#I just would like to know why did doof set that up in the first place if it wasn’t for perry

[loublu8]

can you just ramble? ramble for as long as you want. as a fellow late 00s brit who's into some of the same interests as you (specifically vida the vet, charlie and lola, me too, balamory, abadas, and literally just any other cbeebies show i grew up with) i'd love to hear it!

if it's a ramble you want, a ramble you shall get. In other words here's like, my complete history with CBeebies. As a 08' kid, I was born in a weird transitional period for the channel. This was one year after they introduced the now iconic blocks of Get Set Go, Discover and Do and Big Fun Time, and Chris and Pui were going to move on from pres in 09' to work on Show Me Show Me. Postman Pat was just fresh from it's big SDS overhaul, which people either loved or hated (I think I liked it as a kid but looking back on it, it's nothing to get worked up over IMO, I just don't get why Pat can do James Bond-esque stunts now and is perfectly content riding a motorcycle.). Oh, and there was this little show about a garden of the night that began the year prior, I doubt that you've heard of it. Yeah, In the Night Garden was probably the first major CBeebies show I remember getting obsessed with, and looking back at it? I honestly don't know why. It's not a bad show at all, don't get me wrong, but I don't know why I was so obsessed over it to the point of having this dancing Igglepiggle toy as a kid.

Also, I remember loving the Hahoos as a young'un, part because a CBeebies magazine I got ages ago had little Hahoo toys. I took them on holiday to Turkey with me, yeah can you tell I'm autistic? I don't think I have them anymore, and if I do they're probably all scuffed up and missing paint. But that's okay, I can easily buy them on eBay to fill a place in 2 year old me's hear- HOW MUCH FOR 5 SMALL PIECES OF PLASTIC?

Yeah I didn't know these things were going for this much until my mum saw someone on Facebook ranting on how stupid expensive they are nowadays about a year ago. Anyways, on the topic of CBeebies' Bedtime Hour (and A Quarter nowadays), there's one elephant in the room I must discuss, the closedown screen.

This slightly green thing telling you to get some sleep absolutely terrified me as a kid though, it wasn't on the same level as the Eastenders theme's doofs and Christmas crackers if I remember correctly, but it still gave me PTSD for years on end. (Hey, at least I wasn't around for when the channel started, I really wanna meet whoever thought it was a great idea to make this screen bright blinding pink right after the goodnight song settled everyone down, just so I can tell them how dumb that idea was.)

Like all things I was spooked of as a kid, I got over it when I was getting nostalgic for the brand. Speaking of closedown screens, how is the closedown screen for the 2023 rebrand really good? Like, it would make a great screensaver without the text. You can say what you want about the new logo (which I think is fine, it fits in with the rest of the modern BBC branding so it succeeds in that aspect), but you gotta admit they did a really good job with revamping the idents for the channel.

Anyways, onto more of my favourite CBeebies shows. Charlie and Lola is easily up there as one of my favourites. It'sMy mum distinctly recalls taking me to the live stage show (which, live stage shows are a whole other can of worms I can talk about), and I couldn't remember much about it so I researched it, and it looks like they did a ridiculously good job of translating the show to a stage play while keeping the show's unique artstyle.

Balamory, obviously as a CBeebies viewer prior to 2016, I know what a Balamory is. I don't need to explain it. Though one weird memory I have is I remember going past the local barbers one day and seeing a Balamory rerun airing. I dunno why they showed CBeebies in the barbers of all places. On the other hand, Me Too!, which to me always felt like Balamory, but a wee bit worse (because that's exactly what it was!), and I don't remember my exact feelings towards it as a kid, but as a teenager, I became obsessed with it after found the Me Too! YouTube channel after I was pretty much done binge-watching Abadas. It quickly became my main comfort show, like if I'm not in the mood for anything else, just stick an episode of Me Too! on, there's like 150 episodes and I'm not sure if I've even seen over half of them. I've seen more MT! eps than Balamory though, probably cause it's more easily accessible. With Balamory, you gotta go on the internet archive for episodes of that. Abadas was one of the shows I distinctly remembered the intro for, though I misremembered it with Baby Jake of all shows (they came out around the same time). I went and revisited it one January day in 2023, around the time I was starting to put my Bubble Guppies hyperfix on the backseat as the show was about to end, and instantly fell in love with it. Really wish the production company behind the show didn't go bust as there was a lot of cool supplementary material with the show as well, they did a bunch of shorts on Vimeo which I happily recommend.

Eventually, I fell out of CBeebies around 2014 or so as, well, I was getting older and was ready to move on to more grown up shows (this is coming from the same kid who kept actively watching Nick Jr. well into his teenage years). But then I was channel surfing at my nan's around October 2019 or so and decided to stick CBeebies on for fun after deciding whatever was being shown on Challenge was too boring, I guess. Something Special was probably the show that launched me back into my CBeebies hyperfix, yea of all shows. Completely forgot the show used Makaton and as someone who was interested in sign language I went on a binge-spree to study all of Justin's signs. I became fairly competent at it. I got into Hey Duggee for a a bit as well, known as every parent's lifeline apparently. The game show episode is one of my favourites, mostly due to all the fun references they crammed into the episode. As a fan of the shows we people call game, it was a fun surprise. I also rediscovered some of my old childhood favourites that were still getting reruns. Swashbuckle was a bit too recent for me to have recalled watching it as a kid but my brother was certainly around for it and Tree Fu Tom, which was still rerunning at the time. Charlie and Lola still aired reruns, and back in 2019 I kinda just glanced at without much thought before realising a few years later that it was actually really good. Night Garden made me cry of nostalgia, and I also thought Baby Jake was the biggest feverdream ever conceived on television. I even was one of the weirdo's who listened to CBeebies Radio, though honestly there's no point in listening to it live as you can find all it's content on the Sounds app. Admittedly, I haven't gotten super into Bluey. Y'know, the most popular preschool show of this decade that didn't begin in this decade? Yeah I watched about 10-15 episodes of it, said "wow, this is one of the best preschool shows ever crafted", and then moved on to watching the same 40 Blue's Clues & You! episodes again. I'm sure if I force myself to binge watch it more I'll fall head over heels in love with it though. So if I haven't gone crazy for Bluey, what modern CBeebies shows have I gone crazy for? Funnily enough, two that released within the span of around 5 months. The Game Catchers was the first one I got into. I just kept binging episodes and instantly fell in love with it. Always thought the show's main concept was really, REALLY good. Teaching kids about outdoor games in the day and age of iPads is a really smart move. Don't really see many people in the fanbase yet unfortunately, it's certainly one my favourite CBeebies shows from the last 5 years. Also it has absolutely ruined me as any time I hear or say the phrase "so cute" I immediately have to connect it to Nina.

Vida on the other hand I pretty naturally got into. I checked it out, watched the first few episodes, and thought it was pretty good, but never intended it to become my next big hyperfixation. I was sooooooo wrong. I've always had a soft spot for shows with cute animals (Was a big LPS 2012 fan way back when) so naturally this was always destined to be a show I'd fall in love with. I also love all the characters in the show too. Pippen's my personal favourite, but Zigzag is a REALLY close second though. She's a cute bunny who canonically has ADHD. What's not to love.

Okay I think I've talked enough and I've been typing this out for like, 2 hours, I really need some sleep. I could talk about all sorts of other CBeebies shows I enjoy (LazyTown, Tish Tash, JoJo & Gran Gran, Carrie & David's Popshop's a more recent one I've binged from the days of old) but I've talked enough so yeah.

[mozart-the-meerkitten]

Okay everything about a Wingfeather Saga/Phineas and Ferb crossover would be hilarious. And by Wingfeather Saga I mean Wingfeather Falls because it’s even funnier.

Idk even where to start. The Wingfeather kiddos walk through a portal into Phineas and Ferb’s backyard and end up helping with whatever they’re building. Kalmar is in his element with the chaos. Janner is trying desperately to keep track of Perry so he can sketch whatever this new creature is. Leeli’s just chilling, probably hanging out with the Fireside girls and staring at Candace in concern.

Across town Artham and Fiddleford end up at Doofenshmirtz’s evil inc. where Artham discovers that Fidds and Doof know each other because Fiddleford accidentally hacked into an evil villain meeting skype call once and they just... let him keep doing it because I mean he does build giant robots that terrorize a town, has a tragic backstory and an evil laugh so I mean he’s basically one of them, he’s causing chaos it counts. Artham’s just pleased to know that Fiddleford talked to people back in the day.

Perry shows up and Artham and Fidds just fly up into the rafters to watch whatever’s going on. Artham mentions that Janner would love to see a platypus and then when the fight starts he’s like “ah. so this is how Ollister Pembrick did it”

99.9% sure Kalmar has convinced Phineas and Ferb to help him build Shacktron 2.0 which he has always wanted to do ever since Dipper showed him the picture but he never had a house he could do it with. Phineas and Ferb are more than happy to turn their house into a giant robot to help this kid fulfill his dreams. Janner’s questioning Candace over why she keeps trying to bust her brothers and when it basically just comes down to it being a compulsion for her he’s like “wow okay I mean if it was safety I’d get it but, jeeze, Kalmar thinks I’m against fun but you my friend are on another level.” Leeli is composing the episode’s musical number and then promptly directing/performing in it.

Artham flies down in the middle of Perry and Doof’s daily smackdown to give hand-to-hand combat tips. They stop and listen to him and Perry starts taking notes. Artham tells Perry to attack him to demonstrate something and Perry doesn’t land a hit once. No one’s sure why Artham’s good at defending himself from animals except Fiddleford who’s cackling up in the rafters with the knowledge that Artham lived in his world’s most deadly forests for 7ish years.

Cue giant robot walking through town with a gang of kids in it including one overexcited young king. Artham and Fiddleford get to see it right before Doof’s invention inevitably destroys/cancels it out somehow. Kal is very disappointed that he didn’t get to show his uncles this wacky invention but is thrilled when they find out they saw it anyway.

rest is under the cut because this got long

PART TWO is somehow so much more unhinged. It’s literally just Artham deciding to bring his niece and nephews along with him and Fiddleford to visit Doofenshmirtz and absolute chaos descending. Kalmar won’t stop running around pushing buttons and inadvertently setting off lasers and traps which never hit him or any of the kids. Janner is wondering how concerned he should be about safety. Doof is running around trying to stop Kalmar and probably the only one getting hit by lasers and traps. Vanessa is there and so Leeli goes over to chat with her and sees her listening to music and explains her whistleharp, “I once held back an army with this!” “an army?” “yeah! during the siege of Ban Rona. also I can summon dogs with it.” “.... what.” “I can summon dogs!” “what kind of dogs?” “all dogs! do you wanna see?” “...yes”

Leeli and Vanessa go out on the balcony and Leeli starts alternating between playing her whistleharp and dogspeak and soon every dog in the tri-state area is there. This sets off Phineas and Ferb’s adventure of the day when Isabella comes and tells them her dog is missing. At first they try and build a dog summoning device but Leeli keeps also summoning the dogs so I’m just imagining a Bohemian Rhapsody song sequence going “galileo GALILEO galileo GALILEO FIGARO MAGNIFICOOOOOOOOOO” “oh let me gooooooo NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!” that part where the dogs are turning back and forth in a street obviously torn between directions. Phineas and Ferb give up because it’s obviously not working and go to plan B which is follow the sounds the dogs are hearing and see where it leads.

Meanwhile Perry has shown up because there are lasers going off everywhere and all the dogs have been pied-pipered there. He just lands on the balcony next to the girls and stares wide eyed at the chaos. Leeli looks at him like, “ooooh look, I summoned a platypus too!” “oh that’s just Perry, he’s my dad’s nemesis.” “hi Perry! you should go find my brother Janner he’ll love that.”

I think Artham and Fiddleford are just sitting off to the side observing the chaos. Artham is cheerfully petting dogs. Fiddleford is fixing all the inators as they break just for funsies. At least sixteen things are on fire. Janner has discovered Perry’s here and is happily sketching him again, with a hat this time and the clarification “platypus (secret agent)”. Doofenshmirtz is still in the background trying and failing to catch Kalmar who is having the time of his life.

There is a knock on the door and it is the boys and Isabella. Leeli answered and when they ask about Isabella’s dog she happily summons it with dogspeak. This is also when they go “oh there you are Perry” and he’s just chilling in a sea of dogs for no reason.

PART THREE is just Perry’s secret agency freaking out about how Leeli can straight up summon dogs and talking about how great that would be for them if they could get her to work for them so Perry has to find her. Luckily Leeli and her brothers are visiting again so he gets her and brings her down to his secret hideout. What follows is Major Monogram trying to convince this 10-11 year old to join a secret agency to train dogs and Leeli just like “you had me at ‘train dogs’” but then being the granddaughter of a pirate kicks in and she’s like “what’s in it for me?” and while Monogram and Carl try (and fail) to figure out what preteen girls like, Leeli mentally puts together a list of demands.

“Okay, first, I want a hat like Perry’s.” “Done.” “Second I want to go with Perry on one of his missions so I can ask Dr. Doofenshmirtz for one of his inventions and take it home for Kalmar.” “... W H Y.” “because he didn’t get to ask last time! he was too excited and hyped up on sugar!” “.... alright, fine.” *Leeli squees*

What follows is just a montage of Leeli training dogs while wearing a little secret agent hat. Then Perry has to chaperone her on one of his missions (he tries to open the door for her but Leeli’s like “I got it” and bangs it down with her crutch “they don’t call me lizardkicker and batwhacker for nothing!” Perry has no idea what that means but he’s a little afraid of her now).

Leeli walks in somehow avoiding any traps but Perry doesn’t even though he directly follows her, and she just trots up to Doof like, “Hi Dr. Doofenshmirtz Perry brought me here so I could ask if I could get one of your inventions for Kalmar.” and Doof’s just staring at her like “why are you using a little girl to confuse me Perry the platypus” Leeli looks back and forth between them a couple times and then is like, “oh right you have to do your fighting thing, okay, go ahead I’ll wait.” and sits politely off to the side waiting for them to have their daily confrontation. And they’re both just like “.....”

They stare at her for long enough that she’s just like, “well okay Perry if you won’t stop him I guess I will” and just. whacks Doofenshmirtz with her crutch. he starts yelling at her like “oh that’s no fair, what am I supposed to do, beat up a little girl?!”

And Leeli, who has recently read The Hobbit, continues whacking him while yelling, “I’m not a little girl! I am the lizardkicker of Glipwood, batwhacker of Ban Rona! I am the Song Maiden of the Shining Isle of Anniera and granddaughter of Podo Helmer! And now I’m a secret agent!”

She then manages to whack his inator in just the right spot so that it collapses into a pile of rubble and then looks up at him all wide-eyed innocence like, “okay can I have something for Kalmar now? :)” and he’s like “.... okay sure, why not.”

Perry’s just projecting this back to HQ with his watch and they’re like “:O”

It ends with Leeli loading up whatever contraption she’s acquired for her brother onto a wagon pulled by dogs while she declines the agency’s offer of a full time job with a winning smile “sorry, I’m already the Song Maiden, defender of the Shining Isle, and a little kid. My schedule’s full.” and she heads cheerfully through a portal with her brothers, dogs and wagon in tow.

[queenofthursday6599-blog]

Kid Human Perry Stuff

You know I've seen various Human Perry the Platypus AUs. When he's an adult he's always Phineas and Ferb's Uncle, typically from Ferb's side of the family.

Which I've never exactly understood why. Is it because of teal and green being more similar than teal and orange? Or is it because they also tend to make him Australian, and Australia is part of the british commonwealth?

Not to mention making him a Fletcher doesn't really make any sense, because it seems like most of the time the AU also makes him adopted. Like I feel like I've primarily seen AUs in which he's Lawrence's adoptive younger brother.

Anyways this post isn't about that. This is more about Human Perry who is also a child AUs, which there are significantly fewer of, primarily because Human Perry was more or less created by Perrysmirtz shippers to make it less taboo.

So child Human Perry the Platypus, how does he fit into the Flynn-Fletcher household. He's obviously way too young to be Linda or Lawrence's sibling, because I'm having him be close to the same age as the boys and Candace. Right in the middle. If Candace is (recently turned) 15, and the boys are 9 (8-10) then Perry is 12.

He can't be a nephew. Tiana (Linda's sister) doesn't have kids and we see her get married in the series. While Adrien (Lawrence's brother) wouldn't have named him Perry.

He could be adopted. Linda and Lawrence could have adopted him after they got married, but that wouldn't make too much since as they haven't adopted each others' kids yet. Ferb is still just a Fletcher, while Candace and Phineas are both still just Flynns, while both Linda and Lawrence are Flynn-Fletchers.

He could even be a foster. Which would explain how OWCA would be able to just rehome him to a new family if they ever decided he had to be relocated, or his secret identity as an agent was revealed to his family.

I however vote on Perry being Ferb's older half brother on his mom's side.

Let me explain. So Lawrence and Linda obviously at one point had long lasting and serious relationships with different people. Linda with Candace and Phineas's bio-dad, and Lawrence with Ferb's bio-mom. Not to mention both Linda and Lawrence both whole heartedly take on and treat their step-children (remember no legal adoption) as their own children.

So I could totally see Lawrence still getting with Ferb's bio-mom, even if Ferb's bio-mom already had a kid from a previous relationship (human Perry). Like he married Linda and she already had two kids.

Anyways, Lawrence did indeed end up adopting Perry, so Perry is legally a Fletcher, but he's not biologically related to anyone but Ferb. He had to adopt Perry in order to retain custody after the death of his (first) wife shortly after Ferb was born.

So Perry and Ferb are bio-half-brothers but legally full brothers. And they're both Candace and Phineas's step-siblings. If Perry really needs to be Australian than his and Ferb's bio-mom can be Australian.

She died too early for Ferb to pick up the Australian accent, which is why he's so completely British. While Perry learned her Aussie accent long before his introduction to Lawrence (his step and later adoptive father), and later the American accent.

We already know that accent drift isn't a thing in P&F's world, with Ferb being the clearest example of this. He's apparently lived in America around americans for years, but his accent is just as british as any other british character in the show. With it being implied that he and Lawrence joined the Flynns in America when Ferb was a toddler.

So in P&F accent is something that's more or less set for the rest of your life by the time you get the talking thing down.

The OWCA situation is a bit different in this AU. You see, the thing is, Perry isn't an official secret agent. Or at least he didn't start off his nemesis-ship with Doofensmirtz that way.

His beef with Doof originally started because as we can see from canon. You see, Doof's inators very frequently just end up pointed at what Phineas and Ferb are doing in the backyard. Occasionally directly putting them in danger.

Much like how Isabella figures out that Doof's building was the origin of the static plague in Night of the Living Pharmacists. Perry similarly figured out where all these crazy sky beams that occasionally put his little brothers in danger were coming from, and went out to put a stop to that.

I imagine he eventually got co-opted into OWCA at one point, because that's kind of what OWCA does. Just accept/shanghai any effective agent that they can find. Let us not forget Planty the Potted Plant. And he's been with them for at least a couple years by the time we get to The Summer (the one that starts with a roller-coaster).

[cantdanceflynn]

This is so correct, would you be able to elaborate on that? You have good Candace opinions and it would be really cool to hear your thoughts on her in the crossover.

OHOHOHOHOOHOHO I JUST SAW THIS ASK AND YOU HAVE OPENED A DAM UGIERHUITGHREUGHRG

OK SO CANDACE IS SO FUCKIN MISUSED IN THE CROSSOVER, EVEN IF SHES MORE INCHARACTER THEN PEOPLE THINK SOMETIMES

HER FIRST APPEARANCE IS BASICALLY A POKEMON GO JOKE, WHICH DOES ACTUALLY ADD UP WITH HER CHARACTER(IE: THE INATOR METHOD), AND THATD BE FINE ON ITS OWN, BUT THE MIXTURE OF HER JUST STRAIGHT UP NOT KNOWING ABOUT THE PISTACHIONS(SOME OF WHOM REPLACED AT LEAST BUFORD AND BALJEET, WHO SHE OBVIOUSLY KNOWS, AND LIKELY ALSO REPLACED THE MAJORITY OF HER FRIENDS???????? LIKE EVEN IF WE GAVE STACY IMMUNITY BASED ON NOTLP AND VANESSA IMMUNITY BC OF DOOFS TOWER AND DOOF HIMSELF BEING SORTA PROTECTED(PLUS NORM), JENNY AND JEREMY AT LEAST WERE LIKELY TAKEN OUT????) AND BALJEET BEING SCARED OF HER(ON A TECHNICALITY THAT DOESN'T EXIST IN THIS CONTEXT??? IT WORKS FOR BALJEET AND HIS INTERACTIONS WITH CANDACE, SURE, BUT ITS WEIRD REGARDLESS.) MAKES IT ALL SO WEIRD AND JUST DOESN'T MAKE SENSE FOR HER.

CANDACE DOESN'T RLY DO MUCH UP UNTIL THE SATELLITE WORKSHOP, WHICH IS KINDA STUPID BC LIKE. SHES DEADLY. WE KNOW THIS. CANONICALLY SHES DEADLY. SHE DOESNT RLY FIGHT ANY OR DO ANYTHING BESIDES MOVE WITH THEM. ITS SO WEIRD WHEN HAS CANDACE EVER DONE NOTHING REGARDING STUFF LIKE THIS.

AND UPON REACHING THE WORKSHOP, THE FIRST THING SHE RLY DOES IS RECOMMEND THEY BASICALLY KICK MILO OUT. WHICH MIGHT BE PRACTICAL, YES, AND IT IS IN CHARACTER, BUT THE WAY ITS DEALT WITH IS SO STUPIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD UGH. HER DECIDING TO TAKE HIM OUT HERSELF MAKES THE SITUATION ACTIVELY SO MUCH WORSE, ESPECIALLY BC SHE HAS SIMILAR EXPERIENCE WITH SITUATIONS LIKE THIS THAT PHINEAS AND FERB DONT HAVE(LISTEN, I KNOW THAT QUOTE IS INACCURATE AS MUCH AS ANYONE, BUT EVERYONE TAKES IT SO LITERALLY AND ITS SO STUPID WHY DOES EVERYONE DO THAT IT CLEARLY IS ASKING WHAT THEIR PLAN IS WHEN THINGS GO WRONG AND IN SITUATIONS LIKE THIS THEY DONT HAVE A PLAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), AND WHILE SHE DOES TRY TO HIDE THEM, THIS IS A COMBINATION OF TWO FOCAL POINTS OF BAD LUCK!!! ITS SUCH A STUPID IDEA AND EVEN IF MELISSA AND ZACH KNEW CANDACE BEFORE THEYD STILL PROBABLY CONSIDER IT SUSPICIOUS!!!!!!!

AND THEN THE ACTUAL SCENE WHERE SHE REALIZES HE CAN BE HELPFUL DOESNT TAKE INTO ACCOUNT HER OWN BAD LUCK AT ALL!!!!!!!!! ITS NOT EVEN CONSIDERED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE JUST SEES A BUNCH OF USUALLY UNLUCKY STUFF THAT MANAGE TO TAKE OUT SOME PISTACHIONS AND DECIDES HE COULD BE USEFUL BC HE KNOWS HOW TO DEAL AND USE MURPHYS LAW!!!!!!!!!! SOMETHING SHE CANONICALLY KNOWS HOW TO DO WITH HER OWN BAD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THE DIALOGUE ITSELF IS ACTUALLY RLY GOOD CHARACTER WISE TOO WHICH MAKES IT HURT MORE

(ALSO IT NEEDS TO BE SAID. I DO NOT GET ANYONES COMPLAINTS ABOUT THE PHINEAS AND FERB EFFECT VS MURPHY'S LAW. THEY SET THIS UP IN PHINEAS AND FERB WITH JUST OUR LUCK, ALL OF IT MAKES COMPLETE SENSE WITH PREESTABLISHED CANON, AND MURPHY'S LAW IS ALREADY SPECIAL IN THAT IT EXISTS!!!!!! ITS REASON FOR EXISTING ISNT EXPLAINED, JUST WHAT IT IS IN TERMS OF CANON!!!!!!! IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)

AND THEN SHE BASICALLY DOESNT DO SHIT FOR THE REST OF THE CROSSOVER!!!!!!!!!!!! FOR NO REASON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AND THE STUFF SHE DID DO BASICALLY DIDN'T MATTER OVERALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ISABELLA WAS MORE USEFUL OVERALL!!!!!!!!!

