#I’ve been let down so many times with cancellations

[muchcelebrated]

YOU GUYS WE DID IT!

WE DID IT!

[bluebeary-jay]

Damage done

Pre/No-outbreak!Joel Miller x f!Reader

Summary: during a fight with Joel, he unknowingly sends you into a panic attack caused by your previous experiences. he deeply regrets it. (based on this wonderful ask!)

Tags: heavy ANGST, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending (there's also fluff), established relationship, petnames, soft!Joel (he's trying his best fr 🥺). Several years pre outbreak. please read the warnings carefully

Warnings: fighting, talk and mention about previous abusive relationship, panic attack, emotional distress, self-destructive thoughts

Word count: 4K

A/N: i wrote it partially based on experiences with my own panic attacks, but i know everyone's is different. if there's a warning i missed, please let me know. also i want this man to take care of me so much 😢 anyway, stay safe, darlings, and as always: happy reading and i hope you'll enjoy!! 💕 comments and feedback are greatly appreciated 😌

It had been a rough couple of weeks. Things at your work were rocky to say the least, what with your boss firing several people every week and cutting your salary. Joel didn’t have it much better – from what you understood, two clients suddenly canceled their order, and Tommy got himself thrown into jail, again, breaking his longest record to date. On top of that, little Sarah went down with some kind of flu that was raging in schools recently, and for the last two weeks one of you had to be home with her almost all the time.

So it was probably no wonder that the tension and stress became too much at one point, and you both snapped.

It was about the play at Sarah’s school.

“You promised her, Joel! She was talking about it for the entire week.”

“It’s not my fault we have to go out of town on this date,” he answered through clenched teeth, pinching the bridge of his nose and not looking up at you. “I tried to reschedule, but the commissioning party refused. I can’t help it, for fuck’s sake.”

You were glad Sarah wasn’t home right now to listen to your fight. You dropped her off earlier at her friend’s house because she wanted to practice lines for the play they were doing next week. The play that Joel was apparently planning to miss.

You adored Joel – god, you loved him with all that you had – but he could be so stubborn sometimes, it was driving you up the fricking wall.

“It’s your kid, Joel–”

“Yeah, it’s my kid!” he raised his voice, only now lifting his head. His stare was cold and hard, so unlike how he usually looked at you. “Not yours.”

“Are you kidding me?!” you shouted, hurt by his words and the tone he used. “I’ve been taking care of her, loving her– She is like a daughter to me!”

“But still not yours,” he repeated harshly. That was a low blow, especially when he told you so many times that you might not be Sarah’s biological mother, but it’s obvious you love her like she’s your own blood.

“You’re only saying that ‘cause you know I’m right,” you snarled angrily, and Joel huffed a humorless laugh.

“Of course. You always know better, dont’cha?” He stood up, towering over you, but you didn’t back down. If anything, it only made you more mad, as if he was doing this to intimidate you. “I’m sorry I’m such a terrible father in your eyes, but I have to think about earning money. Especially since it’s only a matter of time ‘till that asshole boss of yours will fire you, too.”

“What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?! You really think so lowly of me to say it won’t be long until I get fired?”

“I don’t– Christ, you’re puttin’ words in my mouth again.”

“Again. Of course.” You spat out and took your sweatshirt from the couch, done with him and this conversation. “I’m going to my home,” you told him dryly. Joel’s nostrils flared and he took a step forward.

“No, you’re not.”

“Fuckin’ watch me,” you muttered under your breath, but loud enough for him to hear.

“We are not finished!!” Joel screamed, his booming voice echoing throughout the house.

It felt like a slap. In one second you froze, all your muscles seized up and a feeling of coldness gripped your heart and throat, sending panic flooding your veins. The sweatshirt you were holding slipped out from your stiff fingers.

Joel has never raised his voice at you like that. Never with such anger and fury. There was a bite to his tone that you couldn’t explain, but which you knew very well – the telltale sign that you went too far, and the other person’s patience was at an end, that now you were going to pay for it.

Your previous boyfriend taught you what it means. It meant bruises and split lips, and screaming when you started crying…

Joel noticed the shift in your behavior right away, and his anger immediately ebbed, replaced by confusion and concern.

“Darlin’?” he murmured the pet name, though it rolled off his tongue heavily and with difficulty.

He was still furious at you and your refusal to understand what he was going through, but it all died down when he saw how wide, how empty your eyes were. Your knees buckled, and you looked like you could fall down at any moment.

Joel didn’t have any idea what was happening with you – but knew that whatever it was, it was his fault.

You, in the meantime, felt like you couldn’t breathe. The man in front of you – you weren’t even sure anymore who that was – took a step forward with his hand lifted, and you quickly backed away, stumbling in the process.

“No! N-no, no, please, I’m sorry–” you started blabbering and sobbing, wrapping one arm around your middle to protect all the main internal organs. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to–”

“No, you didn’t…”

“Please… I’m sorry, I swear,” you cried, trembling at this point, but not daring to escape the room. “I’ll be better, just don’t… Please, don’t…”

Joel’s heart broke when he saw you bursting into tears and trying to make yourself as small as possible. All his anger disappeared in a cloud of smoke, replaced by the overpowering need to comfort the girl he loved.

But you seemed so scared when he wanted to come closer… And he didn’t know how to proceed.

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” he repeated in an even softer tone, his eyebrows scrunching in worry. “Sweetheart… M’not gonna hurt you.”

He took another slow step forward, but that seemed to already be too much, because the trembling intensified and you practically slumped against the wall, one arm around your stomach, and the other squeezing your throat tightly. Joel feared to know the reason why you would do that to yourself.

“Stop, plea– I can’t– I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

“No, it’s okay, my baby, it’s alright…”

He fell down to his knees next to you and reached to take you in his arms, but you started shaking your head violently, backing away and squirming out of his reach.

“No, no, please, I’m sorry! Don’t– don’t touch me!!”

A bile rose up in his throat, and he retreated his hands, holding them low in front of him to show he’s not going to do anything.

“It’s alright, babygirl,” he muttered chokingly, feeling completely helpless and lost about what to do. “You… you’re safe.”

You were crying uncontrollably now, though it seemed like you tried to stifle the never-ending sobs and tears flowing out of your eyes, in result making your entire body shake. You flinched – actually flinched – when Joel opened his mouth, and your fingers around your throat tightened their grip.

“No,” Joel said decisively, breaking your wish and grabbing your wrists, moving them away from your neck where red crescents started to form. “Baby, please, don’t.”

“Let go!!” It was hard to distinguish the words from between your cries, but the message your body language was conveying was clear as day. “No, don’t… me…” You sobbed again, quickly weakening despite your efforts. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”

“Come ‘ere,” Joel whispered in a voice full of pain, carefully shifting closer and wrapping his arms around you, though being careful not to make you feel too crowded or trapped. “Shhh… it’s Joel, darlin’, m’here.”

Surprisingly, you let him hold you – maybe it was just because you didn’t have strength to resist and fight back anymore, Joel thought, but maybe you recognized him. Maybe it was both. But the tears didn’t stop. No matter how gently he stroked your back or whispered reassuring words, you couldn’t seem to stop crying.

Several times in the next couple of minutes you tried to grasp your neck or arm again, but every time he delicately, though firmly, moved them away. You still babbled half-intelligible apologies and pleas, and each time your voice broke or hitched on another fearful word, Joel’s heart was shattering into a million pieces all over again.

“I’m sorry…” you sobbed again, trembling in his arms. “I’m sorry, don’t hurt me, p-please–...”

“My darlin’...” Joel held you closer and more securely in his arms, rocking you back and forth. “Sweetheart, my sweet, sweet girl… I’m never gonna hurt you, I swear.” He planted soft, delicate kisses on your hair. Even though he wanted to hug you tightly, to show you how much he loves and cares about you, he restrained himself and tried to keep his touch as gentle as possible. “I swear, my babygirl, m’sorry, so sorry for screamin’... Didn’t mean to.”

You were still crying, albeit weaker now, in his arms, clinging to him like your life depended on it. Joel could feel your nails digging themselves into the skin of his back, but it was the furthest thing on his mind – hell, he could start bleeding and still it wouldn’t be as important as comforting you at this moment. Better him than you.

“I love you s’much, my babygirl, my life,” Joel continued murmuring into the top of your head, feeling close to crying himself when your tears seemingly couldn’t stop flowing. “M’so sorry. I won’t ever hurt you like that again, I swear…”

His words, though full of love and compassion, rolled off you like water off a duck’s back, and you still couldn’t locate yourself, couldn’t tether your being to this world and make sense of the difference between what you knew should happen, and what was actually happening.

Your whole body was hurting, yes, but it wasn’t the pain of being repeatedly hit. You could barely hear your own cries, but it wasn’t because of vicious and cruel words being thrown at you. You knew it was Joel you were clinging to, and he never hurt you in this way, but… but you also were never so angry at each other. You never fought like this – and experience taught you that crossing that invisible line will carry certain consequences.

You weren’t angry now. You were scared. And confused.

“Joel,” you whimpered between gasps, struggling to breathe through your rapid sobs. “I’m sorry. Please, don’t– don’t go.”

“M’not leavin’ ya, babygirl.” He spoke into your hair, closing his eyes. “M’not goin’ anywhere.”

You were calming down a little now, the sobs wrecking your body and breaking Joel’s heart dying down, though you were still shivering. Joel continued to hold and soothe you the best he could.

And wondered who must’ve hurt his darling so much that you’d react so badly.

“I’m sorry,” you whispered after a while, sniffling into Joel’s chest, but trying not to get snots on his shirt. Joel sighed sadly, but his hold on you just tightened.

“No, babygirl, my darlin’...” He pressed his lips to your hairline, stroking your back with his other hand. “You have nothin’ to be sorry for, I swear. It’s okay.”

“It’s not,” you whimpered pitifully, unable to stop another wave of tears from falling. “I’m sorry I reacted like that. I know… Joel, I know you won’t hurt me. Baby, please.” You took his head in your hands, searching his eyes with fear painted across your face. “I’m so sorry, wasn’t thinking and…”

“Hey. Love, it’s fine.” He placed his own hands on your cheeks, stroking lightly your damp skin with his thumbs. “Don’t say that. M’not angry at you and would never be because of that. It’s… it’s okay.” He petted your hair, trying to relax for your sake, but his chest remained tight. “It’s gonna be okay, I promise.”

You nodded weakly, though you weren’t sure if you believed him. Joel swallowed heavily and nodded after a while, too.

“Okay. I… I’ll run you a bath,” he whispered, but you held his hand tighter and shook your head with tears gathering in your eyes again.

“No, no! Just s-stay with me, please.”

Joel took your face in his hands, but you closed your eyes, feeling too vulnerable and exhausted to even try to maintain eye contact.

“I’m here, baby. C’mon, just hold onto me.”

He waited until your arms were around his neck before slowly standing up and tucking you securely in his arms. You hid your wet face in the crook of Joel’s neck, breathing in his soothing smell and trying to calm your breathing, which you still found difficult.

Neither of you said anything when he took you to the bathroom, sat down on the toilet seat and started to fill the bathtub with water and soothing oils. You just watched him, wiping your nose every once in a while.

Still remaining silent, Joel extended his hand and helped you stand up. Then, almost with fearful hesitation, he touched the hem of your shirt, sending you a questioning look. You just nodded, not having strength to undress yourself, and lifted your arms, letting him take your clothes off.

You didn’t let go of his hand even after he guided you to sit in the tub. You couldn’t bear being alone with your thoughts right now, and Joel, being as wonderful of a man as he was, stayed by your side as the warmth from the water seeped through your tired bones.

Another several minutes passed before he finally asked the question that was gnawing at him since the very beginning. You must’ve subconsciously known it was coming, cause it didn’t even surprise you.

“Who was it?” he asked quietly. His hand was still caressing your palm with the gentlest of touches, but his eyes were like ice, full of hidden rage and hatred. “Who did this to you, darlin’?”

You wrapped your arms around yourself, not sure whether to answer or not. Ever since you got to know him, Joel has been nothing but kind and understanding, never pressuring you into doing or saying something you didn’t want… but you had a feeling he wasn’t going to let the matter drop.

And honestly, you were afraid to tell him. To admit how your previous relationship looked and what exactly happened to make you act so strongly about something so small. Because… what if he’ll realize how broken you are, how much effort it’d take to put up with you, and he’ll leave? Even if he was willing to take care of you, it was really unlikely that he’d stay – even if he says that now.

You were doing good until today. You managed to hide the issues you had with yourself and all the pain you carried inside, never letting Joel know that something was wrong with you. But now he… he will…

You didn’t want him to leave. He made your life so much better and you loved him to pieces with all your heart, as weak and broken as it was.

You couldn’t lose him.

“Oh, baby…” Joel’s hands cupped your cheeks so carefully and lovingly that you almost started weeping again. “M’not goin’ anywhere. I love ya so much. You’re never gonna lose me.”

You didn’t realize you said those words out loud, but even so, somehow his affirmations didn’t make you feel any better. You wanted them to comfort you, but if anything, they just made you feel sick.

“I’m afraid you’re gonna leave someday,” you whispered hoarsely, keeping your eyes on the slowly disappearing bubbles. “I know I’m being selfish, but I don’t want you to. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me, Joel. I…” Tears spilled from your eyes again and you shook your head. “I know I’m too much. And… and broken. And I know it sounds like I wanna guilt-trip you, but I’m not, I’m just–” You choked on a sob, and wrapped your arms tighter around yourself, hugging your knees to your chest. “I don’t– don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“Sweetheart, look at me, please.” Joel’s hands were rough to the touch, but so incredibly gentle when they guided you to meet his eyes, and a big pit formed in your stomach when you saw how they shone. He was on the verge of tears, too. “Don’t say things like that. Nothin’ is wrong with you. Who…” He sighed again. “Who made you believe such things?”

You didn’t answer at first, but Joel kept staring at you, and – finally – you relented.

“My previous boyfriend. The one I didn’t want to talk about. He– Look, I know he was a horrible person.” You let out a short laugh, but without any joy – or emotions altogether – in it. “And I hate him so much, but he… he was right. About some things.”

“He’s not.” Joel didn’t back down, feeling despair growing inside his chest as he saw the girl he adored with his whole heart put herself down like that. “You’re… fuck, you’re perfect, darlin’, and you didn’t deserve to be treated or talked to this way. M’so sorry it happened to you.”

