#I’m gonna go dry for awhile. it’s such a coping mechanism but at the same time it just makes everything so much worse

[urgeforgoing]

I have not been a very good person lately and that really sucks. gonna try to be better starting now lol

[artificialqueens]

The Parent Trap, Chapter 9 (Biadore) - Henny

A/N: Thank you for the comments, Hennies! Y’all are making me feel like Ariel in the beginning of Little Mermaid 2 :> I missed all of you too! Sorry if there was a problem with the formatting of the previous chapter; completely my fault!

OH, and if you’re confused with the timeline, I’ll simplify it for you:

RPDR Season 6 (filming) ended around Mid-July of 2013 (assuming it takes about a year or so before it is released). January 2014; Roy and Danny started dating. 6 months after that, June 2014, a month after Bianca wins, they get married. A year later, the couple gets baby fever, so they start looking for the perfect surrogate and egg donor. This is where I deflect a bit from the prologue, it takes them until May 2016 to conceive.

TLDR; the fic takes place July 2026, and RPDR is currently airing S19 with THE AS:BoTW filming the very same year . If I had said anything contrary to those stated above, disregard it. This is the new timeline I’m going to follow going forward.

All the love, Hennies!

XOXO, Henny

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

“Well, would you be interested in joining the first All-Stars: Battle of the Winners in place of Bianca?”

The way Adore gaped at her phone was almost comedic, mouth opening and closing like a fish. In some way, she’s almost flattered at the fact that Ru called personally instead of a producer. It’s almost very considerate, since the man knew what had gone between Danny and Roy.

“Well, last time I checked, you didn’t crown me, Mama…” Adore adds a teasing tone to her voice, and tries to ignore the nerves that seemed to resurface at the idea of returning back to the competition. It’s been many years since Season 6, and Adore has genuinely forgotten how it feels to be on a platform like that again. Focusing on her music as both Adore and Danny has shifted the focus of her career as a drag queen and performer; and with many seasons passed, she knew her charm has run dry with Drag Race fans.

Ru laughs, the iconic shrill making Adore spiral back into the werkroom. “I didn’t, didn’t I?” He laughs again, and Adore can only imagine him wiping a fake tear. “But, I am planning to release the footage of you and Bianca winning to prove that my decision to invite you has some bearing, at the least.”

Adore inwardly groans again, remembering the night of the finale wherein they filmed the ending of her and Bianca winning together. She feels the ghost of Bianca’s hands squeezing her own as they waved and the sparkly confetti rains and glitters of lights from cameras blinded their eyes; applause and cheers roaring in their ears.

“What will the other queens say? The winners, I mean. It’s not like they’ll consider me a winner, especially the newer queens.” Ever the anxious person that she is, she finds a brush to fiddle with to lessen her anxiety.

“My competition, my rules. Whatever I say goes, Baby. They can say whatever they want, but if they’re smart enough, they’ll pipe up. And, besides…” Ru trails off excitedly, like they were sharing a secret. “Since this is only a Netflix special, I’m only doing the first decade season winners. I’m sure they’ll be nicer to you than recent ones.“

“All of them said yes?”

“All, but one, you already know…”

“Yeah, yeah…”

“So, what do you say?”

“I- I don’t know, Ru. I’ll think about it…”

“Of course, let the producers know soon, alright? Filming starts October! Toodles!”

The call ends, and it takes everything in Adore’s willpower not to throw it to the wall. She looks at her phone’s lock screen and sees the beaming face of Portia, and she manages to calm down. She stands up, grabs a pre-rolled joint in her makeup kit, and heads out of the building after shouting to the manager to inform him about her whereabouts. She normally didn’t do this anymore; smoking, hard liquor, and even hooking up with trades that come her way. Portia had completely turned her life around, and so did Roy and Nerissa. “Fuck,” Tears fill her eyes again at the thought of her daughter who she no longer knew, she sniffles as she takes a long drag of her joint and breathing out harshly.

A tall figure looms over her, and with a tap on her shoulder, she nearly doubled over in fear. “What the fuckkk…” She groans, clutching her heart.

“Oh, sorry… Didn’t mean to scare you.” Adore looks up to meet the steel eyes of a blonde stud with a smug smile on his face.

