#I might remove the ‘Should you be lucky’ part cause I feel iffy about it. Note to self: He just came back to Houston and he’s cautious

[lonelysucker7]

I know chapter 5 was supposed to come around these days but not gonna lie, I just haven’t been feeling well. Writing. Posting. Anything really. Don’t really wanna do anything. My motivation is low. Just had a university orientation and that somewhat sucked the life outta me. I take my breaks to calm down. But even when I’m not here I could FEEL some quiet pressure. So… To ease a couple minds who’ve been wondering… Here’s a tease.

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Still gotta be edited but y’know.

[kyukun]

Half asleep o’clock (OumaSai)

ofc! i liked both so i just added them together, hope you don’t mind :> {ah you had forgotten to mention from which category so i just chose fluff, hope thats ok :”)) anyway, heres your request anon <33

prompt list

prompts: 23: “You’re so cute when you’re half asleep like this.”

36: “Can’t you stay a little longer?”

title: Half asleep o’clock 

summary: Shuichi has always thought of Kokichi as this mysterious and dark person. But, once he started dating him, he's come to the realization that that's not true at all. Shuichi's main concern however is how little he sleeps. After seeing a totally new side to him, he's learned that he might like this side a little bit more than he had anticipated. 

word count: 1193

~~ prompt starts after cut! ~~

After another exhausting day inside the killing game, Shuichi rested his head against his pillow. He backtracked towards today's events and hoped it would remain peaceful. Though they had lost some along the way, he hoped today and tomorrow wouldn't break the peaceful streak. A smile came to his face as he thought about the day he had spent with Kokichi. The poor boy hurt his hand (which he patched up with care,) and ended up playing around one hundred rounds of paper, rock, scissors with Shuichi. They got the same result every time and at some point, both decided to play a different game. 

 He remembered how Kokichi was on the brink of tears as he dabbed disinfectant around his cut. It hurt him to see Kokichi hurt himself, but it was cute how flustered he got when Shuichi helped clean it. Shuichi and Kokichi had been dating for a while, well, since the killing game had started. Their situation was complicated but after what had happened with Kaede, their relationship really took off. Shuichi had begun developing trust and interest in Kokichi. Kokichi was the one who had first developed an interest in the detective, but they eventually got closer and feelings blossomed rather quickly. 

 Shuichi would have never guessed he'd end up liking Kokichi, but to be fair, neither did anyone else. Kokichi himself was taken back when he had confessed to him; he never would have thought Shuichi would return his feelings. But alas, they got together in the long run, adding a sort of "partners in crime" aura to their whole dynamic. Everyone was supportive of it for the most part, though, Kaito and Maki remained skeptical and iffy about the whole situation, not sure if they fully trusted Kokichi and his intentions. With tons of reassurance from Shuichi, and affirmation from Kokichi himself, they've gotten used to it little by little. 

 Shuichi was lucky enough to find someone as kind as Kokichi in such a hell like this.

 His cheeks flushed as he closed his eyes shut as his eyes grew heavier. But just as he was about to drift into a peaceful sleep, he heard a loud fall come from upstairs. Immediately, he shoots out the door. He swings his door open and looks up at the cause of the sound. It was Kokichi. He was sprawled out on the floor, giggling. Shuichi frowned and quietly rushed upstairs to his fallen boyfriend. "Kokichi, what are doing on the floor—"

 "Shush!" He hushed Shuichi with a finger to his lips, his grin still plastered on his face. Shuichi could see the slight bags underneath his eyes. He really needed sleep. Shuichi hoped he was taking care of himself better than this. "You're going to wake everyone up, Shumai!" He whined, the sleepiness in his voice peaking through as he yawned. He was the only one being loud here, really. Shuichi helped the collapsed male up before he could cause a disruption to the others around him. "Come on, let's get you back inside."

