#I mean we know the answer but why are none of you exploring it................. lemme see into boarboy's childhood Blease

[softichill]

My desperate search for an Inosuke character study that's not focused on shipping or surface-level goofiness continues

[nyxetoile]

I don’t mean to be a stalker but after reading your Loki/Syn series, I just couldn’t help but come over to your tumblr and hopefully see your old posts whilst writing the fanfic. Lemme first of all say thank you for writing the series!! There were moments from your writings that reminded me of the Loki that we now see in the Disney plus show. I’m still in the process of reading, but I couldn’t help but find you on tumblr!

After many scrolls through your account, I learned that you’re a mother and I admire that a lot. I grew up thinking that being passionate in a hobby or a fandom stops when you’re married because the people around my life —as well as what the media tries to tell me — say that having a hobby can take up so much of your time. You can say I’m in the process of becoming an adult so here I am, actually freaking out that I’ll eventuallly have to loosen my interest in the things I consider as my escape from reality. This whole time, I even thought a fandom has this unspoken “age limit” because I am noticing that I’m becoming older than the people I know. Having you in this platform makes me realize that there’s literally no point in trying to lose interest in the things I love.

Also, I swear I’m almost done. I just gotta say this but I think it’s really cool how surprisingly mature your child is, given her age. Apart from that, she seems really cool too. I don’t know what food you’re giving her or what knowledge or wisdom you’re bestowing upon her, but I think you’re doing a superb job as the cool parents for her. What is the secret to a good relationship with your child?

Ok, lot to address here.

First off, thank you so much for reading! I'm really glad you're enjoying the Loki/Syn stories, they are some of my favorites. I'm loving the new Loki show, and am very gratified that some of the character decisions I made about him in my fics have been confirmed by the Loki writers. There is a Loki-show based Syn story coming soon.

Second, of course hobbies don't stop when/if you become a wife and mother! There is likely going to be some reorganizing of priorities and time balance, but you absolutely should not give up your passions just because you add more. When my kids were young I wrote lots of fanfic and read a lot. I didn't go to as many movies in the theater as I would have liked. Hell, my MCU fan fics started with Thor 2, when my eldest was 5 and my youngest was an infant. I had other fandoms/wrote fics before that, but the MCU happened after motherhood. The kids are now older so movie going is a lot easier (hubby and I are seeing Black Widow tomorrow).

And finally, I'm not sure how much credit I can take for my awesomely cool daughter. Clover is as she has always been. She was smart and precocious as a toddler and it has only gotten worse from there. My parenting advice boils down to "treat them like people." I don't mean treat children like adults or like your friends, but remember that they are people with interests and feelings separate from yours. Support their interests. Suggest things they might like and don't take it personally if they don't. Answer their questions honestly and age appropriately. Listen when they talk. Respect their opinions and explain why you're doing things. Clover has been active on the internet several years. My husband and I put down rules to protect her privacy and safety and explained why and the consequences of not listening. I have always encouraged her to explore and moderate her own content. (When I switched her Netflix from "kid" to "adult" I told her "If something makes you uncomfortable, turn it off. Sex in movies is not like sex in real life. If you have nightmares that's a you problem." And that seems to have been sufficient.) She has watched horror movies I wouldn't touch. I KNOW she reads stuff on AO3, but she swears none of it's mine. I buy her whatever books she wants (and like, every fucking tarot card deck Barnes and Noble sells) and warn her if I think there will be content she doesn't like. ("Sure you can read Clan of the Cave Bear. The main character gets raped a lot, though." Child slowly puts book back on shelf.) She knows no subject it taboo or too weird for me to discuss. When she said she wanted to try therapy I got her a therapist, no questions asked.

Kids are people. A parent's job is to raise them into a functioning adult. The best way to learn something is practice. So let them practice making decisions and thinking up arguments and asking questions so when they're on their own that's all easy for them. We're also not letting her move out until she can build a piece of IKEA furniture, cook 3 meals on her own, and check her oil.

[bladekindeyewear]

Bloggin’ thru new Homestuck^2 bonus, The Influencers part 2.  Kinda got my gears ground during part 1, but that largely wasn’t this sideplot’s fault, so I should still be able to enjoy it.

Reminder, bonus update blogging is always light on detail because I don’t wanna spoil all the paid content, but I’ll give the gist of my reactions and go into anything plot or character related that helps understand the main story, as well as giving you a real top-down view of “what happens” so you know what it’s about and whether or not to invest in looking yourself.  (And I don’t necessarily have to give you anything that isn’t main-plot-relevant.)

So where are they going to follow the main party?  They shouldn’t need to record the funeral I’d assume, because that already would have been televised (and awful for Jane’s PR)...  *click*

9/28/2020 - The Influencers, Part 2

TEACHER: Time’s a-ticking. TEACHER: The next plot point is yours to change, if you want it. Don’t you feel it calling to you?

Yeah, just hanging a lampshade on this whole parallel sideplot I guess.

> (==>)

Whatever it is, Imode feels it. A tiny string of relevance spooling out from their belly. They want to follow it.

That’s pretty Lighty and/or Seery.  I’ve used that terminology to describe the pull of Light and its “relevance” connotations even since the only fanfic I’ve ever written, back in 2011 during Homestuck’s run, and it’s obvious enough terminology that I think Rose later mentioned it somewhere like in the Epilogues.  Are these three kids perhaps going to get a fourth, and become their own session by the end of this like Harry, Vrissy, Tavros and Yiffy might?

They can’t stop picturing their friend, Harry Anderson, arrested or tortured or worse. They’re not sure what there is to be done to stop this chain of events, but they’re sure as shit gonna find out.

(”They” is almost certainly referring to Imode here, not all three, since Imode uses they/them.)

Alright, self-aggrandizing used for good.  Show off the sort of thing that Vriska could have accomplished if she actually used her talents for her team for once.  (Besides, like, the similar thing she did just recently by making a scene.)

> (==>)

Imode is the first to choose pursuing this path over bootlicking, and the others are sure to follow.

> (==>)

Yup, Avril and Silas follow.  (Had to be reminded of ALL of their names, it’s been months since their single named appearance.)

> (==>)

Crockercopters overhead but none taking note yet, just ominous setdressing

> (==>)

IMODE: lemme take a ⏱️ to 😮‍💨 before we figure out where to go next. AVRIL: wait don't you know? IMODE: Huh? AVRIL: we were following YOU this whole time.

Oh, that answers the first question I asked.  They have NO clue where they’re going.  Let’s see if they luck out and find the clock tower.

IMODE: You 👂 what he said about the next step 📞 to us, same as i did. Don't you feel it pulling at you?

Literal pull? Powers? Future player?  --All baseless speculation of course.

SILAS: Woah are you seein’ this.

Vriska’s probably putting on her very public display now.  (This is a bonus so I’m skipping lots of banter and arguing.)

> (==>)

Oh, they just saw John flying up to the clock tower in his outfit.  And catching sight of him fly is rare celebrity gossip stuff so of course it’d stand out to them, apparently.  (Only one of them is athletic apparently, the other two are groaning at the prospect of more running.)

> (==>)

Avril always enjoys running, but there’s something else thumping along to the rhythm of the thuds of his feet and beat of his heart. He’d thought Imode was nuts for feeling it just a minute prior, but now he’s realized he isn’t deadweight, that he hasn’t fucked up someone’s life irrevocably, and it pushes him faster and faster as he tears ass toward the belltower.

(Did we know Avril was he/him before this?  Probably but if so I forgot.)

Okay, since we’re getting glimpses into each of their headspaces narratively that BOTH have had some oblique aspect references, I have to at least OPERATE on a guessy assumption that there’s a sort of classpect-for-each-of-them thing going here.

I’ve quoted both those whole paragraphs here... so what do I see?  This is going to be a bit tougher because I don’t care as much to remember these characters...

Imode had some Lighty-or-Seery language, and then could not stop picturing bad things happening to Harry, wanting to avert that chain of events.  So something of a Seer or Mage would make sense.  But given how easily Lighty stuff and the Understanding classes (or at least what we think those are) can be conflated, Mage of Light seems a bit of a premature jump.  Heck, I’m only saying Mage because a Seer of Light already occupies a starring role, and because her first act on that feeling was to jump after it herself and tell the others:

IMODE: Stay here and 👢👅 your way into fame if that's what you really want. IMODE: I’m ✈️. Follow me if you’re not 🐔💩.

--leading by example rather than directing the others into battle.  Only half-caring if they followed, willing to pursue it herself if necessary.  So, potentially more “Active”.

As for Avril... the word “heart” is mentioned there, sure, but the full context is “there’s something else thumping along to the rhythm of the thuds of his feet and beat of his heart”.  I’m inclined to think that the rhythm/beat references, especially the even footsteps and heartbeats hitting like a metronome, might be more tied to Time?  But if so, I don’t see anything class-related.  (Could also be Blood, and him thinking of what he owes in the last sentences could be reinforcing that?  Big question marks for now.)

> (==>)

Door to the belltower’s locked.  The kids figure John’s forgotten that his son can’t fly.

AVRIL: this is it, this is the thing we can help with! #feelinit #vibes IMODE: OK I'm excited that you believe me now, but what are you gonna even do? IMODE: use your big all-star 💪 to break down the 🚪?

--so they think they can “resolve a missing plot point” by getting the way into the clock tower open?  Is this going to be a theme or running joke of the Influencers sideplot, showing plotholes resolved in bonus content like how we finally saw how Gamzee’s body was relocated last time?  When I was explicitly mad about that?  (This seems like a much smaller one though.)

Apparently in HS^2 proper they remarked that the door SHOULD be locked, but Vriska just opened it anyway and wasn’t surprised it was unlocked, which she would’ve ascribed to her luck -- how the universe just makes way for her.  (And we’re literally seeing HOW the “universe” “made way” for her this way, through these Influencer kids.  Even though Vriska could have broken down the door in a second and it’s practically meaningless.)

> (==>)

Avril just has the key!

AVRIL: so like my photoshoots are like, #modernfashion #myworkout #urbexp IMODE: Yea, your 📸 are why we’re all in this mess. We know. Get to it. AVRIL: fair. ok well this is the urban exploration part. AVRIL: a lot of the public infrastructure buildings in the kingdom have the same weird, shitty deadbolts on them. AVRIL: its like they were mass-produced for ease of access or something. AVRIL: none of the deep crockergov stuff, but a lot of the kingdom maintenance buildings. AVRIL: so once you swipe one key, you got access to it all. AVRIL: that’s how i get a lot of my hard-to-get shots #tradesecrets #tellnoone

Hhhmmmmm.  So what does this tell us about his potential role?  Getting places you’re not supposed to is associated with the Thief, Rogue, Bard, and sometimes Knight classes... as well as the Time/Space aspects, or the Void and Breath aspects.  A Thief or Rogue of Time could do the trick, and fit with the rhythm paragraph earlier... whereas Space doesn’t have the same rhythm associations even if it is “places” he’s getting into for these shots.  And photography, snapshots still in time, is something Dave was also explicitly into.  Plus, this exploit he’s showcasing is specifically for older buildings, playing into history/archaeology from an urban perspective.

So, Time is looking like a safer and safer bet for him.

> (==>)

lock click

> (==>)

long-hair swoop, cheer

SILAS: Yeah, I’m tickled a near-disproportionate amount by the unlockin’ of a door, so I’m inclined to believe you were onto somethin’.

Still no real hints about Silas, yet.

AVRIL: ok so. we did it, right? #missioncomplete AVRIL: feels a little anticlimactic #tbh IMODE: idk, I think so? whatever I was feeling doesn't seem so immediate anymore. IMODE: I wonder if-

Okay, that’s some near-confirmation that Imode was LITERALLY FEELING the plot or some such.  We’ll probably end the Influencers sidestory eventually with at least solid GUESSES blatantly obvious for their potential Hero Roles or the like.

> (==>)

Ah, Vriska and the kids are coming-- and we get the Silas paragraph(s)!  Silas is green-themed with green text, and a session with a Time player has a good chance of having a Space player too, so let’s see if...

Silas doesn’t know what being spotted by the other kids might mean, metaphysically or logistically or legally. She’s not particularly pressed by that sort of thing. But this is a day that’s come with more introspecting than she’s used to having to endure in a year, so she's ready to get moving before it becomes an issue.

As Harry Anderson, Vrissy, Vriska, and Tavros proceed to have this conversation, Silas pushes to catch up with Avril’s pace. She’s not sure where they’re headed, and has no clue what all this means for her. She knows the step she’s taken isn’t one she’ll be able to backtrack from, but she’ll figure that out tomorrow. For now, one foot in front of the other.

That...

I mean there’s a lot of talk of time-FRAMES, from a lazy perspective, but just-pushing-forward-in-the-here-and-now is reasonably Spacey? ...hm.  I was excited for the Silas paragraph(s) but I don’t see any immediately-apparent pattern meant for us to discern classpect info here.  Maybe a female Page example (since we could use one), propelled along by events without knowing what’s going on at first, too early in her journey to have taken more than her first step up the gradual incline of her long-term potential?

I really don’t know I guess.

Anyway, that’s the end of the bonus upd8!  See ya in a while.

[dazeduchess]

The Waifs & The Strays || A Duff McKagan fanfic Chapter 4

Read chapter 3 here!

Words: 765

Author’s note: fluff, fluff and more fluff I guess?? Lemme know what you think :)

Warnings: none

00:32 AM

It was such a clear night. More stars were visible than on an average L.A. light-polluted night. The moon was almost full and it's light shone on Duff's beautiful face. I admired his lips as he was talking about the dreams he used to have as a kid. We'd already covered all sorts of subjects. We talked about how I grew up with my aunt and how devastated I was when I lost her to cancer last year. Duff told me about his big family and how chaotic that could be. He missed them and was going to visit them soon, he said. I told him my biggest fears, biggest dreams and biggest accomplishments. And in return he told me his biggest goals, biggest worries and biggest needs. I even told him about my mole in the shape of an heart next to my back dimples, which, of course, he insisted on seeing.

I suddenly shivered. It had cooled down a bit since we were out here. "You cold?" Duff asked in a slightly worried tone. I shook my head, but my body betrayed me and shivered again. He smiled at my stubborness and put his arm around me. He pulled me in a warm embrace and I burried my head in his chest. A comfortable silence fell between us. I enjoyed the warmth of his body. It made me feel safe.

A smirk appeared on Duff's face. "What are you thinking about?" he said with a low voice. I sighed, looking up to the nightsky: "I was thinking about how the Universe listens to us sometimes." He gave me a questioning look. I smiled, unsure on how to phrase my elaboration: "I mean, sometimes you just have to ask for something, and the universe just gives it to you." A year ago, after my aunt had passed, I'd felt so lonely. I had asked the universe for a guy that I could love and would love me back and maybe he was here now. "Is that so?", Duff smirked. "Absolutely", I answered with a smile. His eyes started glistening. 

"Dear universe", he started, "I would very much like to kiss this beautiful girl next to me." My chest tightened and I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks. He looked into my eyes. "Can I kiss you, Rianna?" I gave him a small nod, waiting in nervous anticipation. He came closer, our foreheads almost touching. He closed his eyes and his lips slowly grazed mine. Then he pulled back, smiling. "Tease", I muttered while wrapping my hands around his neck and pulling him in. My lips crashed into his. Our lips moved slow in perfect harmony. His soft lips tasted like hard liquor and smoke, with a hint of honey. This kiss was different than any other kiss I've ever experienced. Those had been rough and fueled by lust. This was different. Softer. His hands caressed my back, sliding from my shoulders to my waist. My tongue was waiting for an entrance, but then... he stopped.

I could feel him pull back and I opened my eyes, a small dissapointing noise escaped my mouth. Did I do something wrong? He noticed the confusion in my eyes. "I just... don't wanna move too fast" he explained with a small smile. I nod my head, understandingly. He cups my cheek with his big rough hand. His calloused thumb investigating my longing lips. "You make me feel... different", he continued, "I want to take my time and explore what this could become." I look down, not knowing how to feel or respond. Yes, this does feel different. I felt different ever since I saw him in the crowd. I understood why he wanted to take it slow and I wanted that too, but it took everything in my power not to grab him and explore every inch of his body with my lips, tongue and hands. 

He raises my chin with his thumb, so I am met with his gorgeous eyes. "You are so beautiful", he whispers and slowly gives me a kiss on my forehead. He pulls me in again, his arms around me, my head against his chest. I've never felt this safe. I breath in his smell, a combination of alcohol, cigarettes and his shampoo. He puts a lost string of hair behind my ear and starts playing with the rest of my blonde locks. I close my eyes en enjoy all the things he makes me feel. A feeling of complete serenity flows over me. For a moment, I am happy.

---

Read Chapter 5 here!

[donttellpeterparker]

Your Arch Nemesis Part 1

Summary: Peter Parker, you hated him with a passion. Though over the years that seemed to dwindle into something else..

No..

You couldn't like your arch nemesis, right?

Requested: Yes, thank you! (if anon would like to be tagged please lemme know)

Word Count: 1.9k+

Warning(s)?: Peter!Reader enemies, Fluff, Angst, soFTNESS so ummm that's it??

request (x) masterlist (x)

--------------------------------------------------------

Your Arch Nemesis

The day of a decathlon meet always had you nervous. Yes, you were confident in your capabilities but you knew you would however be beaten, yet again. It happened every year for the past three years, the school that always managed to defeat yours was Midtown high. A Science school of course, everyone who went there was practically a genius. Yours was just any old public school with a variety of pupils.

Growing up you had always loved solving problems, math problems in particular. You were fairly good at science but started getting confused once the black hole theory entered. You were in all AP subjects yet still felt out of place, like you didn't quite belong. There was always many people smarter than you, you knew there would be. The only strength you considered to have was maths.

