#I really wish I didn't peter out when I did on posting my stuff

[get-rammed]

Let me guess, cassie's dad was Bonnie's handler when he was alive still wasn't he. (Bonnie being alive I mean) I mean Bonnie was his favorite uwu.

Nope! Bonnie had a whole different Handler, and I'm sticking with that 😂 as she was made WAY before we knew about Cassie and all of Ruin. Or at the least before I knew. My ass didn't know about the books until about 2 weeks ago so. And I haven't read them yet so idk what's in them besides gore. But Bonnie's Handler was a middle aged lady who grew up with Fazbear stuff :) didn't mind Bonnie sometimes ate cats-

Fun idea though. I'll probably yeet his ass in as a basic Handler or maintenance if we ever get a canon design for him 🔥 someone who helped Bonnie's Handler out when she wasn't able to do something

[eccentricgrace]

We Got Peter! (I Wish He Were My Kid) || IronDad

summary: five times the avengers meet peter parker, and the one time they realize who’s training him

tags: fluff, domestic, pov avengers, tony stark is peter parker's parental figure, peter can wield mjolnir, tired parent clint barton, hulk loves jokes <3

wc: 6,187

cross-posted on ao3 under the same name!

1. clint barton

Clint Barton is the first one to meet him.

His hands were blistered beyond belief from a foolhardy training session with the new girl, and with broken blisters brought blood. He just needed to get some bandaids, and one would think that an item as such would be easy to find in a compound designed top to bottom to cater to a superhero's every whim, but no.

He's in the only place someone can apparently find bandaids, when suddenly this curly brown-haired kid stumbled in looking the age of his eldest son. The kid wore pyjamas, a faded NASA tee and flannel pants, and he was walking while still hooked up to an IV, of which he held the stand beside him.

He froze when Clint was very obviously staring him down, and had the audacity to look caught.

Clint's getting real tired of picking up random kiddos that get themselves into trouble, so he cocked his head at the teen. "Who are you?"

"Peter," Peter answered with wide eyes. He had a healing shiner on his cheek, bruised a light yellow.

"What are you in here for, Peter?"

Peter opened his mouth, and then closed it. He awkwardly lifted the hem of his shirt up to reveal his entire torso heavily bandaged. Then he grimaced and dropped his shirt back down. "I wanted to go to the bathroom. Didn't want to call anyone for help."

Clint pulled a face. He looked around the medical wing for anyone else in sight, but the place was dim. He looked back at Peter. "Is someone supposed to be watching you?"

Peter shook his head. "I'm supposed to just rest. Everyone else is asleep."

Clint grunted. He looked back down at his hands and quickly peeled the bandaids out of their packaging, wrapping them expertly around his fingertips. "Well, get back in your bed, then."

Peter complied easily, settling back into a rumpled bed just across from the cabinets of medical supplies. He pulled the comforters back up, and Clint watched as his nose twitched and his teeth clenched from the movement.

Clint internally sighed. He closed the cabinet. "So, what's a kid doing with an injury like that? You someone's responsibility around here? Is it Steve?"

Peter shook his head tiredly and tilted his head back on the pillow. "No, not Steve. And the injury isn't... that bad, it's just— It stings, a little."

Clint walked over to the IV and narrowed his eyes at it. "This is strong stuff. Looks like it's running a little low, though."

"Yeah," Peter frowned. "It was dripping really fast, and it's almost been twenty four hours. The doctor lady, um, Dr. Cho said it should be switched out then."

"And where is she?"

"Got called away on a mission," Peter explained. "Something went wrong with some agents in Helsinki, they needed emergency medical attention."

Clint resigned. Guess he was taking care of this one, too. He walked over to the medical supplies and took a new bag of IV fluid before returning to Peter. "I'm gonna switch it out for you, hopefully that'll fix it up, okay?"

Peter nodded.

"So," Clint tore the opening. "How'd you get the stab wound?"

"How did you—"

Clint leveled him with a look. "You think I made it this far without recognizing a stab wound, kid?"

Peter furrowed his eyebrows. "Wrong place, wrong time."

Clint didn't believe that for a second. He narrowed his eyes at Peter and then went back to the IV, closing the clamp below the drip chamber. "And who's supposed to be watching you? The one who's asleep?"

"Mr. Stark," Peter answered quietly. "But he was worried sick ever since I got here, and I finally got him to leave and go to sleep, so I couldn't just call him back down here."

Clint studied Peter carefully. He stuck the IV spike into the port and then hung the bag back onto the stand. "Yeah, that checks out. Tony never can take care of himself."

Peter hummed noncommittally. "Thanks for drugging me."

Clint snorted. "Yeah, no problem."

He sat down beside the teen's bed. Peter tilted his head at him questioningly.

"I'll stick around til those meds kick in," Clint shrugged off. He hesitated. "How old are you?"

"Sixteen."

Clint smiled knowingly and nodded. "My son— The oldest one, he's fifteen. I thought you two looked around the same age."

"What's his name?" Peter asked politely, looking quietly grateful for the company. "Your son."

"Cooper," Clint answered gruffly. "Lila's my daughter, she's the middle kid. Youngest is Nathaniel, Nathan for short."

He nodded firmly. "They're good kids. They look out for each other, I'm grateful for them."

Peter smiled softly. "Tell me about them. If you want."

Clint scratched at his chin and leaned back in his chair, propping his feet up. "Why don't you tell me about yourself first? You're kind of the anomaly in this scenario, kid."

"Heh," Peter grinned. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Uh... What do you want to know?"

Clint had kids. He knew the best things to talk about with them, because they were his.

Nathan was the easiest, he was still a little itty bitty thing that barely reached his waist in height, and his favourite topics were the talking trains on his television shows and bargaining for more bologna on his sandwich at lunch.

Lila was second easiest, because she loved archery—she's gonna grow up to be a real class act like him, it's in the genes— so he'd bring her to the range and they'd talk about techniques.

Cooper was trickier, getting into that independent mindset and all, and it was hard to get a sentence or two out of him if he wanted to figure something out by himself. Clint always got him to spill though, props of working as a spy with background designed to persuade information.

But again: those were his kids. Clint Barton wasn't exactly the easiest guy to talk to, either. He decided to settle for a middle ground if he wanted conversation.

"What's your favourite subject in school?"

"Chemistry." Peter shrugged. "It's really easy, though."

"Well, there are AP classes for chemistry, aren't there?" Clint tilted his head. "You ever tried out for those? Heard they're great for colleges. Where you trying to go, New York University? Yale? What are the other big ones..."

"Uh, MIT." Peter nodded his head. "I'm trying to get into MIT. And I'm already taking the AP classes."

Clint blinked. "Oh. Well, alright then. You're set."

Peter smiled. "Guess so."

"So..." Clint drummed his thumb tiredly against his knee. "Tony, huh? Didn't know he had a... you."

"I'm interning," Peter rattled off quickly. A practiced excuse. He maintained direct eye contact, his chin jutted out with pride from his own lie. It did not go unnoticed to Clint.

"Oh, interning for Stark, eh?" Clint said. "I didn't know he had an internship program. Even more shocked a kid would sign up for said program. Sounds really boring."

"It can be sometimes," Peter shrugged. He glanced down at his own wound and broke into a sheepish grin. "You wouldn't want it to get too exciting though, otherwise you end up here. You know what I mean?"

"Tony's got a problem with employee health insurance?" Clint replied dryly, just trying to draw more information out of this teenager.

He still couldn't crack whether or not the kid was interning as an Avenger or if he was interning for Stark Industries and just got caught up in something he shouldn't have been around. ('Wrong place, wrong time' is a clever excuse, but not telling enough.)

"Oh, no!" Peter furrowed his eyebrows and backtracked. "No. That's not what I meant. I meant more like, exciting like when Avengers stuff is happening and like, sometimes that makes me a target for bad guys— working here, I mean. Not like, as an actually Avenger. Definitely not that, ha. I'm just a kid."

He sniffed in finality as he ended his sentence.

Clint studied him nonchalantly. "Sure."

"I feel really chatty all of the sudden."

"It's the drugs."

"That actually makes a lot of sense."

"Yeah, you get chatty, and then you totally conk out."

"Oh."

Clint tilted his head, studying the kid with narrowed eyes. He was all fidgety, restless as he looked down at his dripping IV and then the folds of his bedsheets and then everywhere else. Clint cleared his throat. "I really don't think Tony'd mind being woke up, you know. If it's his responsibility to babysit."

He knew if his kids were in hospice, you wouldn't be able to pull him out of the room, and he wouldn't give a damn how tired he was. That's just parenting.

"It's not babysitting," Peter argued, his nose scrunching up. "I'm entirely capable, like, practically an adult. Besides, Mr. Stark hardly sleeps, so like, waking him up isn't exactly on my weekend itinerary."

Clint grunted. "Alright, well, try not to keep yapping. Try and sleep, will you?"

"Yessir," Peter chirped.

Clint leaned his head back and closed his eyes, listening to the hum of lights and the aircon. Silence for a few seconds, and then—

"...Are you just gonna sit there? You can— You can go, if you want. I can get to sleep on my own, dude."

Clint exhaled stiffly through his nose. Unfortunately, his conscience won't allow him to leave til he knew this teenager was sound asleep. He couldn't just tell him that, though.

"I'm making sure you actually sleep and don't crawl your scrawny dumbass out of bed," Clint said simply, keeping his eyes closed.

"Can't wait to tell Ned that Hawkeye kept me hostage in the med bay," Peter joked, his eyes starting to droop and his tone beginning to lull. (Bingo. One step closer to knock-out town.)

"Yeah, yeah," Clint crossed his arms and went back to being quiet.

A few minutes later, he tilted his head up to peek— Peter was totally out cold, his mouth wide open while drool ran down his chin. Clint snorted softly and stood up to leave.

He could have sworn on the way there he heard Tony down another corridor, bickering with F.R.I.D.A.Y. about getting out of bed to check on "the kid."

Clint's mouth pulled up at the corner and he disappeared into the elevator.

2. thor

Thor was wandering from the kitchen when he saw the smaller Midgardian standing on the lawn outside, his arm stretched out with a strange device on his wrist.

He lazily swerved his axe back and forth and watched the child with interest, and finally decided to go out and investigate himself.

He swallowed the mouthful he had of bread. "I've never seen you before."

The child in question practically jumped out of his skin. He whipped around, his eyes wide, his jaw dropped— the device on his wrist dropped and shot a strand of string out uselessly to the field.

Thor raised an eyebrow.

"Oh," the child gasped. "Oh my god. Oh my god. Holy— It's— You're just— You're on Earth!"

"Yes, I'm visiting," Thor smiled wryly. "Did they begin to hire new Avengers while I was gone? Little ones, specifically?"

"Sorta," he blurted, looking upwards with awe. Then he quickly shook his head. "Not because you were gone! Just— I'm in training. No, I'm not. I'm not an Avenger. I'm just— I make the— Wow, you have — Really big muscles—"

Thor nodded sagely. "What's your name again?"

"Peter," the human said quickly, face going red. "Peter Parker."

Peter's eyes drift down to the axe hanging limp from Thor's hands, and then they widened all over again. He smiled shyly. "Can— Can I try it?"

Thor chuckled with amusement, holding the axe out. He flexed it out a few times. "Ah, this beauty. You can sure try, but it requires a very powerful heart, and you are ... very small. Like a splinter of the Yggdrasill. Itty-bitty."

He shoved the axe down in the soil with ease and continued talking as Peter put his hands firmly around the handle. "You see, it was forged by the power of a star—"

Peter used all his strength to yank the axe off, but not even a portion of it was needed. The thing flew upwards, flinging grass and bits of dirt everywhere. It pulled itself over Peter's shoulder from the force of his strength and he fell backwards into the lawn.

Thor stopped, words simply evaporating from his mouth.

"Oh my god," Peter repeated again. He slowly sat up, pulling the axe back over he shoulder with a lot more ease and simply holding it out in front of him with his... puny, twig arms.

Thor closed his mouth. Opened it again. Closed it again. This child— no. This man was now worth of his respect. He smiled nervously, shifting around on his feet.

"Uh. Oh," Thor stumbled. He clicked his tongue. "Um... Huh."

"This is so cool," Peter huffed, grin breaking out on his face. He turned the axe over in his hands. Then he held it back out to Thor. "That means I'm worthy, right?"

Thor made a cringing noise— a so-so motion with his hand. He scratched the back of his neck. "What's your father's name, Peter Parker?"

Peter made a face of discomfort.

"Your guardian," Thor corrected easily.

"May Parker?"

"Son of May Parker, I must admit, I underestimated you," Thor sighed. "...At least Stark can't wield it."

Thor stood there for a moment, looking down at Stormbreaker with a thoughtful frown on his face. He rolled his eyes and looked back to Peter. "Do you know where Banner is?"

Peter shrugged, looking caught between bewilderment and shock.

Thor nodded simply. "Well. It was an experience to meet you, Peter Parker."

He left without a second thought, leaving nothing behind him except a teenager stuck in an existential crisis.

(As you do.)

3. natasha romanov

Natasha met Peter for the first time in the Gym, the second floor of the Avengers Compound, West Wing.

"You up for some combat training?" Tony had asked her, looking up lamely from his mug of steaming black coffee. He had bags under his eyes, dark circles heavily visible.

"Why?" Natasha mused. "You feeling rusty, Tony?"

"Har har. No, not for me, for some new blood. Avengers recruit. He spent the other night in the med bay, I'm not exactly anxious to have that happen again," Tony sighed. "He's got some basics down, and he's strong, but figured he could do with some spider-hero tips."

That was all she was told. (What she inferred was her own business.)

She sat on the mat of the gym, waiting patiently for the new recruit to come in. She heard the gently swishing of the glass doors, and footsteps that stalled.

Natasha turned to meet him. She's greeted with the sight of a teenager, complete with a backpack, a shy smile, and a nervous wave. He wore sweats, a t-shirt, and faded out shoes that looked a step away from a shoebox coffin.

"Black Widow?" He asked. He shuffled on his feet. "Or should— Do I say Natasha? Ms— Ms. Romanoff?"

