#I said not from big companies cause there is a whole episode where he explodes a building for profiting off him

[kakapim]

One of my favorite dcmk headcanons is that Kaito owns his own merch. Not from big companies but like,, from his fans. You bet he has a plushie, custom cards and keychains of himself

[sortasirius]

“Despair” and Dean and Cas

Well well well, winning is my favorite thing.

As usual, this is going to be as long as hell. And fair warning, it’s extremely emotional.

So here it is, the thing that we have been barrelling towards for years, literally years.

Just want to point out this.  Also, I will NEVER allow someone to speak negatively about this writing group, EVER.

Team Free Dads starting off the episode is so sweet, so scary.  Cas’ calming, Dean’s fear, Sam’s desperation, really just hammering home how much they love Jack, how his pain is pain for them, how losing him is unbearable.

“I can’t stop this.  I’m coming apart.  I don’t want to hurt you.  Don’t let me hurt you.”

Oof.  If you’ve ever question whether Jack is a Winchester, this line should shut that shit down for you.

When I tell you I was PISSED when Billie sent Jack to the Empty to EXPLODE?????  PAIN.

“Yeah the Empty can’t come to earth, not without being summoned.”

Hello Bobo, clue number 1.

The fact that they only had Jack in limbo for like five seconds was great for my heart health, thank u very much Bobo.

Also Dean wielding Death’s scythe?????? KING?????

Man, Sam and Dean’s growth.  The way that they’re able to, idk, actually speak on how they feel without death looming or fear or pain.  It’s just a conversation, just an honest conversation of Dean admitting his mistakes, admitting how he felt.  Admitting that he fucked up, and Sam forgiving him for it.

CHARLIE AND HER GF CHARLIE AND HER GF CHARLIE AND HER GF

Also...hunters and their “dates.”  Two hunters who are happily together, who are happily fighting monsters.  Hm.  Sounds like a Saileen/Destiel parallel to me boys.

You ever wish Cas would look and the mirror and take the great advice he gives others?  Because I do.  He’s always tried to be “useful” for Sam and Dean, for Jack, always tried to make sure that he’s useful enough that they keep him around.  But what he doesn’t understand, what he’s never understood, is that they need him because of who he is, not because of what he contributes.

Remind y’all of anything?

And here we have Clue Number 2

And then, Sam’s realization.  Eileen.

Did I begin full tilt screaming no in my apartment when he said her name?  Who’s to say?

How can a lock screen cause me this much pain????

Okay but: Charlie loses Stevie, Sam loses Eileen.  Clue Number 3.

I feel like I don’t talk enough about how much Sam loves Eileen.  About how obvious it is that they are endgame, about how happy he is when he talks about her.  This just feels like a blow to the stomach, but we’ve barely even started.

Sam immediately shifting into protective leader mode?  He is the love of my life.

Dean’s simple nod, like it’s a given?  Enough to do me in right there.

This is another episode where it’s just so clear that Sam is the leader of the North American hunters.  Everyone knows him, everyone is willing to follow him.  He’s knowledgeable and kind and fair and just and an incredibly capable fighter.  Once again, I don’t believe his work on earth is done.

Can we also please talk about how FRIGHTENING IT WAS for Jack to kill that plant???  I don’t really have much of a comment on it because I was literally just like ?????

With Billie saying that it’s Chuck, the way that people were dusted, very similar to Becky and Amara, I honestly wouldn’t be surprised, especially with Donna getting taken off the board.  It’s like I said last week, I don’t buy that he’s taken himself off the board, he’s too invested in the unraveling of this story to take a step back.  He’s gotta break them before he can defeat them, that’s the only way.

And here we go, into one of the most painful and surreal things I will ever write about.

Dean’s speech.  His guilt, his regret.  The shame of not only trapping himself, but the pain, the horror of trapping Cas.

“I just lead us into another trap.  All because I, I couldn’t hurt Chuck.  Because I was angry and because I just needed something to kill, and because that’s all I know how to do.”

“Dean-”

“It was Chuck all along.  We never should have left Sam and Jack, we should be there with them now.  Everybody’s gonna die, Cas.  Everybody.  I can’t stop it.”

His narrative arc.  Tied up in a bow.

“She’s gonna get through that door.”

“I know.”

“And she’s gonna kill you and then she’s gonna kill me.  I’m sorry.”

Cas smiles.

Cas knows.  He knows what’ll get them out of this, and he knows that he would do anything in this Universe for Dean Winchester. The human man he fell for.

“When Jack was dying, I made a deal to save him.”

“You what?”

“The price was my life.  When I experienced a moment of true happiness, the Empty would be summoned and it would take me forever.”

“Why are you telling me this now?”

“I always wondered, ever since I took that burden, that curse, I’ve wondered what it could be, what my true happiness could even look like.  I never found an answer, because the one thing I want, it’s something I know I can’t have. 

“But I think I know, I think I know now...happiness isn’t in the having, it’s in just being.  It’s in just saying it.”

“What are you talking about, man?”

The most selfless thing Cas does in this, and he does a lot of selfless things, is to tell Dean Winchester how impossibly good he is.  To tell him that he is worthy, to tell him that he is adored.

“I know, I know how you see yourself, Dean.  You see yourself the same way our enemies see you.  You’re destructive and you’re angry and you’re broken and you’re daddy’s blunt instrument.  And you think that hate and anger, that’s what drives you, that’s who you are.  It’s not.  And everyone who knows you sees it, and everything you have ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love.  You raise your little brother for love, you fought for this whole world for love.  That is who you are.

“You’re the most caring man on earth.  You are the most selfless, loving human being I will ever know.  You know, ever since we met, ever since I pulled you outta Hell...knowing you has changed me.

“Because you cared, I cared.  I cared about you, I cared about Sam, I cared about Jack, I cared about the whole world because of you. 

“You changed me, Dean.”

“Why does this sound like a goodbye?”

Dean’s greatest fear. His fear of those loving him leaving him. The terror of being alone.

“Because it is.

The head shake.  Don’t love me.  Don’t love me if it means you’ll leave me, don’t love me, everyone I love leaves me.  Don’t leave me.  Don’t love me.  Don’t leave me.

“Don’t do this, Cas.”

Just like I always thought.  One last look at Dean before the Empty takes him.

“Cas-”

“Goodbye Dean.”

And Dean is left, broken on the floor, unable to answer Sam’s calls, unable to do anything.  It doesn’t matter to him that Chuck has wiped everyone out, it doesn’t matter to him that Sam and Jack might need him.  It doesn’t matter.  It doesn’t matter, because the thing that mattered still hangs on his lips, still waiting to be said, and now he won’t get another chance to say it.

The fact that I am writing this, even with all my spec, with all my analysis of the writers’ room, of their text, of the way Dabb and co had approached this story, nothing could have ever prepared me for this.  Nothing could have prepared me for a three and a half minute, uninterrupted scene where Cas confesses not only that he loves Dean, but that he has always loved him.

I talk a lot about how these writers don’t get the credit they deserve.  Unfortunately, from most of this fandom, they never will.  We will likely never know the fights with the network they had, the steps backward they had to take, the way they had to beg and fight and claw to get this on the screen.  But they did it.  They did it for these characters, they did it for this dinosaur of a show, and yeah, they did it for us.

It was not easy, I can promise you, to get this greenlit.  They had to fight for this, they likely had to call in favors and make threats and quite literally put their careers on the line (you may scoff at that, but WB is a BIG company, especially in the TV/movie world) for this story.  This story of Dean and Cas, the man dragged out of Hell and the angel who fell for him.

I have tons more to say, and will likely have several more posts about this, but I want to leave all my babes who are worried that that was the end for Dean and Cas with some takeaways.

Sam is missing Eileen.  Dean is missing Cas.  That is no longer a fun subtextual parallel, that is it for them.  Their respective endgames are missing, and they will not know their peace until they get them back.  Chuck will not win.  That’s not the story being told, and right now?  He’s winning.  He’s broken them, left them with nothing, left them with an empty world and a hole in each of their hearts where their person (or angel) used to be.

Our show is going to end with “contentment.”  “Contentment” isn’t from Sam and Dean being filled with grief and hitting the open road.  It isn’t Sam getting Eileen back and leaving Dean with no one.  “Contentment” is Sam and Eileen, Dean and Cas.  Together.

[andoqin]

Sisyphus: The Myth Ep 1- A Dissection

Okay, so I’ve had some time to process what I subjected myself to today, so I’ve decided to list everything in episode 1 that is just completely insane and an example of how Not To Do it. 

I’m not an expert on Film Theory, but i’ve watched a shitton of media, plus I watch a lot of Youtube Video essays, so clearly I’m half

The episode starts off okay enough even if we get a weird exposition dump and “tense” parting scene between a father and daughter. 

We start in what presumably is the time travel terminal where people stand around in pyjamas waiting to get through.

Okay, fairly interesting if unspectacular but I’m guessing that’s the point, this is now an industry. We zoom in and get this line that made me laugh, because well...

a) humans are living creatures and b) the amount of microbial organisms on human skin is estimated to be at hundreds of billions, or more. And this kind of time travel/teleportation is always hinky because well if you think about it, how does that even work without getting into The Fly territory. I’m willing to cut this drama some slack here and maybe it’s an awkward translation besides. 

This gets... exceedingly long, but if you want a (too) in-depth summary of what happens in ep 1 and why it doesn’t work (for me) read on :D.

But then the real trouble starts, because PSH’s dad (I’m not bothering to learn the character names) says he’s not going with her and this is apparently very sudden. He then makes her repeat some lines that are supposed to create tension? Be exposition? Idk.

“Don’t trust anyone.” 

“Don’t get involved with [CSW]’s character.”

PSH get’s teary eyed, because her dad is not coming with her, but the problem with scenes like these is: I don’t know either of them and do not have an emotional connection to their parting. Sure, it tells us something about PSH (she likes her dad and is worried about him) but I also don’t know how important her dad is going to be down the line. So when PSH asks about her mom and what if her mom dies and her dad just replies everyone dies at some point I’m a bit weirded out, but not to the point where I necessarily want to know more. 

We then smashcut to PSH waking up in a world that’s more similar to ours and she does what her dad told her to do. She grabs her (very inconvenient) suitcase and runs along the tracks she woke up next to. We see that she is somewhat surprised by the running trains and also hardy enough to track on despite bleeding feet. 

Alas, creepy people in gas-masks with guns and drones are waiting for her, so she runs even harder and after some near misses (they are able to track her by some sort of radiation meter) makes it to safety. 

On top of a train car that the TWO DOZEN PEOPLE WITH GUNS AND DRONES are too stupid to check apparently. Clearly if she’s not under the train car, the detecting devices must be mistaken. So she just chills on top of the train car, sitting on her suitcase and those goons trundle off after 5 minutes presumably like they’re Assassin’s Creed Enemy NPCs.

Now we get introduced to CSW in the most insane scene i’ve ever witnessed. Honestly. 

He is just ~chilling in 1st class in an airplane, filming a douche who is rude to the plane staff and epically owning him because he’s So Smart.

First of all, I don’t know what that has to do with soggy noodles(which the other asshole complained about), since by that measure the noodles should be *undercooked* (lower boiling point means longer cooking time after all) and secondly good lord I already hate this guy. He then proceeds to Epically Own (tm) with a convenient Forbes (sorry “Eorbes”) Magazine that he is on the cover of and flirts with the plane hostess. 

So right off the bat, our impressions of CSW are supposed to be: He’s Cool (look at his hoodie and general bearing), he’s Smart (debatable), he’s nice to The Help (I guess???) stands up to bullies, and most importantly he’s fucking rich. I guess we’re also supposed to get the impression that he’s arrogant, maybe a bit of an asshole, but still cool and everything. 

If this had been where the scene had stopped I would have rolled my eyes and then just continued on watching. But no, the writers thought: “Schooling some sexist rich asshole isn’t enough to show off how Cool and Smart and Cocky our main character is. Also he likes the ladies.” Look at him, he’s Tony Stark only from South Korea!!!

So shortly after he sits down, and we have the first moment with CSW where he connected with me emotionally (he sees the ghost of his dead brother and the way he says “because ... you’re dead.” and I thought OOOH this I can work with), the cockpit windshield is hit by what looks to be a suitcase (DUN DUN DUUUN) and something crashes into one of the engines, causing it to explode and catch fire. 

The pilot is knocked out and unconscious and even the co-pilot loses consciousness (after conveniently unlocking the cockpit lock). CSW is the only one who goes to check on the pilots, having grabbed a fanny pack from his onboard luggage and quickly assessing the situation he revives the copilot and welds the hole in the windshield shut with some ducttape out of his fannypack and a plastic notepad. IT’S VERY EFFECTIVE! They did it in WW2, or so CSW tells us so you know it’s true.

I’m not sure that ‘s how plane windshields and duct tape and plastic notepad thingies work, but well the plane is still in freefall we have more important things to worry about :).

The electrics are all on the fritz, the copilot cannot get control of the plane and so CSW takes a seat in the captains chair (having foisted the captain out of it, not even he is so crass to sit on some unconscious dude’s lap i guess) and quickly calculates that they have 3 min and 30 secs for CSW to restart the electronics before the plane crashes. So he hands the co-pilot HIS PHONE with a timer on it for 3.5 minutes so the co-pilot can tell him when 30 seconds have passed. Instead of idk, contacting Air Traffic Control or ANYONE he just sits there and lets his big boy brain work. 

After 30 seconds he has an idea, because he’s Tony Stark-ing it up like crazy now and can just figure out the electronics of a plane cockpit in 30 seconds, but guess what. HIS PHONE RINGS. AND HE ANSWERS IT, because he’s devil-may-care and “haha look at this, friend, i’m in the cockpit of a crashing plane we have 2 minutes before i’m dead.”

Said friend is calling him from the board meeting of CSWs company, bc of course the board is ~unhappy with CSWs antics (I gotta say I can’t blame them) and the friend doesn’t believe it at first, when he says he’s in a crashing plane, but checks on the news to see it’s true. 

I ... I don’t think news work like that, we’ve gone 5 minutes from the initial troubles till now, there won’t be news reports all over the media yet. THEY’RE NOT EVEN TALKING TO AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL YET. Hell he even tells his friend to call 119 or the airport for help. I just... I’m very forgiving of a lot of things in a drama when it comes to writing. I’m willing to ignore obvious blindspots in a narrative, if I think the narrative is strong enough to support whatever it’s trying to say. At this point what could calling the police or the airport do, they have like 90 seconds left...

I don’t know what the writers are trying to tell me with this scene though? It’s so stupid, so unrealistic and CSW is so unpleasant and weird in it, because he tells his friend that he has to confess to taking out the friend’s college girlfriend on a date while they were still together. 

Well since the drama is longer than one ep, they do make it out alive, but the fact that the co-pilot managed to safely LAND the plane (which is insane to me) gets skipped over and we just get news snippets that herald CSW as a hero who singlehandedly saved the planes passengers. 

We then get to see him in his natural habitat “convalescing” in his giant apartment where he is being showered with gifts by worshippers basically. He continues to be an asshole, but his friend tells him, one more stunt and the board will kick him. 

The board will kick the guy who just saved a plane full of lives????? Yeah right, I’m sorry but that’s just fucking stupid from the writers. Why would anyone do that, even if the board hates him, kicking him now, when he’s literally a national hero would be the worst thing they could do for the stock prices. It’s only here so the writers can shoehorn in that CSW is close to OD-ing on pharmaceuticals and that the board wants to monitor his therapy and they have a way of “forcing” him to comply. 

Also he has what looks to be a dental x-ray machine next to his bed. Someone correct me if I’m wrong but lol what’s up with these set design choices. 

His friend tells him to go to fucking therapy or else and the next scene he is actually at a therapist. 

Who’s his ex-girlfriend (they have a whole tangent about that).

Who writes a report about his therapy to the board. 

But hey at least the therapy gets us a flashback of the last time he saw his brother. Big surprise he was an asshole to him as well, so no wonder he’s traumatised by that.

After therapy he *conveniently* runs into the co-pilot who’s incoherent and beaten up and hands CSW a usb-drive. It contains video of the cockpit on the day of the crash and it’s obvious what struck the plane was a suitcase and what crashed into the engine was a human being (DUN DUN DUUUUUUN maybe someone forgot to convert feet to meters when setting up the time travel thingamabob).

As he looks at the (very pixelated) figure of the person about to crash into the engine, he suddenly sees his brother’s face and honestly this scene just made me laugh? I know it’s supposed to be haunting and more evidence of CSW’s deep trauma, but I guess at this point my brain was just completely checked out. 

And that’s what we end our introductory phase of CSW. What the fuck was that plane thing even for. To show us he’s callous in the face of danger? He’s an asshole even when he’s about to die, so he’s got a long way to go? He’s haunted by the spectre of his dead brother and the guilt he feels for not being there when he died? I got a lot of that before we had the insane Plane Adventure!!! There are literally millions of ways they could have gotten this information to the viewers and not made an absurd spectacle of the plot that means that everything afterwards just feels lame, because you already had the insanity that was this plane ride, so it can only go down tension wise.

Now we’re back to PSH, but honestly her parts are kinda boring and bog-standard “UwU I’m unfamiliar with this way of life, I don’t even know how to eat a banana (that looks *nothing* like a banana btw), so I just eat it peel and root and all. Also I’m from the Future, that means I obviously know todays LOTTERY NUMBERS.”

I know kdramas like clichés and tropes, I like them too, that’s why I watch kdramas, but you gotta give me a bit more if you want me to at least invest in PSH, because I’m sure as hell not invested in CSW. 

She gets taken in by some guy, because we can’t have her homeless all the time, and she needs someone to explain this world to her and also how to eat bananas properly and she opens her suitcase. It’s got both future-tech-y looking stuff and a pink notepad that seems to hold specific information on what needs to happen on certain days. 

She also makes this expression and I don’t know if we’re supposed to laugh because she’s not threatening or if we’re supposed to laugh because she’s not threatening, but we know she’s gonna kick ass later, haha you just thought she was harmless. I gotta say it’s the former for me.

Rarrr fierce Elite Warrior PSH coming to get you.

She tries to get in touch with CSW, already breaking one of her dad’s three commandments. Oh, I guess staying with this guy breaks the other two. Welp, so much for that then. What even was the point of that first scene...

Anyway she tries to get in touch with CSW but ofc you cant just call the richest person ever (Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos would get very angry voicemails from me if that were the case), but she manages to get his voicemail. Or a voicemail he spoke for. But oh no, she is just Not Familiar with this world and keeps having a conversation with the voicemail as if it’s CSW himself. 

CSW who has scienced his way to finding the suitcase that crashed the plane and as she begs his voicemail not to open the suitcase, of course he opens it and gasp the combination for the suitcase lock is his birthday!!! Something his brother used to do!!! 

MAYBE THAT MAN WAS HIS BROTHER AFTER ALL!!!! OH NO!! 

But thank fuck the episode is over now.

VERDICT:

Just no. Don’t do this. The latter half of the show is more standard fare, but the first 25 minutes destroy any capability of this show making sense. I can see what the writers are trying to do, but it’s so hamfisted and badly written I’m just not willing to go along.

If you want a show that also has a fantasy action aspect (and this show is all fantasy no matter how much it tries to science it up), watch LUCA instead. That show at least knows how to set a tone, how to get us invested in the characters and does exposition in a way that doesn’t feel obtrusive. 

[fly-pow-bye]

DuckTales 2017 - “Beaks in the Shell!”

Story by: Francisco Angones, Madison Bateman, Colleen Evanson, Christian Magalhaes, Bob Snow

Written by: Ben Siemon

Storyboard by: Sam King, Kathryn Marusik, Stephan Park, Emmy Cicirega

Directed by: Jason Zurek

We go virtual!

The episode begins with GizmoDuck and Huey chasing after Gandra Dee, who just stole a cube that causes shockwaves. While he does end up grabbing the massive short circuit-causing cube before it drops into Duckburg's water, Gandra Dee ends up getting away in the end. He wasn't really too competent in this quest, either, as he got caught in a trap and he had to be told by Huey that he can fly out of them. Huey's like someone who yells at the TV when a plot hole happens. Whether this failure is because GizmoDuck is still not as competent as he wants to be or something else is not too obvious, but anyone who watched the previous major Gandra Dee episode can guess that something would have affected his crime fighting when it comes to Gandra Dee.

Back in Gyro Gearloose's lab, Fenton Crackshell-Cabrera has another project in the works that is a secret from everyone: a new virtual reality cloud space that is both a space for scientific collaboration and a potential romantic destination. Let's just say that it may as well have been that something else, and that something else is hidden from everyone else, including his own M'Ma, about as well as his secret identity. Not that he was going to tell his special someone that they didn't buy it.

We go into the aforementioned virtual reality cloud space, where Gandra Dee is already generating beakers full of green chemicals, the universal sign of science in children's cartoons. They can also kiss under the happy little pixelated trees, because they are still an item despite Gandra Dee's record of blinding children and threatening to short-circuit all of Duckburg. Fenton is almost ready to share this scientific breakthrough to the world, but Dee doesn't want to do that because she thinks people would shut it down because of all the purple glitches. This plot point made me wonder if there was going to be something more than just "oh, Gyro can fix those", like if they were going to be a major part of the plot, or that it was supposed to represent that this romance is not going to last.

We later learn that this cloud is also important because they can do dangerous experiments without worry of injury, and, combined with their ability to generate anything they can imagine, this could be a good set-up to an interesting creativity vs. creativity battle. Maybe the purple glitches will come to life as monsters, or maybe FOWL will find out what's going on here and invade it with their own creativity. I mean, who else would have the idea to invade this Gizmotopia?

Fenton: (putting his arms around his one true love) This is going to be...

Mark Beaks: ...the greatest scientific achievement in his-zizz-tory!

Oh, it's Mark Beaks advertising a new Waddle phone update that partially fixes a bug that makes the phones explode into flames. Granted, there's no hint that there's going to be any convergence between these two plots besides Beaks coincidentally finishing Fenton's sentence, with an extra "zizz", but, really, it's inevitable.

Now, Waddle only has one investor, and the investor tells the CEO that he has to come up with an original idea, which he simply can't do as every idea he can come up with, like coffee cups with apps, was already taken. This isn't really the episode's B-plot, and, as said before, it's pretty much a foregone conclusion that he's just going to give up and attempt to steal whatever Gyro or his intern are doing. One other thing that's a bit confusing is that nobody seems to recognize Mark Beaks anymore despite being the CEO of a company that apparently still makes phones a lot of people use. It could work as another sign that his company is going down, and that's why he seems so desperate here.

Meanwhile, Huey ends up barging into Fenton's office with a new discovery about Gandra Dee that could lead to her capture, only to see Fenton doing a kissy face while wearing his GizmoDuck helmet. He puts two-and-two together and realizes this must be some sort of virtual reality cloud space. Fenton tries to get him away from that by saying that the GizmoDuck helmet only works on his head, and he just does not have any additional VR headsets for guests. Manny the Headless Horse makes his appearance in this episode with a bunch of VR headsets, apparently hearing that excuse as a request for those, and Huey comes into the world to marvel at all of its wonders, including that very special guest.

Gandra Dee: What...the...f...

Huey: FOWL?!

I see what they did there. Gandra has to generate a weighted blanket to calm Huey down after that revelation. At first, I was going to make some joke about how this is a really bad way for the Duke of Making A Mess to go out, but it makes sense. Stress will be one of the major parts of Huey's part of the plot, and weighted blankets are a good way to relieve that. It's also another reminder that this is a world where ideas can come to life, even if it's just a virtual one. I would question how a virtual weighted blanket would work, but this episode does seem to go with the "one's mind makes it real" scenario.

As Huey keeps asking questions on why Gandra Dee is working with Fenton, we get the little sad backstory on Gandra Dee courtesy of her generating a flashback of her losing a science fair to someone making that one volcano experiment. People just don't understand that she wants to push the boundaries of science with...okay, I'm not sure what that is supposed to be, but it does shoot a dangerous death ray. Because of her experiments need for danger, she can only do experiments on herself, which is why she happens to be a cyborg, and the only people who would fund her work happens to be people like the evil buzzard bent on world domination. She adds an additional comfort to Huey that she already plans to quit FOWL for good after using their resources to make this. After making puppy dog eyes at the little kid like a little kid makes puppy dog eyes at their parents, Huey accepts this for the sake of both science and love.

This leads into our actual B-plot: Huey trying his hardest to keep a secret, and his anxiousness and stress is really getting the best of him even in the beginning. One of the first people he has to confront is none other than Fenton's M'Ma, who, despite Fenton's words to Gandra Dee, did not buy that his project was not some sort of romantic exploit. This leads to an interrogation scene. Crackshell then shows up before M'Ma could actually interrogate him further, and Huey has to try to motion to him what exactly his lies were. It's the usual set up for plots like this, the guy gets caught up in the lie, and he tries desperately to keep the secret a secret. There's not a lot that I haven't seen before, but I can not say this is bad, either.