 He carried the light body in his arms, Kokichi fumbling over his feet a bit as he walked. Shuichi quickly glanced down at Kokichi, who was now staring lovingly at him. "My Shuichi is so strong." His cheeks had started to burn from his oncoming blush. He wasn't strong, Kokichi was just really light. But, he couldn't let a compliment like that go to waste so he didn't bother retorting back and took the ego boost. The two glided across the room and onto the bed. Gently, he placed him on his bed, being sure to tuck him in neatly. Ouma frowned as he noticed Shuichi began to leave after he gave him a quick peck on the lips. "Night, Kokichi."

 "Wha- Shumai~!" His voice raised a tad higher as he whined at the leaving detective. He turned towards the boy, his cheeks still heated. "Yeah?"

 "Can't you stay a little longer? At least until I fall back asleep."

 Cue Shuichi's one big weakness: puppy dog eyes.

 Kokichi continued pleading with his eyes as he laid comfortably in his bed. He let out a sigh of defeat. Knowing he had won, Kokichi jumped for joy, completely undoing all of tucking his boyfriend had just done for him. "Yay! You're staying! You're staying!" As he continued to jump, his foot lost a bit of balance, causing him to fall down onto his bed. Shuichi, being the concerned and worry wart person he was, jumped into action the minute his foot slipped. "Kokichi!" His eyes scanned around the petite male, checking for any injuries or broken bones. He was quiet, which was concerning, especially in his current state. But before he could examine further, he was cut off by intense giggles. 

 He couldn't help but smile as Kokichi rolled around his bed, tears in his eyes as he continued to giggle loudly. His sleep high was so strong, but it was also very much adorable. He reminded Shuichi of a little kid. Kokichi pulled him down with him, flipping them over to their sides. Kokichi buried his face inside his chest as his laughter had died down. Naturally, the latter wrapped his hands around his waist, pulling him closer towards him. What was he going to do with him?

 His hair tickled his nose, he tried to hold down his laugh but ultimately failed. Ouma felt his small laugh and glanced up at him with a smile. He gently kissed Shuichi's lips. Shuichi removed one of his hands from his waist and moved it to cuff his cheek. He kissed back, deepening the kiss to make it more long-lasting. They pulled away, their eyes never breaking apart. "You're so cute when you're half asleep like this. But, this is concerning. You need sleep." He stated in a soft tone, both a mix of worry and assertiveness. Kokichi huffed, "Sweet talk won't get you anywhere, mister detective. You know I have a super rare condition that causes me to giggle myself to sleep."

 "No, you don't. You can't lie to me, I am a detective after all."

 "Ah, you're right. Guess you'll just have to investigate further then detective. I should be sending you to jail, really. You stole something from me."

 Shuichi playfully rolled his eyes, looking down at the smirking liar beneath him. "Oh really? And what would that be?"

 Kokichi pulls him by his collar of his pajamas, stealing a quick smooch from his unsuspecting boyfriend. "My heart." Well, if that wasn't the corniest thing he's ever said. Shuichi decided it. Sleep Kokichi is the best thing he's ever accidentally came across. He honestly wouldn't mind seeing him like this a few more times. "Guilty as charged." After a bit more of gross flirting, they eventually fell asleep in each other's arms. Even if it was at the dispense of his health, he'd wished to see more sides of Kokichi like this. Though, as much as he wanted to, he knows he would never let that happen in fear of him actually hurting himself.

 Ah, Kokichi Ouma. He truly was a man of mystery.

[akatokuro]

The Inevitable StS Rewatch, Episode 30

Here lies Seiya’s brain, may it rest in yandere pieces.

- Hooray, the episode that kickstarted the process of Seiya's brain snapping firmly in half!

- Seriously, I might ramble about Gold Saints and such a lot (EXCUSE ME, DO YOU HAVE A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT OUR LORD AND TRAINWRECK AQUARIUS CAMUS?), but nothing gets me screaming like an idiot like some quality SeiSao content. I LOOOOVE THEEEEEEMMMMMM

- The emphasis on Seiya's arm breaking, and him desperately reaching for Saori with the other, is very visually effective. The visual framing of internal "shattering" feels very appropriate for what this episode ends up doing...