AND THEN THEY BRING IT UP AGAIN AND AGAIN THROUGHOUT THE REST OF THE SEASON, ITS A WHOLE PLOT THING, THAT "OOOOH, DOOF HAS BAD LUCK AND TENDS TO MISPLAN, HIS SITUATION IS SO SIMILAR TO MILOS!!!!" EVEN WHEN THE CHARACTERS THEMSELVES ARGUE THIS

BUT CANDACE DOESN'T SHOW UP AGAIN AND THEY DON'T EVER EVEN MENTION HER OWN BAD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

DOOF HAS HIS OWN BAD LUCK, YES, I DONT DENY THAT, ITS ALSO PROVEN CANON, BUT CANDACES SITUATION IS INFINITELY CLOSER TO MILOS AND THEY DONT DO SHIT WITH IT AND IT PISSES ME OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ANYWAYS TYSM FOR CAUSING ME TO WAKE UP WITH 99+ NOTIFS ON BASICALLY SOLELY CANDACE FLYNN STUFF MAD FUCKIN RESPECT

[limitlessgojo]

Going to a Private Onsen with Gojo

NSFW Gojo Satoru x F!Reader, established relationship

Type: One shot. This is around almost 4k words.

Warnings: 18+ NSFW content, Voyeurism, exhibitionism, daddy kink, squirting, overstimulation, praising, dom!Gojo, breeding kink, slightly manipulative/ Yandere Gojo, degradation

Notes: finally got to finish this fic, my motivation just dropped halfway lmao. The inn house has rooms with private hot springs. Not shared like the communal ones in public bath houses. This is half fluff half smut.

The private hot springs per room are separated by bamboo trees and wooden walls. (With holes. So you know what's gonna go down👀💦💦💦)

You and Satoru finally get the chance to have a 2 day 1 night short break from work. He takes you to an inn, checking in a tatami room with a private hot spring (onsen) included. The place smelled fresh, and you could smell the flowers outside.

"We can see the hot springs from here love. What do you think? It's gorgeous isn't it?" Satoru wiggled his eyebrows at you. You both set your luggage down, making yourselves at home. The sun is still high up, it is only 2:00pm and the hot spring is steaming, the sunlight making the water shine and glitter.

"It's not bad at all; the room is quite big as well." You smiled. Despite knowing that you're only stroking his ego, you let it go for once. Just this once because it is a special break after all. He internally pats himself on the back, beaming at you. “Glad you like it. Let’s take a walk around the area and then come back for dinner.”

“Fine with me”. Both of you changed into traditional clothing first. Gojo into a Yukata and you into your kimono. He helped you tie your obi and do your hair up. "Look how pretty my kitten is." He practically purred out as he cinched your waist beneath his large hands. His hands felt like fire on your waist.

You flushed, softly calling out his name. "N-not now." You stared at his profile. All lean and muscular. Knowing his physique hidden under the blue fabric did nothing to help. 

"Not now." He agreed. But the glint in his eyes said otherwise. Still he held himself back.

So you both set out, exploring the town. The stalls were bustling with people. You both bought souvenirs for the students as well as omamori (charms) for various purposes. 

You visited the temple and just tried to relieve the pent up stress from the last few weeks. “The air is so cool and it smells really nice here.” The flowers were all in bloom, as it was spring as of now. Satoru, however, kept his eyes on you for most of the time instead of the scenery around him. 

“Yeah, it’s real pretty isn’t it? Wanna take some photos?”

“Good idea! I need a new lock screen pic of us Toru!” you smiled. Your smile unfortunately dimmed upon noticing other women staring at Satoru and batting their eyelashes at him (ignoring the fact that you were right beside him). 

You’ve always known that he was a gorgeous person, just thanking your lucky stars that he actually came around to reciprocate your feelings. “Hey”, Satoru cupped your face and turned it to face him. He was pouting. “Focus on me love. This trip is just for us.” 

You gave him a weak smile. “Yeah, sorry about that. AH! I wanna have a picture by that Sakura tree~”. You tried to be more enthusiastic and engaging, blocking out any jealous and negative thoughts. 

Seriously, it's not like you didn't trust him. Just that your insecurity gets to you sometimes. You quickly bat the thoughts away. Your thoughts came to a halt when you felt something soft on the corner of your lips. 

"Love you." Satoru murmured against your cheek. You turned to see his eyes under his drooping sunglasses just an inch away from yours. You couldn't help but sigh in admiration. Of course he knows how you feel. "I love you more Toruu~ Now let's go." You gave him a genuine and bright smile. Walking over to a shaded area near the lake, surrounded by tall grass.

He leaned down to press his cheek against the top of your head and placed one arm around you. His other hand was holding up his phone for a selfie. After you took some pretty and funny photos, he surprised you by bringing out a polaroid.

"Eh?! Since when did you bring that with you?" You asked him. Satoru gave a sneaky smirk, "Well. Since you talked non stop about loving the vintage aesthetic recently, I thought it would be good to make a small scrapbook or photo album of this trip." 

".... who are you and what have you done with my husband..."

"Hey! That's rude. I'm always nice and sweet." He pouted and widened his eyes, using a finger to push down his shades. "I knowww~ Just kidding Toru, I love your ideas. I'll help you with it then." 

"Of course you will pumpkin." He squeezed you against his side, not caring about anyone who might be looking at both of you being overly affectionate in public. 

He took pictures using the polaroid camera every now and then. Taking your hand and leading you around, Satoru did not give your thoughts a chance to move away from him. He didn't hesitate to tickle you when your guard was down and poked at your cheeks with the most annoying grin. 

After that it was just you and him. Enjoying your precious time together, undisturbed by anyone else. By the time the sun was setting, you dragged him over to an Izakaya. "Should we have dinner here?" You asked him. 

"Ooooh! Looks like they have good meat and eel. That's fine with me." He replied. You both enjoyed dinner and had a bit of sake. Satoru always looked cute with flushed red cheeks and that big stupid smile of his. "Well you look cuter than me for once Hun." He quipped back.

You smiled as you wiped that teriyaki sauce off the corner of his mouth for him. It was a really peaceful day. 

Walking back to the inn, you noticed a shadow moving quickly just by the corner of your eye. This is why you don't think about work during your free time. Feeling chills run up your spine, you turned to see a curse, staring straight back at you. "Ah shit I left my sword back in the inn." 

Not even having finished your sentence, you watched as Satoru flicked his wrist and took down the 2nd grade curse in an instant. "I told you not to worry darling. I'm not going to let anything hurt you." He tutted and booped your nose playfully, eyes shining. 

"Heehh~" you pretended not to be impressed but by the look on his face, you knew you didn't do a good job of hiding it. He just chuckled and wrapped his arms around you. "Toru I can't walk like this." 

It was like trying to lug a 190cm tall clingy infant. "I'll protect you with my infinity from all sides love." He looked really happy, just prancing around with you in his arms as you both made your way back to the inn. 

💜💜💜

You both settled back in and got ready to take a bath. It was a really good day and everything went smoother than you thought it would, knowing your chaotic and unorthodox doof of a husband. 

"Dinner was so good. This was a great idea Toru, thank you." You smiled up at him. He smiled back, so soft and gentle with you. The way he never is and never will be with anyone else.

"Now then, I'll be taking my payment from you." You looked up at him, confusion evident on your face. Your husband of 5 years still confuses you until this day. "I'm sorry?" you felt affronted as you asked the question. You had no problem paying your share of the bills, heck you earn a lot as a 1st grade Jujutsu sorcerer yourself. 

But Satoru spent about over a month pestering you about wanting to treat you to a short staycation with him. "Yes", he replied slowly making his way towards you, towering over your shorter frame. You stood your ground and craned to look up at him. 

"Thank you for the meal sweetheart. You will be my dessert." He removed his glasses and threw them aside to showcase his bright blue eyes. You shivered from the intensity, and his lips turned up in a smirk. His words were somewhat funny, but his tone was dead serious.

He wasted no time, leaning down to suck down on the juncture of your neck and shoulder, after he pulled one side of your kimono off your shoulder. "Sa-Satoru!!, hah- ", his grip on you was way too tight.

"Baby, I am so sorry I can't wait any longer. Won't you be good for me?" Satoru asked as he took a step back and cupped your cheeks in his hands.

It's true that this man has no self-control, always palming your ass down the hallways at Tokyo Jujutsu High. But you rarely see him as desperate as he is now, that it was actually endearing to you. So you relented, earning a grin from the man.

He helped you out of your kimono, littering small kisses on your forehead and cheeks, before he started biting on one ear. 

Unclasping your bra, he reached down to grope your breasts. You stared at him as he suckled on one nipple while toying with the other. His eyes opened to meet yours, and you could feel the growing wetness between your legs.

You also reached up to pull his Yukata off, undoing the tie on his waist. "I love it when you hair is done up darling. I can bite as much of your neck as I want." He growled out against your shoulder, biting and sucking wherever he can.

Your mouth watered upon seeing the outline of his hard-on straining against his boxers. On the other hand, Satoru stared unashamedly as you pulled down your panties, keeping your legs together to keep your slick from dripping down your legs.

Impatiently, you reached up and ran your fingers through his locks. "Satoru~" you whined. He only smirked in response. In one quick movement, he gathered you into his arms and brought you over to the small washing area with the soap and shower-head. 

He was still in his boxers however. You just stared at it, drawing closer to press your hand and rub the outline. He let out a long moan, which led to you to quickly look up and snap out a hush. "The neighbours might hear us Toru." You whined. 

"Tch, Let them hear. They can't touch or experience us anyways. And I want to show off my lovely little wife." He leered down at you, finally removing his wet boxers and throwing it onto the ground.

His hard cock sprang up and slapped against his abs. As if moving by some force, you immediately dropped to your knees. Rubbing soap onto his waist, thighs, and finally pumping his cock with your soapy hands. You looked up to him as you "cleaned" him off with innocent eyes. 

Satoru wasn't impressed. "Don't tease me baby or you'll regret it." He pulled you up and brought you into a deep kiss. You both gathered more soap and started washing each other off.

With his hands moving slowly down the sides, Satoru didn't hold himself back from touching every nook and cranny of your body. From your neck, to your shoulders, down your breasts, going to your thighs and legs. His hands were rubbing at your skin, inching nearer and nearer to your cunt. Until he suddenly pulled away, making you cry out at the loss of contact. 

"Be good for me and let me clean you first kitten." He whispered.

No other words were shared as you both rinsed and washed each other off before moving to the onsen.

"You know, I've always wanted to fuck you in a hot spring." Satoru smirked as you both dipped into the water. You sat on his lap and clasped your hands behind his neck, straddling him. His hands gripping either side of you waist tightly. 

"No I don't know." You turned away from him as you rested your head against his chest. He hummed. Both of you resting for a bit. You were both in the same state, antsy for action, but trying to enjoy the hot springs at the same time. 

For a while you both just stayed soaking in the hot water. Until you started grinding down against him. He just stared down at your figure. Breasts spilling against his chest, the slope of your s line with your ass under the water. But you refused to meet his eyes.

Satoru didn't really like that very much. He pinched your thigh hard. "Ow!,' you yelped. "Toru what was-" you finally turned to look up at him, but faltered and stopped moving. His eyes were bright and his expression dark. "I thought my baby was going to be good for me tonight. You don't wanna beg me later just to come right? Or does daddy have to make you do just that?"

As soon as he said the word daddy you felt your insides clench around nothing, thighs quivering. He looked down towards your body, grinning at your response. He pulled you out of the water, sitting down on the ground beside it. 

"Suck me off baby and I'll consider making you cum."

You crawled over on all fours towards him. You kissed him first, then trailed downwards, licking off the water and sweat on Satoru's abs and the outlines of his hard muscles. He groans while staring at you, pupils blown so wide his bright blue eyes actually look dark for once. 

You can see the carnal lust raging behind him as you squeeze your breasts together while kneeling and licking his abs. You leave small butterfly kisses as you slowly make your way down to his aching member.

But, he groans as you skip past it and suck love marks into his lower thighs. "Pumpkin, please -UNGH, p-please don't tease so much." Satoru groaned. You smirked up at him, meeting his eyes while sticking your tongue out and licking one of his balls. Sucking it into your mouth and covering it with your spit.

He reached down to lift your chin up, thumbing your lips as he watched the saliva trickle down down side of your mouth to his fingers. The current sight of you is so lewd and dirty that Satoru almost came on the spot right there. 

You decide to humor him and move to licking the head of his dick, while grabbing a hold of the base and slowly pumping it up and down. Satoru threw his head back. He looked up, seeing the night sky and the stars twinkling while feeling hot pleasure run through his body. He felt like he was floating.

You tried deepthroating all of him in one go, but he was just too big. "Baby, your mouth is too small for daddy's cock isn't it?". You whimpered in response. Trying to swallow as much of him as you can while using your hand for the remainder of his length.

Quiet mewls escaped the sides of your mouth as you opened your aching jaws wider. Tears started running down your face. You didn't stop as you relaxed your jaw and took more of him, swallowing what you can while pumping. He bucked up without warning, causing your gag reflex to react. Then he pulled you off.

"That's enough for now. I wanna make sure I stuff every bit of cum I have inside of your pussy baby." He pulled you up over him, this time with his back to the floor as he spoke. 

"Lemme eat you out, I've been waiting for this all day." He was salivating at the sight of your pussy, positioned in front of his face. You lowered yourself onto him slowly. Impatiently, he tugged you waist down, smashing your lower lips against his mouth. You let out a loud yelp followed by heavy breaths and mewls as he ate you out.

Thrusting his tongue in and out of your walls. He loved the taste of you, always thirsty for more. You tried to grind your pussy against his face. But he held your legs in place with one arm, wrapping around your behind. The other hand was playing with your clit. 

In no time at all you were sobbing and cumming all over his face. Satoru didn't spare you one second of rest. He pulled away and lined himself up, pushing into you during your orgasm. 

He immediately started fucking into you earnestly, grabbing a hold of your waist and lifting it to pull you on and off his cock. "Toru, it's too much for me, I can't-" You could barely get the words out of your mouth as you slurred them out with your eyes shut. 

"Yes you can. I know you can. Because you're made for me and only you can do a good job for me like this love." Satoru grunted as he pumped into you like there was no tomorrow. 

He loved it when your walls clenched and squeezed against him tightly. Especially when your whole body shook during an orgasm. Whenever you open your eyes all you can see are the stars blurring due to your movements. You both came like that, with your backs arching. His cock stayed hard, twitching as it spurted and filled you up. 

He suddenly felt the sensation of eyes on him. As the user of six eyes, his senses were wide alert at ALL times. He looked to the side of the wooden wall, and saw dark eyes staring back at him.

He didn't stop thrusting. You whined and mewled as you ground your hips against his. "Fuck, such a slut for me. Love it when you cry and make those noises babe. Just look at me. I won't look at any other person, man or woman. I'm yours as long as you're mine." He growled out.

He pulled out to reposition you. Dragging your body on top of his. Your back against his chest. "Daddy, I want you. I want more!" You whined out. You positioned his cock at your entrance.

"Daddy will give his baby what she wants. You've been so good to me after all love." He smirked inwardly pushed back upwards into you, thrusting at a fast pace. (Satoru chose the position because he knew you were both being watched. He loves to make other men so jealous of him having you).

You could only squeal and try to hold yourself up against him, putting your palms against the floor. But it was no use. He grabbed your thighs and kept fucking up harder and harder, making it hard for you to hold onto anything.

"Yes just like that baby. You're so good to me. You don't need to think. I'll make it so that you don't have to do anything else. You only need to feel my cock yeah? My doll is the best when she is crying on my cock." He moaned out. 

The man on the other side of the wall was joined by a few other men. Satoru used his ability to see through the wall following the movement of their cursed energy and saw that they were touching themselves to you.

"Daddy, please more. Daddyyy~" you were slipping further into subspace. Soon you couldn't speak clearly anymore. Just babbling nonsense while bouncing on Satoru's lap and staring hazily up at the sky.

"I think we have company." He laughed out. You snapped out of your haze to see peeking eyes behind the bamboo sticks. Satoru just thrusted harder. "Let's give them a show of their lifetime hmm? I spy old men wanting some action. But they won't be able to touch you baby."

He reached up with one hand to grope your breast and the other stayed below to play with your clit. Sex to him was almost like an art form. He knew exactly how to play with your body to bring you to your strongest orgasms. 

You tried to cover your body up but he pulled your arms away. "Don't run away baby, daddy's here to protect you. It will be okay."

At the end of the day you trusted him and his six eyes, so you let go. Pussy clenching harder at the thought of being watched by unknown strangers.

"That's it, my angel. So good for me. You're leaking far more than normal slut. You like it when people watch you get fucked?"

He reached up with his cum stained hand to spit into it. Then shoved his fingers in your mouth. You obediently suckled on and cleaned his fingers for him. He continued to grope you as he pounded away.

Satoru wasn't too worried about the spectators next door. He can see them clearly. Several middle aged men (probably sharing a larger room) messily jerking off to both of you. He saw the way their eyes travelled across your breasts and cunt, which was oozing with his cum.

He hit a hard deep spot inside of you which caused you to squirt hard, a large amount of liquid spraying out. Satoru quickly put his hands over your clit and furiously rubbed at it, wanting to prolong your squirting. You were crying out loud at this point. It was just music to his ears.

One man groaned out, causing you to tense and tighten and Satoru to moan out.

"You love putting a show on huh baby? We should do this more often if it gets you tighter and wetter around me." He snarked out while you drooled and asked for more.

He didn't stop thrusting until he came a few more times inside of you, changing positions.

The men watched as you rode him, your breasts bouncing up and down, while you placed your palms flat on Satoru's chest. They stared at the cum flowing out of your pussy, being fucked back into you by Satoru. The way you both groaned as you clamped down tight and milked his cock.

Soon you found yourself laying on your side with one leg up with Satoru spooning you from behind. What was frightening was his stamina and power. 

His thrusts never lost strength and soon you just felt like his cock was drilling a space inside of you, just for it. You felt so boneless in his hands when you both finished, laying down on your sides.

"Babe…. You okay? We need to clean up." Satoru whispered against your shoulder.

You could only mumble incoherent noises. Squeezing around his softening length, still plugged inside of you to keep his cum inside. 

Satoru gave out a soft sigh. Then gathered you into his arms and took you away from prying eyes. He just turned and smirked at them as he walked away with you, butt naked.

The watchers were disappointed that the show was over. Satoru then cleaned you both with the shower head in the washing area and wiped you down with soft towels.

You stayed silent the whole time. Your head felt like it was in the clouds. Just letting Satoru do his way with you like a doll. "You were really good for me tonight angel. Nobody else can touch you but me." He chuckled darkly.

You just listened to his simple commands such as putting your arms up when he dressed you in your nightgown. 'I always love fucking her dumb.' He smiled to himself as he settled you into his arms in bed. 

"Next time I'll be fucking you in the water." He whispered. He brought you closer to him, tucking your head against his neck. Kissing your forehead and patting you to put you to sleep. 

🎇🎇🎇

The next morning you were absolutely horrified to see people staring at you, when you both left your room to check out. 'I bet they heard us last night. And who were the ones peaking at us?!?!' you frightfully thought to yourself.

Satoru didn't really care. Smiling brightly at the attendants and thanking them for your amazing stay at the inn. 

"Toru I really enjoyed my stay, but it's hard to be happy now knowing that we did it at the expense of our neighbours stay." You whispered, hitting him. "Darling I'm pretty sure they enjoyed the show." He winked at you, shameless as ever.

Suffice to say, you decided not return to said hot springs for a while out of shame.

End notes: 🙈 this fic started because I just thought of Satoru's abs wet with steam and sweat but it evolved during the last edit. Hope you guys enjoyed! Reblogs and comments are very much appreciated 💜

All rights reserved to Limitlessgojo.

[clearwillow]

50. Either way that strikes you. ❤️

Hi @dawnrider ❤️ I actually opted to do both, cause not only was it a particularly sucky night and the fluff was needed, but because this will probably be the only prompt I get sent.

Decided to do "Its okay, I couldn’t sleep anyway." around Hired Help, because that AU really needs some fluff right now. It would be early on in the fic, for those that have read it. (I'll add it to AO3 once I can think of a title, so for now it's tumblr-exclusive)

--------

Kagome dropped down unceremoniously on her couch and sighed. Her feet hurt something awful. Those cute pumps she had bought to go with her new outfit for work? Hurt like she’d walked on glass shards all day. She came out of them as soon as she had her front door open and forced herself not to grab them by her toes and fling them across the apartment.

They were still expensive, even if she had gotten them on sale.

Her work involved walking. A lot of walking. She thought that the heel hadn’t been difficult to walk in, and she hadn’t felt any discomfort until she’d sat down in her car. Then it had hit her and all she’d wanted to do was get in bed and sleep. Only she’d have to get home first.

“Mistakes were definitely made,” she decided, glaring at the offending footwear that sat on her coffee table. Her phone buzzed and she had to give herself an awkward pat down to find the device to see who the text message was from. “Inuyasha?”

[Kags, you have anything going on tonight?]

Unsure of his intentions, Kagome chewed her lip in thought before typing out a reply. [Only if watching TV counts? What’s up?]

[Actually…nevermind…]

[No, no – what is it, Inuyasha?] She was about to call him and find out what wasn’t important enough to ask all of a sudden. He’d done that when they were kids, and it had driven her crazy then too. He’d start to ask her something and back out immediately after. Before she could hit the button to dial his number, his message came back.

[I wanted to know if I could come to your place? But you’re probably tired after work. I know I had you running all over the building.]

Even in a text she could feel the guilt coming from him. He didn’t know her shoes were going to hurt her like they did. Hell even she didn’t know! They’d only been coworkers for going on a month, at best. She had to learn the ropes. Find out where everything was located. Plan the most efficient means of reaching each office on the regular. It was more her fault than anything really. [Inuyasha I don’t mind!] Her thumbs flew across the screen keyboard as she responded. There was something about his text that had her gut telling her that there was more to it.

And when it hit her, she knew good and well there was an underlying question he would never ask outright.

[Inuyasha…really. It’s okay, I couldn’t sleep anyway. My mind is buzzing too much to wind down, and I’d love the company.]

[Are you sure?]

[I’m very sure.]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~(〜￣▽￣)〜~(￣▽￣)~*〜(￣▽￣〜) ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When the doorbell rang, Kagome tried not to let it show on her face that her feet still hurt like a bitch as she hobbled to let Inuyasha in. But when she opened the door to see him standing there, giving her a lopsided grin, she didn’t care if her feet were on fire. Her friend was here now. “You’re sure this is alright?”

“I told you yes, you big doof. Now get in here already!” Kagome shook her head as he walked inside, taking in the worn out jeans and t-shirt he’d thrown on. There had been a time when she remembered he wore those rock band shirts and barely filled the shoulders out. Now she could see the way his shoulder blades moved beneath the cotton as he shifted the weight of the bags in his hands.

It was…hypnotizing. And if she wasn’t careful she’d probably be drooling in a second.

Wait. Why did he have bags?

Inuyasha must have noticed her staring – hopefully at the bags, she realized too late in horror that this might not be the case – and answered unprompted. “Thought you might want to eat something that you didn’t have to stand on your feet to fix. Got some junk too. You still like Sonic hamburgers, right?”

The way he looked back up at her, how unsure he was, because he didn’t know if her tastes had changed since they’d hung out…it broke her heart. It reminded her of all the time they’d missed out on, and for him to show up at her doorstep after work just showed that he wanted to make up for that time. Kagome stepped forward and dropped her hands over his, deliberately sniffing out loud. “You got onion rings, right?”

He let out a breathy laugh. “Of course.”

Nothing would ever make Kagome turn Inuyasha away, even if he hadn’t remembered that she liked onion rings with her burger. He was making an effort to rekindle their friendship, to spend time outside of work together. And the fact that he was leaving his own place on a night with a new moon said so much. He didn’t want to spend it alone, and chose her out of everyone he could spend the evening with.

Sleep was overrated and she knew she’d have the day off the next day anyway.

They ended up spreading the food he brought all over the coffee table. Inuyasha couldn’t help but notice how she tossed the shoes she’d plucked off the table and into a lone chair. He hadn’t said anything about it, too focused on eating before their dinner got cold. The TV was more background noise than them actually watching, either critiquing how bad the reenactments of the hauntings were or reciting commercials word for word when they weren’t reminiscing about their childhood.

Kagome wasn’t expecting him to ask “Why did you get those shoes if they hurt your feet so much?” out of the blue.

“Because I didn’t know they’d hurt my feet?”

“Give me your feet.”

“What? Are you insane?”

“Let me see, Kagome.”

“No!” To reiterate that she wasn’t about to show her feet to Inuyasha, Kagome tucked her legs underneath herself in an attempt to hide them.

She really wasn’t expecting Inuyasha to reach across the couch and grab at her legs.