Needless to say, she was wary. She had her own morals on whether children should be able to fight, but she tried to keep in mind the circumstances. Whoever this kid was, he'd already spent time receiving medical attention from the other end of a fight, and if Tony was looking that exhausted over him then he must be one stubborn mule.

He'd benefit more from training than a scold to stay away from danger. Hero type, just like Steve. She'll give it a shot.

"Natasha's fine," she said simply. She stood up and crossed her arms. "Are you gonna tell me your name?"

"Peter Parker," he said, setting his backpack to the side. He kicked his shoes off and stepped onto the mat, holding his hand out for Natasha to shake.

Rookie mistake.

Natasha shook his hand, smiling pleasantly. She gave the handshake a second and a half before attempting her first move.

It was supposed to go like this: Natasha yanks him forward, shoves him to the ground, and pins him with one of his arms held backward. Easy. Something she was taught when she was six.

Instead, in the millisecond before she was about to move, Peter yanked his hand back. She saw a fleeting blur of Peter jumping over her.

She swung around, raising an eyebrow and her mouth opened in surprise. She pursed her lips, impressed. "Alright, then. You're full of surprises, aren't you, Peter?"

"I didn't realize we started," Peter said, exhaling through his mouth. He squared his hips and held up his fists with a focused dip in his brow.

"Gimme your best shot," Natasha grinned.

Natasha kept a close eye on him, watching as he stepped side to side, not making a move. Interesting.

She took a step forward, he took a step back.

She took a step backward, he—

He again jumped over her, dipped down, and swung his foot under Nat's legs. She fell on her back, looking up at the white vaulted ceiling.

"Oh, crap," Peter said quickly. He lowered his fists. "Are you okay? That was a little ha—"

She rolled to the side, grabbing Peter's knee and swinging upwards so their positions were switched. She caught her breath, now standing on both feet, and watched with curiosity as the kid started doing something... odd.

He started talking, seriously chattering up a storm, scrambling himself up in an unpracticed manner and matching her move for move. He wasn't refined in the slightest, and he pulled his punches hard. Natasha had no idea how much strength he wasn't even using.

His fighting was all slapstick, clumsy— he fought purely through instinct and with what Tony had properly summarized to her as "the basics." Simple punches. Kicks. He also seemed to rely heavily on his agility and flexibility, which Nat could respect.

He grunted after being shoved into the ground and tilted his head to the floor tiredly, his chest heaving with breath. "Oh man. I gotta say, I'm real glad I wasn't fighting against you back in Germany."

Natasha froze. She made a face and narrowed her eyes. "You're Spider-Man, aren't you?"

Peter furrowed his brows up at her and wrinkled his nose. "Um, yeah? I thought Mr. Stark told you that."

She pulled back fully, clearly signaling the training was over. She caught her breath again and analyzed his expression, the details in his face— youthful, stubborn confusion. She could see closer now some things she hadn't thought about before.

This teenager had been fighting toe-to-toe with Captain America that day, a little over two years ago.

"Tony wanted me to train you because you're going up against people you match your strength," she said bluntly, understanding now from all angles. "Because you don't know how to fight."

She thought back to the dark circles under Tony's eyes. The exasperation twinged with desperation in his voice when he asked.

Peter nodded slightly, looking sheepish. He was just a kid. He didn't ask for these powers, and yet, he was chomping at the bit to learn, to help.

Natasha held her hand out to help him up. "Alright, kid."

He looked down at her hand warily. "You're not gonna try to judo throw me again, are you?"

She smirked. "Not this time. I'm gonna teach you the basics on how to use that strength of yours. When I'm done with you, you'll be able to knock a guy unconscious with your pinky finger."

He huffed with amusement and took her hand, allowing himself to be helped up. "Awesome."

So that's how Natasha got another nephew.

4. bruce banner

It's four in the morning on a Saturday when Bruce Banner met him.

He had just woken up from a nightmare and felt... green around the gills. Deep breaths were calming, but not enough in the darkness of his bedroom, sweat dripping down his forehead as he carded his hands messily back and forth through his hair. After about five minutes where the underside of his skin still burned and pulled where it wanted to transform, he finally swung himself off the bed.

He took a cold shower, talking himself down the entire time the freezing droplets pelted his back.

"This bathroom is too small for you, Big Guy," Bruce seethed his teeth, vigorously rubbing shampoo into his scalp. "I'm not hulking out. We're not doing this tonight."

His heart lunged uncomfortably and Bruce scrubbed soap on the green-turning skin on his wrists. "Stop that, I'm not kidding around with you. Just forget the nightmare and go to bed."

His stomach turned, his skin stretching out as Hulk morphed the half of his face with an angry desperation. Hulk's voice came out of his throat, gruff and monstrous. "NO."

"This isn't a discussion," Bruce hissed back. He yanked the shower off, the handle breaking in his hands. He froze, inhaled deeply, and very calmly set the handle down. His eyes twitched.

"We're going to go get a nice, calming, cup of green tea," Bruce replied. "Then, we're going back to bed."

His stomach turned again. "JASMINE."

"Okay, fine," Bruce threw his hands up and stepped out of the shower, wiping the water off with his towel. "Jasmine. Fine. Whatever makes you happy."

Five minutes later, and he's stepping out of the elevator in a new set of pajamas, his hair wet and dripping down the back of his neck. He walked into the kitchen and clicked the electric kettle on. He picked up a mug from the cabinet, put the tea bag in, and waited with a tight frown on his face.

His eyes caught a light from the other room, coming from the ceiling. He looked up, and then subsequently froze.

A gangly teenager, sitting quietly on the living room ceiling, entirely razor-focused on a laptop that he held tightly on his lap.

Bruce blinked.

He blinked again.

The kid didn't disappear.

Bruce isn't sure what to do. The teenager didn't even seem to notice the predicament he was in, a stranger in a high-security compound who was also, you know, breaking the laws of gravity. Surely he had to belong to somebody. Someone had to have been mentoring him, maybe Steve or Nat.

(He hoped for his sake that it was not Natasha's mentee, because then he'd probably get his ass kicked for staring.)

Bruce scratched his head and turned the kettle off before it could scream, then poured the steaming water into his mug. He sat down and watched the kid curiously as he sipped his tea.

There was a lot to process. Luckily, he's a scientist, so he's had some practice at processing.

Bruce guessed that the teenager had conscious control over what he stuck to, begging by how tightly he gripped the laptop in his hands and how he fidgeted once, resettling himself where he sat, and still didn't fall.

What Bruce thought was even more interesting was how the teenager's face was of normal colour. Not a hint of purple, not even red. He wasn't breathing in a laboured way, either. Bruce had been watching him for two minutes now and he looked entirely normal, when any normal person would start showing signs of blood pooling. With this kind of biological capability, Bruce's best guess is that this ability is tied directly to his genes.

The kid narrowed his eyes. "X squared minus a hundred... divided by... But if I use the limit theorem then— Oh, my bad. I get it."

The teenager huffed with slight amusement and then went back into a silent concentration, his eyebrows furrowing as he read along the screen.

Differential calculus. Either a college student or an advanced high schooler.

Ten minutes passed, and Bruce had finished his scalding hot tea with little issue, much to Hulk's dismay. He kept his eyes on the teenager, waiting to gain more interesting details about the abilities he had.

Then his stomach turned again. Bruce immediately glared.

"Don't you do it," Bruce whispered.

His blood burned and his heart pounded angrily in his chest.

Hulk growled under his breath.

"Stop it," Bruce grumbled back. "Cut it out."

His fists clenched with a crack of his knuckles. "I'm DONE with watching," Hulk said defiantly.

"I don't give a shit! Hulk—"

"NO," Hulk roared, and his whole arm expanded and burned radioactive green. He reached out and shattered the mug, droplets of tea splattering across the kitchen. "DUMB SCIENCE STUFF."

And the illusion of being hidden disappeared in a cloud of smoke. Bruce quickly looked back at the ceiling and found the teenager to be gone, as if he had never even been there.

Bruce glared at the empty space. "I hate when you do this! You scare away perfectly nice people, and you're never compliant with what I want to do—"

His chest expanded with anger. Hulk's eyes burned with rage, and he pounded a fist down on the counter. "YOU ARE DUMB. NOT COMPLIANT. BANNER STINKS, HULK STRONG."

He could feel himself slipping away, and his skin shifted mossy green. Hulk roared again and swung his arm powerfully across the kitchen counter, the wood splintering in chunks while cabinet doors flung across the room.

Hulk turned to throw a punch at the counters behind him but his whole arm was halted by an arm unmistakably by... something. Hulk grunted and looked over his bulky fist, and made eye contact with the scrawny teenager from before.

"Oh shit," the kid breathed. "Uh... Hey, Mr. Hulk."

Hulk narrowed his eyes and curled a lip to show his barred teeth. "MOVE. HULK, SMASH KITCHEN."

"How about I tell you a joke instead?" The teenager said quickly. "You like jokes? I know a lot of jokes!"

"JOKE?"

"Oh, yeah," the teen nodded. "I bet I can make you laugh. It makes all the superheroes laugh, and you're— You're a superhero."

"HULK, SUPERHERO?"

"Yeah!" The kid smiled and slowly let Hulk's hand go. "Of course, dude. You're an Avenger."

Hulk stared.

"So do you want to hear the joke?"

Hulk jerked a tight nod.

"Okay, awesome!" The teenager sniffed. "What's a superhero's favourite drink?"

"WHAT?" Hulk asked.

"Fruit punch," he said with a grin.

Hulk paused, then he grinned and let out a boisterous laugh. "GOOD JOKE. HULK LIKE PUNCHING. HULK, SMASH."

And Hulk laughed, and laughed, and laughed— Until Bruce Banner leaned tiredly against the unbroken kitchen counter with the remains of his shirt draping around his neck. He looked up at the teenager with confusion. He furrowed his eyebrows. "You... You just stopped the Hulk."

The kid smiled back at him, eyebags under red eyes. "I think that if was like, even one percent more awake right now, I would be freaking out."

"Yeah," Bruce huffed. "Yeah, Hulk isn't pretty, I wouldn't blame you."

"No, I mean— Meeting you," he gestured up and down. "I was you for Halloween when I was a kid. I had like, a lab coat, and I carried around a printed out copy of your papers on Gamma Radiation."

Bruce blinked several times in shock and disbelief. He stumbled a bit. "You dressed up as Bruce Banner for Halloween? When— When you were a kid?"

"Yeah," the kid smiled nervously. He held out his hand. "Um, Peter. Peter Parker."

Bruce stared down at his hand and then finally shook it, his movements stunted and lazily from his surprise. "It's nice to meet you, Peter."

"Well, I really need to get to sleep," Peter said with a huffed laugh, looking up at the clock above the fridge. "But uh, it was nice meeting you too. I'll see you around, Dr. Banner."

Peter Parker was already well on a different floor before Bruce's mind finally caught up with him, and he realized he had forgotten to ask Peter about his powers.

(Not to worry, because it was only the next morning that Tony stalked into his lab with a proud grin on his face, and introduced him to Peter Parker for the second time, praising and prattling about how he had found a brainiac teenager smarter than the both of them combined.)

5. steve rogers

The first time Steve met him, it was completely and entirely by chance.

He was standing in the elevator, hands tucked loosely in the pockets of his hoodie. The floors flickered down from five, to four, three, two, and then they stopped. The doors opened and the kid bumbled inwards, backpack strung over his shoulder and earbuds in his ears— he's staring down at his phone.

"This bucket of bolts is never going to get us past that blockade," he murmured quietly, then smiled cockily. "This baby's got a few surprises left in her, sweetheart."

Steve's eyebrows furrowed in a curious amusement. Part of him wanted to speak up, tell the kid it wasn't safe to walk around without hearing or seeing your surroundings— if he had done that when he was Peter's age, he woulda found himself beat up in an alleyway behind the old theatre.

The other part of him didn't want to seem old and lame, so instead he jerked his chin up. "What are you watching?"

The teenager looked up quickly. His mouth opened in shock as he suddenly realized the company he was with— a look Steve was regularly given. He pulled an earbud out. "Uh, Star Wars."

"Oh," Steve nodded vaguely. "I've meant to watch that, at some point..."

"It's really good," the teen smiled earnestly. "I started watching this in the car on the way here, so I'll have to finish it after I see Mr. Stark, but—"

Steve raised an eyebrow with interest at the mention of Tony. He cleared his throat politely, shifting on his feet to look at him better. "You know, I don't think I've ever seen you before. What's your name, kid?"

"My name's Peter," he replied awkwardly and fidgeted with the cracks in his phone's screen protector. "Do I call you, uh— Mr— Captain? Captain, uh... Rogers? Er—"

"Steve is fine," Steve smiled teasingly. "Nice to meet you, Peter. Are you an intern? You look young. Not that I can judge, I was working at eight, passing newspapers to neighbors for a penny."

"...Yeah, I'm an intern," Peter explained, chuckling slightly. He cleared his throat. "Still in highschool though. You know— It's really funny, actually, because I had to watch one of your videos for class yesterday."

Steve grimaced. "Oh no."

Peter's smile widened. "I think I have your whole like, script, memorized. Hearing your voice saying completely different things is throwing me off."

Steve felt his ears go hot. He was crawling in his own skin, hiding his face behind his hand and smiling tiredly. "Those are a long story—"

"So," Peter continued seriously over him, doing what Steve could only assume was his best 'Captain America' impression. "You got detention—"

"No," Steve laughed hard, hand on his chest. "Why do they still use those? God—"

After what seemed like an eternity, the elevator door finally dinged. Peter smiled at him. "Well, uh, it was nice talking with you. Especially while not like, fighting."

Steve took a breath, confused and recovering from the previous bout of laughter. "Hm?"

Peter simply walked out of the elevator and saluted him with a grin. "Bye, Brooklyn."

The elevator door closed. Steve is left alone with his jaw dropped.

Who said the youth weren't surprising?

+1: tony stark

Rhodey wandered into the second floor living room of the Compound with the distinctive clicking noise of the prosthetics. He rapped his knuckles on the wall. "Anybody know where Tony is?"

Natasha, lounged on the white loveseat against the window, looked up from her book. "Is he even here?"

