#I want a spork!

[yanderedrabbles]

What happens when the Yandere state trooper finds out y/n is pregnant?

(❤️)

Oops, looks like you're stuck with him.

Yandere Cop - Baby Trapped

Yandere! State Trooper might be an asshole, but he's not an idiot. You've been avoiding him.

Yandere! State Trooper who puts an alert out on your plates and is the first one pulling up when they get called in. Who plans to draw this out for as long as possible and think of your pretty lips on his cock the whole goddamn time.

Yandere! State Trooper who sees you flinch when he shows up at your window. Who can't hide his annoyance when you keep avoiding his eyes. Who raps his baton on your car door and snarls at you to look at him when he's talking to you.

Yandere! State Trooper who asks you to kindly step out of the vehicle and when you do, he's grabbing hold of your upper arms, digging his fingers into the flesh and pressing you between him and the car.

Yandere! State Trooper who wedges his knee between your thighs and scraps it across your clothed cunt.

"Why're you avoiding me, hmm?"

Yandere! State Trooper who watches you go pale, trying to shrink into yourself like that will somehow make him go away. You claim it's nothing, you just haven't been out much.

Yandere! State Trooper who shakes you like a ragdoll and snaps that you're the shittiest liar he's ever met. And you spill your secret in a stuttering rush of words.

You've missed your period.

Yandere! State Trooper who carefully presses his hand against your lower belly, his mind going a mile a minute. There aren't any other men in your life, he's made sure of that. So it's his, without a doubt.

Yandere! State Trooper who smiles slow and lazy. Do you have any idea how expensive kids are? Were you really going to manage with a job, a single income and kids?

Yandere! State Trooper who finally has you in a position where you can't possibly say no to him.

Yandere! State Trooper who knows more than anyone how tightly binding the law can be. And when you're his wife...well, the law has and always will be on his side.

"Tell you what dollface, why don't you come over and we can pick out your ring together?"

[sporkberries]

Metal Gear Lore

[frenreyfire]

kindly check the attached LOVELETTER coming from me.

(sketches under cut)

so i read Y2KVR over a month ago and i liked it. this drawing is basically my benrey design in a modified benrey Y2KVR outfit bc i couldn't find a reference. and every benrey drawing turns into my benrey design, even when im trying to draw him more on-model. his hair was originally supposed to be IN the helmet, but i liked him better with the hair and i love having fun lalalalalaaa.

i don't really 100% like the 1st piece, but i don't want to look at it anymore and there's some things i like about it.

anyways, sketches! i like spork's design. spork is fun. i also like all of their designs, but especially spork. i need to actually draw gordon.

[esthyradler]

When your friends are better scientists than you are

[kaelidascope]

“I can’t believe we got you to dance all night with us!” Sun crows gleefully as Blake approaches. Neptune cheers, and as one the newlyweds surge over to her: framing her from both sides as they kiss her cheeks, hugging her between their held hands. Blake hopes Velvet caught that; she’d love to have a picture like that for her desk. Something to zone out at when the words won’t come and she’s half-convinced no one’s actually fallen in love, ever—that no one ever truly feels that deeply.

An inspiration.

A goal.

---

Velvet may not have captured it but Chef Kaeli certainly did! For @professorspork <3 Who so graciously made my job coming up with a birthday treat so much easier with this suggestion

Read this fic guys it's INSANELY cute and I was squealing the whole read. It's a short lil thing c'mon guys if I can shotgun this in one morning you can too. Give her some love, she is an absolutely hidden gem of an author and so far every work I've read of hers is excellent.

Also it's like her birthday so like yeah go on. Off with ya, go read. Comments are crack for us and we are shameless addicts

[welcome-to-roomba-fazbender]

@weirdozjunkary / @sonicexelle-junkary​ 

@lazy-charlie / @chuck-the-fanboy​

@clownsuu / @not-robert

Characters In Order:

Chuck The Fanboy/Chuck The Beaver

((Owned By Lazy-Charlie/Chuck The Fanboy))

Charlie The Cursed Phone Guy/Charlie The Cursed Weasel

((Owned By Me Of Course))

Bedlam/Bedlam The Jackal

((Owned By Weirdozjunkary/Sonicexelle-junkary))

Robert The Cannibalistic Phone Guy/Robert The Polar Bear

((Owned By Clownsuu/Not-Robert))

Chork The Confetti Bitch Clown

((Owned By Me Of Course))

Spork The Confetti Bitch Clown

((Owned By Clownsuu))

Ronald The Confetti Bitch Clown

((Owned By Lazy-Charlie))

This Is The Official New And Improved Height Chart For The Mobian AU.

Featuring Three New Editions!!! GASP

(They have been referenced on tumblr before, but now with this mobian update, I hope to make The Confetti Bitch Trio more blog relevant outside of this au too)

Thanks to Max for getting this done, none of this would be possible without him.

Reblog's Help Spread This More!

Also This AU Is now officially blog canon, completely.

