#I would make sure to select for a better comb though depending on your goals

[homeofhousechickens]

I'm so excited to start my own chicken breeding project next year. This is my boy Salsa that I'm going to startoff with 💕

Very handsome!

[robertkstone]

2018 Chevrolet Traverse First Drive Review: Staycation

We’re nearing the end of summer vacation season in the U.S., so the Bow Tie brand decided to make its super family-friendly, jumbo three-row crossover—the newly redesigned 2018 Chevrolet Traverse—available for long-weekend trips within the great mitten state of Michigan. The timing coincided perfectly with half of the Motor Trend Detroit office editorial staff’s vacation plans—the other half. That left yours very truly hurriedly wheeling the new Traverse all over greater Detroit by myself, usually running late to cover the myriad events of a very busy week. As a result, I took greater note of the V-6’s 310 hp and 266 lb-ft of torque, the transmission’s nine well-spaced ratios, and the suspension’s sharpened responsiveness than I did its cool new tilt-n-slide (even with a child seat!) middle-row captain’s chair, the grand visibility out of its huge windows and dual sunroofs, its 5,000-pound towing capacity, or its 38.2-inch third-row headroom (up from 37.8).

Trust me, despite having grown in every exterior dimension—the largest being a 2.0-inch wheelbase stretch—the most noticeable dimension change from behind the wheel is curb weight. Depending on the model, this big boy has dropped something near 350 pounds. Compounding that roughly 7 percent weight loss is an 8 percent power gain and a 13 percent improvement in first-gear “leverage.” Tally that all up, and this thing felt at least a size class smaller every time a traffic light turned green and I floored it. Chevy is claiming a “sub-7-second” 0–60 time, which compares well with the 7.7-second time we recorded on a loaded all-wheel-drive Traverse LTZ. (Expect the optional 255-hp 2.0-liter turbo to be a bit slower, but perhaps not as much as you’d think—it’ll only be offered with front-drive, it weighs less, and it makes 29 lb-ft more torque than the V-6.)

With all those extra ratios available for selection within milliseconds, it’s a snap to drop the hammer and squirt into an opening in an adjacent lane of swifter-moving traffic. Once up to my comfortable top-gear freeway-cruising speed, the 25 percent broader ratio spread between first and ninth gears left the engine spinning 8 percent slower than the 2016 Traverse’s V-6 would have been. But perhaps the best thing about this nine-speed automatic is how unnoticeable it is. Shifts feel, as the bard of Honolulu, Bruno Mars, put it, “smoother than a fresh jar of Skippy.” There’s never the sense of constant gear shuffling that we’ve noticed in many other nine-speeds, and I never detected a moment’s indecision when a change of mind about throttle position can result in the gearbox clunking into a gear it belatedly determined was best. One constructive criticism for the tranny team: Program in a sport shift logic that holds lower gears longer, and give nerds like me a readout on the display that shows which gear I’m in. Your Ford colleagues are bound to offer these items (as they do with their version of your similarly shared 10-speed automatic in the F-150).

In Chevy’s quest for improved fuel economy, the Traverse’s lighter weight and better-optimized transmission gears are abetted by a sophisticated auto start/stop system that actually motorizes the starter pinion so that it can be synchronized with the speed of the flywheel. Why? So that on those rare occasions when you’re coasting to a stop and the engine shuts down but then the light turns green and you hit the gas before coming to a complete stop, this synchronizer gizmo lets the engine restart before the engine completely stops without that awful “prang” sound you used to get when accidentally trying to start a running engine. These efforts pay off in a 3-mpg improvement in EPA combined fuel economy for both the front-wheel-drive and all-wheel-drive V-6 variants, to 21 and 20 mpg, respectively. (GM is estimating the 2.0-liter front-driver will hit 22 mpg combined.)

Another area of intense effort on the part of the Traverse development team was chassis tuning, where the goal was to preserve the already comfy ride quality while sharpening the crossover’s dynamic handling—even when heavily loaded. On the ride-preservation/improvement front, there are new ZF shocks all around, and they include special preloaded valves that improve damping performance over the smallest inputs and also make the shocks quieter. In short, they make simpler twin-tube shocks behave more like fancy monotube ones. On the handling front, the lateral links in the new five-link rear suspension are hardened, and the ride-control (longitudinal) mounts are hydraulic on the front strut control arms. The front mounts of the rear-suspension cradle are also hydraulic for improved isolation. And to help out the rear coil springs as you load the Traverse down, there’s a big, tall, multimaterial “bump stop” that acts kind of like a variable-rate helper spring and ensures a soft “landing” if it does bottom out.

