#I mean there’s clumsy and accident prone and then there’s… cursed by the gods

[mycological-mariner]

Today has not been a good day for caring for myself. I have, in the last 13 hours:

— stubbed my toe so badly I actually screamed obscenities loud enough for people to knock and ask if everything was okay

— broke my toe (different toe)

— stabbed myself in the finger and bled on every possible surface looking for plasters (before giving up and wrapping a hair tie around my finger as tourniquet and a piece of kitchen roll in the absence of plasters)

— stubbed my toe again

— a third time I stubbed it but this time I also rammed my knee into the corner of a bed frame

— brained myself on the ceiling (not meant for anyone above 5’6”)

— brained myself on the doorjamb (twice, different doorjambs)

— fell down the stairs

— fell up the stairs

— fell down a second time

— dropped a large pot on my foot with the broken toe

I’m in a slap-stick. My feet and legs are covered in bruises so purple they’re almost black. At the very least, I have a hot water bottle which at least is helping my neck pain

[bruhstories]

Of Tattoos and Accidents

Summary: Sasha and Connie drag you to your tattoo appointment and you don’t regret it. Pairing: Armin Arlert x Fem!Reader Warnings & Content: language, tattoo artist!Armin Word Count: 1.3 k

A/N: Ha, I didn't write a smutty piece!

"Ready for your first tattoo?" Connie barged into your bedroom followed by Sasha as you were brushing your untamed hair. "Absolutely not. Is it too late to cancel?" You sighed, the idea of a needle poking your skin making you throw up. "Come on, Y/N, you had 2 fractured ribs, a broken leg and you still walked to class after that wardrobe fell on you. You can take a needle." Sasha encouraged you, her hand patting your head. "Yeah, and then I fainted during that same class." "I'm amazed, really. Remember when you got run over, got up and still came to my party?" Connie shook his head. "How are you scared of a tattoo?" "I'm just scared of needles, okay?" You sighed. There was nothing you could do to convince your friends to cancel that stupid appointment you drunkenly made. "But not scared of getting hit by a car? Come on, Y/N, we're gonna be late." The brunette grabbed your arm and dragged you out of the room with Connie pushing you from behind. It was decided: they were gonna force you to get that tattoo whether you liked it or not. Besides, how bad could it be? "I don't wanna do this, guys. Please, let's go back! I promise I'll do your dishes for the rest of my life!" You cried out as your friends pulled you into the tattoo parlour. Your hand grabbed the door handle as you were trying to resist them, nails clawing their arms. "Sweet Jesus, let go of me or I'll call your parents!" You resorted to empty threats. "Um, you guys need any help?" A foreign voice asked and your eyes darted to the source. "Hi, you must be Armin." Connie smiled, his arms around your waist as he tried to pick you up but you just wouldn't let go of the damn handle. "I'm Connie, I have an appointment with Eren. These are Sasha and Y/N." "Is she alright?" Armin whispered, a look of concern on his face. "She's just stubborn, aren't you?" "I wanna go home, please!" You bit into Sasha's hand, the girl letting out a yelp. "Y/N? You must be my 3 o'clock." The blond calmly stated. "First time, I assume?" He playfully asked you. "Come on, woman, get it together. Remember when that dog bit you and you limped back home, too afraid to go to the hospital?" Connie snickered. "Please stop talking." You pursed your lips. "Hey, I promise it won't hurt." Armin smiled. Your grip around the handle loosened and you finally took a good look at him. A few piercings in his ears, a killer tattoo around his neck and eyes so blue you could drown in them. The man looked both like an angel and a devil, and it intrigued you. After you finally calmed down your friends went into two separate rooms, Connie to get his seventh tattoo, Sasha to pierce her septum and you were left with Armin, who invited you into what seemed like a reception room. "You don't have to bullshit me, I know it's gonna hurt like a motherfucker." You took a seat on an armchair as he handed you a portfolio of his drawings and doodles to choose from. "I'm not bullshitting you, it all depends where you'll have me– it. The tattoo." The blond shook his head at his slip and you couldn't stifle the giggle that came out of your mouth. "Sorry, it's been a long day." He lied. "No worries." You smiled and flipped through the pages. "Wait, these are all done by you?" "Every single one." "Damn, you're really good!" "Thanks." His cheeks flushed red. "Um, anyway, it really all depends on the area on your body. Shoulders hurt the least." "What hurts the most?" You asked, curiosity dripping down your tongue. "Umm... feet and... " "And?" "L-lower areas." Armin was blushing furiously. Normally he wouldn't have a problem explaining these things to his clients, he wasn't necessarily a prude, but something about you made him stutter like a toddler. "Oh, ooooh, I get it, duh!" You rolled your eyes at the slow gears in your head. "I think I want this one." You handed him back his portfolio and pointed at the splendid drawing of two koi fish, representing yin and yang. It perfectly mirrored your style, as well as your personality, and you were content with your choice. "Perfect! And where will you have

me? IT! Jesus, I'm so sorry." He trailed off, your smile only making him more flustered. "Honestly, just take me out first." You joked, fingers playing with a lock of hair. "I think I'll have it on my upper shoulder. I'm not ready for too much pain yet." "Great, let's get you ready." The shirt you were wearing was loose enough for you to pull it down your arm, offering Armin both enough room to work, and a good view into your cleavage whenever he got up from his chair. He was a professional, though, and whenever he focused nothing could distract him. The first puncture made you suck your teeth and clench your fists but he was right, it didn't hurt as bad as you thought it would. "So, what was that about a dog biting you?" The blond asked, brows furrowed, eyes on your shoulder. "Oh, God, Connie and his stupid mouth... I'm kinda prone to accidents. I'm not clumsy, just severely lacking luck." You explained with a sigh. "Yet you're still scared of needles?" "Um, yes? I guess we all have a phobia. Some are scared of spiders, others of heights. I'm terrified of needles." "Yet I'm poking you." Armin laughed, the smile quickly fading after realising how sexual that sounded. "With a needle, I mean." You were beginning to wonder if he was doing it on purpose. "Well, I gotta face my fears, don't I? Besides, I've always wanted a tattoo. I used to get those temporary ones when I was a kid." "Well, maybe you'll get some more. Oh, I'm gonna have to do the shading now. This might hurt a bit more." He let you know before getting up and changing the needle. "Got anything for me to bite into?" You joked, genuinely hoping it wouldn't be that bad, but to Armin it sounded like an invitation. "N-not really." "I'll just use my hand then." Goodness gracious, it hurt like a bitch. You bit into your knuckles, almost drawing blood, muffled curses filling the room. It amused and concerned him to see someone so determined to get a tattoo, despite your intolerance for pain and fear of needles. "Fucking hell!" You removed the fist out of your mouth, nails digging into your thighs. "Bitch ass motherfucker!" "It's over!" Armin laughed at your reaction. "It's alright, Y/N, I'm done." "Oh, thank the fucking Lord!" You wiped the tears off of your cheeks. Armin cleaned you up and gently placed a patch over your first (and last) tattoo before handing you a booklet with instructions. The two of you walked back into the reception room and you plopped back on the armchair, careful not to touch it with your shoulder. "Um, I don't normally do this but do you want to go out for a drink sometime?" The blond smiled. "I'm paying." "Yeah, you better pay after what I went through." You chuckled. "So, is that a yes?" "It's a definite yes." "Y/N, I thought you were getting murdered in there." Connie walked in followed by who you assumed to be Eren. "Ah shit, was I that loud?" "Loud? I think you guys need to soundproof your rooms." Sasha chimed in, flaunting her new piercing. Armin walked you and your friends out and handed you a small piece of paper with his number on it. "What was that all about?" The brunette eyed you up and down with a shit-eating grin on her face. "I don't know what you're talking about." You slid the paper in your pocket. "Wait, Armin gave you his number? Think you can get me a free tat?" Connie sneered at you. "Oh, yeah, totally!" "Really?" "Hell no."