Kagome let out a squeal and wiggled in her spot, trying to shake him off. Inuyasha had one of two moods; he could be the most reserved person in the room, or he could take initiative in the most outlandish way. There was no in between with him, and when he set his mind to something there was no stopping him. And he’d decided right then and there that he was going to pry her legs out from under her. She felt her weight being lifted off the couch and squealed again, throwing her arms around his shoulders.

His very…very…strong shoulders.

It gave her pause, feeling the strength in him and allowing him the chance to set her back on the couch cushions with her feet draped across his lap. It was hard not to be disappointed. No one had ever carried her like that as an adult. She didn’t think she was light enough, but Inuyasha… he’d handled her with ease.

Kagome gulped. Not good. ‘Don’t think about your friend like that, Kagome.’

“You okay?”

“Huh? Oh…y-yeah,” she mumbled, ducking her head. “You just surprised me. That’s all.”

“You thought I wouldn’t do it?”

“No I knew you would. I just…you’ve changed, Inuyasha.”

Dark brown eyes looked at her in confusion. “Is that good, or bad?” he asked with uncertainty.

“Good for you,” she assured him. “But…bad for me. I missed out on seeing the changes as they happened. You’ve gotten so strong. Your hair’s longer. I mean I could go on but you don’t look like the boy I had to tell that I was moving away anymore.”

Inuyasha snorted. “Good thing, then. Cause I remember the pictures,” he teased, hoping to cheer her up. “I’ve always been strong, if you’ll remember. Now I just look it, so I dare anyone to call me a fucking hobbit.”

She had been seconds away from letting slip that yes – yes he did look strong now – but it would not have come out sounding like a friend. “I love your hair,” Kagome said instead. Whether the mass of curls that hung around his shoulders were silver, or black as they were now, she loved them. “Long hair suits you.”

He grinned, reaching for one of her feet. “And not having bludgeoned feet from your boss running you ragged all day suits you.”

Kagome started to protest because she could always soak them the next day, but the moment he pressed his thumb into her instep, all that came out was a low moan. Oh god, that felt better than any foot soak! His hands slowly and delicately kneaded her feet, not missing a spot and watching her face for any signs of discomfort. When he had both massaged to his satisfaction, Kagome shifted around on the couch to lean against his side.

“You know you’re not my boss, right? Your father is.” She pointed out.

“You’re my personal assistant. That means you answer to me.”

“That sounds like I should call you Master,” Kagome snorted. “Do I need to get a genie costume?” There was a choked sound and she looked up at him to see him looking elsewhere. Was he…was he blushing? “You thought of something dirty, didn’t you?”

“N-no!”

“Yes you did!” Kagome laughed as the blush got brighter. “Tell me, Inuyasha! I wanna know!”

“You really don’t!”

“We’ve got all night, Inuyasha…” Okay that should not have made him blush more, so it had to have been something really dirty. Kagome bumped his shoulder with hers and started a string of “Please, please, please” since he was holding out on her. “You never kept secrets from me when we were kids,” she reminded him.

Inuyasha opened and closed his mouth for a minute. “This is waydifferent!” he pointed out, adding “You wouldn’t have filled out one of those costumes as easily back then!”

The silence was deafening.

Now Kagome was blushing. Inuyasha was still blushing, only looking like he was about to crawl into the couch after realizing what he’d just said out loud.

Kagome couldn’t decide if she was meant to be upset or flattered. ‘Oh god, that means he’s looked!’ her brain screamed at her. She knew she was nothing but a flat mess up until her sophomore year, and she hadn’t really developed until late that summer before her junior year began. Inuyasha wouldn’t have known that, but he’d noticed. She could get offended, be upset that he was insinuating something that was very much true at one point, or be flattered and take it as a compliment. She couldn’t react any other way because while there were other options, this was Inuyasha. He’d never given her any indication of anything else.

Finally she said, “I don’t know if I’d want a pink costume.”

The body she was still leaning against relaxed at her words. “Jewel tones would be better, anyway.”

“And I don’t know if I’d call you Master either.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because you get this weird look on your face when I say it! You’re not my boss, remember! We don’t need that power play dynamic in the office!”

Inuyasha visibly looked put out. “I wouldn’t do that,” he mumbled, but she could still see the hint of red on his cheeks, so she knewthe dirty thoughts were still simmering. “What if I asked you to call me Sir, then?”

“Like a Knight in shining armor?” she laughed.

“I took care of your feet, didn’t I?”

Kagome nodded, “That you did. Thank you, Inuyasha.” She dropped her head onto his shoulder, taking his hand in hers.

“Ought to be thanking you,” he replied, leaning back into the couch. “You could’ve told me no earlier.”

“I told you it’s okay. I couldn’t sleep anyway tonight.”

Fluff Prompts

[artxyra]

You Are My Sunshine

Note: I never thought I would write something that is over 4000 words again, but here we are. This is loosely based on the @coralloverwinnerwolf suggestion request that they had asked me. 

“With the signing of these documents, Gabriel Agreste you no longer have the sole custody of your son Adrien Agreste. Adrian, you will officially be under the care of Mme. Cheng and M. Dupain.” The CPS member states pushing a formal document across the table. Gabriel Agreste was reluctant to sign but the piling evidence against him in light of Adrien’s rebellion stage leads him to believe there was no other choice. Tom and Sabine were ecstatic to take in Adrien. He’s a sweet boy that deserves the world and for the past month has made their home feel more like a home as Marinette now had a brother.

Originally, the CPS wanted Adrien to be sent to his Aunt in England but once taking into consideration that Adrien wasn’t as close, M. Agreste would do anything to keep his son in Paris, and the fact that Adrien himself made himself a home within the Dupain-Cheng household, it was easier to move custody rights to the Dupain-Cheng once proven how happier the teen had become. There was no need for a court appearance, just a small investigation that thankfully went under the media’s noses.

As of today, Adrien no longer carries the Agreste sir name as it was now Dupain-Cheng.

Adrien was ecstatic upon returning to the newest bakery location the Dupain-Cheng had moved into after deciding to expand their business once the two teens had graduated from college. Lycée was the perfect time to start over and forget their last two years of unhappiness. Though there were a few good things that came from their time in college. At Sabine’s suggestion, Adrien and Marinette had joined a foreign pen-pal program, and through that program, Adrien had met Jonathon “Jon” Kent, who was quickly taking Nino’s place as his best friend.

“Jon, I want you to be the first to know,” Adrien says as soon as his call was accepted. It wasn’t unusual that the Kent teen would be up at these times considering their time difference. Jon now wide-awake pushes for Adrien to continue. “I’m officially a Dupain-Cheng!” The former Agreste heir squeals with excitement. Jon squeals in excitement along with the former model but his were for on the hushed end.

“That amazing, Tigger. Was the process easy? Is Mars happy about you being her brother now?” Immediately Jon goes into a series of questions and concerns. Adrien couldn’t help but smile at the dark-haired teen on the other side of his screen.

“Mars is happy for me. We’re supposed to be taking family photos latter today to officiate it. You’ll probably be hearing Damian complaining about Mars once it's all said and done.” Adrien’s smile could brighten the world now that the looming fear of his father’s disappointment is no longer a concern of his.

“That’s good—” Jon looks off to the side. A flash of light passes by before a sigh of relief exits from the teen’s mouth. “Send me some of those photos once they’re ready.”

“I will.” Realization slowly began to dawn on the blonde, “Kwami. I forgot how late it is where you are? Want to finish this discussion later?” A small pout appears on Adrien's lips that Jon cannot help but internally squeal about.

After saying goodbye (or at the very least good night) to Jon, Adrien decided that maybe it was time to become the pestering brother Marinette always wanted.

“Hey buggy,” Adrien sings entering Marinette’s room that was smaller than the one at the other bakery.

Marinette didn’t mind turning her old bedroom into her studio after the move was completed. In fact, it worked out in her favor as it kept the work away from her when she needed downtime. The bakery across Françoise Dupont quickly became a hideout for the Miraculous Team and the location for Marinette’s MDC studio.

The moment Marinette heard her kittens voice, she immediately closes her laptop and turns her attention to the blonde male. “You need anything kitty?” Tilting her head gives Adrien a sense of security.

“Yeah, we haven’t decided what we’re going to do about Bug and Chat? I know you said something about meeting with Aurore and Mireille and having them do a special about us.”

The only response Adrien received was Marinette’s infamous, rarely used, mischievous smirk. A smirk he knows all to well and would hate to be on the receiving end of it.

Just a day later, Miraculous Out! a Ladybug sponsored website posted a video featuring Ladybug and Chat Noir themselves without the Miraculous Team, a rare sight nowadays. In the video, Ladybug wearing her newest outfit: dark leggings that are covered by a long slit skirt with the black and red polka dot pattern, matching combat boots, and a matching short sleeve turtle neck that is covered by a black motorcycle that ends but above her waist. Chat Noir now wearing leather pants with a muscle shirt that is often covered by a matching jacket with faux fur. His shows just as much as his younger teen version did if not a little more. For Ladybug, Marinette decided to keep her pigtails as her hair grew longer but opted for longer ribbons to be placed in her hair instead.

In the video, Ladybug and Chat Noir drops the biggest bomb to their fans. The iconic Paris duo is no longer just partners but officially brother and sister. That message put a stake through the hearts of LadyNoir shippers and the Ladyblog as it was the one eager for the two to become an item especially after a familiar voice under Lila Rossi predominately says that the two heroes are an item as she’s Ladybug’s best friend.

“For the past few months, Chat and I have been in an internal war with one another about how to announce this to Paris. This was mainly due to the additional attention to the LadyNoir shipping wars that were from the Ladyblog. Chat and I never and will never have any feelings for each other that aren’t platonic.” With that, Ladybug ends her statement and the video goes into its closing cards, basically saying stay tuned for other Miraculous news.

The second the screen turns black; Marinette turns to Adrien with the biggest smile on her face. Now all they need to do was announce that Adrien Agreste is no longer the face of his father’s company. This news was soon to be dropped once the photos from their family photoshoot drop.

The night before Paris is once again reckoned, the mischievous, Damian, and Marinette had a perfect view of seeing how two people can flirt around each other and not get the signs.

Marinette gave Damian for not ending the streaming on his end and taking off while she and Adrien shared a room to chat with their friends. Damian gave Marinette hidden signals on the verge of wanting to kill Jon and Adrien for their stupidity.

“If they don’t start dating in the next couple of hours, I will commit mass genocide,” Damian growls the moment Marinette decided to call him. Marinette laughs it off and smiles despite that he cannot see her, but he knows well enough.

“Let them be, it took us a moment to realize that we liked each other.”

Damian grunts unsure how to proceed. “They better figure this shit out soon.”

Marinette could only shake her head before the continue to talk about other things.

The following morning was great, well it was great until Marinette’s phone begins to blow up with notifications.

Adrien DuPain-Cheng @adrienwhopuns Papers finally approved, meet my new sista from another mother (@marinettewhomemes) [Attached to the tweet is a small collection of photos: (1) Marinette standing beside Adrien wearing tees that says “I’m the sister of a punster” and “I’m the brother of a mememer” (2) Adrien being surrounded by the entire DuPain-Cheng family holding a banner that says “It’s a new DuPain-Cheng” (3) Adrien pretending to pose as Marinette looks like a deer caught in the headlights behind him]

Marinette turns to her brother with a look of betrayal plastered against her face. Adrien didn’t have the decency to tell her about the handle change. There was no warning! No wonder Adrien had his phone on silent. Realizing that her phone will not shut up, Marinette turns off notification and narrows her eyes.

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes Replying to @adrienwhopuns Proud to call you my brother, you doof just try not to take over my room. #nolongeranonlychild #howmusthebeolder #punsvsmemes

This time Adrien looks up and narrows his eyes at Marinette. They were only a chair apart as it was a beautiful Saturday morning for the Dupain-Cheng household. Sabine was finishing the final add-ons for the strawberry and crème breakfast puffs.

“What’s going on you two?” Tom asks as he pours the drinks and set the cups down on the table.

“We’re internet famous, and Adri is trending on Twitter.” Marinette states with a deadpan face. Tom nearly makes a mess with the drinks but quickly catches himself.

“That’s good to hear,” Sabine says as she the tray of breakfast puffs over to the table.

Marinette and Adrien look at their mother with skepticism, it wasn’t like Sabine to be completely away from her children, but then again it doesn’t come as a shock. When Sabine and Tom accidentally came across the two teens coming home as their alter egos, nothing really surprises them anymore. That was one of the reasons why they had allowed the Miraculous team to hide out in the home of their other bakery.

Jon Kenting Me @jonnyboykent Replying to @adrienwhopuns I knew these photos were lit but I didn’t expect this!! @marinettewhomemes what were you doing in the background?

Marinette scoffs at Jon’s response to Adrien’s announcement tweet. She knew exactly what photo he was talking about and she doesn’t want to talk about it. Deciding that her breakfast was the best distraction from this ongoing shit show on Twitter, she begins to eat with peace on the mind.

Before Sabine took her seat, she called for the kwamis to join them for breakfast. All but Plagg ate in peace. Plagg wanted some cheese but after being on the receiving end of Mama Cheng’s glare he ate grumbling at every chance he got.

Adrien had finished his breakfast first; it was not because Jon had sent him a series of text messages begging for answers. Marinette watches her brother leave as she finishes her last bite and pulls out her phone.

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes Replying to @adrienwhopuns and @jonnyboykent What I do in the image is my business. Call me if you want the deeds.

She knew Jon wasn’t going to call her after posting that to the thread. Jon was probably in the middle of a phone call with Adrien before heading to sleep. Sabine and Tom watch their daughter leave the room with the kwamis trailing behind her, with smiles on their faces. To them, this makes it all worth it.

“Kitty, you coming or what? Luka and the others are ready to go.” Marinette shouts one day from the doorway of the house. She turns to see Luka standing sheepishly with his guitar on his back, Kagami with an eyebrow raises, and Chloe hanging off of Kagami’s arm examining her nails.

“I’m coming sheesh.” Adrien cries back before making himself known. Marinette rolls her eyes and walks out.

Sabine and Tom already in bakery, cannot wait to surprise their kids later this afternoon.

“How are things with you and Damian, Mars?” Kagami asks laying on her girlfriend’s lap as Chloe plays her hair.

Marinette heavily blushes. She and Damian have been dating for about six months after a couple of years of bouncing between each other. They ended up dating because Damian and his brothers ended up taking a private jet to Paris one evening and basically force the two into a closet. They spoke out their feelings and ended up trolling his brothers for a couple of days before announcing their newly made relationship status. Since Marinette isn’t seen in Gotham, the media has yet to link the two together as a couple.

“We’re fine, I’m more worried about kitten over here.” Marinette nudges Adrien’s shoulder who looks offended beyond belief.

“About what? I don’t have a problem.” Adrien counters as Luka plays his guitar.

“Your melody says otherwise.” The older teen states humming the tone to the melody.

“Luka!” Adrien screeches, his face turning red. The group laughs and proceeds to watch the clouds. The wind picks up.

“So how are things with Jon?” Chloe suddenly asks after a moment of silence. Everyone turns to Adrien who tries to look everywhere but at his friends. Marinette could see the rise in red reaching his ears.

“It’s nothing.” Adrien shutters out. The four looks to one another knowing the former blonde model was lying beyond belief.

“Uh huh…” Chloe sings the words out appearing behind the blonde male.

“He’s…” Adrien is stopped by his thoughts. What was Jon to him? A friend? A potential lover? His blush deepens at the thought of that. “He’s… I don’t know what to think.”

“You are in too deep for this,” Kagami states as she too saw what was becoming of her oldest friend. Adrien curls into himself unsure how to feel.

Marinette knows that deep down, Adrien was falling for Jon; however, it did make her wary. Adrien was quick to bond with Jon during the pen-pal program and nearly lost it when the program ended. If it wasn’t for the fact that they had exchanged numbers before the last, she doesn’t know what would have happened to Adrien. They were both going through a tough time when they joined the program. Adrien had a wake up called regarding harassment and learning that the real world wasn’t all fun and games while she, herself, was trying to rediscover the self-confidence that she had lost due to the bullying she had to endure because of Lila Rossi. It took months of therapy and talks with Damian for her to acknowledge that she wasn’t responsible for the person people created of her in their minds, and that was the tea.

Adrien’s wake up call was the reason he began spending more time with her and her family. Her parents say Adrien as the broken, lost boy he was and took him under their wing. Of course, Marinette wouldn’t change what happened for anything in the world.

Then there was an explosion happening in the background. Without speaking, the five split up to transform and regroup once they have all the details.

While Paris has grown used to somewhat daily Akuma attacks, they know how to avoid the fighting areas and proceed with their day. Sabine had left the bakery to go pick up three people from the airport.

Jonathon Kent had to beg his parents to allow him to go to Paris with Damian and Jason. Damian had wanted to surprise Marinette with a visit and Jason, well Jason just wanted fresh baked goods. Jon, on the other hand, just wanted to meet Adrien for the first time in person. For years, the two spoke through video chats, text messages, and twitter threats, but never had they had the chance to meet in-person. When Jon found out that Damian was planning on visiting Mars, he knew he just had to come. Their school wasn’t in session and if anything, really disastrous happens, he could fly back in no time.

“Hello boys,” Sabine greets grabbing their attention. Jason was the first to run over to the small frame woman with the speed that could match a dog.

“Hey, Sabine!” Jason greets back. Sabine narrows her eyes; she knows that Jason wants something, but she couldn’t place her finger on it.

“Hello again, Mrs. Cheng,” Damian adds walking over to his brute of a brother and the mother of his girlfriend.

“Hi, I’m Jon.” Jon gives the older woman his brightest smile.

“I can see why you and Adrien have bonded so easily.” Sabine chuckles lightly to which a blush crosses Jon’s face. Jon could hear the teasing that Jason was whispering to Damian about having a crush and a model, which only farther the blush.

Sabine sends him another smile. “Well, we should get going if we want to surprise Marinette and Adrien.” Clapping her hands, she begins to usher the boys in the direction of her car.

While driving across Paris, Sabine notices the swirls of ladybugs fixing up the city. This once gives her enough time to park, get the boys to settle, and start making dinner all before her children get home.

“Wow, this place is bigger than the last place? What happened?” Jason asks kicking his feet up onto the couch the second they arrived on the second level of the building. Sabine scolds the older male before explaining that with Adrien being added to the household and Marinette’s growing business, their old place was becoming cramp, and now that the two are longer attending Francoise Dupont, they could have to look farther out for a bigger home and bakery all while still owning the other one.

Damian took notice of the new photos hanged up on the walls. Of course, the photos that Adrien had posted on twitter, but along them are photos of a happier Marinette and Adrien acting like siblings. They had even recreated iconic sibling moments from television shows to make It feel real.

“Those two have made our lives so much better, and Sabine and I are glad that our little loaf has met you.” Damian turns to see Tom hovering over him. He had thought his girlfriend’s father was down in the bakery, but he was wrong. Damian wasn’t sure what to say, sure he had met Tom before and have grown used to the tall being, but even he knows when to picks his battles.

“I’m lucky to have her.” Damian states before walking away.

While Damian was already used to the environment of the Dupain-Cheng household, Jon on the other hand was having a dream. His excitement to finally seeing Adrien has finally caught up to him. So, imagine when he jumps off on the couch, nearly flying when the door’s knob begins to jiggle.

Their eyes locked, blue meeting green for the first time outside of a screen. Jon stares agape at Adrien who stares back with the same energy.

Marinette who took notice of the situation sneaks past the two and into the arms of her boyfriend. Jason watches from behind with a bowl of popcorn in hand waiting for the other shoe to drop.

“H-h-how?” Adrien’s voice squeaks before pulling Jon into his arms.

Even though the two are lost within each other’s thoughts they could still hear Jason’s laughter and the smack that follows.

“I practically beg my parents to see you,” Jon answers as just as flustered as Adrien. “Then begged Damian to bring me.” He quickly adds looking away from the blonde.

For a moment the two stay in their own world not noticing the flashes of light and whispers.

Not from afar, Marinette tries not to laugh, her lips purse into a fine line. Damian watches shaking his head and tries to grab some of Jason’s popcorn.

The next day, Adrien ran out of the bakery with Jon right behind him. They were going to visit Andre’s ice cream cart. All under the pretense of being just friends, but all who knew them thought otherwise. Marinette had decided to skip this trip in favor of walking the Seine with Damian then planning on making Jason a new leather jacket. Jason wanted to check out the crime rate in Paris walking around the area.

Adrien DuPain-Cheng @adrienwhopuns Ice cream from Andre is always the best especially now that I’d shared the experience with @jonnyboykent [Attached is a photo of Adrien and Jon holding ice cream cones with matching flavors that are similar to their hair, lip, and eye colors along with other flavors. In the background is Andre waving at the two with a large smile]

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes Replying to @adrienwhopuns 🤩Aw… you guys look cute having your outing an all that. How was the ice cream?

Jon Kenting Me @jonnyboykent Replying to @adrienwhopuns and @marinettewhomemes The ice cream was delicious. 10/10 recommend it.

Adrien laughs the moment he looks at their replies. He then turns to Jon, who was on the verge of eating his last scoop of ice cream. Jon, noticing that Adrien is staring at him, blushes lightly before they continue to walk. The walk was peaceful until…

“Adrien!” The two due turns around to see a tall dark-skin teen running towards them. Beyond the teen are two females with varying facial expressions.

“Hey Nino, haven’t heard from you since college graduation.” Adrien murmurs the second Nino had gotten closer to the two. Jon could only watch, clearly intrigued by this new encounter. He had heard much about Nino from Adrien and the downfall of their friendship as the final years of college came to end.

“Yeah dude, I wish we could have hanged out more. But you know how it is.” Nino states rubbing the back of his neck. “Who’s your friend?”

“Nino, this is Jon, he’s a friend of mine and the friend of Mari’s boyfriend that came to visit us.” Jon could feel the tension growing as the two girls come closer. The ombre haired teen, looked like she wanted to yell or hit something awhile the other wearing clashing oranges looks like she is about to commit murder. Upon seeing this, Jon moves closer to Adrien for support.

“That cool, dude, but when were you going to tell me that you and Marinette are siblings? Lila had gotten the whole class thinking you two were a thing.” Unbeknown to Nino, he had just proved the thoughts that Adrien and Marinette have been theorizing since the two had been chosen to go to a different Lycée than the one that most of their former classmates went to.

“Why would Lila even think that? You know what I don’t even want to know.” Adrien says. Subtly, he tightens his around the edge of his shirt. “Mari and I have practically been siblings for a couple of years now, and we’re much happy about that.”

“That’s good to hear, man,” Nino says unsure where this conversation will go. The aspiring DJ could feel the gnawing questions that Alya was soon going to throw at the blonde the moment he is done.

“Sunshine,” Alya explodes in the background to which all three males roll their eyes at. “We haven’t seen you in two years and this is how you treat us. Lila was your ex at the very least say hi to my gurl.”

Jon looks to the reporter as if she had grown a second head. Never once had Adrien mention being in a relationship with the liar, and for the years that he has known Adrien, he’s been single. In fact, the only times Lila even mentions is when she makes an outcry on twitter within Adrien’s threads. Jon knows that when the announcement was made, this Lila person had the biggest voice; commenting questions that Adrien didn’t need or want to answer.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about Alya. I haven’t been in a relationship since I tried it out with Kagami and that was back in college. I’m as single as a pringle and not looking for anyone.” The subtle side-eyed look to Jon said otherwise. Jon could have sworn his face turn red after realizing what the blonde had done.

Alya scoffs, “Yeah right. Lila told me you had done out on dates after we all left Dupont, she even had pictures to prove it.” She then grabs hold of Lila’s wrist and pulls the girl closer to three. Lila batters her eyes, trying to be a flirt, little did she know.

“Alya, anyone can fake a photo, there is a reason Photoshop exists. Knowing Lila, she probably showed you photos from our shoots and changed them. She did it once to Mari, and I have no doubt in mind that she did it again.” Narrowing his eyes, Adrien glance away from Alya and onto Lila.

“C’mon Adrikins,” Jon and Adrien wince at the old nickname Chloe had given the blonde be used by Lila, “We had so many good memories together. As much as I miss them, I’m much happier with my long-distance relationship with Damiboo.” The liar then gushes to which Alya joins in for.

“And who is this Damiboo, you speak of?” Jon asks, speaking for the first time since his day with Adrien was interrupted.

“Oh, it’s Damian Wayne, of course. He’s such a sweetheart. You know, I could introduce you to him sometime.” Adrien and Jon turn to each other, both holding in the laughter that was threatening to come out. Yeah, Damian is a sweetheart but only to animals and Marinette, beyond those two things, he’s everything but.