My Friday morning engagement (sampling the aforementioned Ford 10-speed) was out in the country, affording an opportunity to hustle down a deserted twisty road en route back to HQ, and indeed this big honker seemed to change direction pretty smartly, with minimal roll and none of the kind of slop you often get as all the rubber bits squish before the suspension takes a set. (Any of my vacation-bound colleagues trying maneuvers like these with their broods onboard surely coated their Traverses’ interiors with Cheerios and baby spew while screams of protest drowned out the shocks’ newfound quietness.)

Things did calm down Sunday and Monday, giving me a chance to explore the Traverse’s vast interior (it’s 10 percent larger than the outgoing model), which will accommodate the essential 4-by-8-foot sheet of paneling. Praise be! There’s an underfloor cargo stowage bin that can swallow a smaller roll-aboard bag behind the third-row seat, and there are USB charging ports within a comfortable cord’s reach of every seating position.

Rear-seat comfort was less impressive. The middle-row captain’s chairs felt hard and flat, though they’re elevated sufficiently above the front seats to afford stadium visibility. The wheelbase stretch was supposed to pay off in third-row comfort, but my 5-foot-10 frame felt cramped, and the low cushion and still-too-high floor forced a knees-high seating posture. The VW Atlas we had in a week earlier was vastly more comfortable back there. At least the passenger-side tilt/slide middle-row chair makes it easy to climb in and out, but I fear that children will struggle to operate its latch and will just scoot between the seats to climb in and out through wide rear doors, which now feature stays that hold them open in three positions.

My takeaway from a long weekend spent not vacationing in the Traverse: It’ll make up time when you’re running late about as well as any seven- or eight-seater can, but a sport transmission program would be a welcome upgrade. The ride is comfortable and quiet, it looks good on the outside, and it fits tons of stuff on the inside, but to rank as the ultimate vacation-mobile, the rear-seating comfort could use improvement. That’s a respectably small to-do list for a new Chevy.

2018 Chevrolet Traverse BASE PRICE $30,875-$52,995 VEHICLE LAYOUT Front-engine, FWD/AWD, 7-8-pass, 4-door SUV ENGINES 2.0L/255-hp/295-lb-ft* turbocharged DOHC 16-valve I-4; 3.6L/310-hp/266-lb-ft DOHC 24-valve V-6 TRANSMISSION 9-speed automatic CURB WEIGHT 4,350-4,600 lb (mfr) WHEELBASE 120.9 in LENGTH X WIDTH X HEIGHT 204.3 x 78.6 x 70.7 in 0-60 MPH 6.9-7.4 sec (mfr est) EPA CITY/HWY/COMB FUEL ECON 17-20/25-25/20-22 mpg* ENERGY CONSUMPTION, CITY/HWY 169-198/135-135 kW-hrs/100 miles* CO2 EMISSIONS, COMB 0.88-0.98 lb/mile* ON SALE IN U.S. Currently *2.0-liter hp, torque, EPA figures estimated

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[jesusvasser]

2018 Chevrolet Traverse First Drive Review: Staycation

We’re nearing the end of summer vacation season in the U.S., so the Bow Tie brand decided to make its super family-friendly, jumbo three-row crossover—the newly redesigned 2018 Chevrolet Traverse—available for long-weekend trips within the great mitten state of Michigan. The timing coincided perfectly with half of the Motor Trend Detroit office editorial staff’s vacation plans—the other half. That left yours very truly hurriedly wheeling the new Traverse all over greater Detroit by myself, usually running late to cover the myriad events of a very busy week. As a result, I took greater note of the V-6’s 310 hp and 266 lb-ft of torque, the transmission’s nine well-spaced ratios, and the suspension’s sharpened responsiveness than I did its cool new tilt-n-slide (even with a child seat!) middle-row captain’s chair, the grand visibility out of its huge windows and dual sunroofs, its 5,000-pound towing capacity, or its 38.2-inch third-row headroom (up from 37.8).

Trust me, despite having grown in every exterior dimension—the largest being a 2.0-inch wheelbase stretch—the most noticeable dimension change from behind the wheel is curb weight. Depending on the model, this big boy has dropped something near 350 pounds. Compounding that roughly 7 percent weight loss is an 8 percent power gain and a 13 percent improvement in first-gear “leverage.” Tally that all up, and this thing felt at least a size class smaller every time a traffic light turned green and I floored it. Chevy is claiming a “sub-7-second” 0–60 time, which compares well with the 7.7-second time we recorded on a loaded all-wheel-drive Traverse LTZ. (Expect the optional 255-hp 2.0-liter turbo to be a bit slower, but perhaps not as much as you’d think—it’ll only be offered with front-drive, it weighs less, and it makes 29 lb-ft more torque than the V-6.)