[rorynne]

Purple

Square: Soulmates @clintbartonbingo

Rating: G

Warning: General fluff and a soulmate AU if that isnt your thing

Pairing: Clint Barton/Reader

Summary: Almost everyone grows up unable to see their soulmate's favorite color. For you, that was purple. So what happens when you spot a clumsy man in your favorite cafe, wearing the weirdest shirt you've ever seen?

Masterlist

You sighed as you squinted at your phone, trying your absolute best to help your friend decide what color she should use for her wedding. She had narrowed it down to two colors: blue and… purple. AKA, the only color you couldn't see. And this particular shade of it managed to look exactly like the blue to you.

A certain level of color blindness was pretty common, almost everyone was born unable to see their soulmate's favorite color. A phenomenon that was only cured the moment you saw your soulmate for the first time. Of course, some people didn't have a soulmate, or their soulmate didn't have a favorite color. They were either blessed or cursed, depending on who you asked. Right now, you were leaning on the side of blessed.

You set your phone down with a frustrated shake of your head. It wasn't often your soulmate's favorite color gave you such grief, purple wasn't exactly the world's most common color after all. You rarely even thought of it honestly, not like how some people worried about it at least. You figured if you met them, then you met them, if not, oh well. You were never too partial to any color anyway, so you doubted you were really missing out on much.

A loud crash drew you out of your reverie, pulling your attention to a tall blond man frantically trying to pick up the straw dispenser and recollect the straws spilled from it. The red-headed woman next to him rolled her eyes, saying something you didn't quite catch. You were too focused on his shirt to properly eavesdrop on whatever she was saying.

His short was, probably, the strangest thing you had ever seen. A plain Tshirt in a shade you had never seen before, almost like someone royally fucked up the color blue. You watched him like he had grown three extra heads in the span of a minute, earning a curious look from the woman he was with as they sat down barely a table away.

His shirt color was actually pretty nice you decided, you liked it, and it looked shockingly good on him. You wondered if it was some kind of designer color, like the blackest black or pinkest pink that people had taken to trying to make. Whatever it was, you liked it, especially on him. You took a sip of your coffee as you continued to watch him.

Attractive as hell might have been an understatement, tall and muscular with a relaxed smirk of a smile as he talked to the redhead. He gestured with his heavily bandaged hand as he took a drink from his cup using the other, equally bandaged hand. From the looks of it, he was prone to accidents. "I'm telling you, Kate is great, you'd love her. Last week she-" The man cut off mid-sentence when he glanced down at his shirt, doing a double-take before exclaiming, "What the fuck happened to my shirt?" He looked back at the straw dispenser as if it was potentially the cause of this mystery.

The woman shook her head, a bemused eyebrow raised, "Nothing's happened to your shirt, Clint."

The man, Clint, held up some of the fabric in distress, "What are you talking about? It's blue!"

"Still looks purple to me." She said calmly with a shrug, sipping her own drinking. Your jaw dropped. That was purple? You scrambled to pick up your phone, to look at the color swatches your friend had sent. Sure enough, there sat two distinctly different colors on your screen, blue and what you now knew to be purple. "Maybe your soulmate has a new favorite color?" She offered with a teasing smile.

He gave her a look as if the very concept were ridiculous. "We both know I don't have a soul mate Tasha." You're heart skipped. Of course, he would think that you didn't have a favorite color. Until now.

"Maybe they just picked one today." She said to him, but you swore to god she was looking at you out of the corner of her eye.

Clint's face wavered, clearly considering the possibility that 'Tasha' was right. He groaned and buried his face in his hands. "Aw, soulmate, no. Why do you have to have good taste?"

"You know," she said, now you were positive she was looking at you. "They wouldn't even know what purple looks like unless they saw you."

Clint lifted his face from his hands, mouth agape. Your own heart rate felt like it doubled. This man was your soulmate, and you both were just sitting there frozen in place like idiots. "Then that means…" He trailed off as his brain started to fully understand what the woman had meant.

"They might still be here." She nodded, cocking her head towards you. Your eyes went wide, she knew. Of course, she fucking knew, you had only been staring at them like a deer in headlights for the past fifteen minutes. The moment Clint followed the direction of the woman's head to you, you panicked, jolting up from your seat as your face flushed red.

You weren't sure why you ran, maybe the realization of meeting your soulmate felt all too real to you, but you did run. You heard the man swear and the clatter of a chair before a holler of "Wait!" But you didn't stop, rushing out of the cafe doors before he could manage to say anything more. You were halfway down the street when a hand wrapped firmly around your arm, stopping you in your tracks. "Please wait." He pleaded again, nowhere near as out of breath as you were.

You looked up at him, panting for breath, unsure of what to say. What does someone even say to their soulmate? "I'm sorry I-"

"D'you like purple?" He asked, interrupting you and jarring your train of thought. You blinked and nodded, eyes wide. He nodded in return, "Great because I didn't want to spend the rest of my life unable to see my favorite color." Your heart cracked at his words. It wasn't unheard of for soulmates to decide not to pursue each other. After all, just because you were someone's soul mate, that didn't mean you necessarily loved each other, romantically speaking. Platonic soulmates were a thing, as rare as they were. But to hear your soulmate cared more about his favorite color than you, hurt. It hurt a lot.

"You didn't need to chase me out of the cafe for that." You said, voice wavering slightly.

His eyes went wide when he realized what he said. He swore and shook his head. "That's not what I meant I-" He shook his head again, rubbing the back of his neck. "Sweetheart, I'm still getting used to the idea that I have a soulmate, I didn't-" He cut himself off again, rubbing his face and muttering something that sounded like 'stop making a fool of yourself.' "Clint." He said abruptly, "My name is Clint. Do you want to go get a coffee?"

"I just had coffee." You said dumbly, immediately you wanted to kick yourself. Who was making a fool of themself now?

Clint sighed, "Lunch then…" he trailed off as if silently asking for your name.

"Y/N!" You blurted out, face warming. Who forgets to tell their soulmate their name? "It's Y/N, and yeah," you nodded, "lunch would be great."

"Great." He grinned, enough to make your stomach flip. You could get used to your soul mate having a smile like that. "That's great. I know where we can get the best pizza in New York."

Taglist:

@libellule2001 @geosaurusrrex @chloerinebarnes @sunkissedbarnes @mycroftlovescake @part-time-prefect

[stahlop]

Once Upon a Time 1x14 “Dreamy” Review

Reviews 1x01 1x02 1x03 1x04 1x05 1x06  1x07 1x08 1x09 1x10 1x11 1x12 1x13

I’m going to straight up be honest with everyone and tell you all that I really don’t like this episode. It had potential because Amy Acker was in it (Nova/Astrid) and I loved her as Fred from Angel, but this episode was not only horrible, but it changed up previous canon about Grumpy and dwarves in general and I just didn’t like it at all.

Summary: The annual Miner’s Day Festival is coming up. Mary Margaret and Leroy attempt to get people to buy candles so the nuns don’t lose their convent, but no one wants to buy anything from the town harlot and town drunk. In the EF, a newly born dwarf falls for a clumsy fairy.

Opening: The seven dwarves.

