) 

Queen + Adam Lambert - 2015 (so many emotions omfg)

Black Sabbath - 2016 (I expected more, not gonna lie)

grunge: who in the world would you most like to receive a letter from and what would you want it to say?

I prefer not to answer this one if that’s ok

space: do you have a desk/workspace and how is it organised/not organised?

I used to, know is full with boxes and other stuff

white bed sheets: what is your night time routine?

brush my hair, taking a collagen pill, brush my teeth and my braces, clean my face with astringent

old books: what’s one thing you don’t want your parents to know?

it’s the total opposite lmao, I want them to know I’m nonbinary so fucking badly, but since we’re invisible I don’t know how to tell them

beaches: if you had to dye your hair how would you dye/style it and why?

I’ve been through so many colors so far, I think the next step would be a rainbow style or something like that

eyes: pick five people to go on an excursion with you. who would you pick and where would you go/what would you do?

my bf

my cousin

you

a friend I no longer talk to bc damn I miss him sometimes and that would be great to talk and “close the circle” if necessary

a childhood friend

11:11: name three wishes and why you wish for them.

to have a steady income, bc I have to eat lmao

to travel, in and out my country, bc I wanna know as many cultures as I can

to be seen as a nonbinary person in this country, bc being invisible is not a privilege

painting: what is the best halloween costume you have ever put together? if none, make one up.

OH MAN I THOUGHT NO ONE WILL EVER ASK!!!

idk why I don’t have another one with better quality!!! but anyways: my aunt as Roger Taylor, my mom as Brian may, my cousin as Freddie Mercury and me as John Deacon (I want to break free video)

lightning: what’s the worst thing you’ve ever done while drunk or high?

talking about family issues with my bullies I mean that was dumb af

thunder: what’s one thing you would never do for one million dollars?

rape someone

storms: you on only listen to one song for the rest of your life, or only see one person for the rest of your life. which and why?

song, bc I’d go crazy otherwise, and probably “seven seas of rhye” by Queen tho I’m not sure

love: have you ever fallen in love? describe what it feels like to realise you’re in love.

I am rn, everything feels at peace and calm

clouds: if you’re a boy, would you ever rock black nail polish? if you’re a girl, would you ever rock really really short hair?

lol I’m neither and I rock both

coffee: what’s your starbucks order, and who would you trust to order for you, if anyone?

I don’t go to starbucks, but I’d trust any order to my mom or my bf, they know me the best

marble: what is the most important thing to you in your life right now?

feeling peace, being happy

THIS WAS SO DEEP FAM OMFG

[noctomania]

I know i complain a lot about this & i know i may not know everything but what i do know has just continued to piss me off.

I used to use this tumblr partially just to rb stuff but also to dump shit that was on my mind kinda like a livejournal (i used to have one). I liked having it out in the open so that if ppl out there were going through something similar they could see they weren't alone in experience or in having no idea of what to do. For the past few years every time i wanted to do that i had to second guess myself bc my stepmom thought it was ok to find my blog & creep on it without letting me know until she came across something she wasn't happy with. After she told me that, i tried to change as much in my privacy settings, short of deleting my blog entirely, to prevent her from snooping if she wasn't going to respect me. I still don't know if any of it worked. For all i know she could still be.

My mind is often plagued by the time I was reaching out to my parents when i was facing homelessness, like serious homelessness. Not the summer homelessness i had already been enduring for the 5yrs prior. I'm talking i couldn't get a full time job & was barely surviving on part time work at Marshall's for minimum wage & no benefits. Im talking i was lucky i had any savings left over after college bc most got ate up - literally. Im talking i worked through college to feed myself, PLUS was an RA to cover housing fees, plus a full time student. My first apartment i was living in a large closet. As a sublet. Paying twice as much rent as i should have been. And got robbed a half a months rent.

When i was already reaching out to social services i also reached out to my parents for advice. I said nothing about money nothing about moving onto their couch. Just guidance. They came back at me with "we can't help you". They made it seem like i was asking them to carry me. I felt at that point the only option i had with what experience i had was to run away back to school. Which meant literally doubling the debt i already had. The only reason i wasn't paying into the debt at the time was i was literally too poor to.

Going back to school was great i terms of i had money finally & got to move back to salem & afford living alone. But if you're running away TO school...you don't want to go to school you want to run away. I wasn't ready, i was just desperate. So the plan failed, i failed, i ran away again. I was exceptionally "lucky" this place had jobs open.

