#I was only supposed to decide her house. WTF happened??!!??!

[inklore]

—🍊. 𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐒 𝐎𝐔𝐓 𝐀𝐔'𝐒 𝐎𝐔𝐓

this is not a writing challenge, this is just a list of summer au's that have been collecting dust in my google docs that i'm both sick of looking at, and also feel like for those who also really enjoy writing summery fics, could always use more inspiration or ideas for au's or scenario's (even if it's just smutty or fluffy blurbs).

please make note that anyone can use these for any fandom or character. it's literally for everyone, for whatever ship, gender, or verse. no one owns au's and everyone makes them their own and writes differently. so please do with the content below as you wish!!

you don't gotta tag me if you use one but would i love to read your beautiful work? hell yeah so feel free to if ya feel like it.

i separated each into categories + some might have added context or prompts because i have zero self control and like to be extra and add ideas onto things lmao.

hopefully someone finds these fun and helpful, happy writing my loves <3

LOCATION.

beach

ocean

ice cream parlor

lake town

ranch

summer camp

summer school

island

boat

fishing town

resort

the woods

national park

public pool

destination wedding

renaissance fair

lake house

bar

theme park

capecod

italy

winery / vinyards

country club

cruise ship

concert

RELATIONSHIP BASED.

brothers best friend ('unfortunately' spending the summer with your family)

neighbors au

exes back for the summer

bodyguard au (character a has to follow around reader whose some princess/rich girl on a vacation, bonus points if she's supposed to be on lockdown but refuses to stay at the hotel, even more bonus points if her parents sent her on this vacation as a rehabilitation for her bad habits)

best friends dad (you're spending the summer with your bestie and god her dads hot as hell)

mermaid x human

frat boy x good girl (last minute studying together before summer break, or maybe the frat is throwing a big grad party and reader decides to let loose for the first time in forever)

frat boy x sorority girl (it's giving rich hoes who can't stand each other who get caught doing something and have to do community service with each other alllll summerrrrr long, can you think of anything worse?!)

sitcom stars (they're both on some summer love show but fall for each other instead, or you're two celebs supposed to be fake dating on some mtv drama show in palm springs but you actually fall for each other)

park ranger x someone who thought going camping alone would be fun but oh shit i know nothing about the wilderness au

ex-best friends ex (a summer love but put revenge and 'we're only fucking because this friend screwed me over and it'll really show them' au anyone??)

lifeguard x parent au (or you saved my life let me repay you wink wink)

dads best friend

house sitter x house owner (or neighbor, or family member who came home early and wtf are you doing here and who are you?? or even the old i asked the neighbor to watch our house but also my wife wink wink)

babysitter who tags along on vacation with the family au

fake dating (for the summer)

friends to lovers was made for summer au's!!!

superhero x vigilante (nightly meet ups to keep the streets safe)

friends with benefits but only for the summer au

painter x muse

body found on beach x person who found them (+ the added bonus of the two of them working together to figure out wtf happened and how they got there)

sugar baby x sugar whathaveyou (free vacation? hell yeah)

roommates (renting a room for summer what could go wrong)

tour guide / local x tourist

camp counselor x parent of camper

friend group on a drama filled vacay au

the only single people at this resort for couples au

sad housewife x pool boy

DARK THEMED.

cult au

slasher au

hitchhiking gone wrong (or right)

monster au (summer is the perfect time to go exploring for the monster in the woods or the lake, ocean even, obviously)

haunted house au

ghost hunting au

hunter x prey (bonus points if they don't know they're being hunted until it's too late)

safe house au (gone wrong)

kidnapping au (it's giving 365 days but less shitty ok)

stranded au (on an island, in a creepy town, etc)

bestie's trip gone wrong au (the innocent looking guys at the pool who are gorgeous are actually super shitty and deadly omg, or the couple in the hotel room next to us are insane wow, or someone is killing us off...but it's someone within the friend group)

stuck in an abandoned amusement park au

INSPIRED BY.

grease au

dirty dancing au

x au (70s-80s pornstars au + added slasher element if ya wanna make it dark)

daisy jones & the six / rocker au (summer tour anyone?)

the white lotus (cheating au?? a couple hoping a vacation will fix their marriage, maybe even the whole shitty husband leaves you there and you fall for one of the resort workers)

50 first dates au (but make it 'i bet i can make you fall in love with me by the end of summer)

jurassic park au

i know what you did last summer au

friday the 13th au

the final girls au (aka you end up in your favorite movie and have to find your way out with a side of 'oh shit there's my fav character what if i stayed and made them fall in love with me instead', or go full final girls au and you're stuck in a cult horror movie and have to survive the night to get out of it)

outer banks / goonies au

schitt's creek au

romeo and juliet (1996) au

mama mia au (the prequeal tho aka boning a bunch of people and omg i'm pregnant who is the baby daddy tho??)

overboard au

OCCUPATIONS.

naturalist

farmers market vender

dog walker / dog sitter

dive bar singer

surfer

swim instructor

vet

journalist

camp counselor

author

cowboy

undercover pi

contractor

car wash attendant

lifeguard

gardener / landscaper

summer intern

tour guide

tutor

nanny

theme park owner

bartender

house sitter

summer farmhand

golf course caddy

sign-holder

movie theatre worker

uber driver

wedding photographer

hotel receptionist

RANDOM.

heatwave (how ever will we stay cool?)

shipwreck / stranded on an island au

rainstorm / hurricane au (stuck inside oh no what will we do??)

love triangle that shit

matchmaking au

love letters in a bottle au

drunken karaoke

kissing in the rain is top tier

workaholic letting loose au

(illegal) car racing au

road trip au

[sorrinslays]

More about the Belobog Roleswap AU

So, I decided to make this post because of @lesbianbootheng. Specifically, their reblog right here:

#hsr#role swap au#op i hope u know much i enjoy those aus and the fact u made one is So Cool to me#pls tell me u have more ideas bc dude? i’d love to hear em#and i hope ur comfy w/ me adding some ideas myself bc this sounds soo fucking cool dude like wtf#love the idea of clara and hook being assistants to the silvermane guards that’s so cool <3 it fits them surprisingly well#ALSO THE FUCKING NERD PELA BEING PART OF THE FIGBT CLUB?? idk that’s so funny to me idk why LMFAO#oleg being luka’s father is rlly cute i love that <3 my HEARTT#also svorg being slowly being aaprt of the landau family by serval fixing him and they start to consider each other as the other loved ones#serval is still a musician i hope she’d just be one of those underground artists (literally haha)#also love the fact cocolia/serval r a thing in this au that makes me so happy u don’t understand :3#their yuri is NOT doomed after all :3#also… bc this is a roleswap au imagine bronya as the new supreme guardian… can u see it?#how do u think she’d act as leader?#sampo + bronya would DEF need to reign her in haha#also. do u think geppie sees sampo interacting w/ hook/clara & thinks of lynx & wants to sob when he’s separated#bc I DO. i so fucking do

So here's some more insight on the lives of the characters!

Gepard

He has this rule he set for himself that he doesn't steal from the less fortunate, guards and children. Those he does frequently steal from are nobles and since he used to be one (technically still is) he knows the obsolete worst ones. Sometimes, when he learns something particularly bad, he leaves an "anonymous" tip in Sampo's office.

He tried to grow a side business out of selling flowers. Since he's not a guard he has way more time to actually engage in his hobby, unlike his OG counterpart, he can actually keep a plant alive. However the business sadly didn't end up working out.

He does have "disguises" so he can get groceries without being chased around, although they are all kind of terrible. He doesn't know jackshit about makeup so he relies on hiding his face instead (hats, masks, sunglasses and the like). Almost all of Belobog knows this but they just kinda don't bother him cause the disguise is so bad it's sad.

Whenever Clara and Hook see Gepard in his "disguise" they try to get Sampo to arrest him cause "it's literally the guy you chase everyday, he's right here, just get him!!!!!" only for Sampo to pretend not to recognize him. Gepard goes through all five stages of grief whenever this happens.

He has accidently bumped into Luka sneaking into the restricted zone on numerous occasions and both kept it secret. They have even fought together in secret.

There are rumours of the "Phantom Shielder" amongst the guards, which is just Gepard. He keeps trying to help in the snow plains, since he feels guilty for adding to the workload of the guards by committing crimes. He believes it to the least he could do.

He is a supplier of automaton parts and the like for Oleg. Luka has a sneaking suspicion that's the case but since it's Gepard's most legitimate business venture, he doesn't bother reporting it. Oleg is, like, the closest thing Gepard has to a father figure.

Sampo

As the Captain, he rarely has time to relax alone and anytime he does have the time he spends it in the far away snow plains looking for medicine for Cocolia. He sneaks away when he's supposed to be doing paperwork. Or he "loses track of time and stays on patrol for longer periods".

He has made deals with pharmacists all around Belobog, asking for "defect medicine" that cannot be sold to the public (because of such things as a wrongly colored bottle, wrong print, a small cracks etc.). Basically, he collects it without telling the pharmacists where it actually goes. They don't really question him and he brings it to Cocolia.

He has a house near the restricted zone, not because he wants to be "closer to the actions" as he tells people, but so that he can have more alone time. You need a good reason to be anywhere near the restricted zone or you have to sneak in, so his apartment is like a safe haven to him.

He doesn't have any tells when lying, contrary to popular belief. He has fake ones that he uses to trick Natasha. She believes him to be a bad liar because of this.

Anytime he has free time (which is not all that often) he is surrounded by children anywhere he goes. If you hear manic giggling across the streets you know Sampo has a day off. He will have at least two kids around him at all times and the parents have to practically peel them away from him.

Sometimes, whenever he spots Hook bothering Gepard while he's "in his disguise" he walks over and chats with Gepard just to fuck with him. It's incredibly entertaining watching the poor guy squirm as his voice cracks in ten different ways.

He actually knows if Luka sneaked in and disguised himself as a guard because there's a standard hair length soldiers in the restricted zone have to have that Luka does not follow. He never mentions it, just let's him do whatever since he believes Luka to be capable enough. He does like ordering him around just to fuck with him, seeing Luka flinch and do anything without making a sound or "deepening his voice" so that Sampo "doesn't recognize him" is very funny to him.

Luka

As much as he hates paperwork, he's infuriatingly good at it. So he's probably staying an intelligence officer for a long while. Seele told him as much after a meeting with Natasha. He had begged Seele to bring up his situation, arguing that he's healed now and can go back to the front lines. Seele, true to her word, did mention him, but Natasha shout down any conversation about him, stating he's "too useful as an intelligence officer".

He used to have a small crush on Sampo. He was impressed by his fighting and was asking the Captain for a spar for weeks before the other agreed. It's still unknown if he still harbors that crush. The crush doesn't necessary have to romantic, it's honestly up for interpretation.

He attends every funeral, celebration and memorial held in honor of the Silvermane Guards. It's based on respect but also a little bit of guilt on his part. He believes that if he hadn't lost his arm, he would've still been in the front lines and he could've stopped some of the death that happened in the snow plains.

Whenever he is cooped up in his office for long periods of times, Clara and Hook are tasked (by Sampo, as their "superior") to get him out. Usually, they steal an important document and have him chase them all over the city. By the time he gets back, the day is over and he is ordered to go home and rest.

During his days off, he helps Oleg around the workshop. Oleg has tried to reassure Luka many times before that he doesn't need to keep helping, although all of them were in vain.

He has tried getting new hobbies to distract himself, and one that he enjoyed more than he thought he would was crocheting and knitting. He made matching scarfs for Clara and Hook and Seele called him a granny. He challenged her to a spar after that (he lost).

Whenever Luka and Gepard sneak into the snow plains together, they get into "competitions". Basically, they try to kill more fragmentum than the other. Usually, it's a tie or one of them winning by a small precent (like one or two more kills).

Natasha

Just like every other Supreme Guardian, she graduated in history. Although that's the case, she was always fascinated by human biology and the structure of the human body. She became even more interested after she met a man by the name of Vache, who told her he wanted to make a medicine specifically for people to be able to survive the bitter cold. After Cocolia banished Vache to the snow plains, Natasha brought him to Qlipoth Fort. He is still alive, even after the Astral Express' visit.