New Characters:

Dreamy (Grumpy)/Leroy: Oh, boy! Where to even start with this. Dwarves are apparently hatched from eggs and the ones all born from the same clutch are considered brothers who live and work together. And when they are given their axes it determines their names (which can change over time). The dwarf we��ve known as Grumpy in previous episodes hatches early due to some fairy dust that managed to only fall onto his egg, and he apparently had a vision of the fairy that dusted his egg, and because of this, the axe names him Dreamy, because his head seems to be in the clouds. A year later, Dreamy meets Nova, when she’s having trouble collecting her fairy dust and then almost loses it. Dreamy plays hero and saves it. Nova tells him her dream of becoming a fairy godmother and he tells ‘you can do anything as long as you can dream it.’ They embark on a very timid romance, as dwarves don’t fall in love (as we’re told repeatedly), and fairies aren’t supposed to fall in love either. Dreamy has to have the fact that he’s in love told to him by Belle, who just happens to be stopping by the tavern he and his brothers frequent. Belle also has to spell out to Dreamy that Nova wanted him to come see the fireflies with her, and wasn’t just talking about her love for them. Dreamy rushes to see Nova and he talks about getting a boat to see the world. Once the fireflies appear, Nova kissed Dreamy and they make plans to run off together. I’m sure that would work out well. Stealthy (aw, Stealthy) catches Dreamy trying to leave and wakes up their brothers. They don’t understand why he’s leaving, because dwarves can’t fall in love. Blue Fairy comes to visit and basically guilts Dreamy into breaking up with Nova by saying she’s ruining her potential if she runs off with him. When Dreamy meets up with Nova she has found a boat for them but Dreamy tells her it’s not love, just a dream. Nova is pleading with him, telling him she loves him. Dreamy tells her dwarves can’t love. That was way harsh, Dreamy. He then goes to the mines and breaks his axe with his angst. He gets a new axe that now names him Grumpy.

Leroy, meanwhile, is the town grump and drunk. Mary Margaret tries to get him to help her sell candles for the nuns, but he says the town hates the two of them so there’s no use trying. But his heart is warmed when he meets Astrid the nun, after she accidently dusts him with glitter. He gets her fairy lights running (not a euphemism). He tells her he’s always wanted to sail, she tells him ‘you can do anything as long as you can dream it.’ It seems to be love at first sight for Leroy, and Astrid seems pretty smitten, considering she thinks she’s a nun. So Leroy volunteers to help sell candles after he hears Mother Superior tell Astrid she spent their whole budget on helium and now the nuns won’t be able to pay rent. If the convent closes it will be closed and they will be reassigned, and then Leroy would never get to see Astrid again. Leroy pledges to sell all $5000 worth of candles. But of course, no one wants to buy candles from Leroy or Mary Margaret. They attempt to sell door to door (Leroy says maybe people will buy candles just to make them go away), but still no one is buying. If this is such a ‘tradition’, should it matter who is selling the candle? Would the townspeople really be so petty about Mary Margaret and Leroy that they wouldn’t help out the nuns? Leroy, so smitten with Astrid, lies and tells her that he sold all the candles. Mary Margaret is furious, but then realizes that Leroy likes Astrid. She comments on how he couldn’t have picked someone less available. He retorts about her going after a married guy (to be fair, the married guy did leave his wife eventually, it’s doubtful the nun will leave her devotion to God). Leroy vows to get the money. He attempts to sell his boat to Gold (well, says he can have the boat as long as he puts what he would pay him towards the nuns rent),but Gold hates the nuns so he won’t help Leroy out. Astrid comes by with a pie and discovers all the candles on Leroy’s boat. He goes to drink with Mary Margaret who reminds him he can’t have a relationship with a nun. Leroy tells her that Astrid was the first person to ever believe in him. He just wanted a good memory with Astrid and drinking won’t help the pain, only one thing will. It looks as though Leroy is going to jump off the roof but he tells Mary Margaret he would never do that because he might hurt someone. He finds a convenient axe and hits the transformer, effectively cutting the lights in the town and making everyone have to buy candles.

So we basically have two sides of the coin with Dreamy (Grumpy)/Leroy and Nova/Astrid. Dreamy cannot ‘love’ because he is a dwarf and they cannot love and Astrid is a nun so she cannot love.

Nova/Astrid: Nova is a clumsy fairy who dreams of becoming a fairy godmother. She is tasked with bringing the year’s supply of fairy dust to the Blue Fairy. Considering how accident prone she is, I find this an odd task for her, but okay. Blue let’s her know that she’ll get to do it on her own next year and Nova is disappointed because she was hoping to be a fairy godmother. And then Blue laughs right in her face. I mean, I know Nova isn’t the best fairy around, but that’s rude Blue. And then Blue calls Nova a dreamer, which makes it all the more fortuitous that she not only accidently creates Dreamy, but later falls for him. When Nova meets Dreamy a year later he helps her when she almost makes a mess with the fairy dust and then when it almost goes into the incinerator because of her clumsiness. Look, I get being adorkable, that’s how Amy Acker’s character was on Angel, but she is really over the top here. No other fairy that we’ve met is like this. They seem to be all business, and yet here is Nova who doesn’t seem to have a clue. I get why Dreamy likes her, because they are very similar, and he’s never seen a girl before, except in his dreams, but their relationship makes very little sense. Nova tells Dreamy about the fireflies, but he doesn’t get that she’s inviting him to come with her to see them. So, of course she’s thrilled when he does show up. Nova is sad looking over the town where the fireflies will be because she wants to be part of the world and not over it. Dreamy is in the same situation but under the world in the mines. So that means they should run away together. Nova says she’ll meet him after she delivers the fairy dust. And somehow Blue finds out about all this which ends with Nova getting her heart broken because Dreamy says he can never love her since dwarves can’t fall in love. Amy Acker was excellent in this part. She finally gets to live in the world by falling in love and her heart gets broken because of it. Poor Nova.

All the fairies have become nuns in Storybrooke. Interesting route to go there. I guess it makes sense because the fairies would have had their own community and they curse needed for them to all stick together. Astrid is one of the nuns, who is just as accident prone and clueless as Nova was and also seems to have a soft spot for Leroy after he gets the fairy lights working. She tells him he can do anything. She has inadvertently ordered too much helium for the Miner’s Day Festival and depleted their budget so now they can’t pay rent. By the end, Leroy has gotten the money and Astrid is happy and it looks like we’ll have a good friendship going until the curse breaks. Maybe she’ll be able to forgive him for breaking her heart then.

Character Observations:

Mary Margaret: Okay, I get that she had an affair with David and essentially broke up their sham of a marriage, but Mary Margaret has been nothing but an upstanding citizen of Storybrooke for as long as anyone can remember. Would the denizens of Storybrooke really turn on her that easily. And why is no one mad at David for his part of the affair? Stupid double standards. So Mary Margaret is trying to find volunteers for the Miner’s Day Festival because half her volunteers quit due to her affair. What? Would people really quit volunteering due to the volunteer coordinator having an affair? Is this what it’s like living in a small town where everyone knows your business? This whole thing is insane. She made a mistake getting involved with a married man, but he did leave his wife so as to not continue the affair, so give them both some credit. Argh! Leroy calls Mary Margaret the Town Harlot. Seriously? With the way Ruby dresses, Mary Margaret is the Town Harlot? With the way Whale flirts with anyone on two legs, Mary Margaret is the Town Harlot? Give me a break. So Mary Margaret is basically trying to get these candles sold and the only one in town who will help her is Leroy, who is also despised because he is the town drunk. Very judgy, this town. In the end, the town has to buy candles from them, despite the fact that Leroy kind of forced them to because he cut the power. And since they sell out, Granny lights Mary Margaret’s candle as a way of making amends for judging her last week and it seems the rest of the town forgives her too. And all is right with Mary Margaret again.

