#I will defend fhis angel with mt life get thee. behind me foul celestial being

[demonir]

4 am sleep deprived thoughts do forgive me if I make no sense but is no one else scared for Aziraphale’s future? He left earth he left his bookshop he left his earthly possessions and pleasures and he left the one other being in this universe that truly cares and understands him because he simply loves him so much and believes in being good so hard that he thinks he can change the way heaven’s system has worked since before time itself just so he can make life all the better for everyone, specially for him and Crowley

He is so brave and hopeful that he is ready to take upon himself the burden of heaven ON HIS OWN despite the fact that would be a monumental task for anyone let alone ONE single angel and I’m sure he knows this and I’m sure that’s part of the reason why he wanted Crowley to come with him because he knows he will understand him and that he can trust him to do things right but Crowley has given up trying to fix the system and would rather play 5D chess with the rules just so he can have the closest thing to a peaceful little existence alongside Aziraphale

Aziraphale is gonna be up there, on his own. Surrounded by angels that by all means STILL DONT LIKE HIM, angels that doubted him, looked down on him, insulted him and tried to kill him and you expect me to believe that because now he’s gonna be their boss they’re simply gonna behave? They didn’t even behave when Gabriel was the boss, what difference would Aziraphale’s presence make???? And that’s not to mention God herself, Aziraphale has lied to God before, he’s gone against “the divine plan” more than once but before he had the benefit of not being the supreme archangel, just some angel deemed “far too gone” because he spent too much time on earth… what is going to happen when he wants to object to God’s orders straight to God’s face? I worry for his safety and I am certain Crowley does as well

I wholeheartedly believe that Aziraphale could change everything because just like him I’m a childishly hopeful person that would rather not see the world as bleak and impossible to fix but I think it’s unrealistic to expect him to do it alone when he already has someone willing to move mountains and drain oceans if he just asked

Aziraphale might still have to let go of the last remnants of his black and white world views “I’m the good one, you’re the bad one!” His desire to cling to the idea that heaven is inherently good and hell inherently bad. He is NOT stupid not by a long shot and neither is he innocent, he just sees things differently from Crowley and his sense of duty as an angel is just as strong as his nature to love and forgive even if those are the very same things tearing his relationship apart

I’m sure he wants to fix heaven and then come back to earth with proof for Crowley that they can now be together and have that peaceful existence they both yearned for, meanwhile Crowley hopes Aziraphale will just forget everything and run away with him, no responsibilities, no heaven or hell, he might even compromise his plans and stay by the bookshop rather than the middle of nowhere space if that’s what his angel wants, as long as they’re together and FAR way from those that only brought them pain and anguish then it’s alright but him… after all he’s obviously fond of humanity and earth

In short I am just scared of what Aziraphale’s future holds but I admire his bravery and conviction and I’m sure he will be okay and reunite with his demon eventually, they can’t live without each other after all