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itsreigns · 4 years ago

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Blurred Lines - Part 12

Henry Cavill x Reader

Henry especifically told (Y/N) that he didn’t do relationships. But lines get blurred. And crossed.

Warnings: Slight AU. Shameless Fluff.

Words: 1,241

Cavill Squad:

@wardl0w | @tryingtofindaplaceinthisworld | @shadow-of-wonder |

The day after Henry and I found out about my pregnancy, I scheduled my first appointment with my obstetrician. We’re finally going to see our baby! I’m so excited for today. But also so scared.

I just want the baby to be healthy, for everything to be ok with us. That’s all I’m asking. I know it sounds like I’m being negative, but I’m not. I’m so goddamn happy that I’m equally terrified of it all going wrong.

I seriously couldn’t wait to finally see the growing ball of sunshine in my tummy. And Henry was ecstatic too. I love seeing him like this. There’s a special sparkle in his eyes all the time, and always a soft, gentle smile on his face. His whole body radiates happiness.

I can’t stop the smile from forming on my lips once that thought crosses my mind. I’m currently cooking breakfast, some scrambled eggs and toast, obviously a cup of coffee, for me and Henry. He’s been staying over lately. Basically, he pretty much lives at my house now. And, to be honest, I like it this way.

“Those eggs must be telling you some amazing jokes.” Henry jokes as he wraps his arms around my midsection from behind, planting a few kisses on my cheek.

“I’m just happy, Henry.” I reply simply, feeling emotional. Feeling the warmth of his body against mine makes me feel the most safe and alive I’ve ever been.

He turns my body gently so I’m facing him, then he cups my face with his hand. “I’m happy too, love. So happy.” He whispers, leaning in and kissing me deeply for a couple of seconds, before I cut him off.

“Henry, the eggs!” I chuckle, pushing him away and getting out of his grasp. He puts his hands up as if he wasn’t doing anything, chuckling too.

I switch the stove off and get the eggs and toasts on our respective plates, as he sets the rest of the table and sits down, waiting patiently for me.

“Here.” I say as I set the plates down. He mumbles a soft thank you and he dives into his dish and coffee.

I start eating as well, a comfortable silence surrounding us. But some time later, I notice he’s completely lost in thought. His gaze is focused on the cup of coffee, I think? And it says that way for a few minutes. I try to read him, study his features, but I can’t figure it out.

“Henry? Baby?” I call him out gently, cupping his hand with my smaller one. Once we touch, he finally snaps out of it and locks his gaze with mine. “Everything ok?”

“Yeah. Yeah.” He clears his throat, putting a smile on his face. “I just… I want to ask you something… Or suggest something to you. But I don’t know how to put it.”

“Just say it, Henry. Whatever it is, we’ll talk it through and work it out.” I smile, tugging on his hand for support. I’m not going to lie, I’m scared shitless of what he’s going to say, but I kind of have a feeling that it’s not a bad thing. Call it sixth sense, a hunch or whatever.

“I want you to know that I’m putting my house on the market.” He informs simply, watching the new information settle in my features and reading my reaction intently. I thought he loved his house, it held so many important memories to him. I never thought he’d want to sell it.

“Oookay.” I reply with a somewhat confused smile. “So, you want to move in? With me?” I ask him, still genuinely confused, urging him to continue.

“No.” He replies simply. My face falls instantly, and he notices that quickly. “I mean yes. Just not here.” He adds, trying to be clearer about what he meant, but I’m more confused than ever. “Look, I love my house. And I know you love your house too. But our family is growing and I love you guys, so much.” He explains slowly as if taking his time for me to follow his line of thought. “I want to start over, in a new place, with you and our baby. Make new memories, our memories.”

“You mean… you want to buy a house?” I ask, still trying to make sense of what I just heard, and he nods, confirming. “For us?” He nods again.

I know I sound stupid, but I just never thought about buying a whole new house. We’re pretty much living together now, so I didn’t even think about it. And like I said, I never even thought he’d want to sell his own house. But now… hearing this, I’m feeling emotional. Our family. Me, Henry and our baby. My family.

“Baby, it’s ok if you don’t want to do this right now, we can just postpone this and talk about it some other time.” Henry explains soothingly, now being his turn to caress my hand.

“No, I want to. I’m just overwhelmed, I’m sorry. This baby is already kicking mama’s ass.” I giggle through the tears. He plants a kiss on my forehead, and I can feel his smile against my skin. “But yeah, let’s list our houses and find our home.”

“Really?” He asks just wanting to make sure he heard me right, so I nod effusively. “Oh my God, I love you so much.” He whispers as he kneels down next to my chair, and wraps his arms around me.

I’m still sitting so he rests his head against my chest, hugging me tight. “I love you too, Henry.” I run my fingers through his curly hair, pressing light kisses into it. I don’t think it’s possible to be happier than I am right now. This is more than I ever wished for, more than I could ever ask for.

“I love when you cuddle me, love, but we need to go get ready, or we’re going to be late.” He pulls back and gets up, then helps me up as well. “And you know mommy and daddy are eager to meet this baby.” He smiles widely, caressing my small baby bump.

“Yes, they are.” I agree, covering his hand with mine, feeling emotional all over again. Damn hormones. “We love you so much already.”

“We really do.” Henry adds, with emotion in his features as well. “Now, let’s go, love! Move, move! Dr. Barrett is expecting us at 9:00AM and it’s already 8:15AM.”

I laugh at his nervous and energetic state. It’s really adorable. “Henry, we take literally 15 minutes to get to the clinic. We’re going to be on time.”

“I know, I’m just making sure.” He shrugs it off, a grin in his face as he takes his jeans out of the closet.

Mirroring his grin, I pick up my clothes as well. I just can’t get the smile off my face. I’m smiling all the time.

Ten minutes later, I’m almost finished with getting ready when Henry calls me up. “Babeeeeee! We need to go!”