"Well, yeah," Rhodey huffed. "Where else would he be? Has nobody seen him even dig up here for coffee, like the star-nosed caffeine mole he is?"

"Nope," Clint said, sitting against the floor and scrolling aimlessly through his phone with an expression of eternal boredom. "Is he with his kid?"

Steve froze from his spot at the stovetop, looking up with alarm. The wooden spoon in his hand hovered above the boiling water pot.

Bruce furrowed his eyebrows and put the chess piece he was holding back on the board. He looked over to Thor, who was so ferociously concentrated on winning that he didn't even seem to hear the conversation around him.

Bruce kicked him lightly in the shin. "Tony's got a kid?"

Thor widened his eyes, looked up and around like a startled animal. "I wasn't aware Stark had offspring?"

"He has an intern," Natasha corrected with amusement, giving Tony, and the confused company, the benefit of the doubt. "Not quite his."

"Oh, that's his kid," Rhodey sighed heavily. "He's a scrawny little punk. Definitely Stark blood. I'll go check the lab."

"Hold it," Clint looked up in sarcastic awe. "You mean to say someone other than Bruce was let into the precious lab?"

"It's just a safety precaution," Bruce explained in embarrassed stuttered mumbles. "There's a lot of dangerous stuff in there—"

"But he lets a kid—"

"Intern—"

The elevator chimed. The doors opened and the two fools in question meandered out into the hallway. As they walked down to the living room, all the Avengers could hear a familiar voice all of which had been acquainted to ramble off.

"I'm just saying, I would've had more time to fix the calculations myself but I got caught up on everything with this huge guy who was totally tearing up Times Square," Peter rounded the corner, smears of oil and general mechanic schmutz on his cheek. He trailed closely next to Tony, who was grinning down at a holographic tablet and moving around parts of a digital suit rendering.

Tony wandered into the kitchen. "Yeah, I heard your report. I also heard, via May, that you forgot to do your homework again though, huh? What's your excuse for that one, kiddie?"

Peter hopped up on the kitchen counter, taking the tablet from Tony's hand. He started doing his own work on the render as Tony stepped around Steve to get to the fridge.

"Apple juice?" Tony called out, swinging the fridge door open. "We're out of the, uh... the Capri suns, but I put more on the grocery list for next time."

"Apple juice is fine, thanks," Peter chirped. He tilted his head and zoomed in on the Iron Man chest plate. "Mr. Stark, what if we changed the layering of the arc reactor to fit the nano-particles, instead of reworking the whole thing?"

Tony hummed, tossed back a bottle of apple juice (which Peter caught without looking) and closed the fridge. He took a seat next to Peter, but actually on a barstool rather than on the counter, and looked over at the tablet.

"Show me," he said blankly.

Peter moved some things on the screen, wrote down some numbers and letters, and looked up at him. Tony scratched his goatee in thought, and then nodded. He ruffled Peter's hair. "Yeah. Looks good, kid. I'll get the prototypes 3D-printed for next time and we'll put it all together."

"Awesome," Peter grinned. He cracked open the apple juice and sipped at it. He looked up at the rest of the living room. "Oh, hey, guys."

The Avengers at this moment were all suddenly on the exact same page, albeit with varying reactions. Clint, who was smirking, an eyebrow raised, knowing and maybe even a little impressed. Bruce, who had now put together the pieces he had and was pleasantly surprised, beside Thor who was only surprised. Steve, the most shocked, and Nat, the least shocked.

Meanwhile, Tony, finally looking up only when Peter said hello, recognized the people in the room. He nodded in acknowledgment. "Ah. Avengers, this is Peter."

"We know," Clint said smugly. "Pretty sure we've all met him."

"Sorry?" Tony furrowed his eyebrows. He looked between Peter, and then the rest of the Avengers. "When did you meet each other? Other than Romanoff and Banner, I haven't told anyone else about the kid—"

"I met them," Peter spoke up. He put his finished bottle of apple juice on the counter and smiled. "I met Hawkeye in the medbay one night, Steve in the elevator, and Thor on the lawn— that was really cool, by the way."

Tony hesitated, and then shrugged. "Alright, then. Anyways, nobody can steal him. You guys can get your own Avenger intern prodigies, this one is mine. Looking at you, Rogers."

Peter covered his face with one hand and stifled a laugh. "Mr. Stark—"

Steve put his hands up defensively, giving a kind smile. "No worries, Tony."

(Everybody knew it would be impossible to separate the two, anyways. But anybody would be lucky to have Peter as a kid-intern-thing...

Just ask Tony Stark.)

[cloudsinmargoscoffee]

margo i feel like we haven't talked at all about ttpd/the anthology ?? what are your favourites, how did you like the rest, what are your skips, tell me Everything (i personally am still very much enamoured with it, 31 songs can hold me for a looong time) <33

yeah, i was inactive at that time if i remember well. i actually have some controversial takes on ttpd. i feel like it's one of fandom favourites and meanwhile for me, it's my least favourite album she's ever made. when i first heard it, i was genuinely dissapointed. i admit it grew on me with time, but i rarely listen to it and when i do, i skip a lot of the songs. lyrically, it's a brilliant piece, but the musical aspect lacks to me. it feels as if the album only went through very superficial edits and cuts. it's too messy. and i get that the messiness is the part of the story she's trying to tell, but there are moments when that messiness feels more like lack of quality than an actual artistic device. i know you're a jack girlie, but ttpd really made me wish she worked less with him and more with aaron 😭 i like the anthology way more than the main part of the album. long story short, i like it, just not as much as taylor's other works.

i'll organize my favourites and skips into lists.

okay, so here are my favourites:

fortnight (post malone ate and left no crumbs)

down bad ("just to do experiments on, tell me i was the chosen one, show me that this world is bigger than us, then sent me back WHERE I CAME FROM" insane stuff)

so long, london (dare i say one of the best songs of taylor's discography)

fresh out the slammer (it feels like a hot summer and juicy peaches to me and her voice when she sings "now pretty baby, i'm running home to you" is soooooo)

florida!!! (my two favourite artists on one song, LET'S FUCKING GO. that part where florence sings "and your cheating husband dissappeared, well, no one asks any questions here" is so cunty)

who's afraid of little old me? ("cause i am dramatic")

i can do it with a broken heart (i was listening to it on repeat when i was taking driving ed to hype myself up, didn't get my license, but the song slaps)

the smallest man who ever lived (idk where and when taylor met my dad)

clara bow ("you look like taylor swift" i love when she does plot twists, i'm always like "oooo damn she's so smart")

the black dog (AND I HOPE IT'S SHITTY IN THE BLACK DOG YOU STUPID PIECE OF SHIT BITCH that's how this song makes me feel)

how did it end? (unfortunately, everything described in these lyrics happened to me this year so i use it to make myself feel even worse when i'm having a breakdown)

i hate it here (i just hate it here, simple as that)

the prophecy (i've been single my whole life)

peter ("you said you were gonna grow up and then you were gonna come find me" joe alwyn, i'm in your walls)

the bolter (that's me she sings about, btw!)

and here are my skips:

ttpd (i fucking hate this song, it turns me into some evil creature)

but daddy i love him (idk, i just don't like it)

and when it comes to the rest of the songs, i like them, but they don't make me rip my hair out or anything. sometimes i skip them, sometimes i don't. depends on my mood.

now your turn to tell me Everything! <3

[subdee]

Fanfic Writer Ask Meme: D, M, P(Freecs Adventure Travel Co.)

It's been weeks, I'm sorry ;_;

D: What’s the most personal fanfic you’ve written?

Hmmm... Maybe the phantom troup band AU?

Though it's weird to call it "personal" because my husband was the drummer in the indie band that got signed to the local record label and then imploded, not me, aha. Also - and you know this because you helped me write it - the story didn't really come together until I added Hisoka as the villain... An *external* villain, not a member of the band, bringing the drama. So that's different from what happened with RJ's band too. I was going to write something closer to life and then decided I didn't really want to put all the sordid details on the internet just to finish a fanfic (and they wouldn't necessarily have made a good story anyway).

M: What’s the weirdest AU scenario you’ve ever come up with?  Did it turn into a story?

I wish I had a good answer for this one... Actually I really want to just turn the question around and ask you, because you'd probably have a great answer, aha.

Well, I once wrote Peter Doherty / Carl Barat (from the Libertines) RPF where - spoilers! - Carl Barat wakes up as a cat in Pete's country mansion, so maybe that one? It's not on AO3, you can read it on livejournal if you really want:

The weirdest one I didn't write was also RPF... It was about a 16 year old prince and his slightly older philosopher-adviser but instead of setting it in 14th century Morocco I wanted to write it as a Dune-ish Space AU 1) so I wouldn't have to do a lot of historical research, and 2) so I could put in tons of BL tropes imagining these guys looking a bit like the leads from Crimson Spell. ^^;;; Still think this would make a decent original novel with the serial numbers filed off. I had tons of notes on this one on livejournal but I'm not having luck finding the post again.

P:  Where did you find the most inspiration for your story (Freecs Adventure Travel Company

Oh that one... It's in the author's notes, I wrote a chapter whenever I went on vacation aha. So they hike to St Mary's glacier (Colorado, USA), then they go scuba diving in a tropical place (I went snorkeling in Florida, I took liberties), then they're fishing on an island in a river like this one in Richmond (Virginia, USA), and then in the last chapter (not posted) it goes full circle, and they are hiking again and get caught in the rain and confess to each other (plus some other plot stuff), and it's very romantic, just like when RJ proposed in Hawaii.

I mean, that story isn't JUST about traveling, it's also about thinking about what Gon could do without nen and how it would work for Gon, Killua *and* Alluka to all spend time together. But since they're also travelling, yeah, it's all about places that I've actually been to.

[overpoweredcacti]

S17 Ep5 post-watch recap

I have way too many thoughts, this is going to be long and probably disjointed.

So I feel like a lot happened, but at the same time not really? Overall though, so far I'm really here for this Gold Star mystery and the MK Ultra/behavior modification/Frankenstein's monster stuff around it, I just hope they commit to it? I know so far they've made it a point multiple times how it's a "conspiracy theory" and it's "based on a half-truth" and so on but at the same time things just don't add up? Most notably, if the government has nothing to do with this, why would they care enough to hide it? Who has enough influence to stage Emily's arrest etc?

Anyway, since this was very complex I'll try to break it down to characters.

Damien/Jade

Honestly? I'm really enjoying them so far? They have a fun dynamic?Wish I knew their actual ages, maybe it was shown and I just didn't pay attention. I think Aiden was around 26? So I'm assuming they are around the same , give or take 2-3 years. So these 2 meet up, 1 is dead ("assassinated by the FBI", which is an interesting way to phrase it. I wonder if that will come back on either Rossi or Emily. One giving the order, the other following it.) And Peter and Dana are 'missing', and we have no idea what they look like. Okay, cool.

So they are tech savy enough to operate Voit's network (wasn't that used to be a weather app lol? That whole comment on people posting their racist opinions on that neighbor app, which was featured in ep 3 too, seems like a reference that my not-american brain is not clicking with) and they can put together bombs. It was weird that nobody picked up on the fact that Jade has to be in the park to make that call? Why was everyone just standing in a circle and worrying when they could have sent people to scour the area lol All the while ignoring Voit who was at least smart enough to not run.

Voit

So Voit. This little shit. Every scene he was in I just kept repeating 'you little shit'. Very entertaining bordering on frustrating. His whole demeanor of being like a kid in candy store was funny I'll admit that. That first scene with him going "Dave Dave Dave" took me out. My dude is def dying by the end of the season tho. They can't keep him around for much longer. And I honestly can't tell if him doing morse code was meant to be noticed by the team or not. Because I'm thinking that he is in fact making up the identity of "North Star" and trying to get someone killed? Also, that reveal that he gave the identity of the strike team to Damien? Chef's kiss. He's truly Hannibal Lectering this season. Aaand he has a point with Garcia and Tyler and that whole fiasco last season. I'm glad they are bringing that up because that should have some kind of consequence. (Voit giving them a ship name tho? And talking about carbon footprints? I'm not sure I like him sounding like stan twitter. I mean it's obviously a reference for the fandom to get, but still. It's...a writing choice for sure.)

Garcia/Tyler/Luke

I'm lumping them together because the show is apparently committing to the love triangle bit. Which I'm not that big of a fan of, in general.

This might be an unpopular opinion but the more episodes we have the more I feel like the show doesn't really know what to do with Garcia this season? Like that entire exchange in her office, that ends up with them being back in the bullpen? It was...weird? So Voit smells, okay, cool, did we need to spend this much time on this? It honestly felt like a waste of time that didn't lead anywhere because we are back at the bullpen anyway? Like, narratively, what was the point here?

Luke is still not checking on JJ after throwing a bomb on her, cool lol. Love that he was the one deciphering the morse code tho, and that he dismantled the bomb. Love it when the show remembers character traits.

Tyler remains another frustrating part of this season for me? Everytime he does something where I go "hey cool, that's nice, I kinda like you" he immediately does something else where I go "okay, go fuck yourself now". Like, doing off-the-books work for Emily? Great, cool, love it. And then goes behind her back like it's nothing. So 'Teresa' might be an actual person, but the phrase could also be relevant? Maybe it's another anagram, idk. Either way he's warning someone while keeping Emily in the dark. In conclusion, I don't trust him lol.

Emily

So the framed arrest/mugshots are coming into play, that's great, I'm glad there was a point to that. (Weird choice to drop the name of an actual existing website as the leak but okay). Someone is really out to get her that is connected to this whole ordeal but there's no indication it's either Damian or Jade. Someone also convinced Brian to change face. Also, was he trying to gaslight her? Is that going to be a part of Emily's "breakdown arc" that she is questioning her own sanity? That could be interesting. Or, we are going full scifi and they made him somehow forget his previous alignments. Seems unlikely, but who knows. Anyway, she is on restricted duty and is clearly over it. Just, everything. Great scene by the end. She was going to back to her "spy roots" and moral grayness and it's slowly breaking her. Genuinely think she is one of the most complex characters of this entire show. (Shout out to her speaking Russian too. I know it's just a phrase but it's a nice callback.) Love her bond with Rossi as well. And just all her scenes, great. If there's a character I'm really happy with this season, it's Emily.