“Shit, I know you…” Adore murmurs in thought, before she remembers “You’re Brooke, right?”

“Brooke Lynn Hytes, yeah.” He flashes her a beautiful, gorgeous smile, pearly whites and all. “…But right now, uhh,” He looks down to his jeans and plain gray shirt, “You can call me, Brock.”

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

“Okay, give me another one.” Portia looks at her cards, one five of hearts and the other six of spades. It was really late and they just finished washing the dishes of the entire camp after dinner. Not tired from their post-cry-emotional nap earlier, they had decided to play a game of Blackjack. Nerissa deals her another card, and picks one for herself. Portia peaks at the new card, and sees her nine of spades. She joins the cards together, and places them down in triumph.

“20, let’s see yours, Haylock.”

Nerissa drops her cards, a jack of diamonds, two of clubs, and nine of clubs. “Blackjack, bitchh…” She taunts, laughing at Portia’s dismayed face.

“That’s not fucking fair…” Portia drawls, “That’s your 9th time winning, I think you’re cheating…”

“Oh, please. You just play your cards wrong, and sometimes, I’m just really lucky…” Nerissa beams as she watches Portia fix the cards and put it back in their case, murmuring “I don’t want to play anymore.”

“It’s getting pretty late, too. I think we should go to bed.” Nerissa yawns as she grabs her blanket and tries to settle herself in. Portia agrees before standing up to lock their door; to make sure the windows are tightly shut; and to turn off the light. The moon shines at its brightest, a cool silver light shimmers through their window.

“I know it’s late, but I’m not even remotely sleepy.” Portia comments despite the yawn the escapes her.

“Same here,” Nerissa says with droopy eyes.

“Tell me, what’s Bianca like? No… noo…What’s dad like?” Portia asks, adjusting herself so she faces her sister. The mere idea of having a sister and having Roy Haylock AKA Bianca Del Rio, THE Bianca Del Rio is possibly 50% her dad makes her more giddy than anything in the world.

“Dad is probably the most workaholic person you’ll ever meet. He’ll make time for you, yes. But, you can tell that 75% of his mind is just…” Nerissa sighs, “exhausted, if not thinking about work… He really tries though, he hasn’t missed any of my ballet recitals yet nor any PTAs. He’s as active as a busy parent can be.”

“That’s good, I guess…” A hum of agreement, another yawn.

“And not to mention, the free dresses.” She giggles, “How ‘bout our other dad?” Nerissa turns to lie on her back, thinking about her dad who she hasn’t updated in awhile, even though she promised to do so everyday. A sudden urge to hug her dad courses through her body, and subtle pout forms at her lips at the thought of Roy. She missed her dad, she’s still upset about the whole not-telling-her-she-was-a-twin-thing, but she missed him nonetheless.

“He’s pretty chill. I can do anything I want,”

“Wow.”

“Yeah, my dad’s pretty cool. We have the kind of relationship where I can tell him things and… he can tell me things. He’s my best friend, so we just have fun most of the time.” Portia says with mere awe. “But, it wasn’t always like that. There was a time though where he was pretty down in the dumps; he didn’t really have the best mental health back then and his coping mechanism–”

“Hey, this seems kinda personal. You don’t have to tell me this, okay? Only if you’re comfortable doing so.” Nerissa says, her arm crossing its way to pat Portia’s tummy to stop her thought.

“No, no… You’re my sister, and I trust you enough.”

“Okay, if you’re sure… So you were saying?

“Yeah, so, he didn’t have the best coping mechanism. Alcohol is tricky when it gets out of hand. I didn’t mind at first, because I didn’t think it was that bad. I didn’t notice the signs because I was so young. It was only one incident, really, when I understood the gravity of it all. Around June, he nearly drank himself to death. I don’t know why he drank severely that night, but I just found him passed out on his own–” Portia chokes as tears start up with the memory of seeing her dad then. “I was only four then, Riz. I didn’t know what death was, but the minute I saw him– It just rationalized so quickly in my head. I called 911 as fast as I could. I didn’t know what I was saying half the time ‘cuz I was just crying.”

