#I was like awh man no not diesel

[etchif]

Stex brainrot is real just watched a documentary about a railway system on some swiss mountain and got genuinely upset for a second when they mentioned the original steam train was replaced by a diesel a few decades ago and is now entirely electric

[mamirhodessxox]

Unpublished prompts from HTD

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*Randy & Mira trying to plan Cody & Delilahs bachelor & Bachelorette party.* “He said he didn’t wanna go to a strip club or out of town. “Delilah says she doesn’t want those male stripper magic mike like dancers either so I don’t know what to do at this point” “They’re so fucking boring and in love at this point just has Cody come to the bachelorette party as her personal male stripper or something.” “Randy how else do you think Delilah got pregnant. He’s already a personal male stripper.”-Randy & Mira

“Delilah if your gonna have a bachelorette party you need to learn how to throw your ass.” “Mira I don’t have a butt made for tha-“ “BULLSHIT”-Mira, Delilah & Cody

“I’d rather choke on acid tabs than look at another womans oiled up boobs.” “Ok so what if I dressed up as a stripper and you looked at my oiled up boobs.” “Randy is there something you need to tell us?”-Cody, Randy & Seth

“Delilah the woman that you are” *Delilah in a night gown from walmart* “what..”-Cody & Delilah

“I realized I have Daddy issues & Mommy issues.” “I kind of gathered that when we first had sex Lilah.”-Cody & Delilah

“Seth?” “Yes?” “Can you stop fucking breathing it’s to loud & irritating”-Mira & Seth

“LEARN HOW TO FUCKING DRIVE YOU DICK” “Mira calm down you just got your drivers last month you are NOT vin diesel.”-Mira & Seth

“Guys I think Delilah’s pregnant” “how?” “You shouldn’t even be asking that when you know her & cody go missing ever 3 hours every day & 2 she just cussed someone out at target.” “She never cusses..” “OH MY GOD HE GOT MY SWEET ANGEL GIRL PREGNANT.”-Seth, Jey & Mira

*Everyone on a cruise* “Hey Cody.” “Hi…” “I like this cruise idea it was smart.” “Oh thanks.” “It’s a perfect way to get rid of your body if you piss me off.” “Oh.”-Mira & Cody

“The oceans so pretty!” “Beach sex.” “What?” “Beach sex.”-Mira & Randy

“I always knew Randy had a fat crush on mira. Isn’t that right Bunny?” “You call me that one more time I’ll rip your fucking ear off.” -Seth & Mira

“Guys where’s Mira?” “Adopting a parakeet” “FUCK”-Randy & Jey

“Here is our almost too emotionally and psychically attached couple that loves each other so much.” “Your so cute “no your so cute!” “And here’s our mildly toxic couple.” “I WANT MORE ATTENTION FROM YOU” “I ALREADY GIVE YOU ENOUGH ATTENTION WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?” “MORE ATTENTION!!”-Seth, Cody & Delilah, Mira & Randy

“So is seth the top or bottom in his marriage with becky?” “I’d rather not know.”-Randy & Cody

“Ok guys I’ve been teaching Delilah how to stand up for herself a little better let me show you. Hey loser” *Delilah on the verge of tears* “hey man..don’t call me that!” “Did I just watch Cody try to bully her like this is disney channel?”-Cody, Delilah, Becky

“I love you.” *Mira coming back after zoning out* “huh?” “I- uh I said I’m SELLING you.”-Randy & Mira

“Awh look at them their play fighting!!” *Mira trying to slap a spider off Randy’s head from the distance* “CAN YOU NOT TARNISH MY BRAIN CELLS PLEASE?” “I’M FUCKING TRYING”-Delilah, Randy & Mira

“Hey Cody?” “Yes gorgeous?” “Do you like me?” “I literally proposed to you twice Delilah.”-Delilah & Cody

“Would you love me if I was a worm?” *Randy trying to sleep* “Mira it’s 3 in the fucking morning go to sleep.”-Mira & Randy

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@alyyaanna @jeysbvck @kabloswrld @mini-rhodes @southerngirl41 @femdisa @claymoresofinfamy23

[emmyrosee]

Axel coming home from a night out completely shitfaced and waking you up to tell you how much he loves you hehehe

It was hard not to wake up from the loud clomping of boot steps down your halls to your shared room, the occasional stumbling and quiet “awh shit”’s in tandem with the knocking of furniture being the only indication that the intruder was your boyfriend and not a threat. You weren’t mad, far from it actually. It wasn’t uncommon for Axel and his employees to hang out after work and drink, getting their sober friends to drive them home.

You fight the chuckles that want to bubble from your throat at his struggling, and you watch as next to you, Diesel raises his head at the jiggling of the door handle.

“Baaaaabe,” Axel whispers rather loudly, slowly stepping into the bedroom. “I’m homeeeee.”

Like you hadn’t noticed.

You angle your head slightly to watch him make his way to the bed, stripping his clothing off as he continues to speak, “sorry it’s so late. Pat showed up with nips and a broken heart, bro code says we have to sss’pport him.”

“It’s alright, handsome,” you assure, sitting up with a yawn. You flick on the lamp on your nightstand, “you got home safe, that’s what I care about.”

Axel smiles widely at you, flopping down on the bed in his boxers, wife beater and socks, nuzzling between you and Diesel childishly, “I knew you’d understand... s’ good to me.” His eyes are closed, his smile dopey, and you assume he’d already fallen asleep as you reach to flick off the light next to you.

“I love you so much, m’ baby,” he mumbles into your thigh, lips pursed out from laying on his cheek, the flushed areas of skin making him look childlike against you. “The best thing that ever ‘appened to me.”

With a grin, you gently lift his head and scoot down to have him lay on your chest, placing tentative kisses to his soft, greasy hair. “You smell good,” he mumbles, burying his nose deeper in the crook of your neck, smiling enough for you to feel his mustache grate over your skin.

“You stink,” you snicker, making him whine in protest. “You’re showering tomorrow.”

“Not gonna make me tonight?”

You smile and shake your head, “I don’t think you could make it to the shower right now, baby.”

He giggles squeakily before nuzzling deeper in your arms, cradling him and rocking him softly to coax him to sleep like the child he seemed to be at the moment.

“Mkay.”

“Get some sleep, handsome man,” you whisper, closing your own eyes to get back to sleep. “We’ll clean you up tomorrow.”

“Mkay.”