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scribe-of-stories · 4 months ago

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I understand the irony of the first post being "Woe are these characters who exist without a land or story" then coming back to write this post.

So as it turns out they have a land and story now. Great.

Anyways last time we talked mostly about Ish, mainly the set up for what he is; so this time we're doing Levi! Along with gods and magic:

There several types of gods: Cultural, Natural, and greatest among them the Celestial. Cultural gods are ones spawned by the thoughts, ideals, and depravity of humans. Meanwhile Natural gods are spawned by landmarks, migration patterns, and storms to name a few. There is some theological debate to be had about if Natural gods are just a subset of Cultural gods, and if they would exist without the presence of humans.

Celestials predate humanity. They are the planets themselves, or as some theorize the planets are a byproduct of their existence Elsewhere. Where the smaller gods are personable and human-like, the aliens minds of the Celestial can hardly be drawn to perceive humanity. Great blessings and calamity tends to follow when one does manage it.

The only celestial body which seems to not have a Celestial mind is the sun, tho it's godhood is also greatly up to theological debate. From an astrological perspective it has the planets bound to it, and is the reason any form of terrestrial life can exist. From a theological perspective is the fact that all things supernatural (blessings, curses, spells, creatures) tends to be weathered or outright destroyed by sunlight.

Magic is, by and large, a product of gods and their connection to a non-physical realm. Much is not understood of how they manage it, but gods have control over whatever domain they are attached to. So for a human to do magic they must contract with a god to have it affect the world. Which has lead to a culture of practitioners dominating/collecting small gods to do their bidding.

Gods of large enough size are capable of binding feats of power to rituals, symbols, or even words if they are strong enough. A god of a mountain might have a several rituals, a pair of symbols, and maybe even a word of power depending on its size; with a major cultural god being similar in scale. Celestials meanwhile have volumes worth of these to share and use; but as with any god, using their power attracts their attention.

Levi was one of the many unfortunate children born to the town of Yasna, twice so when they were adopted/abducted by the town's ruling church. Yasna was a town started by a coven of Elect, a group of leeches whom groomed into existence a god of control (Of Chains and Collars) so to rule over a cult of followers.

Where the other children were loud and required discipline, Levi was quiet and observant. They hardly played, just watched, prodded, and stared with no hint of a soul behind their eyes. The first death among the newly adopted was ruled an accident; but Levi's interest in the corpse left many uncertain.

One of the Elect, a Jezebel by name, took interest in this child. Where the rest were destined for sacrifice or labor, Levi would have a purpose. So she brought them up teaching them how to smile, charm, kill, hide, and most importantly serve and be served by a god. A proper priest set up in just so perfect a position as to help bring Yasna to a burning end.

And so Levi waited. A good little priest, adorned in robes and rituals; good and sanctified helper to the town and its people. Till the day that Jezebel was found to be a heretic, a betrayer who had sired an Elect without consent of the Coven. Staked and burned like the witch she was. With a spot open they did end up keeping the 'fledgling' vampire; and when it came time for one of the town to become his thrall Levi was all too happy to volunteer themself.

Levi had always enjoyed being a tool, a weapon, enjoyed the idea of serving Jezebel's plans. Becoming the thrall to her heir was just going to be another step on the path to the next moment spent killing. Levi only expected their attachment to be as deep as the fangs could reach. It was a welcome surprise that Ish was so much more.

#writeblr #scribe rambles #Ish and Levi #I really need to come up with a world name for them #I should just make it 50 words long where the acronym is a knock knock joke punchline #Anyways Levi is not well #Alternatively they are the most stable person you'll ever meet #Head empty no anxiety about what the future holds #because the future holds their next opportunity to either stab someone or cuddle with Ish #“He's my rock” yeah well they are my favorite little guy #(with a knife)#Anyways this is also effectively part one of Ish and Levi's backstory/full story?

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jesseneufeld · 5 years ago

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If You Want Real Change, Start with SMART Goals

Avoid inflammatory, processed foods. Get plenty of sleep. Move your body on a regular basis. It’s the trifecta of good health. But if this was everything you needed to know, we’d all be metabolically flexible with rock-hard abs and proper blood sugar levels.

That’s because knowing what to do and how to do it are two entirely different things.

Too often, I’ll get messages from new clients saying they’re ready to drop all carbs, get better sleep, start intermittent fasting, cut out fast food, buy blue blockers for everyone in their family, workout more…

In other words, they’re all in.

