#I just wanna lie in bed lmao what's the point

[phagodyke]

homemade apple crumble (<- with fresh apples from my mums garden that she gave me to take back w me) + a smidge of pistachio ice cream (not homemade. sorry) yall wish u were me rn

[inmaki2]

luxiems reaction to a partner that’s loud in bed

req . pairing : luxiem x f!reader .

smut mdni . 2k est wc .

warnings : mocking in mystas . pull out method in lucas . uhh it’s just filth

posting b4 i sleep.. sry for taking so long with this im a slow writer + kpop blog shit LMAO

- mysta rias

your sounds are a one way ticket to shooting this man’s ego through the roof.

whenever he gets to be on top, mysta thrives in the fact that he can make you feel so good, to the point where volume has no consequence in your poor fucked out brain. of course, this doesn’t mean your boyfriend won’t be a little mean about it — it’s just how he is.

“uh, uh,” mocking the tone of your choked up sounds, mysta can’t help but snicker while his hips slam into yours. “so—“ he’s cut off when your walls squeeze him even tighter, “shit, such cute fuckin’ noises. my dick’s that good, huh slut?”

you don’t even have the strength to vocalize your embarrassment from the cruel imitation, much too preoccupied gripping the sheets for dear life. not to mention the pathetic string of drool falling from the corner of your swollen lips; open mouth allowing more squeals to escape with every thrust while the grip on your thighs tighten.

his pace never relents, even when your walls are practically suffocating him. “c-cum, please pl— ah! please, wanna cum, mysta,” you beg, voice cracking desperately.

the pleads coming from your sore throat only encourage the male to go rougher, one sleek finger rushing down to circle your puffed clit while the others lie sternly across your pelvis, harsh pressure preventing any attempts to squirm away while massaging the bulge his length leaves on your lower tummy in the process.

with you nearly spasming beneath him, mysta smiles wider. “hold it, kay? keep moaning my name louder n’ i’ll consider. let everyone know who’s fucking you this good.”

- shu yamino

it’s like a game for him — what can he do to make you even louder? theres no point in whining either, you can whimper and beg all you want, but your nerd of a boyfriend is rather strict in bed no matter how much he loves your pleas.

shu has your back pressed to his toned chest, a muscly bicep ensuring you’re immobilized by mimicking a seat belt across your waist. his free hand plunges two skillful fingers into your hole, purposely avoiding your clit for nothing but the fun of it.

even so, perhaps it’s the way he abuses that gummy spot so easily, or maybe the sloppy sounds coming from his mouth as he sucks on your shoulder — whatever it is, you simply can’t hold in your cries.

“want.. want your cock now, shu. please pl—!” a slap to your cunt along with the emptiness of his fingers’ absence has you crying out, and it takes everything in your boyfriend’s power to not groan as your ass rubs right on his bulge.

biting into your shoulder, shu tuts in disappointment. “this isn’t enough?” he lazily drags his pointer through your folds, huffing. “i thought you were my good girl.“

“i am, i am your—“ you’re cut off with another slap, yelping in a mix of delicious pleasure and pain while juices flow out from the contact.

“enough,” he spits. “good girls dont complain when they already have two fingers filling them up. they sit there, moan, and take it.” before you can reply, he’s already thrusting back into you, humming in approval when you let out a gutteral sound that can surely be heard outside the room.

“there you go, scream my name when you cum.”

though you can barely think, you use your last bit of strength to mumble out, “do— do i get your dick after?”

this has shu letting out a chuckle even while his fingers are curling into your walls, and you swear you see the tip of his ears turn a shy red. “sure, princess. s’long as you keep those pretty moans up.”

- ike eveland

yes, your boyfriend loves the variety of sounds he can emit from you, but god it stresses him out sometimes.

ike is not up for sharing nor exhibitionism, the mere thought of anyone else hearing or knowing what the two of you are up to has him pausing anxiously, even when the blissful feeling of your thighs suffocating him flourishes. he occasionally wonders how your throat manages such strain, even more so when you nearly howl from the way his lips suck around your most sensitive area.

despite your body weight crushing him, ike manages to pull off for a second to breathe. “no..” you complain, hands rushing to tug him back by the fluffy grey hair tickling your thighs.

