#I made this thinking it wouldn’t be this hard
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Drowned
siren!hyunjin x afab!reader
warnings: swearing, violence, mentions of drinking, descriptions of drowning, unprotected sex (do not), monster cock, fingering (f and m receiving), oral (f receiving), creampie
genre: pirate/siren AU, found family trope, fluff, monster (?) smut, a little bit of angst
word count: 8.2k
author's note: started thinking about merman hyunjin, wanted to write a little something, it got out of hand. voilá. seriously, this is the longest thing i've ever written so i'd really appreciate to hear what you think! please let me know if there's any mistakes or if i overlooked something <3 happy reading 💙
masterlist
divider by @firefly-graphics
For as long as you lived, the sea was your home. The salty wind in your hair, the water splashing against the sides of your parent’s ship and freedom in your heart. Never have you wanted for more, the crew and everything else that was on board was always enough.
Sure, every now and then you had to get rough with other pirates or relieve some rich folk of their valuables but regardless of that, you wouldn’t change your life for the world. You never had a worry on your mind except maybe what’s for dinner that day, enjoying a nice sunbath on the deck, messing with some of the lower standing crew members that were close to your heart or going fishing with your mother whenever you were docked on some harbor.
Today was no different. Maybe a little different, since your father had tasked you with checking out one of the local rich men’s houses. Your boots carried you to the wealthy district where you earned your share of people eyeing you with disdain but you didn’t mind, smiling toothily at them and waving which just left them perplexed by your friendliness.
You whistled lowly at the sight of the mansion, gold decorations shimmering on the façade, lush greenery surrounding the entire building.
Kind of impressive.
The fence was hopped easily and you found your way into the mansion. No one was home so you figured there was no point in trying to stay low. You scanned through most of the main rooms, snatching up anything that looked valuable enough to you. With your pockets and bag full, you strolled over to what seemed to be a room where whoever lived here kept all of their valuable paintings and other art finds.
You stood in front of one particularly impressive artwork. While others would surely admire the stroke pattern, the colors used or the fascinating woodwork on the frame, you simply ascertained that the painting was small enough to carry out and still be able to run with. So you grinned to yourself as you removed the painting from the wall and leisurely made your way out of the house again.
Your steps are hurried as you make your way back to the ship, signaling for the crew to get ready to leave the harbor.
“Halt! She’s a thief!”
Oh well. Took them long enough.
You broke out in a sprint, painting secured beneath your arm. Your father was already barking out orders, readying the ship to take off as soon as they can, while some of the local police is hot on your trail.
You giggled as you climbed onboard right as the ship began its movement towards the horizon. With big motions you waved to the people left behind, all of them fuming for having lost the race against you.
-
The island was no longer to be seen, your parents were proud and your little family had plenty of stuff to sell for the next dock. You couldn’t be happier.
To reward yourself for your hard work today, you decided to lounge about in the sun. The waves rocked you until you fell fast asleep.
So deeply asleep that you didn’t wake up when the outlook yelled about another ship approaching yours.
So deeply asleep that you only woke up when the first canonball tore through the flimsy wood of the ship you called home.
Your heart was beating erratically as you struggled to make sense of your surroundings, everyone onboard in a panicked hurry. Some men running around trying to fight off the opponents that were starting to invade your space, the others below deck firing back with whatever they had, some others trying to keep the rising water out of the ship, refusing to let it sink just like that.
You grabbed your own sword and jumped to your father’s side.
“Seems like you angered the wrong gentlemen this time around!” – he laughed as his sword clashed with another.
“It was your stupid idea!” – you countered, equally finding amusement in the familiar situation and laughing.
The fight seemed to be on your side for a moment, countless stuck-up lawmen falling into the harsh waters while your side held their numbers up. But not everything always goes the way you want it to, one misstep and everything can fall apart quickly. So when the blade slashed through your side, you sucked in a breath and stumbled backwards against the railing, a man twice your size giving you the last push you needed to tip over, the cold water enveloping your whole body.
You struggled to keep your head above the waters, gasping for air but breathing in more water than anything sustainable. Your body bumped into those of others that had met the same fate as you, making the entire process of trying to stay alive harder than it needed to be. The side of your torso ached with every movement and soon enough, the strength left your limbs as you slowly but surely sunk deeper into the depths of the sea, unaware of someone that observed your descent with curious eyes.
The first thing you notice when you come to your senses again is that you feel incredibly warm.
The second thing you notice is a pair of curious eyes staring down at you.
“Oh” – he moves out of your sight before you can properly take the rest of his appearance in but one thing is abundantly clear to you: pupils should not be shaped like his, nor should eyes be as yellow as his.
You sit upright as soon as you can, wincing at the sharp pain in your side. The pain is all but forgotten when you take in the otherworldly creature sitting timidly at the edge of a stone not far from you.
He is nervously picking at his fingers while gazing at you, the space between each finger connected by a thin membrane akin to some sea creatures you know. There are tiny little scales scattered around his skin that shimmer in various shades in the light, ranging from the deepest onyx, powdery sky blue, brilliant gold and pearl white. The most alarming thing about his body is the very obvious fish tail where his legs should be, decorated in the same colors as the rest of his scales with smaller, elegantly shaped fins on the sides of it. It seemed to be longer than whatever the stories made you picture in your mind. When your gaze wanders back up his body, taking note of how the scales fade into normal skin and just being scattered here and there, you notice the gills on each side of his neck, fluttering softly with each breath he takes. His impressively broad back had another line of fins across his spine. Finally settling your gaze on his face, framed by luscious black locks, you can see he has another set of large fins on the side of his head, probably protecting his ears. His eyes shine a shimmery yellow with a fitting cat-like pupil that’s slightly dilated as he’s taking your form in. A slight blush covers his cheeks, the miniscule fins along his cheekbones fluttering.
He is the most beautiful thing you have ever seen in your life.
When he opens his plush lips to say something, you can see his teeth are a set of fangs, his canines larger and sharper than the others which seem kind of blunt in comparison.
“Do you feel pain?” – his voice comes out shyly, an underlying trill accompanying the sound.
Suddenly, you remember you are supposed to be in pain, immediately clutching the side that was slashed during the fight but finding it neatly bandaged with algae and scraps of cloth. He must have taken care of you while you were unconscious.
Surprisingly, all that’s left is a dull pain that pulsates along your heartbeat, nothing too bad. As you tell him this, he seems pleased, a proud little smile on his lips.
“You are a pirate, yes?”
“Yeah. We got attacked and then…” – you trail off and look around.
You’re clearly on some shore but it doesn’t seem like any civilisation is nearby, the air devoid of any sounds that indicate humans are nearby, just the soft crashing of the waves, the wind in the trees and the calls of animals. There isn’t any harbor, no boats in sight, the beautiful creature sitting beside you the only sign of intelligent life.
A sigh leaves your lips, already wracking your brain for any ideas on how to get back to the mainland or contact your family. For a second earlier, you thought that you found your end as you stared into the creature’s eyes. So sure were you that what you saw in front of you must have been one of the legendary sirens that your mother always told you about. Creatures that lure in pirates and sailors alike with their beautiful appearance and mesmerising voices, only to drag them into the depths of the sea, killing them.
Whatever was in front of you, curiously holding up the painting that you stole, big eyes roaming over the faded paint, couldn’t be a man-killing siren for he was far too soft and gentle to be anything like those legends said he would be.
It was honestly kind of cute watching him take in the ruined painting, completely captivated by the swirling colors, his tail gently splashing in the water in quiet excitement.
He seemed to be no threat, so you let your guard down easily beside him.
“Do you have a name?” – you ask him finally, breaking his concentration on the painting, yet he doesn’t look away from it.
“Hyunjin.”
“Well, thank you, Hyunjin. For saving me. I’m y/n.”
The tips of his ear fins flick at your admission, yet he makes no move to look at you. His fingers, with claws retracted, gently glide over the messy colors and though the original painting is near unrecognisable, far too damaged by the tides to make anything out, Hyunjin seems to find a certain beauty in the destroyed artwork.
“Do you know who made this?” – he asks and there’s that trill in his voice again that makes you think his vocal chords must work differently to yours.
“Nope. Stole it from some rich guy, he didn’t really indicate the artist anywhere. I doubt he cared.”
Hyunjin frowns at that, finally putting the painting to the side and turning to you.
“What are you going to do now? I understand that this island is less than ideal for a human but I had to get you back on land as soon as possible. You would have died.”
“I know where my family was headed and if they survived that encounter, they’ll still sail towards Port Vement. I just have to figure out a way to get there” – you let your body fall back into the sand.
Hyunjin hums and even then, the little trill you’re slowly getting obsessed with accompanies the sound. You want to hear it again. You wonder if it would be there if he sang.
“I’ll help you. I’m the reason you’re in this situation, after all.”
-
The days passed in a slog. You were mainly concerned about finding a way off of the island while staying alive, the wound you nursed on your side healing too slow for your liking.
Hyunjin had been fantastic at keeping you company and ensuring you actually survived and stayed sane. He caught fish for you with his bare hands, showing it off proudly by raising his arm in the air and giving you a toothy grin from his place in the water as you watched him, your adoration growing for him with every fish caught.
You ate together and meal times were one of the few times where you had to realise, that Hyunjin was after all part animal with the way he tore into the fish, his fangs easily making short work of the seadweller.
When you were busy building a makeshift raft out of the driftwood that you found around the shore, he’d sunbathe on one of the nearby stones, his scales glistening and shimmering in the light. Your desire to touch them grew every time you stole a glance at the sleepy siren.
Sometimes, the two of you would just lay together, exhausted from the day. Hyunjin liked it when you told him stories of your adventures around the world but it seemed that he found particular joy in the stories that focused on your little pirate family.
You would tell him of Marnie, the bear-like man in charge of the kitchen, who you swear was the softest guy you had ever known. Everything he touched turned into a delicacy and his passion for good ingredients and cooking got even you excited to try your hand at making a dish, only to end up burning your hand and the meal tasting like it had gone bad a week ago, thus swiftly ending your career as a kitchen helper.
You would tell him of Val, the outlook who loves reading more than anything ever since your mother taught him. He keeps a little box full of books he procures from the towns you visit. Val doesn’t talk much but he’s generally good company and loves telling you about the plots of his novels.
You would tell him of Arlen, a tall scary-looking guy who was in charge of keeping all of your weapons sharp and battle-ready. Despite looking so fierce and battleworn, Arlen was quite the romantic, swooning here and there over the beauty of the world.
You would tell him of Marlo, who was with you ever since you were born for he was your father’s childhood friend. Marlo lies and talks a lot of bullshit all day long but that made him the greatest storyteller on board because he could exaggerate the hell out of the tales he told.
And finally, you would tell him of your parents, who fell in love when your father was just a scrawny lad robbing a bar blind with his crew of misfits. He swept her off her feet and promised her a future full of wealth and a lifetime of love in their little family.
It was a fair exchange, because Hyunjin, after a few days of only you entrusting stories to him, started telling you of his own life.
He was born in an alcove to two very loving parents when the weather just started changing, the water slowly warming up with each day passing, the sun more happy to be out and about. He was the only one of his clutch that survived, so he didn’t have any brothers or sisters.
When he was just a little fish, his parents got caught up in some kind of conflict between a group of sirens and, in order to protect their only son, gave their lives so he could swim away.
You noticed his voice came out strained, so you silently took his hand into yours in an effort to comfort him. It was your first time initiating touch with him and he accepted it gratefully, continuing on with his story.
“I was alone for quite a while, but my parents taught me well”, he said, “until I met a bunch of other sirens, all male, which was weird, since all the other sirens I had met during my life always had females with them for one reason or another. They were weird for that but what was even weirder is that… I stuck with them for a while and they started feeling like home.”
You nodded along to his words, your thumb caressing the back of his hand in comforting motions.
“You had your own little family, hm?”, you whisper and he nods.
“What happened to them?”, you ask cautiously, not wanting to push him too far in case he wasn’t ready to share that part of the story with you yet. His gills fluttered as he took in a shaky breath, his ear fins flapping nervously as his eyes find yours.
“There was a storm and we got seperated. I don’t know where they are.”
Hyunjin doesn’t share any more stories that night.
-
A few days into your new castaway life, you figure you should change or at least clean the bandages for your wound so it doesn’t get infected. Even after diligently checking through the supplies you gathered in your time here, there isn’t an awful lot of cloth amongst it.
You sigh and look down at your clothes, already mourning the fabric.
You trudge over to where Hyunjin was lounging about. In a way, you envy him for not having to wear proper clothing. Most of what he was wearing consisted of various seashells, fishing lines and other sea artefacts that he, or one of his friends, assembled to resemble necklaces, bracelets and decorations for his tail.
If he was human, he would be quite fashionable, you think.
“Hyunjin”, you whine and he cracks open one eye to look up at you.
“Can you use your claws to cut off some fabric from my clothes for new bandages?”
He mutters a quiet ‘sure’ and sits up, making grabby hands with his sharpened nails at you. You giggle at his antics and offer him your pantleg and he gently cuts off enough fabric to dress your wound with.
The next part is kind of awkward because last time you were unconscious and the situation was quite literally life-or-death. You both sit there awkwardly, Hyunjin still with the fabric in hand, not sure how and where to move. What was acceptable? Would you let him take care of you again now that you were fully conscious?
You were the first to break the awkward tension by lifting your shirt up.
“Help me, again?” – you choke out and Hyunjin feels like jumping into the water and swimming away as far as he can. He trills something, no words coming out of him, just cute little noises, his ear fins flicking nervously.
He scoots closer to you, the base of his tail settling against your knees and despite his scales looking so scratchy, it’s a smooth, silky feel against your skin.
The old bandages and algae are taken off with ease and Hyunjin curiously eyes your wound, checking if it needs to be cleaned or any other special care. Meanwhile you feel like dying, his careful eyes roaming over your middle feels weirdly intimate and you want to burst into a million pieces at his attention.
It’s not every day that you get the full attention of a man as beautiful as him. Even rarer that someone you feel attracted to genuinely wants to take care of you. Something stirs in your heart when Hyunjin’s fingers gently trace the outline of your wound, careful to not keep them too close.
“Is this okay?” – he asks when you slightly jump at his touch and you nod back at him in a daze.
He starts bandaging you up gently, occasionally letting his gaze flit up to your face, silently checking whether you were still okay with what was happening. His own neck starts gaining color when he notices how flustered you are by his ministrations and he quickly finishes up, making sure the bandage wasn’t too tight but still snug.
“Done” – he trills and quickly retracts his hands back to his own body.
On one hand you’re glad it’s over and you can let your body relax again, on the other, you wish he would have kept his hands on you just a little longer.
-
You’re finally able to complete a safe enough raft when Hyunjin finds the last piece of driftwood that seems stable enough to hold you. While you pack all the things you had gathered for a longer journey on sea, Hyunjin tests the durability of the raft by swimming a few paces out into the ocean and hops onto it.
It seems to pass his tests and he gives you a thumbs up before bringing it back.
“And you’re absolutely sure you can swim and pull this at the same time?” – you ask from your place on the raft for the nth time that day, the anxiety gnawing at your core that you’re tasking Hyunjin with something that would end up hurting him.
“Trust me a litte, I’ll be fine!” – he grins and it’s that smile you started to love so much, one where his eyes crinkle a little and remind you of the shape of the moon on some nights. It’s a smile that usually only comes out when he’s genuine, cackling about something he finds extremely funny or something you said to him makes him so happy he can’t hold himself back.
“Alright, fish boy, let’s go, then.”
And oh boy, he’s faster than you thought, pulling you two through the tides as if you weighed nothing to him. Maybe you didn’t. Maybe sirens were extremely strong and he simply never showcased it to you as he did with so many things.
You hold onto dear life and try to navigate him towards where you think was Port Vement.
Amidst the waves rocking your little raft, the excitement and anxiety at the thought of seeing your family again rises within your heart.
What if they never survived that attack?
What if something else happened to them and they never made it to the Port?
What if they never came to Port Vement in the first place?
Such thoughts had plagued your mind ever since you started planning to go after them, only momentarily silenced whenever Hyunjin piped up with something he wanted to ask you about ever curiously or whenever the siren popped into your field of vision, effectively ripping you out of your spiral.
It’s a moment of clarity, your chest constricting at the realisation that in these few days together, you really grew attached to your unlikely acquaintance. A realisation that forces a small part of your brain to wish that you could just stay with him instead of returning to your family. Because a returnal would mean that you would have to say goodbye to him and maybe never see him again, your worlds too different to be allowed to collide for too long.
You don’t talk a lot during your travels and when night eventually falls, Hyunjin is far too tired to keep up with idle conversations. His tail is gently curled around the raft as he rests his body on the wood beside you, slumbering peacefully as the waves rock you two in a soft but steady rhythm. Your hand finds its way into the soft tresses of his hair, your fingers carding through his locks in an effort to comfort and thank him for his efforts during the day.
That fall off your ship could have easily ended in your death. A deep cut in your side, the bloodloss and the strong tides would have killed you right then and there, slowly draining your strength until there was none left.
If Hyunjin didn’t decide to help you out of the kindness of his heart, that would have been it. He didn’t need to help you or stay by your side to ensure that you had food and were safe. Probably shouldn’t have helped you if he wanted to keep himself safe.
But he did anyway. And for that you were incredibly grateful, yet you didn’t have a proper chance to show him that and it made you feel guilty. So all you could do for the moment was ensure that he was healthy and offer him all the comfort he needed.
Surprisingly, the journey was more boring than you expected. There were no storms, no complications, barely any ships nearby that could’ve been trouble for a stray girl and her equally stray siren.
When you see Port Vement in the distance, you let out a yell that scares Hyunjin so much he momentarily stops swimming to look back at you in horror.
“Port Vement, Hyunjin! We made it! You did it!!” – you excitedly celebrate and crawl forward on your raft to take him into your arms tightly. Hyunjin startles at your sudden touch but relaxes into your hold, his webbed fingers coming up to pat your back.
“I promise you, I’m gonna buy you as much food as you want, whatever you want, I’ll make it possible! There’s not enough ways in the world to thank you” – you sob into his shoulder, suddenly emotional over the whole ordeal.
He really doesn’t like it that you’re crying but having you in his arms feels so right, so comforting to his heart that he physically feels his feelings for you click into place, finally slotting into the spaces where they belonged.
“Let’s get you out of the water, then” – he trills shyly and you sniff as you settle back onto the raft so Hyunjin can pull you the last few meters.
With shaky legs you finally stand on solid ground again.
Port Vement had always been something of a safe haven for your family so it felt good to be back somewhere familiar. You tell Hyunjin you’re gonna check out the docks to see if your family’s ship is there and he promises you he’ll stay nearby watching over you in case something happened.
Your mind races as you hurry to the docks, all the questions bubbling up again that spike your anxiety. The uneven road makes you trip and bump into people passing you by but you don’t much care for their complaints as you make your way down the streets. Your heart is beating fast inside your ribs, almost painfully so, making you feel like you’re drowning again.
Everything comes to a halt around you as all your fears slip clean off your shoulders when you take in the glory that is your family’s ship. You want to break down and cry now that you finally know they’re here and safe but you knock some sense into yourself as you wrack your brain for possible locations they could’ve fled to in this town.
There were several shops and fishermen around trying to sell their wares but you doubt you’d find one of them there, especially with the sun setting already. Then your eyes stop at a shield hanging from one of the big wooden doors around you.
A tavern.
Bingo.
You break out into a sprint again, ripping the door open and startling several of the guests. Ignoring all of their complaints is easy when your eyes zero in on one table in the far back where your father is cackling obnoxiously loud, probably about some lame joke Marlo made.
“Dad!” – you yell and hurry over to their table. When they notice you, everyone’s eyes turn as big as saucers and the table almost topples over with the force of everyone suddenly standing up, trying to get to you first.
This time you really cry when the first pair of arms encircles you, soon to be followed by countless more, the lot of you just ending up in a big cuddle pile.
“You don’t know how much I missed you” – you cry and everyone shares your sentiment.
“We thought you died!”
“How did you survive that?!”
“Where have you been this entire time?!”
“How did you get to this island?!”
You answer all of their questions throughout the evening and in-between beers. For a moment, you think whether to tell them about Hyunjin’s existence or to obscure it to keep him safe in case someone else was listening in on your conversation. You settle on whispering it to your parents while the others are busy getting shitfaced. You’re your parents are surprised would be an understatement and they don’t believe you at first, thinking you might have taken a hit to your head or that you started to hallucinate in your absence.
Your insistence on the truthfulness of your story makes them eventually back down and give in.
“I don’t want to do anything he doesn’t want to, so I don’t know if you’ll ever meet him but… I just wanted you to know that my survival was thanks to a kind soul” – you mumble to them and your own statement makes you suddenly go rigid.
In your revery and celebration you totally forgot that Hyunjin was waiting for you.