You’d think I’d be super psyched about their level of motivation. But to me, it means they need help reeling it in. My job as a health coach is to show people how to get from point A to point B, and having broad, sweeping goals with no clear direction doesn’t work. Ever.

Instantly download your FREE guide: The Primal and Keto Guide to Dining Out

How to Make Goals Achievable

To really succeed, you’ve got to know what you’re changing and how to measure your success. Want to sleep more? Eat more veggies? Exercise more? Yep, me too. But real goal setting requires getting smart about it. And that’s where SMART goals come in. Originally credited to Peter Drucker in his 1954 book, The Practice of Management as well as George Doran and Dr. Edwin Lock, and used by everyone from professors to Primal Health Coaches, SMART is an acronym that stands for:

• Specific. What specifically do want to achieve? • Measurable. How will you quantify your results? • Attainable. Do you have the tools to make this happen? • Relevant. Does this goal align with your lifestyle? • Timely. What’s your deadline on this goal?

NOTE: If you’ve seen different versions of this, just know that there are a few different variations out there. Sometimes the ‘S’ stands for significant or simple, the ‘M’ for meaningful or motivating, the ‘A’ for achievable or agreed upon, the ‘R’ for realistic or results-based, and the ‘T’ for time-sensitive or time-based.

Examples of SMART Goals

Want a better night’s sleep? Your SMART goal might be:

S: To get 7-9 hours of sleep per night. M: I’ll use a sleep tracking app to measure my progress. A: I’ll wear my blue blockers for any screen time in the evenings. R: Being in bed by 9:30pm is doable for me. T: Every night until my vacation in the fall.

Want to work out more? Try:

S: I will walk 3 miles every morning. M: I’ll track it with my Garmin. A: GPS watch? Check. New sneakers? Check. R: I have to walk my dog in the morning anyway, so this works. T: For the next 4 weeks.

Remember, SMART goals are designed to be quantifiable and have a defined end point, which helps you get clear about what you’re doing to reach that goal and how you’ll know if you’re successful or not. For example, in a 2005 study,1 researchers worked with 1785 obese men and women seeking treatment for weight loss. Using different goal setting approaches, they found that nearly 52% of participants with unrealistic and unattainable weight loss expectations had discontinue treatment after one year.

The truth is, it’s easy to get discouraged, especially with things that are more long-term. That’s why I always use SMART goals with my clients. But you don’t have to work with a health coach to take advantage of this approach. Follow my How to Write a SMART Goal guide below to get started on your own.

How to Write a SMART Goal

Here’s a sample of the goal setting worksheets I use with my clients. You can highlight this section, right-click, and print to fill out your own SMART Goals, or you can opt to follow the format on a blank sheet in your journal.

SMART Goals

1. Make it Specific. This is the time to get as clear as possible. The more you define your goal, the easier it will be to understand what it will take to get there. Also, be aware of using non-committal phrases like “I want to” or “I think I can”. Get concrete with your goals, describing them in a percentage, frequency, or number.

Write your S here: _____________________________________________________

2. Make it measurable. Adding quantifiable criteria to your goal allows you to measure your success in a tangible way. How else will you know if you’re making progress? Having a goal that’s measurable gives you the evidence that what you’re doing is working, and it’s an easy way to ward off feeling overwhelmed by larger goals. Plus, there are tons of apps for measuring everything from macros to miles.

Write your M here: ______________________________________________________ 3. Make it attainable. Keep in mind that your goal should also be doable. It’s okay to push the boundaries here and there, but if you’re thinking you want to run a marathon in 3 weeks or drop 50 pounds in a month, you might want to revisit your goal so that it’s in the realm of what’s possible. The idea is to choose something that feels attainable with the right effort, commitment, and available resources.

Write your A here: _______________________________________________________

4. Make it relevant. Relevance means that it aligns with other aspects or longer-term goals of your life. How does it fit within the big picture? How does it impact or contribute to your household, your work environment, or your family responsibilities? Think about why you’re setting this goal now and why it’s important to you.

Write your R here: _______________________________________________________

5. Make it timely. While I’m not a fan of dropping pounds for an event or summer or bikini body or whatever, having a deadline can set you up for success. An end-date provides the motivation to stick with it. It also keeps you from being too unrealistic with your goal. Even if you plan on eating paleo or sleeping 8 hours a night forever, choosing an end date will give you the parameters to know if you were successful or not.

Write your T here: _______________________________________________________

Why Use SMART Goals?