He brushed some of your hair to the back and sighed silently. He seemed so lost and sad, it made you feel even worse.

“What can I do?”

That stopped the train of your thoughts, and you looked up.

“What?”

“What can I do?” he repeated softly. “To prove t’you that I’m not goin’ anywhere.”

Your lips parted, and you were unsure what to say. Joel took your hand in his, delicately tracing patterns on the back of it.

“Babygirl, listen to me. You’re the most precious thing t’me. I don’t care what this asshole told you, but… but none of this is true. And it’s not gonna drive me away from you. Nothin’ is gonna make me leave,” he repeated more firmly, never taking his eyes off you. “Because I love you. More than anythin’ else in the world”

Joel sounded so sincere and desperate, tugging at your heartstrings with his gentle, sad eyes and loving words. The water became cool some time ago, but your insides felt like they were on fire – as if the next breath you were about to take would be your last.

“I’m sorry for everything I said.” You took a shaky breath, trying to keep your voice steady. “I don’t think you’re a bad father. I think you’re the best and most amazing dad Sarah could ever ask for. I didn’t want…” You sniffed and your shoulders started to shake again with silent cries. “I didn’t want to hurt you, I’m so sorry, I didn’t–”

The sob that you tried to stop with all your might suddenly escaped you, and Joel’s forehead scrunched in worry. He pulled you closer, leaning over the edge of the bathtub. Neither of you concerned yourself with water dripping off your skin, only feeling relieved from each other’s closeness.

“I know, babygirl. M’not mad.” Joel left a lingering kiss on your tearstained cheek, and then a second one on your forehead. “I’m sorry, too. For how I acted and for–” he sighed heavily into your shoulder, “for shouting at ya.”

“You couldn’t have known,” you mumbled, but he shook his head.

“That’s no excuse. I shouldn’t ‘ave done it in the first place.” He relaxed in your arms, and somehow it made your muscles less tense, too. “I’ll see what I can do about that job. So that I can see Sarah’s play.”

You nodded and let your eyelids drop, giving in to the feeling of calm and security that always came with being with Joel.

“Can I sleep here tonight?” you asked quietly. You still were a little afraid that he’s going to turn you down after what happened, but you really didn’t want to stay alone. “With you?”

“‘Course you can. D’ya want to go now?”

You nodded again. Not bathing seemed like a big waste of water, but you didn’t feel strong enough to actually wash your body. And Joel didn’t pressure you – he just bent over and wrapped his strong arms around you, practically pulling you out of the tub by himself.

His clothes were completely soaked when he put you down and reached for the fluffiest towel you had, wrapping it around you like a little cocoon. He got rid of his wet shirt, kissed your head gently and, without a word, scooped you up into his arms again.

“I can stand,” you offered when he started walking towards the bedroom, forcing you to wrap your hands around his neck for support.

“I want to take care of you.”

“But your back pains…”

“I’m not that old yet, sweetheart,” he answered with a half-smile, slowing down and gazing into your eyes softly. “Let me take care of you.”

You brushed his cheek with your fingertips tenderly, eyes flickering across his face. “But you’re always taking care of everyone, Joel.”

His throat bobbed and he almost immediately looked away. It was clear what he was thinking – that according to himself, he wasn’t doing a good enough job. Because you got hurt. Because he was the one who unintentionally hurt you and sent you into a panic attack.

He was silent when he put you down on the bed with care, turning around to fetch one of his shirts from the closet. During this whole time you didn’t say anything, either. Your mind was still a little closed off from when you tried to separate yourself from the painful memories that started to haunt you, and despite Joel’s efforts, it was still difficult to move past the experience.

But your head snapped up when Joel, after helping you put the shirt on, knelt in front of you, took your hand in his and leaned forward to kiss your knee gently.

“M’sorry,” Joel whispered with pain tinging his deep voice. “I’m sorry for sayin’ all those things about you and Sarah. I know you love her.” He pressed his lips to your knee again, and lifted his head, revealing how misty his own eyes were, which in turn made your heart ache even more. “My sweet girl. I swear I won’t ever hurt you again.”

“You didn’t hurt me,” you answered quietly, but Joel shook his head and took a deep breath.

“What can I do?” he repeated his question from earlier, and this time you knew exactly what you needed him for.

“Can you… can you hold me?”

Without missing a beat, Joel raised from his position and enveloped you in his embrace, making you feel safe and protected like never before. You sighed heavily, breathing in his scent and feeling like just by touching you with such love that only he was capable of, he helped you to lift some invisible load from your shoulders.

Despite the headache from all the crying and your chest still tightening with every shallow breath you took, you felt a little better now. You didn’t feel alone.

You knew you were safe with Joel.

It took some time for you to fall asleep, but even when you did, Joel could not find peace in the silky darkness of the evening.

Before you dozed off, Joel vowed again and again how much you mean to him, how you and Sarah are the best things that ever happened to him, and how he’ll never let anything happen to any of you – and he could clearly see that you believed his every word, and that you weren’t mad at him. You weren’t flinching when he rocked you back and forth, or later when he pressed small kisses to your forehead.

But you still were quiet and your face miserable, and several times Joel tucked you in closer to himself when he felt you shaking and sniffing. There wasn’t anything else he could do but hold you and whisper soothing promises into your hair. Once your eyelids started to drop, he began humming a familiar melody he knew you liked, and you nuzzled your face into his neck, curling up in his embrace.

And you whispered ‘I love you’ before you drifted off to an uneasy sleep in his arms. And before he could even answer, you thanked him for loving you.

When he heard it, he had to keep himself from breaking down with the last bit of his strength.

“You mean everythin’ to me, love. Everythin’,” he murmured after a couple of seconds, not even knowing if you were still awake. The guilt in his chest made it hard to breathe, but he pushed through it, and then he softly kissed your forehead, making a promise to himself.

He will find time to go to Sarah’s play with you. And he’ll make it right.

[steddielations]

Upstaged | Part 2 | Part 1

It all makes sense.

When Eddie comes back from taking photos with the fans, he looks a little sheepish for the first time. Steve has about a million things to ask, mostly he just wants to laugh about the fucking odds, but he remembers the grace Eddie extended to him about the press ordeal.

Instead, he settles back with his lime soda and a simple question, “So, what kind of music are you into?”

A grateful smile breaks out across Eddie’s face, ecstatic to dive into that with Steve. Their lunch extends into dinner. Steve doesn’t have anywhere to be these days and Eddie practically jumps up and down when the meeting he was in the area for gets canceled. They stay there for a couple more hours, just talking. 

Their music taste overlaps at certain points, Eddie talks about how getting his first guitar from the pawn shop pretty much saved him, Steve recounts a little league story that makes Eddie laugh so hard he chokes on his soda.

It’s the most monumentally casual time Steve’s ever had with a new friend in public and he’s not ready for it to end. Even after exchanging numbers and promising to meet up again, they still linger together outside.

“So uh, I remember where I know you from now."

Eddie leans against the side of the building. It’s getting dark, they’re tucked away from any eyes so Steve freely scoots closer to Eddie, waiting for him to explain. He does after a moment, seeming nervous and fiddling with his rings.

“I hate to ask, but my Uncle is huge into baseball, especially you and your general all-around-awesome thing. There weren’t players like you to look up to when he was young, all that. I’ve seen you on his tv so many times, you’re basically part of the family— ah shit, that’s weird, sorry,” he cringes a little, scrunching his nose in a way that makes Steve’s chest clench with affection, “But he’s getting old and like I said earlier, he’s my rock, he raised me and I won’t forgive myself if I don’t at least ask you to come see him sometime.”

The way he rambles is pretty endearing, looking at Steve with a wide-eyed hopeful expression, as if there was even a chance Steve would say no.

He reaches out, gently takes Eddie’s hand to stop his restless fidgeting, “You want me to meet your folks already, hm?”

Eddie lets out an amused scoff, looking down at their hands and back at Steve like he can’t believe it. “You’re not as funny as you think you are, Steve.” 

Steve knits his brows, “Why’s that?”

“C’mon man. Y’know how hard it is to find someone who can handle this lifestyle, let alone all the shit that comes with me,” shaking his head a little, Eddie smiles but there’s something aching in it, “Then the nicest looking guy I’ve ever seen comes outta nowhere and saves my life, agrees to go to lunch, happens too know as well as me that life in the limelight ain’t always pretty and turns out to be one of the best people I’ve ever met.”

His fingers thread through Steve’s, holding tight like he’s not sure it’s real. “Even if I never see you again, I’m gonna write songs about you. I’d take you home and keep you right now if I could, but that’s not happening.”

There’s a part of Steve he’s kept shut down for years that comes pumping through his veins then, hot and alive. He realizes that he’s been trying so hard to keep his life as normal as possible that he’s been missing out on actually living it. Now he has this wonderful, crazy, wonderful man spontaneously in front of him and he’s not letting him slip away. 

Steve moves in, slowly crowding Eddie against the wall. Eddie’s eyes go a little wide with surprise then darken with desire. Steve watches his face shift through so many emotions, his mouth parting with a soft gasp, wanting this just as badly as Steve.

“Wanna bet?” Steve asks before he crashes into Eddie again. 

This time it’s a hot press of lips instead of a full-body collision, but it’s just as breathtaking.

Steve deepens the kiss, thrill prickling all across his skin when Eddie opens up for him right away. Steve licks passed the bright hint of lime on their tongues to get to Eddie. The heady taste of him makes Steve’s world spin, all the desperate noises between them going straight to his head.

“Want you so bad, Eddie, wanna keep you too,” he threads his fingers into all that hair, reveling in the shiver it elicits from Eddie, “God, just wanna have you.”

Eddie chases his lips, “You can, Steve, you can have me— please do.”  

Steve loves the sound of that, going in for a longer, more indulgent kiss before pulling back.

“You can’t take me home tonight,” he professes hotly against Eddie’s lips, “My place is closer, you’re coming with me.”

[cupidbedsy]

୨୧ 603 ; lh43

➪ summary: luke's main goal is to make sure y/n is taken care of, however it's hard for him to do it 603 miles away

➪ warnings: reader overworks herself, school, stress

➪ word count: 2.5k

➪ file type: fic

➪ cupid's notes: i’ve been in a like mood so i decided to get this one out tonight!! ill post a connor blurb tomorrow morning/afternoon and a nico fic tomorrow. more of a schedule release tomorrow probably for the next two weeks

© cupidbedsy ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

She expected this to happen, the pounding in her head, the 20 tabs open on her computer, the dozens of resource articles and research strewn about in her room, the five packets of review guides sitting in a stack on her desk, the half drank cup of coffee, and the tears springing in her eyes. The earbuds in her ears played nothing and the sensation began to irritate her, practically ripping them from her ears and throwing them across the room to somewhere she wouldn’t be able to find again. 

She could hear voices in the living room, just outside her closed bedroom door. They were laughing about something, what it was she had no idea. Her three roommates all had presentations tomorrow and that was it, no more studying, no more writing, they were done. She, however, still had three papers to write and two exams to take. She had regretted her decision to take this many classes this semester but she was preparing herself for her future.

She had gone to stand up, feeling dizzy immediately as her feet planted flat on the floor. She held a hand to the wall, bracing herself from toppling over. She blinked a few times, trying to clear the blurry sight of tears, dehydration, and lack of nutrition. She knew people would be worried about her if they were to see her like this, her hair matted and pulled into a bun as best as she could, and mascara dried on her face that highlighted the dark circles and bags under her eyes. She was wearing Luke’s sweatshirt, the Devils logo plastered over it in the center, mocking her, reminding her that her boyfriend was 603 miles away from her.

At the thought, she allowed herself to tear up more, letting tear after tear fall. There wasn’t much she could do, he was in the middle of a game right now. When she realized he had a game, she turned it on and watched with a soft smile whenever he would show up on the TV. Despite knowing the fact that he would not answer his phone, she called him, hoping to just hear his voice through his voicemail. 

When his voice reached her ears, she could feel some of the tension release from her body. However, the feeling was short-lived as the beep from the end of his voicemail was heard. She didn’t leave a message, she just hung up and watched the remainder of the second period. When the horn blarred in the arena and through the tv speakers, she shut off the screen and returned to work, making her head hurt more. 

She didn’t notice the multiple attempts Luke had made to call her, her phone having died 20 minutes prior when she was writing her essay. She had put her headphones on, canceling most noise from the apartment. She had been ripping off post-it notes after post-it notes, scrambling to write down as many ideas as her brain could process. 

Meanwhile, Luke had been minorly, no majorly, freaking out. She would never call him if he was at a game, not even if it was super important. He could feel himself start to sweat again as he rushed to put his suit jacket on, wiggling his feet into his shoes. He had gone home by himself, not feeling the need to celebrate when his girl could be suffocating 603 miles away from him. 

Ever since they’ve known each other, Luke has known about y/n’s tendencies to throw herself into her school work. He remembers the first time he saw her during exam season. It was the end of their freshman fall term, they had been dating for four months at the time. They had just gotten back from their games in Ohio, he was exhausted from the trip and their 6-1 loss following their win the previous day. All he had wanted to do was go over to her dorm and lay in bed with her. 

ू ₒ ु ୨୧ ू ₒ ु

He knocked on the door, waiting for an answer but nothing came. He felt saddened and knocked again. He received the same answer, none. He turned around and slid down the wood door, hitting the ground with a thud. He put his hands on his head as he waited, kicking his bag to the side. It was only then he heard the footsteps come rushing down the hallway and looked up to see her. She had her backpack that looked as if it weighed 10 pounds, she was clutching five books in her arms and a coffee cup rested on top of them. She had been mumbling when she noticed him and her eyes lit up, “Hi!”

“Hi pretty girl, whatcha doing?”

“Studying.”

He looked at the way her eyes were hidden by the circles underneath them and frowned. He reached out to grab the books from her grasp and she gratefully accepted the offer, going straight to dig the keys out of her bag, “How were the games? Did you guys win?”

He felt heartbroken and confused, she always watched his games when they went away. She would always be the one to point out his goal or an assist that he got, sometimes she even pointed out if Dylan, Mackie, Ethan, or even Owen got a goal. He watched as she pushed the door open, removing her hand from her side to run it through her hair, “You didn’t watch?”

She turned to him, dropping her bag on the ground and reaching out for her books, “No, I was studying. Sorry, Lu.”

