#I refuse to blame my other grandparents for forgetting how to speak their other languages after childhood

[always-a-slut-4-ghouls]

Me learning Norwegian: okay, a few new letters, I can figure it out alright… I think.

Me trying out a Swedish lesson while not being fluent in Norwegian yet (still working on it): oh no, new alphabet just dropped (actually English just got rid of a bunch of letters, but still! New to me!) and I keep using the Norwegian spelling

Me glancing at the Icelandic to English dictionary my grandma (who’s parents were bilingual) let me borrow: oh no. Oh man. Even MORE new letters! No wonder it’s rated so high on lists of languages that are hard for English speakers to learn 😳 (growing resentment at my great grandparents for not teaching their kids how to speak both languages)

[mylifeasteejeh]

POOPYTHINGY

Hello sweets, This is my first ever blog/whatever you wanna call it. So as many of you know that everyone makes a mistake and I did too. It was a huge mistake, I was going through this creepy phase called “Friendless” (Well I am still friendless but it is not important rightnow I have done enough crazy things, and now I am over this phase,not over it but definately I am over with it.)

So, I was fucked up I didn’t have friends (well I did but I was getting detached from them). Anyways, I was a high school junior ,“A friendless Nerdy fugly” high school junior. Out of the need for a friend I joined the world’s most creepy and fucked up social media platform, now if you know which platform I am talking about then you know what kind of people are there.

And it’s called *drumrolls*

Kik,

Yeah I know Kik, now I think this is enough for you guys to know how fucked up I was.

So, basically guys Kik is a “World of all the heartbroken lovers/Creepsters/All time Sexuallyaroused freaks/Jobless Dicks or Vayjays (Girls are there too) ”. Although some people are nice there but being a part of that platform proves that You’re Dab-shit crazy. Yup, So I had join this crazy Poopythingy (Wait, this is nice okay so lets call Kik a “Poopythingy”) when I was a 8 grader and nothing really happen at that time and I got bored so I deleted it. Then, all of a sudden, you know that one moment when your mind says “ okay bitch, I am getting bored let’s get your life into a shit”.

*Brain searches through the “Fuckingfreakishlycrappyandweird Up things i saved this bitches Ass from” File and Takes out the closest or random option*

Therefore, out of the blue in my chemistry class I got this idea or I suddenly got this recap of what the 8th grader me had download, and then I am like “let’s Re-download that app again” And now guys I have that Poopythingy again in my phone.

*SlowClaps and Tears of joy*

Well, I was feeling like The great Columbus, searching for new friends to whom I can cry about my life and fucking everything.

I know you all are thinking that it was stupid of me, But you know What? “The brain wants What it wants” and I am a cancer Motherfuckers, yeah a CANCER. So this explain pretty much everything, therefore,you can’t blame me.

So The Columbus, made a fake account by name “Tris�� ( yes, I was inspired by Divergent series). So, My boat (The account on Poopythingy) was ready for the trip, I also got inspired by this book I read where the girl meets her bestfriend through social media.

*Eyerolls*

Yup, I was inspired by a RomCom Book. So, I got these Message requests from all the “Jake to Chris” and most of them had Justin freaking Bieber as their profile picture ( I feel bad for Justin), Well, the ones who had JB as their pro pic were from my country mostly, the guys from other countries were more smart and used varieties of Different celebrities and even pics of “Things Which must not be named” (more like organs) . And they had these creepy Bios “I will make cute babies or Lyrics of songs”, and guys from my country had these R-rated poetry thingys which were picked up from “The Universal PickUp lines/ Peotry thingy Book” (Every heart broken guy/girl in my country has this Book, their brain which is smaller then my thumb automatically downloads this). So, i got a lot of crazylyfreakish messages. But Boy, I didn’t loose hope, my brain was not letting that candle of “lets get your life fucked up” blow.

I kept on searching, one robots ( it has robots for different things, like for dating/getting the solutions to your problems etc etc) to other. After, a lot of hardwork, searching day and night, joining one group ( got kicked out from two, because of my nationality, I was more smart the third time and told them that I live in some other country, because I knew that most of those suckers were from my country pretending to be from other country) to another. I kept looking and when I felt that finding a friend here is as difficult as finding a water castle in a dessert, I lost all the hope. I was about to leave ( keyword: about)

But my brain had other plans.

*It wanted me to open one of my message request and talk to the person who had messaged me recently* And this is exactly what I did.

Well, guys at least this guy had is own pic as pro pic, so 10 points to me for at least not choosing one of those JB guys.