“don’t worry, i’ll give you what you want, y/n,” he reassures, pretty face red and sweaty. “but try to stay quiet for me.”

“s’ hard..” almost teasingly, ike’s tongue is swiftly back to licking up your juices, two pale arms hooking around your thighs to ensure you’re fully sitting right on him. his prior request diminishes, in fact, the opposite only occurs.

everytime his tongue pushes into your hole, his nose bumps your clit so perfectly — not to mention the vibration coming from his own sounds against your cunt, hurriedly sending you over the edge. “geez, i say be quiet and you only get louder. bad girl.”

you’ve pretty much tuned him out at this point of your high, which ike catches onto rather quickly. though to your luck, your boyfriend is feeling merciful. “go on— mmh, just cum. as long as you’re ready to get gagged after while i fuck you.”

- vox akuma

well aren’t you just made for this man? being loud himself, vox very much appreciates your openness to matching his volume whether it be intentional or not. his ego is skyrocketing as is, but every time you scream his name, it feels as though something goes off in his brain, resembling a mental pat on the back that has his cock twitching.

“fuuuck, cunt’s squeezing me so damn tight. keep moaning like that, baby.” contradictingly, the man presses your face further into the mattress, plowing his length into you from behind at a dauntingly fast pace. it may sound strange, but vox thinks you look cute suffering underneath him like this.

you aren’t even sure if it’s tears or drool staining the sheets, but the bubbling feeling of embarrassment encourages you to finally purse your lips and stop the erotic noises circling your bedroom.

however, your boyfriend freezes, seemingly accepting this as a challenge.

his hips cease movement almost completely with only the tip poking your entrance, a graceful hand running up your sides as he whispers. “oh? what’s this?” suddenly, you feel yourself being pulled up, two fingers turning your chin to come face-to-face with a sinister sneer. “going quiet on me?”

“milord..” as you attempt to speak, your jaw is forced open wider before a glob of saliva is dropped onto your vulnerable tongue.

“swallow,” vox hisses. you comply seconds later even though your cheeks are burning red, body involuntarily squirming in pathetic attempts to run from the length slowly sheathing back inside. “good girl.”

when he’s an inch or two from bottoming out, he pulls your hips back onto him, ejecting a chocked yelp from your mouth at the feeling of him hitting that gummy spot. vox only laughs in response. “so cute.. thinking you can hide those pretty sounds from me.” an offended tch leaves his lips. “do that again and you’re not cumming tonight, m’kay darling?”

- luca kaneshiro

luca’s main goal in bed is just to please you as much as he can, so being loud does nothing but make him feel pride and act as a sign that he’s doing well — especially now when he’s putting all his strength into making you both reach bliss.

legs wrapped tightly around his waist, you let out a groan as his cock plunges into you harshly, the girth and length making your eyes squeeze shut by the fullness. “please luca..”

he grunts, sweat rolling down his face and onto yours. “what- what are you begging for now?” the blonde moves one hand down to your chest, pinching your nipple playfully.

“harder!”

“harder?” luca parrots, a mischievous smirk rising across his cheeks. who was he to say no? “don’t complain if you can’t walk tomorrow.”

regardless of his warning, he quickly obliges, snickering at how a strangled moan is forced out of you with each prod. luca is certainly aware of the racket you’re making, but noise complaints are his last concern when he gets a front row seat to your eyes rolling back into your skull. “jesus, you’re loud. gonna— shit, gonna squirt all over me babe?”

you can only nod in response, hands pathetically gripping strong biceps while his fingers move down to press the bulge on your tummy. before you can make another move he’s pulling you into a kiss, swallowing your sounds right as your impending orgasm washes over you. luca groans himself from the way your walls spasm, struggling to even pull out with your legs caging him in.

eventually he’s releasing all over your swollen cunt and stomach, groaning in satisfaction at his work while flopping down next to you. “hey y/n.”

“what, luca?”

“i think that’s one of the loudest i’ve ever got you. top three at least.”

you open one eye in disbelief, making eye contact with the same idiot who just fucked your insides up. “is everything a competition to you?”