One creative thing they do end up doing is the very next scene where, after Huey "goes to the bathroom", Huey comes in a room with confidence to answer the big question on why Fenton would keep secrets from his own M'Ma. Eventually, he has to bail again after hearing that one of the secrets is that Fenton is GizmoDuck. Why? Because that was actually Louie playing the part of Huey, and somehow, the schemer of the three nephews is the last person in Duckburg to know GizmoDuck's secret identity. He tries to go back only for M'Ma to ask "Huey" about "Louie's Kids", that fake charity he had in The Other Bin, and Louie cracks under pressure and reveals Huey put him up to it. Huey runs to Fenton's house to essentially yell out that he can't take hiding this secret about the GizmoCloud anymore, thinking the only person in there is a still-in-the-GizmoCloud Fenton. He has no reason to believe there's any desperate CEOs hiding in the wastebasket.

We cut back and forth between this plot and the "Gandra Dee not wanting to open the GizmoCloud" plot, and it turns out to be more about her than anything else. We get the lines about how she doesn't want the world to think of her badly, and how he doesn't care what they think about her, and this heartfelt moment doesn't last too long. Mark Beaks may not be a creative man, but he at least knows how to hack into things. Honestly, it seems like this world didn't have that much security to begin with.

Mark Beaks shows up, locking them in a hashtag captcha before Gandra Dee can defeat him with the combined power of a Terry Bogard power wave and a Rolling Stones reference, and he decides he's going to use his new "WaddleCloud" to steal other people's ideas without anyone telling him. Fenton can still use his creativity powers, and he tries to do that to summon the GizmoDuck suit...only for Mark Beak's stealing powers to take it right from him, giving him the power suit and the ability to add Waddle logos to all the buildings in the skybox.

Fenton Crackshell can still use his creativity abilities to sneakily motion his hands to tap Morse code for help. By the way, yes, he is comatose. It's just like Sword Art Online or that one episode of Black Mirror. Also, how lucky that the one person taking a stress rest in the room, Huey, happened to know Morse code. He tries to take the VR headset out of Mark Beak's head, only for it to give him an electric shock, and the computer displays a little Mark Beaks head telling him that, "ah, ah, ah, you didn't say the magic word." I'm not going to give any hate on this episode for lazy references. If anything, this joke is perfectly fitting for Mark Beaks.

All of this convinces Huey that he doesn't need to keep the secret anymore, which pretty much ends the B-plot with him just randomly yelling out to a mail carrier about how Mark Beaks hacked into the GizmoCloud. He then says he's going to find people who can actually help. It's like he's aware what he did made no sense. Before GizmoDuck can use his finger lasers to delete Fenton and Gandra from the program, or whatever that would entail, his world is suddenly invaded by Huey, M'Ma, and Gyro. How did they manage to get in this hostile cloud takeover when it's implied Mark Beaks put Dennis Nedry-levels of security on it? Pineapples. Well, or Gyro helped them. Either way, it's not really explained.

It may seem like I didn't like this episode that much, so I'll say one thing I did like a lot besides the Louie scene: the weekly final fight scene all of that buildup led up to. The people all use their creativity in a pretty cool way here that I won't entirely spoil here. I also like how Mark Beaks' lack of creativity fits into what he does in it; he just combines everyone else's ideas into a super robot form. I was expecting him to fall over due to so many conflicting ideas, but they end up doing something else that was also pretty funny. Funny by Mark Beaks standards, anyway.

It's not much of a spoiler to say that the good guys win, but there is a little bit more to the ending. Namely, there is a major cliffhanger at the end of the episode. While it's a good cliffhanger, It does feel a little disappointing that a character that was built up in this episode essentially becomes a mere damsel in distress. Then again, I felt the same way about Lena in The Other Bin before the big revelation about her in The Shadow War. We'll just have to see what happens.

How does it stack up?

There's some good scenes here and there, like the blanket, the Louie scene, and the final fight scene, but with everything else, I just found it mediocre by DuckTales 2017's high standards. I'd put it below New Gods On The Block, which has a fight scene similar to this one, and I didn't really love that one either. I can see people disagreeing with this one, especially if they were really into Gandra Dee or Mark Beaks, and I'm sure the last minute of the episode is going to lead to somewhere fascinating. I really debated on whether or not this should be the first two Scrooges episode of Season 3, and I originally gave this a 2 just because I didn't think it was as great as everyone else thought it was. However, I then thought about some of the episode I would give a 2, and I think the good scenes in this episode are just too good to give the whole package a two.

Long story short, Three Scrooges.

Next, we meet some friends for life, through thick or thin, with plenty of tales to spin.

← How Santa Stole Christmas! 🦆 The Lost Cargo of Kit Cloudkicker! →

[loopy777]

following up on your wastly superios republic city, how would you rewrite asami's role in this new city, the city related plot, and her relationship with korra?(i cannot imagine you'dd want to keep the terrible love trialngle for this story). do you think opening their relationship on a romantic note with clear attraction from the start or have it develop more slowly over the course of the first book would better?

I don’t usually talk much about Asami here on Tumblr because I have lots of criticisms of her character and Korrasami, and this site enables such things to be passed along out of context and co-opted for agenda-driven bashing. I don’t think Asami or Korrasami are any worse than any of LoK’s other failures, and at least it’s bad writing for a good cause. Unlike Iroh II, who's just bad writing. Heyo!

Also, I’ve mainly been thinking about Book Air with all my talk of Republic City, but discussing the development of the dynamic between Korra and Asami is going to take us beyond that, and so outside of Republic City.

So let’s see how much I can answer this question without stepping over my self-imposed line.

First of all, I would introduce Asami independently of Mako, and you’re right, I wouldn’t bother with a love triangle. I don’t like that LoK ended on a romantic moment for either Book Air's climax or the finale finale, because the whole first episode is completely devoid of romantic matters or potential suitors. It’s one thing for AtLA, where Katara provides the opening narration and Aang’s crush on her is established at their first meeting; their getting together is the culmination of their respective coming-of-age arcs, which is why Book Fire stretches Kataang out so much and so nonsensically.

Korra's journey is never really about romance. It’s about seeing the world and making connections; Tenzin, her guide into the wider world, is the one who narrates the opening to her story. So I’d expect her final scene to be about all the friends she’d made and her place in the world, not a single romance and a vacation to the Spirit World. But Korra’s main character arc is over by the end of Book Spirits, anyway, so I can understand just ripping off AtLA for something feel-good. Also, considering the limitations in what could be shown, I guess they wanted as many parallels to AtLA as possible to make sure everyone got that Korra and Asami are romantic.

So, with the benefit of hindsight and the goal of endgame Korrasami, we can introduce Asami earlier to give her proper prominence. In the first episode, while careening through the city, Korra encounters Asami. There is no blushing or giggling or anything when Korra and Asami meet, because that's not how Korra or Asami react to attraction. I'm thinking we can replace the whole thing with the hobo and the illegal fishing, since that material can be covered later; perhaps Asami buys Korra food when she sees Korra has no money? But before they can exchange names, something happens that sends them off on a short adventure, and then they get separated.

In episode 2, instead of encountering Mako and Bolin while trying to break out of Air Island to see Probending, Korra encounters Asami again. Asami is likewise sneaking out to see Probending, and she’s a parallel to Korra in that she’s a victim of social isolation. Asami recognized Korra, gives a shout, and they exchange names and bond as fellow probender-geeks. Once that’s done, the girls somehow wind up meeting Mako and Bolin, Korra gets the chance to join the team, etc. Asami would help convince Mako to let Korra play. The end result is Korra with a big group of friends, no romantic hints about anyone (other than maybe Bolin having the hots for her, a situation that will be temporary), and an explicit connection between Korra starting to ‘get’ Airbending and the perspectives offered by her new friends. Perhaps Mako or Bolin shout some advice that gets the circle-walking to click for her, or it could be another thing for Asami to do.

This would be explicit foreshadowing for the Book Air finale, where Korra uses Airbending for the first time to defeat Amon. But instead of Mako being the one in danger, it’s all Korra’s friends, and the scene would be set up as an explicit parallel to the one in the second episode. Korra achieves freedom through her connections, people who show her new sides of herself and the world.

But we're getting ahead of ourselves. For most of Book Air, I think Asami and Korra can be partners in discovering Republic City. The Bending Brothers can introduce them to some new element, and the girls react to it in similar but disparate ways. Asami can sometimes be a bit of a snob, while Korra can be more into getting dirty or eating nasty food or belching or whatever. But they still do get moments of going to a dance hall together, getting pulled into street racing together, helping each other chase the corruption out of Probending, etc. Still, a little distance comes between the two, as Korra starts to see herself connecting better with the boys, especially Bolin. If we want to deal with Bolin trying to woo Korra and it not working out, this is the place to do it.

However, rather than romance and a love triangle, the main conflict between Korra’s Krew is Asami being courted by the Equalists. As I said in my other post, rather than the Equalists kicking things off with criminal activity and a direct confrontation with Korra, I’d like them to be a running subplot that only explodes at the end of the season. I think Asami could be a good viewpoint character into that, as she starts to learn and hear about the Equalists- and it will eventually be revealed that Hiroshi has been setting this up for her, to manipulate her. Remember, in my vision, he’s the one who got Amon to adopt the rhetoric of saving the oppressed by eliminating Benders.

It starts with Asami thinking it’s silly, then she starts to acknowledge that they have some good points even if they’re wrong about being against all Benders. Perhaps Asami explains to Korra about some of the good points, and Korra is skeptical but admits that the Bender gangs are a problem. I think this should come to a head in a similar manner to the cartoon when Hiroshi comes under some kind of suspicion. Instead of getting tangled in the love triangle, Mako and Bolin side with Korra right away, and Asami starts to wonder if the Benders really are oppressing her. She knows she’s sheltered and naive, and Hiroshi puts into her head that Korra and the Bending Brothers have been taking advantage of her sweetness and wealth. Asami's been paying for all their adventures, after all, and the others seem closer to each other than to her.

It still ends with Hiroshi’s villainy being revealed, and Asami siding with good guys over him. But here, it’s about Asami siding with her friends, rather than just Mako. This is all still without romance, but it’s laying the seeds.

Things continue on from there, and the only major change I feel the need to call out is that the team doesn’t split up for the final battle. They’re all together, and as I said, Korra has to save all her friends with Airbending. And there's no Iroh II, because he's just boring pointless fan-service who detracts from the other characters.

For Book Spirits, I’d toss out Asami’s whole subplot. I used to have an epic post on ASN (which I saved) describing how it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever, but you can just take my word on it for now. If we do something similar to my Spiritual Eco-Terrorist Unalaq idea, then we can turn Asami’s part of bringing Korra back away from extremism into a parallel of Korra convincing Asami to turn against the Equalists. This book also sees a minimizing of Mako and Bolin, since part of the story is going to take place outside of Republic City. Asami has more reason to leave, so she emerges as Korra’s strongest friend in this book. Bolin could still get mixed up Varrick, if we want to do that subplot, but we’re completely skipping the whole thing of Varrick trying to steal Asami’s company. It's just filler, and the themes of Book Spirits deserve more focus.

Instead, we say that Asami has been steadily rebuilding up Sato Industries in the background of Book Spirits, so she’s in a position to leave it running when she goes with Korra on the Airbender Recruitment Tour. Again, I’m thinking we leave Mako and Bolin behind. Or, if Bolin went off with Varrick at the end of Book Spirits, as I suggested in that Unalaq post, either just Mako is left behind or else he goes with the girls to try to get over his brother being gone. They support him during his loss, and he maybe develops a real bond with Jinora’s future boyfriend, Whatshisname, rather than that subplot being unceremoniously dropped. Eventually, Bolin and Varrick would come back into the story, although maybe not until Book Balance.

Also, Book Change is where we start to have Korra and Asami blushing at each other and making surprising vows of devotion to each other. As Korra explores romance, in parallel to Jinora, we could get some advice from Tenzin and maybe even discussion of how Aang changed the nature of Air Nomad culture by accepting the idea of family units. At the end, when Korra is injured and Asami practically proposes marriage, it won’t come out of left field; it will feel like a culmination. And Korra gives an explicit refusal, our cliffhanger for that subplot.

Hm, perhaps we can also properly introduce Kuvira while we’re here? She can join the Krew as an ally and friend, and part of what has Asami starting to think about Korra as something more than a friend is that Kuvira is explicitly trying to seduce Korra for fun. That might be amusing. Or it could be stupid. It is a love triangle, after all. It's easy enough to cut if we can't make it work, even if the voice actresses have already recorded their lines.

Anyway, as we launch into our final season, Korra starts to recover to find that the Metalbending chick who was (maybe) trying to seduce her is now leading an imperialist conquest of the Earth Kingdom, and also a new Amon is back in Republic City trying to bring down the government. This new Amon is a creation of Kuvira, to give her an excuse to invade the United Republic as a pacifying force. Korra and Asami have to bring down Amon II, and then also Kuvira. It’s very tragic that they have to beat up their former friend, but not too tragic because it turns out that Kuvira is a real jerk.

Timing-wise, as I mentioned in my Hiroshi post, he dies saving Asami from Amon II. This happens before the final battle, so we get to see Asami mourning for a bit as she and Korra go after Kuvira in a new sub-arc. She emerges ready to confess her love to Korra. They get together, and then Korra rallies all her friends and allies across the world to defeat Kuvira and restore freedom to the galaxy. The end sees Korra and Asami together, as romantic partners, amidst all their friends. The End. Huzzah!

Hopefully, that showed how a functional Korrasami arc could be done that makes good use of their characters and frees them from the really janky storytelling that plagues most of LoK. Most of the problem is that LoK seemed intent on giving Asami something separate to do, rather than properly integrating her into things. For all that the storytellers claim to like Asami and Korrasami, it's stunning how little of either -- even in terms of friendship -- there is to the plots and story arcs.

Ah, but there's the line. I shall now back off, rather than crossing it. Yay for me.

[sailor-cresselia]

Zero One 04: Watch out for incoming lore!

(And for incoming Riders and rocket fists.)

So, I’ve been having a lot of trouble freeing up the brain power to actually, y’know, even get myself to watch this week. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to, it’s just that I’m completely drained. So, this might not go as in-depth as I have in the past.

On a lore episode.

Ah well.

––

We’re starting this episode off with a bang – almost literally. The trip Aruto and Izu are on is to observe Anna, a tourguide HumaGear. At first, he’s still having fun, because, y’know, it’s a bus tour.

And then Anna announces that they’re coming up to the site of a significant event.

Aruto’s excitement drops off.

He was there, after all.

In Daybreak Town.

(One of the young boys who is also on the trip grows just as serious, looking down in the same way Aruto is.)

––

It turns out that Daybreak Town was a collaboration between the Japanese government, Hiden Intelligence, and a number of other corporations to design a city run by HumaGears. It was also where they launched the satellite from, the one that controls them.

We get treated to a diagram of several of the company logos spreading across the city, implying that they each were in charge of a district, before a ‘blueprint’ of the satellite.

I don’t like the phrasing said blueprint uses for some of the data readouts. There’s “Core Unit”, which is fine. The two “M-Wheels” are probably short for Motion, and what keep it stable. The section labeled “Life Line” is a little concerning. And I really, really, wish that Toei had chosen literally anything else for the bottom one, which reads “Slave Analyzer.”

Like, I know this is a Japanese show, and the kids probably aren’t going to be able to read it, but their parents? MAYBE! And since we’re dealing with ‘robots’ who are slowly gaining sentience… yeah. I’m not comfortable with this at all.

ANYWAY. Let’s leave the sub-text issues, and into the real-text issues, shall we?

And it sure is an issue!

Like I mentioned before I got off track, the city was an attempt to design an urban center run by HumaGears, as well as all sorts of research projects, including the satellite.

But 12 years ago, there was an accident in the Research and Development sector. It’s shown as a wide view of the city, showing just how large the explosion was – and it was big. And bright blue. You know. The same type of blue flame that we see in Aruto’s flashbacks.

But the damage didn’t stay in R&D for long, and it spread to the power infrastructure. In the end, the entire city was wiped out.

Even 12 years later, nobody is allowed in.

––

Back in the present, we see Anna and the school tour (and Aruto and Izu) at a viewing platform, with a view of the lake that the city has become.

At one very smug looking students prompting, Anna explains that the theory is that the incident was likely caused by faulty maintenance.

Aruto looks away, remembering how Isamu had said that the truth was covered up, that HumaGears had gone on a murderous rampage.

Nobody sees a certain hooded not-Gremlin approach the bus driver, tapping on the window with a Zetsumeriser and Zetsumerise Key.

Two kids start mocking one of their classmates, the one who had gotten as serious as Aruto earlier, saying that it was his dad’s fault, because he was the one in charge of the factory. One of them says that his dad blew the whole thing up.

The bus explodes behind them.

The bus driver, the soon-to-be-overwritten Bāsu, pulls out his key and ‘transforms.’ I know that his name is basically ‘bus’, but Rider Wiki also romanizes it as ‘Burs’, which I can only assume is because of his incredibly massive sideburns. Like, dang, those are big.

But we don’t have Bāsu for much longer, because he becomes the Onycho Magia, based off of the Onychonycteris, the most primitive form of bat. Interestingly, it may have been diurnal. The fossil record is inconclusive so far, but it may not have had the adaptations to echolocate, or the enlarged eyes that nocturnal bats have.

Something I’ve noticed is that most of the species that have been used as Magia so far have something in common aside from all being extinct: They’re mostly comparatively recent discoveries, and there are very few fossils that have been found of them. Just something I thought might be worth noting for the future.

Also, Onycho has huge claws on his ‘normal’ hands and also on each finger of his wings – remember, bat wings are technically webbed hands. Those ridges are fingers. Onychonycteris had claws on each finger, unlike modern bats, who only have two or three.

As Aruto yells for the kids to get out of there, Jin sits on top of a retaining wall, kicking his legs idly, and asks Onycho – who can’t hear him, anyway – to kill some humans for him.

Whenever he says that to his Magia… that’s the only time he’s really serious. That’s the only time he drops the smile.

Interesting.

––

After the OP, which I love, we cut to Onycho pursuing the tour group through a wooded area, Aruto herding the kids along. One of them, the one who was being mocked earlier, trips. As Onycho catches up, Aruto prepares to transform – but doesn’t get to do more than pull out his belt before shots are fired  from another direction. He hurriedly hides it behind his back as Isamu and Yua show up on scene – somehow – and transform.

Of note, Isamu still has to force his Key open, and he’s still punching the bullet. Yua has no such issue, and just lets her armor form, before they go on the offensive.

She’s still quick and efficient, while he’s more of a wildcard whose primary mood is ‘gun.’

Onycho quickly gets out of range when he goes to hang upside down on a high branch, and then flies away. (There’s an ‘analyzing’ sound effect as Izu watches him fly off.)

The two agents detransform as they go up to Aruto, the boy, and the two functioning HumaGear. Isamu points out that ‘Oh, look, Hiden’s president is here. Again.’ But the boy, who’s been sitting on the ground, curls in on himself, saying something about wondering why this is happening to him.

Both Isamu and Aruto look at him in concern.

––

Back in Aruto’s office, we have Aruto, Izu, Anna, Isamu, and the boy. Said boy’s name is Sakurai Gou, and his father was one of the victims 12 years ago.

I can’t help but wonder just how many people died that day.

Especially when Gou says that people have always told him that it’s his fathers fault it happened. That’s an awful lot of weight on a teen’s shoulders. And, Isamu, I know you mean well, but I don’t think that’s quite the way to go about reassuring a kid that it’s not his dad’s fault. Usually, people don’t react well to someone saying that it was HumaGears, who were designed to kill.

Although, Gou seems to take Isamu’s claim that it was HumaGear who leveled the factory in stride.

Isamu, of course, doesn’t take Izu’s statement that ‘there are no records to back up his claim’ very well., yelling that it’s because it was covered up.

Anna points out that the consensus is that it was caused by faulty maintenance.

Aruto looks down as he wonders if the concensus is the same things as the truth.

Anna watches him, just like she’d watched Isamu during his claim that Daybreak happened because of the HumaGear.

––

Outside, Isamu and Gou are leaving, and Gou says that he wants to know the truth.

Isamu asks if he really feels that way, and when Gou nods… he says that he does, too.

“Hey, kid, want to go break into a secured area?”

––

Ohhhh, man, I like Serious Aruto.

He’s flat out interrogating Jun, asking what happened at their factory 12 years ago.

But all that Jun will say is that he can’t recall.

Anna and Izu both call him out on this – not activating their look-up functions, by the way. Anna asks why there’s no record of the HumaGear uprising. Which implies that she knows there was one, somehow. Izu says that a cover-up seems intentional.

Aruto knows he’s hiding something, the way that Jun is so nervous makes that pretty clear. And he’s not a comedic nervous, like we’d expect from his characterization in the first three episodes. No, he’s scared… and maybe ashamed. Especially given how, as he takes his leave, he says that ‘sometimes, the way business works means that you have to keep the truth in the shadows.’

So, there’s definitely at least one layer of cover-up here. Probably more than one, in fact. This is written by the same guy as Ex-Aid, after all.

––

Later on, Anna and Aruto – without Izu, it would seem – are basically confirming to each other that they want to find out the truth.

Anna is looking into this because, as a bus guide, it’s her duty to know the historical facts of her tour. It’s her duty to make sure the truth is known.

Aruto says that he guesses they’re going back to Daybreak Town then. After all, he’s the president. He can’t ignore an employee in need.

He’s not saying that he wants to know, too. Not out loud, anyway.

––

The next day, at the entrance to Daybreak Town, Gou and Isamu are… actually breaking into a secured area. I mean, it was a foregone conclusion, but I didn’t think they’d be this blatant about it. Isamu’s even got a huge bag with him, probably with some sort of camera equipment or something. They’re not alone, though, when Yua steps in front of the gate, asking what they think they’re doing.

What they think they’re doing is that they’re going to find the truth.

She sighs. She’s not going to be able to stop them, is she? So, Yua pulls out a grey Progrise Key, and offers it to Isamu. She does say that it’s ‘high performance’, and he probably won’t be able to use it. He asks why she’s giving it to him, then, which is a valid question.

Yua just warns him to not forget what his job is.

Isamu takes the Punching Kong key, tucks it into his suit jacket, and takes off his tie, smirking. “Actually, I’m off duty today.”

––

As Isamu and Gou are about to set out on an inflatable motorboat – which appears to somehow be what he had in that giant bag – Gou isn’t sure if they’ll really find anything by going out there, to which Isamu says that they’ll just have to try.

And then a bunch of Trilobite mooks come up – some of them still saying ‘intruder detected.’

See? This is what he means by a cover-up!

Isamu’s shooting some of them down, but one gets close to Gou-

And is tackled into the water by Aruto.

Isamu accuses him of being there to make sure they don’t see anything they aren’t supposed to, but Aruto shoots that down. (Heh.) He wants to know what happened, too.

Completely ignoring Izu’s protests about ‘protecting his secret identity,’ he pulls out his belt and stands next to Isamu.

“Do you want to die, get out of- wait what’s that belt?!”

Aruto, with his serious face on, promises, as Hiden’s president, that he’ll find the truth, and transforms.

Both Isamu and the Trilobites dodge the heck out of the way of that robot grasshopper – and yet he still can’t believe his eyes when he’s standing next to Zero One.

Aruto tells Anna to go with the two of them – it’s a tour guides job to make sure her guests get to their destination, after all. He takes over fighting the Trilobites, as they head out.

––

Ohhhh. I’ve just realized that comment I made earlier about the rarity of the species used for the Magia. I’m making a separate post right now, but I’m copy-pasting it in.  

The skeletal design of all the Magia isn’t just to make it easier to repurpose the suits - it’s because they’re all using extinct creatures as their base. They’re all fossils, themselves.

The main Magia, the corrupted ones with powers, are all powered by creatures that have relatively few examples in the fossil record.

The mooks, however, are Trilobites. This doesn’t just allow the anonymity factor with the shell acting as a mask.

Trilobites are incredibly common, and as such, make the perfect option for a swarm of faceless cannon fodder.

––

In the flooded ruins, Isamu, Gou, and Anna make their way to what used to be the control room of the factory, where Gou’s father worked.

It’s also where the explosion started.

Why… is Anna the one searching for things to help them find the truth? She explicitly says that she will look. That’s odd.

And why would the control room be where an explosion started? Why not, say, the factory floor, or a lab, or a test area?

Why the control center?

––

On the shore, Zero One handily dispatches the Trilobites with a Shark-powered Slash finisher. Much like his Impact finishers, it involves the sword summoning a giant hecking row of sharks teeth.

I love this seasons fights.

