#I’m thinking Mop Bucket but pending

[big-spork]

Hmmm ponysona ..

[siempre-pedro]

Say No To This

Mob!Ben Hardy x Reader SMUT 

Summary: Ben has been relentlessly trying to get you to sleep with him, and you say no every time knowing what you know about him. But how could you say know when his lips are dangerously close to yours and his hands roaming your body when he meets you after hours. 

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: SMUT 18+ 

A/N: I’m so happy to be back from vacation in NYC! I got the opportunity to see Hamilton so this is hella loosely based on Say No To This. The title and the vibe of the song fit here. Please let me know what you think!! 

Y/N Y/L/N stood by the front automatic sliding doors at the entrance of the library, ushering the last few reluctant elderly patrons out the door. She forced a smile as they finally made their way out the door talking amongst themselves about the books they rented. Y/N takes her shiny golden key from the ring of her purple jelly bracelet and swiftly locked the doors “Any plans tonight Sid?” she asks as the janitor Sid walks out of the closet with his bright yellow mop bucket.

The white-haired man leans against the thin mop and shrugs “Margie is on a vegan binge, I’ll be eating the with the blokes tonight,” he chuckles making the young librarian laugh. She shakes her head and folds her hands against her lap, cocking her head.

“A salad isn’t bad Sid,” she sang, “I need to reorganize the history section before I leave. Have a good night,” she chuckles motioning towards the stairs.

“Have a good night, Ms. Y/N,” he sends her off with a smile, taking his mop out of the bucket of water. She nods and descends the long winding staircase, her heels clacking against the stone ground. A fully stocked metal cart awaited her at the glass doors of the room. As she wheels it through the long shelves the Y/H/C woman grimaces at the state of the once neatly lined books. But it was something she was used to in her many years of working here, her father was once the director of the large library in London…once.

She picks up a tattered biography and examined the worn edges of the dull green cover, something in the brown pages catches her eye. A colorful piece of paper emerging from the center pages, she quickly opens the book to see the 50-pound note. A fake note. Her breathing shallows as she takes the fake bill and wads it up to put it in the pocket of her black skirt. Paranoia makes her flip through the books; more notes fall out. She thought the cops got them all. She places the book on the shelf and turns her attention to the cart, picking up each book and shaking it.

How much more fucking money was in her library? Her thoughts run wild as the pile of fake money builds in front of her. In her panicked search for the counterfeit money, she begins to hear footsteps on the cold floor entering the space. They weren’t like the normal footsteps of someone staying after hours frantically trying to get out or even normal, calm steps. These certain pair were slow, one foot after the other taking their time to get to their target. The sound alone exuded confidence, a chill stops her in her tracks, closing the books. She knew those steps all too well.

She’d met the man who belonged to those methodical steps months ago when she arrived at her father’s house for a typical Thursday night dinner.  Y/N wasn’t met with hot dinner on the table but with her father standing with 5 men in black suits, guns in hand as her father handed over large stacks of cash. “What the hell is going on?” She asks, slamming the door behind her

The leader had turned to face her his pink lips forming a condescending smirk “Well Mr. Y/L/N, who is this?”  Fuck he was pretty. He was tall with swept-back blond hair and freshly shaven undercut, his bright green eyes bore into hers as he scanned her up and down.

“Dad?” she asks hesitantly.

“Y/N it’s ok,” he tries to reassure you, placing the money in a black duffle bag one of the man's goons was holding.

The blond turns on his heel and walks over to you slowly “Did Daddy not tell you he worked for the mob?” he chuckles, standing close so that their chests were almost touching. Her worried eyes look past the handsome man and straight to her embarrassed father.

“The mob? Are you fucking kidding me,” she nearly sobs, angry tears forming in her eyes.

“He takes care of my money…maybe I could take care of you,” Ben smirks as he bites his lower lip.

“Fuck off,” she seethes as she pushes him away, “I-I need to go.”

Even then it wasn’t the first time he’d find her. Ben would show up at random times at work and while she was out. Even offering to buy her coffee when he appeared behind her at the third coffee place she found in the city, the previous two the mobster had already found out about. He was like a disease and she was bound to catch it.

“What do you want, Ben?” She questions without turning around.

Ben chuckles lowly “I came to see my favorite girl.”

Y/N narrows her eyes and turns around, pointing the book she was holding to his face “I am not your girl…the doors are locked…h-ho-where’s Sid?” She panics, pushing past him to get to the door. He grabs her by her arm as she passes him, stopping her in her tracks “He’s fine, Darling,” he sighs, “he’s in a closet. You and I have this whole place to ourselves,” he purrs in her ear. She puts her hand on his chest to push him away. His bright green eyes look down into hers, a smirk adorning his lips.

“Go away. I mean it,” she growls. Ben moves them back making spine hit the edge of her desk, his hands roam her sides, fingertips dipping in underneath the fabric of her top. She threatens him again, trying to nudge him away from her, it’s laughable he thinks of it. He’d worn her down and that blush on her cheeks told him so.