- Seiya's rationalizations when he first jumps after Saori are really, really interesting and honestly sets the framework for the Seiya we see in the rest of the franchise in regards to her. He keeps repeating to himself, "Protecting Athena is a Saint's duty!" This is sort of weird and forced for him in a number of ways - Seiya has never shown any particular investment in either "Athena" or the idea of a "Saint's duty" up until this point, but then suddenly he's sort of frantically, desperately repeating it to himself here.

- It's reading into it heavily, but it makes sense Seiya is sort of trying to justify himself here, because Seiya in particular is in a weird, iffy spot as far as how he defines himself and his motivations for doing this. He originally came back with the intentions of dumping all of this shit from the onset and just wanted to find his sister. Then he got swept up in the drama with Ikki and the Gold Cloth. And now... well, Marin told him to protect Athena, who it turns out is Saori, but what does that actually mean to him...?

- Well, Athena is the goddess of war, who watches over humanity. But when he finally catches Saori and pulls her against him, she's obviously very vulnerable - very achingly human. To the point that when Saori starts to wake up, she cracks a joke about it - "I'm very heavy, aren't I, Seiya?"

- In the face of this kind of Saori, forcing the "protecting Athena is a Saint's duty!" tagline falls apart even further than its already shaky premise, for Seiya.

- And it's this contradiction that really gets to Seiya, and I think this is what started the process of it causing his brain to melt - he just cannot think of Saori as a "goddess" and all that entails when she's in front of him like this. You can see how he quickly switches back to the old "ojou-san" he always used when as far as he knew, she was just another human - and also "she is a very important person to me." "She is a very important person to me" is, in terms of emotional motivations, basically the polar opposite of the previous "it is a Saint's duty to protect Athena."

- Normally, narratives around guys seeing "the fragile woman deep inside" a female authority figure like Saori piss me the fuck off like almost nothing else - it's like an instant red flashing NOPE button - but SeiSao doesn't really hit that for me. For one, because Seiya doesn't actually frame it as a fragility or a unique femininity, per se, on the part of Saori that being a goddess makes her "hide" - and secondly, because he NEVER uses this as a point of authority over her or to condescend her. At all. It really feels like he has a legitimate compassion for her, and it makes him want to support her in her path. He would never challenge or lecture Saori that she should dump the responsibility of being Athena and find happiness as "a normal girl." (Here's looking at you, Fate/Stay Night!) But he wants to do what he can to ease that burden, and dedicate himself to her utterly. He admires her, because she is both human and goddess, and how Saori obviously often struggles between that boundary, but endures. Seiya, basically, understands that Saori is actually the hero of this story, not him, and acts accordingly. It owns.

- This desire to support the strong, incredible human woman in front of him, who is shouldering the mantle of a goddess, clicks with something inside of him - namely, it gives him a deeper sense of purpose that is able to justify all the horrific hell he has gone through during his Saint training. He is obviously bitter about what has been done to him in the early stages of the series and is happy for the chance to dump it all when he first returns from Greece. But devotion to Saori personally, as "Saori-san", not Athena, becomes all-consuming, all-defining for him - in a way it does not for the others - to the point that Seiya has extreme existential meltdowns at the suggestion that Saori might not need him anymore during the Hades OAVs and the movies. If Saori doesn't need him, everything he's done and endured has been worthless. He starts conflating everything that justifies his life and all of his suffering with her.

- To the point that, in Tenkai-hen, nothing else matters. He doesn’t matter. The world doesn’t matter. If Saori-san wants to kill him, it doesn’t matter. If Saori-san wants to destroy the world, it doesn’t matter. The only thing that matters is her. He’ll die smiling, no matter what the context, if he’s dying by her will. 

- That’s the fascinating thing about Seiya's deep, mad love for Saori in a nutshell: it is genuine love and genuine admiration, but it's also something of a fucked up coping mechanism. It's both! Saori knows on some level that it's both! And it kills her! Because she loves him too! But she knows she basically made him crazy and she wishes he could be happy and de-crazied but he rejects all of her attempts to fix it because he's crazy in love with her and wants to stay at her side! Which makes her both so happy and so sad at the same time because she both wants him at her side but also wants him to be free of her! Then there is some lewd hand-holding if they are lucky! etc etc. Goddammit they're so good.