She really likes teddy bears, they used to be the only emotional support she had back when she was first selected to be the future Supreme Guardian. She had shared this information with Oleg, and since they used to be very close back in the academy, a lot of her stuffed toys were left at Oleg's place. So their absence during the Stellaron's manipulation helped her spiral quicker.

Vache lives in the lab of Qlipoth Fort and he is, basically, Stellaron 2.0. Since he also believes the Stellaron, he tries to pressure Natasha into following its plan. Natasha, isolated from any actually healthy influences, gives in and soon orders that result in more deaths than victories follow.

She and Oleg used to be very close, to the point that they even grew flowers together and used to babysit children together as a way to gain a little something something on the side. Whenever Luka reports to her, she asks about Oleg and how he's doing, every time she asks she has a wishful expression on her face.

Natasha was actually very suspicious of Sampo in the beginning, after all, before he joined the Silvermane Guards she hasn't heard a thing about him. She remained suspicious of him even after years, until the end of the Belobog arc. When he first made waves, she researched every little thing about him.

Oleg adopted Luka after his break up with Natasha, so when she first saw his last name she cried. She genuinely thought that she had missed a wedding or something.

Doctor handwriting. Even in another universe she couldn't escape the illegible doctor handwriting curse.

Seele

Used to go to the same elementary, middle and high school together with Luka. He was just a year or two younger than her. As a kid, she used to think he was okay, then during middle school she found him annoying and now it's a mix of two. However, he's probably the closest thing she has to a best friend and it's the person she trusts the most outside of Natasha.

She focuses a lot of her combat abilities. Since Natasha doesn't let her go on too many missions and she's not aware she's supposed to be the next Supreme Guardian (she is under the impression that she is just Natasha's adopted daughter) she doesn't think about the political situation or strategies all that much. She much prefers fighting the fragmentum.

Although technically she has a higher position than Sampo, whenever she gets overzealous during training or pushes herself too hard, she'll "be put in time out" by Sampo. Basically, she will be training and Hook and Clara pop out of nowhere, telling her how it's "time for a break, or else Sampo will put you in time out". She always tries to get out of it because she finds it stupid, but honestly dealing with Hook and Clara is a challenge in it of itself, so, unfortunately for her, Sampo's tactic works annoyingly well.

At first, she was struggling a lot in school, specifically with writing. When Natasha first caught wind of this, she sat down with Seele and they spent a whole evening just writing and Natasha helping Seele with school work.

For almost her whole life, Natasha and Oleg were together, so when Natasha turned distant and they broke up, she basically lost her parent. She visits Oleg's workshop every now and then, but they definitely aren't as close as they used to be. Now, unfortunately for her, the closest thing she has in her life that actively acts like a father figure is Sampo.

She regularly makes bets with soldiers in the front lines. Like, "oh, I bet Kyle can't headshot five fragmentum in a row". In general she is very friendly with them. Natasha is not a fan of that.

Luka asks her for a spar session almost any time he sees her. While it "annoys" her, she find comfort in the fact that she can tell him mood easily like that. She knows that if he's just fired up he gonna ask one or two times and if he feels bad for whatever reason, he's gonna be more persuasive.

Oleg

To him, the Neverwinter workshop was something that would've happened one way or another. He always knew that at some point he would own a workshop, however, what he didn't expect was how soon it would happen. He imagined opening it in his late forties - early fifties after passing his Stellaron research to a younger researcher. He never expected to have the nasty break up with Natasha and getting kicked out of the Silvermanes like that.

A side hobby he picked up after losing his job as a researcher was sketching. Whenever the workshop goes through a slow period with no customers or any work to do, people can find him outside, sketching whatever he sees.

When Luka lost his arm, he was devastated. He was so scared for his son he soot out Natasha, asking if she can find a better position for Luka that doesn't endanger him so much. Although he feels guilty for taking the choice from Luka, he also prefers feeling guilty with a son than feeling guilty without a son.

Back when Luka used to be in the frontlines, he wanted to meet his superior (Sampo) just to be sure that the Captain was capable. His first impression of Sampo wasn't a positive one, but after hearing about his achievements in battle, anecdotes from other guards, seeing Luka's admiration of him and seeing him around the street playing with the kids, he backed off.

He still misses Seele, even though technically she's not his kid. Even though that's the case, he still makes sure to prepare birthday gifts for her and congratulate her on any achievements.

He teaches Hook and Clara the basics of engineering. Every week he dedicates two hours for them. It's actually one of his favorite past times cause it livens up the place and reminds him of back when Luka and Seele used to be kids.

He still thinks about his research, specifically the Stellaron. He really wants to continue studying it and oftentimes thinks about it. He has a lot of theories about it but can't test any of them out.

Cocolia

She met Serval when the Landaus first moved to the Underground. While all the siblings have a positive opinion of her and they generally get along well, she and Serval clicked almost instantly. Serval helped her a lot with the orphanage, then with the clinic and finally with Wildfire.

Even though the Underground's atmosphere is pretty depressing, Cocolia tries her best make it more homey, warm and, in general, uplift the people. There's a reason why the people of the Underworld trust her with more than just medical issues.

One of her attempts to make the Underworld more welcoming was plants. Although most of them require sunlight, she got Sampo to look for ones that can survive without it. And just like that the Underworld is full of plants (as much as it can be). Unfortunately not all parts of the Underworld have a flourishing flora, the unlivable parts (thanks to the fragmentum) don't have any.

While she is a doctor and a healer is general, if it comes down to it, she can hold her own in battle. She uses a bass guitar when fighting, the one that in the original Serval broke during her companion quest.

She and Bronya have a very strong bond. They spend hours talking about different ways to optimize Wildfire. Serval helps with that too, either as the face of Wildfire or by suggesting ways to update equipment or create new weapons. Whenever Sampo is present, his input is asked as well, although he mostly helps with strategizing and ways to get rid of the fragmentum.

The hardest choice she had to make was exile Vache. She was conscious of his downward spiral when he started obsessing over blizzard immunity but the human experimentation was kept a secret from her until Lynx mentioned hearing something about it. Needless to say when she found out she was heartbroken.

She is well liked by all the children, and she always has some sort of candy on her desk. It's either for children who are being treated or, at the end of each day, the most behaved kid gets two.

Bronya

Although she didn't go to school, she knows the basics thanks to Cocolia and Serval. So now, her favorite hobby is reading. She has read as many books as she could get her hands on. Anytime she sees Sampo, she asks him to deliver her a book or two.

While she is part of Wildfire and she does fight against the fragmentum under Serval's command, whenever fragmentum activity is low, she is seen helping around Cocolia's clinic. While is mostly acts as a nurse following Cocolia's orders, she is still very skilled, to the point that other nurses sometimes call her "Cocolia 2.0".

She has learned the basics of engineering from Serval. It's a skill that comes in handy more often than not, from fixing up children's toys to helping fix equipment that was broken by the fragmentum.

The kids love her too. Whenever they get into trouble the first person they go to is Bronya due to her "not being an adult" (she is, she is just the youngest one working in the clinic so they assume she's still a teenager).

She has heard a lot about Gepard, but she has never actually met him since she wasn't adopted back when the Underworld and Overworld weren't separated. Despite this, she feels as if she had known him forever because of how often Serval and Lynx mention him. As if he's still here, with them.

She and Pela are good friends. Thanks to her, Bronya got into the Tales of the Winterlands. That series got her to wish to one day go to the topside and see the snow plains for herself. It's a wish she holds close to her heart.

She is close to Lynx as well, they spend a lot of time together due to her being the little sister of Serval. The two of them started reading Tales of the Winterlands together thanks to Pela and both of them loved it. They have spent hours talking about what they want to do in the Overworld.

Pela

She is a very important part of Wildfire not only because of her strength but also because of her great investigation skills and data collection. Thanks to her, Wildfire is not only able to catch troublemakers but also because she could predict future fragmentum activity based on the data she managed to collect.

She was the one who investigated Vache when Cocolia first heard of the rumours. She had come to Pela as a friend, asking for help, not as part of Wildfire. Pela accepted to look into it for free, and gave it her all. Let's just say the investigation wasn't all that pleasant.

She has created a fake identity that she uses to bet on herself. She is very strategic about it too. If she wins too many bets, she makes sure to stage a few loses to keep the attention away from her fake identity. She has made bank with that strategy.

Moreover, the reason she is still technically in debt is because the person she owes to is in the Overworld, so she had no way to reach him and she can't ask Sampo for help. She has a small box in her apartment that is the payment to her debt. She's not sure if there's any extra payment due to being late (although it's not really her fault) but just in case she keeps some extra shield.

Her closest friend is Lynx, they hang out together anytime Lynx isn't with Svarog. There's moments were they don't talk, Lynx just shows her picture as they cuddle on Pela's sofa and that's probably their favorite activity. However, anytime Lynx is in a talkative mood, the two of them theorize on what Gepard is doing in the Overworld.

She preforms in Mechanical Fever with Serval. It's a way for her to gain an additional income while hanging out with her friends (Serval, Lynx and sometimes Cocolia (when she's not busy with Wildfire and the clinic, which is pretty rare)). She is a drummer, her drumsticks are handmade and very sturdy (build by Serval) and she uses them when fighting as well.

She participates in a lot of food completions (like eating all 5 crabs that are in the game), but her favorites are the ones with spicy food. She and Serval were the ones with the biggest rivalry in a spice tolerance competition.

Serval

When she and her siblings first moved into the Underworld, they could only afford a one-bedroom apartment. She and Lynx shared the bedroom and Gepard slept in the living room. Soon, after Cocolia formed Wildfire, Serval go the opportunity to move. Now, she lives with Cocolia in a four-bedroom apartment, one for her and Cocolia, two bedrooms for Lynx and Bronya and the last one for Gepard.

While she is part of Wildfire, she also has her own "workshop" which is just her "experimentations" on automatons. She wants to create truly sturdy ones that can handle the fragmentum so that people don't have to risk their lives (and to also win in automaton fights shhh!!!!!).

While she doesn't like Svarog, she still helps him fix up a few things here and there, although she doesn't approve of the way they run their part of the Underworld she understands that he is an important ally. Plus, she gets access to better tools/materials.

She is still the lead singer/guitarist in Mechanical Fever. Most of her songs are about hope and a brighter future, it's her way of helping uplift the people of the Underworld. She is the most popular artist in the Underworld because of this.

When Sampo first arrived to the Underworld, she asked him about Gepard. More specifically, how he's been, if Sampo knows anything about him (whereabouts, health and the like). While he answered her questions, she asked if he could bring Gepard down, but he said "not yet". He did give her other reasons as well, but the "not yet" stuck with her.

Whenever Bronya and her go for patrols or missions together, they just talk. Like, they do get the work down, but they have insanely good coordination skills and synergy together that it's a breeze for them so it works more as a bonding moment rather than work.

The one taking care of most plants in the Underworld is Serval because they remind her a lot of Gepard and his love for plant life. On especially lonely nights she imagines his reaction to seeing how much the Underworld has changed since last time he was there.

Lynx

The reason Lynx got so attached to Svarog was because he possessed a lot of knowledge about the outside world and he could answer a lot of her questions. He once even showed her a projection of how the aurora looks back in the snow plains.

Before meeting Svarog she had tried to go to the surface to, one, find Gepard and, two, to see the Overworld once more. She went pretty far, but she couldn't unlock the Furnace Core, so she had to leave before Svarog found her.

She once confided in Pela that she doesn't remember Gepard's face, that it's very blurry for her and that she feels very guilty about it. She is frustrated because she does care about him and Serval always gets a sad distant look when he's brought up, but whenever she is trying to imagine the three of the reuniting, she can't picture it.

She has tried reasoning with Svarog on multiple occasions, but the robot never changes his mind. She still hasn't lost hope whatsoever. After all, her dream, aside from reuniting with Gepard, is to visit the snow plains.

She knows basic engineering thanks to both Serval and Svarog. Although she is not very interested in it. She prefers learning about the outside world much more, but it's useful information so she doesn't argue.

Whenever she wants to get a few extra shield, she goes to the fight club to bet on Pela. If she is not participating, she follows Pela's betting advice. She almost always wins, but that's because she doesn't visit the club that often.