“I don’t think you want me to, Y/N. Tell me what you really want.”

“Well it’s not this,” she hisses. Ben rolls his eyes and brings his lips closer to her ear with his nose lightly brushing against the skin.

“Are you sure? Look at you pressed against me. You know I’m bad for you but I think you like it. You can’t say no to this,” he whispers knowingly, fingers lifting the thin fabric of her shirt. She held back a groan at his darker voice. She couldn’t do it, after her fathers fall from grace and it was all because of his dealing with him, the handsome mobster wanting her. But he was right there hovering above her, his lips leave her ear and find their way to her lips. His warm breath that smelled of dark liquor and cigarettes lingered above her painted frown.

Ben had enough, he presses her lips against his roughly, bringing her body closer to his as close as they could be. She couldn’t say no now, she gave in to the deep feelings that started after he left her father's house that night. Their lips move together effortlessly, lifting herself onto the cold desk she wraps her legs around his waist. The mobster pulls back and before he starts biting at her neck he whispers “I told you so.”  

His hand reaches up her skirt to rip off the thin lace panties that were separating him from her aching core. She gasps at the sudden gust of cold air that hits her, goosebumps rising on her skin. Ben chuckles and rubs his hand up and down hers for warmth “Let’s take this off,” he purrs as he starts to unbutton the black circles on her blouse. As soon as he sees her exposed chest, breasts still confined to a black bra he groans lowly sucking in his lower lip. Ben’s eyes scanned the beauty on the table below him, fuck she was perfect.

“Your turn,” she mutters, reaching behind herself to unclasp her bra.

The mobster obliges and takes off his suit jacket and unbuttons his white shirt, his toned abs on full display “You like what you’re seeing, Princess?” He asks. Y/N nods with her pussy aching for him, she needed to feel him, all of him on her body. Once he finally strips down he tugs off her skirt and throws it over his shoulder with a light thud as it hits the floor with all the other articles of clothing. Ben gets on his knees and hums as he sees what he’s done to her “I knew you were into me, look how wet you are,” he draws out his words as he takes a finger and glides up her sensitive folds only to hold it up and show her the fluids on his finger.

“B-Ben please,” she mewls, bucking into his touch. Taking her trembling legs and pulls them apart farther, he leans in licking a long stripe up her core.

“Fuck!” she shouts.

“Shh Princess, in a library? You should know better,” he provokes again, making her roll her eyes.

“Fuck you,” she sighs, running her hand along his shaved undercut. The grip on his head tightens pulling him towards her again. The blond licks up and down her folds, drawing out letters on her that always stops on her clit. “Ben there!” she gasps. he responds to her moans by gently sucking in the sensitive nub. Her hips buck making him laugh, the vibrations sending shock waves of pleasure “I think I’m going to cum,” she manages to get out. Ben inserts two fingers quickly making her hips buck again, her whines were music to his ears as he finger fucked her. “Ben I’m going to come,” she cries when his fingers find her g spot.

Ben instantly pulls back, her pending orgasm weakening “The only way you’re going to cum is on my cock,” he says as he wipes his lips on the back of his hand. He loves the look of her, in pure pleasure and disarray as she kneads her breasts. “Such a beauty,” he comments.

“Do you want me to?” She questions awkwardly with her eyes looking at his hard cock, the tip glistening with precum. His strong hand begins to stroke the thick shaft and rolls over the sensitive head. Ben shakes his head in disapproval, his face slightly scrunching.

“No, baby girl I just want to be inside you.”

“Hurry, Ben,” she says as she slowly starts to close her legs to tease him. She knew she wouldn’t be able to close them before he would take his hand off his dick and open them back up. She was right of course. Ben opens her legs back open telling her it wasn’t the time to get shy. That’s true. Taking his cock, Ben lines himself up at her entrance.

As he pushes in she grips his flexed biceps due to the slight pain of his cock stretching out her pussy. And when the pain died down she fit wonderfully around him “So fucking tight,” he groans, bringing his head down to her shoulder. His warm breath sends a shiver down her spine, her hips bucking with her body desperate for his touch. Which he was happy to provide with his hand carefully running down her side and her hip. Once he came to her hip he latched on, his thumb digging into the flesh at the same time his thrusts became harder. They were still slow with him pulling out so that the tip was inside her until he slammed his cock inside her making her cry out every time.

“Fuck. Harder Ben,” she orders.

“What’s the magic word, princess?”

“Now or I’ll call the cops!”

Ben only laughs and pulls out “I have the cops in the palm of my hand,” he growls before pulling her hand and guiding her off the desk. Ben turns her around and plants her face against on the shiny desk and uses his legs to spread her legs apart. Scanning her ass he gives it a firm slap leaving a pink mark. She gasps and clenches her fists tightly “Do you want me to fuck you again, Y/N?”