Blue Fairy: I don’t really have much to say about her except that she is a terrible leader. She laughs at Nova when she expresses interest in becoming a fairy godmother. And she later tells Dreamy to break things off with Nova because he’s limiting her at becoming something great. How about Nova makes up her own mind about what she wants to do with her life?

Emma: She is looking into Kathryn’s disappearance. Her theory of Kathryn’s car breaking down and hitching a ride to Boston or a bus station is nixxed when Kathryn’s suitcase is still in the trunk of the car. She believes David is innocent of any foul play because of her superpower, but she begins to doubt him when she sees the phone records Sidney brings her. She eventually has to bring David in for questioning and puts him in the back of the sheriff’s car in front of the whole town.

David: Seems to be oblivious to anything going on with Kathryn. Swears they haven’t talked since she left and is surprised when she is deemed missing and he could possibly be a suspect. Dumb, dumb David.

Belle: We get a glimpse of her at the tavern Dreamy is drinking at. She basically tells him that what he’s feeling toward Nova is love and to hold onto it. She says it’s the most wonderful and amazing thing, it’s hope, it fuels our dreams. And that it doesn’t last forever. This is obviously not too long after she left Rumplestiltskin’s but before she returns home or Regina gets her (still not sure which one happens, only that Belle is captive in SB).

Questions:

Why is Kathryn starting law school in February or March? It was Valentine’s Day a few episodes ago so we know it’s around this time, plus the cool weather (even though it looks like fall and not winter). Wouldn’t law school either start in September or January?

Why does Gold (Rumplestiltskin) hate the nuns (fairies) so much?

Why is Emma still believing everything Sidney tells her after the whole playground debacle? 

How did Blue know about Dreamy and Nova’s plans? Is she all knowing? Nova never said anything to her that we know of.

Did Regina doctor the phone records to make it look like he and Kathryn had that 8 minute phone conversation?

Why did Emma have to bring David to the station in her car? Could he not have come in on his own accord?

What happened to Grumpy’s story about being in love with a woman who looked like a fairy but left him and he ended up in jail for buying a stolen diamond in 7:15 AM? This episode doesn’t jive with that story and Grumpy doesn’t seem the type to make up a story for sympathy.

Observations:

Dwarves are hatched from eggs, fully clothed and with a full beard.

Dwarves don’t fall in love.

The pick axe determines the dwarves name.

It looks like Belle has just been let go by Rumplestiltskin at this point and is drowning her sorrows about him choosing his power over her at the tavern.

All the fairies are nuns.

The couple Mary Margaret and Leroy try to sell candles to are reminiscent of the nursery rhyme ‘Jack Sprat could eat no fat, his wife could eat no lean’

Once Upon a Time Firsts:

Gold/Rumplestiltskin’s hatred of the nuns/fairies

Names:

Nova means new.

Astrid means beautiful and beloved.

I did not like this episode. The whole Dreamy/Nova storyline was very convoluted and the treatment of Mary Margaret just made me very angry.

Please leave comments and reblog!

@searchingwardrobes @thisonesatellite @justbecauseyoubelievesomething @laschatzi @profdanglaisstuff @mariakov81

[hoyoungy]

Stimulant | RM/Namjoon

genre: comedy, soulmate au, tattoo artist au | tattoo artist!namjoon x reader summary: with immense pain comes immense pleasure, and that was definitely the case when you could feel everything your accident-prone soulmate feels word count: 2722 a/n: i had a lot of fun writing this lol. warnings include swears, mentions of sex/masturbating, and that it’s a dialogue-heavy fic. as seen on my ao3

You hated your soulmate. You absolutely hated your soulmate, and you haven’t even met him yet.

You didn’t start feeling what he felt until recently. The very first thing you felt was a cut on your hand and you started to bleed. A memorable first impression, to say the least. Then you developed more cuts, some bruises, and even muscle soreness. You thought that maybe it was all completely normal. You thought that all of this pain came with the package of finding your soulmate. But when you asked around how long until the bruising disappears, your friends just looked at you like you were crazy.

It was then you realized that maybe your soulmate was either accident prone or a masochist.

Or maybe they were both.

You would go about your normal day being extremely cautious and prepared for all the pain you would have to endure. Sometimes you would wake up thinking that maybe today would be the day your soulmate wouldn’t hurt himself. Sometimes you even sympathized - or was it technically empathized? - because there were times you had to go see a doctor when the injuries were more severe, thinking to yourself honestly, fuck you for bringing me here, but I hope you’re all right, too.

The scarring and bruises weren’t even the worst part of all of this. No, the worst part about being able to feel what your soulmate feels was the random bursts of pleasure that made you go insane. It was fine when it was night time and you were in the comfort of your home - at least that way no one could see your blushing face. But when you felt it in the middle of the day while you were at work, getting lunch, or even just fucking grocery shopping, you had to run to the bathroom so your soulmate could finish.

This morning you had a, uh, pleasant start to your day. You woke up panting, sweating, and flustered, trying to come down from the euphoria your soulmate caused all too frequently.

“Is my soulmate a chronic sex addict? For God’s sake, it’s seven in the morning!” you muttered bitterly. A shower was necessary to wash away the shame you felt for your partner.

In the shower, you enjoyed the peace and serenity the warm water gave you. It was a peaceful ten minutes that you thoroughly enjoyed until it was ruined again only moments later.

“Ow! Fucking christ!” you screamed. You saw some redness forming on your hand from inflammation caused by something. From your previous knowledge, it looked like it was from a burn from cooking breakfast.

How incredibly annoying was it that you already knew the reason for the burn?

“I’ll show you a burn.” You turned the shower handle to the hot side of the spectrum and endured the 0.2 seconds of scalding water all over your body. The pain you felt was worth the satisfaction knowing your partner’s probably cursing you out right now.

Did that make you the sadist? Or did that make you both masochists?

It was a constant battle of stimulation between the two of you that you didn’t even know what was accidental and what was on purpose anymore other than the infinite shameless times he’s had sex. Maybe he thought the same about you, too. What if he thought you were the clumsy one and he was doing the exact same thing by hurting himself to get back at you?

Kind of fucked up, huh?

“Rough morning?” your roommate asks, raising her eyebrow at you. She probably guessed by the sour look on your face as you exited the bathroom.

“Woke up to my soulmate having sex again and a burn from when he was cooking. Who the fuck has the time and energy to fuck this early!?”

“You’d be surprised,” she smirks. “Maybe he’s not having sex, maybe he’s, you know.” She gestures to you a juvenile attempt at a hand job.

“Either way, it’s annoying and embarrassing, like does he not have any shame? I can’t remember a time where I’d go at least three days without having an orgasm because of him.”

“He’s just not embarrassed to touch himself like you are, obviously…”

“Shut up.”

She wasn’t wrong. You haven’t had sex nor have you touched yourself because honestly, you’d be thinking about your soulmate the entire time, and it was embarrassing.

“You need to relax and just do it, _____. You’ve been so irritable lately, it’s driving me insane.”

“I know, I’m sorry, ok. I’ve just been so preoccupied trying to find him for months, but I’ve had absolutely zero luck!”

“Maybe that’s why. You can’t just go out looking for someone with no leads. You have no idea what you’re looking for.”

