#I played the game for like 8 hours straight where am I

[asmidge]

Spider-Man 2 for PS5 is so good this game is making me feel off the shits right now. crazed. best game ever I fear

[leilakisakabiri]

Jealousy, Jealousy (Gavi)

Summary: You realize that Gavi never gets jealous when other guys are around you and it makes you question if he still likes you. 

Warning(s): None

A/N: Hey! I had some inspiration to write so here I am! I’m trying to release shorter fics while I work on my longer ones. Requests are open!

Word Count: 2.5k+

Masterlist

The first time it happened, you felt relieved that Gavi had decided not to make a scene and instead chose to calmly defuse the situation.

The two of you had been at a club late one night, the high from Barcelona winning hours before pumping through your veins. He had his arms wrapped around you as you both danced to whatever Spanish song the DJ was mixing.

You laughed as he spun you around before pulling you closer, leaning down to whisper in your ear as he moved a strand of hair out of your face. 

"I'm going to grab another drink. Want to come?"

His breath was hot against your ear, and even though it felt like a million degrees in the club, and you were sweating through your dress, you still shivered, his voice sending shockwaves through your system no matter how many times you heard it.

You looked up, locking eyes, "I'm good, I'll save our spot."

He kissed the top of your head before letting go, "Ok I'll be back in a second. Try and find the others if you can."

You gave him an awkward thumbs up as he walked away and he chuckled before disappearing into the crowd.

The two of you had been dating for just shy of three weeks.

You had been friends for months before dating, with you initially being introduced to him through his hometown friends. Then there was a three-month period where you both liked each other but were too scared to admit it and ruin the friendship. Finally, Gavi caved after spending two weeks away from you without contact while he playing in the U.S.

Since he admitted his feelings for you that night on the steps of your shitty college house, he had jumped straight into the relationship, inviting you to his games, to hang out with his friends, and private dinners. You on the other hand still felt like an awkward pre-teen girl every time you were with him, he just made you feel giddy inside, and you reacted to things he said so intensely that the only way to cover it up was with strange humor and stupid jokes.

That led you to now. Sometimes being around him was so overwhelming because you were always scared you would say something to embarrass yourself, and although he never made you feel any less worthy you couldn't help but feel like he could be with someone much better than you.

As you stood there contemplating, you felt a body collide with yours, effectively pulling you out of your thoughts.

You stumbled, feeling hands come up to grip your elbows, stabilizing you.

"Shit- my bad."

You looked up seeing the guy holding you sporting a white button-down and an apologetic smile.

"Sorry, those guys just pushed me. Some friends." He said referring to the group of five or so extremely drunk boys behind you.

You shook your head, "No worries, I wasn't paying attention either."

He smiled, leaning a bit closer, hands still on your elbows, "Hey do I know you? You look really familiar.”

You squinted your eyes as you gazed at him, trying to figure out if you knew him.

"Eh I go to Universitat de Barcelona if that helps."

His eyes lit up at your words, and he nodded, "Yeah, that's totally how I know you. I think you're in my biology class."

You groaned, "No way the one at 8 a.m.?", he nodded, "I'm barely awake for that lecture." you muttered.

"Mean either but it's hard not to notice you."

You only heard half his sentence and looked at him confused, "Sorry what?"

His lips tugged up in a smile as he bent down, shifting closer to you, "I said it's hard not to notice you."

You felt your breath stop as you realized what you had gotten yourself into. You made a move to shy away when you heard Gavi call your name.

You lifted your head seeing him approaching as he carried your drink, "Hey who's this?"

You went to interject and tell him it was no one but the guy next to you interrupted, "Hey man, I got to school with her.”

Gavi nodded, accepting his answer as he handed you your drink, "Oh class friend?"

You went to speak but were again cut off by the guy next to you, who had still to let go of your elbow.

"Something like that."

You saw Gavi's posture slightly straighten at his words but he relaxed a second later, "Alright."

The guy turned to you saying something about seeing you in class and then proceeded to give you a hug, his arms wrapping around your lower back.

You noticed Gavi watching the exchange but he made no comment.

You approached him timidly, unsure of if he was going to say anything about the situation, but he paid it no mind, going back to casual conversation with you.

At the time you let out a breath, thankful that he seemed intent on letting you handle your own situation.

That thankfulness soon turned to annoyance and then confusion when similar situations happened time and time again and he made no effort to speak up.

You supposed it was good he never got jealous because you knew it could get very overbearing very fast, and yet, you couldn't help the twinge of defeat you felt every time someone tried to make a move on you and he did nothing to stop them or even show a ounce of emotion.

Slowly it was making you start to question your relationship with Gavi.

Why did he not get jealous? Was it because he didn't see others as a threat? Or didn't feel the need to because you weren't as pretty as the other girls he was seen with? Maybe he simply didn't care? Or perhaps he wasn't the type?

You knew the last one couldn't possibly be true because he was absolutely the type. His entire career was based on his passion, determination, and aggression to get where he wanted. His aggression is what made him so competitive and a loyal player. So if he was so driven and passionate on the field, why was that not carrying over into your relationship?

It wasn't until almost two months later that things came to a boiling point.

It was the last game of the pre-season for Barcelona and spirits were high, everyone hoping they could seal off a great season, and enter a new one, with a win.

The stadium was filled to the brim with fans and reporters. The family section was also full with player's partners and families coming to support them in the final game of the summer.

You were sitting next to Anna, the two of you talking about school, work, and life.

Eventually, the game started and you went into full-on fan mode - cheering along when Barca made impressive plays and booing when they were tackled.

The stadium was abuzz with energy, and you basked in everyone's excitement.

You gripped Anna's hand as you saw Gavi running up the sidelines towards the other team's defense, Joao running parallel to him.

You saw him sidestep, dodging the defender, and suddenly the ball was soaring, perfectly landing at Joao's feet as he placed it into the back of the net.

The two of you jumped up, cheering along with the rest of the crowd. It seemed like Barcelona would have its victory after all.

After the game, you stayed in the family section for a while chatting with Pedri's parents as you waited for the players to make a re-emerge.

You bid goodbye to them when you got a text from Gavi telling you to come down.

You made your way down to the field, waiting behind the barricades for him to appear.

The other team's players appeared first, signing fans t-shirts and taking photos.

"Need something signed?"

You saw a player from the other team approach you, waving a sharpie in his hand.

You pointed at your jersey playfully, "No thanks. I'm a Barca girl if you couldn't tell."

He grinned, "Ahh c'mon what will it take for me to convince you?"

You shrugged your shoulders, "Ride or die sorry."

He clutched his hand to his heart in mock offense, "Ouch. I'm hurt, but I'm not giving up."

You gave him a smile, remaining polite, as you looked over his shoulder for Gavi.

"Oh I know!" he exclaimed, directing your attention back to him.

He wiggled his eyebrows before taking off his shirt, "Here, new jersey for you."

He held it out to you, and you gave him an unimpressed look.

He rolled his eyes playfully, "Alright fine. I'll sign it, but only cause you asked so nicely."

You watched amused as he signed the jersey before offering it to you.

You squinted your eyes at him.

He dangled the jersey in his hands, "C'mon take it. You know a lot of people would pay good money for this."

You reached out to grab it, "Fine, but only because I'm going to sell it later."

He held up his hands in surrender, "It's yours now. Do whatever."

You thought the conversation would end there but he made no effort to leave, "Who are you here with anyway? Someone in Barca?"

You opened your mouth to respond but were cut off.

"Me."

You whipped your head to see that Gavi had silently approached the two of you.

Besides yourself, you felt a tiny part of you waiting with bated breath for him to do something, to finally dig his boots in the ground and say something, but he remained impassive.

"Hey."

"Hey, you ready to go?" Gavi asked.

You nodded your head, unsure of how to leave the situation.

"I can lift you over the barricade if you need." The other player spoke up, and your eyes immediately flitted over to Gavi's to gauge his reaction.

His eyebrows furrowed but he didn't say anything.

You debated for a second, just to get Gavi to react, but quickly decided against it, opting to just walk around the barricade.

You approached the two of them quickly and with a hasty goodbye followed Gavi as he left the pitch. You heard the other player shout a 'see you around', and you waved in response.

You broke the silence first as you walked the empty tunnel, "Great game baby. You did amazing."

"Thanks."

His reply was clipped.

He went to hold your hand and you shifted the jersey last second to your other hand, catching his attention.

"What's that?"

"Oh, that guy gave me his jersey. I'm going to sell it." You explained, telling him how you were expecting to make hundreds.

He listened along till you finished.

"Can I see the jersey?"

You nodded handing it to him.

You swung your joint hands as you walked, talking to him about the game as he examined the jersey.

Abruptly he dropped your hand, mouth set in a firm line.

