#I resent not being able to tolerate high stress environments

[oglegoggle]

I feel so paralyzed

[fourfucksake]

online meeting

pairing: chris evans x black!fem!reader

warnings: cursing, stripping, masturbation

word count: 4.2k

p.s this workpiece is set in an alternative reality. this is a professor!chris one shot + i imagined y/n as a black girl, but i hope every single one of you lovely people will read!

Heaps of new policies bombarded universities since the spread of the virus. The amount of preparation and paperwork that had to be completed due to the newest conditions in the teaching system made everyone stressed to the maximum level. Perhaps, that’s why teachers communicated more during those challenging times; only those who work in the same environment can relate to your work frustrations. Individuals whom before appeared almost invisible where now your online buddies. It was quite incredible though.

Chris enjoyed the feeling of this community being available for him whenever he feels like expressing his irritations and or simply desires to moan about his dislikes. Before, he has never considered himself to be a whiner, but since everyone has been constantly moaning and pouting, he thought this is the right time to join the club.

Taking into consideration the current state of the world he was assured that everyone is a complainer right about now. He was okay with that though. No doubt, he didn’t know much about psychology, however, it seemed only logical to allow people to talk about how they feel. Also, it appeared plausible people felt scared, confused, or worried. Hey, these were very surreal times. There was no reason to make others feel bad about having emotions.

Of course, there was some resentment towards certain members of University since all the teaching went online. Sometimes, Chris felt like most of his colleagues gave rats ass about regulations and procedures that were now put in place. Instead of trying to provide the best learning experience possible, they restricted themselves to slamming all the work materials online for students to figure everything out on their own.

Personally, he found online teaching unbearable and exhausting. He hated it; there were no words to describe how much he despised it. At first it was alright; it was tolerable and doable. In a way, it was nice. Being at home, able to wake up later than early morning hours. Being with his dog and going on long walks wherever he wished. Being able to take his time with cooking, exercising, reading. All of those mentioned were exceedingly pleasant.

However, Chris chose to be a teacher. He loved spreading his knowledge around. Since an early age he would teach his younger brother; he was much help when it came to revising, essay or exam tips. This was his passion, he loved it. This pandemic undeniably took this away from him. However, there was still room to provide students with knowledge this way, and he tried extremely hard to do so in most effective ways.

For example, he did not have to orchestrate his own online meetings to be this long. Half an hour, that was a long time slot. This was planned completely on purpose. Ultimately, his desire was to provide students with the time to talk to him, express their concerns, and ask questions. Maybe he took this job way too seriously, he thought, and it wasn't needed. However, there’s always this teacher everyone likes, and Chris wanted to be precisely that guy. It wasn't some stupid ego thing, not at all. He genuinely wanted people to feel like he is there for them and wants them to succeed. Every single individual had an ability to be successful, some just needed an extra push too keep them on track. Although his own schooling experiences where genuinely pleasant, he knew he would benefit more from University experience if he had a teacher like him. Not to lick his own ass, he thought, of course.

After years of working in the schooling system no errors have ever occurred. Until last year, when the last class prior to pandemic began their college journey. Back then and there a problem has arisen – you. It was no one else than little Miss Perfect, the girl who made him look twice when she entered the room. Oh, how tiring and fatiguing crushing on you really was. Chris was always collected and focused while working, but with you in his classes he found himself distracted. Often losing his train of thought, his mind shifted to dark places when your class sat in front of him. Chris was a perfectionist, so this was, in fact, greatly infuriating for him.

He did not feel this way since high school. Back in the day he was not the coolest kid you could walk past in the corridor. Thankfully, he has never had his head shoved in the toilet, but not being bullied did not necessarily mean there’s a successful high school experience behind an average American. In his own opinion, he was just a normal kid that had nothing to show for back then.

Precisely that, being average, was now the reason behind this familiar feeling. A pretty girl, a popular girl causing vivid emotions to flush down himself. Looking at her while she does the most ordinary things was the reason behind the uncomfortable state in his pants. His hormones went ill around her, reminding him of how tough being a teenage boy with no control over his erections was. It felt so familiar, craving her this badly, almost as if he’s done it before. Maybe, in a way, he compared you to someone he crushed on for the whole duration of high school. A beautiful skin complexion, addictive smile and those big, shiny eyes staring at his soul; those qualities of yours highly reminded him of her.