“I don’t, and I’ve never felt so lost,” you pout. “But maybe I’ll find him after today.”

“Why, what do you have in mind?”

“He’s going to hate me so much after today that he’s bound to show up.”

The malicious smirk on your lips caused your roommate to take a step back from you. “You’re not gonna, like, fling yourself down the stairs so you’d go to the hospital, are you?”

“What, no,” you said. “I’m going to get a tattoo.”

“You’re a psychopath.”

“I am not! If anything, he’s the psychopath!”

“You two are meant for each other.”

“Honestly, that’s so sweet of you to say.”

“Ow, shit!” Namjoon curses. The oil from the pan pops and hits his hand, giving him a small burn.

Immediately, a running Jin snatches the chopsticks away and pushes him aside. “What did I say about cooking!?”

“But I’m hungry…”

“Just ask next time! Look, you’re not even cooking it correctly - you’re supposed to scrape the ice off the dumpling before you put it in the pan so the oil doesn’t pop. You’re also not supposed to use olive oil for frying.”

“Ohhh…”

“I feel sorry for your soulmate. How are you even alive and functioning?”

“Yeah, how have they not tracked you down to kill you yet?” Hoseok teases, pushing Namjoon further away from the stove.

“She’s probably smart enough to know that doing so would kill her, too,” Yoongi scoffs.

“Shut up - HOLY FFFFFF -”

Namjoon couldn’t finish his sentence as he hunched over on the floor feeling like he was on fire. He struggled to turn on the faucet to run cold water on his minor burns. His inked skin was flushed a painful pink.

“What happened…?” Jin asked with wide eyes.

“I think my soulmate burned me on purpose!”

“That’s what you get for being so careless. I’m surprised they haven’t done so earlier.”

“They have! Every time I hurt myself, they hurt themselves back so I can feel it. Can you believe that!? Who hurts their soulmate on purpose!?”

“Oh, I definitely would if you were my soulmate,” Yoongi said. “I’d be pissed if my partner was chronically accident prone.”

“You guys are great friends, you know,” Namjoon said sarcastically as he dried himself off.

“Thanks!” Jungkook chimes.

“I’m going to the shop.”

“What about your dumplings!?”

“Fuck ‘em, you eat it.”

“Don’t hurt yourself too much today!” Jin calls as Namjoon walks out the door.

“Welcome!” the receptionist at the tattoo shop greeted you. “How can I help you?”

“Do you accept walk-ins?” you ask.

“Yes, Namjoon is available once he’s ready - speak of the devil.”

The door chimed as it swung open. A very tall, very good-looking man walks through the door with disheveled hair and a grumpy expression that was all too similar to yours, but somehow made him unbelievably handsome. His expression melts as he sees you and shoots you a quick wink with a dimple-y smile as he passes you.

“He’ll be your artist today. Now, because you’re alone, I assume you haven’t met your soulmate yet?”

“I haven’t. Why do you ask?”

“Those who have met or feel their soulmate need to have a cosigner that states they consent to the feeling of getting a tattoo.”

“Really!?” you said a little too loudly.

“Yes, it’s the law. So have you felt your soulmate at all?”

“Uh, n-no,” you lied. “Not yet, surprisingly.”

“Ok, well, then you need to sign these forms that state that if you’re caught lying, we have the right to report you to the authorities.”

“R-Right,” you stutter, reading the forms thoroughly before risking hundreds of dollars in fines and possinly jail time.

“All right, then you’re all set! Namjoon will call you when he’s ready.”

You sit in the waiting area impatiently tapping your feet. Your nails dig crescents into the palms of your hand unapologetically, with you not worrying about if your soulmate could feel it. To be honest, you were completely terrified about getting your first tattoo. You thought about the design in your car for like, ten minutes and thought up a bullshit reason in case they asked.

It’s not like you were going to tell them you were getting a tattoo out of spite. How crazy would that make you look?

I mean, of course you were crazy, but you didn’t want anyone to know that.

“_____?” The man named Namjoon asked.

His arms were now exposed as he settled into the shop, showing you nearly a dozen or so on his sleeve. Even from far away, you could tell how intricate they were, telling you that it must’ve taken hours to complete each one. Your eyes widened, sympathizing with his soulmate, that poor person…

“Are you ready?” he asked you.

“Yeah,” you sigh, hesitation evident in your voice.

“Scared?”

You take a seat and watch him prep his needles and ink. Why were there so many tools…

“Y-Yeah,” you stutter. “Does it hurt…?”

“Oh, yeah, like a bitch,” he chuckles. “No matter how many tattoos I get, they all hurt as much as the last, although the very first one is unforgettable.”

“Gee, thanks.”

“I’m just being honest! You’re here now, no use turning back, right?”

“I suppose… Has your soulmate ever felt any of those?”

Namjoon sits across from you and gives you another smile with his heart-stopping dimples. “No. I got these way before I even started to feel them. I haven’t gotten one since the day I started to feel.”

“How come?”

“Well, I haven’t met them yet. I’m also an extremely clumsy person, so they experience enough pain from me,” he chuckles. Man, did you definitely related to his soulmate all too well. “I could never ask them to go through with a tattoo if they’ve never had one yet.”

“That’s very considerate of you.”

“I suppose it is. It’s the least I can do.” Namjoon rolls his chair close enough for you to smell his intoxicating cologne. “So what am I drawing on you today?”

“Just an outline of a crescent moon.”

“Simple. I like it.”

“To be honest, I thought of the design in the car,” you said, scratching your arm nervously. “I just want to get the feeling out of the way before I meet - feel my soulmate.”

“That’s cute,” he chuckles again. “All right, this shouldn’t take longer than five minutes.”

He put on some nylon gloves and shaves the part of your arm where you want the tattoo. His hands are warm and comforting, easing your nervousness, although it quickly came back when he buzzes the needle.

“Oh, shit,” you whisper. Were you making a big mistake? Were you taking your pettiness too far?

No, you had every right to…

“Ready?” he asked.

“No.”

“Good enough. It’ll only hurt for a few minutes.”

When the needle touched your skin, you nearly blacked out.

“Jesus fucking Christ!” you screamed.

“Ow, fucking hell!” Namjoon screamed, too.

You both swung your heads to look at each other with wide eyes. At first you were extremely confused. The only reason Namjoon would be screaming in pain is if his soulmate was doing something reckless. Was it a coincidence that he felt pain as you were getting a tattoo? But then it clicked in your head that it was, in fact, you who was being the reckless soulmate.

“You!” you both said, pointing to each other accusingly.

“You’re my soulmate!? Are you fucking kidding me?” you sigh. “Boy, do I have a lot to say to you.”

“You have a lot to say to me!?” You look at him with a blank expression and your glad to see that he nods his head understandingly. “Ok, yeah, I probably do deserve a mouthful…”

“Yeah, you do.”

“But ~ you did just lie about not feeling your soulmate! I could report you!” You silently slump in your seat with a pout on your face. “But you’re really cute, so I won’t.”

“Normally, I’d be flattered, but I’m a bit angry at you at the moment.”

“All right, let me hear what you have to say about my clumsiness.”

You sighed, collecting all of your thoughts. “First of all, how?”

“It’s an innate gift I’ve been given.”

“Do you see all of my bruises?” You rolled up your pants to expose your purple shins. “And this cut?” You point to a healing scar on your cheek. “And this burn on my hand from this morning? What were you even making?”

“The, uh, dumplings had ice on them, so the oil sparked.”

“Frying ice, of course my soulmate would do that.”

“I’m not good in the kitchen, ok,” he frowns.