“i’m just saying!”

if u want me to write more make sure to reblog/send asks and tell me if u enjoyed !!!!!

nkox 2023 - do not copy, translate, crosspost, etc.

[basketonthedoorstepofthefbi]

"obstinate, headstrong girl" part 2 - aaron hotchner x fem!reader

read part 1 here

wc: 3000

cw: mentions of food and alcohol! enemies to lovers! poorly researched medical information lmao i am a liberal arts girly i just need it for the plot. typical bau meddling, reader is lowkey a bully but dw bc hotch is still a little bitch, part 3 to come c: 

a/n big fat thank you to my bestie @cerisereids for all her help workshopping / brainstorming with me! i also got the BEAUTIFUL dividers from the immensely talented @saradika-graphics

You. 

With your red dress and your attitude, throwing back amaretto sours like they’re tequila shots - who gets drunk on amaretto sours? They’re basically safe to drink while pregnant. To be fair, you didn’t get sloppy, or even really that drunk. By the end of the night, your eyes appeared just a bit heavy, like someone had tied miniature weights to your eyelashes. 

Your eyelashes. Aaron had never found eyelashes, of all things, to be attractive, but here he is, in the middle of a work day with a report half-finished (and half-assed, at that), and he’s thinking about your eyelashes. 

He’s thought of basically every part of you already today. Your knees, your dress, what’s underneath it. You have been sucking him into a black hole all day long, and he’s to the point where he’s halfway wishing for a serial killer so he can focus on something else. 

He plows his hand through his dark hair, shaking off the overwhelming thoughts of you. He checks the silver Rolex on his wrist. It’s nearly time to leave. Aaron doesn’t usually do this, but he decides to leave this report for tomorrow, when he can look at the letters on the page and not see your face, hear your voice. 

Just as he starts packing up, there’s a knock on his open office door. Aaron’s dark eyes flicker up to see Garcia standing in the doorway, Morgan’s tall frame looming behind her. “Hotch, you got anything going on tonight?” 

Aaron shakes his head. For once, he actually doesn’t. “Jack’s at a sleepover,” he says. “What’s up?” 

“We’re taking Spence and Jacqueline to this nighttime vendor market thingy,” Penelope says, scrunching her nose up with a smile. “You remember Jacqueline?” 

It’s been a week since Derek’s birthday, when Jacqueline and Spencer were introduced. More relevantly, since Aaron laid eyes on you. “I remember.” 

“You wanna come with us?” Penelope asks with bright eyes. Aaron opens his mouth the decline almost immediately, but Penelope beats him to it. “Y/N’s not coming.” 

Aaron arches a brow. “What makes you think I care if Y/N’s coming or not?” he asks. 

“Oh, c’mon, Hotch,” Derek puts all his weight on the doorjamb. “We saw you staring at her at my birthday. It’s about time you moved on from Haley, any-”

“If I say I’ll come out, will you stop talking?” Aaron cuts him off, grabbing his briefcase. 

Derek ponders this for a second, even looks to Penelope as if to ask permission. He shrugs his shoulders in what Aaron suspects will be the first little white lie of the evening. “Yeah.” 

How anyone was able to sprain their ankle while shopping for books is beyond you. Leave it to Jacqueline, the wide-eyed, quirkily clumsy ingénue of her very own romantic comedy, to trip over a curb while gazing starry-eyed at the oh-so dreamy Dr. Reid. She called you from the emergency room with a shrill panic lining her voice, and you immediately leapt up from the couch. You didn’t even bother pausing your show on the TV, just slid some shoes on, grabbed your bag, and bolted out the door. 

You’re taking extra long strides, your flip-flops smacking obnoxiously against the linoleum tiles of the hospital floor. When you spot Jacqueline sitting up in the bed, still in her own clothes, you feel instant relief. At least she’s not panicking anymore. Spencer sits diligently by her side, fidgeting with the edges of the sheets. Jacqueline’s right leg is elevated atop several pillows, with a meek smile on her face once her eyes meet yours. 

“Spencer, you’re supposed to keep an eye on her at all times,” you joke with a weak laugh, sighing as you plop down in the empty chair beside Spencer’s. 