Studying? At that time? He did nothing but let her take the books, watching as she started to clean up her dorm. It was only then that he had noticed the state her dorm was in. There were empty boxes scattering the floor, paper plates and bowls on any surface possible, and some of her clothes were mixed in with her roommate’s, it was a mess, to say the least. He made no effort to say anything about it, though. 

She cleaned as much as she could in a matter of five minutes, looking at him with a small smile on her face, “I’m sorry I didn’t watch. I was going to watch the highlights when I got back tonight.”

“Back from?”

“Library. I think I’m starting to become a regular for everyone who works there.”

The thought of her being a regular was somewhat concerning to him, “How often have you been going?”

His voice was a mixture of stern and worried, his eyes somewhat squinted in a glare. She looked as if she had committed a crime at the tone of his voice, “Every day… from the time class was over until they closed.”

His eyes widened, “Jesus y/n.”

“I’m sorry, I just wanted to study. I need to do well.”

“I understand that but you can’t work yourself to the brink of death.” He grabbed the coffee out of her hand and emptied it into the sink, getting rid of the cup afterward.

She whined at the motion, watching him in horror as if he just hit a bird with his car. He walked back over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders, “Tomorrow you are not going to touch a single book, I won’t even let you touch your computer.”

“But-”

“Nuh-uh, nope. No computer, no books, no papers, no anything school-related. We are going to stay in your bed and watch movies all day and eat properly.”

“I eat properly!” She exclaimed in offense.

He gave her a look that said all the different, “Sure. Now I can only hope you still have some of my clothes here somewhere because I do not want to talk to my dorm right now.”

She pointed in embarrassment to one of her drawers, “In there.”

He kissed her forehead and grabbed the clothes before heading for the bathroom, “I’ll be back and I better not see you do any work when I get back.”

She nodded but as soon as he left she ran to her backpack and grabbed her computer. She rushed to finish the last two paragraphs of her essay before he got back but luck was not on her side as she was halfway through her last paragraph and the doorknob turned. She had been so focused on writing that she didn’t care that he entered, “Just let me finish my last paragraph.”

He sighed, dropping his clothes into her laundry basket. He walked back to her bed and looked at her, “Last paragraph?”

“Mhm.” She nodded and scooted over so Luke could sit next to her, “Fine. I don’t want you to lose your train of thought.”

She beamed up at him and kissed his cheek before returning to her work.

ू ₒ ु ୨୧ ू ₒ ु

Ever since then, he had been careful with how much he left her alone in exam season. He always called on road trips, always went to the library with her to make sure she didn’t overwork herself, always made sure she was eating properly and always made sure that she was okay. But now being 603 miles it was hard to do that for her. 

Luke was packing a bag as fast as he could, looking at his laptop for the earliest flight out of there which wasn’t until early the next morning, leaving at 7 and not arriving until 9. Then he would have to wait to get a car and do a 30-minute drive to Ann Arbor. He groaned at the time and went to throw something, at that point he could drive there and be there before getting a plane but he was in no state to drive. 

He continued to try and call her for 30 minutes, on the brink of giving up at that point. Her phone was still dead and she had yet to realize it. She had music playing through her earbuds attached to her computer, typing about something that she considered stupid and unnecessary. She only took breaks to take a sip of coffee or to groan and throw her head back in exhaustion and frustration. 

Luke threw his phone on the bed, running his hands down his face, falling asleep not even five minutes later. Y/n was the same way, she closed her laptop as she finished her last sentence, finally allowing herself to take a break. She got up to go make a burrito in the kitchen, waving to her friends who were also still awake at the time. 

She went to turn her phone on and that was when she realized the lack of battery it had. She shrugged it off and put it down on her nightstand before walking back out to eat and finish watching the movie with her roommates.

ﾟ+*:୨୧:*﹤

She didn’t go to bed until almost three in the morning despite finishing the movie four hours ago. Once they finished, she looked at the piles of paper and study guides she still had to do and sighed. Deciding that her first class wasn’t until noon, she could easily get done with one or two study guides or an essay in three. 

She curled up on her bed when she was done and wrapped the blankets around her tightly. When she woke up and went to look at her phone and saw a tweet from Amanda from an hour ago, “Luke is not at morning practice due to personal reasons. Should expect him back for Saturday’s game in Columbus.”

She immediately woke up at the fact, looking back at her other notifications. There must’ve been at least a dozen missed calls from Luke and 15 text messages. She could only think about the worst, if he had gotten hurt but just didn’t want to tell someone, if he had been so drunk that he couldn’t think straight, if he had a panic attack last night. Her thoughts raced but halted when there was a knock on the door.

She went out to the living room, still clad in her sweats from the previous night. Her friends must’ve either already left or were still sleeping. She walked to the door, peeking through the peephole and gasping. She all but ripped the door open, “Lukey?”

He smiled when he saw her, immediately feeling better. Her eyes were still the same from the first time he had experienced her like this and he knew there would probably be a coffee pot brewing in the next few minutes, but he was here now and that was a wave of relief, “What are you doing here?”

“You weren’t answering my calls and I know you were studying last night so you probably wouldn’t have answered them anyway. But when I saw you called during the game I got worried because you never call. And I just wanted to make sure you were okay and that you weren’t overworking yourself but I can tell that you are.”

She frowned at his words but also felt butterflies in her stomach at the thought of him flying out just because he wanted to ensure she was okay. She stepped aside to let him in and then led him to her bedroom. It was cleaner than what he had witnessed in the past years.

“You can’t just fly out every time you think I’m overworking myself, Luke.”

“I know but I wasn’t thinking. I was worried, really worried.” He held her hand, playing with her fingers as a form of comfort, “How long were you up to last night?”

She hesitated before responding, “3…”

He only sighed and tugged her closer to the bed so they could lay down, “Luke I have class in two hours.”

“I know but just for a little bit, and then I’ll take you to class.”

“You still know you’re way around campus?”

“Did I ever know my way around campus?”

She shook her head and laughed, “No.”

He smiled at her laugh, “You do realize I’m only going to be allowing you to rest while I’m here right?”

“But I have one more essay to finish.”

He glared at her, “Fine, but after that, you are going to be right here, in my arms, and not thinking about school at all.”

“Deal.” He kissed her before allowing her to get up and get ready for class. They both walked on campus to her class with the same thought, grateful that Luke had come to see her. Even with being 603 miles away from each other, they would do anything to be there for one another.

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[hana-no-seiiki]

STILL INTO YOU

yandere batfam x cat villain! reader (+extra!!)

synopsis: moments wherein the batfam n co. realize that after all this time they’re still into you

status: unedited.

[AUTHOR’S NOTE:] Super sorry for the lack of fics everyone!! Lately I found out that my DID symptoms have gotten worse and that I’ve experienced a full blackout (and possibly more, I just have no memory of it). So I’ve just been trying to recuperate my mental health for a while with art related stuff. Which, on the positive side of things, means that I’ll be releasing a Webtoon (pilot) around this July!! Hope to see you guys there during the release!!

Can’t count the years on one hand

That we’ve been together

I need the other one to hold you.

Make you feel, make you feel better.

You never realized how much Bruce knew you until you two sat down and had a meal together. Why? You might ask. Well, you were supposed to have a dinner date with Tim today at the manor, but he was unfortunately caught up on a case. You were about to cancel it, maybe cause some chaos in town and then chill with Jason as revenge for your bestie bailing — but Tim insisted you hung out with his father instead.

The pair knew it was the only way for you to (A) Behave and (B) not sleep with Jason for the nth time that week.

Gazing at all your favorite foods displayed upon the excessively extravagant and expensive table you realized that aside from the second youngest, Bruce knew you the most out of everyone in the Batfamily by virtue of his contingencies and overall time as the Batman while you were training to be Catwoman’s successor.

It was so odd, seeing him so calm and not so hostile when you were around. Eerie.

“I’m sorry.”

“Hm?”

“I always saw you as a threat. Treated you like one. But you were just a kid stuck in a situation you didn’t have a hand on. I’m truly sorry. For treating you that way.”

“. . . Isn’t it your job? No hard feelings really. I’d be creeped out if you treated me so nicely — not the food though this is very much welcomed.” You ranted as you stuck a fork into your steak, pointing it at Bruce’s face. Yet, as much as how you were failing to achieve proper etiquette he didn’t seem annoyed more so . . . surprised?

“I hope to see you have dinner here again next week.” His hands stretched to awkwardly pat your head.

“Depends, will I have more of Alfred’s steak again?”

It's not a walk in the park

To love each other.

But when our fingers interlock,

Can't deny, can't deny you're worth it.

Koriand’r wasn’t an idiot. She knew about Dick’s lingering feelings for you.

Perhaps she may be. Considering the fact that she still tried to be in a relationship with him even then.

“Shit. Kitty? Kitty! Wake up you hear me?!”

“. . . I’m. . .” You coughed, groaning at the pain it triggered all throughout your body “ . . . here . .”

You raised your hand, too weak to reach his face you settled with holding his own. Dick squeezed your intertwined hands with a pained expression , and an intimacy unfamiliar to the alien.

But that wasn’t what made Koriand’r finally understand how hopeless their relationship was.

It was the fear in his face. His pretty features morphed into one of horror.

Ah, even after all this time. Dick couldn’t live without you.

Cause after all this time I’m still into you.

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

Jason spent many, many grueling years under the influence of the LoA. And not once did his body forget the feeling of you.

The butterflies, the heart wrenching pain of being apart from you, and the fleeting, venomous hatred you two shared.

After all, it was your name that escaped his lips the moment he awoke from the dead. Your face the first on his mind. Your voice that he longed to hear again.

He had plenty of time to prepare for this moment. Months? Maybe even years.

“Hey, cool helmet. You a Deadpool fan or . . ?”

But even then, your appearance still made him more nervous than confronting his family once more. More nervous than fighting the villain that ended his life.

“Yikes, awful cut you got there. Need me to patch you up buddy?”

You had grown. He had too, even if it was through some magic, deus ex machina water. Seeing the change in your features, how you shed your youthful look of naïvete and grew into a beautiful/handsome/pretty specimen almost made him break all his plans just to be with you again.

“I know that you’re shy and all but I need words.”

“Yeah.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll be here til the vigilantes show up.”

For his revenge’s sake he hopes that you’ll stay for longer.

Recount the night that I first

Met your mother

And on the drive back to my house

I told you that, I told you that I loved ya.

You felt the weight of the world

Fall off your shoulder

And to your favorite song

We sang along to the start of forever

It was one of those nights when you intruded on the Batfam’s nightly patrols. This time your victim was Damian. And strangely, no one else. He explained that the rest were taking a break.

Leaving out the fact that he poisoned them with some self engineered laxatives.

It was relatively calm until a heist suddenly started in one of the banks you wanted to pick off. Damn.

“Hey, I didn’t know you listened to [Favorite Artist(s)]” You eyes widened at the sound of the music playing the background as Joker’s men began to surround you and Robin.

“Just a casual listener. How did you meet my mother anyhow?” Damian sheathed his katana. Opting to take down his foes by hand to hand combat as he peeled his eyes and ears to listen to you.

Besides he could see that your eyes weren’t on him anyways, so there was no point in showing off.

. . . Not that he was doing that.

“Huh? Well, I know everyone really.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“What if I don’t want to?”

He sighed, bashing a poor guy’s face with his knees, his hands adding force with a pull — yikes. “I don’t know why I bother with you.”

“She hated me at first. Courtesy of Cat Woman and the Bat being together.” You turned to him, and he ducks.

“Then I lost someone really, really important to me. More than anything in this world. More than this world itself.” Your whip meets a goon behind him. Both of you hear a splat sound as the man falls to the floor. “And while everyone was calling me insane, when everything was breaking down around me. She was the only one who didn’t judge me for . . . the things that I did.”

“She supported me and was there for me no matter what.” You gaze at the blood on your weapon and cringe. “And then I realized your dad was an absolute bastard for leaving her behind. So I took up the mask again and made it my mission to make his life miserable."

"Even after the dinner?"

"Especially. Wanna bet on how long til he snaps?"

"Deal."

And after all this time I’m still into you.

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

Some things just,

Some things just make sense

And one of those is you and I

Some things just,

Some things just make sense

And even after all this time

Tim honestly didn’t think he had it as bad as his brothers. Sure, he watched your every move and had extensive digital libraries on everything about you, but he did that for everyone. He was more rational; a man that clung unto his senses.

No it wasn’t his actions that made him realize how dangerously important you were to him, it was the way he felt doing so.

After an excessively arduous mission, the first thing he does as he gets back home is to open up his devices and get back to work. Surprise surprise, the stress wouldn’t go away. Not even when he stopped to play some games or catch up on Dungeon Meshi’s last episodes. And that always, always made him relax.

Anxious, his hands subconsciously guide him to that one folder.

Click Click

Dozens if not hundreds of holographic photos, videos and even fan art of you surrounded him.

Tim stares at a video he took when he first found out your identity.

Curling up into a ball with a blanket surrounding him, he slowly drifts off to sleep. Your voice lulling him into his overdue journey to dreamland.

Yeah, he was more rational than the rest. Yet, some things just made sense. Like you being the only thing in this world that manages to make his heart race and anxieties run away.

I'm into You

Baby not a day goes by that

I'm not into you

Jon was a bit dense. But even then he could see the signs of his best friend slowly losing himself to love and infatuation.

He would have been happy,

if it weren’t for the fact that he had a crush on you first.

Being the sweetheart he is, he backed off, respectful of Damian’s feelings (even if the latter wasn’t of his).

I should be over all the butterflies

But i'm into you (I'm in to you)

“Woah, you guys are done already?” Jon landed. As soon as he heard that he’d be able to fight alongside you after what felt like years (it was a couple of weeks), he flew all the way from Metropolis in record time.

If he knew what awaited him he probably wouldn’t have left at all.

“Yeah.” You gave him a thumbs up. Your head laid atop Damian’s lap as the domino masked vigilante ran his hands through your hair. His gloves off to his side.

“C-Cool.”

Jon cried himself to sleep that night.

Even after knowing of Damian’s feelings all this time, he could never stop his own.

And baby even on our worst nights

I'm into you (I'm into you)

Let em wonder how we got this far

Cause I don't really need to wonder at all

Yeah after all this time

I'm still into you

I'm still into you

I'm still into you

[ NEXT PART : NOBODY GETS ME ]

[frenchkisstheabyss]

♡ LMLY ♡

♡ Pairing: boyfriend!jackson wang x songwriter!chubby!fem!reader

♡ Genre: fluff/smut

♡ Summary: On the evening before one of your boyfriend's parties you confess to him that you've been doubting yourself lately and he has his heart set on easing your mind.