And here comes Onycho, swooping in with energy spheres to blast our hero back. Aruto tries to jump after him, to bring him down to the ground, but he can’t jump high enough on command to catch up to someone who’s continuing upward, and misses.

As he picks himself up, Izu throws him a Brand New Toy Progrize Key, which fortunately he catches. Y’know, unlike the unfortunate incident with the Attache Calibur in episode one.

WING

When the robo-bird is beamed down, it attacks Onycho for a while, before Aruto finally uses the key. And there are bright pink feathers fluttering around whenever it hits, too, which is really cool!

Fly to the sky! Flying Falcon!

Spread your wings and prepare for a force.

…We’re never going to see this form again.

Not with how Zero One immediately rises into the air, and doesn’t even try to land as he and Onycho start an aerial fight over the lake, swooping around the buildings, firing attacks, Aruto streaming pink and yellow energy effects with every movement.

This thing requires far too much CGI for us to see it more than… I’d say about one more time in-show, and maybe in one of the movies. Maybe.

This is GataKiriBa all over again.

Also, as he’s flying around, Izu waves, wishing him a safe trip.

Izu, I love you.

––

In the office, Gou’s given up. He can’t find anything… it must have been his fathers fault after all. Why bother looking any further?

…son of a- Toei named this kid Gou on purpose, didn’t they? I was initially thinking, ‘oh, hey, they’re reusing names, that’s nothing new.’ And then I just remembered that ‘Oh, right, the main Gou’s father actually was to blame for the robot uprising in Drive!’

Anyway, significant name reuse aside, the kid’s surrendered, but Isamu encourages him to keep looking.

And then the Trilobites show up. Even as he’s fighting them, Isamu keeps giving small!Gou a pep talk. It can’t have been his fathers fault, it was the HumaGear! So if you don’t believe in him, who will?

Isamu, I get it, but, uh, maybe don’t take this much of this particular trait from Mach? The one where you say that a human can’t have be to blame, it’s the out of control robots? I’m just saying. I doubt this kids father in particular was to blame, but I’m pretty sure at least one human was very heavily involved in what happened here.

Looking at you, Grandpa Hiden. You are very much not above suspicion.

Isamu’s statement, as he is getting very beaten up, that “if you stop now, it’s all over, so raise your head and keep going’ seems to be as much to himself as it is to Gou.

And he’s getting very beaten up, so he pulls out the Punching Kong key.

I’m pretty sure that not only did Yua not unlock it, he’s also opening them wrong. I know that’s just a joke theory at this point, but it really looks like he’s actively blocking the part that swings out when he’s holding the keys, so I think he’s making it worse on himself.

Whoops.

It’s still not fair that his transformation is this cool. This time, instead of punching the bullet dead on, he backhand punches it. Because why not.

Punching Kong!

Enough power to annihilate a mountain.

…Huh. The keys that Vulcan and Valkyrie use don’t have the pre-announcements that Zero One’s keys do. Like, he has the whole ‘fly to the sky’ for Flying Falcon, and the ones for Rising Hopper and Biting Shark, but there’s no such announcement for the three AIMS keys. Interesting.

As Vulcan starts wailing on the Trilobites, Gou takes his advice to keep going forward to heart, and starts looking again. Good thing he looked right in front of him, because he finds an SD card with the Hiden Intelligence logo on it.

According to Anna, it’s the memory chip for an older model of HumaGear. She inserts it into one of her earpieces to start reading the data.

…Maybe you shouldn’t be doing that in the middle of a battle area? I’m just saying. Maybe, you know, wait until you guys are out of there?

Yeah, see? Aruto and Onycho crash in through a wall, and the Magia fires off a set of cables, overtaking Anna. Nobody is okay with this, least of all Anna.

Who is fighting back. She lasts longer than any of the other Trilobite transformations we’ve seen. The overhaul completes, and ‘she’ goes after Gou, grabbing him by the neck… and as Vulcan aims his ShotRiser in her direction, she stops, and her ear pieces start flashing between the hacked red and their native blue.

…wow…

“Now p-playing… f-footage from-”

She activates her ear pieces to play the security footage. And it is still Anna in there. She’s fading fast, but she’s still there. She is so intent on seeing this through… I hate to say this, but Anna would have made an excellent Magia, wouldn’t she?

––

The footage is absolutely heartbreaking.

Gou’s father, Sakurai Satoshi, is in his office, lit by red emergency lights. He’s recording a last message.

“All HumaGear in the factory have gone berserk! The factory is likely going to explode. All the employees should have evacuated, so…”

The monitors are overtaken with static, and the regular displays are hijacked to play a message. A shadowed figure with rectangular yellow eyes stands in front of a purple background, with the logo of metsubojinrai.net in black.

He’s declaring their war against humanity, their intent to destroy the town and annihilate all humans.

But Satoshi says he won’t let that happen. He refuses.

He pushes one of those big red buttons, the ones that should never need to be pressed, closing all gates. He’s sealing all the HumaGear inside… as well as himself. As the head of this factory, he will take responsibility for making sure they are destroyed.

As the emergency alert continues to sound, calling for evacuation, he takes off his microphone headpeice, and all but falls into a chair.

“Gou…”

The scene is covered in flames, before the footage cuts out.

––

As Anna’s hand falls from where she was projecting, she manages to say – without any of the usual broken stutter – that the database is being updated with regards to Daybreak Town. She slumps down, inactive.

Aruto is quiet as he says that Gou’s father was a hero.

Isamu is quiet, trembling with rage, as he says that this wouldn’t have happened if HumaGear didn’t exist. He prepares his finisher.

Why does he get such AWESOME FINISHERS?!

The default Punching Kong finisher? The ‘Punching Blast’?

It’s rocket fists. He literally shoots his gun – and by that, I mean the fists of his armor turn into rockets, going after Onycho, pushing him through three levels of ceiling and out into the sky, where they go right through him.

As the fire from the explosion channels down the GIANT HOLE IN THE CEILING, the fists return and reattach to his armor.

Yo.

Isamu seems… I don’t know if determined is quite the right word? But he’s almost calm as he tells Aruto that AIMS will be confiscating the HumaGear (Anna) and analyzing it’s (her) memory to uncover the truth behind Daybreak-

A spike lands in her back as he says this, and she glows purple, before… well, I hate to phrase it like this, but she basically pops. I wish that wasn’t the sound effect they used, but it’s a dissolving sound effect combined with a balloon bursting. She’s turned into motes of purple light, and is gone.

Aruto and Isamu – still transformed, mind you – run over to where she was, confused.

…The spike didn’t glow, but we didn’t see it after the light passed.

––

A figure in purple, with a yellow belt and rectangular eyes on his helmet walks away, and removes his progrise key from his belt, detransforming into Horobi.

Jin bounces behind him, calling him cold for doing that.

Horobi doesn’t change his neutral expression much as he says that it would cause too much trouble if anyone found out about the Arc. Or, maybe it’s supposed to be Ark? It’s hard to say. But he smirks at the end, before he and Jin walk away.

Well, Horobi walks. Jin is skipping.

––

The next day, we see that the news is reporting on how Hiden Intelligence released new information on Daybreak, showing that the incident wasn’t what was on the record, and that they had obtained footage of those final moments.

Gou’s classmates apologize to him, for being so mean, but he seems okay with it. (He probably wouldn’t have been so determined to find out what happened if they hadn’t been.) As the news report, given via those giant heli-drones, ends, they head off to school.

Aruto watches them from a pedestrian bridge, and Isamu walks up to him and Izu.

“So, you really meant it when you said you wouldn’t cover anything up.”

“And you wouldn’t have known what happened if you had destroyed Anna right away.” Aruto smiles gently, before the comedian sound effects start kicking in. Oh no.

The Awful Pun Of The Day as Aruto flips up his hood is something involving being a ‘hood guy’, or telling Izamu not to ‘sweater it.’

Apparently, the original pun is a combination of the phrase for being indebted to someone, but part of the phrase also contains the term ‘to wear’, as in clothes, so he’s saying this while putting on his hood.

Aruto, please.

Isamu trembles while he’s still facing Aruto, and walks away as Izu starts explaining the joke. Aruto’s desperate attempts to get Izu to stop doing that mean that he doesn’t hear as Isamu almost lets a laugh escape, even while desperately trying to regain his composure.

Isamu’s willpower fails during the closing screen, and we hear him laughing as the Flying Falcon and Punching Kong Progrize Keys show up on screen.

––

Oh, nooooo, the next episode looks like it’s about relegating entire tasks to HumaGear, and also about passion for one’s work.

You know, getting heated.

And Izu’s line in the trailer actively asks if humans have trouble regulating their temperature if they get too passionate.

In the episode where Zero One’s fire form debuts.

Oh boy.

––

So, that’s episode four! I guess I still wound up going pretty in-depth, huh?

Man, the aesthetic of this show. It’s really cool, and I love the music, too.

Zero One really isn’t shying away from the ethics of what’s going on here, is it? And it’s not dodging the terrifying backstory, or putting it off until later.

I hope they can keep this momentum going!

[hollenius]

re neurodivergent headcanons in Breaking Bad/Better Call Saul, I think the first time (a year or so ago) I read something where someone online suggested Chuck was somewhere on the autism spectrum (high functioning/Aspergers), I laughed it off as a ridiculous suggestion, because he didn’t “fit” many of the stereotypical traits seen in other fictional characters or in the popular conception of the topic…but in retrospect, I think that came more from my misunderstanding of the “spectrum” part of it than anything else. It’s definitely a plausible/possible diagnosis comorbid with the anxiety disorder(s) he canonically has.

·         We know Chuck’s a good actor (e.g. his ability to fool Jimmy in “Klick”) and is able to mimic and slip into different sorts of social behaviors (e.g. his ability to social climb from a working class or lower-middle-class family to the world of white shoe law firms), so he’s probably capable of using masking in most public settings. This is apparently a more common trait in autistic women, but men do it as well, if less frequently.

·         Studies asking about the long-term effects of masking seem to imply it takes a physical/emotional/mental toll on the person using it, which might explain why, by the time we see him in BCS, the stress of acting “normal” in meetings and the like, when compounded with the worsening of his anxiety problems, leaves him curled up under a space blanket for hours or even days afterward. Trying to compensate for multiple issues at once is probably even more taxing.

·         He seems prone to getting overwhelmed by things and either shutting down or lashing out in reaction. The most extreme form of the former is when he goes catatonic for hours/days in response to being tazed or put in the CAT scan machine; the most extreme form of the latter is probably him completely losing it and shouting/crying/having to be physically restrained by the hospital staff because he’s so upset about being surrounded by lights/hooked up to an EKG/being recommended for a CAT scan.

·         Contrary to stereotypes, Chuck is decent at reading people (or at least he’s extremely good at reading his brother and knowing how he behaves) and he interacts well with people within a work context, but he doesn’t seem to have any friends outside of it, or much in the way of a social life–the other lawyers hold him in awe as a sort of glorified animate law encyclopedia, rather than someone they would want to hang out with or chat with informally. (Though Chuck doesn’t come across as the sort who would be interested in chit chat with coworkers anyway...) Being totally housebound and cut off from the outside world is upsetting to Chuck primarily because it interferes with his work as a lawyer–we never get the sense that he’s upset about it having any effect on his interpersonal relationships, because he doesn’t seem to have any. This is probably why losing Rebecca hit him so hard. He’s got almost nobody else, besides Jimmy and Howard, and he’s really not emotionally open and unguarded with anyone.

·         He’s got problems dealing with his emotions in general. Even when he’s trying to do his little pain/emotion/medication journal as part of his psychiatric treatment towards the end of season 3, he seems to struggle with articulating his emotional state–he’s just got “average” written down for most of the incidents he’s logged, but he’s not able to write down what his emotion is after he’s unable to sleep after insulting/lying to Jimmy to drive him away for the final time, and he seems to abandon writing in the journal after that & rapidly deteriorates psychologically. From what we see of him in the show, he seems to alternate between being extremely repressed and completely exploding and freaking out.

·         Some people have no interest in having or wanting friends, but I don’t think Chuck’s one of them. He seems pretty lonely. He remarks to Jimmy at one point in season 1 that he doesn’t really mind him hanging around to work on the Sandpiper case in his house because he’s glad for the company, which makes his systematic driving away of Jimmy and the few other people in his life all the sadder. The whole root of Chuck’s jealousy of Jimmy in the first place is that people like Jimmy, and they don’t like him. He makes attempts at being friendly, but struggles to do it on anything deeper than a surface level. (Of course, a lot of Jimmy’s friendliness and charm tends to be pretty shallow too, but I don’t know that Chuck really appreciates that or can tell the difference–all he sees are the results.)

·         He’s tone-deaf with jokes–he famously botches the attempt at a lawyer joke to his wife in the opening flashback in “Rebecca”, but he also makes an awkward attempt at humor when talking to Kim in a present-day scene later in that same episode (“the early bird gets the worm, which is good if you like worms”), which leads to some uncomfortable forced laughter from her. Some people are just serious by nature, but they probably wouldn’t bother trying to make jokes in the first place if that were the case. The fact that Chuck keeps trying to make jokes and failing suggests that there might be some impairment in that area. He sees Jimmy do it, and he sees it work for him, but can’t really manage it himself. (He seems to do ok with deadpan sarcasm though–that comment about young people loving local print journalism is probably my favorite Chuck quote.)

·         He’s very verbal and articulate, but his speech patterns can be a bit odd. He can be indirect and overly formal, which may or may not be an overcompensation for the more stereotypical autistic behavior of being too direct in speech as to be insensitive. He usually winds up still coming off as elitist and assholish anyway, though he may not be intending this/aware of this. When he’s nervous or upset, he tends to devolve into talking at people rather than to them, such as when he starts rambling on about probable cause and assorted legal precedents to the police officers who show up at his house in “Alpine Shepherd Boy”, without noticing that they aren’t even standing at the door anymore. He’s got a lot of information rattling around in his head, which he throws out as a defense, but not always in a way that is helpful; I don’t think talking about Latin translations of the Hippocratic Oath to the doctors sedating him without his consent before sending him in for a CAT scan is doing him any good (NB: the actual Hippocratic Oath is in Greek anyway, and the phrase Primum non nocere dates from a later period, so either Chuck has no idea what he’s talking about, he’s conflating two related things, or he’s freaking out enough that he doesn’t really care at this point).

·         He seems to ignore other people when they’re talking to him altogether if something sets him off or distracts him–when Howard tells him about Kim quitting HHM and teaming up with Jimmy, Chuck immediately tunes him out, to the point where Howard has to ask him if he’s still listening. Chuck says he is, but then walks off in the middle of Howard talking because he’s still distracted by what he said before, sending a confused/concerned Howard following after him. This is at its most extreme when he goes into his rant in “Chicanery” and is totally oblivious to both Galley pleading with him to stop and everybody else in the room staring at him in growing horror/disbelief until he’s far past the point of no return.

·         I’m actually sort of curious about Chuck’s abilities in court prior to the visible deterioration of his mental health, because although he clearly knows a lot about the law, his personality is a bit off-putting. I don’t know if he just sort of brute-forced his way through things because of his knowledge of obscure case law, because based on what I know from the lawyers I’m friends with, there are all sorts of subjective factors that can come into play in a court setting. The sort of things that would drive someone like Chuck nuts, like jurors who deliberately choose to ignore evidence because they’ve decided in advance that they don’t want to convict someone of a crime. (To be fair, this would also drive me completely insane, because I have a really hard time at my own job dealing with people who think the rules shouldn’t apply to them for various reasons.)

·         Chuck has an EXTREMELY black and white view of the world, and a sort of obsession with the authority of law and the importance of following the rules. He’s got really strong perfectionist tendencies within himself. I think a lot of why he gravitates toward the law is that he seems to find all the rules and procedures comforting, in a way--there’s a uniformity to the way the legal world works, and a framework in which everything proceeds--constraints which are equally binding on all participants.

·         Maybe he just knows a ton about the law because he’s a lawyer, but it might also fall into the case of it being a special interest, since his knowledge of obscure case law seems to be regarded as extensive and superlative even by other lawyers. (He reads FEC and ISO reports for fun!)

·         There’s something slightly elliptical about his thinking, and he doesn’t seem to realize that other people aren’t following his thought patterns. (He repeats his “One after Magna Carta!” justification for knowing the Mesa Verde address to Kim and Jimmy  in season 2 as well as to the officials from the Bar in season 3, which seems to suggest that he thinks it is a very obvious and logical connection that other people should grasp, though I’m not sure that it actually is outside of his head.)

·         I’m not entirely sure where the line between nervous tics and stimming is drawn, but he’s got a lot of little fidgety behaviors that come out especially when he’s stressed, especially scratching or shaking or wringing his hands. (The script to “Chicanery” indicates that he’s nearly drawing blood from digging into his hands while on his big rant, but it’s not visible onscreen because we’ve got that wonderful/agonizing slow zoom onto his face instead.) It's not clear if it predates the EHS or not. Sometimes there’s a clear tie in his behavior to perceived pain from electricity, but sometimes there’s not--sometimes it seems to result from him trying to distract himself from the electricity instead, like when he’s trying to stand outside the house for two minutes in “Bingo”. Sometimes he does it while he’s standing around in his house, thinking about something else, like while rehearsing arguments against Jimmy before he heads in to court in “Chicanery”.

·         There’s a pretty strong preference for routine/predictability & distress when it’s altered. (Most people probably would not get so suspicious if a single newspaper wasn’t delivered one day, for example. If it was repeated or frequent or a pattern, yes, but not for a single paper.) His control issues are brought up pretty frequently in fandom discussions; maybe he’s a jerk, maybe he’s just not able to function well in unpredictable situations, maybe it’s a little of both (e.g. Chuck being really bothered by Ernie bringing him the wrong kind of apples, then saying that it didn’t really bother him that much...but then telling Ernie to write it down so that he would get the right apple the next time, indicating that he actually WAS bothered by it)

·         It’s possible his perceived sensitivity to electricity grew out of an existing natural sensitivity or aversion to extremes in light or sound or anything else, but this is pure conjecture because we get so few flashback scenes. (Speaking only from personal experience, I don’t think I’m hurt by electricity, but I can hear lights when they’re turned on, and get uncomfortable/anxious under certain types of light, like fluorescents in big box stores when out shopping, so maybe someone who’s more sensitive to sensory things in general might be more prone to developing a sort of learned distress out of that.)

All of this is very inconclusive! But it’s totally plausible as a reading of the character.

[stardomwishes]

all the things he said

requested by: @all-hail-the-mad-queen

summary: james angst (the best angst is surprise angst)(spoilers to newest episode)

a/n: when i saw this i got excited because i love doing angst requests. i hope you like it!!

* when you met james you’d been at your lowest

* all the burdens you carried on your shoulders made it hard to go on anymore

* your hands were covered in so much blood from all the people you had killed to survive this long

* and for what? you did not even really want to live anymore as all this guilt enshrouded you

* you were exhausted of fighting

* but then you met james

* he had saved you from a surrounding horde that you had subconsciously thrown yourself into

* honestly? you hadn’t even known he hadn’t been a walker until he covered your mouth and whispered to you to follow him

* you had actually been hoping in the back of your mind that he’d actually been a walker and that you would get unlucky and get bitten instead

* but regardless, without thinking, you followed james as he lead you to safety.

* there wasn’t many words exchanged between the both of you at first when he allowed you to stay at his camp for the night— he was awkward around people, and you didn’t feel like talking

* but eventually he questioned you on how you’d gotten yourself in your previous predicament

* you confessed that you had not wanted to fight anymore

* that you were exhausted of all the bloodshed and the endless tragedy of this world

* and you had been looking for an escape

* james sees a version of himself when he first became aware of who he had become— you were lost

* scared

* you didn’t want to be a monster

* you wanted peace

* he wanted to help you so he shares his beliefs to you

* at first you had been a little skeptical

* was pacifism like that even possible?

* was there really more to walkers?

* it really made you think

* but as you had began to travel with him and see it all it practice?

* you soon began to believe in his ideologies

* they have you hope

* no

* james was what gave you hope

* so then fast forward a year or more and james decides to help clementine rescue her friends from the clutches of lily and her company

* you were still skeptical and conflicted

* the whole rescue mission seemed too..

* dangerous

* you didn’t want any of your walkers to get hurt (there was still people inside of them!) and you didn’t want to fight with other survivors

* you did not have good feeling brewing within your stomach, but james promised you everything would be ok

* the two of you were doing a good thing by helping them

* even it meant the horrible sacrifice of some of the walkers you had been protecting within the barn

* he also mentioned that the two of you would not have to participate in their fighting— you only had to help clementine guide the horde

* so you believed in him like you always did

* ..but maybe you should have challenged his words

* the two of were separated during the mission

* when the boat had exploded you fled to the entrance of a nearby cave

* you and james had promised each other to meet there after all of this chaos ended

* you hoped he was safe

* you didn’t know what you’d do without him

* he had become your reason to want to survive

* james has saved you from yourself

* you loved him

* you loved him much

* you wanted to tell him that after all of this was finished

* someone’s voice brought you out of your thoughts

* it was clementine

* who had aj and tenn following behind her

* and a LOT of walkers trailing the three of them

* the first thing that left your mouth was, ‘have you seen james?’

* she had expected such a question

* there was a distant look in her brown eyes for a moment and a frown tugged on her lips

* ‘we can talk about this later— first we need to get out of here!’

* you didn’t like that answer but merely nodded your head in agreement

* you all were quickly becoming surrounded by the undead

* clementine suggested finding refuge within the cave while tenn expressed his uncertainty in the idea

* ‘we don’t know where it leads’

* ‘well we do know there are walkers in the other direction’

* ‘but—‘

* ‘move it, dummy!’

* aj ran past all of you and squeezed through the small entrance of the cave

* the rest of you followed behind him

* the cave was dark

* you could hardly see anything within the darkness

* clementine asked you to guard the entrance as she tried to figure something out and you complied

* despite your initial hesitance to trust clementine, you knew she was smart

* if anyone could find an answer to their problems it was clementine

* so you silently kept watch at the entrance of the cave

* but your thoughts wandered to james again

* where was he? was he safe? was he worrying about you too?

* you anxiously bit at your nails

* you just needed to see him again..

* ‘we just need to go across one by one, and then we’ll move the rocks out of the way and then i’ll take—‘

* you turned to see tenn being grabbed by a walker.

* the youngest of the group was the one quickest to react, throwing a rock at the walker and then rushing forward to pull tenn from the grasp of the undead

* the two children tumbled to the ground as the walker let go of tenn

* and that’s when you saw him

* james

* your eyes widened

* your mouth fell open

* there he was..

* but..

* he was turned

* something within you broke in that moment, but you didn’t care

* you stepped forward, towards him

* he was still inside there and you knew it

* that’s what you believed

* a big smile spread across your face

* you heard the others calling your name in concern as you opened out your arms to james

* ‘it’s ok! he’s still inside! he would never hurt me!”

* you explained through your tears of joy and grief

* ‘i missed you so much’

* ‘i was so scared you wouldn’t come back to me’

* ‘james’ stumbled into your arms but instead of returning your embrace he sank his teeth into your neck

* you let out a gurgled scream of pain but held onto james tightly as he began to devour you

* the others had fled during your ‘distraction’

* they knew you were a lost cause

* you chose your fate

* ‘i love you so much’

* you whispered those words to ‘james’ as tears ran down your bloodied cheeks

* you were so happy you finally got to tell him that as your world faded into darkness

[bucky-at-bedtime]

Don’t Cross the Bar

A bartender!Bucky au (inspired by an episode of New Girl)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader,  reader x OMC (briefly)

Summary: Bucky has one rule, until one day, someone forces him to change it.

Warnings: Kissing?? 

Words: 2462

A/n: This is kind of long and I’m not super proud of it but it was an interesting dynamic I wanted to explore - hope some of you enjoy! It is midnight in Australia right now and I have been writing all night, so I’m going to bed. 

She was biting her lip. Goddamn she was biting her lip and it’s so hot. Her fingers circled the edge of the glass. And she pulled her phone out of her pocket, rolling her eyes at something on the screen.

“Buck”

She bought the brown liquor up to her lips, tipping the glass back and allowing the whiskey to flow across her lips before disappearing across her tongue. He never knew how much he wanted to be whiskey until that moment.

“Bucky”

When the glass hit the table her tongue poked it from her mouth, gently wetting her lips to taste the remains of the liquor on them. A hand ran through her hair and he imagined it was his-

“James Buchanan Barnes”

His thoughts were abruptly interrupted as a large hand waved in front of his face, quickly bringing his attention back to his friend sitting across the bar.

“What, Steve? What could you possibly want? I’m already giving you free drinks” he snapped at the blonde, irritated that he had been pulled from his daydreaming and slightly embarrassed that he had been caught.

