#I sprung out of bed and doodled this in twenty minutes

[pixelguzzler]

sometimes self care means giving your doppelganger sloppy.

[just-jordie-things]

Like She’s Mine (part seven) - Stiles Stilinski

this is like.. part 6b lmao warnings - swearing + mentions of sex + sorta shortish

“So tell me something y/n” Stiles mused.  I think that we’d successfully sat on the floor silently for twenty minutes.

“Okay” I said, picking up the baby monitor next to me and playing with it.  “Like what?”

“I don’t know I just want to talk” 

“Alright then um... tell me more about GWU I feel like I don’t know enough.  Got a special girl waiting around back there?” I asked with a short laugh.  He almost laughed, but I heard it die in his chest.

“No, no I don’t really have anyone there.  I pretty much just float around classes”

“No friends?” I asked, turning my head so my chin set on the edge of his shoulder.  He didn’t say anything, I just watched him as he looked down to the fingers he played with in his lap.

“Nah I prefer to just um... I just like the way I have things going now” 

“Yeah? And how’s that?” He turned to me, causing me to lift my chin off of him so his nose didn’t bump into mine.

“Get up, I have my own dorm you know, I usually check for notifications but if there aren’t any I get ready for the day and head to school.  I have morning classes but my mid afternoons are usually free.  Maybe another class around threeish..” He shrugged his shoulders.  “Then later I’d call or text with you before bed” I smiled at that, and he looked back at his fingers.

“How do you not talk to anyone throughout the day? You went there for a whole year-”

“No not anyone, I text you did I not just say that?” I linked my fingers around the monitor, shrugging weakly.

“I guess I mean I figured you’d talk to somebody” 

“Nah”

“Well... in a selfish way that’s good” I said.

“Oh?” Stiles raised a brow at me, and I felt my cheeks heat up.

“Yeah I mean... now maybe you won’t find better attachments there and leave the rest of us behind” He turned to me again, staring intently at me.

“y/n- that- that’s ridiculous” His brows furrowed and I looked away again to avoid eye contact.  “Nothing’s... I’m not gonna- Nothing would ever make me want to leave you behind” I smiled for a moment, but then quickly changed my expression back to a neutral one.  “What?”

“Hm?”

“That look, what’s that look for?” 

“I don’t know what you mean” I said shrugging it off and staring at the monitor some more.  I saw him lick his lips out of the corner of my eyes.

“y/n-”

He was cut off by the baby monitor going haywire, screams and cries I heard through the radio and from just down the hall.  I sprung up, yanking away from Stiles and rushing towards Madison’s room.

“Do you need-”

“Thank you but no, I need to do this on my own she’s very- just stay there” I said, putting my hand up to Stiles as he’d begun to stand.  I entered Madi’s room, finding the girl crying on her back.  “No, no shh” I cooed as I walked over to her, lifting her in my arms.  “Come on, come on let’s look at the stars” I said in the happiest voice i could muster.  I carried her towards the window, showing her the view.  But her cries continued.  I winced as fat tears rolled down her red cheeks.  “Sh sh sh” I pointed out the window, and she turned to it.

The loudness of her crying, which I was grateful for.  But here and there she’d whimper of take shaky breaths.

“I’ll drop and speak a charm, take the weather from your heart” 

Now, I don’t know when I’d realized singing calmed her down, and god knows how I was good enough to make her relax but it it.  So it was something I stuck with when she’d throw her fits.

“And the weight from your toes..” 

The melody was soft, and I sang it in a mere whisper as I bounced her just barely. 

“Burn the bed and the dreams I’ve never met...”

Her eyes began to close and I smiled softly.  Slowly, I began making my way to her crib.

“Those wishes were never for granted”

I laid her back down, breathing a soft sigh in relief as she stayed sound asleep, body calm again.  She did look like a little angel.  After assuring she was comfortable, I kissed her forehead one last time.

When I went back out to the living room, Stiles had his back to me, laying out a blanket on the sofa.  I just stood there, wrapping my arms around myself.

“Sorry we used to have another bed” I told him, and he turned to see me.  “If you want you could always just sleep in mine and I’ll stay out h-”

“No no, it’s fine” Stiles said, shaking it off.  “I don’t mind the couch.  You know it’s my prime napping place” I chuckled and nodded.  I was going to tell him an old story about how I’d always walk in on his naps.  But my eye caught something glittery on the table.

“Hey, we never opened your present” I said, walking over and reaching for it.

“That’s okay we can do it some other-”

“Oh no biggie” I didn’t even look at him as I pulled out the tissue paper.  I grinned as I pulled out a pink elephant, slightly bigger than Madi even is.

“Aww!” I held it and pet it, liking the softness of the stuffed animal.

“Yeah that just.. I don’t even know” He chuckled and I set it on the table, reaching in again.  I pulled out a couple of fuzzy blankets, which was greatly appreciated around here, you could never have enough really.  There was another box at the bottom that was wrapped up.  There was a neat pink ribbon tied in a bow.  I gave him a look as I pulled it out, and his features shifted to something I haven’t seen before.  “Th-that’s not- that’s not for Madi that’s actually for you” He said awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck.  “It’s actually your Christmas present... since we were apart this year so..”