With all those extra ratios available for selection within milliseconds, it’s a snap to drop the hammer and squirt into an opening in an adjacent lane of swifter-moving traffic. Once up to my comfortable top-gear freeway-cruising speed, the 25 percent broader ratio spread between first and ninth gears left the engine spinning 8 percent slower than the 2016 Traverse’s V-6 would have been. But perhaps the best thing about this nine-speed automatic is how unnoticeable it is. Shifts feel, as the bard of Honolulu, Bruno Mars, put it, “smoother than a fresh jar of Skippy.” There’s never the sense of constant gear shuffling that we’ve noticed in many other nine-speeds, and I never detected a moment’s indecision when a change of mind about throttle position can result in the gearbox clunking into a gear it belatedly determined was best. One constructive criticism for the tranny team: Program in a sport shift logic that holds lower gears longer, and give nerds like me a readout on the display that shows which gear I’m in. Your Ford colleagues are bound to offer these items (as they do with their version of your similarly shared 10-speed automatic in the F-150).

In Chevy’s quest for improved fuel economy, the Traverse’s lighter weight and better-optimized transmission gears are abetted by a sophisticated auto start/stop system that actually motorizes the starter pinion so that it can be synchronized with the speed of the flywheel. Why? So that on those rare occasions when you’re coasting to a stop and the engine shuts down but then the light turns green and you hit the gas before coming to a complete stop, this synchronizer gizmo lets the engine restart before the engine completely stops without that awful “prang” sound you used to get when accidentally trying to start a running engine. These efforts pay off in a 3-mpg improvement in EPA combined fuel economy for both the front-wheel-drive and all-wheel-drive V-6 variants, to 21 and 20 mpg, respectively. (GM is estimating the 2.0-liter front-driver will hit 22 mpg combined.)

Another area of intense effort on the part of the Traverse development team was chassis tuning, where the goal was to preserve the already comfy ride quality while sharpening the crossover’s dynamic handling—even when heavily loaded. On the ride-preservation/improvement front, there are new ZF shocks all around, and they include special preloaded valves that improve damping performance over the smallest inputs and also make the shocks quieter. In short, they make simpler twin-tube shocks behave more like fancy monotube ones. On the handling front, the lateral links in the new five-link rear suspension are hardened, and the ride-control (longitudinal) mounts are hydraulic on the front strut control arms. The front mounts of the rear-suspension cradle are also hydraulic for improved isolation. And to help out the rear coil springs as you load the Traverse down, there’s a big, tall, multimaterial “bump stop” that acts kind of like a variable-rate helper spring and ensures a soft “landing” if it does bottom out.

My Friday morning engagement (sampling the aforementioned Ford 10-speed) was out in the country, affording an opportunity to hustle down a deserted twisty road en route back to HQ, and indeed this big honker seemed to change direction pretty smartly, with minimal roll and none of the kind of slop you often get as all the rubber bits squish before the suspension takes a set. (Any of my vacation-bound colleagues trying maneuvers like these with their broods onboard surely coated their Traverses’ interiors with Cheerios and baby spew while screams of protest drowned out the shocks’ newfound quietness.)

Things did calm down Sunday and Monday, giving me a chance to explore the Traverse’s vast interior (it’s 10 percent larger than the outgoing model), which will accommodate the essential 4-by-8-foot sheet of paneling. Praise be! There’s an underfloor cargo stowage bin that can swallow a smaller roll-aboard bag behind the third-row seat, and there are USB charging ports within a comfortable cord’s reach of every seating position.

Rear-seat comfort was less impressive. The middle-row captain’s chairs felt hard and flat, though they’re elevated sufficiently above the front seats to afford stadium visibility. The wheelbase stretch was supposed to pay off in third-row comfort, but my 5-foot-10 frame felt cramped, and the low cushion and still-too-high floor forced a knees-high seating posture. The VW Atlas we had in a week earlier was vastly more comfortable back there. At least the passenger-side tilt/slide middle-row chair makes it easy to climb in and out, but I fear that children will struggle to operate its latch and will just scoot between the seats to climb in and out through wide rear doors, which now feature stays that hold them open in three positions.

My takeaway from a long weekend spent not vacationing in the Traverse: It’ll make up time when you’re running late about as well as any seven- or eight-seater can, but a sport transmission program would be a welcome upgrade. The ride is comfortable and quiet, it looks good on the outside, and it fits tons of stuff on the inside, but to rank as the ultimate vacation-mobile, the rear-seating comfort could use improvement. That’s a respectably small to-do list for a new Chevy.