''How much further? We've been on this bus for hours'' One of your fellow decathlon members whined, you think her name was Wendy but wasn't quite sure. You were quite the loner and tried not to mingle with others when possible. You were the walking definition of 'nerd'.

''It's been 28 minutes, Penny'' Penny, you really had to pay more attention to those around you. However, you heard a loud excessive groan from ahead, assuming it to be Penny and soon the thought of interacting with these people immediately flew from your brain.

''Let's do some brain teasers! Keep our minds warm'' Almost everyone piped up, eager to do something until we reached Washington.

''Okay, What's the atomic number for Fluoride?'' The Captain, Hannah called out with a smile.

''9, are you going to give us real questions?'' Of course Hannah only threw a teaser to make sure we were awake and alert. She just laughed and soon began reading out more, harder and harder with each question. Of course it was weird, you being on a science decathlon team when obviously you wanted to be on the math one. Unfortunately, that one was full and this was a close second.

''Y/N? Are you going to answer?'' The whole bus had turned to face you expectantly. You hated attention. Gulping nervously, you shook your head honestly, not even knowing the questions. God, right now is not a good time to start having a panic attack.

''Keep focused everyone!'' You knew that was directed at yourself but appreciated that she didn't point you out in front of everyone.

''Okay, how about...''

~*~*~*~*

The building was huge and already filled with heaps of other school students. The bus pulled up and your teacher strode to the front, going over the rules and times for the next two days. The motel you'd be staying at was shared with the other schools. After the teacher went over everything she led you all inside, over to one of the tables set up to get name tags, room keys and schedules.

''Please stay with your assigned buddy at all times! I am not losing another kid on a field trip...'' You were pretty sure she meant the last part for herself but still managed to hear.

''Hey Peter! Look at this, isn't it so cool?!'' Your head spun around to the source of the sound. You saw two familiar faces not too far from you, staring at one of the sculptures near the water fountain.

''Yeah Ned, totally cool...'' The other voice belonged to no one other than Peter Parker. Your rival, your arch nemesis, your crush...

It was silly to have a crush on a boy who went to a completely different school, you only got to see him four times a year and yet that was enough.

''Do you think they're here yet?'' Peter whispered to Ned, hoping to not be overheard by others. Ned squinted his eyes and glanced around them.

''You mean if she is here'' Peter scowled at his best friend and adjusted his backpack on his back.

''I really don't get the rivalry between you too, does it really matter who wins?'' Peter looked at Ned with wide eyes, not believing the words leaving his mouth.

''Yes!'' Peter practically screamed incredulously. Ned shook his head and did one final take of the crowd, he spots you and shakes Peter's arm.

''There'' Peter turned around to were Ned was facing and stopped short once he saw you. The last time was only 4 months ago yet you had looked different. Your hair was longer, framing your face nicely in his opinion. Your clothes weren't as baggy anymore, looking like you had grown too.

Peter starred too long. Ned had to fake cough to get his attention.

''Sworn enemy huh?'' Ned just nudged Peter before going to check in. Peter sighed to himself and glanced at you one last time, this time managing to catch your eye. His eyes widen fast as his heart rate picks up a little. He soon faces away and follows Peter, ignoring your gaze still on him.

~*~*~*~*

A few hours had passed, everyone had settled into their room, unpacking a few things before immediately leaving their rooms to explore despite the rules. You had decided to stay in, catch up on some reading to ease your nerves for tomorrow. Your study notes and science books were all on the desk ready to go after you ate some dinner later.

''A bunch of us are heading down to the pool, wanna join?'' Your roommate Sydney had asked, you looked up and shook your head with a soft smile, adjusting your seating position on your bed. She smiled back and closed the door, hearing her and a few others laugh and giggle as they made their way to the pool.

After half an hour you decided to put your book down. Grabbing your hoodie from your bag you slipped it on, popping outside your room with the key and your phone. Some how you had managed to turn around so quickly, knocking into someone who was walking past your room.

''I am so sorry!'' You apologized to the poor person you had just unintentionally made fall back. You didn't even get the chance to notice who it was before reaching out your hand to help them up.

''You have a mean push'' You recognized the sarcastic voice but still didn't twig.

''I didn't push y-'' You finally glanced up and notice Peter Parker standing in front of you, his eyes glancing down. Your cheeks immediately flamed up at the attention he was giving causing you to advert your gaze.

''Hey, Peter'' It was always awkward talking with him outside of an event, when you were in the zone trying to beat him it was easy, he was your rival then. But out here? What was he? You knew what he was supposed to be but yet you didn't hate him, no where near as much as he probably hated you.

''Hey'' Short and sweet, keeping this conversation going would be disastrous for the both of you.

''Hey'' Didn't you already say that? You mentally shook your head and wanted to crawl back into your room, hide from him and everyone till tomorrow.

''You can let go now'' You glanced up at him in confusion, not knowing what he was referring to. All he did was look at you then down, you followed his gaze and noticed your hand was still in his from helping him up. You retracted your hand so quickly, blushing madly in the process. Your heart had already being beating so fast yet this seemed to make it beat triple the speed.

''Oh, sorry'' You were starting to apologize too much to him. After all, he was your arch nemesis. Arch nemesis, if he was that then why were you so comfortable holding his hand? So what if you had a teeny weeny, almost minuscule crush on him, he hated you and you hated him, simple.

Without another word he moved pass you without sparing a glance. You smiled to yourself, stealing feeling the warmth that was left by from his hand. Great, now you needed to study extra hard to even focus during tomorrow's event.

~*~*~*~*

An entire two hours and there was no sign of Peter. He had never missed a decathlon event ever. Your eyes had skimmed over the Midtown high team and there was nothing, no Peter anywhere. It wasn't like you were worried or anything.. just simply curious.

However even without Peter you had still managed to lose. The whole team felt guttered by losing yet again to Midtown but didn't dwell too much on it seeing it was an often occurrence.

The whole team decided to go over the Washington Monument straight afterwards seeing as it came free with the packages we were given.

''Alright everyone! Please stick together, we only have an hour before our bus turns up'' An hour to do the entire building was no where near enough time but you were going to try. Even if you had to leave the group...

''Peter, are you okay?'' You ignored the hush conversation Ned was having over his phone near the security gate. Though on hearing Peter's name... you tried to listen carefully.

''Don't worry, it's safe, it's in my backpack'' You were getting confused but just decided to line up behind Ned to go through the scanner without looking obvious

''Please empty your pockets into here'' The guard said behind her desk, grabbing a tray for you stick your things in.

''You missed the decathlon, I covered for you'' So Peter did miss it but why? You knew it was none of your business but you were curious, definitely not worried.

''We're at the Washington Monument, wait hold on a second my stupid bag... here'' Without thinking, Ned passed his phone over to you as the lady Guard began to reprimand him for taking so long.

Surprised didn't even cover how you were feeling right now. The sound of Peter's voice yelling through the phone however snapped you out of it. You placed the phone to your ear.

''Hello?''

''Y/N? Why do you have Ned's phone?'' Peter asked, sounding a little out of breath. You shrugged your shoulders but soon realized he couldn't see.

''Ned gave it to me, he's going through security'' Peter sighed to himself, worry getting the best of him. He tried to ignore Karen, his A.I which kept bugging him about your name.

''Is this Y/N? You should tell her how you feel'' Karen had said, only to Peter so he was the only one who heard.

''Not right now, god, Y/N please put Ned back on the phone, it's important'' Unfortunately Ned had just walked through security, the lady now turning towards you with the same scowl she had with him.

''Sorry he just went through, I have to put the phone down, sorry'' You ignored Peter's pleas as the phone got disconnected through the x-ray machine. Once you walked through, Ned collected his things and his phone from your tray.

''Peter sounded hurried, is he okay?'' You found yourself asking Ned with slight concern. He looked at you and shook his head with a boyish smile.

''It's Peter, he's just late and doesn't like to be'' Ned smoothly lied, hoping you wouldn't notice. You detected the lie but decided not to think more into it, it had nothing to do with you. With a smile, you went to rejoin your school team and begin the tour, unknown to the events that were about play out...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: Here's part one! Part two soon?? Lemme know if you want Part two! 

[supeson]

Impulse

did u know bruce doesn’t have a canon birthday? they’ve got like 5 different dates  down as what could be CONSIDERED his birthday but i don’t play GAMES like dc does

part one, part two, part three, part four, part five, part six, part seven, part eight, part nine , part ten

“So like, is this the point in the relationship where he kills me, because as a billionaire he can’t feel human emotions anymore, and the only thrill he gets is from killing?” You ask Alfred from the backseat of the Lexus you’re sitting in.

Alfred lets out a laugh, which you count as a win. “I have forgotten how funny you are. It’s been a while since I have laughed this hard.”

Your eyes widen and you look down, surprised that that’s Alfred laughing hard. “Anyway, where are we going? He asked me to take the night off of work? Is everything okay?”

“Everything is fine,” He reassures you. “Master Bruce would just like to have you over for dinner, is all.”

His eyes flick to yours in the rear view mirror, and you fix him with a look. “You know he’s been teaching me how to spot a lie, right? What is it? What’s tonight?”

“I underestimated you, it seems. If you must know, tomorrow is Master Bruce’s birthday. He does not like to divulge this information, instead preferring to keep it to himself, but as he will be indisposed tomorrow, he would like to see you tonight,” Alfred tells you, making the turn onto the Manor’s long driveway. 

“What the fuck! He didn’t tell me! Of course, I know what you just said and all but like still! What the fuck! I didn’t even get him anything! What am I supposed to get the man who could buy his way into heaven? Christ alive, I feel bad now.” You had jolted up at your first exclamation, but now you’ve shrunken back into your seat, looking out the window moodily. 

“If I could just say something?” Alfred asks, eyeing you once again from the mirror. 

“I mean, I guess. I can’t really stop you from talking. Free will and all that.”

“I believe your mere presence will be present enough for him. He doesn’t quite need material things, as you know. Master Bruce has had many partners over the years, but none quite like you. You make him...lighter, I suppose you could say. He’s not as worried, or serious, when talking or thinking about you. It is a nice change.” Alfred stops at the door to the Manor, and gets out. He frowns when you open the door and get out before he can round the car, to get the door for you. 

You walk into the Manor and make a face. The place is empty from the looks of it. “Shouldn’t there be like...kids runnin’ around or whatever?”

“They have all made plans for the night, respecting Master Bruce’s wishes to be alone on his birthday.” Alfred moves past you, towards the kitchen. “The dining room is down the hall and to the left, dinner will be ready shortly.”

You’re a little unnerved by that answer, but leave it be. You walk down the hall, looking at all the portraits and vases. There’s a huge grandfather clock in the dining room, which shows it to be twenty ‘til. Alfred’s already set two places at the table, one at the head, one right beside it. You raise an eyebrow and scrunch your face up. You don’t like that. You move the settings down to the middle of the table, right beside each other. You sit down at one, just in time for Bruce and Alfred to come walking in. 

“Alfred, I don’t have time for dinner, I need to g-” He cuts himself off as he sees you sitting there, a sheepish look on your face. “What are you doing here?”

“Oh! Well, uh, Alfred told me your birthday was tomorrow? So happy early birthday, for one, and he said you wanted to eat dinner together? And you know I never really have anything going on, so...” You trail off and purse your lips. 

He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I see. Well, I’m not going to send you home hungry, I suppose.”

“I could leave, if you really want! I’ve got some like, bagel bites at home, and some Funyuns, if you’ve got like, places to be.” You start to push your chair out from under the table, when Alfred interrupts you.

"I've already made the meal, the two of your might as well enjoy it," He says, fixing Bruce with a look. The man himself lets out a heavy sigh, then finally nods. "Dinner will be served shortly."

Bruce sits beside you, then looks down at the place settings. "This isn't normally how Alfred sets the table."

"I saw. I, uh, moved them, ‘cause I didn’t like it. Besides, is it that bad if I wanna sit beside you?”

He just shrugs as Alfred brings in the first course. Dinner is nice. You crack the usual jokes, Bruce talks about socialite stuff, Wayne business. You have a feeling there’s something he’d rather be doing, but push it to the side. After dinner, he gives you a tour of the Mansion, which ends with his bedroom. 

“I promise you, there’s nothing exciting in there, just my bed, dresser, and bathroom,” He says, opening the door for you to see. “And the walk-in closet, but I think you’ve had enough of walk-ins, huh?”

You whack him on the arm as you walk in  and sit on his bed. He watches you lay back and spread your arms out. “Shut up! Just because I’ve kissed you in your pantry, doesn’t mean I’m gonna be horny for you in every enclosed space we’re in together.” He laughs and joins you on the bed, sitting just an inch or two away. You heave yourself up with a grunt, then look at him. You look him up and down for a second before speaking again. “I’m sorry I don’t like. Have anything to give you for your birthday. But...”

You lean forward and kiss him. He doesn’t jolt, doesn’t seem surprised, just kisses you back. You position yourself above him, and try to deepen the kiss, swiping your tongue across his lips. They’re soft, you note, pleased. You’re not under any illusions as to who’s really in control here, but you appreciate that he’s letting you explore. You’re hesitant to start grinding down on him. “You sure this is okay? These are some really nice sweatpants, I don’t wanna ruin ‘em,” You say against his lips. 

He lets out a quiet laugh. “Trust me, they can be washed. Give me all you got.”

You shrug and continue grinding on him. His hand goes to your hip, guiding you, the other snaking up the back of your shirt, and he smiles, genuinely smiles, at your lack of a bra, and moves his hand to your front, palming a breast. You trail a hand down his chest and push him slightly away. “Here, lemme just...” You whip off your shirt, and he does the same, tossing his long-sleeved shirt off to the side. You resume grinding on him, a little self conscious at being topless, but excited seeing Bruce Wayne shirtless for the first time. It’s different in a private setting, knowing you’re the only one seeing this view. 

You start to trail kisses down his neck, but think better of biting or sucking on him. You’re not seventeen, and he’s a grown man, with board meetings and  parties to attend. His fingers start to skirt around the top of your jeans, and he fixes you with a look. You nod, and his fingers slip in, past your underwear. He groans a little at how wet you seem to be already, enough so that his fingers dip into your pussy, wetting them, then rubs your clit. You keen in his lap, sucking on one of his nipples in retaliation, sucking marks around the both of them and across his chest. Hopefully he won’t be doing any swimsuit catalogs any time soon, you think. 

His thumb takes over rubbing your clit, his fingers curling back up into you. You start panting, then pull his sweatpants down, freeing his dick. While isn’t fully hard yet, your hand wrapping around it is sure to help that. You stroke him quickly, flicking your wrist right up at the head, and he pushes you over the edge just as he finds your g-spot. You cry out quietly, accidentally gripping his dick tightly. He doesn’t seem to mind, though, just hisses at the feeling as you slump against him, still trying to weakly give him a handjob. He gently pries your hand away, and lifts you off of him. God, why’s he gotta be so fuckin’ strong, you think.

He peels your pants down, taking them off completely for you. Thankfully you’’d had a mind to take your shoes off at the door of his bedroom. Bruce goes to get a condom, but you wave him off. “’S fine, I’m on the pill.”

He huffs a laugh. “Alright then.”

He rubs his dick through your wetness a couple times before pushing you, You both groan at the feeling, and you bring one hand down to your clit, rubbing slowly. Bruce wastes no time drilling into you, letting out small grunts every time you tighten around him. You hook a leg around his waist, and he responds accordingly, keeping his thrusts short and deep. “Fuck, Bruce, c’mon.”

“Your wish is my command,” He says with a cocky smile. “Rub your clit faster, I’m getting close too.”

You arch your back and do as he says. After a couple of well-timed thrusts, you cum again, pulling him down with you. He lets out a moan, a real moan, as he cums, filling you up. He’s silent, hanging above you for a beat, before pulling out and laying off to your side. You’re quiet for a couple of beats, feeling his cum start to come out of you, then open your mouth. “I...”

You don’t feel it, but Bruce tenses beside you. He’s afraid of your next words, it’s been so nice dating you, he doesn’t want to have to break up with you over three little words, he ca-

“Have to pee. Get off my arm.” You struggle to get up as his full body weight presses down on you. He laughs, a deep, full-body laugh, then rolls over, obliging. 

Looks like things are still okay for the moment.

[aalissy]

The Press

Chapter 23 is done! I really enjoyed writing this one hee! Lemme know what you guys think <3!

AO3

“Ladybug! Ladybug! Is it true that you and Chat Noir are dating!?”

“Ladybug! Over here! Can you give your opinion on what people are deeming Ladynoir!?”

“How do you feel about Marichat?!”

“Wh-what?!” she sputtered as thousands of questions and microphones were shoved into her face. Cameras flashed at her as she blinked wildly against the bright lights.

“Are you or are you not secretly dating Chat Noir?!”

“Secretly dating?! With Chat Noir?! Are you insane?!” Ladybug choked.

“Then why have you been spotted making out with the superhero several times?!” a loud voice from the back shouted at her, causing a large uproar from the audience in front of her.

“It wasn’t several times!” she tugged at her pigtails in frustration, “It was twice! Once to stop him from attacking me and the second I don’t even remember!”

“So why does he keep calling you those adorable pet names then?” someone chuckled.

“I don’t know! That’s just Chat being Chat!” Ladybug groaned, “Besides, I can’t be dating him when I’m already dating someone else!”

What is wrong with me?! I’m not dating anyone else... Shut up!! Her mouth slammed closed as even more questions began firing off from the crowd.

“Who are you dating?!”

“Is it Queen Bee?!”

“No way! Guys, she’s totally dating Marinette! That’s why they’re never seen together! Right, Ladybug?”

Ok, that was it. Ladybug’s temper flared as she defensively snapped at the crowd, “No! It is not Marinette! Or Queen Bee!! I’m dating Adrien Agreste!” Her mouth clamped shut again as her eyes bulged out of her head.