When she met Sampo, she had asked for pictures of the snow plains, since she learned he fights the fragmentum there. He obliged and now she has a whole pin board dedicated to those pictures in her room.

Hook and Clara

The two of them are a very big deal in their school. They brag that THE Captain of the Silvermane Guards has them as "assistants". At first, the other kids didn't believe them when Hook said that they work for Sampo until he comes pick them up from school one day (Fersman was busy).

While the two of them have their separate bedrooms, every night they have "sleepovers" which is basically them sleeping together in each other's bedrooms. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays they sleep in Hook's room and on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays they sleep in Clara's room. On Sundays they play rock paper scissors to decide where the sleepover will be.

Seele had to explain to them on multiple occasions that they are not official Silvermane Guards. Hook refuses to listen and Clara is just confused. Both insist that they are cause "uncle Sampo told us we are under his command!!!!!!!!! You're just jealous your boss isn't as cool as ours!!!!!"

While they get a lot out of following Sampo's orders, they are still not allowed in the restricted zone. They don't get it, and Sampo dances around the issue, ordering them to do things outside it like bringing lunch to Luka or something.

Both of them are really scared of Natasha. They've seen her once or twice in public appearances and whenever they bumped into her in Qlipoth Fort, and while at first she seems nice, something about her scares them. Most of the time whenever they see her they run to hide either behind Sampo or Fersman or Luka.

Once, Sampo had an infiltration mission but Hook and Clara kept wanting to hang out with them. Sampo noticed Gepard in his terrible disguise and told them to follow him. They ended up pestering Gepard all day instead.

Anytime there's a disagreement between them they solve it with a game of rock paper scissors. Even when doing homework. If one of them got a 7 as an answer while the other got a 100 they play rock paper scissors and list the answer as whatever the winner got.

[claritys-silly-things]

It’s my birthday woah

Anyways hcs

- Soda and Johnny dyslexia real?

- (Modern) Soda texts how blitzø does in helluva boss and pony had to translate for Darry a lot

- (Modern-ish to modern) Soda blasts tf outta Bruno mars when the Curtis boys are cleaning, and honestly they vibe with it. Him and twobit are such big Bruno mars fans. Steve hates Bruno mars but brushes it off bc soda likes his music

- (Modern) Rip pony and Johnny you would’ve loved Conan Gray and Mitski

- (Modern) Cherry and Marcia like Sabrina, Olivia, TS, artists like that but also Billie eilish, Renee rapp, and Chappell roan, etc. Cherry and Marcia kiss each other.

- (Modern) Marcia also listens to Midwest emo and shi. Also normal emo music. Johnny aswell.

- (Modern) Ponyboy LOVES tv girl

- (Modern) Sometimes cherry is just in the mood to listen to the most hardcore music ever and you’ll look at her and think she’s vibing to something sweet and girly and she takes her headphones out to hear you talk and it’s just screaming

- (Modern) Cherry and pony actually just have the most random assortment of music in their playlists I’ve decided. They have so many liked songs.

- (Modern) ponyboy would cry if he lost an account to something like Pinterest or Spotify, or just anything he’s had for a long time.

- (Modern) Pony leaves his phone on dnd (do not disturb) constantly. He never got Darry’s texts and Darry was like “dawg wtf” and made pony have it so Darry and soda go through the dnd. Johnny also goes through.

- (Modern) Johnny will just give himself piercings galore and his parents practically never notice because he’s either never at the house or they don’t care enough to perceive their son

- (Modern) Pony and Johnny have matching insta bios. They’re tv girl lyrics.

- (Modern) Ponyboy actually puts effort into choosing and editing pictures he takes, especially if he’s posting them, and even more especially if it’s johnny he’s posting. Johnny will just choose the goofiest possible pictures he has of anyone, ESPECIALLY pony, and post them. He literally has a picture of pony delirious and sick flipping him off as his lock screen

- Twobit taught his sister swear words and every time she says one their mom just glares at twobit

- Pony and johnny have matching earrings on opposite ears

- (Modern) Darry only lets pony get ear lobe piercings, but pony wanted an eyebrow piercing and got johnny to do it and when Darry noticed (immediately, mind you) he was grounded for two weeks. He was able to keep it though bc darry was scared it would get infected or heal weird

These next few I’ve had for a while but they were in another list for some reason?? On accident???? Oops

- Pony and Johnny would LOVE mitski and Conan gray in modern au

- Darry is really good at dancing, and before everything happened with his parents would do dance classes on his free time (which he didn’t have a lot of)

- Dally is aromantic.

Okay that’s it the rest I came up with in the past week

- Pony will draw or paint or whatever on anything around him. Don’t leave him alone with art supplies because one moment he’s painting a picture and the next his hand is painted blue. (me)

- Pony will get marked as rude a lot for not continuing conversations but it’s just because he doesn’t realize he’s supposed to say something back and gets anxiety when he doesn’t know how to continue a conversation (me)

- (Some parts of this are modern) Pony and johnny are like attached to each other. If pony is at his desk reading or drawing or doing schoolwork or smth, Johnny will pull up a chair and either rest his head on his shoulder from behind or hug his shoulders from behind to watch. If Johnny is just chilling on his phone, pony will appear next to him and immediately watch over his shoulder and curl up to Johnny. Johnny’s sleeping at the curtis house that night? You better move to the spare room soda, pony’s gonna sprawl out on the bed and Johnnys right up next to him. Pony hovers a lot around Johnny. It’s an anxiety thing

- (Modern-ish bc reasons I can specify) Pony will sometimes just mess with people’s hair without meaning too. He’s used to being able to fidget with and braid Johnny’s or soda’s hair so when he’s with someone it’s like a habit. He was chilling and yapping with Cherry and Marcia once and just reached for the ends of Cherry’s hair and started braiding. When she asked he was like “oh mb” and she’s like “nah, you’re fine girl” and now they all just do each other’s hair sometimes

- putting this here it’s not a hc but it was GONNA BE until I FORGOT (I am now mad)

- There’s gotta be a reason pony doesn’t like green yall…

- (Modern) pony uses gacha sometimes just to like come up with character designs or if he’s bored, but keeps that shit HIDDEN. if anyone around him (besides maybe Johnny) saw he would NEVER hear the end of it

- Soda likes sweets a lot and has like adhd executive dysfunction which just results in lots of cavities bc it physically pains him to brush his teeth sometimes (so me besides the cavities)

- Two bit kleptomaniac real

[lanterns-and-daydreams]

SECRET SANTA EXTENSION!!!!

@eternal--dream I promised headcanons, therefore I will give u headcanons

"This is gonna be so lit!" Leo grinned, his lips pulling back to reveal sharp teeth as mischief danced in his eyes, a clear indication that he was up to no good, and neither was the boy next to him.

"Lighting it on fire on 3... 2..." Xander Hawthorne began the countdown, holding the lighter near the emerald green leaves of the Christmas that was set up and decorated in the middle of Camp. They'd noticed Hayley being a little sad, her usual demeanour dulled. This was their first Christmas without Carlos, and it had been the heaviest on Hayley's heart. Xander and Leo had decided to add an extra flair to the event this year, hoping it would cheer up their friend, and ease her grief, even if just a little bit.

"...1!" Xander exclaimed, extending the lighter and watching the tree go up in flames, making it look a little devilish, yet giving a stark contrast to the otherwise snowy surroundings.

What they hadn't expected, however, was their plan to fail. The tree was supposed to shoot up some tiny fireworks high enough for Hayley to see, and hopefully smile at, but instead, balls of fire shot up instead, landing on many other decorations and setting them on fire, as the devilish flames continued to eat away at everything and worked to conquer land faster than Genghis Khan

Both Xander and Leo stood there, watching it happen with parted lips and wide eyes and screams of panic and fear arose throughout the place.

"We're cooked, aren't we?" Leo mumbled ,low enough for no one but Xander to hear

"Burnt and roasted more than Camp." Xander replied in the same tone, right before spotting Hayley running over, her quick feet breaking through the treeline of the forest.

"It was nice knowing you, Xan. You were very sigma." Leo dramatically saluted to the tree.

"Thanks, Leo. I worked hard on my Ohio rizz. May our gyatts rest in peace." Xander placed a hand over his heart and closed his eyes.

-The trouble they got into after that could've made even Percy swear to be good.

-Despite getting yelled at for what felt like several hours, Leo and Xander still snuck glances at Hayley as they all say in the Big House, subtly making faces at her when Mr. D and Chiron's backs were to them, trying to make her laugh.

-She nearly laughed when Mr. D was talking, a snicker escaping despite her best efforts at suppression, making Mr. D glare daggers at her.

-Since she found it so funny, she could take part in the hilarity of their punishment, Mr. D announced, his kind person immediately telling her to shut up when she tried to explain.

-One of their punishments was to scrub the dishes and both Xander and Hayley had to stop Leo from trying to eat the lava.

-Its experimental, he swears on his foot's pinky!

-But that wasnt the only mischievous or troublesome thing they've done. They have a record, of course.

-But aside from being the Camp Gremlins, they were inseparable. Often sneaking to sit at each other's tables, having sleepovers, or seen just playing tag and hide and seek in the strawberry fields.

-You want gossip? These guys definitely know a bunch. The sideeyes are top tier, but unfortunately, all three of them suck at suppressing their laughter.

-Hayley likes to make fun of Leo for not being able to swim very well.

-Xander likes to make fun of both of them for being so short. He calls them his "little funky dwarves"

-Both Xander and Hayley know about Bunker 9 and Hayley often watches the boys build or listens to them yap about complex machinery and math.

-Girl tries her best to understand but wtf are they talking about, man.

-Everytime an argument breaks out between them, despite it's rarity, they all argue in gen alpha. Well, Hayley tries. It's impossible to not laugh mid argument.

-Leo is dyslexic, and Xander isn't very interested as Hayley is in novels and general reading. But both of them always try their best to read and understand the books they know Hayley likes so she can talk about it with them.

-They have friendship bracelets

-You can sometimes find all three of them sleeping in the fields, leaning on each other.

-Fights and harsh words are extremely rare, but no matter how upset they get with each other, at the end of the day, they always say I love you and goodnight before bed, coupled with a warm group hug.

[scarareg]

Percy Jackson and The Olympians Season 1 Review (2/3)

Part 1 • Part 3

What I dislike:

The action scenes are lacking. An example is Percy fighting Mrs Dodds: 1rst-Why did it happen in front of everyone? That makes not sense. Yes, the Mist hides stuff but if a woman attacks a teenager everyone will see it! 2nd- It was weirdly paced. Like one second Mrs Dodds was standing and the next she was dead. It took me a second to realize what happened. It was anticlimactic and Percy basically did nothing,he was just lucky Riptide opened up just in time to stop her. Another scene like that was the fight against Ares. To me it was "just fine" yet not epic. I feel it should be a little longer and I wish to see more of Ares using his battle tactics and powers, he is the God of War after all. Again, it is ok for what it is but it definitely could and should have been a bigger moment as a season finale, as Percy's moment to be a hero and prove himself, and as a demonstration of power level and difference between a mortal and a God! Also, it feels kinda insane that a guy with almost no training can defeat Ares so easy. That is a problem that stems from the lack of screen time at Camp in the first episodes,seeing Percy learning how to fight; sadly it backfired in the season finale. And you may say "well,these scenes include kids so is harder to make a bigger,more explosive,more incredible action scene than if they were adults" but it's possible. In House Of The Dragon a scene with five children fighting with only sand,a rock (that is not even used) and a dagger has way more tension than the God of War fighting our hero. The Minotaur scene was fine too. There are some changes like in the book Sally tried her best to distract it but because she is a normal human she could not do much, the whole taunting the Minotaur was Percy's stuff showing his bravery (I like the idea of Sally doing that to protect her baby tho,is cute) and Percy discovered in the process that he has inhuman agility and strength; so what they changed it's fine, my only complaint would be that the scene was super dark (all night scenes are) and it was hard to see what was going on,but I feel that at this point that is a Hollywood problem, so wathever

In the book,at the battle of Percy vs Ares,Kronos himself stops Ares from killing Perseus, but here it did not happen. That moment foreshadows Kronos interest in Percy because he wants to use him as a basel

Percy intelligence is heavily underused. In the books Percy constantly connects the dots and clues to figure out who people/monsters/Gods are; in addition to getting out of situations in creative and fun ways. Here there is none of that . An excellent example is the Lotus Casino. Book Percy figured out people there get trapped while he was talking with two boys who were not from this century. In the show Hermes just told him (which by the way,making Hermes own the place makes him an asshole who traps people for some reason, and as a Hermes fan it makes me angry).