But what im on about tonight is the info i found about my parents & their money. Now mind you when i say my parents i mean my dad & his wife. My real mom been dead long time. SHE was poor. SHE raised my sister & i primarily alone. We had food bank & food stamps & free/reduced breakfast lunch & hand-me-downs from neighbors. That's how I grew up. So when my stepmom tried to deny that we grew up poor I cut her out of my life. Haven't spoken to her in years & only just spoke to my dad for first time in years my last birthday. I sadly regret taking the call bc it was just "when you gonna move your stuff out". After years of not talking. All he could think about was that. My stuff which mind you they stuffed into a corner of a mouse-infested garage so inevitably a lot of my stuff is now rat-nestings. They couldn't spare a single one of their several fuckin rooms IN THE HOUSE.

Tonight i was bored & thought what if i can look up info on how much they couldn't help me when i was broke. Turns out they make over 220k a yr, with AT MOST one employee besides themselves to pay (didn't even pay them enough imo) & pay thousands in property taxes for property they do literally nothing with & for a house with FIVE FUCKIN BEDROOMS AND THREE BATHROOMS FOR JUST THE TWO OF THEM TO LIVE THERE & NEVER INVITE ANYONE OVER BC THEY HATE COMPANY. That is their SECOND house mind you (last i checked with my dad they are looking at buying their third jfc). But they couldn't help their own child. And yes I understand running a private business costs money. I also understand that they don't get weekly checks, it's all depending on what cases they can get/win. They always acted like they had less money than they do though. Many years they worked out of the house so there was no extra rent to pay. I've been working in my current job for over 5yrs & I am just now finally making 35k/yr after many union fights.

I can't find it in my heart to forgive them. Had mom still been alive she would have stripped their small intestines right out of their ass for turning a cold shoulder. They didn't offer any advice or help when I asked except dad tell me to sign up for the military. Which goes to show how much they actually thought about me considering I am not allowed to join the military even if I wanted to bc I am transgender. I know for a fact bc i did still have to sign up for selective service when I applied for a loan for grad school & they sent a letter back rejecting me. But I still got to sign up for the debt 🥴 It was further disturbing considering my parents have always been very anti-military. It felt like a real "go fuck yourself" response & I've never been able to shake that or been able to properly explain to them how that felt. They don't get it & they don't care bc they think it's"good for me" or "builds character". I don't think either of them have ever faced the experience my sister & esp I have. Their standards seemed to revolve only around what they wanted me to do & not at all around what I need. But had the audacity to criticize politicians doing the same thing.

The work they do is great, & I'm proud of that. They've fought to provide social security & disability support to those who need it. But what sense does it make that you're more willing to help strangers than you are your own family?

They never even visited me up here. Not once.

I hate this country i hate my family i hate money i hate bullshit. All that i care about are cats/nature, food, & weed. Everything else is a waste of my patience. And i know there are ppl out there doing good things doing right by those they love, but that shit doesn't "heal" me like it does everyone else. Basic kindness shouldn't be such a commodity.

I've spent every year ive been working here saving as much money as I can without completely neglecting myself. I've had set backs primarily due to my health. But as far as i see it I am the only safety net i have at this point. I have no life. I don't even know how to have a life anymore. Quarantine didn't even phase me bc I already had no life to give up & still had to show up to work like regular.

It's no fuckin wonder ive had so much suicidal ideation over the years, I've nowhere I feel I can turn where i feel 100% trust.

AND I'M PRIVILEGED AF. I am white, I have a steady job & a union, I am making more money more consistently than I ever have before. Getting here has been hell & terrifying. Being shown that my parents really aren't there for me, finding out that I'm actually terribly alone in the world, & literally just having to double down on being my own best friend. It definitely ices the heart & cuts the elasticity of the tolerance.

Part of me really wants to just lay into them for this bullshit. But other part of me is like what for? If they would feel bad they should already. But they don't & won't. So I just gotta move on & ignore their calls.