“Good to know, well it was nice seeing you guys again.” Adrien waves to the girls before turning to Nino whispering. “If you need to get away from them some time, DM me and I’ll give you my newest number.”

Nino’s eyes widen in excitement before he quickly nods. Nino misses his best bud and it was hurting him to see Adrien living his truth while he is stuck with everyone that decided to remain together.

While walking back to the bakery, Jon had some interesting things to say about the whole encounter. Never has he ever heard anyone call Damian by that nickname, he is amazed out how he handled the situation knowing how much mental damage the liar had placed on Adrien and to an extend Marinette.

“I’m sorry our outing was ruined by them, I wasn’t—” Adrien tries to apologize but is interrupted by Jon stopping and placing his hand on the blonde’s shoulder.

“I had fun regardless of them. Wanna try again later tonight, perhaps a movie.” Jon sends Adrien a reassuring smile who nods happily at the offer. It was a good offer and gives them more alone time before he had to leave with Damian and Jason.

“I’d like that.”

When the boys had returned to the bakery, they are greeted by Sabine handing an order to a customer before mention that everyone is in the living room. Adrien quickly grabs Jon’s wrist and moves to the mentioned room.

Marinette is annihilating Jason on Ultimate Mecha Strike III, his cries of defeat bring music to Damian’s ears as he reads a novel.

“So, did anything exciting happened?” Marinette asks her eyes never leaving the screen. Flawless victory. Jason sighs and turns to the duo then blanches. He hands Marinette a twenty and shakes his head.

“Nothing happened…well except running into Nino,” Adrien answers, though he wonders why Jason had given Marinette a twenty.

“That’s good,” Marinette finally turns to him and waves her controller. “Wanna play around, and while I’m kicking your butt you can tell me all about your encounter with Nino.” Adrien shrugs and takes the controller that Jason had left on the couch to proceed to raid the fridge. No matter what time of day, Jason always raid the fridge for food.

“So, Kent, when are you going to tell him?” He heard Damian ask as the video game’s music raises and his attention turns to something else.

The day slowly became nighttime to which Jon and Adrien had decided to invite Damian and Marinette to the movies. Marinette took one look at them before saying no and for them to have fun. However, what they didn’t hear was her saying, “Come back dating or not at all” after they had left the bakery.

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes Loverboy 1 and loverboy 2 went to movies. Should I place a bet on what they’re going to see? I swear it will be a sap or action movie, knowing my brother. [Attached is a poll with three movie suggestions.]

Sending off the tweet, she looks up to her boyfriend’s chin. They were resting on her bed looking at the starry night sky from her skylight. Damian had his arms wrapped around her waist as she rests her head on his chest. They love snuggling together especially when they know that his brothers, specifically Jason, weren’t going to barge in on them.

“Fifty saying that they won’t confess even after seeing my tweet,” Marinette states lifting herself up to play with Damian’s hair.

“That’s a fool’s bet, Angel.” Damian counters causing Marinette to pout. She hates it when he’s right, but look fifty euros or dollars can do a lot for her.

“Eh, you’re right.” Marinette decides to switch the topic. “I’m going to miss you when you leave in a couple of days. It’s fun having you around.”

“We won’t be separate for long; we have video chats to keep us company.” Damian knows full damn well that video chat isn’t the same as seeing her in person. His own family loves it when Marinette’s around him because he acts his age, a normal sixteen-year teen.

“Dams, it’s not the same.” Marinette playfully hits his chest. Damian kisses Marinette’s forehead before smothering her kisses on the cheek. Marinette’s nose scrunches with the amount of love he is showing her.

“As much as I love being in your arms, you know how papa gets when it’s late and you’re not in your guest room with Jay-Jay.” Damian groans but he understands. Instead of staying at a hotel, Tom and Sabine were willing to let the boys stay at their home with strict sleeping guidelines, more specifically for Damian.

“I’ll see you in the morning, Angel.” As he pecks her lips, Marinette smiles then waves her boyfriend a farewell.

Adrien DuPain-Cheng @adrienwhopuns Can someone tell @jonnyboykent that the movie wasn’t scary? It was a good non-horror movie. [Attached is a photo of Jon behind Adrien covering his eyes.]

Adrien and Jon had arrived late from the movies that night. Hugging each other, neither one of them wanted to let go. Jon ended up brushing Adrien’s hair with his hands as Adrien just rest his head against the half-Kryptonian’s chest. They stayed like that for a moment before crashing on the living room couch.

When Marinette woke up the following morning, she immediately took photos of them sleeping. Yes, these will be very helpful when giving her in-law speech at their wedding or for blackmail, whichever one comes first.

“Wake up you goofs and tell me about last night.” Marinette playfully hits Adrien’s leg forcing the poor teen to groan and move. He glares at Marinette like a cat that didn’t want to be disturbed.

“Morning Mars, where’s Damian?” Jon asks looking around as he wipes the sleep away from his eyes. Marinette answers with a shrug. “Ugh, I’m going to go get changed.” Jon then moves and leaves.

The second Jon was out of hearing range, Adrien looks down and murmurs, “I think I like Jon.”

“Of course, you do, you won’t be hanging out with him otherwise.”

“No, no, like more than just a friend.”

Marinette’s eyes widen with excitement. She tries to contain her squeal. “I knew it! You got to tell him before he leaves.”

Adrien rubs his arm; a faint blush crosses his face. “I don’t know; I don’t want to ruin what we have and—”

“And nothing, you like him, kitty.” Marinette became determined to get the two teens together.

In the other room, Damian was having the same conversation with Jon.

“About time,” Jason says putting on his jacket.

“Last night was so amazing, but—”

“But nothing Kent, walk up to him and kiss him,” Damian states crossing his arms sharing a knowing look with his brother.

“If anything, ask Pixie to help set the mood. I’m sure she already has it planned out.”

“I don’t know…” Jon literally was avoiding his best friend’s glare at him. However, they were right, but was he ready to destroy three years of friendship for a romance? Nope, the idea seems to be too much of a risk.

The two Wayne boys growl out in frustration, this was hopeless.

Damian, Jon, and Jason’s last day in Paris was met with tearful goodbyes and relaxation. Marinette was already making plans to visit Damian in Gotham while Adrien and Jon danced around each other.

They flirted opening with one another but never made any advances. It was driving everyone insane.

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes Imma about to kill a bitch if these two don’t kiss already.

The day was slowly coming to an end. After a series of goodbye hugs and kisses, Sabine had taken the boys to the airport. Never once did Adrien no Jon admitted their feelings to another and that aggravated Marinette to no end. When will the two just admit it already?

Jon and Adrien resumed their daily chats messaging whether it was through video or text. Adrien would come out smiling after each message which made the family happy to see once again after a day of pouting Adrien.

For months everything was going great until a news article across seas mention that the American heroes are in trouble. Superboy is down along with a few other young heroes. At first, the article was nothing and that changed when Damian had called Marinette and ask for Adrien. Jonathon was in the hospital. Immediately, Adrien went into a massive panic, nearly becoming akumatized if it wasn’t for Marinette grabbing the butterfly and purifying it before any damage could be done.

For days, Adrien was restless and worried. He calls Damian for updates every day hoping for a miracle. Tikki and Plagg reassured him that he’ll make it out. This goes on for a week. His twitter account less than active. He barely eats, pays attention in school, and nearly failed an exam if it wasn’t for Marinette.

Then on one faithful late-night Adrien’s phone rings. He was barely functioning when he had answered. It was Jon, he was okay and no need to worry. That short phone call didn’t ease Adrien’s worry.

Marinette’s and Damian’s one-year anniversary was coming up. Adrien and Jon’s daily chats became nothing but scarce. He would try and message the half-Kryptonian on more than one occasion. Sometimes he would receive a reply, sometimes he didn’t. Adrien knows that Damian is coming back to Paris to surprise Marinette. Marinette was working on a new gown to show to Damian as a tribute to their anniversary. Helping Damian was keeping Jon off his mind.

“Luka what am I supposed to do, I like him, I really like him,” Adrien says laying down on the chaise in the Miraculous team HQ back at the old bakery. Luka sat on a stool with a clipboard in hand and his guitar place beside him. This was becoming an everyday occurrence for the two of them.

“Uh-huh,” Luka nods writing something down before replacing the clipboard with his guitar. Playing a few notes, Luka knew what to say to Adrien and as a plus, the music calmed Adrien down just enough to relax. “Have you tried sending a letter?”

Adrien thought about it. Sending a letter wasn’t something he did for Jon since the pen-pal program ended and before they started to call and text each other. It was a start at best, but would Jon receive his letter in time? Would he even read it? Has he changed addresses? Too many questions ran through the poor blonde’s mind.

So, after thinking about long and hard, Adrien opted to send Jon a letter. He had to text Jason to make sure he had the correct address to the letter to Jon. It took him a day to write and have Marinette proofread it. The letter was no ordinary “how you’re doing” letter but a confession from the heart. He had poured his heart out into the letter mentioning every time he felt whole when being around Jon. A few teardrops onto the sheet of paper at least once or twice.

After sending the letter, it felt like something was lifted from his chest. Marinette was there to support him and hug him as he cries out his worries.

Nette from Mars @marinettewhomemes I never thought that I would have experienced a one-year anniversary with someone who is not from France, regardless, Happy Anniversary Dami! [Attached is silhouette photo of Damian kissing Marinette’s hand]

While Adrien was helping Tom and the kwamis calm down Marinette, who was is a mass panic about today, Sabine had gone to go pick up a group of people from the airport. Originally, it was supposed to be Damian who was going to come to Paris alone, but that plan changed with an addition of a way more people.

“I can’t believe, Demon Spawn managed to keep a relationship going for a year,” Tim says sipping on a cup of coffee that he had brought from the airport. Everyone in the car was talking amongst themselves congratulating or teasing Damian.

Sabine could only smile at the commotion that was happening in her car. It was always nice to see them, but it does disappoint her that Bruce couldn’t make it, unlike the boys.

When they had arrived at the bakery, the majority of new visitors ran inside. Sabine could hear the cheers and screams of happiness from her location outside. She turns to the lone figure who was rubbing his arm anxiously and gives him a soft smile. Sabine then walks inside and seconds later Marinette and Adrien run outside. Damian appears behind Marinette wrapping his arms around her as Adrien madly dashes over to the lone figure.

“Jon!” Adrien cries out crashing his body into Jon’s. Jon holds Adrien tightly as tears threaten to shed from eyes. “What are you doing here?” Adrien breaks the embrace to look him in the eyes.

“I wanted to say I’m sorry for how I treated you. I shouldn’t have—” Adrien's lips brush against Jon’s effectively cutting the taller dark-haired male off.

In the background, Marinette looks like she’s about to commit murder. “Great now I have to share an anniversary with him too.” It may have come off as mean but the mischievous glint in her eyes says otherwise. “Have him home before dinner, Jon.” She then yells back before Damian twirls her around and takes her inside.

“I’ve been wanting to do that for six months,” Adrien says breaking the kiss for air. Red covers Jon’s face as he pulls Adrien in for another kiss.

“And I have been wanting to do that for a year.” Jon then says breaking the second kiss. This it was Adrien’s face that turns bright red rivaling Ladybug’s former suit.

Adrien DuPain-Cheng @adrienwhopuns It’s official, I’m no longer single as a pringle! Thx mom for taking this photo! #yesimgay [Attached is a photo of Adrien and Jon kissing in the sunset facing away from the camera]

After five years of dating, Damian had proposed to Marinette first. Then Jon had to go and propose a little under a year later to Adrien. Both Marinette and Adrien had said yes to their significant other. What really got into a heated argument was planning the wedding. Marinette wanted to wait a year or two before walking down the aisle and Adrien wanted to get it done and over with. However, that was not the case as everyone wanted to get involved. Tom and Sabine wanted to make the cake, the Wayne’s and the Kent’s wanted to fund the weddings, and Marinette had to make the outfits for her and Adrien.

After waiting for a little under two years, the two pairs decided a double wedding would be less expensive than paying for two separate events and it work out seeing they share an anniversary day anyways.

Then the royal day has arrived.

Tom and Sabine are crying as they help their children get into their designated outfits. Marinette was wearing a laced white ball gown with red accents. Sabine had a family heirloom that the women wear at their weddings to give to Marinette. Tikki had given Marinette her ladybug luck as part of her wedding gift to the guardian and her chosen. Adrien was wearing a suit that was similar to Tom’s when he had married Sabine. Marinette had also made him a Chat Noir theme bow tie to match.

Soon the music was blaring throughout the venue. At the altar, Damian and Jon were anxious beyond belief. They thought, telling they're significant others about their nightly activities was anxious, but this takes the cake. Together they wait for the rest of the procession to end and the music to pick up at the arrival of their loved ones. At the end of the hall, Tom stands in the middle with Marinette and Adrien to the side of him. Tom tries to hold it together as he walks them down to the alter. Sabine was already in tears along with Lois as they were sitting close to each other.

Everything running smoothly. The officiant would speak to then as a whole, just that they had practice in rehearsals until the exchange of vows. Marinette and Damian had done theirs first it was romantic and just right for them. Then Adrien and Jon had followed suit. Adrien’s vows were very similar to the letter he had sent Jon all those years ago as Jon made the promise of never leaving him in life or in death.

After exchanging the rings everyone at the venue could see the anticipation to say “I do” between the two couples. In fact, the Officiant could barely the pronouncement of marriage before they had kissed their soon-to-be husbands or wife. Everyone applauded. Marinette was resting her head against Damian’s shoulder interlocking their hands in the process as Adrien was holding Jon closely never wanting to let go.

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[galahadwilder]

Kitty Missed the Message, Pt. 2

Part 1

*

"There's thousands of people named 'Adrien' in Paris!" Plagg protests from Adrien's inside shirt pocket. "There's no way she meant you."

"And how many of those Adriens does Ladybug know?" Adrien mumbles, gazing down at the lid on his coffee cup. He sits—no, lies—against the front steps of the school, too tired to even bother trying to keep his back straight. Between the thrill of his new love life and the confusion of her dropping his name, he didn't get any sleep last night; he's allowed to slump a little.

"A lot of them, probably!" Plagg says. "She saves lots of people."

"And how many people has she given a Miraculous to?" Adrien says, gritting his teeth as he contemplates his coffee, then throwing back a sip fast enough to miss his tongue entirely—though it still scalds the back of his throat. He gasps, hacking.

He hates the taste of coffee. Even the burning is better.

"Um," Plagg says, squirming. "Ten?"

"Exactly," Adrien rasps, trying to clear his throat. "They can't all be Adrien. And since she knows Chloé..."

Plagg snuggles grumpily into his chest. "Sometimes I wish you weren't so smart," the Kwami says.

"Too bad you're stuck with me," Adrien says, looking down the street contemplatively. Where is Nino? He's fairly certain he impressed on him the urgency of his dilemma.

As bad as Adrien.

"Am I really that oblivious?" he mutters to himself.

"Well you didn't notice me," Nino says from behind him.

Adrien shrieks, leaping from the steps and stumbling onto the sidewalk, all hackles and hissing. He can feel the pressure on his scalp as his hair tries to stand on end, only to get dragged down by its own weight.

"Dude?" Nino says, shock written across his face.

Adrien looks down at where he flung his coffee, trying to straighten himself without meeting Nino's eyes and hiding the blush burning up his cheeks. "I'm fine!" he yelps. Being a cat is so embarrassing sometimes.

"Dude!" Nino cackles. "I haven't seen you jump like that since the thing with the cucumber!"

"I thought I asked you not to bring that up again," Adrien grumbles, splashing the sole of his foot in his spilled coffee and spreading it dejectedly across the sidewalk. A waste of good caffeine, that is.

Nino’s mouth twists. “Ah. Right,” he says, gently taking Adrien’s forearm. “Sorry, bro.”

”It’s fine,” Adrien says with a slight smile. “I did look like a doof, didn’t I?”

”The doofiest,” Nino says with a nod and a grin. He steps back and folds his arms. “What was so urgent that you needed me at the butt-end of the morning?”

Adrien opens his mouth, closes it again. "I, uh..." he begins. "You... remember that girl I keep saying I like? The one I work with?"

Nino raises an eyebrow. "The one who's not interested in you?"

Adrien's stomach bottoms out. "Yeah," he says. "Or, well. No?” He looks down at his feet, scratching at the back of his neck. How to put this? “It's gotten... weird."

Nino crosses his arms with a wry grin, sinking his weight backward into an uncharacteristically sassy sort of pose, the one he’s been doing more often the more time he spends with Alya. "Weird how?"

Adrien closes his eyes, breathes in, breathes out. "According to her,” he says, picking his thumbnails into his fingers, “yesterday was our one-month anniversary."

Nino’s silence is somehow louder than any words would have been. Adrien opens one eye, wincing, bracing for judgement, only to see confused pride on his friend’s face.

"So... wait," Nino finally says, pushing up his glasses and rubbing his sinuses with his fingers. "Let me—let—” He shakes his head. “You're dating her now?"

Adrien shrugs in distress. "Yes?" he says with another wince. "I'm... it's confusing." He raises his fingers to his lips, the memory of the softness of Ladybug's mouth on his own warming his face. "She... did kiss me last night. Unprompted."

Nino's eyes grow wide. "Dude," he says, holding out his fist. "Dap."

Adrien taps his knuckles against Nino's, still a little too confused to properly appreciate the situation.

“Come on,” Nino says. “Let’s head inside, we can talk while sitting.”

Adrien nods, following without really meaning to move his legs at all.

“So what changed?” Nino says as they walk down the hallway toward their lockers.

“What do you mean?” Adrien says, his eyes wandering. His head still feels a little fuzzy, to be honest.

Nino shrugs. “Well, I mean...” he says, “there’s gotta have been some kind of change, right? That led to her changing her mind?”

The side of Adrien’s mouth twists. “I got nothing,” he mumbles.

Nino turns to stare at him, then snorts and rolls his eyes. “Not surprised,” he says. “You’re not always the best at noticing things like that.”

”That’s... actually why I wanted to talk to you,” Adrien says. “Am I... really that oblivious?”

Nino stops walking and sighs. ”I...” He catches his tongue between his teeth. “You know how pretty much everyone we know has had a crush on Marinette at some point?"

Adrien gives a small smile. “Of course,” he says. That’s pretty much a given.

Nino nods. "Did you ever wonder why she never took anyone up on it until last month?"

"Yeah," Adrien says. "She had a guy she liked, right?"

Nino’s shoulders slump. "Yeah," He says. "You."

Adrien's train of thought comes to a screeching halt. "What?" he says.

Nino reaches out and claps Adrien’s shoulder. “She had a crush on you, dude.”

Adrien blinks. “But, her new boyfriend... wasn’t he the guy?”

Nino snorts. “Nope,” he says. “It was you, bro. And you were the only one who never knew.”

Adrien feels like lightning has been rammed into his skull. As bad as Adrien... it couldn’t be, right?

There’s no way.

*

Class isn’t as difficult as he was expecting. It’s worse. Nino’s words aren’t much to go on—in fact, they’re nothing at all, but it’s the first clue he’s had. So his brain, scrambled from exhaustion and caffeine as it is, can’t stop flitting around Marinette.

First: Kwamibuster. He’d been certain she was Ladybug, all the evidence he’d needed had been there, they were so alike, so brilliant and energetic... and then he’d seen them right next to each other. Different people? Illusion? And then Marinette had suddenly picked up a boyfriend, one who nobody in the class had met, and Adrien had been... so disappointed, but he could never pinpoint why.

When was that, anyway?

Was it a month ago?

He can’t pay any attention to anything that’s happening in front of him—the only thing he can hear is Marinette, Marinette, Marinette. It can’t be her, right? But his brain won’t let it go.

”So, how was your anniversary date?” Alya says with what Adrien can only assume is a sly grin. He can see her exact expression, even though he’s trying desperately not to turn around. Not to let on that he’s listening.

Marinette makes a sound like she’s swallowed her tongue. “Uh! W-weird, actually.”

Alya hums. “Weird how?” He hears the flannel of her shirt slide against the desk as she leans toward Marinette. “How’d the ‘plan’ go?”

Marinette squeaks. Adrien squirms in his seat, staring at his hands, screaming in his head not to turn around. He’s ignoring the way Nino is staring at him, trying to hold still.

”Come on, girl, spill!” Alya whispers. “Did you kiss him?”

”Yep!” Marinette squeaks.

”Oh my god you’re so red!” Alya cackles. Then her voice drops to a hiss. “Tell me everything!”

Marinette swallows. “I mean... it was really weird?” she says. “He... didn’t know we were dating?”

Adrien’s blood rushes to his ears like a vise around his skull, crushing inward. Didn’t know we were dating. That’s—it’s impossible.

Alya snorts. “Girl, are you sure you’re not dating Adrien?”

Adrien doesn’t hear Marinette’s response. He doesn’t hear much of anything until lunchtime, really.

Marinette is Ladybug. He’s going to explode.

*

“Hi, Mari!” he says as soon as she closes her locker.

She shrieks, leaping backward, scattering her papers on the ground, and Adrien immediately feels a rush of guilt at surprising her—but cats are 60% bastard, and he can’t help taking a little joy in it.

Marinette heaves a breath, pressing her hand to her chest. “Adrien!” she gasps. “You’ve gotta stop doing that!”

Adrien feels a grin spread across his face. “Never,” he drawls, leaning a bit into her space. “You’re too much fun to scare.”

Marinette smirks, pressing a finger to his sternum. “Well maybe I’ll just start sneaking up on you.”

Adrien’s heart begins to beat hard in his chest at her touch, at her smile. Oh, it’s her, it’s her, it’s her. And she’s not scared of him anymore, and now he knows exactly why that is...

”Can—can I talk to you?” he gasps out. “In private?”

Marinette’s eyebrows tighten, concern in her eyes. “Everything okay?”

It strikes him through the ribs, the way she cares about him, the way she makes his problems hers, and he knows she deserves the universe. He’s loved her, both of her, since the day they met, and she’s loved both of him, and if she asked him to steal the sun for her he’d burn himself alive snatching it from the sky. “Everything’s fine!” he says, gripping her arm. “Everything’s... great, actually.” He flashes her a smile, his fan’s favorite smile, hoping to put her at ease.

Instead, she tenses. “That’s your fake smile,” she says, her eyes narrowing.

Adrien blinks. “You can tell?” he says.

Marinette’s eyes widen, and her face goes bright red. “I—uh—”

Adrien bites his lip. Right, she’s been in love with him forever—knowing how she is, how the hammer-force of her attention slams down on everything she cares about, she probably noticed everything about him. It’s a wonder she didn’t figure out his identity.

”It’s fine!” he says. “I was just—trying to put you at ease, you know?”

Marinette sets her jaw and nods, glancing around the locker room, cataloguing everyone in the room the way she does when she’s trying to work out a Lucky Charm. “Classroom’s empty?”

Adrien nods. “Classroom.”

*

Marinette sits down on his desk, crossing her legs and leaning forward. “What’s up?”

Adrien looks away, breathes in. “How’s things with your boyfriend?”

Marinette blinks. “Adrien?” she says. There’s a note of... something in her voice. Hope? Anger? Disappointment? Maybe all three. You’re paying attention to me now? it seems to say.

“Last night was your anniversary, right?” Adrien says, looking at her. The pigtails. The eyes, bluer than blue. The earrings he’s only ever seen her take off once—the day Lady Noire showed up instead of Ladybug. Everything about her is the same, even the fire in her eyes.

Marinette’s eyes narrow. “Adrien, if this is about—”

”To be fair, My Lady,” he interrupts, slashing a Chat smile across his face, “you never actually told me we were dating.”

Marinette’s face goes slack, her mouth open, her eyes wide. “I—what?” she whispers. “You... no. No way. You—you can’t...” She straightens, breathing in, gathering herself. “Kitty?” she whispers.

Adrien grins, pressing one arm to his waist and throwing the other out wide with a bow. “Always at your service,” he says.

Suddenly he’s halfway to the floor, falling backwards, Marinette’s tiny hands seizing bunches of his lapels, her lips strawberry-sweet on his. They slam against the ground, together, entwined, gasping, together. Peppering each other with kisses.

“Kitty—”

“My Lady—”

“Princess—”

”Adrien—”

”Marinette—”

”I love you,” he gasps, clutching her chest against his own, and she stiffens.

”I... have been waiting to—to hear you say that... for—for two years,” she stammers.

He presses a kiss to her temple. “I’ve been saying it in private every day,” he says. “And I will say it to you every day for as long as you want it.”

Plagg snorts. “I can confirm,” he says. “Every frickin’ day with this kid. Both identities, too!”

Marinette giggles. “You should hear some of the stuff I said about you,” she says. Then her eyes widen. “Or—maybe not, please don’t—”

Tikki giggles from inside her purse. “I’m telling him anyway!”