“I’m coming!” I chuckle as I take a glance in the mirror, then looking down at my bump. “God, I can’t wait to see your daddy’s reaction when it’s time for you to be born.”

In less than 30 minutes, we’d be seeing our baby for the very first time. We can’t wait.

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Part 13???

#blurred lines #blurred lines fic #henry cavill imagine #henry cavill x reader #henry cavill fic #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fanfiction #henry cavill one shot #henry cavill oneshot

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96harmony96 · 3 years ago

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Chapter 3

when Megumi and I stepped into an elevator, I hit the button for the top floor.

“I’ll be back in five minutes, if anyone asks,” I told her, as she stepped off at Waters Field & Leaman.

“Give her a kiss for me, will you?” she said, playfully fanning herself. “Makes me hot just thinking about living vicariously through you.”

I managed a smile before the doors closed and the car continued its ascent. When it reached the end of the line, I exited into a tastefully ornate and undeniably masculine entrance foyer. Smoky glass security doors were sandblasted with jauregui INDUSTRIES and softened by hanging baskets of ferns and lilies.

lauren ’s redheaded receptionist was unusually cooperative and buzzed me in before I reached the door. Then she grinned at me in a way that got my back up. I’d always gotten the impression she didn’t like me, so I didn’t trust that smile for a minute. It made me twitchy. Still, I waved and said hello, because I wasn’t a catty bitch—unless I was given good reason to be.

I took the long hallway that led to lauren , stopping at a large secondary reception area where his secretary, Scott, manned the desk.

Scott stood as I approached. “Hello, camila,” she greeted me, reaching for his phone. “I’ll let her know you’re here.”

The glass wall that separated lauren ’s office from the rest of the floor was usually crystal clear but could be made opaque with the push of a button. It was frosted now, which increased my uneasiness. “Is she alone?”

“Yes, but—”

Whatever else he said was lost as I pushed through the glass door and into lauren ’s domain. It was a massive space, with three distinct seating areas, each larger than my boss Mark’s entire office. In contrast to the elegant warmth of lauren ’s apartment, his office was decorated in a cool palette of black, gray, and white broken only by the jewel-toned crystal decanters that decorated the wall behind a bar.

Floor-to-ceiling windows overlooked the city on two sides. The one solid wall opposite the immense desk was covered in flat screens streaming news channels from around the world.

My gaze swept the room and caught on the throw pillow that had been carelessly knocked to the floor. Beside it were indents in the area rug that betrayed where the couch feet were usually planted. The piece of furniture had, apparently, been bumped askew by a few inches.

My heart rate sped up and my palms grew damp. That awful anxiety I’d felt earlier intensified.

I had just noticed the open door to the washroom when lauren stepped into view, stealing my breath with the beauty of his exposed torso. His hair was damp, as if from a recent shower, and his neck and upper chest were still flushed, as it became when she exerted herself physically.

she froze when she saw me, his gaze darkening for an instant before his perfect, implacable mask slid effortlessly into place.

“It’s not a good time, camila,” she said, shrugging into a dress shirt she’d had draped over the back of a bar stool . . . a different shirt from the one she’d been wearing earlier that morning. “I’m running late to an appointment.”

I gripped my purse tightly. Seeing her so intimately brought home how badly I wanted her. I loved her insanely, needed her like I needed to breathe . . . which only made it easier for me to understand how Magdalene and Corinne felt, and to relate to any lengths they might go to in trying to lure her away from me. “Why are you half dressed?”

There was no help for it. My body responded instinctively to the sight of his, which made it even harder for me to rein in my rioting emotions. His open, neatly pressed dress shirt revealed golden skin stretched tightly over washboard abs and perfectly defined pectorals. A dusting of dark hair over his chest arrowed down and darkened into a thin line, leading to a cock presently encased in boxer briefs and slacks. Just thinking about how she felt inside me made me ache with longing.

“I got something on my shirt.” she began buttoning up, his abs flexing with his movements as she crossed over to the bar, where I saw his cuff links waiting. “I have to run. If you need something, let Scott know and she’ll see to it. Or I’ll take care of it when I get back. I shouldn’t be more than two hours.”

“Why are you running late?”

she didn’t look at me when she answered, “I had to squeeze in a last-minute meeting.”

Did you now? “You showered this morning.” After making love to me for an hour.“Why did you have to shower again?”

“Why the inquisition?” she snapped.

Needing answers, I went to the washroom. The lingering humidity was oppressive. Ignoring the voice in my head telling me not to look for trouble I couldn’t bear to find, I dug his shirt out of the laundry basket . . . and saw red lipstick smeared like a bloodstain on one of the cuffs. Pain twisted through my chest.

Dropping the garment on the floor, I pivoted and left, needing to get as far away from lauren as possible. Before I threw up or started sobbing.

“camila!” she snapped as I hurried past her. “What the hell is the matter with you?”

“Fuck you, asswipe.”

“Excuse me?”

My hand was on the door handle when she caught me, yanking me back by the elbow. Spinning, I slapped her with enough force to turn his head and set my palm on fire.

“Goddamn it,” she growled, grabbing me by the arms and shaking me. “Don’t fucking hit me!”

“Don’t touch me!” The feel of his bare hands on the bare skin of my arms was too much.

she shoved back and away from me. “What the fuck’s gotten into you?”

“I saw her, lauren .”

“Saw who?”

“Corinne!”

she scowled. “What are you talking about?”

Pulling my smartphone out, I thrust the photo in his face. “Busted.”

lauren ’s gaze narrowed on the screen, and then his scowl cleared. “Busted doing what, exactly?” she asked, too softly.

“Oh, screw you.” I turned toward the door, shoving my phone in my purse. “I’m not spelling it out for you.”

His palm slapped against the glass, holding the door closed. Caging me with his body, she leaned down and hissed in my ear, “Yes. Yes, you goddamn will spell it out.”

I squeezed my eyes shut as our position at the door brought back a flood of heated memories from the first time I’d been in lauren ’s office. she’d stopped me just like this, seducing me deftly, drawing us into a passionate embrace on the very couch that had recently seen some kind of action forceful enough to shove it out of position.