Think back on the health goals you’ve had in the past. Maybe you weren’t as successful as you would have liked. Or maybe you’re a pro goal setter and knocked it out of the park. For those of you who feel like you’re working super hard and seeing zero progress, I want you to know that there’s a way to be smarter about reaching your goals. And it starts with these five steps:

• Make it specific. • Make it measurable. • Make it attainable. • Make it relevant. • Make it timely.

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References

https://iris.unimore.it/retrieve/handle/11380/1170579/210096/Obes%20Res%202005.pdf

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lauramalchowblog · 5 years ago

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If You Want Real Change, Start with SMART Goals

That’s because knowing what to do and how to do it are two entirely different things.

In other words, they’re all in.

Instantly download your FREE guide: The Primal and Keto Guide to Dining Out

How to Make Goals Achievable

Examples of SMART Goals

Want a better night’s sleep? Your SMART goal might be:

Want to work out more? Try:

How to Write a SMART Goal

SMART Goals

Write your S here: _____________________________________________________

Write your A here: _______________________________________________________

Write your R here: _______________________________________________________

Write your T here: _______________________________________________________

Why Use SMART Goals?

• Make it specific. • Make it measurable. • Make it attainable. • Make it relevant. • Make it timely.

(function($) { $("#dfSlcPc").load("https://www.marksdailyapple.com/wp-admin/admin-ajax.php?action=dfads_ajax_load_ads&groups=674&limit=1&orderby=random&order=ASC&container_id=&container_html=none&container_class=&ad_html=div&ad_class=&callback_function=&return_javascript=0&_block_id=dfSlcPc" ); })( jQuery );

References

https://iris.unimore.it/retrieve/handle/11380/1170579/210096/Obes%20Res%202005.pdf

The post If You Want Real Change, Start with SMART Goals appeared first on Mark's Daily Apple.

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skookumfiles · 8 years ago

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Case 117: Ole’ Yeller

S.C.U.C.M (Skookum) files: Case 117- Ole Yeller It was a pretty standard infestation case of a nest of werewolves in a liberal town, on a University campus, woven into the on and off campus life. The risk management assessors of interdimensional insurance had been monitoring the situation and noticed the disappearance rate and pack size had begun to proceed at an increasing pace. At the next full moon, there would be an easily predicted mathematically significant event known as a rising. The pack would consume a large number of pedestrians and turn an even greater number. Policy holder risk was becoming too great, as was the visibility of both Social Justice Warriors and Werewolves on this particular earth. Every mundane agency uses contractors for roof leaks, termites, and the occasional oddball problem of Africanized honey bees. Interdimensional insurance was no different. You can’t beat someone at what they do for a living, so you pay the people who specialize in the problem to make it go away discreetly so the neighbors aren’t alarmed. So it is with werewolves that the contracts were nearly exclusively handled across dimensions by a group of enthusiastic individuals under the umbrella of an S-corporation known as Social Justice Complications and Unintentional Consequences Management. Skookum, as they were known in the insurance business breakrooms, were capable of handling a broad range of lycanthropes, aquatic leviathan, genetically mutated horrors, and your occasional chimera. They were particularly good at sniffing out the clever ones who embedded in the social justice communities where people made any number of excuses that allowed the proverbial, and literal, wolf into the henhouse. Their handling of the great werebear incident on Earth 2312 was legendary in the halls of numerous branches of the agency, mostly because the underwriters were ready to write off the whole planet as a loss- and that would have been a significant ding to their reputation of good customer service. Some even had Skookum coffee mugs and calendars at their desk. It was rare to find an agent without a Skookum pen or pencil that they protected jealously, especially one with Georgia’s name on it. That’s the secret to risk abatement: value. Underpromise and over deliver. If you can maintain assets, discretion, and a thorough routing of the problem, you’re a top shelf contractor who understands customer service to the agency, and by extension the ethic of customer service the agency extends to customers. The case #117 is a classic example of how the agency now refers to making a problem Skookem when it seems impossibly out of hand for the average or beginner who is more suited to groundhogs, vampire voles, or the troublesome Gleendoric parasites of Earth 220. ______________________________

The meeting was going over time, but the rapt attention that most were paying to PeaceLilly was signaling that the meeting of the social justice and equality league (Not every acronym has to form an English word, you Anglo-normative ethnocentric paraquat- PeaceLilly). Peace Lilly had begun by talking about the peace garden project they were due to be working on that weekend, even though the neighborhood they’d be driving to in her biodiesel powered Mercedes wagon needed clean needles and a grocery store more than a garden. When she got going she passed the garden project by in short order and launched into a speech about diversity and how they all needed to check their privilege when in a neighborhood populated by POC (people of color) and to remember that gender bias was stronger in those poorer and darker cultures. That led into another 10 minutes of speaking about how if someone hit on them that they should feel ok with hooking up because people would never be able to experience the culture of University life when so poor and hopeless. Knowing what it’s like to have sex with a college student could be valuable to the residents and spur them toward higher education.