You excuse yourself hastily, only your parents knowing the real reason why you would suddenly leave, and run outside to where you had last seen him. New anxieties swirl in your head. What if he left? What if that was it and you never got to say a proper goodbye to him? Thank him for what he’s done?
The coast was entirely clear so you called out to him in the dark.
“Hyunjin?”
Silence.
“Hyunjin? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you wait for so long!”
The waves softly crash against the shores.
“My parents know about you, I hope that was fine? They’re very grateful, just like I am!”
The sounds of drunken hollering from the town reach your ears but thankfully they’re quiet, too far away to be a concern.
“Please don’t tell me you left…” – your voice gets quieter with each time you call out to him.
That’s when you spot something in the water. Two glowing orbs watching you from beneath the water. A relieved sigh escapes your lungs and your eyes sting, marking the fourth time you want to cry today.
You carefully step to the edge of the water and crouch down to place your hand into the sea. There’s a few moments before the yellow glow starts gliding through the water towards you and something suddenly takes your hand into theirs.
Hyunjin’s head peeks out of the water and you can see him pout.
“I thought you left me for good” – he mumbles into the water and despite his overly dramatic pout, you know he means it.
“I really am sorry… I got carried away after seeing my family again but I should have at least given you a sign or something instead of letting you wait without knowing what’s going on” – you caress his cheek, letting your thumb graze over the miniscule fins protruding from his cheekbones and Hyunjin lets out a soft trill.
“I was scared” – he doesn’t look you in the eyes anymore after his admission and your heart breaks.
“Don’t leave me, you’re all I have” – he sounds so broken, so different from the boy that kept giggling over the dumbest things you told him.
“Hyunjin…”
The water splashes around him when he pushes his body up on the stone, tail flailing behind him. When his hands find purchase on your shoulders, his retracted nails digging into your flesh, you half think he is going to live up to the siren stereotypes and drag you into the depths, but instead, his plush lips crash into yours haphazardly.
For a moment you’re taken aback, the force of the kiss so sudden, but your heart swells when your mind finally catches up to what was happening, your lips starting to move against his.
He tastes salty and a bit fishy, you can feel his fangs when you push your lips against his. Hyunjin is in a constant battle with himself of wanting to savor this and wanting to rush to the next part. His body wins and he timidly licks your lips, requesting you to open your mouth for him.
As you two kiss, pouring every amount of yearning and love into it, your arms circle around his small waist, pulling him further against your body. A pleased trill escapes his lips and you smile against him, licking excitedly into his mouth. You notice his tongue is different from yours, forked at the end and longer overall. Your tongue catches a few times on the many little fangs in his mouth but you don’t mind. Right now, you’re on cloud nine.
“The feelings I have in my chest are too big to put into words” – he says breathlessly when you part, foreheads touching.
“Can you show them to me?”
Hyunjin nearly sobs at your question, his mind pushing him to do a million things at the same time. How does one put their love into actions properly? How could he possibly show you how much you grew to mean to him within the days you spent together with just one action?
The rest of his tail lifts out of the water and envelops you, his arms pushing you to rest your head against his chest as he cradles you.
“My mother used to hold me like this” – he begins quietly, his heart thumping loudly against your ear.
“She said that as long as her heart was beating in her chest and I could hear it like this, I wouldn’t have to worry about anything. And even long after the beating of her heart faded out, I could remember it and be sure that for as long as she lived, her heart was beating for me” – he hugs you tighter against his chest, his cheek resting atop your head.
The two of you stay like this for a while, just breathing with each other, feeling each other’s skin. You give little kisses to his chest, finally getting to touch his scales like you wanted to the moment you met him.
“I know it’s not a replacement for what you lost, but for the time being until we find your friends again, if you wanted to, I could probably convince the others to take you with us, you know.”
“You would?”
“Of course I would, you dummy”, you giggle and poke his side and he lets out a trill again, much to your joy.
“My parents already know about you and even though a part of them probably thinks their daughter has lost it, they would accept you without thought. You saved me and showed me more kindness than another human might in a situation like this, you’re probably already part of the crew in their heads.”
Hyunjin sobs and hugs you even tighter to his body, his tail wrapping protectively around your legs.
In the quiet of the night, you two whisper about better tomorrows and a future filled with love to each other.
You don’t return to your family until morning.
-
The introduction between Hyunjin and your family went as well as you could have hoped. While most of them were weary at first, scared, that he was going to turn on them and do siren things to them, they accepted him after seeing that he was equally as shy about meeting them. Plus, they couldn’t argue with you for long when you kept insisting that he was the only reason you were alive right now.
The crew went about loading and repairing the ship from the damages it endured during the battle, meaning that you weren’t going to leave this place for a few days at least. Hyunjin curiously watched the hustle and bustle from a short distance away, not wanting to be in the way or risking getting seen by locals who didn’t know about him.
Your father approaches you on the last day of repairs, asking you to check out a new little addition to the pirate ship, one that has you gasping in happiness.
They decided to add a small, silly lift and a bunch of nets that were sturdy enough to hold Hyunjin on the side of the ship. That way, he could either use the lift with the help of someone on board or climb his way on deck using the nets. With an addition like this you were absolutely sure that Hyunjin was now part of the family and with an excited skip in your step you run to tell him about it.
He seems just as excited about it, his ear fins flickering happily and a huge grin on his face. Just one issue.
“Do you…uhm, have a bucket of water or something for me to sit in? I’m going to dry out otherwise.”
You scratch your head in thought. You kind of forgot that he needs water to survive, never having seen him outside of it for long.
“We got that covered, lad!”, Marnie yells, scaring both of you, as he unloads the last ingredients for the kitchen on deck.
“Near the spot where our dear y/n always sunbathes we put up a big tub already filled with salty sea water for ye!”
Hyunjin’s eyes glitter in joy and he claps his hands together excitedly.
“y/n! Help me up! I’ve always wanted to see what it’s like to be on a big ship like this!”
You chuckle and run on board towards the lift, and with little trouble you get the siren on board. A little more physical effort from both of you is needed to get Hyunjin across the deck and into the tub but when his cute little fish butt hits the water the two of you let out a pleased sigh.
“This is great!” – he trills excitedly, not knowing where to look first.
As Hyunjin takes in all the sights and the difference in height, you take the opportunity to observe the rest of the ship, a sense of calm settling in your chest at the thought of having both your family back and Hyunjin by your side.
-
Travelling with a siren by your side proves to be quite advantageous. The fishing takes half the time with Hyunjin speeding through the nearby waters and snatching up any fish big and beautiful enough to be considered meal-worthy by Marnie while your father desperately tries to do it the old-fashioned way only to lose to the siren every time.
To make up for every defeat, Hyunjin’s second job as a pirate is scouting ahead of your ship to make sure you’re not running into any law enforcement or other pirates that could prove dangerous.
He seems to love being needed for specific tasks.
The next time the opportunity arises for your crew to steal from a rich guy, Arlen casually takes a painting off the wall to offer it to Hyunjin later. He tries to brush it off as not a big deal, yet he can’t escape getting pulled into a big hug as Hyunjin thanks him wholeheartedly.
Arlen would never admit it to anyone but he teared up a bit at the genuine excitement bubbling off the siren just because he gave him a little gift.
The others soon also realised Hyunjin’s love for art so it escalated into something of a tradition for any crewmember to always bring back something from the world of art for their new fish buddy.
-
Today was one of the boring days, the entire crew on land for their business endeavors. The ship wasn’t docked as usual, a short distance away from land so they had to use the row boats to get to their destination. That left Hyunjin and you alone on the boat, lounging about in the sun. He let one arm lazily dangle outside of his tub to hold your hand with.
You suddenly realise that with the entire crew gone, probably until the next day, you could finally get some much needed kisses in. Ever since you took off from Port Vement, Hyunjin and you had to abstain from too much physical contact since you didn’t want to scare your parents with both bringing a real siren to the crew and explaining that he might be their new son-in-law.
Hyunjin cracks his eyes open when he feels your hand caressing his cheek. Without warning, you press a kiss to his lips and he feels like bursting at the seams, after being deprived of your loving touch for so long. It was just the start of your relationship and he immediately had to hold himself back from all the physical affections he wanted to give you. It was kind of unfair.
All the more reason for him to meet your kiss with as much fervor as he could muster. The miniscule fins on his cheekbones tickle you when you deepen the kiss, your tongue gliding over his forked one. Your heart beats erratically at your chest at you finally being able to kiss him again, your desperation transferring over to your movements being overly eager, accidentally knocking your teeth together but Hyunjin doesn’t seem to mind. On the contrary, it seems to spur him on even more, his hand finding its place on your waist, squeezing your flesh rhythmically.
You decide to be bold and lift your body in the tub, your legs on each side of his tail. Hyunjin looks up at you with an open mouth and big, glazed over eyes, clearly startled.
“Your clothes…”
“Forget about them, Hyune.”
And you descend back on him, your lips clashing with his. Your fingertips graze his ear fins and he lets out a high trill at the back of his throat. They must be sensitive. You store that knowledge in the back of your head for later.
Hyunjin is restless, unsure of where he’s allowed to touch, if he’s supposed to just trust his instincts, let his body do whatever it wanted. You were clearly just doing whatever came to your mind, grinding your core into his tail and letting out small whimpers against his lips that drove him crazy. He needed to know, so he gently pushes you away from him.
“Are you sure?”
You look at him dazed and it seems to take a second before his question registers in your head.
“More than sure. Do whatever feels right, Hyune.”
That about does it for him. His body presses into yours as he attaches his lips on your neck, sucking and peppering it with kisses. Your hands glide over the many fins along his spine, lightly scratching at the base of them and earning another trill from him. Your shirt is discarded haphazardly and thrown somewhere nearby the tub, leaving you bare in front of him. His curious eyes roam hungrily over your chest, a hand coming up to cup your breast experimentally.
“Where can I touch you?” – you breathe against him and Hyunjin suddenly grows shy. A red blush starts to creep up on his neck but he takes one of your hands into his regardless and places it on a specific part on the front of his tail.
“You… you know my ear fins are sensitive and the top of my body works similar to a human’s but, uhm… this is, you know…” – he stammers as you press your fingers into his scales gently. A small slit runs horizontally up his tail between his scales and in a burst of curiosity, you press your fingers inside, causing Hyunjin to throw his head back against the tub and let out a long moan.
“I see” – you tell him and continue to lightly press your fingers against his slippery walls. Your ministrations have him writhing and squirming underneath you, letting out small wanton moans mixed with trills.
Something soon pushes your fingers away and you take a moment to look at the mess Hyunjin had become while you were busy playing with him. He already looked so fucked out, his eyes glossy and glazed over, his hair falling around him messily like a crown, his chest heaving as he looked up at you.
He still was the prettiest thing you ever saw.
“y/n… please…” – he tugs at your pants and you realise you’re still completely dressed from the waist down. You hastily step out of the tub to get rid of the last few offending garments, bearing yourself entirely to him. As you step back in, you see what was pushing against your fingers just a moment ago.
That makes everything a little easier to figure out, as two cocks, similar in color to his tail, protrude from the slit, one a little bit larger than the other. But before you can touch him again, he urges you to sit on the edge of the wooden tub, eager to get his mouth on you. His forked tongue delves between your folds, experimentally licking up and down before focusing its attack entirely on your clit as he suckles.
Your hand tangles itself into his luscious hair, keeping him in place. The effort was kind of in vain because Hyunjin would rather die than part from you at this moment, greedily licking up your juices just to hear more of those melodic moans spilling from your lips. Just as much as you grew obsessed with his fascinating voice and trills, he grew to love your voice the same way.
Carefully, with retracted claws, one of his long fingers prods at your entrance before slipping in until the membrane stopped it from going any further.
“You’re doing so well…” – you praise him and earn a trill, your hands starting to massage his ear fins to give some of the pleasure back.
His ministrations soon bring you to your first climax and leave both of you panting and wanting for more.
Hyunjin eases you back into the tub to hover over his crotch. He gently takes the bigger one of his cocks into his hand, hissing at the contact after going for so long with no touches, and angles it towards your entrance for you to sink down on.
You both moan as you sink down to the hilt, his smaller cock nestling directly against your clit. Time stands seemingly still as you get used to the unusual stretch.
“You okay?” – Hyunjin whispers and soothingly rubs your lower back, his cold hands soothing against your burning flesh. You nod at him, letting your body fall against his, chest against chest, your arms circling around his waist as your face buries itself into his neck.
“Can you move?”
Hyunjin trills and obeys your command without thought, moving his hips in slow motions, his cock dragging deliciously against your walls. The extra stimulation from his smaller cock against your front makes you whine into his neck which you pepper with kisses, his gills fluttering at the caress of your lips.
“You feel so good…” – Hyunjin all but whimpers, his hands finding purchase on your hips to move you against him. You hug his chest tighter as you feel your orgasm build up a second time.
“Can I…uhm-“
“Do whatever you want, Hyune. Please.”
You feel him kiss the crown of your head and his strong tail bracing itself against the wooden tub before his pace gets rougher and faster, water beginning to slosh out at the sides. The drag of his two cocks against you is too much for you, your cunt clenching around him as you come with a strained moan into his chest.
“Ah… I love you, y/n. I love you, I really do. Where do I-“
“Inside.”
“Really?”
“I want all of you, Hyunjin.”
You lift up and take his face between your hands to look at him as his hips stutter into you in an uneven rhythm until you feel his cum filling you up. That trill accompanies his voice even as he comes. He looks beautiful, his eyes full of adoration, his lips slightly apart as he comes down from his high slowly.
You two hold onto each other, just basking in eachother’s closeness for a while before his cock slips out of you, retracting back into his slit now that it’s all over and no longer needed.
“I love you, too, by the way.”
And Hyunjin couldn’t be happier, his ear fins flapping happily as he nuzzles his face further into your hair.
-
You do eventually tell your parents about the relationship between you and Hyunjin and although they seem extremely hesitant at first, they figure they can’t really do anything to stop you from pursuing him with the way he’s bonded to you.
The crew eventually returns to Port Vement to stay there for a few days and Hyunjin and you find yourselves on the same part of the shore where your relationship started taking a turn.
You both lounge about beneath the stars, you tucked carefully into his chest. Originally you were scared that Hyunjin and your world were too different for this to go well but you found that despite him being a sea dweller and kind of a menace sometimes, that the two of you are a better fit than you expected.
When you want to tell him another story from your childhood for old time’s sake, you find him already fast asleep in the sand next to you. You smile and kiss the corner of his mouth before settling back against his chest.
Whatever battles lie ahead, you’re sure Hyunjin would pull you from the depths again and again and anyone daring to attack him for what he was would face your entire crews wrath.
As long as your hearts beat, they beat for eachother, you’re sure of that.
-
taglist: @jeonginsleftcheek
#hyunjin x reader#hwang hyunjin x reader#stray kids x reader#skz x reader#hyunjin#hwang hyunjin#stray kids#skz#hyunjin fluff#siren!hyunjin#hyunjin smut#hyunjin scenarios#hyunjin imagines#hyunjin x you#hyunjin x y/n#stray kids fluff#stray kids smut#skz fluff#skz smut
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ㅤ ㅤ ⠀ꕀ⠀𝆹⠀⠀ׄ⠀⠀ִ⠀ worthless talking ⠀ּ ּ ✧
Arguments with various characters
S1! jinx , S2! vi , S2! caitlyn , and ekko x fem! reader
arguing , mention of having a crush ( vi ) , hurt/no comfort , cursing , mentions of marriage ( caitlyn ) , drinking ( vi ) , mention of reader working in the brothel ( not prostitute ( vi ) ) , suspected cheating ( caitlyn ) , injured reader ( ekko )
not proofread or requested
JINX
arguments with her are usually light and can easily be dismissed or solved quickly but this is very different. silco has been pressuring her as of late about her weapon for the hex gemstone; which has been stressing her out and getting more irritated by everything little thing. “jinx baby?” you spoke softly, trying to not make her anymore irritated. “yes toots?” she frantically looking back and forth at her parts and blueprints for her fishbones, “are you doing okay? do you eat?”
she shrugged her shoulders, continuing to screw the screws in. you silently gulped and walked closer to her. “listen baby…can you take a break or something? i don’t remember the last time you slept or even eat and—” “shut up.” you immediately looked her way like you misheard her. “i-im sorry what..?” she kissed her teeth, “ i said shut up! all you ever do is nag and nag around me! do ever shut up? i’m trying to work so i can hurry up and finish this project, but no you just can’t seem to leave me alone while you’re—” she stops mid sentence, looking to see where you were last standing, “y/n?” she asked to absolutely nothing. she rolled her eyes, not bothering to think about you anymore, too focused on the hexgem project.
walking through the streets of Zaun, tears blurring your vision as you do your best to wipe them away but if anything you made your mind clear as day in Piltover; she doesn’t need you there anymore. continuing to walk through the lanes until you reached your home.
VI
pitfights. you hate no—loath them. so imagine your reaction to hearing that your crush becamea pitfighter after that massive fall out with the stupid top side girl. you watched as a friend of hers drag her up the stairs then she starts pushing him off and telling him to fuck off. you watch as the friend just walked away; already tired of her bullshit.
you breathe, mentally preparing yourself and your lecture of what you want to say as you head up the stairs slowly until you reached the door. out of curiosity, you reached for the doorknob, and its unlocked. ‘of course this idiot wouldn’t lock the door.’ you thought, twisting it and slowly pushing the door, seeing vi collapsed on the bed but still awake. you clear your throat loudly, catching her attention as you stand close to the now closed door. “vi.” your voice cautious but fed up. watching her destroy herself over a top side is so pathetic, even jinx powder would laugh in her face. vi groaned tiredly, “can’t seem to catch a fucking break anymore.”
“fuck a break! what do you think you’re doing?!” you wave your hand around, as you often talk with your hands. “what the hell are you talking about…!?” vi retorted back. “look around you vi, and your hair! your outfit! you’re a damn pitfighter.” you pointed at everything you mentioned, “why?! is it because of that fall out you had with that stupid top side girl..?!” vi abruptly gets up and stands in front of you. the smell of strong beer and whiskey clog your nose, in her breath, her clothes, everywhere, “don’t you dare bring her up.” you scoffed, “why not? she treats you like shit but now you’re a floor licking puppy for her..?” you stare at her, raised eyebrow, “at least she was better than you in many ways than one.” “excuse me?” “get the fuck out y/n. go back to being a fucking prostitute or something.” “i’m not a prosti—” she punched the wall next to your head, you flinch, hard. “out.” her voice threatening. your hands and feet quickly move as you open the door and fumble out of the apartment was vi was was.
CAITLYN
a lot has happened in a short amount of time, well, caitlyn proposed to you, then jinx blew up the council and killed her mother, then your fiancée became a damn Dictator and has been worked and training nonstop with Ambessa, and you’re starting to worry. she has been looking burned out a lot more and tired to even notice you sitting next to her on her desk as she stresses over paperwork.
“dear?” you twirled your finger around her loose hair. she jumps a bit, snapping out her thoughts and looking up to see her fiancée, you, “sorry darling, do you need something?” she fidgets with her pen and fingers, you smile at her weakly, “your dinner is cold.” you point to the cold dinner plate, nothing eaten on the side table next to her. caitlyn sighs heavily. “right, i apologize my dear, ill…make sure to eat.” “this is the fourth time dear. you can’t be a commander with zero energy.” you cross your arms over your chest, “i know know i’m just” “i’m starting to think ambessa was a bad idea again. i worried about all this pressure and process. like especially after your mother died, this isn’t good..” caitlyn’s fist banged against the desk, stopping you mid sentence.
“i don’t need your pity or concerns right now.” you stare at her, confused. “what are you talking about right now dear?” “i’m saying you talk too damn much.” she stood up, the chair scratches against the floor and walks away from the desk, “where are you going?” you asked while sliding off the desk, “out. i need some fresh air.” you tilt your head to the side and keep your arms crossed, “fresh air? or maddie?” the blued hair commander stopped dead in her tracks, “what…what did you just say?” you scoffed, as you walked past her, bumping her shoulder. you open the door, revealing maddie with paper works in her hands, “i’ll take my leave.”