“Oh, you mean the beer I finished 5 minutes ago while you were ogling the pretty girl in the booth?” Steve teased, leaking across the bar to grab another bottle of beer.

“I was not– ok, you know wh–“ Bucky stumbles over his words for a minute before glancing over at you again “shut up, Stevie”

“Go talk to her”

“Absolutely not”

“C’mon, Buck! You’ve been staring at her every Thursday and Friday night for the past 3 weeks!” Steve gestured towards the booth you were sitting in, attempting to convince Bucky to gain some confidence.

“You know my one rule, Steve” he buried himself by wiping down the bar in front of him. “Don’t cross th–“

“Don’t cross the bar, I know, I know” Steve interrupted taking another sip of his beer “but this is ridiculous. Rules were made to be broken”

“Shut up Steve. Bad things happen when I cross this bar.”

Bucky’s eyes drifted back over to you, only to find you already looking at him. He cleared his throat and quickly looked away, briefly glancing back up to see you smiling behind your glass.

He stared at the 3 feet of wooden bar in front of him. The 3 feet separating him from you.

He was seriously considering breaking his rule.

A couple of hours passed and you were still sitting in the same booth.

Originally, you were waiting for your boyfriend. Now, it had been 3 hours and you were just getting drunk.

“Hey, (y/n), I’m sorry I’m late”

You turned your head and saw Matt walking towards your booth. The man looked dodgy - his shaved head decorated with tribal tattoos and his leather jacket worn and ripped. Bucky looked up as your boyfriend made his way towards you and found himself rolling his eyes. He wouldn’t keep you waiting.

“Are you fucking kidding me, Matt?” You threw your hands up in the air. “We were supposed to meet three hours ago! I’m so sick of this”

“Oh come on! I’m a little late it’s not a big deal.” Bucky scoffed internally at his words and watched as you stood from the booth, your eyes flashing with anger.

“A little late?” You were a bit tipsy and suddenly it didn’t matter to you if the whole bar overheard your argument “did you not hear me? I’ve been waiting for her for thre–“

You abruptly stopped your rant when he turned his head and you got a glimpse of his neck underneath the collar of his leather jacket.

“Is that– is that a hickey?” Your hand reached for his neck but he quickly grabbed your wrist.

“It’s nothing, (y/n)”

“I’ve been sitting here for three hours and you were fucking somebody else?!” You were hysterical now and you bought your other hand up to slap him but he grabbed your wrist roughly, now holding both of them hostage and Bucky almost jumped the bar to get his hands off you.

“Look, I’m gonna go” he let go of your wrists and begun to walk out of the bar “call me when you’ve calmed down,” he hissed.

You slumped down into your seat, suddenly extremely uncomfortable with all the attention you had brought on yourself. Your head fell into your hands and you gripped your hair tightly. You suddenly felt far too sober for this. Bucky watched as you threw your head back and gulped down the rest of your drink. His eyes shifted to where the bar opened. “Fuck it” he whispered the words to himself as he stared at the bar in front of him. One rule. Don’t cross the bar. He ran his hand down his face, took a step, and suddenly his rule was broken. He sighed, looking back at the bar and hoping nothing bad happens. “Here we go” he murmured to himself before walking over to where you were sitting and cleared his throat. “Uh, hey can I get you a whiskey?”

Your head left your hands and you quickly found him standing beside you “What?” you asked, confused by his sudden appearance.

“Uh, I say that because you like whiskey” he paused, smiling at you nervously “you’re a whiskey girl, like me”

You chuckled lightly at his words “You’re a whiskey girl?” you bit your lip to hold back a chuckle, suddenly forgetting you just had an argument with your boyfriend.

He closed his eyes, regretting his phrasing. “I’m Bucky” he sighed. He was starting over.

“I’m (y/n)” You rubbed underneath your eyes, both from tiredness and checking for tears. When you looked back up at him he was standing silently, obviously struggling with what to say next. “Well, Well, what are you standing there for? Go grab a bottle and get me drunk, idiot.”

“Well, I-I couldn’t drink with you– I work here.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, having seen him drinking with his friends every time you were here.

“Just kidding, I get drunk, like, all the time.” He laughed and quickly strolled back towards the bar, leaning over and grabbing a full bottle of whiskey. You watched him, slightly confused by his approach but happy to have some company.

“Thanks, Bucky”

“I respect the amount you drink-” Bucky chuckled as you took another swig from the bottle. You were both considerably tipsy by now. “Oh, - FYI these drinks -” he gestured to the half-empty bottle between you “aren’t free.” He was smiling so you knew this was a joke. The bar was empty now, supposed to be closed but Bucky didn’t want to leave yet.

“Wow, well, joke’s on you ‘cause Matt left with all my money.” You pouted your lips and shrugged at him, both giggling from the alcohol.

“Oh really?” he laughed “Then how’re you gonna pay for these drinks, doll?” you had both become touchy over the last hour or so, he would rest his arm over your shoulders or rub your arm gently as he spoke. You didn’t mind.

You watched as he took a sip of the whiskey and decided to have some fun with your answer. “Oh… probably with sex?”

He choked on his drink and some of it escaped his mouth, exploding onto his shirt as you laughed at his shock. He was visibly affected by your words and it made you want to say more.

“I mean, I was gonna let you have sex with Matt” you continued to joke and he groaned lightheartedly.

“That was a trick” he mumbled and you took another swig of your drink, gently laughing at him. “Can I just say, you two…” his sentence trailed off and you looked at him curiously. “Actually don’t worry - not my place to say”

“What? What were you gonna say?” you placed your hand on his arm, urging him to continue.

“I– I just don’t think you should be with a guy like that,” he mumbled, obviously uncomfortable with this conversation.

“Yeah? Why would you think that?”

“He’s an asshole” he practically yelled, the alcohol getting to him. “Sorry, I don’t feel like it’s my place to say, doll”

“Well, you just said it–”

“I don’t know, doll–”

“Do you think I should break up with him, Buck? Do you–”

“Look, it’s not my–”

“You think I should dump hi–” You weren’t annoyed at him, but you continued to interrupt his bumbling, wanting to get the truth out of this dark-haired stranger.

“Dump his ass!” Finally, Bucky interrupted you. The alcohol was clouding his better judgment and he had always gotten bad vibes off that Matt guy. You were both silent for a moment and he closed his eyes, regretting his words. He did not want to ruin your relationship.

“I’m sorry, (y/n), I just… You seem like such a great and vibrant person. He seems like such a dick. You deserve better.”

You suddenly realized how close you had gotten, your face only inches away from his and you caught his eyes dropping down to your lips.

You grabbed onto Bucky’s collar, pulling him towards you and pressing your lips to his. You both tasted of whiskey and the kiss was sloppy and passionate. You were sober enough to realize what you were doing and tipsy enough to not care as his tongue brushed across your bottom lip and he deepened the kiss. Your hands went to his hair and he gripped your waist tightly, groaning as you tighten your grip on his roots, pulling gently at his hair.

You pulled at the bottom of his shirt, lifting it off of him before continuing the kiss. You were both lost in it, unaware of how lonely you felt without his touch and you never wanted to stop kissing each other.

Suddenly he remembered he had to breathe and pulled his lips from yours. Then he remembered you had a boyfriend and pulled away completely.

It wasn’t long after that when you both retreated home.

He closed up the bar, thinking about your lips on the edge of the glass and your hand on his arm. He thought about your smile behind the cheap glass and your hand running through your hair. He thought about your chapped lips on his and pressed his hand to his mouth.

You walked home, thinking about how this complete stranger had just come and changed your entire night. He made you laugh. You thought about his hair and his hands and his eyes. You thought about his advice. But most of all, you thought about his lips on yours. His hands on your waist and how it was better than any kiss you had ever shared with Matt.

That night, Bucky dreamt of you. That night, you broke it off with Matt.

It was the next day when Bucky was standing behind the bar, chatting with Steve and Sam carelessly. Matt burst through the bar door, you following in his footsteps, attempting to grab his arm and hold him back but he looked determined. He looked angry.

Bucky looked up when Matt reached the bar, “Are you Bucky?” he asked, anger laced in his voice as he practically spat straight into Bucky’s face. You caught Bucky’s eyes, a worried look on your face as you mentally attempted to apologize to him.

Bucky should not have crossed the bar.

“Um… no?” The denial came out as a question, that was a mistake. The man gripped onto Bucky’s collar and Steve attempted to pull him back, but Bucky dismissed him with a shake of his head. Steve struggled, he did not want to sit back and allow this to happen so he quickly dialed the cops.

He really should not have crossed the bar.

Matt reeled back and threw his fist at Bucky’s face, his knuckles hitting his cheekbone. Bucky groaned in response but didn’t fight back. He probably deserved this for kissing another guy’s girl.

Suddenly, Matt’s grip loosened and when Bucky opened his eyes, he saw you standing there, holding a ceramic bowl of what used to be pistachios above your head. You had knocked Matt out.

Bucky turned to look at Steve whose eyes were wide. “I should not have crossed the bar,” he groaned.

It was about an hour later, after Matt was removed from the bar and taken into custody that you re-entered the bar. Your hands were in your pockets and you avoided eye contact with bucky, evidently embarrassed by your ex’s outburst.

Bucky, unaware of your break-up, did not want to get more involved and sighed when you approached the bar, attempting to treat you like a normal customer. “What can I get for you?”

“I don’t want a drink, Buck” you murmured, hearing the coldness in his voice you were determined to gain his trust again. “I came to hang out”

He sighed again, looking up at you, his blue eyes piercing as he rubbed the back of his neck. “I have this rule” he begun to explain “Don’t cross the bar.” He shook his head slightly in regret. “And I broke that rule and–” he cut himself off, running a hand through his hair again, exhaling loudly.

“Look, these 18 inches of oak are the only thing that separates me from guys like Matt!” he gestured vaguely to the place where the incident had occurred, shaking his head gently. “I should not have crossed the bar last night.”

You stared at him for a moment, deciding what to say. You did not want to lose whatever it was you and Bucky had shared last night.

“I don’t have any rules”

His eyebrows twitched in confusion as you stood up from the barstool, pushing a couple of glasses and napkins to the side as you climbed up onto the bar.

“Don’t do th-” you pressed your hands to the bar, swinging one leg over “Don’t, no–” you pulled the other leg over “No customers–” he protested weakly but gave up once you were sitting in front of him, your legs on either side of his body. “Behind the bar” he murmured, but he was silenced when you grabbed the collar of his black shirt, pulling him up to your lips and pressing them harshly against his.

He immediately kissed you back, wrapping a hand around the back of your neck whilst the other rested on your thigh. A couple of customers clapped and whistled as your hands tangled into his dark hair, but he didn’t stop, pressing his lips to yours, as his tongue entered your mouth and you moaned into his.

“Okay, okay, you two need to stop, you’re ruining this place for everyone” Steve nudged Bucky’s arm and the two of you finally disconnected. “I told you rules are made to be broken” Steve mumbled before continuing his chat with Sam.

You leaned down so your lips were right next to Bucky’s ear, your breath rushed across his neck as you spoke “When your shift’s over, you should come to my place” You chuckled lightly into his ear making him shiver before continuing “unless, of course, you can’t cross the bar.”

[armyhealth9-blog]

[Transcript] – The Ultimate Guide To Freediving, Legal Blood Doping, Wim Hof Breathing, Increasing Your Breathhold Time, Underwater Ear Equalizing, Spearfishing & Much More!

Podcast from: https://bengreenfieldfitness.com/podcast/biohacking-podcasts/hold-breath-longer/

[0:00:00] Introduction

[0:01:18] Podcast Sponsors

[0:03:52] Meeting Ted Harty

[0:08:37] What happens to the body during free diving?

[0:12:04] Mammalian Dive Reflex

[0:18:54] The Connection Between the Spleen and Breath Holding/Free Diving

Get The Low Carb Athlete - 100% Free!Eliminate fatigue and unlock the secrets of low-carb success. 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[0:24:22] The Benefits of Free Diving

[0:29:58] Tips for Increasing Breath Hold Time

[0:33:39] Podcast Sponsors

[0:36:36] What an apnea table is and the difference between CO2 and O2 apnea?

[0:38:33] The Wonka Table

[0:44:32] Would you do a table while exercising?

[0:48:39] Breath Work In Between Dives

[0:53:08] Valsalva and Frenzel Breathing Technique

[0:58:19] Demonstration of The Frenzel Breathing Technique

[1:02:31] Ted’s and Wim Hof Breathwork

[1:06:47] The Bohr Effect

[1:12:42] Exercise and Regimen for Freedivers

[1:26:21] Courses Offered by Ted Harty

[1:29:13] Closing the Podcast

[1:30:23] End of Podcast

Ted:  And you talk to people that freedive and they get all starry-eyed and they’re just like, “Oh, it’s just amazing. You’d be down there.” When you’re not a freediver, you’re like, “How can being underwater and drowning and suffocating be relaxing?” Well, when you do it right, you don’t feel like you’re drowning. You’re completely relaxed. You’re weightless. It’s not like anything else I’ve certainly ever done, and you talk to people that do it and they all swear by it.

Ben:  I have a master’s degree in physiology, biomechanics, and human nutrition. I’ve spent the past two decades competing in some of the most masochistic events on the planet from SEALFit Kokoro, Spartan Agoge, and the world’s toughest mudder, the 13 Ironman triathlons, brutal bow hunts, adventure races, spearfishing, plant foraging, free diving, bodybuilding and beyond. I combine this intense time in the trenches with a blend of ancestral wisdom and modern science, search the globe for the world’s top experts in performance, fat loss, recovery, gut hormones, brain, beauty, and brawn to deliver you this podcast. Everything you need to know to live an adventurous, joyful, and fulfilling life. My name is Ben Greenfield. Enjoy the ride.

Well, hello. I had a blast on today’s episode with my buddy, Ted Harty, where we talk about freediving and breath-holding and spearfishing and a whole lot more. Even if you absolutely detest water, there are some very interesting takeaways in this particular show.

Now, a couple of quick things. This podcast is brought to you by Kion, which is my playground for all things health and wellness. What I’ve done is created this company to scratch my own itch whenever I find a cool new ingredient or some brand new molecule that can make your life better, whether it’s recovery or performance or digestion or fat loss or muscle gain or blood sugar control, you name it. I actually create these formulations. They’re the shotgun formulations of supplements, functional foods, bars, coffees. Everything is over there. It’s all research backed. It’s all real-world tested and designed to empower you to live a very fulfilling life, pain-free, operating with a brain and body that works the way it’s supposed to. So, you get 10% off of anything at Kion. Very simple. You go to getkion.com. That’s getK-I-O-N.com and the discount code that you can use over at Kion is BGF10. So, you go to getkion.com. BGF10 saves you 10% site-wide. How do you like that?

This podcast is also brought to you by Joovv. Joovv is the giant red light panel that I use in my office. I pull down my pants. I walk in front of that thing. It increases my skin health, my collagen and elastin production, warms my joints up, reduces pain, reduces inflammation, causes this big nitric oxide flush from my whole body for if I’m going to go work out or maybe in the evening go make a little love. It also, speaking of making love, increases testosterone production, guys, if your balls get exposed to this thing.

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Hey, folks. About two years ago, I wrote an article called, “How Breath-Holding, Blood-Doping, Shark-Chasing, Free-Diving & Ketosis Can Activate Your Body’s Most Primal Reflex.” I wrote that after I began to get involved with freediving and spearfishing, which I did when I discovered this book, this again was a couple of years ago, by an author named James Nestor. The name of the book was “Deep: Freediving, Renegade, Science, and What The Oceans Tell Us about Ourselves.” It was a great book and it got me so interested in this concept of freediving and spearfishing that I decided to hunt down one of the best people in the U.S. to actually teach me how to do this. So, I hired this guy named Ted Harty from Immersion Freediving in Fort Lauderdale, Florida to certify me in freediving so that I could then learn how to spearfish and also how to increase my breath-hold, get better at equalizing underwater, be able to dive more than 15 feet, which I could never do in my life without getting ear pain and I couldn’t figure out how to equalize the depth.

So, I hooked up with this guy named Ted Harty. He’s 6 feet tall. He’s 230 pounds. He’s like a big guy. He looks like a boxer not like a guy you’d expect to be diving an incredibly efficient oxygen capacity to depths deeper than most of us have ever gone. But he has cracked the code on this stuff. He opened up my eyes to a whole new world of freediving. I spent 96 hours of my life down in Florida getting trained by him in the classroom, in the pool, and eventually, in the ocean. Ted, what’s most interesting about him is, A, he holds the record for hypoxic underwater swimming in the pool. He can do seven full-lengths in the pool without a single breath, and he has anemia, which means his blood can’t deliver oxygen as efficiently to his muscles and brain as most of the world’s population. This means he has a relatively low blood hematocrit level, yet he still figured out how to crack the code on freediving with a condition that would leave most folks huffing and puffing for air after they climb a flight of stairs.

He was selected as the team captain for the U.S. freediving team at the Freediving World Championships. He’s also a scuba instructor. His wealth of knowledge is absolutely staggering when it comes to everything to do with breath-holding and freediving. Now, I interviewed him on the podcast a couple of years ago and we delved into everything from using static apnea tables to how cold and cold water could actually inhibit your ability to be able to hold your breath. We talked about his whole back story.

And today, we’re going to be diving into a lot more in terms of like the biology and the physiology of freediving, how to take bigger breaths, how to equalize properly. But if you want to hear Ted’s whole back story, because we’re going to spend more time on the freediving component than the back story component, then just go listen to my first podcast with Ted. What I’m going to do is I’m going to link to that first podcast with Ted and I’m also going to link to everything that we talk about on today’s show if you just go to bengreenfieldfitness.com/freedivingpodcast. That’s benreenfieldfitness.com/freedivingpodcast.

Ted, welcome to the show, man.

Ted:  I’m excited to be on the show and excited to chat with you, guys.

Ben:  Yeah, for sure. I mean, I feel like I talked to you on a frequent basis because it seems like every time I’ve got the tiniest question about spearfishing gear or freediving or anything else, you’re just an email away. So, we tend to chat back and forth quite a bit, but I figured it was high time I actually got you back on the show because I’m going to be spearfishing next month down in Kona. And I know a lot of people are interested in this emerging knowledge of how good some of this stuff is for you. By the way, if you’re listening in and you just have no clue why the hell you’d want to get in the water and dive more than 15 feet and maybe grab a speargun and go hunt after tasty fish, we’re going to fill you in on the show.

Actually, Ted, I think that’d be a perfect jumping off point here or a perfect topic to dive into, pun intended, as we get going. What is it that happens to the body during freediving? Why is it that this is something that Olympic athletes are doing and people are now using to enhance their vagus nerve function? What’s the deal with the biological benefits of this?

Ted:  Well, freediving is–I don’t need to tell you. It’s exploding right now. It’s getting super, super popular, so more and more people are getting into freediving. We see almost all of the scuba agencies now are jumping on the freediving bandwagon because–I mean, freediving is awesome. So, it does a lot of interesting things, like yoga is super popular. And if you go to almost any yoga class, one of the first things they’re going to do is they’re going to alter how you breathe. And guess what, we as freedivers do. We alter how we breathe. In fact, very similar to the breathing that we might do as a freediver is what you might do in yoga. So, one of the first things my students notice is when I start teaching them the breathing we use for free diving, they go to the breathing pattern for three minutes and everyone’s like, “Wow, I feel great. I feel totally relaxed,” because it works.

So, freediving is a way to access all of that stuff in the water, in the ocean, you get a chance to see the marine life, and unlike scuba, you get to be actually a part of it because you’re not this loud, mechanical thing that’s swimming through the water. You’re actually freediving, holding your breath, and it’s a lot of fun. It is something you’ve never tried. Now, it’s easier than never to get involved in the sport.

Ben:  Yeah, that’s actually one of the things I like the most is I’ll fish from a boat or I’ll fish from the shore with a fly-fishing rod or a reel and you’re kind of blind fishing. You’re throwing your hook in there. You may or may not get a legal fish or a non-catch and release fish that you could actually go home and cook up. And then you put on your wet suit and you put on your mask and you dive into the water with an actual speargun, and all of a sudden, you’re down there in the coral, you have this amazing feeling of relaxation, all the worries of the world just slip away and you’re exercising, you’re cold, you’re holding your breath.

So, you’re tapping into all the benefits that we’re going to talk about when it comes to the mammalian dive reflex, which I’m going to ask you about and the spleen compression that happens when you dive deep. But even if you don’t get a fish, you feel amazing at the end of a couple of hours of spearfishing just because you’re looking at beautiful coral and seeing amazing nature and scenery and swimming with the fish that swim up to you because you’re not in your foreign-looking scuba diving gear.

And then when you do see a fish, let’s say you see a big group or that you want to go after, it’s not like you’re on the edge of the shore like blindly throwing the hook in hoping that that fish is the one that bites. You just go and hunt that fish, which is amazing. You hunt it, you get it, you bring it to the surface or you put it on your stringer and then go home and have a fish cooked.

Yeah. For me, it’s just way, way better than regular fishing. But let’s get into the physiology here. Can you talk to me specifically–let’s start off with the mammalian dive reflex? What is that and why would we want to activate that?

Ted:  The mammalian dive reflex is it’s genetically coded in every human being on the planet. Dolphins, seals and whales are mammals. We, as human beings, are mammals. So, dolphins, seals and whales are full-time residents of the water. We are part-time residents of the water. So, dolphins, seals and whales, one of the reasons they can dive so incredibly deep and do all these things that they can do is because they have something called the mammalian dive reflex, and it’s absolutely something that we have, too. One of the things that I or other instructors will do in a freediving class is the reason that we can get anyone to hold their breath for two to three minutes is I know how to reach into the body, press the button, turn the knobs, adjust the dials to your actual freediving physiology and make that dive reflex come out.

Now, everyone has the dive reflex but it’s considered like–it’s graded, right? My dive reflex is much stronger than yours because I dive all the time, yet you compare me to a world record freediver, their dive reflex is going to be much stronger than mine. Now, the reflex itself is composed of several components. And so, I’ll go through those. One of them is bradycardia, which is just a fancy name for rapid onset of the lowering of the heart rate. You’ll see the heart rate drop upwards of 50% as soon as the body has a contraction. The contraction is happening. You’re holding your breath for a certain amount of time, your body is going to say, “Hey, maybe you should take a breath,” and it’s going to trigger contractions.

Contractions feel like, if you’ve never had one, it’s like a hiccup. If you hold your breath long enough, you’ll have one. It’s actually the body trying to draw that–make you take a breath, but we as freedivers are going to say, “No, not quite yet.” Now, that contraction is going to be obviously trying to make you take a breath. So, one of the things that the body does is now that it realizes that you’re not going to breathe, it’s going to say, “Hey, let’s lower the demand of oxygen.” So, it actually drops that heart rate up to 50 beats to try to beat more oxygen, conserve the oxygen. That’s a very helpful part of the dive reflex.

There are several other components. One of the things that happen is the blood vessels in the fingers and the toes will constrict, and the idea is this trying to push all the blood to our core where we need it; heart, lung and brains. That’s also why we get the pee reflex. Freedivers and scuba divers are probably familiar with the fact that as soon as they get in the water, they feel like they have to pee. Now, it’s even stronger among freedivers.

Ben:  So, that’s what’s going on.

Ted:  Yeah.

Ben:  Yeah. I mean, it happens even when you’re just cold in general. What’s happening is your peripheral organs or your peripheral extremities are constricting, and when that happens, it actually–does it cause like a vasodilation of the vessels leading into the areas responsible for urination or how exactly is that working?

Ted:  Well, it’s pushing all of the fluid from the blood vessels that are shrinking are coming into the core. And then at that point, they’re going, “Hey, there’s too much fluid in here. We got to get rid of that.” And that’s going to trigger that urge to pee.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  And it’s definitely stronger with freedivers than the scuba divers. You still get it both ways but the breath-holding has access–does it as well. So, for me, if I do a deep dive, like let’s say I’m teaching a class and I’m doing 100 plus foot dive, almost every time I come up, I’ll have urge to go to the bathroom. It was just tiny but it’s like almost every time.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  That depth exacerbates it more.

Ben:  Me too. Me too. Now, I’ve talked a lot in the show before about the vagus nerve and the importance of vagal nerve tone to have a healthy nervous system response, healthy feedback to the heart, healthy balance of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system. A lot of people track heart rate variability. Now, high heart rate variability is a good sign you’re recovered, that your nervous system is ready to train or ready for stress. And in many people who have poor vagal nerve function, one of the main reasons their HRV is low is because of that poor vagal nerve function.

Now, from what I understand, when we activate them a million-dive reflex, we somehow trigger that vagus nerve to become more tone because that’s what’s produced now bradycardia, that lowering of the heart rate that you talked about. Now, when it comes to things like heart rate variability or the vagus nerve, have you looked into that or tracked that at all yourself?