The room responded with “right on” and “yes!” shouts to all of these exhortations as she moved on from pity sex to reminding the 2 males in the room that they should be open to hooking up with men or women because they were so privileged that discomfort was something that would bring them closer to the experiences of the women and fluid genders around them. Below them, on the ground floor of the student center for activities and outreach, the doors automatically closed and locked to the outside as the clock struck 5 PM. The dull thud and bright click echoing through the halls, reminded everyone that the official time for the meeting was up, but they would stay as long as they liked, or until some white male came to tell them to leave. “Uh, PeaceLilly, I thought we were going to have food tonight?” asked one scrawny guy who was sitting in the back of the room. “Yes, there will be a meal.” She said, looking irritated that he interrupted her while she was taking a breath between rants. “We have a guest coming and then we’ll start.” As if on cue, a polite knock on the door interrupted the man from asking any more questions. Peace Lilly opened the door and turned with a big grin to the group. “Everyone, meet Ember Moon! She is tonight’s guest here to talk about more social justice topics and what it’s like to be a female in a male dominated field.” Ember stepped into the room. Her patchouli scented patchwork clothing swished as the corduroy sections brushed against each other with her strides to the front of the room. Her big head of mousey dishwater blonde dreds swayed down to her lower back in big fat links of matted and rolled perfection. Her sizeable belly poked from under her dull scissors shortened Joan Jett t-shirt. Everyone in the room kind of held their breath as she dramatically paused before she started. “I kind of like to ground myself in the space. Really connect with the energy of the room. You all smell really great and have such a nice energy. I’m guessing you’re all vegetarians or vegans, right?” She began in a low and husky voice of a woman who had been smoking a lot of weed for a long time. Her sallow face was marked with the lines of either laughter or pain, maybe both. She looked to be between 30 and 50, but who can tell when you abandon personal grooming for a philosophical statement about your personal values? “We’re all plant based consumers, except for Keightlynn and the gentleman in the back- I’m sorry, what’s your name?” PeaceLilly interjected. “Uh, my name is Tommy. My pronouns are cis dominant, but I self identify as a non-gendered being of light having a physical experience.” Jimmy said matter of factly. “I, uh, eat meat as a part of my physical experience.” Peacelilly seemed to soften a bit toward Jimmy after he introduced himself. Maybe he wasn’t just here for a free meal. after all? “So, who is Keightlynn?” Ember inquired. “Just raise your hand. We’re not on a witch hunt here. Just want to know who the carnivore is.” A small but fit young woman in the 2nd row, near the door Peacelilly was standing beside, raised her hand. In a meek voice she declared herself to be “here” wherever that may be in the philosophical landscape. She was dressed in a pair of loose fitting pants, sported some shoulder length black dreds over a black tshirt, and her pale skin had a nice glow to it. She didn’t seem as hollow cheeked and spindly as the rest, even in a seated position. Ember pointed to her with a quick jab of her right hand and said “cool…” as she seemed to make a mental note. Ember began to speak about the need for outreach, and about how the world needs us to go out and find the people willing to listen to the truth and actually hear it. Naturally this was women and POC, but in rare exceptions those outside the spheres of the downtrodden could be reached as well. “White people” she said with a sneer, despite her own caucasian features and skin, were the problem until you could “reverse brainwash” them. Two hours passed and as the sun went down the silvery light of the moon illuminated the sidewalks and vehicles parked outside the building.

Ember moved on from the ideas of simple outreach to talk about “food deserts” and how many people didn’t know how difficult it was for some to obtain food in their communities due to special dietary needs, lack of decent food sources, and the privilege of some to deny others what they needed through stigma. Privilege was a main problem, apparently. The root of all things negative and oppressive were wrapped around the vague idea of privilege, particularly the ideas around food culture and dietary necessity.