Time to leave...

Her yo-yo immediately wrapped around a ledge as an onslaught of questions poured out of the press. Wincing, she flew to her room as fast as she could, making it there in record time. With a groan of misery and two hands covering her entire face in shame, Marinette flopped down inelegantly onto her bed.

“Marinette?” Tikki poked her uncertainly, “Are you alright?”

“No,” she moaned into her pillow, “I’m going to die.”

“Come on now,” she patted her shoulder, “It wasn’t that bad.”

“I said I was dating Adrien Agreste. If the shame doesn’t kill me first he definitely will,” Marinette mumbled before flipping over onto her back, “Well, Tikki, it was a good run. I really enjoyed being Ladybug.”

“Marinette! Stop! You are not going to die!” the kwami rolled her eyes, “Though I do think an apology is in order.”

“An apology to whom?” the designer said dryly, “All the designs I never got to finish,” she shot a forlorn look over to the latest dress she had been working on, mouthing an I’m sorry to the piece.

“No, silly,” Tikki giggled, “I meant to Adrien.”

“What?!” Marinette scrambled backwards, placing a pillow in front of her for protection, “Are you insane?! I just told you he was going to kill me and you want me to face my death now! No thanks, I’ll let the shame get me first,” she buried her face in the pillow and let out a loud scream.

“Marinette, you know he’s going to be confused. You have to explain.”

“No I don’t,” she shook her head furiously, “If I explain Adrien will hate me for life and then I’ll never see what our three kids, Hugo, Emma, and Louis will look like and the-”

Tikki cut her off by swatting the pillow off of her face, “Marinette, go apologize!”

The girl whimpered, “Tikki, please!”

“Unless you want to apologize tomorrow in class as Marinette, you had better go now!” she gave her a small glare.

“B-but what if he hasn’t even seen the press release yet?” the designer asked hopefully before Tikki’s glare grew even harsher, “Alright, alright! I’ll go!” she surrendered, before calling on her transformation.

Ladybug nervously swung her way over to Adrien’s mansion. Her movements were slow and hesitant, unlike the quick pace she had set when she had raced over to her own home. She chewed her lip nervously as she tapped the window tentatively. Closing her eyes, she counted to five before turning around, certain that the boy wasn’t home. Just as her yo-yo wrapped around a building and she was about to swing away, the window hurriedly open.

“Ladybug,” Adrien’s voice called from behind her, “Were you um, going somewhere?”

The heroine turned around slowly, scanning his face for any sign that he had seen the press release she had just given. Finding none, she breathed out a sigh of relief, “No, I was just um, never mind. Can I come in?” Ladybug gave him a confident smile.

“Sure,” he opened the window wider before a small smirk twitched at his lips. She stepped forward gratefully before Adrien leaned in close to her, tucking a stray strand of hair back into her ponytail.

“Uh, I-I, hi,” Ladybug breathed out nervously, her blue eyes widening as his own green ones flickered back at her mischievously.

“Hi,” he whispered back before his smirk grew wider, “I missed you today. After all, it’s not every day that your secret, superhero girlfriend informs the world that you’re dating before you even realized you were dating yourself.”

Her heart sank, as she shut her eyes closed tightly. She breathed in a deep breath through her nose in an attempt to calm herself.

Ok, so he knows about the press report. I can’t believe I thought he didn’t... It’s time for damage control.

“About that,” her two index fingers tapped together nervously, “That’s kinda the reason I came here. I wanted to apologize.”

“Apologize for what?” Adrien asked with a crooked smile, “For not telling me we were dating sooner?”

Ladybug nodded her head, “Yes! Exactly! I mean... wait, what? I meant that I was apologizing for telling the world that we were dating when we weren’t.”

“I figured,” he sighed, almost disappointedly? And what was that about? They weren’t actually dating... But it was cleared up by another bright smile, “So, why me?” Adrien plopped down on his couch.

“What do you mean?” she frowned down at him.

“Why out of everybody, did you pick me to be in a secret relationship with?”

“I, um, well, you see,” Ladybug chuckled nervously, “They were firing off these questions at me and I just kept getting more and more frustrated. And the next thing I knew, I was saying I was dating someone, when I wasn’t, and then after that, I was saying I was dating you.”

“Uh-huh,” Adrien nodded, “That still doesn’t answer my question of why me, though.”

She gulped nervously. I can’t very well say that it’s because I have a crazy crush on you, now can I, her eyes darted around the room. “You were just the first name that popped into my head, I guess.”

“I see,” he seemed to pout at the floor and before she could ponder on what that meant, he pushed up off the couch and walked over to her.

“I promise as soon as I see another reporter I’ll clear this whole thing up!” Ladybug said determinedly, “I honestly didn’t mean to drag you into this whole mess!”

“Ladybug,” Adrien placed a hand on her shoulder delicately, “It’s alright! I really don’t mind. I was more shocked than anything,” he scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably.

“Y-you don’t mind?” her blue eyes blinked at him, “B-but why not?”

“Well, um,” he cleared his throat, “I don’t know. I guess I just figured you might have said my name for some reason other than random chance and it got my hopes up,”  he peered down at her through his long lashes.

“W-what?” Ladybug stuttered.

“Nevermind, it’s stupid,” Adrien chuckled nervously, “I suppose you’re leaving now, though. I’ll open the window for you.”

She grabbed onto his arm, pulling him back to her and frowned, “Adrien? Why would me saying that we were dating give you hope?”

“I don’t know, it was just a weird feeling I guess,” he ran a hand through his blonde hair, messing up its neat look.

“Don’t lie to me. Just tell me the truth.”

 Adrien sighed before glancing away from her, “It may be because, well, I might have just a tiny celebrity crush on you,” he winced as he flicked his eyes back to hers.

Ladybug gaped at him as she stared at him in shock. The superheroine attempted to form words but her lips didn’t seem to function as they flapped open and closed repeatedly, “I, you, huh, wuh?”

“And I’ve made things totally awkward, haven’t I?” he flinched before shutting his eyes closed, “I’m so sorry. You can just go now and completely forget what I just said.”

Shutting her lips together firmly, she ignored using words and instead pulled him down to her. Her lips connected with his slowly as his eyes popped wide open. Adrien scrambled off of her, letting out a startled yelp as he hit the wall, “I, you, huh, wuh?”

A smirk twitched at her lips by his lack of vocabulary, “I lied. It wasn’t random at all. I said your name because I have a giant crush on you. Is that alright?” Ladybug bit into her lower lip gently.

“Y-you’re not making fun of me?”

“No,” she giggled, “I wouldn’t have kissed you if I hadn’t felt the same way.”

“Can I kiss you again, then?” Adrien came forward slowly, his hand making contact with her cheek as he caressed it gently.

Ladybug leaned into his hand with a soft smile, “Yeah.”

He pulled her closer, gently brushing his lips against her own. They continued to explore the other’s mouth before Adrien leaned back, “Does this mean the world really did know we were dating before we did?”

“Shut up and just kiss me,” she laughed before his lips connected with her own once again.

[canyousevmyheavydirtysoul]

Bodyguard III: Avengers Assemble (Chapter 3) (B. Urie x Reader)

You stood cross-armed in the helicarrier lab, looking on with intense curiosity as Doctor Banner worked on the sceptre that Brendon and Steve had recovered from Loki.

“Anything?” you asked hopefully, taking one small step forward.

Bruce shook his head, narrowing his eyes as he leaned down to get a closer look at the alien object. “I’ve never seen anything like it. The electromagnetic wave readings are off the charts.”

“Hmph,” you chewed on your lip softly as you tentatively reached out for the weapon, your fingers hovering only millimetres above it.

There was a strange energy surrounding it – one that felt familiar – and it was almost as if it were daring you to explore it. But you knew better; it was still a dangerous alien object, after all, used to cause a ton of destruction – so you retracted your hand.

Blowing a raspberry, you treaded over to the desk and leaned back against it. “Well, at least we-“

Your eyes caught sight of someone entering the lab, striding purposefully toward you, and you sighed agitatedly.

“Save it,” you said firmly, already knowing where this was headed.

“You’re a crazy person,” Brendon noted, coming to a sharp halt right in front of you.

You feigned confusion, looking up. “By whose definition?”

“Mine,” he hissed, “Do you have any idea how badly that situation could’ve gone?”

Pushing yourself off of the desk, you matched Brendon’s stance and frowned slightly; Bruce tossed occasional weary glances at the two of you.

“The situation was going badly,” you corrected, then cocked an eyebrow, “then I showed up and fixed it. You’re welcome.”

Stepping around the agent, you started walking away from him. He gripped your arm to stop you, turning around so that you were both facing each other again.

“What if Loki had been down there?” he persisted, frowning much harder than you had, “We still don’t know what he wants, (Y/N), and-“

You ripped yourself from his grasp, standing your ground. “Clearly this hasn’t penetrated your thick skull yet, so lemme say it again – I. Can. Handle. Myself. Loki is not a threat to me.”

On the other side of the lab window, dozens of S.H.I.E.L.D police escorted a handcuffed Loki. You and Brendon simultaneously turned to look at him; as did Bruce, who stopped working on the Chitauri sceptre and raised his head.

As he passed, the god of mischief eyed you and Bruce, nodding and smiling as he walked. You felt a strange sensation spread over you, and you shook your head lightly in an effort to refocus yourself. Bruce rubbed his head, creasing his brow.

Brendon looked at you, clenched his jaw and with a small shake of his head, headed out of the lab.

 Detention section, S.H.I.E.L.D Helicarrier.

Now free from his cuffs, Loki stood contained in a large glass cell held by hydraulic rigs. Fury walked up to the control panel of the cell.

“In case it’s unclear,” he called out, “you try to escape, you so much as scratch that glass…”

The Director pressed a button that opened up a hatch underneath the cell. Loki peered down as much as he could from inside the glass. Without seeing, the sounds of gusting wind itself would be enough to make a man tremble with worry. Not a god, though; Loki remained unbothered.

“…thirty thousand feet, straight down in a steel trap. You get how that works?!” Fury closed the hatch, pointing at Loki, “Ant,” then pointing at the button which would drop the trap, “Boot.”

Loki smirked, standing smug despite his circumstances. “It’s an impressive cage. Not built, I think, for me.”

“Built for something a lot stronger than you,” Fury nodded.

“Oh, I’ve heard.” Loki looked into the camera.

In the briefing room, the rest of you watched over the monitor. Everyone was watching intently, but none more so than you and Bruce.

“The mindless beast, makes play he’s still a man,” Loki continued, looking to Fury, “How desperate are you, that you call upon such lost creatures to defend you?”

Fury widened his eyes. “How desperate am I? You threaten my world with war. You steal a force you can’t hope to control.” The Director walked as he spoke, right up to the glass. “You talk about peace and you kill ‘cause it’s fun. You have made me very desperate. You might not be glad that you did.”

“Ooh,” Loki teased, squinting his eyes, “It burns you to have come so close. To have the Tesseract, to have power, unlimited power. And for what? A warm light for all mankind to share, and then to be reminded what real power is.”

With a soft scoff and a smile, Fury turned and started to walk away. “Well, you let me know if Real Power wants a magazine or something.”

He walked off, leaving Loki in the glass cell. The god looked back at the camera, smirking.

 Briefing room.

Steve watched until the monitor went black. Thor, who didn’t even look, just listened, stood there, torn apart. The rest of you just stood in stunned silence. After a long moment…

“He really grows on you, doesn’t he?” Bruce spoke sarcastically.

“Loki’s gonna drag this out,” Steve said, “So, Thor, what’s his play?”

Thor finally came to, speaking over his shoulder as he answered the captain. “He has an army called the Chitauri. They’re not of Asgard or any world known. He means to lead them against your people. They will win him the earth. In return, I suspect, for the Tesseract.”

Genuinely stunned by the thought, Steve spoke again. “An army? From outer space?”

Putting two and two together, Bruce voiced his thoughts. “So he’s building another portal. That’s what he needs Erik Selvig for.”

The name caught Thor’s attention. “Selvig?”

“He’s an astrophysicist,” Bruce elaborated.

“He’s a friend,” you explained Thor’s reaction to Bruce.

Natasha spoke next, setting herself down on an empty chair. “Loki has him under some kind of spell, along with two of ours,” she said solemnly.

“I wanna know why Loki let us take him,” Brendon spoke on his concerns, the most bothered by the god’s presence, “He’s not leading an army from here.”

“I don’t think we should be focusing on Loki,” Bruce shook his head, “That guy’s brain is a bag full of cats, you could smell crazy on him.”

Offended by the doctor’s words, Thor glared at him threateningly. “Have care how you speak. Loki is beyond reason, but he is of Asgard, and he’s my brother.”

“He killed eighty people in two days,” Natasha informed.

“He’s adopted.”

Thinking back to the issue at hand, Bruce posed a question. “Iridium. What did they need the Iridium for?”

“It’s a stabilizing agent,” Tony answered as he walked in with Coulson; he turned to the agent, speaking a couple sentences in a hushed voice before turning his attention back to the rest of you, “Means the portal won’t collapse on itself, like it did at S.H.I.E.L.D.”

Approaching Thor, the genius lowered his gaze slightly and gently tapped the back of his hand against the god’s bulging arm. “No hard feeling, Point Break. You’ve got a mean swing.” Bringing the subject back to the Iridium, he continued explaining, “Also, it means the portal can open as wide and stay open as long as Loki wants.”

Tony looked to the S.H.I.E.L.D crew working on computers below and called out to them. “Uh, raise the mid-mast, ship the top sails. That man is playing Galaga! Thought we wouldn’t notice. But we did.”

Covering his eye, he looked around. “How does Fury do this?”

“He turns,” Maria answered.

“Sounds exhausting. The rest of the raw materials, Agent Barton can get his hands on pretty easily. Only major component he still needs is a power source.” Tony looked around the monitors and placed a button-sized hacking implant under Fury’s station, without anyone noticing, “A high energy density, something to kick start the cube.”

Maria scoffed. “When did you become an expert in thermonuclear astrophysics?”

“Last night.” Tony gave the slimmest of smirks. “The packet, Selvig’s notes, the Extraction Theory papers. Am I the only one who did the reading?”

“Does Loki need any particular kind of power source?” Brendon queried, his mind racing as he tried to think of possible options.

“He’s got to heat the cube to a hundred twenty million Kelvin just to break through the Coulomb barrier,” Bruce explained.

“Unless,” Tony contradicted, “Selvig has figured out how to stabilise the quantum tunnelling effect.”

“Well, if he could do that, he could achieve Heavy Ion Fusion at any reactor on the planet.”

Tony looked absolutely thrilled as he held out both hands and gestured to Bruce. “Finally, someone who speaks English.”

Tony and Bruce shook hands. A glimmer in their eyes shone as the mutual respect for each other showed.

“It’s good to meet you, Doctor Banner. Your work on anti-electron collisions is unparalleled. And I’m a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster.”

Bruce looked down. “Thanks.”

The Director walked in, then. “Doctor Banner is only here to track the cube,” he said to Tony, “I was hoping you might join him.”

“Let’s start with that stick of his,” Steve called out, “It may be magical, but it works an awful lot like a Hydra weapon.”

“I don’t know about that,” you breathed out, arching one brow, “But it is powered by the cube. I could feel it.”

Fury nodded. “And I’d like to know how Loki used it to turn three of the sharpest men I know into his personal flying monkeys.”

“Moneys?” Thor looked around, puzzled, “I do not understand.”

“I do!” Steve piped excitedly, “I understood that reference.”

Brendon and Tony rolled their eyes, while the captain looked proud of himself.

Averting his attention back to his new friend, Tony spoke to Bruce. “Shall we play, doctor?” he gestured in the direction of the lab.

As Bruce and Tony walked out, the Galaga player turned ever so discreetly, watching as the rest of your group dispersed, and went back to playing.

_______________________________

Thank you for reading x

Taglist:

@arosebyname @avengertrash21 @tiffisnotnormal  @darknessdancing @raversam @theieroenthusiast @the-ghost-of-hemingway @laerkers @peters-vlogs @hockeyswag-boll  @username-number-01834 @untilyouburnallofthewitches @underscoredarcy  @aminasmells @becausebands @converseskyline  @vinyloider @attractiveugly  @twentzyonepirates  @tegan-eva @i-only-date-flower-boys @jishwatylrandtop  @blueskiesbleakeyes @robinruns @hi-ho-and-hello @svintsandghosts  @iamafishandigosplish  @sunshineandapplepie @kealohilani-tepise  @bookworm104 @sheridans-dynamos @justawriterinprogress  @anotherwriterinprogress @sillylandcalzonespy

[roseamongroses]

Antithesis: “what do you have? “ I have a kNIFE” “NO”

[Specific-Summary]: They should expect growing pains. For not everything to feel right or make sense. That doesn't mean it'll always hurt, nor does it mean they can't have fun along the way. It's senior year. Everything may be different. It won't be senior year for long. Everything will be okay.

[General Warnings]: Implied Emotional Abuse, Implied Physical Abuse, Bad Parents are Bad Parents, Mild Sexual Content/jokes,Mentioned Homophobia, Mentions of underage drinking (backround), Some Catcalling,Cursing , Self Hate,implied pregnancy talk/inability to become pregnant, adults arguing where the “kid” can hear it, adults drinking,

[Tags/mood:] highschool au,  fluff and angst but its all good, chat fic, teen stress, its flordia no snow we die like men [Pairing:] Roceit (Roman Sanders/ Deceit Sanders), hinted future/possible logince/roloceit/loceit [Characters]Roman Sanders/Deceit (Dmitri) Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Remy (Sleep) Sanders, Nate Sanders, Dragon Witch (Diana) Remus “The Duke” Sanders (minor/brief)

(Ao3) (Previously)

(8) (9) (10) (11) (12) (13) (14) (15)

(16) (17) (18) 

L: I May Have Lost Roman

V: nice

P: not nice :)

V: i feel vaguely threatened

Rem:@L how the fuck did you manage that Rem: nvm i know how just give me details

L:I don’t know ? One second we were at check out L: Next minute he was Gone and Nieve is looking suspicious

L:Hold on lemme ask Dmitri

V: why is he there

L: I mean he’s actually pretty chill L: But he dropped Roman off and Nieve got attached L:I’m...not sure if she’s planning on letting him go?