Rossi

Honestly not that much to talk about? For the audience this is not the first time he interacts with Voit, but great scenes. He is also losing it, clearly. Maybe I expected a bit more? Confusion, at least? As in, having a hard time differentiating with the real Voit and his halluciVoit?

JJ

I'm biting my fist every time JJ is on screen because I'm just so nervous how that is going to end. She is clearly not okay, everyone is dealing with something and not taking notice of her issues. Loved to see her in charge on the field. She was also the only one competent enough to finally tell someone to shoot the wheels, lmao.

Tara

Tara wasn't given a lot this episode tbh. She was aiding Luke, sure, but this may have been her least active episode. So we have the scene with Rebecca losing her shit, that she's in danger, okay. I mean, they are cute? Wish they would talk more instead, but cute scene at the end, none the less.

I have absolutely no idea where the next episode is going lol. I expected a cliffhanger, we didn't get a cliffhanger. Zero clue as to what comes next.

[chidoroki]

182 Days of TPN - Day 165

Chapter 165: "You Can Fly!"

(I've finally reached that point where those old chapter reviews of mine became consistent, so if there's some deja vu moments with stuff I say from here onwards then I apologize. Might not happen since those were done blindly while I have a perfectly good idea of what happens in the story now, but I'll look back at those posts just in case so I don't become a broken record.)

I find it so adorable that even after so many years, Isabella still thinks of Leslie.

The hatred I feel for Sarah has grown immensely over the past couple months, so of course now I can't help but feel a bit giddy over her being shipped out. Peter eventually comes in with a comment stating that the farm made the decision based on who, between Isabella or Sarah, would be more beneficial to the farms, and with the impressive results Isabella has made during her time as caretaker, she was chosen as the obvious choice to keep around. And rightfully so. Thank heavens.

I know this poor woman just wanted to be free from all this hell and while I certainly don't wish to see Isabella suffer under the farm's rules and restrictions anymore, I love her too much to just see her get killed off, so you gotta stick around for a couple more years to help out the kids honey. It'll be worth it.

As much as I despise the man, I do like the intense shadow Peter gets across him during this panel. It really makes the sinister aura believable with how terrified Isabella looks, and for a woman who's been around death for so long and perfected a strong facade over the years to actually show some kind of fear, that's quite impressive he managed to make her feel that way.

After all this time and now I'm just getting the feeling that Isabella was crying a bit sometime during that panel of her looking at her number and chip implant in the mirror back at GF. Anyways, I know it was intentional for her to look completely scared upon making this deal with Peter here, but I love that it's all just an act as we later find out in ch170. (also, not important but this is my post so it was gonna get mentioned anyway: absolutely thankful that the second season decided to keep Isabella's hair down during this scene. She may have made the deal with one of the GF demons instead of Peter, but I can forgive the anime for that because Isabella just looked so perfect.)

Duh, everything this woman does is impressive. Sure, it's real bummer for those kids who had to be shipped out, but at least we learned during 181.7 that she did lower the frequency of the shipments so a fewer number of children were shipped out all together. It was a whole quality over quantity idea that worked out well so good for her. The less lives lost the better.

I'm certainly repeating myself from somewhere, but the way Isabella was able to successfully rally all the other moms and sisters together in less than a day is just fantastic. Such a power move. I still geek out over it.

Motherly instincts kicking back in (pfft, silly me, as if they ever left. that's genuine concern on her face). It's certainly a painful way to fix a finger but at least she helped!

The switch from "mom" to "caretaker" happens so quick it could give someone whiplash. Honey, I know this is all part of a grand performance but I don't like when you openly treat your precious children as food!

Still wondering how y'all managed to cross the giant cliff in order to sneak into headquarters but whatever works I guess. I'm certain they didn't just cross the bridge since security probably would've been alerted much sooner and I'm not gonna believe they arrived via random hot air balloons like the second season did. Regardless, it was quite a surprise to see Norman armed with a gun but very welcomed. Seeing him in the shelter jacket and pants is a good look for him too.

Favorite panel/moment:

Oh to be lucky enough to receive a hug from such a beautiful woman.

[variousqueerthings]

cool, so did just watch heaven sent, aware that I was going in with some biases (as written out in a long post I kept in my drafts), and yeah it's a good episode, but I definitely think the biases in question stop me from being able to enjoy it Simply As at this point in time. maybe in future when I've rolled twelve's era around in my brain a bit, because I find it much more complicated to rate than eleven's on the whole

what's really good about it of course is that peter capaldi is a fantastic actor, because it all rests on peter capaldi being a fantastic actor, and the setting and energy of it is great. the melancholy, the despair, the lowkey anxiety the whole time -- and of course the music, the music is carrying so much of this episode! I also really like that it ties back into the confession dial (the clue of which is actually given to us in the episode itself, in that the doctor has to confess in order to not die)

bit of kvetching, but actually not so much I think:

I cannot help but see the various m*ffat-isms inherent in it, which in this episode if it were its own thing in another showrunner's era, wouldn't be irritating to me, because they'd balance it out with other Stuff -- the main one is that he's clearly always been much more interested in the doctor versus the companions so it's essentially a long look into various facets of the doctor's mind, after a season where I've felt like Clara might as well not be in most of the episodes for all she moves the plot or is emotionally changed throughout. Clara in some ways is doing in this episode exactly what she's been doing in any other episode and she's dead! she's a figment of the Doctor's mind as he talks to himself and imagines her asking questions!

it's also doing more prophecy, which at least has been hinted at since the beginning of the season (the Hybrid), but ohhh am I tired of m*ffat and prophecies, I wish this episode didn't - in the end - hinge on some kind of prophecy and could stand on its own

there's a lot that's quite unexplained, but I'm willing to see if that's given a bit more in the next episode. how the doctor got into the dial in the first place, what the creature was, why the confessions, why it was structured like that, etc. I'm thinking that'll still come up -- do note that if every past doctor left wet clothes on the wrack to dry, then presumably the first time this happened, that doctor just ran around nude afterwards?

I'm not really bothered one way or another by it being a billion+ years, I did vaguely remember that there was something about that and it ties in quite well on the grand metaphorical scheme of things vis a vis this era, of the doctor constantly pushing themself beyond their limit and totally disregarding their own pain, so the idea that they'd go through the same set of painful actions again and again for billions of years makes sense for this era, and there's questions in there of whether the doctor physically remembers that or just sets it aside, if those billions of years "count" for them or or or etc. is that, for example, part of what fourteen is working through on top of all the other things that lead into fifteen coming into being?

so in the end, good episode -- definitely thinking a looot more about how I feel about it because it's rated so highly, which is kind of a curse it has on it now I've realised. also because swelling m*ffat's ego like that can't be healthy for anyone, and don't think a single good episode in one good season out of five makes me think you're a good showrunner or writer (unless incredibly curbed by writing for someone else)

I'll definitely still put s9 through the rating's system I've got, but I let myself wait for a bit to see how the structure of it came together. might watch hell bent to round off this story (am also btw shocked that part one of a two-parter is rated like that, I'd never be able to see them apart from each other. two-parters belong together in my brain)

I think in the end what was interesting about this episode is noting what one can let go of and what one can't. while watching the recent rtd specials I saw people who were unable to let go of things that I quite readily accepted and worked with (bi-regeneration, fourteen looking like ten, etc), critiqued as something I hope will become deeper in future but isn't a dealbreaker for me (extrajudicial paramilitary force UNIT, will martha jones get closure (but also martha jones in a fifteen episode tho)), or -- once or twice -- simply went "not this," and moved on from ("male presenting") (actually my main hangup of the specials was that fourteen should have regenerated in thirteen's clothes)

with m*ffat I always have a much harder time doing that, because I simply haven't got a lot of faith in him as a showrunner or a writer that's going to give decent pay-off in the end because I know from experience that he frequently does not give decent pay-off in the end he is famous for sucking at that, and his recurring quirks that I don't like become really irksome as consequence

this not to say I didn't like this episode -- I really did. but I assume I'll like it a lot more when I can structure twelve's era in a way that I enjoy more than I have done parts of it, so that the emotional core lands more strongly than it could do at present time. I also would never call an episode that is solely about the doctor "the best episode of all time." that focus will always be too self-indulgent, ungrounded, and to the left of what I personally like in the show, I imagine

but, yeah, I could happily watch peter capaldi monologuing for hours of course I could

[papirouge]

what is it about your posts that makes people turn their eyeballs and brains off and not read them before sending you some stupid reply lmao. your post about trauma wasn't even saying whatever those dudes thought it said; every now and again I forget people who can't read use tumblr and then stuff like that slaps me back into reality. tragic

anyway Papi, hope you're doing well, wish people would chill out before choosing to try and get into some stupid internet argument with you :v

jejskwkzififi

The same thing happened on my post dunking on white conservative pitting minorities against each other. My regular followers 'got it' and liked it, but shortly after a whole flock of rando took offense of it for whatever reason and wouldn't stop shoving their unasked opinion💀

I really wish Tumblr had a followers/mutual only reblogs because I refuse to have to deal with idiots misconstructing my takes bc of whatever they project onto it.

They did the same with the post you're talking about. Like yeah you might disagree and think psychology is a big dal, good for you. But their behavior just proved my point even further and that this whole 'i need to reflect on my trauma uwu' thing I the proof that psychology makes people unecessary self centered and emotionally immature. You guys are spending YEARS in therapy yet can't deal with a blog post hurting your feefees.... 🥴

Acknowledging your trauma is one thing and does help, but you actual have to put it up to JESUS instead of rehashing it for years to a psychiatrist you're not even sure is Christian. Plentiful of biblical characters did messed up thing that would possibly scar them for life (both Moses and David assassinated a man, Paul oppressed Christians before becoming one himself, Peter had to deal with the guilt of betraying Jesus to his death, etc.) and yet God still assigned to them ministries where they had to get over themselves and actively work for the Lord and for others. They didn't spend years whining and complaining about their past and using it as an excuse for their shortcomings. Apostleship is a very selfless ministry.

God is good and always give a time for us to mourn and weep, but once it done, we have to get back on our feet and WORK. Lord provided food & water to Elie during his exile when he was begging to die 💀 and then he went on 40 days in the desert... Do you think he got access to therapy in the desert to overcome his suicidal thoughts?

Stop looking at the past and stick to the present and how we can be useful for the Lord. Modern psychology makes us self centered and stuck in the past, and that's the opposite of what God wants from us. He told Lot to not turn back. It's a very strong symbolism that isn't compatible with past obsessed trauma psychology.

[kitausuret]

2022 Year in Review

Tagged by the delightful @seek--rest .

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 19 new pieces, and 3 chapters updated on Dust to Dust.

2. Word count this year: 63,201 (wow!), with 17,337 of those words having been added to Dust to Dust.

3. Fandoms I wrote for: Venom (comics), Marvel 616, MC2 (Marvel), Spider-Man (comicsverse), Fantastic Four (comicsverse), Carnage (comics), Scarlet Witch (comic), Venom (movies)

4. Pairings: - Eddie Brock/Flash Thompson/Venom Symbiote - Peter Parker/Mary Jane Watson - Flash Thompson/Venom Symbiote - Eddie Brock/Venom Symbiote - Dan Lewis/Anne Weying/Venom Symbiote/Eddie Brock ...and then a bunch of platonic pairings as well! But we would be here all day for that.

5. Stories with the most... (note: I am excluding DTD since that has been a multi-year project) Kudos: Don't Misread the Signs (D.A.V.E.) - 85 Bookmarks: Don't Misread the Signs (D.A.V.E.) - 21 Comment Threads: Complicate Me, Elevate Me (Symbiot3) - 8 Word Count: Finding the Light Again (Symbrock, VenomFlash, Symbiot3) - 5,206

6. Work I'm most proud of... Honestly? Dust to Dust is the obvious answer, because any progress I make on it, I consider an accomplishment... but I'm really, stupidly happy with how "Anywhere but Here" (Eddie Brock | Venom & Mary Jane Watson, set during Maximum Carnage) turned out. MJ is such a complicated character with such a long, long, long history behind her and I'd wanted to address the friction between her and Venom for an awfully long time. As you can see by the bottom (being shameless here) I was happy enough with it that I wanted some art, and @maydayparkers was kind enough to indulge me.

7. Work I'm least proud of: Kind of an odd question? I'm proud of everything I wrote this year, haha, but hmmm I wish I'd done more research on the Fantastic Four comics of the era before writing "A Day at the Park". I felt pretty unsure going into writing it, because I really wanted to write the time that the Venom Symbiote was in the custody of the F4 but I didn't want to read the Byrne F4 run... still, it's not like me to write something in an era where I'm largely winging it. I'm glad the fic was well-received regardless, I loved writing ReedSue (and Franklin!).

8. A favorite review I received: Let me tell you something: I got not one but two really heartfelt comments on "The Look of You" (symbiot3, a focus on Eddie), which is a fic I was a little nervous about posting but I'm so glad I did. I also got some beautiful art done by my friend Nex (my commission is the second picture in the link), which you can see also at the bottom of the fic.

@guessimabasicnerdgirlnow also left me these really sweet words:

Aww, this is beautiful. We don’t see fictional men with body image issues often, but this fits Eddie very well, he’s very proud of those muscles so it’s easy to imagine that the idea of getting fat would bother him. Good thing he has two loving partners that are there for him to help him accept this new shape and understand that it is healthy. (And who also helped him reach this healthy state in first place). Ah, and isn’t this setting a fan’s perfect fantasy: them all happy and living in decent conditions, getting healthier, loving and supporting one another? 🥺

I also had a close friend reach out to me after reading the fic to tell me how much it meant to her, and that she really enjoyed seeing a story where weight gain and body shape change were portrayed as a positive thing. In fact I'm getting a little choked up and teary just thinking about what she said because it really, really touched me.