A loud knock on the doors downstairs made Peace Lilly excuse herself to “let more guests in.” “So, when are we going to eat?” Tommy, the being of light, interrupted again. “Oh, we’re not going to eat.” Ember continued, glancing out at the silvery light bathing the parking lot. “Well, you’re not.” She walked over to the window and stood in the moonlight. Her skin began to darken and her limbs began to thicken. Her face grew and triangulated as big sharp teeth replaced her peglike human chompers. In just a few seconds she had gained at least a foot in height and was covered in a blonde coat of thick hair. Her patch work clothes had fallen to the floor and her Joan Jett t-shirt was stretched tight across her chest. She ripped it off with a quick slash of her claws. The room full of plant grazers moved quickly to the door, finding it locked. They began beating on the door. Tommy shoved them out of his way and put his shoulder into the steel door, a loud thump issuing into the empty hallways outside. Then a noise of metal sliding across a cheap vinyl floor sounded and the door swung open into the hallway. The mass of crying and frightened smelly people started out the door then scurried back in, like a school of fish moving away from a shark. Two more werewolves stepped into the doorway and blocked egress from the room. Both dark haired and smaller than Ember, but still larger than PeaceLilly who stepped into the room between them. She locked the door behind her. One of them began sniffing the air and followed his nose over to Keightlynn who was still seated in the 2nd row by the door. He let out a little cough, like he smelled something rancid, and looked over at Tommy, then at Ember. Ember nodded toward the mass of people in the corner of the room and the two began to herd them tighter into the corner. Peacelilly held up both hands to the group. “Diversity is one of our most cherished values. And we all must check our privilege of thinking we are the top of the food chain. We all have a chance now to be lupine-Americans, if we wish to engage in a participant observation that will change the way people see eating meat and not supporting their neighbors of all colors.” She looked over at Keightlynn who was still in her chair. The two smaller ones got closer to the group, smelling them and licking their faces with long red hot tongues. Finally, overcome with bloodlust, they jerked one girl out of the crowd, a vegan named Mary Bell who had the muscle tone of a tomato and the fat content of a broccoli stalk. They tore wildly at her body, swallowing entire chunks of her, pushing her long bones into the corner of their mouths to crack them open and eat her marrow. The mass of people in the corner screamed and writhed into an impossibly small wad as blood sprayed on them from Mary Bell’s punctured body, and the sound of her bones and flesh being torn and rent filled the space between high pitched wails. There was another heavy pounding on the door. PeaceLilly opened the door and let one more werewolf in, quickly closing and locking it again. “Everyone is here. Good.” She said, shoving the key in the medicine bag that hung off her neck. “Now, everyone calm down. It’s time to decide if you want to be part of the solution, or part of the problem. Checking your privilege has never been as important as it is right now.” The third smaller werewolf, overcome with bloodlust, jumped on Mary Bell’s head and began gnawing at it, causing the three to engage in a rolling fight with one another as Ember looked on. PeaceLilly then changed and jumped into the fracas, pushing them all away from their meal. She was smaller than Ember and bigger than the 3. She managed them easily despite their numbers. It was then that PeaceLilly, now a dark, large, and panting werewolf, began to walk back to the mass of screaming social justice club members and began savagely eyeing them. Suddenly she was knocked clear across the room and began kicking desks and chairs away from her as she writhed on the floor holding the side of her head. The three smaller ones turned in time to see Keightlynn coming at them. One, two, three, all of their heads were severed from their bodies and gouts of red blood gushed onto the floor as their bodies fell limply and began to turn human again. Keightlynn leapt over 4 desks with a battered bronze blade in one hand and a pair of old brass knuckles in the other. PeaceLilly snarled and started to leap at her and caught another left hand in the face, the silver cast into the knucks burning and caving in part of her head. Her tongue lolled out of her mouth across her hideous teeth and she fell back dazed. Her head struggled to repair itself around the impact of the silver, but it was not nearly quick enough. A moment later and the bronze sword found her neck, her heavy lupine head hitting the floor with a hollow thud as it began to turn human again. The Social Justice club kept screaming, still tightly coiling and writhing. They were a primal frightened mass unable to make a coherent thought.