EKKO
patrolling the area around the safe area, but your mind consumed with the thoughts of your boyfriend, he’s starting to overworking again. and that’s pissing you off. months of you guys dating and he still doesn’t get the memo. you sat on top of the tunnel entrance towards the hideout. staring up at the stars, wishing ekko was here with you.
suddenly, you feel a long cold metal jabbed into your side. you immediately clutch it to stop it from entering further until the culprit kicked you in the back, causing you to roll off the top and your body thudding against the cold concrete then you saw black. you wake up, the knife removed and you’re wrapped in bandages around your stomach and your arm is in a cast. your eyes adjust to the light shining down upon you, you wince as a headache rises and you hear muffled sounds of someone screaming your name. once your mind finally adjusts to everything, you hear ekko,
“hey hey hey! firebug! what happened?” his hands placing everywhere patting you down. you wince again, “ekko…that hurts..” you fully open your eyes. “what happened? why did someone find you outside of the base, bleeding out?” he raised his voice, not scary but scared. “i…i was patrolling around the entrance and—” “patrolling? didn’t i say you’re not allowed to patrol unless i’m there?” his voice switch to low. “i can take care of myself ekko.” he gritted his teeth, “well clearly you can not! look at you now! you don’t ever listen huh?” he started pacing back and forth, “it’s like you’re deaf or something, i said no! and you do the entire fucking opposite!” he grabs his mask and hoverboard, stops to say something but rejected that idea and just left.
ekko was so hard to do ngl cause what has he done for to cause an argument🧍♀️and you notice how short-ish jinx is? yea cause i can never actually be mad at jinx.
©︎ A M A T E R A S U. all rights reserved. please don't plazarize, copy, or steal any of my works without my permission, thank you !
#⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀𓏲࣪ ִֶָ ︎ִֶָ amastarxoxo 𖤐 .#⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀₊ ˚ works ꒰꒰⠀☆⠀꒱꒱#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane x reader#arcane jinx#arcane vi#arcane ekko#arcane caitlyn#jinx x reader#jinx x y/n#jinx x you#vi x reader#vi x you#vi x y/n#caitlyn x reader#caitlyn x you#caitlyn x y/n#ekko x reader#ekko x you#ekko x y/n#jinx x fem!reader#vi x fem reader#caitlyn x fem reader#ekko x fem!reader
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WANNA BE YOURS ’ JJ MAYBANK.
summary: jj’s been avoiding you after your break up with john b , but not for the reason you think.
request from prompt list: “i can’t stay away from you.”
When you think back to your relationship with John B , you aren’t sure when it stopped being meaningful.
Of course the relationship had its moments. The ones that you could look back on and smile , cherish the memory. But it was different. Because you didn’t look back on those memories and feel sad. You didn’t cry that they were fleeting. You didn’t miss it.
It was more of a grateful feeling. A feeling of fulfillment and enjoyment. But not sad.
In the end , the both of you felt it. That connection wasn’t there. The relationship wasn’t growing. You weren’t falling in love with eachother , more so , falling into a friendship that the both of you were scared to let go.
He had become your person and vice versa. The comfort the both of you had gotten from eachother , how honest and vunerable the two of you were able to be was something special.
But the relationship ran its course and John B admitted that he had started developing feelings for Sarah Cameron.
You weren’t mad at him or upset. He cried , feeling ashamed and scared of what it meant: you held his hand , brushed his face and encouraged him to explore it.
Breaking the news to your friends were the hardest part. Pope and Kiara were all knowing , especially Pope who you had confided in once before. They were supportive , and promised that nothing would change in the Pogue’s dynamic.
JJ on the other hand , he looked like a deer in headlights. He fidgeted alot , kept glancing up at you to study your face. JJ could tell that you didn’t look upset and he wasn’t sure what that meant. He wanted to yell at John B , push him and curse him for taking something as beautiful as you for granted.
But he couldn’t.
In fact , he couldn’t even face you.
JJ had always been taken with you. Since the moment he met you on the beach , everything about you just left him speechless. He though you were the most beautiful girl he had ever seen and he remembered how he gushed to Pope about you , ranting and raving about the girl he met.
Imagine his surprise when you showed up at the Chateau two days later next to John B— grinning up at him with stars in your eyes. He was deflated. Hurt. But he couldn’t blame anyone but himself for not making a move that night.
For two years he watched you and John B be together. And in those two years he had gotten to know you. All of you. That didn’t help. He thought the feelings he had for you would disappear. Girl after girl came into his life until he realized , he looked for you in every girl he met.
Although it was hard for him and it hurt him to slowly fall in love with you while you were seemingly falling in love for his bestfriend , it was easier for him to accept the fact you were off limits because you were taken by said bestfriend. Now that you were single , free and John B was running off with the Kook Princess , JJ wasn’t confident that he could just. . . not make a move , not confess everything he had pent up all these years.
But God , did he love you.
JJ had made it a point to avoid you. Any time he saw you at the Wreck , he ducked and hoped you hadn’t seen him. When you were invited to the Chateau or to the marsh , JJ always found some excuse to give so he wouldn’t be there. So he wouldn’t have to see you.
It was killing him on the inside. He was itching to see you again. To finally touch you , feel you , be yours. But he was afraid. Afraid of rejection , how it would to his friends , how John B would feel especially.
It was too messy and he couldn’t do it.
He couldn’t.
Eventually you had noticed JJ’s sudden change in behavior.
“Is it just me or does he like , suddenly hate me?” You mentioned to Kiara while the two of you sunbathed , JJ affectively avoiding you by staying in the water.
Kiara scoffed. “I wouldn’t say hate.”
You were confused by what she meant.
But days turned into weeks , and you couldn’t take it anymore. You missed him. It made you feel like he blamed you for the break up with John B or he resented you for whatever reason.
Your knuckles rapped on the door to his room where you knew he was staying in John B’s hallway. The other Pogue’s went surfing and told you JJ wasn’t coming because he was sick.
You finally had enough.
“JJ freaking Maybank! I know you’re in there so open up the damn door.” You yelled through the wood loudly , a fixated look on your face.
Nobody answered and you continued knocking on the door. “JJ! What the hell is your problem with me?” Your voice was just as loud. But after minutes of silence , you stopped knocking. Suddenly you felt all of your anger disappear. You felt small , and for some reason your chest began to hurt.
“JJ. . .” the anger was all gone , now your voice was soft and sad. Cracking at the end of his name. “Why won’t you talk to me?”
As if JJ’s own heart broke at the sound of your voice , he sighed heavily and got up from his place on the bed. The door flung open and in front of you stood a disheveled JJ. His hair was a mess , there were bags under his eyes and you could tell he had been crying. “I can’t stay away from you—”
“Really? Because it seems like that’s all you’ve been doing these past couple weeks is staying away from me.”
“I can’t stay away from you but I have to.” JJ finished his sentence. Scratching the back of his neck , he refused to meet your eyes. “I just need some time.”
You blinked confused. Your heart squeezing. “Are you mad at me? What did I do? Is this about John B?”
JJ groaned. “This isn’t about John B! Nothing about this is about John B right now.”
He snapped at you and it took you aback. Your eyes widened , not expecting that from him. It made you frown and you took a step closer to him. “JJ please. . . tell me what’s going on.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“Because I just— because I can’t.”
“You can’t or you won’t?”
“I love you.” JJ blurted. Now he was fully looking at you. “Okay? I love you. Not in the friend way. Not in a Pogue way. The in love with you way—” JJ suddenly felt the world lift off of his shoulders. It all started coming out like word vomit and he couldn’t stop it , but he didn’t want to either. “I love the way your hair gets all knotted up in the saltwater and it takes you hours to comb it out. I love that you wake up every morning and eat the same exact breakfast and makes sure everyone else in the house eats before they leave. I love that you love the animals and you care about nature. I even like you stupid little romance books that I pretend I hate hearing about when secretly I wish we were in our own love story. . .” he took a deep breath.
“I’ve loved you since the moment I met you , sweetheart and I’m trying to make it go away but it’s not.”
You were stunned. It all hit you at once and you stared. Mouth agape , eyes wide , and your cheeks flushed pink. It was the sweetest confession you had ever gotten , and the way JJ looked at you like you were the only girl in the world only added to the butterflies now swarming in your stomach.
“Why did you—” you stuttered , trying to figure out the words to say. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Would it have changed anything?” JJ said defeated.
“It would have changed everything.” You admitted.
You weren’t sure what was going to happen now or how to navigate the news. Though you did know that something changed. It would forever be changed.
And you were okay with that.
#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank imagine#jj maybank#outer banks#jj maybank fanfiction#jj maybank fluff#jj maybank outer banks#jj maybank angst#dialogue prompt#prompt request#obx jj x reader#obx imagine#obx jj#jj obx
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training partners (pt. 12)
summary: without another word from jack, you and hugh continue your relationship without any issue or distraction. filming comes close to an end and there's one scene that hugh needs your assistance with. pairing: hugh jackman x fem!reader warnings: smut (18+, mdni), lots of oil (duh, someone's gotta lube hugh up for that end scene), dirty talk, teasing, sex in hugh's trailer, oral - f & m receiving, unprotected p in v, swallowing, missionary, hugh covers your mouth (to keep you quiet), implied age gap (hugh is 55, reader is in late 20s-early 30s), no use of y/n. word count: 3.6k a/n: ok, this is complete filth lol. i had to write something about this scene because when hugh said that there were people whose sole job was to lube him up??? well, let's just say my mind went places lol. hope y'all enjoy! (needed some good fluff / smut before we get back into the angst hehe) as always, this is purely fictional! i mean no disrespect to hugh jackman. prev part.
Filming continues and you’re grateful that Jack hasn’t tried to reach out to you nor does he try to look for you either. Knowing that he got the hint that you no longer are giving him control of your life, it gives you relief. You feel like you can finally breathe again, can finally move forward with your life, with Hugh.
Without worrying about Jack coming back, you’re able to get back to enjoying your day-to-day responsibilities of continuing to take photographs on set of the movie. Every day, you wake up feeling immensely grateful for Hugh, Ryan, and Shawn for giving you this opportunity. While you normally take photographs of couples who have recently gotten engaged and have occasionally worked a small wedding, being an on-set photographer and capturing behind the scenes content is so much more enjoyable. It gives you a glimpse of how movies are made, shows you the passion and dedication of each cast and crew member.
But Hugh… you had always been a fan of his work and being able to see him in his element left you speechless every time. The way he’s able to switch into character so easily and become Logan Howlett - a character that you’ve always loved.
Throughout filming, you’re just in awe of everyone on set and to be able to see the movie unfold right before your eyes is an experience that you’re sure will only happen once in a lifetime.
And as the end of filming fast approaches, you embrace every second of every day you’re on set. You find that you fall more in love with Hugh, watching him interact with every single person and making sure that they feel seen and heard - he truly is perfect, and a really good man, and you have to wonder what you did to deserve him.
Hugh hadn’t brought up Jack in months since the last argument you both had and you’re grateful. You never wanted Jack to ever be the reason to get in between you and Hugh. While you feel partially responsible, you have come to realize that it was bound to happen eventually. It was naive to think that Hugh wouldn’t have reacted the way he did.
“So,” Hugh says, pulling you from your thoughts as you both remain lying in bed, limbs entangled after yet another intimate session of lovemaking.
“Hm?” You ask, turning to look over at him as your fingertips run across his bare chest.
“How are we going to go back to New York and not be with each other every night and morning?”
You arch a brow in his direction. You know what he’s implying and he’s just staring at you with a small smile. A hopeful smile. “I don’t know about you, but I’m glad to have my own space after–,” you tease, trying to keep a straight face.
Hugh narrows his eyes and moves to hover above you, hands grabbing your wrists and pinning them above your heads. You’re both still naked and he makes sure to press his hips into you. You can feel him getting harder and harder by the second.
“Wanna say that again, baby?”
“How are you getting hard again?” You ask, lifting your hips to roll against his.
“You make it easy,” he winks. “Now, don’t go and change the subject.”
“Well, that’s really difficult when you’re literally distracting me!”
Hugh smirks, his grip around your wrist tightening as he leans down to brush his lips against yours. “You ain’t gonna miss me?” He whispers, moving his hips as his tip brush against you. “Not gonna miss sleeping next to me and waking up next to me, baby?”
“Hugh…” your eyes flutter and your legs wrap around his hips, locking your ankles at his lower back. “I will… I will miss you. I was just teasing and–”
Hugh grins and slides into you in one thrust, growling as your walls surround him. “That’s what I thought.”
—
Later that week, you’re staring up at Hugh who’s grinning down at you. You’re in his trailer and he’s already in his Wolverine suit - albeit a little dirtier than when he first put it on and his arms now in full display.
“You’re telling me that I will need to oil you up?” You ask, eyes wide. “For what? Why? Oh my god, I’m gonna– How will I do that?!”
“Well, you put oil on your hands and–”
“Okay, ha ha.” You roll your eyes playfully, feeling his hands move to your hips. “Hugh…”
“What? You want someone else to oil me up? That it? First you say you won’t miss me when we go back home, that you want your space, and now you don’t wanna touch me?” He teases with a smirk. “What’s next, baby?”
“Oh stop, you’re being dramatic.” You laugh quietly, looking into his eyes.
“So, you’ll oil me up?” He grins.
“If I must,” you tease. “But you owe me.”
“Oh, baby, just you wait.” He winks.
“What does the scene even consist of where I have to put oil on you?”
“You’ll see.”
“Not even a hint?”
Hugh shakes his head and leans down to peck your lips lightly. “Nope. I will say, though,” he whispers, moving his lips along your jawline to your ear. “I’m gonna try my very best not to get excited when your hands are all over me.”
“Oh my god, you’re going to be shirtless, aren’t you?”
His lips grow into a wide grin as he gently nips along the side of your neck, hands gripping your hips. “Yeah, baby.”
You look at him from top to bottom, biting down on your lower lip as your gaze darkens at the thought. You clear your throat and look back into his eyes, slowly shaking your head. “Yeah, you owe me because I don’t know how I’m going to oil you up without wanting to–”
“Oh, I know,” Hugh chuckles, interrupting you. “Good thing it’s the last scene to shoot before we call it a day.”
“So, what I’m hearing is that after that scene, you’re going to take me back to the hotel and…” you wiggle your brows together. “You know.”
Hugh smirks, hands slowly moving from your hips to wrap around your waist, dipping low to rest on your backside. “I don’t know,” he lies. “Why don’t you tell me what I’ll be doing when we get back to the hotel room?”
“You’re gonna let me have my way with you,” you grin, nodding excitedly.
“Oh, I’m gonna let you, will I?”
“Yes.” you answer, matter-of-factly.
“Love the confidence, baby,” Hugh grins as he leans down to peck your lips lightly. “Gotta get back on set. I’ll see you later.”
“You’re such a tease.”
“Am I?”
“Yes, Hugh,” you answer, pulling back and looking up at him with a small pout on your lips.
“I’ll make it up to you,” he winks. “You know I will.”
“You better.”
“I promise,” Hugh says. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” you smile.
—
Throughout the rest of the day, you find yourself distracted with the thought of having to oil Hugh up for the last scene of the day. While you’re still in awe of the acting from both Ryan and Hugh, you can’t help but your eyes deviate to Hugh’s arms as he says his lines.
And even as that scene approaches, Shawn is the first one to walk up to you, a teasing grin on his lips. “So, you’re okay with oiling Hugh up for this last scene?”
“I think it’d be weird if I wasn’t,” you tease, biting the inside of your cheek in anticipation.
“That’s true,” he chuckles. “Ryan’s been teasing him all day about it,” Shawn points out.
“Oh, I don’t doubt it,” you smile. “How much oil will I have to put on him, by the way?”
“Um,” Shawn grins. “Quite a lot and depending on how many takes we’ll need to get the right one…”
“Okay, so we might need more than one bottle.”
“Oh, we have plenty.”
“And this scene…” you begin, playing with your camera strap.
“It’s a good one,” Shawn finishes for you.
“I mean, it wouldn’t be Wolverine if there wasn’t at least one shot of him without a shirt, right?”
Shawn laughs quietly. “That’s right… Speaking of the devil,” he nods his head over your shoulder and you turn slightly to see Hugh without his shirt, simply dressed in only the yellow and blue pants with the matching boots and cowl.
You clear your throat at the sight of him, his muscles clearly defined as you bite your lower lip. Your eyes linger on his chest and abdomen, moving along his strong arms and shoulders. Ryan’s voice breaks you out of your thoughts and you turn your gaze on the other man, who’s dressed in his entire Deadpool gear.
“You might want to pick up your jaw off the floor,” Ryan chuckles.
“Oh, shut up,” you reply, gently smacking his chest. “I see this every day, it’s nothing new to me,” you lie.
Hugh places his hands on his hips, staring at you with a slight tilt to his head and a small smirk on his lips. He can see your eyes flitting back to him, can see the way you're gently gnawing at your lower lip and he knows exactly what kind of look you’re giving him.
“I know,” Ryan sighs dramatically. “Lucky you.”
“Got the oil for you,” Hugh says, handing it to you and breaking you out of your thoughts. You take it from him slowly, fingers brushing against his.
“Right. So, we’re doing this now.” you say, gripping the bottle of oil tightly in your grasp.
Shawn nods and then looks over at you. “Don’t put too much,” he advises. “Just enough to make his skin glisten, like he’s sweating.”
“Right, right,” you nod, clearing your throat. “Not too much, but just enough.”
Ryan and Shawn quietly chuckle to themselves before giving the both of you some privacy. You look up at Hugh and bite your lower lip, eyes lingering on his lips as it moves down the side of his neck, to his chest and down his abdomen and back up.
“You nervous, baby?” Hugh whispers.
“N– No,” you stammer. “I just don’t want to mess up.”
“I don’t even think that’s possible,” he chuckles. “I’m ready for you, love.”
You nod slowly and then open the bottle of oil, squeezing just enough onto your palm. You set the bottle aside and rub your hands together to evenly distribute the oil before you reach out to place your hands on his shoulders, slowly moving them up and down before you move to his chest.
Hugh smirks, flexing his chest for you and he lets out a quiet chuckle when he hears you quietly gasp. “Love feeling your hands on me, baby,” he whispers.
“Stop distracting me,” you tease, pouring just a bit more oil onto your hands before you reach out to spread it along his chest down to his abdomen, feeling each ridge and muscle of his abs. Your hands move dangerously closer to the waistband of his pants, feeling Hugh’s hand immediately dart out to rest on your hip.
“Careful, baby.”
“Just making sure I got everything.” Slowly, you pull away and look at him, his upper half glistening with the oil you just applied. “I think– I think you’re ready to go.”
Hugh smiles and leans down to peck your lips lightly. “Thank you, baby.”
“I miss seeing your eyes,” you point out, motioning towards the cowl that’s placed atop of his head. “But I can’t lie… this is just as good a view.”
Hugh opens his mouth to say something, but hears his name being called by Ryan and Shawn. “Duty calls.”
“Try and get this in one take so you can take me back to the hotel.”
Hugh smirks. “Impatient, aren’t you?”
“Do you see yourself? I’d jump you right here if I could.”
“Naughty girl,” he whispers lowly.
“Hugh!” Ryan calls out. “Come on, buddy. I’m sure she will oil you up soon enough.”
“Go,” you say quietly.
Hugh nods and then turns on his heel to take his place on set.
—
It takes more than one take to complete the scene. After about two and a half bottles of oil and intense sexual tension radiating off you and Hugh, Shawn finally calls cut. Hugh walks over to you and takes the towel from your hands to wipe off the immense amount of oil that’s dripping from him, but he can’t help but watch your eyes ogle him. It always made him feel so special and borderline shy when your eyes linger on him, especially with the way you’re staring at him now.
“Just gotta head back to the trailer and change,” Hugh says. “Then we can go back to the hotel.”
Anticipation courses through your veins as you keep a tight hold on Hugh’s hand, fingers laced together as you walk alongside him. Once at his trailer, Hugh shuts the door and locks it behind him.
Before you can even ask what he’s doing, Hugh turns to face you and removes the cowl to set it aside. His gaze darkens at the sight of you and in just a few strides in your direction, he’s wrapping his strong arms around your waist and lifting you off your feet.
Your legs immediately wrap around his waist and your arms move around his shoulders. Letting out a quiet gasp, Hugh gently rests you on your back against the couch, kneeling on the floor between your legs.
“Hugh, what are you–”
“Been wanting you all day,” he says, his large hands moving to your jeans and undoing the button and zipper of it all too quickly. “Can’t wait anymore.”
“Baby–”
“Shh,” Hugh whispers, tugging your jeans down your legs and tossing the fabric over his shoulder. He looks up at you and then moves his hands to the waistband of your black lace panties, slowly tugging them down your legs as well. Once your lower half is completely exposed for him, Hugh holds your legs apart and growls at the sight of your slickened sex. He leans in and brushes the bridge of his nose against you, hands gripping your legs tightly. “Goddamn, baby. You’re already so wet for me.”
“It was because of all that oil,” you whimper, moving your hands to rest in his hair. “Please…”
“And here I thought you were gonna have your way with me,” he grins, pulling back just enough to brush the pad of his thumb against your bundle of nerves. Hugh looks up at you, watches you tilt your head back and your eyes fall shut at the lightest of touches.
“Oh, I will,” you groan. “But first, how about you do what you need to do and–”
“So demanding lately,” he grins, leaning in to lick a stripe along your soaking heat. A loud moan escapes your lips and Hugh smiles, pulling away. “Baby, you gotta stay quiet for me. There are still people on set and we can’t have them hearing you, hearing what I’m doing to you.”