Your eyebrows stitched together, "What's wrong?"

He cleared his throat before handing you the jersey.

"I think there's something for you on it."

"I forgot something in the locker room, I'll be right back." He continued.

You looked down confused, eyes scanning the text before it clicked.

The jersey had the player's phone number on it.

You lifted your head seeing him already walking away, "Gavi wait. Can you stop for a minute?"

He turned around but continued moving, "Yeah what?"

"Stop moving!” You exclaimed, your frustration building as he continued to not express any interest in the situation.

He finally halted and you closed the distance between the two of you.

"Is there something wrong with me? Do you not like me anymore or something?"

He seemed taken aback by your words and several emotions flitted across his face, "What are you talking about?"

You took a breath, it was now or never.

"I'm not trying to sound conceited, but I'm pretty sure that guy was hitting on me-"

"He was." Gavi confirmed.

You continued, "So then why don't you care? I'm your girlfriend, so why aren't you getting jealous when other guys hit on me?"

"You want me to get jealous?" He asked incredulously.

"I mean I don't want you to become super overprotective or anything, but it would be nice if you at least acknowledged when someone is trying to get with me right in front of you. I know I would get jealous if someone was saying that to you."

"You don't think I get jealous?" His voice had a hard edge to it, and suddenly you felt like you might have read between the lines wrong.

You shrugged your shoulders, unsure, "I mean you don't show it."

"Of course I'm going to notice when some guy is eye fucking my girl one foot away from me, I'm not fucking blind."

"Then why don't you say anything?" You pressed.

“Shit y/n that's cause I don't want to scare you away!"

His admission only confused you further, and you lowered your voice acutely aware that your shouts were probably carrying far in the quiet tunnel,

"Scare me away? Why would that scare me?"

He shook his head, "The press is always making me out to be this bad guy. This kid that doesn't know how to get his temper in check and - mierda y/n - I don't want to get into this right now."

You relented, unwilling to give in, biting the bullet, "Alright so next time someone asks to lift me up, their just being friendly right? Trying to be helpful?"

His eyes blazed, "That's not what I meant and you know it."

You lifted your hands in frustration, "No Gavi actually I don't know that. You act like you don't even care."

"I care! Trust me y/n I care!" He argued.

"Then show me."

His lips were on yours before you had even finished processing what you were saying. His skin felt hot against yours as his fingers sank into your hipbone, crowding you against the wall.

You lost your train of thought as you got lost in the sensation he provided you. One hand went to tangle in his hair, as the other draped around his neck bringing him impossibly closer.

One of his hands slipped under your shirt, as he kissed you senseless. You finally pulled away for a breath but he didn't stop, moving to lay a trail of kisses from the sweet spot behind your ear, down your neck, and onto your collarbone.

You left out a soft moan underneath him, the feeling causing tingles in your spine, and a fluttery feeling in your stomach.

"We should really sto- fuck gavi - so-someone could walk in any moment." You reminded him.

"Just gotta leave a mark." He replied.

You nodded before his words caught up to you and you pushed him off, "What? No marks! I have to meet your parents tonight." You whined.

He grinned, not looking the least bit apologetic, "At least people will know you're mine now."

[shortcakesturns]

I don't know if you are taking requests, but i was wondering if you can do one where the reader and Chris are secretly dating and the reader is a popular singer and she gives the guys tickets and she writes a song to Chris but only he knows it's about him and after the show they reveal to Matt and Nick that they are dating? Maybe the song could be into you by Ariana Grande. Thank you 😊

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 - 𝐂𝐇𝐑𝐈𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐎

SUMMARY: The ask!!

WARNINGS: explicit language,reader pov, slightly suggestive, not proofread man it’s 2:43 am I will after I get some sleep

The overwhelming cheers of fans are heard from behind the set, the sold out stadium show. The nerves creeping up on me as I felt as if I could hear my heartbeat.

Thump…thump…

“Y/n it's time.”

I look at my manager as I nod my head as I step onto the platform as I slowly rise into the air and the intro plays.

The overwhelmingly bright lights fill my vision as I step foot onto the stage.

I see the the warm smile that I began to love around 8 months ago, and that confidence boost from my chris’s smile as I begin to sing.

“I'm so into you

I can barely breathe”

The cheers grow louder…the blood rushing to my head as I confidently dance with the spotlight pointed at me. My eyes slowly drift around the crowd meeting the triplets faces yet again.

“And all I wanna do

Is to fall in deep

But close ain't close enough

'Til we cross the line, hey, yeah

So name a game to play

And I'll roll the dice, hey”

in my ear piece my managers voice booms.

“Y/N, YOUR TENSE FOCUS”

I lock eyes with chris, my handsome boy. Dressed in all black with messy sweaty hair and a black wife beater with jeans that barely fit him.

That hair…the hair that my fingers have entangled with the past few nights. That chain that’s dangled in front of my face for the past two days.

“So, baby, come light me up

And maybe I'll let you on it

A little bit dangerous

But, baby, that's how I want it

A little less conversation and a little more touch my body

'Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you”

Nobody knows about me and chris. Sure speculations, but nobody knows about the nights I spent in his bed. Nobody knows about the nights we spent texting each other for over 5 hours straight.

as the choreography intensifies, I drop to my knees and crawl towards the edge of the stage right in front of chris. my eyes still on his beautiful pupils.

Grabbing chris’s chin to lift his head up so he can get a better look at me.

“Got everyone watchin' us

So, baby, let's keep it secret

A little bit scandalous

But, baby, don't let them see it

A little less conversation and a little more touch my body

'Cause I'm so into you, into you, into you

Ooh, yeah”

The sweat droplets clearly forming on chris’s forehead. as I stand up and finish the set list. The fans going wild, and I just know that chris is too.

“Thank you! miami for the great night!”

I exit the stage and see my three favorite boys.

“Miss ma’am, do you have something to spill” Nick sassily speaks.

“mmm..possibly…” I go to grab chris’s hand and enter-twine my fingers with his,

“So like, we’ve been dating…for like ever…” chris says smiling, his handsome and sweet innocent smile.

“I FUCKI- I CALLED IT I TO- I TOLD YOU NICK.” Matt points

“OH YOU SHUT UP MATT I DIDNT WANNA ASSUME ANYTHING SO ZIP THAT SHIT LOCK THAT SHIT AND PUT IT IN YOUR FUCKING POCKET” Nick yells back at the boy.

“okay but like can we talk about the hard launch effort?” I throw my hands in the air.

[zomboivex]

Chapter 10 Thoughts (Spoilers under cut)

This is my 5am thoughts where I got maybe 4 hours of sleep and haven’t fully processed what I read (and need to read again to comb for more details)

But here goes;

1) Moby was very very eager to send them on that mission and i know he says it’s to get in good favor again etc but like- does that mean that advisors get incentives if one of their houses win the laurel crown? Or would he like get the money from them too? Idk but my INITIAL thought was he was going to set them up for failure. But I am very much on the train of not trusting the advisors

2) Ed’s powers are definitely something and we only saw just a portion of it, I’m sure. Rui at least believes Ed is the strongest vampire. Like purple alluring mist? Text bubbles over people’s heads? Buddy. Lmfao

3) The bar chat. Trial. Are they talking about those Clementia twins mentioned earlier in the game? (It’s been a minute so I’d have to look for more details) but that makes the most sense to me?

4) Haru playing pretend zookeeper. Buddy I don’t think it’s pretend no more lol he basically is a zookeeper. But that comment struck me a little odd, anyways. Haru are you fooling us? Are you harboring ill intentions?

5) mentions of a traitor/spy again. More and more I think it’s Hyde. Someone we met early on and ‘trust’. But it could be Haku. I’m still gonna be team Hyde is scum though.

6) Obscuary knows so much but are straight up just keeping it all to themselves (by Obscuary I mean Ed and Rui).

7) I am still convinced that the more Rui’s curse does its thing- the more he’s turning into a reaper, himself (I mean- MC is also cursed and is also turning).

8) Ed being down bad for Rui hahahahahahahhaa same buddy. Same.

9) Lyca having his moment of realization that these humans he was trying to protect give not a single fuck if they think he’s the monster. Also just that entire scene in general.

10) That bar scene at the end with Rui and Ed. Sorry. Sorry. You will have to pry this ship from my cold fucking dead hands.

I have more thoughts but lack of sleep is making it difficult to think and I have to get ready for work.

Also I need to reread the entire chapter to squeeze out more things. Because I was half asleep (and very slap happy) reading it.

[godhandler]

Obeisance to the Arrow - Noritoshi Kamo

#8 : Ice-Cream Date 

[why should you trust Noritoshi Kamo? Why should he trust you?]