Ted:  That’s really something that I don’t–I mean, I know all that you’re saying is true but it’s not something that I have a lot of area of expertise on. Certainly, freedivers, we talk about that. I know those things happen when we’re holding our breath, but it’s not something I’ve done a lot of research into.

Ben:  Yeah. It’d be fascinating to see a study of freedivers and heart rate variability because I’d guess theirs is profoundly higher than the general population. I mean, people who do like Wim Hof breathing, which I want to ask you about here in a bit.

Ted:  Yeah.

Ben:  Breath-holding get that, but I think once you add in that cold-water exposure, getting the face under which you don’t get in like a cryotherapy chamber, you’ve got to get into the water, you see that improvement in vagal nerve tone that I think is very impressive.

Ted:  It would be interesting to see if I could get some of my competitor freediver friends during our competition where they’re going to be going through this a lot, as more and more of them have the ability to track–it’s a lot easier to track that now than it used to be.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  That would be something interesting. I would reach out to those guys and see what happens.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  So, if I can do that, I will let you interpret the results [00:18:24] ______.

Ben:  Yeah, it would be very interesting. We just get them an Oura Ring, which is the ring that will–well, you know what? The Oura Ring tracks it during sleep. It wouldn’t track it during the actual dive. We could see what’s happening during a night of sleep afterwards. The other way to do it would be the WHOOP wristband would do it. That’s one that could track it in real time. They could put on this wristband during their dives and I’m pretty sure that’s water resistant to 100 meters or so. So, that’s about as deep as most of the folks are going to be.

Now, what about the spleen? There was a research study, it’s a relatively new research study but it looked at what happens when just dry land, not even in the water, you hold your breath. In this study, they did five maximal apneas, like five maximal breath-holds without being in the water. And what they noted in these folks was an improvement in terms of red blood cell production and blood flow in and out of the spleen. So, what’s the connection between the spleen and breath-holding and the spleen and diving?

Ted:  Yes. That is another part of that mammalian dive reflex. So, you’ve got bradycardia, you’ve got the blood shunting, and then the spleen contraction. I had first heard of that probably maybe 15 years ago. They had done some–they had a performance freediving, had done some studies and saw that. The first thing they did was they put Tanya Streeter in a hyperbaric chamber which simulates going to depth. They measured, I believe it was a 20% decrease in volume of the spleen, and they also measured increase in other hematocrit. So, the spleen is a reservoir for red blood cells, it’s like the hospital so when that thing compresses, it’s shooting more red blood cells in the system, increasing your oxygen carrying capacity.

So, then the researcher said, “Oh, it’s not because of breath-holding. It was just because of the pressure of being in the hyperbaric chamber that did it.” Then later, they did an experiment with Mandy Cruickshank where she literally just laid down on the table and held her breath. And just holding her breath on dry land compresses the spleen. So, the idea is this is another reflex that’s designed to increase our ability to hold our breath because, in essence, this is legal blood doping, is what it is. This is increasing that hematocrit levels so that now the body can be better, can transport and store more oxygen.

One of the things I’ve always laughed about is when I talk about this in the program, in the intermediate course, I get into the spleen and the contractions and all this sort of stuff, is I always envisioned, “One of these days, you’re going to turn on the Olympics and you’re going to see this sprinter and he’s going to have a little Immersion logo on his uniform and he’s going to be doing his warm-up just like everyone else except he’s going to be holding his breath.” Why? Because he’s trying to trigger that splenic contraction. He’s then going to win the gold medal. And then when they drug test him, they’re going to be, “Yeah, your hematocrit level is way too high,” and they’re going to test all his blood and there’s going to be nothing in it and then they’re going to be like, “We don’t know what happened.” Because it’s legal blood doping.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  Now, what we don’t know, and I would be interested to find out maybe listeners or you or whatever, is we know that in elite athletes, just the aspect of holding your breath is going to induce a splenic contraction. I can guarantee you if one of your listeners holds your breath; their spleen isn’t going to contract because the body is going to be going, “What in the heck are you doing? You need to breathe.” Whereas in an elite athlete, they’re doing this all the time, so one of the things that happen is the more that you freedive, your body starts to work for you. It starts to do all these things to help you do better.

One of the reasons I can do what I do is because my dive reflex is strong, whereas if I’ve got a brand-new student, their body is going, “Why aren’t you breathing anymore?” That’s what I mean by it’s a [00:22:31] ______. The more that you do it, the stronger that dive reflex becomes and it allows you to perform better as a freediver.

Ben:  Yeah, but before I bought that book by James Nestor called “Deep” that I was talking about earlier, what it got me interested in the first place was, I believe it was an article James wrote. It was like New York Times or Wall Street Journal or one of these accessible websites that you can read news articles on. He wrote about how Olympic athletes were actually getting into freediving as a way to enhance performance, particularly, because of the red blood cell production or the “blood doping” or the “legal blood doping” that you were just alluding to. And just so you, the listener, understand what’s going on here–there’s a long time. My background is in exercise physiology, and physiologists long believe that the spleen was like this redundant organ that shared the liver’s function of destroying old red blood cells in the liver, and it actually has this secondary function because huge volumes of blood circulate through it so it acts as like this reservoir of blood. And when you compress it, you get this big release of red blood cells.

I mean, there are other things that they could do that, like we know that getting into the sauna after a workout when you’re already hot, that doesn’t compress the spleen but it does increase your red blood cell production and your erythropoietin production. You could, and I do this sometimes, I’ll do breathe holds in the sauna to double up on that effect and get my spleen to jump into the game, too. But it still doesn’t really match what you get once you introduce the compression that occurs when you’re actually in the water and diving the depth.

Would you say there are any other benefits besides the spleen, the mammalian dive reflex, the vagus nerve, and just the freaking enjoyment that comes out of being in the water?

Ted:  I mean, it’s just overall wellbeing. You talk to people that freedive and they get all starry-eyed and they’re just like, “Oh, it’s just amazing. You’d be down there.” It’s just completely–when you’re not a freediver, you’re like, “How can being underwater and drowning and suffocating be relaxing?” Well, when you do it right, you don’t feel like you’re drowning. You’re completely relaxed, you’re weightless. It’s not like anything else I’ve certainly ever done and you talk to people that do it and they all swear by it.

Ben:  Yeah. I guess the only other thing to consider here would be for people who like to exercise to lose weight or to burn calories, when you combine the cold with the rigors of diving down and coming back up and diving down and coming back up, and then if you’re spearfishing, you combine that with the resistance training aspect of having to pull the big elastic band on that roller. Basically, what you’re doing is exercise in a giant liquid cryotherapy chamber. Have you ever seen any studies or anything looks like how many calories you would burn per hour doing something like freediving?

Ted:  I heard or saw some study but that was like seven, eight years ago and it seemed very anecdotal, but I think it was categorized in spearfishing but it was in this report that I saw, it was one of the highest ones. But I will tell you, it is exhausting. Of all the workouts that I do when I teach a class, I come home and I’m exhausted.

Ben:  Oh, man.

Ted:  Three hours diving up and down that line exactly because you not only have the work, I’m doing all the dives, your body is trying to generate your body heat to keep that up.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  It’s very challenging.

Ben:  Dude, I just found the study. It is 11–I’m sorry, 1,120 calories per hour that you burn freediving. I mean, to put that into context, playing basketball is 400 calories an hour, dancing is 200 calories an hour, the steeplechase is 700 calories, hunting which I love to do like bowhunting, that’s 175 calories per hour. Even boxing in the ring during a boxing match is 840 calories per hour. So, freediving is like basically–I’m looking at this list, the only thing close to it is people who are racing like running races and are doing their 5Ks and somewhere in the range 14 to 16 minutes like that matches freediving. That’s nuts.

Ted:  Yeah, freediving.

Ben:  That’s crazy.

Ted:  Yeah. I wonder if you know. So, I understand that, 1, being in the water, your body generates a lot of energy to try to keep the temperature normal. That does a lot of work. But I guess what I don’t understand, if you have any insight on, is how does the breath-holding part of it–I mean, it certainly seemed reasonable but it makes it more difficult, but I’m not sure how that translates into a calorie burn.

Ben:  I don’t think the breath-hold would translate into a calorie burn aside from a shift in metabolic efficiency like when oxygen is not present–and this is actually in relation to the ketogenic diet component of this which is very interesting. When oxygen is not present, you can tend to shift towards a little bit more glycolysis while you’re in the water. And when you do that, you can increase what’s called the glycogen sparing effect, meaning that once you’re done with the dive, your body actually becomes very efficient at sparing carbohydrates, particularly via what’s called beta-oxidation or burning of fats, and also the production of ketones to allow you–ketones are the primary source of fuel for the diaphragm, for the liver, for the heart, and for the brain.

One could argue that those are used just as much as the muscles during freediving. And so not only would you increase your fat burning capacity once you’re done with the diving, but also this would go to say–and there’s anecdotal evidence from guys like Dominic D’agostino who is able to double his breath-hold time from–he did it from two to four minutes. He didn’t do any training. All he did was shift himself into ketosis.

I don’t know if you remember, but when I went down to Immersion Freediving and took your course, I took those ketone supplements. I experiment for my breath-hold with and without ketone supplements, and I had like a 40 to 50 seconds increase in breath-hold time, not even like shifting to a high-fat diet or changing my diet dramatically but just by using ketones. And so not only are you enhancing your body’s own ability to use ketones but one could argue, and again I’ve seen long-term studies on this, that if you were to supplement with ketones or be on a ketogenic diet, you could actually increase your breath-hold via that method as well.

Ted:  Yeah. That’s interesting. I’m curious if any other elite divers are playing around with that.

Ben:  I’m sure we’ll get some divers listening in. So, if you do diving and listening and you’ve experimented with ketosis, leave a comment over at BenGreenfieldFitness.com/freedivingpodcast.

In the absence of ketones though, what are some other ways that we can take bigger breaths or hold our breaths for a longer period of time? What are your ninja secrets for getting a longer breath hold time?

Ted:  It is a couple of things. First off, one way is just take down–if you want to increase your breath-hold, whether you’re a freediver, spearfisherman, and [00:30:23] ______ or whatever you do underwater, you take down more fuel. So, simply taking a bigger breath. Now the average person, if they take a breath, it’s all from the chest. You probably remember from the class, we’re doing this thing where you do diaphragm, then chest, then shoulders, then neck, right? Your lungs are basically trapped inside of a cage, the rib cage. And everyone says, “Oh, my lungs aren’t that big.” Well, it’s not really your lungs that determine how big a breath you take; it’s the flexibility of that rib cage. So, when I teach my students to take a breath, I teach in a very specific manner and it’s designed to increase the size of that cage. So, if I could somehow mechanically grab your rib cage and pull it apart so it was doubled in size, your lungs could fill that up. It’s not the lungs that are limiting you, it’s the cage.

One, learning to take a bigger breath just by using the diaphragm, chest, shoulders will make a huge difference. Typically, about 20% to 30% is what my students will do. It’s hard to demonstrate that over the podcast but I do have a free course specifically on how to take 20% to 30% bigger breath. So, absolutely on that. One thing is, you want to hold your breath longer? Take a bigger breath.

Ben:  By the way, for taking a bigger breath, is that that strategy that you talk about where–and I know you have a whole course on this that I’ll link to on the podcast show notes but in a nutshell, the quick 20-second overview, you’re basically starting by breathing in from your diaphragm and then you continue that breath going up to your chest, and then you continue that breath up into the shoulders, and then you look up towards the sky, and just like you’re sipping through a straw to suck the rest of the breath in. Is that the technique you’re referring to?

Ted:  Yeah, yeah. Diaphragm, chest, shoulders. Doing that just big, big, big breath. That definitely makes a huge difference. I have students who have been freediving, who’s been spearfishing for 20, 30 years and they always look bug-eyed afterwards, “That’s the biggest breath I’ve ever taken.” Like, yeah.

Ben:  Yeah. And you can do it while you’re–I mean, you taught me how to do this while you’re essentially prone in the water, looking down, floating in your wetsuit, all you do is you–and you have a snorkel in. By the way, for those of you who don’t know, you do wear a snorkel when you freedive so you’re able to breathe as you’re looking down into the water at the fish or the line you’re going to travel down if you’re freediving. You can actually do that whole scenario if you think about it while you’re prone in the water and at the very end of the breath, you’re on your stomach but you just shove your head forward and suck, suck, suck some more, right?

Ted:  Yeah. That’s how it works. I always tell people, competitive freediving is–spearfishing and recreational freediving are not the same as competitive freediving. People tend to want to blow off competitive freedivers as this weird little subset and my point is like, “Look, competitive freedivers, we know how to dive really deep, we know how to stay down a really long time.” You should be very interested in how we do that. And competitive freedivers, they have very specific training methodologies they go through that allow them to do that. So, it definitely makes sense. It doesn’t mean you want to be a better freediver but if you want to improve your performance as a freediver, you should do all the things competitive freedivers do because it works.

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What about the use of apnea, like static apnea tables? I’m going to link to some CO2 and O2 apnea tables in the show notes, but a lot of people don’t know what those are. Can you explain what an apnea table is and what the difference would be between CO2 and O2 apnea?

Ted:  Yeah. I’ll explain what the tables are and I’m going to explain what, in my opinion, is the most time effective and efficient way to do this. Now, so a table is–you hang out with freedivers, they talk about doing tables. Table simply means you’re doing a series of breath-holds. Oftentimes, it’s eight breath-holds in a row. A table basically has two variables. It tells you how long you get to breathe up for, and then it tells you how long you breathe for.

Let’s look at a CO2 table. Well, the reason we do tables as freediving, we have to basically deal with two issues. We have to learn to tolerate low levels of oxygen because as we hold our breath, our oxygen level drops. When we consume that oxygen, CO2 is one of the waste products that’s created. When we exhale, we’re exhaling out that carbon dioxide. So, as our oxygen level drops, CO2 level is rising. We have to tolerate high levels of CO2 and low levels of oxygen.

So, a carbon dioxide table might say something like this. You breathe up for two minutes and then you hold your breath for two minutes. And then the next one, you breathe up for a minute and 45 and you hold your breath for two minutes, then you breathe up for a minute and 30, hold for two. A minute and 15, hold for two. A minute, hold for two. You’re getting less and less time and at the end, you could only breathe up for 15 seconds, hold your breath for two minutes, repeat it again. Fifteen seconds, breath up, hold for two. What’s happening is you’re only holding your breath for two minutes every time, but because you’re getting less and less time to breathe up, your carbon dioxide level is getting–your breath-hold starts with more CO2. So, therefore, at the end of the breath-hold, you’re going to have even more CO2.

That is your typical CO2 table. That was the way I was taught to do it, that’s the way I did it, but I have definitely found I think a much better way. I certainly didn’t create this. I first heard about it. It’s called the Wonka table. I believe it was from Freedive Paradise but that might not be exactly correct.

Ben:  Why’d you call it Wonka table?

Ted:  Well, Richard Wonka is the guy that invented it.

Ben:  Not Willy?

Ted:  Correct.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  It’s what I do and it’s what I teach all my students to do. There’s an inherent problem with the traditional CO2 table, and it’s as follows. If you remember I said the very last two, I said you breathe up for 15 seconds and then you hold your breath for two minutes, and then you breathe up for 15 seconds again and you hold your breath for two minutes. Now, if you have 15 seconds to breathe between two 2-minute breath-holds, there is only one possible way you can do that and you’re going to be breathing like this–

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  As fast as you can. You are going to be hyperventilating your head off. The table is designed so there’s no other way for you to pass it than to hyperventilate. Now, hyperventilation dumps your CO2, drops your CO2 level more than any possible way of breathing out there. And let’s think back. What is the point of a CO2 table? It is supposed to teach you to tolerate high levels of CO2. Well, if that’s what it’s trying to do, why would it force you to breathe in such a way that dumps as much CO2 as humanly possible in that amount of time? In my opinion, those two things are counterintuitive. They don’t go together.

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  Right? Because you’re lowering your CO2 as much as possible right before you hold your breath and you’re trying to get high CO2. So, here’s the better way. Let’s walk through this. Imagine I was going to do two–let’s call it two minutes is what we’re doing, two-minute breath-hold. Beforehand, I’m going to take five breaths; one, two, three, four, five. And then I’m going to hold my breath for two minutes. But you know what? I’d like a little bit more CO2. I want to start with more CO2. So, instead of five breaths, do you understand if I took four breaths instead of five, I would start with a little bit more carbon dioxide because I had less time to get rid of it?

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  Well, if I wanted more than four, I could do three. And if I want more than that, I could do two. You want to get the most amount of CO2 possible? You’re only allowed one breath between the two breath-holds. There’s no way possible that you’re going to have more CO2 stored in your system than if you only take one breath in between the breaths. Okay? Here’s how this works. Now, this sounds crazy, but I can–me and entry-level students can do this because here’s all I’m asking, and this is the way that I teach them to do it. All you need is a stopwatch. You don’t need an app. You don’t need to log on anywhere. It’s very simple.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  You’re going to sit on a couch.

Ben:  And what you’re about to teach us is basically this Wonka table?

Ted:  Yeah, yeah.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  CO2 table, Wonka table. You’re going to sit on a couch. Do this on dry land and not on the water and no risk of–so you may do this on dry land. You’re going to hold your breath. At some point, it’s going to be uncomfortable and you’re going to feel a contraction. I don’t care if that takes you 20 seconds. I don’t care if maybe you already got some freediving experience that might go for two minutes. It doesn’t matter what is. I don’t care. But as soon as you feel that contraction, that first hiccup, that first contraction, it’s now becoming difficult. And so, you’re going to start your stopwatch, and you’re going to only deal with that uncomfortableness for 15 seconds.

Ben:  Fifteen seconds?

Ted:  Anyone can do that.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  At the end of the 15 seconds, you’re going to take one breath and you’re going to do it very specifically like this. You’re going to do a slow inhale using your teeth and tongue to make that sound as you exhale. So, you’re going to go–

Ben:  That’s the exhale.

Ted:  And then big breath, and hold again. At some point, I don’t care if it’s 15 seconds or 2 minutes, it’s going to become difficult. What are you going to feel? Contraction. You feel that contraction, start your stopwatch and you do 15 seconds. By the way, this is going to trigger–when you do that exhalation, you are going to get a massive urge to go to the bathroom. So, if you have not gone to the bathroom before you start this, you will not be able to finish this. So, do yourself a favor, go to the bathroom before you start, then you’re good to go unless you’re going to quit. Now, the goal is when I do these–let’s say I do six. And if I’m feeling saucy, feeling good, maybe I’ll do eight. But if I can do six, I’ll still pat myself in the shoulder and say, it was a good job.

Now, what’s great about this is it’s only 15 seconds. When you took your class with me, I assure you, when you were doing statics in the pool, you went through way more than 15 seconds of uncomfortableness, right?

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  You’ll do probably minutes, minutes with an S on it when you’re like, “Good Lord, I want to breathe.” So, anyone can accomplish what I just laid out. And the idea is if it’s super easy for you, awesome. Do 20 seconds, do 30. You’re just moving that number and just making it bigger based on your ability level.

Now, the other thing I like about the CO2 table is when I used to do your traditional training, some of those tables would take me an hour and 15 minutes.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  You can do this in 10 minutes. Basically, you’re skipping all the point where it’s easy and you’re just getting right at the point of where it sucks.

Ben:  Yeah. No. The last time I talked to you, you said that you’re doing some of this stuff while you were exercising, like walking or light jogging. Is this something you can do, say if you’re out on a walk or is there too much risk of hypoxia and passing out?

Ted:  No, you’re doing this right on the couch.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  You’re not doing anything else. Now, you can incorporate breath-holding into, in essence, any exercise. For instance, when I was really into competitive freediving and trying to train, one of the things that I noticed is I was stuck at about 200 feet for maybe a year and a half because I couldn’t equalize any deeper because that kind of depth equalizing is very complicated. And eventually, I worked through that and then I started doing 65, 70 meters, and then my limit became my legs. The lactic acid because I’m doing dives for let’s say the last two–that’s two and a half minutes that I have no access to–no other options than what I took down and that you’re generating a lot of lactic acid.

One of the things that was my weakness was my legs couldn’t do it anymore. They were done. So, I would do lactic tolerance training or I’m doing almost any typical breath exercise you would do at the gym except I do super lightweight and I’ll hold my breath for 30 seconds, and that’s as many as I can, as fast as I can for 30 seconds trying to get that extreme lactic build up. So, I would do a lot of stuff with my quads and it’s brutal because you’re not breathing. You get a lot of funny looks at the gym. I would definitely–anytime you breath-hold and stop, there is a risk of blacking out. So, I would always try to do these on seated equipment. Right?

Ben:  Okay. Yeah.

Ted:  So, I’m sitting down in some way because in most of the gyms, they’re going to have places where you can do that, right?

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  I’ve heard some nice stories from people on treadmills doing this. You can imagine that can go really bad. If you [00:46:39] ______ and do it, recumbent bike is the better option.

Ben:  Yeah, exactly.

Ted:  I would do things that the–I’d do apnea walks and jog. I incorporate a lot of that stuff but basically, my world is–I don’t have access to oxygen so if I want to train as–why am I breathing while I’m training?

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  Trying to get it as close to the world I operate in as possible.

Ben:  Yeah. I’m a big fan of books like Patrick McKeown’s “Oxygen Advantage,” or there’s another one by Anders Olsson. I forget the name of his book. It’s “The Power of Your Breath,” I think is the name of it. And these guys go into the value of training yourself how to engage primarily in nasal breathing even up to relatively intense periods of exercise because that enhances oxygenation, humidifies the air, warms the air that you’re breathing in and keeps you from activating those baroreceptors in your chest that can tend to cause like a sympathetic nervous system cortisol response.

And so, a lot of times, what all do is I’ll go on a walk and I’ll have certain periods where I hold my breath for as long as possible, but the entire walk is breathing through my nose. And even the recoveries after my breath-hold are through my nose. I find that that alone, just going on those long walks seems to do a really good job with my breath-hold time, even the absence of regular apnea breath-hold practice. But I need to try these Wonka tables that you’re talking about now. Maybe I’ll make that part of a sauna session or something like, but that’s very interesting. I hadn’t heard of these tables before.

Ted:  Yeah. It’s effective. It’s time efficient. I always tell people in the class, is whenever you see me clap my hands, I get really excited about something and say, “This is going to be awesome.” Eventually, you learn that when I do that, I’m about to do something–you’re about to do something awful. These Wonka tables, they’re awesome. They are awesome.

Ben:  Yeah. Now, what about when you’re actually in the water? Let’s say somebody is out there in the water. They either want to dive deep or they’re spearfishing and they want to go down after a fish, maybe it’s–let’s say someone is used to being able to go 12 to 15 feet deep and they want to now go like, let’s just say 15 to 30 feet deep. Now, when they’re there on the surface of the water looking down on their stomach, in addition to that breath that we’re talking about where you start from your diaphragm and move your way up all the way up to your shoulders and suck in every last bit of oxygen, is there any type of breathwork that you can do in between dives or in between going down to fish that allows you to prepare for that dive in a manner that would allow you to hold your breath for a longer period of time, like is there a frequency? Like how many seconds in, how many seconds out or anything like that?

Ted:  Yes. I would say the most important thing is when you–every freediving instructor is going to teach you a different way. Some instructors, they’ll teach you–argue that, “Oh, it should be this way and this way is better than that way.” And I’ll be honest, I don’t think there really any way is that much different than any other way as long as you’re doing one thing, any freediving instructor is going to teach you diaphragmatic breathing. So, that’s absolutely what we want to be doing. And the other way to put it is you want to be conscious on how you breathe. The average person hasn’t taken any training, freediver, spearfisherman, they’re just breathing, however, they think they need to breathe. And I’m going to tell you that diaphragmatic breathing is going to be a huge improvement over that.

So, the idea is when I say diaphragmatic breathing, you want to–when you’re breathing in and out, if you’re going to put your hand on your chest and your hand on your stomach, the only thing you should feel moving is your stomach goes out and your stomach goes in. Your chest should be absolutely motionless. When I have students try this in class, no one can do this at first because we all are chest breathers. I mean, every infant is–you will look at an infant on their back and watch how they breathe, their belly goes up and down. They didn’t have to take a yoga class or a freediving class to learn diaphragmatic breathing. That’s just the way we are. As we get older for societal pressures, we are taught to never stick your stomach out. In fact, you’re supposed to walk around your stomach sucked in all the time so we lose that natural ability of diaphragmatic breathing.

But if you can teach yourself to do diaphragmatic breathing, the way you test is hand on your chest and hand on your stomach. You want to do a slow inhalation a couple of seconds, take a good breath and then just exhale. I like teeth and tongue to make this sound–so that I’m regulating how much air comes out.

Ben:  And you can still do that with a snorkel in your mouth.