Marinette’s eyes shoot to her bag. “Betrayal!” she hisses.

Adrien giggles, and Marinette laughs too, and the two of them just dissolve into laughter. Then, suddenly, Marinette stops.

”Oh,” she says. “Oh, no.”

Adrien blinks. “My Lady?”

Marinette fixes her burning gaze on his eyes. “What are we going to tell Alya?”

[whorefordean]

the only exception

JJ Maybank x reader

tw: i don’t think so?

word count: 1.3k

requested: yes! (by @tonyedwardstarkk)

It’s hard falling in love with your best friend.  Especially when you know they don’t feel the same way.  And JJ knew you didn’t feel the same way.  Not when you had a type that was the complete opposite of JJ.  

You were currently looking at pictures of Tom Holland.  And JJ was, unbeknownst to you, jealous and hurt.  Sure you weren’t his girlfriend, but did you really have to drool over your celebrity crush like that?  Salt in an open wound.  

JJ looked around The Wreck, praying that Kiara would bring your food, so you’d finally stop drooling.  His prayers were answered as Kie was bringing over four plates of food for her friends.  

“I get off in 20 minutes.  Boneyard?” she asked you.  You locked your phone and nodded while thanking her as she sat your plate down.  Kie nodded back and went back to finish out her shift.

Twenty minutes later, she came out taking her apron off and telling her father goodbye.  

You, JJ, John B, and Pope stood up to meet Kie at the front door of her father’s restaurant.  You all waved to Mr. Carrera as you left.

The five of you piled into John B’s van and headed to the Boneyard.  It was already nearing 10 pm, and the sun had set an hour ago.  As you pulled in, you heard the music playing loudly.  You all climbed out of the van and made your way to the beach.  

It was a few hours later, and the kegger was in full swing now.  You were completely wasted, now dancing alongside Kie.  John B and JJ were refilling drinks, only finding it fair since a few other pogues had been doing it for hours instead of enjoying the party.  You lost Pope soon after you arrived. He probably went to find a touron to talk about morgues with.  Who knows.  

JJ watched as you danced along to the song.  You were so graceful despite your closed eyes and flushed cheeks.  You bounced around with Kie before deciding your cup was too empty for your liking.  You motioned to your cup and Kie nodded.  

As you approached the keg that JJ and John B were standing by, you smiled and stumbled a bit.  

“Easy,” John B laughed while reaching an arm out to help you.  You laughed as well as you finally balanced yourself.  

“I was here for a refill, but I don’t think I need it,” you laughed out.  JJ chuckled softly as you held your cup out for more alcohol.  

JJ hesitantly grabbed your cup, only filling it halfway.  You pouted as he handed your cup back to you.  

“I’m not a Touron, JJ,” you argued.  Your bottom lip was puckered out and JJ groaned.  How was he supposed to say no when you looked that adorable?  

JJ grabbed your cup again, finally filling it up.  You squealed, a bright smile now replacing the pout you once had.  Your eyes lit up as you quickly leaned to kiss JJ on the cheek.  

“Thanks, J,” you smiled at him one more time before returning to Kie.  JJ’s face flushed and he avoided John B’s amused gaze.  

“When are you gonna tell her?” John B teased his best friend.  

“I’m not, John B,” JJ groaned.  His hands were fumbling with his rings nervously.  

“Why not?  She wouldn’t reject you, you know,” John B tried to encourage JJ.  

“I’m not her type.  We all know this.  She has a thing for guys with brown hair and brown eyes, and, if you haven’t noticed, I don’t fit either of those standards,” JJ stated sadly.  He glanced your way to find you talking giddily to Kiara.  Kie’s eyes were wide and she had a huge grin on her face.  

JJ heart ached knowing he’d never be what you wanted.  

But there you were, telling Kie how much you liked JJ.  

“He’s my only exception, though.  My only exception,” you slurred out happily.  Kiara looked at you wildly.  

“What?” you asked her, genuinely confused in your drunken state.  Kiara had a few drinks, but she was nowhere near drunk.  

“You have to tell him, y/n!” Kiara told you.  You blushed and shook your head.

“I can’t tell my best friend I love him, Kiara!  No pogue on pogue macking!  Plus, he probably doesn’t even feel that way.  That would be so embarrassing, Kie,” you whined.  

“Oh, trust me.  He definitely feels the same way,” Kiara reassured while nodding over to the blond boy.  You glanced over to see him staring intently at you.  

“He’s probably just looking at you, Kie.  We all know he has a thing for you,” you reasoned.  You quickly looked away from JJ, heart aching the longer you watched him watch Kie.  

“See!  She keeps looking at you, JJ,” John B spoke excitedly.  JJ shook his head.  

“She’s probably just looking at you, John B.  You are her type,” JJ pointed out.  John B groaned and grabbed JJ’s shoulders.  

“I’m telling you, man.  It’s you,” John B spoke firmly.  

“Go talk to her,” John B encouraged while nudging John B in your direction.  

“He’s coming over,” Kiara told you.  Your eyes went wide as she pushed you closer to JJ and ran to John B.  

“Who do you think will confess first?” Kiara asked John B as they watched the two of you.  

“Oh, definitely y/n.  She’s too drunk not to,” John B explained.  Kiara nodded in agreement.  

You approached JJ awkwardly.  JJ smiled at you nervously. 

“Hey, JJ,” you smiled at him sweetly.  

“Hi, y/n,” JJ chuckled softly.  

“So Kiara just abandoned you,” JJ joked.  You laughed and nodded. 

“Seems that way,” You answered while looking behind JJ to glare at Kie.  Her and John B laughed at the two of you.  

“Why are we being so awkward, right now?” JJ asked seriously.  His question caught you off guard.  

“It’s not awkward,” you laughed nervously.  JJ just watched you for a second before you sighed.  

“Okay, maybe it’s a little awkward,” you agreed.  

“I know you have a crush on John B.  I mean it makes sense,” JJ rushed out.  You furrowed your brows as you stood in front of him.  

“What?” you laughed out.  JJ furrowed his brows as well.  

“You don’t have to hide it.  I see the way you’re always looking at him when you think he isn’t looking.  Trust me I know what that’s like,” JJ mumbled the last part.  

“I definitely don’t have a crush on John B, JJ,” you blushed.  

“No, seriously.  I get it.  He’s exactly your type,” JJ continued rambling.  

“JJ, you are my only exception,” you told him.  JJ looked at you confused.  

“What?” JJ asked.

“I know that I have a type, JJ. And yea, John B does, technically, fit into my type.  But I’m not into him.  You are the only exception of my type.  You, JJ.  It’s you that I’m always looking at,” you confessed.  Wow, this was way easier than you thought it would be.  Maybe it was the endless refills you kept getting.  

“Really?” JJ questioned, still unsure if you were playing some sort of twisted joke on him.  

“JJ, have I ever lied to you?” You pointed out.  

“I mean I did ask you once if you had any exceptions to your type, and you said no,” JJ teased.  

“I couldn’t just say it was you, you doof,” You laughed while swatting his arm.  JJ laughed with you before pulling you into his arms.  

“I told you she would confess first,” John B told Kiara smartly. 

“We both agreed she would,” Kie retorted while wacking John B in the arm.  

“Did I miss it,” Pope asked out of breath. 

[commentaryvorg]

Digimon Data Squad Dub Comparison Episode 3 - The Return of Thomas!

This is a companion to my commentary on the original Japanese Digimon Savers! Reading my commentary on the original version of this episode (which you can find here) is recommended before reading this dub comparison.

Original name ~ Dubbed name

Masaru Daimon ~ Marcus Damon

Yoshino Fujieda ~ Yoshino “Yoshi” Fujieda

Tohma H. Norstein ~ Thomas H. Norstein

Sayuri Daimon ~ Sarah Damon

Chika Daimon ~ Kristy Damon

Captain Rentarou Satsuma ~ Commander Richard Sampson

PetitMeramon ~ DemiMeramon

[Since several characters share the same name between the original and the dub, quotes from the dub will always be in italics, while quotes from the original will not, in order to distinguish them.]

In the original, Masaru’s VA is always the one reading out the title card, but the dub mixes it up with different characters depending on the episode. This time, we get Miki and Megumi reading it, complete with fangirl squealing over Thomas. Uh, thanks, dub.

Sarah:  “I think Agumon has been a really good influence!”

Marcus & Agumon: “More, please!”

Sarah: “See, he even says ‘please’ now.”

Agumon giving Marcus a reason to wake up early on a non-school day, that makes sense, but Agumon giving him a reason to be more polite? I dunno.

As you can see, there is no dub equivalent of “Agu-chan”. This is understandable and not the dubbers’ fault since English lends itself a lot less to casual terms of endearment like that, but it is a shame.

Marcus: “You served him first?! What did you do, adopt him while I wasn’t looking?”

Marcus says this like it’s not exactly what she’s literally done, and also like it’s not what he’d want. Don’t you want Agumon to be your new little brother, Marcus?

Sarah: “Keep it up, tough guy, and I’ll give your portion to him, too.”

Her affectionate ribbing calling him “tough guy” is cute.

Sarah: “After all, Agumon is a growing boy.”

A neat little nod to the time Agumon said that about himself in episode 1 (even if it didn’t make sense for him to have known that human phrase, but).

Agumon:  “I won’t hand over the last of Sayuri’s fried eggs, not even to you!”

~~~~~

Agumon: “Boss, the only way to get this last fried egg is to take it out of my belly.”

Alas, since dub-Agumon is only referring to this particular last fried egg, we lose the future relevance the original line will have. The dub is not watching ahead to be able to pick up on these things.

Chika:  “What a child…”

~~~~~

Kristy: “What a doof.”

Similar snark – he definitely is a doof – but there’s something I like about Chika calling her older brother a “child” that isn’t quite there when all she’s calling him is a doof.

Most of Thomas’s shower scene is cut. I will grant the dub that one improvement it consistently makes is doing its best to remove all the unnecessary fanservice bits.

[as Agumon tumbles from the bike basket]

Kristy:  “…Doof Two.”

Agumon: [sighing] “I guess…”

What do you mean, Agumon admits and agrees that he is a doof (and implicitly agrees that his boss is one as well). Original-Agumon would not have nearly enough self-awareness to acknowledge that.

Marcus: “Why can’t you travel in the Digivice like all the other Digimon?”

Agumon: “Those other Digimon just show up when they’re called, but you’re lucky. You have me all the time, Boss!”

Unlike in the original, Marcus does actually bring up how Agumon ought to be in the Digivice. But Agumon doesn’t protest with “but I don’t like it in there”, despite him having made even more of a point of not liking cramped spaces in the previous dub episode than he did in the original. If the dub was going to have them discuss this onscreen, it would have been better to take the claustrophobia angle and show Marcus respecting Agumon’s wishes than to make it seem like Agumon’s just being contrary for the heck of it.

Marcus: “This one? No? Oh, just press everything!”

I enjoy the dub being even more obvious about how Marcus figures out which button on his earpiece is the right one to press.

Street punk #2: “Nothing’s going on at all…”

PetitMeramon: “Nothing at all!”

~~~~~

Street punk #2: “Nothing ever goes on around here any more…”

DemiMeramon:  “I agree!”

This is significantly different – here, the DemiMeramon isn’t just parroting the dude’s words, it’s definitely expressing its own opinion about things. The implication here is therefore that it starts setting things on fire because of its own boredom, and these dudes here who happen to also be bored have nothing to do with it. That is categorically not how this is supposed to work.

Masaru:  “Let’s fight!”

PetitMeramon: “Fight…”

~~~~~

Marcus: “There it is! Fightin’ time again!”

DemiMeramon:  “Oh yeah?!”

Again, it’s not parroting his words; it’s responding on its own terms like it’s lucid and thinking for itself. Not how this should work.

Masaru:  “You’re not solid enough, damn it! If I could just hit you once, I could get Agumon to evolve!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “It’s not solid enough to land a blow! But I’ve gotta punch it to start the DNA Charge! Otherwise, Agumon can’t Digivolve!”

The original version of this line sounds reasonably naturally like Masaru is just expressing his frustration at the PetitMeramon. But in the dub, it reads a lot more like awkwardly stilted exposition just to make sure the audience understands why this is a problem.

Marcus:  “Stop setting things on fire! I just got these shoes!”

This is one of those dub additions for comedy, but I’m not sure I like the resulting impression that Marcus is somebody who cares that much about what he wears, because Masaru definitely never seems to be that kind of person.

Agumon: “Now be a nice fireball and let us punch you!”

Pfft. This episode in a nutshell. More of that dub-Agumon trait of saying things that would be snarky if it didn’t sound like he obliviously means them completely seriously.

Gaomon:  “Yes, Master!”

~~~~~

Gaomon: “Sir, yes sir!”

“Yes, Master!” (spoken in English) is Gaomon’s catchphrase in the Japanese, and… I have no idea why the dub couldn’t just keep it exactly as-is. “Master” is a perfectly reasonable thing for him to call Tohma (especially since he’s a dog!), and it even comes already translated.

Instead, he calls Thomas “sir”, which on its own is… fine, I guess. But in particular, the “sir, yes sir!” catchphrase just makes dub-Gaomon come across as some kind of army grunt, rather than as the very good and loyal dog that he is.

Masaru:  “Damn it… That thing pissed me off…”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Urghh… I am exhausted. Whew!”

Masaru here is complaining that he didn’t win, but Marcus is basically just neutrally expressing being exhausted without any sense that he’s specifically frustrated at the DemiMeramon for getting away from him. Since the entire ensuing several scenes are supposed to be a lot about Masaru’s frustration that he’s not good enough, the dub is not starting this off on the right note.

Yoshino:  “Well, I didn’t think it would go easily for you from the start.”

~~~~~

Yoshi: “Don’t worry, Marcus, you didn’t let us down! No-one here at DATS actually thought you could do it anyway!”

Yikes, that’s some way more backhanded reassurance than she gave originally. And also, why does she even feels she needs to “reassure” him? Marcus was not expressing any sort of notion that he felt like he’d failed in the first place.

Agumon:  “Hi there, pal.”

[Gaomon ignores Agumon and walks past him]

Agumon: “Hmph! No birthday present for that guy!”

How does Agumon even know about birthdays, and birthday presents, and the concept of giving birthday presents to people you’re on friendly terms with? These are not things he should reasonably have learned about yet when he’s only been with humans for like a week.

Masaru:  “You bastard! You took away my prey!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Hey, you! When we talk, you listen!”

It makes perfectly reasonable Masaru-ish sense for him to be mad about Tohma winning what was supposed to be his fight. But Marcus? Isn’t even thinking about the fight, apparently, and is instead just being a jerk.

So far, all Thomas and Gaomon have ignored is Agumon’s greeting and a brief “who are you, blondie?” from Marcus (the “blondie” part is dub-only, unsurprisingly), which is a little rude but not really warranting this response already. Heck, “when we talk, you listen” implies Thomas has been ignoring something substantial that Marcus has been trying to say to him, rather than just a question and a greeting.

There’s a record scratch in the BGM as Thomas ignores Marcus’s attempt to challenge him to a fight and just walks past him. I liked the comedic record scratch they had in episode 1, but this one feels a little cheesy and unnecessary.

Megumi:  “His stern-looking profile is so wonderful!”

Miki:  “It really is!”

~~~~~

Megumi: “He’s so on top of things!”

Miki:  “He so is!”

I appreciate the dub changing the topic of Megumi and Miki’s fawning into admiring Thomas’s work ethic, rather than the original admiring of his appearance. (He is fourteen, you are adults, please stop.)

Tohma:  “…it seems rather peculiar that there are a large number of Digimon detected in this country lately.”

…

Satsuma:  “Is the frequency not as high in EU?”

Tohma:  “No. It must be because it has a larger area.”

~~~~~

Thomas:  “It seems there have been an unusually large number of Digimon appearances lately.”

…

Sampson: “Hmm. So do you think these numbers could eventually overwhelm the Data Squad?”

Thomas: “No. But of course, that all depends on having the right team in place.”

Seems the dub is ditching the fact that it’s specifically this country that’s been getting so many more Digimon appearances. Instead, Thomas just takes the opportunity to be a passive-aggressive jerk about Marcus sooner than in the original.

Satsuma:  “Oh, let me introduce you. This is…”

[Tohma barely even glances at Masaru; Masaru gets angry]

Masaru:  “Hey! I don’t care if you’re called Tohma or Tonma… but around here, I’m your senpai! I’ve only been here for three days, but make sure to call me ‘Daimon-san’ or ‘Daimon-senpai’!”

~~~~~

Sampson: “Oh. Go ahead and introduce yourself, Marcus.”

[Thomas barely even glances at Marcus. Marcus gets angry]

Marcus: “Say what?! Why doesn’t *he* introduce himself to *me*?! I’m the one with seniority, even if it’s only three days.”

This reads a lot less like Marcus getting angry has anything to do with the way Thomas just barely even looked at him, and more that he’s mad at Sampson for thinking he ought to introduce himself first. In that vein, it’s somewhat more reasonable for him to go ranting about seniority, I suppose. However, I liked the way that Masaru suddenly ranting about that with no real provocation was unreasonable and was very transparently him trying to assert some kind of superiority, not really about the appropriate-honorific-respect that he tried to insist was the point.

Marcus: “Who does he think he is, anyway? Look, kid! Agumon and I are the top fighters around here, and don’t you forget it!”

Meanwhile in the dub, the lines specifically asking for honorifics have no English equivalent, so we get this to fill the gap. I guess it has a reasonably similar effect and is a similarly uncalled-for assertion of superiority.

(I do like the “kid”, trying to make Thomas seem beneath him despite their equal age.)

Satsuma:  “Already blazing down the warpath, eh?”

~~~~~

Sampson: “You are completely out of line.”

Satsuma was being reasonably tolerant of Masaru’s argumentative nature, accepting that this is just how Masaru is and he’ll hopefully be able to rein it in if he just understands the situation better. But Sampson is simply having none of it.

Sampson: “Marcus, Thomas is *your* superior. Deal.”

I guess it’s a lip-flap issue, but Sampson just telling Marcus to “deal” sounds weirdly colloquial for him. Also, “superior” is not quite the same thing as having seniority in terms of just having more experience. This implies that Thomas is going to have the right to give Marcus orders and Marcus will be obligated to follow them, which is not quite it.

Marcus: “You mean I have to take orders from him?”

…Okay, apparently that literally is what the dub wants us to think, even though this is not how things are actually going to work here.

(This is in place of the line establishing that Masaru and Tohma are the same age, but that will be a fact that gets mentioned in a later dub episode.)

Satsuma:  “Be sure to get along with each other, as you are colleagues.”

~~~~~

Sampson: “Unlike some teams, *they* have got discipline.”

Satsuma was trying to mediate between the two, but instead Sampson is very clearly taking Thomas’s side, which he really ought to know is only going to rile Marcus up more.

(If Marcus and Agumon’s lack of discipline is really such a big dealbreaker for you, Sampson, why did you even want to recruit him in the first place?)

Tohma:  “I think it will be futile to do so, Captain Satsuma. There is not a chance that this person could benefit DATS.”

~~~~~

Thomas: “Commander, please allow me to say a few words about the new recruit. Based on my first impression, I feel he could never benefit DATS in any way.”

Thomas is being a lot less out of line here, asking politely to speak his opinion and qualifying it as being only based on a first impression. This is also not him pointedly refusing to even try and get along like Tohma was, since Sampson didn’t ask him to. The blame in the dub version of this argument is a lot more heaped onto Marcus’s side rather than equally with both of them, and Sampson obviously siding with Thomas doesn’t help matters.

Masaru:  “Say that to my face! Look into a person’s eyes when they’re talking!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Say that to my face! Look me in the eye! If you have the guts!”

There’s slightly less emphasis on Marcus caring about people looking him in the eye when they’re talking to him, since he turns it into a general jab about Thomas not having any guts, but I do appreciate that it’s pretty much still here and unchanged.

Marcus: “What fighting skills does Your Highness possess, you royal jerk?!”

Ehh, I don’t really like Marcus bringing in jabs about the nobility thing at this point. Thomas has just insulted his fighting strength, and in that particular fighting context, Masaru would not care about anything except his opponent’s strength and would not make uncalled-for jabs at something unrelated.

Yoshino:  “This is the worst… Go ahead, do whatever you want.”

~~~~~

Yoshi:  “Oh well… Good luck. Protect yourself.”

This is after Marcus refuses to put on his headgear in the boxing ring. Yoshino sounds like she’s just exasperatedly washing her hands of his self-destructive recklessness, because hey, at least she tried. But Yoshi still seems to be genuinely trying to help him, even as the “protect yourself” falls kinda flat because he literally just refused to do so. (It doesn’t sound especially sarcastic – the “good luck” at least sounds very genuine.)

Tohma:  “Why did you join DATS?”

Masaru:  “Huh?! It was so I could win, obviously!”

Tohma:  “Against who?”

Masaru:  “Against strong guys!”

~~~~~

Thomas: “What made you join DATS in the first place?”

Marcus: “Huh? It was so I could meet guys like *you*!”

Thomas: “Seriously?”

Yoshi:  “He means, he wanted to fight. Strong guys, like you.”

Marcus: “Not him…”

I think what the dub is trying to get at with “guys like you” is similar to a change they made last episode, in which Marcus apparently specifically wants to beat up bad guys, and Thomas is totally one of those, right. I guess props to the dub for at least trying to keep that vaguely consistent? Even though it’s a change that I very much do not like.

I presume the “not him” after Yoshi just said “strong guys like [Thomas]” is Marcus wanting to insist that Thomas isn’t strong, because it otherwise wouldn’t make any sense for him to deny the thing that he literally just said himself.

But, hey, notice something else here? Yoshino doesn’t have a line here in the original. They edited the footage to take away Marcus explaining his own goals and put those words into Yoshi’s mouth instead. Why? Why would you do that. I’d say that maybe they only did so to remove some of the punching from the fight because oh no violence (there will be some Issues the dub has with removing punching from this anime which is very heavily about punching), except they still keep the bit where Thomas punches Marcus in the stomach, so that can’t be it. They actually keep all the punches in this fight uncut, which is Rare for the dub.

Tohma:  (He’s beyond help.)

~~~~~

Thomas: (I’m getting tired of this.)

Thomas’s thought is a lot less unreasonable than Tohma’s. Thomas is still coming across as significantly more in the right than Marcus in the dub, rather than them being equally as bad as each other.

Masaru:  “A fight doesn’t end until one side admits defeat!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Sorry ‘bout that. Why don’t you run along and catch up with Sampson. Maybe you can read a report together.”

Ughhh, I really, really don’t like this. The dub has apparently decided that, since Marcus is A Jock™, he must be disdainful of Nerds™ like Thomas and make jabs about that. Masaru doesn’t frigging care! He does not give a damn in the slightest how book-smart and workaholic Tohma is; the only thing that would ever matter to Masaru is how he fares in a fight.

And we get this instead of that fun line showing Masaru’s philosophy about street fights, giving more insight into why he insisted on getting up and continuing the fight even after the “match” had ended.

I also don’t like Marcus’s “apology”. He is very obviously not sorry for deliberately punching Thomas, and trying to act like he is when he obviously isn’t is such an insincere dick thing to do that would never even cross Masaru’s mind.

Yoshino:  “Tohma’s beaten Olympic champions in the past.”

~~~~~

Yoshi: “I’ve seen Thomas routinely beat Olympic champions in that very ring!”

…What, in that ring in the gym that’s presumably at DATS? Even if this is the dub assuming it’s not at DATS and is just some gym somewhere nearby in town, you’d have thought that if Tohma had fought champions, he’d have gone to them to do so, rather than inviting them to him. To them, he’s just some random rich kid; why would they go that far out of their way for him?

The “routinely” also serves to make Thomas’s talent sound even more ridiculously over-the-top than it already was.

Yoshino:  “Really, the only things worthy of a gold medal around here are your pride and your competitive attitude.”

~~~~~

Yoshi: “Marcus, I’m not impressed by your bragging, and Thomas isn’t even in the room!”

I miss the snark. A lot of characters the dub makes snarkier, but Yoshi kinda becomes a bit less so, it seems.

Kudamon:  “If even a small flame from PetitMeramon’s body remains, it has the ability to develop and multiply in a short time. It should have been prevented from doing so earlier.”

~~~~~

Kudamon:  “A DemiMeramon can regenerate itself over and over again, multiplying a hundred times in as little as half an hour. Apparently, the area wasn’t sealed off earlier.”

The dub manages to completely leave out the part where this is Masaru’s fault because embers from the PetitMeramon were scattered everywhere from his failed attempts to punch it and then he ran off and left things on fire for new PetitMeramon to regenerate themselves from.