V:logan, my friend, my buddy, V:the only person in this chat with basic reading comprehension

Rem: that’s pretty fair

P: it really is tbh

V: Send. Pictures.

L: Okay L: Slight Issue

V: you lost the snake too

L: I lost Dmitri too and Nieve is not spilling

Rem: oh they’re defeinately fucking

L:...Where? The bathroom?

Rem: Don’t knock it till you try it ;)

V: not to be that guy but im vetoing this discussion V: cause thats a Yikes even for you Remy

L: Alright time to find them

Rem: check ;))) the;))) bathrooms ;;))))

L: Remy.

Rem: alrighlright too far ill stop

L: Thank you.

V: keep me updated V: i only have silence and physics homework as company

L:Huh L:Found them

L: Roman….found a katanna…

V: im sorry WHAT V: Why The Fuck Does He Have A Sword

Rem: drop the location of that store man

L: 1) It’s a Katanna L: 2)I will certainly Not. L: 3) He’s trying to convince Dmitri why he should have it

L…..and Dmitri looks more amused then concerned

V: if I can't have a tarantula he sure as hell cant have a sword

L:I told him it was probably fake/ poorly made and that he should take the time to invest the proper skill in money in a real one

V: goddamit logan you cant logic roman.

L: It worked. He put it back. L: So I say I can do what I want with roman

Rem: some spicy takes from the chats only brain cell ;)

---

“So you’re turning eighteen, in a few months. ” His aunt said, dabbing her cheeks with a napkin. She still managed to hold an air of prestige despite getting utterly shitfaced the night before. Her appointments have been going well.

Dmitri looked up, masking his surprise and holding his tongue.

Dr. Montag looked over, quieting the running water and placing the dish was he was cleaning down, “Really?” he said, brushing his hands, “You got any plans?” he asked, Dmitri.

“Oh we usually do something small,” His aunt interjected, “But seeing as he’s my father’s favorite grandchild,” Only grandchild, “He’s is flying from Paris to join us. And he was never a man of modesty so I’ve been thinking about doing something special for the occasion.”

Oh.

Dmitri fought the smile creeping on his face, ducking his head. He shouldn’t be surprised that she remembered after all if his grandfather was visiting. It’s how he got his phone, laptop, his car.

It’s probably why she puts up with him, to begin with. Cause it wasn’t guilt.

“--We should get your hair cut,” She continued, and Dmitri snapped out of his thoughts, “Maybe invite Diana--he’d like her,” she murmured.

“Diana and I a-” He closed his mouth, and his aunt’s eyes shot over.

“You broke up?” She narrowed her eyes, examining her nails, “Huh, makes sense seeing as...” she gestured at him vaguely, “So who have you been sneaking around with?”

“I’m not sneaking around with anyone,” Dmitri said, meeting her gaze. And technically he was right, it’s not sneaking if she just hasn’t been asking. And he’s given up on telling.

Dr. Montag’s eyebrows knitted together confused,” Well that isn’t true,”

Dmitri’s eyes went wide, stomach sinking.

His Aunt’s grin spread, “Oh really?”

Fuck, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck--

“He’s been helping me out, hon,” Dr. Montag set down a glass of water and pills beside her plate, “You’ve been so stressed lately,” he looked guilty and produced some tickets, “I thought I’d surprise you.”

Her face softened and like that the tension left the room. Those two got to linger in whatever lovey-dovey spell had taken hold of them in the last few months, but Dmitri was still on edge.

She still kept him on edge, but he could get her back. Even the playing field. Anytime he could leave this—Anytime he could flip this switch and put her on edge and make her—

He stopped eating, setting his plate aside.

He felt sick.

---

R:helllloooo R:anyone up R: sigh R: allll by mySELLLLF

L: Roman?

R: the one and lonely yes hello human contact???

L: Are you alright? It’s 3 am why are you still awake?

R: why are YOU up mm????

L: My parents have newborn twins. What’s your excuse?

R: well fuck got me there

R: i was texting dee but he was rlly tired and i stILL can’t sleep

L: Any particular reason?

R: u m

L: Private chat?

R: please

- [TheTruthAboutTheMoon]

TheWalkingMouth: Okay shoot

Cowboy:it's stupid

TheWalkingMouth: I’ll tell you if it's stupid or not just say it

Cowboy: i just….like Cowboy: it's all kinda….hitting me a ll at once and i Really don’t like thinking about it but i cant bottle shit up either like you bastards so i feel like the human equivelent og a washing machine with too much laundry in it

TheWalkingMouth: Then don’t? TheWalkingMouth: Even if it's too ‘stupid’ for me I’m sure Dmitri wouldn’t mind

Cowboy: yeah but i feel like im going to say something shitty to him i Cowboy: like we should talk about it Cowboy: and i will Cowboy: but not now--later when it's not too stressful for either of us

TheWalkingMouth: Why would you say something shitty?

Cowboy: idk id jst get frustrated trying to explain it Cowboy: like hes smart as hell and probbaly get it without me saying anything but like Cowboy: I have neither the patience nor articulation right now to explain like a civil person and he doesnt need me being shitty about it

Cowboy:like,,,,,for example,,,,, if he fucks up in school, he’ll get recommended a tutor and teachers would assume hes doing his best and hes such a sweet and quiet boy

Cowboy: like he is sweet!!but hes a little shit too!! And gets away with it!!! Half those pranks he pulled on virgil, as Iconic as they were he never got in trouble for them!!!

Cowboy: when i fuck up i

Cowboy: god it's stupid

TheWalkingMouth: Might not get a second chance? Yeah I get it.

TheWalkingMouth:Remember when I first transferred here? None of the teachers would take me seriously bc of my accent and if they did, they were afraid of me. I could repeat something another kid said word for word and still be told I had an attitude.

Cowboy: god i remembered that Cowboy: you answered his yes or no questions in a fuckin montone, quiet ass voice and he legit called in the office cause he got scared of a goddamn freshman

Cowboy: But ye when i fuck up Cowboy: im suddenly the lazy ass brown kid who should spend less time corrupting youth with my feminine hips and curls Cowboy: like it's not like a lot of them say it outright but it feels like if im not perfect im fufilling all the stereotypes

TheWalkingMouth: Ah okay, rant away

Cowboy: OK like like like im not like virgil right?? in a lot of ways and it fuckin shows

Cowboy: he’s been planning on going into engineering since sixth grade meanwhile i only got my shit together in highschool

Cowboy: and like now that im here/???what now??? My mother expects me to have my shit together meanwhile im over here freaking the fuck out over whether not it's worth it to even try Cowboy: like yes mother i want to go to an art/or librel arts school that may or may not accept me that we may or may not afford to find a career in who the hell knows because if i have to sit in a healthcare class or a applied mathmatics class like you did i miight actually shank the professor????

Cowboy: that i dread the thought of not trying to explore my options outside of this fucking state but i dread the thought of going bc i cant stand the thought of being away from home but i cant fucking find a reason to stay cause everyone i love is leaving or planning their own life anyway???

Cowboy: like remys gunna fuck off to who knows where regardless of whether or not he has a plans or money, pattons gunna take care of his grandmother whereever the fuck a canada ,moms moving in with tia, virgils already mentally flipping me off ready to fuck nasa , and i only fucking hope dmitri even getss the chance to choose where he goes but hes g o n e and i die from yearning behind a screen like the gay victorian i am , and you….i actually dont know

TheWalkingMouth: Teaching for either biology or physics

Cowboy: huh it fits but what about chemistry??

TheWalkingMouth: Fuck chemistry.

Cowboy: oh thank god we’re on the same page

TheWalkingMouth: Anyway, I assume you’re more worried about whether you should apply rather then if you could get in?

Cowboy: i think so

TheWalkingMouth: Well if my opinion means anything to you

Cowboy: more than you’re assuming but yeah continue

TheWalkinMouth: Wait

Cowboy: nothing nothing continue

TheWalkingMouth: Okay-- I think you should go for it but you don’t need to dive head first into it and commit to everything 100% like virgil did.

TheWalkingMouth: You’re allowed to keep your options open, to have backup plans for back up plans

TheWalkingMouth: It doesn’t mean you’re not passionate about your art. Doesn’t mean you’re inevitably going to get a office job and abandon all your dreams. It means you’re being smart and not backing yourself into a corner

TheWalkingMouth:It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay not to have it all figured out

TheWalkingMouth: Nobody does.

TheWalkingMouth: Even if no one else gives you a second chance at least give yourself a second chance.

TheWalkingMouth: It’s perfectly normal to be afraid to fuck up and get fucked over TheWalkingMouth: That doesn’t mean you will everytime TheWalkingMouth: And it certainly doesn’t mean it's the end

Cowboy:

Cowboy:

Cowboy:

[...Cowboy is typing…]

---

@daflangstlairde

@ace-anx

@cataclysm-al

[echoeternally]

6, 10, and 12 for ENY, thank you in advance.

6: What makes this fic special or different from all your other fics?10: Why did you choose this pairing for this particular story?12: What do you like least about this fic?

I was answering this, and Tumblr reloaded, deleted my original answers, and now I’m like half-dead from writing so much and losing it. (I especially lost prime answers for the first question.) Lemme try recapturing stuff.

Going right for the juicy stuff, eh? Ok, let’s see what we’ve got!

6) Its length, lmao. That’s just a joke, but it really is the longest I’ve written.

I think a lot of what makes it unique is it’s kind of an all-encompassing type of story, where it hits a lot of canon material, but presents less explored concepts, and it just delivers it how I like and wanted it to.

So far, I haven’t really written a hero/villain romance that hits the same notes that this one does, and I’ll explore that a little more below with the next question. But, like, the balance struggle for heroics and villainy, the morality between not just the protagonists but the entire cast, that helps drive it so well. And it just captures everyone’s involvement so nicely.

It also relies on a lot of the history that I’ve studied and gained from playing and learning about the Super Mario franchise at large, and it feels as though it hits a lot of series. Fanfics generally pick at canon material that they can utilize and bend around to their will, but what I like doing with ENY is actually rearranging so many ideas into a new scope for them.

Even small things that don’t feel noteworthy can fall into line for this. Sports and spin-offs that I would ordinarily hand-wave as major involvement for the series became a neat background that I explored and exploited not only for Bowser and Mario’s relationship, but Daisy’s general involvement for things. Random encounters from games like Super Mario RPG that involved a super rare and mostly forgettable species (Shamans) ended up getting a huge role increase because of how nicely their utility weaved into the fanfic’s story, what with their special magic powers, the few characters that they seemed to have sired for later spin-offs, and this general mysterious exotic flavor that they can add in.

Those are just a couple of points that I touched on, but like, this kind of story allows that depth and exploration for the franchise at a greater scope. It goes from even the earliest days of the franchise (yes, even touching back to Donkey Kong) all the way to more recent installments (Galaxy games, and very recently Odyssey), while still picking up around the history of the series along the way.

And I don’t think any of my other fanfics capture that same kind of scope, or show that presentation nearly as well. Most stuff that I’ve written kind of goes around ideas, “What-If” scenarios that play out, and don’t have a huge amount to go over. Some are just answers to ideas that people shared on Tumblr, little scribbles that play with similar concepts.

The biggest counterpart fanfic series, my Pokémon stories, also don’t take the same routes to explore the franchise. Whereas my Mario fanfic relies on its history and canon to get involved with everything, my Pokémon fanfics take elements from the series and morph it into something else. That’s not a mistake or a shortcoming at all; it’s just the two different ways that I wanted to write the stories for each franchise.

Finally, I forgot to even mention this last time, but the reader responses are also a huge part of writing for me, and I love the energy, the excitement that people get from this story. And that just really keeps me into it, and I want to keep interacting with people with the story itself. That makes it so fulfilling.

The rest will be below the cut!

10) Years and years ago (I hate that I can use that now, lmao), I used to read a multitude of fanfics, but never had an account. Bowser/Mario stuff was part of it, nothing that I recall very well anymore, but it was part of the collection of things that I had read.

I just remember that none of it reached 10 chapters, nothing delved deep into it, and I was like, “Come on, give me more! This a combination to explore!” But this pairing was so rare compared to the more mainstream (and hetero) counterparts, so it wasn’t an idea a lot of people played with, or were considered weird for doing so, I’d wager.

And yet, hero/villain pairings were something that people really enjoyed around the Internet and in fandoms. I think what tipped me into favor with it was that there were official explorations of dynamics between Batman and the Joker, and professional writers took to exploring Joker’s character as someone that was romantically invested in Batman, obviously to the point of obsession, but like, genuinely into him.

So, couple that, with me being like, “But we can do more!” and a bubbling interest in fanfics, to the breaking point where I end up going, “Fine, I’ll do it!” And then I made my account, and tossed up a story where Bowser confesses an interest in Mario, explores a load of things that work in favor of their pairing, tackles everything going against them, and had him go, “Screw all of that, I still want you anyway.”

Then one of my readers went, “Hey, what’s Mario’s reaction to that?” And then I wrote up the counterpart for that. More people were like, “Hey, that’s cool, can we get more?” So, I wrote up the story launching off from there.

Their dynamic is fun to explore, because they seem like a good fit for each other. Even Bowser’s desires of conquest can be twisted in favor of a potential relationship for the two. And it’s great, because you can really, really hit all of the fallout notes not just between the two of them, but their people and world around them. The reactions just keep going, and the longer it takes to finally hit them, the bigger the blowouts can be, or they can be a lot different when you stop to think about them. Because Mario and Bowser are definitely connected deeply to the entire Mushroom Kingdom, so it’s not just a small thing, and it’s not something that people can expect to just happen. That makes it so exciting to follow the two of them.

Also, I discovered that I have a soft spot for Knight/Royal romances. I didn’t realize it at first, and now it’s just kind of a thing I fall into a lot.

12) You know, I don’t know, because I kind of like a lot of it, really. If I had to really pick something, it would end up based off of reception, not really based on what I wrote.

And honestly, I think even then, I still liked what I’ve written so far for the story. If I go back and carefully re-read every little bit, I’ll probably find stuff that’s weak, stuff that’s dated, and other sour notes.

But that means I have to scavenge for it, and off the top of my head, I can’t think of anything that I really don’t like about ENY. It’s kind of been my genuine pleasure to write the story, and I’ve enjoyed all of it.

Maybe that’s a bit of a cop-out? It’s really how I feel though. Even stuff that bubbles to mind now, where I’m like, “Oh wait, that chapter wasn’t great,” or “Oh, people didn’t quite take to that,” that still includes stuff that I enjoyed myself, so I can’t honestly admit to regretting it.

[dust2dust34]

Hi Bre, I love your writing and was wondering if there's anything you could tease about your Blood Hands rewrite? How will it be different than the original? When do you expect to start posting? Any possibility of an excerpt? Thanks for answering!

Hello, beautiful anon, and thank you!

Wow, you guys, I have been in a constant, near-tears giddy explosion of feels about the asks I’ve been getting for Blood Hands. I’m so happy to see the excitement for this fic! This thing is my baby, I have poured my heart and soul into it. I recently told my beta that Blood Hands is my every fic indulgence and that’s exactly what it is. I love it so much. I’m not really talking about it at all to anyone, so that’s the story behind my random tag posts where I just babble about whatever I’m doing at the moment. That they inspire asks fills me with glee. And they will definitely be continuing, because I need some outlet. 

It is not done, but I am 144k into it and there’s still a lot of story to tell. (I’m expecting my amazing beta to send me an email that just says: “Look, I get that you need to explore this hug, but you don’t need 5k for that one thing alone.” AND SHE WILL BE RIGHT. That number up there is word vomit, I haven’t edited anything yet.) I have literally cut myself off from the world to write it, which I only do when I’m in a zone. And I’ve been in a zone, finally. 

My main struggle with rewriting this thing has been just that: the rewrite. Taking the old chapters and fitting them into the new version. Lemme tell you something, okay, it’s been really hard for me. Because a lot of the moments in the original version are cornerstones in my mind, and I banked on them not changing. But the kicker is that they have to change, because the story has changed. So that’s been fun. (Haha... ha... haaa.) But all those moments are still there, they’re just different now. In a good way. A very good way.

I don’t know when I’ll start posting just yet! 

How will it be different from the original? That is a loaded question. I’ll start by saying I was very devoted to the idea of keeping Blood Hands very canon-compliant when I wrote the original fic. That is no longer the case. Oliver and Felicity’s dynamic is wildly different. (I literally had a moment when I was in Hawaii last year, when after staring at the ocean for 30 minutes it just clicked what I had to do differently in this version. This story has tormented me, y’all.) I still wanted to keep it canon-ish going in, so one of my struggles has been getting all the emotional development that we’ve seen onscreen happening in the space of a few days. So as you can imagine things are very, very tense and as a result, those very, very tense things have forced Oliver and Felicity into Situations. And as we all know, things happen in Situations. I also wanted to mine the shit out of every single thing ever so I really dove into the whys and hows of each scene, which took me down altered paths and changed basically everything, and that just circled me right back to the “cornerstones” I had in my mind about this fic and how they had to change.

It’s been a writing adventure, for sure.

