#I suppose there was maybe like one I liked but it isn't like blorbo level like

[temporalmystusions]

I think it says something about how much I like a Kamen Rider show by how much I want to draw it. I've had an image of Ace I wanna draw all day and earlier in the week I wanted to draw Michinaga. Things I want to draw for Ex-Aid are always cropping up in my mind (or writing which reminds me I need to go note something down lol) I wanna draw more stuff for Build and draw some things for Ghost too, but... Gaim. Nothing comes to mind for Gaim.

[utilitycaster]

Were people mad about Marion x Sean not happening? I know it was popular during episode 1 but I feel like by episode 2 most everyone saw the writing in the walls with Marion and Jean obviously being into each other.

A refreshingly small number, honestly! It was one or two people in the main tags and maybe one or two more who said obnoxious things in the tags of my posts. I used that as an example because it was fresh in my mind and because that was genuinely such a great line in a fantastic arc in a fantastic series that closing yourself off to it is a miserable prospect.

Here is the thing about writing on the walls: there is a level of shipping where people will openly ignore it, eg: literally everyone who claims Beau and Yasha "came out of nowhere"; basically anyone who focuses extensively on microexpressions because that frequently goes hand-in-hand with ignoring Character A and Character B kissing each other in favor of how Character C blinked a millisecond too rapidly in A's direction; etc.

This also, honestly, isn't limited to shipping, though that's the most common case where I see it. I think part of why Campaign 2 hate is so bitter at times is because there are genuinely many, many people who watched all 141 episodes and who loved almost everything in 140 of them and then hated that the finale did not bring back Molly or did not have the ship they thought was "supposed" to happen appear - I was there, and people who claim Campaign 2 sucked were there too watching along throughout the whole thing; they just definitely thought the couples would all break up and rearrange in episode 141 for no apparent reason.

That's really my larger point: I think there is a certain kind of person who tells themself how a story "should" end, whether it's a particular ship or a particular story beat, and becomes furious when the story - which never made that promise - fails to deliver. Not only did Candela pretty clearly signal that Marion and Jean were into each other, it also told us inherently within the story and in literally every out of character interview that this was pretty much guaranteed to not end remotely close to any sort of happily ever after. It's funny - earlier in campaign 3 there was a lot of flack towards some fans' (of which I was one) frustration with the story on the basis of narrative/pacing, and I still see the inane "must stories have conflict" argument pop up. But those same people who get mad at those who talk about inconsistent themes or characterization or awkward pacing are, more often than not, people whose assessment of a story rests entirely on the incredibly narrow "did I get the exact ships and plot elements I wanted out of this and was my blorbo the coolest guy ever all the time," rather than the broad and inclusive "did this story capably deliver on an interesting premise."

[tethrarisms]

Ahem. This post will probably age poorly but my mind won't stop being delusional so here are some thoughts I gathered regarding the future of jjk.

*spoilers till ch. 237*

Gojo: although it pains me deeply to say this, I don't think Gojo is making a comeback. Was the fight fair? To an extent, yes. What really displeases me is the fact that Sukuna only achieved his full form AFTER Gojo's death. Like, I give 0 fucks about Kashimo, dude lost to the pachinko guy. So it doesn't sit well with me that Gojo wasn't the one who cornered Sukuna when he was considered the strongest since day 1. Outrage aside, Gojo had a certain level of closure when "meeting" his friends in the afterlife. Gege killed Nanami for way less (when he came to the conclusion that Nanami reached his peak as a character and thus wouldn't have anything else to add to the story -- which I disagree but let's not focus on this). That means that the story can't go forward with Gojo being the strongest while Yuji is the protagonist. Did he have to die? No. He could have got free from his "curse" (being the strongest) by having his powers erased or something. He'd still see his dream come true by having his students take down the conservatives of the Jujutsu system (which is actually kinda blurry now that the world knows about curses and sorcery but eh, anything can happen now, maybe a cursed technique like Pucci's Stairway to Heaven). In conclusion, I'll miss my silly blorbo but that's the end of the line for him *cries*

Nobara: BUT! Have you realized how Nobara wasn't in Gojo's afterlife? In addition, I'm still clinging to Nitta's words: "It's not a zero percent chance, okay?!" When confronted by Yuji about her status, Megumi doesn't reply, but we know he's a guy of few words when it comes to feelings. Besides, Yuji had been through a LOT (more would come, ofc, but not the point), so it's possible that Megumi was protecting him by not giving Yuji false hope. All these clues lead me to believe that Nobara is in a state of coma, still healing from Mahito's blow. She isn't done yet, she has a promise to keep and she's not one to give up so easily. Nobara has the potential to return. And speaking of which...