Nerissa places a comforting hand on Portia’s arm as the girl tries to fight the sniffles. When Portia manages to barely win against the tears, she continues, “When we were in the hospital, I was with my Grandma and there was another man, I– I don’t know who, from what I can remember– we didn’t know if my dad was gonna make it.”

“I’m sorry to hear that, Porsche.”

“No, no… It’s fine. Just sucks to remember it. But, he managed to pull through, obviously. He hasn’t drank alcohol in years. So, I’m really proud of him, especially in his line of work, it must be so hard.”

“Yeah, as his 50%-chance daughter and for what it’s worth, I’m proud of him, too. “

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

When Courtney heard the rumors going around backstage that night, she had about ten shots of tequila before coming to the conclusion that she wouldn’t tell Roy. But, funny how alcohol works out.

“Yanxxxxx” Courtney drawls out on her phone that she’s struggling to hold up to her ear. But the effort was there. She has absolutely no idea where she is as she presses her warm cheek to the cold faux leather seat of a couch.

“Bitch, did you really just– What?” Roy rolls his eyes as he looks at his phone that hosts Courtney’s current call and the said-blonde on his couch, drooling and staring off into space.

“I gotta–” hiccup “tell you a ssssecret.” Courtney angles her phone to her mouth, so she’s directly speaking to the phone’s microphone. Roy walks over to the drunk girl, grabs her phone and throws it in her purse. He ends the call on his phone before slipping to the kitchen, grabbing a towel and soaking it with cold water. He gives it a good squeeze to remove the excess water before going back to Courtney and placing the towel on her forehead.

“You’re so lucky Riz isn’t here or I would’ve left your drunk ass in the club.” He mutters in annoyance, even though everyone knew he wouldn’t really do that. He could never let anything happen to any of his loved ones, and god knows Riz has seen Courtney or Shane pissed drunk since she was a toddler.

“No,” Courtney says abruptly, hand swatting away Roy’s hand. “Nooooo…” She continues to drawl. “The secret is Ado…” She leans in close, way too close. Roy gets a harsh flashback and hastily pushes Courtney away. With the push, Courtney plops on her back and passes out entirely. Roy sighs, both in frustration and exhaustion. He wouldn’t bother removing Courtney’s makeup, but he did give her the courtesy of removing her wig and cap, as well as unlacing her corset. It all feels familiar to him, taking care of someone and helping them de-drag, except of course, back then he had to strip Bianca off himself and help Danny remove his clothes which then would lead to…

Roy shakes his mind, trying to get rid of the idea before it escalated. He leaves the guest bedroom and makes his way to the kitchen for a glass of wine. He’s just going to pretend he doesn’t know that Courtney was about to say something about Adore as he starts up a design for Rupaul on the granite kitchen counter.

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

“I can’t believe Biadore was ACTUALLY a thing.”

“How can you not? The tension was so obvious, especially during that one part where Adore said she didn’t want to work with Bianca? The sexual tension was just–” Nerissa fans herself before she receives a slight smack and push on her shoulder.

“Dude, you’re so fucking weird. I don’t wanna think about my dad’s sex life OR YOURS!!”

“I’m just telling the truth! The stare was intense.” Nerissa breaks into a fit of giggles at Portia’s face of slight disgust at the idea. “And speaking of, did your dad date anyone again?” Nerissa asks.

“Never anyone serious enough to introduce to me, no. He’d go on dates, sometimes Adore would go on dates. But, yeah. He never really seemed interested in dating anymore, so he put all his attention to me or his and Adore’s music.”

“Do you call Adore “mom”?”

“No, that’s weird!” Portia snorts, “My dad is, well, my dad. He has his own quirks and personality. And, Adore, to me, is just a whole different person. I can’t explain it. Like, I know he’s Adore Delano through and through. But, my mind just sees Adore like a whole different person.” Portia rolls again to her back, so she’s facing the ceiling like her sister. “How about your dad? Did he date anyone?”

“You know what’s weird? I don’t think he ever did, not even dating or flirting with anyone else. He’s always been so closed off to anyone who showed any particular interest.” Nerissa twiddles with her thumb, before scrunching her nose in distaste. “I mean, in some way, I get it. He’s scared to love again. Uncle Shane always said so. I wish I knew why though.”