Like... a lot of what I write is just kind of silly, self-indulgent stuff. Or fluff. Or smut. But this is one that was really important to me.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard: Uuuuhhh gosh. I burned myself out pretty hard after Symbruary, but I managed to get "Complicate Me, Elevate Me" out as my 100th fic after a DTD update. It's probably my favorite Symbiot3 smutfic that I've written so far. Porn with feelings! It took me forEVER to finish, though, especially given that I'd started it back in February.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you: When I was trying to come up with ideas for Comics Scarlet Witch Week, which eventually led to "What Binds Us Together", I was stunned to discover that Victoria and Wanda had canon interactions together. I guess I surprised myself with how much I enjoyed writing them together, to the point where I'm excited to write them in a much larger piece for this year. I love... women.... 💋

I also created an attorney OC for Dust to Dust Chs. 12-13 that I got really weirdly attached to LOL. Jason Tolliver, you deserve better than what I put you through.

11. A favorite excerpt of your writing: From "Stranger in a Strange Land" (Andi Benton | Mania & April Parker), which I wrote for Symbruary Day 1:

Her expression wavered. For a second, it looked like April was going to break down, but all at once, her whole face set. She ground her teeth and shoved past Andi. “You’re wrong. I’m not like any scenario you’ve ever known.”  She watched April keep going. And then- “Mania was made in a lab.” April stopped.  “My… my symbiote. It - she was made in a lab. Just a piece of the Venom symbiote. A copy.” Andi stepped closer, uncertain at first, but her voice growing clearer as she went on. “For the longest time, she didn’t know who she was, or how to feel, or where she belonged - even getting attached to me, it was a mistake. She was alone, and scared, and all she’d ever known her whole life was anger and hatred.”

12. How did you grow as a writer this year: I expanded into quite a few more pairings! I wrote my first Parksborn fic, I wrote a fic focused just on Tarna and her partner from Venom: Space Knight, my first proper PeterMJ fic, and my first fic with Jubulile as Toxin's host. I also wrote my first fic with Wanda that I've truly felt proud of (sorry, Wavelengths) with "What Binds Us Together".

13. How do you hope to grow next year: Honestly, I want to continue expanding the characters and pairings I write about. I want to explore a wider variety of characters - like honestly. I want to write more women. That might sound silly but it's true! I just need to get some of my ideas actually into Fic Form instead of just rolling them around in my head.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year: Oh gosh oh gosh. There are so many people I could tag here. @amaronith, always, for never letting DTD die and for always supporting my symbiot3 works. @softgrungeprophet for the HOURS of conversation about PeterFlash and HarryFlash and Flash Generally Speaking. @theopolis for accidentally giving DTD a B plot by getting me into Harry (like, REALLY getting me into Harry). @seek--rest for her insight on fic stuff and encouraging me to go outside my comfort zone. The 3 artists I commissioned for works based on my fics. @decaffeinatedparadisemaker for just being an absolutely delightful person to get to know and I love talking to him about fic stuff. @oliveroctavius for also giving me Harry brain worms but in a different way. Possibly a worse way. I have a WIP inspired by one of his pieces, it's.. it's definitely something lol.

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year: There's a character in one of my fics named after one of my co-workers. That's all I'm gonna say!

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers: Don't read comics or you will get way more ideas than you will know what to do with. Also don't read comics intending to learn more about one ship because you'll just end up completely fixated on a different ship and before you know it you've got a high school au with a meetcute between a football player and a marching band pit member and also it's based on the Gwen Stacy mini.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year: OBVIOUSLY I'm looking forward to getting back to Dust to Dust. Hopefully this weekend I'll finish the New Year's Eve Coffee Bean Gang fic I meant to finish.. uh.. last weekend. But otherwise, there are a tooooon of WIPs in the most recent entries of the asked and answered tag. Have fun!

Here's a little snip from the NYE fic though:

“Well, I hope that Petey-o gets here before the ball drops,” Mary Jane said. She did a little spin, sending her sequined skater skirt twirling around her hips before she stopped and draped her arms over Gwen’s shoulders. She leaned in with a wide grin. “Or else I’m going to get the first kiss of the new year from Miss Gwendolyn.” Gwen flushed bright pink and turned to dislodge her friend’s arms. “Now that’s ridiculous. Can you imagine all those people down in Times Square, just… just kissing strangers? All because of, what, the time of the year? Getting twenty dollar hats and stupid novelty sunglasses you can only wear for one day, tourist madness, all night cleanup for—”

Me: it's a PeterFlash fic Also Me: it's an Everyone fic

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read: Not sure who hasn't done this, but if you'd like to, you definitely should go for it! Or even just answer the questions you want, I'm not your boss.

[reverie-starlight]

THANK YOU FOR TAGGING ME AND I'M SO SORRY I DIDN'T SEE IT SOONER!!! this was sm fun <333 under the cut bc I don't know how to shut up :D

started writing: so I think I originally tried to write fanfiction when I was like... 11? it was literally handwritten in a notebook I've now lost and it was a Heroes of Olympus fanfic with an OC? I think? but oh man, I've been an x-reader girl from the very beginning. I started posting on wattpad when I was 12 and it was a book of x-reader fics for this one band I really liked back then... I will NOT be naming names. I did that alongside x-reader fics for PJO/HoO and Peter Parker for about 3 ish years before only sticking to fictional characters bc once I turned 15 I personally felt uncomfy writing real person fics. and I've been writing for haikyuu/anime characters in general since I was 16!

started blogging: I started my blog in 2022 as a little bday gift to myself when I turned 18 (lol silly gift maybe, but I had been going back and forth on whether or not I should- I'm so glad I did). I had been stalking a ton of blogs without an account for a whileee for some characters and I finally decided to move my haikyuu drafts from wattpad over here and see how they'd do. and here we are!

followers: I have about 1.2k right now which is INSANE to me bc I've neverrr had that many people enjoy my writing. even if like. half of you are bots, I'm still so grateful for everyone <333

communication: I LOVEEEE bugging my mutuals!! I do worry that I'm too much sometimes, or that I get a little overexcited abt sharing ideas and then I draw back a bit (and it's why I'm shy abt messaging compared to sending an ask). I wish I got more asks in general abt literally anything just bc I love interactions/making friends (even tho I'm extremely shy offline LOL)

likes: I prefer reblogs/comments if I'm being honest, but likes mean a lot too!!

for some reason my sakusa fics always do really well in the likes department, but it does kind of frustrate me when the like/reblog ratio is insanely disproportionate. I think it's cause I just crave interaction/like knowing people do actually enjoy what I put out and why. I feel like it helps me grow as a writer if I understand what translated well, what people focused on, etc.

I always leave a like and reblog a fic I loved with some thoughts on it/how it made me feel, and so do my mutuals & most other authors. I never ever ever expect that from anyone, and I do so so so appreciate any interaction, but I just prefer the other stuff a little more!

requests: formal requests are closed bc I feel bad not getting to them in a timely manner, and I don't always have the time or inspiration/motivation to do that. however if someone sends in a cute idea just for funsies I might end up writing it!!

writing: hmmm I'm always trying to improve my writing, which is why in my little author's note sections of fics I put out, you'll sometimes see me apologizing for switching up the format/trying something new! honestly my writing rn isn't where I want it to be, it feels a bit lackluster and kind of like it's been getting worse??? but we keep moving. sometimes I'll write a line that I personally think is soooo good and I'm so proud of it, but then I'll hate the rest of the fic bc it feels flat in comparison.

I feel like I do my best writing either really early in the morning or super late at night. maybe bc they're times that I don't need to focus on anything else?

I'm very big on characterization. I'll usually have the character wiki open on the personality section, even for characters I'm not new to writing, bc I want to make sure it feels like them. the only character I haven't done this for is kuroo. but I've been comfortable writing him from the very beginning of my haikyuu obsession. I always try to imagine beforehand what a speific character would say, and I alter the lines a million times before it feels right. the hardest character for me to write rn is kaiser I think, just bc I haven't read the manga lol. mammon is also hard bc I tend to write him a bit more self-indulgently than how he is in canon. I prefer lovey-dovey, comfortable with his emotions and expressing them mammon.

overall I'm really proud of how far I've come with writing!! It is something I'd like to do professionally one day, so fingers crossed that happens!! there are a few fics I'm especially proud of on my blog, and while a couple of them ended up doing waaayyyy better than I thought (cough cough, my "MC returning to the present" fics for obey me), I like to think of these ones as hidden gems :)

one of them is this fic that was like, sooo insanely cathartic for me to write bc I was literally experiencing the request in real time!! it's an akaashi x reader and I absolutely adore it.

here it is if you're interested!! I'm not a psychology major for nothing LMFAO.

this one's not a hidden gem, but that one atsumu fic I did, "beautiful liar"? one of my absolute favourite fics ever, I was SO excited to post it, I changed around the scheduled date like twice lol. in general I also love my kuroo fics, I feel like writing him comes so naturally to me.

I'm not big on angst at all, I rarely ever read it, and I actually find I'm more sensitive to angst with certain characters (aka kuroo. i'm not kidding, I'm not sure why but anything angsty with him literally pains me. I read the galaxy is endless in 2021 and literally couldn't watch any nekoma episodes for like a week bc I was so upset). Ironically, angst is one of my strong suits when it comes to writing! I just prefer writing fluff bc it's not so mentally draining. I have an angsty (ish. it's hurt/comfort-esque.) mammon fic that I'm hoping to post on saturday that I tried to post last year but couldn't bc I didn't have the energy to finish it on time. angst is so draining for me!!!

I do have a smut blog, though! I don't talk abt it on this blog bc it's SFW and I want the two to be kept separate, but the link is in my pinned post!! there's some kuroo and suna on there already lol.

and if you couldn't tell, I'm wordy. I need to work on that in my fics. and apparently every aspect of written communication. I tend to over explain myself (I was literally about to explain why and then I realized I was doing it again).

tagging (no pressure): @tetzoro @6okuto @ryomance @emmyrosee and anyone else who wants to!! feel free to join in if you'd like :3

Behind the scenes of a Tumblr Writer - Tag Game

Hey there, I love behind the scenes and since this is something that's rarely talked about, let me start the chain... if you feel uncomfortable with a question, just skip it. You can add some if you want as well.

Started writing: I wrote my first Harry Potter fanfic at age 10. Started posting around 15,16 years old. I'm now 31, so...

Started blogging: I started on a German fanfiction site around 2010/11 I think. Might have been earlier too, but back then I was mostly reading, no posting. I really started when I got into One Direction (very late, tbh)

Followers: Currently at 961, which is wild to me. I don't even know that many people IRL. I convince myself that half of them are bots tbh, so I don't freak out all the time.

Communication: The people I talk to regularly are: a few writers who answered after I constantly reblogged and commented on their works and a few people who commented and reblogged my work. Writing and blogging on here can be pretty lonely, depending on your personality and the time you're active (I'm from Europe and a lot of my followers seem to be living in Northern America, so there's the Timezone thing) ... And I found that the best way to strike a conversation is to reblog, comment, and to not be shy. I do wish I got more asks, though....

Likes: I actually filter them out. I have 793 original posts up at the moment. It doesn't give me anything to know how many likes a fic has other than to tell me which characters are liked more than others or maybe that one fic does especially well. My activity only shows me comments, asks, reblogs with tags, and answers to my own asks. I live for the tags and the comments.

Requests: I love talking to people about ideas. That's how I started the plotbunny game because I have so many ideas and so little time. And sometimes an idea just doesn't want to be written out fully. Requests are fun because YAY, I get some mail... but then I freak out because I don't really know how to write this NOW and then I freak out because it's been a week already, two weeks, wait, two months? I'd rather have suggestions where people tell me vague things like "I'd love to read something about this side character" or "Have you ever considered this character with a soulmate trope"? because then I don't have the feeling of failing the request when I write it a little bit differently.

Writing: I am a fast writer. I know that's one of my talents. I can churn out a oneshot of 1k words in less than an hour. People read slower than I write. That can suck sometimes because you've just posted this and you want to know what people are thinking but they're not as fast as you are. I do have a lot of ideas. I want to write constantly but my brain doesn't always want to. I am trying to respect that.

There are also certain things that I just feel wrong writing. I cannot write anything suggestive (I also don't like reading it) and everything past that gives me panic attacks. I can hardly write mean characters and jealousy feels so wrong to me that I cannot write it. I've also overdone it with the soulmark trope and now I feel like everything I write about it feels lifeless.

I write best in the mornings before going to work, but I don't have much time there. I don't need special music (but it helps), but I need to have at least some energy left and at best, no distractions. But I have been writing for over 20 years, so I will say experience helps a lot.

Tagging: @revasserium @shoulmate @lemurzsquad @screamin-abt-haikyuu @toomanygoldfish @satorisoup @emmyrosee @reverie-starlight @alienaiver and @writingsofanomnivore and everyone else who wants to join

[vivitalks]

omg i didn't see that you did a writer's ask game! hopefully it's not too late to send asks? if not, may i ask 1, 7, 12, 15, & 5 about "blow a kiss to concern"? thank youuu 💙

i reblog a writer's game and then don't answer this ask for several days SORRY! love you here i am now let's go

1. What fic of yours would you recommend to someone who had never read any of your work? (In other words, what do you think is the best introduction to your fics?) this is a tough question because i write in a lot of different fandoms. however, i am going to give two answers. one is the stydia fic blow a kiss to concern (which will be discussed later) because it has a lot of tropes i enjoy - driving, flirting, canon compliance, fluff with some angst, all the good stuff. the second is my kate bishop & peter parker series young & not too wise which has two fics - one of kate and peter meeting before the events of the hawkeye show, and one of them meeting right after. one thing i really enjoy doing is taking two characters who haven't really met or interacted but have the grounds for a fascinating interaction to meet and talk. so like, post-nwh peter has all this trauma from being a superhero, and pre-hawkeye kate is all starry-eyed wanting to be a superhero, and i loved the idea of those two perspectives meeting, two young new yorkers with such different life experiences. i do this kind of pseudo-crossover a lot and it's always so much fun.