[tw: noritoshi kamo x reader, arranged marriage, Danny DeVito, forced marriage, child marriage, small filler chapter a bit to round out the plot, omg they’re getting along, house captivity, fluff]

#7 - Jealousy, Jealousy #9 : The Lady Kamo

“This is not fun at all.” You huff at Noritoshi Kamo. “I want to throw flying kicks.”

Your husband has got you doing warm-up shit for the past half an hour: running, touching toes, stretching. For someone who spitefully promised to replace Kanato, his half-brother, as your martial arts tutor, he’s not letting you do much of martial arts. Only the promise of letting you shoot arrows from his bow is making you not immediately leave the training room.

“You’ll injure yourself if you do all that without any prior training. We’ll go step-by-step. Now–” Kamo leans over you from behind, lightly pulling your waist to correct your downward dog form (you reckon your blush can be put down to exercise; you’re just 14 after all). “– Distil me, and predict my next movements. That’s useful in combat.” 

Is this a test? Noritoshi knows that you’re strictly forbidden from using your cursed technique, under the threat of heavy punishment. Maybe he’s trying to get me into trouble so I can’t go to Jujutsu High. But… didn’t he sign my school admission papers himself? Did he change his mind?

“I never use Distillation, not since I came here.” You’re not taking any chances. Going to Jujutsu High is literally the only way you can be independent. Or else you live the rest of your life like Miyumi Kamo does: disrespected and discarded once her use was over. So you lie through your teeth: “I don’t even remember how to use it.”

“It’s impossible to forget your cursed technique. It’s engraved onto your brain, body and soul. So go ahead, Distil me.”

What game are you playing, Kamo?

“I can’t.”

“You already did, didn’t you?” Your heart skips a beat. Fuck. “Every night when you think I’m asleep. So go ahead now,” Kamo face is straight, no taste of humour or anger in it. “Read my thoughts.”

There’s no point hiding it now. You’re struck seeing your situations so plainly: Noritoshi Kamo is the heir of the opulent and influential Kamo Clan. You are his wife and nothing more. He has the power to decide whether your cursed technique usage goes punished or praised. He has the power to ruin your life. Right when you were forming buds of friendship, you are starkly reminded of the difference between your stations.

And you can’t not be you. “I don’t take commands.” I’m fucking this up so bad. “You might be angry about the whole Kanato thing, but don’t burden me with your issues. I don’t take commands.” Shit. I’m done for. I’m not going to Jujutsu High, am I?

Time extends infinitely as you await the judge to pronounce your sentence.

But perhaps... perhaps you don't understand Kamo, not even after all the times you've read his mind through and through, because he simply nods. Nothing more. “A request then?” He makes an effort, you can tell, to soften his voice.

You stand still like a statue. All he was trying was to give some space to practise your cursed technique; he just ended up pushing you back into your shell. Or rather a fortress, where you, a scared little child, hoard other people’s secrets, to be used against them when the time comes-- the only defence you have. And to think that he was actually doing so well trying to get you to come out of there.

How do I fix this? “Do you want to go out for ice-cream?” 

“Out?” You're shocked. You’re usually not allowed to leave the Kamo estate; the last time you did was maybe... 2 years ago? You don’t even remember. 

“It’ll be my treat, don’t worry. No one will say anything.”

Can he actually do that? Can he convince the elders to let me out? You’re a threat to society, you’ve internalised that by this point. Isn’t it wrong for you to go out?

—---

“I love going out! This is AMAZING!” You can’t stop taking pictures of everything- everyone! So many people! So many things to see! The smell of roasting dalgona, the lanterns hanging from cables overhead, the latest streetwear-clad bikers smoking, the businessman walking briskly, the mother scolding her children! Aeon Mall, Porta, Kyoto Station Building– you’re going through all of them, making the most out of your day out!

“You’ll be able to go out whenever you want when you’re in Jujutsu High.” Kamo, carrying your many shopping bags, reminds you calmly. You seem to have gotten over prior spat. 

“Take a picture of me here!” “I want to try double-decker donuts!” “Let’s get these Prada shawls, please, Noritoshi-san!” 

She’s so lucky she was born into money. Noritoshi enjoys seeing you this ecstatically happy. It’s just the two of you, Kamo doesn’t need any bodyguards or handlers. As you sit for an Italian dinner, he decides that it’s okay to breach your previous topic.

“yn, I’m very curious–”

“Do you think those shoes that guy’s wearing are ugly? 'Cuz I think they’re Danny DeVito level ugly.”

“– Gossiping isn’t good. As I was saying, I really want to know how your powers work, yn. Would you be okay telling me?”

You laugh at him, cheeks full of penne alfredo. “I don’t know much either, frankly. I wasn’t allowed to look into it, you know. Besides, if you’re looking for a method to block it, give up. Not even Gojo Satoru could do that.”

Kamo’s eyes are keen. “Why not?”

“Because it works on photons of light. Gojo’s Infinity works on matter, not light, because otherwise he’d be invisible. Distillation can speed up light in a very specific way so that I can 'see' glimpses of the past... understand the story, in a way. Anything I perceive with my eyes, I can Distil. Everything I can see, I know.” You say. "I kept getting headaches because it was just too much information at once, so I made a Binding Vow. I have to ask a very specific question so that I get a very specific answer, but in exchange I get to know answers for at least 50 years back in the past."

To think this talent was to be wasted. “You’re incredible.” I’ll protect her. I’ll have to. 

That also reminds him. “So all those times you Distilled me at night, you didn't ask if was sleeping?"

You smile sheepishly, "I was sure that you were."

He returns your smile. A rare moment. "So you know me, then?”

“Thoroughly.”

“Then you know that I am not your enemy.”

“I reckon.”

“And that I am trustworthy.”

You laugh. He might be as trustworthy as the sun, but you don’t know how to trust others. Still- "I'm sorry for Distilling you when you were asleep."

"I'd rather you ask me before you do that the next time. It's more polite." He uses the toasted bread to scoop up some pasta sauce. You copy him. "I see that there's no point keeping secrets from you?"

"Absolutely none."

"Then it's my right that you keep none from me, either."

Eh? He's not wrong but... He's asking you to trust him. Like friends do. Like married couples do. For all that he is, Noritoshi Kamo has no leverage in front of his wife: you alone decide how much you want to reveal to him.

"Alright, then. Whatever you ask me, I'll answer you honestly, as long as it is okay to do so." You promise. Kamo wipes a smidge of sauce off your cheek with a tissue. His way of saying, "Thank you."

“Noritoshi-san, teach me to spar properly. I don’t want to appear so weak among my classmates.”

“Is that a command?” You’re about to excuse yourself when you notice that he’s smiling. Holy fuck, he’s making a joke??

“Yes, Lord Kamo.” You play along.

“As you wish, Lady Kamo.”

#9 : The Lady Kamo

[ftmsimonriley]

thinking of ghost being a chronic insomniac, averaging at most 4 hours of sleep a night and its always been like that. even the rare occasions where he collapses and sleeps for 12 hours straight barely make a scratch in the exhaustion he constantly feels. and considering his childhood, he isn't even going to consider prescription medication, no matter how low of a dose and controlled it is.

and then he starts to really spend time with soap, outside of work. they don't do anything significant, at most meeting up at a cafe or a pub when they're both unfortunately up. (but it's not a date. totally) and ghost likes hanging out with johnny, he really does. the problem is that he's so tired. every single time. it isn't the usual exhaustion that he can wade through as it clings to him like the weight of water soaked into denim. it's genuine nodding off, eyelids heavy and thoughts drifting as he tries his best to pay attention to the conversation. johnny makes a playful comment every now and then ("am i that boring, lt? guess i'll have to try harder") but he really doesn't seem bothered.

and finally they meet up at either of their flats just to watch a movie, possibly after a stressful mission or just a stressful few months that made meeting up somewhere public sound unpleasant to both of them. and ghost doesn't even make it to the 30 minute mark of the movie. he's out cold almost immediately. not even jolting awake or trying to squint his eyes open. soap only notices when he makes a joke and he's met with a different kind of silence than simon's usual quiet, and looks over to find the man peacefully asleep.

and eventually simon wakes up to a whole other movie on the screen and a blanket he does not remember being there draped over him and a sleeping johnny. when he eventually finds his phone and checks the time, he's shocked to find that he had been out for 8 hours and he has never felt better. he's even more shocked that soap had stayed, when he had every opportunity to get up and leave.

a few more times like this pass, where simon falls asleep only to wake up tucked into wherever he had passed out and johnny still there, sometimes also asleep and other times simply watching tv or playing a game on his phone.

the insomnia recurs when they aren't together, leading simon to eventually figure out that he's so tired around johnny because he feels safe. even alone in his own flat, there's always that feeling of an impending threat, thanks to his career and rough upbringing. but with johnny; the man has watched his six so many times that he knows he's protected so long as soap is there.