Well, I talked to him for an hour, he was pretending to be from London, his e-mail address below his username gave him away (oh wait, lets call my so-called friend Voldemort) so I asked Voldemort “why do you have different name in your E-mail address”. Now, your bitch here is great at faking it so I had create a fake E-mail with name tris@blahblah something and used it for my fake account. And when he asked how do I know how to speak/read his language then I made up a story that my dad is from your country and he shifted to this country due to bussiness and he met my mom here and they got married, yes I created a sappy love story for my parents.

Now, I don’t know what got into me I told Voldemort truth about myself. We shared phone numbers and became good friends. He called me every night, although I told him to only message me and never call me. But he didn’t listen, I talked to him for a week. I had a breakdown when i was was on a call with him and after that we became bestfriends, I don’t know how but he always knew when something was wrong with me or will call me to check up on me, it don’t know but I felt good whenever I used to talk to him. It was a nice change. And then I told my sister about him. She was happy but told me to be careful.

Now if you’re a Cancer then you know that we trust others like crazy but if someone sow a seed of doubt then we start overthinking and then we suddenly become Sherlock Homes. Like bruh, we have a mind of spy, we listen carefully to what you say and think about every single word you say.

Okay, so Voldermort here did say some things and then refused that he didn’t say what he said, so me being me I ignored and thought maybe he forget or I just brushed it off. But after my sister said “Be careful”, I started overthinking and I thanked that Poophead for warning me. It was getting hard for me to ignore his words now, and one day he suddenly said that he likes me. I was happy that a guy liked fugly little me and I liked him too because he was there for me when I was alone, I was over the moon and my heart was thumping like crazy in my chest and I had butterflies in my stomach when I heard him say those three words “ I like you”. I was happy and told him that I liked him too, but you know that it’s not possible to be in a relationship with someone you don’t trust. Well, I liked him and was not thinking straight when I was talking to him, he had that kind of effect on me, his voice had that kind of effect on me ( his voice was hypnotising) and no one has ever had that kind of effect on me. I brushed off all the doubts that I had. I talked to him normally. Then the shit started happening he called me next day and said that he likes this girl in his school I was taken aback and was like okay, cool I will help you to get her if you want. And then he said that he is in “love with her”. And I was confused because last night he said that he liked me ( And It was in more than friends things). I didn’t say anything I just listened to him, he talked about her for an entire hour. So, I thought that maybe he liked this girl a lot, so I was okay with it. But then he stopped talking about her he started talking about me and said “You know you’re more then a best friend and a girlfriend and you will even be more important to me then my wife”. And at this time I was freaked out because I knew what he was doing, I understood that this fuckster was playing with my brain. But again I brushed it off, next day he said that he loves me, and This was what I shouted at 2:00 am in the morning “WHAT?! FUCK NO” thank God my parents and grandparents were not at home and only my sister was with me. I knew that this was crazy and I should stop it. Next, day he again talked about this girl he likes and that she is his neighbor. I thought it was the same girl but she wasn’t and he denied guys, he denied telling me that he liked a different girl one day ago.

Voldermort here even after knowing that I hate lies was lying to me. I fumed up I mean Sweet bunnyfussy slippers, NO ONE LIES TO ME. And then, it all clicked he is playing with me. But then when I showed him the proof that he did tell me that he likes someone else, he made an excuse saying “oh, she’s..I just have a crush on her”. And I thought okay, I gave him a benefit of doubt.

But then this kept on happening and I knew that I can’t brush his words off anymore like not even a slightest I just can’t and then when he called me I blocked him.

But my brain had other plans

*He was like let’s make you unblock him because Bitch I am not done yet* and I did exactly that I fucking unblocked him. And confronted him, I knew I need that and I wanted to get completely over with this, I wanted to put a full stop on this.

