#I wonder what the full lyrics say
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
yuseirra · 6 months ago
Text
Oshi no ko spoilers!!
Continuation from this post:
My thoughts are going wild rn thinking of just what exactly kamiki's motives may be.
I thought about Ai a lot when I listened to the song IDOL, and I'm pretty positive Mephisto would have to do with him(the final lines of this song should be something that he says to his children. That much seems pretty clear)
But what if that entire song (and the new op) is from his perspective? Those two songs are crammed with craving and longing towards a loved one. Kamiki doesn't seem to be so attached to his life, in Mephisto, he even tells his children to "aim well" and this indicates he doesn't mind his own kids trying to take revenge on him, rather, he even go as far as encouraging it. He might even accept being punished/killed by their hands.
So why, and for what reason does he intend to do with harming people with life that's deemed to have great value if he is, if he feels that way about himself?
I think this'll have to do with his feelings towards Ai. He has an obsession with her and is still attached to her after all these years, right? The reason why he tries to make his own life(that he doesn't really care about;) have more value by making it carry heavy things through taking valuable ones.. Could be due to his reasoning to make it worthy of trading it off with Ai's as a tribute of some sort. That'd explain why he's so nonchalant about his own fate but still works to make his life to be "heavy" and carry a weight.
I'm getting this feeling after having seen some of the lyrics mentioning "wishes" and implications that there's something that needs to be met. And since Mephisto starts with the phrase "last chance", there seems to be a really slim chance of making that said wish come true. That could be what's been making kamiki take extreme measures, if he really has been.
あăȘăŸăźæ„›ăŒăŸă è¶łă‚‰ăȘい
æŹ ă‘ăŸă‚‚ăźăŻäœ•ă§ćŸ‹ă‚ăŸă‚‰ă„ă„ïŒŸ
Your love is still not enough, what can I use to fill what's missing?(fatale)
If life returns to you, if it reaches you, ah
I don't care what happens to me
Ah, but not every wish will be fulfilled
And if that’s not realized, I shall become you(mephisto)
Both Mephisto and Fatale seems to have lyrics that sound very desperate for love. The speaker of the songs really wants this one person they love back, to see them once more, to hear their voice and to look at them. This can apply to both Aqua and kamiki in terms of the feeling they have towards Ai, but Aqua's already had that from Ai and he doesn't need to be as desperate and craving about it, I think. It should be more about missing what he's once had with sorrow. However, this particular speaker in the songs makes it seem like love is the ONLY thing they want. They're willing to trade everything they have and even more to just get a chance to bring them back to them, which is quite extreme. The idea of their loved one loving them back doesn't come off as natural for them as Ai's love did for Aqua.
That's why I think these songs may have to do with kamiki. If this speculation really turns out to be true, then him and Ai could turn out to be like the couple from "The Gift of the Magi" from O'Henry. Ai could've left him because she wanted him to have a life of his own and have his happiness? but kamiki never understood that intent and aimed to throw away his life to trade for hers, giving up on his very happiness that ai tried to protect
it's like they tried to trade each other's life for the other and ended up with neither in the end. But I can be entirely wrong about all this. I feel this'd be interesting, if this is the case, kamiki may feel a lot of misery if what he's strived to do for Ai's sake made it impossible for him to fulfill her actual wishes. I'm sure Ai must've cared about this guy quite a bit, her relationship with kamiki seems like a mix of what aqua has with kana and akane. She would've wanted to support him like akane and bring him to the light like kana, but both of it didn't happen when she was alive. Aqua might be able to fulfill that wish of hers by telling Kamiki about how she really felt towards him.
The songs for this series are so interesting!! They may imply a lot of things we may not realize in first glance-even go as far as foreshadowing the plot. IDOL was and is like that, I'm sure the other songs do too. Listening to them may give us an idea of what is to unfold or what's been going on in some character's heads... for now, this is what I think that can be a possibility.
24 notes · View notes
elegyofthemoon · 1 year ago
Text
needed a moment to screech after cyberangel when i decided to go "huh! i wonder which battlesuit is this" only to read "herrscher of reason"
4 notes · View notes
hedge-rambles · 7 months ago
Text
I know this is a jokey post but I have Thoughts about this.
Basically, Nona speaks all languages because she understands meanings. And while names generally have some meaning behind them, they're not always accessible to native speakers. While other names, particularly in certain languages, may have a very literal meaning that any speaker would understand. And finally, when Nona speaks to people she tends to talk to them in their own languages.
So, for those of us reading the book in House (aka NZ English), "Kevin" will be rendered "Kevin", because though it means "homely birth" in the original Old Irish (CĂłemgen), it doesn't mean that in English. Even if she was to translate it in another language, it would still be Kevin in English/House.
Born-in-the-morning meanwhile probably has a name from another language, which still retains its full meaning. Traditional Luo naming conventions are often a very literal piece of information about the child's birth, e.g. Onyango/Anyango are names which mean the child was born in the morning. So she'd say "Onyango" if she was speaking Luo, but then turn to someone who speaks House and go "oh yeah, my friend Born-in-the-morning".
So if she had a friend who was a House speaker called Daisy, we'd get that as "Daisy" in the text. But she's probably say "PĂąquerette" or "Marguerite" to a French speaker.
i do love the theories about nona translating the names of her friends into their respective meanings (i.e. that "born in the morning" is not literally named born in the morning, that's just the etymological meaning of their name) but i also really really love the implication that if that's true then nona either (a) chooses specifically not to translate kevin's name or (b) the word "kevin" is, for one reason or another, entirely untranslatable
#tlt#nona the ninth#nona#Daisy could be translated because it still retains its original meaning of the flower in English#but Kevin's only meaning in English is ''the name Kevin''#I love the exchange with Cam about Honesty's name though where she asks ''is that what his people call him?''#and Nona is just like ''idk that's just how I hear it''#because the thing about Nona's translation skills is that in a way she *doesn't* speak multiple languages#she just knows how to convey meaning to people with the sounds they will understand#so she can say Honesty's name to him exactly as it should be said but she can't tell Cam what that is because speaking to Cam means House#there's also a time when she refers to Born-in-the-morning when talking to Hot Sauce who gets confused#and says ''do you mean *Born-in-the-morning*?''#because in the absence of BITM she's switched to saying the name in Hot Sauce's first language#hrmm actually that raises questions itself - she still hears Hot Sauce say it as ''Born-in-the-morning'' though#I guess Hot Sauce could know what the name means so Nona still hears it literally - BITM may well have told her at some point#I wonder how she'd hear the middle of Wake's full name...#would it depend on who was saying it to her?#e.g. an Edenite who doesn't speak any Māori vs. someone who at least (probably) knows the literal meaning like John#idk how much Māori Jod actually speaks but I'd assume he at least knows the lyrics and meanings of Aotearoa#would she hear one person say ''Kia hua ko te pai'' and another say ''let goodness flourish''?
297 notes · View notes
euthymiya · 1 month ago
Text
content includes: female reader, drunk reader + mentions of alcohol, modern + non curse au sukuna, established relationship, unnamed friends, reader makes one (1) dick sucking joke, reader dips fries into shakes because she’s elite like that, he carries reader
It’s half past midnight when he comes to pick you up. Your face sours as soon as you see him, taking an instinctive step back.
“Nuh uh,” you say, wagging a finger back and forth in his face as he scowls. “It’s girl’s night. No men allowed—we’ve been over this!”
“As if I wanna join your stupid girl’s night,” he scoffs. Sukuna is tired. (Of you). It’s too late at night to be worrying about what ditch you’re going to end yourself up in after lord knows how many drinks, so regrettably, he takes matters into his own hands.
It’s a good thing he does, too, he thinks with a flare of his nostril as he eyes the drunk, mess of a woman that’s supposed to be your ride home. Designated driver my ass, he all but grumbles under his breath.
“Hey—” he looks over to the side with an irritated flick of his eyes as a hand smacks his shoulder. Your friend (in not better condition than you) levels him with a snarky look before she hisses, “You heard her! It’s girl’s night. Go away.”
Sukuna ignores her—because, well, that’s what he always does anyway. She talks far too much to be considered a normal amount, and he doesn’t like the shrill sound of her voice. Instead, he turns to you, gives you a firm, scolding look before he grunts, “We are going home. Now.”
You seem to catch onto the stern tone of his voice because within seconds, you’re slumping against him as you whine, “Fine,” with a pout. “Mean.”
“Yeah?” He snorts, “You know what’s meaner? Nasty men who find girls passed out in the middle of the streets. Now let’s go. We’re going home—all of you.”
A chorus of whines and petty insults makes him want to grab a drink himself—being inebriated seems like the only way your friends are tolerable, but as annoying as they are, he refuses to leave them here wasted.
So he does the noble thing, and sacrifices his ear drums as they play whatever stupid pop song is trending on the radio at full volume down the streets, heads sticking out of the windows and screaming the lyrics out to innocent passerby’s.
Sukuna is just a guy. Not the best, most chivalrous or charitable guy, maybe—but just a guy, all the same. He’s not done anything wrong to deserve this torture. He’s been nothing but a kind (usually) boyfriend that loves you unconditionally (most of the time), supports you wholeheartedly (when it suits him), listens to your problems (if he’s in the mood), and makes you feel special (as long as it doesn’t inconvenience him).
Still, he’s stuck basically being an uber driver—for free, no less—to your ungrateful, bratty, obnoxious friends that aren’t pretty enough to enjoy your company in the first place. They don’t even thank him when they get out as he drops them off one by one to their homes, opting to say goodbye to you as if you’re the one who pays for the gas in his car.
Finally, the last of your friends (who he likes to consider nuisances) leaves, freeing him of anymore radio pop songs and unnaturally loud giggles.
He grumbles as you ask, “Can we get milkshakes?”
“No.”
“Please?” You whine, “I want strawberry.”
“That’s great,” he says sarcastically, “The answer’s still no.”
“Please, please, please, Kuna? I’ll suck your dick on the drive there—”
“Jesus, what’s the matter with you?” He hisses, fighting back flushed cheeks as he glares at you once the car rolls to a stop at a red light.
Usually, he’s the one making such lewd comments and getting under your skin—but lacking in sobriety is seriously forcing the two of you to switch roles. He’s starting to wonder if maybe he should be nicer to you—you deal with a lot. (Not that he’s mean. He considers himself a pretty generous boyfriend).
“I’ll even pay,” you offer.
“You didn’t bring a wallet, so it looks like I’ll have to pay,” he says blandly.
You grin, giving him an innocent smile as you excitedly ask, “So that’s a yes?”
“Are you going to be quiet if I say yes?” He clicks his teeth in thinly-veiled irritation.
You grin, nodding enthusiastically.
Well, he thinks bitterly, so much for no more pit stops.
It’s not long until he’s pulling into the drive-thru of the nearest fast food joint, rolling his window down to order your stupid, late night request.
“We’ll take one strawberry milkshake, please,” he says gruffly.
“Anything else?” Comes the tired reply of whoever is taking his order.
“No—”
“And large fries, please!” You lean over him to shout out the window and make sure the poor worker hears you. Sukuna glares, (gently) pushing you back into your seat as he hisses, “Put your seatbelt on! And you asked for a milkshake, not a damn meal.”
“Fries aren’t a meal,” you huff, “And they’re good dipped in the shake. You can’t have one without the other.”
“No—”
“I’ll scream that I’m being kidnapped,” you warn, “I want my fries.”
“Fucking fine,” he throws his hands up, exasperatedly caving to your request because, yeah, having some drunk, half-conscious woman in his front seat screaming bloody murder about being abducted at two a.m. is not a good look to a stranger that doesn’t know any better. “One strawberry milkshake and large fucking fries and that’s it,” he growls to the other person through the drive-thru speaker.
It’s not the poor employee’s fault, and he knows it, but he’s too tired and sleep-deprived to care about his snarky attitude.
“It’ll be ready at the window,” the man speaks tiredly, completely unphased.
“Yay!” You squeal.
It’s a pretty bothersome task to have to stop the car five minutes after receiving the food just to open the lid of your cup for you so that you can dip your fries into your milkshake easier, but he figures it’s better than a tiring drive home. Or worse, a spill all over his car seats at your own attempt.
He glances over at you wearily as he finally (hopefully) starts to drive home, watching as you dip your french fries into your frozen drink and happily eat away. He crinkles his eyes at the combination.
He’ll never understand people’s unnatural obsession with pairing anything remotely salty and sweet together.
“My friends think you’re weird,” you hum, taking a handful of fries to your mouth as you say between chewing, “They say you’re intense. Like, scary intense. But I told them, that’s just his face.”
Finally, a small smile cracks on his face, breaking through the grumpy, tired exterior. He snorts, shaking his head. “Drunk you has way too much to say.”
“Drunk me is honest,” you retort, clutching your fries to your chest as you huff, “Now I’m not sharing my fries anymore.”
“You weren’t going to anyway,” he rolls his eyes.
Finally, his car pulls into a familiar parking spot, just outside of your shared home as he parks and turns to you. You giggle at him before humming, “How’d you know?”
“Because you never do,” he rolls his eyes.
“That’s because this relationship is 50/50! You buy the food, and I eat it.”