“Fuck,” you whimper, nodding and moving your hands from his hair to cover your mouth instead. “I’ll try my best,” you mumble.
“Atta girl,” he praises and leans back in to lap at your juices, your wetness slowly beginning to trickle down his chest. Hugh grips your hips, holding you firmly against the couch as he moves his lips to your clit, flicking his tongue against it as he brings one hand between your legs. Without hesitation, he slides in two fingers as he sucks at your clit, beginning to pump his two digits in and out of your depths.
The sounds of your wetness squelches with each thrust of his fingers and he stares up at you to see how hard you’re trying to stay quiet. He smirks against you and slowly adds a third finger, a loud whimper escaping your lips at the intrusion.
Hugh turns his head and places soft kisses on the inside of your thigh as he leans back, continuing to move his fingers in and out of your depths as he leans over you. With his free hand, he gently removes your own from your mouth and leans in to brush his lips against yours.
“Feel good, baby?” he whispers, keeping his fingers deep within your depths as he begins to curl them inside of you. “Oh yeah, I can feel you trembling…”
You stare up at him, biting your lower lip as you try to hold back your moans. “Hugh, baby…”
“Doing so good for me, staying so quiet,” he grins, his fingers curling inwards as your walls begin to tremble and he knows you’re close. Knows that you’re about to reach a heightened pleasure that he leans in and presses his lips against yours in hopes to quiet your moans.
You reach down and grip his wrist, fingertips digging into his skin as you arch your back. You moan against his lips, feeling his tongue slide past your own and the sensations are just too much, too overwhelming. Hugh pumps his fingers in and out of you to help you ride out your climax, slowly pulling away to hold up his fingers in your direction.
“Look how wet you are for me,” he grins.
You look up at him, biting your lower lip as you watch him suck on his fingers, cleaning your slick free from his digits. “Hugh…”
“So fucking good,” he winks.
You’re breathing heavily, but you reach down for his pants and tug on it, seeing the length of his manhood pressing against the yellow fabric. “Take these off.”
Hugh smirks. “Yes, ma’am.” He makes quick work to remove his boots and his pants, kicking them off to the side carelessly. He looks down at himself, his manhood at attention and he settles himself once more between your legs. He holds onto the base of his length and runs his tip across your sex, growling lowly.
“Gonna fuck you now,” he groans.
“Please,” you whimper.
“Being such a good girl, baby,” Hugh smirks, slowly sliding into you in one thrust. He groans at your wetness, your warmth walls surrounding every inch of him. He leans down and rests his forehead against yours, pulling his hips back before he slides back in.
“Hugh, I don’t think…” you moan, moving your hands to his shoulders. “I can’t– I can’t stay quiet and–”
“Shh,” he whispers, moving his large hand over your mouth as he delivers a sharp thrust. “Yeah, you can, baby.”
You let out a loud moan, muffled by his hand as you stare up at him. Hugh pulls out to his tip and slides back into you in one thrust, your legs moving to wrap around his waist.
Hugh rests his forehead against yours, staring into your eyes as he keeps his hand over your mouth. Your moans and whimpers are muffled by his large hand and with each thrust, he can see the way your eyes flutter. Hugh’s thrusts continue at a rhythmic pace, your walls sliding along each inch and vein of his manhood. You’re so wet, so tight and warm and Hugh knows he can’t keep this up any longer.
“Fuck, baby, I’m gonna–” Hugh’s hips begin to stutter, but you reach down and push him away from you, causing a loud groan to escape his lips. He’s quick to grasp his manhood to slide back into you, but you shake your head and sit up on the couch, urging him to stand up. “What?”
“I want you to come in my mouth,” you tell him, biting your lower lip. “That’s one way you can keep me quiet.”
Hugh growls and nods, standing up like you asked. He brings a hand down to your cheek, brushing his thumb across your soft skin and gently tucking a fallen strand behind your ear. “Well?”
“Now, who’s impatient, hm?” you grin, reaching up to wrap your hand around his slick coated base as your lips move to his tip. Wrapping your lips around him, you begin to bob your head, hollowing your cheeks as your hand strokes the rest of him. You keep your eyes focused on him, watching as he tilts his head back and a hand moves to tangle his fingers into your hair.
“Oh, baby,” he groans, the grip in your tightening as you continue to bob your head in time with your strokes. Hugh can feel the tightness build once again in the pit of his stomach. He looks down at you and groans at the sight, your eyes staring up at him with his cock in his mouth.
God, if he could spend the rest of his days like this, Hugh would die a happy man.
“I’m close, I’m gonna–” Hugh’s voice cuts off as you take him even deeper into your mouth and he can feel the tip of his length hit the back of your throat. He groans loudly and gently brushes your hand away from him as he takes a hold of his base. He strokes himself once, twice, three times before spurts of his come release into your mouth.
You feel his warm spend fill your mouth, a mixture of salty and sweet taste. You swallow it eagerly, slowly bobbing your head as you feel him shudder against you, his hand in your release loosening its grip. When he pulls away, you smile up at him and gently place a soft and light kiss on his tip.
“Did you really just–”
“Swallow?” you finish for him and nod. “Yup… Is that okay?”
“Is that okay?” Hugh repeats. “Baby, you’re fucking perfect.”
---
taglist (if links don't work, i'm sorry!): @corvusmorte - @dragonqueen89 - @whimsiwitchy - @kellyxo1
@wolviehugh - @moonxknightx - @sullyselena - @angelofthorr - @spectorrrhgf
@needz1nk - @fandomxo00 - @godlypresley - @kythefangirl25 - @callsignyourmom
@sue8724 - @squishyfruitloop - @sylviavf - @emotrash1 - @dissentientss
@sir-thisisadndserver - @absolutepie - @millajay - @itsallyscorner - @haytchee
@wolverigrl - @its-in-the-woods - @d3ad2you - @definitely-not-chill - @khxna
@jules-and-gemss
#hugh jackman#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman fanfiction#hugh jackman fanfic#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman x female reader#hugh jackman x f!reader#hugh jackman x fem!reader#real person fiction#rpf#real person fanfiction#real person fanfic#story: training partners
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Ok so not to be totally obsessed with my own story or anything, but I'm actually pretty proud of how I did this one in "a love that burns like holy fire"... confidence is hard... I think it's pretty cute
[Chapter 2]
His whole life, Arthur had been certain that magic was evil, and that anyone who practiced magic was choosing evil. But he knew Merlin, despite everything he hadn’t known. He knew that Merlin, who’d stood up to him despite the risk of imprisonment and death when he was being a bully, wouldn’t have chosen evil. He knew that Merlin cared deeply about justice, and fairness, and good. Merlin was fundamentally good. So, since Merlin was magic, there had to be more to magic than he’d been taught.
[Chapter 4]
“Do you ever stop doing magic,” the knight laughed-- Lancelot . “Not that I’m complaining right now or any--Arthur” Lancelot suddenly realized what he said, and who had been there to hear it--not having recognized Arthur before--and panic spiked in his voice. “Don’t worry,” Arthur groaned. “I know. Though, more and more, I feel like an idiot for not knowing sooner.” He dismounted as Merlin helped Lancelot to his feet.
[Chapter 5]
“Thank you, for tonight,” Merlin said, once they were back at the inn and Arthur was back to normal. “I know your history with magic…” “My father’s wrong about magic, Merlin,” Arthur said, though it was clearly hard for him to admit. He took a step closer and ran his fingers up and down the sides of Merlin’s waist, and kissed him softly before continuing. “I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to face him or set all that right but… Merlin you are the most amazing person I’ve ever met, and no matter what I thought I knew I can’t believe the world would be better without you in it. I refuse.” Arthur's words were unexpected and overwhelming, and Merlin brought him into a long, slow kiss to try to keep the tears welling in his eyes from becoming something more. “Leofman,” he whispered through heavy breaths, the word that meant other half, and beloved, and bonded one, and partner in a way no words outside the old language seemed to. Arthur wrapped an arm around Merlin, but pulled back just far enough to look into his eyes, and to wipe away the tears forming in the corners of his eyes. “Leofman,” Arthur agreed, pronunciation exceptional for having only heard the term twice. “I’m not always good with words, Merlin, and feelings but… this is real, what we have. I’d do anything to protect it. Protect you.” Merlin broke their gaze, shaking his head as if physically forcing himself to be realistic. “Don't make promises you can't keep, Arthur.” “I’m not. I don't, ever.” Merlin hugged Arthur close to him, then. The kind of hug that felt like home, and love, and destiny. The kind of hug that made up for all the years without hugs and gentle touches. The kind of hug that proved to Arthur, once again, that he was making the right choice in all this.
(edited because I don't know how to double check that my paragraphs look separate enough before posting things apparently :P )
ill always be a sucker for post magic reveal conversations where merlins like ‘You dont hate my magic? I thought you’d live the rest of your life thinking magic was evil, what changed your mind?’
and arthur simply says something like you
#bbc merlin#fanfic#merlin x arthur#arthur's magic reaction#Elements of Albion#a love that burns like holy fire#fanfiction means Arthur gets to have character growth#merthur
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Since you were so graceful to deliver us that magnificent Optimus (and autobots) x Human in their heat cycle, another question arises. What are the autobots' thoughts on eating pussy? What about their styles?? Please and thank u
Good god, I’m going to assume this is general TFP pussy eating and nothing to do with the heatverse. For now I’ll stick to the main cast and add Wheeljack/Ultra Magnus/Smokescreen when I get a better feel for how I want to write them. (also fuck making gifs, thank you for existing, Tenor)
Back when he went by Orion Pax, he was as chaste as a lily. Not from lack of fuckability, oh no. His small frame at the time made him especially cute to onlookers, but it was nigh impossible to hang around him when he was too busy working as a clerk or researching Cybertron’s history in his downtime. There's certainly a possibility he ate at least (1) valve back on Cybertron. Whose? Who fucking knows. My bet would be on Megatronus, but he wouldn’t have horribly fumbled the bag if that was the case. Maybe cunnilingus could have saved their planet… Having, to an extent, merged his consciousness with the thirteen primes, he has gained their wisdom and become something akin to a demi-God by Cybertronian standards. Except with none of the praise, and the weight of the world on his shoulders. Anyway, let’s cease philosophizing about his nature as a Prime, what we’re looking for is how good he is at eating pussy with that extra knowledge. Answer: it depends on the receiver. Considering the size difference, he makes it work without catching your clit between his glossa’s mesh plating. He prefers supporting you in his massive servos, carefully wrapping his digits around your frame in case you start squirming too much and fall off. He applies slow languid licks between pauses, waiting to gauge your reaction in case he’s hurting you. It’s sweet of him, but please Optimus, you need to make your partner cum else they’ll die.
Ratchet has been alive for Primus knows how many slutty millenia. Of course he can eat valves. And if he can eat valves, he can eat human pussy just fine. The hard part is dragging him away from his workstation. Don’t get him wrong, he would love to bury his face between your legs, but he’s got things to do, nevermind a whole ass team to keep alive on top of manning the ground bridge and fixing whatever alien technical bullshittery Raf can’t help with (seeing as the little guy only takes care of the human technical bullshittery). He’s perpetually exhausted, and if Cybertronians had an equivalent to coffee, you’re sure he’d be downing it like a single father after losing everything in the divorce except the kids. So when he gets the chance to eat pussy, he takes his damn time with it, pressing his face against your groin for so long you think he’s fallen into recharge. When he gets to work, he’s savoring every inch of you, making a point to complain there isn’t enough energon to mass displace and taste you completely. The size difference is especially annoying to him, but he makes due nonetheless by slipping the tip of his glossa between your folds, pushing it as far as it can go without hurting you. His engine growls from desperate hunger as he grinds his spike against the ground, grunting and scoffing against your pussy as he has to contend with the smallest sample he’s ever received. Ratchet is going to kill Megatron.
Bulkhead is a complicated case. Yes, he’s tried valves. Any wrecker worth their weight in energon has eaten valves like no tomorrow. But the point is, when you look at his jaw, things get a bit complicated. An overbite in humans is mildly bothersome for a giver, but it gets even worse when you look at Cybertronian anatomy and realize that oh, he’s going to do some major jaw exercises to stick his glossa out properly and eat you out. Thank fuck you’re so small in this case, you have no idea much easier this makes his job. To be fair, his main worry is hurting you. Optimus is careful, yes, but Bulkhead has known destruction for the vast majority of his life, not only as a career, but as a way of life. So when he finds you naked in his servos, smiling up at him, his spike retracts into his panel from anxiety alone. If he so much as bruises you, he will shrivel up and offline. He can handle humans just fine, but during interface? He already has to take a breather before he tries anything in the Cybertronian equivalent of a panic attack. His cooling fans are screeching, and if he could sweat, he’d be causing a major flood in Nevada and all its neighboring states. In conclusion, yes, he can eat out. Not perfectly, but he puts in some valiant effort that’s sure to pay off sooner or later.
At first glance, you may exclaim “Wowzers! Bumblebee doesn’t have a mouth! How can he eat pussy without glossa or lips?” – well guess what! Take a vibrator and stick it between your legs. That’s Bumblebee right there. They should add him as a synonym for it in the dictionary. He may not be able to lick up your juices, but he can buzz incessantly against your groin at a near illegal setting until you come undone. He is so proud of himself. And for his own sake, let’s hope he never got to experience valves before he lost his oral equipment. He tries to be comforting, beeping words of encouragement that you absolutely do not understand but get the gist off anyways. Chances are, he’s either helping you balance on top of his face to get the full hitachi magic wand duct taped to the floor experience, or you’re both lying down while you’re cupped in his servos as he buzzes excitedly between your legs; equal parts cute and overwhelming. You feel bad for using him like this, but he beeps reassuringly and urges you to lie back in his servos and enjoy the ride. He’s such a hitachi toy it’s not even funny anymore. You start giving him setting levels which he eagerly follows like the boyscout he is, keeping the same vibration pace even as you start humping his face plate. You pray to Primus Raf isn’t looking for his guardian, else he’s going to overhear things you would rather die than explain.
Arcee is… way too good at eating out. On Cybertron, she could eat a valve like her life depended on it, sucking on the anterior node and wiggling her glossa inside of it well after her partners would overload, begging her to stop from overstimulation alone. Nowadays, she still has it. With her two-wheeler frame type, she can easily access a human pussy without any trouble, treating it like the cutest minicon valve she’s ever seen. She’s all rapid licks and wandering digits, stuffing you to the brim when she’s busy torturing your clit between her lips, then circling around it as she pushes her tongue between your folds. Arcee’s a fucking menace. She leaves you a crying hyperventilating mess as you plead with her to let you breathe. Yes, she’ll take your words into account and stop at some point. Key word: some. You get a break whenever she fancies. This, or you go into cardiac arrest and she has to deal with your metaphorical blood on her juice-soaked servos, all from eating pussy too good. No one should have that sort of power. But Arcee does, because she’s an unstoppable force. Prepare yourself from some light pillow talk after she takes mercy on you, stroking your cheek and leaning in for a kiss. You can taste yourself on her intake, and she wants you to contemplate the flavor as she wraps her arms around your squishy body in a protective hug, the blue glow of her optics dancing over your skin.
#transformers x reader#transformers x human#transformers prime#valveplug#tfp optimus x reader#tfp arcee x reader#tfp arcee#tfp ratchet#tfp optimus#tfp bumblebee x reader#tfp bumblebee#tfp ratchet x reader#tfp bulkhead x reader#tfp bulkhead
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how do you think matt would react if he found his girl sh-ing? (u should make a one shot on this <3) would chris react the same as matt?
matt finding out his girl is sh
. detailed mentions of self harm and anxiety !! pls read with caution <3 this is also in no way romanticizing sh ! remember u are loved :)
you shakily pried open the back of your phone case, carefully removing the small blade you’d taken from your shower razor. standing over the sink as water poured from faucet, you slid up the sleeves of your sweater, an array of both fresh and healed scars adorning your skin. you felt tears prick your eyes as you began to slide the blade against your skin, slashing new cuts into your wrists.
as hard as you tried, you just couldn’t stop yourself from hurting yourself. it had become your way of coping with your anxiety, and your solution to every situation that arose. and matt, poor matt, was so observant in your change of behavior. the way you only wore long sleeves, how you seemed to panic whenever he held your hand. you two stopped having sex months ago. and you noticed how it affected your relationship. you noticed how everything that you did affected your relationship. and that only made you want to hurt yourself even more.
matt deserved a better girlfriend. or so you thought. in your head, you were ruining matt’s life. you were barely there anymore, feeling like you were a ghost watching your life from the outside. and you loved matt so much, so much that it hurt, and all you wanted was for him to be happy. but to you, if you weren’t happy, matt couldn’t be happy.
lost in your thoughts, you didn’t realize the mess of blood you were making in the sink, and matt knocking on the door softly. “baby are you good? i’m home with food.”
you cursed underneath your breath, hurriedly turning off the sink and holding a fist over your cuts, trying to stop the flow of blood. i’m okay was all you could unconvincingly rasp out.
“are you sure? can i come in?” matt called out, his voice as sweet and caring as ever. because why wouldn’t it be. you were matt’s entire world, the only thing that mattered to him was you.
“i’ll be right out, i’m okay.” you spoke, trying your best to stop your voice from shaking. you looked down at your cloth covered wrists, dark stains seeping through the sleeves where your hand was clamped around them.
but, matt knew you. he knew something was wrong, and he knew you weren’t okay. so, matt being matt, pushed his thumb against the lock, twisting it as it unlocked. slowly, he turned the doorknob, opening the bathroom door where he saw you standing inside, a panicked expression on your face as you held a hand over your wrists.
matt’s eyes scanned around the bathroom, his face falling as he realized what you were doing. the blade on the counter, the blood in the sink, the way you were drawing your arms into your body. and suddenly, the last few months made sense. "sweetheart.” he couldn’t even manage a whisper.
matt swiftly made his way to you, wrapping his arms around your body as he held you tight. you couldn’t stop the sobs that racked your body, crying hard into matt’s chest while he just cradled you. he kissed the side of your head repeatedly, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as he pulled you both down onto the tiled floor, letting you climb up into his lap.
“i’m sorry,” you sniffled, burying your face into his shoulder, “i’m sorry i’m so messy.”
matt pulled away, his expression as if you had just personally offended him. his ran a thumb across your tear stricken cheek, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. “don’t be sorry, i’m not upset.”
he continued to comfort you, rocking you back and forth in his arms on the bathroom floor.
“i’m always gonna be here for you.” he mumbled into your hair, feeling his own eyes begin to well with tears. “no matter what.”
“always?”
“always.”
© mattscoquette
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬. ⋆˚꩜。 i kinda wanna start trying to write more angsty stuff like this, ty for this request ! can’t lie i lowk cried writing this but i feel like it lowk helped me in a way bc i used to struggle w this. anyway i hope u guys like <3 and if anyone needs someone to talk to im here !!
#© mattscoquette#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#matt sturniolo angst#matt sturniolo imagine#matt sturniolo x reader#matt stuniolo fanfic#matthew sturniolo#sturniolo#sturniolo angst#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic
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Love your work! it’s so good, i was wondering if i could request another darkpervy!Logan and reader, She’s sleeping and he sneaks into her room and does whatever, you can decide if she wakes up or not and what they do, thank you!
note: we’ve been gone for a little, but we could never not come back with a dirty, dark, and pervy Logan Howlett post.
———
Logan wasn’t the type to think about secrets the group exposes on themselves on their drunk Friday nights, but what y/n had said earlier had been in his head for the last hour.
“Is it normal to, like, pass out after you finish? I’m not joking- Shop laughing!”
Everyone took what she said as a normal dirty secret, but Logan? God, he got hard within seconds of hearing her secret.
Now the man is outside of her room, listing through the thick door for her moans. He could tell she was close.
“F-Fuck,” y/n whined as her legs began to shake. Logan did his best to keep himself back from cumming right then. Her voice was enough to make a mess in his pants.
After Logan heard a few whines that sounded low and dead, he knocked on her door. He prayed she wouldn’t answer, and thank god she didn’t.
Logan quickly entered her room, closing and locking the door before anyone saw him in the hallway.
The man slowly turned around and met y/n’s sleeping body. She really wasn’t lying.
Logan was excited, heart pounding as his cock twitched. He knew tonight would be the best night he’s ever had.
“Can smell that pussy from over here…” Logan spoke low as he came up to her bed. He thought about taking his time, maybe eating her out or jerking off over her face, but he decided he needed to be in her.
Logan quickly undressed himself before hovering over her, getting in between her loose legs to spread them apart. “So perfect,” was all he could say.
Y/n isn’t too much of a heavy sleeper after she goes out after an orgasm, but for some reason, she hasn’t woken up yet. That orgasm had been one of the top bests.