Chris remembered that girl very well. He recalled being fascinated by her presence, by her strong personality, and hypnotic prettiness. Her name did not pop up in his mind for years. Until he met you. Chris had Pearl, Pearl Bennett, tattooed on his brain back then. Needless to say, it was embarrassing how annoyingly beautiful she was. Just like you. Now, he didn’t even know if she was alive, he hasn’t seen her for years. It never really bugged him then, it didn’t bug him now. It was just a pleasant memory that he was able to recollect because of you.

He wasn’t sure about your feelings towards him. Mr. Novak, his colleague, often commented on the way some students would look at him. Chris regularly heard Novak claiming that Evans could get any of “that young pussy” if he only snapped his fingers. Whether it was true or not, he had no idea. Maybe, he was just humble. Or stupid, possibly very stupid.  

The house was practically unoccupied now; his wife was dropping groceries off at her mum’s house and Dodger was nowhere to be found, most likely sleeping someplace in the house. Chris did not mind. In fact, he was relieved to have no other human being here. Since pandemic began his marriage decreased in its quality drastically. For quite some time existing relationship brought more annoyance than joy. He was not sure if it went both ways but noticing how regularly his wife exited their house in recent times it was healthy to assume the feeling was mutual.

How did he feel about his failed marriage? Weirdly, he was awfully okay with it. There was not a single part of him that cared enough to fight for this marriage any longer. Right now, all his thoughts were concentrated around another female. How she managed to look delicious without trying. How she smiled or laughed. How her faced twisted with grumpy expressions once she didn’t understand a certain concept of a lecture. Chris could go on, and on, and on.

It was not possible he could describe you in any other word than perfect. It was quite pathetic, he thought, it shouldn't be like that. Yes, you are a pretty girl and yes, no man can probably say no to you. There was just something about you, something so extraordinary that it took his breath away. What was this fascination? He wasn't sure. However, what he was positive about was that he enjoys looking at you. He enjoys listening to you. He enjoys thinking about you. He enjoys all those things way too much; he was aware of that. He was not ready to stop thinking about you just yet.

Now, sitting in front of his Mac, his eyes were focused on the screen. He wasn’t too up to date when it came to the modern technology, but he also wasn’t clueless to how to work a computer. Setting everything up, he glanced over at the previously printed list of names with time slots besides them. The list was not in alphabetical order, students had their half an hour available for the next eight hours of his life.

It would be a lie to say he was not thinking about you. He was looking forward to seeing your face, even if it’s only on the computer display. Your surname and student ID were somewhere halfway through the list. Naturally, he searched for your name straight away after the programme generated the list.

The ticking of the clock hanged on the nearby wall sounded out so clearly. Almost like a racing heart whenever one feels more strain than usual. He could feel the nervousness growing within him as the time passed. He almost felt bad for the kid who had his scheduled meeting right before you. Chris kept on stuttering, disconnecting, and asking for questions to be repeated. Unfortunately, there was no strength in him to think about the failed one-to-one since his brain was too concentrated on you. His favourite, little student.

His thought process was disrupted as a green dot appeared next to your surname, suggesting your online availability. Licking his lips and fixing his hair, his fingers position themselves on the mouse. One click and the signal began. Beep one, beep two, beep three.

“Hi, Mr. Evans!” Her bubbly voice caused Chris to smile. She waved and in response so did he. She seemed happy, her face expression indicated nothing but joy, he enjoyed it greatly. “Hi! How are you? How’s everything?” He asked with an honest curiosity, still smiling at his student. It’s been months since the last time they spoke without anyone else around. Of course, this was the first instance of them conversating in those settings, but he did not mind. Any type of physical interaction seemed impossible now and anytime soon. This was the best he could receive for a significant period for now.

Their faces didn’t shut for the first couple of minutes. Talking about the past months, Chris was quickly reminded of how smart and funny this girl infatuating really is. They seemed to be getting on well right from the first meeting. Weirdly, she had similar likes and dislikes as well as sense of humour. It was like talking to a long-term friend whom you haven’t seen in the longest time. He noticed her hair change, spotting the long knotless braids; in his opinion she looked completely stunning in this hairstyle. He was quick to comment on it and as a reply he was given a complement on his newest buzzcut.

Sadly, but still, he ended the chit chat to focus on discussing work material. Chris tried to stay on topic and somehow it was going well. For the next couple of minutes, he chatted about work. His hand travelled to the left side of his desk to glance at a list of things he wanted to mention, however, he got cut off by the voice emanating from the screen.