Now Ember’s eyes widened in fear as Keightlynn stepped toward her. “Ah-ite, ole yeller. End of the line for you.” Keightlynn said in a thick East Tennessee accent. Ember quickly morphed back into her human form. Only very old and very powerful werewolves could do that neat trick at will during a full moon. “That name is ableist and ageist! You don’t understand, but if you’d just listen…” She began. “You have the privilege of eating meat and yet you would begrudge us our goddess given right to…” Keightlynn’s left hand flashed again and the knucks caught a glancing blow on Ember’s chin, though it would have been a knockout if Ole Yeller hadn’t feinted to the right so quickly. Instantly, Ember changed back to her werewolf form and with a deafening snarl leap at Keightlynn. Unfazed, bored even, Keightlynn moved toward her, then to the side, causing Ember to have to recalculate and turn to see where she was going. A left caught Ember on the side of the head changing her northbound leap into an Eastbound rolling tangle of hairy limbs and falling teeth that all piled up against the wall. The Social Justice club continued to shriek and try to shrink to nothing in vain. One young man who came to the University as Jeremiah Simms, and was now simply called Trayvon, put a hand on each side of his head and shrieked “Mamaaaaaaaa!!!” as he scuttled backward against the wall, his eyes wide with terror and confusion. Keightlynn stepped over to Ember who was trying to gather herself to counter the whack to her head that smoked and bled. A quick swing of the bronze blade, mostly with the wrist, not the broad desperate swing you see in movies, and Ember’s head hit the cheap vinyl floor with the same watermelon thud as the others. “Four weeks. It took me four weeks to track you from UCLA to Berkeley to UT and here to South Carolina. Lotta dead kids. Lotta damage. But I knew I was gonna put you down. Wish it was sooner than later, but done is done.” Keightlynn zipped open the fanny pack on her waist and hooked a short tether onto the pommel of her bronze blade. She dropped the whole sword into the depth of the small fanny pack and zipped it up. Then she reached over and touched something on her knucks. An instant later, she only had a thin brass ring on her middle finger. She sent a text on her phone quickly as Trayvon stared at her from across the room and shouted “thank you, Keightlynn! You saved us!” “Mah name ain’t Keightlynn, dipshit.” She said, sending one more text after a beep noted she’d received a response. Suddenly the door opened and the room was filled with people in Tyvek suits and respirators who were putting Mary Bell, Ember, PeaceLilly, and the others in heavy plastic bags. “Well, what is your name?” Trayvon queried loudly as the others were starting to flag from the adrenaline and panic they’d been maintaining. “Georgia, from Tennessee.” She said in a distracted tone, picking up a small but complicated looking hand held radio that one of the cleanup techs handed her. “Hay Stranger, you got your ears on?” “Tom Stranger, here. Are we…” he paused “Skookum?” “Yeah, code name Ole Yeller got herself put down.” Georgia said matter of factly. “We should be Skookum tight and wrapped up in a jiffy.” “I can always count on you.” Stranger said, a chuckle crackling over the radio. “Well, darlin’. Customer service is so very important.” Georgia cooed into the mic, a small smirk spreading across one corner of her mouth. “And you are my fay-vo-rite customer.” She flipped the radio back into the hands of the cleanup tech and walked out the door into the hall as Tom Stranger’s voice crackled something over the airwaves that didn’t sound like insurance business.

#mhi #tom stranger #interdimensonal insurance

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bdbdb · 8 years ago

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As a participant in the Santa Monica Community Police Academy I was allowed to schedule a “ride along” if I wanted one. I’ve never been on a ride along before so it wasn’t even a question, I wanted to go! Every ride along is different because everything you see/learn depends on the calls you get, it’s impossible to predict the future after all, but that might just be the most important lesson to take away from the experience.

There isn’t any photography allowed while on a ‘ride along,’ this was the only picture I was able to sneakily take. And then I got “artsy” with it.

Generally speaking you show up at the police station right before a shift starts, sit in on ‘roll call,’ meet your new cop buddy, and then hit the streets catching bad guys and/or helping people. After about 4 hours your new cop buddy takes you back to the station, swears up and down that you haven’t haven’t annoyed them with your non-stop silly questions, and you’re done!

Uh… Some of that may only apply to me, now that I think about it. 😉

My ride along was with C shift, so it was evening when I started. (You guys don’t even know how long I had “C is For Cookie” stuck in my head!) Roll call sort of seemed like homeroom in a strange kind of way. Attendance was taken and there were “school announcements” (department information etc.) No one was furiously copying their neighbor’s homework or trying to hide how sleepy they were,* so maybe it wasn’t that much like homeroom after all.

*(I mean that no one was sleepy, not that they were all yawning in the open or resting their heads on the table.)