[socialfakes]

crossing enemy lines -connor bedard-

part 8: bonus content!

nhl players x platonic hughes sister

connor bedard x hughes sister

series masterlist

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y/nhughes | from the vault 😂😉 tagged: trevorzegras

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trevorzegras how? | trevorzegras wait, better question. why? | y/nhughes because i know you have one of me so i thought i'd even the playing field a little bit | trevorzegras but i never posted yours 😂

jamie.drysdale so glad you posted this 😂 brightened my day | y/nhughes thanks for the idea jamie 😉 | trevorzegras you're a traitor 😲 | jamie.drysdale IT WAS NOT MY IDEA | jackhughes i distinctly remember you telling my sister to post this 😂 | jamie.drysdale okay stop lying. i never said that | lhughes_06 yup. i remember that too 🤔 | trevorzegras wow. that's heartbreaking | jamie.drysdale I NEVER SAID THAT

user12 why are y'all getting mad at jamie for telling y/n to post it when she's the one who took the picture in the first place 😂 | jamie.drysdale thank you!!! | y/nhughes jamie is just a common enemy at this point. not much i can do 🤷🏻‍♀️ | jamie.drysdale 🥺🥺🥺 | y/nhughes OH NO!!! I'M SORRY JAMIE. I LOVE YOU ❤❤❤ | jamie.drysdale it's okay. you are forgiven | trevorzegras what the hell is going on

user3 this picture is funny enough on its own but the comment section triples the funny factor 😂😂😂 | y/nhughes you had to emphasize that with 3 emojis? 😊 | user3 yes ma'am

jackhughes i actually remember this night. the first one to pass out and start drooling always gets their picture taken 😂 | y/nhughes yeah and if they snore loud, it gets posted online for all the fans to see 😈 | lhughes_06 so glad it wasn't me this time 😅 | _quinnhughes it's never me | trevorzegras i hate all 4 of you 😐 | jackhughes there's no way you hate y/n. especially not with the way you were talking about her like 4 hours ago on the phone | trevorzegras JACK!!! | y/nhughes wait what?!?!? 😱😱 | _connorbedard don't blame you trevor. she's perfect | _connorbedard i mean...WAIT WHAT?!?!?😱😠

user6 how is he so cute when he's sleeping?

user4 the cutest player | y/nhughes false 🙅🏻‍♀️ | jackhughes 'tis i | lhughes_06 no jack. 'tis i | _quinnhughes y'all are clearly not thinking straight. it's me | y/nhughes wrong, more wrong and most wrong | y/nhughes it's clearly nicohischier | nicohischier ❤ | _connorbedard 👀👀

user11 the hughes siblings bring chaos to our world and i am 100% here for it 😂

user8 have you ever thought of dating trevor? | y/nhughes honestly, not gonna lie about it. yes i have thought about dating trevor but that's ancient history at this point | trevorzegras why didn't you tell me? could've treated you like a princess 😂 | y/nhughes sorry trev ❤ i do love you (just not in that way) & i'm in a relationship where he treats me like a queen 😊 | _connorbedard 😊❤

Liked by _quinnhughes, _connorbedard, jackhughes and 493,281 others

y/nhughes | my two favorite human beings at the all-star game ❤ tagged: _connorbedard, _quinnhughes

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_connorbedard endless amount of love for you ❤

trevorzegras thought i was your favorite 😔

jackhughes thought you didn't have a favorite sibling 🤨 | y/nhughes i don't...

lhughes_06 well then...guess you don't want that coffee mug that says 'greatest sister ever' | y/nhughes but i am the greatest sister ever 🥺🥺 | lhughes_06 .....yeah you are. can't put you at fault because you have preferences | _quinnhughes don't be jealous lukey 😉

_quinnhughes i love you y/n ❤

jamie.drysdale they're only your favorites because one's your brother & the other one is your boyfriend, right? 🥺 | y/nhughes of course. you're my favorite outside of those 2 ❤ | trevorzegras dude | calemakar wait....thought i was your favorite 🥺 | y/nhughes wait, cale. you are my absolute favorite!! top tier best friend. that means you're above quinn and connor ❤

jackhughes feel like i should point out that i was at the all-star game too 😔 | y/nhughes yes but you didn't play | jackhughes well neither did connor but you still posted him 😂 | _connorbedard guess she just loves me more 🤷🏻‍♂️ | y/nhughes he's my boyfriend so i gotta post him occasionally jack | jackhughes i would like some appreciation once in a while too 🥺 | y/nhughes okay fine. would it make you feel better if i came to visit you and made you your favorite meal? | jackhughes ooh yes please ❤

user12 oh they're both so cute

user7 i don't know who i like more

user14 the one in the blue looks pretty hot 😏 | _quinnhughes thank you 😊 | y/nhughes the one in the red is hotter 😉

Liked by y/nhughes, calemakar, _connorbedard and 672,414 others

trevorzegras | i hope you enjoy this payback 😂😊 tagged: y/nhughes

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y/nhughes i hope you enjoy hell 😐🙄 | trevorzegras oh i will 😉

jackhughes the only time i enjoy her company | y/nhughes hey fuck you jack

calemakar so cute when she's sleeping 😊 | y/nhughes bitch i'm always cute | calemakar that is true 😏

_connorbedard whose room did you fall asleep in? | y/nhughes luke's | lhughes_06 only because her room is a disaster 😂

_quinnhughes as much as i appreciate embarrassing pictures of my sister, i'm more curious as to why you decided to go into the room while she was sleeping and take her picture 🤨😂 | jackhughes yeah me too | lhughes_06 explain yourself zegras | y/nhughes yeah trevor. explain yourself | trevorzegras why do i have to explain myself when y/n did the same thing not too long ago 😂

colecaufield i will take the blame for this one. it was my idea for him to get his 'revenge' | y/nhughes you are immediately forgiven ❤🥺 | trevorzegras what the heck dude

user3 i love this friendship more than anything 😂

user12 original shipper of hughgras 😂 | y/nhughes 🤨🤨🤨 | user12 you and trevor....hugh(es) and (ze)gras | y/nhughes oh okay....but no. sorry sweetie

calemakar i realize that you always sleep in this position 😂 | _quinnhughes wait... 🤨🤨 | calemakar well she does come to visit me quite often 😂

_connorbedard my love ❤ | _connorbedard gorgeous in any position really 😉😏 | y/nhughes 🤫😊 | jackhughes no...🙈 | lhughes_06 take it back 🙉 | _quinnhughes why did i have to read that 👀🙈

taglist: @worldlxvlys @fearfam69691

[kybercrystals94]

They All Fall Down

Read there on AO3!

Febuwhump 2024 | Day 8 | Prompt 8: “Why won’t it stop?”

Rated: G | Words: 1572 | Summary: Stuck in their barracks on Kamino, the cadet Batch try to survive the slow, painful death of boredom. [Character Focus: Cadet Batch]

ADVISEMENT: All training simulations have been canceled for the day, and training rooms are closed. All cadets are ordered to stay in their designated living quarters until further notice. Any and all disturbances during this mandated down time will be dealt with swiftly and with the utmost severity.

Tech reads through the message for the dozenth time, searching for any loophole that he and his brothers might be able to wiggle through to get out of their barracks. They are only scheduled to be cadets for one more standard week. It seemed unfair that they would be held to the same limitations as cadets freshly released from their tubes.

However, the mandate still stands, and Tech’s messages for further clarification have been ignored. It seems they are trapped.

“Hunter,” Wrecker whines, drawing out the last syllable in Hunter’s name to a ridiculous length. “Crosshair won’t stop staring at me.”

Having managed to develop a migraine within the first hour of their imprisonment, Hunter says something from under the pillow he’s sequestered himself to, but his words are suffocated into senseless mumbling.

Crosshair sighs lazily from where he is laying sideways on his bunk, head dropped over the side so that he is looking out at the room upside down. “Stop being such a tubie, Wrecker.”

“I don’t like you staring at me.”

“I’m not staring at you. I’m staring straight ahead.”

“Yeah! Which is at me!”

“If you are sitting in my line of sight, then yes, I’m staring at you. If it bothers you, move.”

“You move! I was sitting here first!”

“No.”

“If you won’t move yourself, I’ll help you,” Wrecker decides, standing up threateningly.

Crosshair smiles. “You just try. Let’s see what happens.”

“May I remind you that disturbances during this time will probably result in lockup,” says Tech.

“Lockup would be better than being stuck in here with him,” Wrecker says, jabbing a finger in Crosshair’s direction.

“Funny, I was about to say the same thing about you.”

“That’s it!” Wrecker yells.