2018 Chevrolet Traverse BASE PRICE $30,875-$52,995 VEHICLE LAYOUT Front-engine, FWD/AWD, 7-8-pass, 4-door SUV ENGINES 2.0L/255-hp/295-lb-ft* turbocharged DOHC 16-valve I-4; 3.6L/310-hp/266-lb-ft DOHC 24-valve V-6 TRANSMISSION 9-speed automatic CURB WEIGHT 4,350-4,600 lb (mfr) WHEELBASE 120.9 in LENGTH X WIDTH X HEIGHT 204.3 x 78.6 x 70.7 in 0-60 MPH 6.9-7.4 sec (mfr est) EPA CITY/HWY/COMB FUEL ECON 17-20/25-25/20-22 mpg* ENERGY CONSUMPTION, CITY/HWY 169-198/135-135 kW-hrs/100 miles* CO2 EMISSIONS, COMB 0.88-0.98 lb/mile* ON SALE IN U.S. Currently *2.0-liter hp, torque, EPA figures estimated

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[theworstbob]

yellin’ at songs: week 32

brief reviews of the songs which debuted on the billboard hot 100 the weeks of 16 august 1997, 18 august 2007, and 19 august 2017

8.16.1997

6) "2 Become 1," by Spice Girls

This is just a '90s R&B song! This song doesn't even have the courtesy to be kitschy! This is completely indistinguishable from the rest of the '90s R&B, breathy whispered vocals about sex. There's no -- "Be a little bit wiser, baby/Put it on/Put it on" -- okay. OKAY. Sure. I guess that's something. If your song has no other value, might as well throw quality actionable advice in there. I hope the next song is some milquetoast R&B beat while people sing lines like "Your stomach takes a while to tell your brain it's full/Don't have that third slice of the ‘za, baby."

51) "All I Want," by 702

Oh hell yeah, I love this. I love that this is a Missy Elliott track, and I also love that this group did the titular song for Pootie Tang. I am way into this. This is a breezy summer jam that hits all the Good '90s R&B buttons.

54) "To Make You Feel My Love," by Billy Joel

this sounds exactly like you think it would sound and is as pleasant to listen to as you think it would be and i'm just gonna bounce after 30 seconds because i get it, i see what he's trying to do here and don't want to stick around to see if he pulls it off

55) "Big Bad Mama," by Foxy Brown ft./Dru Hill

I don't disagree with this! I can't find any way to hook onto this, but I already called one thing a breezy summer jam because I didn't feel like thinking too hard about it, so I'm in a bit of a predicament here. Like, this song is OK. It has a memorable bass line, Foxy Brown's pretty great at her thing, and whichever member of Dru Hill showed up sure did the most singing of anyone in 1997!, but like I can see why we've left this behind. It's fine. No one needed this one unearthed, though. We've found some buried treasures, y'know? This is like finding a buried booklet of commemorative state quarters. Like, neat! But also, not even $15.

83) "Far from Yours," by O.C. ft./Yvette Michele

"I be the Chosen One/Beyond the Moet and Cristal/A son of King and a Queen/Therefore ability/For song run in my genetics/I gave ideas to L. Ron Hubbard to write books on Dianetics" ...Setting aside the major issues I have with this man's rhyme schemes, IS HE TAKING CREDIT FOR SCIENTOLOGY. IS THI -- IS HE SAYING THAT HE IS THE INSPIRATION FOR SCIENTOLOGY. What the fuck kind of boast. He's saying his raps are so powerful they inspired a crazy man to write books about bad science. I am flummoxed by this song. This would have been just another okay song by a rapper who honestly just seems like a normal-ass dude who somehow wandered into a recoriding studio, but HE'S TAKING CREDIT FOR L. RON HUBBARD'S IDEAS. WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF LUNATIC IS THIS MAN.

89) "Tide Is High," by Angelina

Someone went to the store and said, "OH BOY! Another new verson of 'Tide Is High!' I gotta pick up this new interpretation of this song, which is of course someone's favorite song ever because it's MY favorite song ever!" Also none of the back-up dancers in the video looked like they were trying their absolute best. They knew where they were. They knew it didn't matter. They took a few plays off and got that check. I have so much respect for those backup dancers. ROCK TO THE BEAT ROCK ROCK TO THE BEAT, ROCK TO THE BEAT ROCK ROCK TO THE BEAT and so forth

92) "Relax & Party," by Ivory

So I've been sick the past couple days, which is why this post is going up on Wednesday and why there's no Thing Journal for last week (SUNDAY DOUBLE) and real talk why this has been a weak edition of YAS so far, ‘cuz I'll be honest, I'm still in the doldrums. My back hurts, which is a fun side effect of getting sick in your late 20s, I've found. So I'm not. In a mood? Conducive to caring about this song. I'm sure this is OK, but honestly, right now, in this moment in which we find ourselves, me and this song, sharing the same space on this planet, I could not care less about the things it wants to bring to my life. It's a stupid song and doesn't do anything. It just goes on for four minutes. Great. Great! Hey, just release an album of that fucking bass line for fifty minutes, honestly, it's probably your best bet if you want me to at least respect you.