Portia hums, thoughtfully. Another pregnant pause looms over their conversation. It has gone on for so long that for a moment Nerissa thought Portia was asleep, until…

“I AM SUCH A FUCKING GENIUS!”

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS:

Prologue | Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven | Chapter Eight |

[annie-m-lima-blog]

Hey I found this!

I wanted to write a post, and I found this one on my dashboard. Figured it's a fun thing to do. Especially since I’m still learning my character. 

...Well, Disney’s character. I’m writing a Zootopia fanfiction where the MC is Nick Wilde

QUESTIoNS FOR YOUR OCs

What’s the maximum amount of time your character can sit still with nothing to do? For hours! He’s a supremely lazy fox when he wants to be.

How easy is it for your character to laugh? Super easy, his dry wit is his coping mechanism for everything. A genuine laugh is harder to come by. 

How do they put themselves to bed at night (reading, singing, thinking?) He watches Zootube videos. Specifically scary stuff. He likes being talked at. 

How easy is it to earn their trust? Even after meeting Judy, it’s difficult for him to open up and trust other mammals. He trusts the other ZPD members because he has too but a few months of being around his little bunny friend does not erase the years of being purposely alone.  

How easy is it to earn their mistrust? Easy, but earning mistrust means he trusted you in the first place. Good luck getting him to admit that. 

Do they consider laws flexible, or immovable? Well, yeah. He won’t go too far though. 

What triggers nostalgia for them, most often? Do they enjoy that feeling? Nostalgia isn’t really good for mammals who didn’t have good childhoods. He loves theme parks and scary stories because they were his escape from his reality during his childhood though. 

What were they told to stop/start doing most often as a child Probably running around and pulling pranks on his sister?

Do they swear? Do they remember their first swear word? He sees swearing as an admission of defeat (somebody got to him ) so it’s seldom. His first cuss word was f*ck. He was maybe thirteen and thought it was funny. 

What lie do they most frequently remember telling? Does it haunt them? That he was fine being alone. Now that he knows what friendship is, he couldn’t imagine anything else. 

How do they cope with confusion (seek clarification, pretend they understand, etc)? He asks questions. A lot of questions. He has no problem making efforts to learn. his curiosity is unquenchable.  

How do they deal with an itch found in a place they can’t quite reach? He finds something to scratch it with. 

What color do they think they look best in? Do they actually look best in that color? Green, but he kinda looks like a Christmas tree. I prefer him in blue-but I prefer everybody in blue. Haha 

What animal do they fear most? Polar Bears? Big mammals, he has a small fear of being squished. 

How do they speak? Is what they say usually thought of on the spot, or do they rehearse it in their mind first? He doesn’t really have to rehearse, but he doesn’t speak when rash. He makes sure the smart, witty, but aloof facade is what people get. 

What makes their stomach turn? Strong smells, especially bad ones 

Are they easily embarrassed? Not really

What embarrasses them? Getting caught having emotions, or being socially awkward. It’s a rarity that only happens when he’s already uncomfortable. 

What is their favorite number? 7? 

If they were asked to explain the difference between romantic and platonic or familial love, how would they do so? He’s not gonna answer. He’ll flash a smirk and say they were all useless. 

Why do they get up in the morning? To go make money so that he can travel.  

How does jealousy manifest itself in them (they become possessive, they become aloof, etc)? Aloof. 

How does envy manifest itself in them (they take what they want, they become resentful, etc)? He hauls ass and doesn’t stop until he achieved something better than whatever he was envious of. All without showing a hint of the actual emotion.

Is sex something that they’re comfortable speaking about? To whom? Completely. He doesn’t have time for modesty. 

What are their thoughts on marriage? It’s as useless as a relationship. 

What is their preferred mode of transportation? Walking, when it’s nice out. Driving when he wants to go fast. He hates the subway.  

What causes them to feel dread? Any type of emotional vulnerability. 

Would they prefer a lie over an unpleasant truth? Tell it to him straight. Anything else is useless. 

Do they usually live up to their own ideals? He thought he was, now he’s not so sure. 

Who do they most regret meeting? Sam Walton.  

Who are they the most glad to have met? Judy

Do they have a go-to story in conversation? Or a joke? Not really. 