“Gonna get this done quick and easy, okay, princes?” Logan spoke as he began pushing at her entrance, instantly feeling her tighten around his shaft. Logan groaned loudly as y/n whined, slowly waking up.
Y/n spoke, but Logan couldn’t understand her. She hadn’t even known what she said. She was out of it, and that only made her look better to the man.
“Keep it down, baby,” Logan said as y/n’s head slowly began to move, but she wasn’t fully awakened. She knew something was going on, but she felt pressure in her lower stomach and head. She felt a good kind of dizzy.
“So fuckin’ wet, Bub. You weren’t gonna tell me this? I thought we were close friends?” Logan said as his hands grabbed her lower body, pulling her into his now hard and deep thrust.
Y/n’s eyes squeezed before she tried opening them. She had failed a few times until they finally opened. That meant nothing though, as they were rolling to the back of her head from the sudden pleasure.
“Feels good, sweetheart? Tell me. Tell me you feel good, y/n”, Logan growled as he looked down at her smaller girl, watching her struggle to stay awake and take him.
“Lo?” Y/n asked, which came out as a whine. “Ah huh, I’m right here, baby. It’s me,” the man assured as her hands touched anywhere to grasp what was happening to her.
“L-Lo,” y/n whined, feeling his cock slip into her with ease as she grew more wet. Now she knew she was being fucked, but her brain still couldn’t comprehend the situation.
“Don’t worry — I’m close,” Logan spoke, confusing y/n as she slowly lifted her head. The young lady focused on what was thrust in and out of her cunt, and when she realized it, she couldn’t help but moan.
“Logan,” y/n whined, eyes still on the way his cock pushed into her. “You like it?” Logan asked again as one hand rested on the back of her head, keeping her up to see the view as the other strongly gripped her waist.
“I-I don’t know,” y/n said, but lord knew she loved this. “C’mon, Bub — Tell me you like it. You take me too good not to like it,” Logan said, feeling himself near. “I-I like it,” Y/n’s low voice echoed through his brain.
“Fuck yeah — You fuckin’ like it, baby? Like me having my way with your half-unconscious body?” Logan couldn’t stop thinking about how much he loved her being this way. He never knew this was a kink until earlier today.
“I-I do,” y/n replied right before a pool of cum gushed out of her. “Oh yeah, baby — That’s what I like to see,” Logan picked his pace up, feeling his cock goat h uncontrollably.
“Once I fill you up, I won’t be able to stop,”
#james howlett#james howlett x reader#logan howlett x reader#wolverine#james howlett smut#logan howlet smut#logan howlett smut#logan howlett xmen#wolverin smut#wolverine smut#hugh jackman x you#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman#the worst logan x reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlet x reader#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett#logan wolverine#james howlett x you#dom!logan howlett#dom!james howlett#dom!wolverine#wolverine x female reader#wolverine x you#wolverine xmen#wolverine x men#wolverine x reader
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I wanna see what’s Ace’s family’s reaction when they found out Ace is dating reader Heheheh
I decided to have only Ace's brother present, since Mr. and Mrs. Trappola have yet to receive strong characterization.
Family means Nobody is Left Behind or Forgotten.
The Trappola brothers sat across from one another upon red velvet chairs, and you, between them. They were both intently focused on building a house of playing cards—a task that Ace had warned took “serious patience, coordination, and a gentle touch.” (You had rolled your eyes and responded, “Great. You let me know when you’ve found someone that has all that.”)
Ace carefully laid a Two of Spades down, formed a triangle with a Three of Clubs and a Four of Diamonds. His hand slowly retreated, and the triangle stayed. He expelled a sigh, directed away from the cards so as to not disturb them.
You would have clapped for him, but Ace had discouraged you before the game had even started. So instead, you tapped your index and middle fingers together. Still giving applause, but not nearly enough to rattle the house of cards.
“Your move.”
“Huh, you’ve gotten better at this,” his brother mused. He toyed with an Ace of Hearts, expertly twirling it between dexterous fingers. “Too bad. I was really looking forward to smoking you in front of your new friend.”
“In your dreams,” Ace sneered, passing you a glance. “The last thing I’d want is to look uncool in front of my partner.”
His brother drew himself up in his seat. The card in his hand, stilling. “Your partner? Since when were you two a thing?”
“Oh, you know… since a while ago,” Ace casually replied. “And honestly, I can’t really blame’m. Who wouldn’t fall for my dashing good looks and roguish charm? I’m a catch!”
His brother regarded you with an almost pitying look. “It’s not too late to change your mind,” he advised.
You burst into laughter. "I think I'm good. Ace is an idiot, but he's at least my idiot."
He raised an eyebrow. "So you've got a sense of humor. You'll need that if you're going to put up with Ace all of the time. Congrats, you passed the first test."
"Whaddya mean 'put up with' me?!" Ace protested, puffing up his cheeks. A pout--adorable, you think.
"I mean it exactly how I said it. It's practically a full-time job dealing with you," his brother replied cheekily. "You gotta prepare people for it, or else they won't know what they've signed up for."
"Oh, come on! You're making me sound way worse than I actually am."
"This, coming from the guy who ghosted his ex?" He smirked, and you could see the family resemblance in it. The slight narrowing of the eyes, the way his mouth angled. "I dunno, I was half expecting you to stay single forever after that royal screw-up, lil' bro. You're lucky you found someone willing to take you~"
Pink exploded onto Ace's cheeks. "H-Hey...!" he hissed, leaning toward his brother. "Did you seriously have to bring that up?! Have a little more tact, will ya?!"
The older Trappola grinned. "Gotcha."
You realized why.
Ace's sudden movement had sent a slight breeze against the card house. It wobbled from top to bottom--then the structure collapsed in on itself, the cards all folding into one another. Within seconds, the house was a pile on the coffee table.
Ace fell to his knees with a pathetic wail, scrambling to salvage his hard work. His brother looked on, chuckling. A card, still in his hand.
"I didn't place mine yet," he declared triumphantly, "and since you made the house fall, it's technically my win!"
"Y-You sneaky...! You taunted me on purpose!!"
"Yeah, and it worked like a charm." He flicked Ace on the forehead. "You were too busy trying to flex in front of your S/O. It was easy to take advantage of that. You always were a cocky, predictable brat."
"Grrrrr..!!"
"Ace, it's fine," you soothed him, a hand on his arm. "You did your best. It doesn't change how I feel about you."
"Tch, there you go being all sappy again... You're so lame sometimes," Ace grumbled--but he covered your hand with his. A small gesture, but a reassuring one.
"Hahah, look at you two lovebirds," his brother teased, wagging a finger at you. Then he reached out and roughly ruffled Ace's hair, despite his complaints and attempts to swat him away. "Happy for you though, lil' bro! You gotta tell me how this love story started--"
#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#Ace Trappola x Reader#Ace Trappola#Reader#self insert#NRC Family Day#twst interactions#twisted wonderland interactions#twst imagines#twisted wonderland imagines#twst scenarios#twisted wonderland scenarios
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DOE-EYED BOY S.W
Summary Dean drops Sam off at the Harvelle Roadhouse after a vamp nest. The older Winchester isnt oblivious about Sam’s feelings towards you, he just thinks his brother needs a little push.
Content warnings SMUT!! piv, dirty talk, pet names (Angel, Sweetheart, baby, Sweet girl.), Fem!Harvelle!Reader, based on Jo & Dean from s2, Reader is Ellen’s daughter, semi-public sex, ?rough? sex, Fear of getting caught, teasing, creampie, Dean being an ass, slight plot + more.
notes wow, I have so many ideas and this is one that I actually completed!! 1200+ words.
xoxo, roro!
——
After a vampire nest, Sam and Dean stopped at the Harvelle Bar. Yeah, the motel was in the complete and opposite direction of where your bar was, but Dean knew, despite Sam not admitting it, that he wanted to see you.
Dean tried to hit on you first with cheesy pickup lines, but you didn’t have eyes for Dean. The younger Winchester was more in your view. He was doe-eyed, his brown locks were shaggy, along with his shyness around you in general. He was educated though, he was intelligent. He was skilled as well, you could see why he was the one who made the plans most of the time on hunts.
You became close with the other brother, the doe eyed boy captivating in almost every way.
The Impala came to a halt outside the bar. Sam’s head perked up, his eyes immediately narrowing at his brother.
“Dean-“ The older Winchester cut him off, “C’mon, Sammy! Go talk to her.” Dean had that smug, classic smirk on his face. Sam knew Dean wouldn’t leave it, or back off about it. So, he got out of the car and walked through the door. Dean muttered something inaudible under his breath that Sam couldn’t quite make out. He wasn’t sure he wanted to, though.
When the door pushed open, signaling the bell to ring, your head perked up. The smile that curled up on your lips was contagious, one forming on his as well.
The bar was empty, Sam had a feeling your mother was upstairs since she wasn’t located in the area. Even with a dirty apron wrapped around your hips, you looked beautiful. Sam already had the urge to brush that stray hair out of your eyesight.
“Sorry, we just got out of a Vamp nest and Dean decided to come here so-“ His eyebrows raised when he was cut off with your lips pressing against his. He froze for a moment, before melting into it. He could feel your smile against his lips.
Sam pulled back just a mere inch away from your lips so he could speak, “What about Ellen?-“
“If you’re scared of my mother, she’s upstairs.” You teased, your hand reached down to interlock with his. Pulling him to the backroom behind the bar area.
Once the door shut (louder than it should’ve been), Sam met your lips again. Leading you over to the desk in the middle of the room. He lowered you down onto it, without disconnecting your lips.
Your hand slid the Carhartt jacket off his shoulders while Sam clumsily fiddled with the buttons of your jeans. He spoke again, “Lift your hips f’ me, Angel.” You obliged quicker than you would to do a chore.
Sam slid your jeans off your body, leaving them discarded on the floor. His fingers slid down to your clothed core, instantly feeling the arousal that soaked through your panties. He let out a groan, “Fuck, baby… you’ve been waiting for me?” Sam only got more desperate when he heard your whine. When your hands went to fumble at his belt, he assisted you. Sliding the leather out of its loops and unzipping his jeans quickly.
Your eyes looked up at his, your lips were parted slightly. You trailed your hand into his boxers, Sam let out a hiss at the contact. He was so hard already, and he didn’t think he would last for any foreplay.
“As much- as much as I’d love it, can’t wait, Sweetheart…” Before you could even mutter out a reply, a moan ripped from your throat when Sam flipped you onto your stomach. His fingers teasingly tracing the hemline of your panties before he finally pulled them down. You clenched around nothing just at the cold air hitting your cunt.
Sam wrapped a hand around his length as he guided himself closer to you. His tip brushed up and down your slick entrance.
“God- you’re soaked, baby… ‘s because of me? Or ‘cause you know your mom could come down and see us?” You mewled at his teasing, “Please… Please I can’t wait anymor-“ The moan that came from you was so loud, so pornographic. Sam was stretching you in half… and he was only slightly past the tip. Sam groaned as he sheathed himself inside of you, watching each inch of his cock fitting snugly inside of your pussy.
Sam’s hand slapped against your mouth, trying his best to muffle your noises.
“You’re so loud, Sweet girl… you want us to get caught? You want someone to see my dick inside of this pretty little hole? Stretching it wide?” Sam let out a moan when you squeezed him, despite his dirty talk on being quiet, he wasn’t doing any better. He gave you a few more moments to adjust before he pulled out and slammed back in.
The vulgar whines and cries of his name falling from your parted lips had Sam feeling as if he could combust at any moment. The cool metal of the desk against your stomach made you shiver.
Sam’s thrusts were rapid, rough. He was chasing his own orgasm, using your body like a sexdoll. And you didn’t mind it, fuck, you loved it. You loved it more than you should’ve.
“Mm- Sammy… ‘s so good, need it- auh! Need it harder…” You pleaded with him, Sam let out a dark chuckle at that. You were getting off on this, getting off on his dick slamming in and out of your cunt, on how he used you like you were nothing but a whore.
“Fuck- you want it harder, baby? Shit, i’m gonna give you it.” He said between heavy breaths. Both of your breathing combined was harsh and heavy. And the way you were squeezing around Sam, gave him a clear idea of how much you wanted this.
Your whimpers and whines became more pitched, more frequent. Not that far away from each noise you made. You were close, and that drove Sam to move faster. His hips were set to a bruising pace, and the grip he had on your own was hard. Designed to leave a mark of this encounter.
“Fill me up, Sammy.. I wan’- wan’ to feel it. Need to feel your cum inside me... ple-ase!” The plea was so broken sounded. You sounded like you were on the verge of tears as he destroyed you. Sam grunted hearing your plead for him, just the words you spoke had him pulsing.
He groaned again, “Yeah- Yeah… that’s it. Gonna let me fuck it into this pussy, huh? Need my fucking kids, don’t you?” You nodded, saliva smeared on your lips and the corner of your mouth. Your brain turning to mush.
Your orgasm hit you hard, your vision blinking white as you let out a broken scream of pleasure. Sam followed behind you, moaning at the sensation.
He was careful when he pulled out, your mixed juices threatening to spill. Sam didn’t hesitate in lifting his middle finger and shoving it back inside of your abused cunt. You let out a whimper at the sudden intrusion.
Sam helped you put your clothes back on before he did his own, he constantly kept asking if you were okay or if it was too much.
“Did I do too much- hurt you or anything? You’re okay right-“ You cut him off with a smile, “It was perfect, Sam. You didn’t do anything, I promise.” Sam sighed in relief, before a thought came to his mind.
“You’re sure your mom didn’t hear…?”
#sam winchester smut#supernatural#fem!reader#sam winchester#jared padalecki#sam winchester x female reader#sam winchester x reader#dom!sam winchester
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★ dancing phantoms on the terrace; are they second-hand embarrassed, that i can't get out of bed? cause something counterfeit's dead; it was legendary; it was momentary; it was unnecessary ─── PB⁵
⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 | 6.4k
⟢ ┈ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 | you and paige have always danced around each other—an intricate waltz of unspoken words and fleeting touches, each step pulling you closer to the edge of something you both feared to define. but when your feelings finally bubble over, paige’s silence cuts sharper than anything you could have imagined. in the wake of her denial, you vow to let her go, but it’s hard to sever the bond when she keeps lingering in the corners of your world, drawing you back like gravity. what happens when you can’t be friends, but letting go feels impossible?
⟢ ┈ 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 | angst w/ no happy ending. weird fwb, cheating (kinda?), toxic relationships, emotional manipulation, unhealthy attachment, and cycles of miscommunication and unresolved feelings.
⟢ ┈ 𝐞𝐯'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬 | this is lowkey just a word vomit... idk how to feel about it. i've been on an angst kick lately and i'm apologizing for this fic right now, it's EMOTIONALLY DAMAGING. um anyway, don't even ask how i am right now... enjoy?
The gym smells like worn leather and ambition—Paige’s favorite cocktail, if you had to guess. The echo of bouncing basketballs fills the cavernous space, and there she is, effortlessly commanding the court like it’s her birthright. You’d think the sight of her—golden hair slicked back, sharp focus slicing through the room—would dull with time, but it hasn’t. If anything, it’s worse.
You don’t mean to stare, but when it’s her, you always do.
“Hey,” her voice cuts through your thoughts, soft but with a rasp that’s always felt like a secret shared just between the two of you. Paige jogs toward you, her smile easy, but her eyes? Complicated. Like she knows. Like she’s always known.
“Hey,” you manage, though your throat feels tight, your body betraying you with a spark of something you’ve tried to douse for months.
She stops just short of you, close enough that you can smell the faint citrus of her shampoo. “Thought you were too busy to come by anymore.”
You shrug, trying to play it cool, but the weight of her gaze makes it impossible. “I’m not staying long. Just… passing through.”
It’s a lie. You’ve never been able to just pass through when it comes to her.
Paige grins, wiping sweat from her brow with the hem of her jersey. It’s a fleeting movement, but it leaves your pulse racing, and you hate yourself for it. She doesn’t notice—or maybe she does, and that’s worse.
“You’re a bad liar,” she says, her tone teasing but gentle. She tilts her head, like she’s reading something written on your face. “You okay?”
It’s such a simple question, but the weight of it threatens to shatter your resolve.
“I’m fine,” you say too quickly. Too sharply.
Her brows knit together, but she doesn’t push. Paige never pushes. It’s you who always falls, silently hoping she’ll be there to catch you.
But you’re tired of hoping.
“I should go,” you mutter, turning before the cracks in your chest start to show. But her hand wraps around your wrist, stopping you.
“Wait.”
It’s a single word, but it roots you in place, her touch burning like truth against your skin. You turn back to her, and for a moment, there’s nothing but the sound of your breath and the ache of everything you’ll never say.
And Paige, looking at you like she wants to say it too.
SIX MONTHS AGO
The party was already half a blur when Paige walked in, but her presence made everything snap into focus. You hadn’t been looking for her—you’d told yourself you wouldn’t—but there she was, a magnet pulling every molecule of you in her direction. She wasn’t dressed for the occasion like everyone else, no glittering dresses or expensive heels. Just a hoodie, sneakers, and that disarming grin.
You were nursing a drink, not for the taste, but for the illusion of control. People were scattered across the house in little clusters, and you were tucked into a corner of the living room, balancing somewhere between tipsy and regretfully sober. That is, until Paige caught sight of you.
Her gaze found you through the crowd like it was the easiest thing in the world, and you felt it—really felt it. That invisible thread between the two of you, taut and unyielding.
“Hey, stranger.” Her voice carried over the low hum of music and chatter as she slid into the empty space beside you on the couch.
You laughed softly, but it came out more nervous than amused. “Stranger? I didn’t know you even remembered my name.”
She tilted her head, her grin shifting into something softer. “I remember a lot more than that.”
The comment shouldn’t have sent a shiver down your spine, but it did. Paige had a way of saying things like they were just words when they were anything but.
“Didn’t expect to see you here,” you admitted, your fingers tightening around the red Solo cup in your hand.
“Yeah, well…” Paige’s eyes dropped to your drink before returning to your face, and it made you feel naked somehow. “Needed a break. Thought I’d find you.”
Thought I’d find you.
The words hung in the air, charged, and you couldn’t tell if she was teasing or telling the truth. Maybe both.
The night blurred after that, the two of you falling into a rhythm that felt far too natural for how often you tried to keep your distance. Drinks were passed back and forth, jokes were made, her laughter melted into yours. Every time her knee brushed yours, your pulse spiked. Every time her fingers lingered on your arm, your stomach flipped.
At one point, someone turned up the music, and people started dancing in the center of the room. You didn’t want to, but Paige grabbed your hand, her touch electrifying. “C’mon,” she coaxed, her eyes gleaming with something dangerous.
You followed, of course.
The two of you didn’t so much dance as sway, caught in your own little bubble amidst the chaos. Her hands found your hips, and she pulled you closer, so close you could smell the faint tang of beer on her breath. The way she looked at you—dark, intent, unflinching—made the air between you too thick to breathe.
“Having fun yet?” she asked, her voice low.
You nodded, though fun wasn’t the word for what you were feeling. It was something else entirely.
“Good,” she murmured, leaning in. Her lips brushed your ear as she spoke, sending a shiver through your entire body. “’Cause you deserve it.”
When you pulled back to meet her gaze, you saw it: the crack in her armor. That small, fleeting look of hesitation before she leaned in and kissed you.
It wasn’t gentle. It wasn’t shy. Paige kissed you like she’d been holding back for years, and maybe she had. Your drink slipped from your hand, forgotten, as your fingers found their way into her hair. The rest of the world vanished, the party, the music, the people. There was only her—her lips, her hands, the heat of her against you.
Somehow, the two of you stumbled your way upstairs, her hand firmly gripping yours as she led you to a bedroom. The door clicked shut behind you, and suddenly it was just the two of you, no distractions, no pretense.
You shouldn’t have let it happen, but you did. And it wasn’t just the alcohol, wasn’t just the heat of the moment. It was years of longing packed into a single night.
When it was over, you lay tangled together, the glow of the moon casting soft light across her face. Paige was quiet, her fingers drawing absent patterns on your bare shoulder. You wanted to say something—anything—but the words caught in your throat.
“I can’t do this,” she finally whispered, her voice breaking the fragile silence.
Your chest tightened. “What do you mean?”
She turned to face you, and the conflict in her eyes was enough to make your heart ache. “I’m… I’m trying to focus on basketball. This—us—it’s too much.”
Her words felt like a slap, but the way she looked at you—regretful, hesitant, almost desperate—kept you from walking out right then and there. Instead, you forced a nod. “Okay.”
“But—” she added quickly, her hand finding yours, “this doesn’t have to be it. We can figure something out. Later.”
It was a promise she had no right to make, and deep down, you knew that. But when she kissed you again, softer this time, you let yourself believe it.
That was the beginning of the end.
Paige had a way of engulfing your life without even trying, and the worst part was, you let her. She wasn’t yours—you weren’t hers—but she consumed you, seeped into the quiet corners of your world until there wasn’t a part of you she hadn’t touched.
