#I think the dichotomy of the intermittent fights to the actual good shared house experience after truly awful ones makes fights ickier

[saltyvsparrow]

Humaning is hard, or how I realized I had been avoiding masking fatigue by maintaining a modern hermit lifestyle

For the majority of the last 20-ish years I have lived alone. Having sufficient income to afford this has been my greatest life luck, and was something I always dreamed of when I was a teenager.

This post started off in my mind very differently. I guess this will be a draft for now, so I can organize my thoughts around my feelings. I have these great moments of clarity that are so quickly lost to the fog of refinement that I can't just turn around and go back to where I came from.

But this was supposed to be about communicating with the first housemate I have had in 13+ish years, and how I hate feeling like I need to mask in the home I own to accommodate her and avoid pointless arguments that should never occur in the first place.

Anyway, what it all really boils down to right now is that I am thinking of telling her that I feel like there are times when I am responding with examples of similar issues experienced because I am attempting to demonstrate my sympathy through similar experience, but she responds as if I am the village idiot because my similar story is not a 1 for 1 match, and maybe we would have less potential for prickly feelings if she would preface her stories with "I just want to vent" so I can know in advance and respond accordingly.

Note: I also hate having to think about this and figure out an action to take because these instances make me feel really icky, and doesn't actually feel like a solution that just isn't a glorified "heads up need you to mask on demand because I don't like this trait you have."