#I’m not actually griping here but I AM pursuing an agenda. you understand

[revvethasmythh]

can't believe this is a real line that gale says and yet gale/durge is somehow surprisingly slept on

[delicatefury]

October 15th - Random thoughts from another temporary LCS

Same town different coffee shop. I like the food here more, but the coffee at the other place is definitely better (even if they make their own syrups here). So this is the breakfast place™, and that’s the writing place™. Atmosphere-wise, they’re different but I like both.

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This week I turn 30. My BFF (the one I actually live near. The other’s still in Hawaii) wants to go out to celebrate. I wonder if I can get her to go to the vintage wine bar... We’re easing back into an... active? Friendship. Not that we’re not still super close. But when you only see each other a few times a year, conversations tend to default to “what’s happened since I saw you last?” Events, y’know? So now we’re kinda easing back into the stupid wonderful friendship of seeing each other at least twice a month if not more. So now we actually have room to talk about stupid important shit like dreams ambitions current events griping about life family pets lack of love life philosophy fandom do you still want to read my novel you can crash on my couch if you need a night or two away look at my stupid cat you have to tell me when you get a puppy i want to spoil it so much.

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This week TDPL turns 2. I’m at 5 chapters. Still. I know. I think I’ve maybe updated once this entire year. My goal had been a chapter a month. Then 4 chapters a year. Then an average of 3. I’m not even gonna try to give a timeline at this point. I think maybe when my days are busier, I might have an easier time writing.

Currently, I haven’t gotten much writing done due to “guilt from not having a job”. Which is easing now that the job search is starting to bear fruit. Makes me feel creative. Now if only i had a place to work at home...

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My interview is Friday. I need to go buy a new suit (I lost weight in the five years since I bought my first interview suit and it is obviously bad-fitting now. Pencil skirts aren’t meant to sit on the hips), new heels (mine are at least 8 years old), and practice my interview questions. My aunt has been amazing for that so far. She hires people for her company all the time, so she knows what’s up.

I’m struggling on the “five years” question. Y’know, “where do you see yourself in 5 years?” I... am not an ambitious person. And I feel like it’s a question to make sure you’re “driven”. I’m not driven in that I’m not motivated by my own status and success. I’m motivated on getting the... well, on getting the issue solved. I want to rise exactly as high as I need to be to most effectively get problems fixed and the work done. I’m not gunning for Partner (though that would be nice) or VP or Lead on a case. I want to be able to put my skills to use. And if doing so means I take those positions, than that’s where I want to be. How do I explain that in a way that impresses hiring partners?

Personal ambitions? I want a quiet, simple, fulfilled life. I want to be useful. But I also kinda sorta want to own a yarn store? Or coffee shop? Or book store? A place that I can make cozy and indulge in my great loves and help other people discover those simple wonderful things?

I want to finish writing and publish a book.

But I’m good at being a lawyer. Crazy good. Lawfully good. And I like the challenge too. So it’s not like I don’t want to be a lawyer in 5 years. It’s just... I have a kinda see where life takes me approach sometimes.

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NaNoWriMo starts in a little over 2 weeks. No clue what I want to write about. No clue if I’ll have no time to participate or too much time.

I think... I think if I can brainstorm enough and research enough, I might cheat a little and do a rewrite of my one finished novel. Because the first draft is terrible and focuses almost entirely on a romance that is central but a subplot at best. Which means I got lost somewhere and need to buckle down and rediscover the actual story I want to tell and whether that needs to be one book or two or three.

Ugh. I love my BFF who lives here, but the BFF in Hawaii is the one who’s always been involved with my writing endeavors. And it’s just not the same discussing said things over phone and/or skype as it is talking it out in person. Oh well. I’ll figure something out.

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The attempts to be social have not born fruit. Mainly because there’s nothing going on right now in the alumni association or the the bar association, though the local NaNoWriMo chapter is ramping up. Problem? It’s in the city, and right now the city is a 45 minute drive for me. If I get a job soon, it won’t be so bad because 1) my job will be in the city and I don’t mind a 45 minute commute for work, and 2) I’ll just do things after work. But right now it’s a pain to drive that far on my own for just a 1-2 hour thing.

But I did get drinks with the BFF this weekend. Next weekend, though, I’m babysitting my nieces and nephew so literally everyone else in my family can go to an event. Because I got lost in the shuffle of coordinating said event and my older sister assumed that one of us younger siblings would be available and didn’t bother finding a babysitter.