“Are those meetings being recorded, Mr. Evans?” She raised her eyebrows with interest spread across her face. Her back bent forward, causing her face to enlarge on his screen. “I mean like,” She continued and coughed. “Is anyone going to watch this later? Does anyone have access to this after we finish talking?” Her question expanded or rather multiplied, sounding out in Chris’ air pads. There was no denying he was conflicted about why she was asking this question. This was not his first online meeting and not a single individual showed any concern in this matter.

“Well, no, not really. If any of us wanted to report our meeting for any reason then I guess, um, I guess it is possible to reopen the video chat,” Slow nod was all he could do at this very moment. No doubt, he still was not able to understand the nature of her question. “If any of us found the other person’s behaviour concerning, rude or inappropriate then the IT services could recover this video chat.” He added in a robotic tone almost as if he were reading from the script.

“Would you want this meeting to get inappropriate, Sir?”

He chocked a little as his eyes widened. He wanted to slap himself across the face in response to his pathetic reaction. Shouldn’t the age gap mean something? Why was he behaving like he’s on her leash? Why was he this…nervous? Excited?

Assuredly, she should be the one who is intimidated, meanwhile it’s her making the first move. He wasn’t sure whether this simply comes from his politeness and gentles; obviously, momma Evans raised him to be a respectful man. It’s apparent, the fear of scaring you was blocking all his possible moves. Risk of being reported for improper behaviour in the workplace was also a worry of his, but it came nowhere near the terrifying theory of frightening you.

But here you were. Being indecent with him. And oh, how he loved it. How he enjoyed this single sentence leaving your pretty lips. Your remarks were more enjoyable and exciting than everything he has completed with the woman he married in the past year, if not longer.

Was he being delirious? Did your comment indicated what he thought it did? Possibility of his mind playing games on him was high. It’s so easy to assume things happened when you wish for them to happen.

“Do you want to make it inappropriate? Do you want me to be inappropriate with you, Sir?” A deep breath left his mouth and a shiver travelling down his spine followed. He was now sure; he did not misunderstand. This was not his imagination playing him, tricking him into believing there’s something here that does not exist. All of this was very real.

“Whatever you wanna be on this call — I’m happy with,” He managed to speak out loud, fixing himself on the chair. This was a bad idea, he thought once again, a horrible idea that could quite literally ruin his career. Was he going to stop? Prevent this from happening? No fucking way.

“Huh, you sure about that, Mr. Evans? I can get really filthy when I want. I am a naughty girl,” Your words hit him like a truck, and he couldn’t help the blood rush in his trousers. He licked his lips slowly and pressed his back onto the chair. He could say something, but he chose not to. Whatever you planned on doing suited him and there was not an ounce of interest in preventing you from doing so.

No further words were spoken. There was a moment of short silence that felt like forever. A moment for someone to back up, break this madness off. No one expressed a need nor a want to stop. She played with her nipples through her shirt before they journeyed up. The straps of her pale pink top slowly moved down her arm, his eyes patiently followed. To him, you were mesmerising. At this moment you had his whole attention.

Looking straight at him, her hands removed the top and carelessly dropped it on the floor. His eyes glued onto her as the soft material left her body completely. He tensed as his length twitched, reacting to her breasts and hard nipples. Her skin was complemented by the colour of a previously worn top but seeing her without it sent shivers down his spine.

Chris could feel the discomfort in his pants becoming unbearable, needing to expose himself immediately. With shame, but still, he slowly undid his zipper. For a while now the feeling downstairs was insufferable, pleading and begging to be uncovered by his hand. Chris gulped back the lump in his throat as he completely freed his member. The view on the screen made his dick ache, his length twitched, jumping again his tense stomach.

“Liking this?” She teased, firmly grabbing her breasts. His eyes darken when he took in all her naked presence. The way she touched herself, he wanted that too. He wanted to feel her nipples between his fingers. He ached to be close to her.

“I wanna see all of you,” His words escaped his mouth, hand firmly grabbing his cock. Without shame nor hesitation his member was stroked, slowly and decisively, as his back leaned on the chair comfortably.

She was quick to listen. So submissive, he though, hand still firmly hugging his man part. He observed as she stood up, taking a few steps back. Still looking at Chris, her body turned around in a circle. Her moves were slow, very captivating, making Chris feel like every single movement was in slow motion. He already adored her body.

