#I should do daily in genshin but i feel... emptyish so dunno

[hushedstars]

Crying. So this was his imagination. And not my "I'm not devastated by SandRay fight because we know they hugged later on". Now I am devastated.

Like I know things will be fine (well I know nothing, but SandRay is endgame. Thank you.) but a lot of bad things were said by Ray to Sand. And yeah he did get everything wrong but the conclusion he came to destroyed him and his trust in Sand at that time. And Sand didn't correct him, didn't tell him what truly happened between him and Ray's dad because Ray's words cut him deeply.

They both need to cradle each other hearts and just be gentle with them. Please boys, just heal. Stop hurting each other (especially Ray. Good lord man, go grovel and pamper him - I kind of think he also deserves an apology from Sand for not being clear with him. But gods did he hurt him with his accusations.)

And gods I want Ray to be happier. Healthier. I want him to cradle his own heart as well and cherish it. Do better. Heal.

His apology monologue. I don't know. Just. It was raw. This is what we wanted from Ray. Being self-aware. Understanding that he keeps hurting Sand. And it's good. It's important. But you also feel for him. "No one can put up with me.". Him basically saying that his source of happiness can never speak to him again because he fucked up so much. Him breaking apart because he may have lost Sand forever. And it may be killing him inside but he is finally mature enough to step back. And yet. And yet he is begging this imaginary Sand for one more chance. To see him. To forgive.

We went from Ray shouting at Sand that he makes his life hell, to Ray thanking imaginary Sand for being there for him (making his life better). Now I hope that real Sand will hear those words, and many more, too.

"Ever since you walked into my life, I've been so happy." this line. It's so sweet yet heartbreaking. It's going to be SandRay line from now on, I think.

(I bet this was also one of the scenes in which they had to scream at First not to cry. He was struggling. Also he was probably playing that Lady reacting to Ray's pain and hug, empathy to a stranger. He had to act as if he doesn't have history with Khao's character - nor Khao himself. I dare to think that it's easier to see your best friend acting out crying scene when your characters know each other than when they don't and you have to be a little bit detached instead of letting your own real feelings mix with the character you are portraying. Kudos to him as well.)