Love her, but really? Anyway, since I wasn’t even aware that there were plans for this weekend to begin with (mom swore she told me, but then younger sis reminded her that was our brother they talked to), I decided to just take one for the team. Eh, who wants to risk awkward conversations with people from high school anyway? I think I’ll wait until I’m employed again and not just tagging along with my parents at 30.

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Researching local law is fun. Since I’m doing this for my own potential side-business, I at least don’t have to worry about ethical issues of practicing law without a license (a common saying I’ve run into while researching where the line is: You can always file your own paperwork). I have my license for the state next door. I won’t be licensed for this state (where the farm’s located) until sometime next year.

But the farm’s in an unincorporated part of the county (duh. Not many farms within city limits), so I have to go all the way to actual county zoning code to find the answers I need. There’s no convenient website for these questions like there are for municipalities. While anything I do would have to wait until I at least sit for this state’s bar next July (my 3rd license, but whatever. I’m still a baby lawyer so I can’t just skip the stupid test yet) to be distributed, I’m thinking about putting together a little packet to help other farmers and “unincorporated” (read: country) folks in the county out when it comes to expanding their businesses or pursuing a new line of revenue.

Because the county zoning code is 214 pages and written in legalese. That’s not even touching on other state and county business law questions that crop up. Most people out here assume you can do whatever you can on your own land, especially if it’s zoned for agriculture, and especially since most locals aren’t gonna report you for doing what you want on your own property (because they also assume you can do what you want so long as it’s not hurting anyone/running afoul of the EPA). Probably because their parents and grandparents were able to just start businesses with little interference...

But Dad’s got quite a few stories of people gettting blindsided and unknowingly racking up pretty big fines because, as I said above, there aren’t exactly any easy to understand or easy to access resources for the unincorporated areas of the county.

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Dragalia lost is a better game than it has a right to be.

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It’s about 11, and I’m trying to avoid “Yapping Dog Syndrome” (telling someone your plans appears to be negatively correlated to the likelihood of executing said plans), but I think I might still list them here. (Convincing my family that it will help me if I don’t actually tell them what I intend to do for the day is gonna take some work....).

So, on the agenda:

Depending on if my Mom texts me before I leave, I’m gonna go pick up some legal pads on my way home. You don’t realize how much you miss something until you don’t have it anymore, and legal pads are a boon for researching. I love my moleksines but they’re definitely better suited for brainstorming/writing then idea development/research. Frankly? Between the ipad, print-outs, and books, they get in the way.

I’m gonna spend about an hour or two on the municipal code/etsy policies.

I need to update my cover letter and send it to at least 2 places. Including that charity.

I’m gonna work on my nephew’s blanket. He’s 2. There are literally no excuses. Also, I can’t move onto new projects until I finish it. Including the new baby’s blanket, socks, my own winter gear, and a ton of started but left unfinished stuff for the rest of the family.

Cleaning up my room. It’s... untidy. I mean, most of that’s not my fault. The room was general storage for Mom’s massive project of cleaning out the attics (yes. Plural. We use the undereaves of the house for storage. I’m 98% certain there’s nothing in the actual above-the-second-story attic. Also, the attics contain things going back to Dad’s childhood). So there’s boxes and boxes of stuff. Mom and Dad’s winter clothes, wrapping paper, seasonal decorations, enough musical instruments for a blue-grass/jazz fusion band (sax, trombone, trumpet, banjo, electric guitar, electric bass, drums, keyboard, acoustic guitar x2...), and toys from our childhood that Mom and my big sis want easy access to for the nieces and nephew. Who do indeed love said old toys (though the nephew’s favorites are actually Dad’s old die-cast tractors. Dad has mixed feelings about letting a 2 year old play with what are technically antiques.)

She’s gone through a lot of it. Like, I’ve got room for my bed, dresser, a mini living room for our gaming consoles (I told you it’s a big room. It takes up about half of the upstairs. I shared it with both sisters growing up. We each had our own mini-room in a corner and a shared area by the walk-in closet) and space for the cats’ stuff, but half the room is still packed with junk and the occasional box crosses over into my living space.

Anyway, Mom should have an answer for me for the legal pads soon, so I’ll be heading out.

I might have something for TDPL’s 2 year anniversary on Thursday, but don’t hold me to it.