♡ Word Count: 1.7k-ish

♡ Warnings: oral sex (f receiving), vaginal fingering, pet names (baby) & that's about all, bbys

♡ A/N: This is my first Jackson Wang request which I'm really happy about because no one ever really requests/write for him (like, y'all, this man's a certified baddie. let's get it together). Thank you @writhingwrecked for putting this request in. I hope you get the comfort you needed from it!

People usually have one of two ideas about who your boyfriend is. They either categorize him as this dark, brooding artist who’s trapped in the spiral of an existential crisis or some frat boy who spends all of his time partying and drinking. If they took the time they’d see what a sweetheart he is, especially when it comes to you.

Seated opposite you on the couch of his penthouse—one of many he has tucked away in different countries—he keeps your feet balanced in his lap, laser focused on painting your toenails your favorite color. Nothing could possibly be cuter than Jackson is with his hair pulled back into the two tiny space buns you put them in earlier, tongue peeking out from between his lips as he applies the final touches to your nails. 

Tonight Jackson’s having one of his infamous parties, this one on a scenic beach in Thailand. It’ll be the first you’ve attended since joining his songwriting team and your first since the two of you began dating. Anyone who’s anyone will be there and you’re determined to look perfect for it. So, needless to say, you sent yourself into a panic when the nail tech canceled on you last minute.

But it was Jackson to the rescue as always, quieting your fears and insisting that you let him take care of you. That’s the Jackson you know. The one who’ll do anything to keep his girl happy. It gives you butterflies watching him be this patient and attentive with you. It makes your heart race a little faster just feeling his fingers brush your skin as he tilts your foot to inspect his handiwork. 

“That tickles!” you giggle, toes wiggling as he tries to keep you still. 

“Hey, stop that! You’re gonna mess it up” he whines, tickling the arch of your foot on purpose this time. 

You twist away from him, jumping up from the couch to go finish your makeup. There’s two hours until you need to head out for the party and the two of you are still lounging around in your towels. It’s about time you pick up the pace anyway. 

“I don’t have time for this. Some of us have to get ready.” 

Catching you by the arm, he carefully pulls you down onto his lap, peppering kisses all over your face. You resist at first but quickly give up the act, relaxing into his arms to soak up the love he so openly pours into you. “Jackson, I’ll never get dressed if you keep this up.”

Running a hand down to your thigh, he gently rubs it, taking in the beauty of your figure as he does so. “Who says I want you to get dressed?” he asks, the sexy rasp of his voice tickling your cheek. You let out an almost weightless moan at the sensation of his lips skimming your jawline. You rest your hands on his bare chest, feeling it rise and fall with each breath, lean muscles flexing beneath your touch.  “Aah, baby, we don’t, mmm, have time for this right now. If I don’t look perfect for this—” 

Jackson tilts his head up, gazing into your eyes, “Don’t say that, you always look perfect.” 

“To you because you love me but…” you sigh, shoulders dropping under the weight of self doubt, “Jackson, I have to look good so at least it seems like I’ve done something to deserve to be there with all those talented people. With you”. 

Jackson sits back on the couch, his brow scrunching at a statement he couldn’t disagree with more. “What are you talking about? You are ‘talented people’. The songs you helped me write are beautiful”. 

“What if no one else thinks so? What if the album drops and everyone hates them? What if…I’m just not good enough?”

“Baby, look at me” he begs, scooping your cheeks into his hands, “You are more than good enough. Don’t you ever question that. You’re here with me because you’re the best of the fucking best, because…”

He clears his throat, choking back the sentimental side of him that has him wanting to tear up. You see it anyway, the moisture across his irises that make them shimmer like raindrops catching sunlight. 

“I doubt myself too,” he confesses, “I fear the future, worry if what I’m doing is enough, but as long as I have an amazing woman who loves me like you do I know it must be.” 

“Why are you trying to make me cry?” you pout, sniffling back tears of your own. 

“No, it’s not that, baby. I just want you to know how special you are and that we’re in this together. You belong here.”

His lips meet yours in a quick, sweet kiss. “You belong anywhere you want to be.” The next kiss lasts longer, your lips parting to welcome his. “And I will literally fight anyone who makes you feel any different.”

You giggle but Jackson doesn’t. He’s a softie but he’s cutthroat when it comes to protecting you. 

“You’re so cute when you’re serious.”

“Hmm? Just cute?” he asks, kissing you with everything he has.

Wrapping his arms around your waist, he lifts you from the couch, his tongue refusing to leave the fluffy warmth of your cheeks. You shake your head, shivering as the air from the open window blows gently against your now exposed core. “More than cute. Really, really fucking hot.” 

Jackson lays you back on the couch, spreading your legs to slip in between them. “Now who’s being the cute one?” he teases, draping one of your legs over the back of the couch. His right hand moves between the two of you, tracing all the finer details of your pussy. Your slick folds, so soft against his fingertips. Your stiffening clit, twitching as he circles it. Your dripping entrance that clenches at his presence, growing wetter the deeper he kisses you.

“Mmm, I think she wants some attention, baby” he coos, fingers pushing into you, “Can I taste her?” 

Your head falls back against the arm of the couch, eyes fluttering closed as he works his fingers deep into your core. “Yes, please” you moan, nails faintly scraping his shoulders as he ventures down your body. Pushing your towel away, he takes his time massaging your plush figure, praising your form, soothing your worries.

When his head dips between your legs, he kisses your soft inner thigh until his breath’s warming your core. Jackson’s eyes flick up to you, watching all the pretty faces you make as he teases the ridges of your walls. “Oh my god!” you cry, hips lifting from the cushion as he purses his lips around your clit, suckling at the bud with the perfect amount of pressure.

Jackson locks an arm over your waist, gripping your belly as he pins you back down. “Don’t run from me, baby. How am I gonna make you feel good if you can’t keep still?” 

You grab onto the cushion beneath you, pleading with your body to cooperate but she writhes and arches against his hold, simply refusing to listen. Your walls clamp around his fingers, threatening to push them out, but Jackson only sinks them in deeper, your wetness audible as his soaked wrist comes flush against your slit.

“Jackson…” you moan, glancing between your legs to find his face almost completely buried in your pussy. "Hmm?” he hums, staring back at you with those puppy dog eyes you always melt for. Slipping his fingers out, he drives his tongue into you, slurping your juices down, grateful to taste more of you. 

All you’ve done leading up to tonight is live in your head—stressing, worrying, doubting yourself. The pressure of it all was unbearable but gradually it lifts. With every curve of Jackson’s tongue, a sense of euphoria flows through your body, washing away anything that makes you question the woman that you are.

Jackson needs you, can’t get enough of you. Your body. Your spirit. Your mind. This is what you deserve, to lay back and be pleasured, juices flowing down his throat with not a single thing for you to worry yourself about. Nothing except the pulsing in your core, the pressure building inside of you gradually, letting you bask in each level of intensity before being pushed to another.

“Jackson, mmm, close” you moan and Jackson lets go of your belly, reaching up to hold your hand. Your stomach muscles contract at the return of his fingers. There’s more this time, you aren’t even sure how many, but they’re stretching you so wonderfully, hitting your sweet spot every single time.

“Go ahead, baby. Come for me. Let it all go” Jackson coos, dragging his tongue up your clit. 

Seeing the love in his eyes, the passion, how badly he wants to please you, sends you crashing over the edge. You hold onto his hand, fingers interlaced with his, and ride out your high, letting your body move as it wishes. Jackson keeps dipping his fingers in and out of you, tongue flicking your clit, until you’ve come back down.

“You feel better, baby?” he asks, resting his head on a thigh more comfy than any pillow.

“Mmhmm” you answer between shallow breaths, “I feel wonderful.”

Jackson smiles, leaving a wet kiss on your other thigh, “We don’t have to go tonight, you know? Not if you don’t want to.”

“Actually, I…I wanna go.”

“Oh? Really?” he asks, equal parts shocked and curious about your newfound excitement for tonight. You sit up to pet his cheek, guiding him on top of you. You feel so safe under the weight of him, comforted by the arms now caging you into your little dip in the couch. 

“You believe in me so much, Jackson.” 

“I do.” 

“So, I guess it can’t hurt for me to try to believe in myself a little.” 

Jackson kisses you on the forehead, the nose, the lips. “And never fear the future. Whatever happens, I've got your back. I’ll do anything for you, you know that?" He shifts between your legs and you feel the head of his cock brush your clit. You bring him in for another kiss, wrapping your legs around his waist.

“Ya know, I might not wanna skip the party but it’s okay if we’re a little late, isn’t it?”

“Anything” he whispers, hips rocking against you, “For you.”

[familyvideostevie]

october twenty-sixth

day twenty-six: remus lupin you’ve been on three dates without a kiss. will today change that? | first kiss, early relationship, fluff | 1k

Three dates and Remus hasn’t kissed you.

Though your friends insist otherwise, you can’t help but wonder if there is something wrong with you.

He’s respectful, they tell you. He’s shy! You want to believe it. He’ll kiss you today.

God, you hope so.

Obviously, you could kiss him, but something in your gut tells you to let him make the move. It’s hard to resist though, as Remus is very kissable. He’s handsome in a way you don’t know how to describe. The scars on his face make him seem a bit severe but it’s cancelled out when you see the soft kindness of his eyes. He looks like someone who would give you directions in the middle of a rainstorm. He fills out his sweaters like they were tailor-made for him and his hands are huge.

And he’s tall, which you’re never opposed to.

And he likes to touch you. This is the main reason you haven’t given up hope on the kiss.

On your first date — a long afternoon of conversation at a coffee shop — he’d put his hand on your back on the way in and out, helped you take your coat off and held it out for you to put back on, and gave you a very lovely hug when you parted ways. On your second date he’d linked arms with you as you walked through a museum and held your hand when it got a little crowded.

He definetly likes you. Right?

Date three finds you at a bookshop. You’ve actually planned to go to a pub quiz down the road but you got the timing wrong and it doesn’t start for an hour, so you’re killing time.

There aren’t that many people milling around the stacks. Remus squeezes your hand and leaves you to browse on his own, which you appreciate. It can be kind of overwhelming to be under his gaze all the time, you’re learning. Maybe it’s just the force of your fancy, which is a bit outrageous after only three dates. You find yourself imagining him in your life — a couples Halloween costume, a fall weekend away, holiday parties and on New Year’s Eve.

Remus just makes it easy. He’s so…lovely.

So how can you get him to kiss you? It’s far too early for mistletoe. The bookstore is instead decorated with leaves and skulls and pumpkins. Maybe you’ll float the idea of a Halloween party, use some liquid courage to kiss him.

“Are you going to get anything?” Remus’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. He looks at you patiently.

“Oh,” you say. “Not sure, actually.”

He hums. “I think I’m going to grab this.” He holds up a book you’ve heard of but not read. “If it’s good I’ll pass it along to you. You sure I can’t get you anything?”

Of course he’s offering, of course he’s ready and willing to share with you. He’s infuriating. “No,” you say, smiling. “Thank you, though.”

He squeezes your hand. “I’ll be back in a moment.”

True to his word, which you are learning he tends to be, he’s back quickly, grabbing your hand once more and leading you back out into the cool evening. “Is there going to be food at this quiz?” he asks. “I’m peckish.”

“’Course there is,” you say. “I’m not taking you to a pub without food, Remus. I’m not that bad of a date.”

He laughs. It’s quickly becoming one of your favorite sounds. “I’d never think that. I hope you don’t expect us to win, though, because I’m hopeless at these.”

You scoff. “I don’t believe you.” Remus is very smart and very modest about it.

“No, I really am!” he says. “I know useless things only. You’ll have to come to one with me and James and Sirius —” you know them as his best friends based on how he talks about them “— because they get really into it. I know you’ll being them to victory where I always drag them down.”

“You don’t know that I’m good at pub quizzes, Remus.”

His eyes twinkle under the streetlights. “I’ve got a hunch.”

He wants you to meet his friends. The thought warms you.

The light on the crosswalk changes and you stand, hands clasped, waiting.

Fuck it. You’re going to do it. You’re going to kiss him. You take a breath and turn to him, lean in before you can second guess yourself —

Remus turns his head to say something and your foreheads smack together.

“Oh my god,” you say, rearing back. “Oh my god, I’m so —”

“Are you okay?” he asks, hand on his own forehead. “What just happened?”

He releases his grip on your fingers to gently grab the back of your head, tilting your face this way and that as if he’ll find a wound.

You flop your face onto his shoulder. “Please, leave me to die of embarrassment,” you mumble.

“Never,” he says. “Really, darling. Are you alright? Didn’t hit you too hard?” His tenderness is making your stomach do something funny. Darling, darling, darling.

“No, Remus,” you sigh. You pull back to look at him. He really does look concerned, bless him. “I’m fine. I was trying to kiss you.”

“Oh,” he says, looking slightly surprised. “Sorry, I suppose. That’s my fault.”

“Yes,” you grumble. “It is, considering you haven’t kissed me yet, which is why I was trying in the first place.”

Your embarrassment is making you brave.

His eyes light up again. “Do you want me to?” His tone is slightly teasing.

“Remus!” He laughs and cradles your face in his warm hands. This man always has warm hands even when it’s cold out.

“Alright, alright, let’s try this again, hm?”

He leans in slowly. Your eyes flutter shut. When he kisses you it’s a light press of his lips at first and then a firmer pressure as he slots your mouths together properly. You let him do the work and you sigh into it until he pulls away

Your foreheads press together gently this time. “Let’s try to avoid any more injuries, alright?”

You smack his chest. He laughs.

thank you for reading <3 reblog, send feedback, general masterlist here! promptober masterlist, find all fics under #fvspromptober23

[cmdrfupa]

Scary Dog Privilege

Ijichi x Reader

a/n: IJICHI BABES, WE ARE HERE.

Your relationship with Ijichi made sense.

If awards for couples that made the most sense existed, you and Ijichi would win them all.

He was the greyhound to your cane corso. The Sphynx to your Siamese cat. Ijichi was your devoted lover and you were his world.

You just wanted him to see his own value in every situation. Remind him that he has a say so even if everyone else disregards it. And maybe your anniversary trip could help him.

The suitcase lay half-packed on the bed, its contents a colorful jumble of folded clothes and travel essentials on top of the surprise bikini dress you’d packed for the beach.