95) "Dancehall Queen," by Beenie Man ft./Chevelle Franklyn

So there are two different versions of the song "Dancehall Queen" that I could find. There is this one, but there is also one released more recently with Lady Sovereign as the featured artist. So I have a few questions about our beautiful ever-expanding dying universe: 1) What did Chevelle Franklyn do to get deposed? 2) Does Chevelle FRanklyn give input into the decisions Lady Sovreign makes? 3) Who gave Beenie Man the powers of coronation? As far as I can tell, he does not proclaim himself the Dancehall King. 4) How often does the Dancehall Queen title change hands? 5) Is there a library that has data on the Dancehall Queen history which I can look up? 6) What are some books on the Dancehall Queen succession which you would recommend? Let me know in the comments! Hit that follow button and LIKE THIS POST!

8.18.2007

28) "Me Love," Sean Kingston

This is like a song you enjoy if you've never enjoyed a song before. If you're someone who appreciates music and attends symphonies and has opinions on concertos, and you're approached with this song, you'll probably use snooty music language to say, "This is a delightful confection!" Or like, if your musical diet consists entirely of Gary Jules' cover of Mad World and songs of that ilk, if the only songs you've been allowed to enjoy in this life are Gary Jules' "Mad World" cover and other songs which could have been selected for the Donnie Darko soundtrack, and you hear this song for the first time, this is probably the most amazing thing you've ever heard. This would sound so revolutionary. But if you've even heard one other fun pop song, you know this is useless.

89) "Free and Easy (Down the Road I Go)," Dierks Bentley

it is good when things are nice! at last, a song that says what none of us are brave to say out loud

90) "All My Friends Say," Luke Bryan

I think a couple months ago I tabbed this as a semi-iconic Luke Bryan song, in the sense that it's a song I hear and immediately attribute to Luke Bryan, which is something I can't do for any Blake Shelton song. But like, this is the song that establishes Luke Bryan's persona -- he's a free-wheelin' sumbitch who's gonna drink too much and try not to drunk-dial any ex-girls. There's personality in this song, a hack and shitty personality, but hey at least he hacked up and/or shitted out an identifiable character. All Blake Shelton's songs are about a man who wishes things would either be better or remain the same, depending on how good they presently are. The song is garbage and Luke Bryan only ever got worse, sure, but it is undeniably a product of Luke Bryan’s particular brand of dunderheaded twanging.

100) "Can U Believe," Robin Thicke

There is a long list of things I need to do with my life. Near the top are items like "only wear a suit at your little sister's wedding," "learn the lttp any% nmg speedrun," and "write a whole good thing," you know, standard stuff, standard life goals, and then there's a million pages of things I will never accomplish. Nowhere on that list was "listen to Robin Thicke tell you that I don't know when someone's watching." I did not need to hear Robin Thicke tell me he was stalking me before I died. I could have learned the Blind script with this time. Maybe this is about God? But it's not even vaguley Christian, he just randomly starts saying you never know when someone's watching, which is only something anyone says WHEN THEY ARE PRESENTLY LOOKING AT YOU THROUGH A TWO-WAY MIRROR. Been a decade of garbage with this man, my gosh.

8.19.2017

(38) "You Da Baddest," by Future ft./Nicki Minaj

Beach Future is such a weird thing to consider. I'm on the record as being pro-Beach Future in general, it's not as random a pivot as the time Lil Wayne picked up the electric guitar and said "OH YEAH! THIS IS A THING!" but it's still hard to get the brain around the idea of Beach Future after, what, three years and roughly 20 albums of morose, despondent Future? All of the Future songs I know are about the nightmare of being Famous and codeine, and now he's dropped two songs that are just, "Yeah, man, chillax! Life's pretty breezy, friends, pull up a chair, let's just enjoy a sunset together!" I'm into it? But it feels like the world is imbalanced right now. Beach Future has completely thrown off my equilibrium and I am Scared.