[partrin]

matsuoka rin i want to eat you

[miniimoose]

https://www.instagram.com/p/CCha6ddglOz/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==

Human disguise Spork and Miyuki

these are so good!!!!!

Instagram Link

[thelemonsnek]

[id: two versions of the same digital drawing. It depicts several drawings of a Torracat named Spork. In the first drawing, it is sitting with its tail wrapped around its paws, looking off to the side. In the second drawing, it has its paw over its mouth as it smiles mischievously, with a sign pointing at it saying "do not trust". In the third drawing, it stretches, yawning. In the final drawing, it is bounding away from someone with their wallet in its mouth. The first image has a yellow background with blue accents, and Spork is drawn in typical red and black Torracat colors, while the second one has a black background with blue accents, and Spork is now neon. End id]

Tried out a new brush and I am THRILLED

[dozenssporks]

combining the two things I talk about on this blog: Murderbot would hate Vash the Stampede so so much.

MB's self-assigned job is to keep human(oids) from dying from stupidity and then there this guy *gestures at Vash* whose entire goal in life is to be as stupid as possible in ridiculously dangerous situations.

MB doesn't have a stomach but it's getting stress ulcers anyway

[doctorspork]

You're the dumpster fire extinguisher. Good luck.

my boss, when I said work was a dumpster fire today

[sowearecleariamhere]

Ramble-y impressions and thoughts from my first watch of Arcane S2 Act 2

This is all I took down in my notes app, it is vaguely proofread

Of course - spoilers ahead!

Episode 4

• The beetle fight??? "We used to play a game, imagining bigger and bigger monsters" and not Jinx is playing that game with Isha T-T she is doing what she learned with her big sister with her new little sister! (Also might be some easter egg?? Feels that way?)

• ISHAS BRAIDS 😭😭😭 THE SIBLING ENERGY I AM CYRING

• I didnt know I needed big sis Jinx in my life T-T

• "She was more into... hitting things." - we dont see her face 😭 - ... "Someone put all these holes in you." - she tends not to address herself directly when it is a painful memory

• The shot of Jinx's crazy eye overlapping with Cait's in the magnifying glass (? Or whatever it is) goes crazy

• Ambessa to Cait: "You'll never rest knowing that she's out there" She's referring to Jinx, but maybe also to Mel since the Black Rose has her

• Jinx "talking" to Silco... T-T It's like she is waiting for her hallucinations to talk to her, but now they wont... maybe bc Isha is good for her? Stabilizing her?

• Singed holding a scalpel... not a differnt type of knife. Not ominous at all.

• Not her hallucinations back again, WITH Silco now that Isha was taken T-T

• BROO that warwick montage in red??  Looks so good

• Not jinx calling sevika "Lefty" xD

• Jinx's "look at this doofus guard" look at sevika

• "You look like a half-eaten circus tent" NOT THE SHADEEEE

• Not the smiley face on her middle finger "nail"

• "Whoo! Biiiig mama." (About sevika) Warden knows whats up :3

• Jinx tensing up as the prisoners approach her. She is only accustomed to being met with disdain and violence. Never has she been confronted with a group of people accepting her, being happy she is here, acknowledging her, revering her, touching her as if for good luck. Would not be surprised if this is some kind of turning point for her. That she realises she isn't alone, even if she can't know them all, but they are on her side, they (sorta) have a united cause. Or they can. If she chooses to participate. Bro I am bawling

• She is so visibly uncomfortable, she doesnt even know how to begin to react to that

• And the brothel leader too?!! Her being like "It's okay kiddo, you'll be fine, you’ve fought so hard"

• Isha crying in Jinx's arms, making Jinx cry, making me cry

• Gate shuddering, red smoke. Me: "Daddy's home~" xD

• J: "Get her(isha) out!" S: "You really are-" J: "Big fat hero." ..."It was something I could fix" callback kinda

• Not sevika being a stand-in for Vander carring Isha(Vi) away from a killing field (jinx/jinx and Vi's parents)

• I thought, is he gonna recognize his adoptive daughter by her trinkets, since she has grown up and aside from her hair colour she changed a lot... and that is what happened ajshdkakajdj

• And now Jinx doesn't really want to Die, she is crying even though she stops fighting back

• "Powder?"

• That is evillll

Episode 5

Oouf here we go

• Yesss get ready to be destroyed by Vi once again Lock!

• Vi I love you and your hook alshdkskda

• Former enforcer dude is like "That's my girl"

• Vi is shattered now too, she has a broken mirror, just like her sister. Also signifying once again that she has lost herself, is lost, does not know who she is or what to do

• The sister "talk" ? I was waiting for lets gooo

• Jinx "Vander... he's alive" ..."nothing ever stays dead"

• Crazy how at this moment, Jinx seems more mentally stable than Vi

• Minor point. Love how Caits hair looks in the cloak. Being the leader of a fascist military state has to have *some* upsides at least

• Cait you have fumbled your girlfriend AND your marbles

• Vi is *spicy* now. And by that I mean a bitch (not that I don't understand why)

• Also her eye makeup slaps. Her eyes look so pretty omg

• Mel casually unlocks some mechanism... Mel you smart devil

• The sisters looking at their dead father's things T-T

• Two estranged sisters that hate and love each other in the lair of their fathers who were brothers that hated and loved each other

• Vi reaching her hand out to comfort Jinx but retracting it T-T

• J: "If he(Silco) found this (Vander's letter to him), everything might have been different." The parallels tHE PARALLELS... also "What could have been" might as well start playing

• I swear if Isha dies I run amok, I will go berserk

• Young silco has the same fringe thingy as Jinx!!!