“Oh Stiles you shouldn’t have gotten me anything, I didn’t-”

“I know, and I don’t want anything so don’t worry about it” I furrowed my brows but he waved his hand for me to open it.  I untied the ribbon and then pulled off the lid.  My eyes watered at the small collection of items inside.

A red blue and black strings of yarn, tied together to make a friendship bracelet I made him in the fourth grade.

A little plastic case holding a CD that had sharpie all over it.  It said STILES’ FIRE COLLEGE MIXTAPE and there was doodles and funny little drawings.  It made me chuckle.

A photo strip from an ice rink we went to a long time ago.  I teared up a little as I thought back to that day.  Hanging out with Scott and Allison and all of us taking the pictures together.  The first were just us smiling, the second was funny faces, the third we had our warms wrapped around each other, and the last one I’d surprised him and kissed his cheek.  His mouth was wide open in a surprised grin, and his eyes were big round caramel eyes staring at the camera while mine were fluttered shut as my lips were planted on his cheek.  This was sophomore year.  I didn’t know I loved him then, but now I know I did.

“y/n?” I looked up, wiping my eyes with the back of my hand.  Then looked back into the last thing in the box.  A small gold bracelet.  There were links into a more rectangular looking piece, with cursive engraved in it.  y/n m/n l/n with an arrow it.  My fingers traced over it delicately as my eyes widened.

“Stiles...” I set it carefully on the table top as he smiled slightly.  It was just a lip twitch but it made me tear up all over again.  “It’s beautiful” I whispered, and he walked over to me.

“Well I’m glad you think so” He said softly.  I hugged him before he could see me cry.  His arms wrapped around my back.  “I have another gift too but uh.. I don’t want you to be mad” I cocked my head to the side, stepping back just slightly.

“Why would I be-”

“I’ve transferred to Beacon Hills community college for the next year” 

I froze.

“Don’t be mad, really I’m doing it for you- for Madi- I want to help-”

“Stiles..” I didn’t even know what the hell to say.

“It’s already done and in place.  I did it this afternoon” 

My chest heaved.

“y/n this year... it just... it sucked without you- without any of you” He caught himself.

My sharp breaths became audible.  But Stiles stepped forward and put his hands on my arms.

“But GWU it was your dream school..”

“Was.  It was my dream school”

“So now basic community college is your dream school? Stiles stop just- you’re being ridiculous” I put my hands on my forehead, looking down and trying to collect my thoughts.

“If that means I can stay with you- guys- then yes” He stumbled again.

“Stiles do you hear yourself?” I hissed slightly, not wanting to raise my voice and wake up Madi again.  “You’ve been back for barely a day and suddenly-”

“Things have changed, y/n... but the things that have stayed the same I don’t want them to go away”

“Our friendship? Did our friendship go away when you were gone for the year?”

“No but now we can be closer again, don’t you want that?”

“Stiles...” My arms fell from my head and I grasped his hands in mine for a moment.  “Of course I do but, this just seems... it seems foolish”

“But y/n it’s more than that-”

“Then what is it?” I asked.  His mouth hung open for a moment, before he looked down and closed it.  After a long moment of silence, I realized I wasn’t getting the answer I was hoping for and I sighed softly.  “I just don’t want you throwing your life away the way I did, okay?” He didn’t say anything, so I released his hands and raised my palm to rest on his cheek, making him look at me.

“You didn’t, and I’m not” He said, voice weak and tired.  I gave him half a smile but I’m sure my eyes looked sad, seeing that my vision was still misty.

“Well... the decision was already made” I whispered and my hand moved slightly to fall, but his went over top of mine, keeping it set on his jaw.

“I’m not going to apologize to you y/n... this was solely my choice” I gave him a sad smile.

“I know” I said softly.  “I hope it won’t be a bad one”

“It won’t be” He responded, his lips upturned softly.  “Come here” He pulled me close again and hugged me.

“This is great, but if you hug me one more time today I might fall asleep on you” Stiles chuckled, and the vibrations in his chest reverberated against mine, giving me a nice sense of safety.

“That would be okay” He responded, and I patted his back slightly before stepping away for the last time.  I collected the gifts back into the bag as he made his way back to the couch.

“Goodnight Stiles” I practically whispered out, holding back on leaving the room completely.

“Goodnight y/n” He responded just as hushed.  I smiled slightly before I turned around and walked to my room.

I was up for another three hours trying to get to sleep.  I was scrolling through my social media, reading  a boring article on the gas prices when I realized I wasn’t paying attention to my phone screen whatsoever.

No, my mind was too plagued with thoughts of Stiles.

ha i actually posted part 7 like i said i would but oops but here it is ok im too tired to write an authors note sooooo give me feedback? or not, maybe you’d rather eat nutella straight out of the jar and cry bc you can never marry stiles stilinski like i am rn.  whatever makes your goat float in a boat while he boasts about his friend ghost.

yikes im exhausted...

tagged: @morganschiebel @bunnyboo10154 @imissyoualittlemoreeveryday and @johnsonxstilinski and @celestial-writing even tho shes being mean to me rn but i still love her ;)

todays lesson for u kidz is: don’t drop out of college! (even tho stiles didn’t really ‘drop out’ but still a good message)

xoxo~ jordie