The story/plot itself is the same, none of that has changed, although I have added more story for Felicity, to give her more motivation instead of just reacting to Oliver as she mostly did in the first version. I also decided Oliver needed to be way darker, so Blood Hands is basically what Arrow could have been if it had been on Netflix. 

It’s bloody, it’s filled with curse words, it’s violent, and it’s sexy. 

(And oh yes, anon who sent an ask about angst, there is so much angst.)

Guys, I’m pretty sure Blood Hands is my love letter to fanfiction.

Thank you so much for the asks. They fuel me, I cannot express enough how much they mean to me. I still won’t be talking about Blood Hands at length past my random Instagram stories and my tag posts, because I have learned that I’m that writer who totally agrees with Kurt Vonnegut about my projects: “Write to please just one person. If you open a window and make love to the world, so to speak, your story will get pneumonia.”

But I will leave you with a tiny excerpt from the chapter I’m currently writing:

Blood Hands Excerpt

“Hi,” she whispered.

“Hi,” he breathed, so soft it was barely audible.

Even if she had missed it, though, she felt the reciprocation in his touch.

He tilted his head, staring at her with something akin to wonder. She didn’t feel his hand moving until his fingers slid over her jaw, her ear, into her hair as he cupped her face. Her heart stuttered, heat coiling in the pit of her stomach, her lips parting on a tiny gasp. His thumb slipped over her chin, grazing the edge of her bottom lip, tracing the corner of her mouth.

She licked her lips and his parted in return.

Thank you again!!!

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #170

this one’s a few days old and am just getting to posting it. don’t feel like rereading to change some old answers tho.

Do you tell your best friend everything? What might you omit? If she asked about a subject, I'd tell her. I wouldn't just be like "hey here's a little factoid I don't like talking about." Have you ever experienced unrequited love? Yes. In your current or most recent romantic relationship, do/did you feel as though one of you settled? Not at all. What did your ex (or one of your exes) consider to be a dealbreaker in you? My depression. What seemingly small change have you made to improve your life this year? More drive to be an adult. Make the decision to try as hard as mentally possible to be more open about myself and not so scared of being found as "too weird." Does anyone in your family suffer from mental illness or substance abuse? Don't get me started on the first. I only know of my dad being a recovered alcoholic. What is the biggest gap in your employment history? How did/will you explain it to future employers? 0-19ish. Wasn't in the mental state to. Is there any part of your sexual/romantic history that you have not told your current significant other about or that you will not tell future partners about? She knows a lot. There's just one thing I'm not comfortable talking about yet. There's nothing I absolutely won't tell at any point - if you're in a serious relationship, they have the right to know. Has anyone ever tried to change your mind about something very personal, such as religion or wanting children? Children, yes. Colleen especially was convinced I was going to change my mind to an annoying degree. People have pushed me being a vet a whole lot, too. Do you ever hear about old school friends? Where are you high school friends now? Well, through FB. Most have stable jobs, some are extremely intelligent students headed towards amazing careers, some are parents. Most fell off the face of the earth. What is the most fun you can remember ever having under the influence? Cards Against Humanity. Has your Facebook relationship status ever been set to 'it’s complicated’? Why? Nooooo, and I seriously wish that option didn't even exist. Drama bait, whether intentional or not. What is the most beautiful/interesting name that you’ve ever personally known someone to have? Alon. Have you ever developed feelings for someone whose sexual orientation was incompatible with yours? Yes. How many relationships have you been in that actually got sexual? One. When making an entrance in to a party, do you make your presence known? Do you slip in and look for someone you know? Do you sneak in quietly and find a safe spot to roost? Me?????????????? At a party?????????????????????? What is your strongest sense? Maybe you don't count this because it's not a "real" sense, but I would say I have an incredibly strong "sixth sense" of just knowing when something is wrong, even with people I don't know well. I pick up bad emotions easily. But if you're just talking sight, hearing, taste, touch, and smell, I suppose smell? Or taste. Could be why I'm so picky. What is the strangest thing you believed as a child? There is NO telling. I believed some wild shit. HAHAHA OH MY GOD WAIT NO I BELIEVED I HAD "ANIMAL POWERS" UNTIL THE END OF ELEMENTARY SCHOOL. Like, I could go into a "mode" where I had capabilities like those in certain animals, like with kangaroo powers, I could jump higher. God that was so embarrassing to write jfc what the fuck was I on. Who performs the most random acts of kindness out of everyone you know? Mom. She gives food, water, and sometimes money to homeless people she trusts as actually being without a home. There are two or three people she's actually "friends" with. Are you more likely to avoid conflict or engage it head-on? A V O I D What is something about yourself that you hope will change, but probably never will? I make situations awkward. Just social anxiety in general. What’s a strange occurrence you’ve experienced but have never (or rarely) shared with anyone? Okay, so I don't think I believe in angels, and I'm 99% sure this was a dream by now. But once as a little kid, I have a *very* strong memory of getting out of bed and going outside because I felt I needed to see something, and two swans came to the porch, turning into my grampa and favorite cat that had died. Then I went back inside, and that's all I remember. Still to this day that shit didn't feel like a dream, but. It probably was. What do you think about more than anything else? The future. What’s your all-time favorite town or city? Why? I dunno. If you could restore one broken relationship, which would it be? The friendship with Megan. Do you Skype? With Sara. Have you ever called anyone ‘bro’ other than your actual brother? I'll call p much anyone that. Have you ever blocked someone on MySpace before? Maybe? What is the best kind of pizza in your opinion? Pan meat lovers omfg. Stick with jalapeno tho with trying to at least lean towards vegetarianism. Is there something that someone has done to you that you cannot forgive? Eh... I think I've forgiven him. Do you scream at scary parts in a horror flick? No. What is your favorite restaurant? Olive Garden. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? No. Are any of your pets “overweight”? No. How do you feel about weed? I'm totally for it medicinally. Helps with too many things. Otherwise, for reasons I've said in many old surveys, I don't believe it should be smoked. We already complain enough about cigarettes and lung cancer. How many people have you kissed that you weren’t dating? None. Who was the last person that ditched you? How did you react? Mini, I guess. Was hurt as fuck for years until I recently confronted her, and we're cool now. Who is your best friend of the opposite sex? Girt is like... my only male friend besides Dad. What size are the pants you’re wearing? Large, probably? Were you a fan of Michael Jackson before he died? I went neither way. Liked some songs, didn't like some, no opinion on others. Can you spot constellations in the night sky? Only the Big or Little Dipper. I dunno the difference. What kind of shampoo did you last use? I dunno exactly. Mom just put some in a smaller, nameless bottle for while I'm at Sara's. It's probably Suave, though. If you had a hippie bus, what would it look like? Gimme all the peace signs and trippy patterns. Have you ever hitchhiked? No. Would you rather hike a mountain or explore a cave? EXPLORE A CAVE BITCH Would you rather wear a flower crown or veil? For my wedding, probably a veil. I can't see a flower crown going with a (probably) black dress lmao. Do you go barefoot often? I'm always barefoot in the house, but outside, I always have shoes. What is your favorite thing to get high off of? N/A What type of tattoo do you want? Most of the ones I want hold personal meaning. There's few I want to get for solely aesthetic purposes. What is your favorite insect? Butterflies. Favorite constellation? *shrug* Beach wedding, forest wedding, or English countryside wedding? Forest! Does pineapple belong on pizza? NO. Do you have any big plans for November? No. What upcoming event are you most looking forward to? Christmas. I doubt Halloween's gonna be anything I'd like it to be. What was the last song you heard? "Letter" by Mother Mother is on. Compared to someone else of your age and gender; do you feel that you have a lot to offer someone? HAHAHAHA NO. How many days a week do you work? N/A Is there ONE person you feel more connected to than others? Sara and Mom. Where did your eye color come from? Mom's dad had blue eyes, I think. Have you ever been in a recording studio? No. What is your worst relationship quality? I'm paranoid. I'm that "do you still like me?" person after marriage, I'm sure. What was your most recent serious injury? Does sun poisoning from Hell itself count? When was the last time you baked something for someone? Never lmao. Would you rather be kissed on the neck or on the lips? I mean it depends on the mood. What is one thing you’re not looking forward to in the next week? I'm going home Wednesday. Would you consider Christmas your favorite holiday? Second-fave. How many chances do you normally give someone before giving up on them? Way too fucking many. But it also depends on the offense and person. Did you parents know what gender you were before you were born? Yeah. Are you for or against inter-racial relationships? Totally for. Would you say you’re more of a pessimist or optimist? I'm definitely a realist, but if I had to pick, I lean more towards pessimism. Have you ever been addicted to something unhealthy? No. When the holidays come around, do you watch holiday movies? Not really. Would you say you’re a friendly person or not so much? I think I'm very friendly, just shy and awkward socially. When was the last time you ate something from Burger King? LEMME TELL YOU THIS SHIT. Months ago, I went for a veggie burger. THESE. IDIOTS. Put all the normal shit BUT NO PATTY IN A FUCKING BUN. WHEN THEY HAVE ACTUAL VEGGIE PATTIES. We waited forever, so Mom was already in a bad mood. She went in and the manager was livid; she gave us a free drink and fries. BUT, the burger fucking sucked, it was so overcooked. Sooo that was fun. When someone mentions a song, does it make you wanna listen to it? Rarely if it's a song I don't know, unless I like the artist. Song title may interest me, too. Who is the nosiest person you know? Do you like them anyways? BITCH ME. Are you one of those people who like The Nightmare Before Christmas? Okay so, I first watched it in school and I didn't like it at all. Then I started loving it??? I have like sooo much Jack stuff. What’s the best food to have at a sleepover? Pizza! Do you like the yellow Cheetos better or the orange ones? You mean normal or hot? Gimme them spicy boiz. Do you know anybody with different colored eyes? No. Are any of your relatives vets? Don't believe so. Who cleans the most in your house? Mom. I really need to do it more. Do you own any shirts that cost over 100$? Jfc no. What about any shoes? Do you think that’s a lot of money for clothes? No, and obviously. What’s the movie theater in your town called? Uhhh I think Cinemax? How many minutes do you consider late? Over five. What kinds of food do you dunk into milk? Some cookies. Do you have any current or past teachers on your Facebook friends? No. Are there any baby pictures of you up? On FB? No. Do you have any friends who have bleached blonde hair? Maybe Alon still does, idk. Are you wearing any jewelry that a boyfriend/girlfriend gave you? No. Have you ever seen the last person you kissed cry? Yeah. What’s the last thing you were excited to eat? A donut sobs. Who's the most romantic person you ever went out with? I dunno... none were/are like especially romantic. Is there anything hanging from the ceiling in your room? Some Pyramid Head gift tags, a stuffed fae dragon from WoW, and a cool lantern. Have you ever seen the last person you hugged dressed up fancy? Not in person, but in pictures. (If your parents married), Do you know where they got engaged? No. What was the last picture you printed of? The reference I made of my tattoo for the artist. What restaurant has the best fries? Bojangle's the Queen. What does your mailbox look like? Just a basic black one. Have you ever gotten something stuck on the roof? Probs as a kid. Does your computer make a lot of noise? Not really. Unless it's overheating. Who did you last drink or smoke up with? Mom and Sara. How many board games do you own? Idk, there's just a few in a cabinet in the living room. What does your BIGGEST mug look like? We don't have any really big ones. Newest musical discovery? I really love Powerwolf. Last thing you cleaned? Clothes. What exactly do you carry around all your stuff in? Purse. What do you carry around, typically? Phone, iPod, wallet, hand sanitizer, keys... Where is your newest scar? There's still a little scab on the bottom of my tat from heavy shading, but it's almost healed. If you mean like, "real" scar, cat scratch on my right hand. Where is your oldest scar? Ummm probably this random one on the top of my right wrist. No clue where it came from, been there for years. Last thing you disposed of? A bottle, I think? Are you good at recovering from injuries? I dunno. How many different public restrooms have you used this week? I think just one, at the reptile convention. Do you have more piercings or tattoos? Currently tied at six, but piercings the day I get home and get my tongue redone. What color and type is your vehicle? N/A Looking to upgrade or add any time soon? N/A What animal do you have the most possessions *of*, or featuring? Meerkats. What do you use to wash your dishes? Ugh, hands, gross. I refuse to have my own home that doesn't have a dishwasher. Last thing you measured? Ummm probably water when I was making ramen. Last thing you weighed? Myself. Do you talk to your parent(s) [almost] every day? Ma, yes. Last person to tell you that you smell good? Sara although I don't see how, I needed a shower. @_@ Last person you told that they smell good? Sara. How many iPhones have you had? One, I think? Last person you ran into unexpectedly? Good question. Last compliment you received on your appearance? Uhhh idk. On your character/personality? Sara's mom pointed out this morning that she liked how I watch out for Sara and reminded her to call the library (applied there) and it made me so happy alkdjowie. Her approval is important to me. Do you remain friends with anyone you met at your first job? No. Woulda liked to, but. How many chargers do you have for your current cell phone? One, though Mom's fits mine, too. Do you have a good work/life balance? N/A Have you ever ordered pizza online? Yeah. Do you own a treadmill? No, but I want one. Have you ever signed up for a gym membership? Yeah. What color was the last fish you had? I couldn't tell you. Is there a garbage can in your room? What color is it? No. Have you ever read in the bathtub? I may've as a kid? Does your animal sleep with you? Roman, pretty much always. Rarely Teddy, but hhe doesn't like getting off the bed; I put him on it if he wants, so getting down's the only thing. Have you ever had to wear a hairnet? I think I have, but I don't recall for what? How many favorites do you have on YouTube? Holy shit idk. I used to favorite almost anything I liked, though for like a year or so now I've been really picky with what I favorite because it's become a playlist I go to that I know will cheer me up or are just videos I find very important. What kind was the last chip you ate? Uhhhh Lays, p sure. What is your favorite song to play on Guitar Hero or Rockband? I physically cannot play "Hotel California" by the Eagles without moving in some sort of way or singing.  The fucking solo ahhhhhhhhhh goosebumps every time.

[margot-bargot]

Listen, fam. I'm coming out.

Look, I've been working on the best way to do this for a while. I had a whole long thing typed up & I kept re-writing it for months. But I think I'm just gonna get to the point. I'm coming out. I identify as pansexual. What is pansexuality, you ask? Well, it basically means that I feel attraction to anyone, regardless of their gender. Cis men & women, trans men & women, agender folks, demigender folks, etc. If you've never heard of pansexuality before, lemme hit you with that Wikipedia link real quick to help you out: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pansexuality . Pansexuality is pretty adjacent to bisexuality & often gets confused for it. However, the two are slightly different in that bisexuality is attraction to two or more genders & pansexuality is attraction to anyone of any gender. A couple things to note real quick before we continue: 1. Pansexuality doesn't mean that you're attracted to EVERYONE you see. It simply means that your capacity to feel attraction isn't primarily based on gender. 2. If you make any jokes about having sex with pans, you're officially a cornball. I'm just giving you a heads up, is all. Sorry but I don't make the rules. So the thing you might be wondering is how I figured this out. To be honest, I'm still trying to figure out how I could go 29 years without knowing this about myself. But every time I think back, there is one element of my past that explains why it took so long. Growing up in a predominantly conservative christian home, the idea of being gay or anything close to it was a non-starter. It was a sin & a heavily condemned one, at that. As a result, any time a "gay thought" would pop up in my head, I tried to get it out of there as quick as possible. It became an instant reflex to keep that kind of thought out of my head. But I still would feel guilt for the thought, as well as guilt from "lusting" for women. My teens were a confusion time where I was discouraged from even considering an attraction for another gender while also being told I was TOO attracted to the "right" gender. Not a great situation, emotionally. Unfortunately, I suspect it's not an uncommon occurrence for kids growing up in strict christian homes. That said, I felt more comfortable exploring attraction & affection towards cisgendered women (even if it led to "sin" or whatever ugh) mainly because it was instilled in me by conservative christian culture that being gay was worse in the eyes of both God & the church congregation than sleeping with a woman before marriage. If you did that, the church congregation would murmur about you for a bit & engage in some form of slut-shaming hidden under the guise of "asking god for forgiveness." If you were gay? That was a disease. A sinful disease. You'd be quarantined, or ostracized, from that community unless they had the "grace" to help you get therapy to pray the gay away. So, being a massively horny but perpetually nervous teen, I chose to guiltily explore attraction to cis women & push everything else out. In college, my views on both religion & sexuality became more liberal. I no longer thought of being gay as a sin disease (although Sin Disease is a good name for a metal band, now that I think about it). This trend continued after college & beyond, to the point of total acceptance & support for the LGBTQIA community. Folks were gay (including several friends of mine) & that's cool. But I never thought about it for myself. I never allowed myself to really consider the possibility that I could be attracted to anyone else because I always struck the thought down when it popped up in my head. Even though I was no longer religious, I still carried that reflex I learned as a child years ago. The reflex that conservative Christianity taught & encouraged within me. I guess what I'm saying is that religious suppression is a powerful thing. And that only started to unravel for me late last year. I can't point to one thing that started the unraveling process because it really was a culmination of a bunch of different things (such as talking with some cool queer folks about their experiences & finally allowing myself to let in/process non-heteronormative thoughts). It was in late January where I first admitted out loud to one of my roommates that I was beginning to think that I wasn't actually straight. It was really hard for me to find the words for how I felt. None of the established labels (gay, bi, etc) felt 100 percent accurate for me. She actually helped point me toward the idea of pansexuality, which seemed closer to how I felt (I would later talk to some cool queer folks who helped verify some information about pansexuality, where it fit in the rainbow, etc). And a weird thing happened that night. I felt a weight lift off of me. It happened almost instantly. It was like a weight that I never knew was there. And I started crying. Was this what I was carrying with me for 29 years? Was that reflex to kick the idea of anything queer out of my head keeping this weight on me? Even now, with the large amounts of stress/worry that I feel on a day-to-day basis, I think about all of this & it feels like a bright spot in an otherwise dark world for me. Like, the world is going to shit, but I finally figured out this important truth about myself. Anyway, that's a lot of words up there. And I'm not done! I still need to tell you why I'm saying all of this! But I know this has been a long read, so feel free to run to the bathroom if you need to. It occurred to me that I might not be the only one in this situation. If conservative christian culture was able to burrow that repressive reflex that deep into me (so deep that it lasted years after I left the church), it had to do the same to other folks. Maybe there's someone reading this that hasn't even allowed themselves to consider their sexual identity. Maybe someone's reading that's just starting to ask some questions about their identity. If so, I want to tell you that it's okay to question & explore that side of yourself, even if you don't really have a name for it yet. I certainly didn't know what to call myself at first, other than "not straight". You're 100% not alone in this. I'm out here with you, grasping at bits of truth, filling in the gaps, & trying to find answers but feeling so much more free in the journey than I ever did in the comfort of what I knew. If you are in that situation, there are a lot of good resources to help you fill in the gaps & answer some of those lingering questions. If you have a friend in the LGBTQIA community, don't be afraid to ask them about their own experience. Talking with folks who had an experience coming to grips with their own queerness helped me quite a bit, even when our experiences were different. It's just nice to know you're not some unsolvable mystery & that this this thing (whatever you end up calling it) is a very positive thing. If you live in a big enough city, you probably have an equality center that provides resources, access to affordable counseling, support groups, & social events (where you can meet other folks within the community). If your city doesn't have something like that, there are online resources that can help as well. Here's a link for the GLBT National Help Center, in case you're in that situation: http://glbtnationalhelpcenter.org . Hopefully that ends up being helpful to anyone who needs it. It's 2018 & while there have been massive strides in LGBTQIA rights/visibility, there are still many ways in which members of the community are harmed & discriminated against (spearheaded largely by our current administration). We're not in a time where everyone everywhere can feel 100% safe openly exploring their sexual and/or gender identity. I'm a huge dummy in many respects, but if some of the information in this post helps someone feel less alone or points them in the right direction, then it'll be worth it. I realize that there are folks I know who hold more conservative views. They'll probably read all of this (or like, just the first two paragraphs lol) & decide I'm heading straight to hell. If they're being generous, they'll say that they're "praying for me" & pity me as another lost soul. Which, whatever. I'll be fine. If anything, I feel more free than I ever did repressing such a big part of myself. Plus, these are people who voted for Trump (& if they didn't, they are still largely okay with the gay-hating coward Mike Pence). So we're not gonna see eye-to-eye on this no matter what. 🤷‍♂️ Also they can fuck off. 🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️🤷‍♂️ I guess that's all I have to say. If you stuck around & read all of this, I appreciate you indulging me as I tried to fumble around explaining myself. It's been about 5 months since I first came out to my roommate & I'm happy to finally share the good news with y'all. I'm going to my first ever Pride parade soon. It'll be my first time around a large gathering of queer folk. I normally don't really like being out in large groups (nor do I love highly corporate-sponsored events, which this surely will be). That being said, I'm really excited! I seriously can't wait for this. Probably because it feels like finally being united with a group you never knew you were a part of. It's an event specifically celebrating the idea that it's cool & good to be queer, to be part of this rainbow. For the first time in a long time, it feels like I'm moving in the right direction.