Ted:  Snorkel. Yeah, absolutely.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  Snorkels in the mouth, teeth and tongue. I make that exact same sound and you just exhale to what’s comfortable, if it’s 5 seconds, 10 seconds, whatever. The main thing is to do where it’s comfortable. But what we’re doing is we are on purpose slowing our breathing down that’s going to slow our heart rate down. I can, when I’m out freediving, whatever I’m doing, I can 99% of the time breath like that. Now, can I sprint around like that? No, but if you’re doing things right, you shouldn’t be doing that because the more you raise your heart rate, the more you lower your bottom time. I’m breathing like that the entire time. I’m out there on the surface the whole time, slow, relaxed, diaphragmatic breathing just like what you would do at a yoga class. You walk out of a yoga class and you’re like, “Oh, my God, I feel so relaxed.” Why? Because you did diaphragmatic breathing for 15 minutes. That’s why you feel good.

Ben:  Do you have a certain period of time where you’re doing the inhale and the exhale? Is it 5 seconds in, 10 seconds out or have rules like that?

Ted:  It doesn’t matter. I mean, I typically do 2 seconds in, 10 seconds out, but what’s more–

Ben:  Two in, 10 out.

Ted:  Yeah. But what’s more important than the numbers is that it’s whatever is comfortable for you and that you are controlling your breathing instead of not thinking about it. Because if you’re not thinking about it, you’re going to be–having the tendency to breath more like that, which is going to increase the heart rate and just not be relaxing.

Ben:  Yeah, yeah. Okay. Now, what about when it comes to the idea of getting down to that depth that you want to get to? A lot of people do, and this is what many of us are taught when we’re in the pool when we’re kids or whatever and we figure this out on our own, this whole Valsalva maneuver where you just plug your nose and go–trying to equalize that way. Why doesn’t that work when you get–I mean, for me once I get to about 15 feet or so, that doesn’t work. So, why doesn’t that work and what should we be doing instead?

Ted:  Yeah. Valsalva is the way most people are taught to equalize. I, as a scuba instructor, that’s the way I teach people to equalize and it’s very simple. The reason scuba instructors do it is, one, they don’t really understand the difference between Valsalva and Frenzel and it’s very simple to teach. I’ve got a 12-year-old kid in a scuba class and I’m like, “Hey, little Johnny. Can you equalize your ears?” “Uh-huh.” “Okay. Can you pinch your nose, Johnny?” “Uh-huh.” “Now, blow your nose real hard.” He’s like, “Oh, my ears.” Exactly, right?

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  It’s called the pinch and blow method. You pinch your nose and you blow your nose, that equalizes your ears. Now, here’s where things get confusing, especially because we get a lot of scuba divers take the class. If you use Valsalva as a scuba diver, you can scuba dive to 200 feet using that. It’ll work fine. We run into issues–I’ve had scuba instructors take my class and get stuck at 15 feet. I’m trying to explain to them, “Look, man, you need to be doing Frenzel.” And they’re like, “Yeah, Ted. I’m a scuba instructor. I can breathe through my ears just fine,” and then they get stuck at 15 feet and they’re like, “Alright, what is this whole Frenzel thing?”

There’s another method of equalization called Frenzel that as freedivers, we have to be doing. Valsalva will typically stop working for a freediver around 50 or 30 feet–I mean, 15 to 30 feet.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  Now, you’ll see people go, “I can do Valsalva down to 50 feet.” Yeah, but they don’t dive down straight like a laser. They dive at a 45-degree angle and then every time they equalize, they have to turn their head up until their head’s at the surface then they can equalize and they turn back down. What a terribly inefficient way to get down to depth. If you want to go down straight like a laser just boom, boom, boom, pinch your nose and equalize every time, you have to be doing Frenzel.

Now, I’ll answer your question. Why doesn’t Valsalva work? Here’s why. When you’re doing a Valsalva–like imagine a scuba diver. So, scuba diver, when they go down to depths, typically they’re head up feet down. That’s the way that they go down. So, their head’s facing the surface. Every time you take a breath off your regulator as a scuba diver, your lungs are fully inflated. When your head is facing the surface, the air naturally wants to go to your ears because air rises. So, when you’re scuba diving, you’re in this position where your head up, the air naturally wants to go that way and so it’s very simple to equalize your ears. Now, as a freediver, we turn around. Now, our feet are facing the surface and our head is towards the bottom. So, when we started diving down, the air wants to go to our fins but we want it down here by our head. And what’s happening to the supply of air as we go down? It’s shrinking, shrinking, shrinking, shrinking.

That’s why Valsalva doesn’t work. It’s squeezing the air. It’s squeezing and ever and ever-shrinking supply of air and trying to push it the way it doesn’t want to go. And that’s why it typically doesn’t work ’til around 15, 30 feet. If I remember in your class, in the beginning, you were doing Valsalva and you were stuck right at that depth. It didn’t matter how hard you pushed, didn’t matter what you did, you’re just stuck, right?

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  Freedivers need to be doing what’s called the Frenzel method of equalization. Valsalva takes the air that’s in your lungs, your throat is open, you’re compressing your chest and lung and stomach and you’re pushing that air into your ears. You can tell if you’re doing Valsalva very simply. Put your hand on your stomach, pinch your nose, equalize five times in a row. Boom, boom, boom. If you feel your chest compressing every time you’re doing that, you’re doing Valsalva. Frenzel, completely different animal. Frenzel takes the air that’s in your mouth and shoves it directly into your ears, and your throat is shut so your lungs are not involved or whatsoever and you’re doing this whole thing. They always say use your tongue as a piston and push the air into the Eustachian tubes. So, Frenzel doesn’t have that depth limitation.

Ben:  By the way, that’s F-R-E-N-Z-E-L, right?

Ted:  Correct.

Ben:  Yup.

Ted:  Yeah. And so that’s the method that freedivers have to do. It’s tricky to teach.

Ben:  When I interrupted you, you were beginning to say how Frenzel would differ from Valsalva.

Ted:  Well, yes. I mean, Frenzel, it takes the air that’s in your mouth as opposed to the air that’s in your lungs and you’re using your tongue to push that air into the Eustachian tube instead of compressing your chest and stomach and shoving that air into the ears.

Ben:  Okay. Alright. So, the way that you would actually learn the Frenzel technique, and I know that you have courses on this online, you do one-on-one Skype sessions with people like you did it with me leading up to that freediving course that I did with you, but what’s the basic overview of what the Frenzel would sound like or look like or be accomplished?

Ted:  It’s very, very, very tricky to teach. That’s why you should spend an hour with every student on Skype. Now, as you know, I don’t do that anymore. They get the online program and I love it. They just walk in the door and they can do Frenzel. It makes my life so much easier. I don’t have to do another 500 hours of Skype sessions. But the simple explanation–and sometimes it works, sometimes literally, they take it up instantaneously. So, if you want to try that, put your tongue in the position like you would make the T sound–if you think about that, the tip of your tongue is on the back of your teeth. The sides of your tongue are down the molars.

Frenzel is you put your tongue in that position, and if you can imagine what that does, is that creates like a sandwich. The tongue is the bottom part of the sandwich, the bottom loaf of bread, and the middle is the air that’s trapped in between your tongue, and then the top slice of bread is the roof of your mouth. What you’re trying to do is you put your tongue in that position, you shut your throat, you pinch your nose, and you try to push your tongue up to the roof of the mouth. So, what that’s going to do is it’s going to compress that air that’s stuck in there and it’s going to try to make it come out your nose, but your nose is pinched so it can’t go out that way. That’s why you’ll see the nostrils flare and then it will go into the ears.

So, you can try it with what I call the T Block, doing it like that. Another way you can do it is what’s called the K Block, when you make the K sound. The middle of your tongue is on the roof of the mouth. So, again, the same thing. You can start to make the K sound where the middle of your tongue is on the roof of your mouth, but instead of making the K sound, you don’t let that air go forward. Right when the middle of your tongue hits the top of the roof your mouth, the back of your tongue pushes up while you pinch the nose. And you can do it that way. So, those are two ways that people do that is the T Block or the K Block. And some people who can just–I tell them that and they’re like, “What’s the big fuss?” Some people pick it up quite easily but what’s difficult is if you’re a life-long Valsalver, then that explanation probably isn’t going to cut it. It’s the people that have been doing it one way for a long time. It’s difficult to transition them over.

Ben:  Yeah, especially when you’re stressed out and maybe have a speargun in your hand, you’re going after a fish, you have to make it almost like second nature. That’s what I’d found. Like I thought I had it nailed when I did dry land training and then once I got in the water and have all these other things going through my head, I just lost it. So, it takes a lot of practice to learn, but man, now that I know Frenzel, it’s easy, like you go down and you just do it.

Ted:  You’ll never think about it. Once the light bulb goes off–like beforehand, it seems like, “Good Lord, there’s like 13 steps I have to do with my tongue. I’m not going to ever freedive. I can’t even do it sitting on the couch.” Then once the light bulb goes off, you’re never going to think about again.

Ben:  Yeah. The best tip I can give to people is go do it in a pool first. Even if it’s just like your local YMCA pool or whatever, which might go down to 15 feet, you can at least play around with it without having to worry about the ocean and distractions and the cold. You just go down and practice it in the pool. And especially people who might be at the gym anyways, doing a lap swim session or lifting weights or whatever, that’s simple enough to just hop in the pool and do it. I find that that works far better than practicing on dry land because once you’re in the water, it’s a little bit different. It feels different and it works differently.

Now, I also want to ask you because this is obviously extremely popular, this whole idea of Wim Hof and Wim Hof breathwork where you do like a whole bunch of power breaths. Then after you’ve done like 30 power breaths, you breathe off as much oxygen as possible and you just hold your breath for as long as you can. I mean, it’s essentially almost like hyperventilating followed by a breath hold. What is your take on that for increasing breath hold time or doing like Wim Hof does, which is where you’ll do that and then you’ll get in cold water and sometimes go underwater and cold water?

Ted:  Okay. I’ve heard about Wim Hof breathing. I’ve had other freediving instructors talk to me about it, and in essence, what it seemed like to me was you just hyperventilate your head off. And I did some Google and I saw I am teaching people to do it, and in essence, it’s a lot of hyperventilation before breath-hold. So, I don’t know anything about cold. I’m assuming it’s really good for that.

Ben:  Yeah. Well, I mean the cold component, I think, is just that you’re inducing vasodilation through that power breathing. So, essentially, you’re actually shoving blood to your extremities that could allow you to withstand the stressors of cold a little bit more. But I’m interested in comparing and contrasting that breath-hold technique to your breath-hold technique.

Ted:  Yeah, for sure. What I was getting at is as a cold person, maybe that’s great for cold. As a breath-holding tool, there’s any freediving instructor from any agency on any continent would tell you, you don’t want do that because hyperventilating before a breath-hold increases the risk for blackout. Now, most of his stuff he’s doing in dry land, as I understand it, but this is extremely dangerous.

Ben:  Well, I think Wim himself–and he’s been a podcast guest a couple of times. I think he’s almost passed out like underwater, like under the ice doing this.

Ted:  Yeah. So, I mean, as a freediving instructor, and this is not me, you ask any freediving instructor, they will tell you absolutely under no circumstance–I mean even freediving instructors that hate each other will say, “Don’t hyperventilate before breath-hold because it absolutely increases the risk of blackout.” That’s why every freediving agency teaches that. So, let me explain why that’s happening.

Now, hyperventilation, as I mentioned earlier on top of the CO2 tables, it drastically lowers your CO2. It makes it so that when you start that breath-hold, your CO2 is as low as possible. One of the biggest triggers for your urge to breathe is your carbon dioxide levels, right? Your physiologist will say 80% of your urge to breathe comes from rising carbon dioxide and 20% of it comes from low oxygen. So, hyperventilation has a pretty obvious advantage.

Since you start with lower carbon dioxide, it’s going to take longer for that CO2 level to get to where you have an urge to breathe or a contraction. So, if you have a breath-hold where you just hold your breath normally and you wait ’til you have a contraction, let’s call it two minutes, and then you go backwards in time and you hyperventilate a bunch, then you hold your breath again, now you might not get that contraction until 230 because you started with less carbon dioxide. So, hyperventilating absolutely delays your urge to breathe. I will not deny that it does that because it certainly does. This why so many beginners like me when I started, I remember freediving down to 20 foot of water and I’d stay there for like 20, 25 seconds and I felt like I was going to die and then my captain told me to hyperventilate. Then I went to that same spot, I could stay down there for like 45, 50 seconds because it’s delaying the onset of the urge to breath.

Now, here’s the other thing that it does that people don’t understand, and this is why every freediving instructor says don’t hyperventilate. Not only does it delay the urge to breathe, but it also physically reduces the amount of oxygen available to your body. This is a bad combination.

Ben:  The Bohr. Can you get into the Bohr effect?

Ted:  When we hold our breath, our blood is becoming more acidic. As our blood is becoming more acidic, that’s changing the pH levels of our blood. So, when we hyperventilate, what that does is it’s increasing the strength of the bond between hemoglobin and oxygen. So, if I’m holding my breath, I’ve got all these hemoglobin molecules running around through my bloodstream, the hemoglobin molecule has little oxygen molecules attached to it. That’s how it transports the oxygen, and then it pops off the oxygen and gives it to the muscle tissue so I can use it. If the strength of the bond between hemoglobin and oxygen is too high, that oxygen molecule can’t pop off and be used as fuel. So, it’s stuck to the hemoglobin. So, when we hyperventilate, it’s altering the pH levels of our blood and it doesn’t allow that oxygen to be used because it’s dropping the pH level before the breath-hold.

As the blood becomes more acidic, the strength between the hemoglobin and oxygen gets less and then we can actually use that oxygen because it’s shifting it so much the wrong way in the beginning, now at the end of the breath-hold, there’s still oxygen stuck on the hemoglobin that we can’t access. That’s why it’s limiting the amount of oxygen available to your body, but it’s confusing especially for beginners because they hyperventilate and they can instantly hold their breath longer. And then you get people saying, “Oh, yeah. Well, you just got to hyperventilate and it lets you access all the oxygen.” They say that because they’re holding their breath longer so it seems logical, but the facts are it’s not.

Ben:  Yeah. Essentially, you have less oxygen available to the tissue but also a lowered urge to breathe, and that’s why when you’re doing the Wim Hof breathing, you can hold your breath for a longer period of time, but it’s also why you get the lightheadedness and the tingling and the potential for passing out. And I personally have found that when I jump into a cold pool–all right, I have cold bath protocols I do and I have some of my clients do this. Like one of our workouts we do is you get three minutes in the ice or a very cold bath but you precede that with Wim Hof breathing. You slip into that bath while you’re on your breath-hold. You’re not in deep water. You’re in a tub. You’re typically with someone. And in that tub full of water then you get out and you do another round of breathing to warm yourself back up, and sometimes a lot of people hit the bike for a few minutes then get back in the water. But I’ll never combine that with actually going underwater or deep water. I’m pretty remiss to even do the Wim Hof breathing with the breath-holds and be near water unless somebody else is there, even if it’s shallow water.

Ted:  Yeah, it is. It absolutely increases the risk for blackout. Take a look at competitive freedivers. They do the exact opposite. So, basically, if you understand what I was getting at is the more acidic your blood gets, the lower the strength of bond between hemoglobin and oxygen, meaning oxygen is more accessible. Well, this seems like a good thing, right? If you look at like a competitive freediver world record holder, they’re saying, “Carbon dioxide is my friend. I want as much carbon dioxide in my blood as possible so that I can more quickly make that shift to where the oxygen becomes more readily accessible.” So, if you watch a competitive freediver breathing up, they might be doing what I would call minimal breathing where they’re breathing out–just like they’re sitting on the couch doing nothing. That’s the way they’re breathing because they want to keep every amount of carbon dioxide in their blood as possible so they can shift that way.

Now, thanks to the wonderful world of the internet. People will be like, “Oh, Ted. Well, why don’t you teach the way these top freediving world records do it? Why are you teaching different clearing methods that don’t work?” I said, “Are you a world record freediver?” “Well, no.” “Well, then you shouldn’t breath like one because what they do, they understand, they’re trying to get that extra little bit of advantage. They certainly get an advantage of doing that, but what happens? Because they start with more carbon dioxide, the contractions come way earlier. The dive becomes way more terrible, way more difficult of all these other things. Yeah, if you’re a world record freediver, your goal is to dive deep as humanly possible. You don’t care how terrible you feel because you’re going to train that out of it. But the average Joe–I mean, Ben, do you want your 80-foot dives to feel harder than they were?

Ben:  No.

Ted:  Than what you did? Probably not.

Ben:  It’s already hard as it was.

Ted:  Exactly. People have access to information on the internet, and sometimes, they don’t understand how it’s most applicable.

Ben:  Yeah, yeah.

Ted:  So, you want it middle ground, which is what I teach.

Ben:  That was a gnarly adventure. When we’d got in the ocean, remember, like a tornado but we had sharks circling around us that you showed us how to point our–I think you were–we weren’t spearfishing. So, you have a gun but you had like some kind of a long pole or object in your hand and you showed us how you could point it out and the shark would go away. So, I burst one of my eardrums, still trying to learn Frenzel. So, I’m bleeding. I didn’t burst the eardrum but I was bleeding out my nose and I thought I’d killed off half my brain. And then we finally get in the boat to go back. We’re all shivering. We’re starved. We’ve gone through that rite of passage in the water and then this tornado blows in off the Fort Lauderdale Coast and we’re like racing in a boat to get back.

Ted:  That was an unusual trip.

Ben:  Yeah, but it was fun. I don’t want to scare people away but it was actually pretty cool. It made my other dives feel easy.

Ted:  Well, I was just so ecstatic when you finally got Frenzel because the first two days, you’re stuck at 15 feet and I’m like–but I could tell you were that close to being like, “No, I’m not coming out the third day and I’m not coming.” And then the light bulb went off and boom, you got it.

Ben:  Yeah. No. To nail 80 feet, it felt good. I can’t fish at 80 feet but it felt good to just be that deep in the water and know I’d been that deep. How about how freedivers exercise? I remember you showed us, and I’d love for you to get into this, like how you exercise the diaphragm. You have like the number one stretch that you recommend for freedivers, but are there any other things that–like in the freediving community that people have–because you’re very connected to that community, ways that people exercise or ways that people stretch any typical like gym routines. What’s the training protocol look like when you’re out of the water?

Ted:  Well, you look at most competitive freedivers, they’re all going to be extremely fit. They’re athletes, so that’s not their–they do whatever they do to get fit. But competitive freedivers has this very weird thing. Certainly, because we’re athletes, you want to have a high VO2 max. It’s like almost any athlete would. Now, high VO2 max comes with hard training, which does watch our metabolism, raises it. As a freediver, do we want a high metabolism?

Ben:  No.

Ted:  No. We want the lowest.

Ben:  That was why you wouldn’t even let us drink a damn cup of coffee before we got up.

Ted:  So, there’s that weird thing, and I’ll be honest, we don’t–I don’t know the perfect answer but the idea is so they might have–if you look at training progression leading up to a competition, there’s going to be some point where they’re going to be doing all your typical cardio, however they want to do it. And then as they’re getting closer and closer to the event, they’re going to be doing more apnea, more breath-holding work. And then towards the end, maybe the last two weeks, they turn into a sloth. All they’re going to do is hold their breath on the couch, or maybe do some workouts in the pool where they’re trying to lower that metabolism.

It is a very tricky thing to train at at a high level because I don’t know of any sport where that’s important where you have those two competing issues. The other thing that’s tricky about it is we don’t know the answer. Now, if you want to become the–if you’re a U.S. speed skater and you’re like top speed skater in high school, they just put you on some campus and there’s a whole program and there are doctors and there are researchers and they just–they know how to make the best speed skater. They just put you through the program. We as freedivers, there’s no money in the sport, so we don’t have all of that. Not only we don’t have that and what we’re trying to solve is incredibly complicated.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  So, it’s tricky.

Ben:  Is there any type of gym routine or any type of stretching routine or anything like that? Because you showed me that one stretch and I’m curious when people go to the gym, are they doing like high rep/low weight, low rep/high weight or any insight into that?

Ted:  In most circumstances, you’re not going to see big, bulky freedivers, in most circumstances. There are some that are actually pretty built that do very well. [01:16:00] ______, he’s a big guy, right?

Ben:  Right.

Ted:  But most, kind of you jokingly talked about, the then mild-mannered freediver. You’re going to see a lot in that way. If you’re looking at the world record static guys that they’re doing the maximum breath-holds, they’re very extremely skinny. They’re going to be not eating. They’re going to be fasting to do everything they can to put their self in starvation mode. But as far as typical gym training, I don’t think there’s anything super special in particular to what they’re doing. Most of them are just–they want their good cardio and they’re not trying to bulk up on muscles.

Ben:  So, it’s almost like cycling where a cyclist is going for a very good power to weight ratio and a lot of cyclists don’t do a lot of strength training for that reason, at least traditional hypertrophic strength training. But you could make an argument that you want low amounts of muscle mass but the muscle that you want would be like lean, wiry muscle that doesn’t take up a lot of space, but that’s very efficient metabolically.

Ted:  And in the areas that you need it. Like if you’re doing constant weight of the ocean, you’re going to need some power in the quads to get yourself back up from 200, 300, 400 feet or whatever you’re coming from. I would say the biggest thing, the thing that they will all do is that idea of diaphragmatic stretching which is really, really critical. So, I can do a very quick exercise all your listeners can do to prove the power of that diaphragm.

Ben:  Okay.

Ted:  Okay. So, all I’m going to ask them to do is just follow my instructions for just a bit. You only have to hold your breath for 15, 20 seconds maximum. I alluded to this earlier. Your physiologist will tell you that 80% of the urge to breath comes from high carbon dioxide levels and 20% comes from low oxygen levels. I always start with that story in the class and we’re going to pretend that physiologist is sitting in the back and he’s going to be doing the same exercise with us.

Here’s the exercise. We’re all going to do it together. You want to be sitting down. You want to make sure there’s space in front of you so if you bend down and put your head between your legs, you’re not going to bunk onto anything. Here’s the deal. You’re going to take a big breath.

Ben:  Pull over the car.

Ted:  Alright. So, biggest breath you can. Now, we’re going to exhale the air out. All of it. You’re going to bend over and push out every bit. Push, push, push, push. Now, you’re going to hold your breath, sit up, and we’re going to hold our breath for 10, maybe 15 seconds. Keep holding your breath if you can. If you’ve already breathed, that’s fine. Alright. Five, four, three, two, one, take a breath.

Ben:  Oh, I got to pee. There comes the pee.

Ted:  Right. So, if you guys did that, you’d probably say that was one of the worst feelings that you’ve ever felt, especially if you actually exhaled all the air out. If you didn’t exhale all the air out, do it again. I promise you, it’ll be terrible.

Now, let’s look at what just happened there. The physiologist will tell you 80% of the urge to breath comes from CO2 and 20% comes from low oxygen. Alright. And I’ve done this. I wrote an article in Spearing Magazine just recently, and it’s going to be coming out in a month, actually, in a couple of weeks, about this exact same thing. I used a pulse oximeter in the middle of that exercise. So, pulse oximeter measures my oxygen level in my blood. And when I did that exercise, it started at 98%, and when I was done, it was 98%. So, the oxygen level of my blood didn’t alter at all, which means that the urge to breathe didn’t come from oxygen, but we expected that because 20% comes from oxygen, 80% comes from carbon dioxide. So, it must be the carbon dioxide.

Let’s look at that. How is carbon dioxide created? It’s created by consuming oxygen. How long do we hold our breath for? Fifteen, 20 seconds. So, that means we created 15- or 20-seconds worth of carbon dioxide. The exact same amount of carbon dioxide was created in that exercise than if you just held your breath for 15 seconds normally where you would get no urge to breathe. So, this means the low oxygen level didn’t trigger the urge to breathe, and the high carbon dioxide didn’t trigger the urge to breathe because both of those are absolutely normal. So, now the physiologist in the back of the room is scratching his head like, “Well, why did I feel like I wanted to die?” It’s because I would say 80% urge to breathe comes from carbon dioxide, 20% comes from low oxygen, plus there are other factors. As a freediving instructor, I’ll put in that there are other factors, and that’s the diaphragm.

Your diaphragm, now unless you’re a freediver who trains or a competitive freediver, you have never exhaled all the air out and then sat there. Your diaphragm got stretched in the way that it has never been stretched before. So, in essence, as you exhale all that air out, your diaphragm–as your lungs shrink, your diaphragm gets sucked in to fill the void. So, your diaphragm is getting sucked in up, up, up and it’s a muscle just like your hamstring and it got stretched in a way that it has never been stretched before. So, what it did–if you stretch your hamstring too far, you’re going to get a signal that says back off. Quit bending forward, bend backwards to loosen that because the hamstring can’t take it.