“Y-yes,” she pants. He gives the other cheek the same treatment giving it a matching pink mark. He smirks in admiration of his work, his palms rubbing over the warm marks. The sound of slaps filled the large space, her moans followed soon after pleading for him to stop. But she really didn’t want him to stop.

Suddenly he stops to line himself up at her wanting entrance, “Then be a good girl,” he taunts before entering her. His thrusts are quicker this time around, he’s had his fun but he was ready to cum and he could see that she was too. Her walls clench around him “Clench tighter,” he grunts, throwing his head back.

“Fuck! Sh-ahh. Ben, I need to cum,” she cries reaching down to rub her aching clit. He doesn’t say no or continues to be his demanding self instead he places gentle kisses on her shoulder telling her to cum for him. Y/N lets out the most erotic moan that Ben had ever heard as she came, her legs going weak. That moan alone sends him over the edge. The thought of spilling himself inside her crossed his mind but that would be a mess for another time. Deciding to pull out, long lines of cum paint her ass and a string of curses escape his lips.

He reaches over her desk and grabs a few tissues from the pink tissue box. He wipes away the evidence and tosses the used tissues into the trash. Helping her stand up, he looks down at her tired face “Did you like it?”

Y/N laughs, his question sounded like a someone who just had sex for the first time looking for validation. She turns around and stares at his naked chest “I can cross off almost hate sex with a mobster from the bucket list. I enjoyed myself, yes,” she answers, reaching up to kiss him.

They get dressed in silence, sneaking glances at each other as the clothes go back on. Ben readjusts his tie and watches her put her heels back on with a satisfied smirk. Y/N straightens out her blouse before they walk together towards the glass door, her hands folded over her lap “Are you going to tell?” she asks worriedly.

He turns to her and cocks his head, his pointer finger lifts her jaw to meet his glare “Nobody needs to know,” he tells her. After placing a last longing kiss, he walks towards the staircase “I would like to do this again,” he calls, looking back at her.

Y/N folds her arms over her chest while she leans on the thin glass responding by rolling her eyes “You know where to find me,” she mumbles.

“I’ll see you soon then Ms. Y/L/N…you should probably get the janitor out of the closet. It’s been a while.” She looks up at him while he walks up the stairs then looking back at her desk in the middle of the room. The Y/H/C sighs and puts her hands on her pocket, crumbling the fake bills before returning to her work like nothing ever happened.

[daydream-in-a-dream]

Reverie (NCT Kun)

Genre: Fluff, angst, Soulmate!AU

Word count: 4.2k

Description: Dreams is the only way you and your soulmate can communicate. Despite the beautiful dreams, you couldn’t help but wonder if there is a hidden message behind all that.

He came like the maritime breeze, gentle and refreshing to the touch. The waves were lapping on the shores in a continuous motion, providing the white noise to occupy the comfortable silence between the two of you. When the sun peeked from the horizon, he subconsciously gripped your hand a little firmer, causing you to turn your head and face him as a soft smile made an appearance on his visage.

Gazing at his features was something that you never get tired of doing. From the side, you could see how his chestnut eyes seemed to glow in delight as the sun rose with elegance. His cheekbones became more prominent when his lips curved upwards with his teeth becoming visible. Just when you were about to place your finger on his cheek, it all soon turned black.

A wet towel was thrown on your face with a rude smack. You quickly removed the cloth and rubbed your eyes hastily to find the perpetrator behind the rude awakening. Glaring at your roommate with vehemence, she only laughed at your misery before she packed her essentials found in the shared room.

"You're going to be late for class if you continue to stay on your bed, sweetheart." She waved you goodbye afterwards, leaving you in a groaning mess as you willed yourself to get up from the bed. It was only when you saw the minute hand pointing at the 35-minute mark did you made immediate movements to get ready. Public transport was out of the question as you opted to bike your way instead.

Your knees were burning as you pedalled hard, ringing the bell once in a while to warn the pedestrians of your oncoming bicycle. Some would grumble in annoyance while a few would belt out a string of profanities as you brushed past them, causing you to mutter an apology once in a while. However, it was unlikely that they could hear you based on the speed at which you were travelling.

Once you had reached the school grounds, you didn't bother to check whether you locked your bike securely as you soon sprinted to the lecture venue. By the time you opened those large doors, all eyes were on you which caused you to stand stupefied due to all the attention you were getting. With a stern face on, Mr Lee pushed his thin-rimmed spectacles upwards as he cleared his throat.

"I would appreciate if you get to your seat so that I can start my lesson on time."

Snickers filled in the room as you lowered your head while making your way to the nearest empty seat you could find. It didn't help that you were sitting right where you were in the lecturer's line of sight, and your droopy eyes were enough to tell that you were going to have a hard time trying to pay attention.

Sitting for a 3-hour lecture was no simple task for you, especially when you stayed up late to finish an online assignment which slipped off your mind since a few weeks ago. It didn't help that you started to daydream in class as you played around with your pen, once in a while doodling on your notebook to keep yourself awake. It wasn't long before your head was tangent on the table as you drifted off to dreamland.