“Doesn’t a picture say a thousand words?” I bit out through clenched teeth.

“So Corinne was manhandled. What does that have to do with me?”

“Are you kidding me? Let me out.”

“I don’t find anything even remotely funny about this. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever been this pissed off at a woman. You come in here with your half-assed accusations and self-righteous bullshit—”

“I am righteous!” I twisted around and ducked beneath his arm, putting some much-needed distance between us. Being close to her hurt too much. “I would never cheat on you! If I wanted to fuck around, I’d break it off with you first.”

Leaning into the door, lauren crossed his arms. His shirt remained untucked and open at the collar, a look I found hot and tempting, which only made me angrier.

“You think I cheated on you?” His tone was clipped and icy.

I sucked in a deep breath to get through the pain of imagining her with Corinne on the sofa behind me. “Explain to me why she was here at the Crossfire, looking like she did. Why your office looks like this. Why you look like that.”

His gaze went to the couch, then to the cushion on the floor, then back to me. “I don’t know why Corinne was here or why she looked like that. I haven’t seen her since last night, when you were with me.”

Last night seemed like it’d happened forever ago. I wished that it had never happened at all.

“But I wasn’t with you,” I pointed out. “She batted her eyelashes and said she wanted to introduce you to someone, and you left me standing there.”

“Christ.” His eyes blazed. “Not this again.”

I swiped angrily at a tear that slid down my cheek.

she growled. “You think I went with her because I was overcome with the need to be with her and get away from you?”

“I don’t know, lauren . You ditched me. You’re the one with the answers.”

“You ditched me first.”

My mouth fell open. “I did not!”

“The hell you didn’t. Almost the second we arrived, you took off. I had to hunt you down and when I did, you were dancing with that prick.”

“Martin is Stanton’s nephew!” And since Richard Stanton was my stepdad, I thought of Martin as family.

“I don’t care if he’s a damned priest. He wants to nail you.”

“Oh my God. That’s absurd! Stop deflecting. You were talking business with your associates. It was awkward standing there. For them as well as me.”

“That’s your place, awkward or not!”

My head jerked back as if she’d slapped me. “Come again?”

“How would you feel if I walked away from you at a Waters Field and Leaman party because you started talking about a campaign? Then, when you found me, I was slow dancing with Magdalene?”

“I—” God. I hadn’t thought of it like that.

lauren appeared smooth and unruffled with his powerful frame lounging against the door, but I could sense the anger vibrating beneath that calm surface. she was riveting always, but most especially when she was seething with passion. “It’s my place to stand beside you, and support you, and yes, just fucking look pretty on your arm sometimes. It’s my right, my duty, and my privilege, camila, just as it’s yours in reverse.”

“I thought I was doing you a favor by getting out of the way.”

His arched brow was a silent, sarcastic comeback.

My arms crossed in front of me. “Is that why you walked off with Corinne? Were you punishing me?”

“If I wanted to punish you, camila, I’d take you over my knee.”

My gaze narrowed. That was never going to happen.

“I know how you get,” she said curtly. “I didn’t want you jealous over Corinne before I had a chance to explain. I needed a few minutes to make sure she understood how serious you and I are, and how important it was to me that you enjoy the evening. That’s the only reason I walked away with her.”

“You told her not to say anything about you two, didn’t you? You told her to keep quiet about what she is to you. Too bad Magdalene screwed that up.”

And maybe Corinne and Magdalene had planned it that way. Corinne knew lauren well enough to anticipate his moves; it might’ve been easy for her to plan around his reaction to her unexpected appearance in New York.

Which shed a whole new light on why Magdalene had called me today. She and Corinne had been talking at the Waldorf when lauren and I spotted them. Two women who wanted a man who was with another woman. Nothing was going to happen for them while I was in the picture, and because of that, I couldn’t rule out the possibility that they might be working together.

“I wanted you to hear it from me,” she said tightly.

I waved that off, more concerned about what was happening now. “I saw Corinne get into the Bentley, lauren . Right before I came up here.”

His other brow rose to match the first. “Did you?”

“Yes, I did. Can you explain that?”

“I can’t, no.”

Injured fury burned through me. I suddenly couldn’t bear to even look at her. “Then get out of my way, I have to get back to work.”

she didn’t move. “I just want to be clear on something before you go: Do you believe I fucked her?”

Hearing her say it aloud made me flinch. “I don’t know what to believe. The evidence sure—”

“I wouldn’t care if the ‘evidence’ included you finding me and her naked in a bed together.” she uncoiled so swiftly, I stumbled back in surprise. she stalked closer. “I want to know if you think I fucked her. If you think I would. Or could. Do you?”

My foot began to tap, but I didn’t retreat. “Explain the lipstick on your shirt, lauren .”

His jaw tightened. “No.”

“What?” The flat-out refusal sent me into a tailspin.

“Answer my question.”

I studied his face and saw the mask she wore around other people but had never worn with me. she reached his hand toward me as if to brush my cheek with his fingertips, then pulled back at the last minute. In that brief instant in which she pulled away, I heard his teeth grind, as if not touching me was a struggle. Agonized, I was grateful she hadn’t.

“I need you to explain,” I whispered, wondering if I imagined the wince that crossed his face. Sometimes I wanted to believe something so badly, I deliberately manufactured excuses and ignored painful reality.

“I’ve given you no reason to doubt me.”

“You’re giving me one now, lauren .” I exhaled in a rush, deflating. Withdrawing. she was standing in front of me, but she seemed miles away. “I understand you need time before you share secrets that are painful for you. I’ve been where you’re at, knowing I needed to talk about what happened to me but just not ready. That’s why I’ve tried very hard not to push you or rush you. But this secret is one that’s hurting me, and that’s different. Don’t you see that?”