“Yeah?” He snorts, shaking his head—still, there’s something endearing about the way you clutch your fries close to your chest, as if guarding them with your life. He leans over, snatching one easily anyway, smirking in amusement when you gasp and pout at the gesture.
“Hey! That’s mine!”
“Yeah, whatever,” he grunts, fighting back a fond grin before he asks, “Let’s go. We’re going in.”
With that, he comes around to your side of the car, pulling you out and hoisting you up to carry you bridal style as he marches over to the front door. Sighing happily, you admire his face as he walks.
“Thanks,” you murmur.
He raises a brow, mildly shocked. “For?”
“For bringing me home. Same time next week?”
He chuckles, pressing a soft, affectionate kiss to your forehead. “Absolutely not. No more girl’s nights with those shit shows.”
3K notes · View notes
bbydoll18xx · 8 months ago
Text
Keep the Edits Cordial
A tik tok edit of two best friends coaxes out admissions of feelings (and orgasms)
Paige Bueckers x reader
word count: 3.2k
themes: mutual pining (LOML), friends to lovers, smut!!
warnings: i like using the word ‘fuck’, 18+
Thanks for the love on my first post! This is my first attempt at writing smut, so bear with me. I have a few more ideas if y'all are interested!
Despite not being on the uconn’s women's basketball team, or having any shred of athletic ability, you had befriended Paige Bueckers, and her teammates, as an extension, had adopted you with open arms. So you weren't out of place sitting in the apartment of Paige and several of her teammates while she was in class.
“Oh fuck, shit, shit, shit,” you hear KK Arnold swear over on the couch across from where you were sitting, attempting to get some homework done.
A sensual R&B song plays from her phone several times, as her eyes nearly pop out of her head while she watches.
You look up, mildly annoyed at the noise, but you were used to KK’s antics and her overdramatics. 
“What the hell is the issue?” you ask.
“Umm
nothing,” she drawls. “Be right back, girly pop. Don’t move.” She runs into Azzi’s room, where Azzi and Caroline were attempting to also be productive. 
That was damn near impossible when KK was around.
Your interest peaks as you hear the same music play from KK’s phone again several times over and the giggles and gasps of the three girls fill the bedroom. 
“Paige is gonna flip if she sees this,” Azzi says matter-of-factly, as you strain to hear the full conversation.
‘What would make Paige flip?’ you wonder. 
“I gotta show this to Ice!” You hear KK exclaim a little too loudly, causing the other two girls to shush her. 
KK runs back into the main living space of the apartment where you were sitting. She picks up her stuff with a shit-eating grin before waving to you and rushing out the door.
She was so fucking weird.
Giving up on the essay you were supposed to be finishing, you toss your laptop down and head into the bedroom where Caroline and Azzi are heatedly whispering. They stop as soon as your footsteps near the door. 
Why were they acting so suspicious?
“Ladies, would you mind telling me what the actual fuck just happened?” you ask sarcastically. Being out of the loop was not fun.
“Oh you know, just KK being KK,” Azzi said, brushing it off. “Nothing that concerns you really.”
“But it concerns Paige?” you prod, trying to get any information out of her. Being around Azzi for years at this point, you had grown to learn her weak spots. 
Your eyes narrow, and you stare her down in a way you could only hope was somewhat threatening. 
“If it concerns Paige I wanna know. We’re best friends, c’mon please,” you whine. “Is it another one of those thirsty edits?” 
Azzi shakes her head and makes a zip of the lip motion. 
You roll your eyes at her childish behavior and look over to Caroline expectantly. She just shrugs. They were no help at all.
“Fine!” You say with a tone of indignation. “I'll find that stupid tik tok myself and see what all the fuss is about.” You spin on your heels and walk out of the room with sheer determination. You miss the smirk Azzi and Caroline share once your back is turned. 
You were so fucked.
You type ‘Paige Bueckers’ into the tik tok search bar and begin to scroll with the volume up to identify the same sound blasting out of KK’s phone just a minute ago. 
Your head gets a little fuzzy as your vision is assaulted with video upon video of Paige. You were used to calming the jump of your heart when you were around her, but the hedonistic edits made you want to scream. Each edit you came to had clips of her flexing, grinning, and sticking her tongue out in a way that made you want to rub your thighs together. They were paired with lascivious lyrics that caused you to nearly let out a whine. 
You had been avoiding tik tok recently for this exact reason. Trying to act normal around Paige all the time was difficult enough. You did not need a ridiculous app to fuel the fantasies that threatened to creep into your mind at every waking moment.
At least your screen time was way down.
Your scrolling quickly stopped as you felt your heart quite literally stop. It was you. In all its glory, with a staggering amount of likes, comments, and views, was what looked to be an edit of you and Paige.
What the fuck?
Your hands shaking, you clicked onto it, hearing the same song as earlier. This was the one the girls were freaking out about. 
“Azzi, Caroline, get your asses out here,” you yell, trying to conceal your panic.
They slowly strolled out of the room looking worried. 
“I see you found it,” Azzi said with a laugh. “So what do you think now that you’ve seen it?” 
Both girls tried to gauge your reaction, but you were more concerned about the fact that Azzi had said earlier that Paige would be pissed about it.
You shrug. You had to choose your words carefully. “Well there are edits of you and Paige together,” you reason. “Lots of people think you two are in some secret relationship, and P has never minded. Why would this be any different?” 
“Everyone knows that you and Paige have a special friendship,” Caroline alludes. It goes right over your head.
“Well if she is bothered by this then we are not as close as I thought,” you say quietly, still watching the tik tok, as it plays again. You wanted this edit burned into your retinas. 
Occasionally you allowed yourself to feel a tiny sliver of hope that you and Paige could ever be anything more than friends. Everytime she gave you a late night cuddle or placed a hand around your waist, as if it naturally belonged there, made you long for more. You knew better than to feel hopeful though. This stupid edit did nothing to quell the burning need for the tall blonde.
Throwing your phone down, you look up at the two basketball players with a look of indifference you’ve learned to master. “It doesn’t even matter,” you whisper dejectedly.
“C’mon, we all know how you actually feel about Paige. She’s the only one dense enough not to see how crazy you are for her,” Azzi soothes. “Maybe it's time to be honest with her. You never know what she’s feeling until you talk to her.”
You laugh. Fuck that. Feelings are meant to be kept inside until you die or they go away. 
You’re hoping the latter will come sooner rather than later, but you doubt you'll get that lucky.
“I don't think so,” you scoff. “I need to go before Paige gets back.” 
You leave despite the protests of the two girls, and you make a plan to hide from Paige for the next few days. You knew it was only a matter of time before Ice and KK went running to Paige to show her the edit. 
45 fucking minutes. That was how long it took before your door was being bombarded by Paige and her delightfully rambunctious children, Ice and KK. You swore under your breath as you quickly weighed your options. Option 1 was simple: pretend you were gone, although the smell of your microwave popcorn could have easily given you away. Option 2 was the grown up thing to do: open the door and have a conversation like an adult. Option 3 was straight up crazy: jump out of the window and run for the damn hills. You glanced at the open window of your bedroom before shaking your head. You needed to stop watching too much television. 
Option 1 was it. Fuck being an adult.
You stood next to the door, waiting for the three girls to give up, but they refused to leave.
“I know you’re in there, c’mon let me just talk to you,” said Paige through the door. “KK and Ice can leave.”
You hesitate, but still reach for the knob of the door. 
“Please?” Paige asks again, causing you to let out a sigh of defeat and turn the lock so she can come in. 
“Are you pissed?” Paige questions, somewhat harshly, as she walks through your door.
You give her a look of confusion. 
“Of course not!” you exclaim. “I thought you might be, though. I heard Azzi tell KK and Caroline earlier that you would flip if you saw it. I was just worried it would make you feel uncomfortable, and then our friendship would feel awkward, and I-” you ramble, trying to make some sense of what you were feeling.
Paige cuts you off with a wave of her hand. “You could never make me feel uncomfortable. I was worried it made you uncomfortable. I wanted to come check on you as soon as KK showed it to me,” she replied gently. “Me and Azzi, we’re used to the rumors, but I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about people thinking we’re, ya know, in love.” She whispers the last two words as if it was some big secret.
You let out a shaky laugh. “It means nothing to me. That would be ridiculous anyway,” you lie smoothly. Burying your feelings for Paige was an artform for you now. 
A quick shadow of something that was hard to read flickered over Paige’s face. You chose to ignore it. ‘It’s easier that way, less messy and complicated,’ you thought sadly. Little did you know, things would get even messier and more complicated. 
Two days later you were sitting in class when you hear the same fucking R&B song playing from your classmates phone. You look over at her, meeting her eyes. She smirks and slides closer to you. 
“So you and Paige Bueckers, huh?” she says curiously, almost like a taunt. “I’d imagine she’s incredible in bed.”
Her hypothesis startles you.
Who the fuck says that to someone they barely know? You feel your pulse rise in anger, wanting to defend your friend. You feel hot with jealousy. Anyone thinking about your Paigey in a sexual manner made your blood boil. In your mind, she was only yours.
You decided it would be fun to play into it. You lean closer to the gossipy bitch, and with a whisper you say, “you have no idea the things she does to me. Fuckk, I mean, we’ve all seen the edits. Her tongue is always out.” The obnoxious brunette to your left looks shocked, and she rolls her chair further away from you. 
With a satisfied smirk, you try to calm the pounding of your heart. ‘What the fuck did I just do,’ you thought. Rule number 1 of being Paige’s friend and only her friend was to avoid thinking of her in the way you really want to. That means no fantasizing, no tik tok edits, and absolutely no talking about having sex with her.
You lay your head onto the desk. What an idiot you were.
As the class comes to a close, you escape quickly to avoid any awkward looks from other people on campus. The last few days have left you feeling unsettled as the edit of you and Paige reached ridiculous levels of popularity. Everyone was now thinking you were somehow involved. You hated how much you wished that to be true.
You had promised Paige that you would hang out once you were finished with your class, trying to keep a semblance of normalcy to your friendship. You rolled into her apartment anxiously, calling out for her. Paige pokes her head out of her bedroom, waving you in with an equally anxious smile.
This worries you. Paige was always the grounded one of the pair of you. Her nervous demeanor makes you think something is wrong. You take a deep breath before sitting opposite her on her bed. It smelled like the lotion she always wears, and you subconsciously inhale a bit longer than normal.
Fuck she smells so good.
Paige stares at you for a few seconds, making you feel hot under her gaze. Those eyes piercing into your soul made you want to scream her name until the neighbors could hear. She takes a breath. “So basically everyone thinks we’re in love,” she deadpans. Her nonchalance makes you squirm. How the hell does she feel about being uconn’s newest gossip train? It's hard to tell.
“Yeah, I kind of figured when I was just asked in class about how you are in bed,” you mutter, blushing at the confession.
Paige looks vaguely surprised at first, before replacing the look with a smirk. “What’d you tell ‘em?” she questions.
With a sudden surge of confidence that you typically only get from ample amounts of alcohol, you reply, “I told her that all those edits of you with your tongue sticking out could only mean one thing.”
Paige grins cheekily. “You’re not wrong. I am great with my tongue. Maybe one day I can show you.”
You think your heart had never beat this fast in your entire fucking life. You were still feeling particularly bold, so you murmur, “I’m free now?” There was no way Paige was going to agree to that, so you get up to leave, before you feel her hand grab yours, pulling you back into her.
“Don’t fucking play with me right now,” Paige demands. “Do you actually want this? Do you want me?” 
You nod your head embarrassingly fast. You felt like an overexcited puppy. “P, I’ve wanted this since the first time I saw you.”
“Good,” the blonde replies. “Me too. Now let me show you all of my little tongue tricks.”
Paige grabs your jaw with one hand, placing the other around your throat to keep you right where she wanted you. Your lips meet finally, and everything around you fades into nothingness. 
Oh my God, she tastes so good. Paige presses hot, open-mouth kisses down your throat, sending shivers through your whole body and right down between your legs.
“Need you naked for me, babe,” hums Paige. ‘For her you would fight a war,’ you thought, as you stripped your sweatshirt off, revealing the pretty pink lace of your bralette.
You mentally high five yourself for your underwear choices this morning. Showing up in your granny panties would’ve been terrible.
Paige helps you out of your jeans and starts placing tantalizing kisses over your inner thighs and stomach. You can feel your arousal leaking out of you already, making you feel slick with the anticipation of what was to come.
Paige notices the wet spot on your panties, grinning as she lightly blows air over your clothed pussy. You arch your back wantonly, needing more-so much more. 
“Please, Paigey,” you whine in a way that gives Paige a big head. “Need you so bad.”
“Use your words, baby. What do you need?” she coaxes, still alternating between kissing your inner thighs and swirling her fingers against your clothed clit. 
“Please just touch me, I’ll do anything for you,” you moan brokenly. You could feel yourself start to slip into some sort of subspace. At this point, you’d do anything just to get some more stimulation.
“So polite, aren’t you, babe? I’m gonna take good care of you,” Paige promises before ripping your soaked panties off in one quick motion.