[tiny-smallest]

choices

Rating: T Characters: Bendy, Alice, mention of various characters Warnings: there’s some light body horror with Alice’s ‘halo’ and the reference of lots of abuse and also murder Description: Bendy decides to invite Alice over for a talk. Predictably, it doesn't go well.

Also on AO3!

So I’ve fallen in love with @the-vampire-inside-me‘s Inkborne AU. I’m not very sure what a lot of the backstory is in it yet-- for example, whether or not Joey was abusive, whether or not he made Boris, Bendy, or Alice, or how quickly the Ink made the place decay, or... a timeline in general. But my brain sure wanted to find out, and it had the idea that this Bendy and Alice have a very strained relationship, and so this thing happened that assumes a looooooot of things about... everything I just mentioned. And explores why that relationship is strained. Trigger warning for talk about torture because boy howdy. Joey was. Yeah, he was a special kind of dick.

So anyway, have this drabble, otherwise titled “I write angst to deeply unfitting music.”

He sat under the tree high up on the manor grounds, staring out over the decaying city. Seemed like just a short time ago that the Ink took over. But his view of the passage of time had always been weird. Maybe it had something to do with being a demon. Yeah, that was probably it, right?

Man, it was a good thing Joey’s ancestor had decided that a regular plot of land wouldn’t do; he had to build the manor on an area built up on top of a cliff overlooking the town like a show-offy jackass. Whatever mess was going on below wouldn’t actually reach here, if ever, and thank god.

Now if only his grandstanding ancestor had built the manor on the taller mesa instead of the smaller one. So much would have been avoided if escape had been possible from this miserable town, but the sheer cliff of the taller mesa back beyond the manor grounds meant that there was no other way out. Why was this entire stupid town in what was basically a fucking bowl of land?

Ugh, this was not the mood he wanted to be in for this meeting. It was already going to suck enough without moping and fuming. Closing his eyes, he breathed in and out for a few minutes, but the sound of wings quickly drew them open.

Alice was here.

She landed several feet away from him, the delicate magic, threads of white sprouting from her back into some overly decorative wing design, slowly folding back up into her back from whence it came. She nodded a curt, polite greeting.

Bendy, however, was not much for politeness. “Surprised you came.”

Her mouth puckered into a frown as she lifted the veil covering her face. “You asked. I saw no problem with answering your request.”

“Why? Did they run out of praise for ya?” He didn’t even bother trying to hide the sullenness from his voice. So much for trying to start this off on neutral grounds.

“If you just drew me out here to insult me, I’ll leave.” She was having none of his shit today. When had she ever? Even back when what he’d had to say had been logical and reasonable, she hadn’t been interested in listening to him, oh no. He huffed, standing up and stretching the soreness from his muscles. Yeesh. He needed to stop falling asleep sitting up.

“Well? Why did you want to meet me?”

Yeah, being abrasive was seriously the wrong choice, but he’d made it. Whoops. “… I need yer help.”

“You have a funny way of asking for it.”

“Look, it’s been a rough-” Day? Week? Year? More like lifetime. Yeah, ‘lifetime’ sounded about right, but ‘week’ would be accurate, too. The dead horse he’d hauled back in chunks to the manor was all eaten now. He was back to eating squirrels. “-week.”

Deep breaths, Bendy. Because they worked so well last time. Augh.

“I wanna get outta this shithole. You can’t fly far but you got power; maybe you could help-”

“Absolutely not.”

Despite his preperations to hear that answer, a rock dropped into his stomach anyway. “Why the fuck not!? You’re strong! I’m strong!” Inexperienced despite his best attempts at not sucking, but strong! That counted for something, right? “The two of us together could ditch this place so fast our heads would spin! I don’ know what the world is like out there but god Alice, it’s gotta be better’n here!” Anywhere would be. Anywhere.

Her face softened. Shit, he must look more pathetic than he’d meant to look. “… I’d help. I really would. But it’s dangerous, significantly so. And I can’t risk my life when there are others depending on that life, much less actually leave the city with you.”

His face twisted into a scowl. This trash again? “They don’ own you, Al. You don’ owe them jack.”

“I can protect them. If I can do it, I should, and I can, so I choose to.” Her words, calm and deliberate, held a match to a boiling pit of gas in his belly.

“I don’ understand! Why are ya doing this!?” he exploded, gesturing furiously to the hellscape below, covered in ink and blood and dead things and nightmares, and in the center, the tower of a chapel, the only place untainted by the evil of the Ink… but very much tainted with the evil called humanity. “Why is this so important to ya!? Don’ you realize yer literally playin’ right into Joey’s hands, here!?”

Her eyes widened with something he couldn’t entirely place, but he guessed might be fear. The hand that rose halfway to her mouth didn’t help her case if she wanted to pretend that accusation didn’t freak her out. “What… what do you mean?”

“He did this to ya, Al! He did-” he gestured at the thing that could possibly be considered a halo nailed into Alice’s head “-that! God, Al, he tortured you same as either’a us! And yer gonna just- go along with yer ‘purpose’ after all that!? He made ya to clean up his mess, he fuckin’- nailed a thing into yer head so you could actually be equipped to clean up that mess, cause you ain’t a person, yer a tool to him! You know what he did to me! To Boris! You too! And yet yer jus’- gonna do what he wanted ya to do like a good little girl!? Like a goddamn chess piece!? He ain’t even here anymore! God knows where he fuckin’ slipped off to but there ain’t any ‘father’ to appease, Al!”

Her eyes, glazed during his tirade, cleared, and she didn’t so much fold her arms as she did hug herself, though her eyes remained on his. “Don’t misunderstand my intentions, Bendy. I don’t do what I do out of any love for Joey Drew. Or for his plans. This isn’t a seal of approval on anything he did to any of us, and I’m no puzzle piece of his, whatever he might think of all of this, if he’s even still alive somewhere.” Her eyes narrowed as she let go of herself, back straightening. “I do what I do because I want to. These people need protection, guidance, and healing. The city is overrun, has been for a long time now, and they’re scared. They need me and whether I like how I got these powers or not, I have them. I may as well use them.”

“Why you wanna do what they want any more than what Joey wants!?” The demon waved his hands in the air, as if he could swat away the ridiculousness of this like a fly. Or maybe he was just so full of emotion he needed to move. Probably some combination of the two. “Don’ you know that if they realized yer from the same origin point me and Boris are, they’d turn on ya!? Humans are fricking awful; I’d’ve thought you’d’ve figured that out when they tortured and murdered Boris! Jus’ leave ‘em to rot; they’d’a done the same to us in our shoes! Who cares what their issues are!? Who cares if they all die off!?”

Something inside the angel hardened a touch and she leveled a stare at him. Bendy, undeterred as per usual, put his hands on his hips and tapped his foot. “Just because our father never loved us,” Alice said, eyes like daggers, “doesn’t mean we can’t love the world.”

“Why should I!? It ain’t ever loved me!” The little demon returned her glare, hoping it drilled holes in her stupid head. “I know I ain’t owed the world, but I was owed more than what I got, Al, and you fuckin’ know it.” Tears were smudging her into a black and white blur, but there was no stopping this train now that they were on it. “I didn’ deserve the shit Joey did ta me, I didn’ deserve bein’ locked up in that tiny closet full’a crosses an’ left to puke my guts out, or any of the lashings, or the chains to hold me down durin’ those rituals ta ‘increase my power,’ or whatever bullshit that was, or ta have this plague pinned on me, or any of the rest of the shit I might be forgettin’ that Joey did ta me! And! They murdered Boris! Lemme repeat that again since you didn’ seem ta hear it, but they murdered Boris! He didn’ like fightin’, he never wanted ta hurt a soul and I don’ even think he was capable of it; all he did was leave the manor grounds, and when the same goddamn people you now protect in yer stupid church found out, they hunted him down like- like an animal and tortured him and murdered him! They put his body on fuckin’ display! I can see, jus’ barely but I can, his fuckin’ corpse from a few places in the manor, all cause a bunch of humans decided he didn’ deserve to live and the bullshit magic that brought us to life doesn’t allow bodies to decay or somethin’!”

“It hurt,” she whispered, rubbing at an eye. “It hurt finding out that he died. And like that. He didn’t deserve it, not ever. But I refuse to condemn an entire town full of people for the actions of some who I can’t even identify. I don’t know who killed him; I wouldn’t shelter them if I did know. I just know I didn’t kill him, and that if I could, I’d bring his murderers to justice. His death isn’t my fault.”

“You abandoned us!” Bendy shrieked, tears streaming openly now, hands in fists. “Boris is dead, Al! He’s fuckin’- he’s dead! He didn’t deserve none’a that! But it happened anyway, and if you’d been there maybe he woulda survived!” With each word, her features grew calmer and calmer, harder and harder to read, and the more they did, the hotter he felt inside, ready to slug her. “You abandoned us and he died!”

“… You might be projecting a little, there,” Alice said, her voice a smooth sort of cool that didn’t sit well in the demon’s stomach. “Maybe if I’d been there, maybe, he would be fine. But you were there. And you knew he was antsy, you knew he was tired of being cooped up in the manor, you knew all of that… but I know you, and I know you wouldn’t stop talking about how much you wanted to get out, either. I wasn’t there, but you were, and you didn’t keep a closer eye on him, or reel in your fantasy talk, or any other number of things to preempt the situation. At the end of the day, it’s ultimately the fault of the people who murdered him, but if either of us are to blame at all, Bendy, it’s you.”

The world felt frozen. The sun was still out, but everything was so cold. His stomach felt hollow, and not just because of his squirrel diet.

“I think you better leave,” he rasped.

“I think I should,” came the icy reply. Without another word, she drew her veil up and spread her magic wings, leaving the tiny demon staring at nothing in the wake of the gust of wind her wings created from takeoff.

His legs gave out and he collapsed into sobs hard enough to wrack his whole tiny, thin body.

So basically the idea regarding the background information for this is that Joey made all three of them, was a horrific piece of shit to them, but vanished one day after the Ink outbreak. Bendy’s mention of ‘father’ was a reference to an old conversation in once Joey mused aloud that technically speaking, as he made them, he could be considered their father. Running off the idea that crosses don’t kill Bendy in this, but direct contact will burn and being surrounded by them will leave him with severe headaches and stomachaches. They make him literally sick. Idea about the room of crosses being a punishment inflicted whenever Bendy misbehaved comes from this comic.

Bendy, unable to escape the city alone, continued his residence in the very same Drew Manor that he’s lived in his whole life and has wanted nothing more than to escape from, only because it’s the safest place in town due to its location. Headcanon is that he needs to eat but can eat stuff humans wouldn’t be able to, so he lives off of whatever he can catch in the manor grounds and, occasionally, the dead horses of travelers to the town that he takes apart and brings back to the manor.

Being trapped in the same place of years and years of abuse because it’s ironically become the only safe place in a living hell is a kind of hell in it of itself; starving on top of that makes it suck even more.

Alice, meanwhile, escaped the manor at an odd period of time where the Ink was starting to make its way into town but hadn’t become a full blown plague yet. Though she escaped Joey, her heartstrings were tugged by the frightened people and she took up residence in the chapel, which became a safe haven when the real outbreak hit. She became a leader to the remains of the town’s population, keeping the Ink at bay with her powers and healing those who needed it. Boris died shortly after Alice left and I think it’s pretty clear how and why.

[lordofthebigtimesupernatural]

i found your dad shiro au on ao3 and i love it!!!! how about lance getting a boyfriend and teen keith is jealous and vents to shiro about it? bonus if it's also lance lowkey coming out as bi/pan but since keith is jealous he thinks keith doesn't like him not being straight. ily and your work and if i could i'd give you a hug so virtual hug *hugs*

Hello there! Aren’t you the nicest person ever? How sweet of you! Thank you so much! I hope you like this one, it was fun to do! It’s not as shippy as you guys probably want but I’m not good with that, especially this AU. But still, I hope you like it because we’ve all been there at some point! I love any sort of hug, so lemme give you a big old virtual hug too *hugs*. Also thank you so much for the fan art of scratchy dad Shiro and his baby! It was so freaking cute!! I hope you enjoy! OMG guys, this is the 50th one-shot for the Single Dad AU! Wow, this AU has come so far and I am so thrilled to have written 50 one-shots based on asks and ideas, and here is to 50 more! Whoo-hoo!

x.V.x

              WhenLance introduced Keith and his friends to Lance’s boyfriend it threw everyone to a loop. Considering how manygirls Lance had chased throughout his years in school with his crushes and lovelife. He’d never mentioned an interest in other boys before until everyone gotto meet Lance’s new boyfriend. Whom had been apparently dating Lance for alittle over five weeks now.

              However,everyone took it with smiles and acceptance and soon the boy, Leo, was acceptedinto their group of friends. Hunk and Leo got along with talk about engineeringand plans to build a machine that could improve the speed and power of bicyclesthat was ecofriendly. Pidge enjoyed Leo’s enthusiasm for science and spaceexploration and he apparently knew Matt well. Lance’s family all adored the boyand even Shiro enjoyed talking to the boy when he started to give him a ride toLance’s house after school, about where they both have traveled in the world.

              It was asurprise when Lance had explained that he was bisexual, meaning he was interestedin both sexes and not just one or the other. Lance was more attracted to womenin general, but he still had an attraction to boys like Leo.

              “I wouldmarry a lady or a dude.” Lance had shrugged when Pidge inquired further. “I cansee myself settling down with either. I like ladies more so but I also like theguys too.”

              Everyonecould tell that Lance was nervous in his comingout, and they were quick to hug and accept their friend as they always had.Everyone, Keith included, made sure Lance didn’t ever feel insecure or hesitantabout his sexuality after coming out, which eventually led to them meeting Leo.Who was a ball of sunshine.

              Everyonewas enjoying Leo. Everyone except Keith.

              AndKeith didn’t understand why.

              Leo wasnice and never said a mean word to Keith. He knew that Keith was autistic andhad even asked about Keith’s stims because his younger brother was justrecently diagnosed as autistic. Leo laughed at everyone’s jokes, even Keith’sstupid ones and playfully bit back at Keith when he got angry. Even Red likedLeo.

              So why on Earth did Keith always get angrywhen Leo was around?

              Duringlunch, one Saturday, Keith decided to get to the bottom of things andconfronted his dad with his concerns. Thankfully, Shiro was quiet and respectfulas he let his son vent out his frustrations and misunderstandings. He didn’tinterrupt once and waited until Keith was finished before adding his thoughtsconcerning the incident.