Her hands roamed around her own body before she slipped her hand inside her shorts and panties. Subtle movements of her hands indicated she’s pleasuring herself right in front of him. By her expressions, he was able to conclude that she’s enjoying herself. She didn’t play with herself for too long. Pulling the defiant material down as her eyes travelled to his, she exposed herself completely. He felt his mouth dry at a sigh of her bare body. She gave him a sultry look, realising the power she now held over him.

“Is this how you like me, Mr. Evans?” She broke of the silence, still exposing her hot flesh. It took Chris a couple of second to even register the question, his imagination run too wild to focus now. “Do I like you naked? It’s certainly a more thought-provoking image than how I usually view you,” He teased, slightly raising the corner of his lips in a smug smile.

Licking his lips once again, he watched as she took a box from underneath her bed. It was a regular box, nothing fancy. Taking off the lid her hand searched inside for a short moment before pulling out a pink dildo. Suiting, he thought, always liking this colour on her. He admired how her skin tone was complemented by the shade.

“I love imagining it’s your cock fucking me instead of my dildo,” She said completely unprovoked, making Chris widen his eyes. They did something naughty, something filthy, yet this comment really threw him off. “I’m gonna show you how I play with myself when I think of you,” She added and waisted no time before sitting on the bed. Chris had to admit, he spotted the bed straight away when the call started. Picturing himself laying there, you next to him, he took some time imagining the wicked scene you two could create on that mattress.

“I will show you how much, how much I love picturing us together,” Her seductive voice reached Chris’ ears, his interest growing with every single second. There was this unexplainable fear within him at this very moment, fearing she is going to stop. He was helpless now, he needed her to entertain him long enough for him to reach satisfaction.

Licking his lips once again, he watched as she took a box from underneath her bed. It was a regular box, nothing fancy. Taking off the lid, her hand searched inside for a short moment before pulling out a pink dildo. Suiting, he thought, always liking this colour on her. He admired how her skin tone was complemented by the shade.

“I want you to watch,” His student said firmly, staring right at him. The sound of a dildo followed. Chris’ breath was caught in his throat straight from the anticipation of the next step she’s going to undertake. With hunger, Chris watched as she teased herself, rubbing her clit. The toy fondly slid inside of her, resulting in her lewd sounds and Chris’ silent moan.

Her nipples were hard, her unoccupied hand coming up to fondle them both whilst her bottom lip was taken hostage by her teeth. She was really enjoying herself; Chris could tell. The bed made a squeaky noise every time she moved. The call was so clear, thank God, he was able to enjoy every motion of hers. The moans, whimpers and groans escaping her pretty lips as she fucked herself with a toy. The quality of the video chat was good, but not great. He wanted to see her in full HD, he wanted to see the details. For now, though, viewing this was enough. This was damn good, so good. Those desperate hand movements, stuffing the length as deep as she could, it drove him insane. Oh, how he wanted to stretch her out like no one did before.

“Just like that, baby,” He groaned, squeezing his hard cock. He was conversating with you through moans, examining you as the vibrations caused tingles in your lower department. He couldn’t feel it, but he knew her pussy was throbbing and pulsing, desperate for more length to enter. His body parts were no different; his balls felt heavy and his dick was hard as a rock, begging for a dream release.

The heat began to grow within his body with each and every movements of hers. She kept him going, moaning his name, calling him daddy, reminding him who she’s pulling this show for. If only she had any idea what it did to him. A shaky hand wrapped around his length made rapid movements, fighting for his orgasm to arrive. Watching her, listening to her, it was magical. This craze he had within him, this fixation she caused – it was obsessive. A loud scream, her thighs closing on the pink toy and her eyes shut while she orgasmed was enough, it was everything.

The feeling of euphoria intensely swept through him as a creamy load exploded in his hand. She could not see it, but he knew she felt it. All that left his mouth was a silent “fuck” as he collected his breathe. Chris was in pieces, still processing previous events. It was now clear to him how he pleaded for that orgasm to happen, how he needed it. He was embarrassed to admit how strong, how intense, the load bursting onto his hand really was. Lucky for him, no one knew anything about it but him and himself.  