For the first time, you were splayed out naked in front of your best friend, with her having all the power in the world over you. Before you could begin to feel insecure under her piercing gaze, Paige swirled two long fingers into your sopping pussy, admiring how easily turned on you got for her. She brought them up to her mouth, sucking them in and moaning about how good you tasted. 
“You taste as sweet as I’ve been imagining for years,” she whispers. “Have a taste.” She brings the same two fingers up to your mouth and drags them across your swollen lips.
You lick your lips and groan at the taste of your own arousal, wiggling around on the bed and humping the air to get any sort of pleasure. Paige presses your hips flush against the mattress, keeping you from moving. She was yours to control as she wished. Finally, she brought her mouth down to your burning heat, starting with a long and slow lick up your pussy. It felt so good you could cry.
“More, P, need more,” you cry. She was being a fucking tease, and you could feel yourself go crazy as she ate you out slowly, as if she was eating her last meal on earth.
She granted you some reprieve as she entered a finger and then another into you, slowly stretching you out with scissoring motions. 
“So wet for me, aren’t you my pretty baby,” she gloats, and you try to avoid rolling your eyes back into your head in pleasure. Her fingers pick up a cruel and punishing pace, targeting your g-spot as if it had her name written on it.
She fucking owned you.
Paige, still finger fucking you, presses kisses up your belly, onto your tits, before meeting you in another searing kiss. You want to sob at the sheer pleasure. It was overwhelming; the heat of your best friend’s body pressed flush against you, the moans ricocheting off the walls, and the tightening in your lower belly that threatened to spill everywhere.
“Fuckkk, Paigey, I-i’m gonna cum,” you moan breathlessly. “Please, please let me cum, please I need you,” you whine in an incoherent babble of pleasure. 
“Cum for me, baby, I’ve got you,” Paige pants out, riding the highs of dominating you and ensuring the unceasing assault of your g-spot.
With a guttural moan and a string of words that would make a sailor blush, you ride out your high. Paige’s fingers slow as you pant, coming back to reality. She watches your chest rise and fall a few seconds before removing her fingers from your fucked out pussy and licking them clean.
“You did so good for me,” she praises, causing you to squirm, activating your praise kink once again.
“Thank you,” you whisper. “This isn’t going to make things weird now, is it?” you question anxiously. That was the last thing you wanted to happen.
“‘Course not,” promised Paige, linking her pinky finger with yours. “I’m plannin’ on wifing you up now.”
You giggle as the last bits of awkwardness fall away, feeling blissfully fucked out. “What about you, though?” you ask. You wanted to make Paige feel as good as she made you.
“We’ve got all the time in the world, baby,” she replies. “You look like you’re about five seconds away from fallin’ asleep.”
You smile sleepily at her. She knew you a little too well.
 “I should send a thank you card to whoever made that edit of us,” you murmured against Paige’s chest, making her laugh.
“And I'm definitely getting rid of all three of my vibrators,” you announce, causing Paige to grin proudly.
Paige was unquestionably okay with that.
1K notes · View notes
daisyblog · 5 months ago
Text
Watermelon Sugar
Tumblr media
Our Story Masterlist Summary: How Watermelon Sugar was made.
warning: smut, oral (female receiving), swearing
Very highly requested.
“So Styles
what are we working on today? Do you want to keep working on Treat People?”. Kid asked as he span around on his chair to face everyone, readjusting his hat as he did.
Harry gently licked his bottom lip as he thought about his options. “I’ve kinda got these lyrics that I can’t stop humming
I wanna work on them
see if they go anywhere, but if anyone feels uncomfortable then just say and we’ll scrap the whole thing!”.
“Shit it’s getting fucking deep in here today!”. Tyler joked, earning a snigger from Kid and a small grin from Mitch.
“What are you talking about man, every song is fucking deep”. Kid couldn’t bite his tongue. Harry only flipped him off with a sarcastic smile.
This is what Harry liked about the team, they could joke around, not taking anything to serious. But at the same time, they’d all shared many of the deepest conversations.
“Have you got like a melody or anything H?”. Mitch quietly asked as he prepared to play.
Harry shook his head as he pulled his lips into his mouth. “Nah just go with it and see what happens”.
“Tastes like strawberries
on a summer evenin'
and it sounds just like a song”. Harry acoustically sang, trying to find the right notes and melody.
“What’s with you and fruit, man?”. Mitch asked the question everyone was dying to know. “Plus what the fuck sounds like a song?”.
Harry ran his finger under his nose, a nervous habit he had. “Nothing
it’s nothing
just open for interpretation”.
---
Anne didn’t need an excuse to host a summer garden party, so the moment the sun came out she invited all her close family and friends over for food, drinks and a good time.
Harry and YN had been finding it difficult to leave each others sides, whether that was Harry’s arm reaching around her waist to sit on her hip, an arm over her shoulder or sharing a quick peck when they thought nobody was looking.
So when YN was in the kitchen, reaching across the spectacular spread Anne had put on to place a few strawberries on her plate, she felt two hands slide around her middle and a face nuzzle into her neck.
“I’ve missed you”. Harry placed small kisses up her neck, YN trying not to let her body respond as she took a bite of a strawberry, placing the green on the plate.
“I haven’t been anywhere”. YN giggled as she swallowed the fruit, placing the plate down so she could turn in his arms.
As she wrapped her arms around his neck, her fingers gently played with his loose curls. Harry met her lips with his, the sweet taste of strawberry lingered between them.
“Let’s go upstairs”. Harry mumbled against her lips, that were now a darker shade of red.
“Bubs we’re in your mums
there’s a party going on”. YN pointed out as Harry’s lips nibbled down her neck, teasing and distracting her from her thoughts.
Harry only shrugged his shoulders in response. “When has that ever stopped us?”. YN knew he had a point, but she was still reluctant, glancing around to see if anyone would see them wonder off. “Please baby”.
“But I want more berries”. YN wined as she glanced back at her plate, sitting there full of fresh strawberries.
“Well I want you!”. Harry gently pulled her by the neck to place a lingering kiss to her swollen red lips.
---
”All I’m getting so far is you’ve eaten strawberries on a summer evening and it sounds like a song!”. Mitch was literal with his interpretation, looking at Harry like he’d gone crazy.
“Mitch just listen to the fucking lyrics man
we’re only like three lines in and I already know what it’s about.” Tyler laughed at how naive his friend was being right now.
Whilst Kid and Tyler fiddled about with some ideas for mixing and editing ‘Golden’, Mitch tested out a few chords to see what would fit with the current song Harry was writing.
Harry was noticing some lyrics down in his leather book, when Mitch played a particular melody that caught his ears. He listened carefully trying to find the right timing.
“I want more berries
And that summer feelin'
It's so wonderful and warm”. Harry sung, catching the other’s attention, all invested in where he was going with it. “Breathe me in
Breathe me out
i don't know if I could ever go without..”.
Harry paused as he processed where this song was going. But glancing around the room, he spotted a book on the table. Giggling to himself, he couldn’t stop his hands from reaching for it. “I don't know if I could ever go without
Watermelon sugar
High!”.
“Sounds like you’ve just named your next song”.
---
Once their hidden by the four walls in Harryïżœïżœïżœs room, he quickly reaches for YN’s waist, leaving traces of his fingers behind. Pulling her closer to him as their lips become ones and their fronts meet.
The warmth from their bodies being so close has caused them both to feel hot. Their movements feel quick and fast, but slow and soft all at the same time.
As Harry walks them blindly over to the bed, YN’s hands become greedy and pulls his T-shirt off and leaves it drop to the floor. Taking YN’s route, Harry’s ring clad fingers, find their way to the front of YN’s skirt unbuttoning it as their lips stay together like magnets.
Once her skirt and underwear are pooled on the floor, keeping Harry’s tahirt company, YN finds herself lying with her back on the duvet covered bed. Instead of joining her, YN feels his lips attach themselves to her inner thigh. Her mind becomes dizzy as she feels his wet lips trailing further up.
“Harry!”. Her lips moan, wanting to feel more as her lower stomach began to tighter already. His lips are now needier, moving higher and closer. In a quick movement, Harry grabs a pillow from the bed and places it under her hips.
Leaning forward Harry’s tongue meets her, licking up and down with a slow teasing start. His hands move her thighs so her bare legs are resting over his shoulders. Another moan leaves YN’s lips as she feels his mouth move against her.
“Oh, fook!”.
Her moaning only encourages his movements, as well as feeds his ego. Whilst his tongue teases her, swirling around as he tastes the wetness as it drips down his chin, he moves his left hand to rest on her lower stomach, pushing down gently.
“Fookin’ ‘ell, that’s good!”.
Harry could feel YN’s hips start to buck against him, so he gently held her hips down so the sensations hit harder. The sound of her heavy pants outplayed the sound of Harry’s tongue hitting the wetness between her legs.
Knowing YN was close as she muttered out small encouragements, Harry moved his tongue faster against her, lapping up the sweet taste. The addicted sensation began to build and the heat travelled down YN’s body. Her head swung back on the sheet behind her as the pressure built.
It hit her with force, causing her to feel light headed and unable to think of anything but the climax, when her thighs clenched around his head, Harry had no choice than to keep up his movements as he rode her through her high.
“Oh Harry, oh yes!”.
The sound was like heaven to Harry’s ears as he felt her vibrate against him. Watching her orgasm was still something he could never get bored of.
The energy had been wiped away from YN as she now laid still on the bed, unable to move due to the shakiness. Harry lifted himself up from his position between her legs, wiping away the wetness left behind on his chin.
Harry moved further up the bed with his knees, hoovering over YN’s tired body. He leaned forward pressing a quick kiss to her lips.
“Worth missing out on eating your strawberries?”. Harry sarcastically asked, as he held himself up with his arms.
---
As they continued to work on the song, now known as ‘Watermelon Sugar’, the penny dropped for Mitch as Harry sang, trying to perfect the melody and pre-chorus.
“Tastes like strawberries on a summer evenin'
And it sounds just like a song
I want your belly and that summer feelin'
I don't know if I could ever go withoutïżœïżœ.
Mitch’s eyes went wide at the realisation. “Shit
fucking hell man
you’re singing about eating-”.
Before Mitch could finish his sentence, Harry cut him short. A large cheeky smirk covering his face as he did so.
“It’s a song about wanting to eat strawberries!”.
Tag List:
@pansexualwitchwhoneedstherapy @harrys-flower @platinumbarbie143 @frickin-bats@harrysbbyh0ney @chronicallybubbly @goldensunflowe-r  @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite@kaverichauhan @peterholland04 @panicattheuc @or-was-it-just-a-dream @hittiesontour@bunnyharold @fanfictioncafe @lilfreakjez @iamahallucinationnn @theekyliepage @indierockgirrl@buckybarnessimpp @ashleighsss @jerseygirlinca @fake-coolbeans @itsmytimetoodream@treehouse-mouse @mrs-anna-styles211994 @macy-tpwk
849 notes · View notes
starmocha · 5 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
pain is all you'll find [Sylus/Reader ★ 630 words ★ Masterlist ★ Series Index ★ AO3] It was karaoke night at Onychinus’ base. A/N: I am so, so sorry. I have no excuses for this one. It’s just full-on crack.
It was karaoke night at Onychinus’ base.
You didn’t even realize Onychinus had karaoke nights, but here you were in a room surrounded by other henchmen all applauding and cheering its fearless leader as he wailed—er, sang—the fourth song of the night.
You grimaced, and chugged your bottle of beer, wishing the alcohol would just take effect already. Beside you, Luke and Kieran were also happily (and soberly?) applauding Sylus. They couldn’t possibly be enjoying his cat-yowling rendition of Careless Whisper, could they? It was honestly hard to tell since the twins refused to remove their masks. The masks were probably there to hide their suffering, you thought grimly, unable to think of any other plausible reasoning in your semi-tipsy state.
When you turned your sight back to the TV screen and the current talentless singer hogging the mic, your cheeks pinked up when you made eye contact with Sylus and he winked at you. For just an instance, you felt your stomach flipped, captivated by his smoldering eyes and suave smile.
And then he opened his mouth again. You mentally screamed in agony, wondering why a good person like yourself was being punished so cruelly like this.
You wanted to bury your head in your arms, or maybe suffocate yourself with these tacky looking throw pillows at Onychinus’ base. Hell, you would even happily let Mephisto peck your eyes out if it meant ending this torment. How could someone with a great—no, sexy—speaking voice not be able to carry a goddamned tune? God truly had a very particular sense of humor, you realized, as you forced a stiff smile and shakily gave Sylus a thumb up.
When the song finally ended (dear god, why did he pick the extended version?), you finally let out the breath you were holding in. You politely clapped and smiled, thinking Sylus was about to return to his seat next to you, but you instantly froze mid-clap, face paling as you watched him scrolled through the song list once more.
He smiled. You worried.
Your ears bled as he rasped the first three verses, before belting out: “Hello, is it me you're looking for?”
Onychinus henchmen were clapping and cheering, and you couldn’t take this anymore. You leaned over to both Luke and Kieran, hissing sharply, “You guys can’t possibly be enjoying these murders on classic songs, right?”
You blinked, dumbfounded, when Luke casually pulled out an earplug.
“Did you say something, Miss Hunter?”