You hummed cheerfully to yourself, holding up a sun hat and tilting your head. “What do you think, baby? Too much for the beach, or just enough to keep the mysterious wife thing up?”

Across the room, Ijichi stood awkwardly by the doorway, fiddling with the collar of his shirt. His gaze darted to you, then away, his lips parting as if to speak before closing again.

“It’s perfect,” he mumbled, though the way his fingers fidgeted with his glasses said his mind was elsewhere.

You narrowed your eyes at him, setting the hat down. “Kiyotaka,” you said in a tone that made him stand a little straighter. “You’ve been pacing like a nervous puppy for the last ten minutes. What happened today? Did someone die, or worse, did they cancel our anniversary reservation?”

He flinched. “No, no! Nothing like that!”

“Then what?”

Ijichi hesitated, his cheeks flushing. “I... um... I’ve been assigned as the lead administrator for a mission next week.”

The cheerful hum of excitement that had been buzzing in your chest came to a screeching halt. Slowly, you slipped your slippers back on and walked over to him. “Next week? As in, the week of our trip?”

He nodded, his hands wringing. “I-I didn’t say no. They said they needed someone dependable, and I—”

“Didn’t push back,” you finished for him, your tone flat. You let out a long sigh, and wrapped your arms around his next. “Honey. Do I need to come to these meetings and say ‘no’ for you?”

His shoulders slumped, and he gave you a sheepish look. “I know I worked through my day off last time but I didn’t want to let anyone down…”

You crossed your arms, giving him the look only an understanding wife could give. “Kiyotaka, I get it. You’re kind and genuinely such a pleasant guy —two of the many reasons I love you. But you’re also allowed to have a life outside of work. It’s okay to tell people no. Even me.”

“I know,” he muttered, but the doubt in his voice was as clear as day.

“Hmm,” you said, rolling up your sleeves and taking a few paces back. “Let’s roleplay.”

“Huh?”

“I’m Principal Yaga, and you’re telling me you can’t take the mission. Go.”

His eyes widened. “What? I—”

“Go!” you barked, dropping into a gruff impression of Yaga. You stroked an imaginary goatee and squinted at him. “Goddamn man! Speak up! I don’t have all day! I’ve got sunglasses to buy and cute cursed dolls to make!”

Ijichi blinked at you, flustered. “Um… excuse me, sir, but I…”

You interrupted, shaking your head dramatically while speaking in a hushed tone. “No excuses, Ijichi. You’re too valuable!”

That finally got a laugh out of him, and you couldn’t help but smile. “See? Not so scary when it’s just me,” you teased. “Now try again. Confidently, this time.”

He took a deep breath, straightening his shoulders.

“Principal Yaga, I appreciate the trust you’ve placed in me, but I’ve already committed to important personal plans next week. I’ll need to decline this mission but maybe ask Akari and she how she feels about taking it on.”

You broke into a grin, clapping your hands. “There it is! That’s my guy! See? You can do it!”

Ijichi looked surprised by his own success, a small, proud smile tugging at his lips. “You really think they’ll respect that?”

“Absolutely,” you said, stepping closer kissing his cheek then lips as he pulled you into a hug. “But if they don’t, just let me know. I’ll show up and demonstrate my cursed technique. Bet that’ll make them think twice.”

He chuckled, relaxing in your arms. “Thank you,” he murmured, his voice soft with gratitude.

“Anytime,” you replied, squeezing him gently. “Now, let’s finish packing. You’ve got a mission to refuse and an anniversary trip to enjoy.”

👓

The sun was dipping low over the courtyard, warm orange hues painted themselves across the campus.

You were heading back from a training session with Nanami when you spotted Ijichi standing stiffly near the fountain. Across from him, Gojo Satoru leaned lazily against the edge, arms crossed and trademark grin plastered across his face.

“C’mon, Ijichi,” Gojo drawled. “You’re the only guy I can trust with this. It’s just a couple of reports, nothing too crazy. Besides, you know I’d do it myself if I weren’t so…” He gestured vaguely. “Busy.”

You could see the classic Ijichi’s polite smile from where you stood. It was the same tight-lipped expression he used when he wanted to refuse but couldn’t find the words.

“Ah, well, I suppose I could…” he started, trailing off as Gojo’s grin widened.

That was enough for you. Without thinking, you marched over, planting yourself between the two of them.

Gojo,” you almost barked, sharply, staring him down. “I think you can handle this one yourself. Ijichi has enough on his plate and he has to speak with Yaga.”

Gojo raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. “Oh? Didn’t know the wife became the spokesperson! But come on, Ijichi’s the best man for the job! He loves this type of work!”

“Maybe,” you retorted, eyes squinting and arms crossed, “but even the best deserves a break. Right, Kiyotaka?”

Ijichi blinked, caught off guard. “I-I suppose…”

Gojo shrugged, raising his hands in mock surrender. “Fine, fine. You’re right. I’ll ask someone else.” With a cheeky grin, he sauntered off, calling over his shoulder, “But don’t think you’ve seen the last of me!”

You turned to Ijichi, a triumphant smile on your face. “There. Problem solved.”

But instead of looking relieved, he seemed troubled, his gaze fixed on the ground. “Thank you,” he muttered, barely audible.

🍵

Later that evening back at home, dinner was quiet. Ijichi kept conversation short and even excused himself early to go to his study.

“Jichi? Honey?” You softly called out as you made your way down the hall, a cup of fresh tea in hand for him as you peered at his relaxed figure from the cracked door of his study. “Can I come in?”

He smiled and waved you in, “Come in. Just reading.” He slipped the bookmark in and sat the book down. “Is that tea for me?”

You nodded and the cup it down before leaning against his desk. “Fresh ginger tea. With a bit of mint from the garden.”

He smiled and took a sip, the warmth filling his chest as he sat it back down. “Thank you darling.”

Watching him intently, you gave a warm smile. “What’s on your mind?”

He hesitated, then sighed. “About earlier… with Gojo. I know you meant well, and I appreciate you stepping in, but…” He looked up at you, his expression pained. “I don’t want people to think I can’t fend for myself.”

You frowned, guilt tugging at your chest. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way.” He saw you thumbing with the edge of his desk and stood up, bringing his hands to your waist. “I’m just really not a big fan of seeing people take advantage of you.”

“I know,” he said softly. “But sometimes I need to handle things on my own, even if I mess up sometimes.” His gentle disposition was the sweetest. A level headed man even when he was feeling bogged. “Gojo can be a lot and you were right, I didn’t have the capacity for the work he was trying to pass on to me. But I would’ve figured it out.”

You nodded, rubbing up and down his forearms as you looked to see his unperturbed face. “You’re right. From now on, I’ll let you decide when and if you need me to step in. But if it ever gets too much…”

“I’ll tell you,” he finished, offering a small smile. “I appreciate that you care so much for me. You are my life. And knowing I have you in my corner is enough to make me speak up more. So when I need you, I’ll tell you..”

“Deal?” you asked, holding out your pinky.

He chuckled, linking his pinky with yours. “Deal.”

A playful grin spread across your face. “But you’ve got to admit, I rattled Gojo pretty well.”

Ijichi laughed, his cheeks flushing. “You did. Honestly, I think he’s a little scared of you now.”

“As he should be,” you said proudly, resting your chin on his shoulder as he swayed you for a moment. “But don’t worry—I’ll save my scary side for when you really need it.”

He smiled against the top of your head, his arms wrapping around you as he pressed a kiss to your crown. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You’d probably have a lot less drama in your life,” you teased, earning another laugh.

“You make things more lively. I’d be a lost man without it.”

The moment lingered, warm and sweet, the tension from earlier melting away. Ijichi knew you meant every word. Your devotion to him was truly a gift and you were always going to be the reason he felt like a winner.

[nadvs]

Do you think even though obx is ending the rafe fandom on here will still be prominent? I’m scared bc I literally just worked up enough courage and confidence to start writing for him on here but now I think it’s too late bc everyone will move on and won’t be as active in the community anymore.

i think so!! of all the fandoms i’ve been in, this is one of the most active. i joined in february between seasons and even then, i was so surprised to see how many rafe girls we got here 🙂‍↕️

we have until the end of next season for the show to be airing and i think the fandom will continue to be active. i have heard that across tumblr in general that fic interactions are going down though. i’m not sure if it’s readers leaving or just not interacting with what they read. my numbers have dropped drastically and it’s easy to fall into the trap of comparing and feeling sad about lack of feedback and support, but it’s important to remember writing is all about having fun. i once had a side-blog with like 50 followers and was writing a 25k word fic that had seven readers following it lol but i was having a good time and that’s what matters 🥰 that being said though, PSA TO READERS TO PLS SUPPORT WRITERS WITH COMMENTS AND REBLOGS!! IT’S WHAT KEEPS US GOING!!

my advice is if you want to write, do!! it is not too late. there are fandoms for old movies and cancelled shows that are still v active because the fans keep it alive 🙂‍↕️ even if the rafe fandom slows down, there will always be people who want to read and write for it, so don’t let it stop you from writing and don’t be shy to reach out and make friends 💘

[rapz-rites]

Family Time

Damian Wayne x Reader Headcanon

Meeting Damian’s family and getting close with them

A/N: This is my first time writing ANYTHING so plz be nice. I won't do any major writings, just small head canons and maybe rabbles. Saving the big stuff for all you professional writers.

Word Count: 1,704

Warnings: Jealous Damian, injured reader, threats, implied smut

Meeting the Waynes

You and Damian have been dating for about 5 months now.

Damian has already met your parents and they LOVED HIM.

He was polite, respectable and always said the right things at the right moment. DAMN HIM!

Now it was time to meet his family.

You’re pacing back and forth questioning your entire existence while Damian is sitting on the edge of your bed trying to calm you down.

“Do my clothes look good enough? Does my hair look good? What if they think I’m with you for your money? What if they think that I’m a gold digger? Do they know that my family is also very wealthy? What if they think I’m a stuck up spoiled brat? OMG WHAT IF THEY HATE ME?”

You’re digging yourself a deep hole of negativity until Damian grabs you by your shoulders forcing you to look at him.

“Beloved. You’re going to be fine. Everything about you is perfect and my family will love you”

He always knew what to say and when. DAMN HIM!

“Thank you. Ok. I think I’m ready, let's go!”

As damian pulls up to the manor, you start to rethink your decision

“Is it too late to cancel lunch? Would they believe I suddenly got ill?”

“Beloved, as I said before they’re going to love you”

As always he was right.

You and his family immediately hit it off and got along well.

A little too well for his liking.

He knew his family would like you but what he didn’t know was that you would spend more time with them instead of him. DAMN HIM!

Bruce

Bruce loved you for his youngest son

Damian as had a girlfriend before, Raven, but after they broke up, he thought Damian would never open himself up to anyone again

Even though you and Damian are a kind of opposites and balance each other out, you understand him and what he’s gone through

He was the one of the first people, after your parents and Alfred, to learn about your relationship

Though business isn’t your first option as a major, you still want to learn as a backup

Who better to learn from than the man who runs on of the top companies in the country

Bruce offers to teach you the basics and even a small internship at WE

You refuse the internship but gladly take the lessons

Dick

Dick is an acrobat

You did gymnastics for 4 year

What could go wrong?

A LOT

Dick tries to teach you a double full out

You already perfected a full out

You’ve always had trouble perfecting your landings

It didn’t come a surprise to you when you were able to perfectly do the flip but mess up the landing to bad you twist your ankle

Damian is furious with Grayson for teaching you suck a difficult move knowing there was a chance of you getting hurt

Damian is about to lunge at Dock ready to attack until you stop him

“Damian, stop. I’ve twisted my ankle plenty of times trying new gymnastic moves. I’ll be fine in like 2 weeks. You don’t need to hurt Dick, I knew the risks”

“Ok. But if Grayson teaches you another move and you get hurt, he will need to sleep with both eyes open”

Normally, Dick would be somewhat frightened by one of Damian’s threats but he’s in shock from how quickly you calmed him down

He’s going to call you from now on everytime Damian is angry

Jason

You and Jason connect over your interests in books

You two form your own book club

You two discuss the book you picked out for the month and talk about many other books you two have read in the past

Both of you love to read a book and watch the movie/show that goes along with it

You two argue over which aspects were better in the book or the movie/show

“Elena and Katherine are blonde in the books though”

“I know that Jason. I read the book too. But let’s be honest Katherine is better as a brunette than a blonde. It fits her personality in the show way more.”

“You’re right.”

“I think it’s Nina Dobrev.”

“It definitely is.”

“I would have liked to see angel Elena though.”

“ME TOO!”

Tim

Tim had a nack for tech

You were attached to your phone

Of course you two got along

Tim taught you tricks on the computer and showed you secret games companies hide

You had learned from Damian that Tim was a bit of a caffeine addict

Damian’s words were “Drake will be the caffeine addicted idiot in front of a screen or head deep in a case”

You take it upon yourself to find caffeine substitutes to try and help his addiction

He is reluctant at first but gives it a try

After a few months Tim is drinking less coffee than before

He still drinks coffee but limits himself to only 3 cups a day, much better than 2 an hour

He drinks more water and gets in more sleep than before

Damian who never openly admit it but he’s happy his older brother is being healthier and taking better care of himself

Duke

You and Duke bonded over your similar senses of humor

It also helps that he’s also on TikTok as much as you

The two of you jokingly talk in TikTok lingo

“Bombastic side eye”

“Criminal offense side eye”

“Duke this is probably the most important question I’m about to ask… Team Hailey or Team Selena”

“I’m offended that you even have to ask. Team Selena til the day I die. Alex Russo practically raised me”

Everyone else is looking at the two of you confused

Damian is used to this already

When you asked him the same question you went on a 3 hour tangent and it was evident who’s side you were on

Damian didn’t care about “silly celebrity drama” but since he knew it would make you happy, he chose Selena

Cass

Cass is a pretty quiet girl, almost mute

With family she barely ever talks, with strangers she uses sign language

Once you learned Cass communicated mostly with sign language you took it upon yourself to learn

When you we were first introduced to Cass you signed

“Hi! My name is Y/N, you must be Cass. My sign is rusty, I’m still learning. Nice to meet you”

Cass gave you a small smile and you were ecstatic

According to Damian Cass almost never smiles and even if she does its for a split second

You both enjoy each others quiet company, watching movies or painting nails and braiding hair with Stephanie

The more time you and spend with Cass the more she opens up to you

After a few months, she starts giving you short answers without signing

“If you could only wear one color nail polish for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?”