When your diaphragm gets stretched too far, guess what it does? It says, “That’s too far.” So, how would that diaphragm go back to normal? If you took a breath. So, it’s triggering an urge to breathe to reset your diaphragm. So, that urge to breathe in this particular example had nothing to do with your oxygen levels, had nothing to do with your CO2 levels, was completely triggered by the inflexibility of your diaphragm. It’s the inflexibility of the diaphragm that’s causing that. That’s also why as a freediver if you have somebody who maybe have freediving experience, like my students, they’re freedivers already and I say, “Look, every student in my class has some depth where they go to and they feel fine. Maybe it’s 15 feet, maybe it’s 30, 40 feet. They get to the bottom, they feel no urge to breathe, they feel totally calm and relaxed. Every one of those students has a depth where you put 15 foot under that, 15 foot deeper, they get down there, they feel antsy, they feel uncomfortable. “I got to get out here. I can’t handle this. I don’t feel good.” But why is that happening?

It’s because when they went down deeper, their lungs got compressed more, their diaphragm got sucked into the point where “That’s too much. I’m not comfortable with that level of stretch.” and that why it triggers that urge to breathe. That’s why every competitive freediver on the planet stretches their diaphragm because it makes you more comfortable at depth. It helps [01:23:01] ______ and does a lot of stuff. That’s something that most people don’t understand. And I’m always talking to my typical student who’s a spearfisherman and they tend to want to poo poo on all this. They’re like, “Competitive freediving has nothing to do with spearfishing.” I’m like, “Look, we dive really deep. We stay down a really long time. You should learn exactly how we do that and then do it for what you’re doing.”

Ben:  Yeah. Interesting. By the way, returning back to the piece about stretching the diaphragm. I think that one other thing people should consider would be in many cases, there are like fascial adhesions, there’s immobility in a lot of the muscles around of the diaphragm. Paul Chek talks about this in some of his videos about foam rolling the diaphragm. I have my massage therapist actually do massage therapy especially on either side of my rib cage. And you can do some of this yourself like digging your fingers up underneath the rib cage while you’re taking your breath. But it’s shocking to me how many people will get their IT bands massaged or their calves or their traps but not do any work on the fascia that surrounds the abdomen and the diaphragm.

So, I think that that’s a very important component. And the other thing that I wanted to bring up, returning back to the training was, you know what I think is probably the best form of training that someone interested in freediving could do? I’ll assume by your silence that you’re just waiting with bated breath, pun intended, pun intended. Would be what Laird Hamilton does at his training pool where he’ll have a bunch of people over and they do this Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday in Malibu from like 8:00 to 11:00 a.m. They’ve got a whole bunch of people over. Everybody’s got a buddy. There’re people monitoring the whole program but you’re in the water with dumbbells, carrying the dumbbells back and forth under the water. You’re swimming with the dumbbell-like treading water with a dumbbell between your legs. You’re doing jumps from the bottom of the pool while hoisting the dumbbell upwards. And you’re basically doing an entire workout in the water.

And what I like about that is Laird developed it for being able to survive the mental and physical rigors of being under the water for long periods of time when the surf tows you under or you’re thrown off your board and in the waves. Also, what I like about it is you get this amazing cardiovascular and breath flow workout but you’re not sore the next day, meaning that you’re not inducing muscle mass or hypertrophy. It’s exhausting. You’re cold. You’re tired. You’re hungry afterwards just like a freediving session. I actually interviewed him, and in that interview with him–I’ll link to some articles with like samples of their workouts and stuff like that, but I was thinking as you’re talking about the diaphragm stretching, I’m like, “Gosh, I think more freedivers should know about the kind of stuff Laird is doing in his pool because man, not only is it a blast but you’re not sore, you’re not building a bunch of muscle mass but you’re training blood and lungs tremendously.” I’ll link to that in the show notes as well, my podcast with him, but I think that could be a good way to go for some people.

Ted:  Yeah. I’m pretty sure he went through the big wave surf program that PFI does.

Ben:  Yeah.

Ted:  Where we go through all that sort of stuff. So, it’s pretty cool.

Ben:  Very cool. Very cool. Well, I know we’re getting towards the end of the show but I wanted you to really just walk us through quickly here the different courses that you teach. I mentioned that you have one on breath-holding and these are just courses people can take online. You’ve got one on the Frenzel technique. What else do you have?

Ted:  The one I’m honestly the most excited about is, I launched it from the [1:26:47] ______ Recording four or five days ago. It’s freedivingsafety.com. Alright. So, the idea of this course is it’s an online resource that teaches people safe freediving practices from a trusted and reliable source, and it’s free. My whole taking is this. For the past 10 years, I’ve been teaching these classes and you sat through my class. You know I’m passionate about freediving safety. And the reason is there are 50 to 75 fatalities per year in this sport of freediving, mostly incurs in spearfishing, but we’re getting growing, growing number of people doing stuff in the pool because they saw some YouTube video, some guy telling them to do something in a pool but they don’t have safety. They don’t understand.

For 10 years, I’ve been dealing with the spearfishing community and what I always hear is, “Ted, I love taking those courses, but my boss, man, he’s such a pain in the–I can never get the time off,” or, “I can’t afford the course.” So, the way I look at it is you want to get better at freediving? Yeah, you’re going to pay and take a course just like anything. But if you want to learn how to be safe, if you want to learn to not kill yourself, there’s no barrier to that.

So, the idea is it’s an online course. It’s got basically an hour worth of videos. You’re going to learn the rules, safe freediving practices. You’re going to learn the myth of, “I don’t push myself. I know my limits. I would know before I blackout.” Because the reality is most circumstances you wouldn’t. I have a video footage of a spearfisherman with 30 years of experience. He’s spearfishing at 50 feet, which is a total number of depths for him. He did seven dives at that exact same depth and you see him coming up from a dive and 10 feet in the surface, he has no idea what’s wrong. He blacks out. He exhaled all his air out and you see him start to sink down.

Now, the video recorder was a friend of mine and an instructor, [01:28:28] ______ Chapman took care of him. He is fine. But I always have been trying to get across this point that when you’re diving in the ocean, people say, “I’ve never had a problem. I don’t push myself. I’m not that worried about it.” The physics of it is that on most dives in the ocean if you were to have a blackout, you’d feel 100% fine the whole time. So, saying that you don’t push yourself, it’s going to explain that. And then it also has video. I hired two camera guys at multiple camera angles on what to do if you have a [01:28:54] _______, what to do if you have a blackout at the surface. I’ve launched the course just four or five days ago. I’ve already had 150 people on it and people are–the response has been very good and I’m very excited about it.

Ben:  And that one’s freedrivingsafety.com?

Ted:  Safety.com. Yeah.

Ben:  Okay. I’ll link to that in the show notes and then you’ve got all these other courses like how to make the mammalian dive reflex work for you and the spearfishing checklist, the guide on how to mitigate the risks of freediving, the guide on equalizing, the guide on taking a 30% bigger breath. I’ll link to all of those so that you guys can just delve into all of Ted’s knowledge, and that is all going to be over at BenGreenfieldFitness.com/freedivingpodcast. That’s BenGreenfieldFitness.com/freedivingpodcast.

You got me excited, Ted, because I’m headed down to Kona to do some bow hunting next month. I’m going to throw in a couple of days of going after a tasty fish. So, thank you for opening me up to this whole world of freediving and spearfishing, man. You’re my guru in this department.

Ted:  I enjoyed working with you and I’m excited to hear how the trip to Hawaii goes. And if you want any suggestions for who to hook up with there, definitely let me know.

Ben:  Sweet. Alright, folks. Well, I’m Ben Greenfield along with Ted Harty signing out from BenGreenfieldFitness.com. Have an amazing week.

Well, thanks for listening to today’s show. You can grab all the shownotes, the resources, pretty much everything that I mentioned over at BenGreenfieldFitness.com, along with plenty of other goodies from me, including the highly helpful “Ben Recommends” page, which is a list of pretty much everything that I’ve ever recommended for hormone, sleep, digestion, fat loss, performance, and plenty more. Please, also, know that all the links, all the promo codes, that I mentioned during this and every episode, helped to make this podcast happen and to generate income that enables me to keep bringing you this content every single week. When you listen in, be sure to use the links in the shownotes, use the promo codes that I generate, because that helps to float this thing and keep it coming to you each and every week.

In my article entitled “How Breath-Holding, Blood-Doping, Shark-Chasing, Free-Diving & Ketosis Can Activate Your Body’s Most Primal Reflex,” I mentioned the fascinating book by James Nestor, entitled “Deep: Freediving, Renegade Science, and What the Ocean Tells Us About Ourselves.”

After reading it two years ago, I hired Ted Harty, from Immersion Freediving in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida, to certify me in freediving so that I could learn how to spearfish.

At over six feet tall and 230 solid pounds, Ted is a big, bold, loud, extroverted character. He looks like a boxer and not like a guy who you’d expect to be diving at incredibly efficient oxygen capacity to depths deeper than most human beings have ever ventured.

But it was Ted who was about to open my eyes to a whole new world of freediving and who I spent nearly every waking moment of ninety-six hours of my life with learning every possible closely-guarded breath-holding and deep-diving tactic.

Ted began his underwater career in 2005 as a scuba instructor in the Florida Keys. Over the years, Ted became a Scuba Schools International Instructor and a Professional Association of Diving Instructors Staff Instructor.

But whenever Ted was on the boat and did not have students to take care of, he’d jump in with mask, fins, and snorkel and play around on the reef, sans scuba equipment. As Ted highlights in this fascinating, quick video about his life:

“Sometimes I’d have just five minutes to swim around without all of my scuba gear. I loved it. I could swim down to the sand at Sombrero Reef and hang out for a bit at 20 feet. I wanted more. I wanted to learn how to stay down longer and how to dive deeper.”

So, in January of 2008, Ted took his first Performance Freediving International (PFI) course.

“I couldn’t believe how little I knew about freediving at the time. As a scuba instructor I knew more about diving physiology than the average Joe, but quickly realized I knew nothing about freediving. At the start of the course I had a 2:15 breath-hold, but after just four days of training, I did a five-minute hold! I couldn’t believe it was possible.”

Next, Ted signed up for instructor-level courses at Performance Freediving. He was soon offered a job teaching with Performance Freediving when he moved to Fort Lauderdale.

Then, in 2009 Ted went to PFI’s annual competition. At the time, he was about an 80- to 90-foot freediver and weighed 230 pounds. He wasn’t in good shape at all, but after three weeks of training under the tutelage of world-renowned freedivers Kirk Krack and Mandy-Rae Cruickshank, he did a 54 meter (177 -feet) freedive.

“I was blown away by what I was capable of.”

Ted spent a year working with Kirk and Mandy while traveling around the country teaching the Intermediate Freediver program. Then, in 2010, a much more fit Ted went back to PFI’s annual competition. That year his new personal best was 213 feet, and currently, he’s managed to up that to an impressive 279 feet.

In June 2012, Ted was selected as the Team Captain for the US Freediving Team at the Freediving World Championships, and in 2013 he attained PFI Advanced Instructor and PFI Instructor Trainer, becoming the first and only PFI independent instructor to receive this rating.

Oh yeah, and Ted also holds the record for hypoxic underwater swimming in the pool, having done 7 full lengths (175 meters) without a single breath. 

But most impressive?

Ted has anemia.

This means his blood can’t deliver oxygen as efficiently to his muscles and brain as most of the world’s population. This means he has a blood hematocrit level of 34, easily 1/3 less than most athletes. This is a condition that would leave most folks huffing and puffing for air after climbing a flight of stairs.

Obviously, anemia hasn’t stopped Ted. In our last podcast, which you can listen to here, Ted and I covered:

-Why being cold and cold water can actually inhibit your ability to hold your breath…

-How to use static apnea tables to enhance your ability to tolerate high levels of CO2 and low levels of O2…

-Why training your mammalian dive reflex is so useful, even if you have zero desire to do long breath-holds or freediving competition…

-Why you should avoid hyperventilation and “blowing off CO2” prior to a breath hold…

-The difference between Ted’s breathing techniques and Wim Hof’s breathing techniques…

-And much more…

Today Ted is back, and we take a deep dive (pun intended) into:

-What happens to the body during free diving…9:30

Similar effects as yoga

Alter how you breathe

Interact with marine life

Stress release

-What the “mammalian dive reflex” is and why we would want to activate it…12:25

Genetically coded in every human on the planet

Dolphins, seals, whales possess the mammalian dive reflex

We all have it, but at different levels depending on experience

Several components:

Bradycardia; Body lowers demand for oxygen

Fingers, toes constrict

Pee reflex – peripheral extremities constrict

We don’t have conclusive data on how free diving affects HRV and the vagus nerve

The connection between the spleen and breath holding/free diving

Another component of the mammalian dive reflex

Simply holding one’s breath on dry land compresses the spleen

Legal blood doping

In elite athletes, holding breath compresses spleen; an ordinary person, not so much

In free diving, your body becomes more accustomed to these changes

Large amounts of blood circulate through the spleen; compressing it leads to a large release of red blood cells

Breath holds in the sauna activate the spleen; not the same effects as diving

-The benefits of free diving…24:37

Overall well-being

Q: How can drowning and suffocating be relaxing? A: You don’t feel that way

People swear by its efficacy

Comparable to training to lose weight

How many calories are lost during free diving:

It’s absolutely exhausting

Generate tremendous amount of body heat

Study: 1,100 calories burned per hour

Breathwork wouldn’t translate to burning calories

Glycogen sparing effect

Ketones increase the ability to hold breath

-Tips for increasing breath hold time…30:10

Take a bigger breath

Diaphragm, chest, shoulders, neck

Flexibility of rib cage determines the size of your breath

“Sipping”

-What an apnea table is and the difference between CO2 and O2 apnea…37:30

Table: series of breath holds

How you can breathe up for

How long you can breathe for

Learn to tolerate low levels of oxygen; CO2 levels rising

Carbon dioxide table: breath up for 2 minutes; hold breath for 2 minutes…

Wonka table

You want higher CO2 levels

Hyperventilating discards CO2 faster than anything

Sit on couch, hold breath

You’ll feel a contraction, start stopwatch; deal with discomfort for 15 seconds

Take one breath

Go to the bathroom before doing this!

Would you do a table while exercising?

No, but you can incorporate breath exercises into your training

Risk of blacking out; do on seated equipment

Book: The Oxygen Advantageby Patrick McKeown

Book: The Power of Your Breathby Anders Olsson

-What kind of breath work one would do in between dives to maintain maximum breath hold time…49:30

Remember diaphragmatic breathing

Only thing you should feel moving is your stomach moving out and in

We’re all chest breathers

Control, be conscious of your breathing vs. not thinking about it

-Why the Valsalva breathing technique is not optimal for free diving…53:22

Pinch and blow: equalize your ears

Can use Valsalva scuba diving

Frenzel technique

Pinch your nose.

Fill your mouth up with a little bit of air.

Close the epiglottis.

Move the soft palate to the neutral position.

Use the tongue like a piston and push air towards the back of your throat.

Valsalva is optimal for scuba diving as you dive head first; air rises

Frenzel is optimal for free diving because you dive head first; opposite of scuba diving

-A demonstration of the Frenzel breathing technique…58:30

-Similarities and differences between Ted’s breathing technique and Wim Hof’s…1:02:45

Hof’s methods are good for cold therapy, not necessarily breath holding

Hyperventilation increases risk for blackout

Drastically lowers CO2 levels

Carbon dioxide levels trigger urge to breathe

Physically reduces amount of oxygen available to your body

Bohr effect:

When we hold our breath, our blood becomes more acidic; changes ph levels

Hyperventilating increases strength of the bond between hemoglobin and oxygen

If strength of bond too high, oxygen molecule can’t be used as fuel

Hyperventilating initially increases ability to hold breath, but there’s the risk of blackout

-Exercise and stretching regimens specific to free divers…1:13:30

Paradox: Free divers train a lot, which leads to high metabolism, which you don’t want as a free diver

There is no set regimen on how to craft the “perfect free diver”

Problem seeking to solve is very complicated

Similar to training cyclists would undergo

Diaphragmatic stretching is critical –

-Some of the courses Ted teaches online…1:26:30

-And Much More…

Resources from this episode:

–Click here to see all of Ted’s courses, including how to equalize, how to take a 20-30% bigger breath, how to freedive safely, and much more!

-Deep: Freediving, Renegade Science, and What the Ocean Tells Us about Ourselves

–The OURA ring – Save $50 with code: GREENFIELDOURA

–The WHOOP wristband

–Spleen volume and blood flow response to repeated breath-hold apneas.

–CO2 and O2 apnea tables

–The Wonka table

-The Oxygen Advantage book by Patrick McKeown

–The Power Of Breath

–My podcast with Laird Hamilton about underwater workouts

–FreeDivingSafety.com

Episode Sponsors:

–Kion: My personal playground for all things having to do with health and wellness. You can get 10% off your entire order when you use discount code: BGF10 at checkout.

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–Thrive Market: Your Favorite Organic Foods and Products. Up to 50% Off. Delivered to Your Door. Get 25% off your first order when you order using my link!

–Harry’s Razors: When you go to harrys.com/Greenfield, you’ll receive a $13 value trial set that has everything you need for the closest shave you can imagine.

Ask Ben a Podcast Question

Source: https://bengreenfieldfitness.com/transcripts/transcript-hold-breath-longer/

[theconspiracyconstruct]

Episode 6: The Moon Landing Hoax

 Click “Keep Reading” for the transcript!

     On July 20th, 1969, Neil Armstrong announced that “The Eagle has landed”, signaling the Apollo 11 mission’s successful lunar landing. The famous words “one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind” was broadcasted to “an estimated 530 million people” as the United States celebrated a victory for their space exploration program (Loff). However, some people think that the moon landing never happened. Instead, they believe these quotes were uttered on television sets, where moon landing footage was faked in order to gain an upper hand over our Cold War enemy, the Soviet Union, during the Space Race. Hey, welcome back. I’m Madi, and on this episode, we’re going to be talking about the moon landing. Let’s get into it.

     As World War II ended, the Cold War began to pick up speed. The Cold War was a battle between the two world powers at the time: The United States and the Soviet Union. Each of the two sides sought to establish their superiority through technological advancements. Outer space was considered the next frontier, thus prompting The Space Race: a battle for dominance within the Cold War that focused on space exploration. It was thought that whoever won The Space Race would win the Cold War (“The Space Race”).

     On October 4th, 1957, the Soviet Union launched Sputnik—the first artificial satellite as well as the first man-made object to be put out into Earth’s orbit. Sputnik, put simply, freaked the United States out. It sparked such a frenzy that the New York Times published an article explaining that, no, Sputnik did not carry nuclear bombs and, no, they were not going to use it to drop said nuclear bombs on the United States (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     Meanwhile, the United States’ program was struggling to even get off the ground (“The Space Race”). Just months before the moon landing, a prototype Lunar Excursion Module (or LEM) was flight tested by Neil Armstrong at the Ellington Air Force Base. During his flight, Armstrong struggled to control the LEM and was forced to eject before it crashed and exploded (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

    Nevertheless, on May 25th, 1961, President John F. Kennedy—whom we spoke about in the last episode—made it a national goal to “perform a crewed lunar landing and return to Earth”. On July 20th, 1969, this goal was realized (Loff).

     Afterward, the first person to really give voice to the theory that the moon landing was faked was Bill Kaysing (Hardwick). Kaysing worked for a company called Rocketdyne until 1963 before publishing a novel titled We Never Went to the Moon: America’s Thirty Billion Dollar Swindle in 1976 (Hardwick; Kaysing). Kaysing is also featured in the 2001 film Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?, which highlights several different pieces of supporting evidence for the moon landing hoax theory (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     The theory is that the United States faked the moon landing to win the Space Race and, therefore, establish their dominance over the Soviet Union in the Cold War. Instead of actually going to the moon, which critics establish we didn’t have the technology to actually pull off, they staged and filmed all the footage (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?). This theory is based off several so-called inconsistencies found in the film footage as well as photos supposedly taken on the moon.

     First, let’s talk about the film footage. If it was faked, where was it filmed? Bill Kaysing believes the moon landing footage was filmed in a top-secret military base known as Area 51. Area 51 is one of the most heavily guarded facilities in the United States; however, Russian spy satellites were able to capture bird’s eye view photos of the base. What do these photos show? A series of hangers resembling movie sound stages, as well as barren moon-like areas covered in craters (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?). Yup, kind of suspicious.

     One of the inconsistencies that aid this theory is the American flag that the astronauts plant on the moon. It appears to be waving in the wind, yet there’s not any air nor wind on the moon. As Apollo 11 lands on the moon, there’s a lack of engine noise in the film. Critics argue that the engine is far too powerful to not hear it at all in the film. Once it lands, the film shows that there’s no blast crater under the Lunar Excursion Model, which critics claim there should be. Even NASA’s scientific illustrations depict a blast crater, meaning they were expecting there to be one. While the astronauts wander around the moon, they look as if they’re experiencing the moon’s gravity. However, when the footage is sped up, it looks like they’re just running normally on the Earth’s gravity. When the LEM departs, there’s also no exhaust plume, and conspirators claim that the ascent stage pops up as if it “were jerked up by a cable” on a film set (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?). 

     Now, the photos. The photos were captured by cameras mounted onto the astronauts’ chests. Obviously, there’s only one light source on the moon—the sun—and there was also no flash on their chest-mounted cameras. However, multiple photos reveal shadows pointing in multiple directions, which lends evidence to there being multiple light sources. Another inconsistency in the photos is that many photos show figures standing in shadows. If there were to be only one light source, critics claim that if they’re standing in dark shadows that means they should be shrouded by the darkness of the shadow. But they’re completely visible and appear to be lit up. Jan Lundberg himself, the man who designed the astronaut’s chest-mounted cameras, admits that figures appear to be “standing in a spotlight” in photos where they shouldn’t even be visible at all due to backlighting. Additionally, there were crosshairs etched into the camera lenses. But, in many photos, the crosshairs appear behind objects in the foreground—such as the flag, the lunar rover, equipment, or an astronaut. Conspirators claim this is proof of technical manipulation because this wouldn’t occur otherwise (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     Now, I know what you’re thinking: NASA is a huge department, how could all those people possibly keep that big of a secret? Or, maybe you weren’t thinking that. But I’m going to tell you the answer anyway. Investigative journalist Bart Sibrel asserts that not everyone knew. The individual employees themselves didn’t know the full picture. Only a few people at the top of the hierarchy were in on the secret. Nevertheless, conspirators claim that even out of this handful of people, some were unable to keep the secret and dealt with accordingly (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     Virgil Gus Grissom was one of the first seven astronauts and, at the time, it seemed like he may likely be the first man on the moon. However, he was also openly a critic of the space program, having been quoted as saying “Someone’s going to get killed”. On January 27th, 1967, Grissom and his crew boarded the Apollo 1 capsule for what was supposed to be a routine simulation. They quickly began to encounter issues. First, the communications systems failed. Then, the capsule burst into flames with the crew still inside of it. Unfortunately, none of them survived. Grissom’s family believes that the fire was no accident. To this day, the cause of the fire is unknown, and the Apollo 1 capsule remains locked away at a military base (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     After the fire, Thomas Ronald Baron—the safety inspector during Apollo 1 construction—testified before Congress. He asserted the Apollo program was such a mess that the United States would never make it to the moon. Baron had a 500-page report on his findings. However, one week after his testimony, his car was struck by a train. Baron, his wife, and his stepdaughter were killed, and Baron’s incriminating report mysteriously disappeared—never to be seen again (Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon?).

     Now, I’m a big conspiracy theory enthusiast. Obviously, or I wouldn’t have made a podcast dedicated to them. However, the moon landing theory is one that’s hard for me to get behind. A lot of the so-called evidence is refutable. And it seems like I’m not alone. It was difficult for me to find any sources that full-heartedly backed the theory. In fact, most of the sources I could find criticized those who did. Author C Stuart Hardwick writes in his article for Forbes that Bill Kaysing “was obviously unqualified to express the opinions he was expressing” and that “pretending expertise to a bunch of ignorant sycophants [fueled] his ego” (Hardwick). Ouch.

     I wouldn’t go as far as to say that, but I certainly have my reservations on this one. However, as I prefaced in the first episode, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with at least exploring this theory and considering the fact that we are not always told the whole story.  

     That’s all for this episode! Stay tuned for next time, where we’ll be delving into possibly one of the biggest conspiracy theories of all times: Flat Earth. You’ll be able to find that episode, along with all the others, on theconspiracyconstruct.tumblr.com. Bye!

Works Cited

Hardwick, C Stuart. “Where Did The Moon Landing Conspiracy Theory Originally Come From?” Forbes, Forbes Magazine, 28 June 2018, www.forbes.com/sites/quora/2018/06/28/where-did-the-moon-landing-conspiracy-theory-originally-come-from/.