Cursing under his breath, she cupped my face with cool hands. “I go out of my way to make sure you don’t have any reason to feel jealous, but when you do get possessive, I like it. I want you to fight for me. I want you to care that much. I want you crazy about me. But possessiveness without trust is hell. If you don’t trust me, we’ve got nothing.”

“Trust goes both ways, lauren .”

she sucked in a deep breath. “Damn it. Don’t look at me like that.”

“I’m trying to figure out who you are. Where’s the man who came right out and said she wanted to fuck me? The man who didn’t hesitate to tell me I tie her up in knots, even as I was breaking up with her? I believed you’d always be brutally honest like that. I counted on it. Now—” I shook my head, my throat too tight to say anything else.

Grimness thinned his lips, but they stayed stubbornly closed.

Catching his wrists, I pulled his hands away. I was cracking open inside, breaking. “I won’t run this time, but you can push me away. You might want to think about that.”

I left. lauren didn’t stop me.

* * *

I spent the rest of the afternoon focused on work. Mark loved to brainstorm out loud, which was an awesome learning exercise for me, and his confident and amiable way of dealing with his accounts was inspiring. I watched him breeze through two client meetings in which he conveyed an air of command that was both reassuring and nonthreatening.

Then we tackled a baby-toy company’s needs analysis, zeroing in on poor return expenditures as well as untapped avenues, such as mom-blog advertising. I was grateful that my job was a distraction from my personal life, and I was looking forward to going to my Krav Maga class later, so I could burn off some of my edgy restlessness.

It was just past four when my desk phone rang. I answered briskly and felt my heart leap at the sound of lauren ’s voice.

“We should leave at five,” she said, “to get to Dr. Petersen’s on time.”

“Oh.” I’d forgotten that our couples therapy sessions were on Thursdays at six P.M.It would be our first.

Abruptly, I wondered if it would also be our last.

“I’ll come get you,” she went on gruffly, “when it’s time.”

I sighed, feeling far from up to it. I was already raw and irritable from our fight earlier. “I’m sorry I hit you. I shouldn’t have done that. I hate that I did.”

“Angel.” lauren exhaled harshly. “You didn’t ask the one question that matters.”

My eyes closed. It was irritating how she read my mind. “Either way, it doesn’t change the fact that you’re keeping secrets.”

“Secrets are something we can work through; cheating isn’t.”

I rubbed at the ache behind my forehead. “You’re right about that.”

“There’s only you, camila.” His voice was clipped and hard.

A tremor moved through me at the fury underlying his words. she was still angry that I’d doubted her. Oh well. I was still angry, too. “I’ll be ready at five.”

she was prompt, as usual. While I put my computer to sleep and grabbed my belongings, he spoke with Mark about the ongoing work on the Kingsman Vodka account. I watched lauren furtively. she cut an imposing figure with his tall, leanly muscular frame in his dark suit and carried herself in a way that projected impenetrability, yet I’d seen her terribly vulnerable.

I was in love with that tender, deeply emotional man. And I resented the façade and his attempts to hide herself from me.

Turning his head, she caught me staring. I saw a glimpse of my beloved lauren in his wild blue gaze, which briefly exposed a helpless yearning. Then she was gone, replaced by the cool mask. “Ready?”

It was so obvious that she was holding something back, and it killed me to have that gulf between us. To know there were things she wouldn’t trust me with.

As we exited through reception, Megumi rested her chin on her fist and gave a dramatic sigh.

“She’s crushing on you, jauregui,” I murmured, as we made our way out and she hit the call button for the elevator.

“Whatever.” she snorted. “What does she know about me?”

“I’ve been asking myself that same question all day,” I said quietly.

That time, I was certain she winced.

* * *

Dr. Lyle Petersen was tall, with neatly groomed gray hair and sharp yet kind denim blue eyes. His office was tastefully decorated in neutral shades and his furniture was extremely comfortable, something I noted on every one of my visits to him. It was a little weird for me to see him as my therapist now. In the past, he’d met with me only as my mother’s daughter. He’d been my mom’s shrink for the last couple of years.

I watched as he settled into the gray wingback chair across from the sofa lauren and I sat on. His keen gaze shifted between us, clearly noting how we’d each taken seats on opposite ends of the sofa, our stiff postures revealing our defensiveness. We’d made the drive over in the same way.

Flipping open the cover of his tablet, Dr. Petersen gripped his stylus and said, “Shall we start with the cause of the tension between you?”

I waited a beat, to give lauren a chance to speak first. I wasn’t terribly surprised when she just sat there, silent. “Well . . . in the last twenty-four hours I’ve met the fiancée I didn’t know lauren had—”

“Ex-fiancée,” lauren growled.

“—I found out the reason she’s dated brunettes exclusively is because of her—”

“It wasn’t dating.”

“—and I caught her leaving his office after lunch looking like this—” I dug out my phone.

“She was leaving the building,” lauren bit out, “not my office.”

I pulled up the picture and passed my phone over to Dr. Petersen. “And getting into your car, lauren !”

“Angus just told you before we got here that he saw her standing there, recognized her, and was being polite.”

“Like he’d say anything different!” I shot back. “He’s been your driver since you were a kid. Of course he’d cover your ass.”

“Oh, it’s a conspiracy now?”

“What was he doing there, then?” I challenged.

“Driving me to lunch.”

“Where? I’ll just verify you were there and she wasn’t, and we’ll get that part out of the way.”

lauren ’s jaw clenched. “I told you. I had an unexpected appointment. I didn’t make it to lunch.”

“Who was the appointment?”

“It wasn’t Corinne.”

“That’s not an answer!” I turned back to Dr. Petersen, who calmly returned my phone to me. “When I went up to his office to ask her what the hell was going on, I discovered her half dressed and freshly showered, with one of his sofas bumped out of place, pillows strewn all over the floor—”

“One goddamned pillow!”

“—and red lipstick on his shirt.”

“There are two dozen businesses in the Crossfire,” lauren said coldly. “She could have been visiting any one of them.”