She made it look so easy, too. Like you were the one complicating things.
Every time you tried to pull away, she’d reel you back in with a text, a glance, a late-night phone call that started with “I was just thinking about you.” It was never enough to feel like a relationship, but it was always just enough to keep you tethered to her.
You told yourself it didn’t matter, that you didn’t need a label, that you could handle the messiness of it all. But then you’d see her with someone else at a party, her arm slung around a teammate’s shoulders, her laughter spilling over like champagne, and it’d feel like your chest was being hollowed out with a dull spoon.
Still, you stayed.
You stayed because of the way she looked at you when no one else was around, like you were the only person in the world who mattered. You stayed because of the fleeting moments when she let her guard down, her fingers lingering on yours a second too long, her voice soft when she whispered your name.
And you stayed because of the promises.
“I just need time,” she’d say, her hand brushing a strand of hair from your face. “You understand, right?”
And you’d nod, swallowing the lump in your throat, because of course you understood. What else could you do? Tell her no? Walk away? The thought of losing her entirely was worse than the slow, aching heartbreak of being caught in her orbit.
But it was exhausting, being held at arm’s length while she continued to live her life exactly the way she wanted.
There were nights when she’d come over, late and unannounced, her hair still damp from the shower after a long practice. She’d climb into your bed, curling into your side like it was the most natural thing in the world, her hand slipping under your shirt to rest against your stomach.
“I missed you,” she’d murmur, her voice drowsy.
And for those moments, you’d believe her. You’d let yourself believe that she meant it, that maybe this time things would be different.
But the mornings always came.
She’d wake before you, slipping out of your bed as quietly as she’d slipped in. By the time you stirred, she’d be gone, her spot cold, the faint scent of her shampoo lingering on your pillow. She never left a note, never sent a text. You’d see her later that day, laughing with someone else, like the night before had been nothing more than a shared dream.
It wasn’t fair. You knew that. But Paige wasn’t the kind of person who played fair, at least not when it came to this. She played basketball like her life depended on it, with precision and purpose, but with you? She was reckless, careless, and sometimes it felt like she didn’t even realize it.
“You’re overthinking it,” she’d say when you finally mustered the courage to confront her, her tone light, dismissive. “We’re good, aren’t we?”
And every time, you’d cave. You’d tell her what she wanted to hear, because the alternative—calling her out, forcing her to make a choice—felt too dangerous.
So you kept waiting.
For the next stolen moment, the next broken promise, the next time she’d pull you in and push you away all over again.
It was a slow unraveling, and you didn’t know how much more you could take. But as much as you hated yourself for it, you knew one thing for sure:
You’d keep waiting. For her love. For her to choose you. For something you were terrified might never come.
The gym was cavernous, every dribble of the ball echoing like a drumbeat in your skull as you stormed in. You didn’t stop to think. Logic and restraint had abandoned you the second you saw the picture. Paige, her hands on someone else’s waist, her lips pressed to theirs in a way that made your stomach churn.
Her laugh was unmistakable even above the squeak of sneakers and the occasional shout from her teammates. It grated on you now, sharp and mocking. She didn’t see you at first. She was mid-layup, her ponytail flying behind her, the sweat on her brow catching the fluorescent lights. The picture was still fresh on your phone, the brightness of the screen almost taunting you.
You didn’t care who was watching.
“Paige!” you barked, your voice cutting through the gym’s rhythm like a knife.
The ball thudded against the floor, rolling away as she froze mid-turn. The laughter stopped. Heads turned.
Her eyes found yours, widening slightly before narrowing. A flicker of annoyance crossed her face—then something else. Panic? Regret? It didn’t matter.
She jogged over, wiping her hands on her shorts. “What are you doing here?” she hissed, keeping her voice low.
“What am I doing here?” Your laugh was humorless, loud enough for the whole team to hear. “What the hell are you doing, Paige?”
“Let’s talk outside.” Her voice was tight now, her eyes darting toward her teammates, who were whispering among themselves.
You ignored the way she grabbed your arm, the way her fingers pressed a little too hard against your skin as she dragged you toward the double doors. The moment you were outside, the cold air slapping your face, you yanked yourself free.
“I saw the picture,” you snapped.
“What picture?” Her face was the picture of practiced innocence, but her tone was wary.
“Don’t play dumb, Paige. You know exactly what I’m talking about. You were kissing her!”
Her jaw tightened, and her eyes flicked away for just a second—long enough for you to catch it. “It’s not what you think,” she said, her voice measured, like she was trying to calm a storm.
“Not what I think?” You could feel the heat rising in your chest, your hands trembling. “You had your hands all over her. What is there to think, Paige?”
She took a step closer, lowering her voice. “You’re making this a bigger deal than it is.”
“A bigger deal? Are you serious?” Your voice cracked, the anger spilling over, loud and raw. “You told me—no, you promised me—you weren’t seeing anyone else!”
“I’m not,” she shot back, her own voice rising now. “It was just a stupid kiss, alright? It didn’t mean anything.”
Your laugh was bitter, cutting. “It didn’t mean anything? Do you even hear yourself? You think that makes it better?”
Her frustration boiled over, her hands running through her hair as she paced a tight circle. “You’re acting like we’re in some committed relationship or something!”
The words hit you like a slap, your chest tightening as your breath caught. “So, what? This—us—it’s just nothing to you?”
“I didn’t say that!” she yelled, her voice echoing off the empty hallway. Her eyes blazed as she stepped closer, her finger pointing at you. “But you keep pushing me, and I don’t know what you want from me!”
“I want you to stop messing with my head!” Your voice cracked, raw and thick with something you couldn’t quite name. “You can’t keep pulling me in and then acting like I don’t exist whenever it’s convenient for you, Paige!”
She blinked, the words hitting her harder than you expected. For a moment, the anger on her face faltered, replaced by something softer, something you’d almost call guilt.
But just as quickly, her defenses snapped back into place. “I told you I needed space,” she said, her voice quieter but still edged with steel. “I told you from the start this wasn’t going to be easy.”
“Easy?” You shook your head, a humorless laugh bubbling up. “No, Paige, this isn’t hard—it’s cruel. You’re cruel.”
Her face fell, the anger draining from her expression. “I didn’t mean to hurt you,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.
But the words felt hollow, like a script she’d practiced too many times. Your fists clenched, nails digging into your palms, trying to anchor yourself in something, anything, besides the spiraling frustration.
“Yeah?” Your voice was low, trembling under the weight of restrained fury. “You didn’t mean to hurt me, Paige, but you knew. You knew how I felt—how I feel—and you kissed her anyway.”
Her eyes darted away, lips pressed into a tight line. “I told you this wasn’t... I told you I didn’t want anything serious.”
You laughed, sharp and bitter, the sound bouncing off the cold concrete walls. “No, you didn’t want anything serious, but you didn’t want to let me go either. You wanted me close enough to have whenever you felt like it, but not so close that you had to be accountable for it.”
“That’s not fair,” she snapped, her voice cutting through your words. She squared her shoulders, looking at you like you were the unreasonable one, like this was all spiraling because you couldn’t control your emotions. “You’re acting like I’m the bad guy when you’re the one who stormed into my practice and made a scene.”
“A scene?” Your voice rose, the sharp edge of disbelief slicing through the tension. “You kissed someone else, Paige. What the hell am I supposed to do? Just sit at home, pretend it didn’t happen, and wait for you to toss me a few scraps of affection when it’s convenient?”
“That’s not what this is!” she shouted, the crack in her voice betraying her frustration. “I didn’t mean for it to happen, alright? I didn’t plan it! God, why can’t you just trust me?”
“Trust you?” The words tore from you, laced with incredulity. “How the hell am I supposed to trust you when you do things like this and then try to make me feel crazy for reacting?”
“I’m not making you feel crazy!” she fired back, but the flicker of guilt in her eyes betrayed her. She stepped closer, her hands gesturing wildly as if she could will you to calm down. “I just... I didn’t think this would turn into... into this.”
“This?” Your voice broke, the vulnerability slipping through the cracks in your anger. “Paige, I let you have all of me. You knew that, and you’re acting like I’m the one who crossed a line.”
Her face softened for a split second, and you saw the Paige you thought you knew, the one who made you laugh so hard you cried, the one who looked at you like you were the most fascinating thing in the room.
But then she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I didn’t ask for this to get so complicated,” she muttered, almost to herself.
“Complicated?” The word fell from your lips like venom. “You made it complicated. You wanted me enough to keep me on a leash, but not enough to—”
“Stop,” she cut you off, her voice sharp. “Just stop. You’re spiraling, and you’re putting all of this on me like you don’t have a choice in any of it.”
The sheer audacity of her words made your chest tighten, heat flooding your face. “A choice? Paige, I chose you. I keep choosing you, even when it hurts.”
For a moment, you thought she might say something—an apology, an admission, anything to make this feel less like a freefall. Instead, she just stepped closer, her voice softening. “You’re overthinking this. You always do.”
Your body went rigid, the casual dismissal slicing through you like a blade. “Don’t do that,” you warned, your voice trembling. “Don’t make this about me being too much.”
“I’m not,” she said quickly, her tone too smooth, too rehearsed. “I’m just saying... maybe we’re both a little out of line here.”
“Out of line?” You scoffed, the hurt morphing back into anger, fueling the fire between you. “You kissed someone else, and I’m out of line for calling you out on it?”
Her jaw clenched, her shoulders squaring as her frustration boiled over. “What do you want me to say? That I’m sorry? That I’ll never do it again? Because I can’t promise that, alright? I can’t promise to be someone I’m not!”
The admission knocked the wind out of you, the raw honesty of it cutting deeper than any excuse ever could. You stared at her, your heart pounding so loud it drowned out everything else.
And then, without thinking, you grabbed her face and kissed her.
It wasn’t soft or tender—it was a collision of lips and teeth, anger and desperation crashing together in a way that felt like drowning and breathing at the same time.
She didn’t hesitate. Her hands found your waist, pulling you closer, her frustration melting into something else entirely. For a moment, the world disappeared—the hurt, the anger, the confusion—and all that was left was her, her lips moving against yours like she was trying to prove something, to take back control.
When you finally pulled apart, both of you were breathless, your foreheads pressed together.
“This doesn’t fix anything,” you whispered, your voice trembling.
Her lips brushed yours again, softer this time, almost apologetic. “I know,” she murmured.
But it didn’t stop her, or you, from letting it happen again. And again. And again.
This was the beginning of a vicious style. Paige would do something — something reckless or selfish or dismissive, something that cracked the fragile balance you were barely holding together. You would crash out, spinning into anger or heartbreak or desperation. Then, when the storm was at its peak, you’d collide in a mess of kisses and tangled limbs, pretending the hurt didn’t exist. And for a little while, it would work.
Rinse, repeat.
It was like a drug. The highs were euphoric — the way she’d whisper your name in the dark, the way her hands knew the map of your body like they’d been there a thousand lifetimes. But the lows were brutal. Paige wasn’t just in your life; she engulfed it. Even when she wasn’t physically there, she was everywhere — in your thoughts, in your chest, in the hollow ache that came from wanting more than she would ever give.
And yet, every time you told yourself this was the last time, she’d reel you back in.
It was always the same. She’d make promises she couldn’t keep. I’ll do better. I’ll be better. I don’t want to lose you. They were just words, fragile and insubstantial, but you clung to them like a lifeline. Because even if Paige didn’t love you the way you needed her to, she made you feel.
But feelings weren’t enough. Not when the cycle kept repeating, each round leaving you a little more frayed, a little less whole.
Looking back, you didn’t see it at first. How could you? In those early days, it all still felt new, like you were learning each other in ways no one else ever had. The tension, the passion, even the arguments — it all felt alive.
But what you didn’t know then was that this wasn’t building toward something better. It wasn’t growth or healing or progress. It was just a loop, and the more you gave, the more it took.
And it all started here — in a practice gym with her teammates staring after you, with a kiss that should have been an apology but felt more like a warning.
This was how it was going to be. You just didn’t know it yet.
It was over long before she said it. That was the truth you’d been carrying for weeks, maybe even months, like a stone in your chest. The late nights tangled together, the whispered promises that never quite landed, the explosive fights that burned hot and fast — they were all just delaying the inevitable.
Paige didn’t love you. Not the way you loved her.
And even though you’d told yourself a hundred times that you’d walk away first, that you’d save yourself the heartbreak, there was a part of you that had been waiting for this moment. Waiting for her to finally say the words so you wouldn’t have to.
When she said them, she was sitting on the edge of the bed, her hair messy and her lips still swollen from the argument-turned-kiss that had just played out like a broken record. Her voice was quiet, careful, like she thought if she said it gently enough, it wouldn’t hurt.
“I think we should just stay friends.”
Friends. As if that word hadn’t already been stretched beyond recognition between the two of you.
You didn’t cry. You didn’t yell. You didn’t say anything at all. You just nodded, a single dip of your head that felt like letting go of a thousand unspoken words.
Because by then, you were too tired to argue. Too numb to care. You’d given everything you had to Paige Bueckers — your heart, your time, your trust. And in the end, she’d left you with nothing but empty promises and the ache of what could have been.
She watched you, her expression unreadable, maybe expecting a reaction. But there was nothing left to give. No anger, no tears, not even the kind of hope that had once kept you tethered to her.
And that’s when you knew.
It had been over long before it was over.
The first few days after Paige walked away, you told yourself you were fine. Numbness had a way of masquerading as strength, and for a brief, fleeting moment, you believed it. You went about your routine mechanically, ignoring the ghost of her laugh that seemed to echo in every corner of your mind, or the phantom sensation of her fingertips trailing down your skin.
But it didn’t last.
The cracks began to show in the quiet moments, the ones you couldn’t fill with distractions. You’d see her everywhere — not in person, but in the lingering memories that clung to every inch of your life. The way she used to leave her hoodie draped over your chair. The playlist she made you that now sat like a ticking time bomb on your phone. Even the way the air smelled after it rained reminded you of her, of those late-night walks when the world felt small and it was just the two of you against everything.
Now, it was just you.
The nights were the worst. That was when the realization hit hardest, settling in your chest like a lead weight. She wasn’t coming back. And not only that, she seemed fine. Perfectly fine without you.
Social media became your own personal form of torture. Paige smiling with her teammates, Paige at practice, Paige at a party with her arm slung casually around someone else’s shoulders. She looked radiant, unbothered. And why wouldn’t she be? You were the one left unraveling, trying to pick up the pieces of something that had already been broken long before it officially ended.
You tried to bury yourself in distractions, in work, in friends, in anything that could occupy the space she used to fill. But nothing worked. Everywhere you turned, there she was, in your mind, in your heart, like she had embedded herself into the very fabric of your being.
The worst part was the silence. Paige hadn’t reached out — not once. Not to check on you, not to see if you were okay, not even to pretend that she cared. She had moved on seamlessly, like you were just a chapter she had finished reading. But you? You were stuck. Stuck rereading the same lines over and over, trying to figure out where it all went so wrong.
You hated her for it. And you hated yourself more for still wanting her, for craving the sound of her voice even when it was the last thing you should want to hear.
Sleep became elusive. You’d lie awake, staring at the ceiling, replaying every argument, every kiss, every unspoken promise. Your mind refused to let go, clinging to the hope that maybe, just maybe, this wasn’t the end. But deep down, you knew better. Paige had already moved on. And she wasn’t coming back.
It was a cruel kind of clarity, realizing how little you seemed to matter to her now. While you were drowning, she was breathing just fine.
And so, you began to sink. Not all at once, but slowly, steadily, as the days turned into weeks and the weight of her absence pressed down on you. You stopped checking your phone, stopped looking at her social media, stopped pretending you were okay. Because you weren’t. You were a mess, and she was gone, and there was no fixing what had been broken.
For the first time, you understood what it meant to lose yourself in someone. Paige had taken pieces of you when she left, pieces you weren’t sure you’d ever get back. And as much as you hated it, as much as you hated her for making you feel this way, you couldn’t deny the truth.
You still loved her. And that was the hardest part of all.
The first time you saw the picture, it felt like the air had been knocked out of your lungs. Paige stood there, her arm draped casually over a girl you didn’t recognize, her smile so effortlessly carefree it made your stomach churn. It wasn’t just the picture—it was what it represented.
She wasn’t hiding anymore.
For months, you had clung to the idea that Paige’s reluctance to be with you had been about timing, about her career, about her focus on basketball. You’d told yourself over and over that it wasn’t about you—that she wasn’t ready for anything, not just you. But seeing her like this, so at ease, so perfectly content in someone else’s arms, shattered that illusion into a thousand irreparable pieces.
It wasn’t that she wasn’t ready. She just didn’t want you.
The realization hit you harder than any of the fights, any of the cold silences, any of the times she had pushed you away only to pull you back in. This was different. This was final. And it sent you crashing in a way you hadn’t thought possible.
The next few days passed in a haze. You couldn’t bring yourself to eat, to sleep, to function like a normal person. Every time you closed your eyes, the image of her with that girl played on a loop in your mind. Her hand resting on her shoulder. The easy grin that you used to think was just for you. The sickening thought that this new girl got the version of Paige you’d always wanted but could never have.
Your friends tried to help. They texted, called, even showed up at your apartment uninvited, but nothing seemed to pull you out of the spiral. You were stuck, trapped in the memories of what could have been, haunted by the ghost of what never was.
And Paige? She was fine. She was more than fine. While you were unraveling, she was out there, living her life like nothing had happened, like you had never happened.
It wasn’t fair.
You replayed every moment in your head, dissecting every word, every touch, every promise she had made and broken. You thought about the nights she’d held you, the mornings when she’d whispered things you now realized she didn’t mean. You thought about the times she’d called you "important," like that word was supposed to mean something, like it was enough to keep you tethered to her while she gave you nothing in return.
The more you thought about it, the angrier you got. Not just at Paige, but at yourself. How had you let it get this far? How had you let her take so much of you, only to leave you with nothing?
But even as the anger simmered beneath the surface, it couldn’t erase the pain. Because no matter how much she hurt you, no matter how many times she let you down, a part of you still wanted her. You hated yourself for it, but it was the truth.
She was the love of your life—or at least, that’s what you had convinced yourself. And now, as you watched her move on so effortlessly, it felt like you had lost not just her, but a part of yourself.
You thought about the nights you’d spent together, the dreams you’d secretly dared to have, the way she had made you feel like the center of her universe, even if it was only for a fleeting moment. You thought about the way she’d look at you sometimes, like you were the only person in the room, and you wondered if she ever looked at her new girlfriend like that.
The jealousy burned, but it was nothing compared to the ache of knowing you weren’t enough.
And that was the hardest part. Not the fights, not the breakups, not even seeing her with someone else. The hardest part was realizing that no matter how much you loved her, it was never going to be enough. She was gone, and she wasn’t coming back.
But you still saw her everywhere. In the songs that played on the radio. In the basketball games you couldn’t bring yourself to watch anymore. In the small, stupid things that reminded you of her—like the way she used to steal the last piece of pizza or the way she’d hum under her breath when she thought no one was listening.
You wanted to hate her, to erase her from your mind and move on with your life. But how could you hate the person who had been your everything, even if only for a little while?
So you sat with the pain, let it wash over you like a tidal wave, drowning in the memories of a love that had never really been yours. And for the first time, you let yourself admit the truth: Paige had been the loss of your life. And no amount of time, no amount of distance, was ever going to change that.
PRESENT
You’re standing there, caught in the pull of her gaze, the space between you both charged with unspoken words. It feels like you’ve been here a thousand times before, standing on the edge, your heart teetering between wanting to stay and knowing you should walk away.
Paige’s hand still grips your wrist, and the simple touch feels like a tether. A lifeline. But you know better than to think it’s something more. She’s always been like this—holding on just enough to make you feel wanted, but never enough to pull you all the way in.
“Are you really fine?” she asks, her voice lower now, softer, like she’s trying to break through your walls. Her thumb moves in slow, deliberate circles against your skin, and for a brief moment, you feel the weight of the last few months—how everything has spiraled, how much you've tried to hold it all together.
You want to scream, to ask her why it’s always been this way, why she makes you feel like you’re the one losing the fight when you never even had a chance to begin with. But instead, you swallow it all down, pushing the rawness deep inside, out of sight.
“I’m fine,” you repeat, and this time, it sounds almost like a plea. A hope that if you say it enough, you’ll start to believe it.
Paige doesn’t let go. She studies your face like she’s looking for something—some crack in the surface that would make everything make sense.
You hate how easily she does it. How she makes you feel like you could fall apart right here, and she’d still somehow be the one holding it all together.
But she’s not the one holding the pieces anymore.
“Don’t do that,” Paige says, her voice a little rougher now, her grip tightening just slightly. “Don’t close off from me. We’ve never been good at that.”