While fighting Echidna, she do not have telekinesis powers or something, Percy is being chased by her chihuahua/Chimaera and he, of his own free will, decides to jump to the water showing his bravery and how willing he is to believe his dad has his back, and he is damn right! His father helped him and he learned that he can breathe underwater. All of these if missing

Percy did not speak even once with horses,that was the whole purpose of the Zebra,which also didn't appear in an episode titled "We Take A Zebra To Vegas"

The school acting like Percy is the son of Satan himself and that the best is for Sally to teach him from home. All of this because Percy drawing something so horrible,so despicable,so wicked ...a Pegasus(?) Like WTF! that the stupidest stuff I have ever seen. A kid drawing a Pegasus is not a sign of alarm,is a sign of being a kid, you fucking morons! Its imagination and creativity,and that's it,you are supposed to work with children,how can you be scared of that?! And if a kid is wondering around in the school's rooftop,that's on the school not the child. You supposed to be taking care of him,what is a kid doing there? That's your fault for being irresponsible!

They leaving Crusty free and happy,knowing he is a serial killer,wtf! All that scene was really weird in general. Percy just walked into the store without explaining how and when they found that place, how they know the Underworld is there, and they already knew everything about the store and Crusty,it felt unnatural and unearn. And in the book Crusty doesn't guard the doors to the Underworld,because why the Gods would leave that job to a guy like that? That's Charon's job

Lotus Casino (refering to the inside, the outside is really cool) was kinda boring, and they were trapped there and not go intentionally. It is tempting for children, that is why there are games for them to play. There is a waterslide, an indoor bungee jumping bridge, hundred of videogames. Here almost everything is just gambling and I know it is a casino but in the book is cooler. And there is VR games too, and that's it.

Charon, in both the books and any myth ever,would let you pass if you give him coins,so why did they change that and make him have control over Cerberus? Is a strange decision

The Underworld is supposed to have this kinda silly elements that subvert your expectations of it,like Charon loving suits, there are lines of new people(souls) arriving, and this fun banner that reads "Judgement For Elysium And Eternal Damnation. Welcome, Newly Deceased!" , Percy mentioned he could see Sisyphus at the distance. In the show we don't see the freaking River Styx! No Elysium and seeing Percy deciding that there is where he wants to be once he dies, I think that shows his character. No Persephone's Garden with her pomegranate trees. And the Fields of Asphodel (also known as Asphodel Meadows) are not a forest,are....well,meadows; I know,shocking, kinda hard to figure that out. By the way,that is another strange change because Rick knows what Asphodel looks like,that is why he represented them as an never ending field with the "largest concert crowd" with no electricity and no noise. Ah,also, missed opportunity for a Hazel easter egg

Hades is so TERRIBLE that I almost cried! Disney, we are talking about the King of the Underworld! Do you have idea what kind of creatures live there and they'll respect and fear him? In the books is important that he resents (hardcore) his family. His children inherit that as a fatal flaw. The reason is he had two children with momma di Angelo and he loved them dearly but Zeus wanted to kill them, and finally killed her, Hades only could save the children. Add insult to injury when his 2 brothers had children and received no repercussions for it. It is the reason he did not join the war against his father until the last second (thanks Nico!) . He also feel he got the worst job and he neither lives nor is allowed freely visit the cool, bright Olympus. All of it made him a cold person. Show Hades does not feel like he went through all of that, and if he did, it is like he did not care much. The writers are taking away his complexity and now he is a joke, a boring one.

Zeus was bad too but in a different way. He is just meh, did not make me feel anything in particular. I think it may be because when I imagine Zeus I picture him as a guy with beard, kinda like Santa Claus lmao and Lance Reddick (may he rest in peace,love him) looks nothing like him, so it was hard for me to believe he was Zeus. Maybe is just a me problem to be honest. Also, they made him kinda dumb because when Percy told him his dad is planing a war, he is just like "yeah I know, but right now is more important to fight your dad Poseidon" and that is extremely stupid,to be honest

[calebwittebane]

also, finished my new vegas campaign. Leigh Has Achieved Her Mission or at least the closest approximation of it that the game let me achieve, which of course is the independent ending with a full securitron army and the support of the followers of the apocalypse. the only thing is i Fackin Forgor to deal with the fiends so they caused some problems but well the trouble they caused was to the ncr so i kinda dgaf. also i was surprised some khans showed up to help me at hoover dam! i actually felt kinda bad about it like no no... ive got this... you guys have been thru enough... you shouldnt have to protect the ncr from Anyone even the legion... please oomfies stay safe....

i think some of the remnants died??? idk only cannibal johnson was still with me at the legates camp. did they die?? im so sorry arcade i think theyve died. idk how. they were in power armor shooting gods lightning at enemies. whyd they die but boone didnt. boone was with me the whole time partially because earlier he was helping me with the kimball speech mission (which btw was the most awkward thing ever. love the uncoordinated animations and the crowd of 5 people. the speech that was impossible to understand like wtf is that guy saying. topped off with every npc involved getting locked in combat/fleeing at the end. love it) and i thought hed have fun with this too. well he did and he also had fun picking up rifles off of every legionnaire corpse. why does he do that. i check on him see his carrying capacity looks weird and there he is holding 8 rifles. boy drop it. drop it. now.

anyway. i kind of dont understand what happened with the brotherhood of steel, i think i had confused the game badly. i became besties with them rather early on, i even convinced mcnamara to let me join them (which like. youd think thatd have some curious implications but again, Unfinished Game) but i never talked them into making a truce with the ncr or anything. but for some reason i told mr house i did? like right before i decided i would Not be Trying The Mr House Route after all, a decision i made specifically over his insistence that i eliminate the brotherhood actually. and then yes man also acted like the bos were gonna help the ncr at hoover dam. and mcnamara kept saying he couldnt believe he would be helping the ncr even though again the subject had not once been breached. i was like ok. and then they did not in fact help the ncr. they didnt show up. wtf was that about. lies and treachery. after all i did for you. after i fixed your air conditioning. oh im sorry, was it the robots. did you not like the robots? scared of them?

and not only that, the boomers also didnt show up even though they were supposed to. motherfucker... what did i get you bastards that airplane for... you people were so annoying and unkind and i still helped you. because i thought i could count on you. for everything i did for you. loyal i hope your solar arrays break immediately. that guy who works with loyal idr your name i hope your gf breaks up with you and then you explode. i hope all of you explode. i shouldve known. i shouldve known better.

like thats so funny. of all the factions that i had recruited the ones that actually showed up to help were 1. The Elderly Ex-Soldiers Of The Horrid American Regime 2. the great khans, Unexpected And Unannounced. oh well. we still mowed through those bastards. thats right. thats right. all you centurions and other creeps, you stood no chonce. no chonce against this hungry hungry woman. she ate caesar, shes gonna eat all of you. thats how you deal with enemies and opponents and adversaries.

as for legate lanius i fully buy into the Legate Lanius Isnt Real theory. i mean yes ostensibly theres a guy, whose name Allegedly is lanius, and hes a legate. but hes just a propaganda figure. legate lanius The Cruel Merciless Force Of Destiny Itself, The Devil, Unpredictable, Cares For Naught But Victory, with all those crazy stories of how he became part of the legion. well thats not real. hes just a tall guy in a scary mask and he doesnt really wanna be here. like the fact that you can just talk him into retreating. like hey man this campaign has already cost you your leader and youre gonna keep having a bad time around these parts. take that taste the pain. and hes just like Yeah ok Theres wisdom in what you say Youre a worthy opponent indeed. Goo Bye Bye. and sprints away. ok. scariest guy east of the colorado river you guys. had to stay holed up in the little baby camp away from any fighting until the last big battle and even then he didnt leave the aforementioned little baby camp. he wasnt leading anything or anyone. he was in his tent scared and fingering himself. scram.

felt kinda bad throwing general oliver off the dam. it was an impulsive decision and i was like man i shouldnt have done that. i barely knew the guy. kind of a gruesome way to go. sure he pissed me off and was overall a bad person but i shouldnt be doing shit like that. doesnt inspire others' confidence in my Collected Trustworthy Nature. i think.

im really glad about the good endings i got for all my companions. they just all got really chill ending slides. theyre all just kinda hanging around the mojave helping people and being cool. arcade status: chillinnnng 👍 boone status: chillinnnng 👍 cass status: chillinnnng 👍 lily status: chillinnnng 👍 raul status: ghost cowboy. veronica status: chillinnnng 👍

anyway. i had fun. and so, this concludes the epic tale of Leigh The Hungry... Leigh The Water Drinker... Leigh The Devourer Of Armies.... Leigh The Hacker.... Leigh The Dubious... Leigh The Thief.... Leigh The Sleeper, The Taker Of Naps. and what a journey it was. in a perfect world women like her would not exist. but this is not a perfect world.

[jaxrants]

Istfg

I really wanna go to bed. Like I'm practically falling asleep while standing up, but I can't because my stupid fucking step dad, and mom like coming home at 11:45 PM and expect me to still be all happy go lucky. I have to take care of your children all fucking day, and all of a sudden I'm lazy because I'm taking advantage of the little time I do have to actually lay down and relax.

But nooo, because I didn't do the dishes (just looking at the counter overwhelms me) now I've gotta stay up for the next 1 or 2 hours washing dishes.

And I mentioned, under my breath mind you, that this is the very reason why I hate being awake and all she said in response? "Well then, don't wake up tomorrow." wtf? Who says that to their kid because they're tired.

And she wants to act like taking care of her kids isn't exhausting. I wake up in the morning, surprise suprise, she's not here.

I'm so fucking exhausted. I wake up exhausted, I go to sleep exhausted. It's just a never ending tidal wave of being tired.

She ain't gotta worry about me getting pregnant as a teenager. Why? Oh because I already damn near have 2 kids. Another reason? Oh, cause I have no social life cause I've been locked in a house for five fucking years, not going to school, not having company. Nothing. I'm probably gonna be stuck here for the next three years of my life too.

I'm missing out on all of my teenage years because my mother would prefer it if I'm trapped just like her. But she wants me to be better than her. How tf can I do that if I'm not allowed to go anywhere or do anything. The only friends I have are online and the chances of me actually meeting up with them one day are slim because of just how low in the poverty chain I am. Also, aren't you supposed to use school as an easy way to make friends? I'm gonna be in my twenty's with no friends that I can hang out with because my mom decided that she just doesn't care about my fucking future, or me having healthy relationships with things.

Anytime I try to talk to her about my unhealthy relationships with things, she calls me stupid and tells me to get over it.

Mom, I can't hold a knife without envisioning mutilating myself or killing someone. I can't look at a gun without wondering what my brains would look like splattered on a wall.

I don't have a healthy relationship with food or the way I look either. I either eat too much or nothing at all. I make myself sick because I feel guilty if I don't eat all of something. I hate how chubby I am, but everytime I bring it up to my mom, or make a joke about the way I look (and this mostly happens when I'm actually feeling good about myself for once) she asks me if I really think I look good. Like..? Well, no, not anymore.

At this point, I'm pretty sure the only reason she keeps me around is so I can take care of her kids.

@purpleeggyboi @meadows-the-puppet @blooming-skeleton @im-a-simp898 @evry1h8s-me @th3-r4t-48

[keef-a-corn]

Dat’s right, People, it’s time for ‘Keef watches TFP and you just get the notes!’

This is for season 1, episode 17: Crisscross.

I write down the timestamps, but I watch Transformers Prime on Stan (an Australian streaming service) so they may be slightly off.

