#I might delete this tomorrow

[st-highwind]

Ramble, Bahamut Knight edition!

In my own little ffiv offshoot/au/whatever you wanna call it, I have different ideas for Kain. Ofc.

I politely and respectfully (against my will) dislike the Holy Dragoon getup. This idea initially stemmed from my dislike of the armor alone. However, the more I thought about it and as I actually played (and again, respectfully disliked) The After Years, the more the idea/concept developed.

Kain becoming a Holy Dragoon, to me, takes away from his whole spiel of “I didn’t kill off the dark parts of me, I just accepted them as part of me”. The gist of becoming a “Holy” anything is that the dark is completely purged, removed, eradicated— Kain explicitly does not “kill” his Dark Side, rather he absorbs it. The dark is there, but honed and harmonized. Of course, I don’t want this alteration or Bahamut’s involvement to detract from Kluya’s spirit recognizing Kain’s strength. I feel that that detail fiercely emphasized the bond Cecil and Kain share, for Cecil’s dead father to share power he’d once granted to his son to what I can only assume is another son figure for him. I do feel Kluya’s spirit’s involvement is a testimony to their brotherhood and devotion to one another.

I want to connect Kain to Bahamut, first and foremost. As the dragon god of the eidolons, Bahamut’s gotta know something or another about dragoons or, if we’re feeling pretentious, Mr. Highwind himself. Kain fights Lunar Bahamut during his Lunar Trial, and I want to build on that. A lot. Bahamut likely would’ve also known about the slaughter of dragoons and wyverns in the ffii storyline.

In my mind’s eye, I picture Kain defeating Dark Kain during his trial, Lunar Bahamut appearing and, upon its defeat, its scales flake off and the real Bahamut emerges like something of an odd cocoon. Hatching out of an egg, maybe. For symbolism.

(Alternatively, it would be neat for Bahamut to hatch out of an egg and parallel the last wyvern in ffii that baby Kain bonded with…but I digress)

Anyways, the real Bahamut appears in Kain’s trial. Ideally, Kain will have done a bit better in accepting the darker facets of his persona within my au given Thrush’s presence and therefore doesn’t feel the need to fuck off to Mt. Ordeals for ten years. Instead, Bahamut would appear at the end of Kain’s trial and, with Kluya’s lunarian spirit shrouding the room in some sort of magical aura, Bahamut commends Kain for his strength, resilience, and willpower. He offers to boost his strength and bestow upon him the capacity for black magic.

Kain, knowing the regality of the lunar dragon, kneels and accepts. Bahamut then inhales and unleashes a plume of flame onto the dragoon, enveloping him in a biblical cleansing flame. Once Bahamut’s breath flickers out, Kain stands in a brand new suit of armor with a new weapon fitting nicely in his hand.

“Now,” Bahamut begins, his draconic voice emanating from every corner of the room. “I declare you the Lance of Bahamut.”

Kain, as a Bahamut Knight, now possesses the ability to use black magic. He may not bolster tier 3 attack spells, and as a matter of fact, he might utilize black magic in the same way that Cecil uses white. They may lack the most useful spells that Rosa and Rydia harbor, but they make great backups and can still wail out physical damage. Kain, now with Abel’s Trident, finds that his Jump ability has been replaced with Dive Bomb, a skill that when used, adds a selected elemental charge to Kain’s jump while also increasing the damage output. He withstands magic attacks a bit better and is still a deadly quick fighter.

The development of Kain into a Bahamut Knight rather than the Holy Dragoon makes more sense in my mind as it truly does encapsulate the acceptance and control of his inner darks. It is the honing of the very facets of his persona and channeled into carving a path to his future and fully restoring his honor and dignity.

Idk. Thoughts?

[abelllia]

still thinking about that time i saw a post imply jon wouldn't take another character's childhood trauma seriously.

that's the closest I've ever come to wanting to eat drywall because of a character interpretation.

[redsafalloutfan]

Fellas gender is being an exclamation!point lately

I want Kallamar in the gayest way possible, but I also want Heket in the most lesbian way possible

[youstupidplonk]

Some comforting favourite lyrics in my on repeat playlist 2/12/23

[ryderdire]

Went back and read through some old poems I had to write for shcool as I’m the Thylacine nerd I feel like this one was very in character

Benjamin the last Thylacine.

I wonder sometimes

If you understood you where the last

As you paced around in the the loneliest cage

Stripes to the camera,

did you know this was goodbye

[milo-is-rambling]

Do you ever see two seconds of armpit and have to catch your breath bc your heart skips a beat I mean what who said that I mean I have to eat him I mean

[valictini]

Loop experiences Insomnia

Yeah, Loop’s first night doesn’t go as planned. They lose consciousness for like, max 30 minutes overall. So they’re not doing great in the morning! And whoops, their filter is slipping a bit!