You can’t help the bitter laugh that escapes you. “We’ve never been good at anything,” you snap, but the words feel too raw, too real for this moment.
She flinches, just barely, but you see it. You see the way her shoulders tense, the way her jaw clenches. It’s a reaction you’re so used to by now—the shift in her, the way she pulls back whenever you push too hard, whenever you force her to confront the mess between you two.
But this time, there’s something else in her eyes. Something you can’t quite place. Maybe it’s guilt, or maybe it’s regret. But it’s there, lurking beneath the surface, and it stirs something in you.
“I didn’t mean that,” you add quickly, your voice softer now, almost apologetic. But the damage is already done. The walls between you, the ones you’ve spent months building and reinforcing, are beginning to crumble.
Paige shakes her head, a wry smile tugging at her lips. “You never do.”
You don’t know what to say to that. The truth is, you’ve always known. You’ve always known that Paige was never going to be the one who could fix this. Fix you.
“I’m sorry,” she says after a beat, and the words hang in the air between you like a promise you both know she can’t keep.
It’s the same thing she’s always said. The same thing she said when she left. The same thing she said when she came back. And each time, it meant less and less.
You swallow hard, blinking away the sting in your eyes. “It’s fine,” you whisper, but the words feel hollow. Because it isn’t fine. It never will be.
Paige looks like she’s about to say something, but she doesn’t. Instead, she leans in, her lips brushing against your cheek in a fleeting, soft kiss.
It’s nothing. It’s everything.
And just like that, everything falls back into place, if only for a moment. She pulls away, her hand still around your wrist, keeping you there, keeping you close—but not close enough.
You don’t know what’s worse: the way she makes you feel like you’re everything she’s ever wanted, or the way she makes you feel like you were never really a part of her at all.
You look into her eyes one last time, and for a moment, you see something there—something that makes you think maybe, just maybe, she feels it too.
But before you can get lost in it, she’s already pulling back, walking away. And you’re left standing there, once again, at the edge of it all.
The gym feels cold now. The bouncing basketballs echo through the space like the rhythm of your own heartbeat—distant, unsteady, and out of sync with everything else.
And in that moment, you realize something.
You’re never going to be okay with this. Not really.
But you’ll keep pretending, even if she has a girlfriend. Even if you've "moved on". Because that’s all you know how to do.
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NNN - chris sturniolo - long distances
You and Chris had been together for a little over a year, content with one another and the company each of you had to bring.
Before hand — you were good friends, best friends to be exact. Not with just him, but with his brothers too, and it was nice to know nothing really changed after putting a label on the two of you.
Chris and his brothers were already in their filming career when you had gotten together — making videos and posting them twice a week for their fan base that was already growing so large within a short amount of time.
Though, one day, while cuddled up with chris on your couch at your home — he broke the news to you.
He was moving to LA with Matt and Nick. Having already made enough money to afford a nice little place there. It was shocking to hear, and at first you were upset — upset with the fact you couldn’t see him everyday and you wouldn’t be around him when you needed him or wanted him.
But, the upset had been replaced with excitement over time. Thinking of all the possibilities for Chris and how amazing it was that he was able to do this with his brothers. And of all the stories you would be able to hear about his new life in a busy and bustling city.
When the day had finally come for him to move — it was spent with tears and hugs and promises to one another that everything would be okay.
And for the most part it was, you called every night — texted each other too many times through out the day and stayed connected. But, at some point things started to change. Chris grew more busy with work and with his clothing line he was starting, and the absence made you feel empty. Like he wasn’t even really there.
There were less calls, more messages being left on read or delivered — but Chris at least would tell you when he was busy and couldn’t talk, which you appreciated.
Eventually, everything began to weigh down on you. And you needed to tell him — needed to let him know how you were feeling. That you were having doubts.
-
Your room was quiet except for the faint hum of your laptop. Chris’ face filled the screen, his familiar features bathed in the soft light of his LA room. He looked tired, his curls messier than usual and his celtics hoodie hanging loosely on his frame. You tried to ignore the hollow ache in your chest as you smiled at him.
“How was your day?” you asked, forcing a casual tone as your eyes looked around your screen, taking in the view you’ve seen hundreds of times already.
Chris shrugged, leaning back against his chair. “Same as usual. Filmed with Nick and Matt, ran some errands. We tried this new sushi place for dinner. It was good, but, uh… not as good as Boston sushi.”
You let out a soft laugh, even though it stung a little. “Boston sushi is definitely better. How’s the apartment coming along?” you asked — a question that would slip here and there.
Chris shrugged slightly. “Fine, I guess. Still trying to figure out where to put everything. Matt thinks we need more stuff on the walls, but Nick keeps saying we don’t. It’s a whole thing.” He gave a faint smile, his voice lacking its usual warmth. “What about you? How was work?”
“Busy,” you said simply, picking at the edge of your blanket. “Came home, made dinner… I made too much again. I keep forgetting I’m just cooking for one now.” you admitted. Being so used to his presence all the time, you often made dinner for two people — it was still a hard adjustment.
Chris’ smile faltered, guilt flashing in his eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said softly.
You shook your head quickly, brushing it off. “It’s not your fault. I just need to get used to it still — even if it’s been a little.”
The conversation then faded into silence, and for a moment, all you could hear was the faint rustle of Chris adjusting his laptop. He looked away, his jaw tense, and you felt the words building in your chest — words you’d been too scared to say for weeks right on the tip of your tongue.
It was now or never.
“Chris,” you began hesitantly, your voice barely above a whisper. “Can we… uhm - can we talk about us?” the words slipping past your lips felt like a burn on your own tongue.
His gaze snapped back to you, his expression guarded. “What about us?”
You hesitated, the lump in your throat making it hard to speak. “I just… I feel like things have been different lately. At first, we were doing so well — texting all the time, FaceTiming every night. But now… I don’t know. It feels like we’re drifting apart.”
Chris’s brows furrowed at your words, his shoulders visibly tensing. “I’ve noticed it too,” he admitted after a pause. “I just didn’t know how to bring it up. I didn’t want to make things worse.”
You blinked, surprised by his honesty. “You didn’t think I’d feel the same?”
“I don’t know,” he said, running a hand through his curls. “I didn’t want to say anything and make you think I was doubting us or something. And I’m not. I love you. But this…” He gestured vaguely, his hand moving between him and the screen. “This is hard. Harder than I thought it’d be.”
The crack in his voice made your heart ache, but you nodded, tears stinging the corner of your eyes. “It is hard. I miss you so much, Chris. Some nights, it’s all I can think about — how empty this place feels without you here. And then I start wondering… what if we can’t do this? What if it’s too much?”
Chris’s eyes widened slightly, his panic evident. “Wait, are you saying you want to—”
“No!” you interrupted quickly, shaking your head. “No — Chris, that’s not what I mean. I just… I don’t know how to fix this. And I hate feeling like we’re not as close as we used to be.”
Chris let out a slow breath, his shoulders slumping. “I feel the same way,” he said quietly. “I hate that I can’t just drive over and see you when you’ve had a bad day. I hate that I can’t be there to hold you. And honestly… sometimes, I feel like I’m letting you down.”
“You’re not,” you said firmly, leaning closer to the screen. “Chris, you’re doing the best you can. We both are. But we need to be honest with each other if we’re going to make this work.”
He nodded slowly, his jaw tightening as he processed your words. “You’re right. I’ve been holding back because I didn’t want to make things worse, but… I guess that’s only made things harder. I’ve missed you so much, and it’s been killing me not to tell you how much I’ve been struggling with this.”
Tears now spilled down your cheeks, and you wiped them away quickly with your sleeve. “I’ve been struggling too. And I was scared to tell you because… what if it made you think I didn’t believe in us anymore? I do, Chris. I love you so much. I just… I didn’t know how to deal with all of this on my own.”
His expression softened, and he leaned closer to the camera, his voice gentle. “You don’t have to deal with it alone, okay? We’re in this together. And if that means being brutally honest about how much this sucks sometimes, then that’s what we’ll do.”
You laughed softly through your tears, nodding. “Deal. And… maybe we can try to plan our visits better. I need to see you, Chris. I think that’ll help a lot.” you whispered, feeling yourself ease up a little at the thought of him here — with you.
His lips quirked into a small smile. “Funny you should say that… I’ve been looking at flights to Boston. I was going to surprise you, but… maybe we need this sooner rather than later. I’ll come next month. No excuses.”
“Really?” you asked, your heart swelling with hope.
“Really,” he said, his smile growing. “I need to hold you again. And I’ll do whatever it takes to make this work.”
A weight lifted from your chest, and you smiled for what felt like the first time in weeks. “I’ll hold you to that,” you teased, your voice lighter.
Chris chuckled, the sound warming your heart. “I love you. And no matter how hard this gets, I’m not giving up on us. Ever.”
“I love you too,” you said softly. “And I promise… I’ll do everything I can to make this work too.”
It wasn’t a perfect solution, but it was a start. The rest of the night felt lighter — the ache in your chest still present but less. You both were more cheerful — joking around about random things and teasing him about how his hair was too messy — along with his room.
You smiled at your screen, watching as Chris did the same. His hand coming up to his lips and blowing you a kiss through the screen — and you blushed.
You’re just hoping that whatever was said tonight…was going to stick.
© strnilolover
#ᯓ★ strnilolover#nnn#no nut november#chris sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo x you#chris sturniolo x reader#christopher sturniolo x you#christopher sturniolo x reader#chris sturniolo imagine#chris x reader#chris sturniolo angst#chris sturniolo fanfic#chris sturniolo blurb#christopher sturniolo angst#sturniolo#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo triplets x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo imagine#sturniolo angst#sturniolo triplets angst#angst#hurt/comfort#happy ending#long distance relationship#relationship issues
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I think a big misunderstanding is the power people give Curly to actually change things about the way the pony express operates or could’ve done things on the Tulpar.
We are talking about a company that docks pay for bad synergy despite mandated psych evals that should tell which staff members would work well together, only allots for 5 hours of sleep despite having literally no other tasks to truly do and locks all resources behind the access of one person. The last one is likely to manage resources and make it easier to justify collective punishment and blaming one person for it; someone needs something in “excess” or the captain gives in? It’s all on them your pay is docked. Instant resentment.
It’s insidious how the company works, it’s by design to distract you from coming after them, to force tensions to line their own pockets. With all the restrictions and forced interactions, altercations are bound to happen. 5 hours of sleep a day, limited sources of entertainment, no real tasks… the monotony alone would cause bad cabin fever, mix that with just only one absolute mediator and you get the exact environment that allows shit like in the game to happen.
The idea he could just complain and try to throw his weight around to get them to dig into their pocket for the crews comfort is laughable and misses the predatory and dehumanizing aspect of capitalism the Pony Express represents. Curly was and is still just another asset to them. Being a top show pony doesn’t mean he’s anywhere close to the actual top. He is the top of the working ladder, not whoever’s in corporate, he wouldn’t even be on the bottom step unlike what Jimmy perceives. The resounding recommendations he would get are almost mocking as they throw him out like nothing just like the rest. Being a shitty fucking company, how much do you bet they’d mean anything anyways, especially since he wanted to leave the field all together.
He made a fuss and they didn’t listen, he says he should’ve done more but you can tell he knows it wouldn’t have changed anything. Jobs like this are willing to make a sacrifice if it means even a penny more. Curly makes a bigger fuss they likely would’ve just found an “unrelated” reason to fire him, hired a more pliable guy or, terrifyingly, promoted Jimmy. The company was failing, going to shut down whether anything happened on the ship or not. But knowing that they were shutting down and that everyone, including him, would be out of a job with this being their last paycheck, he had to factor in not destroying the last bit of their financial stabilities combined with every other issue on the vessel and his own. He gets another cryopod or locks and then he has to break to them that they are not only fired but there will be substantial cuts to their paychecks due to the “upgrades” (things that already should’ve been in place on their part) on top of anything else that could be docked along the way.
You can blame him for saying it so early into the trip but then again, if he mentioned it later who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse? On the capitalism side alone how would people in a galaxy away from home, out of a job and already stir crazy react? Don’t get me started on how Jimmy would have reacted if he realized he only had two days left to fix what would be a very hard to miss “problem” in his head…
I can’t even consider explaining this as devils advocate because it’s just facts of the world we and they live in and factors that heavily affected the situation. People are just so quick to make claims on the ease of the choices when P.E literally makes it hard to choose to do anything but suck it up.
#this is also like a sort of point that while I wanted Curly to do more for Anya I realized he would have to jeaporsiE the crews safety in#some way like if they needed the cryopods one person would be left without one and like it would be curly he’d offer but don’t think any of#them would be happy or feel okay with letting him die over a rapist? he kills Jimmy and now he has to stand trial and be arrested for murder#because it’s not self defense or manslaughter like they could obviously lie but he wouldn’t let them do that in case of a sort of black box#or guilt on their mind specifically with Daisuke who would likely be kept out of the loop not to mention it’s a dead body with a limited#likely recycled air supply so again he’s getting tried for murder and they are down a cryopod#not to mentions again the fact that you need a copilot like I know like aviation law and shit is crazy and like not common knowledge#but you bed a second set of eyes or someone to trade off with so you don’t loose ur concentration or doze and crash#like they don’t just sit their and do nothing like Jimmy probably did some of the time cause Curly likely didn’t want to make him#cause like pissed off and spiteful Jimmy manning the controls even if just helping is not something he wants to deal with and risk their#lives but i digress I genuinely think the biggest flaw of Curly’s in the situation is being a man who could not handle or understand the#emotional gravity of what Anya experienced especially at the hands of someone who he was also#emotonal/mentally mistreated by and wanted to so badly to believe was his friend and improving#like he did not offer her enough or the proper emotional/physical security he could’ve as a captain nor friend but in that it goes right#back to the systems at play that make it so he isn’t meant or supposed to understand so it can’t be perpetuated and blah blah blah how many#times do I have to explain systematic oppression to certain groups in this fandom and it isn’t cut n dry of good guys bad guys and victims#as outliers of the tow categories l#mouthwashing#captain curly#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#the pony express#The Tulpar
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Title: Pure as Honey, Twice as Tart Pairing: Bakugou x Reader Includes: virginity loss, corruption kink, miscommunication PB’s Masterlist
Your touch graced his skin once more – from his neck to his shoulder and down his naked chest. He sat still and tense underneath you, his hands haphazardly placed on your lower back. Gentle and timid. Much different than how you thought this would go. You pulled away from the kiss, pecking his nose lightly as you pulled away from him to speak.
“Katsuki?”
He stared back up at you through his eyelashes, brow furrowed deep, as it typically was. However, this was different than his usual scowl. Hesitance graced his features.
“What?” He grouched.
“You can touch me some more.”
Katsuki’s hands seemed to twitch, flexing around your body and pulling you further against him. “I–! I know that!” His grip lessened then, moving to your hips. Reflexively, or intent on teasing, your hips rolled against his, feeling his erection through his sweatpants. You felt him clear as day through the fabric, thick and hard, and pressing against your underwear. With how prominent the pressure against you felt, you were almost certain he wasn’t wearing any boxers. He pressed his face against your shoulder, almost like he was hiding, and he stifled a groan at the friction. You giggled, one of your hands finding its place in his hair.
“I mean like this,” you had grabbed one of his own hands and placed it on your bare breast. Katsuki pulled back to gawk at the squishy mound in his palm. He didn’t dare move at all; he simply held it.
“…Katsuki?”
“What?” Gruff, and yet, he couldn’t tear his eyes away from the tit in his hand.
“Is this your first time?”
At that, he finally seemed to be aware of having a naked woman in his lap. His ears were beet-red, the heat spreading down the back of his neck underneath your fingertips. Katsuki’s lips were sealed shut, reluctant to say anything for a change.
He started to pull away then. That’s it. It was done. The night’s over, time for you to go home.
That’s okay. You were patient. Or impatient.
You pushed back against him, but Katsuki’s hand had already fallen off your breast, and now you were just sitting in his lap.
Katsuki didn’t say anything at first, and you could see the turmoil and embarrassment behind his eyes. He was quiet. Katsuki’s a quieter man than you expected. He seemed to be waiting for you to take the lead, but he wouldn’t dare tell you that. He stared at you, at your body, expectantly. You gently took hold of his hand, bringing it back up to the breast he was holding. This was your way of telling him that it was okay to continue. That he didn’t do anything wrong. That he was doing a good job. That he was the one you wanted.
Katsuki stared at your breast in his hand and ran his thumb over your nipple, almost absentmindedly, like he was testing the waters. Or his finger was moving about curiously as he pondered your question. Either way, you wanted to encourage him – Katsuki was always a sucker for praise – and made him comfortable. You bit your lip to hide a devious smile.
Your back arched, pushing your chest further into his hand and let out a moan that you’d only ever hear in pornography. Okay, maybe it was a little dramatic for just having your nipple touched. However, Katsuki’s eyes widened immensely at the sound, looking up at your face. You don’t think you’ve ever seen him look so astounded.
“That… That felt good?” It’s not often Katsuki seemed so unsure of himself. You nodded, reaching to pull his other hand up to your other breast. Katsuki held a tit in each hand, his wild eyes flittering between each of them and your eyes. He experimentally ran his thumbs over your nipples, a little more confident than before, and you gave him a show. Your back arched a little more, and you let out another moan, trying to encourage him to do more, touch more.
Katsuki chewed on his bottom lip at the sight. He honestly looked a little crazy with his bugged-out eyes. You had to hold back a giggle because the instant you make him feel insecure or like he wasn’t doing a good job, all of this would stop, and he would shut down for the rest of the week. Katsuki was a fearsome Pro Hero, but he could be rather childish when it came to his hurt pride.
You kissed him again. He was a little needier this time, almost as if he was falling victim to his lust. His ministrations on your breasts were becoming tiresome; his rough fingers moved the same ways, and your body was growing too tolerant of his touch for it to mean anything anymore. You gently cupped his larger hand and brought it down between your legs. You thought Katsuki was going to pass out.
He overcame, though. He watched his own hand, touching you through the fabric of your underwear with a hot blush on his cheeks and neck. His hands were one of the most attractive parts of him, in your opinion; however, right now, you were becoming frustrated with their lack of experience. The rough pads of his fingertips pressed awkwardly on your labia, seeming to be searching for… something… Katsuki glanced up at your face to gauge your reactions.
Unfortunately, you didn’t look pleased enough, and Katsuki took it personally.
“What? It’s… It’s here, isn’t it?” He sounded so unsure of himself, and it made you want to eat him up. Katsuki was frustrated that he had no clear vision of what to do right now. It was so different compared to any of his previous triumphs where he picked up on a task quickly and excelled. There was hesitance here — something he’s not used to experiencing.
You got off of him, then, and Katsuki’s nipples perked at how chilly the room was without your body pressed against his. You giggled, lying down on your back and peeling your underwear off. Katsuki’s cheeks flushed bright pink as he stared directly between your legs. You reached up and grabbed his wrist, pulling him closer.
“Like this…,” you guided his pointer finger to your clitoris. Katsuki’s eyes widened as you let out an exaggerated moan and bit your lip. You brought your other hand down to grip his wrist, contorting his fingers the way you wanted them. “You’re doing so good…,” you were good at pretending to already be breathless, even though all he was doing was flicking your clit.
Katsuki ate it up, though. He swelled with pride at your praise, his cherry-red eyes flickering between your cunt and your face. He became a little adventurous and dipped a finger inside of you. You keened, spreading your legs wider for him. Katsuki’s cock swelled painfully in his sweatpants, and it was getting difficult for him to ignore it. The rough cotton of his sweatpants was getting itchy against his sensitive skin, and you could see the frustration on his face. One of your hands traveled over to his waistband, and you watched his face carefully. To your surprise, he actually jolted away from you.
Katsuki’s never liked being touched. It took him so long to get used to holding hands, and even still, he preferred to walk alongside you; he only really became touchy when around a group of guys or in a large crowd.
You weren’t offended. He was fingering you, pumping his single digit in your warm cunt slowly and carefully, so you didn’t think it was ludicrous to ask him: “Katsuki, can I touch you?”
Katsuki looked bewildered. He was so shocked that you could so easily ask to… He was much more of a prude than people took him for. You began to wonder why you were so surprised that he was a virgin, now than you thought about it. He always looked uncomfortable during sex scenes in movies, and he never liked PDA – seeing it or engaging in it.
Katsuki stuttered, “Yeah…”
You wrapped your fingers around his waistband, your gaze focused on his very noticeable tent, and you gently pulled his sweatpants down his hips. You’ve seen him soft before – by accident, you don’t think he even knows – but this was a whole different deal. You couldn’t stop yourself from running a finger over the bead of precum on his slit. Katsuki hissed at the sensation, tensing. His finger had long stopped moving and was simply resting inside of you like a wine cork. You watched his face as you lightly wrapped your hand around his shaft, stroking gently. His cock was hot to the touch, red and angry. His balls sagged, but every once in a while, one of them would tense up, almost like they were itching to release.