„You liked this little show of mine, daddy?” Her voice awakened his senses, causing his mouth to water once again. She caught him looking at his crotch, now surely convinced what happened. She removed the toy from her body, a silent whimper followed. She threw it away on the bed like it was nothing, like it did not help them both cum just minutes ago.

“So much baby, so much. Can you show me s’more? One more time,” He breathed, looking at her with lust. She obeyed, without hesitation; her body rose from the bed and did a slow, full 360 to demonstrate her delectable features. Maybe, he was delusional, but he was sure her juices travelled down her leg. If he were right next to her, his tongue would have taken care of that.

“See you in a seminar, right, Mr. Evans?” Her sweet voice rang in his ears followed by his quick nodding. He had a chance to see her collecting the missing wardrobe that she then put on right before him. Chris could not help but notice her shaky legs. She sat down in the exact same position as before. She reached for a cup, drinking, and sipping the liquid through a straw. Now, she was back to her regular self, looking innocent once again. It slightly woke him up, brought half of him to reality.

“Yes, Miss. I will see you there. Be good, huh?” Chris said casually or at least he tried to do so. He was caught by surprise, convinced that he’s going to slur over his words more. He caught a glimpse of her eyes, forming as much of an eye contact as possible through the processor. Her current thoughts seemed impenetrable to him, although he always thought he’s amazing at reading facial cues.

“Me and you both know - I won’t.”

The last words of his current interest sounded from his Mac. Sending him a flirty wink before pressing the right button, she terminated the call. The intense orgasm left his hand still somewhat shaking. Eyes focused on the screen, he looked like he was awaiting another glimpse of her to come back.

Chris’ ecstatic state wasn’t quick to falter. It took another couple of minutes for him to do anything. Literally, anything. He was already late for the next meeting, which he felt absolutely no remorse for. His eyes lowered to look at the mess he produced; his mind displeased as he had realised, he needs to move to clean it.

Once again, it was just him and his usual surroundings. The call was over, just like that, almost as if it never happened. Despite his deepest longing, he could not go back to what just happened, he could not relive it. Your moans and whimpers performed in his head like a favourite song one would put on replay without a hesitation. He was craving more, his fingers curled into fists as he felt his cock hardening again. He was not sure what his next moves in this matter will be, but he was more than sure he needed to be inside this beautiful body.

[barajasbryan92]

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[transcriptroopers]

Sorry if this question is a little too general a question, but here goes. I'm writing a story set during and after a nuclear-ish apocalypse and the main characters are cadets in a military academy. A lot of the conflict revolves around leadership through a harsh and stressful environment. My question is this: what are some behaviors you've noticed in CO/NCO's that indicated their in/competence? What actions motivated you? Give me some ways for a leader to fail their men or earn their trust.

This is actually a really good question! Thank you for reaching out to me!

 Well, I think everyone wants a different type of leader, so this is just my opinion. But what matters to me, in order, is the following:CompetenceNCOs and officers are in their position for a reason. They're in charge of soldiers while at the same time performing the task the army employed them for. It's not easy work, and very often a leader will falter either in performing their job or caring for their troops, or God forbid both. If an NCO is incompetent at maintaining his soldiers or an officer is incompetent at performing his job, that's a very heavy hit on our morale. One person who can't perform their duties hurts all of us. Furthermore, I'm more than willing to forgive someone for any of the following attributes as long as they're competent. And this competence spans all things. Soldier care, equipment maintenance, and job knowledge/instruction ability. If I’m an E-2 and the E-5 directly in charge of me is my MOS, I should be able to ask them any standard question about my job and they should either know the answer or know where to find the answer. If my NCO doesn’t know shit about what I do, why should I trust them to oversee what I’m doing?AttitudeSoldiers depend on their leadership for a lot of things. Instruction, well being, paperwork, and especially morale. If my NCO is a completely asshat and no one in the platoon likes them, our morale will be low, and we won't care that much about the mission. Now, I'm not saying the leadership has to be soft, because that's a whole 'nother problem, and I'm not saying they can't push us, because that's what they're there for. But it's essential for leadership to build a genuine rapport with their soldiers, or else we'll just wind up resenting them. Personally, the chill factor for me is very important in a leader. Someone who's got a stick up their ass just frustrates me; someone who thinks the only way to run a unit is to yell and punish frustrates me even more. Positive motivation is always superior to negative. OrganizationIs your leadership doing their job? Are they maintaining their paperwork? Are they aware of the current mission? Do they know what we need to be doing? Do we have to stay late because they forgot to tell us to do a task? Do we have to redo a task because they instructed us wrong the first time? Are our promotions and awards delayed indefinitely because they keep forgetting something? Our leaders need to have their shit in order or else everyone below them is going to be out of order. We understand when it's not someone fault, when our superior's superior is the one making a bad call, but there's almost nothing more infuriating to a soldier than leadership that, through their own actions, has no idea what's going on.SoftnessThis encompasses both work ethic and personality. If my NCO is too forgiving, too lenient, too easy, too lazy, I don't want them. There's a big difference between being chill and being soft. NCOs and officers NEED to be able to push us and step up to the plate. They need to know when Enough is Enough and when to put their boots down. Having a leader with no backbone is worse than having no leader at all. Laziness is a disease in leadership as well; they do have to delegate, but they absolutely need to pull their own weight as well, and we can tell the difference between a leader who's skimping on the work by passing it off and who's adequately utilizing their resources by delegating. 

