#I will now tag this as vent maybe cause I am yapping

[wren-kitchens]

yk when you can feel yourself starting to stop caring about stuff you love and you are White Knuckling through it because no I Will still love this so fucking help me

[trenchgardens-ooc-ooc-ooc-ooc]

some externalizations from mod sundew. its long, irrelevant, and rambly so, cut :-0)<

guh. weve had. calliope finally step out of the metaphorical cupboard i shoved her in, a five pebbles resurgence (he decided i will be bodilt wearing a trans flag for the forseeable future and i could not agree more), locust trying to get the body to break something, looks to the moon came back and shes a comfort headmate i think- caretakers the word. uhh god. am i missing something

im gonna be mentally hugging a fat blue robot for a while.

its wierd to explain but like. i guess the kind of- our body gets really really- right- better phrasing: we're super like touchstarved. and touch is a really good way for us to calm down, but with our moirail living on the other side of an ocean, well yknow. so like. idk basically think if maladaptive daydreaming was less maladaptive, more(?) involuntary(??? (it occurs to me i dont know the mineutia of what maladap dayd actually Is)) and also shaped like a blue robot with paradoxicaalgy squishy everything.

ouhhh

what was the tag pepples used for his rambles, iterational externalizarion or something... maybe i should call mine weufing or yapping. what are husky noises called. awoowa borealis? well now i have to call it that...... no.. nevermind

calliope the headmate is so small in headspace. this is like. a whole ass child. like four feet tall what Are you you tiny wierdo

she is So incredibly a Something bearer though. intrusive bearer? like mituna but Not. Mituna but instead of impulses its something else

BSM appeared for the first time since. forever ago... ironically actually now that i think of it... her original forming was. Also while we were talking to a distressed Australian who is younger than us. note to self, BSM is all australian queers' sister i guess.

Ob also by the way headmate Locust is Sooooo a BPD holder. that little bug's borderlines can SO personality. its disorderly.

Pebbles being here and the Catharsis from . the crying. has made us. Angry. thats good. Anger is a very. very good thing for us. bodily, systemly. nothing convinces us to overpower our limitations like boiling fury.

Oh oh oh ... ohhh god who was fronting i think it was me yeah cause that was- Yeah that was me! ok i showed our art to a couple of the workers at the rafectory- the uhh cafeteria at my college, the lady who works shifts at the desk and who i always make a point to talk to, since i once accidentally said "you too!- er- eventually!" to her when she said enjoy your meal- i showed her our sketchbook. ot was really cool. it made our day i think.

huh this is probably what pickle was talking about when they (not to self ask pronouns) reprimsnded about uh. vent blogging. euuups.