“Baby, keep fingering me,” you voiced, and Katsuki blushed, embarrassed that he paused his movements. He’s typically so good at multitasking. He couldn’t help but huff; he was failing you.
Katsuki pulled his finger out and jammed it back in. You gasped, or more like yelped. When you made that noise, Katsuki pulled back altogether, removing himself from you and your touch. He was cursing himself, ashamed that he couldn’t just get. It. Right.
“Katsuki, it’s okay. Here,” you reached out to grab his wrist, to try and guide him once more, but he yanked it away.
“No,” came the harsh reply. He turned away from you, glaring at the wall. He didn’t want you to see his face. You knew he was embarrassed beyond belief, but his ego was getting in the way. He needs to learn how to fail before he can get better at something. He needs to let you teach him.
“Katsuki, I can show you,” you pacify him, sitting up. Katsuki rolled his eyes and kept his head turned away from you as you sit closer to him.
“No. It… I’m not into it. Not tonight,” he snaps. He had pulled his sweatpants back up at some point between when he pulled away and now, but you knew his statement was as false as it gets. He was still hard as a rock. You were quiet for a minute, letting the silence talk for you both.
Before you can argue with him, Katsuki stands up and heads to the bedroom door with his hands in his pockets.
Without looking back, he says, “You… I’ll take you home if you want.”
You sit back on the bed, frazzled. This is what he does. He withdraws into himself. He shuts you out. He ‘messed’ something up in his head. Something went wrong. It wasn’t perfect. He wasn’t perfect. Now you’re paying the price for it.
#katsuki bakugou x reader#bakugou katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugou#bakugou x reader#katsuki x reader#mha#bnha#mha x reader
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All caught up ! ☆
Wk - 3.6k I got carried away with the plot instead of the pron
Nerd!kento x Mean bimbo!reader | female reader | soft dom! Nanami | college au |
Note : my brain so rotted , need nerd bf starts to bite on the bars of my enclosure .. some conversation based off of irl stuff lwk lwk lwk starts to bite the walls 🤭
you never thought all that much about studying or being academically successful, smart wasn’t something people would describe you as. You weren’t too upset by this fact because everyone says , “college isn’t like high school bleh bleh bleh” , “this attitude will have to change in college meh meh meh”
Well that attitude got you to be the sorority president of Nu Zeta . Okay so did you actually give a fuck about popularity or being the Regina George? No … buttttt since the academics are lacking , being the president of the most popular sorority at college looks just as good on your resume… probably…
You majored in business but you didn’t know it would be such a sausage fest ! And don’t get started on the guys that are there . They’re in total nerds or like try hard wannabe jocks that never went D1 and try to impress you even though they tore their acl and are super insecure about it.
But one is different, normally the silent nerd types always seem to be the biggest manipulative , nasty , cheating SLUTSSS..but kento nanami .. he was different . You’d never share this admiration to his face because you don’t wanna inflate his ego . More than it probably already is because he’s a big nerd yeah but like he makes it sooooo hot ?????
The only chance you get to see him is class since like he’s a total recluse hermit type and doesn’t show up to parties..not that HE would ever be invited , but stillllll .
You’ve never spoken to him per say , a couple of snarky comments he might’ve heard but that’s it . Until , today you had to get a partner for a mock pretend business that you had to write about and do a PowerPoint on to be graded on and yadayadayadaaaa . You just figured your professor would put you with someone but he said to make things more interesting you had to pick someone who you would actually want to invest in a business with.
You assumed you’d just pick on of the minority of girls since girls stick together but then like a miracle from the higher above , you heard a man clear his throat behind you . “Excuse me , y/n” . A voice you didn’t hear often but you still swung your head around to listen to , then you locked eyes with the stoic , quiet , embarrassingly nerdy Kento Nanami. You raised your eyebrow , his face began to flush as your gaze burned into him . Clearly he didn’t think this through all the way. “I was just thinking..you know this project you will get an easy grade if you work with me since I practically get A’s on everything…like I have a 95% average”
The corners of your glossed lips began to curl into a smile , “are you trying to pitch yourself so I’ll work with you?” Your eyes fixated on his tired hazel eyes that were shielded by his stupid nerd glasses .. that made him really cute too. He furrowed his brow and stammered , “well, it’s just that to be a sorority president you have to keep on top with your grades so I wouldn’t want you to fall behind since you know you’re not the best academically” . You scoffed at him , “excuse me?” He nervously gripped at his desk with clammy hands , “no- that’s not what I meant. I just wanted to help. I can be of good use” . You grinned at him , “you want me to use you?” .
His eyes widened before he shook his head once more , “I meant in the context of-“ “whatever blondie, I can’t have you snoop around my sorority who knows what kind of pervert you are so I’ll just come to your place Friday night, yeah?” You smiled at him once more before pulling up your phone number and holding your phone up to him . To which he quickly scribbled down your number , pushing his glasses up , “Friday is good” he gave you a flushed half smile before you turned your back to him and collected your stuff and leaving your class. Isn’t he just the cutest?
As you sat around in the lounge with some of your sorority sisters your phone buzzed , normally notifications didn’t bother you since you’d hear the same buzz many times throughout the day . But the message on your screen peaked your interest.
unknown number : hey this is Kento Nanami, the one from your business class. You called me blondie. You might remember me as that.
You : omgggg blondie
Blondie : You can just say my name too..
You : nahhhh it’s better so people won’t know I associate with business nerds LOLLLLL
blondie : you don’t want to be associated with me? Should I not include my name on our project?
You : LOLLLL ur so cute I was jk
Blondie : I see, my mistake.
You : wtvvrrrr wyd rn blondie
Blondie : brainstorming ideas for our project and well studying. I don’t really do much else really.
You : show me send me ur snap
Blondie : snap?
You : snapchat? R u Amish do you not know what snap is?
Blondie : I don’t really use social media , haha .
You : could tell
You : make a Snapchat account!!!! I luv sending snaps it’s fun
Blondie : okay. I have made one , it is kento.nanami
You : kk !!!
You got so wrapped up in the conversation you even convinced this nerd to download Snapchat. You even giggled at how formal he texted , “what’re you laughing at y/n?? Are you watching insta reels?” One of your nosey sorority sisters asked as she pressed to your side wanting to watch Instagram reels with you , “nopee not right now lia I’ll send you some soon. I’m gonna go up to my room now see you all tomorrow” .
Being president of the sorority meant that you got the privilege of having a bedroom to yourself . You wouldn’t mind sharing but it meant having a guy over would be a million times more difficult . Luckily since you don’t have to share means that any male suitors can get down and dirty with you in private.
You slumped down onto your bed and awaited as Mr Kento Nanami to get off of his high horse and add you back !!!
Your phone buzzed once more..
Kento added you as a friend!
You rushed to your phone and began typing telling him to show you his plans . This was really an excuse to see if he would send any snaps of him .. in his room … with his stupid glasses on.. shirtless?
Kento sent you a snap
And it was just a photo of his hand pointing to his own personal whiteboard in his room .. point…his hand . Indirect hand pic , tut tut tut kento nanami the man you are. The sleeves of his white button down shirt rolled up to his elbows , veins decorating his arm in a subtle manner. His forearms filled out his shirt nicely , you began to wonder how well his biceps did too. Your eyes were fixated on the screen , day dreaming . Does he think it’s weird that you left him on open for so long? Why do you care?
You snapped him back a photo of you laying on your bed , sticking out the tip of your tongue at the camera . Like snaps that you send to your sorority sisters . he left you on opened for a minute , is he analyzing your snap too?
Opened for ten minutes .
Okay , maybe you were a bitch and said snarky things when he was in earshot BUT TEN MINUTES ARE YOU SHITTING ME? You sighed and began snapping the other boys on your phone hoping they’d entertain you for the night.
By the time Friday rolled around , you and Kento had talked like twice and messaged like once . You weren’t that big of a bitch were you? WHY WAS HE TOTALLY IGNORING YOU? You kept yourself busy with your presidency plans and planning darties and regular parties . After class when walking out you saw the same blonde man standing there , was he waiting for you?
“BLONDIE HEY” you said in a singsong tone but still very loudly it looked like it had startled him , he pushed his glasses up with his thumb and middle finger, he half smiled at you yet again . He proceeded to walk over to you , “do you wanna ride?” . “On college campus? Blondie you’re dirrrttttyyy” you grinned and began to laugh at your own joke , he looked away and shook his head , “no no I meant to my apartment..so we can work..on the project, our project..together?” . You had totally forgotten, “ohh yeah no totally, why don’t you live on campus in the dorms?” You said while you began to walk , “do you want me to walk five feet behind you or something?” He asked in a serious tone , you couldn’t help but laugh at him . “Are you serious , no blondie.. no one is even around , now hurry up and answer my question” . He took a few strides forward to begin walking next to you , “I don’t like dorms..people invading my space, I have a roommate but he has his own bedroom so I’m not too bothered. It’s just how I like things. You know?”
You rolled your eyes , you could’ve answered the question for him that’s how predictable it was , “yeah and you also just hate people that’s why you never text me” . He pushed his glasses up once more , “no..I just thought you didn’t want someone like me to text you because of like..reputation” . You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at him yet again , “don’t be stupid blondie you seem pretty cool even if you are a loser virgin nerd”
“Loser virgin? I’m not-“ you put your hand to his face shushing him , “whatever whatever which one is your car blondie” he pulled out his keys and unlocked the white car in eye view , when walking in front of it he stopped before opening the door for you . Well mannered , smart , tall , polite . You could cream in your thong from just these interactions.
On the ride there you noticed kento kept his hand on his thigh whilst driving with one hand , you hand the urge to move it onto yours but that might weird him out . You wouldn’t want to scare him off .
The project you both managed to get through a significant amount , nowhere near done by any means but still a lot of work was done . By kento..mostly . You just sat on your phone for the majority and chimed in on any creative ideas he asked you for your opinion on . “Are you gonna help or just sit there or are you gonna actually help with any of the work?” Kento finally asked , anger bubbled in his tone but his stoic expression never wavered. You grinned , “no I like seeing you work , plus I wouldn’t be much help. I’d be more of a nuisance than help.. I’m not really good at stuff like this , talking presenting sure but actually doing the work is so bleh”
He hummed and his eyes darted around your face , “how about I teach you..an easy way to do things, it’ll be easy trust me” he motioned for you to sit closer , you were now shoulder to shoulder instead of sitting from across the table . This tension , it might not exist to him but to you .
YOU WANTED THAT DICK.
After a while things actually started to stick into your brain , things actually made sense when kento explained how to do everything to you , showing examples from his work to compare with yours . In comparison his notes were so detailed yet concise it made everything seem so easy . So simple. “See you can do it. I don’t see why you had such a negative outlook on it even though you hadn’t even tried yet” . Your face began to warm , he believed in you . He looked up from your work to your face , “blushing?” and this time you were rewarded with a full smile.
“N-no..I..I don’t-“ you stammered , while your face began to grow more red with embarrassment that he managed to get such a reaction out of you . Embarrassed by your childish reaction , to blush and stutter . The president of a sorority wouldn’t react like this by some loser nerd.
“Hm? Can’t get your words out?” The smile plastered on his face he was basically mocking you but why was it soooo sexy? You hid your face in your hands to hide from the embarrassment, “don’t hide I like seeing you like this..I don’t think many others get to see you in a state like this. It makes me feel good , plus you look cute like this” Kento’s babbles didn’t help much , you were still very embarrassed .
you kept your face hidden until you felt a pair of firm hands on your wrists pulling them from your reddened face . “I like this y/n…not the front that your sorority sees.. I like when you get shy . It makes you more human.” Your faces were inches apart , your breath hitched . “I don’t like you seeing me like this..makes me nervous you won’t see me the same” you admitted . He stared at you once more , he was contemplating.
“Would you slap me if I tried to kiss you?”
“…no”
His large hands moved to your face his lips crashing against yours . For some reason this felt right , a passionate kiss , something so rough by someone so quiet. This felt right . His nervous hands moved from your face to your waist , pulling you into his lap . His lips broke away from yours , he began to kiss down your jawline . “Sorry, just wanted you closer to me..needed you closer. Is this okay?” .
“I like it , stop worrying blondie I like when you take initiative like this” you said as your hands ran through his blonde hair . “ say my name” he said practically begging as he began to kiss your neck . “Kento..I want more..” you said not being able to look at him , the embarrassment of him getting you so flustered. No boy had ever gotten you so stupidly feral like this.
You just wanted him to rip your clothes off already. It’s almost like he could read your mind , your shirt was taken off so quickly but Kento latched his mouth back to your collarbone and he continued to kiss you. He wanted to get a good look at your assets but you finally looked down at him to notice that his glasses were all fogged up, his lips were swollen from kissing you and his cheeks were a cute pink color. He removed his glasses setting them on the table , “sorry, you’re just really pretty. I always thought it…can I take this off?” He asked nervously but you were too caught up staring at how attractive he actually was. Well you thought that yes , but his bone structure with his glasses off his face is so chiseled . But you thought the glasses made him look so much cuter.
He nervously took your bra off watching as your tits spilled out of it. His dusty pink cheeks intensified, “sorry for being so forward , I’m just really excited” but you shook your head at his apology , “I told you I like you taking initiative..I get nervous in situations like this, even if I try to hide it but, you make it impossible to hide it from” . He gave you that same smile , it made butterflies start to circulate your stomach like they were on a wash cycle . He hiked your skirt up and moved your thong aside before he began to separate your folds that were collecting an embarrassing amount of wetness , just from kento’s words and kisses . Is this really all that it took to get you this worked up?
His thick fingers began to slip inside you, even though you were so wet it didn’t distract from just how thick his fingers were . As they began to curl up inside you , you arched your back against the table . You slapped your hand over your mouth to muffle your whimpers but kento just removed his fingers from you which made you start to clench around the sudden emptiness that left you shaking your head , “no no Kento I don’t want you to stop” you whined which made him smile , “then don’t cover your mouth I wanna hear how much you like it” . You nodded , “I will I promise I will” , “you’re so good aren’t you?” Which you nodded in response as his fingers returned inside you , the sounds of your moans and the sounds of kento finger fucking you. But the feeling of him hardening under you made you all the more desperate and you could tell he felt the same way.
“Are you gonna let me fuck you properly now princess?” He asked as he lifted you up onto the table that was still littered with your project and other pieces of paper he used to study with . “Ken- wait the project” you said gripping onto his broad shoulders , he shook his head , “I don’t care I can make up for it if it gets destroyed , I just care about you right now” he said like he was hungry , he rushed to unbuckle his belt . You laughed at how much he wanted it , how strange it was to you that someone wanted to have sex with you this much. Although you really hadn’t known each other that long , he wasn’t an immature boy . He was a man.
He lined himself up with your sopping wet hole that was practically begging to be fucked at this point , as he began to thrust inside you , you couldn’t help but squirm and wiggle around . Whatever thickness you thought you had experienced from his fingers only intensified with his dick . WHO KNEW NERDS WOULD BE SO HUNG
You were chanting his name like a mantra , your eyes fixed in the back of your head . Your tongue began to lol out of your mouth , kento grabbed your ankles and brought them to his shoulders so he could fuck you deeper . In all honesty you still weren’t adjusted to his sheer girth , you were sure he was leaving an imprint of the veins on his cock like a tattoo inside your cunt.
He grinned as he began to feel you pulsate around him , watching you struggle to take all of him made him want to watch your alter ego unravel more , the more he fucked himself into you. “I wonder how all those dumb jock frat boys would react knowing that you secretly love to be fucked by a..what was it that you called me?” .. he watched in awe as you struggled to even formulate simple structured sentences , “mmn- I..I called…mmn loser…mn..kento” you tried to speak but struggled to even think of what to say , he smiled , “so close princess , you called me a loser virgin”
You were wrong , no loser nor virgin could fuck you like this . How could this quiet boy secretly be able to fuck you so good , so good you might cum. Cum? What a man is actually gonna make you cum? But kento was smart he knew you were close so he put his thumb onto your clit making small circles it made your legs interlock tighter around kento , toes curling and everything . He made it seem so effortless , he knew exactly how to please you.
If soul mates were a thing, maybe he’d be yours.
NO
DONT THINK THAT
THE DICK CANT MAKE YOU THIS DELUSIONAL.
“It’s okay baby..just let it go cum on this dick I’ll take good care of you . None of those athletes or frat boys can make you feel this good can they?” He said softly but it was a complete juxtaposition of how much he was slutting you out . You couldn’t take it anymore , the knot in your stomach finally snapped and your the muscles in your legs began to tighten and vibrate . Leaving your legs shaking and tears streaming down your face , completely ruining the makeup you so desperately wanted to keep on. But kento stripped it all away everything you do desperately wanted to keep hidden from him he just managed to reveal everything about you.
Nerds weren’t so bad after all.
You were kinda glad you got caught up with one.
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Maps — Jobe Bellingham.
Pairing: Jobe Bellingham x Fem!Reader
Summary: Noticing the not-so-subtle stares of the man you wanted but couldn’t have was something you despised.
Word Count: 775+
Disclaimer/s — Slight angst-ish… argument, that’s it.
A/N: The idea I originally had for this like, left my mind in the middle of writing so the ending is so ohr… rushed… hey. Hey!
Why couldn’t he make up his mind? Did he want you? Did he not? It was like holding a flower and delicately picking off the petals, playing the game of ‘he loves me,’ ‘he loves me not.’ It was tiring.
You didn’t know, nor could you tell. It was enough to make you lose it. Spending seconds, minutes, and hours on the situation only to push it aside. Telling yourself not to keep this going. But how could you do that when he always made you feel like you could actually mean something to him?
It pissed you off more than you cared to admit.
What pissed you off even more was the fact that Jobe was staring at you from across the room, his fingers running over his bottom lip and his eyes narrowed while the guy you were speaking to let out a laugh at something you had said. Seriously?
You told yourself that you were fine, you could do this. Don’t let him get to you. He wasn’t worth it.
Maybe you would have listened to your own advice if the man in front of you hadn’t stiffened and asked, “You know who that is over there?”
Already knowing who he was referring to, you refrain from sighing and instead excuse yourself. Wasting no time, you stride toward the man who slowly smirks up at you. Oh, you hated him.
“What the hell are you trying to accomplish?” You snap, your gaze never leaving his even when he stands up and shoves his hands into his pockets.
“I’m not trying to ‘accomplish’ anything.” Oh boy, he was insufferable! You couldn’t stand him at all.
Yet you still couldn’t find it in yourself to pull away when he gently grasps your forearms and guides you to a secluded area outside, thinking it was because your voice was raising and he didn’t want anyone to focus their attention on the both of you.
The second you’re aware that it’s just the two of you, you inhale sharply. “If you think you can just ghost me for days on end and then stare at anybody who’s even an inch in my vicinity the way you’re staring, then you’re wrong,” you snap, hands clenching. “Is it really that hard to make up your mind? I don’t—I don’t get you at all, Jobe!”
When he opens his mouth to speak, you quickly continue, “I will not wait for someone who doesn’t know what or who they want. I just won’t.”
After a few seconds pass, Jobe just simply stares at you, his jaw clenched and eyes narrowed, as if he’s contemplating how to handle the situation.
“Of course,” you scoff. “Whatever—I’m done.” Turning around, you’re about to walk away when he lets out a sigh and tugs you back toward him, making you roll your eyes and take a step back.
The man wets his lips, “I do know what I want.”
“Do you? Then tell me, what is it that you want?”
“You,” he responds almost instantly, making you suck in a breath. But you won’t give in that easily.
“Your way of showing it could use a little work.”
Taking a step toward you, he speaks once again, “Listen—I was… stupid before. I’m sure now.”
“You say you can’t be with me. Then you say that you won’t be able to be with me. Now I’m who you want? I don’t need you playing in my face.”
How did he go about this? You wouldn’t believe him. Rightfully so. Now that he was finally here and able to admit how he felt, he couldn’t help but feel that he was too late. Was he too late?
“What can I do?” He questions, his tone of voice quiet and soft. “Tell me what I can do; I’ll do it.”
Your eyes narrow. He was telling the truth, indeed he was. It didn’t even matter to you. Not anymore.
That’s what you kept telling yourself, but his next words changed your mind in an instant: “Will you have dinner with me? Let me just prove it to you.”
Let me prove it to you. All the resolve you had mustered up disintegrated into thin air and you found yourself letting out a sigh, “One dinner.”
“One dinner?” He echoes. “That’s—okay. Deal.”
Right, deal. You give Jobe one last look before walking past him. Once he’s alone, he starts coming up with different plans for your dinner. This is his one chance to prove to you that he’s, well, sorry and that you’re the one he wants.
And the man will make sure to prove both to you.
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DT(s) — @planetpedri + @spidybaby + @iovepoem + @sakashq + @joaoflms ! ౨ৎ
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