“Second question, do you have a girlfriend or significant other or enjoy frequent nights out in the town?”

He raises a curious brow at you and you try to suppress any current thoughts about his handsomeness that distract you from seeing him as anything other than irritating at the moment. “Are you making sure that I’m all yours?”

“No, I’m asking you why you have sex almost every day at the worst times.”

“Oh, that!” he said, bursting into a fit of laughter. How he was not even at least a little embarrassed amazed you. “Well, to make things clear, I don’t have a girlfriend, or significant other, or enjoy midnight reandezvous.”

“Then what the fuck are you doing - Oh…” You paused. If he didn’t do any of those, then that meant… The growing smirk on Namjoon’s face only confirms your assumption. “Really? You masturbate every day!?”

“Relax, it’s not every day. As you said, I do so almost every day.”

“Do you know how embarrassingly frustrating and also hilariously ironic it is when I’m picking up an eggplant at a grocery store and I can feel you doing your business?”

“But you like it, don’t you?” Namjoon leans his face close to yours. Close enough that you could feel his breath tickle your cheek. “Doesn’t it feel good?”

“Of course it feels good, it always does, but I like to plan my orgasms, thank you.”

“But that was the beauty of it, my dear. Knowing that as I’m touching myself, somewhere out there, you were enjoying it as much as I was. It’s intoxicating.” He licks his lips and suddenly your mind became hazy. “Didn’t you enjoy it this morning?”

“Yes,” you stated plainly, though blushing deeply.

“Of course you did. In fact, I can already feel that you’re aroused just by the mere thought of it,” he teased. “Imagine the euphoria we could feel together. It’d be twice as ecstatic, wouldn’t it?”

“If you’re that curious, let’s find out.”

“Wait, Really!?”

“After this tattoo.”

“I’ve been meaning to give you a mouthful about that, too,” he said. “How dare you hurt yourself on purpose just so I could feel it. Does that make you the sadist between the two of us?”

“You know, I’ve thought about it before, and I think me getting a tattoo done by you confirms it.”

“After all the pinching, shower burns, and nail-digging,” he paused, showing you the indented crescents on his palm. “I think so, too. Though of course, I will admit to being the fuel to the fire.”

“So long as you acknowledge it.”

“Let’s get this tattoo over with so we can get to the real fun, shall we?” he smirked.

“Can I get some lunch or dinner before that, at least? Where’s the chivalry?”

“How rude of me. I’ll need the energy, anyways, I skipped breakfast this morning.”

[queerloveandspaceships]

I've just been particularly intrigued by what you've posted from Rem(a)inder so far. So for Angie and/or Ian, if you don't mind... 21, 25, 36, 45? :D

Thank you so much!!! I’m honestly just delighted that you’ve been intrigued by anything on this mess of a blog, especially my beloved and missed Rem(a)inder! You even remembered the parentheses! T_T

21. Do they have a temper? Are they patient? What are they like when they do lose their temper?

This is a really good one for Ian!! So, Ian is essentially two different characters throughout the story. When Angie meets Ian (well, Ian’s “replicated intelligence” hologram, but updated with her moods and long-term memory so it’s BASICALLY her), Ian’s snippy, sarcastic, a little crass, very blunt, and definitely has a temper. When she’s angry, she doesn’t yell (my girl Ian always hates yelling) but instead she becomes a pillar of ice. She’s calm, straight as a rod, usually with her arms crossed over her chest, and she delivers insults and/or curses (whatever’s appropriate for the situation) with cold, focused intent. 

However, someone reverse-engineers the chip in Ian’s head, and reverts Ian’s hologram to a version of her from six years previous (the computer stores “versions” of all their replicated intelligence holograms) So for a great portion of the story, she’s got the personality of Ian from six years ago. Before she was betrayed by her business partner, before her invention was stolen, before she became this isolated loner obsessed with revenge. So she’s INFINITELY less prone to anger, and really only gets angry when she’s afraid and she’s trying to channel that fear. Old-Ian is a completely different person from the Ian Angie meets, and part of Ian’s character arc is about rediscovering the betrayals and traumas she’s faced, coming to terms with those, and essentially becoming who she was in the beginning of the story, but with an opportunity now to heal. (I love her so much. My poor angry daughter)

25. What do they find funny? Do they have a good sense of humour? Are they funny themselves?

Angie wishes she were funny, but is just a little too awkward with people, haha! She’ll tell a joke and it won’t land and then she’ll think about it for the next ten years, wake up at 3 a.m. like “why did I SAY that??” (But it doesn’t stop her from trying when she’s comfortable with someone.) Her sense of humor is self-deprecating or observational, really wry stuff, which is one reason she gets along with Ian well!

Ian’s funny in a sarcastic way. She’s not much one for “jokes” but she sees the world in such a cynical way that her observations can either inspire laughter or “oh my god, I can’t believe you just said that.” Depending on who she’s talking to. Angie thinks she’s funny, and Ian’s just a little proud of that haha

36. What are they good at? What hobbies do they like? Can they sing?

Angie is good at WAY more things than she thinks she is. Though she’s an engineer and therefore very scientific, she’s also creative and channels her creative energy into making jewelry. It’s easily her favorite hobby, though she’s also very fond of working out. She’s a stress-exerciser. Loves those endorphins! Haha! Can’t hold a tune to save her life. People will pay her NOT to sing.

Ian loves dancing. She doesn’t have any formal training, but she’s been going to clubs and dance halls for so long that she’s gotten pretty good, and she’s really naturally graceful. Plus, she’s always loved music and once wanted to be a professional singer, but in spite of lessons she just never really got better than mediocre, so dancing is a way for her to express her love of music. 

Needless to say, both of them are also very good at their jobs. Ian’s invention when she was 21 years old literally changed the world (though she maintains that it was part accident, and part a lot of help), and Angie managed to get selected for this super specialized job updating satellites even after suffering a massive traumatic brain injury. I’m so proud of them both. :’)

45. How do other people see them? Is it similar to how they see themselves?

People see Angie as this big, scary, hulking woman. They think she hates everyone she meets because she just has one of those faces, and it’s hard for her to connect to people like she could before the brain injury. She’s also just a solid wall of muscle with cropped hair so of course people are intimidated. (And this story isn’t set very far in the future, so society still has a lot of its current issues with femininity/masculinity.) She sees herself as a bull in a china shop, and the china shop is humanity. She feels completely out of place in the world, like her very presence there is destructive. Not only because of her size, but because she’s so clumsy with social interaction. Before the TBI she was a little more comfortable in her skin, but the recovery period was hard on her, and she’s never really been the same since.

People see Ian as this child prodigy (like I said, she was 21 when she invented [REDACTED]) and for a while after that invention, magazines were calling her the next Bill Gates or whatever, but that kind of pressure really got to her. She was certain her success couldn’t be replicated so she’s had impostor syndrome for ages. But people still view her as this accomplished scientist whether she wants them to or not, and it means people treat her differently. Either they want something from her or they’re nervous around her – sometimes both. 

Thank you again so much for asking!!! These were really fun! Makes me want to pick the Rem(a)inder back up….. T_T

[btssmxt-blog]

Can you write me a birthday fic with Namjoon? Please, it would be appreciated. Also, can it include smut? Thank you!

Birthday Sex

Pairing: Namjoon X Reader

Genre: …of course it’s smut, look at the title

Warning: 

“Can you just tell me what it is already?”