Instead, apparently DemiMeramon can just multiply… whenever? It doesn’t do so from the flames it leaves behind, it just copies itself? Except, if Thomas secured the single DemiMeramon that there was to begin with, it literally should not have been able to do so. Sealing off the area would have been irrelevant once it had been safely turned into an egg. The only way it could have multiplied itself like this is if it did so before Thomas neutralised it – but it clearly didn’t do that in front of Marcus, so this is hardly his fault.

Marcus has the same flashback to punching the DemiMeramon and the same thought that this is his fault, but this makes absolutely no sense with the information the dub has given us. Great job there, dubbers.

Sampson: “And now, the DemiMeramon has been left on its own to multiply at will!”

Um, dub? Do you not remember the part where Thomas brought in the DemiMeramon’s egg? It was not left anywhere. That is not how this happened and not why this is (supposed to be) Marcus’s fault.

Masaru:  “Wait! Those fireballs are ours to beat!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “Hey! Hold on a second, that’s our case!”

They really are watering down any sense that Marcus sees this as being about finishing his fight. Instead he’s apparently invested because this is a case, like he ever really cared about the official DATS investigation side of things.

Masaru:  “Damn right! We’ll pull it off somehow using our spirits!”

~~~~~

Marcus: “You bet! And we’ll do it with style, too!”

I miss the “somehow”, making it clear that Masaru has absolutely no idea how he’s going to do this and is willing to basically admit that, yet still wants to throw himself into it anyway.

Marcus: “You two can’t handle that many alone! We’ll help!”

The “we’ll help” is a dub addition, but I am surprised by the notion that Marcus sounds willing to just help Thomas, essentially working together with him. That definitely shouldn’t be something he’d want to do right now. (Suddenly the dub is making Marcus come across as more reasonable and less of a jerk than it’s been doing the entire time, because what is consistency.)

Megumi:  “His lightning-fast techniques look great!”

~~~~~

Megumi: “His reflexes are lightning fast! And he’s cute!”

Okay, never mind what I said earlier, I guess the dub is still keeping the idea that the computer ladies think Thomas is cute, adding in a reference to that where there wasn’t even one originally.

Agumon:  “Wow…”

~~~~~

Agumon: “Cute?”

And because of that, we also lose Agumon being in awe of Tohma and Gaomon’s performance and accidentally making Masaru feel worse, in place of him simply irrelevantly questioning Megumi’s comment.

Kudamon:  “Aren’t you going to stop him?”

Satsuma:  “Leave him alone.”

~~~~~

Kudamon: “You’re not going to say anything?”

Sampson: “Not yet.”

So apparently, Sampson is planning to give Marcus some kind of talking-to about this at some point probably fairly soon. We’re really losing that sense from Satsuma that he understands that Masaru will be Masaru and is being patient and giving him space to sort his issues with Tohma out on his own, which I enjoyed and am sad to lose.

Agumon:  “Aniki… Why are you angry?”

~~~~~

Agumon: “Don’t be upset, Boss! Just because Thomas is better than you!”

Originally Agumon didn’t really understand what was going on in Masaru’s head. Meanwhile, dub-Agumon seems to have Marcus figured out perfectly – and yet is also tactless enough to outright say the thing he’s already realised is upsetting him.

Agumon:  “Well, I think Tohma and Gaomon are nasty guys too, but…”

~~~~~

Agumon: “Boss, I’m sorry I said that about Thomas. You’re better than him.”

At least dub-Agumon realises this and apologises after Marcus is clearly not thrilled by it, but his “you’re better than him” reads as pretty empty reassurance when he just said the exact opposite.

(Meanwhile, original-Agumon still didn’t realise this had anything to do with who’s better than who and just thought it had to be about Tohma being kind of a dick, while still being confused at how that would make Aniki this upset…?)

Masaru:  “No… It’s myself that I’m mad at, not them.”

~~~~~

Marcus: “No, I’m not. I’m just pig-headed and I let my pride get in my way.”

Marcus, like Masaru, is capable of realising that the problem is himself here… but he goes way further than Masaru does as to why that supposedly is.

And the thing is, this isn’t actually supposed to be the problem in the original! Originally, Masaru’s issue was that Tohma is “better” than him simply in the sense that he’s a stronger and more capable fighter, making Masaru face the fact that he might not be as strong a fighter as he thought he was. But here in the dub, apparently the problem is that Thomas is “better” than Marcus because of Marcus’s personality, because Thomas is supposedly just a better person than some pig-headed arrogant jerk like Marcus.

Which is not the point! Masaru can be reckless and prideful sometimes, but it’s never in a way that makes him a bad fighter or a bad person. He’s been a bit of argumentative jerk in this episode in particular with regards to Tohma, but Tohma himself has been equally bad in that regard in his own very different way. The original was great in having both Masaru and Tohma be equally the problem in this clash between them, in very parallel ways.

Yet apparently the dub wants us to think that, no, Thomas is a perfectly reasonable guy and the problem really is that Marcus is such an arrogant jerk compared to him. Which I guess is somewhat consistent with some of the small changes they’ve been making to the rest of the episode to make Marcus slightly more of a jerk and Thomas slightly less of one, and having Sampson clearly come down on Thomas’s side, to make it look like Marcus’s attitude alone is the problem.

But, urgh! I hate that the dub is doing this to Masaru’s character, presenting Marcus as more of a jerk and as if this is his biggest character flaw, when that has nothing to do with what’s going on with Masaru and just makes Marcus significantly less likeable! Why would you ever think this was a good thing to do with the story’s main protagonist, seriously.

Masaru:  “Damn it! What am I doing? Really… what the hell am I doing?”

~~~~~

Marcus: “It’s time I realised it. I still have a lot to learn. Face it. I’m not the ultimate fighter.”

And now, while originally Masaru was unable to properly articulate what it actually was that was frustrating him about himself, Marcus has just fully completed this 100% self-aware reflection. From this, what you’d assume it’d lead into would be, presumably, Marcus trying to be less “pig-headed and prideful” and more like Thomas, since apparently Thomas’s way of doing things obviously makes him better than Marcus as both a fighter and a person?

Yeah, raincheck on that supposed character development. I’m sure you can already tell that’s not what’s going to happen here, since it isn’t in the original, because it doesn’t freaking need to be.

Also, remember how I made a point of how the original changed Masaru’s “already the number one street fighter” into Marcus’s “trying to be the ultimate fighter” in episode 1? That’s becoming extremely relevant right here.

This whole episode is a bit of a wake-up call for Masaru in terms of realising for the first time that maybe he’s not actually the greatest fighter like he thought and there’s still more growing he can do. But Marcus? He’s supposed to have already known that. “Face it, I’m not the ultimate fighter”? You literally never said you were in the first place. You were supposed to already know you had a lot to learn, so why is it only just now “time I realised it”?

There wouldn’t necessarily be anything inherently wrong with the dubbers changing Marcus’s ultimate fighter thing into this if they’d made sure to follow through on it and also change every character moment he gets to be consistent with the new version. Buuut they’re not doing that. I don’t think they realised how meaningful of a change it even was to make in the first place.

Old man:  “It’s hard lighting up a fire… The sparks go out easily whenever the wind gets a little too strong.”

Masaru:  “Well, obviously!”

~~~~~

Old man: “I’m having trouble starting a fire, though. Y’see, the flames keep dying out on me because the wind’s too strong and it keeps blowing it out.”

Marcus: “Yeah, that’s happened to me, too.”

Unlike Masaru, who was just expressing exasperation at this old guy telling him something obvious like he didn’t already know that the wind blows out flames, Marcus appears to be… getting the metaphor? His own experience that he’s referring to could just be his literal problem of not being able to punch fire, but based on what he’s just been reflecting on a moment ago and also judging from his tone of voice, that doesn’t seem to be it.

Which makes me sad! Masaru is a ridiculously straightforward doofus who wouldn’t know a metaphor if it punched him in the face, and I am disappointed to see the dub water down that delightful part of his character and make Marcus into some kind of regular person who can actually recognise that kind of thing.

Old man:  “But… once I get a larger flame going, it burns strongly no matter how much the wind blows. Fire is an interesting thing, isn’t it?”

Masaru:  “…This is…”

~~~~~

Old man: “Well… If you learn to use the wind instead of fighting it, you can make the fire burn brighter than ever before. Harness power, don’t extinguish it.”

Marcus: “…He’s right!”

But then, the dub’s version of the metaphor becomes something quite different. Instead of saying that Masaru’s “flame” will soon get so strong that no wind can blow it out, he’s saying that Marcus should harness the “wind” to make his “flame” stronger.

Originally, the metaphor was basically meant to be a reassurance to Masaru that he’s already doing fine – that he just needs to keep going as he has been and continue to grow and soon enough nothing will be able to stop him. But here in the dub, the metaphor appears to be prompting him to take new action of some sort, warning him that his flame will keep getting blown out if he doesn’t do whatever “harnessing the wind” is supposed to mean.

It’s ambiguous exactly what the “wind” could represent here. If it’s something that was getting in Marcus’s way until now, is it meant to be his “pig-headed pride” that he was just thinking was his big problem? Is the point of this supposed to be the old man telling Marcus through metaphor that actually he should keep being exactly the way he is and should just do that harder?

On the one hand I’d be okay with that because hey, guess what, newsflash, there is actually nothing wrong with Masaru being the way he is, and the dub is wrong to try and act like his personality is the issue and to distort his personality into being more of a jerk to make it an issue. But then that just serves to completely undermine the supposed realisation that Marcus had back in the tunnel and set him back on the track of not trying to change at all. (Which, yeah, again, spoilers, he’s not going to; of course he’s not going to be actively trying to make himself more like Thomas, because that’s not something that Masaru would ever do. Masaru has very strong convictions in who he is and wouldn’t change that for anyone.)

And somehow, despite this metaphor being a lot more metaphorical and ambiguous than it was in the original, and despite this being Marcus, he appears to completely understand what the old man is trying to say to him and take those words to heart. Whatever those words actually are. Somehow.

…I suppose it’s possible that actually the “wind” in the metaphor is supposed to represent Thomas, and that this metaphor is trying to encourage Marcus and Thomas to work together to make each other stronger. This would sort of make sense, since GeoGreymon uses fire-based attacks while Gaogamon uses wind-based attacks, and we’ll actually be seeing some metaphorical stuff being done with those attacks of theirs in the next couple of episodes. Still, if that’s the case, it’s nonetheless definitely not what Marcus gets from this metaphor right here.

But you know what else this dub version of the metaphor very much isn’t? It is not remotely useful literal advice about how to punch fire. At no point does it explain the part where a stronger flame won’t be blown out by anything (and will therefore be punchable). So whatever Marcus is getting from the old man’s words here, it isn’t that. This is kind of important for what’s about to happen next.

As Marcus hears about the trouble at the gas tanks and rushes off, the old man has an added line that’s just silence in the original:

Old man: “See what good fire does?”

…which makes even more of a point that this is definitely only meant to be some kind of metaphor. Though, wasn’t he trying to say that the wind would do Marcus good? Marcus already is the fire in this metaphor, so stressing that fire is good seems besides the point. I’m getting increasingly convinced that the dubbers just didn’t have an actual meaning in mind for their version of the metaphor at all and were half-assing this entire conversation. (Yet they somehow still felt they knew better than the original writers enough to change it at all.)

Thomas: “There’s no chance he can secure the DemiMeramon. There’s too many!”

[cut to precisely *three* DemiMeramon flying around]

Yep, sure, three of them is totally too many. Originally the “too many” comment wasn’t there, and Tohma thought Masaru couldn’t do this simply because he hadn’t shown he could handle any PetitMeramon at all. Numbers are not supposed to be the issue here, or at least not the primary one like Thomas is making it sound like it is.

Masaru:  “Fire sparks easily go out whenever the wind blows on them. But… Once they burst into flame…!”

[Masaru leaps to punch the Meramon quite solidly in the face and lands with his Digisoul flaring]

Masaru:  “They won’t be extinguished so easily!”

~~~~~

Marcus:  “Just like the old man said, a fire can be blown out by the wind. Then again… you know what I always say…!”

[Marcus leaps to punch the Meramon quite solidly in the face and lands with his DNA flaring]

Marcus:  “You gotta fight fire with fire!”

So… yeah. In the dub, the old man’s words were not actually advice on how to solve this problem, and Marcus’s decision to deliberately make the DemiMeramon stronger had nothing to do with what the old man told him. He had no reason to believe this would work. He really was just being dangerously rash and hot-headed with no sense of actual plan or strategy, and it really did only work out of sheer luck.

(I mean, okay, maybe he could have just figured on his own that making the fire stronger would make it punchable. But Masaru is definitely not supposed to be the kind of person who could figure that out without being nudged in the right direction by someone else. And if Marcus really is perfectly capable of figuring that out on his own, why did he not do so the first time?)

Thomas: “Marcus made Meramon Digivolve on purpose so he could activate his DNA…”

It is very debatable that this was on purpose here, Thomas.

Megumi:  “Not bad!”

~~~~~

Megumi: “Marcus proved he could do it!”

Thanks, dub, we needed it made obvious that this fight was about Marcus proving himself, because we couldn’t figure that out on our own.

Thomas: “Don’t get cocky. You just got lucky this time, that’s all.”

This line is basically unchanged, but guess what? Thomas is right to say this, where Tohma wasn’t.

Tohma:  “Don’t be absurd. You don’t come up with any strategy or tactics. Do you think using force all the time will let you win at everything?”

Masaru:  “Hah, sounds like a sore loser to me.”

~~~~~

Thomas: “Just as I thought, you had no plan and no tactics, just raw power.”

Marcus: “Hah. For a genius, you’re a real sore loser.”

Still basically the same, but again, Thomas is right this time, not being a sore loser. In fact, the added “just as I thought” (and this line comes after the cut back to HQ, so there was conversation prior to it that we didn’t hear) suggests that Thomas has just heard from Marcus himself that, yes, he really did just recklessly charge in with no plan.

I mean, sure, in a sense Thomas is still being a sore loser because Marcus’s raw power still worked. But the point of the sore loser line in the original was that Tohma insisting that Masaru used no tactics in and of itself was him sorely refusing to admit that maybe Masaru actually did have some idea what he was doing after all.

Tohma:  “What did you say?”

Masaru:  “Wanna make somethin’ of it? I’ll knock you out with one hit to the face this time!”

~~~~~

Thomas: “What did you say?”

Marcus: “Oh, just this: I’ll take my raw power over your tactics any day!”

Granted, outright saying he’d prefer raw power over tactics is definitely something Masaru might also say (of course he would; look at how he never tried to point out that he actually did have a strategy because he doesn’t care about that). But this is a bit of a different way for the dub to show Marcus having his confidence back, since his “conflict” this episode was apparently about “oh no what if raw power is bad and I should be more like Thomas”.

(…Did the dub actually deliberately remove the part where the metaphor was literal advice about punching fire so that Marcus could win through nothing but raw power in order to facilitate this complete backpedal in what briefly appeared to be some ill-advised character development? Ugh, but even if that was on purpose, it’s so much more interesting to show that Masaru actually can do strategy sometimes, and it’s just that his strategies are a lot more risky and head-on than Tohma’s!)

Tohma:  “You want me… to act alongside him?”

