#I will add Benny is an incredible survivor at the expense of his soul

[thunderdownunder]

Specifically modern modes of transit do not seem to suit him well. Ardeth does great with a Tommy gun and dynamite, so like weaponry ain’t the issue. But transit?

Airplane: crashes

Bus: crashes

Hot air balloon: crashes

Baby girl CANNOT be trusted on anything larger than a camel or a horse because 100% it’ll crash and he’ll almost die. PLEASE do not ask him to tag along in any vehicle for the safety of everyone else involved.

I just love The Mummy (1999) so much like I've always felt it was a masterpiece, I was never able to pinpoint the exact reason but I think I got it in my last rewatch: every single character is extremely competent in a very concrete, punctual and once-in-a-lifetime helpful skillset, and then they're ABSOLUTE DISASTERS on literally EVERY OTHER ASPECT of their lives. Evy can read and Sherlock her way through literally any egyptian riddle like she was born for it, but PLEASE, DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, leave ANY sharp objects, unstable structures or even-remotely inflamable objects ANYWHERE near her she WILL find a way to unleash HELL IN HER SLEEP. Rick can smash-parkour-swordfight his way out of any scenario but he has to have ALL neurons completely focused on the ONE (1) task at hand and if he gets out-DudeBroed he loses all his hit points his health meter goes red and he surprise-resets like a forced Windows update (see following scene for reference)

And don't even get me STARTED on Jonathan. This absolute gem of a man really is willing to let his sister drag him to hell and back with only mild complaining and will stop her human sacrifice ritual while the priest is mid-swing with an "hey Evy look we found the book!" with the same energy as if he was proudly announcing he found his long-lost car keys behind the couch but we DON'T blame him because he correctly spent his one braincell on THIS scene that changed the history of cinema forever:

In conclusion everyone is so very capable and so very pathetic at the same time and thus we have no choice but to stan