“Black…”

“Good answer”

Steph

You and Steph connect as feminists

“Anything a boy can do we can do better”

Steph often includes you in any competitions he has that are girls vs boys

Does she include you because you can be used against Damian?

Yes

Are you upset about it?

Absolutely not

Why?

You love beating Damian in any possible way

Other than competitions, you both love pranking the boys

You two prank damian the least because you know well enough that damian can hold grudge and you love to cuddle at night

Pranking Tim is best

Before he got better he would fall for anything because he was too sleep deprived

He would fall for the simplest broken screen video on youtube almost every time

Once he started getting better, you two had to up your game

Your favorite prank on Tim was the fake virus that played the SHrek opening over and over on blast

Alfred

You couldn’t forget about Alfred now can you

Whenever you enter the manor Alfred is always the first one to greet you

Whenever you are waiting for Damian at the manor you go straight to Alfred and talk with him

You often assist him with whatever he’s doing

Baking, cooking, cleaning

He finds it refreshing a young person would help him

The others would try and help but often with miss up and make some kind of mess

One year they tried to make Alfred’s favorite cake for his birthday… and failed… miserably

They didn't include Damian because eventually he would take over and the cake would basically be made by him and not all of them, although he would’ve made it perfectly. DAMN HIM!

After 3 failed attempts they opted to buy a cake they knew Alfred would like from his favorite bakery downtown

Though they ruined the kitchen, Alfred was touched at the effort they put to try and make his favorite cake

Even though, none of them, except Damian, are allowed to cook or bake in the kitchen without his supervision

Back to Damian

It soon becomes evident as you spend more time with his family that Damian is jealous

Damian loves that you get along with his family, but he misses the quality time between just the two of you

You felt bad because you thought you were neglecting your boyfriend

So you made the executive decision to make it up to him

“My parents are out of town for the next two weeks”

“Business trip?”

“Yup. Do you want to spend the week?”

“No siblings?”

“Nope just you”

You lean in placing a soft kiss on his lips and pull back

You giggle when you see him lean in for more and he gives you an unamused look on his face because you refused to kiss him back

“So do you want to spend the week? We’ll have the place all to ourselves”

“Let's go. I already have my bag packed”

That entire week is just you and Damian hanging out and enjoying each others company

You give him all the kisses and cuddles he wants

He even knows just want to say to get more 😉

DAMN HIM!

OMG OMG OMG!!! I did it. Took me a hot minute but I got it done. I wish it was this easy with my assignments and homework. But I hope you enjoyed this.

[kreumiya]

★・ i'd let you read my mind!!

A short scenario if you and Sunday were both Halovian and he reads your mind while communicating telepathically when you deny that you were ever going to take him on a date as a joke when he comes late. :) 

Perhaps asking Sunday out on a date wasn’t the best idea. After all, you were a part of the family and had to uphold some kind of values. Asking your pretty boss out on a date was definitely not one of them. Not like you cared anyway. 

Holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and a box of some mystery cupcakes that you had bought from some kid on the bustling streets of penacony, you walked through his long and winding hallways, solved the weird puzzles he had set up (they were actually quite hard but you’d gotten used to them) and into his office. Not many people were able to go into there unless they had a special appointment, but you were an exception. The only exception. 

“Sunday!” you called out. Somehow he was always cooped up in this office, it ought to be lonely sometimes – well maybe all the time… You paused. No answer. “Excuse me? Sunday…?” You yelled out again. Any longer and you were going to get quite annoyed.One of the only times when you could meet him and he’s out somewhere? You’ve got to be kidding me… “Uh-hum,” you cleared your throat, “Mr Sunday, leader of the Oak family and Representative of Penacony you have a visitor!” A few minutes passed and … no reply. You had specifically told him you were coming in 3 system hours. 

Screw it, you sighed, placing your gifts behind your chair and taking a seat on one of his plush velvet chairs. “If you don’t come now, I’ll eat all these cupcakes…” Pause. Silence. This room was genuinely like a prison, you couldn’t fathom how he could spend all of his days locked up in this place by himself like a bird in a cage. An hour passed by… 

And all of a sudden, the doors opened wide. “I’m so sorry, I’m late. I got caught up in some business.” 

“Late by an hour?” you sighed dramatically, “oh whatever shall I do? All my plans have been cancelled because I’ve waited here for so long.” You sulked, knowing full well that you did not have any other plans lined up for the entire week. “I had something planned for the two of us to do, but I guess not anymore…” you averted your gaze while suppressing a grin. 

He took a seat next to you, “what did you plan for us to do?” he asked thoughtfully, taking your hand in his and placing a kiss on it. 

“Ah well, since you came so late, I’ve had to cancel the plans,” you wistfully shook your head, trying to hide the fat bouquet of flowers behind your chair. “There’s not much I can do…” you began to get up before you heard something in your head. Sunday hadn’t been speaking but you had heard him trying to communicate with you telepathically, Damn Halovian powers… you smiled. 

So what is it?

Now all your thoughts would be relayed to him…

It was a date!! I wasn’t actually going to cancel it. I saw that you were pretty scared when I said I cancelled all my plans. I definitely tricked you didn’t I?

You shot him a beaming smile. Knowing full well that you did not trick him, you definitely forgot that Halovians were able to communicate telepathically, and that bouquet peeking out from behind your chair definitely didn’t help at all.

“Here you go,” you passed him the bouquet and then the box of cupcakes. “Now let’s go! We’re already running behind schedule by 1 hour and 14 minutes, we still have a lot to do you know!” You held his hand as you ran down the hallways while his other arm carried the bouquet and the half melted cupcakes. 

“Today will be a long day,” he laughed. 

i am actually so starved of sunday content and leaks its so sad

[seinahirai]

『 Blinded Haze 』 Bada Lee x Reader

summary: bada’s been stressed lately, so you decide to surprise her.

word count: 1.6k

contents: smut, dom!bada, sub!reader, reader gets a bit self conscious, bada takes care of that, hickeys, blindfolding, sex toys, fingering, bada licks your cum off her fingers, implication of aftercare

disclaimer: the images are only for aesthetics and are not depicted as what reader’s body looks like ‼️

you know how stressed bada’s been the past few weeks, with the concerts and performances, on top of having to teach classes back at justjerk.

she was finally getting a day off tomorrow, so you figured, what better way to greet her than with lingerie?

bada herself said that sex with you always made her feel better, that feeling your warm body against hers while in a post orgasmic haze was like heaven.

that lead you to the idea of surprising her with some old lingerie you found in your closet and taking out your box of sex toys and leaving it on the bed so she could choose what she wanted to do to you.

you also know that her favorite thing to do after sex is cuddle and eat snacks, so you went out and bought all of her favorite snacks and left them near the nightstand for when you were finished.

now all you had to do was wait, which was easier said than done.

you had finished all the preparations about an hour before bada usually came home, which gave you a lot of time to think.

and when you have a lot of time to think, you most likely begin to overthink, which is exactly what you started to do.

the more time that passed, the more your mind began to flood with thoughts like “what if she doesn’t find me attractive in this lingerie” or “what if she’s too tired to have sex and i got ahead of myself?”

after a while, you were ready to just cancel everything altogether, when you heard the familiar sound of keys jingling and the door opening.

you froze in your spot, taking a deep breath before getting up to greet bada.

you made your way to the door, feeling a bit nervous as you watched her come through the door.

nonetheless, you smile and give her a hug after she takes her coat off and puts her stuff down.

“hey, baby.” she says, giving you a kiss on the lips before stepping back to fully look at you.

that was when she realized what you were wearing, and when she did realize, she did nothing but stare for a few seconds.

realistically, it should have been obvious that she was admiring how beautiful your body looked, but with your previous session of overthinking, you couldn’t help but feel even more self conscious.

“fuck, you look…”

“i can take it off if you’re not in the mood.”

you say quickly, avoiding bada’s gaze as you fidget with your fingers.

at that, bada gives you a confused look before stepping closer to you and gently pulling you in by the waist.

“baby, i’ll always be in the mood for you. i told you this already.” she leans in to kiss you, and you wrap your arms around her neck to deepen it.

after a few seconds you pull away, still avoiding her eyes.

“i know, it’s just…you’ve been really tired lately, and it’s been a while since you’ve seen me in lingerie. i guess i just got a little self conscious…”

bada chuckles a bit at that, bringing a thumb to your chin and lifting it up, making you look at her.

“baby, you’re absolutely stunning with or without the lingerie. truthfully, you didn’t even need it to turn me on.” she says, pressing soft kisses on your neck as her hands begin to explore your body.

“do you know how many times i’ve had to excuse myself to the bathroom because i’ve gotten horny at just the thought of you?” she whispers against the skin of your collarbone before pressing a few more kisses there.

you sigh softly, tangling your fingers in her hair as you lean your head back to give her easier access.

she begins gently sucking on the soft skin of your neck as one of her hands begin to grope one of your tits, her thumb flicking your nipple through the thin material of the lingerie.

you let out a whine, gasping softly at the feeling of her hands on your tits.

after a few more seconds of bada sucking on your neck, she pulls away and admires the sight of your neck now covered in hickeys.

“how about we take this to the bedroom?” she says, and you only nod, letting her lead you to your shared bedroom.

when you walk into the room, bada seems amused at the sight of your box of sex toys sitting on the bed.

“you can use anything in there on me tonight.” you say, and she looks down at you with a smirk on her face.

“anything?”

you nod, taking her hand and guiding her to the bed. “i wanted to surprise you.”

bada scans through the box, looking at all the different options before her eyes stop on one thing in particular.

the blindfold.

she’s never used the blindfolds on you before, so she saw this as an opportunity to do so. she took the blindfold out, her eyes meeting yours as if to confirm that this was okay to use on you.

when you give her a nod, she smiles and beckons you to come closer, which you do quite eagerly. she gently ties the blindfold around your eyes, double checking to make sure it wasn’t too tight.

it does feel slightly strange to not be able to see what bada’s doing, but you trust her with your life so it doesn’t bother you too much.

you hear her take something else out of the box before moving it to the floor.

“what else did you get?” you ask, your head turning in the direction of the noise.

“you’re blindfolded for a reason, princess.” she says, and you can imagine the smirk on her face as she says it.

you pout slightly, but mumble an “okay” as you lay down on the bed.

you feel bada spread your legs apart, chuckling softly at the sight of your dripping cunt. “your pretty pussy is already so wet for me.”

you whine pathetically, her words only making you even more wet.

“don’t worry baby, i’m gonna take good care of this pussy.”

she begins kissing your inner thigh, her lips leaving the same marks they left on your neck. after a few moments, she looks up at you through the opening of your thighs (not that you could see her lustful gaze).

“you ready, baby?” she asks, pressing one last kiss to your inner thigh.

after you nod eagerly, you hear a noise that sounds like something being turned on, but before you can think anything of it, you feel a vibrating sensation on your clit, making you moan out loudly as you instinctively close your thighs at the sudden pleasure.

bada quickly forces your thighs back open, pressing the vibrator to your clit once more. “don’t run from it, baby.” she says, smirking at the way you squirm around.

bada reaches her hand out to yours, letting you squeeze it as you moan loudly from the pleasure. the fact that you couldn’t see anything only seemed to make you more sensitive.

your hold on bada’s hand only becomes tighter when she turns up the setting on the vibrator without warning. you let out stuttered moans and whines as she coos softly at the sight of your pussy clenching around nothing.

“aww, does my pretty baby wanna be filled up?” she pulls her hand away from yours, and before you can whine about it, you feel two fingers pushing into your pussy, making you gasp in pleasure as you dig your nails into the sheets.

bada immediately begins thrusting her fingers in and out of your sopping cunt, not giving you any time to adjust to the penetration.

“good girl, taking me so well.” she praises, and it only seems to make you even louder.

you feel the familiar sensation of your orgasm approaching, but you can’t form the words to let bada know. luckily, she can already tell from the way your walls tighten around her fingers.

“are you close, pretty girl? here, let me help you.”

bada’s fingers press up against the spongey part of your pussy while her other hand turns the vibrator up onto the 3rd setting.

you cry out pathetically as your orgasm washes over you, your thighs trembling your hands gripping the sheets tightly.

bada continues the move her fingers, fucking you through your orgasm and the overstimulation of it all brings you to tears.

when bada notices it looks like you’ve had enough, she slides her fingers out of you and turns the vibrator off, bringing her fingers to her lips to clean off your cum and wetness.

“you taste so good, baby.” she says, bringing her face to your cunt to lick up all your cum, making you whine loudly.

bada chuckles and lays down next to you, taking off the blindfold and smiling at your hazed expression when you open your eyes.

“there’s my pretty girl.” she says softly, grabbing your cheeks and kissing you deeply before pulling you into a hug, wrapping her arms around you tightly.

she sighs at the feeling of your bodies against each other, having missed the feeling of intimacy.

after a few minutes, you mumble something incoherently, nuzzling your cheek further onto bada’s neck.

bada giggles, finding you adorable. “what’s that, baby? i can’t hear you.”

you repeat your mumbling, but bada can faintly make out the words “snacks” and “nightstand”.

bada glances over to the nightstand next to your bed, smiling softly when she sees the bag full of snacks. she had completely missed it earlier.

“aww, baby. you’re so sweet.” bada coos, kissing you on the cheek once more.

“i love you, bada.” you whisper, giving her a lopsided smile.

“i love you more, baby.”

[traumasurvivors]

Here's a link to a blog post on my personal website on a topic that I think is very important.

I've also put it below the read more for people that don't like external links.

When it comes to healing from trauma, there are a lot of emotions an individual may feel. One of these emotions is anger. Anger is one of the emotions I see invalidated the most. For example, I’ve been told that being angry is “letting the person who hurt me win.” I’ve been told that I’m only hurting myself with my anger and that it’s holding me back from healing. All of these assumptions were wrong.

Anger is often viewed as a bad thing because it can drive a lot of unpleasant behaviours but it can be used for good. While anger can hurt you and others, it doesn’t have to. There is a difference between destructive anger and constructive anger. Destructive anger is often expressed in a way that causes harm to yourself or others whereas constructive anger can be used to better understand your situation and figure out your needs. Constructive anger can be a way to show respect for yourself.