ALSO! I try my best to note points for every character, but tend to get a little caught up by Bee (although I think I do a pretty good job with the notes regardless) so do be warned.

~~~~Transition~~~~

00:16 - Oh dear.. already quite bored

00:41 - One thing to note is that Silas is a mix of Megatron and Optimus. He’s on the field alongside his workers regardless of why they’re there, but he also does not care who he hurts.

01:07 - Airachnid’s always gotta have a cool reveal. Theoretically. In practice it is not achieved.

~intro~

01:57 - Average day in Australia.

02:37 - OH GAWD. This again??

02:58 - had to take a solid minute to collect myself. They don’t refer to themselves as ‘transformers’ so Airachnid saying that made so much sense, but the actual word sounded so foreign.

03:03 - honestly just hate Airachnid and Arcee’s rivalry so much. There’s no respect in it and it’s not clear (to me at least) how it happened. We get back story for the situation, but it clears up even less. Why is Airachnid specifically going after Arcee?? Why does Arcee take it so personally?.

03:13 - E X C U S E M E

03:28 - let us be clear… rn Jack’s mum is hawt.

03:46 - in Speed Metal this was proven true.

03:58 - Does Jack seriously not have any other friends? The humans are so dependent on the bots it’s frustrating.

04:26 - honestly, June’s a good mum. She’s very clear and firm, but she doesn’t yell.

04:49 - uh.. that’s honestly a weird line and feels really inappropriate.

05:06 - wait, so Arcee stays the night at Jack’s place?? But she works at night too!

05:42 - that car has the same numberplate as Jack’s mum RPI • 437 if it was a background car it wouldn’t matter, but we can see the plate clear as day.

05:55 - WOO! Beeeee

06:00 - the extended part of this scene is a luxury- oh wait… oh.. oh no… it’s a filler. This is a filler episode. That’s why Bee’s there and no one else is. If Ratchet, Optimus and/or Bulkhead don’t talk during this episode, it will confirm it.

06:08 - Hehe, the contrast. Also June listens to elevator music on her drive home.

06:34 - honestly, a little surprised they hadn’t gone with the ‘Doesn’t check the room’ trope.

06:46 - ooooh The light is a ground bridge! Thought they decided to randomly add the idea that when Arcee transforms it’s a Winx like transformation.

06:54 - gaslighting 101.

07:00 - June in denial that her son’s a frickin looser and has no friends.

07:16 - Rest in pieces Jack.

07:56 - JACK NO THAT’S A BAD IDEA.

08:03 - I mean- KiNdA

08:08 - Didn’t June get off work early to cook Jack dinner?

08:40 - kinda vibing with Silas and Arcee’s dynamic rn

08:47 - WTF- seriously tho, wtf?.

09:37 - Mech is a really weird name for a group that doesn’t like transformers.

09:45 - ‘In my bed. I slept with your mother, Jack. Call me… Papa Silas.’ Would’ve made the episode 100x better.

10:10 - Wait… so the communicator scrambles the signal, so Arcee can’t reach the autobots, but as far as they are aware she’s supposed to be at Jack’s house. If her signal randomly went out, wouldn’t they notice and go looking for her?

10:25 - they had this ability the whole time but only NOW choose to use it?? If they had it set up throughout the town, they would be able to find any bot lickity split, especially if it causes them that much pain.

10:40 - Does anyone else despise the ‘they just want me 🥺’ trope?

10:51 - Arcee’s number plate is 396571.

11:26 - Oh my gaaaaawd! When will Arcee learn that she has to maintain level headed when fighting Airachnid otherwise she’s wasting her strength.

11:34 - the way Arcee’s optics tilted backwards and got big in fear, panic and desperation is a sweet choice. But how has she not realised that with Silas standing there, putting both Jack and June’s lives at risk, that he doesn’t care about them??

11:43 - bicthless behaviour.

13:09 - Calling her ‘Spider-bot’ rather than her name is both disrespectful in not using her name, but respectful in recognising who she is.

13:13 - HE SAID THE TITLE.

13:21 - The worker calls Arcee ‘it’ - entirely disrespectful and objectifies Arcee.

13:28 - considering how long it took them to simply open Breakdown’s chest plate and remove his eye, it’s safe to assume Arcee’s got plenty of time.

15:33 - what’d I say?

15:38 - he rhymed.

16:01 - what does that mean?.

16:30 - continuity.

16:35 - Awesome shot, which also captures their power imbalance.

16:40 - significantly higher. Arcee’s strong, yes. But not nearly as strong as Breakdown + Breakdown had assistance from another bot.

17:48 - why wouldn’t they have done the concrete as soon as Airachnid fell? She would’ve been less likely to have woken up.

18:31 - Agent Fowler! Proving to be useful Y E T A G A I N !

18:54 - how did he go so long without noticing that missing??

19:04 - THANK YOU! Responsible man right here!

19:07 - No. that would’ve been a good call because Airachnid’s very dangerous and Arcee cannot handle her on her own.

19:24 - that was very funny. The line was delivered so mildly, but made so much sense as well.

19:46 - They did obtain some information, so I guess Silas got what he wanted.

20:53 - MMM YES. SEXIEST MUSIC.

21:07 - Look at hiiiim

21:11 - Ratchet turns around like an old man.

21:17 - so jealous of June rn.

21:25 - Another cover poster + Optimus looked slightly offended in the moments before the shot I got a photo of.

21:28 - Not a word from Bulkhead, Ratchet and Optimus. I wonder w h y .

———————

So that was Crisscross!

Incase it wasn’t apparent, I’m not a fan of the obvious filler episodes. I’m not a fan of Arcee and Airachnid’s dynamic either, so it made the episode worse.

One thing I will give it credit for is that it addressed the fact that June would’ve started to get suspicious.

Crisscross is better than Predatory, but I don’t like either episode.

[bdslab]

Ok so now that I've finished reading Bizu it's time for me to figure out how to work Keryna back into the story… I kinda don't want to do "oh you forgot everything that happened" but if I don't want to completely rewrite the Keryna arc it is sadly required due to the bilzigs

[this got really long so it's going under the cut]

Basically Bizu can't meet the Bilzigs for the first time two different times unless he forgets about them. Same for Schnockbul and Mukes. Keryna introduces him to the bilzigs the first time. How do you work with that without completely rewriting it?

The Bilzigs absolutely have the power to make everyone forget what happened and so does Blévis Noir… I know that Le Grand Désordre was SUPPOSED to end with Blévis finding out he's Keryna's brother and going "wtf no i dont want to marry you anymore im sorry for troubling you"

Other thing: Bizu still knows Bekar even though Bekar's WHOLE STORY was "I need to get my dad back from the forest spirits [bilzigs]". He has his picture hanging in his house…. I don't think Bekar would ever forget what the bilzigs did so there's gotta be something there…

If we do go the route of everyone else forgot, Bekar could come to visit and ask about Keryna/if she broke up with Schnockbul and they'd be like "who??" Honestly thinking about it it's gotta be Blevis's fault nobody remembers anything. The Bilzigs forgot Bizu too afterall

Blevis at the wedding when Schnockbul runs up with the proof they're siblings. Instead of becoming an apologetic good guy decides "fuck it, none of you are remembering this. And to make sure none of you remember it I'm locking my sister up forever so she can't tell you"

I don't 100% recall but I think he'd been after her for a while so she'd probably remember that he exists maybe? I think it'd be nicer if she didn't forget Schnockbul and everyone so we only have to do one round of memory restoration

The bilzigs can still know OF blevis and keryna so finding them afterwards can be easier (maybe they think blevis stole her powers as the explanation for why she's powerless and also good now).

Actually I take it back, let her forget too that way she's not just locked up the whole time. IDK having her just sit and wait for Schnockbul twice doesn't sit right with me. Maybe she doesn't remember why she's powerless but knows she hates Blevis for some reason and opposes him

Maybe there's like a true love clause or something to Blevis's spell so he had to separate her from Schnockbul. IDK why the hell not who's gonna stop me.

Maybe Bizu and the Bilzigs never fully regain their memories of their time with her but when Keryna & Schnockbul lock eyes they remember EVERYTHING. Schnockbul also remembers how Ker Bizu got destroyed in the first place and that his old home was wrecked on PURPOSE

Postman shows up one day and is just like "oh you two got back together" and Bizu & Schnockbul are just like "?? You KNEW she suddenly disappeared??" and he's just like "I assumed you broke up and didn't want to talk about it?? I'm just a postman"

Blevis forced to apologize for abducting lady and nearly forcing her to marry him until he finds out their related before doubling down on the shittyness. Do the Bilzigs give him a proper bilzig punishment? Given the late bizu stories I don't see how he would escape one

The bilzigs would NOT take lightly to having their memories tampered with. But Bizu might be more forgiving since he apologized? Maybe a temporary punishment that lasts until someone actually loves him or some bullshit cause of the wedding related shit he was trying to do

hmmmm another issue is that Bekar's in le grand desordre. He could simply not be present at the wedding part? Like he was taking care of something elsewhere? Helping speedup the reconstruction of Ker Bizu?

Ok so I just reread the ending and basically Bekar walks in and sees Bizu's acting weird and that all the bilzigs are there and is confused but nobody really…. tells him what's going on? He could easily be told to go do something else while they deal with Blevis

Blevis also barely knows him, like he saw him for a minute but that's about it. No reason for him to get his memory wiped if he's not around. Maybe bekar waits for them for a while wherever they told him to go but has to leave eventually… maybe that's why he goes back

They asked him to help with the situation in the grand desordre but because they all forgot they just kinda left him there for a few years until he comes back like "hey guys what the hell happened where were you" and they're like "oh hey bekar what do you mean"

Less accidental "what happened to keryna" and more freaking out when it becomes apparent that they've had their memories messed with (maybe some visual cues that prompt bekar to pull up a book and be like "uh your minds have been messed with" followed by "WAIT IS KERYNA OKAY")

Do I really think Bekar is the type of guy to stay put for a few years? Yes. Bekar would absolutely stay put for a few years if he was told it would help by someone he trusts. Then again, maybe it would be better for it to just be one year

[nimblermortal]

I forgot what a pleasure it is to watch bad media. It just releases me totally from any need to respect artistic direction.

Netflix recommended I watch My Happy Marriage. According to Netflix, the plot is

that a girl who has been very abused (emotionally, forced labor, etc) for not having a magical gift is assigned by her dick family to marry Incredibly Prettyboy Kudo, who is from a great magical family, has a strong gift, and oh yes, just happens to be 80s fantasy levels of pretty. Oh, and he keeps losing fiancees, rumor has it they're dead.

It takes them an entire episode to establish that this betrothal is going to happen, and it takes Prettyboy less than an episode to figure out his latest fiancee is abused. They have this hilarious meetcute where he's all, "I expect you to obey every command I give. If I say die, you die" and she goes, "Oh yes of course thank you for explaining the rules in advance."

---

So in my head, they're scions of magical families whose gifts are utterly useless because the demon beings they're supposed to combat have been effectively wiped out already. They are trying to justify their existence in defending from magical attacks, but all of the magical attacks at this point are just families vying among each other for supremacy. Prettyboy as a scion takes this duty very seriously, possibly because he's inbred and not too bright, since he also takes very seriously the oath he swore never to give his father any grandkids.

The oath was in return for his own abusive upbringing, which was more on the lines of 'you're not good enough, train harder, privations' extremes, which sort of. Fell apart when they put him into military academy and he met all these other scions who are just so lazy and entitled. So he went home and killed his dad, and feels much better about life for having done so.

The oath was also because he's hella gay. He's being deliberately ridiculous about his rules for his wife because it gets rid of fiancees pretty quickly. He's actually screwing his aide - they're not in love, but the aide loooveeesss when he hears a new fiancee is coming because he gets dicked down so good when the fiancee runs off. So new fiancee comes, and Prettyboy goes, "Yep, uh huh, die if I say s- did you just agree?"

Meanwhile Friendly Serving Woman is giving every kind of wink she can manage to tell the Young Master to marry this girl, because when Protagonist arrived she gave Serving Woman a very innocent, very gay once over, and Serving Woman went, "Fan-tastic, this is the perfect woman for Prettyboy."

Side details include:

-Prettyboy cannot drive. Oh, he can keep the car on the road, but the reason they stopped by his workplace with the car? was so he could make his aide park it. He lives in terror of parallel parking. (He is in fact pretty bad at anything except magic and stamping his signature on papers.) -Every time Prettyboy tells of his aide for flirting with his wife, it's because he's having a really wtf moment about his boyfriend flirting with his platonic fiancee. Aide is of course doing this on purpose. -IT'S SO CUTE that protagonist decided to celebrate their relationship by inviting her future husband's boyfriend over for dinner -At some point they are going to go burn down Protagonist's family's house as a fun couple's outing. This will probably involve the awakening of Protagonist's latent Protagonist Magic, which is apparently going to be mind control? so maybe they'll make the parents burn it down for them. -Prettyboy is starting to regret killing his dad, pre-awakening of latent gifts. He really wishes he could summon his dad's spirit to say, "So you know how I told you I'd never give you Gifted grandkids? Well not only will I not be giving you any, but I will not be giving them to you with a woman who, herself, does not have a Gift." It would be so rewarding. Alas, necromancy is not in his impressive portfolio of Gifts. -when Protagonist's magic starts to awaken, he hopes a bit for necromancy

[theuniverseawakens347]

You gotta be fucking kidding me. You paid ppl off to not say anything and then got Malcom and Alissa and Ian and julian and CASY to hack their accounts to take back the money put it in an account for me these last..til January and then act like nothing ever happend and I all of a sudden get married to Tristan’s and start my new life … and then basel pressed a lawsuit on her and Therese bc their accounts got drained by those dummies up there Alissa siae Malcom and Ian McDowell can ATest w Julian Harrell for crypto.. whatever day I wrote about her trying to “help me get my life together while AGAIN sending me mental warfar” and I went to the psych to talk and relieve my head …that’s the day basel called her WITH EVIDENCE and she DIDNT say anything to Howard.

And then the day I came over talking about I’m on 5 spiritual retreats they all lead to ONE PERSON ONLY AND OUR FAMILY BEING TIED TOGETHER AND KNOWING OUR SPIRITUAL TRUTH.. TRISTAN❤️❤️ ..THATS the day she then what …wanted to admit the bullshit to me but then found ways to further gas light me about what my ex’s had done and then build a case in HER HEAD why I was unfit STOOPID excetera to think neffi would come back bc Daniel said she attacked his dog and he had to put her down per Lee request …so then decided fuck I gotta build a FAKE MENTAL CASE ON CASHAY SO SHE DOESNT KNOW HER FAVORITE THING NEXT TO TRISTAN IN THE WORLD IS DEAD 🤯 bruh u gotta be so fucking for real. THIS WHAT I BEEN LIVING W?? Then put the fucking crazy rollercoaster of bullshit on me …cause what I put on the blog about AFTER THE PLAY OF 44 THANK I BRODY FOR SPEAKING THE TRUTH TO ME THRU VIDEO CLIPS OF OUR ACTUAL HISTORY… 👽tology ..hit me with a “wise words of wisdom” the VERY NEXT MORNING AFTER READING MY BLOG WHILE DOING MY HAIR …then watched law abiding citizen knowing that was going to be her truth ..and the fucking psycho nurse my truth 🤯🤯🖕🏽🙂 ..reverse that. The right ones get it .. basically admit THRU MOVIES THIS SHIT IS REAL AND IM ADVENGING MY OWN FUCKING FAMILY FOR THEIR MURDER OF MADS DESTRUCTION ON HER HANDS …and then something happened w Vivicca me admitting Tristan and I been talking TELLATHICALLY .. told her I had a message / package from him cause she was suppose to turn me over to him by then and didn’t decided to send me to Vivicca to let someone else care for me while she cleaned up her fucking mess.. but me saying me n Tristan been in communication and HOWARD backing her up saying no you had not just what ..fuel for more fuck shit to prove I’m crazy and she’s sane 🤯🙂🖕🏽 that’s retarded as fuck Lee. I CLEARLY FUCKING KNOW / KNEW. And ur FURTHER helping me prove EVERYTHING I OUT ON THIS BLOG. Alissa morris did some fuck shit to Lee garlington and wants to get back at her…they in a weird tit for tat …Alissa got her government official computer breaking into our house and Alissa did all the nudes to the White House the day vivcca and I came over to speak to her and Howard ABOUT THE INDUSTRY TRACKING / SHIT BOYFRIENDS that came by way cause Lee + Alissa fucked all of them ..so ur telling me Alissa is a miniature terrorist w Aja and they’re getting back at u w Tony .. THIS AINT TRUE AT ALL U LYING ASS SHIT. U PAID THEM OFF TO DO THAT DUMB SHIT W MALCOM AND THEY ALL TOOK PARRT AND IAN WAS THERE TO KNOW THAT U THREATENED THEM ALL W BIG MURDR CHARGES OF PAST MURDSERS .. like wtf kind sense does that make Lee . UR A REALLY WDIRD FUCKING PERSON IN THE HEAD AND UR STILK HOLDING ME HOSTAGE BC U LEGITIMATELY WANT TO KILL ME OUT OF THE FACT THt u WONT BE THE LFIRST LADY IE KAMALA HARDIS .. sorry fucking the spelling. This sooooo childish u gotta be fucking kidding me … and yall nighas say i got adult issue ain’t no fucking way this what’s been going on in ur brain and u just been keeping cool.. or this bitch real life lost her rockers when I started awakening the first day she seen me at st Francis psychward .. the condition in which I was in.. this bitch really made At herself for failing as a fucking mother when she worked sooooo hard to prove she’s a good mother .. like what was the point of the planned breakin .. that’s what happens when u don’t know pol in yo circle .. u got extra weirdo ppl around u looking for a hand out u gon say someone Ian took over and did things his way to prove I’m not fucking crazy and ur a shitty ass fucking mom because nighas been watching this blog and watching me on my fucking growth ..so u know Howard paid these ppl off to stop the fuck shit but nighas h4_eazy still did the weird shit and stole my laptop til Ian told him put it back then stole Howards.. that had child pornography on it of me as a minor .. ALISSA IR FUCKING WEIRD U TEO CONSPIRING RN W MALCOM AND NICKI HOW GO GET OUT OF THIS SHIT INSTEAD OF ADMITTING YAL ON WEIRD SHIT .. as pissed off and upset as I am w Howard rn Zfor not STANDING ..

[neon-in-the-night-time]

oh god memorial day weekend was so chaotic this year, everything was a clusterfuck. friday and saturday were so chaotic but i barely remember what happened then bc everything sunday overshadowed it wtf

family drama and rants after the cut… also a content warning for mentions of blood

my sister and i woke up at 7 am on friday in order to beat the traffic (we couldn’t go down thursday night like our parents and my mom’s older younger brother did bc my sister had a concert). i decided to take advantage of the house being empty of my parents to look in the “witchcraft shed” to see if my mother had hidden any of my possessions i didn’t know about (my mom in the last year has gone on a crusade against “witchcraft” and after i left for college she took anything she deemed witchcraft and shoved it in this shed so that the witchcraft wouldn’t be “tainting” her home) and a few things that i knew i didn’t take with me to college but were missing when i came home weren’t in the shed (most notably the giant 6 foot wide 4 foot long spider me and two of my friends built in high school that was meant to be aragog from h*rry potter that i keep not bc i like harry potter (🤢) anymore but because he’s a giant spider and i always take him with me to sleepaway camp to decorate the unit bc he adds ambiance and also the matching smaller spiders that i made that i hung from the rafters are gone too). but what i’m most mad that she hid in the shed is this little canvas painting of a corn snake that a camper made for me 3 years ago… that goes on my camper fanart wall! that was a gift! how dare she!

anyways me and my sister rescued the shit we wanted to rescue (including the cd of the live action little mermaid soundtrack) and we went on our merry way down to the shore. all was well, we didn’t run into any traffic on the way and we got dunks for breakfast. my mom’s youngest brother was also supposed to come down on friday, and he was supposed to drop off his 13yo daughter (my cousin) at his ex-wife’s house bc it’s supposed to be her weekend. my cousin is not happy with this seeing as she has spent the first 12 memorial day weekends of her life down the shore at our beachhouse with her dad’s side of the family and the last 3-4 years since the divorce it was always her dad’s turn during mdw. my cousin had been trying to convince her mom to come down so that she can come down too and spend the day with her cousins (mainly me my sister and our two cousins who are our age (19-21)) (there’s no one her age on our side of her family). this is unlikely as her mom has not been to our beachhouse in 7 years. my uncle is trying to communicate with my aunt (ik they’re divorced but she’s still my aunt in my head idk) and trying to coordinate dropping off my cousin with her but she is not responding. he ends up taking my cousin with him down the shore. my cousin keeps complaining to me and my sister that her mom would rather go do yoga that spend time with her. the gist we are getting from the cousin is that her mom does not want to have her that weekend for whatever reason and our cousin is not happy about it. she eventually comes down saturday afternoon (without telling any of the other adults apparently. just her daughter. which my uncle (her ex-husband) and my mom were not happy about). it was extremely awkward for everyone

i don’t remember if anything happened saturday. i’m almost positive something happened but i don’t remember after the chaos of sunday

so of course the day starts at 8 am to wake up and go to my parents’ new church that’s totally not a cult… it was whatever. i’ve been zoning out during church sermons since i was like 12 so i was a pro at this. i think up gay fanfiction during the entire time. on the way back to the beach house from church i sat in the backseat of the van (a spot that i have had claimed since middle school for whole-family car rides bc not only can i zone out whatever my parents and brother are arguing about this time but i get praise for how “selfless” i am for taking the backseat, which i suppose technically has a little less legroom than the other seats). we’re on the exit ramp from the garden state parkway to get back to [town redacted]. my parents are arguing, my brother is loudly complaining about something i guess, idk, i was reading fanfiction on my phone. i was not paying attention. i am, however, paying attention when my dad rear-ends the big pickup truck in front of us on the exit ramp, which is very crowded because it’s memorial day weekend. my mom starts to yell at my dad for being reckless. my dad steps out to talk to the guy in the pickup truck. luckily for us the truck isn’t damaged, just a small gash on the front of my mom’s minivan. my dad and the guy in the pickup dap each other up (or at least i am told that’s what the gesture was after trying to explain it to my cousin). my dad gets back in the car and we start driving back to the house. my brother starts yelling about something. i don’t remember what. my mom’s still chastising my dad for driving recklessly (the pickup stopped very suddenly it would’ve been hard for my dad to stop on time). my brother continues screaming as my parents ignore him. my mom declares that we’re having “quiet time”. k-love is playing faintly in the background. my brother is not happy that we’re still playing music during quiet time. my mom wins.

also on sunday my mom’s older sister and their dad (my poppop) are supposed to come for a day trip. now the thing you need to know about my poppop is he is very old. he has dementia and he has a large number of health problems. the backs of his hands and forearms (which are normally the color of a very tan italian-american) are speckled with black. i don’t actually know why this is. he has difficulty with walking, but refuses to use mobility aids. he also isn’t allowed to drive anymore, which is why he came with my aunt. his skin is apparently really really thin (this is relevant). the plan was initially for everyone to go out to lunch at this one seafood restaurant we always go to. usually we go saturday night when the most people are here, but poppop wanted to go, and because he has been going there for decades and is friends (?) with the owner, his kids were willing to indulge him. my aunt and my poppop get there while my mom’s older younger brother, his wife, and their two sons (the aforementioned cousins who are me and my sister’s age) are down at the beach. my sister and i text our cousins saying “hey pop’s here you guys wanna come back so we can go to [seafood restaurant]?” but no. apparently poppop and my aunt want to go to the beach first. also poppop wants to go to the restaurant for dinner. everyone except me and my mom seem fine with this. before he leaves for the beach, however, poppop asks my mom if there’s any beers. she’s trying to get out of getting him a beer. i’m not sure if she was genuinely concerned for his health or doing her weird “i am in this world but i am not of this world” judgey thing again. she asks if i can look in the outside fridges for pop. i do not pick up that she does not actually want me to get him a beer, however, i thought that my uncle’s beers that he had were in bottles and not cans so when i saw the beer can on it’s side i thought it was a soda can. “sorry pop, there’s no beers in there” “uncle [redacted] must have took them with him to the beach”. my dad gets him the beer, as he also did not pick up on the fact that my mom really did not want him having that beer (she ended up being right on this one tho given what happened)