(68) "Unforgettable," by Thomas Rhett

Ah. Balance! After making a surprisingly hot '80s jam earlier this year, Thomas Rhett just sort of bleats over an acoustic guitar for two and a half bland minutes. This song tries to turn the word "mangorita" into a stirring kick-off to its chorus, and while I recognize the enormity of the task it placed upon itself, that doesn't mean it didn't fail to accomplish its goals. "From your blue jeans to your shoes/Girl, the night was just like you/Unforgettable." I'D NEVER SEEN JEANS JUST THAT BLUE BEFORE. I NEVER EVEN KNEW THEY MADE BLUE JEANS IN THAT PARTICULAR SHADE OF BLUE. WHY, THEY WERE... DARE I SAY? TURQUOISE! ALL HISTORY'S SCULPTORS DEVOTED THEIR LIVES TRYING TO MOLD YOU

(85) "When it Rains it Pours," by Luke Combs

A lot of the reason I don’t mind Rascal Flatts and Keith Urban when we run through 2007 is because, when I was growing up, my mom would only listen to country music, and those artists are the ones I minded the least when we were on the half-hour rides to and from church. I forged deep and lasting connections with the dudes I minded the least of anyone else. This song is definitely "best song on the ride to church" quality. It has a Toby Keith-y sense of humor which is more or less agreeable -- I can't imagine any scenario that a waitress at Hooters is impressed enough by any customer at Hooters to leave their number, but here I am, complaining that my suspension of disbelief in a country song was interrupted -- and it's unique, I haven't heard a lot of "fuck her, she's outta my hair!" songs from dude country artists this year. It’s not “I’m Gonna Miss Her,” but what is? Once again, Luke Combs has made a song that's unique enough that I can appreciate its charm, but not so intriguing that I'm gonna seek him out on my own. I'll give his next album a spin, see if he takes the right lessons to heart, but the one he’s got out now, I think I’m good!

(87) "They Don't Know," by Jason Aldean

"Just another field/Just another farm/No, it's the place we grew up on." Jason Aldean is a multi-millionaire who owns several hundred acres of land in a major metropolitan area nad has the chutzpah to speak for the common man. Fuck this dude and fuck him for this Trump-vote of a song.

(88) "Honest," by The Chainsmokers

hey guys the chainsmokers made a song about how they're sensitive boys who're sad about breakup, wow what a fascinating new look for these cats, truly evolving as artists before our very eyes. see, this is the one where they go "whoa-oh." i don't think they've gone "woah-oh" in a song yet. this is a pony certainly capable of developing a second trick!

(89) "The Weekend," by SZA

"What kind of deal is two days?/I need me at least 'bout for of 'em" is one of the single-saddest lyrics 2017 has produced. This song is so good. SZA in general is so good, but I never had to deal with how good this song is, given how much there is to parse with Ctrl. When's the last time we heard from a side piece's perspective, y'know? When's the last time we heard how a booty call felt about being a booty call? We heard "Booty Call," which was about the act of engaging in a booty call, but we don't know anything about the booty call's wants and desires outside of that moment. I enjoy hearing this perspective on the events, hearing from the girl the '90s R&B dude has to apologize for seeing, because that's a person, too, that's a person who's alive and lives a life of their own. It took us until 2017 to get the side piece's take on things. What were the rest of us doing?

(90) "New Rules," by Dua Lipa

This is really enjoyable. Nothing terribly complex, just a "don't fuck your ex" jam, but it's confidently delivered (I get the sense that Dua Lipa is a much better singer than the current musical trends are going to let her be), and I love the subtle horn drop. Evidently, the producer of this song was also involved with "Bad Liar" and "Now and Later," so I'm getting on the Ian Kirkpatrick train. I approve! Great work, all.

(93) "I Wish I Knew You," by The Revivalists

oh wow fuck everything about this. where did this come from? why am i listening to this? did 13 reasons why drop another season? who wanted this. who wanted another indie band biting the hell out of franz ferdinand. they're not even biting franz ferdinand, they're biting all those bands that were biting from franz ferdinand a few years ago, except they're doing so nakedly, "the revivalists" is code for "we have no original ideas." way to revive 2013, yeah dude, it was so long since i heard the neighbourhood, i'm so happy you're reviving four years ago. also this willy wonka-ass muthafucka's hat is stupid. i'm honestly not sure i'm reacting to the song as much as i am the stupid goddamn hat in the music video. (also: i'm not into this song, despite the presence of a saxophone. i have limits. i'm not gonna go home with just any brass instrument, you guys.) white men ruin everything.

(94) "Every Little Thing," by Carly Pearce

Well, number one, it's a country music song with actual drums, so it's automatically starting with 95 points out of a possible 100. This is dope. "They say time is the only healer/God, I hope that isn't right/'Cause right now I'd die to not remember." Fuck, man. That is heavy. And this is a solidly-produced song, too, there's enough going on that the song feels rich and lived-in, but not so much so that it's distracting, it's definitely in the backseat wearing a seatbelt so the lyrics and what might be the saddest fucking voice in 2017 country music can drive in peace. More from this woman, and more from other women, look how good you are when you let women do things, country music!