Could they be considered lazy? Yes, and he’s darn proud of it too.

How hard is it for them to shake a sense of guilt? On the rare occasions, he gets close enough to feel guilt, it’s hard for him to shake.  

How do they treat the things their friends come to them excited about? Are they supportive? He’s supportive of Judy.

Do they actively seek romance, or do they wait for it to fall into their lap? He doesn’t want it. Period. It leads to trouble. 

Do they have a system for remembering names, long lists of numbers, things that need to go in a certain order (like anagrams, putting things to melodies, etc)? He repeats the list until he commits it to memory. 

What memory do they revisit the most often? He does his best to never think of his past. When his mind wanders to it he reaches for any distraction he can. 

How easy is it for them to ignore flaws in other people? Not very, it’s like a glaring light in his face. Even if he doesn’t say anything about it.  

How sensitive are they to their own flaws? He gets shocked when people are actually able to read him well enough to touch on his insecurities. He’ll sulk, but eventually, admit to it and try to work on it. 

How do they feel about children? Eh...not a fan  

How badly do they want to reach their end goal? He doesn’t know he wants it.

If someone asked them to explain their sexuality, how would they do so? He’s pretty much an “I like what I like” kind of guy. He like’s girls of all species. It’s not really an accepted practice, but he makes no point to hide it. 

QUESTIONS FOR CREATORS

A) Why are you excited about this character? I’m excited because I love this character. He is by far one of my favorite Disney guys.  B) What inspired you to create them? I was inspired to write before him because I love making non-emotional characters have emotions. I’m evil like that.   C) Did you have trouble figuring out where they fit in their own story? I did flip between him and Judy for awhile, but I always leaned toward him.  D) Have they always had the same physical appearance, or have you had to edit how they look? I’m doing my best to keep as close to canon as possible while adding my own little twist.  E) Are they someone you would get along with? Would they get along with you? I’d probably annoy him while I fawned over him. I like him because he’s the kind of guy I typically fall for. Go ask my man. Haha  F) What do you feel when you think of your OC (pride, excitement, frustration, etc)? Pride, excitement, a small twisted need to torture him?  G) What trait of theirs bothers you the most? His wit, mainly because I’m worried about writing it.   H) What trait do you admire most? His ability to stay calm and think through his emotions. It’s a character flaw but I have the opposite of his. I can’t control my emotional At.All.  I) Do you prefer to keep them in their canon universe? Yes, I love Zootopia.  J) Did you have to manipulate or exclude canon factors to allow them to create their character? No? What is this?

Well, that took way longer than I thought it would but it was fun nonetheless. It makes me realize where the holes are. So I won’t be too mad it took so long. 

Laters <3

[dearhummingbird]

3, 12, 14 xx

3. rant. just do it

ok this was a draft from when Bon Appetit was going down the drain and i was extremely annoyed and bothered by how the discussion about it was being held in this all-women Slack group i’m in. it really mostly comprises of extremely rich white mid-20year olds who only used to shop at Reformation and only use Glossier/Golde/Milk Makeup/Kosas products. a lot of it probably wont make sense unless you kept up to date with what went on with BA, but two things that i want to note is that 1) i don’t like the me who calls people crazy and goes ??????? when others share wildly different opinions from me, even when i think those opinions are flat out wrong. it’s language that im trying to change bc i also do it when im even mildly annoyed at people, which is bad. that’s one reason why i didnt initially post this here bc i was abit ashamed. idk if thats right or wrong but ya. 2) i didnt share this earlier bc while i still stand by what i said about Gaby being an immigrant status i was and am afraid of being called out as insensitive or wrong. it would be nice to hear opinions about this, if anyone has any at all. but yes, it is very long and very passionate, please dont mind......