it is agreed among poppop’s kids that we are going to show up at the restaurant exactly as it opens at 4 to put our names in so that we can get poppop back home to pennsylvania at a reasonable time bc he’s old and they’re worried about his health. there are 9 people going to the restaurant: me, my sister, my mom, my mom’s older younger brother and his family, my mom’s sister, and my poppop. my dad and brother are staying back bc my brother has a ton of allergies and is eating on his own, my mom’s youngest brother and his kid left in the morning. me, my sister, and the cousin that’s my sister’s age are sent on foot to put our name in and the other six come a little later in two cars. we put our name in, we get our table, all is well. we’re waiting for about 5-10 minutes and then our aunt (my mom’s sister) comes in. she tells us that poppop fell coming out of the car and he’s bleeding heavily from his head and also his knee. she says that poppop is insisting we don’t call an ambulance. my sister and i, who are first aid/for trained and certified, say abso-fucking-lutely not, especially at his age. we tell the server we’re forfeiting our table and we walk outside to see what’s happening. when we walk out we see my mom had the same idea as us bc she’s on the phone with 911. her siblings think she’s overreacting (she’s correct to do this). my older cousin (my age) and his dad are pressing paper towels against poppop’s head to stop the bleeding. the restaurant owner (who is friends/familiar with my poppop and is also very old) and his daughter and granddaughter (who run the restaurant) are outside too (this is where they got the paper towels) (they also got a large bag of ice but it wouldn’t help much in the situation). the police arrive, ems not long after. at some point my mom has me call my dad to update him on the situation. ems gets pop bandaged up and on a stretcher in the ambulance. my mom goes with him in the ambulance, and the adultier adults (my mom’s brother, sister, and her brother’s wife) follow in one of the cars. once my older cousin has washed his hands of the blood (biohazard), my mom has the four of us drive her van back home. our cousins’ mom gives us $40 for dinner.

we drive hack home, we give my dad another update, we eventually get dinner at this italian place on the boardwalk that used to have really good really cheap pizza but has kinda fell to the wayside recently and is hella expensive now but it’s possible for me to eat there with my gluten thing which is what really matters. poppop is in the hospital until 9ish at night, the adults are arguing whether he should stay the night in the hospital, stay the night at our beach house, or drive back to pennsylvania and spend the night at home. staying at the hospital would probably be best but he really doesnt want to and the hospital discharges him. by now the other adultier adults have agreed that my mom was right to call 911. it’s decided that poppop is going to stay the night at the shore, which is an issue because the fog is really thick and we’re on the second floor of the house so he’d have to go up the wet, outdoor stairs to get up here. also because with him and my aunt staying over, we are slightly over capacity when it comes to beds. when he gets there there is a team of about 5 people surrounding him making sure he doesn’t fall again coming up the steps. nobody can agree on the bed situation, nobody is happy, at some point somebody tries to convince my sister to sleep on the trundle bed. it’s a mess.

also the whole time all this is happening my parents and sister are arguing about my sister’s birthday/her birthday gifts and my mom is being all uppitty about the fact that she doesn’t drink alcohol

[bookofthoughts1]

some people were just shitty friends. And I’m just glad they aren’t in my life anymore. Yet somehow they still find a way to talk crap, fuck with my life, get involved somehow, and cry over me thinking they were shitty. You were tho 😐😐😐 I literally felt like shit around you like 95% of the time…. other past friends that I just grew apart from were so much better. But few. Very few were: Rude, one… a total bitch tbh. Surprised people are still torn up about me and how things ended. Don’t pretend you were some angelic friend. No way. I often questioned my worth around you, being amongst “friends” I shouldn’t feel that way. At least with my new group, and some that I still choose to talk to after many years of friendship, I’m always reminded of how much I’m loved, how important I am, never judged. Glad I kept some of them around.

Literally was made aware that some chick wrote a novel about me. Apparently she knows my tumblr which is strange considering I only shared this account to one other person. I know that one person would not have given her this info. So that’s pretty disturbing how she even knows. That’s a stalker. Like really how did you get this tumblr account? Probably going to make yet again a new blog account. Cuz fuck 😐 can’t ever post in peace without people getting access to my shit somehow someway. Actively involving herself in my life but denies doing so… yet she talks to my ex, apparently she had given permission to MY ex to talk to me, and even came over to kick my ass over MY ex, she even became friends with other people I had a falling out with recently!! She literally hit them up just to talk shit about me. She doesn’t admit that now does she? I blog and post about people? Ok? Because I can. No one looks at my tumblr anyways except these low life stalking ass bitches. And Rather than clear shit up? Clear shit up with who? Her? Eww no. There’s nothing to resolve between her and I. That friendship was over a long time ago. She’s the one that needs to clear shit up within herself because it seems that she’s so bothered about my single opinion of her being a fucked up friend. All she shared was the good of it. Didn’t mention any of her faults. Too bad for her I think she’s awful cuz she was. I’m just one person so I don’t get why my opinion bothers her so much. Especially considering we are not in each others lives. Maybe she changed? I don’t know and I don’t care. Yet I’m such a fanatic, like sorry to say I don’t give a fuck about her. Not in the slightest. She’s dead to me. Wtf am I supposed to clear up, anyways? She was a toxic friend in how she treated me. There’s nothing to clear up. She’s the one that made shit real public on Facebook. I supposedly made a post about her a few days ago. She somehow managed to get access to that post and claim it was her. Uhh flatter yourself why don’t you? And again, this blog of mine was private af. ONE PERSON knew about it. One. And I know that best friend of mine wouldn’t share this blog with a single soul. So I’m hurt and I need help? Nah. You’re hurt. You’re hurt over the way I viewed you. Something in you just can’t own up to being a bully of a friend. If you have something to tell me then tell me. But there’s literally nothing to clear up. Are we trying to resolve shit that happened between us? There’s nothing to resolve. Did she forget she literally came to my house to try and beat me up? Tf? Get out of here. Trying to get pity or something? Literally admitted you’re outspoken and confrontational….. confrontational… that’s like admitting you’re a bully. Being honest and telling the truth is different from being outspoken and confrontational. Telling me I dress weird, making fun of my weight, disrespecting my mom, saying I dance funny, made fun of my looks with her boyfriends, criticized the 3 men I dated in my life, said one of them was ugly but decided to be his friend afterwards, pushing me to move on from my ex to someone new and the moment I did find someone i actually liked, it wasn’t to her standards, made fun of a tattoo I had gotten with another best friend of mine. But she doesn’t admit that. Lol. This all stems from her thinking I wrote about her in one post I made when in fact I wrote about someone else. (Some old old old lady someone’s ex that keeps hitting me up for money.) so this chick, an ex friend is Crying over how she was actually not a bad friend? But she was. Constantly judged me and put me down. On the daily. Made fun of almost everything about me. Criticized my decisions. Never supported me at all. Just all judgments and criticism. Literally haven’t hung out with her since April of 2019. And the way things ended was dumb af. I literally just decided to drop her and never hang out again and that was honestly one of the best decisions I ever made. I had other friends and family tell me how awful she was to me too and how I better not ever go back.

I don’t understand how it’s so hard for her to move on with her life? Because of my own personal thoughts and opinions. You’ve made it clear I’m dead to you. So I basically just don’t exist, so again how does my opinion of how I viewed you during our friendship have so much of a hold on you? And How is it called bad mouthing? What I said is the truth. None of what I wrote here is a lie. (And yes, this is about you, but that other post wasn’t. You don’t know what I go thru on a daily or the weird messages I get from different past people regarding money.) it’s all the truth. Or did you not treat me like shit? Did you not make fun of almost every little thing about me? Did you forget how fucked up you were to me? Never raised me up, never told me I’m beautiful like my current friends do now. How long was I supposed to endure that and just be ok? And I wasn’t friendless. I had a best friend when I met you. I had different friends thru out our friendship too that you simply didn’t like. Gtfo with your lies.

I’ll be making a new blog. A whole ass new one because stalking bitches managed to find this account. Why can’t they just leave me alone and not waste their time in looking me up?

[marcusrobertobaq]

Wasn't related, was an old gripe of mine. It's supposed to be superficial, i'm making a joke about "them going supposedly known as 'human' roles of mother and daughter (even tho ain't exclusively human) in a way Kara decides pretend Alice is a human this whole time just to fulfill this role and Alice, just wanting to be loved, to be what she wanted to be (a girl like the other girls) - where she tried everything to be the perfect kid any parent would want but all she received was a big NO, as if she were doing everything wrong, her function wrong, her sole purpose...wrong - she happens to go into this 'play house' with Kara, even tho after some point in the story things start to 'to crack' (at least for Alice) cuz the game throw hints all the fucking time".

I know it's a consequence of 'em turning Alice into an android and not wanting to remove or change the whole core of Kara's story, but this change is significant and impact the perception of the player - often in a negative way, especially when it's stated that Kara was aware of everything...cuz it's the superficial level: Alice being an android makes everything less HEAVY, less IMPORTANT cuz she's an android. Mfs gonna get that "everything was a fucking waste of time but we're here" kinda bullshit.

Androids are supposed to pretend having these roles, but not something true - as the propaganda in the universe says, as Kamski says "I understand some people may be fooled but they'll never be alive". After all in this universe this kinda thing is stated as "fake" and only someone "deep down in the fantasy" would go thru - which is something that happens and that's why many mfs are replacing humans with androids cuz they're perfect for the role and realistic enough to make it feel "real". It's used in many negative ways, no wonder they had a deviancy boom. But...wtf is "alive" and why there's such a bullshit and some much of a concern about this topic? Cuz androids are fake - people needa remind of it every fucking time so they don't fall for this shit even if they needa slap androids in the face, destroy 'em, call 'em "it" and say every 3 minutes "you're a fucking machine" in pure anger on how they're so fucking realistic, so "human" but...fake, perfect imitation, a replacement (for many).

But what the story wanna show in superficial levels: that some stuff ain't exclusively human, that androids can have TRUE relationships still being androids, sometimes totally outside of the standards or even "what it's expected from an android in dbh society" - that's why I'll always joke on the "become human" thing. I'm shitting on being in the superficial level where u gonna have takes like "wow, androids are...acting like people, like humans!", "empathy is a human emotion", "they're alive like humans, they have feelings like humans", "deviants are showing humanity". These are literally the type of dialogues npcs have in the game.

They ain't becoming human, being mother and daughter ain't supposed to be "become human". It's more about the role Kara and Alice are trynna be for one another - in the way in the universe is considered "human" and they seek this relationship but not in the "fake-androidy" version CyberLife sells but something genuine - even if it falls into 'em "original purpose" kinda shit like mfs around say. That's the irony. See how mfs always question they both being deviants just cuz they're up in this role? That's what I'm making fun of.

Unfortunately some stuff is sold as "something human" inside the game. What's the best way of not feeling out of the box in this sorta propaganda, being a normal family in the propaganda? Copying humans, having human's roles - like mother and daughter - so the "only way" they would ever be real mother/daughter 🤭 is by "pretending to be human really hard"💅🏾 and going deep down in this fantasy ✨. They want what humans have - a normal life 🤗, cuz that's what the fucking TV says, the media says, the internet says, the people on the streets say and do 💫✨. U got a "ANDROID" written on your clothes and LED? 😳 No, let me get back to the rules 🥴: Humans = genuine 💞, Androids = fake, replaceme--

No!

In this specific game, in this specific story I don't buy this propaganda. To not see only the surface mfs gotta sit down and observe stuff thousand times, back and forth, until u got shit right and what the writer really intended to do.

And i'll admit something: I don't know jackshit about what Cage wanted with this whole bullshit (Kara and Alice's lore), I haven't read anything related - full interviews, books - nothing. I didn't buy a single extra bout this game cuz I live in a beautiful country and I'm fucking rich. And that's where the majority gonna stay, after all the name "David Cage" is quite infamous in storytelling world. Will end up as a "pile of stupid junk" and scaring mfs away, "why do i gotta take that mf seriously? It's a nonsense, a joke".

I still looking for some shit so good take. If u can link me some stuff I'd be glad.