- So yes, Seiya chanting to himself "Saints gotta protect Athena" comes across as frantic and desperate. But when he's holding Saori in his arms and looking at her face and listening to her voice, a strange serenity settles over him in its place. Seiya isn't the kind of person who can throw his entire being into the cause of "Athena." But it turns out that this person, this Kido Saori he's getting to know, and seeing more and more sides of - that's a different story.

- ISN'T IT SAD, SHAINA?

- Actually I really hate Shaina's crush on Seiya as a part of her character but we'll get to that later I guess... grumble grumble grumble...

- hnnnng the way the world obviously just melts away for both of them when they're staring at each other... the fragility of those moments makes them really effective. It really does feel like they're quickly stolen from all the hectic violence of their duties otherwise. There's no way the world and their circumstances would allow them to hold those moments for more than a minute at a time, if that.

- And any chance Seiya's brain had of surviving this whole deal is gooooone. This really encapsulates that paradox between human/goddess for the Saori in Seiya's heart - obviously, a normal human girl wouldn't be in the position to calmly, smilingly agree to die with him. But that's not something a goddess who rules over humans would do, either. The only explanation is that it's just... "Saori-san." Saori-san, who is willing to die with him.

- And the sheer power of someone who nods and smiles and believes in you when you ask something like that of them, well. RIP Seiya!

- Speaking of poor Shaina, the way Seiya actually stops her in her tracks with that utterly dismissive "fuck off, Shaina, busy staring at Saori-san" and promptly goes back to doing just that is... amazing.

- I love the way Seiya keeps enforcing their mutuality as they take their cliff-diving bet, too - verbally, softly telling Saori to hold onto him, looking at her the entire time...

- A consistent thing about Saori, even in the filler, is her taking it really hard when someone is sacrificed or hurt "for her" - like, before, things were a step removed because they were fighting "to protect the Gold Cloth" with the understanding amongst the whole group that it would be disastrous if EVIL FORCES got their hands on it. But here, Seiya almost died directly protecting her, and it obviously affects her deeply. (We even get a cheesy insert song about it!) She’s starting to get a sense of what Sainthood and using Saints actually means. As Athena, it's something she'll unfortunately have to get used to - and she knows this.

- THAT ATTEMPTED KISS IS TRAGICALLY THE CLOSEST THEY WILL EVER GET TO KISSING IN AT LEAST THREE OR FOUR DECADES, IF THAT. ALAS.

- SAORI! IS! THE FUCKING! BEST!

- I LOVE that her quiet devastation over others being hurt for her sake doesn't make her really weepy or waver - it hardens her. It steels her quiet, unshakable resolve to do what she has to do.

- Other shounen or shounen-likes often try to pull that "non-fighter heroine acts 'cool' and says they'll protect the hero instead, even though he usually protects her! See what we did there!?" (kingdom heeeearttttsssss) but the difference is that, uh, Saori is actually cool - and there's a decent emphasis on her perspective and feelings about it, and she actually gets to solve problems and meaningfully intimidate an opponent.

- Saori just calmly, silently staring down Shaina as she threatens her... ahhhh she's so cool I can't deal with it...

- YEAH. SORRY GUYS, THIS IS NOW A KIDO SAORI BLOG.

- and then saori drove a dude to suicide with her powers using his own crows. gj goddess of war

- The sudden snap from the dignified, intimidating "Goddess" Saori to the more human, frantic Saori when Hyouga and Shun show up is interesting - it almost does feel like she's snapping out of a trance or pseudo-fugue state. But it doesn't remotely feel like a split personality deal or anything either, because even in "goddess" mode Saori was focused on protecting Seiya, a human who is absolutely precious and special to her. The motivations and feelings are the same.

- Uh, speaking of Hyouga and Shun, though... where the fuck have you guys been all night until now? You and Seiya were right behind each other when you set out after Saori... did you take the chance to have a secret, prolonged cuddling session together or something under the mountains? I mean, more power to you guys...?

- hey, more silver fodder! what a way to close the episode.