I think these four things are probably the thing I look for most. Softness is the least bothersome trait to me because, due to the nature of Soft leaders, it's easy for someone who does know what they're doing to sorta replace them/nudge them aside and become a de facto leader. How a leader can fail their troops:-not being there during the hard times, and I mean not only combat but during unpleasant conditions like cold, heat, low food and low water. NCOs who hole up in a warm tent while their soldiers are out shivering will earn some resentment. -not ensuring their troops well being. NCOs ensure their troops are fed, watered, and rested the best they can manage. A good NCO will recognize when it's time to give their squad a break, even if it's only for an hour or two. It's true that some dire situations require drastic measures, but great NCOs will replace their soldiers in those circumstances so that they can get an hour or two of sleep or enough time to swallow a cup of coffee. I've known NCOs who were practically ready to fist fight someone to get food for their troops, and you bet we had their backs from then on.-blaming their troops for things that are their fault and taking credit for things their troops have done. NCOs are responsible for everything their troops do, good or bad. If the NCO messed up, that NCO needs to be upfront about how their fuck up resulted in their troops fucking up. -overreacting to failure and under reacting to accomplishment, not to mention uneven treatment. Sometimes all we need is a pat on the back or a handshake and to be told we did good and they're appreciative of our efforts. Sure, other rewards are even nicer, but often I was happy just to know my leadership thought I did a good job. Sometimes the only thing that kept me going was my leadership telling me I was the best at my job and they depended on me. Whether it was true, I don't know; I hope so. But the point is that if our achievements aren't acknowledged, we stop wanting to achieve. Similarly, it's important to punish us if we fuck up, but the punishment has to match the fuck up. We often know the difference between fair punishment and unfair punishment, and trust me, we DEFINITELY know when we're being targeted with harsher punishment than someone else who made the same mistake. Consistency is important. -we hold grudges because the army is literally high school. We remember when someone has wronged us and hadn't made good on it. It takes a lot to regain the trust of soldiers who've already lost their respect for you. Demanding respect because of a rank when it hasn't been earned can turn a number of soldiers against you. But if you fix yourself and start being a good leader again, we can forgive and move on. It sounds like NCOs and officers basically give everything to their troops, and that's exactly how it should be. Your troops will reward you with full strength effort, motivation, and tolerance for the inevitable bullshit. Especially of NCOs, they need to distract their soldiers from the pure bullshit that is the army, because it is pure bullshit, and we're very fucking aware of that. Furthermore, PNN, the private news network, is far reaching. Lower enlisted are not shy about talking shit about a bad leader, and it'll get around. Just the same, a good leader will see PNN return favorable reviews, and often if those favorable reviews get high enough there will be positive rewards from up high. Of course, this is all assuming a perfect world. Very frequently bad NCOs are sneaky and bad officers are asskissers, and they somehow avoid the karma of being a bad leader while good leaders fall wayside. Sometimes good leaders get into trouble and lose their rank, sometimes good leaders are overweight and are treated like shitbags, sometimes good leaders are disabled in some way and people look down on them. In reality, that’s s the way the cookie crumbles sometimes. Equivalently, some lower enlisted are pure ass and don't appreciate or respect even a good leader. A lot of us had very low tolerance for leaders who weren't completely perfect, and were quick to turn on them. I'd really like to say that those people probably had some real shit leaders in the past, and they'll come around if they get to meet a genuinely good leader. Some people are just fucking brats though; fuck them tbh. Ungrateful lower enlisted just breeds aloof and demoralized leaders. It's a two way street. Personally, I have a lot of respect for anyone who can perform their duties as an NCO or officer even 75% of the time. I cannot stress enough that being in a leadership position is not sunshine and roses.