You were at the park this time round. Sitting at one of the wooden benches available, you spotted him jogging towards you with ice creams on both of his hands. He then passed one to you before the both of you savoured in the dessert, giving off a cool sensation in this scorching hot weather.

The man beside you decided to be playful when he slightly knocked your hand which was holding the ice cream, causing the cold dessert to make contact with your nose and form a blob on it. He mirthfully laughed at the sight as you whined at his mischievous act. His pure, unadulterated laugh was music to your ears. It was also the first time when you heard his voice, although not in speaking terms yet.

In the end, he took a napkin to wipe it off from your face albeit you were still sulking about it as his eyes crinkled with amusement. To appease you, he left a peck on your cheek but that only led you to click your tongue in annoyance when you felt the creamy sensation on your skin. He was flustered this time round as he soon wiped away, resulting your squinting eyes to relax before you chuckled at his panicked look.

However, just when you were about to reach out your hand to ruffle his hair, your vision was clouded.

'Miss? Miss?!" You stirred awake as the stranger continued to tap your forearm. Rubbing your eyes to adjust yourself to the lighting, you were surprised to see unfamiliar students streaming into the lecture hall. With flushed cheeks, you quickly gathered your items, muttering apologies along the way as you briskly walked towards the exit.

Glancing at your watch, you realised you had been sleeping for two hours straight. Thank goodness your class at 3 p.m. was cancelled because you would have to run like Usain Bolt to get to the other side of the building if you don't wish to be late once again. For now, you wished to lie down on your bed and sleep for the rest of the day.

It was weird that you felt lethargic even though the day hasn't come to an end yet. You blamed it on your online assignment, and maybe those dreams as well. You were aware that those weren't ordinary dreams; they were soulmate dreams — just like how your mother had described it over the phone when you first had them a few weeks ago. Recurrent dreams of your significant other would indicate that it wouldn't be long before you would meet. As much as you anticipated the meeting, you were also nervous. What if those dreams were just a fantasy, something in which you can't achieve in reality?