Specific cases were discussed so everyone was working with the most current information, and I played a very quiet game of “guess the acronym” to myself. Some of them I knew from TV, some from class, and the rest I sort of guessed at. I would later learn that NFD stands for ‘no further description.’ Although I had two out of three words wrong, I’m giving myself credit for NFD because meaning wise my guess was 100% accurate. I was thinking ‘details’ instead of ‘description’ and I’ll let you figure out the rest on your own.

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One of the walls in the roll call room has a very large depiction of the Santa Monica Police badges through the years. Now I have questions all about badges too. Why the change in 1915 from the star shape to the shield shape? I mean, both are cool, it’s just idle curiosity, but someone had to have wanted the change right? Things don’t just decide to change shape on their own, so what’s that all about? Same with the change in color from silvery to gold-ish in 1915 and back again in 1948. Is there a specific reason for the changes, or does it have more to do with who was mining what ores at the time? I think my biggest question is why the change in 1959 from “policeman” to “patrolman”? That makes no sense to me. I’m sure there’s a reason, but I don’t even know who would have that information or where to look for it.

After roll call was dismissed my partner for the night gave me a tour of that section of the station and we headed out to the patrol car. The most interesting part of the tour was actually watching people interact with “my” officer. Sometimes in an official manner, but usually not. Usually about work, but sometimes not. I’m not dumb, I know everyone knew there was an extra set of eyes on them and would have acted accordingly. Generally though, if I had to describe the ‘feeling’ or vibe I saw within the SMPD I’d have to say it was camaraderie and respect.

Actually, I should go back. The most interesting thing to me about roll call was sort of the same. Roll call is more formal than people passing each other in the hallway obviously, but it wasn’t just “here’s some info, now go to work” either. Officers were shown how to use a digital tool they have at their disposal and encouraged to play around with it until they were more comfortable. Officers were encouraged to think about strategy and operations they could develop and bring those ideas back to their supervisors. It was about making the community safer, but it was also about supporting/nurturing co-workers and employees to challenge themselves and grow. It was really nice to see.

On our way to the patrol car we passed the most gorgeous old police car but there was no time to stop and admire it. A little research online tells me that the car is an 1964 Plymouth Savoy. I’m not really a “car person” (unless we are talking about things like the Nethercutt collection) but this car is so adorably bad ass that I’m a little in love with it. (I tend to anthropomorphize everything around me.) I want to take pictures of it. I want to ride around town in it. I want to pull people over with that car. Mostly I want to watch people’s reactions to that car. Would they even take it seriously or would they think they be looking for hidden cameras?

We were finally ready to go, or so I thought. Nope, it’s not like jumping in the car to run an errand, there’s a whole list of things to do to make sure the patrol car and various equipment is ready for use. My ‘partner’ also showed me the computer system they use inside the car. Everything I was shown made sense, but collectively the amount of coded information on the screen is overwhelming. I’m sure it’s like anything else and becomes second nature after a while, but wow it was a lot!

We left the police station and headed out. We answered a number of different calls throughout the night, never getting the same kind of call twice. At one point there was a call to my home address about a neighbor, but that wasn’t answered by us. It just amused me to see from the opposite perspective.

Typically we’d get a call and look at the information on the car’s computer. My ‘partner’ would talk to me about what might potentially happen when we arrived and how we should arrive (depending on the type of call.) My ‘partner’ was always thinking ahead about the best/safest/most effective way to do their job. Sometimes the information the police were given was wrong, and officers had to sort out what they were actually dealing with and shift gears to respond to the situation.

Calls are prioritized so sometimes we’d arrive just after something happened and deal with it, but sometimes we’d go to calls that were hours and hours old and find nothing. That doesn’t have anything to do with laziness or whatever reason you’re thinking, it’s entirely about too many calls and not enough resources. Just like sick people in an emergency room, the lowest priorities are going to the bottom of the list.

There were a few procedural things I learned here and there, but mostly I found value in being able to fade into the background and watch. In nearly every civilian interaction I witnessed officers were treated as “the enemy” upon arrival, but always the dynamic would shift at some point as the civilian would try to put the officer into the role of “mommy/daddy” and expect the officer to “fix it,” whatever ‘it’ was. It was only a few hours worth of patrolling, and not every call resulted in a civilian interaction, but even in very different circumstances I saw that same shift. I also watched a civilian speaking very differently to a female officer than a male one. The civilian never crossed the line into being outright disrespectful, but the difference was noticeable. I just wanted to smack the jerk upside the head and say “dude, they’re both police officers, knock it off!”