• Vander gives Felicia JINX'S CUPPPP

• DO THEY BOTH LOVE HER???

• singed said he hadnt found the right catalyst to vanders/ww mind yet

• What if it is Felicia/Vi??

• "Blisters and bedrock" !!!!! That is where vander and silco got their phrase from

• Is that why they wanted to establish Zaun? For her kids??? 😭😭😭 omg crying

• Omg it hit just hit me what if that is why silco hated vander? (One of the reasons at least) Vander took her kids in. And that is maybe why he (Silco) took powder in?? Because she "defected" too? From vander? Am I big braining or smooth braining rn??

• V: "What's the point if we cant raise an ankle biter or two?" HE IS CORRECT WITH THE TWO, ALSO THE ANKLE BITING xD I would be surprised if Powder/Jinx wasn't at some point biting her father figures

• But they really did take care of them!!!! Omg unified theory???

• "What are you waiting for? He's your dad too" crying screaming omg 😭😭😭😭

• The hug omg <3 I didn't think we'd get this T-T but I know what comes now will destroy me

• Viktor/Salo: "I suppose this is somewhat beyond what we left off." YA THINK.

• "I'm sorry you feel that way" what in the therapyspeak

• DAMN JAYCE. Didn't know it was pancake day. We have storebought you know

Episode 6

• "Ask for a miracle healer, get a metal fortune cookie." xD i can't

• BRO. I never thought I would hear "Powder" out of Viktor's mouth goddamn

• Vi: "What do you think?" Jinx: "You... actually want my opinion?" she sounds so disbelieving T-T

• The monage of Vander's memories has me sobbing. Ugly

• "What if we stayed?" "We?" 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

• "Evolution has a destination. Not to combat nature, but to superceed it. The final, glorious evolution." HE SAID IT, HE SAID THE THINGGG

• Ngl Viktor's hair is beautifulll

• You just tackle your ex-gf like that Cait?? No hello?

• "Dont sugarcoat it, Cupcake." ....*sobbing in the distance* ouch

• "We tracked some sort of new chemweapon down here. A bloodthirsty murderous beast. What are you doing here?" "... Trying to save... my dad."

• Are they gonna scheme? Please tell me they are gonna scheme

• Jinx: "I had some time to think lately. Ever since you dropped into my life, it's like I put on glasses. Except I can't tell whether everything's blurry or clear." What did I say, Isha stabilizes Jinx's mental state <3

• "Being patient. Mm, still haven't quite cracked that one, but being tied up sure helps." *wheezing* your honor I love her

• "Don't. Touch my daughter!" Screaming. I love that we see Vander protecting Powder/Jinx <3

• Viktor looks as Jayce and his eyes are the color they way before...before he became arcane Jesus

• The screaming is horrifying

• Vander is crying, you're crying, I'm crying

• Them fighting side by side T-T this cant go well

• The montage 😭😭😭😭😭😭

• Isha is crying, Jinx is cying, I am crying, throwing up scratching my eyes out

• Stop it. Isha being like a AU powder, where instead of if being an accident and chaotic, she wields the power she has with a target. Self-sacrificing.

• AMBESSA. She said "Sacrifice" FUCK. HIE DID I NOT CLOCK THAT

• Istg if Isha is dead. I feel so bad for both of them, bc their relationship was so obviously healing for both of them. Only to have it ripped out from under their feet in the most cruel way

• Writers when I catch you it is on sight

• How am I supposed to wait a week?? How can it be over in a week????

[sporkberries]

Oh to be an awful teenager during the early 2000’s…

[sergeantsporks]

Hey, @localcanadiancryptid22, I know this probably didn’t seem like a big deal to you to say, but this is literally the first time anyone’s ever said that my writing looks pretty in a lifetime of always getting told that my handwriting is bad, so I’m going to explode and cry. Thank you

[mittensmorgul]

A brief description of my cats when it's time for treats:

Virgil: you tossed it right in front of me? a disappointment but i shall eat it. oh ho ho! you tried to trick me and throw it past me! i got it anyway! where shall the next one land? i shall destroy it no matter where it lands!

Spork: mother, that treat landed two inches away, i have to assume it's not for me. (i nudge the treat closer) oh thank you mother i thought i might perish from lack of treats

[drwcn]

tbh I don't know wtf is happening on wheel of time half the time but everyone slays in their costumes.