What if he wasn't happy to see you after all?

~~~

Both of you were at the beach again. It was neither during sunrise nor sunset. To be honest, you couldn't tell when dark clouds filled the atmosphere instead. The squalls were getting stronger, but the man by your side didn't budge despite your attempt to get the both of you to higher ground.

"What are you doing? We have to get away from here!" Pulling his arm, you shouted in anxiety.

"Isn't it beautiful?" His calm voice stopped you from pulling. You were puzzled; there was no doubt about it. You find it a pity that the first words that you heard from him didn’t make sense. He even had the audacity to smile at you before he raised his eyebrows, prompting you to answer his question. How could you possibly speak when you saw the waves quickly receded from the coast, exposing part of the ocean floor?

He then faced back to the sea, watching the waves exponentially grow in height. He still grinned at the sight, his grip on you never once loosen. Even as the enormous wave came approaching towards the shore, you couldn't find yourself to move. Your eyes shifted between him and the waves, and it was only a matter of time before the tsunami wrecked the entire coast. With his eyes closed, he intertwined his hands with yours which caused you to shift your attention entirely on him.

"If I didn't manage to say this in real life, I just want you to know that I love you."

That was the last thing he said before the waters enveloped the both of you.

A splash of water greeted you in the next morning. You immediately shrieked in response as you threw your now wet pillow to your roommate, only for her to dodge it effortlessly and cause the pillow to land on your dressing table, your skincare products left scattering on the ground. You winced at the sound before your roommate decided it was a good time for her to nag at you.

"You better wake up now woman! Don't tell me you're going to sleep all day. I'm tired of your lazy ass."

"But it's Saturday!" You retorted as you reached out for your blanket, only to realise it was drenched as well. There was no way you were going back to sleep when your bed was in such a state. Begrudgingly, you got up as she continued to remind you of the pending chores which you had to do since it was your turn today. To be frank, nothing went into your head as you took your towel before heading to the bathroom even though your roommate hadn't finished her sentence.

"Don't forget to do everything!" She hollered before she slammed the door, probably going out to shop with her friends.

Even though you had the urge to sleep back, you knew your roommate won't give you a break until you had done all that you needed. You willed every ounce of energy within you to finish all your necessary responsibilities — from changing the bedsheets and mopping the floors. You were already sweating buckets by the time you had finished, and you were hoping that you could reward yourself with a good meal, only to realise that there was barely anything in the fridge. You decided to go to the nearest food court and made a mental note to drop by the supermarket later.

You knew it wasn't Valentine’s Day today, but seeing the couples around you made you think so. You didn't know where to look when your eyes were greeted with public display affection in all directions. A frown unknowingly appeared on your face as you had yet to meet your soulmate. You didn't even recall what he looked like. There were times when you complained about that to your mother, but she replied with a chuckle as she explained to you that soulmate dreams functioned differently. 

"You may think that you could remember his features very well in the dream, but once you wake up, not much will be retained in your memory. Same goes for conversations in such dreams. You can only tell that he's your soulmate in real life when you can feel his emotions strongly the moment you made eye contact with him."

You found soulmate dreams complicated, but you still thanked your mother for the information before you hung up the phone previously. Nonetheless, you fed yourself with positive thoughts, convincing yourself that you would meet him very soon as you skipped your way to the food centre.

Just when you were about to step into the shop, you spotted from the corner of your eye an odd sight. In the midst of the bustling city, you saw an elderly woman frantically looking left and right, not minding the people who might have harshly brushed against her due to the peak hours. You carefully approached her so as to not startle her, and you were glad to assist her when she looked at you as if you were her only hope.

"Is there anything that I can help you?" You questioned.

"Hospital. Where is the hospital?"

Your stomach grumbled. Although you were close to starving yourself, you didn't have the heart to reject her when she had asked you so earnestly. Eventually, you offered to accompany her to the hospital so that the guilt wouldn't be gnawing you alive. She thanked you profusely as you quickly hailed a cab before you gently escorted the elderly to the passenger seat once the taxi had arrived. Throughout the journey, the woman beside you couldn't keep her legs still as she continued to glance outside, wondering how long more before both of you arrived at the hospital. You held her hand, hoping the physical action could ease her heart a little, and you cautiously brought up the subject in an attempt to alleviate her worries.

"What happened exactly?"

"My grandson collapsed while he was working. I've already told him not to work anymore when he was diagnosed with a terminal illness but he was stubborn. Oh, why does God have to test him this way?! Why not me?!" She was wailing while her fist kept pounding on her chest, feeling upset that she couldn't do anything for her grandson. She continued to monologue on how God should have taken her instead since her grandson still had a long life ahead. You were left with little choice as you embraced her in a comforting manner while reassuringly caressed her back throughout the ride.

The taxi hadn't even completely brake when the elderly next to you rushed to open the door. You couldn't stop her in time when she had already stridden towards the entrance, rendering you speechless before you paid the fare and followed her closely from behind.

The elderly woman seemed to pick up speed once she knew where her grandson was from the receptionist. You were in the nick of time to support her from behind when she was about to lose her footing as she approached the ward.

"I'm fine, sweetheart." She gently patted your hand which was on her shoulder before she slid the door open, revealing a pale looking young man who weakly turned his head upon noticing his grandma was coming towards him. He flashed her a smile before she started to nag at him.

"I've already told you to quit your job but you never listen! Why don't you stop being stubborn and listen to me? It's for your own good!" Even though you were standing very close to the exit, you couldn't find yourself to leave. Especially if your act of leaving could potentially attract unwanted attention.

"But I don't want to stay in the hospital." He pouted, hoping it would stop his grandmother from nagging him any further. She did stop though after she gave a quick slap on his forearm while she grumbled lowly.

Even when he looked so weak, his bright smile could have him mistaken as someone who had recovered from his illness. Yet, when his sorrowful eyes met yours, you suddenly felt an immense pain within you, and it made you realise that he was just holding in his pain just to reassure his grandmother that he was fine. For whatever reason, you couldn't resist the urge to cry so you left, not minding the curious stares from both him and his grandma.

You didn't know why you felt this way when he was practically a stranger, but you did wipe the tears which managed to escape. Your stomach rumbled once again which spurred you to find the nearest vending machine to find some snacks to satiate your hunger. You actually could leave now that you were outside, but somehow you didn't have the heart to step out of the hospital. Just then, the elderly woman sat beside you as you munched your food.

"Can you do me a favour?" You stopped chewing before you shifted your attention to her and nodded in response.

"Can you accompany Kun once in a while? He's already upset that I didn't allow him to be discharged yet." She chuckled to herself while you were trying to figure out who was she referring to, only to realise that it was her grandson who was still lying down on the hospital bed. Your benevolent nature made it hard for you to say no. And once again, you nodded.

It wouldn't be that bad, right?

~~~

With a fruit basket in your hand, you hesitantly reached out for the doorknob before you retracted your empty hand back. A few nurses who walked past you did give a once-over on you before they continued to walk away. Taking a deep breath, you immediately opened the door, not allowing your uncertainties to overtake your body as your eyes landed on Kun. He had been reading a novel all this while before his eyes diverted to you.

"Why are you still standing there? Come sit here." He patted on the chair beside the bed before he earmarked the page and placed the book on his lap. Awkwardly, you put the basket on the tabletop before sitting with your legs clamped together while your palms were placed rigidly on your thighs.

"Chill. There's nothing to be nervous about." Chuckling to himself, you find yourself releasing the tension within you as you watched his relaxed composure.

"I don't know. Honestly, I'm a bit hesitant to come here but I've already made a promise to your grandma." You sheepishly smiled.

"She really has a way with words, huh? But I don't bite; if that's what you're concerned about."