[aftgonice]

tagged ages ago by @robb-greyjoy, grazieee ♥

Rules: answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people

THE LAST

1. drink: white tea with honey 2. phone call: my esthetician lmao 3. text message: my mom or one of my mutual friends 4. song you listened to: Snow Cats - AFI 5. time you cried: two days ago when I thought about Damen and Laurent 6. dated someone twice: no 7. kissed someone and regretted it: nope 8. been cheated on: I fucking hope not 9. lost someone special: yeah 10. been depressed: not clinically no 11. gotten drunk and thrown up: yeah last time was exactly one year ago but before that it only happened one time 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS 12. violet 13. blue 14. orange

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU 15. made new friends: only online ones 16. fallen out of love: no 17. laughed until you cried: yeah 18. found out someone was talking about you: I’m not sure OH WAIT yes I think so, more like I’m 99% sure someone already knew something I went to tell them because they weren’t surprised so I know they knew it from other sources

19. met someone who changed you: yes some of my mutuals 20. found out who your friends are: I mean idk but I definitely found out who wasn’t my friend 21. kissed someone on your facebook list: no GENERAL 22. how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: idk anymore, haven’t used facebook in ages tbh 23. do you have any pets: kinda but no 24. do you want to change your name: no 25. what did you do for your last birthday: had cake with my family 26. what time did you wake up: 9:20 am 27. what were you doing at midnight last night: reading a book 28. name something you can’t wait for: having a kitten 29. when was the last time you saw your mom: tonight 31. what are you listening to right now: Sweet Things - The Pretty Reckless 32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: Tommaso, yes, Tom, no. <--- leaving my mutual’s reply because same 33. something that is getting on your nerves: sucking at managing my time 34. most visited website: on the browser I guess tumblr :/ poor life choices I know 35. hair colour: brown (natural) 36. long or short hair: long 37. do you have a crush on someone: is it a crush if I’ve been with this person for a long time 38. what do you like about yourself: mmh I’m......adaptable? I don’t fucking know 39. want any piercings: I’ve been complaining for about 7 years that I want another earlobe piercing other than the standard one but have I ever actually gone and get it? Nooooo 40. blood type: A+ 41. nickname: none 42. relationship status: taken 43. zodiac: Leo 44. pronouns: she/her 45. favourite tv show: I really don’t know anymore, I used to like so many but I’m not comfortable saying any of those are my favs anymore because watching them now I would probably hate them 46. tattoos: no and never 47. right or left handed: right handed but for certain things ambidextrous I think 48. surgery: only wisdom teeth so far 49. piercing: just the standard earlobe ones 50. sport: I used to do volleyball and then taekwondo briefly. Not doing anything rn 51. vacation: art cities or natural stuff like,,,, national parks and stuff like that 52. pair of trainers: new balance MORE GENERAL 53. eating: as healthily as I can but often failing 54. drinking: you’re gonna have to be more specific than that honey, I’m drinking water rn but if you mean like if I drink alcohol I do it rarely 55. im about to: go pee because I’m peeing myself tbh brb

56. waiting for: inspiration for a fic because idk how to start it, I mean I know what needs to happen but HOW is the question and I can’t start writing bc the thing I need to happen needs to happen at the beginning 57. want: you’re not ready for this conversation 58. get married: no tbh I don’t believe in marriage like it’s literally just a contract and the only benefit is stuff that is unrelated to love like taxes and some privileges which are the only reasons I would consider getting married tbh

59. career: just,,, let’s skip this

WHICH IS BETTER 60. hugs or kisses: depends I don’t want to choose

61. lips or eyes: again don’t make me choose 62. shorter or taller: idc 63. older or younger: idc (wow I’m boring) 64. nice arms or nice stomach: the answer is still idc 65. hook up or relationship: relationship  66. troublemaker or hesitant: hesitant  HAVE YOU EVER 67. kissed a stranger: no I mean kinda but no 68. drank hard liquor: yes 69. lost glasses/contact lenses: no 70. turned someone down: yes 71. sex on the first date: no 72. broken someone’s heart: not that I know 73. had your heart broken: I guess 74. been arrested: no 75. cried when someone died: yes 76. fallen for a friend: too many years ago

DO YOU BELIEVE IN 77. yourself: sometimes 78. miracles: no 79. love at first sight: no just lust at first sight 80. santa claus: do I look like I’m 7 81. kiss on the first date: ??? if it happens there’s nothing to believe in  82. angels: no I’m an atheist so idk how there would be angels OTHER 83. current best friends name:  I don’t wanna say sorry 84. eye colour: brown 85. favorite movie: idk don’t ask me these things please