Kieran pulled both of his own earplugs out. “What’s wrong?”
“You guys have been
”
“Oh, damn,” Luke said, reaching into his pocket, “I forgot to give you yours. My bad, Miss Hunter.”
You curiously received a pair of earplugs and you looked up, seeing Kieran motioning you to put them on. The moment you did, you realized that silence truly was golden. You cracked a grin to the twins.
Suddenly you found you were enjoying Sylus’ performance more. All eye candy and not a fucking tuneless sound out of him. Thank fucking god, you thought, this time joining Luke and Kieran in their zealous cheering.
Everything went on well for a few minutes, but unfortunately, the night seemed to drag on, and everyone watched with dismay as the leader of Onychinus showed that he had no intention of letting anyone else have the mic. Your brief moment of faux enthusiasm died down after each song he performed until you could do nothing but mentally sighed as you clapped like a trained seal with your stupidly rigid smile plastered on your face.
You watched the lyrics danced on the TV screen as Sylus ‘sang’ along: Welcome to your life.
You mentally groaned for the umpteenth time. It was going to be a long, long fucking night. Goddamnit.
450 notes · View notes
daisymbin · 4 days ago
Note
Ok so this might be very suggestive but imagine getting on the bus with hansol after a casual coffee date and the bus is crowded so you're standing in the standing area and he's standing facing u, kinda Like shielding u frm the crowd or smth & u r sharing earpods (đŸŽ”: double take ~ dhruv) & he's staring out of the window & you're staring at him and you randomly say 15. "you’re my favorite person, you know that?" Cuz u just realise u might still hv a crush on ur long term boyfriend
(This is my 5th ask pls bear with me i just love u too much)
Also I can get this look of his out of my mind
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
!!!! thank you for coming back!!!! i chose another song as requested!!! đŸ„ČđŸ€
full prompt list!
check out my masterlist! // hansol's m.list
the bus was packed, the kind of crowded where personal space became a luxury, and you found yourself standing shoulder to shoulder with strangers. it wasn’t unusual, but today it felt different. maybe it was the warmth of the coffee date still lingering between you and hansol, or maybe it was the way he looked so effortlessly himself, casual and calm, as if the chaos of the world couldn’t touch him.
he stood beside you, one hand gripping the railing above while the other tugged at his earphones. he handed you one without a word, the gesture so familiar it made your heart ache in the best way.
“thanks,” you mumbled, slipping the earbud in.
“you don’t even know what song it is yet,” he teased, his lips twitching into a small smile.
“doesn’t matter. your playlists are always good.”
the faint intro of be your everything by boys like girls filled your ears. you bit back a smile at the song choice, wondering if he’d put it on for you or if it was just a coincidence. hansol didn’t say anything else, just turned to look out the window, his profile bathed in the soft, golden light of late afternoon.
you shifted slightly as the bus jolted forward, trying to steady yourself against the sway of the vehicle. the standing area was cramped, people pressed too close for comfort. and then it happened—a sharp stop at a red light sent someone stumbling into you, their shoulder colliding with yours.
you stumbled forward, a soft gasp escaping your lips as you tried to regain your balance. hansol’s arm shot out instinctively, his hand catching your elbow and steadying you before you could fall.
“you okay?” he asked, his voice low, filled with concern.
“yeah,” you breathed, your heart pounding for reasons that had nothing to do with the near fall.
he frowned slightly, his hand lingering on your arm for a moment longer before he shifted, stepping in front of you. “here, stand like this,” he said, positioning himself between you and the crowd. his arm stretched out to hold the railing above your head, shielding you from the jostling around you.
you blinked up at him, surprised by the sudden closeness. “hansol, you don’t have to—”
“just in case,” he interrupted, his gaze flickering to yours briefly before returning to the window. “i don’t want you getting bumped into again.”
the way he said it, so matter-of-fact and protective, made your chest tighten.
the song played on, and you found yourself more focused on him than the music. his eyes were distant, watching the buildings pass by, his expression soft and almost thoughtful. you’d known him for so long, but moments like this still caught you off guard—the quiet way he cared, the little things he did without needing to be asked.
as the chorus swelled, you caught a lyric that made your breath hitch: “i’ll be your shelter, i’ll be your storm. i’ll make you shiver, i’ll keep you warm.”
something about those words hit you differently. they reminded you of everything hansol had been to you, everything he still was. he wasn’t just your boyfriend—he was your safe place, your calm in the chaos. and in that moment, staring at him as the music played on, you realized something.
you still had a crush on him. after all this time, after all the little moments and big ones, after he’d already become yours, the feeling hadn’t faded. it had only grown, deeper and stronger, filling every corner of your heart.
the words were out before you could think. “you’re my favorite person, you know that?”
hansol froze, his eyes flicking to yours, wide and disbelieving. “what?”
you felt the heat rise to your cheeks, but there was no taking it back now. “i said you’re my favorite person.”
his lips parted slightly, and for a moment, he just stared at you. then, slowly, a shy smile spread across his face, the kind that made your heart do flips. “me?”
you rolled your eyes, trying to play it off despite the fluttering in your chest. “obviously.”
he blinked a few times, his cheeks flushing a soft pink as he turned back to the window, suddenly unable to meet your gaze. “oh.”
you laughed softly at his reaction. “that’s all you have to say? ‘oh’?”
he rubbed the back of his neck, a sheepish grin tugging at his lips. “you caught me off guard. i don’t really know what to say.”
“you don’t have to say anything,” you said, your voice quieter now, more sincere. “i just
 wanted you to know.”
hansol finally looked at you, his eyes warm and filled with something you couldn’t quite name. “well, for the record,” he said softly, “you’re my favorite person too.”
the bus jolted again, but this time, you barely noticed. your hand brushed against his where it rested on the railing, and instead of pulling away, he let his pinky hook around yours, the small gesture sending a wave of warmth through you.
and as hansol glanced at you again, his lips twitching into a smile that was just for you, you knew one thing for sure—you’d never stop having a crush on him. not now, not ever.
the song faded into the next, but neither of you moved to change it. the bus ride continued, but the world outside felt like it had fallen away, leaving just the two of you in this small, crowded space.
190 notes · View notes
snapscube · 2 months ago
Note
hi Penny ! i was wondering if you ever finished that song you sang in one of the sonic unleashed ps2 videos, it scratches my brain so nice and I just keep rewatching it so i was curious if that ever released in any capacity. also your singing is so so so so nice c:
ok it may not be exactly what ur looking for but im gonna help u out so
we are actually coming up on about 5 years since i first wrote that little snippet. as for whether id ever make a full completed version, i can’t say for sure. ideally yeah sure id like to but. doesn’t mean it’ll happen.
HOWEVER
please do urself a favor and stop listening to the rough version from the let’s play video and take this link to a more “official” demo/draft recording i made back when i was first writing it
i hope this will suffice for now 🙏 feel free to rip the audio or whatever if u wanna put it on ur Devices
258 notes · View notes
alllgator-blood · 9 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I s2g if you add the layers of these comic pages together, it's over 350 layers. THIS is why I don't do full color for my comics lmaooo- ANYWAY EVERYONE HERE HAS AN AU APPARENTLY, SO THIS IS A BRIEF GLIMPSE INTO MINE. I don't know what to call it yet but I'm thinking of calling it "famous prophets" because 1. I like that car seat headrest song, 2. it's about shamura who is prophetic, 3. it's about trying to outrun fate with the Power of Love (and failing. Like the song!!!). It takes place when all the bishops were teens/kids during the age of hundreds of gods at war, and were trying to survive as a family.
I'm really excited to work on stuff for it but it's all gonna be drawn out of order. Maybe I'll write a full explanation of what it's gonna be about when I have a better idea...I want to channel my eldest sibling angst in a productive way, and maybe establish a QPP between shamura and a completely random npc everyone forgets about <3 also kallamar is trans too cause I said so. I'll do a comic about it eventually. Instead of an absence of gender he has TOO much gender. It simply cannot be contained.
I like that nonbinary genders are normalized in cult of the lamb to the point where nobody singles anyone out for being a they/them, it's not like "THIS IS MY SIBLING SHAMURA. THEY ARE NONBINARY AND USE THEY/THEM. ALRIGHT BACK TO KILLING YOU", it's just like "don't you fucking dare make my poor sibling wake up from their nap to kick your ass. Cause they deserve better than this."
But at the same time I like having the freedom to be more specific, and say "shamura is voidpunk and their gender is best described as the feeling that overtakes you during the first snow of the year, when everything outside is deathly quiet". This comic is actually derived from the time I was walking through a forest that's been torn down for a few years, and came out to my little sister as trans. I must've been like 13 or 14 and she didn't really get it as a 10 year old, but it was better than my mom FREAKING OUT about me coming out. So it was a nice little bonding moment between just the two of us. I don't have a good memory so I don't recall how it went unfortunately...
Now, the climate is a little different. My sis tried out transmasculinity for maybe 5-6 years before feeling happier as a woman, my mom is trying to be Based and flaunt her Woke trans children, and my dad remembered "oh yeah trans natives have existed before colonization. Maybe me being transphobic is a product of my culture being erased" and has gotten better about calling me the right thing. I have a mustache (thanks pcos!!) and wear skirts and am not a repressed "tomboy" teenager anymore. But I can't help but wonder what would've happened if I could've been like shamura and just...been nonbinary without people being fucking weird about it. Or been born as a badass war god who will tear you to shreds before you can perceive my birth sex. I know they're fictional but they are my ultimate gender envy GRRRRR BARK BARK BARK
Here is the secret image for this post- I listen to mostly EDM when I draw cause it keeps the energy up, but as I was finishing up shamura's poetry part, I was like THESE ARE JUST KMFDM LYRICS so I made this
Tumblr media
740 notes · View notes
the-kr8tor · 3 months ago
Note
okok listen..
yk how some fica about hobie is like him tapping on the window, you let him in and he’s hurt and you fix him up? what about the other way round 😼
ikik I’m so smart 😘
So cute! Thank you for requesting, hope you like it ❀❀
Pairing: Hobie Brown x fem! Reader/ Spider-Punk x fem! Reader
Word count: 1.1k
Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw injury, cw violence mention, spider-woman! Reader, FLUFF
ʕ⁠·⁠ᎄ⁠·⁠ʔ
Hobie sits on his patchwork couch, he strums his guitar softly, a rare tune escaping from the scruffed but well loved instrument. His steaming cup of tea sits next to his notebook where his numerous cluttered thoughts are scribbled about. Some are doodles, a few are coherent enough to become lyrics for his new song.
“Fuckin’ hell,” he says under his breath, crossing out a word that does not fit well with the song. Notebook abandoned, he sticks his pen on the shell of his ear to strum the strings again.
The houseboat suddenly jostles, soft enough not to spill his drink, but hard enough to knock his pen off his ear. Hobie, knowing full well what— or who the cause of the shake was, closes his notebook immediately before he could see your masked face peek out of the circular window like a gopher.
You knock then wave to him excitedly. He feigns annoyance through narrowed eyes, which made you pout under your mask. He can't see it, but he knows you're giving your signature vigilante pout and puppy dog eyes that he can't resist.
Without a second more, he stands up, socked feet creating friction on the carpet. Opening the window for you, you lean on the sill, elbows propped up on the chipping paint.
“Whatcha doin'?” You ask, voice muffled by the mask. He faces the whites of your mask, flicking where your nose should be. “Ow, grumpy.”
“What am I doin'? I should be askin' you that. You do know I gave you a key for a reason, right, love?” His eyebrow raises questioningly, piercing shining in the moonlight. “It's almost midnight, get your arse in ‘ere.”
You shrug with a chuckle. “I got held up by Goblin.”
“I swear if I ever see that wanker flyin’ ‘round—”
“—You'd throw a molotov at him!” You finish for him. “I know, my love.” Patting his cheek, you climb into the houseboat like usual, groaning and wincing when your skin pulls at your injury.”
“You hurt?” He helps you up on your feet, hands holding your arm, worry etched on his handsome face. “Love?” He asks again when you don't answer, his hands reach up to the hem of your mask, not pulling, waiting for your permission.
“Just a tiny bit.” Your pained wince under your tone says otherwise.
“Can I see?” Hobie asks, thumb brushing along your clavicle. With a nod from you, he gently tugs at your mask, effectively pulling it off without aggravating any injuries you might have on your face. “That doesn't look like a tiny bit, love.”
He sighs, eyes roaming along the tiny cuts along your face. But his main concern is the large gash along your jaw that runs up to the side of your nose. It's an angry wound that still bares goblin's unmistakable mark from his claw. Your mask in his hand feels pristine despite the injury, he wonders if you changed it before you got to his place so he wouldn't worry too much.
“I know, ugly, right?” You give him a weak smile when his silence cuts through you. “I–I just wanted to stop by so you don't worry when the radio broadcasts the fight in the morning.” Cupping his cheek, you reach up to flatten the folds from his knitted brows. “You'll get old really quick if you keep doing that.”
“Not ugly.” He shakes his head, hands falling down to your shoulders to rub soothingly. “Still bloody fit.” You give him a gentle smile. “Sit down, let me take care of you, yeah?”