Masaru:  “You’re joking! I’ll never accept him as my partner!”

~~~~~

Thomas: “But sir, he’s completely undisciplined!”

Marcus: “This clown?! I’ll never be his partner – he’s way too annoying!”

Thomas and Marcus get given specific reasons to object to working together in the dub – and while Thomas’s complaint of “undisciplined” is perfectly reasonable, Marcus’s complaint of “annoying” seems rather beside the point. Too pompous, too uptight, (too makes-him-feel-like-maybe-strategy-and-not-just-raw-power-might-be-useful); something like that would be more relevant to Marcus. Is this supposed to be another Marcus Just Hates Nerds™ thing? Because ugh.

Overall differences

Oh boy. There’s a lot going on in terms of changes in this episode, and basically all of it is bad.

Rather than Masaru and Tohma both being presented as equally out-of-line for their own reasons in their initial arguments, the narrative firmly comes down on Thomas’s side by making Thomas less unreasonably harsh in his comments and by having Sampson clearly taking Thomas’s side.

The bit where they explain how DemiMeramon multiplied makes no sense and certainly doesn’t logically leave it as being Marcus’s fault at all, yet he still claims it is for no reason and we’re just expected to believe that.

Then there’s Marcus’s whole, ahem, “character arc” for the episode, if it can even be called that. Rather than some delightful subtle exploration of how Masaru deals with the realisation that he’s not necessarily the strongest fighter out there like he professes to be, it becomes this heavy-handed thing about how Marcus’s whole problem is that he’s Such A Big Arrogant Jerk. Marcus is way more self-aware about his supposed exact problem than someone like him really ought to be (including admitting he’s not the ultimate fighter when he never said he was), and for a moment it seems like his character development is going to be about him learning to be less of a jerk and more like Thomas. Except it won’t, because this won’t happen in the original, because this is not remotely Masaru’s problem in the original.

Then there’s the old man’s metaphor. Originally he was effectively saying that Masaru is doing fine the way he is and just needs to keep growing and getting stronger like this. Here, the metaphor is changed to imply that Marcus needs to take some kind of new action, except what new action is extremely unclear and is not actually going to happen, because, again, not how it went originally. Marcus apparently somehow gets this metaphor, which is ridiculous because I’m not even sure what it was on about, never mind that Marcus should be the last person who’s any good with metaphors, just like Masaru is.

And then there’s the part where the old man’s changed metaphor had nothing to do with teaching Marcus how he could literally punch fire and defeat the DemiMeramon. So his victory in the climactic fight really was complete boneheaded reckless luck without a semblance of strategy, and Thomas was right to call it that.

This entire dub version of the episode firmly wants you to come down on Thomas’s side and agree that Marcus is a huge dumb arrogant jerk whose personality is the entire problem here, and, urgh. I hate it. I hate it so much. I hate that the dub writers consciously chose to do this to Masaru’s character. Masaru does not deserve this.

(You’re probably starting to see why I’m actually quite glad that Masaru has a different name in the dub. Marcus may be a somewhat different character that the dub is insistently making worse, but at least Masaru will always be untainted and separate from the dub’s nonsense.)

[jpegjade]

En Pointe! - Spencer

i’m excited to announce that i actually finished another fic in order of when i meant to write the next set of fics! i finally got inspiration to finish this one that i’ve had drafted for a little while. 

Request: You are a ballerina who lands a huge role and your boyfriend, Spencer, and the team are there to support you. 

warnings? none. just fluff

____________________

“Guess what! I have something so, so, sooo special for you.” You said, squealing. 

“You can’t be pregnant, can you? Well I guess you can be if it isn’t mine but I highly doubt you’re having a kid with someone else because you’re always working.” He said, lightly. 

“I’m pregnant with Prentiss’ baby.” You chuckled. 

“I knew it.” Spencer said.  “I always thought there was something up with you two.” You could hear his smile over the phone.

“No, you doof. I got the lead! I’m Cinderella!” You yelled in your car. It came out more like a squeal but you knew Spencer knew what you were saying because he had been just as nervous as you after your second set of auditions. 

“Oh my god, I’m so proud of you! I wish I was there with you so I could pick you up and spin you around.” Spencer’s smile sounded bigger. 

“I hate this.” You pouted. Spencer knew you were pouting and could clearly remember your pouty face. 

“I’m sorry, baby. I wish I could be there but this case doesn’t seem like it’s wrapping up any time soon.” Spencer said into the phone. You could hear the sounds of police chatter in the background. 

You were the company’s lead ballerina now. You worked years to earn the position, even before you knew you wanted it. Your dream had always been to be Cinderella in the Cinderella Ballet and you finally worked your way up the ranks to be at the top. Thousands of hours of hard work finally paid off for you and the only thing you wanted to do was celebrate it with your boyfriend. Unfortunately he was halfway across the country. 

“We open on Friday. Do you think that it will be done by then?” You asked, looking for your sunglasses in the car. You always ended up misplacing them. 

It was a bright and sunny day for once to match your mood as you left for lunch. You didn’t have much time since you needed to get your Cinderella leotards fitted so they could make adjustments. You were just going to grab something light. 

“I don’t know, love. I can’t tell. Hopefully but I can’t be sure. You know how these things work…” Spencer trailed off. 

“I know, I know.” You sighed. 

“If we can’t make it back in time, I’ll send you a present. I promise.” Spencer said, hurriedly. 

“Okay, well… I love you.” You said, knowing that he was about to go back to the case. 

“I love you too, y/n. I’ll see you soon, okay?” Spencer said as the two of you signed off. 

The next few days went by in a blur. It was stressful, getting ready to open, but you knew all of the choreography by heart and by the time the grueling practices came to an end and it was time for the real thing, you were excited but still bummed. 

You loved Spencer, you did. But the one thing you hated so much was your conflicting schedules. It had been a topic of conversation before, when the two of you fought about it once, but it had been dropped after working through the real issue: you missed him and he missed you and that kept you together when the nights got cold and the days felt long. 

“Opening night…” You said, finishing your make-up touches. 

“I’m FBI. I can go back here if I please.” You heard someone trying to convince the security guard to move aside. You recognized that voice before. 

“Penelope?” You called, getting up from your seat in front of the mirror. 

“Hi! Your boyfriend sent me!” She smiled, covered in fairytale memorabilia. Everything on her shimmered and sparkled, even her glasses. 

“You’re my present?” You asked, slightly deflated. 

You loved everyone on Spencer’s team but you meshed with certain people better than others. You liked Emily. You loved JJ. You blended with Morgan. You got Hotch to smile once and you never let him live it down whenever Spencer had you around the team, when time allowed. Penelope was a different story. You loved her in theory but you would’ve taken Hotch over her any day just because Penelope was lovely, she just was a lot to handle at once. 

“No! But I come bearing gifts!” She said, pushing past the security guard. She was holding a small box in her hand. There was a tag with Spencer’s name in his weird handwriting on the top. 

Taking the box from Garcia and pulling her close to you, you realized that you didn’t need Spencer there on opening night to know that he was with you. He sent someone he cared about in his place. He sent you a present, something just between the two of you. He even got up super early, despite the time difference, and left you a voicemail while you were sleeping so you could hear his voice. He knew you got nervous before performances so he always left you something special. 

“Thank you, Penelope.” You told her as the security guard dragged her away, telling her to go find her seat or she wouldn’t find her way into the performance at all. 

You opened the box and found a heart locket. A gorgeous, gold heart locket. You pulled it open to find a picture of you and Spencer on one side and a picture of you dancing on the other side. You hadn’t seen this second picture before so you assumed that it was a photo Spencer took of you when you weren’t paying attention. He did that often when you allowed him to come into the studio with you on your days off. He loved to take photos of you dancing. He said you looked so happy, so natural. 

You put the box in your bag backstage and looked at the clock. You had time to listen to his voicemail one more time before the performance before you raced off to your first spot. 

The first act always passes by so quickly but intermission couldn’t get here fast enough. One thing you liked about being Cinderella was you had the choice of walking out with some of the smaller roles and meeting guests in the lobby. You were so used to doing it for the smaller roles you performed for the company that you decided to do it for the first night at least. 

Walking out with security and a handler, you saw the crowd of actual people looking at you in awe. All of these faces, all of them invested in your dancing. You got to meet so many little kids that were so inspired by you. Little girls had Cinderella shirts on and gorgeous dresses you found so beautiful. You were speaking to a young girl who reminded you of yourself when you were younger when her parents took her over to buy a shirt after they saw how happy she was to speak with you.

You glanced over in their direction and out the corner of your eye, you saw a head of brunette hair and a navy blue cardigan, something your boyfriend would wear. Your eyes adjusted past the little girl, only to see it was a false alarm. There was no one there except Penelope, waving at you. You smiled at her, waving back, and glanced around the area. People were starting to fill back into their seats but there was still a reasonable crowd settled outside, talking with the other dancers. You figured it was a good time to stretch before the second half of the ballet so you headed back to the dressing room to check your phone. Spencer had texted you one more time, sending a winky face. There was only one time he sent a winky face, meaning he would see you soon. 

You danced with precision and grace, hitting all of your marks perfectly. Of course, you had to be as perfect as possible for the role but even the pressure didn’t phase you now. You were flying, held up by your partner. You were flying, gliding on the wings of the applause. You were being showered by applause before you knew it, a smile bigger than ever on your face. The lights hindered your ability to see the crowd but you knew that all of these people were clapping for Cinderella, her story, you. 

So why did it feel so… Empty? 

You walked out of the dressing room, dressed in normal comfy clothes, greeted by Garcia with a single blue rose. You smiled and made small talk before you were tapped on the shoulder by someone you didn’t see walk up to you. 

“I believe this is yours.” Hotch said, presenting you with another blue rose. You smiled and hugged him, so excited. 

“I can’t believe you came!” You said, looking between Hotch and Garcia. 

Garcia was smiling but not at you. Around Hotch’s back stood Morgan, JJ, and Prentiss. All three of them holding roses for you. 

“Guys!” You were getting so overwhelmed with emotions that you almost forgot the biggest factor in all of this. 

“Surprise!” Spencer said in a small voice, a big smile on his face and open arms. 

You finally got to run into his arms and let him spin you around. Your smile was just as big as his, tears streaming down your cheeks. 

“Were you here the whole time?” You asked when he put you down. 

“I was! I wanted to surprise you. With the roses, our family, and my heart. Well, the locket but still my heart.” He said, hands still tightly wrapped around you. 

“You were amazing!” JJ said, followed by a chorus of agreement from the rest of the team. Spencer finally let you go when you pulled away to talk to everyone. He opted for holding your hand instead and he never let it go.

“I told them you looked stunning.” Garcia said, excitedly.

“You’re giving babygirl a run for her money.” Derek said, nudging Penelope. 

All of you continued to talk in the lobby until Derek suggested getting dinner. Everyone but you and Spencer decided to go but the two of you promised a rain check on that dinner. You were exhausted and all Spencer wanted to do was spend time with you. 

“You really surprised me.” You said, squeezed his hand in the car. 

“Good. I was hoping Garcia didn’t spoil anything. She’s been known to hold a secret for 13 hours at the most but even then, she’s pushing it.” Spencer chuckled as he drove the two of you home. 

“The picture in the locket. I didn’t recognize it. Where is it from?” You said, running the piece of jewelry between your fingers. 

“It’s the first picture I ever took of you, before we started dating, resized to fit in the locket.” Spencer said. 

“You saved that?” You said, chuckling. You didn’t think he was interested in you back then. 

“I saved it and the very next day, I told everyone about you. How beautiful you were, how you don't walk, you gracefully float places, and of course how delicately you danced.” Spencer said. 

You wanted to continue the conversation but when you tried to talk, you felt the feeling of sleep gripping your body. The two of you got back home to his apartment and as soon as you hit the bed, you fell into a deep, very needed sleep. 

[jadewritings]

Fractured Mind

Pairing: Sam and Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 2.8k+

Warning(s): Angst, Fluff, Sadness, Mental Torture

Author’s Note: This may seemed rushed and i wont lie, it is lol. It’s been sitting in my drafts for a while but I don't wanna waste the idea so... it is what it is. This was forced too. Words forced to be written cause i so badly wanna get back into writing.

Summary: Everything was perfect, you got the guys, the kids, the white picket fence life. You were happy, until you weren’t.

“Mommy! Mommy! Look how high I’m going!” Your six year old son shouted at you from the swing. You smiled and sent a thumbs up his way.

“Make sure you be careful not to go too high, daddy.” You shouted at Dean who only laughed evilly.

You sighed and looked over to your left at Sam, who bounced your 2 year old daughter on his lap, making her giggle. It was contagious, making you both laugh.

“You two really make great fathers.” You told him, kissing his cheek lovingly.

“And you make a wonderful mother.” He smiled at you and pressed his lips to yours while one hand rested on your bump.

“Nah, I’m just a surrogate at this point. Mira and junior don’t even look my way anymore.” Sighing, you picked up your water and drank it.

“Y/N, tell me you don’t really believe that?” He asked.

“Sam, we’ve had two kids, working on our third and god knows how many more. They haven’t clung to me like they do you guys.” Mira blew a raspberry, and slapped her hands on Sam’s cheeks, effectively squishing them. “See?”

“Honey, they love you just as much as they do us. You carried them for nine months, you feed them, love them, hold them. They know you’re their mother.”

Mira turned her big y/e/c eyes toward you and squee’d in baby talk, stretching her arms out for you to hold her. You laughed, and being as hormonal as you can be for being five months pregnant, began to tear up.

You couldn’t help kissing all over her face and listening to her squeal and laugh. “You guys have no idea how much I love you.”

Sam turned your face to his and kissed you. Not just a peck, but a deep, full of love, passionate kiss.

“Whoa now, kids around.” Dean joked as he walked over to the table with junior. “Mommy! Did you see how high daddy pushed me!”

You sniffled and laughed, “You bet your butt I did! You were practically soaring through the sky bud!” Junior sat on your lap and drank his soda from McDonald’s.

Dean sat across from y’all, picking Mira from your lap and playing with her. Your heart swelled with love and pride, having two wonderful partners and two wonderful children. It was like nothing bad in the world could touch you, it was just you guys, happy and healthy.

Dean started to say something but when you looked at his mouth, no sound came out.

“What?” Dean repeated what he said but it sounded almost glitched.

“It’s... almost.. time.”

“Time? Time for what?” You looked over at Sam but it was as if Dean hadn’t said anything, he continued to eat his food.

“Guys, what’s going on?” The world started to lose its color, fading to black.

“No, no, no! Sam! Dean!”

It felt as if you were falling and your family was fading out of existence. When you opened your eyes, the room was dark and it reeked of death. Your shoulder ached and your body felt heavy. You looked around. There was no Dean, no Sam, no kids. They were gone.

You tried to struggle but the chains holding you up and the heaviness outweighed your will. You groaned, only just hearing the footsteps getting closer.

“Aw, somebody’s awake. Have a good dream?”

The man you saw when you looked up didn’t look human. His skin was pale, tribal tattoos covered every inch of his body. His eyes started to glow blue.

“Dream?” Your voice cracked from dehydration. You looked around, a needle stuck in your arm as you hung from chains connected to the ceiling. Then the flashes came. The happiness, the love, the pride, the feeling that nothing could go wrong. One big happy family. Tears threatened to overflow.

“It wasn’t real...”

“Oh honey, nothing that perfect could ever be real. Did you really think it was?”

Your face hardened, “You son of a bitch! I’m gonna kill you!” You struggled against the chains to charge forward but it was useless. Along with the dream, your strength was gone. The sight made the djinn laugh.

“Aaahh, I do love when they struggle. But, it’s time for you to sleep again and give me that sweet, sweet blood of yours.” He smiled and his eyes began to glow again, his tattoos seemingly moving down. You felt tired and went to sleep again.

“Mommy! Mommy! Look how high I’m going!”

3 DAYS EARLIER

“Dean, Y/N.” Sam called his brother, “Got a case.”

The case was in Houston Texas, almost a days worth drive. Sam had a theory as to what it was because they had seen their type before. This guy was leaving bodies in the wide open, blue handprints left on their stomachs. An easy giveaway, as Sam called it.

After setting up in the motel, Sam and Dean left you to your own devices while they went and talked to the relatives of one of the deceased. the case seemed like it was gonna be an easy kill and go home but when the brothers returned, they didn’t have any luck. 

Dean sighed and fell to the bed. He smoothed a hand down his face, he seemed quite tired.

“Dean why don't you just get some sleep? You too, Sam. I can do some research for now.” you smiled at both of them.

Sam, who reached into the small fridge on the dresser behind you to grab a water, put his hand to your shoulder. “Thanks, Y/N. That would be appreciated.”

He gulped some water and flopped onto the other bed in the room. Both of the boys were out in minutes. 

After a few hours you found that Djinns tend to live in ruins, usually – the bigger, the better. With that in mind, you looked up places like that and bingo bango, you had your target.

You started to open your mouth to wake up Sam and Dean but with the way Dean was snoring and Sam looking so comfortable under his covers, you couldn't bring yourself to do it. sleep was something they were long over due for. So, you grabbed your gun and knife and headed out, hot wiring a rusty old pickup truck in fear of Dean’s wrath if he saw you took Baby.

The only way to kill one was a silver blade dipped in lambs blood so you had to make a pit stop for that before reaching your destination.

It was pitch black outside, no doubt most people would be asleep. But nope, not you. Had to slice and dice before hitting that pillow oh so nice. You took a deep breath as you stood in front of a half burnt asylum. Best known because a patient who was getting abused here set it aflame. What better ruin to hide in?

“Better now than later, Y/N.” you surmised to yourself. If you could handle this on your own maybe Sam and Dean, the two big doofs would finally look your way. You feel in love with Dean first, the flirty of the two. You met him first on a ghost hunt. He almost stole it but you ended up working together on it. 

The next time you saw him was with his brother, when they needed backup for a case. One you were willing to provide, anything to see Dean again. Then Sam came swooping in making you fall for him too. His intelligence blew you away. The way he cared for those around him and would do anything for anyone who needed it. You’d been stuck to them every since that case.

The Winchester brother got you, hook line and sinker. There was no way around it, your thoughts filled with them. But you couldn’t confess that to them. Why would they even like you like that. At least you thought so.

You quietly stepped into the asylum, checking each room as you went by.

Sam groaned as he turned onto his left side, slowly blinking his eyes awake. He noticed the light of his laptop still on. He sat up, wiping away any sleep left behind.

“Y/N?” he looked over to his right, the bed empty. Then he looked at Dean’s, so was his except his brother. He got up and walked to the bathroom to see if she was in there but the light was off. He started to panic internally. 

Sam raced to the laptop to check what she had looked at. All of Y/N’s research was right there and even where she thought the Djinn was.

“Dean!” Sam grabbed his coat since he had fallen asleep in his shirt and jeans.

His brother jumped, “Huh- wha?”

“Y/N went after the Djinn by herself.” that snapped Dean awake.

“What?!” Sam tossed him his jacket and the keys, Dean slipping his gun in the back of his jeans and both of them rushing out to the impala.

The ride to the asylum was silent with tension in the air. Both brothers were worried of course, Dean angry at himself for not keeping an eye on her. She’d been with them for a while now. She was useful to them, not only that but they both came to care for her.

“She’ll be okay, Dean. She’s tough.” Sam cut through the tension. 

Dean didn’t want to say much, his thoughts going a million miles in his head thinking if she was safe or even alive, so he opted for, “Yeah.” His grip on the steering wheel tightened, something that hadn’t gone unnoticed by his brother.

Sam pulled out his phone, bringing up Y/N’s contact. If she was in trouble, they had to get to her fast.

You’d been walking around for a little bit now, but still no sign of the Djinn. Maybe you’d gotten the place wrong? Maybe there was another ruin the monster preferred. But this one was just too perfect to pass up, it had to be this one.

You walked further down a corridor, the walls had soot all over them, parts of it burned down to the dry wall. You turned when you heard something move in the distance. Your eyes narrowed when you saw nothing there. You faced the way you were walking again only to see the Djinn right in front of you, smirking. 

“Well, well, what do we have here.” You reacted immediately and jabbed the knife towards him, but he was quicker. He’d grabbed your wrist and twisted it so you’d drop your weapon. You groaned but that was the only thing you’d give him. Not wanting to give him the satisfaction of seeing you in pain.

He sniffed up you neck and into your hair, making you flinch away. “You smell... delectable.” With his last word, you saw a faint glow behind you and his hand come up to cover your eyes. After that, you were out.

*

Dean and Sam had just arrived at the location you had saved on Sam’s computer. They both agreed it was definitely the place the Djinn would be. They got their guns and knives ready, putting the knife in their waistbands and keeping their guns glued to in front of them.

They entered the same way you had but one brother went left and the other went right, splitting up to hopefully find you quicker. The hallways smelled old and a scent of burnt wood still lingered in the air. However long it had been since the fire, the reminders of it were still there. 

Dean couldn’t lie, the place had an eerie feel to it. He checked around every corner, in every room, and so far, no sign of you.

Sam did the same, checking carefully, making sure to stay quiet so he could have an advantage. He entered a larger room than the others he had passed. It almost looked like the nave of a church, benches lined up in rows with space in the middle to walk until you hit a few steps to climb. At the center of the steps, you hung from chains.

“Y/N!” Sam whispered trying to get your attention as he quickly made his way to you. You gave no response. You didn’t move at all and that worried Sam. He tapped your face a few times and held it up, whispering your name again. Nothing.

The doors flew open and Sam looked over from you. Dean’s body flew a few feet before he landed with a grunt.

“Dean!” Sam shouted to his brother. Dean grunted, “Heya, Sammy.” sarcastically. The Djinn walked in behind him.

“Is it Thanksgiving because it seems like I’m gonna have a big meal I’m thankful for.” Sam’s jaw clenched and Dean stood up from the ground.

“Get her out of here Sam, I got this.”

*

“Mommy! Mommy! Did you see how high I was going?” Junior shouted as he raced towards you. You smiled brightly, “Yes I did, Bug. Did you have fun?” he jumped up on your lap, nodding and breathing heavily. Dean walked up behind him and leaned down to give you a kiss. It was something you savored. You looked across the table at Sam who had your daughter in his hands, squealing at him as he attacked her face with kisses. But something in your gut told you this was too good to be true. You were kind of having Deja vu.

Then you heard it. Your name was being called. 

“Sam?” you asked. The Sam across from you looked up and frowned.

“What’s the matter?” he questioned.

Again. You’re name. But this time, you definitely knew it didn’t come from him. Something wasn’t right, you felt it. This world, it wasn’t real. Flashes of memory made you realize, you were a hunter. Hunters didn’t get to live like this. They either died from a monster or by the end of a barrel. They didn’t get the white picket fence happiness.

You set Junior down on the ground, slowly getting up.

“Y/N? Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” Dean grabbed your arm, his face twisted with concern.

“This isn’t real. None of this is real.” you whispered.

“Not real? Baby, this is as real as it gets.” Dean answered back.

“No. No no no. I have to get out of here.” The despair and sadness you suddenly felt tore your heart to pieces. You wanted so bad for it to be real. To be with the two men you so dearly loved, to have a family with them. But you knew it wasn’t your reality.

You reached into your purse, grabbing the keys and taking off in the impala. Your heart raced, you didn’t really know where you were going. At this point you just wanted it all to end. So, you pushed harder on the gas pedal and crashed into a metal pole.

You gasped awake, heart struggling to clam. The feeling of the crash still lingering. You currently sat in the back of the impala, the familiar rumble helped to sooth you.

“Hey, sweetheart. How are you feeling?” You looked up and saw Dean smiling at you behind the wheel.

“What happened? Where’s the Djinn?” you asked. Sam turned so he could face you, a gentle smile crossing his features.

“He’s gone. You don’t have to worry about him.” You nodded and the car fell into a silence. Dean glanced back at you through the rearview mirror and you had a feeling you knew the question he was itching to ask.

“We were married.” you spoke, the boys turning their attention to you.

Sam looked at his brother before clearing his throat, “W-What?”

Tears pricked at your eyes, “We had kids and I was pregnant.” You laughed and sniffled, “We had a white picket fence life. Junior, was Dean and I’s son, Mira was Sam and I’s daughter. We loved each other- I... loved both of you. I still do.”

“Y/N-” Sam was speechless.

“No- I, please, Sam. Just... don’t. I know we can never have that. You and Dean probably wouldn’t even go for that, let alone have feelings for me.” The tears spilled onto your cheeks and once again, the car was silent.

After a minute, the impala slowed and pulled off to the side of the road. You sniffed and looked up, Dean turning around in his seat.

“You don’t get to say that. You don’t get to say what I do and don’t feel because I know what I want. When Sam told me you’d gone off on your own, it scared the hell outta me. I didn’t know if we’d reach you in time or if I’d have to see you dead in some ruin. I know how I feel, Y/N, how we feel.” You followed his gaze to his brother. Sam smiled and nodded.

“We love you too, Y/N.”

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[warriorlid14]

First of all I love your writing!!!

For the prompt thing: "get over here, you doof"

Thank you!! This took a while, but here ya go:

----

The instant Ron walked through the door of his flat, he was instantly hit with the smell of something burning. It was immediately followed by the sound of his typically well-mannered wife cursing which was never a good sign.

“Hermione?” he asked, as he stepped into the kitchen. Her back was turned to him, so he couldn’t see her face. He could see though that her hair was bushier than usual as well as the various bowls and spoons covered in some sort of dough. “What happened?”

“The biscuits are burnt,” she replied flatly as she placed down a container of what he assumed were the burnt biscuits on the counter.

“Well, did you-”

“I told you that I don’t like using magic to bake, Ron!” she practically screeched, turning towards him. She must have caught sight of the hurt look on his face because she immediately backtracked, saying, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled, I just-” Immediately her eyes began to fill up with tears, and he took a step towards her.

“Hey,” he said gently. “What’s going on?”

She shook her head, and tried to wipe a tear from her eye. “Nothing,” she said. “It’s- nothing.”

“It’s not nothing,” he said, reaching out towards her.

But Hermione shook her head and said, “I need to clean up.”

She stepped back, but he put a hand on her arm and said , “I’ll do it.” She gave him a skeptical look. “Go sit down,” he told her, nodding towards the couch. “I’ll catch up with you in a minute.” She sniffed, but nodded and headed out the kitchen.

Ron immediately took out his wand and waved it. He watched for a few seconds as the dishes floated towards the sink. He cast a quick aguamenti and, with a quick look to where Hermione was, decided he’d leave them to soak and finish washing them later. 

He stepped out to the living room and walked towards the couch. Hermione looked more composed, though her eyes were still red and she was staring at the wall with a thoughtful look on her face.

“So,” he said, cautiously sitting down next to her, “what’s going on?”

She was quiet for a few seconds, then said, “I don’t know how to properly make biscuits.” Ron blinked, sure that he was missing something. He opened his mouth to speak, but Hermione interrupted him. “And I don’t know how to knit a decent-looking jumper. And I can calm James down, but it took months to get there!” Her voice grew steadily louder. “And all the Weasley women seem to excel at being mothers! And I’ve only prepared a bottle twice because witches only breastfeed apparently, but maybe I’ll be one of those women that can’t breastfeed! And by the way, no book can decide whether to introduce solids at four months or six months! And did you know that your baby can die if you don’t lay it down on their belly instead of their back!??”

“Hey,” he said, once the tears began to flow. She finally looked up at him when he took her hands in his. “Hermione…” he began, trying to find the right words to comfort her. “Hermione,” he said again. “You’re not my mum,” he began slowly. “And you’re not Ginny. And you’re not Fleur. But that’s good!” he said quickly, as she had begun to pull away. “Because our kid is not James. And they’re not Vic. And they’re not my siblings, which thank Merlin,” he added, hoping she would laugh. He got a weak smile in return.

“This isn’t- it isn’t a test we can cram for and then get an O in.” And oh how she had studied, he thought. She had bought about two dozen parenting books the instant they found out she was pregnant and had gone through them all almost four months into her pregnancy.

“That doesn’t make me feel better-”

“No, it’s great that you’re preparing!” he said quickly. “I just mean that as much as we prepare, there are some stuff we’ll just have to learn along the way. And it’s not like you’re alone! It’s true that you don’t know how to make biscuits-” She shot him a mild glare. “But I do. And I don’t know how to make a perfect study guide- but you do.Between the two of us, we can figure this out. And if we don’t know, we can ask. Besides, there’s no reason why we can’t buy a jumper instead of knitting it. Just don’t tell mum,” he added quickly.

She gave a small laugh, and said. “I suppose so… I guess I was being a bit ridiculous.”

“Of course you weren’t,” he said sincerely. Then he smiled at her, opened his arms, and said, “But get over here you doof.”

He heard her mutter something like “arse”, but she still scooched over and buried her head in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer, resting his chin on her head and inhaling the scent of her hair.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, before he said, “Maybe our kid won’t even like biscuits.” And then, with a grin and gently poking her on her side, said, “Maybe they won’t like Hogwarts: A History.”

“Maybe they won’t like the Cannons.”

He gasped dramatically. “Don’t even joke about that.”

They both laughed, and he leaned down to place a kiss on her head. “You’re Hermione Granger, smartest witch of her age. I’ve never seen you fail at anything you set your mind to. You’re going to be a great mother.”