“Right,” I drawled, my voice dripping sarcasm. “Of course.”

“Wouldn’t I have taken her to the hotel?”

I sucked in a sharp breath, reeling. “You still have that room?”

His mask slipped, revealing a flare of panic. The realization that she still had his sex pad—a hotel room he used exclusively for fucking and somewhere I’d never go again—hit me like a physical blow, sending a sharp pain through my chest. A low sound left me, a pained whimper that had me squeezing my eyes shut.

“Let’s slow down,” Dr. Petersen interrupted, scribbling rapidly. “I want to backtrack a bit. lauren , why didn’t you tell camila about Corinne?”

“I had every intention of doing so,” lauren said tightly.

“she doesn’t tell me anything,” I whispered, digging for a tissue in my purse so I wouldn’t have mascara running down my face. Why would he keep that room? The only explanation was that she intended to use it with someone other than me.

“What do you talk about?” Dr. Petersen asked, directing the question at both of us.

“I’m usually apologizing,” lauren muttered.

Dr. Petersen looked up. “For what?”

“Everything.” she raked a hand through his hair.

“Do you feel that camila’s too demanding or expects too much from you?”

I felt lauren ’s gaze on my profile. “No. She doesn’t ask for anything.”

“Except the truth,” I corrected, turning toward her.

His eyes blazed, searing me with heat. “I’ve never lied to you.”

“Do you want her to ask you for things, lauren ?” Dr. Petersen queried.

lauren frowned.

“Think about that. We’ll come back to it.” Dr. Petersen turned his attention to me. “I’m intrigued by the photo you took, camila. You were confronted with a situation that many women would find deeply upsetting—”

“There was no situation,” lauren reiterated coldly.

“Her perception of a situation,” Dr. Petersen qualified.

“A patently ridiculous perception, considering the physical aspect of our relationship.”

“All right. Let’s talk about that. How many times a week do you have sex? On average.”

My face heated. I looked at lauren , who returned my look with a smirk.

“Umm . . .” My lips twisted ruefully. “A lot.”

“Daily?” Dr. Petersen’s brows rose when I uncrossed and recrossed my legs, nodding. “Multiple times daily?”

lauren stepped in, “On average.”

Laying his tablet flat on his lap, Dr. Petersen met lauren ’s gaze. “Is this level of sexual activity customary for you?”

“Nothing about my relationship with camila is customary, Doctor.”

“What was the frequency of your sexual encounters prior to camila?”

lauren ’s jaw tensed, and she glanced at me.

“It’s okay,” I told her, even as I conceded that I wouldn’t want to answer that question in front of her.

she reached his hand out, spanning the distance between us. I placed mine in his and appreciated the reassuring squeeze she gave me. “Twice a week,” he said tightly. “On average.”

Tshe number of women quickly added up in my mind. My free hand fisted in my lap.

Dr. Petersen sat back. “camila has brought up concerns of infidelity and lack of communication in your relationship. How often is sex used to resolve disagreements?”

lauren ’s brow arched. “Before you assume camila’s suffering under the demands of my overactive libido, you should know that she initiates sex at least as often as I do. If one of us were going to have concerns about keeping up, it’d be me just by virtue of possessing male anatomy.”

Dr. Petersen looked at me for confirmation.

“Most interactions between us lead to sex,” I conceded, “including fights.”

“Before or after the conflict is considered resolved by both of you?”

I sighed. “Before.”

He dropped the stylus and started typing. I thought he might end up with a novel’s worth by the time all was said and done.

“Your relationship has been highly sexualized from the beginning?” he asked.

I nodded, even though he wasn’t looking. “We’re very attracted to each other.”

“Obviously.” He glanced up and offered a kind smile. “However, I’d like to discuss the possibility of abstinence while we—”

“There is no possibility,” lauren interjected. “That’s a nonstarter. I suggest we focus on what’s not working without eliminating one of the few things that is.”

“I’m not sure it is working, lauren ,” Dr. Petersen said evenly. “Not the way it should be.”

“Doctor.” lauren set one ankle on the opposite knee and settled back, creating a picture of unyielding decisiveness. “The only way I’m keeping my hands off her is if I’m dead. Find another way to fix us.”

* * *

“I’m new to this therapy thing,” lauren said later, after we’d gotten back into the Bentley and were heading home. “So I’m not sure. Was that the train wreck it felt like it was?”

“It could’ve gone better,” I said wearily, leaning my head back and closing my eyes. I was bone tired. Too tired to even think about catching the eight o’clock Krav Maga class. “I’d kill for a quick shower and my bed.”

“I have some things to take care of before I can call it a day.”

“That’s fine.” I yawned. “Why don’t we take the night off and see each other tomorrow?”

Thick silence greeted my suggestion. After a moment, it became so fraught with tension that I was motivated to lift both my head and my heavy eyelids to look at her.

His gaze was on my face, his lips thinned into a frustrated line. “You’re cutting me off.”

“No, I’m—”

“The hell you’re not! You’ve tried and convicted me, and now you’re shutting me out.”

“I’m exhausted, lauren ! There’s only so much bullshit I can take before I’m buried in it. I need sleep and—”

“I need you,” she snapped. “What is it going to take to make you believe me?”

“I don’t think you cheated. Okay? As suspicious as it all looks, I can’t convince myself you’d do that. It’s the secrets that are getting to be too much. I’m giving all I’ve got to this and you’re—”

“You think I’m not?” she twisted in the seat, sliding one bent leg in between us so that she faced me directly. “I’ve never worked so hard for anything in my life as I have for you.”

“You can’t make the effort for me. You have to do it for you.”

“Don’t give me that crap! I wouldn’t need to work on my relationship skills for anyone else.”

With a low moan, I rested my cheek against the seat and closed my eyes again. “I’m tired of fighting, lauren . I just want some peace and quiet for a night. I’ve been feeling off all day.”

“Are you sick?” she shifted, cupping the back of my neck gently and pressing his lips to my forehead. “You don’t feel hot. Is your stomach upset?”