“Hey!” Hunter barks, sitting up and throwing his pillow at Wrecker. His squinting against the light of the room effectively makes him look angrier. “Knock it off, or I’ll turn you both in myself to get some peace and quiet.”

Crosshair huffs and rolls his eyes while Wrecker has the decency to look properly chastised.

Wrecker picks up the weaponized pillow. “Want this back?” he asks Hunter meekly.

Hunter glares at him for several long moments. “No,” he growls before falling back on his bunk and pulling the covers over his head.

A laden hush follows the outburst for approximately five standard minutes.

“You’re still staring at me.”

Tech jumps up and courageously puts himself between his feuding brothers. “We should do a quiet, group activity.”

“Like what?” Crosshair asks dubiously, rolling over and pushing himself up.

“We could play sabaac!” Wrecker suggests excitedly.

Tech casts a weary glance at Hunter’s bunk. “I don’t believe that game would qualify as quiet,” he says.

“What then?” Crosshair stands up and stretches his limbs.

Tech goes and gets the deck of cards. “I’ve been researching some other card games that are more appropriate to quiet environments. Allow me to teach you.”

<<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>>

“Tech, do you have any twos?”

“No. Go fish.”

Wrecker groans and picks up a card from the draw pile. He looks at the card and grins wildly. “Ha! This is the card I wanted. Take that, Tech!” He puts down the set of twos in front of him triumphantly.

“While we are playing individually, I am not actively seeking your demise, Wrecker. If I’d had a two, you would have received it with no argument,” Tech mutters.

Crosshair chuckles. “That’s not how I’ve been playing.”

Tech throws the nearly graduated sniper a look. “Yes, I know that you’ve been actively cheating. Despite the simplicity of the game.”

“It’s not cheating, it’s house rules,” Crosshair says.

“They can only be house rules if the whole house agrees, which Wrecker and I have not.”

“Yeah, Cross! Play right or we’ll kick you out of the game,” Wrecker scolds far too loudly, then claps a hand over his mouth.

The three cadets look apprehensively over at Hunter’s bunk and breathe a sigh of relief when the lump that is their sleeping brother doesn’t move.

Crosshair hisses, “Fine. I’ll play by the dumb rules.”

“Thank you, and your opinion is noted.”

They play three more rounds of the game before they become bored. Wrecker suggests some house rules to change up the game; however, his idea is immediately shot down when Tech and Crosshair realize he is basically describing sabaac.

“If you didn’t get so loud whenever we played, maybe Tech wouldn’t have banned it,” Crosshair says irritably.

“I did not ban it, I just recommend we not play it…” Cutting a glance to Hunter’s bunk, Tech lowers his voice to add, “under the circumstances.”

Wrecker fusses with the cards. “How much longer will we be stuck in our barracks?”

“I’m estimating until late meal,” says Tech.

“That’s not for hours!”

“Shh!”

Hunter shifts and sighs, but seems to remain asleep.

“Maker, Wrecker, why do you have to be so loud all the time?” Crosshair mutters.

Wrecker frowns. “I’m being as quiet as I can.”

“I believe that is accurate,” Tech agrees. “He has been several decibels quieter than his average levels.”

“See?” Wrecker crows.

Crosshair rolls his eyes. “We’re so proud of you.”

“What should we do now?” Wrecker asks. He takes two of the cards and leans them against each other, making a triangular structure.

Tech watches with interest, then smiles. “I have an idea.”

<<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>>

Hunter wakes to the soft chirp of a notification on his data pad. He blinks his eyes open, surprised by the quiet in the barracks. It is never this quiet unless his brothers are gone. Maybe he had slept through the mandatory lockdown, and they had gone to late meal without him. He wouldn’t put it past them, especially after threatening to send them to lockup. Not his finest moment of leadership.

He sits up, rolling his shoulders back to alleviate the stiffness. His migraine is mostly gone, just a lingering ache behind his left eye. He can live with that. Turning to swing his legs over the side of the bunk, Hunter freezes when he sees it: a tower of cards.

And he’s not alone after all.

Crosshair is sitting on Wrecker’s shoulders, reaching up with a card in each hand, poised to place them at the very top of the card palace that nearly reaches the ceiling. It is intricate in its design, with levels and pillars. Hunter is impressed.

“Just a little to the left, Wrecker,” Crosshair says, almost under his breath.

“Carefully,” Tech adds from where he stands across the table from them.

Wrecker shuffles to the left.

“There, good,” Crosshair whispers.

Hunter finds himself holding his breath as Crosshair reaches out and places the cards with the delicate care of an artist.

Hunter grins, reaching for his data pad and taking a holopic. This will be evidence the next time his brothers claim they can’t figure out how to play nice long enough to get anything done.

“That’s it, we did it,” Tech says, “We’ve used every card in our possession to make this structure.”

“We should take a holopic of it,” Wrecker says, almost softly.

“I did,” Hunter says.

He honestly didn’t mean to startle them. He thought that the trained soldiers had seen him sitting up, known they were being observed – even if they hadn’t acknowledged him. He supposes, in hindsight, he shouldn’t have made any such assumptions.

Wrecker nearly jumps out of his skin, which sends Crosshair, still perched on the giant’s shoulders, flailing to keep his balance. Tech whirls around to face Hunter, eyes wide. And all the sudden, combined, swift movements are the house of cards’ demise.

They all watch in devastated anguish as the cards tumble and flutter in soundless destruction. The silence continues long after the last card lands.

Hunter has never felt so small in his entire life.

Tech recovers first. “We knew it was a short-lived endeavor when we undertook the challenge,” he says bravely, but the assurance is thin.

“Would’ve been nice if it lasted longer than two seconds after we finished it though,” Crosshair grumbles, finally slipping down from Wrecker’s shoulders to loom over the carnage.

“I am so sorry,” Hunter says, standing up. “I really didn’t mean to scare you.”

Three sets of eyes look at him, conflicting emotions dancing across their faces.

“We weren’t scared!” Wrecker protests.

Tech averts his gaze. “Correct. We just thought we had inadvertently woken you. We were…surprised.”

Crosshair folds his arms over his chest. “I knew you were awake.”

“Right,” Hunter says, shifting uncomfortably. He holds up the data pad. “I really did get a holopic though.” He looks down at the screen, a notification symbol in the corner. He clicks on it. “And hey, the mandate has been lifted! We can leave the barracks now!”

“Yes, it was lifted two hours ago,” Tech says dismissively, kneeling to begin picking up the scattered remains of what might as well have been their hopes and dreams.

Hunter puts his data pad aside and begins to help gather the cards. “Maybe we can build another one?”

His brothers sigh in unison.

“It will simply not be the same,” Tech verbalizes.

END

✨Let me know if you’d like to be added to my taglist!✨

Taglist: @followthepurrgil @isthereanechoinhere96 @amorfista @mooncommlink @arctrooper69 @nagyanna424 @merkitty49

A/N: If you squint, you can see where I sprinkled the whump in this story XD If you need specifics, I'll just say this: migraine & devastation over lost card tower.

[fishrights69]

My top 5 coolest fish

5. Lionfish🦁

Ah yes, a classic fish found in many books, video games or even in your bathtub if you're tripping hard enough. The only reason I placed this fish here is because the lionfish is very nostalgic to me. Back in the day my mom would sometimes take me to her office where she had one single video game installed: Feeding frenzy. Sadly it was only a demo so if I quit the game, the whole progress would go away :( (which would make me play it for like 5 hours straight as my mom worked). One of the levels had this cool looking mfer and it got printed into my brain from a young age. This Fish gets a 7/10 for looks, 10/10 for reminding me of a simpler time where depression was a foreign concept to me. 4. Galapagos batfish💅🏻

At first you might think ''yo what the fuck is wrong with this thing, is it even fish?'' and yes, it is VERY fish but at the same time it looks kinda fishy. To give you some facts about this little thing, not only does it look like someone put lipstick on it, but it also apparently cannot even swim right. This fish can't even fish and because of that, it is my number 4. 6/10 appearence 9/10 for personal abilities. It reminds me that even if I fuck up at something meant to be ''human'' it s oki , cuz this fish can't even do the one thing it's supposed to do and somehow it's still alive. 3.Flying fish🐦

Now this, this thing is magestic as fuck. Without it's wings it looks like a typical ass fish, but I can still appreciate it for what it tries to be! Imagine how dramatic it can exit boring conversations, or perhaps show up all of a sudden and creep up on you! It makes me summon my inner bad bitch fish self. 8/10 appearence 10/10 I wish I could fly away from my problems as well as this fish can. 2.Pufferfish🌵

This fish is a proper shapeshifter. Imagine being able to adjust your shape on the spot. No stupid diets to make you skinny or fat. Just swallow some water and that's it. On top of that, the spikes are amazing. I wish I had spikes like that in case someone would try to get too close to me on the playground. Their mating ritual is as amazing as it gets but sadly their toxic self cannot be ignored. 8/10 appearence(11/10 if baby), 6/10 too toxic for me tbh but I can still admire from afar 1.Longhorn cowfish🐄

This yellow blob over here is fucking adorable. Not only does it have cow in the name(I love cows too) but he also looks like he is about to give you kisses. Now he is apparently hella lonely which made me feel sorry for him, therefore he is at number 1. because I too was once lonely, smol (still am) and looked like a blob(still do). I fucking hate the colour yellow but this tiny thing makes me like it a little bit more every time I see a pic of him. 10/10 appearence 10/10 resilience, combating loneliness and removing the stigma associated with it. BONUS FISH!!!! Seahorses. Any kind. 🐴

These beautiful things tie super well with my previous fish. You see I really like animals pretending to be other animals and these babies are just that. On top of looking cool as hell, my favorite seahorse fact is that some males can also give birth! Love me some genderbending so keep slaying it babes. ✨ 10/10 looks 10/10 attitude That was it. Follow me if you wanna hear about my top 5 GARBAGE fish that suck.