-Spc. Kingsley

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"The key to the emotional dictionary ..."

 1. Enhancing self-awareness In order to control your emotions, you need to know exactly what kinds of emotions you are exhibiting in different situations. What feelings predominate? What emotions are repeated? How do you react to your emotions? Do you listen to them or deny your feelings? Concentrate on what you feel. You can mentally identify feelings, say aloud, write down on paper. Honesty with oneself is the key to an emotional vocabulary. Note, if you have triggers for certain situations that cause the same set of feelings, whether they are good or bad. 2. Pay attention to how you behave Human behavior shows us his emotions, even if he himself denies their existence. Pay attention to how you act when you are experiencing a range of emotions. Does this affect communication with other people? How do emotions affect your productivity? Emotional intelligence is very well manifested in social media. A person can create 1000 accounts, write obscene things, swear and manifest themselves in virtual life, as he would hesitate in real life. Some "advanced users" have learned to throw out aggression, pain and anger of their own lives in social networks. Observe how you manifest in social networks. Pay attention to your behavior, improve self-awareness, be honest with yourself and recognize the true emotions. 3. Emotional self-management Do you say before you think or think before you speak? We are all in constant growth and development. We learn new skills, develop interests, set new goals, build social relations. When your honesty grows with yourself, you will know your strengths and weaknesses better, therefore, your understanding of other people will improve, and you will gain the ability to build quality relationships. You will learn to think before you act and you will have the opportunity to curb your emotions and impulses before they begin to control you. If a person does not know how to control his emotional intelligence or he is at a low level, efficiency is reduced and behavior can have undesirable results. Emotionally clever people share their thoughts and feelings, they always try to identify the state in which they are and let others know that they are not tuned in, act out the role of "victim" or "controller." 4. Actions against reaction There is a difference between the response and the response to this answer. The reaction is an unconscious process in which we experience an emotional trigger. Our re-action is an expression for removing emotions (for example, you can get angry when someone corrects or argues with you). In order to change the trigger (emotion, reaction), you can warn a person: "I'm angry when you interrupt" 5. Increase the level of empathy Empathy is one of the qualities of people with high emotional intelligence. Sympathy increases the level of endorphins, and also increases tolerance and readiness for cooperation. By increasing the level of empathy, you will become closer to other people, learn to confront, your understanding of yourself and the world around will develop strongly. When you learn to empathize and compassion for other people, the need for gossip and condemnation will go down to the minimum and eventually disappear. 6. Develop your social skills  Developed social skills are closely related to emotional intelligence. When developing social skills, you need to discover the ability and ability to talk and communicate with others. People who focus on the well-being of others, not just on their own, have a higher level of emotional intelligence. 7. Creating an enabling environment  Positive thoughts create a positive atmosphere. Practice of positive thoughts over time turns into a real habit, and with a positive attitude it is easier and easier to achieve goals and do everyday business. To maintain a positive environment, I ask you to step out of the past and get into your future! Leave grief behind, like a heavy and unnecessary piece of luggage. Never and do not complain to anyone about your problems, even yourself. To complain is to be a victim and not be able to solve problems yourself. Emotional clever people admit that there is always another way to look at the problem, and there is always a solution - even if there is no understanding of how. Believe that the decision appears at the right time, provided a positive mood. 8. Motivation People with a high level of emotional intelligence can very well motivate themselves. They know how to write goals, visualize and do everything possible to get what they want. Such people are able to manage their time, states, be effective and carefully select the environment.

9. Be happy!

Many people think that happiness is closely connected with material things, such as gifts, entertainment or goods. Lacking them, we feel stress, confusion and resentment.   Emotionally intelligent people understand that happiness is inside, and they themselves can "turn on" it when they want to be focused or effective. 10. Now is the time At any age you can begin to develop your emotional intelligence and get pleasure from it. When you learn to see emotions in the form of blocks, emotional intelligence will begin to develop at a rapid pace. Begin to develop yourself and very soon you will reap the fruits of personal growth. Take emotional happiness in your hands, and get a healthy, happy, successful and rich life!