7. Any worldbuilding you’re particularly proud of? i don't worldbuild that often. i am a big big fan of writing things that are canon compliant or very slightly canon divergent (one character lives instead of dies, a relationship is broken up instead of still together, that kind of thing) where the broader universe is still intact, because i feel like in fictional media, part of what's so fun and interesting about writing the characters is dealing with the shit they've gone through and experiences they've had as a result of the universe they exist in.

that being said, i did a smidge of worldbuilding (really more like world-expanding) for my bellarke fic taking the world off your shoulders, particularly the couple of grounder villages they wind up in, and that was fun. the 100 established this bit of canon where only the warrior grounders speak english but then we didn't get a lot of opportunities to see the communities of non-warrior grounders who didn't speak english at all, so i especially liked dipping my toes into sonia's village and exploring a community of people who aren't involved at all in the grounder violence/war and are just peaceful and self-sustaining

12. Are there any tropes you used to dislike but have grown on you? mmmm i'm thinking about it but can't come up with any. i think i've probably gotten to like more rarepairs, but that's not a trope (maybe just an influence of hanging out with you lol).

15. What’s your favorite AU that you’ve written? like i said before i don't write a lot of AUs outside of your garden-variety canon divergence, so my options for answers here are limited. i guess my favorite AU is the whole post-age of ultron series i wrote where everything is the same except that pietro lives (bc seriously wtf was that). the series is called pietro lives 'verse but it wound up becoming an entirely clint-barton-centric series and i apologize for nothing.

5. What do you wish someone would ask you about blow a kiss to concern? Answer it now! "hey raviv, what's so special about driving stick shift?" look. you'll never know. you'll never understand until you're driving a bunch of foreigners from literally any other country other than america and they suddenly go, "wait is this a manual?" and you get to very nonchalantly say "yeah it is." you just can't know the level of smug pride you get to experience when people are impressed with you for something as simple as that.

also, driving stick is an even more involved way to do the already-hella-romanticizeable act of driving, and in my experience, it is frustrating as SHIT to learn. and like, stiles loves his fucking car so fucking much. the only other person we ever see drive that car is scott (i think?), most likely because it's not something most people can do, but also because scott is like a brother to him, one of the people he loves the most in the entire world. it's a huge act of trust for stiles to let someone else drive his car. so the idea that there's a skill lydia doesn't have but wants, and only stiles can realistically teach her because he's the only one with both the know-how and the actual car to teach her with is just. very charming in its potential. plus, learning stick at ALL is really hard and it's a testament to the relationship between stiles and lydia that she isn't constantly in tears, because like. he completely believes she can do it, and she completely trusts him to teach her. I JUST THINK THEY'RE NEAT

ask me a question for fic writers!

[sparklefics]

Cuddles & Cocoa Pt 2

For Kathie’s @pellucid-constellations writing challenge. #loveletterswritingchallenge

Chubby!College!Bucky & F!Reader

WC: 4k

Warnings: Hurt comfort, loss, grief, depression, overall sadness, therapy.

Prompts were: "I take it you’re here cause you read my letter." & "I'm sitting here, with this stupid pen in my hand, and damn I can't believe you have me writing right now."

A/N: So I divided the story in 2 parts because I wanted to post it for Valentine's Day but only had half the story done... so here is the other half. Enjoy.

This is mostly fluff. If you haven't read part 1 click ➡[HERE]

You lay in bed wearing one of Bucky’s old sweatshirts you kept from that one time he loaned it to you, while he was in his undershirt and boxers. You give Bucky your letter, the light in your bedroom is dim but it’s enough to see. He grabs it and starts reading, his face reflects how much he’s enjoying it. He smiles and chuckles, his cheeks get flushed and you know when he gets to the end of the letter because he gasps and his eyes look like they’re about to pop out.

My Cuddlebug,

I hate to break it to you but I'm familiar with how the correspondence works.

Your grandma is one wise lady. I hope I get to meet her soon.

Your letter was beautiful and so touching.

I'll be brief with mine. I would hate for you to fall asleep reading this. 😉 *wink wink*

Honestly I plan on saying all of this to your face, but I'm writing it down just in case I forget something. Besides, I wanted you to have a love letter too.

I must confess… I was a bit clueless about my feelings for you up until a couple of days ago when my old lab partner Peter asked me out on a date. That made me feel so confused because my immediate response was a rotound no. Then he apologized for ‘getting in between us’.

Nat did her psych mumbo jumbo on me, and in her professional opinion she said that I wanted you and I to be friends so much that I buried my feelings so deep I didn’t even know they existed.

You are my friend, my sweet incredible, soft, handsome, sexy best friend. Yes, I mean sexy, even if you don’t think so after your little weight gain. SEXY HOT STUFF! I plan on telling you every single day how sexy I think you are, don’t worry the way I feel about you has nothing to do with how you look— that’s a plus.

Would you believe me if I said I didn't know Steve set us up?

Most stuff flies up off the top of my head.

For someone who claims to be so in tune with her emotions, you'd think I'd be able to tell when I'm falling for someone...

I do not wish to miss out on what we could be.

To be clear I FUCKING WANT TO DATE YOU TOO.

XOXO Your clueless girl,

Y/N

P.S. Not that it's a competition but I'm totally gonna one up you and tell you I love you. XOXO

“Sweets!” He peppers your face with kisses momentarily pausing to place the letter on the nightstand then focusing back on you. Those gorgeous blue eyes of his you could stare at them for hours.

They say eyes are the windows to the soul and it couldn’t be more true. You know Bucky feels the same way about you before he even opens his mouth to say anything because you see it in his eyes. There’s a sparkle there and a shine that hasn’t been there in a while, it’s happiness.

“I love you too. Can’t believe you said it first.”

“Technically you said it first, I wrote it down.”

“Smart ass.”

You stay wrapped up in each other’s arms while telling stories about times when you couldn’t hide your feelings for each other very well, it’s mostly Bucky talking. He tells you about that time in the summer when you dragged him out of the apartment to join you and your group of friends at the beach. Apparently the sight of you in a swimsuit was enough to give him a boner, you were playing volleyball with Nat and well things were bouncing, skin was showing and it was really hot that day at the beach. Sam and Steve were building a sand castle. Steve was building the castle, Sam just wanted to dig a hole. And that’s how Bucky ended up buried with sand up to his shoulders.

“Oh…I thought maybe you were uncomfortable being at the beach, you never even took off your shirt.”

“Yeah, I let everyone think that. I thought it was a better hiding place for my boner. I didn’t want anyone, more specifically you, to know. It was so inappropriate.” Bucky whines as he buries his face in your neck in shame.

“I wish I had an embarrassing story like yours.” You giggle and feel Bucky’s smile against your neck.

“You do.”

“Do I now?”

“Yep, and it’s recent too.” He wiggles his eyebrows at you smugly. “It was on new year’s at the cabin. We went to bed…you went directly to my room, to my bed, wearing—look at that,” he pulls on your sweatshirt, “wearing exactly this. You settled in and snuggled up to me and only then did you fall asleep.” You look like you’re gonna interject but he doesn’t let you. “Here comes the good part. In the middle of the night you rolled off then you said, and I quote, ‘Cuddlebug, you’re so far away’ and pulled me close. You’d never done that before. It was really cute. For a minute there it felt like we were really a couple.”

“Well now that we are really a couple you don’t have to hold back on your affections.” You smile up at him and he smiles back, dropping a kiss to your forehead.

You place your hands on both sides of his face, hold him in place and kiss his now visible chin dimple. “I’d forgotten about this.”

“So you’re not mad that I shaved?”

“Not all cause now I get to see your pretty face and these cute little moles. I’ve missed your face, Buck.” You say as you pepper his face with kisses. “You look like a Disney prince.”

“Thank you, then I guess that’s fitting considering that you look like a princess all the time.”

__________________________________

You like to think that you know Bucky, hell, you know each other so well you thought that the getting to know each other phase of a relationship with him would be, for lack of a better word, boring. It's very surprising to keep learning so much about each other.

Like you learn how protective Bucky actually is of his little sister. And how he's always been closer with his grandparents than his own parents. Bucky learns all kinds of little details like if you sleep on your left side you snore. He learns how to care for his hair, how to style it, who knew there were more hair products than just shampoo and conditioner--same with hairbrushes. He learns that you actually love cuddling all the time, you're on him like a koala, and he hadn't noticed before just how much of a tactile person you really are.

Bucky loves it.

When spring break rolls around you're both looking forward to some down time. Senior year of college has proven to be exhausting. Bucky wanted to make the most of your free time and take you to meet his grandma but you were unable because his little sister threw a wrench in his plans.

Rebecca is funny and snarky, and she resembles Bucky with the striking blue eyes and dark hair.

"Surprise!" She pushed open the door on Bucky's bedroom without knocking, interrupting you and Bucky's late morning cuddle session that had turned into a makeout session.

Rebecca shrieked as did you, Bucky just about cursed her out. "Rikki! What the hell are you doing here?"

Rebecca continued screaming, "Aaaaaah!"

"Rikki, get out!!" Bucky threw a pillow at her and she stopped screaming and ran out the room shutting the door behind her.

Bucky starts chuckling into your neck, "That's Rebecca."

You moved past your embarrassment and got dressed to go have lunch with Bucky's sister. As it turned out Rebecca had sneaked off into the city. "You did what?!"

"Relax, Bucky. It's just a train ride." She brushed it off.

"Rebecca! You can't come out to the city by yourself." Bucky insisted.

"Jamie, don't go all caveman." You interject and Rebecca smiles at you.

"Yes, thank you. Listen to your girlfriend, Jamie." She sticks out her tongue at her brother.

"Rebecca, sadly your brother does have a point. It's dangerous to be wandering alone in the city, especially for a young woman. It sucks but that's how it is."

"I just wanted to crash a college party."

"Rikki, you'll be here in a couple of months." Bucky tries to reason with her.

"I know. I just wanted to do something fun for once. It's my senior year of high school, the most adventurous thing I've done is take the subway by myself."

There's a beat of silence and a tense stare down between the Barnes siblings when you decide to intervene. "Well, what if we take your sister to a party for a little bit?"

Rebecca pouts and gives Bucky a look you're too familiar with, the puppy eyes. Oh! That's just not fair! She's not giving you 'the eyes' but they're working on you, not on Bucky though.

"Two hours. You don't leave our sights and we're taking you home tomorrow."

The stare down continues, "You'll let me drink at least?"

"No."

"Oh Bucky, come on. She'll be with us the whole time." You try to advocate for Rebecca. She'll soon be off to college. She might as well learn how to handle her alcohol. You arch your eyebrow and give Bucky 'the eyes'. Rebecca sits there in awe of you and how Bucky bends to your will, it's impressive.

"Fine. One hour, two drinks but you don't leave my sight."

_____________________________________________________

To Bucky's delight his sister hated the party and the drinks, he let her try a bit of everything from beer and cocktails to straight up liquor. Then you all went home to your apartment, with Nat being gone with her girlfriend you had room to host Rebecca.

You all take turns for the shower, while Bucky is in there you let Rebecca have a bit of wine and she likes it. So you give her a crash course on drinking wine. You tell her to never drink on an empty stomach and always drink water in between glasses of wine to avoid hangovers--no chugging the wine either.

Bucky joins you and his sister in the living room, already scowling and disapproving of you two drinking. Rebecca makes sure to point out Bucky lost his edge, in a good way, he is less strict and she thinks it’s because of you.

Next day Bucky gets the breakfast and you all get ready to go back to Bucky’s parents’ house. Rebecca talks nonstop on the train ride over and the siblings get their story straight. They were planning to tell their parents that Bucky had met Rebecca halfway and she didn’t wander around the city by herself.

His parents are nice, Winnie and George Barnes are a duo of busy successful lawyers. You know Bucky is not as close with them as he is with his grandma but that doesn’t mean that this is not important to him. You’re not the first girl he’s brought home but he’s certain you’re the last one.

During dinner Winnie and George cross examine you, asking about anything and everything. They want to know what kind of person you are. You’re not offended by any of it, you know your mom is gonna be ten times worse when you take Bucky to meet her. Bucky’s parents are hard to read but your intuition tells you that they like you. If they weren’t interested then they wouldn’t have asked all those questions, plus you got to show off how smart you are. Bucky looked particularly proud of you for keeping up with the interrogation.

After dinner Bucky gives you a grand tour of his childhood home. It’s no mansion but it’s big and nice enough to know his parents have money. Everything is nice and clean, but you can tell it’s lived in from the scratches on the doorways where Rebecca and Bucky measured their height. There’s a lot of photos in the living room varying from his parents wedding day to Bucky’s high school graduation. There are some sweet kid pictures with Bucky, Steve and a toothless Rebecca. Bucky was a chubby child but his smile and eyes still held the same sparkle you know and love.

“Aww!” You sigh then feel Bucky’s arms circle your waist from behind as he buries his face in your neck.

Another picture catches your eye, a handsome soldier in his uniform. You don’t hesitate to pick up the frame. “Is this…?”

“Hmhm. Sergeant James Barnes of the 107th.”

“Wow. You look just like him.” You lean back and crane your neck to press your lips to his cheek.

“It’s a shame you never got to meet him.”

“I know, but I got the next best thing. You.”

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

____________________________________________________________________

After school is finally over Bucky takes you to meet his grandma. He wanted to make the introduction before graduation, so here you are on a sunday afternoon with a bouquet of white and pink lilies on a Brooklyn bound R train. This time you are nervous and Bucky can tell.

After knocking on the door to his grandma's place He gives you a last minute pep talk to calm your nerves. He grabs your face in both of his hands and presses his lips to yours in a tender kiss, "You have nothing to be nervous about. Grandma is going to love you." moves his lips to your forehead.

The door opens when Bucky still has his lips pressed to your forehead.

"James!"

"Bubbe." Bucky leaves your side to embrace his grandma in a hug, her petite frame looks tiny in comparison to Bucky's. "This is my girl, Y/n. Sweets, this is my grandmother Elizabeth."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, ma'am." You smile while handing her the flowers.

"My favorites! I like you already, come on in lovebirds."

That afternoon is so enlightening, his grandma tells you a lot of stories about Bucky and Steve getting in trouble as teenagers. Steve had a knack of picking fights with bullies, a trait he got from his own grandfather Grant. Steve and Bucky's grandfathers served together in the 107th. When they came back from the war they kept in touch, eventually Grant and his wife relocated from Paramus, New Jersey to Brooklyn to be near their friends.