This very tired Loop is NOT CONVINCED that it’s just insomnia and panic attacks and is scared it might actually stick at some point! (It IS just insomnia and panic attacks)

Nille sees that and uses her tried and true strategy with the erratic stranger: treat that fella like a sad toddler! Reassure them! Give them a simple and repetitive task to complete when they insist on helping you that day! Get them to pass out in minutes!

Also you might wonder why Nille even bothers with Loop. Like. Why would she even get them in her house during these first days? She doesn’t know them, and people in the village might be better suited for the job!

Well you see, Nille is in dire need of a distraction! If she’s left alone with her thoughts, she starts thinking about Bonnie and how she doesn’t know where they are and how her best bet is to stay there in hopes they come back. And if she has to think about that for more than three seconds, she immediately combusts! So all in all, a high maintenance washed up stranger that panics at everything is the perfect excuse for her to Not Think About It.

[allpiesforourown]

corny supervillain shen yuan au save me... supervillain shen yuan secretly being hero binghe's biggest supporter... save me supervillain shen yuan au..

all i'm saying is . luo binghe as a teenager that just got his powers, but he's really nervous.. cue Shen Qingqiu, his "arch nemesis" who "smack talks him" by giving him advice

for example:

Shen Qingqiu with a megaphone: haha, luo binghe, evil triumphs once again! if only you were a more experienced hero, you would know you can escape this cage with your sword! xin mo can actually teleport its owner! but you're too ignorant to know the swords true power!!

binghe, opening a portal: omg it's true!! I never knew that..

Shen Qingqiu, acting it up: oh noooo you figured it out!! now i better flee before it's too late...!!

luo binghe quickly realizes the villain is actually not a bad guy at all, and is probably being coerced into acting like one for some reason, so he puts on this whole show while secretly helping people. Binghe starts fighting actual villains and he can tell Shen Qingqiu always kept Luo Binghe out of real danger while preparing him for it and giving him more knowledge. He's never had someone look after him before so he adores Shen Qingqiu a lot

So when the Huan Hua trial actually happens and Shen Qingqiu starts getting accused of murder ?? fraud?? actual crimes?? Binghe knows there's no way that's true. Everyone is super confused why the hero whos job it is to BEAT the villain is acting all defensive and possessive of his enemy

[monalisahyperdrive]

Primarch names from least moanable to the most moanable - entirely subjective.

Factors taken into account:

Name length

How easy it is to say

General vibes ('imagine having sex with a guy and having to moan gilbert')

I wrote this instead of sleeping. I don't know either. This is getting posted and I will probably never address it again if I don't delete it during my break tomorrow. I should not be given internet access past 11pm.

Perturabo

It pained me to put him all the way down (up?) here at the least moanable as I fear he may actually be one of my favourites, however... I am not delusional enough to ignore that not only is this a pretty long name, a good amount of people struggle not only to say it but to even spell it. Not at all dyslexia friendly. I would give it a good go but I feel like in order to enjoy yourself you kind of have to accept you will be calling him 'Perty' or 'Bo' or whatever you prefer.

Sanguinius

Sanguinius fans please spare me but this is a long ass name at 3? 4? syllables. I don't even know what you could call him for short instead. However, I don't doubt that it's entirely possible, I just think it would take a while to stop stuttering through.

Mortarion

Another long name. Are you sensing a pattern yet? I am. More moanable due to having less vowels than Sanguinius and less harsher (?) consonants like in Perturabo. Pretty middle of the road, easy to pronounce, could probably be easier if you just start calling him 'Morty' instead.

Alpharius / Omegon

Alpharius is again another longer name that I feel like I would trip over for a good couple weeks. I am NOT shorting it to Alpha. I must maintain my dignity, whatever crumbs of it remain. Omegon is an easier name - likely due to it having less syllables (3 rather than 4). However, I feel like the only way to shorten it would be 'Meg' and that would make me laugh and I would get distracted. Remember how I said this is subjective? This is why.

Jaghatai

3 syllables, easy enough to say, not a lot of vowels or harsher consonants to trip over. Incredibly doable, and I'm sure many have tried it. Hell, I'd certainly take a good stab at it.

Angron

Harsh G right in the middle, otherwise no complaints really. 2 syllables. Straight forward. You could certainly give it a good go.

Rogal

2 syllables - easy right? Wrong. Evil G right there in the middle again. Probably would have been higher (lower?) on the list if it was softened with maybe an H right after. Alas, it is not so.

Corvus

2 incredibly easy syllables. The V is a little evil (harsh) but with a relatively short name and a soft starting consonant I'm sure it's manageable. Best bird boy. Not much else to say.

Fulgrim

Although apparently a good chunk of people have given it a go - or at least his wives have - we're back to the G dilemma. Personally I'd suggest calling him 'Fulgie' - like Fergie but worse.

Konrad

Quite possibly the most normal name on the whole list. Konrad. Everyone can say Konrad. An easy two syllables with the harshest letter right at the start. Easy peasy.