Now, I unblocked him but I waited for him to text me and when he did, he said “I called you because I lost my grandpa in an accident and I was in the hospital” but guys when I last talked to him, he was with his friends watching movie. But before I can point it out he spoke again, he said “ I am coming to your city and since we are friends again can we meet?” And I said “No,we can’t” and He said “ look I am getting this dress stitched for you and and I already paid for it, so can you tell me your Size, because I want the dress to be perfect” and I said “ look I don’t want any dress and don’t even talk to me ever again I am blocking you” He said “ I don’t want to hear anything you are going to take the dress, do whatever you want to do with it burn it for all I care, I know you that you will take it anyways after reading the name of the label”. After reading this I felt like a fucking gold digger. And no one has ever said those words to me. And he crossed all the limits. I told him “The I don’t wanna fucking talk to you and this is it I know that you are a lair, I was ignoring all of your lies and don’t you ever call me” He said “ if you’re not going to talk to me then I will die” and this was it, this guy was totally black mailing me because he added “ my mother is not at home I am alone you know I can cut my wrist” I was freaked out people and I knew that he will not do anything I knew it, but if I stop rightnow of if I listen to him then he will use this as an advantage in future and I can’t let a guy have so much control over me so my last words to him were “Then, have a great time in between hell and heaven because Satan will not let you enter the hell and heaven is obviously out of the option for you”

Then I blocked him.

*My brain freaking had the guts to say I told you so*

Well, I know this is pretty fucked up thing but I learned one thing from this case that The best friend you can ever have is yourself. You don’t need anyone else for making yourself happy. I know sometimes it can be lonely and you need someone.

You know when I feel like this, I do something to distract myself specially my brain.

Another thing I posted this is to warn you guys to never download that Poopythingy. And that if you’re going through this then remember that you’re not the only one with bad luck in making friends.

Also, reading something and experiencing something are two different things, so please when you’re reading this, I request you to put yourself in my shoes. And even if you don’t get what I am trying to say then well then you should do nothing. I don’t care.

I was actually reading out chats, and those are cringy AF, I was such a kind a year ago. I mean yuck I will never talk to someone the way I talked to him.

[sienna-walsh]

[plaidred]

Dear America,

In these time of trouble please be kind to one another. If you are Christian please know that you are not very Christ like if you are not following the 13th commandment to love your neighbor as yourself. Yes, this means loving your Islamic, Jewish, non-Christian, LGBTQA, non-binary, non-white and immigrant neighbors. You don't have to agree with someone's religion or way of life to show compassion as a human being. In all of this do not forget your humanity. I myself am moving away from the Christian label I was raised with because I see so little of the virtues they esteem. I don't see the love or forgiveness. I don't see the compassion. All I see is small minded people refusing to accept another view point. As a person who lives with a debilitating chronic illness for which there is no cure (aka, a pre-existing condition) I am afraid I will be directly affected by the President's motives. As a woman I am afraid of what he is trying to do to the rights to my body and my decision on when, how and if I want to have a child. I am worried about a great deal of things that are rapidly being put out by Congress right now. And yet I know that there are others out there that have a much more to fear from Trump's regime, and I am frightened for you. I am frightened for my gay and trans friends, I am frightened for my non-binary friends. I am frightened for my friends with a different skin tone. I am frightened for my friends who came here from a different country. Please remember that America is a country that was built on immigration. Long ago the first people to step on this land migrated across a land bridge by the Bering Strait. Centuries later Europeans came across the ocean to this place, and soon it was a continuous stream of different people coming to settle. These people came from different ethnic groups, they came from different religions, they came from different political and economic situations. And yet they bonded together to form the 13 colonies and found the government of this country. Now there have been many atrocities in America's bloody history. The white Europeans, and later Americans, have done, and still do horrible things to the native peoples that first colonized this land since the last ice age. Americans have also done awful things to other ethnicities, they systematically segregated people of African descent and created an ethic of hatred towards them. America devalued these peoples lives. Throughout time American has always had growing pains, placing hatred on the newest or largest wave of immigration and placing all blame on them. What Americans seems to forget is that if you go through every single one of our ancestries you will see that we are all literally children of immigrants. Maybe some of us have had families here for generations, or maybe you are the first generation in this land. Maybe your parents or grandparents still speak the tongue of their mother land and struggle with English. This is nothing new. For those of you that say "You are in America, speak English!" you must be forgetting that unless your ancestry is purely English that your great-great-great grandparents were once foreigners here and struggled to understand the language. I have stories of my ancestors to this land who didn't speak a lick of English. It was their children who went to school and learned English and taught a few words to their parents, but their parents never truly learned English. It didn't matter much, they were farmer people who worked the land. As long as they worked hard and didn't treat their neighbors unkindly they got along fine. So have some compassion. Be kind. Be loving. Don't give in to hate. I don't know how to not be afraid. I don't know what will happen in the coming time. Be watchful, stand up with your neighbors and don't give in to the hate rhetoric that is freely flowing around you. Dear America, I don't know what you are coming to, but I believe that as long as we remember to keep our humanity above all else that we as a nation can pull through this.