And that's how Steve and Bucky came to be best friends, they literally grew up together. His grandma brought out a lot of pictures including some of Steve's grandpa from his time in the military. Steve also looks a lot like his grandpa except he's skinnier.

Grandma Elizabeth, Ellie, she insisted you call her that, asks a lot of questions about your relationship with Bucky. "You two are so sweet together. Thank you for making my boy so happy."

"Bubbe!" Bucky groans in embarrassment but his grandma is not having it.

"Hush, boy. I swear this is the happiest I've seen him in a long while, he had such a hard time after my James passed."

"I know, I'm so very sorry for your loss. He seemed like a great man."

Ellie excuses herself to go get some plates ready. A second after she leaves she pops her head back to the living room, "Jamie, dear, could you help me get the plates down? I want to use my good china."

"Sure, Bubbe." Bucky says and hands you the photo album he'd been holding.

You stay in the living room flipping through the photo album while Bucky helps his grandma in the kitchen.

__________________________________________________

Bucky gets the plates down from the highest shelf.

"Your granda put those up there. I haven't used them in a long time. Give them a rinse, dear."

"Okay." Bucky rolls up his sleeves and gets to work. "Hey, Bubbe...can I ask you something?"

"Yes, honey."

"Are you okay, being here alone in this apartment? I'm only asking because, well, you're getting older and I don't want you to be alone. After graduation, I plan to stay in the city. I want to be near you and keep an eye out for Rikki."

"I'm fine here, dear, though I would love it if you could visit more often. Now that I've got you here I have to tell you something, I already talked this out with Georgie and Winnie, I decided to make some changes to my will."

Bucky tenses up with the subject but carries on to drying the dishes. "Bubbe, please I just started making peace with Grandpa, I don't wanna think about losing you too."

"It's just paper work, Jamie. I'm leaving the apartment for Rikki and the cabin upstate is yours. I figured Rikki would want to stay near the city, and once your girl starts showing you'll--"

"Bubbe!" He turns around to face his grandma, "Lemme stop you right there, I told you, no grandbabies until after I'm married. Y/N and I have only been together for like three months now."

She uncrosses her arms and walks closer, "Well, hurry up then. I want to be around my grandbabies for as long as possible." She gauges his reaction and smirks, "Jamie...you're really serious about this girl. I just asked you for grandbabies and you essentially said 'not yet'."

"Well," Bucky rubs the back of his neck nervously, "I mean yeah. She's definitely the one."

His grandma grabs his face and squishes his cheeks with a giant smile of her own. "I'm so proud of you. Jamie, your grandpa would be proud. She's a lovely girl and a great addition to the family."

"Thanks, Bubbe."

"Here, I want you to have this." She removes the ring from her finger and places it in Bucky's hand, "No pressure on the babies."

______________________________________________________

You and Bucky take a long walk home, opting for watching the sunset over the Brooklyn Bridge. Halfway through the bridge Bucky starts up the conversation by telling you how you charmed his grandma. He asks you about meeting your family and what that's going to be like.

"I don't mean to pressure you to introduce me, if you're not ready for that I understand. I'm just curious."

"I'm definitely ready, it's just that we're not as open or affectionate with each other. It took us a long time, years, to even be able to sit down and talk about my father, our loss." You explain. "We're all so different, you'll understand when you meet them." You describe in detail your family's dynamic. Like your mom, she can be a bit scary and may even come off as judgemental. You're expecting her to be skeptical, after all, Bucky is the first guy you've brought home. "You're the first guy I ever got this far with, meeting the parents, getting this close is really serious to me."

That last bit has Bucky reaching for his pocket, his grandma's ring suddenly burning a hole in his pants. "You think they'll like me?"

"Probably. Mom can be scary and hard to read. My sister, nosey as fuck, I'm guessing she's the one to impress--not that you have to, but she's the more difficult one."

"And your brother?"

You chuckle, "Nothing to worry about. I wanna say he doesn't care, I don't know how to explain it. He's not judgemental or protective of me. He's the type of person you need to get to know to form an opinion on." You glance at Bucky, he's staring off at the horizon trying to make out Lady Liberty's form in the distance. "My dad, though, he would've loved you from the get go, no doubts about it. All you would've had to do was smile, tell him how much you love me and talk baseball with him."

Bucky looks at you at the mention of your father, you rarely talk about him but when you do it is really special. It feels like you're sharing a piece of your soul with him. He cradles your face with both hands and kisses your forehead.

"You don't have to love my family, and they don't have to love you either. Their opinion won't change the way I feel about you… but I know them, I know they'll love you."

_________________________________________________________________________

After graduation Bucky takes you for a weekend getaway at the cabin. Apparently Bucky would inherit it, but for now it was yours for the weekend.

At night you're outside sitting by the firepit, cuddling with Bucky and getting devoured by the mosquitoes. "Hey, baby."

You hum drowsily. "Yeah, Buck."

"I gotta tell you something important, it's been driving me nuts and you're my person, you know I tell you everything."

"What's going on, Buck?" You ask sitting up straight to pay attention.

"That day, about a month ago, when you met my Bubbe… Well she gave me her ring, to propose, you know for when we're ready. I know we're not there yet, but I wanted you to know that I intend on giving it to you one day. I'm serious about us. I want us to take our time, do this our way on our terms. That's why I didn't ask you to marry me that day. I want to see how far we can go."

You think back to that day, your conversation on the bridge. He could've asked you right there but he didn't, because he wanted to have a discussion with you. He wanted to make sure that this is something you want instead of just springing the question onto you. And that right there is why you're sure Bucky is the one for you, because he is unlike any other man you've been with before. Bucky is the definition of considerate and selfless, it's why you're sure you would've said yes then just like you would say yes if he asked you right now.

You grab his face and pull him in for a kiss. "Till the end of the line, Buck." You whisper against his lips.

Bucky is thrilled by your answer and pleasantly surprised by your follow up question.

“How do you feel about having kids?”

“I love the idea of a little version of you and I running around. I’d love to, how about you?” He smiles so hard the corner of his eyes crinkle in that way you love.

“I’d love to have some stability first but yes, I do want kids. Two at least.”

“One of each?” He asks.

“Not really, just don’t want them to be lonely.” You explain.

“You’re gonna be an amazing mother one day. But first, how about we get a place for the two of us?”

"I'm in."

___________________________________________________________

Three years later

On an ordinary Sunday morning, after brunch at the cafe you two had your first cuddles and cocoa, as well as your first date, Bucky proposes to you.

He gets down on one knee in the middle of the sidewalk to 'tie up his shoelaces'. When you look down at him you find him staring right back at you with heart eyes, a sheen of unshed tears pooling in the bottom of his beautiful eyes.

"Bucky?"

It shouldn't surprise you that this is happening but it still does. He hands you his to go cup, which feels cool to the touch and very light. You turn the cup in your hand and see his handwriting there. Will you marry me?

"Cuddles and Cocoa forever?" He asks, you open up the cup and find the ring.

"Yes. Cuddles and Cocoa Forever!!" You tackle him to the ground with your hug. Bucky kisses you like he never had before, leaving you breathless. You hand him the ring and gesture for him to slide it onto your finger.

From inside the cafe, Bucky's grandma and Shanna-- the girl that was working the cash register the night you had your first date with Bucky, cry tears of joy for the both of you.

The End.

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

i just accidentally found an aphobe’s discourse blog and kinda doomscrolled through all their posts and reblogs because i was curious and couldnt stop myself and now i just want to go back into the closet with my labels, throw the closet into the ocean and pretend i’ve never had any thoughts about anything at all.

that person specifically also had that thing where they “support” some aros and aces but not all of them, and it just sucks more because it’d be easier to deal with if they were just a flatout mean aphobe, but they pretend to care and they come from this “think about it logically, i’m only being reasonable” angle and it just leaves such a bad, bad taste in my mouth. it hurt to see that those posts had thousands of notes too. plus the fact that they were LGBT too, it just feels like nobody’s safe for aros and aces.

it really got me down and i’m not the only one who’s affected like this right? idk i feel like i need reassurance, something to say not everyone’s so against aros and aces, and that i’m not the only one who feels so isolated.

(also i wish the block button did more, because yes i can block someone but that’s only after reading their bad takes, how do i block that from my memory 😭😭)

Yeah you're not the only one with these kinds of feelings when you come across this stuff. And it's very deliberate what they do and the point is to cause hurt.

I definitely watched this movement pretty closely while it was at its peak on Tumblr (against better judgment), and as much as they play up the 'I'm just a rational human being having rational takes', the moment someone explained the flaws in their logic they were pretty quick to reveal they were just trolls and start replying with nonsense.

The 'I support some aces and aros' is generally bullshit too. Conditional support isn't support, and by support they meant 'I don't hate some of them if they fit my narrow definition for what I think they're allowed to be' not 'I've ever done anything to support this community'.

There's a reason the ace exclusionist "discourse" has mostly petered out on Tumblr though, and just pushed into a few small pockets, and it is because they started getting enough pushback it was easier to either move on to a new target or move to a new site where it was easier to spread hate than stay here. And a lot of that pushback came from the greater lgbtqia community who caught up to their tactics and didn't want it. Gatekeeping like what they do hurts all lgbtqia people, not just their current target, and most groups and organizations want nothing to do with these people.

If an lgbtqia group is tolerant of gatekeepers or not is also a great litmus test to see if it's a safe community (and most do not tolerate it at all).

It can be a trip going through one of their blogs though, especially the way they distort reality and say things in the cruelest ways they can. I definitely recommend just completely avoiding those blogs if you can.

So hopefully this helps you feel better. All the best, and take care!

[twoidiotwriters1]

Copycat: Origins —(Marvel Fem!Oc)

A/N: We reach the end of phase three at last! I might not post next phase right away cause I haven’t finished it (first time that’s happened in a while) but I’m hoping it’ll only take an extra week, maybe less if you’re lucky -Danny

Words: 2,155

Phase Three Masterlist

Previous Chapter // Phase Four

Listen to: ‘Birds’ -by Imagine Dragons

xxx: Fallen Heroes

"Agent Copycat reporting for duty," she stood beside Fury, both of them facing the group of people that were scattering.

He hummed. "It's been a long day, agent. Dare I say it's been more than a day in your case. Take some time off, I'll call you."

She was almost glad to hear him say that. "Fine, but don't take too long."

He chuckled lowly. "Look at you, pretending you want this..."

"It's what I do best," She saw Peter walking in their direction. "Pretend."

Cat excused herself and met Peter halfway, she smiled a little.

"Have you and May found a new place to stay?"

"We're still looking."

"What about Pietro's apartment?"

He looked at her. "What about you and Wanda?"

She shrugged. "She talks to me but it's not like we're close friends. She understands I didn't mean any hurt... I'm sorry about what happened between us, though."

Peter kept his eyes on her and she knew what was coming even before he'd blurted out his reply.

"Don't break up with me."

"Pete..." She said tiredly.

"We can make it work, C.C."

"C.C. doesn't exist anymore," Cat replied in frustration. "We burnt her papers, deleted school files, everything."

"Okay," He replied, clutching his hope. "Copycat's been my partner for years— I dated her too, and I know she loves me—"

"I like someone else now," She said plainly. "I've been with others while you were gone. I'm sorry... It's— It's not just our age gap. You were gone for too long."

Cat hadn't originally planned to confess that to Peter, but it seemed that nothing in the world could convince him to give up on her. Pietro once told her that when you love someone, nothing they do can make you leave, so Peter had to stop loving her.

"I killed people," She hid her hands in her pockets so he couldn't see them shaking. "I wanted others to suffer. I stole things from people that didn't deserve it. Our future was nothing but a dream, and what I've done, that's the reality."

The boy stepped back as if he'd been slapped in the face. He stared, her soul had been revealed to him and for the first time, he did not recognize her.

"You're only saying that push me away," He muttered, and even though he was right, she could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

"I don't see the point in fighting for what we had," She said feigning disinterest. "S'not worth it."

She wrapped her jacket tighter around her body and looked away. Cat knew she would never be able to look at him without feeling ashamed of this moment.

"I'll send you the keys to Pietro's apartment, I'll pick up his stuff later. Maybe Wanda will want some of them. Talk to the landlord about the new lease."

"Cat—"

"Don't look for me," She turned away and blinked back the tears. "I'm not your friend."

"You know, I wish there was a way that I could let her know... that we won. We did it."

"She knows," Wanda said. "They all know."

"You should try and write letters to Nat," Cat offered. "Even if she won't read them."

Wanda's voice sounded a little amused. "Pi told you that, didn't he?"

Cat smiled without looking at her. "He was a good brother."

It stung, talking about him and knowing they would never see him again. She didn't want to keep thinking of the whole situation, she wanted to forget, all of it.

"I'm glad he wasn't alone," Wanda confessed. "I hated you for a while, felt like you'd been the reason for our separation, but if I really think about it... it was me."

"I was scared, desperate to get what you'd had for years... if I hadn't been so selfish, you wouldn't have felt the need to run."

"We could've been a family," Wanda asked absently. "Nice pipe dream."

Clint patted their shoulders. "You're not so little anymore, are ya?"

Wanda had to look up in order to lock eyes with Cat. "I don't know about you, Copy, but I still have room to grow."

"Toddlers," Rocket approached the young mutants. "Got something for you."

He noticed their hesitant glances and scoffed.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You've been trying to kidnap us ever since we told you we're staying on Earth."

"I changed my mind," Rocket grumbled. "You'd be the worst Guardians now that the old group's back."

The mutants shared a look, they nodded in agreement.

"Probably."

"I mean, they're far more experienced, including that demigod dipshit—"

"No, that's all bullshit!" Rocket exclaimed. "I was trying reverse psychology, that always worked on you!"

"I'm sorry, Rat," She smiled. "Maybe you could try and hit me real hard on the head, see if that makes me forget the last year of my life?"

"Don't give him ideas," Kurt said disapprovingly.

"Ah, crap, I'll miss you two," Rocket rubbed his eyes roughly. "You're like my children... Groot, come say bye to the toddlers!"

"Having a raccoon as our father figure was definitely not on the list," She noted.

"Becoming an Avenger wasn't on mine for sure," Kurt sighed. "But I think I was pretty damn good anyway."