The conversation seemed to flow easily afterwards as both of you laughed in between conversations, with his grandmother as the main topic of discussion. It was fun to listen about his life with his only relative, and it didn't occur to you that it was already dusk if Kun didn't mention it.

"You should go home now. It's not safe to be out so late," he said. "You can come back next time. I really enjoy your company."

That was the start of a new friendship.

~~~

You heard gunshots, followed by petrified screams as the park users were running helter-skelter in order to escape from the scene. The ice cream which you held was instantly dropped to the ground at the sound of panicked shrieks. You immediately thought of him as he was nowhere in sight. You couldn't even call out for his name when you didn't know about it.

Despite the chaotic scene, you continued to run past the sea of people as you searched for him. You didn't stop running even though your knees were burning because you had a feeling that you would lose him forever if you failed to find him. Of course, it was impossible to run forever when your legs finally retreated to the ground. You were already on the verge of breaking down when you heard someone called your name.

It was him, standing proudly a few metres away from you. With a smile, he waved at you. Relief washed over you as you quickly stood up and walked towards him. You thought everything was going to be okay.

Too bad a bullet was shot straight on his heart.

"Kun!" You immediately rose from your bed, breaking out in a cold sweat. It has been a few weeks since you last had a soulmate dream and the fact that you clearly remembered the person in the dream had your eyes widened in bewilderment. What's the meaning of this? Is he my soulmate? These were some of the questions which were running in your head as you stared at the empty beige wall in front of you. You were still seeking answers in the comfort of your bed when your phone rang. You glanced at the screen only to notice Kun's grandmother appearing as the caller ID. Weird, she never called you ever since you received her number during the first meeting.

"Hello?" You hesitantly answered.

In between sobs, she managed to urge you to come to the hospital immediately even though she didn't actually specify why. The rush in her voice was enough for you to dress within five minutes as you booked a taxi in the midst of it.

There was no denying that you were anxious about what was bound to happen in the hospital as you tried to wipe away the sweats forming in between your fingers while the traffic congestion did nothing to alleviate your worries. In fact, the congestion worsened it instead.

When you had reached outside Kun's ward, you spotted the elderly woman weeping on the dull blue seat alone. When she noticed your presence as you sat beside her, she immediately wrapped her frail arms around your petite body as sobs continued to echo the hollow corridor. Despite being confused, you soothed the crying lady as you provided her with the warmth that she sought after.

When she had finally calmed down, she pulled away from the embrace before wiping the tears on her cheeks with the back of her hand. She then opened her mouth before she closed it again, having a hard time to talk about it. You stared expectantly on her while caressing her hand, hoping to calm her nerves. Gulping the lump of saliva which stuck on her throat for some time, she sniffled before facing you with determined eyes.

"He's dying." That was all she said before she burst into tears again, not ready to accept reality. Finally, it made sense to you why she had been crying. Watching her in tears again triggered you to do the same, although you were partially unsure as to why you shut your eyes in anguish as you let the tears streamed down your cheeks.

Your friendship with Kun was blooming, so why did God decided to pull that blessing away from you?

~~~

When Kun's grandmother called you again during your break, you were initially nervous to pick it up because you knew she wouldn't call you unless it was important. Eventually, you braced for yourself, even though your break was coming to an end soon and you had to return back to work.

When she relayed the news to you, you sprinted out from the store with your phone and purse, not minding the shouts from your colleagues. You wildly flailed your arm, hoping to catch the attention of taxi drivers. However, most of them were hired already, leaving you groaning in exasperation. You resorted to sprinting to the hospital despite situated a few miles away from where you originally were, but that didn't deter you from reaching your destination in half an hour. You were also unperturbed by the sweat accumulating in your uniform as you dashed towards his ward, dodging the stream of people every now and then before finally recognising his grandma from a distance.

When you stood in front of her, she had a blank look on her face which caused you to be reluctant in asking the question. Nonetheless, when she looked up, you knew you had to ask her and confirm it once again.

"Is it true... that he died?" She nodded after a pregnant pause. Curiosity got into you when you noticed her hand, which was holding a letter and a bracelet, was raised as she intended to pass those items to you.

"He wanted me to give this to you." When she had handed you the items, the doctor called her to settle Kun's burial matters before you were left alone in the hallway. You fidgeted with the bracelet for a moment, admiring the starry beads which decorated the band and the heart-shaped lock which connected the loop together. You wore it around your wrist before you opened the letter to read the contents.

Hey there... uhmm this is awkward. I don't know how you'll react to this letter but I know I need to write it. There are so many things that I want to share, even though we met quite often previously. But there's one thing that I really wish to talk about, in which I don't have the courage to bring this up. I guess this letter is the only chance I have then, so here goes...