I breathed her in, absorbing the delicious scent of his skin. The urge to press my face into the crook of his neck was nearly overwhelming.

“No.” And then it hit me. I groaned.

“What is it?” she pulled me into his lap, cradling me close. “What’s wrong? Do you need a doctor?”

“It’s my period,” I whispered, not wanting Angus to overhear. “It should start any day now. I don’t know why I didn’t realize it before. No wonder I’m so tired and cranky; I’m hormonal.”

she stilled. After a heartbeat or two, I tilted my head back to search his face.

With his lips twisted ruefully, she admitted, “That’s a new one for me. Not something that comes up in the course of a casual sex life.”

“Lucky you. You get to experience the inconvenience reserved for men with girlfriends and wives.”

“I am lucky.” lauren brushed loose strands of my hair away from my temples, his own luxuriant hair falling around that chiseled face. “And maybe, if I’m really lucky, you’ll feel better tomorrow and like me again.”

Ah, God. My heart ached in my chest. “I like you now, lauren . I just don’t like you keeping secrets. It’s going to break us up.”

“Don’t let it,” she murmured, tracing my brows with his fingertip. “Trust me.”

“You have to trust me back.”

Folding over me, she pressed his lips softly to mine. “Don’t you know, angel?” she breathed. “There’s no one I trust more.”

Sliding my arms beneath his jacket, I hugged her, soaking up the warmth of his lean, hard body. I couldn’t help but worry that we were beginning to drift from one another.

lauren pressed the advantage, his tongue dipping into my mouth, lightly touching and teasing mine with velvet licks. Deceptively unhurried. I sought a deeper contact, needing more. Always more. Hating that aside from this, she gave me so little of herself.

she groaned into my mouth, an erotic sound of pleasure and need that vibrated through me. Tilting his head, she sealed those beautifully sculpted lips over mine. The kiss deepened, our tongues stroking, our breaths quickening.

The arm she’d banded beneath my back tightened, pulling me closer. Her other hand slid beneath my shirt, cradling my spine in her warm palm. Her fingertips flexed, gentling me even as the kiss grew wild. I arched into the caress, needing the reassurance of her touch against my bare skin.

“lauren . . .” For the first time, our physical closeness wasn’t enough to calm the desperate wanting inside me.

“Shh,” she soothed. “I’m here. Not going anywhere.”

Closing my eyes, I buried my face in her neck, wondering if we’d both be too stubborn and stay, even if it turned out that it would be best to let go.

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holylulusworld · 5 years ago

Text

I don’t like you but stay

Summary: James ‘Bucky’ Barnes is the newest addition to the Avengers. Trying to help his friend settle in Steve asks his friend and the teams moral support to help him with unknown consequences.

Pairing: Bucky x Reader, Steve x Reader (platonic), Sam Wilson, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, Wanda Maximoff

Warnings: angst, language, Bucky being a douche, arguments, fights, violence, angry Bucky, tension, possessive Bucky

Takes place after Endgame. Everyone is happy and alive. No one got hurt...

“You could at least try, Buck.” Steve tries once again.

“They don’t like me and I’m not a team player…not for a long time.”

“But Sam helped us back then, just like Wanda and Clint. We fought together against Thanos, it’s only one dinner. Come with me and eat with the team. Y/N will be there too. You know, my best friend.”

“A doll is your best friend now, huh?”

“She’s not a doll, more like our moral support. Y/N listens to us after a hard mission or if we have problems.”

“A goddamn psychologist or more therapist? No way I let her rummaging in my brain. I’ve got enough of people trying to trick my mind or manipulate me, Stevie.”

“Buck, calm down. She doesn’t want to manipulate you in any way. She’s a friend and I want you to visit her once a week. That’s an order Sergeant.” Steve says full Captain now.

“Fine, Captain. But I will not talk to that woman.”

“Then go to her and just sit in her chair but you will visit her.”

“Fine.”

----

“How is Steve’s friend?” You ask.

“Unfriendly.” Nat chuckles. “Ruined my bikini figure by shooting me.”

“That was years ago, and he wasn’t himself.” Bruce throws in.

“Says the guy with the temper problems.” Sam chuckles.

“Guys, I wanted to know how he is now. Not his time during the Hydra crap. It’s awful this happened to him.”

“Honestly we do not know much about him, except he’s a great fighter and Cap’s friend. I mean he’s not hanging out with us at all. Always stays in his room or trains with Cap.” Sam says, and you nod.

“Thought so. That’s the reason Steve asked me for advice. Jesus this will be a hard piece of work.”

“He’s not a bad man. I could read his emotions and he’s torn and hurt.” Wanda says.

“I guess so. After all, he’s been through. I mean being a puppet to someone must be awful. Waking up and everything you know and love is gone is the worst.” You whisper. Lost in thoughts you barely recognize the man standing behind your back.

“The puppet just arrived.” Bucky spats and you sigh.

“Be nice, Buck,” Steve warns.

“Why? She called me a puppet.”

“I said that being a puppet must’ve been awful. I showed compassion.” You say turning around to face Steve’s friend.

Angry blue eyes stare back at you. You never saw more beautiful eyes at a man. Steve has blue eyes too, but this man is beating him without any effort. The soft brown hair frames his handsome face and you can’t stop looking at his lips.

“Got nothing else to justify your speech?” Bucky mutters.

“Hell, I didn’t hold a speech. I…forget it. I’m sorry if you got it wrong. I was just asking how you are doing. Hi, I’m Y/N, a friend of Steve.”

“A therapist without any compassion.” The blue-eyed man snaps at you and anger is boiling up inside of you. Seeing you rolling your shoulders and your body go stiff Steve plants a hand on your shoulder.

“Just breathe…he didn’t mean it that way. You know you can’t…not yet.” Steve says and you narrow your eyes.

“Fine by me, let’s eat then. Wanda and I cooked for all of you. Including our new member.” You say and Bucky scoffs.