Young Groot fist-bumped the mutants. Rocket tried to stretch his farewell a bit more.

"Don't be strangers," He said. "Give your Captain a call every now and then, otherwise I'll go crazy surrounded by all of those idiots."

"You love those idiots, Rat."

"Love is a strong word," He groaned. "I tolerate them."

"Sure," Kurt opened his arms. "Group hug?"

They knelt so Rocket didn't have to jump, Cat wished they could stay that way forever, maybe then she'd never think of all the others they would never get to hold again.

"Have this," The raccoon handed her the blaster he'd been carrying around. "You're a sharpshooter, I'm sure you'll find a good use for it... and here," Rocket took off his scarf and wrapped it around Kurt's neck. "So you can hide your ugly face."

"You know... I tried. When I had the gauntlet, the stones, I really tried to bring her back... I miss her."

"We all do," Cat replied. "I gotta locate her sister, let her know what happened..."

"She'll be impossible to find, Cat. She's just like Natasha."

"Yeah well, guess who trained me?" She shrugged. "I have time. Too much, actually. But I'm lacking dough... Gotta love your twenties."

Steve smiled at her. "You know, it's not so bad that you're like Tony. We could use a new Stark."

"I could shift into him right now and make you pee your pants out of pure shock."

Sam let out a disgusted grunt. "And they say you grew up."

Steve grabbed the case and walked towards the platform. "You have to be friendly if you're going to work together, the Avengers care for one another."

"You know, if you want, I could come with you," Sam offered.

"You're a good man, Sam. This one's on me, though." The blond man moved to Bucky and smiled at him. "Don't do anything stupid 'til I get back."

Bucky chuckled. "How can I? You're taking all the stupid with you."

They hugged, and something about it felt final.

"Gonna miss you, buddy."

"It's gonna be okay, Buck."

Cat locked eyes with the Winter soldier, he walked up to her.

"Buttercup," He greeted.

"Captain Hook," She retorted.

"How longs is this gonna take?" Sam ignored them.

"For him as long as he needs. For us, five seconds."

"He's not coming back, is he?" She whispered.

"Don't know," Bucky replied.

"He can't stand it when others get the spotlight, huh?" Cat taunted. "Tony just died, the least he could do is pretend it was an accident."

"You have a rotten sense of humor."

"And yet people like me more than they like you," She remarked.

"They're idiots."

Steve fell into the tunnel and didn't come back on his mark. Banner tried to bring him but nothing was working. Sam got worried, Bucky turned around to leave, then stopped.

"Sam," He called.

The three of them approached the figure seated on a far bench.

"Go ahead," Bucky told them.

The others shared a look, they moved together.

"...Cap?"

"Hi, guys."

"You little shit," She crossed her arms.

"Did something go wrong, or did something go right?" Sam smiled.

"Well, after I put the stones back, I thought... maybe I'll try some of that life Tony and Cat were telling me to get."

"How'd that work for ya?"

"It was beautiful."

"Good. I'm happy for you. Truly."

"Thank you."

"Only thing bumming me out is the fact I have to live in a world without Captain America."

"Oh," Steve grabbed a package, his hands were thin and wrinkled. "That reminds me..."

He unwrapped a shield, one that had not been destroyed by Thanos.

"Try it on."

Sam looked back at Bucky and Bucky nodded encouragingly. He seized the shield and looked down at it with a frown.

"How does it feel?"

"Like is someone else's."

"It isn't."

Sam took a deep breath. "Thank you. I'll do my best."

"That's why it's yours."

He shook Steve's hand. The old man's attention fell on her.

"Why the long face, Heathen? I'm leaving you in good hands."

"I don't need 'em, I got my own."

"That's what I meant," He beamed. "Come here."

She sat beside him. Steve patter her knee, on his left hand he had a gold ring.

"I'm not sure you want to be on the team after all that's happened..."

She looked ahead, lost in thought. "I'd be angry at you if I didn't think saying goodbye feels liberating, to some extent. Without the Avengers, I won't be so pressured to live up to their standards. Who knows? Maybe this way I'll be better..."

"That's all we ever wanted for you," Steve nodded.

"Hey," Sam gestured at Steve's hand. "You're gonna tell us about her?"

"No," He grinned playfully. "No, I don't think I will."

"C'mon, Sam, don't be silly," Cat said matter-of-factly. "Her is a he, and he's standing right behind us! I always knew you guys would end up together, bit insulting that you didn't invite us to the wedding, though."

Steve laughed in a lighthearted way. "I guess he would've been alright, but I wouldn't want to steal your chance to shoot your shot. I heard you like that sort of older and grumpy fellow..."

"Oh God, I can't believe Pietro told you about that," She blushed.

"He loved talking about you, and we were always asking for updates," The old man squeezed her hand. "Whatever you do, Cat, remember you were loved. Remember your family."

They knocked on the door softly, once it opened Matthew welcomed them in.

"You could've said no, you know?"

"Right," He laughed dryly. "Refusing to help the heroes that brought everyone back— Who do you think I am?"

"The love of my life?" She teased. "Just tell us where to go, you're probably expecting friends and even if you're not, we shouldn't stay for too long..."

Matthew gave her a piece of paper. "Ask for Maggie, tell her I sent you."

"Who's Maggie?"

"My mother."

"You have a mother?" Her eyes widened.

"Mimi..."

"Right— sorry," She looked at Kurt and then back at Matt. "Thank you again."

"Keep in touch," He placed a hand on her shoulder and squeezed. "Take care, alright?"

"Yeah," Cat smiled a little. "You too."

Twenty minutes after they left the building, she heard Kurt giggling.

"What?" She snapped.

"He's handsome," He raised a brow, still smirking. "And blind. Do you like him cause he can't see your creepy eyes and your weird friends?"

"Trust me, Smurf, he sees us," Cat heaved a sigh. "And yet he's never told me whether he thinks I'm attractive or not."

"Don't be a sinner, Mimic. Can't you see we're in church?"

Cat looked up and found herself standing outside a temple. She looked at her friend with a frown.

"Are you sure you'll be fine here? I mean, you're not exactly a beacon of sanctity."

"Hey, they're the ones that can't discriminate against me, right?" He shrugged. "As long as it's secluded and away from prying eyes, I should be fine. Maybe they'll end up liking me?"

"Well, Matt said this is a discrete place," She tilted her head. "I trust his judgment."

"Or you're blinded by love," Kurt taunted.

"You know better than to think I'm in love," She rolled her eyes. "I've got a stupid crush, that's all. I'm a busy woman, and he thinks I'm too young."

"But what if he didn't?"

"Then we would get married right away," She replied sarcastically. "Ya done with the dumb questions? Wrap that scarf properly and let's head inside."

"Once I hide here," Kurt continued as they entered. "What are you going to do?"

"I'll get a cheap apartment, I'll patrol the city with Daredevil, make sure we stay away from Spider-man... I'll visit you as often as possible."

"Are you going to go back to hiding? Once you're an agent, I mean."

"What would be the use of a spotlight, anyway? You see what putting a target on your back does to the people around you. Most of my friends are dead or no longer my friends, but still, I think it's better if I quietly move away from the public eye."

Kurt walked across the church's hall with her, stopping in front of the altar. "I think it's good that we're choosing to remain anonymous, we're free."

"It's a nice way to put it."

Cat stared at the colorful windows, it would take a while before she could feel good about living.

Next Phase —>

Taglist.

@ieatpanicattacksforlunch​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @jesuswasnotawhiteman​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @siriuslysirius1107​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @greengarsstuff​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @itsyagirl01 @23victoria​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @espressopatronum454​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @jkthinkstoomuch

[luna-rainbow]

Awesome—I’m not posting any nwh spoilers on my account until after the weekend either so don’t worry about feeling like you gotta answer this right away 😉

So basically something that I felt nwh really did well was the way that they pushed the rehabilitation/redemption theme with the villains. It’s made EXTREMELY clear both through characters like Peter telling us & them showing us through the characters’ actions that the villains are NOT bad people, what’s happening to make them this way is out of their control & I felt this was particularly clear with both Otto & Norman, Norman even more so since Otto gets “cured” earlier on & the Goblin does WAY WORSE stuff in the movie, but the way Dafoe portrays the difference between Norman & the goblin is SO WELL DONE (absolute MASTER CLASS level performance by willem dafoe btw, he absolutely blew me away in every scene he was in), Norman just seems so lost & scared & he can’t even remember what happens when the goblin takes over but it’s clear that he doesn’t want to hurt anyone & he even is the one who helps Peter cure Otto before the goblin takes over. It was just such a great message about redemption & rehabilitation & how even the worst people deserve an opportunity of be saved & I loved it.

& it just made me think about how tfatws so horribly botched their “redemption” story with Bucky & how great it could have been if they had done something like this. Obviously Bucky doesn’t need to be cured of anything but nwh did a good job of really hammering it home that villains like Otto & Norman had NO CHOICE in their actions & once given a choice were actual good, kind people who did everything they could to try to help Peter. It would have been nice to see this same treatment given towards Bucky & it really shows how little tfatws writers cared about him in contrast to some of these other writers who seem to care much more about the characters. Not to mention that they just made Bucky kinda unlikable at certain moments throughout the show. Idk it just says a lot about the way that Bucky was written that I’m coming out of the year liking & being more sympathetic to Norman fucking Osborn than I am towards Bucky.

Yeah, NWH was interesting in that the villains, while under influence, said they didn't want to be cured. Maybe a real life parallel would be like someone who has a severe drug addiction and they say they don't want to give up, but they're not really themselves while they're under the "possession" of the addiction.

What I liked about the final message was that Tom!Peter, in giving Norman and the rest a second chance, also gave himself a second chance. This was the second chance that the other Peters had to really struggle through and come to terms with on their own (and they will always carry their mistakes with them), but he took in the older Peters' advice as well as Aunt May's words, and it made him grow. He was also very, very close to veering away from heroism - his words to May about how it wasn't his responsibility to help them, and his later anger and just wanting to destroy what brought him pain. It was a very tender scene with the three Peters and MJ and Ned, FOR ONCE Marvel showing how much difference love and support can make after a traumatic event.

And, like, honestly, that was the story I wished Bucky could have. He never should have gotten the villain rehabilitation arc, instead he should have had the wayward hero growth arc. The storyline I wished he had following Cap 2 is to go on a destructive raze through Hydra, then for him to come to two realisations: 1) he didn't want or need to be the weapon they turned him into, and 2) his life doesn't need to revolve around Hydra, even if it's to destroy them, and their existence is not his responsibility. He realises that he deserves to have friends, and he deserves to dedicate time for himself and people he loves. He then turns to healing rather than forcing himself to fight non-stop.

Dafoe's portrayal was fantastic. I suppose he's getting to the age where he might have seen a lot more of ageing and dementia in his older peers or family, and his performance for Norman certainly seemed to draw inspiration from that. The way he switched to the Goblin was also riveting. Personally I had a big soft spot for Doc Ock, though XDD

[gainingfiction]

hi, this is the same anon from before (my favorite was big moments), i really enjoyed hot weather! joey as a character was really enjoyable, and i loved seeing him fall for ian. i'm always a sucker for genuine romance tropes applied to wg fiction. plus, big sweet charismatic but sort of ditzy jocks whose appetites dont slow down when they do and end up growing out of all their clothes and doubling their weight in the process... 🤤 BIG fan. this is likely antithetical to your writing process, but i'm almost curious what his weight was by the end. it didn't seem like he grew as much as an average character in your stories (not a complaint), but that might be because the narrative was so focused on making him likable and handsome that it didnt describe the exact specifics of his size. not a complaint though, i definitely had a crush on him that was stronger than just "he is a man getting very fat in my fetish erotica", so it worked a HUNDRED percent

side note, aside from the obvious (ie raul and enrique), do your characters have ethnicities? i only ask because i imagined joey as like, a more boyish winston duke, which i definitely enjoyed imagining and 3/4 of the way through reading i realized that his skin tone was never described. not an accusation of anything btw, im just curious about the less-described parts of characters in these kinds of things

(... yes i AM the kind of person who cares about ethnic diversity in amateur fetish erotica lmaooooo 💀if im gonna get off to men getting so fat they need several new wardrobes im gonna do it morally, god damn it!)

looking forward to whatever you post next!

Thanks for this awesome message, Anon! So glad you enjoyed!!

Sounds like we like the same tropes!! I’m a sucker for the “nerdy guy winning the (ex) jock’s heart”—maybe a bit of wish fulfilment on my end!

I did notice that "Hot Weather" ended up being a bit less descriptive and a little more plot-driven than some of my other work. I have a bit of a numbers kink (as you’ve probably noticed), I like scales and waist measurements and all of that fun stuff. But for this story I wanted to leave more to the imagination, and let the reader fill in as much as they wanted. So I left Joey’s weight ambiguous: we know he’s a strapping guy at 6’3”, so his starting weight could easily be close to 200 pounds. And we know that by January, he’d gained 50 pounds since starting his job sometime in the summer. The shorter timeline of this story also means that even though he gained quickly, he didn’t get to the size of someone like Daniel or Jason or Connor (at least not during the story). Other than the fact that he started gaining even more weight once he moved in with Ian, I thought I would leave his total weight gain an open question, as a sort of indication that Joey just stopped caring altogether.

As for diversity, I totally agree! It’s something that I’m conscious of and I’m trying to incorporate more of going forward. Lately I’ve been a little more vague with some of my descriptions, to leave readers more room to play out their own fantasies. So I’m thrilled that you imagined Joey as being Black! I’m not gonna pull a JK Rowling and start retroactively claiming diversity points, but I’m always delighted when readers draw their own conclusions: that’s one of the things I like best about gainer stories, you can imagine whatever type of guy you find the dreamiest!

As for characters of colour, I can’t speak for my co-author, but in writing “Lifeguard of Duty” I wrote Peter as being Korean (straight dark hair, his grandmother’s bibimbap recipe). And an upcoming story delves a little bit into the family life of a feeder named Ali, who’s Middle Eastern.

Thanks for reading! 😊 My next story, “All In a Day’s Work” is a little more experimental than some of the other stuff I’ve posted, but hopefully just as satisfying! Ideally I’ll have it online sometime in early-May.