Idk who has done this but I tag @ilgattopatata @meimagino @argentoheart @otasucc @onotherflights @pllsetskyonice and idk who else sorry I don’t wanna be annoying with these tags and feel free to ignore

[bitt3rsw33tsymph0ny]

1. If you had to choose, whiskey or tequila? Why?: Living in Scotland now I would have to choose whisky. Firstly, the whisky here is excellent. Secondly, whisky really sends me over the moon! I had it the other night and I don’t remember the last time I was that happy/hyperactive! I also don’t remember much... 2. While doing school work, do you take your time or do you try to get it done as quickly as possible?: With uni work it depends, I usually take my time because I won’t understand it if I go fast. Unless I have a deadline coming up, in which case it’s not my choice. 3. When did you last wear a scrunchi?: A few weeks ago. 4. If you were a writer, what would you write about most?: I think i’d probably write history books and articles. Fiction is my forte with writing but realistically if I had a job writing it would be related to research.

5. Do you sometimes yell to get your point across?: Not intentionally but sometimes when I’m riled up enough.

6. If you get a period, what symptoms do you get when you PMS?: I think my moods get affected, like I’ll be much more likely to lose my rag and cry over something insignificant. I also tend to crave things like chocolate and get hungrier easier. 7. Is there anyone at your school with a cool accent? What kind of accent is it?: Loads of people from everywhere. I have a few south african friends with nice accents, a few american friends (from the deep south), that’s a pretty interesting accent. Also my sexy Italian friend Co who I could probably listen to all day. 8. What is stressing you out most right now?: I have a 4000 word essay due in two weeks I have yet to start, so yes impending deadline stress. I also got matched for a fight in early Nov, so that’s quite nerve-wracking, my first real fight and all. I have less than three weeks to lose 5 kilos and get trained up for my fight. ARGHHHHHHHH. 9. Are you more smart and thoughtful or understanding and kind?: I’m not sure, I guess the latter? People would call me understanding/kind more than smart/thoughtful, though I like to think I try to be all those things. 10. Who last asked you for a favor? What was it?: My friend asked me to call a cab to the club last night 11. If you had to decide, what do you think people envy about you?: My white girl privilege. My upbringing in Greece and the fact i’m relatively well-off. my looks I guess? And my toughness. People are definitely jealous I can kick some ass. 12. If you want to get your crush’s attention, what do you do?: Fight them hahahah. No but seriously...or just talk to them? I’d make sure I look good round them. 13. How long have you been single or in a relationship for?: I have been single for a bit over two months now. 14. Are you closer to your friends or family?: My family and I are very close. 15. Do you know what you’re going to wear tomorrow?: Nope, but I should probably pull out an outfit, make sure I actually get to uni before 9 tomorrow. 16. Do you use white strips or anything else to whiten your teeth?: Nope, I would like to but effort. 17. Are there any special events coming up? What are they?: My fight on the 11th. Mid term break next week! Halloween! Eliotts b-day! Yay!   18. When it comes to strangers, how trusting are you?: Very trusting. Almost too trusting. I mean I’m not a complete idiot (most of the time) but I do believe the best in people and might have put myself in vulnerable potentially dangerous situations in the past. 19. If someone insults/makes fun of you, what do you do?: Knee em in the solar plexus. Or just laugh about it? Or poke fun back. Depends on the insult and who dished it out tbh. 20. What color do you think represents your personality?: Gold bitch. Nah I think a deep purple or maybe vibrant orange represents me. 21. Would you rather drive on a long straight highway or windy backroads?: Long straight highway, my tummy can be a bit sensitive on the windy roads. Though they do tend to be in prettier areas. 23. What is the fastest you’ve ever gone in a car?: Not sure. Over 100 miles an hour. 24. Have you ever seen someone break their bone in real life?: Yes, and I’ve seen my sisters arm snapped bendy like a banana. So disturbing. 25. If you got to choose an animal to disappear forever, what would it be? Why?: Uh, the one in the white house. <-- agreed! 26. What are the keys of your heart?: Food, good sex and laughter. 27. Are you sometimes a control freak?: Not really. Only in the kitchen. 28. If you’re online right now, do you have an away message up? What does it say?: Nope. 29. Do you know what your GPA is?: N/A 30. If you got to pick any winter sport to excel at, what would it be?: Skiing would be awesome. Or figure-skating tbh but I think i’d be better at the former. 31. Does it piss you off when people interrupt you? My flatmate constantly rages about this with me but I swear it’s just a cultural thing. Greeks interrupt each other, and try to talk over each other. Not to dominate the conversation, but just bc that’s how conversations go.