this is with regards to the BA drama and the Slack group i mentioned here awhile ago. the people there are so...????? not only is their cancel culture ugly but their flimsy explanations and lack of care for their words just makes everything that comes out of their mouth performative. there’s a whole thread with 150++ messages about the BA situation and i said i was sorely disappointed with Gaby’s willy nilly response to the initial Sohla uprising. for context, Gaby is Argentinian, is BA’s test kitchen manager as well as the oldest member of the BA universe. she posted a story saying: “Hey guys! I am not one for following what the heck is going on! You know me, I do my own thing! I cook and be happy! 💚🌈 💚🌈 💚🌈” while the BIPOC members of BA were risking their jobs by going public about the systemic racism within Conde Nast. the white members of BA had stood in solidarity(🤔) with the BIPOC members, and Gaby is the only one who chose to bow out of all of it. someone replied saying maybe its bc Gaby’s an immigrant, like their mom, who was afraid to get involved in politics of any sorts because doing so in her time meant death. please tell me if im being insensitive but i think thats a grossly biased biography to impose on someone else, esp w such a clearly tonedeaf “💚🌈💚🌈” response at a time like that. i replied that and said yknow what, maybe thats true, maybe its not, but Gaby couldve read the room and given a much more neutral response even if she didnt care about it. THEN someone else replied saying they agreed with the previous person - “[i think] people are being too harsh on her. She is of a different generation who perhaps doesn’t grasp the role of social media in this movement. How can we expect her to condemn her EIC in the most thoughtful, politically correct way, when English is not her first language and the US is not her first country?” ???????? just saying Gaby doesnt “get it” bc shes old and an immigrant? i thought it was wholly condescending and fired back saying Gaby has mentioned being in the states fr a very long time and she knows how to put up highlights on instagram ffs, shes tech and English savvy. i also said Gaby’s language was very telling and tonedeaf “i do my own thing”. then the person replied saying “oh i didnt mean it like that, her response to me was representative of tbings we’ve heard from our own immigrant families right? “A lot of survival as an immigrant is tied to “I do my own thing” and that is inherently privileged while being a victim of the white supremacist system at the same time” 🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔 i did not like the “right?” super annoying rally tactic like actually debate w me dude. and if she hadnt meant to say Gaby didnt “get it” maybe she shouldve worded her thoughts far more carefully. also um..? i understand what youre saying but my whole point is Gaby shouldve been more careful with her words. pegging all of this onto her immigrant status, while may be right, seems so¿ what if Gaby didnt give a fuck, just like she shows she doesnt in her words? then what? like? am i crazy?? then i said i‘d rather she had said nth at all if she was gonna hang her members to dry. THEN THE PERSON RESPONDED, “LETS BE REAL [INSERTS BA’S WHITE MEMBERS] ARENT GNA LOSE THEIR JOBS” ????? I was very clearly talking about the BIPOC members...... why would i talk abt the immune white members..... she mustve barely read anything i said!!!

then w regards to the Delaney situation, some of them were like “he was in college when he used the queer slur?? when i was in high school everyone already knew better than to say it” “19???? way too old to be saying shit like that” sure he shouldve known better but age should not be the issue here. + Delaney has been one of the most vocal BA members abt BLM! hes clearly changed as a person, if not is at least one willing to learn frm mistakes! people were hunting him down on twitter, screenshotting shit frm 2012. they called him a coward fr deleting his twitter and tumblr - but whats the point of digging fr more shit to say “yes Delaney was indeed a bigot frat boy” when you already have a handful. i never knew what cancel culture was until this. other things theyve said include “🚫 no more conde nast 🚫 society has moved past the need for conde nast / ugggghhhhhh damn it, it’s my fault for thinking a white man could be unproblematic” howww. Later on Brad said he would quit if they fired Delaney and everyoneeee was like “duh Brad’s an outdoorsy white man 🥴🥴” ??? 1. THATS A DUMB STATEMENT TO MAKE 2. THE PERSON WHO POSTED THIS IS ALSO WHITE. what if Brad will quit bc Delaneys a friend????? then what? 85% of the BA team is white, Carla and Molly went to Italy while Chaey wasnt even paid fr the Thanksgiving series, Claire gets something crazy like 20k for every gourmet makes, and Molly was the chummiest member with Rapo, and you’re saying “duh Brad’s an outdoorsy white man”?? get your shit together

ok last one is when in response to my point about how Molly was so friendly w Rapo that she was the only one who‘d snap at Rapo as if he wasnt the scary prissy boss the same girl who said Brad is an outdoorsy white man said “oh i actually saw that as a personal coping mechanism against Rapo’s toxicity!!” i really died