              “Andhe’s super nice. But whenever we give him and Lance a ride home I get so angryand don’t want to talk to either of them. And then Lance is all mushy, goo-gooeyes about Leo even when Leo isn’t there.” Keith huffed and angrily stabbed hisgrilled cheese with a fork. Shiro hid a smile behind his lunch and nodded.“Plus, Lance spends a lot more time with Leo and not us. Or he always has to invite Leo when we hangout, but Leo’s a good guy and he’s really nice.”

              “He is.”Shiro nodded in agreement.

              “See!Even you like Leo! So why would I get angry every time that he’s around.” Keithslumped back into his seat feeling dejected. Taking pity on the poor, confusedboy, Shiro decided to intervene and add his thoughts to the situation.

              “Well,have you ever considered that maybe you’re not always angry when he’s aroundbut when he’s around Lance?” Shiroasked and Keith frowned. The teen was silent and considered his dad’swords.  True. I don’t get mad when it’s just Leo around.

              “Butwhy?”

              “Well,maybe you’re not really mad at all and it’s not that you don’t like Leo.” Shirosuggested quietly, causing Keith to groan. Sometimes he wished that his dadwould just spit it out right away and stop speaking in riddles all the time. Itcould be frustrating to Keith, who had a hard-enough time with socialsituations and reading people’s emotions.

              “Dad,please.”

              “What Imean is,” Shiro chuckled softly. “I think you might be jealous of Leo.”

              Keith’sjaw dropped this time. “What?! Why would I be jealous?!” Keith cried out,recoiling as if Shiro had burned him. Shiro snickered and bit into his lunchbefore answering while Keith continued to huff in denial.

              “I don’tknow. You’ll have to figure that out on your own. Maybe you just don’t like oneof your friends hanging out with someone new? I mean it’s been you, Hunk andPidge for almost ten years now and suddenly a new kid is entering your groupand taking all of Lance’s time. Lance is one of your closest friends and I knowhow hard it can be for you to let someone new in.”

              Keithcontinued to pout and didn’t make a move to correct his dad or speak up.However, his dad’s words had more of an impact on Keith than he liked to admit.They were starting to make sense the more that Keith thought about them. What if dad was right? What if I really amjealous? Does that make me a bad friend?

              “Am I abad friend, then? If I am jealous?” Keith finally asked. Shiro swallowed at howtiny and scared Keith’s voice soundedin that instant. Keith had a hard time making friends and having Hunk, Pidgeand Lance from an early age was one of the greatest parts of Keith’s life.Shiro knew that Keith was insecure about his inability to make friends andalways worried that Lance, Hunk or Pidge would grow tired of him and leave himbehind.

              “Oh no.Keith. Do you ever do anything to Leo?” Shiro asked softly and pushed his lunchaway. Keith picked at a spot on the table and sighed. Then he shook his head.

              “Are youever mean to Leo? Or anyone else?” Another shake of the head.

              “Do youever do anything to stop Lance and Leo from hanging out?” A shake of the head.

              “Do youfeel the need to forcefully break up Leo and Lance?” There was a slighthesitant before a firm shake of Keith’s head. Shiro smiled and ran gentlefingers through Keith’s hair, and Keith leaned into them like a cat. “Then you’renot a bad friend. It’s okay to feel jealous, especially if you’re scared. Justtry to remember that Lance isn’t going anywhere and neither is Hunk or Pidge. Plushaving another friend could be nice.”Shiro said while Keith sighed and smiled against his dad’s touch. His dadalways had a way with calming him down and knew what to do.

              Keithjust hoped that his dad was right and this was all it was.

x.V.x

              Keithwas avoiding him.

              Thatmuch Lance knew.

              AnytimeLance tried to just hang out with Keith or Leo and Keith, Keith would haveplans or keep quiet without looking at Lance. Sometimes he would talk to Leobut most often he kept quiet. Leo had taken it with a good heart – bless hislittle soul – and told Lance that some people preferred space and that wasokay. But Lance knew this was strange for Keith. It was not normal behavior forhim.

              At firstLance thought that maybe Keith had a crush on Leo and his head had almostexploded. However, that thought quickly was torn down when Keith had called Leoan acquaintance instead of friend.

              “It’s a step up from just Leo. Isn’t thatcool? I think he’s starting to warm up to me like Lance and Pidge!” Leo hadlaughed excitedly and Lance soon relaxed.

              But ifKeith didn’t have an awkward crush on Leo then why would he be avoiding Lance?That was when a dark thought came to Lance’s mind. One that made him sick tohis stomach and bit his nails down to the nub in worry.

              What if Keith was freaked out that I wasn’tstraight?

              Lancehad always considered he and his friends to be very open minded, even Keith.However, none of them had ever discussed sexuality or gender or even dating withone another until Lance’s coming out as a bisexual. Of course, no one wassurprised when Pidge made an announcement that they were nonbinary a few yearsback, but that had been obvious when Pidge had preferred to be called them/theysince elementary school.

              Would Keith really be bothered if I wasn’tstraight? What if he’s freaked out? Lance bit his lip. He didn’t want tothink that to be a possibility and a part of him was saying that Keith would never act this way, but anotherteeny-tiny part of him was the irrational part that was freaking out over Keithnot accepting him. After all, Keith was his second best-friend. How could Lanceaccept himself if one of his best friends couldn’t accept him? Wasn’t it codethat a best friend was supposed to love and accept you, no matter what? Unlessyou like, commit murder?

              Being bisexualwasn’t even close to murder.

              So whywouldn’t Keith accept him.

              Leo wasn’tmaking matters any better. In fact, he had giggled at Lance and gave him asmall kiss on the cheek for his worries.

              “Come onnow. I may not have known your friends long, but I know Keith would never think that.” He laughed and continued withtheir lunch as they waited for the others to join them. Lance pouted andaccepted Leo’s fingers running through his hair as an apology for laughing.Which was house the others found them and Keith felt his stomach twist.

              He satdown with Hunk and Pidge and the group sat in silence. Keith and Lance wereboth avoiding each other’s gazes and everyone could feel the tension in theair. Eventually, Leo sighed and put his lunch down.

              “Keith,”He said, catching Keith’s full attention. “Lance, here, seems to think that youare upset by the fact that he’s bisexual.” Lance stared at his boyfriend inhorror while Keith’s jaw dropped. Then he quickly fumed and slapped Lance’sarm.

              “Hey!”

              “Howcould you think that?!” Keith demanded with an irritated huff. Lance blinkedowlishly and Keith sighed. “I could neverhate you or be disgusted with you. Especially because of your sexualorientation! That’s absurd. That’s like you saying that you’re upset that I’mautistic!”

              “I wouldnever think that!” Lance shot back and Keith scowled.

              “Thenwhy would you think that low of me?” Keith’s voice almost cracked with hurt andLance felt himself filling with guilt. His entire body deflated and Keithsighed. “Lance, you’re one of my closest friends ever. I’m really lucky to haveyou and the others. I could never be upset with you. You’re bisexual and that’sgreat. I’m happy that you’re comfortable with yourself to tell us.”

              “Keith,I’m sorry.” Lance twisted his hands nervously and Keith swallowed. “You’ve justkinda been ignoring me, and I guess I thought the worse. That was wrong of me.”

              “It’sokay. I have been a bit of a jerk.” Keith chuckled and everyone laughedquietly. “I guess I was just jealous of Leo.”

              Thistime it was Leo’s turn to blink in surprise and Lance frowned. Keith swallowedthickly before continuing. “I’ve only ever had 3 friends in my life and I knowI won’t make a lot more friends. I’m lucky enough to have you, Pidge and Hunk in my life. When Leo came alongand took all your attention, I was afraid you’d forget about me and think Ireally was the weird kid all along.” Keith shrugged, staring down at his worn-outshoes.

              “Keith…”

              “It’ssilly but I just, I’m always afraid I’m going to lose you guys. You mean a lotto me, Lance.” Keith admitted quietly. Lance gaped from where he was until Leonudged him harshly. Lance eyed his boyfriend who was pointing at Keith andshifting his eyes.

              “Keith,hey buddy, no one is ever going toreplace you.” Lance said softly and pulled Keith’s chin up so he was looking athim. “You’re our Keith and you will alwaysbe our friend. You have been for ten years and for another ten thousand youwill be.”

              Keithsnorted, but the smile on his face was genuine and remained. “We won’t livethat long.”

              “Keith.”Leo said quietly. “I’m sorry if I made you feel jealous. I don’t want to upsetyou, and I’ve come to enjoy your company as a friend. If you’d like, you canhave four friends now?”

              Keithwas genuinely surprised by Leo’s comment and only found his smile growing. “Yeah.I’d like that.” He almost grinned again at the blinding beam that Leo sent hisway, and this time when Leo kissed Lance’s cheek Keith’s stomach didn’t twistpainfully.

              “Besides,”Leo grinned cheekily. “I don’t think anyone can bond as much as you and Lancehave.”

[multi-fan-dom-madness]

JaxCon 2017

Wow. Just wow. I’ve not stopped internally screaming since I stepped foot in the hotel where the convention was being held. That feat becomes much more ridiculous the further away from JaxCon we get, but then again, I’m always screaming about something. So, without further ado, here’s how JaxCon 2017 went down in the eyes of a first-time conventioner. (Sidenote: what even is the term for a person who attends a convention? Is there a term? Because there should be if there isn’t already.) (Another sidenote: I have literally 13 other videos, one of which is Matt and Rob doing imitations, which is always hilarious, so if you want those just lemme know. Now keep reading :P )

THURSDAY

I went to this convention with my mom. It had been a high school graduation present for me last June, so for months and months I’d been dreaming about what it would be like, what would happen, who I’d meet, what I’d say. I can confidently say that no amount of daydreaming (or even dreaming in general) can prepare one for the atmosphere and the pace of a convention. We rolled into Jacksonville around 8 o’clock, but by some cruel twist of fate, we did not end up eating dinner until after midnight. Thank Chuck god for early registration. I went to bed after reading a mind-numbing 30+ pages of my Colonial America history textbook. Yay me.

FRIDAY

We were up early, on account of my need to take care of some homework before the weekend’s shenanigans got underway. But as soon as work was finished, we were ready to roll and boy, did things roll. After a quick exploration of the vendor hall, I made the spur-of-the-moment decision to buy photo ops with Rob and Richard (separate). My mom looked surprised, I guess because after all my antics about how much I love Lucifer, I went with God. Anyways.

As much as I love J2, I can proudly say that Rob and Richard made my top 5 favorite things of the con. Aside from being utterly adorable awesome, the men are geniuses. I mean, who else stands in front of a full convention hall and declares, “We love KoC!” (And if you don’t know how to pronounce it for whatever reason, it sounds exactly the way it looks.) Friday would also begin the weekend-long trend of referencing “lumbersexuality,” as well as the entire cast’s undivided support and admiration of the Women’s Marches occurring all over the country.

First panel of the day was the lovely Alaina Huffman (Abaddon). She’s so pretty!!! And funny!!! And amazing!!! Unfortunately, none of my photos of her came out any kind of decent, which really sucks, because she is really beautiful. She talked about her background in modeling and how she became an actress. But by far my favorite quote from her was:

“You guys write porn about us. It’s weird.”

Apparently she had either been sent or had found (I forget which) a fic in which Abaddon was with Dean, who was wearing a very nice pair of pink panties. Props to whoever wrote that.

Next up was Death himself, Julian Richings. Apparently none of my photos of him turned out decent, either. Regardless, I think the best part about his panel was his uncanny ability to sound like either Ron or Harry from Potter Puppet Pals depending on how he was talking. In his “I’m from England and this American stuff is all new to me!” bit, he sounds like Ron. When discussing why he gets cast as the “bad guy” in certain productions, he is able to imitate Harry as he lists the two things necessary for a villain: cheekbones and an accent.

He also told his concussion story, which apparently had kept Rich up the night before. I don’t have video of it, but if you can find it, it’s pretty hilarious. Long story short, he was running to catch a bus/trolley/some form of public transportation when he ran headfirst into one of those clear bus stop walls, knocking him over backwards. Forehead bleeding, concussed, a knot the size of an egg where he hit the glass. He’s a crazy old guy, but he’s got great energy. I admire that.

Jason Manns. Unf. What can I say about Jason Manns other than he was unexpectedly and wholly attractive and so sweet. He’s honestly such a nice guy. He told us how he tried using his Apple Watch to scan his airplane tickets. Someone said he was being hipster. He replied, “It would be hipster if I did it right. It was much more dad the way I did it.” Basically, he was trying to scan a ticket at the wrong gate, holding up a line of people, and only after about five minutes of confusion the airport people realized what was going on.

Someone asked him something about how he gets his lyrics/writing to be the way he wants them. The two things he said that stood out to me were:

“Art is not perfect.”

&

“Not trying to be perfect is the way to get it closest to perfect.”

Simple advice, really. Hard to put into practice, though.

He sang “Stand by Me” and then the question right after that was about what song he thought fit his life, and he said, “I wish you would’ve asked that before I played that song, but um, I’d like to think that Stand by Me would be that song for me.”

I got to ask him a question!!! Excitement!!! Here’s the gist of what happened: I asked what it was like working with Jared and Misha on the Christmas album a few years back. Jason explains that he enjoys collaborating with a lot of people and makes the point that those two are some of the busiest guys you’ll ever meet, so he had about two hours to record their songs. Ends with, “Somewhere in that long rambling attempt, did I answer your question?” Cutie. (I’d embed the video but Tumblr only allows for 5 videos. Sigh.)

He also sang two songs with Rob, but for whatever reason only one of the videos actually works, and it’s the better of the two songs anyways (in my opinion, at least), so enjoy that:

Oh, and as a follow-up type question to mine, someone else asked about the Christmas album as well. They wanted to know why he chose to switch the traditional gender roles in “Baby, It’s Cold Outside.” His answer?

“I think we can all agree it’s kind of a rape-y song.”

He also wanted to recreate the original scene that that song was choreographed to, but it never happened. There’s always hope, though!

Last came Gabe Tigerman, who was filling the space that Emily Swallow was supposed to be in. (Kinda bummed she didn’t get to make it, but hey, Gabe was hilarious so I guess it worked out alright.) He got asked if he would ever go on a ghost hunt with Chad Lindberg. He rejected the idea right away, because Chad is always talking about how he got scratched by like, a demon, “but it’s fun! You should come!” or how something followed Chad home, “but you should come!” Gabe was like, 

“I don’t like ghosts, and maybe that’s close-minded of me.”

On the subject of Chad - someone asked Gabe what he thought his character Andy’s personal heaven would be like. He started out describing a very Scooby-Doo-esque scenario in which Ash and Andy would just drive around heaven, and then it turned into a discussion of a fanfic he’d seen involving Ash and Andy (or Chad and Gabe, I don’t remember which to be honest). After about five minutes of recounting this fanfic experience, he stops and goes, “I just learned a lot about myself, wow.”

He also recounted his college road trip for us, which was one of the funniest stories I’ve heard in a while. If you haven’t heard it, go look it up. It’s about the world’s largest groundhog (which turned out to be the world’s largest groundhog statue) and the world’s only 5- and 6-legged cows. Seriously. Just YouTube it. I’m cracking up writing about it.

And that was it for Friday’s panels. But there were autograph signings by Richard, Gabe, Alaina, and Julian and we did those. Since they were pretty much on schedule that day, we got to have our autographs personalized. My name is kind of a weird one - Rhiannon - and at first I was only going to have them put “Rhi” simply because it’s easier to write, easier to spell, etc. But I changed my mind and put my full name.

Richard looked at it, started writing it, and when he got to the second “n” he freezes and goes, “Wait. Did I do that right? That’s a lot of n’s.” 

PSA: If you have not yet noticed, Rich has some of the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen, and that’s saying something because I’ve also seen Jensen’s eyes up close. Fuck, man. Sunlight through whiskey, indeed.

Anyways. Gabe looked at my name and held up a finger as he spelled it out. “R-H-I-A-N-N-O-N. Is that right?” The volunteer at the table asked my mom, who was behind me, where she wanted him to sign her thing. She said he could sign it wherever - hell, he could draw a flower for all she cared. He looked up and grinned and said, “Oh, you’re getting a flower.” And he drew one for her. 

Alaina didn’t even blink at my name, just wrote it out like she did it every day. She told us that her kids all have unique names, and that it was because of her ex-husband, but she was like, “Really, you want to give our kids weird names? Okay, John.” She’s so cute, I love her.

Julian looked at it and asked, “Is it Welsh?” My mom and I both answered that it was and he asked what it meant. My mom said something about how it means goddess, water nymph, witch - and that I embody every single one of those. (I’m flipping my hair right now. Bow before me, peasants, I am your goddess.)

After that we had a bit of a break, so we ate dinner and then sat around for like an hour and a half before the karaoke party started. Once it started, it was great. We had Matt Cohen and Rich dressed up quite hilariously-

And if you haven’t heard about it yet, this is where Matt’s moose knuckle comes into play.

His mustache kept falling off and he had glue running into his mouth, poor dude. He and Rich were great, though. They made all the karaoke participants run in front of the stage whenever there was an instrumental break in their song. They were joined by all the people who had panels that day, as well as Rob, Jason Manns, and his college buddy Hayden Lee. Look at these precious friends.

Somewhere in the midst of practically screaming the words to all the songs, I realized I had a much bigger crush on Rob than I originally thought. It was one of those odd moments where you can feel yourself slipping down the slope of “oh god they’re really great I love them” and I’m still sliding down that incline. I’ve had like five Louden Swain songs stuck in my head for the past couple days, send help.

Anyways. Somehow the people singing karaoke went from nice classic rock to Toxic and Hollaback Girl and shit like that. It was weird. But a good time.