32. What event did you last dress up for? Who went to that event? 
 Last night. My friends 21st. A bunch of my old flatmates and first year friends.

33. What was the last picture you took with your phone? It’s a selfie. Sorry... i am merely a product of my generation

34. Are you a fashion-conscious person? Where do you buy most of your clothes? I would say so. I love having a unique style and I love expressing myself with my clothing! Most of my clothes are second-hand from my aunt, but I get a lot of stuff from random charity shops, or if i’m buying zara/hnm. 35. Do you have trouble waking up in the morning? What gets you up and awake? Oh man. Such trouble. If I have somewhere to be it’s easy for me to wake up, but if not - it’s impossible. Sometimes my flatmate comes into my room in the morning and brings me coffee to bed.

36. What’s something fun you’ve done this week? Who was there? 
 So on friday I went on the most fun date. It started in nandos, where we ordered two giant platters of chicken, then we went to a graveyard under stirling castle and smoked a joint on top of this hill. Then we walked home and on the way home, passed a park by my house which has giant swings, climbing frames and a zipline. We climbed up on top of the climbing frame and lay in a swinging basket. Smoked another joint. And THEN we went home and I had the best sex of my life, hands down. He is someone new I have only just gotten to know, a fresher from the MT club. But suffice to say it was the most fun I’ve had all week, and not just because we didn’t run out of things to say the whole night.

37. What’s the last thing you texted someone about? I cancelled a churro date with my friend because I need to study. I know, kill joy I am.

38. When and why did you last blush? 
 I think I said something stupid, that’s usually the reason anywho.

39. Do you currently have a favorite song? What is it? 
 Mazzy star - Halah, though it’s depressing af and just reminds me of Jiggles

40. What is one thing you and your best friend have in common physically? 
 We both have hazel eyes.

41. Now based on your interests, what is one thing you both have in common? We are both into the same kind of politics, interested in social/anthropological perspectives, those criticising grand narratives, such as white ex-colonial perspectives 

42. What, if anything, is hanging on your refrigerator? 
 Nada.

43. What is the last illegal thing you did, even the smallest crime? I was cycling in the dark without lights and got stopped by a police car when I crossed a road without stopping. But it was 3 in the morning and I was cycling home drunk after a night out, gimme a break.

44. How much did each individual thing you’re wearing cost? not much.

45. Is that the normal amount you spend on clothes? meh I don’t spend much on clothes.

46. Do you collect anything? Have you ever? I collect post cards from places I’ve travelled.

47. What languages do you speak? 
 English and Greek. and a wee bit of french.

50. Where do your grandparents live? My grandma lives in bridgend, wales and the other two in pelasgia, greece.

51. When is the next time you’re going on vacation? Where to? Nowhere, fourth year fun yay yay yay! I’m going to Greece actually for christmas. And I’m hoping to go somewhere in Europe in the next couple months if I find cheap flights away. I’d love to go to copenhagen or prague.

52. How well do you do in school? How are your grades compared to your siblings? I do okay, averaging on a 2:1 at the moment. My sister is an a star little kid, so she tends to do very well. 53. Does your family eat dinner together? Who does the cooking? 
 Yes quite a lot. My dad usually cooks, although my mum does too. They share the burden.

54. Are you usually motivated to work or are you a procrastinator?
 P-R-O-C-R-A-S-T-I-N-A-T-O-R.

55. Has the last month been really stressful for you? No it’s been pretty fun and chilled tbh.

56. What do you base first impressions on? (Behavior, clothing, etc.)
 Mostly the kinds of things they like to talk about, the way they interact with others (socially), how polite/friendly they are.

57. Who do you know that is a vegetarian? How about a vegan? 
 I know loads of veggies. My sister has been one for 2 years now. I also know a lot of vegans, friends from uni mostly.

58. When is the last time you went out to dinner with a friend? Where did you go? Who paid?
 Said date on friday, it was kind of meant to be a friendly thing. Nandos, he paid. 59. What was the last thing to surprise you?  Niko sent me a snapchat, very random.