[simlicious]

Personal update

It's been a while since I wrote a longer personal post, so here we go. Long wall of text incoming!

I am not focused on making patterns so much as I am trying to make a tutorial on making them. Yesterday, I dived into making an explanatory animation and editing a short video clip I recorded. But adding transitions, titles, hints, etc, that stuff takes AGES. I have definitely gained a new level of respect for YouTubers!

Generally, I struggle a lot to get into any project and keep working on it. I'm 95% sure I have ADHD because the struggles I face are textbook ADHD. I have watched a lot of videos recently on ADHD, and especially also how symptoms manifest in women. I was the kid who always daydreamed in school. Who would go "ssssh!" angrily to classmates who were giggling/disrupting, because I got so distracted by it. I had to put all my energy into paying attention. I studied for tests on the last day or during the break before the lesson because I had no motivation beforehand. I had a hard time doing homework, I was just not motivated to do it and made a lot of careless mistakes too, especially with maths.

TBH, I've always felt really bad about showing so many WIPS and getting people's hopes up, and whenever I promise to get them done in a certain timeframe I meant what I said. But I often disappoint myself and you guys too because I often cannot pick up or work on a project. I know I want to finish it and that it would get me a satisfying feeling and probably praise from you guys, but it's still not enough motivation. It's like there is an invisible barrier and I cannot get through it. I often do not know myself why I can't do it. Whenever I do manage to pick up a project, I often have a good experience and at least make some progress on it. But it does not mean the next time is any easier 😭

I have some projects that are almost done, and there is just a little something to do and I just cannot bring myself to finish them. It's really frustrating. I have periods where I can just go with the flow and pick up whatever I can do and do not agonize as much about not being able to tackle bigger projects. But the tutorial project is one of the few goals I set for myself this year, and the year is more than half over already. I want to finally make some progress!

I realized why I am good at making patterns: They take a short amount of time, often between 15 minutes and 4 hours depending on the complexity, though most I can finish in an hour. I do not have to wait long until I can first test the new CC in my game, which is generally a very gratifying experience., since most of the time, the patterns are fine. But whenever they need to be tweaked again, I tend to put that off. It's really hard to pick them up because the gratification is not as high as the initial loading up. My brain is just not getting a high enough dose of dopamine from it, and it's like nope, why bother.

I also get into phases of hyperfocus, and in those, I can work 8 hours straight on a mesh, but once that streak is over... well, RIP WIP. And I can never finish a meshing project in one go. The base mesh might be finished, but then I need to make LODs, morphs, the textures... I often spend an initial 8 hours on one creation, and 20 more to revise stuff later on. I am also bad at judging how much time something takes, with some of my projects it's probably more like 40 hours that went into them already. Most notably a project I titled Exquisite Comfort Sweater. I have revised it 3 times I think, and I am still not done or satisfied with it:

The problems are not obvious from screenshots, there are texture flaws (which can be hidden nicely with patterns, and since the pattern tiling is so good I have used that cardigan often as a way to preview my patterns), but also bone and morph problems. I would not want to release a creation that is broken in my eyes. It might still work for posing and screenshots, but I want people to be able to play with my creations and not get distracted by terrible bone assignments. With this example, the custom bulky sleeves are what create a problem with the bones and morphs. They are just too different from EA's stuff and there is no good reference to clone those from. Hence I need to do manual edits, but that also involves a lot of trial and error. I recently learned how to tweak the bones manually in Blender, so I know I have the tools I need to elevate that to the level where I wanted it all along. But motivating myself to open that blender file still seems impossible.

My perfectionism compels me to enter a loop of creating, testing, seeing something I do not like, and having to do the cycle all over again. Because often, fixing a tiny thing also means I have to redo morphs,. LODS, textures, it takes ages to fix something. And then if I still don't like it, I have to do it a third time. Once my hyperfocus is over, the thing is just left in whatever state it was when I stopped.

I cannot bear to throw away any of my works in progress, because I do go back to some of them sometimes. But it really only happens very rarely that I finish something.

I spend a lot of time meshing and creating stuff, but it just never gets to a releasable state. So I probably have the same experience as someone who has published 100 meshes but I just have nothing to show for it. It sucks so much 😭

And I have been wanting to make tutorials about creating CC for AGES. In the past, I've written down written ones on a whim, but this time, I want to make video tutorials, because most people find them easier to grasp and more digestible. I have good ideas, and I have the knowledge to pass on, it really makes me sad to see so many people wanting to create CC but struggling to find good tutorials and resources. I want to help, I have the knowledge, but I struggle so much with getting things done. I start and I get overwhelmed. I get lost in details. My anxiety perks up. To say this is frustrating is an understatement. Whenever I publish a pattern collection, it feels as huge as writing a term paper. And I feel proud of myself when it is done and out, but it also exhausts me. I really wish I could put out content more frequently. That it wasn't such a huge deal, such a struggle.

I hardly even make goals anymore because most I never reach anyway, because I cannot walk that road. It's like I get off the path and get horribly lost.

And I really am sorry about not being able to keep promises. I often don't even mention stuff I am working on, but I sometimes do need the input/dopamine from my lovely blog readers to keep going.

I think if I declare a deadline, that will help me finish a project. It sometimes works, but then sometimes it does not. And it sometimes makes me want to write "unreliable" in my tumblr profile, but that feels so harsh and I need to show compassion toward myself if I want to make progress.

Lately, I have watched a lot of "tips and strategies for ADHD" videos. One video addressed something very important: the fact that people with ADHD can get bored with a certain strategy and then it just does not work anymore. So I cannot trust a habit to work forever, because out of the blue, that trusty strategy may just stop working.

Finding strategies that work is difficult, and getting into a new habit is even harder. I feel like life is rigged against me and my struggles are mostly unseen because my wins are not flashy at all. For me, cleaning my apartment is a big deal. Taking a walk with my best friends 2 times a week feels like a full week. We even go when it's raining. Two years ago, I would never thought this possible, but this shows me that I am making progress. The progress is just in areas that remain unseen, that do not produce big results, nothing to put in a resume, or in a portfolio.

I'm writing all this because I have been especially upset and frustrated with my inability to work lately. And I'm sad that I cannot create the resources for you the way I want to. That everything takes me so much longer than I anticipated. That I make promises that I cannot keep.

I need to get my frustrations out of my system so I can focus on small wins and hope they eventually add up to a big one.

If you happen to know some good ADHD resources or strategies that you have experience with, feel free to share them, they are much appreciated!

[anneapocalypse]

1, 2, 4, 8, 19 for the dav meme!

Veilguard Hype Ask Meme!

What was the first Dragon Age game you played?

Origins! I've been here since the beginning. Alongside Fallout 3, it was one of the first RPG video games that absolutely ate my brain. I have fond memories of sitting on my futon playing DAO for like 16 hours straight, forgetting to eat and destroying my back.

2. Which Dragon Age game is your favorite so far?

This is always such a hard question for me to answer, because the three games are all so different, and I have deeply fond memories of all three of them, and I can also look at all three pretty frankly and see their flaws even as I still enjoy them. I think if I have to name a favorite though, it's still Dragon Age 2. Something about its structure and scale, the creative and unusual use of place and time, and its themes, really appeals to me. I've also come to really like the personality lock-in feature even though it does place some limitations on role-playing, and I love the friendship-rivalry system. I love it so much. I think it makes for much more interesting character relationships than simply "Does this character approve or disapprove of my actions?" Are there things about the other games that I prefer, of course. I want to be able to play as an elf or a dwarf or a qunari, for one. But even after all this time, DA2 still hits me a certain way. I love the other two games as well. There's just something about Kirkwall.