You inhale sharply, you'd be lying if you tell him that you're all fine and dandy after getting pummeled on the ground. “I can just go home, I really just wanted you to see me now so you don't have to worry about me tomorrow.”
“Well, I can worry now, or tomorrow. I choose now, love.” His eyes soften under the moonlight, and you can't help but surrender and embrace him fully. He hugs back, arms wrapped around your middle protectively, knuckles tracing your spine. “Anythin’ else I have to worry ‘bout?”
“Nothing else, I'm just due for some cuddling.” You say as you peck the underside of his jaw lovingly.
“Doctor's orders, I bet?” He whispers, eyes closing, face hidden in your hair whilst avoiding your scratches.
“Yeah, I have a prescription and everything.”
Hobie chuckles, patting your behind to make you place your feet on top of his. Once you get the message, he waddles towards the couch with you still in his arms. You help by giggling into his skin, lips meeting his warm cheek.
He sits you down gently, “I'll get the kit, stay.”
“Yes, sir!” You mock a salute, making him chuckle.
“Far from it, love.” He leaves, but not without you smacking him behind the second he turns around. Looking over his shoulder, he smirks. “You're playin’ a dangerous game.”
You tilt your head, lips curling into a playful smile. “I know exactly what I'm doing, Hobs.”
With a roll of his eyes, and a quip on the tip of his tongue, he walks towards the bathroom to retrieve the first aid kit. All with a grin on his lips, and stomach doing flips.
You've almost fallen asleep on the couch when he finally comes back. The cold sting of the antiseptic hits your cheek as he dabs it with a cotton ball. “Ouch.” You can't seem to look away from his eyes when he sits this close to you.
“Almost there, I'll make this quick.” He says while he lets you wrinkle his shirt in your grip.
“Why is it every time I see you I get lost in your eyes?”
“You see me everyday. You tellin’ me you get lost every time I look at you?” His movements pauses, eyes twinkling under the lamp. “How do you get anythin’ done?”
“Oh,I try.” You wink, but your wound prevents you from winking fully, making you look like you're spasming.
“Alright, you bloody flirt.” Chuckling, he places his thumb over your eyelid to make the skin relax. “Did you get him?”
“Mm-hmm, I got him by electrocuting his ass.” You lean into his touch as he continues to tend to your wounds.
“That's my girl.” He nudges your nose with his own, and then gives you a quick kiss on your lips. You chase his lips when leans away, pouting again. “All done. You didn't need any stitches.” He rubs your thighs affectionately, smiling sweetly at you. “Stay the night?” He knows you'll eventually heal before lunch tomorrow, but he'd still tend to you no matter how many times you tell him about your abilities. He'd do it every time you come to him.
“Absolutely.” You close the distance, breath fanning across his lips as you kiss once, twice, before moving away. He sighs, smiling in content. “If you tell me what you're working on.” Glancing towards his notebook, you give him a sly smirk.
“Cheeky.” He grabs the notebook before you could. “No.”
“Aw, come on, Hobie! Just a peek!”
Tumblr media
217 notes · View notes
inthedayswhenlandswerefew · 4 months ago
Text
Where Will All The Martyrs Go [Chapter 13: The Regrets Are Useless] [Series Finale]
Tumblr media
A/N: Below are your final predictions. Let's see how you did... đŸ„°
Tumblr media
Series summary: In the midst of the zombie apocalypse, both you and Aemond (and your respective travel companions) find yourselves headed for the West Coast. It’s the 2024 version of the Oregon Trail, but with less dysentery and more undead antagonists. Watch out for snakes! 😉🐍
Series warnings: Language, sexual content (18+ readers only), violence, bodily injury, med school Aemond, character deaths, nature, drinking, smoking, drugs, Adventures With Aegonâ„ąïž, pregnancy and childbirth, the U.S. Navy, road trip vibes.
Series title is a lyric from: “Letterbomb” by Green Day.
Chapter title is a lyric from: “Whatsername” by Green Day.
Word count: 6.1k
💜 All my writing can be found HERE! 💜
Rain pours outside the cabin, mist-shrouded pine trees and still dark water, a place in southern Oregon called Lake of the Woods. The twin-sized bed with a thin foam mattress was once used by kids attending summer camp, capture the flag and s’mores, hikes and scary stories, but now the children are ghosts and the monsters are real, stumbling down streets and lurking in dark places, licking blood from what’s left of their lips.
Aemond is here but he’s also not, a castaway on an island where the world never ended, his hands in your hair as you straddle him, your hips moving tentatively, his lips and teeth at your throat, the sharp points of his canines like fangs.
“Am I doing this right?” you murmur doubtfully. “I feel like I’m definitely not doing this right
”
“Shh, you’re great, you’re incredible.”
“I’m sorry I don’t know how to do everything already, I’m sorry you have to teach me—”
“Stop,” Aemond commands, a sharp sigh through your hair. “I love this. I love you. I want to teach you things until the day I die.”
The nervous tension in your muscles unravels—peddles thrown into water, campfire smoke vanishing into indigo night—and now his hands are on your hips, steadying you, guiding you. You link your fingers around the back of his neck and try to find a cadence that isn’t uncomfortable, ungainly, effortful. You wanted to try this. You want to experience everything with him.
“Take your time,” Aemond is saying like it’s difficult for him to keep a train of thought, his eye closed, his cheeks flushed, blood-colored blooms like a dusk sky. “I’m fine down here, don’t worry about me
”
Rain drums against the windows; lightning flashes in the sky and thunder growls. From the front porch of one of the other cabins, you can hear the indistinct droning of conversations and Aegon strumming the acoustic guitar he brought from the beach house. It’s something you’ve overheard him singing before, one of his strange midcentury darlings, a song that should be too old for him to know the words to.
“All you big and burly men who roll the trucks along
Better listen, you’ll be thankful when you hear my song
You have really got it made if you’re haulin’ goods
Any place on earth but those Haynesville Woods
”
Your skin gleams with a cool sheen of sweat; there is a draft through the cabin walls that makes you shiver as you cling to Aemond. You roll your hips a certain way and he moans—suddenly, involuntarily—and you know you’ve found the right rhythm.
“It’s a stretch of road up north in Maine
That’s never ever ever seen a smile
If they’d buried all them truckers lost in them woods
There’d be a tombstone every mile
Count ‘em off, there’d be a tombstone every mile
”
Aemond is kissing you deeply, desperately, trembling hands and gasping shallow breaths. And there is not just euphoria written into the lines of his face; there is disorientation, there is wonder. He barely manages: “Alright
um
if you want me to last longer than about thirty more seconds, you should probably slow down
”
“No,” you tease, grinning as you bite at his full lips.
“When you’re loaded with potatoes and you’re headed down
You’ve got to drive the woods to get to Boston town
When it’s winter up in Maine, better check it over twice
That Haynesville road is just a ribbon of ice
”
Aemond cries out, louder than you’ve ever heard him before—you’ve never had privacy, you’ve never truly been alone—and then again, a helpless ecstatic sound, pleasure so overwhelming it almost starts to feel like pain.
“Quiet!” you whisper, giggling, touching two fingers to his mouth. “Everyone’s going to hear you.”
“Oh my God,” Aemond says. He falls back onto the mattress and brings you with him, his arms wrapped around you, kissing your cheeks and your forehead as the two of you lie there panting and entangled, his blue eye astonished. “Okay, okay, I need a minute. I think I just burst an aneurysm.”
“I killed you?” you purr with feigned distress, basking in your conquest.
“You can kill me whenever you want. You can kill me five times a day.”
“When you’re talking to a trucker that’s been haulin’ goods
Down that stretch of road in Maine they call the Haynesville Woods
He’ll tell you that dying and going down below
Won’t be half as bad as driving on that road of ice and snow
”
Aemond stares up at the ceiling—a steep gable roof, a motionless fan—and now you can tell he’s thinking about his family again, discorporate screams, misplaced trust. Otto Hightower’s bones were found in the shower, meaning he likely died before or not long after their power failed and water would have run out in the municipal system. They were probably killed before you and Aemond ever met, distant galaxies lightyears away, remote long-dead stars. And so all the blood you paid to get to California was wasted.
“Do you ever think about the people you have saved?” you ask gently as your fingertips trace the ridge of his scar. “You stitched yourself back together. You healed Aegon’s burns. You sutured Cregan’s arm. You got me and Rio down from that transmission tower.”
“I guess I did,” Aemond says, but his voice is ambivalent, as if none of these things count. He has not found someplace safe for you yet. His job is not finished; his triumphs may only be temporary.
“Aemond
back in Pennsylvania
why did you decide to help us?”
“Luke spotted you guys, and we all talked it over. If it had just been Rio, honestly, I wouldn’t have taken the chance. A man his size, and possibly armed
could be trouble, you know? But I figured since he was traveling with a woman and you seemed to be with him by choice, he was probably okay. And then when we first met, he was so protective of you
didn’t want me touching you, didn’t leave you alone
I realized he had to be a good guy.”
“He was,” you say solemnly. I was supposed to remind him about the racks. I was supposed to warn him. But you didn’t warn Rio about what was waiting to kill him in that sand-swept grocery store in Winnemucca, just like you didn’t warn Jace about radiation or Baela about the way the rungs of the ladder that ran up the side of the grain bin were rusted and creaking, and maybe there is more than enough blame to go around.
“And then after Battle Mountain, as soon as we found the gasoline and ammo, I knew we had to go back for you. It hit me all at once. I couldn’t protect you by leaving you with Rio and Cregan. And I couldn’t let you go. I’ve never had something like this before. I didn’t know it existed. I told the others we were turning around, and Aegon said: Thank fucking God. Rhaena took off sprinting towards the car.” Then Aemond kisses you again, but tenderly this time, slowly, like you’ll have forever and there’s no need to rush. “I’m going to get you to Odessa. I’m going to take you somewhere safe.”
The rain is stopping; there are still a few hours of daylight left.
~~~~~~~~~~
“Hey, Chip Skylark. Check it out,” Aegon says, grinning at you from where he’s sprawled on the wet dock and smoking a cigarette, wearing his neon green plastic sunglasses, his left leg finally freed from its bandages and on full display. You’re all wearing the same things, stolen t-shirts and shorts, sweatshirts at night when it gets cold, sneakers you can walk hundreds of miles in; but Aegon won’t give up his Sperry Bahamas. “It’s nature’s tattoo.”
You sit down beside him and admire the scar tissue, red knots and white cords, jagged terrain like a mountain range, organic highways and bridges and trails. “It’s a roadmap.”
“That’s appropriate.”
You’ve been traveling on foot for two weeks since Criston’s white Tahoe ran out of gas and was abandoned in the town of Mad River, California. Now you are only about ten miles from Odessa, close enough to reach in half a day but too far to get into town before nightfall. This time tomorrow you’ll be there, and it will either be a haven or a wasteland, and if Rio’s parents’ community in Odessa has disappeared then so has your last idea for where to go. Absentmindedly, you skate your fingerprints over the bumps and grooves of Aegon’s leg like a blind man reading braille. He shifts and clears his throat; you’ve made him uncomfortable somehow. You lift your hand away.
“I’m sorry, does that hurt?”
“Nah. I can’t really feel anything besides pressure. The nerve endings got fried.”
“Oh.” But now you don’t know what you did to upset him. Aegon doesn’t provide an explanation. Down the dock a ways towards the shore, Rhaena is reading The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes and listening to the pink Sony Walkman formerly owned by a little girl named Ava. Inside whirls Green Day’s 2004 album American Idiot, which Aegon took from his bedroom at the beach house to add to his CD collection, a cultural archive, a gift for posterity. Cregan is teaching Daeron to fish with poles he found in one of the cabins; Helaena is bringing them worms. Aemond and Luke are gathering things dry enough to burn—books and wooden chairs from inside the cabins—and piling them up so Cregan can cook dinner once it’s caught.
“So,” Aegon says, changing the subject, scrutinizing you as he puffs on a Marlboro Gold. “Everything going okay?”
You know what he means; he must have heard Aemond earlier. “Yup.”
“Got it all figured out?”
“Sure did.”
“Great. I’m happy for you,” Aegon says, and yet there’s a twinge of melancholy he’s trying to hide. It must be hard for him; he and Daeron are the only single ones.
“We’ll find you some suitable candidates for your harem when we get to Odessa.”
He chuckles. “Oh, come on.”
“Guys, girls? Do you have a preference?”
He’s smiling wistfully down into the water, a dark rippling mirror. “I have too specific a preference, that’s the problem.”
“Yacht girls in bikinis. Golf cheerleaders.”
“There are no cheerleaders in golf, you yokel.”
“Okay, well
I’m sure you’ll be very popular with the lonely, traumatized, widowed women of the apocalypse.”
Aegon gazes morosely out over the lake. He pitches the end of his cigarette into the water, and your eyes catch briefly on the black ink of the tattoo on his forearm: It’s not over ‘til you’re underground. “I don’t know. I’ve been sober for two weeks and now everything is annoyingly clear.”
“What’s bothering you?”
He waits a while before he answers, evasive. “I’ve never been good at anything.”
“Everyone feels that way sometimes. Luke thinks he’s not good at anything either.”