Megumi: Poor little guy's soul is literally trapped in the void while the demon who possessed him without any consent has reincarnated in HIS body. I see many fans discussing that only his soul can be saved BUT something has caught my attention. When Megumi asks Hana/Angel if her technique can revert possessed players to their original players, she replies that it's not impossible, but it's extremely likely they will die because the cursed object and the body fuse. "It's difficult to strip one away". Okay, so it's hard. But there's a chance, especially assuming that Megumi's soul is a state of suspension. That keeps Megumi and Sukuna "separated" to an extent, meaning that maybe Hana can rescue his soul and heal his body after Sukuna is destroyed. Not to mention her role as a "divine" figure. If she can pull a jujutsu called Jacob's Ladder, why not a Lazarus' raising?

And those are my delusions predictions. Gege is really a cruel, heartless storyteller, but it's not fair that Yuji keeps losing people he loves over and over. I still have some hope that this story isn't just deathbait for shocking value. I know everything changed after the Shibuya Incident, and still... Yuji is not supposed to die alone. It's the very motivation of his character. So let's bring some comfort back, right, Gege? 🔪 *threaning aura*

[tiredassmage]

can we hear more about in dreams, hopes to die... 👉👈 those lines are so tasty..

CHOMPING AT THE BIT, AYE AYE CAPTAIN!!!!

Would you believe me if I reveal that this snippet is from the same piece? It's obviously an overall not very good time kind of piece, so I felt a tiny bit bad about it for once and decided to throw Tyr a bone. Valkorian and Tyr's own conga line of bad times couldn't be the only thing in five years worth of dreams, I figured, lol.

Also, that very scene is where the banger In the dark, it’s easier to hide and easier to tell the truth came from, lol.

Don't get too excited though because that's... very short. And also it's mentally set to Eyelids by PVRIS, so uh. It still punches me in the face.

Eventually I'll hopefully throw him another bone and give him and Theron's time on Rishi or Yavin IV a little pass because I'd like to think Theron's at least a little right and something came up. And stars know Tyr needs a fuckin' break, good gods almighty anlkfdnafldsf. Says she who continues to put that man in Situation after Situation after Situa-

And it was very hard to stop at just the first line for that initial post because the three lines that follow it are the meat and potatoes of what is currently the opening sequence of what I hope will eventually be a coherent fic. Or at least kinda coherent. It's still a very nebulous piece and I kinda like that, so I might not really do much more setup because it seems fitting that there wouldn't be a lot of setup and transition in something like the carbonite dreams era.

And, perhaps unsurprisingly given the nature of the setup of that chapter, but a lot of these scenes flirt with the concept of death. Tyr's dangerous dedication to "finishing the job" isn't anything new to those of us who have been here a while, lol, but this is a good character study piece if you're newer to my favorite blorbo, though it's an undeniably heavy one and obviously a bit fucky and nebulous by nature.

Also, fair warning, yes I'm giving you lines, but also I am going to give you a ramble and a half about Tyr lore because this is the piece I'm stuffing some juicy tick-tock workings into because I realized it was good for that and I love my boy so much, he's so fucked up. I love him though.

Anyway, I teased, so the next three lines of that scene, as foretold beneath the cut:

At first, it’s a firing squad. Mud cakes their boots and the rain pelts heavy on worn, drawn faces.

Tyr pushes to his feet unsteadily. A flash of lighting breaks overhead, glancing off of leveled blasters and hollowed eyes.

It will end as it should: without a soul remembering his name. He’d prefer it that way.

Okay, so... this is also not necessarily a piece I intended to write, but I realized there is... almost no better place to do a deep dive into some of the things that tick inside of Tyr that maybe aren't best portrayed in dialogue alone. This also wasn't meant to be in present tense, but it didn't feel right in past, so I ended up caving and that's... been a theme of the week, I guess, lol.

This is also like. I always chuckle a bit in that scene from Visions in the Dark later where Valkorian threatens you to meet his challenge and grow stronger or die alone and unremembered because wouldn't that just be ideal for a former Cipher. Wasn't that how the story was supposed to end? He didn't ask for your bullshit, grandpa.

There's currently two other scenes I have - they're all relatively short as I try to keep with that sort of drifting feeling. But the other one that might [Large Eyes Emoji] be of... relevant interest...

What’s been done has already been done. It doesn’t matter what it was. Maybe it won’t matter to anyone else.

Because it’s going to end here and now. Such were the decrees of the Sith - of the Empire.

Absolutes.

It matters to him that he tried. This is one of the kinder ways this could go - quietly, without the fanfare of blood on his teeth and a fire in his eyes.

“For what it’s worth, sir?” Nine exhales long and slow as he closes his eyes. “I’ve always admired you… You did your best.”

Finally.

No.

More.

Running.

“But I’m not going back.” The old man’s one of the few he could ever hope to ask this final favor. “Finish this - what we started.”