4. What does your worldstate look like going into DAV?

So I have like five or six world states and I don't consider any one of them more canon than the others, but I will be going into Veilguard for the first time with Rogues Gallery, which is exactly what it sounds like (and which means the one thing I know about my Rook is they'll be a rogue), featuring Jolene Cousland, Mallory Hawke, and Calla Cadash.

Basic rundown:

The Circle was saved, Connor and Isolde both lived, Zathrian broke the curse, and Harrowmont is King of Orzammar.

Jo romanced Alistair and convinced him to do the Dark Ritual.

They stayed Grey Wardens and rode off into the sunset together.

Anora is Queen of Ferelden.

Nathaniel is alive.

The Architect was spared.

Vigil's Keep and Amaranthine were protected.

Jo went off alone to find a cure for the Calling, and Alistair was left in the Fade.

Carver is dead, Bethany is alive and a Grey Warden.

Mal romanced Isabela. (In my headcanon, they later become a polycule with Merrill but of course that's not in the game.)

She rivaled everyone except the rogues and Merrill.

Bartrand is dead. Varric kept a piece of the idol.

Aveline did not marry Donnic.

Feynriel went to the Dalish, and then to Tevinter.

Clan Sabrae was killed.

Merrill did not destroy the Eluvian.

Mal refused to take any kind of a stand until the very end of Act III where she heaved a big sigh and sided with the mages.

She disapproved of Anders' actions but spared his life.

Mal is still alive and kicking.

Calla romanced Josephine.

She conscripted the rebel mages and the Grey Wardens.

Alistair was left in the Fade.

I left off with her right before Wicked Eyes and Wicked Hearts, so I am not sure of her decisions from her onward! But I do plan to finish this playthrough before Veilguard comes out. :)

8. What faction are you most excited to learn more about?

I'm pretty hype about all of them, but I'd say the Lords of Fortune and the Veil Jumpers the most since we know the least about them!

19. Are you planning to replay any of the previous games, watch Dragon Age: Absolution, or read any of the books/comics/short stories, or are there other games you want to play in the meantime?

I do plan to finish my current playthrough of Inquisition (Calla's playthrough) which is still incomplete. Beyond that, maybe I'll re-read some of my favorite Tevinter Nights stories. I spent about three years (2020-2023) playing the whole series on repeat like 5-6 times and reading and watching all the side content I could get my hands on, so... I'm probably good on that front. ;)

Final Fantasy XIV is getting a new expansion, Dawntrail, in just a couple weeks, so that should occupy a good chunk of my summer, and I expect I'll be ready to play some more Dragon Age in the fall in preparation for Veilguard! (Would love to get an actual release date, though.)

[natalieironside]

Masters of the World, part 1

Hey there, Age of Mythology fans! You can head on over to https://www.patreon.com/posts/77895021 and download the first map in a campaign I been working on (nothing is for sale, I'm just hosting it there while I work on my big-girl website)

Heyyy everybody, here's one of my side projects!  I'm making a custom campaign for the super great historical fantasy RTS game Age of Mythology: Extended Edition,which I'm pretty sure at least one other person on Earth still plays.  You can get it here if you don't have it:  https://store.steampowered.com/app/266840/Age_of_Mythology_Extended_Edition/  It's been a lifelong favorite since I was a kid and it's a great relic of the early 2000s RTS golden age; highly recommend.  Once you've got the base game plus the Titans and Tales Of The Dragon xpacks, you can just drop this bad boy into the "scenarios" folder in your game files and you'll be good to go.  More on the technical issues in a minute, but if you run into any problems try opening it in the editor and just selecting one of Player 1's units and that should fix it. 

First, a word on the production.  To put it bluntly the AoM scenario editor absolutely stinks.  A lot of stuff just straight up doesn't work.  For one thing, I've confirmed with other mapmakers that the campaign maker is irreparably broken and the only way to knit all the scenarios into a campaign is to manually write an XML document, which . . . I am not doing that.  Also, a lot of the text-based storytelling elements from AoE2 were cut and replaced with visual ones, and listen Ensemble Studios I love you but I am not going to sit here for hours and make an entire claymation movie one if-then statement at a time.

All this is to say that this scenario is not done, but it is as done as it's ever going to get, so I'm just gonna send it.

Masters of the World part 1 is a single-player battle royale (well technically it's 1v1v1v1v1v3 but who's counting) build-and-destroy map with 7 AI players.  Much like Swords of Outremer, I went a little wild with this one and as a consequence it's mad chunky.  I recommend playing with your video settings turned alllll the way down.  Also much like Swords of Outremer, I used an RMS for the skeleton; this one is Alfheim.  I'm planning on telling this story in about 7 or 8 single-player maps, and you can expect Masters of the World part 2: The Fields of Pentecost sometime soonish.

***

Masters of the World is a high fantasy scenario where you play as Ajax Ironroot, king of the dwarves, who has come south out of his mountains to deal with an ancient threat:  The Master of the World.  The Masters, a band of mighty and nigh godlike wizards, lorded over by the mysterious figure known only as "the Wizard," have long scourged the land and laid it waste as they vie against each other for ultimate mastery.  Ajax, afraid that this destruction may spread across his borders, will march forth to challenge the Masters on their own terms . . . But, to challenge them means becoming a Master of the World oneself.  

Featuring a robust cast of characters, including the vain and proud Lady Pentecost, queen of the elves, and the mysterious vampire lord Gretta, Duchess of Shadows, as well as various and sundry other original the characters (do not steal).  If you like protracted mountain sieges and massive endgame doomstack fights, like I do, this should serve; during playtesting I let the AI duke it out amongst themselves and they whupped on one another with no clear contender for like 6 or 7 hours until the game ran out of memory and crashed. 

Have fun and let me know what you think!  :)

[sugar-omi]

i have a handful of songs i love listening to while playing olba (to the point where i cant listen to them without thinking about cove LOL) and i think kissaphobic by make out monday is just. cove's anthem, basically. it perfectly encapsulates his anxiety over being romantic with the MC when they start dating. it especially fits for when you're dancing with cove at the charity event, even if ur not dating yet

*link | *lyics

first of all. the way the MV is a prom setting is CRAZY. BUT THE FUCKING VOCALS IS CRAZIER ITS SO FUCKING GOOD WHAT THE FUCK

i.. am adding this to my playlist. wow. please share what other songs you listen to bc you must be holding onto a treasure trove !??!

but wow.. this is so cove, youre so right. it's so perfect to portray his anxiety, and that verse

" But I can't get too close to you my darling, can't get too close And God help me if I do, you'll leave me broken hearted You'll leave me stitching my lips up again, "

it makes me think of at the end of step 3, when cove doubts if your relationship will last. idk how many of you have seen it, but i believe theres a post where GB said MC is the only one cove would date n that otherwise, he remains single.

you just know that cove and MC breaking up (or not being friends, or never dating) would be a kill his heart. like i hate rejecting cove in step 4 after crushing the entire game, because imagine loving someone most of your life!!!

it's your entire life as far as you're concerned! those 8 years before cove n MC met wouldn't mean anything because it'd be a total haze, all those years spent together with something sparking between em... n still never coming to fruition. EVEN WORSE. MC ending up with derek or baxter after all that (i'm more so thinking of when he says "I'm fine now" after you date baxter, at the end of baxter's DLC during the party for anyone who doesn't know what part he says that.)

god my heart would shatter if i was him

jfc you're making me spiral LOL IT'S SO GOOD. ok gbye imma go play this on loop for hours straight

[alexissara]

Quick Review: Stray Gods

Stray Gods is among the rare, the few, the musical video game. This is a visual novel/musical that reinvents Greek myth and provides a modern story about reincarnation, trauma, pain, murder, mystery and romance. The games gameplay is very simply put, making choices, there isn't more to it then that but the choices feel impactful.

I played one run with my GF and my Metamore romancing Persephone. After that run I did listen on youtube to more of the outcomes and possibilities [in particular the rest of the Freddie romance] but have not replayed it or anything like that. I feel like I got everything I wanted from the game with just that alone but maybe one day I'll revisit. We had a play time of roughly 8 hours but a lot of time was us talking over choices together or on a pause menu the game is fairly shorter than that if your playing it solo. Especially if you just lock in on one person you wanna grab romantically. Even more so in further playthroughs where you aren't going to need to ask as many questions.

The games music is good but I don't think there is a lot of stand out banger songs. Like I am not really belting these songs out in my head or wanting to rewatch the song over and over like with many other musical moments in animated series or from proper musicals. I really love You and I (Reprise) and that is the one song that atm has returned to my head. I think a large part of why the songs aren't super sticking with me though is that the tone of the songs are mostly more somber and mellow where I prefer a more action packed or upbeat song from my musicals. I do think the songs can feel a little weird because their designed in pieces to fit together by player choices but when you listen to them on the soundtrack they do pretty much all clear.