SATURDAY

Explored the vendor hall some more after we had breakfast. I found this shirt-

which I thought was great. Should’ve got it - I was a Friday person - but I didn’t. Oh well. Next time. After the vendor hall we had to go sit in the ballroom for the opening bit by Rob and Rich. They talked a little about the Women’s Marches going on all across the country, but veered off course when Rich missed the second “r” in Rob’s name, calling him “Robbit.” (Rob replied by calling Rich “Richad.”) One of them mentioned the similarity to The Hobbit. They called the Shire “the Squire” and “Hobbitville” and said,

“We’re not the tallest guys but we are the tallest Hobbits.”

One of them (I think Rob? Correct me if I’m wrong) spoke as a Hobbit in a high voice. Rich was like, 

“In the new Trump America, Hobbits have high voices.”

They talked about deporting all the Hobbits in the country, building a wall around the Squire, etc. And then somehow the topic moved onto Rich’s ice cream van. If you can find a video of this, please please PLEASE watch it. Funny shit. My favorite interaction to come out of it, though, was:

Rich: I do have a van.

Rob: Don’t...don’t get in Richard’s van.

Rich continued the trend of calling Rob “Bobbo” which I will never ever let go of. If I ever get around to writing all the Rob fic ideas I have now, he’s being called “Bobbo” at least once in all of them. Sorry not sorry.

I don’t really remember much else from their introduction on Saturday except Rich proclaiming,

“We are all parishioners in the High Church of the Holy Dick!”

To which I had to “woot!” in agreement because, I mean, c’mon. I’m totally a part of that now.

Jim Beaver was the first panel of Saturday morning. According to him, the elixir of life is Dr. Pepper, which I wholeheartedly second. Early on, he was asked a question pertaining to what he was recognized most for, Bobby or some other character. He said,

“A lot of people recognize me from prison.”

And when everyone laughed:

“I used to do outreach programs, what did you think I meant?”

He was asked how he prepared for the scene where Bobby dies, and he said, “I just...pretended I was dying.” He also said that during that entire scene, Jared was twisting his toes so it was a bit difficult to act like he was dying when that was happening. Towards the end of his panel, someone asked him what he would rename vampires. His answer:

“What’s wrong with callin’ them vampires? ... Toothy fang buddies.”

So now that we have a new name for vampires, I expect you all to adjust your lives accordingly. Petition for Twilight to be remade specifically for the purpose of replacing every instance of the word “vampire” with “toothy fang buddy.” (I’m laughing at my own idea, but just imagine: “Say it. Out loud.” “A toothy fang buddy.” Dear god I crack myself up.)

After Jim, it was Mark Pellegrino. Though his entire panel was extremely entertaining, the only things I wrote down had to do with what Lucifer did in the cage with Sam, Adam, and Michael as well as pre-release. To the first one, Mark said that the last time he answered that question, he’d been attacked on Twitter for merely suggesting that they were all getting it on, basically. So he changed his answer to, “A perennial game of strip poker.” (Someone write the fic.) In answer to what Lucifer did before he was freed from the cage, he said,

“Whatever he was doing with the others, he did with himself. Take that however you want.”

Somewhere in the panel, someone asked him how they could go about showing that they were a Supernatural fan without looking like a Satanist. Mark basically told the person to think about what other people think and say, “Fuck ’em.” Middle fingers all the way. Who cares what they think? Solid advice.

After Mark went off-stage, there was a bit of a break during which Rob was signing some things and the Misha photo op was going on. I had that photo op, and it was my first one, and I honestly don’t remember much about it, but here’s what I do remember.

I remember going upstairs to the room where they had the photos set up. As soon as I saw Misha, that was it, I started freaking out almost as bad as the girl in front of me. But the closer I got, the more I calmed down, mostly because he’s really tall and I was so focused on that I forgot why I was nervous. Like, I’ve seen posts about how he’s actually a normal-sized human being but damn, you don’t realize just how tall he really is until you’re about 10 feet away from him, starstruck.

When it was my turn, I just kinda forced the words out past the residual nerves and asked, “Can we do back-to-back with our arms crossed?” He gave a little nod and that was that. I looked up at him right after and thanked him. (My internal monologue at this point was something like: “holy shit this is Misha Collins his eyes are sO BLUE WHAT THE FUCK.”) As soon as I walked away I started crying, but I calmed down pretty quickly. Here’s how that op turned out:

Right after that, we had to go back downstairs for Mark Sheppard’s panel. I knew going into it that he has the tendency to make fun of the people asking the questions, but my mom did not know and so the first person he messed with she looked at me like, “What the hell???” But Crowley is one of her favorites and she soon was in tears laughing so hard. Just some quick interactions:

Fan: What’s it like being the King of Hell? Mark: I don’t know, I’m an actor who plays him.

A fan in the crowd hands him a rose. Mark: *to the fan asking a question* Yeah, I got a rose, you can go home now.

A fan dressed as Castiel is asking a question. Mark interrupts to ask who they’re dressed as.  "Um ... Castiel?” “Who’s she?”

A fan has their question written on their phone. Mark looks at it and says, “Will Crowley ever be the King of Hell aga- go away.”

After a fan calls him pretty: “I haven’t been called pretty in a long time. But it’s nice, and I appreciate it.”

He also stopped to play with probably every baby in the room. He’s such a dad, it’s so cute. 

After that was another break, so we were going to eat lunch, but as we were walking through the vendor hall, Louden Swain came out to their table to do a quick acoustic performance. Jason Manns and Hayden Lee joined them. We got lucky; we were able to be at the front of the crowd, close to the table, so that was super cool. In order, the songs are called “Night Light,” “Revolution,” and “Stowaway.” Here’s the full performance:

Afterwards we were also lucky enough to catch Jason and he was kind enough to take a quick photo. Like I said, real sweet guy. Also very big and I mean that in the best way because he made me feel small and I could get used to that. I did get used to that, actually, by the end of the con. I’m 5′2″, I can’t really feel anything but small. But anyways, Jason was great and he’s adorable. 

Not long after that was my photo op with Rob. He’s such a cutie oh my dear lord. I was one of the first maybe 20 or 30 to take a photo with him. When it was my turn, I asked, “Can you hug me from behind?” He was like, “Yeah!” (So cute, ugh.) After, I turned and thanked him and he said, “Thank you.” Maybe had a hand on my back/shoulder? I don’t remember. I was freaking out too much. He’s seriously attractive and I still can’t handle it.

Next was the panel with Rob, Rich, and Matt. Very first question was about the train story, so we got a super abridged version of that. Someone else asked if they could do their impressions of each other.

My favorite part of their panel was when Rob was asked what he would do to Rich and Matt if he had God’s powers for a day. Someone suggested making them make-out. Rob laughed and then gave his answer. I didn’t get the full quote, but this is basically the gist of it:

“I’d make Rich my go-get-me guy. You know, like, I left my bag in my room, go get me it. ... And Matt, Matt would be my body guard. ... And then I’d make them make-out.”

Rob was also asked how God would come back to the show. He said, “Sam or Dean would be praying, and I’d just walk around the corner, eating a bowl of cereal in my boxer shorts. ‘You called?’”

Look at these cuties.

Misha was the last panel on Saturday.

I didn’t realize until making this post that Misha’s feet are off the ground. Dorks. Anyways, the four big things I remember from him are:

House lights come up. Misha looks out at the audience and says, “Wow, this is almost as many people as were at Trump’s inauguration.”

A man asked a question but started with, “She said she’d hit me if I didn’t come ask you this.” Misha went on to interrogate the man about his marriage to this “she” only to find out that the woman in question was the man’s daughter. Misha’s face was priceless.

He was asked which bad habit of his he didn’t want his kids to inherit. He went on a rant about technology, and as soon as he finished, his phone rang. It was his mother-in-law, but when he called her back she said she hadn’t tried to call. She was so cute to listen to.

Someone asked about his internship at the White House. He said he expected it to be much more political, but they had him licking stamps all day. He told us, “I remember thinking, ‘This isn’t fun, I don’t like licking stamps’ - which is not entirely true. They’re kinda tasty.”

Me too, Misha, me too.

After that was my photo op with Rich. I was a little less nervous for this one than the previous two, but I mean it’s Richard Speight, Jr. of course I was excited. I got up to him and said, “Hi!” He said, “Hi, how ya doing?” to which I replied, “Good! Can you hug me from behind?” (I’m so original, I know.) He was like, “I sure can!” And like the other two, I thanked him afterward and he said thank you as well, one hand on my back. Squee!

As soon as that was done, we headed back downstairs for the next round of autographs: Mark Sheppard, Matt, Misha, and Mark Pellegrino. These went quick, because they were running a little behind schedule, so no personalization on these, sadly., except from Pellegrino Mark Sheppard asked me if I was having fun, to which I replied, “Yes! Very much fun.” There’s that wonderful English I was talking about earlier. Matt said he was going to take his two year-old to Disney Land in Cali. Misha didn’t say anything. Straight faced the entire time. Was a little unsettling. But I suppose that’s Misha. Mark Pellegrino was super nice. The woman in front of me shared a name with his mother, and my mom was like, “I bet no one in your family has her name” (”her” meaning mine). He kinda laughed and said, “Nope.” He wrote “Love you!” on it but at first I thought it was “fuck you!” and honestly I would’ve been happy either way.

We finally ate dinner. And then it was the Saturday Night Special with Louden Swain. We all got kazoos and glow sticks! We also raised over $5,000 just in the ballroom alone, for a total of more than $70,000 overall. It was nuts. When Misha announced it towards the end of the show, he got quiet and went, “Holy shit.” The show itself was amazing. I’m just going to put a few of the videos, but know that they also sang “No Time Like the Present,” “Whipping Post,” “Fare Thee Well,” “Wagon Wheel,” “Juliet,” “Amazing,” and some others (not in that order but you get the idea). The only thing I will say is that between songs, someone yelled that Rob gives good hugs. He asked, “What was the question? Free hugs?” The fan repeated their statement and Rob grinned really big and said, “Oh! Thank you. I- I like to give hugs.” Could he be any friggin’ cuter? (The answer is yes. So much yes.)

Superman - Rob and Rich

She Waits - such raw emotion from Rob. He’s a beautiful singer. Fuck. (Sidenote: after this song he got really quiet and got that 50-yard stare and I just. I love him. Precious man.)

Medicated - ft. the best kazoo solo ever (please listen to all the comments Rob makes because they’re hilarious. And so are Rich and Pellegrino trying to smoke their kazoos. This is also where the “Goddammit I love you” comes from.)

And that was the end of our Saturday night! Well, sort of. I'm pretty sure when we got back to our room I went and read some fanfiction, and my mom was like, “What are you reading?” After a long pause, I answered, “Fanfiction.” I read a bit more and then my mom told me to go to bed and said something about it being weird that I was reading porn in the same room as her. I believe her exact words were, “That’s kind of fucked up.” In my defense, only one of the five quick fics I read were porn, as she put it.

SUNDAY

First thing Sunday morning was the J2 Gold Panel. And yes this is when Jensen was asked the Destiel question, I don’t wanna talk about it, don’t ask me about it, just stop with it. It happened, now move on.

Jensen said that on set, whenever Jared doesn’t want to laugh out loud, he just hums. Straight up hums.

Someone asked them what Jared and Jensen would tell Sam and Dean and what Sam and Dean would tell Jared and Jensen. Jared replied, “As Jared, I’d tell Sam that there’s probably some demons in Hawaii. And as Sam, I’d tell Jared to watch out for Ruby.” Jensen answered, “As Dean, I’d tell Jensen to enjoy his blissful domestic life. As Jensen, I’d tell Dean to oil the freakin’ hinges on the car doors.”

I think after that was the Jensen photo op. I was shaking before I even got in line for it. As soon as I got in the room and saw him I started to tear up, but I held it together. About 60 seconds before it was my turn I decided I was just going to hug him - and I planned to say that - but once I stepped up next to him all I managed was, “Hi!” Damn his hair. Damn his height. Damn his eyes which were more hazel than green thanks to the shirt he wore. Just damn him. I don’t remember much except he was warm. I don’t even remember if I said thank you. As soon as I walked away, that was it, I started sobbing. Full on sobbing, with big fat tears and everything. Cried for probably half an hour, not gonna lie. He’s a beautiful human being.

lOOK AT HIS TONGUE THOUGH OMG.

Once I calmed down, I redid my make-up and then we walked the vendor hall one more time so I could get a Louden Swain t-shirt (and also bought their new album, No Time Like the Present - go listen to it, it’s great). Not long after that was my photo op with Jared. I was less nervous for this one - must have gotten it out of my system after Jensen. Jared was so cute. And so, so, so very tall. When it was my turn I asked him, “Can you use me as an armrest, for the height difference?” He was like, “Yeah!” I managed to sneak in a quick hug right after and good GOD his back muscles, you guys. So firm, so defined. Anywho, this was my favorite op of the weekend.

He’s so tall that his knee is bent even with his arm on my head. Amazing.

Right after that we ran back downstairs for the Louden Swain autograph signing and I talked to Rob!!! He’s so cute!!! No hesitation, I said, “I’m writing a story about you for my creative writing class.” He said, “Oh really?” and I was like, “Well, not you, more like God, but same difference, right?” My mom jumped in with, “She’s meeting you in an elevator.” I stepped to the side at this point as he had passed along the CD they were all signing, didn’t catch what he said (or even realize he said something until I noticed he was still looking at me). “Pardon?” I asked. He said, “That’s a good idea. Good luck!” and wINKED and I still haven’t come back to life from that yet. I’m a ghost now. He’s so goddamn pretty. Such blue eyes and a cute smile and I just. *buries face in hands*

Anyways. Jim Beaver had a Sunday panel. Here’s some of what stuck with me:

“I write pretty well when I get around to writing.”

(on kissing Mark Sheppard) “...it was like kissing a dirt sandwich with stubble. No, it was the most romantic day of my life. ... I don’t lose as much sleep over it as Mark Sheppard does. I’m not as needy as he is.”

“You’re asking me to be creative up here, which is more than I’m willing to do.”

(after answering about a Bobby and Rufus spin-off) “You guys would be there for an episode about a can of corn that was in an episode.”

“I really hate to disagree with the current administration, but there is actually a thing such as facts.”

After Jim, it was Jared and Jensen’s main panel. 

Honestly the main things that stuck with me from this were that “Pudding!” was written as Sam's line, and that the grenade launcher scene wasn’t scripted. 

Oh, and we sang Happy Birthday to Clif after the last question.

Mark Sheppard’s Sunday panel was the last thing before autograph signings. I was working on homework for most of this panel (and by homework I mean my God story), so the only things I caught were:

“Lumbersexual? Sounds like a back issue.”

&

“Word of the Day: Lumbersexual.”

After that Rob and Stephen sent us home and then the only thing left was the J2 autograph signings.

Oh, boy. We got Jensen first, and now that I had a little more time (because they really do rush you through the photo ops) it really hit me just how goddamn pretty he is. Obviously he’s an attractive guy, but in person? With the hair and the jawline and the lips and the eyes? Some lucky person ahead of us in line got the full force of the lip bite. Oh, to be that fortunate. Sigh.

Anyways. We get up there, in front of him, and after he asked how we were doing, my mom said something along the lines of, “I just wanted to thank you, because this show is the reason she is who she is, and her dad hasn’t always been the best dad, but you guys have kind of been like stand-in fathers for her.” She was tearing up and I just nodded in agreement and Jensen was smiling so soft at both of us - smile lines in full effect (did I mention he’s pretty?). I jumped in here and gestured to her crying and said, “She wouldn’t stop making fun of me earlier for not being able to say anything but ‘hi’ at the photo op.” That made him laugh and he looked at my photo and was like, “Look at that smile though!” Then he looked back up and grabbed my hand (*internal screaming intensifies*) then my mom’s and said that he loves hearing stories like that from fans. And that was that.

When we finally got up to Jared my mom had calmed down - like me, she got it out of her system. I had two things I wanted Jared to sign: my photo op with him, and this:

It was a chalk piece I did at a local street painting festival in February 2016, and I got so many compliments on it just for the quote alone. So I stepped up to the table and the first thing Jared said was, “I like your shirt.” I handed the AKF photo to him to sign and he got this big grin on his face and asked, “What’s that?” My mom and I both were like, “That’s you!” He said, “I know that, but what is it?” I explained what it was, then gave him a smaller version of it, saying, “That one’s for you to keep.” He looked at it, looked at me, and said, “Wow. This is amazing. You’re amazing.” Gave me a high five (his hands are so huge, damn). My mom said, “You’re amazing” and Jared replied with, “Well, that’s only because I get to be around amazing people all day.” He put his copy of the photo in a little box with other things people had given him, then when he turned back around he grinned again and said, “Fuck that’s cool.”

So he signed the AKF one, then my mom again explained the impact both he and Jensen have had on me and how “she fell in love with the show and the characters and then with you as people and as fathers, because her father isn’t always around.” Jared said, “Well thank you for being part of the family.” I was like, “No thank you.” Because seriously, without them, none of this would be possible as a fandom. Then he went to sign my photo op and said, “Now I feel bad for putting my arm on your head.” We laughed and said it was perfectly fine.

My mom asked real quick if he could write out “always keep fighting” for the tattoo I’m going to be getting, and the people at the table were like, “You only had two autographs” or whatever but Jared immediately said, “No I’ll write it. My handwriting is horrible, though.”

And that was it. I’m still overwhelmed by it all. Meeting them has been my dream for years. It doesn’t really feel real. But hey, Jared said I’m amazing and Jensen held my hand and Rob winked at me (and liked my tweet!!!), so I’m happy. Can’t wait to see what surprises the next go-round brings. But until then, stay lovely.

(If you’ve made it this far, congrats! I apologize for the ridiculous length. But while I have you here, if you have any fic ideas/requests, my inbox is always open.)