I knew you're my soulmate the moment our eyes met, but I didn't mention about it when I saw you showing no signs of recognition. And that's okay. I prefer our relationship to foster slowly, and that I don't think I'm ready to let you go when the time comes if I were to fall for you so deep. Plus, I don't think it's unfair to let you harbour feelings for me when I knew I wouldn't stay long in this world. I'm sorry I didn't tell you this earlier but I hope that you know how much I treasure you as a person throughout the precious times we've spent together.

May we meet again in the future, in another lifetime, so that I can shower you with all the love that you deserve.

You couldn't contain your tears after you had finished reading the whole thing. He was so considerate of your feelings and you felt it was unjust for a selfless person like him to die so early. Upon realising that a drop had come into contact with the ink on the letter, you quickly wiped away the tears before folding the paper and tucking it in your pocket on your jeans. Walking out of the hospital with a smile, you knew Kun would be more than glad to see you happy.

Reveries of him didn't stop even after his demise, as if you and Kun had never been apart in the first place. Just like how soulmates belonged to each other no matter what.

[fixerupperchic]

I’ve moved in to the cottage!

…and here I sit, among the barrage of boxes…

Seriously, this hasn’t been the smoothest move of my life, but that’s usually the case when DOWNSIZING is involved!  I DO like “my stuff”……

(interesting side note….it’s not unusual for clients to come to me, planning to downsize….but I’d estimate that 90% of the time, they reject EVERY house we see that would fulfill those wishes….people (including yours truly) do NOT like to go backwards in most things in life, including square footage, storage & stuff!)

So, for the last 3 weeks our wonderful crew has been in a race to the finish, pending my moving day!    They all worked so hard to get the messiest, ickiest, and stinkiest jobs handled before I had to spend the night here……and by stinkiest, I mean the oil-based paint we had to use on all the woodwork!

By way of explanation for those not ‘in the know’, the world of paint finishes is now blessed to have perfectly good  water-based (latex or acrylic) finishes for wood; however, if one is painting OVER existing woodwork that was originally painted with oil-based paint, one must use oil-based paint again.  (and many of us old-timers swear it’s a superior finish anyway)  WHAT IF YOU DON’T??  Well, I can speak from first-house experience on that subject:  back in the 80’s my young and energetic self painstakingly painted the kitchen cabinets in our first home a lovely white; since I had little children, I was concerned about the fumes (off-gassing) from oil -based paint, so I used the new latex enamel!  Oh, I was so  proud of myself….until the paint started peeling off in sheets a few months later.

So here’s the rule:  you can paint over water-based paint with oil-based paint, but NEVER the reverse!  You might say that ” oil trumps water” when it comes to paint.   

OK, one more woodwork detail, then I’ll show you some pictures….I’m aware that’s why you’re still here!  When we started this  fixer upper. my wonderful carpenter/builder extraordinaire, Jose Chavarrio,  quietly made the decision to  save and reuse all of the original workwork, to the extent that was possible.  Since we were doing such extensive work, that meant he had to REMOVE most of the base and  facings (the crown had been sprayed along with the ceiling when some earlier remodeler decided that popcorn ceilings would be nice !)  So he removed and stored  trim….and later removed all the old nails in the trim.  And when the day came to finally trim out the newly-remodeled rooms, he re-installled the old woodwork in all the main rooms, leaving new woodwork for the entirely new master bedroom only.   What a heroic effort that was…..and the payoff is that most of my little cottage has original woodwork, recoated with fresh oil-based paint!    (OK, just ONE MORE detail; for those inquiring minds in the crowd, we DID NOT remove the previously-popcorned crown mouldings….we simply installed a larger crown over them!)

So…disclaimers first!  None of the pictures you’re about to see are true “after” pics!  I am still solidly stuck in the unpacking phase.  But little by little, the beauty of this cottage is being revealed, and I know many of you are eager to SEE!  So that’s why I’m calling these “Sneak Peeks!”  Just know you’ll see more completely finished-out rooms soon!

Many of you saw this on Facebook….it was night, I was  too tired to unpack another box….and I just couldn’t resist!  Behind those counter stools is a MOUNTAIN of UHaul and Home Depot boxes!

As a reminder, the chandelier was originally in the living room

What’s missing?  The swinging old-door-from-Canton (had to move in the  washer/dryer first)

I had just  FINALLY removed the  plastic covering from the quartz countertops for the first time minutes before…this lovely 7′ island had been a handy horizontal surface for tools, caulk, sandpaper, stray mouldings, etc….for weeks!

The flowers?  YES, I DID move on my 60th birthday!  Thanks, my friend!

And just a quick reminder of where this view started…

          Here’s a current view of the hall bath…

And a reminder of what we started with…

I’m loving my new home office!  And look!  I haven’t even had time to mess up the desk yet!

(Something tells me Ballard Designs didn’t have a dog bed in mind for that particular cabinet, but Kobe claimed it long ago; he keeps watch while I work!)

  A few scenes from the new Master Bath….

     And once again, a reminder from whence it came:

The window was removed; the walk-in shower is now in that corner

The door was moved to the left a few feet; the tub-to-die-for now sits there

Everything….EVERYTHING else about this room….changed!