John, Moffet, director. Conspiracy Theory: Did We Land on the Moon? Netflix.

Kaysing, Bill. We Never Went to the Moon: America's Thirty Billion Dollar Swindle. CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, 1976.

Loff, Sarah. “Apollo 11 Mission Overview.” NASA, NASA, 17 Apr. 2015, www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/apollo/missions/apollo11.html.

“The Space Race.” History.com, A&E Television Networks, 22 Feb. 2010, www.history.com/topics/cold-war/space-race.

[cdc1345711]

Prime Order VS Lexington The Evil Beard

(Starla Cosmas AKA Dream Maker of the Prime Order had just gotten out of School with her friends-planning their weekend)

Devon:So are we gonna hangout at(looks around his surroundings)’you know where?’(then winks)”

Starla:Devon you can say the Prime Order base”

Devon:SHHH-you don’t want people to find out your secret identity that’s super hero 101″

Trevor:Dev she’s not a super hero she........uh what is it the PO does again Star?”

Starla:Silly-we make sure order is kept in place in every Cartoon Universe”

Tamyra:But what about that uh......Coal-Burn guy?”

Starla:Uncle Charles hasn’t been doing much disorderly conducts in a while.......kinda getting worried,but I’m he’ll turn up,he always does”

Darrel:Honestly I think this guy sounds cool-he made a team of famous and not so famous Cartoon Characters and they go on Avengers and Justice League level missions,bet it’s awesome”

Starla:(Serious for a second)It might be cool but Order needs to be maintained-therefore his team needs to disband(Everyone looks at her then she turns happy again)but until then I’ll enjoy their company(then skips off)”

Rachel:.....am I the only who thinks it’s scary but also cute when she acts all serious?”

Trevor:(Smiles at Starla)Not at all....”

(Starla transforms-via Sailor Moon or Miraculous Ladybug and Cat Noir style-and asks Maze to open up a portal to the base)

Maze:So Dreamy-brought your little crew with you I see?”

Dream Maker:I sure did”

Tamyra:I can’t believe it still amazes me how cool your portals feel Maze”

Maze:Thanks girl”

(Void,Zella and Accel enter)

Void:Oh Dream Maker brought her friends with her.......how nice”

Rachel:Awe(Walks up and hugs Void)Nice to see you too kitty cat”

Void:GAH-LET ME GO OR I’LL  BLACK HOLE YOU IN MY MOUTH A SPIT YOU OUT!!!!”

Rachel:(Still Hugging Void)Sure Kitty”

Accel:Ha-I love it when these kids hangout here”

Zella:It is nice to hang with different people-oh hey Devon,found something you might want to see(holds up a comic)”

Devon:(Eye brighten)No way-the first appearance of Wolverine in Hulk Issue #181-so awesome,how did you.......”

Zella:Before the order I used to be a Comic Geek,any kind of story with scientists got me hooked”

Trevor:So......where’s the rest of this Motley Crew?”

Accel:Set Zero is Meditating,Repulse is napping,and Sleep Master is discussing Charles’ suddenly quiet activities,thinks he’s planning something big or some crap”

Tamyra:Don’t you guys ever call yourselves by your names?”

(The PO just look at them in confusion)

Trevor:Do you guys know each other’s real names?”

Void:Well who we are isn’t important-maintaining order that’s important”

Rachel:Sounds........kinda sad”

Accel:This life ain’t perfect but it’s for a worthy cause”

(Suddenly the alarms go off)

BWEEP BWEEP BWEEP BWEEP

Repulse:(Wakes up from his nap)Huh what.......OH HELL YEAH MISSION TIME...”

Devon:Sweet-can......can we watch?”

Dream Maker:Well........we gotta ask Grandpa”

Sleep Master:(In an almost emotionless tone)No......”

Devon:What?? but Mr.Seriphos......”

SM:Out of the question Devon”

Marlon:C’mon Sleeps-let the kids watch you guys take name and kick ass,should be a real treat”

SM:And whose to watch them if you’ll accompany us?”

Marlon:They’re trustworthy and mature enough not to touch my controls”

SM:(Face palms himself)Fine-but be sure not to touch anything on the console”

Kids:Yes sir”

Trevor:Hey Star(DM looks at Trevor)go kick some butt”

DM:(Smiling)I will”

Repulse:So what’s the mission-EVIL attack or has Charles resurfaced again?”

SM:A whole Cartoon World was obliterated-the ‘Garfield and Friends’ world”

DM:Awe-those poor animals”

Set Zero:So we go in and I use my Zero powers to fix everything?”

Marlon:Pre-(feels something)cisely”

Void:Kinda paused their for a second Marlon”

Marlon:Just.....wondering what to have for dinner”

Void:Okay”

(They head to the now dead wastelands of the once live Cartoon World-but before it could be healed A large cloaked figure appears)

SM:Coburn?.......did you do this?”

Cloaked Figure:I am not Charles Coburn-I am a being much more powerful and to answer yes I decimated this land to get your attention just to say ‘stay out of my way’”

SM:Apparently you don’t know us very well-Dream Maker knock him out”

DM:Alrighty Granndpa(tries to use her powers but for some reason...)I.....I can’t use them?”

SM:Hmm-well that’s a problem,Maze”

Maze:My warping ability ain’t working either”

Set Zero:If he ain’t Coburn than how is he able to negate our powers?”

SM:Good Question-we should incapacitate him and find out-Accel try to accelerate his vectors,that might slow him down a bit,why you Repulse try to demobilize him by cutting his legs”

Accel:Got it(accelerates to the cloaked figure)”

Repulse:On it(cuts himself in the legs but transfers the injury to the figure-but it has no affect)what the Hell my powers too?”

Accel:Time to mess up your vec......”

Cloaked Figure:Insolent pest(uses some kind of aura to lift Accel and fling him to right on top of Repulse)”

(At the base Trevor,Darrel,Devon,Rachel and Tamyra watch as the rime Order is getting their hides handed to them)

Darrel:This isn’t looking very good”

Devon:They might find a way to turn it around....maybe”

Rachel:Yeah-it’s like an episode of Dragonball Super-the enemy beats them but later they unlock a special ability to help win the fight-they’ll be fine(she says in a worried tone)”

Trevor:Please be okay Star”

(Back to the fight)

Set Zero:I could try to use my Zero powers but I don’t know if he took them away”

SM:Stand back-I’ll handle this(brings out his staff)been to long since I used my Staff”

Cloaked Figure:The Staff.......GIVE IT TO ME!!!!”

SM:(Blasts him with pinkish-blueish bolts of lightning at the cloaked figure)This stone was given to me by my father the same way his father gave it to him,and i’ll be damned if i’d give it to the likes of you........(the bolts cinches the cloaked figures cloak off)no matter what........Uh”

(The cloaked figure-now without his cloak is now revealed to be.....)

Set Zero:A Beard??”

Marlon:(Scared)Not just any Beard that’s.......”

SM:Lexington(a cold chill ran down his spine)”

Lexington:The Beard of Power-and you Seriphos Cosmas wield in that staff the ‘Dream Gem’ one of 7 Universal Gems-I have the ‘Power’ and ‘Devastation’ Gems,along with my God-like powers”

SM:(Though scared and knowingly realizing he’s out-powered stands his ground)I swore on my Father to protect this staff-especially from an Exiled Beard Lord like you”

Lexington:FOOL......(Launches his attack at Sleep Master but of instead of him the attack hits.....)”

SM:REPULSE!!!?”

Repulse:(Saving SM from the blast while he himself takes full affect of the Beard’s powers)I can handle this boss.........I can redirect the pain......I will survive”

Lexington:ENOUGH........you have angered me for the last time-NOW YOU DIE MORTAL!!!!!!”

Repulse:(Feeling the overpowered weight of the attack messing up his body)Huh.........so this is what it feels like........to die”

(In that mere second all the power of Lexington’s force attack explodes on Repulse,clearing him of his skin,leaving only........a skeleton-as his team mates look on at him)

Maze:REP!!!!!!.........”

Set Zero:I can use my power to help bring.....huh? AAAAAAAAAAAGH(just than a small portal opens up under his feet flinging him inside to who knows where)”

Void:SET ZERO!!!!!!!”

Lexington:I have sent the one you dubbed Set Zero into another domain to show I am not completely heartless-I will return for your staff Seriphos Cosmas but for now........I’ll let you mourn your fallen(Lexington than flies off)”

Maze:(Crying and holding the skull of Repulse)Rep......Oh God”

DM:(Also saddened by the loss of Repulse and Set Zero cries and hugs her Grandfather)Oh No”

SM:It’s okay young one.....we shall fix this-I swear”

Accel:If only I was faster I could’ve.....”

Zella:(Placing a hand on his shoulder)Acs-it’s not your fault”

Void:(Sees Marlon on the ground)Marlon,what’s.......”

Marlon:My fault.........Repulse.......Set Zero.....(turns to show Void,his crying eyes)I SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT COMING!!!!(hugs Void)I should’ve seen it coming”

Void:(Hugs him back)We all should’ve seen it coming”

(They return to the base-DM’s friends saw the whole thing and try to comfort them)

Trevor:Hey we saw the whole thing we’re sorry”

SM:Losing both Set Zero and Repulse was......an unfortunate event”

Maze:(Angry)Don’t expect any sympathy from him-this fucker didn’t shed a tear when his own son died,which is why his other son is a fucking mentally depressed sociopath”

DM:Maze.......”

Maze:Not now Dreamy........just not now”

Devon:(To the others)We really are sorry”

Accel:Hey-like I said,it sucks but it’s for a greater good”

Trevor:How are you doing Star?(she already answered by giving Trevor a hug,causing him to fluster)”

DM:I do miss Repulse but Set Zero is still alive and we’ll find him,I’m not as strong with my emotions as Grandpa is haha(wiping away her tears)”

Trevor:Doesn’t look that way heh”

(As DM and her friends retreat to her room as well as the others retreat to their rooms-Marlon however walks into a different area of the base and contacts someone)

Marlon:You were right it was Lexington gathering the Universal Gems-so far we still got the Dream Gem but Lex still has the Power and Destruction”

????:That’s very bad......do the others.......?”

Marlon:Faked guilt act worked,even did fake tears,sad we had to lose a few numbers to win but it is for a greater good,still don’t know where the other gems are but i’ll keep you updated.......just hope the others don’t find out Charles”

Charles:If they do-we will need their help,now go comfort them,especially Maze and Void-they need it most of all”

Marlon:Will do(cuts transmission)”

Charles:Eric-how far are we in finding the Soul,Time,Death and Life Gems”

Eric:Grim has the Death Gem with him,Soul Gem is still no where to be found as well as the Time Gem,but we still have the Life Gem in San Lorenzo”

Charles:Good-we need to find them before Lexington does.........or else we’re all fucked”

(The Cartoon-Force keeps searching for the Universe Gems so they could save the world from Lexington’s wrath-while the PO go back to business as usual)

THE END

Prime Order belongs to @randomwoohoo 

[anovel70]

My idea for a Season 5 Kim Possible

Episode 1: Goodbye Ron It’s summer. Ron hasn’t gotten accepted into any college, Kim can’t decide which college to go to. Yori appears and tells Ron that Master Sensei wants Ron to train as a ninja, and is the only path for him. He says goodbye to Kim. Wade gives Kim an improved battlesuit in person. He appears to want to say more, but they receive a call from Lucre, who wants to challenge her. Electronique reaches out to Frugal Lucre because she knows that Lucre has good technology skills. They try to get Drakken and Shego to join them. Drakken now wants to be called Drew Lipsky. Drew quit evil and is going to retire, but Frugal Lucre insists. Drew gives Lucre his laboratory, but this is not enough for them. Electronique tortures Drew to join and demands to know where Shego is. Electronique uses the Attitudinator to give Drew’s evil to Lucre. Kim comes in to save Drew. Frugal Lucre captures Kim and Drew and puts them in electrical chairs. Shego comes in to save Drew and Kim from Lucre because she left a box in his lair when she moved out. Kim’s battlesuit is also malfunctioning again from the electrical chairs.

Frugal Lucre turns blue and Drew turns white. Shego reveals she wants to do more evil, and if Drakken can’t give it to her, then she’ll find evil elsewhere.

At the end of the episode, the Great Blue is seen spying on Kim, happy that Kim and Ron are no longer a team.

Episode 2: Goodbye Wade Kim’s mother is talking to Kim about which college she wants to go to, and suggests Upperton University, where she went. Wade gets a job as Oren Door’s assistant, the software czar. He is leaving Jim and Tim in charge of Team Possible’s operations. Kim has to learn to accept to work with the Tweebs. Wade needs to realize his full potential, and Kim must accept this. Trouble finds Kim right away, as Lucre tries to sell Dr. Drakken’s mind control shampoo at Upperton University. This time, he has changed the label to Lucre’s Lotion, and he’s marketing to college students.

Kim saves the day, and Professor Professor welcomes Kim into the University and gives her an offer she can’t resist.

At the end of the episode, the Great Blue reveals that he was the one to send Wade away to break up the team.

Episode 3: Digging Up the Temple She wants to study neuroscience. Monique gives Kim new mission clothes and casual outfit. Monique reveals she is headed for New York City to study fashion. Kim realizes that all of her friends have moved on: Ron, Wade, and Monique. Yori tells Ron that DNAmy, Fukushima, and Bates plans on reviving Monkey Fist. While their intentions are good, they cannot risk awakening Yono again. Bates and DNAmy’s cuddle buddies are digging. Ron is having trouble tapping into his Mystical Monkey Powers to fight off the cuddle buddies. They trap Ron and Yori. They hit the top of the temple and Yono appears. However, Yono doesn’t want to revive Monkey Fist and needs more time to gather his strength before fighting again. He reveals that he has plans to destroy the world one day.

Ron decides to go back to Middleton and attend Upperton University with Kim to study math to become an actuary, like his father.

The Great Blue looks is upset that Kim and Ron reunion, but takes note of the Yono character.

Episode 4: The Mathematical Dimension Ron’s professor is Mather, who recognizes Ron and vows for revenge. To make matters worse, Gil is in Ron’s class. Kim finds out that neuroscience is all full, which means she has to study Child Development. In Kim’s college writing class, she finds out Bonnie is in her class. Ron opens his textbook and realizes he needs to study a lot. He tries to convince Kim to get zapped by the smart machine, but Kim disapproves and tutors him again.

Kim discovers that the Mather has the Pan-Dimensional Vortex Inducer and comes to Ron’s class to warn him about it. The Mather locks the door and sucks the class into mathematical abstraction using his calculator. Ron must use his math knowledge to destroy Mather into abstraction. The class escapes the calculator.

Kim gives Hego the calculator and tells her that the Mather is inside. Shego is there and reveals she has moved into the Team Go Tower because she has no where else to go. She is seen wearing her new outfit, and remarks how she can beat Kim in style and in fighting, and they have a fight.

This is Kim and Shego's first fight this season. A new battle music is created, representing Shego's old battle theme and incorporating new elements that make it more ominous sounding.

Episode 5: Merging Bodies Shego is working for DNAmy. DNAmy accidently combines Kim and Shego into one person. Ron and Rufus are also merged. They fight Gil, who can now morph into a mutant at will.

Kim and Shego can read each other’s thoughts. They looked into cheerleading, child development, and dealing with annoying brothers. Kim tries to enter Shego’s fears while Shego is sleeping, but Shego wakes and tells Kim that she is aware that Kim is trying to read her thoughts. One strong scene was they share was at the end of So the Drama. Kim felt the pain Shego went through and she starts to cry seeing Shego like that. It never occurred to Kim that she would actually kill Shego. Shego realizes that Kim is reading her thoughts and stops her. Kim also realizes that Shego was trying to destroy Hank’s cupcake factory in Odds Man In because she thought it was a stupid idea. Shego looks through all the times Kim has exploded a villain’s lair and left them there to die.

Once everyone is unmerged, Shego says, “Kim, being merged with you made me realize that there is more bad in you than you know. Kim replies, “Shego, thanks for your lessons and life experiences. I like the last thing you said: there’s more good in you than you know.” Shego appears surprised and says, “Until next time, Kimmie”

At the end, the Great Blue agrees with Shego that Kim is more bad than she thinks.

Instead of being expelled, Miss Guide is hired to watch Gil to make sure he does not cause any trouble. Shego quits working for DNAmy, who now has a no merging clause in addition to the no cloning clause.

Episode 6: Ron is trying to find his athletic replacement for football. A major robbery at the X games takes place. Vinnie Wheeler calls Kim for help. The top three suspects are Senor Senior Senior, Adrena Lynn, and Motor Ed. Kim interrogates the three suspects. She realizes that she'll have to compete against the three in order to get useful information. Motor Ed hits on Adrena. At the end of the competition, Vinnie accuses Senor and has him captured to watch the final round of the X games, featuring Kim and Adrena.

It turns out Adrena robbed everyone, and tries to get away. Senior stops her because he is mad at her, but ends up near dead in the chase. Motor Ed chases after her. It turns out Vinnie and Adrena faked the whole sitch to endanger Kim. Vinnie Wheeler ends up arrested and his companies all go bankrupt. Nana Possible is getting sick too.

Episode 7: Dying Wish Junior is upset that his father is dead and has a funeral. Bonnie is sad as well. His father left a will with (the bad guy that stole all their money) Junior follows his father’s will and is now striving to be a pop star.

Nana Possible says her last words to the Possibles and she dies. Her last words are, “Remember Kimmie, anything is possible for a Possible.”

The rest of the episode focuses on the characters’ reactions to these deaths.

Shego helps Junior kidnap Paula Pandouty, who is forced to interview Junior and get him some recognition. Kim fights Shego, and learns that Senior is dead, and tells them that Nana is dead as well. Shego remembers mind controlling Nana and now feels bad. Shego comes over to Kim’s newly built house (it was destroyed in Graduation) and tells Kim she made lemon squares for her.

Episode 8: Island Auction Every evil villain has their eyes on Senior’s island, which is now abandoned. Jack Hench and Hank Perkins offers it to the highest bidder, meeting on the island. Every villain is stealing something valuable that has been mentioned in the show before, wearing Kim out. Shego is the one getting these items with the promise of getting paid. When Gemini orders the capture of Ron Stoppable, Kim is dragged into the auction. Jack captures Kim and it looks like Kim is about to die. Team Go ends up saving her, but Shego denies she had anything to do with it.

Duff Killigan – Centurion Project Professor Dementor – Counter Electrodynamic Concentrator from Bonding Lucre and Electronique – the improved Attitudinator “why would I want something I created?” DNAmy – Geome thing, Monkey Amulet Adrena Lynn – her dialog uses the word “freaky” and “what will she do next?” too much Motor Ed –  Turbonic Charger Valve (it’s actually a fake) “What do you mean you want me to open it? seriously!” Jack: “You didn’t get Shego to steal this for you, did you.” Motor Ed: “The babe didn’t want to help me. I was against the odds, seriously!” Summer Gail – weather machine Gemini – Kinetic Modulator from Bonding Embarrassment Ninjas – a variety of prank items

The Great Blue can be seen at the end of the episode. “Kim Possible defeats all the villains in one small place. She is a remarkable foe. I will be the first to defeat her once and for all.”

Episode 9: Camille Leon wants to buy the most expensive diamond in the world (from Ron Millionaire) to prove that she is still a respectable celebrity. Camille Leon and the Fashionistas tries to rob the five richest people in the world: Papa Porter, Oren Door, Paula Pandouty, Martin Smarty, Falsetto Jones (since Senior’s death).

Episode 10a: Fashion is being stolen from many places. All roads lead to the Middleton Sewers, where Big Daddy Brotherson is seen. Kim asks Big Daddy Brotherson who is doing it. She bribes him with tickets to UU’s concert (starring Junior). Shego and Camille face off in a fashion show, which they stole.

Episode 10b: The Rich Ron Ned (who’s now working at Bueno Nacho in Upperton) gives Ron another paycheck for his Naco royalty. This time, it’s considerably less. Ron uses it wisely this time and spends it on the next four years of college for himself and Kim, and puts some money away in the bank.

Duff Killigan golfs on the Prince of Rodeghan’s property. Ron pays Duff and the Knights of Rodeghan to leave the prince alone after Kim, Killigan, and the knights fight. Duff Killigan, with his new money, hires the Knights of Rodeghan as his new henchmen and invites them to live on his island.

Episode 11: Retiring Drakken Drakken is at an evil retirement center, where retired villains go. Aviarius is also there and talks to Drakken. Drakken is bored of being roommates with Aviarius so he calls Shego. Shego won’t pick up Drakken’s phone. Drakken has nowhere to go. Frugal Lucre comes in and convinces him to be evil again. He proposes a plan to Drakken. Drakken sees that his plan is a good plan, but cannot allow Lucre to be victorious at something he failed at doing. Drakken stops Frugal Lucre. Kim and Ron arrives and finds Drakken already defeated Lucre. They take Drakken home. Drakken ends up working with Bob Chen, his old college friend.

The great blue sees the ending of this episode.

Episode 12: The Proposal Drakken reveals he wants to propose to Shego to Kim and Ron. He misses her greatly. However, Shego is still bad and Drakken is good. Kim recalls being trapped in Shego’s body and knows that Shego wants to be with Drakken too. However, she promised Shego not to tell anyone about anything Kim may have seen.

Shego is seen with Camille Leon and the Fashionistas stealing clothes. It turns out they became good friends. Kim and Shego fight. Drakken and Shego are engaged at the end of the episode. Commodore Puddles is holding the ring, and this time, he is blue, since Commodore Puddles changes color every episode.

Episode 13: Morphing Lucre Lucre kidnaps Camille and forces her to reveal where she got her morphing powers from. Lucre steals this but keeps Camille captive. The Fashionistas call Kim for help. They visit Dr. Beaufox, who comes up with an antiserum. Lucre loses his morphing powers, but Camille gets away before she is treated with the antiserum. The Fashionistas helped her get away.

The Great Blue is revealed to have morphing powers as well, and claims that he could morph into Lucre to his advantage.

Episode 14a: Super Suit Battle Professor Dementor has the Centurion Project and battles Kim with her supersuit.

Episode 14b: Ron’s parents hires Nanny Maim for Hana. Nanny Maim wants to get revenge on Kim and Ron by turning them into babies. The twins get turned into babies instead

Episode 15: Global Justice vs WWEE Kim is learning about the Cold War in class. She gets summoned to Global Justice to learn that Gemini is launching his next world domination plan.

Gemini is going through applicants to be Agent Alpha, such as Falsetto Jones, Aviarius, and Brick Flagg. He eventually settles on Jackie, who can turn into a jackal. Gemini has Dr. Fen, Chester Yapsby, and Hank Perkins working for him to create Giant Robotic Cockroaches at a good cost.

Pepe and Rufus fight. Professor Acari, Vivian, and James Possible creates a giant magnet in outer space to get rid of the cockroaches, but that doesn’t work. Dr. Fen’s robotic design flaws eventually backfired as Jim and Tim are able to spot something obvious that can easily defeat the robots.

The Great Blue comments on how Kim was able to save the world from WWEE, so he needs to be stronger. He appears to go back to Lorwardia.

Episode 16: Thanksgiving Kim and Ron are stressing over fall semester finals through Thanksgiving. Justine Flanner and Vivian contact Kim and tell her that the Kinematic Continuum disrupter has been stolen, and that the dragon from Partners may be released. It turns out Gemini stole it. Kim with her battle suit must fight the dragon.

Episode 17 and 18: The Blue Wedding Kim gets a call from Agent Smith from Area 51. Electronique is turned into pure electricity to help Lucre, destroying her in the process, the Bebe robots are now super charged. Lucre reveals himself to be the Great Blue who shapeshifted into Lucre. It turns out that Lucre was captured by the Great Blue. The Bebe robots attack the world.

Professor Acari and Chester Yapsby suggest using the cockroaches to help battle the Bebe robots. Drakken uses his Destructobots, but they end up destroyed. Felix’s wheelchair joins the battle.

In the next phase, the Diablo toys are brought back. Drakken comes up with the antisignal to combat the Great Blue.

When all the Bebes are destroyed, the Great Blue reveals he has the Electron Magneto Accelerator from Emotion Sickness. He may have lost today, but he’ll be back. Shego endorses Kim, saying, “She’s Kim Possible. Anything is possible for Kim Possible.”

Drakken and Shego get married at the end, where it starts to snow (Summer Gail's weather machine may be involved). Lucre turns white again and works for Oren Door and Wade to improve cyber security. Professor Dementor tells Drakken that he has stolen the Pan Dimensional Vortex Inducer again because it needs to be kept away from the Electron Magneto Accelerator, which Cyrus Bortel claims he has lost. Dementor also asks why Drakken's skin is white, and before Drakken can answer, the credits roll.