Roboute

I actually don't know if this is 2 syllables or 3. I even went and looked on Reddit. Some people are saying Ro-Bou-Te, I've been reading it Ro-Boot. Either way these are easy, with the harshest sound being the T of all things. Either way I don't think moaning for poor long suffering Robert is too tricky.

Vulkan

Deceptively soft V and K. What a pleasant surprise. Anyone could moan this easily, and he'd probably be delighted.

Lion

Objectively this is incredibly easy, which is why it made it so high (low?) on the scale. However, I would argue moaning 'Lion' in full sincerity is somewhat hilarious. That sure is the name of an incredibly powerful (and unfortunately incredibly sexy) man.

Magnus

Easy to moan. Probably wouldn't mind if you gave it a go. Again, one of the easier names. I'm sure he'd be happy to tutor you on the subject.

Lorgar

Flows nicely, 2 short syllables, incredibly straight forward. Started mentally calling him 'Lorgie', never recovered.

Ferrus

Incredibly straight forward name. Ferrus, pronounced the same as Ferrous, like the iron tablets. Something something you should do it, it's medicinal.

Leman

Not at the top due to the time it took to decide whether it was Lee-man or Le-man (like lemon). Personal gripe, but if you've gotten this far down without understanding that I don't know what to tell you. Quick, easy, sure why not.

Horus

As much as I wish to be deeply spiteful and shove him somewhere unremarkable in the middle, I just can't do it. This is an easy name. Don't worry, if you struggle at all I'm sure he'd be willing to let you keep trying until you figure it out. Bastard.

[jessiescock]

hmmmm

[carissime]

Literally no thoughts just Gojo after your wedding carrying you over the threshold of your hotel room. You’re not leaving for your honeymoon until the morning but he nearly trips on the doorframe in his haste.

“You really don’t need to carry me—”

“But it’s tradition, we need to consummate the marriage!” he insists. Within seconds his lips are against yours and he’s fumbling with the light switch, and you finally swat his hand away and just beg him to take you to the bed.

He works the zipper of your dress down, part of him sad that he’s not going to see you in this gorgeous gown again, but then it reveals your white lace lingerie and the groan he lets out is broken and guttural and desperate.

This is far from the first time he’s seen you like this, but there’s something about this moment here and now that makes it so much more intense, so much more intimate and he just never wants to let you go.

“Satoru,” you whisper, and his breath hitches.

He leans down to capture your lips in a kiss. “Shh, I know. Just lemme take care of you, like I promised.”

And when he sees the gold band on his fourth finger pressing into the skin of your hips as he sheaths himself inside of you, he nearly loses himself, sending up a prayer to whatever gods are listening that he can keep his promise to keep you safe and happy forever.

[arttsuka]

I made something....

The drawings:

[heathcliffgirl1847]

okay REAL funny guys

[youstupidplonk]

Sometimes you get reminded that there is still good in the world

People care if you’ve eaten enough

People say they’re proud of you and cheer when you get things right

You can start to feel less like acquaintances and more like friends

People say they’ll look after you

And you start to think maybe things aren’t so bad after all

[swordsmans]

your fics makes me want to kill myself!!!! 🫶🫶🫶

hi genuinely thank you for reading—i’m very grateful—and i’m sorry to use your message as an example but i’ve been sitting on this for a minute because it’s very succinct so it’s the easiest way to say this—

please stop sending me anon messages or leaving fic comments like this. i know im an “angst with a happy ending” type of writer so at a certain point im basically asking for it, but these type of comments are some of the worst to receive and ive gotten so many (along with “this fic ruined my life!!” and “i hate you!!!<3333 what the fuck” and “im sobbing pay for my emotional damages 😭😭” type asks, dms, and comments) over the last two years across all of my fics with a big burst recently that it’s just. it’s not fun, it’s never been fun but it’s especially not fun anymore. it was a pretty rough year and it does not make me happy to think that art i’ve spent months at a time working on is actively hurting people, even if it’s meant as a compliment. i recognize this is a sensitive response especially after i’ve done my best to laugh and brush these things off “publicly” (idk how else to word that) or just quietly delete these, but i dunno, maybe its after midnight and im jet-lagged or maybe im just not especially thick-skinned anymore.

thank you to everyone who has been very kind and effusive since my return to fanfic—truly, you are the beloved majority and you’ve made the last two years a gift and a miracle—but i’ll be finishing up a couple of projects throughout the spring so i can close the book (heh) on my wips and then focusing on, idk, touching grass for the foreseeable future. maybe it’ll be a few months or years again, maybe i’ll post things on anon for a while or just write for friends, maybe i’ll pivot entirely and write kindle unlimited hockey dark mafia dinosaur erotica novellas. i don’t know. i love writing, and i want to write in a way that builds connections with people by exploring deep emotional catharsis etc etc etc, but it’s very hard to feel like it’s worthwhile when the more stories i post, the more comments like this come around.

[killjo-q]

Was feeling blue today

There was a strong itch to use blue on something and they were the first two characters that came into mind hahaha..