“Won’t eat a bite of anything that doll cooked.”

“Then starve to death, Jamesy.” You chuckle.

----

Around one week later…first appointment…

“Why is there no chair or stuff…only a couch?”

“I like to get comfortable while talking to people. I’m not your therapist. We are not in my office this is my room. I invited you to talk to me, but you don’t have to. There are books and newspapers.” You say to lighten the mood.

“I won’t talk to you doll, no matter which kind of trick you will use.”

“I will not force you to anything, James. If you just want to sit over there it’s fine by me. I’ll answer some emails and stuff then.” You say opening your laptop. Seeing you and Steve as your wallpaper Bucky narrows his eyes.

“Are you fucking Stevie?” He mutters.

“Steve and I are only friends. There’s no physical attraction between us.”

“Lesbian or blind?”

“Huh?”

“Have you seen Steve? He’s Captain America.”

“I know that Steve is very attractive and most of the woman want a physical relationship with him too, but like Wanda and Nat, I’m not into him that way. We are friends since he came back. I helped him find a way to live in this for him new world. I would never risk our friendship for sex.”

“So, you would fuck him?”

“I do not like the word fuck…James. I’m not someone who has one-night stands.”

“Prude then?” He asks again.

“Neither prude nor a whore. Are we done talking about me and my sex life? Steve and I are friends. He’s into someone else, by the way, so if you want to talk about something start with your life.” You grunt.

“I like sex, I’m not prude.” James chuckles and you roll your eyes.

“Yeah. I get it.”

----

“Anything? Did he open up?” Steve asks.

“If you mean asking me about you and me and if we fuck, then yes, Steve. He opened up.” You mutter.

“Seriously? He asked if we…uh.”

“I told him we do not have sex. Don’t worry. Also, I told him I don’t like the word fuck.”

“Same.” Your friend stammers shaking his head. “Why did he ask you?”

“Saw the wallpaper on my laptop.”

“I see.”

----

Three weeks, James. If you do not want to talk about anything it’s fine by me. I’ll call Steve and tell him you are…whatever.” You groan while Bucky continues throwing knives at your books.

“Can you stop this? These books are rare. First editions. Stop ruining my books.” You yell now and Bucky starts grinning.

“That so? Do not look rare to me. Just old paper, doll.”

“If you throw one more knife at my books I’ll call Steve right now and tell him you can not attend any mission for the next months. How does that sound to you Bucky?” You mutter and he narrows his eyes. Searching your face, he licks his lips and throws a knife into the nearby wall.

“What the fuck!” You yell.

“Ah, you said fuck, doll.” Bucky teases and you want to strangle him.

“You threw a knife into my wall, you idiot! I can’t believe I promised Steve to help you. What a waste of time and energy. Could have good sex right now instead I’m trapped in this nightmare.” You groan falling onto the couch.

“Good sex? You…seriously.”

“As if you would know how to satisfy a woman.”

“I know how to fuck a girl to make her scream, doll!”

“Sure. That’s the reason you are hiding in your room since you came here. Just like in Wakanda you stay to yourself. No visitors or friends come around. You are one poor and lonely boy trying to get Steve’s attention.”

“I don’t need to listen to your stupid babbling,” Bucky yells storming out of the office.

“Finally, a reaction. I can work with that.” You say to yourself.

----

“How long do I have to come here.” He groans after two minutes.

“Until Steve says otherwise, or we killed each other.” You retort too tired to fight today.

Closing your eyes, you try to ignore the man staring at you. You can’t see it, but his blue eyes are searching your face.

“Why are you so silent today?”

“None of your concern.” You sigh.

“Tell me and I’ll tell you something too.”

“I do not trust you.”

“Pinky promise.”

“Fine, I was seeing this guy for some weeks. We had a few dates and I started liking him.”

“Was the sex bad?”

“Dunno. We didn’t have sex so far. I was busy with my job, the Avengers…you. I haven’t seen him for two weeks, so I called him and he acted like he’s busy. What he didn’t know was that I was in front of his house. I wanted to surprise him and then…”

“Then what doll? Don’t hook me on a story and don’t continue it.” Bucky mutters.

“I saw him with the waitress of the restaurant we were eating at during our last date. He almost choked on her tongue. Grabbed her ass and more.”

“So, he had fun. What’s the problem?”

“Only a guy can ask you something like that. I started liking him. If a woman does like you she imagines things…a future with you. We don’t see just a potential sex partner. We see marriage, children, a home…”

“Sex?”

“Yeah, dammit, Barnes, sex too. But first of all, I thought he likes me but obviously, he did not. He was just another asshole trying to get in my pants. Satisfied?”

“Hmm…” Angrily clenching his jaw Bucky decides to pay your friend a visit.

“Will you tell me something now?” You ask.

“I ate pancakes and strawberries for breakfast.” Bucky chuckles and your eyes widen.

“I can’t believe I opened up to you only for you to make fun of me.” You yell. This time you are the one storming out of the room.

----

“This won’t work Steve. I’m trying to make him open up for six months now and honestly, I’m done. He’s making fun of me. Lies…”

“Lies?” Steve asks.

“He made a pinky promise if I tell him something personal he will do so too. I told him, but he didn’t keep his promise. Told me what he ate for breakfast. I’m done, Steve. Let him go on missions or not. I really don’t care. You know him better than I do…I just can’t do this any longer. I’m sorry for letting you down.” You sigh.

Moving his arms around you Steve gently plants a kiss to your hair. What you both can’t see is the angry look on Bucky’s face and the jealousy welling up his stomach.

----

The next sessions Bucky never shows up, so you decide to tell Steve you did your best. After the little breakdown, you promised to give his friend another chance but obviously, he doesn’t want it.

Leaving the room to finally meet up with Nat to go on a shopping trip you bump into Bruce staring at you with wide eyes.

“You okay? Do you need my help, Bruce?”

“I think James needs your help. His hand is bloody, and he doesn’t want to tell me why he’s injured. Looks like he hit someone, but he refuses to talk to me.”