“But Luke’s nice. I’m a rat bastard.”
You laugh. “You’re kind of nice, Aegon.”
“Yeah right.”
“No, seriously. I like being around you. You make me feel better. You’re like
” You ponder how to word it. “I feel like I could tell you whatever and not worry about being judged for it.”
He snorts. “As if you’ve ever done anything judgeable.”
You shrug, peering out over the lake. “I abandoned my family. I stopped sending them money, I stopped calling. And when everything happened
the zombies, the world ending
I didn’t even consider going back to Kentucky to try to help them. I went west with Rio instead. And now they’re probably all dead and it’s my fault. That’s evil. I couldn’t have gotten away with that level of betrayal. I must be cursed.”
Aegon is watching you, eyebrows raised. He has never heard this before. “But your family sucked, right?”
“Yeah,” you admit. “I think it would be hard to argue they didn’t.”
“So fuck ‘em,” Aegon says simply.
You smile at him, touched, grateful. “Okay. Fuck ‘em.”
“I’m relieved my family’s gone,” Aegon confesses, something so brutal he’d never tell anyone else. “I mean
I feel kind of bad about my mom and Criston. But as long as they were alive, I’d always be the person they raised. And if I could bring someone back, it wouldn’t be any of them. I’d pick Rio.”
“I would too,” you say softly, staring down at the faint burn marks on your palms from when you were stranded on that transmission tower with him, talking him out of suicide, so adamant that both of you were going to make it to Oregon. And you were wrong.
“So if you’re cursed, Pita Chips, sign me up because I’m right there with you.”
Rhaena pulls out an earbud and says to Aegon: “I don’t get this album.”
“What?!” he exclaims.
“It’s so good!” you concur. On the shore, Cregan is spearing several gutted rainbow trout on sticks so they can be roasted over the fire. Ice is gleefully gulping down fish organs.
Aegon continues: “Whatsername! St. Jimmy! Jesus of Suburbia!”
Rhaena blinks, glancing between you and Aegon. “But neither of you grew up in the suburbs.”
“It’s not about the suburbs, Rhaena!” Aegon replies with frenetic hand gestures. “It’s about being disillusioned and angry and failed by all the adults in your life, and self-medicating, and losing love every time you get a taste of it, and wanting to burn everything down and start over. It’s about hating the world and the world hating you back.”
“Okay, sure. I still don’t get it.”
You say: “You might have had too happy a childhood.” And you and Aegon burst out laughing.
“You guys are so weird,” Rhaena says, but she’s smiling. She stands up, gives Aegon back his Walkman, and walks to the end of the dock where Cregan is cooking the rainbow trout. Aemond and Daeron are gathering up the aluminum buckets found at the campground and set outside earlier today to collect rainwater. There is one five-pound bag of trail mix left to share, and then all the food is gone. If Cregan doesn’t kill something, you won’t eat.
“We should go help them with dinner,” you tell Aegon.
He groans. “Should we really?”
“Yeah. We should.”
“Fine.” He takes your hand when you offer it and struggles to his feet. Then you inhale a lungful of the scent of roasting trout, and startlingly powerful nausea punches through your stomach, so repellant you have to clamp a hand over your mouth to stop yourself from retching.
There has to be something wrong with the fish. It’s never smelled like that before.
Aegon seems baffled. “What? What’s wrong?”
“Does the trout smell right to you?”
Aegon sniffs the air like a labrador. “I guess
? I barely smell anything.”
“Well you probably destroyed your nose cells with all the coke.”
“That’s discriminatory. Addiction is a disease.” But his brow is furrowed with concern. “Seriously, are you okay? You look awful. Not like that. You know what I mean.”
“I’m fine.” You don’t feel fine; but everyone down by the fire is chatting and joking around nonchalantly, and surely if there actually was something wrong they would have noticed. “I’ll be back in a second.”
“Sure,” Aegon says, perplexed.
You hurry past the others and take refuge in the cabin you’re sharing with Aemond. Inside the trout smell isn’t so strong. You sit at the edge of the bed and suck in several deep breaths, trying to calm down, willing the confounding wave of nausea to pass.
Did I eat something bad, did I get bit by a spider or something
?
You are checking your arms and legs for little raised bitemarks when Helaena enters the cabin and shuts the door behind her. When she opens her burlap messenger bag to root around inside, you glimpse photographs she must have taken from the beach house, the frames left empty on the mantle of the fireplace. Then Helaena pulls out a pregnancy test, just one, Clearblue.
You gawk at it. “What are you doing?”
“You look sick,” Helaena says matter-of-factly.
“Yeah, but I don’t think it’s that.”
She is puzzled, wide innocent blue eyes. “Why not?”
“Well
I mean
that would be freakishly quick, wouldn’t it? Like
quick as in immediately. People can’t get pregnant the first time they have sex, right?”
“Huh. They really don’t have sex ed in Kentucky,” Helaena says, and leaves you alone with your pregnancy test. You don’t feel so nauseous anymore, but you sneak around the back of the cabin to take it anyway, because now you’re thinking about the possibility with a vividness you’ve never experienced before: a round blossoming belly and tiny handprints and Aemond cradling his child in his arms. And by the time you get the result, you aren’t even shocked. It feels like something that’s supposed to happen.
You and Aemond don’t have a moment alone together until after dark, sitting on the porch swing outside your cabin for first watch, everyone else asleep, Ice dozing serenely by your feet. The only sounds are the breeze through the pine trees, cool and damp, and the hoots of owls, and the chirping of crickets and cicadas.
“So guess what,” you say casually as moonbeams float rippling and fractured on the surface of the black-glass lake.
Aemond smiles drowsily, not expecting anything. “What?”
“In approximately eight months, I might be having your baby.”
At first, he doesn’t speak; he only studies the test when you hand it to him, and then looks at you like he’s not convinced you aren’t angry, like he can’t quite bring himself to believe that you’d want this with someone like him. “Are you afraid?”
“No,” you answer honestly. Maybe you should be, but you aren’t. “I’m hopeful. I feel like as soon as I realized it, everything got brighter. And now I’m thinking about the future instead of the past.” They’re not going to grow up like I did. They’re never going to think they aren’t loved. “What should we name it?”
“Not Otter.”
You laugh, trying to muffle it so you don’t wake anyone. Ice lifts her head and stares at you curiously, her shaggy grey ears straight up.
“I don’t know, I’m terrible with names,” Aemond says; and now he’s smiling again, a wide radiant smile, and you know he’s thinking about the future too. “Hope or Peace or something. Something happy. Something about starting over.”
You take his hand. “I can’t wait to start over with you.”
“Just one more day,” Aemond says.
One more day.
~~~~~~~~~~
“So what am I going to do in Odessa?” Luke asks as the eight of you—nine, if you count Ice—trek eastbound on Route 140. You are about five miles from Lake of the Woods and halfway to your destination. It’s only 80 degrees and overcast, good walking weather, although there is a looming threat of rain, occasional rogue drops and far-off rumbles of thunder. “Everyone has valuable skills except me. Chips has great aim and can build things, Daeron has his compound bow, Aemond is basically a doctor, Rhaena is learning how to shoot guns and treat injuries
”
“Aegon has skills?” Cregan jokes, casting him a good-natured grin. Aegon acts like he’s going to whack Cregan with his golf club, which he’s spinning around haphazardly. Both his Marlin .22 and acoustic guitar are slung across his back. There aren’t many bullets left, but everyone has a few.
“Aegon can navigate,” Luke says. “And probably impregnate ten women a day. Very useful during a population crisis.”
“We don’t need that in the gene pool,” Rhaena notes.
“You wrote stories in college, right?” you ask Luke.
“Screenplays, yeah,” he says hesitantly. “But I wouldn’t say I was super talented or anything.”
Aegon claps him on the shoulder “Well I’ve got good news for you, kid. A big chunk of the world’s screenwriters are probably dead now. So you’ll look so much better in comparison!”
“Thanks
?” Luke says.
“What I mean is,” you continue. “You could write books for people to read, since there aren’t really libraries or Barnes & Nobles anymore. And you could interview people to get their life stories and then record them so they aren’t lost forever. The next generation should know what the world was like before the zombies.”
“Yeah,” Aegon says as he pets Ice. “Someone has to tell them about blue raspberry Icees, right Blue Raspberry Icee?”
“Maybe,” Luke says thoughtfully, and you notice that he’s smiling a little.
Ice begins whining, and there is a rustling in the woods to the north, low-hanging branches of bigleaf maple and dogwood and Douglas fir trees being forced aside. “Zombie!” Aegon announces, pointing. Immediately, Daeron nocks an arrow and then releases it, and the figure draped in the shifting shadows of foliage drops to the ground.
“Hey Aegon,” Daeron says after a few seconds.
“Yeah?”
“That was actually a zombie, right?”
“Totally,” Aegon replies, but he doesn’t sound certain.
Aemond turns to his older brother accusingly. “How sure are you?”
“Like
50%.”
“Aegon!” Rhaena cries, petrified, and everyone rushes off the road to investigate.
Blessedly, the felled creature is long-dead, a former park ranger whose tan uniform hangs in gore-stained tatters. The nametag reads: Underwood. The arrow pierced its soft rotting skull and remains lodged there until Daeron pulls it out to be used again, giving Aegon an impatient scowl as he does.
“Close call,” Aegon tells him. “Think they would have charged you as an adult?”
“Lord almighty, that gave me a scare,” Cregan says, chuckling. Helaena spies a blackberry bush and begins picking a handful, and Cregan goes over to join her. Rhaena and Luke are telling Aegon that he needs to be more responsible and should have waited for Luke to confirm it was a zombie with his binoculars. You exchange a glance with Aegon: he rolls his eyes, you offer a smirk of commiseration. Ice is already trotting back towards Oregon Route 140.
You haven’t told anyone else that you’re pregnant yet, but eventually they’re going to notice that Aemond won’t leave your side. He sighs and asks you: “Have you had enough of this little field trip?”
“Definitely.” You head for the road. Aemond walks with you, placing you not on his left side but on his right where he can see you. You ask, smiling: “You don’t trust me to watch your blind side anymore, huh?”
“I prefer the view the way it is.”
You are only a few steps from the black artery of pavement that cuts through the Cascade-Siskiyou National Monument, a 114,000-acre preserve of wilderness that somehow—although it is 2,500 miles away—reminds you a bit of eastern Kentucky, endless emerald forests, the omnipotent shadows of mountains. And because you are on Aemond’s right side, he can look down and see something just in front of you on the earth strewn with knobby roots and pine needles and dead leaves.
“Don’t!” he shouts, snatching your forearm and yanking you backwards, and he’s never touched you like this before—so forcefully, so violently—and you stumble and almost fall, and your arm burns and aches where he grabbed you, and people are asking what’s going on, and you peer up at Aemond with confusion, fear, mistrust.
“Why
?”
And then you hear it rustling from the same place where you were standing a moment ago. The others yelp and dash out of the way as the snake escapes into the woods, a drab spotted olive green, a rattling tail, an angular skull like an arrowhead.
“Aemond?” you say, because he hasn’t moved, hasn’t made a sound. He looks down, and your gaze follows his. On his right calf, just a few inches above his ankle, are two small puncture wounds from the snake’s fangs, each dribbling a thin river of blood.
“Northern Pacific rattlesnake,” Helaena says, her voice shaking, tears welling up in her horrified eyes. “Venomous.”
~~~~~~~~~~
Aemond has one arm draped across Cregan’s shoulders, the other over Aegon’s. He’s moving slower, or is that just your imagination? His steps are less steady, his breathing more labored. His leg is swelling, a deep blue phantom of a bruise spreading beneath his skin, so tight it looks like it might split open.
“We’re almost there,” you say; you keep saying it, because hopefully that will make it true. “We’re only a few miles from Odessa, and we’ll find people who can help us.”
“Aemond, you’re a doctor,” Luke says.
Aemond’s voice is weak, pained, hazy. “I’m not a doctor.”
“You know what I mean!” Luke yells, frantic. “How do we fix you? What can we do?”
“Nothing,” Aemond says listlessly. “There’s nothing you can do without a hospital. I’ll either get better or I won’t.”
“People in Odessa will know how to help,” you insist. “They’re outside all the time, they hike, they hunt, they fish, they’ve seen snakebites before. They must have. They’ll have treatments.”
“Aemond,” Rhaena breathes, and you turn to see there is blood running from his nostrils. You scream, and Aemond touches his fingers to his face and then watches as they come away bloody.
“Put me down,” he tells Cregan and Aegon.
“No—” you begin, but then his knees buckle and he’s on the pavement anyway, blood pouring from his nose and his lips, blood filling up his right eye. Cregan walks to the shoulder of the highway, his head in his hands. Aegon stays beside Aemond, and you’re kneeling there with him, both of you using anything you have to clean the blood from Aemond’s face: the corners of your shirts, your bare hands.
He’s covered in blood, you think. Just like Jace, Baela, Rio.
“Can’t clot,” Aemond is murmuring. “The venom causes coagulotoxicity. Internal bleeding too. I feel like
like there’s all this pressure inside
”
Rhaena is taking Aemond’s pulse like he taught her to, fingers on the underside of his wrist. “It’s really faint,” she says quietly.