The queerness in Stray Gods is better than average, a progress pride flag exists in Freddie and Grace's room but that flag is a generic pride flag not putting a particular label on Freddie or Grace's sexuality. As far as I can tell no character uses any labels one can assume Grace is bi in so much that she can romance 2 men and 2 women but perhaps they want you to self insert your sexuality into her. Still it would have been nice to talk more about sexuality in this game especially when talking about passing down Eidolons and stuff. Perhaps it's too messy of a topic but it was something in my head. We do some a touch of unavoidable queerness with Persephone having a past lover who is a woman who as far as I know is not at all optional to miss. That said Freddie's feelings for Grace are pretty unavoidable but I know straight people aren't very smart so I do think they could somehow miss it. The game also sadly lacks polyamory despite being about Greek gods and that not making any sense.

Overall, I think the game is really well voice acted and good experience. I recommend listening to a song or two online to see if the music clicks with you because you probably won't want to play the game if you don't enjoy that since it's the main event. It's a fun time with a good cast and fairly simple. The story can get fairly dark with suicidal ideation, PTSD, Abuse, etc all being themes but for me they were all handled well but perhaps that was how we handled choices. I really like the game overall and I will probably be on the hunt for Grace X Freddie and Grace X Persephone art for however long people keep drawing it.

If you enjoyed this review feel free to check out my Patreon or Ko-fi for more stuff like this.

[firsttimewriter92]

Explaining brown eyes

Recently I got a comment on my fic ´Neighborly shenanigans´, asking why I write Simon Riley having brown eyes instead of blue.

I would like to explain why I do that, cause it scratches some topics I´d like to address.

First of all: I haven´t played the games, so I can´t say that I´ve seen Ghost in every possible angle in every possible lighting.

What I did see was 5 to 8 hour long Cutscene Movies and Play alongs to get a feeling for the franchise and the characters that I´ve come to adore.

When Ghost is wearing his skull mask, the light almost never reaches his eyes to determine weather they are blue or not.

He removes it for the first time at the los vaqueros hideout. There is light coming from the right, illuminating his blond lashes and I´m sorry...those eyes look pretty dark to me:

There are several occasions in the game where we get close ups like this with Soap and Price as well. They clearly are depicted with blue eyes, so in my opinion, if they wanted the same for Simon, they would have just done it, right?

Another example is the bar they all gather at in the end. When Simon sees the picture of Makarov and momentarily looks straight into the camera, his eyes appear almost black. I do however see how this could be an illusion due to the lighting.

Lastly: Simon Ghost Riley is a fictional character with a lot of mystery and backstory to him. He is depicted in so many stories and so many art pieces. Everyone of us has their own version of him in our heads and that is fine. That´s the point!

If it is canon that his eyes are blue, then that´s fine with me. My bad. In that case my fic just has a minor flaw that I will not change. It´s nothing major.

If some people however think that the blue eyes are canon because the actor who plays him has blue eyes then that´s where my tolerance ends!

I am not writing him with the actor in mind. I´m not writing about the actor. That´s weird and depending on the fic a little disgusting. That is a real life person with a private life. We as fans of the franchise need to respect that.

Creativity should be the one thing we can all agree on. If you write about a fictional character or make art of him, especially one where his face is canonically not known, please feel free to interpret him to your hearts content. As far as I´m concerned I love reading and seeing so many different versions of him. Blue eyes or dark eyes. If it doesn´t fit into my perspective of him but I like the fic or art, I simply ignore it and enjoy someone else´s hard work.

Alright, I´ve been ranting about this for too long now. I hope this explains why I write Simon with brown eyes instead of blue. Because to me, they are not CLEARLY blue.

Thanks for indulging in my ranting <3 :D

P.S.:

His eyes in the comics that explain his backstory are brown:

[the-mighty-mittens]

I did a bunch of Castoff incorrect quotes, you wanna see?

Of course you do

1

Marina: Pick a card, any card.

Rori: Fine.

Marina: Wait, that's my credit card!

Rori: You said any card.

2

Marina: *running towards Arianna with open arms*

Arianna: *moves out of the way*

Marina: Hey, why'd you move?!

Arianna: I thought you were going to attack me.

Marina: I was going to hug you!

Arianna: Why would you hug me?

Marina: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?

3

*when a child starts crying in public*

Sage: *tries to make the child laugh*

Frankie: *tries to play a game with the child to make them calm down*

Marina: *gives detailed instructions to the parents*

Rori: *cries with the child*

Arianna: *ignores the child*

Vector: *is the reason why the child is crying*

4

Vector: Man, it smells like wrongdog out here.

Arianna:

Arianna: Vector, are you alright?

Vector: *sobs*

5

Vector: A sprite is anything not static.

Sage: A sprite is a variable object, be it 2d or 3d.

Rori: A sprite is a fucking soda.

Rori: You god damn geekass bastards.

6

Vector: Does anyone know how to relax? Asking for a friend.

7

Vector: *walks to cabinet, removes oreo box, takes half a sleeve, throws empty box out* Hi!

Rori: Hey- what are you doing-?

Vector, shoving an oreo into their mouth: I am saving space :D

8

Rori: I’ve been described as a ‘heartless villain’ and a 'little shit’, but I prefer… 'has alternative ways of having fun’.

9

Rori: You’re kind of a pushover, aren’t you, Vector?

Vector: …I’m sorry.

Rori: See!? That’s exactly what I’m talking about!

10

Arianna: Can you PLEASE peer pressure me into doing my project?

Sage: Do it or you're straight.

Arianna: I said peer pressure, NOT THREATEN!

11

Arianna: Oh, so when crows remember people who wronged them and hold grudges, its “intelligent” and “really cool”.

Arianna: But when I do it, I’m “petty” and “need to let it go”.

12

Vector, texting Arianna: Arianna there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it?

Vector: Pls hurry because I’m going to cry

Vector: Arianna

Vector: Arianna

Arianna: Arianna is dead. You’re next. Love, Moth.

13

Rori: Did you just call me a shrimp, you asshole?! I'm still growing, dammit!

14

Arianna: That's it, I'm cutting off the internet!

Frankie: No, please don't! I have a family to feed!

Arianna:

Arianna: What?

Frankie: I need to feed my Neopets!

15

Arianna: You know you've made it when you see your picture everywhere you go.

Marina: Those are wanted posters!

16

Marina: An apple a day keeps the doctor away!

Rori: An apple a day can keep anyone away if you throw it hard enough.

17

Vector: *eating a cinnamon roll*

Arianna: Cannibalism.

Vector: *confused chewing noises*

18

Sage: Where is Vector?

Marina: I'll do you one better, who is Vector??

Rori: Here's a better question, why is Vector?

19

Arianna: BEHOLD, the field in which I grow my fucks! Lay thine eyes upon it, and thou shalt see that it is barren!

20

Vector: Arianna.. I'm gonna cry!

Arianna: Please don't.

Vector, crying: Request denied.

21

Arianna: Respect my trans homies or I’m gonna identify as a fucking problem.

22

Vector: What’s it like being tall?

Rori: Is it nice?

Vector: Can you reach comfortably for the cupboards?

Frankie: We live in constant fear of the short ones who, in my experience, will climb four chairs, two boxes, a small coffee table, and six oddly placed stools to get what they want.

23

*in a group chat*

Marina: First one to reply is gat.

Marina: *gay

Marina: Wait...

24

Marina: What did you get on your shirt?

Rori: Rust.

Marina: From what?

Rori: Weapons.

Arianna: Time for more adult supervision.

Bonus Zebra herd quotes!

25

Zera: "You look tired" well, the torment is relentless and the horrors never cease.

26

Zera: Hi, who's this? Terran changed all of my contacts to mythical creatures.

Liam: What's mine?

Zera: Dwarf.

Liam: THEY'RE SO MEAN, I'M NOT THAT SHORT!

Zera: Oh, hey Liam.

Liam: FUCK!

27

Liam: Oh gosh I wish I got more sleep I only got six hours!

Sonja: Six? I only got three!

Terran: You guys got sleep?

Zera, comes stumbling out of their room and grabs a jug of coffee before saying: What year is it??

28

Terran: Do you guys want to see a butterfly?

Liam: Ooh, yes please!

Zera, with their laptop open: I'm not going to stop working to look at a stupid bug!

Terran: It's not a bug though...

Zera: ...

Liam: ...

Zera: Well I still don't want to see.

Liam, realizing: Please don't throw-

Terran: Whee! *throws a stick of butter*

29

Zera: Self-care is suppressing all your trauma until it comes back and hits you in the face with the force of 7 very large trucks.