“Okay. Calm down, breathe.”

“I’m not going to ‘hulk around’ right now. I’m just worried about Steve’s friend. I would’ve asked Cap but he’s away.”

“On a mission with Tony and Clint, I know. Let’s go then.”

----

“Will you tell me why your hand is bloody and your knuckles almost broken?” You ask.

“…”

Sighing you shake your head. He even refused to let anyone clean the wounds.

“Listen I know you don’t like me.”

Not answering Bucky stares at the wall beind you.

“Dammit, you are so frustrating. Steve had to soothe me after our last session. Cap had to hug me to calm me down, idiot!” You mutter and Bucky’s face lits up.

“I had to hit someone.” He mumbles finally letting you clean the wound.

“Why? Was someone else in danger?”

“He hurt a woman and I had to defend her.”

“Oh, then it was justified, I guess.” You say gently putting some sanitizer onto his wounds.

“Hmmm…I’m sorry I did not come to our session. I had to take care of that guy first.”

“It’s okay. I can throw knives at my books on my own.” You tease and he smiles at you for a moment.

“I can do this for you. Bet you can’t even hit the right target.”

“Maybe…or maybe I’m a master…”

----

“He did what?” You gasp.

“I’m sorry to tell you but it seems like Bucky beat your friend into a pulp,” Sam says.

“Why should he do such a thing? I never even told him anything about Matthew. God, did his wife see this? Was she there too?”

“No, luckily we came just in time and thanks to Starks technology we could fix what Bucky broke. Why is he going after your friends?”

“I think he hates me and tries to hurt me that way, Sam. This ends now. No matter what Steve told me I will make Bucky pay for this. Friend of Steve or not I will mop the floor with the Winter Soldier right now.” You yell storming toward the training hall.

Bursting through the door you see Bucky’s surprised face a smile on his lips he walks toward you but the moment he approachs you he feels his body gets slammed into the nearby wall.

“You think you can do this and believe I will not hurt you!” You yell.

“I got no clue what you are talking about.”

“No clue? You almost killed my friend!”

“A worthless piece of shit!” Bucky talks back.

Using your powers, you slam him into the ceiling and then down on the floor. Groaning in pain he can see you start feeling dizzy. Steve was right. It’s too soon to use your powers again.

“I swear I will break your neck stupid bitch!” Bucky yells.

“Do it! Steve will be very happy after you killed his best friend, asshole!”

“I’m his best friend!”

“Forget it! You tried to kill him, you psychopath. Crazy piece of a man, not even able to control his emotions. I’m done…I’m just done with trying to help you for Steve’s sake. Fuck you, Bucky Barnes. Go to hell or back to Hydra. I don’t care!” You yell and for the first time, Bucky flinches at your words.

Tears stream down your face and you need to brace yourself against a wall to not break down. Before you can react an impact next to you make you scream.

“You won’t just leave! I’m not done with you! I don’t like you…but stay…” Bucky pants removing his metal hand out of the wall.

“Why? You tried to kill my friend! He never did anything wrong. His pregnant wife was in his house. Would you have attacked her too?” You sniff and his eyes widen.

“Wife? You said he cheated on you with a waitress.” Bucky gasps.

“Waitress? I don’t…wait…did you believe Matthew was the one cheating on me?”

“Yeah…he was not?”

“No, Matthew is my cousin's husband. One of my best friends since college.”

“God…then I was wrong. I wanted to punish him for hurting you…”

“Why would you do that?” You ask feeling even dizzier.

“I…”

“I think I need to sit down…” You whisper.

Scooping you into his arms Bucky picks you up to run with you toward Bruce’s lab. Someone has to help him...

----

“You see she’s like Wanda but at the same time different. Using her powers means using life energy. She drains her own energy out to perform her powers. I told her she’s too weak by now. The fight with Thanos got her good. Y/N was defending Vision with Wanda and almost died.” Steve explains looking at your unconscious form.

“She’s an Avenger too?” Bucky asks.

“Kinda…more into defending an injured team member and stuff. She uses a shield to protect us if needed. Y/N barely attacks. It’s just not her style.”

“But she attacked me…really good. A hell of a woman.” Bucky says.

“Ask her out, Buck. Man up and tell her how you feel. Watching you pining is kinda sad.” Steve says knocking Bucky on his shoulder.

----

“Hey, doll. Don’t move too much. You really shouldn’t have attacked me.” Bucky says gently holding your hand.

“What happened?”

“You were unconscious and I brought you to Bruce.”

“Oh, Steve was right. I wasn’t ready to use my powers yet.”

“I’m sorry for hurting your friend. I was wrong…uh…I just tried to punish that guy.”

“You don’t have to punish anyone for me, James.”

“But I want to…I don’t like you but…stay. Please stay with me. Don’t leave me too.” Bucky says kissing your hand softly.

“Bucky?”

“I want…I need…I like you. Would you go out with me?”

“Seriously?”

“You don’t want to?” He sighs.

“I mean you need six months to ask me out? Do you need that long to get me into your bed too?”

Eyes darkened Bucky grins down at you. Covering your body with his he presses you into the mattress.

“No.” He rasps before kissing you breathless.

“Fuck. I like you too…but you will have to tell Steve you stole his best friends heart.” You tease.

“I’m his best friend and he knows you stole mine.” Bucky retorts.

“That’s not true! I’m his best friend.”

“Woman don’t make me mad! I don’t like you but I will make you stay…and I’m Stevie’s best friend.”

“In your dreams…now kiss me again and we ask Steve.”

“Those are the most useful words ever leaving your lips, doll,” Bucky mutters claiming your lips once again.

----

“Fucking finally,” Nat groans dragging Steve out of your room.

“They were fighting over me.”

“No, they are fighting to turn each other on. You really don’t want to see what happens next.” Nat chuckles when you and Bucky start moaning.

“I guess you are right. I like them both but I will not stay…”

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