“No. What fun would that be?” His voice was almost monotone when he answered you. Namjoon held his hands over your eyes and he guided you through your shared home, practically in circles to disorientate you. You could hear him chuckling after you had nearly run into a wall. Not that you knew that. “Namjoon, where are you even taking me? This house isn’t that big!” You were slowly becoming frustrated by his playful antics; however, he decided it was enough the moment he heard the frustration lightly sprinkled in your demeanor. He wouldn’t play anymore. He stepped with you into the living room which was where you had begun in the first place, and he made you stand still.

“Are you ready?” He asked gently and rested his chin at the very top of your head. “I was born ready.” The reply was laced with your own playfulness as you tugged on his wrists, wishing desperately to see what the surprise was. He finally removed his hand from over your eyes and revealed to you something you…we’rent expecting.

Your smile slowly faded as you found yourself looking down at the livingroom coffee table. On it, sat a large red candle with a white ribbon tied around it. Leaning against it was a folded peace of paper you assumed was a makeshift card. Your brow furrowed and you turned your head around to look at him.

“Oh, you shouldn’t have.” You said monotonously. He only grinned at you. a small chuckle rattled his chest and he gestured to the “surprise”.

“Read it.” He told you. You rolled your eyes inwardly and you would humor him by going along with it. You sat down on the couch and picked up the card. You opened it to see his own handwriting.

 Happy Birthday, babygirl. I love you so much, and if you think this silly little candle is the entire surprise…I should be disappointed.

You looked back up at him, an eyebrow cocked curiously. “Namjoon..” You began but he cut you off with his index finger pressed to your mouth.

“Stand up, and take the candle with you.” A light pout formed on your face as all you wanted to do was just find out what he had planned. You stood like he told you to and you carried the candle in both of your hands. Namjoon pulled a lighter from his pocket and he held it out towards the wick before lighting it.

“Now here comes the real surprise babe. Follow me.”

You weren’t exactly following him as he had pulled you in front of him by the shoulders and guided you toward the bedroom. Only then did you notice flower petals strewn across the hallway floor. You stared down at them curiously. The further you walked, more things appeared. Instead of just flower petals, the entire rose was thrown on the floor. You knew that was going to be a chore to clean up. Next you notice small pink candles on the ground, leading up to your doorway.

“Joonie, this is a fire hazard.” You told him, knowing how clumsy and accident prone he can be. You heard him snort and he looked down at you. “Don’t worry, Jin-hyung and Jiminnie helped so nothing will go wrong.” You couldn’t argue with that statement you supposed. You knew that those two always made sure nothing could break or become disastrous after Namjoon has left or come into a room.

You finally peeked inside of your shared bedroom, Namjoon not forcing you to step in right away. You saw bigger candles that matched the one you carried, more flower petals and little vases of roses. Your lips tightened, not into a straight line, but in an attempt to not burst out in laughter. You turned around to face your boyfriend and you playfully hit his shoulder.

“Aye, what is this? Is this your attempt at being romantic? It’s my birthday, not Valentines day.” You teased. He rolled his eyes and then he took the candle from your hands. “I know what day it is.” He says softly. “That’s why I wanted it to be special. I wanted to make this a day you couldn’t forget. And what better way than to make sweat love to my one-and-only.” A cocky smirk appeared on his face and you could hear him chuckling under his breath. It was your turn to roll your eyes, but, other than his cockiness, you really appreciated his gesture, or at least the thought put behind all of this.

“You could have just taken me out for ice cream.” You said quietly. You were still teasing him and he knew so he wasn’t hurt. He grinned widely and carefully backed you up into the room. He set the candle down on the nightstand before he turned to face you again.

“How about homemade ice cream, hm? Namjoon flavored.”

“Oh my fucking god Namjoon!” You squealed, flushing red mostly in embarrassment for his sake at his comment. He laughed and walked up to you. He pulled you into his arms but all he did was hug you, rocking from one leg to the other.

“Y/N…” He begins slowly before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. You hummed in acknowledgement and looked up at him, your lashes fluttering slowly. “I meant what I said.” He cupped your chin and tilted your head up before he leaned down closer to your face. “You are my one-and-only, and you always will be.” You smirked and shook your head.

“Why are you acting like this?” Honestly you were embarrassed. He had never in the few years you have been together treated you like this. He was always playful and silly, or philosophical and curious. This was a new shade to his many colors that he was finally showing you. A shade of sincerity and deep honesty. You weren’t sure how to handle it

“Because I love you. I really do. And I really want you to know that I’m serious. About our relationship; about you.” You wanted to say something else, maybe even deny what he was trying to get across to you. But he shut your ass up before you could even take a breath. He leaned down far enough to be able to reach your lips and he kissed you. Not hard and rough, but gently with a sense of sincere passion. You couldn’t help but melt against his plush mouth. There was nothing you enjoyed more (other than the sex of course) than to kiss him. Make-out sessions were always your favorite pass times.

You finally relaxed into the situation. You pulled your arms up and wrapped them around his neck. The pads of your fingertips ran through the short hairs at his nape. You knew it was something he thoroughly enjoyed in any situation and you could practically hear him purring at the sensation. Your ears perked once you heard this sound and the corner of your mouth curled up into a small smirk. His hands moved down to your hips. He gripped them tightly in his large hands and pulled you flush against his body, pinning you in place so you wouldn’t move away. You snickered softly when you felt something pressing through his jeans against your stomach. You opened your eyes and pulled away from the kiss for a moment.

“You’re awake already?” You teased.

“Well I mean…just thinking about that homemade ice cream got me excited.” He said with a half smile. You laughed out loudly and pulled him closer (if that was even possible) by the neck.

“I love you too, Namjoon.” You finally responded, sincerely before kissing him again with a bit more heat behind it. He hummed happily and returned your kiss.

Things gradually heated up. Both of your kissing became messy but still managed to be passionate. After letting out a small moan, Namjoon couldn’t help but push his tongue into your mouth. He wrestled around in your wet cavern and began to push you backwards toward the bed. He loved the tiny little moans you gave when you were only kissing. It turned him on more than anything. You took a step back after every forward step he took until you found yourself falling backward onto the bed. The kiss broke and you looked up at him with your pupils blown and your lips red and swollen. You scooted up further onto the bed before Namjoon joined you, climbing up onto the mattress and then pulling your body up into his. He kisses you again, his wet muscle pushing in between your lips again making you moan again. He grunted in response as a sort of alternative way of cursing. He ground downward against your hips after having felt his member twitch in his jeans. You were always impressed by how fast he could get hard and he never failed to amaze you by it.

“Is it getting tight down here?” You asked breathlessly after breaking the kiss again. You tugged at the waist band of his jeans and grinned smugly at his serious expression. He didn’t say anything but he tilted his head and cocked an eyebrow, an expression he frequently used to say “What do you think?” You scoffed lightly and then reached up, brushing your thumb over his bottom lip.

“Take it off, Joonie.” You whispered to him. Your smile faded and you reached down once more, tugging at his waist band again. He watched you before it was his turn to wear a smirk.

“Eager, are we?” He teased as he began to undo his belt buckle.

“Who wouldn’t be eager to unwrap their gift on their birthday?” You smiled at him as you moved your hand out of his way; but he did not undress like you wanted him to. His smirk grew into a small smile and then he leaned down to where his lips could graze the tender skin of your neck.

“You can’t be too quick this time, Y/N.” He whispered before he pressed a tender kiss to the side of your neck. “I’m not fucking you this time, we’re making love.”

He kisses you again and again, leaving kisses all over your neck, under your chin, against the shell of your ear. For a moment it felt foreign. Not in a bad way, but just different. You tried to remember the last time the two of you actually made love and you only could think of one time when you both had just started dating. It was so long ago, that everything seemed new this time; having been so used to just having a good fuck.