You grab a plastic Gatorade bottle filled with rainwater out of your backpack and tilt it against Aemond’s crimson-stained lips. He manages to swallow some of it. “Aemond, listen to me,” you say as calmly as you can. “You’re so close. We’re almost there. I need you to hang on a little longer.”
He shakes his head, slow dizzy motions. “It doesn’t matter.”
“They might have doctors in Odessa.” This is a fantasy, but you can’t resist it.
“Even if they do, there won’t be any antivenom. And it’s too late anyway.”
“No,” you say savagely, a sob ripping through your throat. “We didn’t cross 3,000 miles so you could die here. I won’t let you. It doesn’t make any sense. It’s not fair.”
“Aegon,” Aemond says, reaching for him, drained and fumbling.
Aegon catches his hand. “I’m here.”
His eye—crystalline blue corrupted with red, blood in clear water—drifts to his brother. “You have to get her to Odessa. You have to help take care of everyone.”
Aegon is weeping. “Man, it’s supposed to be you. How can I still be here if you aren’t?”
“You can do this,” Aemond says.
“I’ll try.”
“I love you.”
“I love you, Aemond,” Aegon says, then crawls away on his hands and knees and collapses on the pavement, gutted, inconsolable, hemorrhaging grief instead of gore.
Everyone is crying and touching Aemond—his face, his hands—saying goodbye, accepting tasks, and they come away stained with red, and rain has begun to fall from a dark sky growling with thunder. Rhaena takes his medical kit. Helaena takes his Glock and stows it away in her messenger mag. Then Aemond looks for you, and now you are alone with him here in the middle of the highway, two golden lines on black asphalt, and with your thumbprint you whisk away the rivulet of blood that is spilling from his eye.
“You’re going to be okay,” he whispers as his heart fails, as his lungs fill with blood instead of air, as his pores leak rust and ruin. “Odessa will be everything we hoped for. I just won’t be there with you.”
“You can’t leave me,” you’re saying as rain patters against the road. I left my family and now my family is leaving me.
“Love,” he sighs, almost too softly to hear. “I don’t want to.”
You lie down on the pavement with him and rest your head on his chest, feel it rise and fall beneath you as the rain descends in sheets. And then Aemond exhales, deep and rattling, and he never tastes oxygen again, never speaks, never touches you. You don’t move from where you’re lying. You’re there until you’re drenched to the bones with rain and the world is a cold mist of pine trees, of wilderness, and you can never go back to any of the places you’ve been before, you can never get back the people you’ve left there.
Aegon is shaking you. “We have to keep moving,” he chokes out through tears.
You reply without looking at him. “I’m giving up now.”
“No you’re fucking not. We have to walk to Odessa.”
“Everyone’s dead in Odessa. Everyone’s dead everywhere. I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t want to stay in a world like this.”
On the periphery of your vision, you can see Aegon glancing at the others, standing just off the highway and under the canopy of the pine trees. He seems defeated, he seems lost.
Then suddenly Aegon turns back to you. “Hey!” he screams, so loudly you jolt upright, your palms on wet pavement, rain dripping from your hair. “I’m still alive. You’re still alive. This isn’t over yet. I said I would get you to Odessa, so that’s where we’re going. Stand up. Right now.”
Aegon holds out his hand. Thunder booms, lightning strobes, and then you take it. He pulls you to your feet and hesitates, as if he didn’t think he would get this far. Then he throws his arms around you, a crushing desperate embrace, a wordless devotion, a silent vow, sobbing into the curve of your neck, tasting the copper and iron of his brother’s blood on your skin.
“We have to keep moving,” he says again, like an apology, like he understands how impossible it feels. “The storm’s getting worse. It’ll be too dark to see soon.”
“We can’t leave him alone like this.”
“That’s not Aemond anymore,” Aegon pleads. “Aemond’s gone. And he would want us to live.”
Now the others are here on the road too: Daeron, Helaena, Cregan, Rhaena, Luke, Ice whimpering and licking scarlet stains of blood off your hands. You’re all holding each other; you’re all any of you have left. Cregan carries Aemond off the pavement and on a patch of grass alongside Route 140, the seven of you cover his body with branches of pine needles and white petals from dogwood trees. Rhaena is the first person to begin walking again, heading east. One by one you follow her. The downpour is torrential; if you are attacked now, you are nearly blind. Aegon stays beside you no matter how slow your steps are. You think if he disappears, you will too; the strings that tie you to the earth will fray and unweave and your bones will turn to mist, your voice will only be the wind howling down mountainsides. You have no way of knowing how long you’ve been walking or how many miles are left. You wonder what will happen to Aemond’s child if there is nothing for you in Odessa.
The rain is stopping. Now you can hear crows, woodpeckers, formations of geese honking in a foggy sky and squirrels scrabbling up tree trunks. Falcons perch watchfully on dead power lines. Rare aisles of sunlight are breaking through dissipating clouds.
They rise up out of the verdant jungle, a tangle of Pacific ninebark and blue elderberry: four figures in green camouflage, two men and two women, all wearing tactical sunglasses and wielding assault rifles, M16s you’re fairly sure, automatic and with 20-round magazines. Daeron moves to nock an arrow and then stops when he sees you’ve put up your hands. The others follow your lead: palms empty, willingly surrendering.
It’s them, you think dazedly. The people in Odessa. They’re alive, they’re real.
“Please cooperate and hand over all your weapons,” one of the women says, fifties, muscular, alert hawkish eyes.
No one moves. Then you unholster your Beretta M9—received from the U.S. Navy almost exactly five years ago, a different lifetime, a different world—and hold it out to the woman in your open palm. And now everybody else is giving their weapons over too: Aegon and Luke’s .22s, Rhaena’s Ruger, the spare Ruger and Aemond’s Glock hidden in Helaena’s burlap messenger bag, Daeron’s compound bow, Cregan’s axe. Ice peers up at Cregan anxiously, her yellowish eyes wide, but she wags her tail when he runs one of his large, calloused hands over her rain-soaked fur.
Aegon is still clutching his golf club. One of the men stares at him, incredulous. “You can keep that, son,” he says.
The woman nods to the men. “Nick and Glen will escort you five miles up the road, and then return your weapons. We ask that you keep moving and do not turn around. We don’t want trouble, but we can defend ourselves. Don’t think you can double back tomorrow and try to loot us or anything. This is your only warning. Do you understand?”
Aegon nudges your hand with his knuckles, then taps you harder when at first you’re too shellshocked to notice. You have to explain. You have to tell them why you’re here.
“I
I
” You begin, unable to make the words leave your lips, rats from a sinking ship, plummeting bodies from a burning building. Here you stand on a precipice, and with so many other people to save. “I served in the Navy with Bryan Osorio. We left Saratoga Springs together. He told me it would be safe here.”
Now they are interested. Slowly, the woman lowers her M16. “You know the Osorios?”
“I do.” I’ve known them for half a decade.
“Could any of them identify you and verify what you’re saying?”
“His wife, Sophie. She’s blonde, and she likes elephants, and she had a baby recently.”
The woman is scanning the faces behind you. “And where’s Bryan?”
“He’s not here anymore,” you say, and now you’re sobbing again. Aegon is squeezing your shoulder, his head bowed. “I’m sorry. I wanted to help him get home. I was supposed to warn him, I was supposed to stop it from biting him, but I didn’t and now he’s gone—”
“Okay, okay.” The woman motions for you to calm down, but her voice is kind. “Who are these guys? Your colleagues, your friends?”
“They’re my family.”
“You can vouch for them?”
“Yes.”
“You’ll all submit to searches for bitemarks?”
“Yes.”
The woman turns to the men she called Nick and Glen. “Take them inside, will you? Get the ID verified and then we’ll process everyone.”
“Got it,” the older man says. And then, to you and your companions: “Follow me.”
Nick and Glen lead you into the forest, the canopy of pine needles so thick the daylight turns to dusk, and you think of lightning bugs, of firelight, of drinking Guinness on the beach with Rio on Diego Garcia. There are several patrols, groups of four or five, that approach to stop you until they see Nick and Glen and wave you through. Then the trees open into a meadow of buttercups and daisies and pink fawn lilies, and beyond that an immense village, some houses decades old, others currently being constructed with logs from pine trees. There are hundreds of people tending to livestock, hanging up laundry to dry on clotheslines, digging in gardens, making candles and soap and butter. There are children playing without fear, giggling as they chase after scampering dogs, challenging each other to games of kickball and Uno.
In front of one of the houses that predates the apocalypse, brick with a screened-in porch, there is a small blonde woman standing in a garden, smiling and chatting with a middle-aged couple. The baby she carries against her chest in a blue sling has dark curly hair like Rio’s.
Sophie and the baby are here. They’ve been alive the whole time.
You rest a palm on your belly without realizing you’re doing it. “What happens now?” you ask Aegon.
“The rest of our lives.”
It is unimaginable, it is impossible, it is so full of luminous potential you feel like the light will spill out of your pores like blood, it’s an oasis, it’s a second chance, it’s an island in the vast lethal untamed blue of the Indian Ocean.
“Let’s go,” Aegon says softly, taking your hand and leading you across the field of wildflowers, kaleidoscopic blooms in the last days of summer.
219 notes · View notes
whiteferraristurns · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
đ•šđ•’đ•Łđ•Ÿđ•šđ•Ÿđ•˜đ•€ ⚠ none. no use y/n. fluff
đđ‘đˆêš„ rapper chris!!👅
reblogs, likes and comments are heavily appreciated á„«á­Ą
Tumblr media
Late Night in the Studio
The hum of the city faded into the background as you entered the studio, a small black bag clutched in your hand. The dim, moody lights cast a soft glow over the walls lined with platinum records, awards, and Chris's signature graffiti art—raw, messy, undeniably his. The faint scent of sandalwood and vanilla drifted from the candles flickering on the windowsill, the only soft contrast to the electric energy in the room. The space felt familiar, yet every time you entered, the charged energy made you feel like you were stepping into another world.
It was late—later than you would have preferred to be out on a Thursday night—but Chris had insisted, and you couldn’t deny the pull his voice held over you. You were used to the chaos that came with his life, the late-night calls and the constant tug-of-war between your schedules. But something about tonight felt different.
You leaned against the doorway watching how the pink lights lit up his features perfectly. “You look like you’re thinking hard over there,” Chris turned, adjusting his headphones before pulling them down to hang around his neck. He shot you that lazy grin that always made you feel like you were the only person in the room. 
“Just wondering why you’ve got me out here at midnight,” you teased, your  lips pulling up into a smile. “Don’t you ever sleep?” Chris shrugged, shoving his hands into his pockets with that lazy, too-cool look he always wore. “Can’t sleep when I’ve got inspiration running through me. You should know that by now.”
You rolled your eyes, taking a seat on the leather couch that stretched against the wall. It was worn and cracked, but you’d spent enough time here that it almost felt like home. “So I’m here to be your muse?” You arched an eyebrow, teasing, but deep down, you couldn’t deny the warmth his words brought.
Chris didn’t answer right away. Instead, his fingers ran over the soundboard, tweaking a few settings as he let the beat play softly in the background. He shot you a glance over his shoulder, his eyes dark and serious. “Actually, yeah. This one’s got your name all over it.”
The words hung in the air between you, heavy and full of meaning. Your heart skipped, but you tried to play it cool, tilting your head with a small smile. “You really expect me to believe you wrote a whole song about me?”
He nodded, and you could see the sincerity in his eyes. “It’s wouldn't be the first one”
Your mouth went dry. You knew he poured his life into his music, but the idea that he’d written about you was something else. You glanced away, biting your lip to hide the mix of emotions swirling inside you. “I don’t even know what to say to that.”
“Don’t say anything,” he murmured, leaning against the soundboard as he met your gaze. “Just
 listen.” Chris hit play, and the room filled with a steady, soulful beat, layered with smooth guitar riffs that softened the intensity of the bassline. Then his voice cut through, raw and honest, each line hitting like a confession.
“She’s the pulse that keeps me steady, when the world’s too loud to bear. She’s the reason why I’m breathing, even when there’s smoke in the air.”
The lyrics rolled over you, each word hitting deeper than you’d expected. You breath caught as you heard the pain, the longing, the way he seemed to reach for you through every line. It wasn’t just a song. It was a part of him—a part of your bond. You listened, your hand messing the necklace he had gotten you for your birthday. As his voice continued, weaving a story of nights you’d spent together, of whispered words in dim rooms, of a connection that neither of you knew how to define.
“She’s the storm that keeps me grounded, the spark behind every verse,” he rapped, his voice deep and resonant, each word laced with something you couldn’t quite name. “When I’m lost in this world, she pulls me down to earth.”
The track finally faded into silence, you blinked, realizing your eyes were damp. You hadn’t even noticed the tears pooling, too wrapped up in the emotion of it all.
“Chris
” you started, but words failed you. How could you tell him that you felt it too, that every time he left for another city or hit the stage, you were there with him, a part of your  heart stitched into every lyric?
He crossed the room, sitting beside you on the couch, his knee brushing against yours. The air between you both was thick with things unsaid, but his eyes told you everything you needed to know.