I asked the female officer about what I’d seen and she didn’t really have anything to say about it. I mean, of course she only knows how people talk to her, it’s not like she does her job in someone else’s body occasionally, but it just aggravated me that it happened at all and makes me sad that it’ll probably happen her whole career. I also asked what it was like being a female officer in the Santa Monica Police Department and she didn’t really have an answer. She wasn’t blowing me off, she genuinely tried to satisfy my question, but there really wasn’t anything specific she could point to. The lack of an answer is actually its own type of answer, and I’m taking that to mean it is a non-issue in the SMPD. So really, it was the perfect answer.

I can’t really talk about the specifics of any of the calls we went to, but there was one that was so potentially dangerous that I was told to stay back and let the officers approach without me. I tried to surreptitiously watch from the shadows. It was too dark for me to get a ‘selfie,’ but it probably looked exactly like this:

I have no explanation that doesn’t involve brain damage.

Survey results!

Every week I’ve found at least one opportunity to ask an officer “When has TV or film come the closest to accurately showing what law enforcement is like?” (Or some variation of the same question.) I’m also including in the final tally a few responses from police officers I asked outside of normal class interaction. Two different law enforcement agencies other than SMPD are represented. I asked my ‘favorite cop of all time’ (hi Brad, miss you!) what his thoughts were on the subject. I also had to invent a reason to talk to a sheriff on a Metro platform in downtown LA because he was one of the most attractive men I have ever seen (shut up, I’m allowed to be shallow sometimes) so into the survey he went. It’s not like this was a super scientific survey or anything, but now you can’t accuse me of misrepresenting the data.

Final tallies: End of Watch – 6 Southland – 5 Cops (and other “reality” TV) – 5 The Wire – 4 Reno 911 – 3 Law & Order – 2 Lethal Weapon – 1 CHiPs – 1

If there was a “winner” it would be End of Watch. I haven’t seen it and don’t know much about it, but it is going on my “To Watch” list after this. Based on the title I’m guessing it doesn’t end happily, so I’m going to keep some tissues nearby when I watch it.

@bdbdb @SantaMonicaPD If U chk the IMDb credits for End of Watch, U'll will see a familiar name; hint: SantaMonicaCoP, who was then w/IPD where movie was filmed!

— Jacqueline Seabrooks (@SantaMonicaCoP) May 17, 2017

I checked the IMDB credits and here’s what I saw:

Chief Seabrooks was involved and it’s the best Hollywood has done. Yeah, that makes sense. I get it now. Winner.

Southland and Cops/”reality” TV are the other two responses that I heard the most. (Southland is the show one officer found so realistic he couldn’t watch it!) As for Cops and other “reality” television, I’m still skeptical. Maybe this reveals the most interesting thing about the results though. I think, looking over the variety of the answers, it’s pretty obvious that whatever question I thought I was asking the person at the other end was hearing something different. I think some officers heard the question with law enforcement overall in mind and other officers were hearing me ask about their specific job. There’s no right or wrong answer, although I’m guessing “Lethal Weapon” was a joke answer and not an attempt to start a conversation about mental health and the particular challenges police officers face. But maybe I’m wrong. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

No one answered Brooklyn Nine Nine which surprised me a little. Not because I thought it’s accurate or anything, its humor is ridiculous, but because it is a current show and when the B99 writers want to make a serious point they do it incredibly well. (Did anyone watch the episode where Terry is detained for being black in public?)

I’m also a little bummed that no one answered Scott & Bailey. I didn’t expect to hear that as an answer, but it means I need to continue my search for someone who works in law enforcement and has seen the show. Unlike American crime shows where the “bad guy” is a 4th act reveal, a lot of Scott & Bailey’s drama comes from building the case so the criminal can be charged. The audience and the police both know who the “bad guy” is early in the episode. I have no idea if Scott & Bailey is accurate or if they are just telling a story in a different way than I’m used to, but it would be fascinating to talk to someone in law enforcement and get their take on it.

It’s not quite a “palm tree pic” but this wasn’t a normal class post so I’ve decided it counts.

My ride along w/ the @SantaMonicaPD (also final survey results!) As a participant in the Santa Monica Community Police Academy I was allowed to schedule a "ride along" if I wanted one.

#Law Enforcement #Police #Santa Monica #Santa Monica Community Police Academy

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