For example, if you’re in a situation with a friend where they do something that makes you angry (for example: cancelling plans, forgetting an important date, etc), constructive anger may involve you stepping away from the situation to figure out the cause of your anger (for example: you feel their actions imply you’re not important to them) so that you can then sit down with your friend and communicate in a calm manner. This may allow your relationship to grow and build with a better understanding of each other. Destructive anger in this situation may involve you yelling at your friend and insulting them, which will likely damage or destroy the relationship. If the hurt your friend has caused makes you want to re-evaluate your friendship, this is valid and there are still constructive ways to end a friendship that will cause the least amount of hurt for all involved. It is also important to note that ignoring the anger and bottling up is likely to cause a bigger blow up down the line or cause “overreactions” to other circumstances.

If anger is bottled up, it can end up coming out unintentionally. You might find you’re getting much angrier at everyday annoyances and disagreements than you might think reasonable. People might push you away or respond badly to your anger, because they feel they do not deserve it - and looking back later, you might feel they don’t deserve it, either. However, because of the anger you’re holding back, you can’t see that in the moment. This is why it is important to think and consider your anger, and listen to what it’s trying to tell you. I have found asking questions of myself to analyze my anger can help, such as in an anger inventory like this one.

While many people see anger as an emotion that causes people to lash out and destroy things, anger can also help to motivate people to create new things. Marches to “Take back the night”, or for “gay pride” have much of their motivation based in anger at injustice and oppression. New laws to better protect survivors of domestic abuse or otherwise help society are often driven by people feeling a huge amount of anger. Properly harnessed, anger can help to take action to change things for the better.

On a more personal level, anger can also be a motivator to improve one’s own life. Many people have used the anger they felt at those who put them down as a motivation toward success. That success might be completing schooling, winning an international athletic competition or publishing a novel. One thing all of those have in common is that they are rarely possible to do with only a little time or a little effort. They are time-consuming tasks which usually require months if not years of work. They can be easy to give up on without motivation - and for many, anger is a big help to keeping that motivation.

It took me years to feel anger. For the first while, I felt ashamed, guilty and like I deserved the abuse I’d endured. Feeling angry at the people responsible for this was a step in my healing. I began putting the blame on those responsible and not myself. I was realizing that I did not deserve to be treated in the harmful ways that I was. This was huge to me as someone that had spent years thinking I deserved my trauma and as a result, future trauma and abuse as well.

There were instances where my anger was destructive, mostly to myself. I engaged in self-harm as a way to vent my anger and it also caused problems in my relationship at the time because I held my anger in and would get really frustrated and project my anger onto my relationship which was not fair to my partner.

Over the years, I’ve learned to cope with my anger more efficiently. What works for someone is largely dependent on them and their needs. For me, it was a literal punching bag to vent out frustrations and journaling. It was sitting down with my anger and treating it like a friend trying to protect me (because it was in a way). It was listening to it and finding the cause. My true anger came from those who hurt me, and in a way, took a part of me. My anger largely came from grief and betrayal. Understanding where it came from did not make it disappear, but it did offer me perspective and allow me to better manage it.

For some, anger is a cover up for other emotions. It becomes a defense mechanism against feeling the sadness, hurt and other emotions that a person does not want to feel. The anger is just the first layer and understanding where that anger comes from, and that the anger is a cover up is a great step in moving beyond it. Feeling the emotions beneath it will play a big part in moving beyond the anger.

Anger is a valid and understandable emotion when it comes to healing from trauma, even if your trauma does not have a specific person to blame (natural disasters and death of a loved one are examples). If the person who hurt you did not mean to or did not know better (like another child), anger is still a valid emotion. You’ve been hurt and you should not have been and it is reasonable to feel angry at this.

For a lot of us, anger plays a part in our healing. And that’s okay! You’re allowed to feel angry. Anger becomes an issue when you allow it to consume you and hurt you or others. The feeling itself is not inherently bad, and it can actually be a good thing. Your anger can be used to help you. It’s what you do with your anger that decides whether it’s helpful to you or not. When I was first told that my anger was “letting the other person win,” I believed that and felt invalidated. I have since realized that my anger has been an important part in understanding my pain and my needs. My anger is not letting someone else win, but letting me win, by helping me to heal.

[lulublack90]

Prompt 29 - Climb

@jegulus-microfic October 29, Word count 881

Previous part First part

He couldn’t believe how many compliments Sirius had given him. He had no idea how to react to the praise, so he just nodded and smiled quick little smiles. He’d grabbed James’s hand at some point but couldn’t remember when. All he knew was that he couldn’t let go. He found it strangely calming, that simple touch. He felt confident enough with it to say a few things to his brother, even if they were only one or two-word answers. 

“So where are you living now?” Sirius asked him after returning his sketchbook. He chewed his lip for a moment, knowing what Sirius was really asking. 

“In the Halls. It’s noisy, but…” But it wasn’t Grimmauld Place. He couldn’t go back there. His parents had thrown him out right before uni had started, cancelling all his fees. Luckily, the university had been understanding and let him start his studies and move into his room on the understanding that if he didn’t get the student loan, he would owe them for back payments. It had been the scariest time in his life, but it had all worked out in the end. 

“We loved Halls, didn’t we, Prongs? So many people to prank,” Sirius sighed nostalgically. 

“Yeah, but everyone knew it was us. I think the Prefects were glad to see the back of us,” James laughed. 

“W-w-what about you?” Regulus asked, wincing when he stuttered. Sirius looked at him sadly, remembering what had happened to Regulus at home if he dared to stutter within hearing of their mother. 

“Up until a few weeks ago, I lived here. That was my room,” Sirius said, pointing at a door just visible from the living room. 

“Why did you move out?” Regulus asked, his head filling with too many scenarios about James and his string of lovers and other highly upsetting things. 

“Remus and I got a place together,” Sirius shrugged. Regulus guessed there was more, but Sirius didn't elaborate.

“Hey, Pads, come help me make more tea,” James had stood up while the brothers were talking and started collecting their used cups.

“What, why?” Sirius whined. “Why can’t you do it yourself? It’s only three cups of tea,” James leaned over, his nose almost touching Sirius’s and said very slowly. 

“Mum sent over one of her chocolate cakes,” Sirius was out of his chair and racing towards the kitchen before James could stand up straight. 

“Oi, Prongs, takeaway tonight? Reggie, you're staying.” Sirius said, coming back into the living room with a mouthful of chocolate cake. Regulus was relieved that Sirius had told him he was staying rather than asking if he wanted to. “I’ve put the kettle on,” He told James as he went to sit back down. 

“Great, and now you can get cake for everyone and not just yourself,” James ordered, grabbing Sirius by the back of his shirt and preventing him from sitting. Sirius screwed up his face and mumbled profanity at James as James pushed him into the kitchen. Regulus couldn’t help the smile that spread across his face. He sighed and leaned back, tilting his head into the cushions and closing his eyes. He was exhausted. A lot had happened in the last few hours. 

The front door opened again and a tired-looking, very tall man wandered in, yawning widely, his eyes half shut. He dropped his bag and flung himself across the sofa, his head landing in Regulus’s lap, while his arms wrapped around his waist. Regulus froze. The man froze too. He craned his neck back, staring up into Regulus’s face. 

“You are not Sirius,” He stated. Regulus shook his head. 

“Moony, Regulus. Regulus, Moony,” Sirius introduced them, not seemingly bothered by the fact that Remus was currently sprawled over Regulus. 

“Hi,” Regulus said quietly. 

“Moony's my nickname. You can call me that, or Remus. Whichever you prefer,” Remus told him gently before untangling himself from Regulus and going to greet Sirius. He kissed Sirius on the lips but yanked his head away as soon as they’d made contact and stared at him. 

“It’s in the kitchen,” Sirius said, and then Remus was gone. A groan came from the kitchen a second later and Sirius snorted. 

“Remus loves Effie’s cake more than he loves me,” Regulus now realised that Remus was Sirius's boyfriend. That made a bit more sense. 

“I’m sorry,” He blurted out. “He was on me before I could stop him,” He really hoped Sirius wouldn't be offended and told him to get out. But Sirius shrugged it off.

“It’s fine, don’t worry,” 

Remus and James came back with the tea things and plates of chocolate cake. James sat back with Regulus on the sofa, while Sirius took his chair again. Remus hesitated a second before he chose to climb onto Sirius’s lap, obscuring Sirius until he got himself settled. Grinning down at his large slice of cake. This was the weirdest tea party Regulus had ever been to. 

“So, Chinese for dinner?” James asked, sliding his hand into Regulus’s again. Regulus nodded at him as he took a bite of the chocolate cake James handed him. He let out a groan. 

“It’s the best, right?” Remus said, grinning at him. Regulus had no words, so continued to nod as he took another bite.

Next part

[mysunshinetemptress]

Everything in between

Your Royals Support p3

Leah Williamson x royal!reader

A/n I’m so sorry I haven’t posted, I hit a wall but have since been spending all my free time writing so here is the first of many promised stories. And to begin I thought why not start with the end

Leah had woken to the sound of you vomiting for the second morning in a row, sighing she got out of the bed before trying the door handle only to see it’s locked “love you ok, will u open the door for me.” She was met with the sound of you vomiting once more before you groaned “trust me Le you don’t want to come in.” Leah shook her head “trust me I do, I want to make sure your ok.” You sighed sitting back before opening the door “oh Y/n.” You shook your head “I don’t know what’s wrong with me I felt fine two days ago.” Leah sighed moving towards you and bending down before pushing the hair out of your face “it’s ok, maybe you should cancel your engagement for today.” You shook your head a look of disappointment in your eye “I can’t it’s for a charity event Le, I’m riding with Zara to raise money for charity today I can’t… I promised Pa that I would do it for the princes trust.” Leah shushed you pulling you close to her “it’s ok hey Y/n relax ok it will be ok they will understand.” You shook your head “I’m not pulling out I’ve done it feeling a lot worse then I do now.” Leah sighed knowing there was no talking you out of it. “Ok but you let Zara know if you need to come off that horse at anytime.” You nodded “I promise.”

You where stood in the stable checking over Hale-Bopp comet and his tack before nodding to your groom that you where happy with everything and ready to go. Zara stood next to you holding your helmet as you both talked over the course and discussed the strides between each jump before she looked at you concerned “hey you ok.” You looked at her confused “yeah just nervous l, want to ride my best.” Zara smiled squeezing your hand “you can do this in your sleep you will be fine.”

Walking over to Hale-Bopp comet you put your leg back as Zara lifted you up and you swung your leg over the saddle before adjusting your stirrups and checking his girth. “Ready.” You looked down at your older cousin “ready.” She smiled patting Hale-Bopps hind before wishing you good luck as you trotted into the arena as the commentator read out your name.

You began at the start of the bell taking of towards the first jump clearing it before turning to take the double, it wasn’t until you got to the water tray that you felt the need to vomit, you shook your head slightly pushing Hale-Bopp on before a wave of dizziness took over, you tilted your head slightly trying to clear it as you head towards the double oxer to finish the course. Slowing Hale-Bopp you felt the world spin as you waved at the crowd heading towards the gate where you could just make out Zara, passing the the gate you took your feet out of the stirrups and let go of the reins you could tell Zara was trying to say something to you but couldn’t make out a word as you felt your body tilt no longer able to keep your eyes open as you slid off the 17.1 hands horse. Zara let out a shout as she caught you before placing you on the ground and shaking you. “Y/n, hey Y/n come on wake up.” The paramedics raced over just as you regained consciousness, feeling groggy “Leah.” Zara shook her head “I’ll call her now, I’ll get her to meet us at the hospital.” You groaned as the paramedics began getting you ready to head to the hospital.

Leah raced down the hall before finding Zara stood outside your door “Zara, Y/n is she ok.” Zara looked up from her phone smiling at the younger blonde, pulling her into a hug “she’s fine, promise but she’ll fill you in.” Leah looked at Zara confused as she was pulled in for another hug by the older girl, before she let go and burst through the door to see you sat up on the bed dressed in you jodhpurs and shirt. “Your ok.” You looked up from the bed focused on fixing your shirt, Leah felt worry course through her as your eyes began to fill with tears “hey whatever it is we can fix it, we will get through it together ok, hey it’s me and you.” You mumbled into her shoulder as Leah hummed “what.” You picked your head up looking into her eyes as you shook your head “it’s me, you and our baby.” Leah looked at you confused before a look of shock took over her features “Baby, you mean, your….it…hold on.” You laughed grabbing Leah’s face “I’m pregnant Le, we are going to have a baby it worked.” Leah felt her eyes prick with tears as she pulled you in for a kiss “ we are having a baby oh my god.” You laughed looking at the door as Zara came running in “oh I’m so happy for you both ahhh I can’t wait for a little baby in the family again.” You both laughed resting your head into Leah’s chest as smiled at Zara.

Both yourself and Leah decided to keep it between the both of you and Zara until you where at least 12 weeks along after that your father the king had to be told first before you could tell anyone else. To say he was excited was an understatement the man harped on for a solid two hours about how happy he was for you both and how proud he was of you, next you told both your brothers, Harry Via FaceTime and William when you invited himself and Late over for dinner, both brothers where equally excited for you telling you how much of an amazing mum you where going to be as well as Leah.

Telling Leah’s family was a lot less formal something you really loved, you both had decided to buy a small England jersey with Williamson on the back as well as three England jerseys saying Grandma and Grandpa as well as one for Jacob saying uncle before heading around for dinner. Leah was like a child on Christmas the entire way through the meal, her leg shaking next to yours in excitement and anticipation, had placed your hand on her thigh several minutes ago but nothing seemed to stop it. Half way through dinner your wife simply couldn’t wait any longer, jumping up from her half eaten meal Leah raced to get the bag you had left at the hall door before running back into the room “I’m sorry, I can’t wait any longer…I know your all still eating but for five minutes just wait and I’ll give out your presents.” Amanda looked at you laughing shaking her head at Leah’s excitement “I hope you cleared this with Y/n Bubba.” Leah looked at you sheepishly “well we where supposed to wait but I can’t hold in any longer so here.” Leah handed out three boxes before sitting next to you with the fourth one, as your in laws began tearing the paper off Leah grabbed your hand pulling it to her mouth before kissing it softly looking at you with pure adoration. “We have these already Le.” Leah turned looking at her brother rolling her eyes as her mum turned it around before her head shot up to look at you both at the other end of the table “your joking.” Leah shook her head smiling as David looked at his followed by Jacob “oh my god your having a baby.” Leah pulled out the small English jersey with Williamson on the back as your three in laws jumped to their feet and began laughing, crying and shouting simultaneously in happiness “oh god a little Williamson…oh my god it’s going to be a Williamson.” You laughed squeezing Leah’s hand before standing up as Amanda raced around to wrap you in a hug as Leah protested “hey, I’m your daughter.” Amanda swatted her away as she pulled you close “that doesn’t matter Y/n might as well be my second daughter and on top of that she’s carrying my grand baby.” Leah laughed looking at you before turning to hug her dad and brother as everyone swapped hugging each other “when did you find out.” You looked at Leah “about 12-13weeks ago I have morning sickness and we didn’t realise, I ended up attending a horse riding event and came off the horse just after finishing my round as I passed out, when they brought me to the hospital they took my bloods and told me a short while later.” You squeezed Leah’s hand “and your father and brothers do they know.” You nodded “I’m sorry we would have told you sooner but protocol calls for Pa to be told first then the rest of the families and if I’m being honest this was the best way we could tell you.” Amanda shook her head “this was perfect oh girls I’m so proud of you both.”