“It’s not easy, you know?” he murmured, his voice barely a whisper. “Balancing all this. Sometimes, I don’t know how much longer I can keep pulling you into this world.”
You swallowed, feeling the weight of his words sink in. You’d always known that dating Chris meant sacrifice, meant that your time was often borrowed and fleeting. But the thought of letting him go was harder than you wanted to admit.
“You’re not pulling me anywhere, Chris,” you whispered back, your hand reaching out to brush his. “I’m here because I want to be.”
For a moment, he looked away, his jaw tight. You knew that look—he wore it when he was fighting back something deeper, something vulnerable. You reached out, your hand resting on his, grounding him. Slowly, he turned back to you, his fingers threading through yours.
“What if it’s too much?” he asked, his voice low and hoarse. “What if
 I’m too much?”
You shook her head, squeezing his hand. “You could never be too much, Chris. You’re just
 everything.”
Your words hung in the air, soft and steady, the truth of them lingering between you. And in that moment, you felt like you were finally laying your cards on the table, every piece of your heart exposed. You leaned forward, closing the gap between you two, your lips brushing his in a gentle, tender kiss that held everything you couldn’t put into words.
When you pulled away, he held you close, his forehead resting against yours, and for the first time in what felt like forever, you stayed like that, just breathing, just existing in the same space.
“I don’t know where this is going,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion, “but I want to figure it out with you.”
You nodded, feeling the truth of his words settle in her heart. “We’ll figure it out, one verse at a time.”
And as you sat together in the dim studio, surrounded by his music, you knew that whatever happened, you’d face it together—through the highs, the lows, and everything in between. Because no matter what, you had each other, and that was enough.
Tumblr media
đđ‘đˆêš„ short n’ sweet. please tell how this was I lowk hate it😭
more fic’s will be out soon I just thought I’d post this one now since it’s been sitting in my drafts since the day after the video
TAGS Êšâ™ĄÉž
@sturniqloo @iillovechris @themotherofmattschildren @chrislilcumslvt @ghostlyplug @mattsfavginger @chrissturnioloenthusiastforlife @ncm9696 @starfuckoff @heartz4matt
164 notes · View notes
spookystrns · 2 months ago
Text
small surprise
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing : rapper!chris sturniolo x singer!reader
synopsis : reader is backstage at one of chris’s concerts when he decides to surprise the audience — and you
warnings : pet names (baby, toots), language, fluff, really short and really rushed
a/n : guys i’m back i swear
‘ music boyfriend, i'm your yum-yum
call me and i'll come ’
Tumblr media
you’re currently watching chris on stage from the right wing, singing along to every lyric. honestly you wonder why the two of you haven’t recorded a song together yet. you’ve been official for around 7 months, behind closed doors of course. you considered posting a soft launch on instagram, but ultimately decided to wait until the release of your next album — which will only be in a few weeks. thankfully, none of your fans have suspected anything yet, so you know the soft launch will really get them thinking.
chris’s set so far has been nothing short of amazing. he’s so full of energy and the stage is really just a way for him to let it all out. you can tell the audience are loving it too, with the way they all scream every time he opens his mouth. but you can’t blame them; you are too. every time he gives you a subtle look you can’t help but internally squeal.
he’s just finished performing one of your personal favourites, ‘knock knock’, but now that he’s standing in the centre of the stage, everyone’s silent. chris gives you a quick glance, earning a small, confused smile from you. he turns back to the audience with a smile on his face before announcing: “this next song is unreleased, but it’s for the most beautiful and talented girl ever; my girlfriend.”
at hearing the announcement, the crowd roars with excitement. chris looks at you once again, this time turning his whole head to give you a big smile. although he didn’t say who his girlfriend was, it still felt big. he goes on to perform a song you didn’t even know he recorded, but you do know it’s your favourite ever.
that was the last song on the setlist, so chris says a goodbye and thank you to the audience before making his way off stage, towards you. he jogs to you, smile bigger than you’ve ever seen — he was clearly pleased with himself. you get pulled into a hug, then his hands are cupping your cheeks and his lips are on yours. you kiss back, obviously, smiling against him as you wrap your arms around his neck.
“that was a surprise,” you murmur, pulling away just so your noses are touching. “yeah? a good surprise though, right?” his question is almost laughable, and you do let out a small giggle before responding. “yes, chris, a good surprise,” you smile and nod, earning a “good,” from chris before his lips are on yours again.
“what do you think about dropping your album a little earlier? and maybe i’ll consider releasing that song i wrote about you,” chris teases with a sly smirk as the two of you fall down on a couch backstage. you give chris a confused look as he pulls you closer to him. “i’ve already announced the release date,” is your response while looking up at him with your head on his collarbone. “fuck the release date,” his reply is quick, and it somewhat catches you off guard, furrowing your brows at him. “c’mon, baby, y’know you want to,” he gives you a look, a very convincing look at that. you roll your eyes before smiling slightly, looking back up at him as you reply. “i’ll see what i can do,” your words are quiet, but you know he hears you by the widening smile on his face.
“but if i do that, you have to release the song about me too,” you bat your eyelashes in an attempt to entice him, which he sees straight through. a low chuckle escapes him before he speaks, “okay,” chris nods, wetting his lips as he does. “okay?” you hold out your pinky finger, eliciting another chuckle from him as he locks his pinky with yours. “okay.”
you nod, satisfied with the promise, as you feel chris’s eyes on you. “hey,” he mutters, grabbing your attention. “i love you, toots,” his thumb begins softly rubbing a circle on your shoulder as you look up at him. “i love you too,” you smile, sealing your lips in a kiss once again.
266 notes · View notes
bodhrancomedy · 4 months ago
Text
8 Games Which Made Me Bawl My Fucking Eyes Out (in the best way)
Tumblr media
1. A Story Beside
Holy hell, I think the fact I played this one when I was isolating with COVID and terrified my breathing issues were gonna be permanent probably added to my complete sobbing breakdown at the end of this.
Every single chapter is a beautiful gut punch and the ending sequence where you guide Lyric back through her story? Heartbreaking.
Tumblr media
2. I Was a Teenage Exocolonist
This is probably one of my favourite games of all time and certainly one I’ve sunk the most hours into.
The fact that your first run-through is almost guaranteed to be full of failure and missed chances just adds to the pain I felt.
But the bug in the nursery. That’s what got me.
Tumblr media
3. What Remains of Edith Finch
I’m not sure there’s anything I can say about this game which hasn’t been said already.
Each new room puts another knife in your heart as you pull apart the seams of the Finch family curse with Edith as the last survivor.
Gregory was the moment I had to take a break to compose myself.
Tumblr media
4. Story of Seasons: A Wonderful Life
While I think this remake took some of the teeth out of the original, this farm sim which spans the life of your character is full of heartbreaking moments as you raise your child.
Honestly, being allowed to be queer and nonbinary in this game made me bawl because I remember wishing to both be a boy and love men in the older games.
Tumblr media
5. Dragon Quest IV
I could add several of the Dragon Quest games to this list, but after fighting the final boss for nearly two decades, beating this game had me sobbing for hours.
That last scene of Chapter Five had such a tiny little animation of our hero taking off his sword and that send me over the edge.
Tumblr media
6. Bramble: The Mountain King
I don't know where to start with this dark folktale of a game. From tragic monsters to absolute gut punches following great unsettling scares, this journey to save your sister as a scared child ripped my heart in two.
The hell Olle goes through for his protective sister is dear to my heart as a nervous little brother myself.
Tumblr media
7. Citizen Sleeper
The very concept of this RPG is haunting. A construct on the run from the corporation who took your body is sad enough, but the express love of humanity which runs through this? Beautiful.
I'm not very far through and it's already had me in tears twice.
Tumblr media
8. Outer Wilds
I don't think I can say a single thing about this game without completely spoiling it.
Go in blind, but be ready for heavy and sorrowful themes. All I'll say is when you hear the ending theme, have tissues ready.
266 notes · View notes
camilledlc · 4 months ago
Text
I think the fact that Careless Whisper is Vanessa and Wade's songs and Iris is Logan and Wade's is very poetic and holds a lot of meaning. Let me explain:
Careless Whisper is all about a relationship ending, the longing for this person you won't ever have again and full of regrets. It's a song about a love that will never come back ("sad good-byes", "now that you're gone", etc). I also think the song deeply explains their relationship (Vanessa/Wade) in general.
Wade is feeling very insecure about his relationship in general, knowing that he hurts Vanessa (2nd movie), that staying with her is kind of selfish but yet he doesn't want to let her go ("I feel so unsure", "there's no comfort in the truth / pain is all you find", "guilty feet"). Besides, the lyrics : "we'd hurt each other with the things we'd want to say" is very much them when Vanessa breaks up with him in DP3. Realistically, he knows that "it's better this way", because he isn't good enough for her in his mind. He hurts her and he doesn't matter enough. He knows the relationship have to end.
Yet, he is still very much desperate for her love, and can't seem to let her go, like seen in the 3rd movie. He wants her back ("Please stay", "Was what I did so wrong, so wrong / That you had to leave me alone?"), because he feels as if she's his one true love. No one has ever had him like this (shameless So High School reference). She felt like his soulmate, and losing her is losing this kind of love that you only find once in your life, it's like losing his soulmate. That's why he's "never gonna dance again / The way [he] danced with [her]". And the song adds "Never without your love", and I think it really represents his vision. He can't love again, and entirely be himself again if it isn't for/with Vanessa's love. She was the good thing in him, his one true love, and now he's wondering if he's ever gonna be able to have a love like this again ("But now, who's gonna dance with me?").
Now, Deadpool and Wolverine introduces Logan in the mix, and one of the main song in the movie is Iris. I think it represents perfectly Wade's state of mind during the movie, and his relationship with Logan. I do believe it's to be taken more from Logan's perspective, but the general theme of it is the same.
This song is a love song, yet very melancholic and tainted with sadness. It is very repetitive, and the singer already seems to know how things will play out. I think it puts us in the mindset of Wade, who had a previous relationship that seemed doomed because it would never work with who he is as a person and as a hero. He realizes that, and that a relationship with him can't last ("When everything's made to be broken", "And sooner or later, it's over"). Besides, a lots of other lyrics feels like they could refer to him feeling generally insecure about himself and who he is. He is aware that he is not necessarily a good person, he often lies to mask the truth about his feelings ("the moment of truth in your lies"). He is prompt to annoy, and attack, and doesn't mind being attacked back. He always puts himself in danger, and I think that the lyrics "you bleed just to know, you're alive" could explain why very well. And funnily enough, just before the song says : "When everything feels like the movies" and we all know that Wade knows he's in one.
So I think that we have a Wade that is deeply insecure about himself cause he knows he isn't necessarily a good person, he endangers himself and others constantly, and he can't be too surrounded by loved ones because he's gonna hurt them or put them in danger by his existence alone. He can't love and hold onto love. Yet, he wants someone to truly know who he is and to appreciate him for him ("I just want you to know who I am"). He is willing to be known by Logan during the movie, opening up to him. He always hides behind a mask, and symbolically, it's a way to keep people out. In the comics, it is even said that his scars causes him to often be left out of public spaces ; and in the first movie, he refused to go back to his girlfriend because of them, shutting her out too. Its like the lyrics : "And I don't want the world to see me / 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand", which can be read both literally because of his scars and metaphorically because of his personality, his tendencies to be 'weird' and 'annoying' as he talks and talks and breaks the fourth wall. Yet, he shows his face without a mask to Logan during the important moments, and he also shows him his true self. He wants Logan to know who he really is.
So, despite being broken down and knowing how and why his previous relationship ended, thinking that this one will have the same fate, Wade just wants to be known and seen by Logan, to be loved for who he is.
And I think Logan do, and he very much relate to the first part of the song. From his reality, he betrayed everyone he loved. He has no real home to back to, nothing to live for. This is why he is willing to give up everything to let Wade alive ("And I'd give up forever to touch you"). He wants to sacrifice himself not only because it's what hero do, but also because Wade doesn't deserve to die. Wade is the one who made him proud to wear this suit again, like shown in his flashbacks at the end ("You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be"). Then, they both go to save the world together, and they look in each other's eyes like nothing else exist ("And all I can taste is this moment / And all I can breathe is your life"). After years of being plagued by the voices of his friends, in this moment, he can't hear them anymore because all that exist is Wade and him saving the world, and his memories of Wade giving him a life again. He genuinely appreciates Wade for who he is and what is done, even staying with Wade in his universe and in his home ("And I don't wanna go home right now", "I just don't wanna miss you tonight").
In conclusion, Careless Whisper represents Wade's love for Vanessa, and how despite them having to break up, he never thought he could love someone else again. Yet, with Iris, we know that Wade is still insecure and unsure about it all, but is willing to open up for love again, to be loved by Logan.
(And last detail because i really wanted to include it but it was already very long, I like how the sentence "And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming" reflects how Wade was never really letting himself live truthfully. He never completely acknowledged his own emotions, and so he was spiralling and battling within himself but never could get out of this as long as he wasn't truthful about his feelings towards his need to matter. But in the end, eventually, he realizes that he matters, and there are no more tears to fight).
231 notes · View notes