(97) "Learn to Let Go," by Kesha

I think this is fine. I'm not as into EDM-lite Kesha as I am Kesha declaring her womanhood backed by a million beautiful horns, but this is fine! Three songs. Three songs is enough distance to start delivering back-handed not-criticisms. But no, like, I wouldn't mind this as the opening track to the album, this sets a tone and opens up the possibility for cooler things to come, but on its own, hey! It's just alright, and that's fine! I'm just glad Kesha's making music, y'know?

(98) "All the Pretty Girls," by Kenny Chesney

this song wasn't even released in 2016, what is it doing here, what, why would, i don't, how did we end up here? what do we hope to accomplish while we're here? did he just say "don't blow my cover on freedom night?" what is freedom night? i don't -- you know what country radio, you batted .400 this week. that's ted williams hype, right there. .400 is better than any of us ever could have anticipated, and i can appreciate that you got things as right as you ever possibly could. please tell me what freedom night is, though.

(99) "For Her," by Chris Lane

...adjust that number down to .333. i'm sorry. i saw the haircut and assumed edm, which you'll agree is a fair assumption to make. this dude sucks. he is trying his best with that falsetto but, and i hate to repeat myself, you can't make your own outsized ambition an excuse for your failure. know your limits. i'm sorry i was ever lukewarm about any kesha song. i kinda feel bad for saying those things about the revivalists' hat. this was a good week apart from the bro country! "For her I would walk a straight line/Wear out the soles of my shoes for her." WOAH! SLOW DOWN, BUDDY! LET'S NOT MAKE ANY PROMISES WE CAN'T KEEP, NOW! Careful! Girls remember things you say to them! Imagine how disappointed she'll be when every day she spends with you your shoes still shine as bright as they did the day she met you.

Who won the week?

Well, 2007′s best song was a Luke Bryan joint, so that’s out. Think we gotta give it to 2017. Four shitty country songs, yeah, but 1997 countered with Spice Girls and a Billy Joel cover of a Bob Dylan song, so those cancel out, and the cream of 2017 was much better than the best 1997 gave us this week. I’m still thinking about that Carly Pearce joint, that was really cool, and it anchors an earned win for 2017. THE STANDINGS: 2017: 12 1997: 11 2007: 9 Next week: keep your heart, Three Stacks.

[robertkstone]

2018 Chevrolet Traverse First Drive Review: Staycation

We’re nearing the end of summer vacation season in the U.S., so the Bow Tie brand decided to make its super family-friendly, jumbo three-row crossover—the newly redesigned 2018 Chevrolet Traverse—available for long-weekend trips within the great mitten state of Michigan. The timing coincided perfectly with half of the Motor Trend Detroit office editorial staff’s vacation plans—the other half. That left yours very truly hurriedly wheeling the new Traverse all over greater Detroit by myself, usually running late to cover the myriad events of a very busy week. As a result, I took greater note of the V-6’s 310 hp and 266 lb-ft of torque, the transmission’s nine well-spaced ratios, and the suspension’s sharpened responsiveness than I did its cool new tilt-n-slide (even with a child seat!) middle-row captain’s chair, the grand visibility out of its huge windows and dual sunroofs, its 5,000-pound towing capacity, or its 38.2-inch third-row headroom (up from 37.8).

Trust me, despite having grown in every exterior dimension—the largest being a 2.0-inch wheelbase stretch—the most noticeable dimension change from behind the wheel is curb weight. Depending on the model, this big boy has dropped something near 350 pounds. Compounding that roughly 7 percent weight loss is an 8 percent power gain and a 13 percent improvement in first-gear “leverage.” Tally that all up, and this thing felt at least a size class smaller every time a traffic light turned green and I floored it. Chevy is claiming a “sub-7-second” 0–60 time, which compares well with the 7.7-second time we recorded on a loaded all-wheel-drive Traverse LTZ. (Expect the optional 255-hp 2.0-liter turbo to be a bit slower, but perhaps not as much as you’d think—it’ll only be offered with front-drive, it weighs less, and it makes 29 lb-ft more torque than the V-6.)

With all those extra ratios available for selection within milliseconds, it’s a snap to drop the hammer and squirt into an opening in an adjacent lane of swifter-moving traffic. Once up to my comfortable top-gear freeway-cruising speed, the 25 percent broader ratio spread between first and ninth gears left the engine spinning 8 percent slower than the 2016 Traverse’s V-6 would have been. But perhaps the best thing about this nine-speed automatic is how unnoticeable it is. Shifts feel, as the bard of Honolulu, Bruno Mars, put it, “smoother than a fresh jar of Skippy.” There’s never the sense of constant gear shuffling that we’ve noticed in many other nine-speeds, and I never detected a moment’s indecision when a change of mind about throttle position can result in the gearbox clunking into a gear it belatedly determined was best. One constructive criticism for the tranny team: Program in a sport shift logic that holds lower gears longer, and give nerds like me a readout on the display that shows which gear I’m in. Your Ford colleagues are bound to offer these items (as they do with their version of your similarly shared 10-speed automatic in the F-150).