Sometimes I get worried I'm letting Kara out of my rants but really her story is more about domestic violence stuff and how androids try lying to themselves so they feel like fitting in the world - in this case "becoming human", a horror story about acceptance - but not exactly only about yourself but the fact what the others want shouldn't be what u want. Cuz that's what Kara's and Alice's journey became after they changed Alice's character.

I feel like mfs say Connor's story is the best one cuz it got lotta makeup. Few people gonna get some refs and really gonna sound like an average sci-fi game instead of touching sensitive subjects like Markus and Kara's story does. And also got the dynamic with Hank that is basically a comic relief.

I got some bad news...nobody is free from caginess.

[natashas-wh0r3]

Okay so I decided that since my professor wanda story is doing really well i’d do a part two, here you go, enjoy my horny friends.

Pt. 2) Wanda Maximoff x Reader (top wanda), switch (kinda) dynamic this time.

Disclaimers: smut (obv) oral w fingering(r receiving), thigh riding (r giving), little bit angsty, legal age gap, teacher x reader.

trying to do first person :)

As soon as the classroom door shut behind me, I realized what actually just happened. Holy shit I fucked my teacher. This is so bad, but it was so good. wtf is wrong with me? All of these thoughts running through my head. I realized I had a gap today between Ms. Maximoffs class and my history class much later in the day. So I decided to head back to my dorm, all the way there I thought about her. I swung the door open. ”ZARA GET IN HERE”, she practically slid over the countertop trying to get to me. “what what, wtf is going on”. I sat her down and told her EVERYTHING, from beginning to present. “So you’re telling me you got railed by your teacher and if it wasn’t for me it wouldn’t have happened.” “i guess you’re right but shhh, let me have my moment.” Just as I finished my sentence I heard my phone buzz in my pocket. I pulled it out and looked down. “Email from Ms Maximoff” it read, “oh shit”. Zara yanked the phone from my hand, “OPEN IT BITCH” she said slamming the phone back into my hands waiting in anticipation. “Okay alright”. I typed in my passcode tapping the mail icon on the home screen. An address was all that was included. 195 Westview Ave 97305. “is that her home ad?” Zara asked. “How am I supposed to know?” i ask. “we’ll go find out,” “I don’t think that’s a great idea” she rolls her eyes. “Just go for it”. “Okay why not”. I grab my car keys walking to the elevator and head towards the car park. As the elevator descends I put the address into my GPS. “only 2 miles away, atleast I wont be using a lot of gas.” The door opens and i walk to my car hopping in and backing out. Shorter than I realized I was at her house, or atleast what I think is her house. Just as I park the car I see the front door open. A man and three kids walk out followed by Wanda. Are those her kids, is she married!?!? She hugs the kids and the man as they hop into their car and drive off. I don’t know how but apparently I grew balls and went up to her. “oh hello y/n, I see you got my address.” “yes uh Ms. Maximoff-“ she cuts me off “Love, please call me Wanda.” “Sorry Wanda, who are those people, they aren’t your kids… right?” she chuckles “oh no that’s Clint my close friend and his children. I felt the weight of the world lift off my chest. “hon, theres no need to be worried you have me all to yourself.” She lightly cups my cheek pulling my lips to hers. The soft sweet lips I had only kissed about a few hours prior back on mine. She slowly pulls me inside guiding my back to a nearby wall. She pulls away biting my lip before releasing. “I wanna eat you, right here, taste that sweet little pussy of yours.” Involuntarily a moan slips out from between my lips. “yes mommy” is all i can mutter up. She goes straight for my neck kissing and sucking at the tender skin while guiding her hands down my torso. Her gentle, cold fingers moving towards the hem of my sweatpants. She unties the loop of the strings and slowly pulls my pants down kneeling as she does. God she looks so fucking sexy on her knees. She lifts one finger and places it on my clit causing my body to shudder. “my god baby, you’re so wet.” “Please… please mommy” she hooks her finger around my underwear pulling them aside. Before I can even prepare myself I feel her warm tongue on my pussy. She starts circling my clit with her tongue holding onto my thighs as she pleasures me. If i thought she was good with that fake dick she’s even better with her tongue. “does that feel good moya krasavitsa?” “Fuck yes please don’t stop” she moves her tongue farther down prodding at my hole. My body in full bliss as this woman pleasures me. I throw my head back, closing my eyes as she moves back up to my clit, I don’t even have time to ask for her tongue in my hole when I feel her cold finger enter my pussy. “OH FUCK” my knees nearly buckle out from under me as she keeps licking and sucking at my clit. “oh you’re such a slut, you wanted mommy inside of you huh?” I can only respond with incoherent moans. She pulls away from my pussy keeping her fingers in me. “Use your words detka” she says reaching

her other hand up to pinch my nipple. “yes, y-yes i wanted you inside my pussy, please please make me cum mommy.” Wanda let’s out a deep moan before throwing her tongue back at my pussy licking even faster, her fingers working at much harder into my aching cunt. my hand reaches for her hair as my orgasm builds in the pit of my stomach. Loud moans escape my mouth bouncing off the walls as I grip onto her hair for dear life. The sounds of her sucking up my wetness making my pussy throb. “you gonna cum whore?” she says driving her fingers into my soaked pussy. I open my eyes looking down to see her fingers covered in my juices. “yes yes please harder.” Her fingers rapidly move in and out of me, my walls clenching tightly around her fingers. Her other hand moves up to my clit rubbing it in tight circles. That’s all I needed for my orgasm to plow through me. “MOMMY” I yell as my thighs tighten around her hand. She slowly being her fingers to a halt pulling them out. “let me clean you up detka.” She sucks all of my cum into her mouth standing up and opening her mouth so I can see it on her tongue. She seductively stares at me closing her mouth and swallowing it all. I grab her face and pull it towards my lips. My tongue pushes through her lips eager to taste myself on her tongue. I pull back, “Now it’s my turn to please you, show me to your room mommy”. She continues kissing me as she guides me to her room. As we enter I pull away closing the door and turning around to see her stripping. God does she look so fucking beautiful. I do the same leaving my clothes all over the floor. I walk over to her now naked guiding her to the bed and pushing her back onto it. I get ontop of her immediately latching my mouth onto her nipple while massaging the other breasts. “Fuck you love mommys tits, is that right?” I just nod my head moving to leave hickeys all over her. I lean up grabbing her shoulders and flipping us around. “Ride my thigh mommy, use to me to cum.” she moans at my request. “My little baby so eager to please me.” she says while straddling my thigh. She lowers herself down I feel the warm wetness of her pussy on my thigh. Her hips begin rocking back and forth as she leans forward to gain better stability. Her ethereal moans begin leaving her mouth as her eyes shut. “mmm that’s it baby, such a good fuck toy” the bed begins creaking as she picks up the pace. I lean up attaching my lips to her neck and massaging her boobs. “yes don’t stop” she moans into my ear. I can feel the throbbing on my leg as her pace becomes violent, her juices running down my thigh and onto the sheets beneath us. “What do you want mommy?” I ask wanting to bring her to her orgasm quicker. “mmm fuck, suck on my fingers” I open my mouth inviting her inside. She temporarily opens her eyes to guide her fingers into the warm destination. I close my lips around her fingers sucking and moving my tongue around them. A loud shaky moan leaves her smooth lips as her thighs shake. She’s close, my hands grab ahold of her hips and I tense my thighs rocking her harder into me. “OH FUCK CUMMING” her body shakes above me, my eyes locked on her boobs as they rock with the motions of her hips. Her jaw drops as her orgasm waves over her. Her warm juices now all over my thigh. I stopped guiding her hips and slowly laid her down ontop of me . “You’re so hot mommy.” “that was the best orgasm Ive had in ages” she says through pants. she crawls up to embrace you pulling the covers over both your bodies. “Sleep detka, you deserve it”

Please let me know your opinions on this and if I should write a series!

[drberkes]

f*ck

Ok hi so I (12/2/22) am going to force myself to write now because the amount of anxiety is unacceptable and I have tentatively identified not enough writing as a possible source. So here we go: if you’re expecting a nice eggplant dish, please manage your expectations. I am going to do my best. I may just hand you a f*cken eggplant and tell you, “Best of luck, I’ve done all I can.”

Ok so how did I get here? I tried writing about it a bit for my Technology Awareness paper I wrote for Natalie, but that paper was just for fun and I’m not proud of it (there were swear words in it). Hmm…let me tell you about Anacortes, like I told one of my nurses when I was in the hospital for ten days back in May. My Aunt Barb and a friend she had liked for a long time decided to go on a road trip together. My Aunt was agreeable with everything her friend wanted - no audiobook, weird climate control requests, fancy bathroom requests, everything - even agreeing to go to Anacortes against her own judgment. She wanted to go to Port Townsend where they would have had no shortage of restaurants by the water to enjoy. They got to Anacortes and discovered that unless there is a festival, Anacortes is a sleepy little port town with not much going on. My Aunt spent her time there in the quilt shop, making the best of it, while her friend went off to get a tshirt. So they wound up in Anacortes with nothing to do and only a t-shirt to show for it. This journal entry, written in December (December!) is the same t-shirt from Anacortes. And the agreeableness I’ve described here is just the tip of the iceberg for her trip. Boy, let me f*cken tell you… …like I told everyone at the ketamine clinic. I was supposed to be tripping balls during my extremely expensive infusion and getting an abundance of insights from my subconscious but I spent the last half of it babbling to my doctor about everything that I haven’t written about yet - all the people I tried to help and how it almost killed me. I’m seeing four paragraphs now so I’ll take that as a sign that I am probably going to survive. BUT *********@#$%^, WTF. People people people are just people, people, people (Brown). And chronic stress prevents our writing/reading/learning brains from getting online. Less writing, more stress. It’s enough to make you crazy if you let it. Anyway, I have no idea where to begin inspiring you with the extremely horrific dumpster fire that is my mental health and how I got here. So I’ll start with you. If you’re reading this, you are probably a person. What does it mean to be a person? I wish I could bust out one of my papers and tell you what I think, but hellfire in the form of a dozen pieces of garbage masquerading as people rained down on my f*cken house. I’ve had windows broken, death threats, graffiti across the street (“f*ck you” written on the curb). All because when people get pushed in the wrong direction, they make bad decisions. They decide they want to go to Anacortes. For the record, I want to go to Port Townsend. But I’ve already been there. Thanks Aunt Barb! 🙂 What was Port Townsend supposed to look like for me? Let’s circle back to the beginning of the pandemic. Kameron was out. So I’ve just spent a couple years at a community college and got sent home like Isaac Newton. What am I gonna do? Study Calculus? Write 100 papers? No, I’m gonna try to help Kameron. And Clay and Cameron and his girlfriend Missy and Brynn and Robert all at the same time. This where we’ll lose some definition...there were so many encounters there where I tried using my AS to push as hard as I could in the right direction. The outcomes were mixed: Kameron went back to prison, Clay moved to NY with Jeff, Cameron and Missy had to move also, and I worry about Brynn. Robert is doing better and has a job now. Why did this f*cken happen? Because they needed more help than I could give them. Lesson learned: you have to identify if someone is doing well enough for you to help them otherwise they will just pull you down too. It is not their fault. I suppose you get to be a certain age and you’ll get weird looks if you still act like a child, but I digress. These folks are good people who wound up in bad situations because of forces beyond their control. That reminds me of what my Uber driver told me when I came back from Portland right before (AM)^2 started: “...they’ll eat you alive.” But if someone is heading down a path where they’re gonna end up in a bad position when they’re older and I can do something about it, how can I choose not to act? How can I sit there and protect myself when there is work to be done? Now we’re getting into Tara Brabazon.  Anyway, this all sort of came to a head when I lost my job, checked myself into the hospital, got out and promptly had a tiny, tiny relapse which actually improved my PHQ-9 score considerably. But ah, now Tara Brabazon is reading this I’ll just head off to watch some of her videos. I feel better already having written something. Yay. Why did I lose my job? Because if I try to show up I’ll get probably get arrested. Why did this happen? ...and reason 546 is because I wasn’t prepared. I didn’t take care of myself well enough. And I wasn’t careful enough. I built a gun that shoots live piranhas and aimed at my fucken self.