She looked up at him, a smile on her face. “You’re going to be a great father too, you know.”

He desperately hoped that was true. He leaned down and gave her a small peck on the lips.

“Yeah. I reckon we have one lucky kid.”

-----

Thanks for the ask!

[woulddieforperrytheplatypus]

Let's say Perry is allowed to reveal his secret identity now that Doof has given up being evil. As we all know, the last time he revealed his was an agent to the boys, they were all in an insanely dangerous situation and it was too much to take in at once. How does Perry do it this time? He sets up a "scavenger hunt" for the family. One by one, he leaves clues for the kids to find and pick up on, like his human-like expressions, his har, his lair entrances, the pamphlets, the 2D slideshow, etc.

OOH NOW THAT IS AN IDEA 👀 if I wasn't already writing a fic that's on a deadline I would totally write this as an actual fic right now like I'm not even joking (but since I don't have time to write a whole new fic atm I'm gonna do that summarizing-my-ideas-in-seven-million-incoherent-paragraphs thing I do way too often and then maybe write a fic later (unless someone else wants to write it *wink wink nudge nudge*))

First of all, I think it's worth noting that the reason Perry can't reveal his identity is that it would put his family in danger and OWCA's insurance wouldn't cover it if they got hurt, so for Perry to be allowed to reveal his identity, he'd probably have to leave OWCA entirely. Given his reaction to being replaced by Peter the Panda in It's About Time, I can absolutely see him deciding that if he's not thwarting Heinz, he doesn't want to work for OWCA anymore. If he was willing to hang up his hat all the way back in season one, by the end of the summer, there's definitely been enough development in their relationship that he'd probably consider his job entirely Heinz-centric and not want it any other way (does this make sense idk what are words)

That's important for three reasons. One: it's just cute that he likes Heinz so much. Two: it means he probably won't be sneaking away as much during the day (though I'd assume he does still visit Heinz every few days). Three: it's a great opportunity to plug my fic about Perry retiring from OWCA and revealing his identity to his family (but it's via kinda a family meeting and Carl's there bc Carl's Best Boi™ which I'd thought was cute until I saw this idea and now I think this one's cuter lol)

Now, onto the show! or, you know, the long rant. same thing.

I think he'd probably start with subtle facial expressions. Maybe Ferb would give him some belly rubs and he'd smile a little, or Candace would tell at him and he'd glare at her — enough that they'd definitely notice, but not necessarily enough that they'd know they saw it. And it would be entirely situational, too — I don't think he'd acknowledge words yet; he'd acknowledge actions and tone of voice, but that's about it.

And then after a couple days, when he knew Phineas and Ferb (and maybe Candace; I'm not sure when she's pick up on it) were keeping an eye on him, he'd make it a little more obvious. He'd give slightly bigger smiles or more aggressive glares, so the kids wouldn't just think it was them picking up on more of his body language now that he's home now — they'd have to realize it's a genuine change at this point.

And maybe that's around when he starts reacting to words. Linda would ask if Perry's been fed yet, and Perry immediately runs to his food bowl (whether he's been fed or not; he would gladly accept an extra meal). Or Candace makes a sarcastic remarks, and Perry growls at her. Things that he'd obviously have to understand the words for because there's no obvious tone of voice for an ordinary pet to pick up.

And when everyone's thoroughly confused (not suspicious yet, but confused) he moves on to the hat. He'll be sitting out in the yard with the boys over the weekend while they're trying to think of an invention for the day, and when they both look away for a split second, he slips his fedora on and pretends nothing happened. The boys definitely wouldn't take it from him — they saw him on the chimney with a pair of binoculars once and shrugged it off — but they'd get a good laugh out of it.

And then they're hanging out in the bedroom and the boys look away and Perry puts his hat on again, and this time it's still funny, but it's weird. Where does this fedora keep coming from? He didn't have it a second ago. It definitely wasn't lying around the room. It just appeared on his head. And then the next evening during dinner, it happens again. Perry has no hat, he walks under the table, and walks out the other side with a fedora on. Ferb points it out, and Perry just smiles.

I feel like he'd have to go a little further before showing them the lair. Maybe he starts "standing on his hind legs," but with his butt on the ground so he's still technically sitting but more upright than usual. Maybe he uses his hands more, picking things up or hitting things around. Maybe Phineas is about to do his homework and realizes he doesn't have a pencil, and Perry throws one at him and then immediately drops to all fours, but purposely does it slow enough that Phineas and Ferb notice that he did it. 

I'm gonna kinda switch the order up on you here. A week or so into this, Perry starts walking away. Perry never walks away. He's always either there or he's not; they never see where he's going. So Phineas and Ferb follow him, and they see him take the tunnel in the side of the house down to his lair. Now, Perry has absolutely no idea whether he should expect them to follow him, but he's hopeful. And, sure enough, they do, only to realize it's yet another entrance to the spy lair that Ferb built over the summer — except this time, Ferb finally gets to say that he didn't build it. They both look at Perry like they're expecting him to come out and say something, but he just starts walking up the stairs to leave (which admittedly is a pain in the ass but it's not like he can take the hovercar)

And maybe that night, Perry decides to take it a little further. He waits until the kids are asleep and then hops off the bed and just stands there, waiting for someone to wake up. And it takes a while -- long enough that Perry’s starting to debate just giving up and going back to sleep -- but then Ferb opens his eyes just a little... and then sits up and rubs his eyes because there is no way he’s seeing that. And this time, because it’s dark and it’s late and Ferb’s tired, Perry just stays standing there and looking at him, and, because he’s feeling particularly daring, he waves. Ferb just stares at him for a solid 30 more seconds, so Perry gives him an awkward smile. Without taking his eyes off the platypus, Ferb stands up, walks over to Phineas’s bed, and wakes him up. Phineas is just like ??? and Ferb’s like, “Do you see this, too?” and Phineas looks over and Perry just walks over to the bed (on his hind legs), hops up, and curls up next to him like nothing happened. And, like, what do you do in that situation, right? So Ferb just goes back to bed, and Phineas closes his eyes again, and they both go back to sleep.

And in the morning, the first thing Phineas and Ferb do when they wake up is look at Perry, who’s now snuggled up on Ferb’s bed (because his bed-switching isn’t going to change just because he’s slowly giving up his cover). Perry doesn’t do anything at first, so the boys look at each other and Phineas is like, “Last night, did he...?” and Ferb just nods and they both look back at Perry who just gives them that small smile that you’re never really sure if you see.

And I wanna get Candace in on the action so let’s say this time when Perry walks away, it’s right after the boys’ Sunday invention, and Candace is all annoyed that she couldn’t bust them and Perry looks up at her and then walks away, and usually she wouldn’t care but she’s bored and annoyed and what can it hurt, you know? And Perry leads her to the staircase and picks up the handle to open it in his mouth and then drops it to let Candace get at it, so she opens it and sees the staircase and immediately runs back to the house like “MOM THE BOYS BUILT AN UNDERGROUND STAIRCASE IN THE BACKYARD” and Phineas and Ferb are like “No we didn’t?” so they follow her out there and Perry’s still standing there and Phineas wonder aloud if it leads to the same spy base as the tree and the house and Candace is like ?!?!?! 

And Perry hops on the railing and slide down the stairs (because he is not climbing down all of them) and the kids have to follow on foot because they would absolutely not fit on the platysized railing. That gives Perry extra time to get set up, so when they get to the lair (again), Perry’s standing on his hind legs, wearing his fedora, and using his computer. 

I feel like Candace would be the one to ask what’s going on because a) she hadn’t been paying as much attention as the boys, b) she didn’t see Perry standing the night before, and c) she hadn’t seen the lair before. And Perry just walks over and hands them each the “So You’ve Discovered Your Pet Is A Secret Agent” pamphlet and they’re just like 0_0 and as they’re flipping through it Perry goes back to working on his computer.

There has to be some sort of conversation here, but at this point, they’ve been seeing so many clues that I don’t think they’re too surprised, which was the whole goal -- they were never supposed to figure it out, but they were supposed to have some idea that he was more than what meets the eye. So let’s say the first question is from Phineas, who asks if Perry can talk, and Perry shakes his head. So Candace asks, just to double check, that he can understand them, and Perry nods. So then she asks if he’s always been able to, and he nods again. And Phineas asks why he’s never told them, and that’s when the computer comes in.

Perry opens the folder full of second dimension pics and he flips through them slowly so the kids can see them, and at that point there are way too many questions for him to keep up with so he doesn’t bother. And eventually they’re done looking at pictures, and Phineas asks when that was and why they don’t remember it, so Perry takes his pamphlet and circles the line about host families and memory erasing and relocating and then he hands it back, and Phineas reads the line out loud so Ferb and Candace can hear, too. Ferb’s the one to connect the dots and realize that the reason they don’t remember those pictures is that they had their memories erased, which Perry confirms, and Phineas asks why he’s telling them now if they’re either going to have their memories erased or lose him (and then proceeds to get very nervous about losing him) and Perry takes the pamphlet back again and adds a little carrot in the title between “your pet” and “a secret agent” and writes “used to be” and they realize that means they get to keep him as a pet and know everything and it’s a happy reunion and nothing like the second dimension and everyone lives happily ever after! 

... that was the least coherent thing i’ve ever written in my life

[amerrierworld]

Wicked

Marvel (Thor Ragnarok) oneshot

For anon 

Summary: Thor sets you up on a date with Hela, and everything seems to go well until old high-school ‘friends’ interrupt your meal.

Characters: Hela x fem!reader, Thor, former high school friends (I haven’t given them names or too much detail, so imagine whoever you’d like :) )

Word Count: 2,107

Warnings: uh, annoying high school girls?

“Are you sure about this?”

“Of course!” Thor responded, trotting next to you. “Trust me, you’ll love her.”

“Hm, why am I finding that so difficult to believe?” you huffed, pulling at the sleeves of your shirt as you walked down the street. “If she’s anything like her brothers, I doubt I’ll be able to sit across from her without slapping her across the face immediately.”

“Very funny, Y/N,” he responded. “Give it a chance, will you? You’ve been single for forever. And Hela’s been single for, well, eternity.” 

“I can’t help but wonder if this is just a scheme of yours and Loki’s to try and keep Hela off your butts from what I’ve been told.”

The God of Thunder shot you a look as he led you inside a diner, winking at a few passing people who squealed in delight at recognizing him. You rolled your eyes.

As the two of you waited at the front of the diner for your date, you shuffled nervously, hugging your purse tightly.

“Just don’t question her power, you know?” Thor was going on about all the tips he could think of so Hela wouldn’t accidentally kill you and everyone else enjoying their lunches.

“And don’t bring up family, bit of a sore topic that. Steer clear of Asgard and the Avengers, she’s still a little salty about not getting to rule it and such. Oh, and don’t talk about me or our brother too much, she finds us really annoying.”

“I wonder why?” 

“Haha,” he said, bumping your arm. An easy silence fell between you two, and you glanced around to see anyone that might stick out to you as a god.

“What does she look like?”

“Oh, irritating, mostly,” Thor sighed. “Like an absolute pain in your ass, completely incoherent of understanding other people’s lives-,”

“Stop it, you doof,” you said, shoving him lightly. “I’m serious.”

“Right, well she looks a little like Loki- same dark hair, love the colour green. Bit of a copy cat if you ask me. Tall, just as tall as me-,”

“Intimidating, cunning, and absolutely bored to death by her little brother’s dialogue,” a smooth voice spoke up behind you. “Is this her, then?”

You turned around and stared, stunned at the sight in front of you. She was tall, with black boots adding an inch or two so she towered above you. With a tight, dark green tank top hugging her curves and showing off her toned arms and a pair of black leather pants she looked, frankly, delicious. 

You swallowed thickly and blushed as you met her gaze, piercing green eyes framed by a mess of black waves. 

“Hello sister,” Thor said dryly. “This is my friend, Y/N. Treat her nicely.”

“Oh, don’t worry little brother. I don’t bite... often.”

She gave you a coy smirk and you felt your face become even more flushed. Thor clapped your shoulder.

“Right, I’m off then. You two have fun,” he shot his sister a warning look and she smirked back before he was gone.

“Should we find a seat, darling?” Hela began, pressing a hand to your back. You nodded meekly as you watched her. She moved swiftly like a cat waiting to pounce. Either way, her sudden touch on your body sent your heartbeat into a wonderful overdrive as the hostess led the two of you to a booth.

-

“Do you do this often?” Hela asked, grumbling as she scanned the menu.

“What? Dating?”

“No, ordering food like this,” she said. “How are you supposed to just pick one?”

Her dark eyebrows were furrowed intently and you couldn’t help but giggle, making her look up.

“We can split an appetizer first, if you want,” you offered. “You don’t have to just pick one, but it’s not very common to go scrounging on like, three meals at a restaurant.”

She hummed in acknowledgement, her gaze flickering down to the menu again, almost nervously. 

“So what would you like to start with?” you asked. “The calamari is pretty good, unless you don’t like fish? Maybe nachos...”

“What are nachos?”

You blinked at her, stunned once again, but for a completely different reason. This time you burst into full-on snickering that didn’t dissipate for a solid few minutes, with Hela staring at you in confusion until you were done.

“What?”

You patted her hand. “We’re getting nachos. I can’t believe you’ve been on Earth with those two knucklehead brothers of yours and you haven’t ever had nachos.”

Hela was looking at your hands touching before a grin split across her face and suddenly she seemed more at ease.

“Nachos it is.”

-

Your meal with Hela was going wonderfully, which was a surprise for both of you. You steered clear of the advised topics that Thor had told you about, but found that conversation flowed easily enough without it; Hela was more intrigued about Earth and your every day routine than any realm-enslaving conquest she’d ever been on. When Asgard did come up, it was always in passing, or by her own choice, and you listened whenever she spoke of it, holding her hand tightly. 

You learned her favourite colour is green, that she had a pet wolf named Fenris that she couldn’t wait for you to meet and that she’d only been on Earth for a little while, so she wasn’t really sure how to act human around everyone. 

Nodding along, your hands intertwined easily and automatically. Hers were cool to the touch and you found yourself tracing her figure with your eyes as she spoke. The conversation turned to you, talking about your upbringing, and you were eagerly talking to her about your life when a high-pitched, god-awful squeal caught your attention. 

“Oh my god! No way! Y/N?”

Rising from a table a bit further from your booth was a trio of girls from high-school that you’d hardly talked to since graduating. Your stomach plummeted; they were the exact few ‘friends’ that you had during your four years that you avoided after leaving that school behind once you realized how horribly toxic they really were.

Your face paled as you forced a smile on your face, and your fingers suddenly had Hela’s hand in a trembling death-grip. She noticed, eyes scanning between you and the group, silently watching. 

“Girl, it’s so great to see you! How long has it been? God, you look so different than you used to!”

You grimaced and said a weak ‘hi’ to them. You pulled your hands from Hela’s and buried them under the table to wring them together, sweaty and trembling. 

“What are you up to these days? Do you work in the city? I never would have thought you would have made it, you know? None of us could have imagined it in high school! You were always so weird back then, right?”

The same preppy tones, glamour bags and glittery lip gloss stared at you like demons coming to haunt you again. You had been much different than their clique from school, and yet you had found yourself wound up in their drama and constant bickering anyways. 

Through your haze, you made out a clear, cool voice from across you speaking up.

“I’m sure Y/N wasn’t anymore weird than anyone else who went to that school of yours,” Hela chipped in. You came back to reality to watch Hela speak with the leader of the girl group, a loud and pretentious girl who had a way of making everyone feel useless without trying. Yet your date was staring at her with a feline look, waiting for something to happen. 

“And who is this, Y/N? Your girlfriend?”

“I’m Hela, pleased to meet you,” she ignored the question and reached to shake the girl’s hand. In a split second you saw her face contort in an ungodly pain from Hela’s grip. She struggled to pull her hand free and when she did she was huffing, clearly offended. You smirked a little.

“Huh, quite a grip there, lady. Martial arts?”

“No, just a lot of experience killing people.”

The girls chuckled nervously. “What, are you one of those Avenge folk or whatever?” they scoffed, cackling amongst themselves as if they had made the best joke of the century.

“No, but Thor, who spends a lot of time with them, is in fact my brother.”

“O. M. G. What! You know Thor? As in God of Thunder? Like, super-hot blonde dude with a hammer and stuff?”

“That’s the one. Although he seems more fond of Y/N than me, sibling-rivalry and all that.”

In an instant you were bombarded with questions how did you meet him? is he really that hot? god! isn’t he an absolute dream? c’mon Y/N let us meet him you owe us that much at least.

Your heartbeat sped up again and you found it difficult to breathe, clamping your hands together. Your leg was bouncing up and down until you felt a heeled foot press against your calf, rubbing up and down soothingly. 

“If you’d like, I could introduce you much faster you know,” Hela drawled, drawing their attention like a predator playing with its prey. “I can easily summon him if you want to come outside for a second. It’ll be too much of a commotion indoors.”

They were scuffling about like puppies begging for snacks as Hela stood up, towering over them. You felt nervous, wondering what she was going to do but she turned to you and winked before saying,

“Be back in a minute, babe.”

Once you got your bearings again, you shot up from your seat to follow and hurry outside, afraid to find three corpses littered on the street. You hated high school bullies, sure, but not that much.

As soon as you stepped out the front doors, high-pitched screaming erupted from the streets and you watched all three girls scamper for their lives, away from Hela and a massive black wolf that was growling and roaring at them by her side. A shimmering portal was pulsing behind Fenris, and Hela was nearly doubled over in laughter as they ran.

When she saw you approach nervously she stretched out a hand.

“Don’t worry, he doesn’t bite either, unless I ask him to.”

She gave you the sweetest of smiles and your anxiety melted away. You placed your hand in hers and she pulled you closer to pet Fenris, who nuzzled your palm. 

“Off with you, now,” Hela said, patting the wolf’s head. “You don’t fit anywhere in this world.”

Fenris purred in protest and Hela tutted. “Now, now, I’ll visit soon. Thor keeps telling me if I bring you here they’re either going to hunt me or fear me, and apparently that’s not what the Avengers want right now. Scram now.”

Fenris turned like a wounded puppy and you giggled as he grumbled, before stepping through the portal and disappearing. 

“You alright, darling?” Hela asked suddenly, standing much closer than before, her face inches from yours.

“Y-yeah, I think so. Now that they’re gone.”

“They were absolute bitches, you know that?”

You laughed softly. “Yeah, they’ve always been like that.”

“Were you really once friends with them?”

“Yeah, surprisingly. I was a different person back then, and a lot of things happened that just weren't right. Eventually I locked them out of my memory but seeing them like that; that was the best revenge ever.”

“I’m glad you liked it. Though I’m afraid when Thor gave me a blueprint of ‘typical first dates’, summoning a giant wolf and scaring off old bullies wasn’t anywhere on the plan.”

“Oh, that’s alright. Regular first dates are boring anyway.”

She grinned again, a hand snaking around your waist and pressing a kiss to your forehead. You sucked in a breath.

“I couldn’t let them stand there and belittle you like that, it angered me so much.”

“Hey, at least you didn’t kill anyone,” you said, poking her playfully. “I consider that progress.”

She smiled at you.

“I had a wonderful time, Y/N.”

“Me too,” you breathed, before leaning up and pressing your lips to hers this time. She held you tightly as you kissed, her cool touch making you relaxed and dizzy all over.

You pulled away and brushed your hands through her hair, feeling the soft textures run through your fingers.

“Does that mean a second date is in order? Thor said a first kiss shouldn’t be until the third date, at least.”

“Thor is an idiot,” you mumbled against her lips. “I may owe him one for the best first date ever, but he’s terrible with dating advice.”

A/N: this was so much fun to write! thank you for the anon who prompted this <3 i don’t know about you, but I definitely had some specific people in mind when writing the hs girls and it made me very satisfied to write them running for the hills. let me know what you think folks!

[galaxina-the-pyro]

How would you improve the episode AYA?

...wait...you’re asking me?

I...I didn’t expect this...

The thing is is that I don’t think I could possibly come up with ideas for this better than, say, @authenticcadence18 or @springsfordays because their ideas are just too good (seriously, check them out, they have the literal best ideas for a rewrite of AYA, holy crap).

But if I were to rewrite it...hm...let’s make a checklist for stuff about AYA that just miffed me:

1. Plot B is fine. Plot B was probably the best part of AYA - Doof’s dilemma made sense for his character (and is hilarious), tied in with the name of the episode, and involved fun little shenanigans. My only gripe is that they didn’t go MONDO insane with it at the end, and said ending felt really abrupt.

(I also wish that, somehow, even Doof was involved with that “everyone knew” bit, but we’re gonna be scrapping that joke for this story - that joke is FUNNY, but it’s also degrading to Phineas, and is sorta a nice way of saying “yeah, you’re stupid for not noticing her feelings even though she’s not entitled to them - you’re the problem. It’s not like the episode is trying to hint at you two having switched roles, no, you’re the only one who was being oblivious and stupid.”)

2. We cut out Plot C entirely. Everyone trying to get Phineas and Isabella together was just...ugh. Why? And they had the audacity to compare what they were doing to all the AMAZING things they did when they were younger, like, guys - you set up some tables, decorations, and cooked them what I can assume to be a run-of-the-mill restaurant dinner - that has NOTHING on a rollercoaster through downtown. And their applause at that sweet but ultimately lackluster confession? Hurt. So much. Now that I think about it, it felt condescending, it unintentionally emphasized HOW uninspired this confession (as much as I love it) was, and it felt like they were taking credit for something they didn’t do.

And if we’re NOT gonna cut out Plot C...have Plot C be about FERB? Leaving for COLLEGE? Out of COUNTRY? Cuz I have a hard time believing that Phineas and Ferb are just OKAY with separating at such a long distance - heck, in “Candace Gets Busted”, FERB is the one who assumes that one day he and his brother are gonna own their own place together. It should at least be BROUGHT UP, don’t you think? (I’m conflicted on whether or not I’d keep Montessa in the ring or at least SHOW US how Ferbnessa happened, because I think what’s weirding people out is that they’re assuming that Vanessa literally waited for Ferb to turn 18 to start dating him - when I think it’s more likely that they kinda JUST started dating during the beginning of Summer? But I think stuff like that really SHOULD be explained because even though I don’t think it’s that weird, I understand why OTHER PEOPLE wouldn’t like the idea)

3. I kinda feel like this should have had more songs? I dunno why, I feel like this all could have been improved if we got a fullblown musical out of this (and...this may be me wanting a “What Might Have Been” reprise, lol) - like, make fun of HSM or something, you can’t tell me you wouldn’t have.

4. I kinda wanted to see more of the “where are they now”. Like, Jeremy, Stacey, Little Suzie Johnson, even that one couple with the lady who’s always like “what did you think, an anniversary dinner was just going to fall from the sky?” - I like stuff like that, it’s so much fun to think about. Also...I legit have so much anxiety over Perry never interacting with him owners ONCE in that episode, and even more anxiety over Pinky never making an appearance at all. Heck, if there was a good time to show us what the HECK happened to Django, now would be a great time.

5. I would have given the episode a unique intro, ala “Night of the Living Pharmacists” and “Last Day of Summer” - like, AYA is as much of a status quo shifter as those two episodes, why was it given the “Phineas and Ferb Get Busted” treatment?

6. Here’s a brilliant thought - NO ONE tells Phineas about Isabella’s crush? How about instead Phineas goes and wants to check in on her, because he really misses her and doesn’t understand why they don’t talk anymore (and he’s tried before, and they’ve nearly had conversations, but Isabella’s just too busy) - did he do something wrong? Is Isabella just too busy now? He needs to know. That should have been his priority, none of this “FrIeNd ZoNe” nonsense.

7. I would have made this into a near movie-length special. With all the topics that this episode brought up, particularly the whole “manipulating the situation” thing, I feel like a longer episode would have given them more time to talk about how stuff like that is...not okay.

[READ THE ACTUAL REWRITE OF THE EPISODE (well, my take at least) UNDER THE CUT!]

Okay, with those out of the way, how I would have written Phinabella the Movie...I mean...Act Your Age (I warn you, it’s not gonna be as good as @authenticcadence18′s or @springsfordays‘s ideas, so if you want quality stuff and not just mushy fanfiction fodder I’d check their stuff out):

I would have sorta made this entire thing take place during the “What Might Have Been” song - what that means is that it’s a collage of memories. How Isabella and Phineas met, how Isabella first got her “crush” (if you can really call it that, girl was full out in love lol), them building stuff with the gang during their canon ages, them going into highschool, Isabella ultimately choosing to give up her crush to maintain her friendship with Phineas (because her choosing to not be as close to Phineas because of a crush isn’t an option), Isabella’s first boyfriend (which probably’s gonna hurt a lot of fans, cuz I envision that to NOT be Phineas; but it’s Phinabella endgame, so relax); the episode just centers on the gang (mainly Isabella since it’s from her perspective) growing up.

Like, yes, all of the memories are gonna be Phinabella centered, but we gotta have SOME side-stories and junk, like maybe how Baljeet gets together with Ginger (and...how they break up...please don’t kill me), what ultimately leads Ferb to want to go back to England for studies (maybe it’s him wanting to be his own person and not wanting people to think he and his brother are just “a pair”), Buford...uh...something with Buford definitely, because I love him and he deserves it. Heck, maybe even the Fireside Girls can have their own arc with a graduation ceremony for their ranks (...what? I’m not linking stuff to the best fanfic ever, noooooo...why would-why would I do that?).

And maybe in this case Plot B SHOULD be different - maybe it should focus on how Doofenshmirtz first got to America, how he first met Charlene, what exactly led him to being evil in the first place, all that good stuff. Though, ultimately, that might be a little angsty - maybe there’s a reason why we don’t see exactly HOW Doof and Charlene divorced, because that could very well be the saddest scene ever, and it’s hard to put that kinda comedic spin on something so tragic (I mean, obviously there are comedies CENTERED on divorce, but like...they always SKIP the divorce part from what I’ve seen). Not to mention that this is a kid’s show, so...I doubt they’d actually show HOW it happened. This is just my thoughts. X’D

Back to the Phinabella.

Phineas and Isabella would have their confession during THIS part of the special rather than the very end (so, like...they’re still in highschool, and Isabella’s already broken up with that other dude in the story, and maybe Phineas had a girlfriend he just wasn’t happy with) - Phineas tries to do something big for Isabella, but it ultimately falls through because of Perry’s current nemesis (we never see who that is, lol), so he settles for something simple (at first he’s scared about it not “being enough” for someone like Isabella, but Ferb’s able to slap that nonsense out of him pretty quickly). He and Isabella spend the ENTIRE DAY together alone, leading to Phineas eventually singing a song he wrote for her to her, and the two have a cute little duet as a result (that has the opposite energy of “What Might Have Been”, so it’s important that somewhere in this episode that “What Might Have Been” is still a thing, it just doesn’t involve Phineas being aware of Isabella’s feelings, and it doesn’t involve Isabella trying to leave somewhere without saying goodbye, this would be more about Isabella, after trying to get over her crush, realizing that she still LIKES Phineas that way). They almost kiss, but they’re ultimately interrupted by Buford being Buford or something, but it implies that Phineas and Isabella are now a couple onwards from here.

Eventually it leads to a small party in the middle of Summer with the gang, with them playing some games and talking about how by the end of Summer, they won’t be seeing each other as much anymore because of college and stuff. They all remanence about the simple times - with Isabella eventually leaving (saying it’s because she needs to check on something, but really it’s because she’s sad that things are ending so quickly and she’s gonna miss everyone especially Phineas), and Phineas going after her to see if she’s alright (he’s oblivious, but he’s always been able to tell if she’s sad for the most part, save for maybe a few instances - but he’s older now, so he’s probably better at telling).

The two go for a stroll outside, and discuss the changes and stuff, how he and Isabella are ultimately going to have to work on a long-distance relationship and how Phineas is going to miss Ferb when he leaves the country, and how he’s gonna miss Isabella. And then they both realize that everything is gonna be okay, because they’ve literally dealt with worse situations and came out stronger for it - Isabella nor Phineas have any doubts in their minds that their relationship with each other or anyone else is going to sever just because of long distance.

Time moves onward, and there are a lot of changes (mainly talking about couples and other stuff - if it were me, there’d be endgame Buford/Gretchen and Ferb/Ginger of all people, and of course Candace and Jeremy would be married by this time). Phineas and Isabella are about to go into their last year of college, and decide to spend one more day together before they, once again, go their separate ways. The gang surprises Isabella by having made an ACTUALLY GOOD AND CREATIVE BACKYARD DINNER for the two per Phineas’ planning (the idea wasn’t bad, the execution was just lame imo), and long story short, Phineas proposes to Isabella. She obviously accepts, and everyone cheers for them as Isabella inner monologues about how change can be scary but it’s okay some mushy stuff about loved ones being there for you when you need them or something.

And finally, we cut to many years later, with Isabella as an adult now, looking out at the backyard of her current home, drinking some tea - this whole movie/special has taken place in this Isabella’s memories (if that makes sense), as she thinks on how she got there. The story ends with a child (we don’t know if it’s a boy or a girl) calling to her and calling her “mom”, and Isabella leaving to check on her kid.

And...that’s how I would have written “Act Your Age”. Again, I recommend this and this over my idea (because again, their takes on this episode are perfect, I don’t think anyone can top them), but if you like it then great. This was still fun to write out and stuff, and I hope you enjoyed it regardless. ^^;