In Chevy’s quest for improved fuel economy, the Traverse’s lighter weight and better-optimized transmission gears are abetted by a sophisticated auto start/stop system that actually motorizes the starter pinion so that it can be synchronized with the speed of the flywheel. Why? So that on those rare occasions when you’re coasting to a stop and the engine shuts down but then the light turns green and you hit the gas before coming to a complete stop, this synchronizer gizmo lets the engine restart before the engine completely stops without that awful “prang” sound you used to get when accidentally trying to start a running engine. These efforts pay off in a 3-mpg improvement in EPA combined fuel economy for both the front-wheel-drive and all-wheel-drive V-6 variants, to 21 and 20 mpg, respectively. (GM is estimating the 2.0-liter front-driver will hit 22 mpg combined.)

Another area of intense effort on the part of the Traverse development team was chassis tuning, where the goal was to preserve the already comfy ride quality while sharpening the crossover’s dynamic handling—even when heavily loaded. On the ride-preservation/improvement front, there are new ZF shocks all around, and they include special preloaded valves that improve damping performance over the smallest inputs and also make the shocks quieter. In short, they make simpler twin-tube shocks behave more like fancy monotube ones. On the handling front, the lateral links in the new five-link rear suspension are hardened, and the ride-control (longitudinal) mounts are hydraulic on the front strut control arms. The front mounts of the rear-suspension cradle are also hydraulic for improved isolation. And to help out the rear coil springs as you load the Traverse down, there’s a big, tall, multimaterial “bump stop” that acts kind of like a variable-rate helper spring and ensures a soft “landing” if it does bottom out.

My Friday morning engagement (sampling the aforementioned Ford 10-speed) was out in the country, affording an opportunity to hustle down a deserted twisty road en route back to HQ, and indeed this big honker seemed to change direction pretty smartly, with minimal roll and none of the kind of slop you often get as all the rubber bits squish before the suspension takes a set. (Any of my vacation-bound colleagues trying maneuvers like these with their broods onboard surely coated their Traverses’ interiors with Cheerios and baby spew while screams of protest drowned out the shocks’ newfound quietness.)

Things did calm down Sunday and Monday, giving me a chance to explore the Traverse’s vast interior (it’s 10 percent larger than the outgoing model), which will accommodate the essential 4-by-8-foot sheet of paneling. Praise be! There’s an underfloor cargo stowage bin that can swallow a smaller roll-aboard bag behind the third-row seat, and there are USB charging ports within a comfortable cord’s reach of every seating position.

Rear-seat comfort was less impressive. The middle-row captain’s chairs felt hard and flat, though they’re elevated sufficiently above the front seats to afford stadium visibility. The wheelbase stretch was supposed to pay off in third-row comfort, but my 5-foot-10 frame felt cramped, and the low cushion and still-too-high floor forced a knees-high seating posture. The VW Atlas we had in a week earlier was vastly more comfortable back there. At least the passenger-side tilt/slide middle-row chair makes it easy to climb in and out, but I fear that children will struggle to operate its latch and will just scoot between the seats to climb in and out through wide rear doors, which now feature stays that hold them open in three positions.

My takeaway from a long weekend spent not vacationing in the Traverse: It’ll make up time when you’re running late about as well as any seven- or eight-seater can, but a sport transmission program would be a welcome upgrade. The ride is comfortable and quiet, it looks good on the outside, and it fits tons of stuff on the inside, but to rank as the ultimate vacation-mobile, the rear-seating comfort could use improvement. That’s a respectably small to-do list for a new Chevy.

2018 Chevrolet Traverse BASE PRICE $30,875-$52,995 VEHICLE LAYOUT Front-engine, FWD/AWD, 7-8-pass, 4-door SUV ENGINES 2.0L/255-hp/295-lb-ft* turbocharged DOHC 16-valve I-4; 3.6L/310-hp/266-lb-ft DOHC 24-valve V-6 TRANSMISSION 9-speed automatic CURB WEIGHT 4,350-4,600 lb (mfr) WHEELBASE 120.9 in LENGTH X WIDTH X HEIGHT 204.3 x 78.6 x 70.7 in 0-60 MPH 6.9-7.4 sec (mfr est) EPA CITY/HWY/COMB FUEL ECON 17-20/25-25/20-22 mpg* ENERGY CONSUMPTION, CITY/HWY 169-198/135-135 kW-hrs/100 miles* CO2 EMISSIONS, COMB 0.88-0.98 lb/mile* ON SALE IN U.S. Currently *2.0-liter hp, torque, EPA figures estimated