Your breath hitched only slightly when he kissed down to your shoulder and then lightly nipped the soft skin. He moved over to your sensitive collar bones and nipped there until he was met with the hem of your collar.

“Lift up, love.” He whispered. You suddenly felt light. Like a feather. You just weren’t used to Namjoon being like this during sex. Yeah he was fluff in casual situations, but in the bedroom he was the complete and utter opposite (which was pretty hot). You sat up like he asked you to and he gently pulled your shirt over your head. He undid the hooks of your bra easily and then discarded them somewhere on the floor. You watched him closely. You could see him thinking, you could see all of the gears turning in his head. Every single time he used that big brain of his, he made a certain face that you found absolutely mesmerizing. You could always tell when he was really thinking; and this time you assumed he was carefully analyzing you and trying to make sure all of his moves were correct. His eyes finally met yours and for a moment he was still, reading you as you stared curiously up at him. Then he smiled sweetly and kissed your nose.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” He muttered as he went back to worked and had you lay back down.

“I-I…just-” You weren’t quite sure of what to say, at a loss for words. His mouth returned to your body, starting where he left off at your collar bones. He traveled lower towards your navel where he gave a playful kitten lick. You giggled softly as you watched him, a small shiver running through you. You could feel him smiling against your tummy the moment after your small bit of laughter. After reaching the waistband of your shorts, he raised his head to look at you again. His brown eyes poured with the love he had for you. He tugged the denim fabric down until they were completely off. Once you were completely bare, he focused his attention back on your body. He kissed your tummy again as he spread your legs. He settled in between them and then he continued his journey downward.

Once he finally reached your core he pressed a long kiss to the lips of your vagina. His eyes met yours once more, looking for any sign of discontent, but you had none. He looked back down and then pressed his tongue in between your folds, finally eliciting a sound other than laughter. You hummed softly in response, allowed him to spread your legs further. He gave a long lick this time, and then pressed his tongue against your clit. Your teeth clenched lightly; this time you were biting back a moan. He looked up at you, scanning you once more before he licked between your folds again.

“Don’t be shy, I’ve only done this a hundred times.” Namjoon teased before he went back down to work again.

“N-not…like this.” You sputtered as you felt the tip of his tongue pressing at your entrance. You whimpered softly, expecting him to enter, but he did not. He pulled his tongue back in and then settled his lips around your clit where he began suckling. Your breath hitched and then you moaned with pleasure. His hands rested on your legs where he began rubbing circles into your inner thighs.

“Namjoon..” You whimpered, your hand going down to tangle into his hair. His tongue slid out again, teasing the sensitive nub. You began squirming around uncomfortably, wishing very much for any kind of intercourse.

“Be still Babygirl.” You heard his low raspy voice and then you whined a little louder, arching your back. He scoffed quietly before he ran his tongue downward back to your entrance. Again he teased the sensitive area, eliciting a frustrated whine from you. After this, he finally pushed his tongue into you, pumping the muscle in and out and slurping up the juices that came with it. The perverted sounds, the sensations, it was already a lot for you. You moaned pleasurably at his skillful tongue, and during that entire time you couldn’t help but to thank your stars for blessing you with an intellectual rapper with a well trained tongue.

“Ah, fuck, Joon, I-I-..” Again you couldn’t get the words out that you wanted. Your grip tightened in his hair as you were slowly overwhelmed with the pleasure and only faced with the reality that this was just the beginning. You tilted your head back, your eyes closing as you took in the pleasure being given. Namjoon licked up your core again and then pressed his tongue flat against your tongue where he shook his head. You squeaked and then cried out, knowing you were close to your climax.

“J-Joonie I-I-” You tried to warn him but just before you could finish your sentence he pulled away and sat up, wiping his mouth. He looked down at you, watching your expression, seeing you lost from your denied release. He snickered softly and then pulled his shirt over his head, finally revealing his tone tan chest. You looked up at him again after processing what happened and then you pouted and swatted at him. “Why didn’t you let me cum!?” You demanded. He laughed at you and leaned down, kissing you chastely on the forehead.

“Because then it won’t be as good if I let you cum now, cutey.” He grinned down at you. “Joonie will make you feel good, I promise.” You watched him again with curiosity. You wished you didn’t make it so obvious, but what else  could you do? So you played along.

“Okay.” You said. You spread your legs as far as they would go and you purred. “Then do it already.”

Namjoon gaped for a second. He had been holding him self in for too long and he was just as needy as you were. He grunted and kicked his jeans off, but before he could get too ahead of himself he remembered he needed to go slow this time. You looked down hungrily at his aching member and you moaned at the thought of it finally ravishing you. “Goddamn, please Namjoon!” You whined impatiently. Namjoon smirked and spread his precum across his member as lubricant, and finally he pressed his tip against your entrance. He braced himself, settling his hands on either side of your head and finally he slowly pushed into you, burying himself deep inside of you. Both of you let out a mutual moan as he sheathed himself. Your hands snaked around his neck as his own hands moved to pull you into a strong embrace. Your eyes closed as your legs wrapped around his waist to keep him close. He began moving, delivering slow, long strokes. You clenched tightly around him, letting out a long whiny moan. “N-Namjoon.” You whimpered. His thrusts where strong and he managed to maintain his steady slow pace, wanting to be sure you felt every ounce of compassion he had for you. “F-fuck, I love you..so much.” He hissed. Before you could say anything he kissed you deeply on the lips as he continued his steady strokes. You moaned into his mouth. Even if you were going to say anything, all of your thoughts had dissipated and the only thing you could think of was Namjoon. Just him, his name, his warmth, the pleasure he gave. Him.

“Shit, you’re so tight.” He mumbled against your lips. You couldn’t help it. Your body wanted him more than anything. No, needed him. Your grip around him tightened and he sped up only a little; thrusting into you harder. You cried out. He, having to break the kiss. Your heart was racing like never before, your blood filled with heat, and your mind went blank.

“J-Joonie..” You whimpered. There was nothing else you could say. No other words could come to mind. Namjoon grunted deeply, moaning lowly into your ear. He ground against you after sheathing again. A long moan came from him again before he continued his strokes. “Babygirl, do you like this?” He whispered. “Is it good?” All you could do was hum, just barely able to nod your head in response. “S-so good.”

“Y/N, I love you. So much. I-” He was cut off when you were quickly coming up on your high. You whimpered and moaned needily, chasing for your climax as best as you could. You were spasaming around him so fast, Namjoon was reduced to nothing but grunts and groans.

“I-I..I”

You were struggling. Your hands fumbled until your nails dug into his back, clawing for dear life. Your vision blurred and you could no longer hear.

“I love you too!” You cried loudly. Finally you came, harder than you ever had before. Your entire body shook as your orgasm took over you. Namjoon held onto you tight. He was able to feel your entire body rack with the pleasure he was able to deliver. The spasming of your walls and the way you whimpered and whined was enough to send him over as well, and soon he came, releasing his hot white seed.

You nearly fainted, you were sure of that. Namjoon still and laid down on top of you. He was heavy but you could care less. You drew in a shaky deep breath and then you placed a kiss to the side of his cheek. “L-…Love me forever.” your whispered before shutting your eyes, sleep quickly taking over you.

Namjoon opened his eyes and looked up at you. He smiled tiredly and then rolled over. He pulled you tightly into his arms and then he kissed your cheek.

“Always.” He whispered. “Happy birthday baby.”