Speculation about your pregnancy had been on going since way before you where pregnant but now more then ever did the press seem to be so sure of it. You knew a statement would have to be put out sooner rather then later and so the clock was ticking to tell the rest of your friends I.e the Arsenal and England girls.

Arsenal where first after the both of you decided the last match before international break would be best as it allowed the girls to hold the secret for the shortest amount of time. Arsenal had beaten West Ham 3 nil at meadow park so the locker room was ecstatic when you knocked on the door only to be greeted by Wally “Y/n hey she’s in the toilet but come in.” You knew Leah was changing her jersey to the one you had bought her not to long after telling her you where pregnant “hey guys how are you all doing.” The team all turned cheering at the sight of you before talking all at once “ehm right I won’t keep you all to long from your celebrations just have one thing to say really quick.” You looked around the room at the faces of the girls you had so quickly called friends and some even family “eh alright, so there will be a new member to the squad next season, I’m sure they’ll be a great asset my only hope is you love them nearly as much as Leah and I do.” To say the squad was confused was an understatement until you wife came running out of the bathroom before turning shouting “SIUU.” Showing off the back of her Arsenal jersey that read Mummy 6 on the back, the locker room realised rather quickly after that and the team where up screaming not even a second later as they all piled towards you both to wrap you in a group hug “oh my god Baby Arsenal is on the way holy shit best teammate ever, ahhh I can’t wait.” Could all be heard from different directions. The girls decided you all had to go out for dinner to celebrate, you spent the rest of the night laughing and talking about the future member of the squad.

The English squad came a bit earlier then expected, you had planned to wait until the last match to tell them but had been informed that your announcement was due out in less than a week and you wanted the people closest to you to know a bit further in advance so here you where at the first training session of the camp having stayed with Leah the night previously, you walked towards the team holding three jerseys behind you as you made smiled at your wife who had spotted you waving sheepishly before feeling some one scoop you into a hug “Al I swear to god put me down.” The older girl laughed putting you back on the ground as she hugged you tightly “oh what you doing here.” You smiled at her “all will be revealed shortly but for now how are you haven’t seen you in ages.” You and the older girl hit it off the first time you met, although she thought of you as a stuck up snob who was simply entitled like the rest of her family she soon found out you where a lot more down to earth and not at all as close to stuck up or entitled as she thought.

Leah ran over shortly after pulling you into a kiss “ew.” Leah turned flipping off Grace and Aggie. Alex laughed “hey what happened to Royals not showing PDA.” You rolled your eyes “Shut it you, I’m allowed to kiss my wife wherever I please thank you.” The girls laughed as Leah started asking them to line up for a photo “oh boo your here on a royal visit, thought you where here to see your mates like.” You pushed Mary’s shoulder lightly laughing “I’m here to see mates I just wanted a photo with you all like we have done every time I’ve come to visit.” Mary shook her head “You Royals and your bloody traditions.” You laughed shuffling away from her as Leah set up the girls to stand in places she wanted them. Once everyone was set you handed out the three jerseys One to Georgia one to Kiera and one to Alex all readying “Baby Williamson 25” before looking at the camera smiling. The girls didn’t think anything of it thinking your niece and nephews names where on the back like they had been previously, that was until the media crew showed the girls the photo for final approval, the front row consisted of the younger girls Aggie,Grace,Ebony, Khiara, the middle row consisted of Ella,Alessia,Hempo,Chloe,Esme,Niamh,LJ,Ellie, Hannah and Lotte and the back row consisted of Lucy,Millie,Rachel,Georgia,Leah,Y/n,Alex,Kiera,Beth,Mary the younger girls shot up first with Grace running right for you as Leah stepped in front “slower.” Grace let out a sheepish smile as she wrapped you in a hug “congratulations, oh my god your having a baby.” The rest of the team took a bit longer to process the information excluding the Arsenal girls before they did exactly what the girls at Arsenal did and formed a massive group hug before bursting into multiple questions. You spent the rest of the day being followed by 23 England players chatting about the upcoming games as well as about baby who all the girls where so excited to meet.

Finally it was time to tell the public

Her Royal Highness Princess Y/n and Mrs Leah Williamson are pleased to announce they are expecting a baby in the coming summer.

The king has been informed and both families are delighted with the news.

To say the news was met with nothing but well wishes is an understatement you soon found letter being sent wishing congratulations and clothes and toys where handed to you at any possible moment when in public.

6 MONTHS LATER

You had been dismissed from your royal duties a couple of months back and since then Leah had been waiting on you hand and foot, the team where heading into the off season and the England girls where gearing up to defend their title of European Champions and although you knew this pregnancy had been planned in order to ensure Leah would be in England and out of camp for the birth of your baby you couldn’t help but feel nervous that you would go past your due date and that she would miss it.

Leah tried her best to calm your woes but could do little to help the anxiety that seemed so constant. The WSL season has ended two weeks ago and since you both had been wrapped up in Kensington Palace, your father had insisted on it stating that if you went into Labour in Milton Keynes you would never make it to St Mary’s on time where they knew all doctors and nurses had been vetted, and you had to admit it did slip your mind that you where having a royal baby at the end of the day and so these measures had to be taken.

Luckily for you both the apartment was big enough that you could ask Leah’s family to move down for the last remaining weeks as you didn’t want them too far away when it happened knowing she needed them and all though you wouldn’t admit so did you. The Williamson’s time and time again had proven how much they loved you both, how much they loved you and when you felt the world hated you and you felt you couldn’t voice the concerns to your family in fear of them telling you to “never explain never complain.” You went to them and spent many nights sobbing into Amanda’s arms as she held you with the carefulness only a mother could. You needed them there.

It was the early hours of the morning on the 14th of June, just three days before Leah was supposed to leave for camp to start preparing for the euros when you where woken with a contraction, you sighed looking at the clock as it read 1:30 am. Sighing you turned slightly to see Leah dead asleep facing the other way, you knew this baby wasn’t coming for another few hours but you also knew you couldn’t lie in bed any longer and had made the decision to go to the lounge. Getting out of the bed without Leah waking up these days was hard but tonight she was out cold and only stirred as you let out a small groan as another contraction came.

You sighed sitting on the couch looking for something to watch, you gripped the remote tightly as you stopped on the replay of the final of the Euros 2022 at Wembley you had seen it repeatedly at least a thousand times but for some reason you couldn’t flick away. You had made it to half time before you felt someone sit down beside you, turning you spotted Amanda “everything ok darling.” You looked at her smiling “your going to be and Grandma.” Amanda laughed “well yes you told me this nine months ago love.” You shook your head laughing “no I mean your going to be a grandma today.” Amanda looked at you shocked “I’ve been sat here since 2 o’clock after I was woken at 1:30 with my first contraction, it’s happening you grand baby is coming today.” Amanda was shaking her head “what on earth are you doing sitting here, where’s Leah, oh god you have to get to the doctor.” You smiled shaking your head “I’m not ready yet.” Amanda shook her head again “oh I know it feels like that but you are trust me you….” You laughed “no I’m ready to be a mum I know that, my body just isn’t ready yet I can tell, there’s no point waking Le up when she doesn’t need to be and all she will do is just push me to go to the hospital well before I need to be, she needs the rest and I’m not in a hurry, besides this match is just getting good.” Amanda turned to look at the TV for the first time smiling wide as she recognised the kit and the girls and the packed out Wembley “alright if your sure.” You nodded turning back to the TV.

At 6:30 Leah came running through the doors panic written across her face “Y/n.” Leah let out a sigh coming to stand beside you “hey what are you doing in here.” You smiled grabbing her hand “we where just watching some old matches before we headed to the hospital.” Leah nodded along before pausing “hospital.” You smiled nodding “yeah I’ve been getting contractions since 1:30 and they have gotten a lot closer so I’m going to go change and call Buckingham while you get changed and then we are going to head to the hospital to meet our baby.” Leah’s face paled “meet…baby…you have been awake since 1:30 and didn’t wake me, mum why didn’t you wake me.” Amanda looked at you and back to Leah “y/n wanted you to sleep.” You put your hand out for Leah to help pull you off the couch and as you stood you felt another contraction falling into Leah’s chest as you squeezed you eyes shut and puffed out your cheeks in pain “hey hey it’s ok I’m right here, your ok.” You nodded standing up straight as the contraction ended “I’m ok, let’s go get changed yeah.”

Sitting on the bed you watched Leah race around looking for something as you phoned Buckingham and then looked at your watch before calling your Sister in law “hello Kate.” You sighed watching your wife run around like a headless chicken before using the code word you had come up with many months ago so that she would know you where heading to the hospital “I’m just popping to the shops for orange juice.” Kate let out a gasp “if you could let Zara and Will know I’ll give you a call when I have it.” Kate let out a string of excitement shouts before wishing you congratulations and hanging up as you turned to Leah “it’s in the top drawer of your bedside table Le.” Leah shook her head “you don’t even know what I’m looking for…oh it is sorry my love, right let’s go.”

You arrived at the back of St Mary’s at 7:30 am to be met with your team of doctors and nurses who informed you the press had already been set up since the 12th of June in anticipation.

And at 9:30 am you where sat in bed at St Mary’s holding you daughter as you and Leah cried tears of joy over her “she’s perfect, absolutely perfect.” Leah kissed you passionately before you both turned to look back at you daughter “right you top off.” Leah looked at you shocked “dear god woman you have just had a baby keep it in your pants.” You laughed shaking your head “no le it’s time for you to do skin to skin contact with her.” Leah let out an oh as she took her top off before taking your daughter out of your arms and sitting on the chair next to you “I can’t believe she’s here.” You smiled your heart swelling at the sight of them “Your Dad, did he approve of the name.” You rested your head back on the pillow “he did.” Leah turned looking down at your daughter talking softly “ well then welcome to the world Amelia Maria Elizabeth Williamson.”

A short while later your first visitors arrived, the King along with William, Kate and the kids “she’s absolutely beautiful Y/n well done indeed.” You laughed at your father as he looked down at his granddaughter for the first time “thank you Pa.” George, Charlotte and Louis took turns sitting in the chair holding her gently as you watched Leah tell them where to put their arms before placing her down gently, giving extra support to Louis “that’s it mate you got her, she’s heavy isn’t she.” You laughed looking at Kate “Well.” Kate wrapped her arms around you squeezing you tightly “she’s perfect honestly so perfect congratulations to you both I can’t wait for her to join in our little tea talks.” You laughed as William came over “Mum would be so proud, she would adore her honestly.” You looked back over as Leah took Amelia back from Louis “like how she adores them all.”

Next was Leah’s family a lot smaller and less noisy which you where thankful for, you had been holding Amelia lightly chatting to your wife as she watched on when they came through the door and you had handed her off to Leah allowing her to be the one to introduce the most important person in her life to three people she loved the most in the world “Mum,Dad,Jacob this is Amelia.” You felt your eyes well up for the umpteenth time that day as they all cooed over her before Leah asked Amanda if she wanted to hold her to which Amanda nodded quickly “oh hello darling I’m Grandma, and you don’t know it yet but you are so so loved my little darling.” Leah sat on the side of the bed taking your hand “ I love you.” You hummed looking at the people in the room before your eyes landed on your daughter “I’m so glad I fell in love with you back then, that I have fallen even more in love with you since, I loved you first Le and I’ll love you last but mostly I love you for moments like this the little in between. You have given me the life I dreamed about from the moment I met you.” Leah sighed leaning forward capturing your lips “Here’s to everything in between then my love.”

[crowleysgirl56]

A really great update from Vera at Council of Geeks. Really excellent points about each of the productions currently attached to NG. I very much agree with all her thoughts around the Good Omens finale, and glad she is able to voice those opinions so well and clearly.

One thing I hadn’t known was Douglas McKinnon was also co-show runner of Anansi Boys and quit around the same time as quitting Good Omens.

That’s incredibly telling. Obviously we still don’t know the reasons, but NG had only specifically addressed McKinnon leaving Good Omens stating it was due to production clashes as a result of the writers strike (at least that’s what I remember seeing him post, after answering an ask that he had received here on Tumblr). I don’t ever recall him saying anything about McKinnon leaving Anansi Boys. I know we could speculate the reasons, and they probably wouldn’t be helpful. But I’m really curious to know if it had anything to do with McKinnon having foreknowledge of the allegations.

I’m also pretty sure that NG had hinted here earlier this year that Anansi Boys would be out really soon, so my assumption is Prime was ready to make a release date announcement, the allegations came out, and they’ve delayed announcing or releasing it until they feel it appropriate to continue. You know, bullshit things that giant corporations like to do, making it seem like they’re taking a stand but really just concerned about their own self interests and bottom line.

Lastly, touching on Sandman S2, I’ve been really torn about whether I’ll watch that one or not. If I did end up watching it, I’ll do it outside the golden binge watching week that Netflix so very much likes to take all their renewal decisions from. Though I will be incredibly pissed off if they decide to renew for a third season, considering their decision to cancel other incredibly great shows after only one season, and with cliffhangers. But at the same time I once again feel sorry for the hundreds of other people who worked hard on it who now lose work because of the actions of one shithead person.

I’ve been really sad and angry this last week, and this is just yet another reminder of how one person who was supposed to be one of us, let us down by being a complete monster. I’m still so angry that he tore away such a safe space for so many people and tainted so many other beloved works because of his actions.