Now I want to share a detail that is hard to illustrate (due to the difficulty of photographing a light fixture while it’s ON!)

This hall light fixture is original to the house; we changed nothing about it, unless you want to count using LED bulbs so I never ever have to bother changing them:

When you look down the hall from the living room towards the master bedroom….

….you see a consistency of light…but it’s not until you enter the master bath that you see why…..I LOVE this new fixture mirroring the old!

OK, so…about that old blue door I love so so much….first, would you even believe me if I told you that I bought the interior paint WEEKS before I finally found “the door” to use between the master bath and bedroom?!  It’s true!  (I can hardly wait to show you the bedroom side of this door, and another synchronicity of design that was totally unplanned!)

So, here is the door in the form it came to us:

I would be embarrassed to say how much I pored and pondered over what to actually DO to clean and preserve this, as well as the 2 other old doors I bought for the house.  My goal was to clean off the dirt, but preserve as much as possible of  the peely-paint, patina, and patchiness of the old doors.  After all, if I destroyed the character, what would be the point of using them in the first place?  But most treatments would, indeed, destroy what I loved about these re-purposed beauties.  Entirely true to my personality, I came up with the solution literally the night before the day I HAD to do something to the doors.   (if any of my old teachers were reading this, they’d be seriously rolling their eyes right now; I have ALWAYS tackled important projects just prior to the deadline! )

Harsh detergents would wash off the paint; a wire brush or sandpaper would remove the crazing and certainly any about-to-peel patches; sandpaper would leave fine particles in the ridges created by old joints and slight peels; any ‘clear coat’ would yellow or buckle, and shine too much (even if matte finish).

 So here are the 3 doors AFTER treatment (wish I’d thought to photograph the reverse sides too!)  And here is what I did:

I brushed down each door, both sides, with a lint-free soft mop-like hand brush (think feather duster with fat dust-resistant soft fabric loops)  That removed loose dust.

Then I gently washed each with a soft sponge and a solution of mild dish detergent in a bucket of water.  I was super-pleased with how much dirt I was able to remove without harming the finishes!)

Next I used a soft white cloth to rub in a mixture of orange oil and beeswax; it was painstaking work, as I had to be sure every inch of each door was “nourished” with the mixture.  The oil soaked into the dry, thirsty wood, then the soft beeswax sealed in the moisture.  The difference was subtle, but certainly noticeable!  There is a natural sheen now that the wood is nourished.

Now, the door in the middle is a little different.  There is obviously much more peeling paint on this one; given the age, it is likely to be lead-based paint chipping off.  I don’t have little ones toddling around, eager to eat cute little paint chips….but nonetheless I don’t want that door regularly ‘raining chips’.  I removed all that were loose, but since this will be the sliding door on my pantry, it’s going to be moved daily.  I am therefore going to spray a coat of clear matte sealer on this door.  I was so opposed to this, but having faced the fact that more chips are inevitable, I have decided it’s the best coarse of action.  To remind you, Jose is going to slice this door vertically, and hang ‘barn door’ style as pantry doors.  That should happen this week, and I’ll spray the finish afterwards.  

That brings me to the status of the project, which you may be wondering about:  we are all weary of the work and in need of a break in the action!  And now that I live here, I’m not crazy about having guys show up in the morning and throughout the day to “fix” something.  So all but Jose are off to other projects for now; he is staying with me this week to finish up details on the inside, such as hanging the barn doors, hanging curtain rods, installing new door hardware & keying the locks alike, finishing up the shelves for the living room built-ins, and building the 2′ “box” for the base of the black bathroom cabinet.  There are many little  details he and I will handle this week…..then Jose, too, will move on to other projects for awhile.

It is now too cool and damp to paint the exterior brick and siding; this is so disappointing, as I’m eager to have it sporting it’s new white finish!  But we really need a consistent week of warm, dry weather, and it’s just not predictably going to happen for awhile.  So, we will regroup and attack the exterior of the house in February or March, including landscaping.  The new garage door should be arriving any time now, so we’ll get that done, but otherwise we’re all ready for a renovation rest!

I’ll be back with more blog posts, though, as the interior gets photo-ready!  There are so many details, how-to’s and hints I’d like to share with you, so keep watching for posts!  In the meantime, please leave comments letting me know what type of posts/info/pictures you enjoy the most:  I aim to please!  

Now, as we all turn our thoughts to family, friends, food & fellowship, I want to thank each of you for sharing in my fixer upper journey; many of you have touched my life in ways you do not know….I wish for you all the happiness you can stand in the coming holidays & afterwards into 2018! 

    please don’t forget to leave me your comments below…and remember…….I’m never too busy to help your real estate referrals; I will treat each with the highest level of service!

Sneak Peeks Week! I've moved in to the cottage! ...and here I sit, among the barrage of boxes... Seriously, this hasn't been the smoothest move of my life, but that's usually the case when…