The Minister of Intelligence pulls the trigger.

It’s over before Tyr feels the ground beneath him.

Also topical given the "are others concerned about their sleep schedule" tag post reblogged earlier today, lol, and the idea of chronic nightmares. That Tyr and I haven't talked about. To each other. Or the world. Possibly not with the people he cares about, either. I'm sure Theron knows nebulously that he can have some troubled sleep - you don't share a bed with someone and not notice how consistently they have trouble falling or staying asleep.

But I think the fuckiest part of the whole Castellan Restraints period for Tyr is how he doesn't want to let the old man down. The Minister is more a father figure in Tyr's eyes than his own father, quite honestly [Tyr has a... kind of non-existant relationship with his entire family, unfortunately - and it's not because he went into Intelligence], and there's absolutely a part of that dynamic that is mentor and protégé.

And it's important to me that he sees this scenario with the Minister and not Shara - at least in Chapter Two, where it first haunts his nightmares with some consistency. Because I made a conscious choice in Shara knowing as Keeper about his Restraints - not because that ever comes up in-game, but because it adds something very crunchy to their already doomed narrative. And the background to that decision is that I decided it's... the kind of silent acknowledgement that the Minister can afford to give of their more intimate relationship. It's damage control, mitigation. With a heavy heart I imagine he tells her this in private, off the record, because Nine was her Cipher. And both of them still hold him in high regard.

Nine's given a possibly unusually loose leash to pursue the SIS investigation because of the Minister and Keeper's word; Watcher Three mentions this in broad strokes when he questions you about the blackout in records.

Anyway, the point to me mentioning this is actually that Tyr makes a very conscious effort to not think about this in the midst of the Restraints causing problems. He's reluctant enough to cede that he should hold the Minister responsible for this gross violation of his privacy and trust, but he's even more reluctant to give that the woman he loves has any knowledge or hand in the process - unwittingly or, especially, wittingly. Ultimately, he stubbornly doesn't hold them responsible. It hurts less to place the blame elsewhere. And he never loses the inescapable nostalgic kick to go home in the sense of the old paradigm - him and Keeper and the Minister.

He gave them everything.

And there's something in here about his regret at not being able to say all of this respect in better words or more directly. There's that acknowledgement that there's one person he trusts to understand why this was his breaking point. And, ultimately, there's the acceptance of the likelihood that none of this is going to end well, that he's living on borrowed time stolen from fate or destiny, or hell, maybe the Force. Tyr doesn't give a whole lot to whatever higher powers might be out there - relying on them hasn't ever saved him and he doesn't expect it to.

It makes it very interesting to watch him knowingly and willingly lie about the Black Codex after he lets Ardun walk with it and promises to double for the SIS. In a way, he's committing the greatest failure and throwing away everything the Minister has fought so hard with him to maintain and keep, especially when both of them have spoken of ideals instead of goals, etc. But it's necessary. It's what's best for Tyr, mentally, at that point. And even one of the figures he loves and respects the most can't override that desperate intrinsic need to fight for himself. The old man is, after all, one of the largest advocates of it throughout his career as Nine.

And, I suppose speaking of the nostalgia for Intelligence, my favorite set of lines from the final scene so far:

She’s sobbing against his shoulder. Dust and blood stain an almost unfamiliar uniform - he hasn’t worn uniform on Dromund Kaas in months, maybe years…

Everything’s been such a blur since Intelligence was disbanded…

so YEAH. I uh. I have a lot of feelings and this is where I'm sniffling and sobbing and word vomiting them into one doc but in story format, I suppose, lol.

Also completely unrelated to this particular fic but I am. Still thinking so intently about Eight x Tyr thoughts. They're now living rent free in my head and all of this.... absolute devotion stuff... hrhrhghghghghghghghrhhg. Brain vibrates because this is obviously all related to it because of the few people who could ever possibly understand any part of this series of events and feelings, it'd be another Cipher.

Tyr really does mourn Intelligence like... ghhghg. I'm unwell about it. He gave everything to it and its success. He doesn't regret it. The SIS investigation and the following fall of Imperial Intelligence were some of the worst fucking years of his life and it's destroyed him, really. He's living in and with the ruins like a bombed out city. It destroyed his everything and he'd almost gladly let it finish the job and destroy him to finally get his retribution. And he'd just as gladly let love destroy it all and rebuild it from the rubble when he has the right person beside him. Something something doesn't realize that he doesn't want or need to continue that destruction, he just needs fucking... idk validation or something. Acceptance. Acknowledgement. And then they can work on what "okay" looks like in the aftermath. He needs to be just as responsible for someone else's "okay" to even begin figuring out what the hell it looks like for him. hOUgh anyway.

I'm fucking normal about Cipher Nine, obviously. Thanks for comin' to my TED Talk.