“She saw something shiny and wandered off,” Spencer shrugs, and Jacqueline glares at the both of you. 

“This whole talking about me like I’m not here, thing? Not my favorite,” she deadpans. There’s the Jacqueline you know and love. In crowded social settings, she can be reclusive and difficult to open up. But with only a few people around - especially people she’s comfortable around - Jacqueline is a completely different person. 

You’re glad she feels comfortable around Spencer after just a week of knowing him. They’re not even officially dating, per se, but tonight they went out with Penelope and Derek to test the waters. You think it’s cute - like two fifth-graders on a chaperoned outing to the movies, with their parents sitting a row behind them. 

You were invited to tag along, but you didn’t want to be the fifth wheel. You also were having a really long, insufferable week, and you simply needed some recharge time. So you politely declined. 

“Oh, shush, you’ve got bigger fish to fry,” you tell Jacqueline playfully, eyes darting down to her elevated foot. “So, what’s the damage?” 

“Sprained ankle, possibly fractured,” Spencer rattles off. “Usually an x-ray isn’t required, but since Jacqueline’s having pain in her malleolar zone - that is, the top part of the ankle that connects to the tibia - the doctor ordered one. We’re waiting on the results to come back, but I think they’ll just put her in a brace for a few weeks. Statistically speaking, only about 15% of sprained ankles result in significant bone fractures.” 

You release an awkward little chuckle, very nearly overwhelmed by the amount of information Spencer just dumped on you. Jacqueline shrugs her shoulders a little, like this is just how he is, and I love it. 

You blink a few times as you absorb all of Spencer’s ramblings. “So.. she’s gonna be fine?” 

“Yeah, she’ll be fine,” Spencer cracks a smile, and his thumb brushes affectionately over the top of Jacqueline’s hand. Your friend blushes furiously, ever-so-clearly under the fluorescent lighting. 

“So what exactly happened?” You ask. 

Before either of them get to answer, imposing footsteps grow louder, and you hear a familiar voice say, “Okay, coffee acquired.”

Smooth like the neat whiskey he was throwing back the night you met him, Aaron’s voice drags down your spine. Your belly does acrobatic flips. You visibly tense up for a second before turning around to see Aaron with a cardboard drink carrier in his hand containing three to-go cups of coffee. 

“Oh, hi, Y/N. When did you get here?” Aaron’s voice goes flat, and he meets your eyes civilly. 

“While you were getting coffee, I presume,” you deadpan, and you swear you see one of those imposing brown eyes twitch. 

“Right,” Aaron hands Jacqueline her coffee, and then has to lean over you so he can give Spencer his. You catch whiffs of pine and espresso and dark leather. His chest is basically in your face for a solid three seconds. God, he’s broad. He’s also in a suit, save for the jacket and tie, and your eyes catch the crinkly lines in his white dress shirt, no longer crisp from being worn all day. They look like rivers on a map. “Well, I guess I’ll be going. Glad you’re okay, Jacqueline, that was quite the fall.” 

“Oh, no, Aaron, you don’t have to go!” Jacqueline pipes up, holding her coffee with two hands. “I mean, only if you need to, but, we’re still waiting for my X-ray to come back, and I know I’d love the company.” 

You look at Jacqueline with a bewildered expression. “I mean, I’d love the company of all of you,” Jacqueline corrects, her cheeks pinkening. 

You cross your ankles, suddenly aware that you’re in your loungewear - beige linen shorts and a blue Georgetown sweatshirt - and your hair sits in a haphazard knot on top of your head. You have to remind yourself that you don’t care. That Aaron Hotchner’s opinion of you does not matter. 

Aaron seems momentarily frozen in place, standing at the foot of Jacqueline’s bed. His eyes dart to you as if to silently ask permission to stay, and you give a subtle, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it shrug and tilt of your head. He inhales and you see his nostrils flare. He clears his throat and says, “Let me find a chair, then.” 

There’s something humorous about a man as tall and imposing and draconian as Aaron Hotchner looking for a chair in the emergency room bay of a hospital. Shoulders hunched so he doesn’t inconvenience anyone. You hope he feels embarrassed and humbled by the experience. A muted smirk rests upon your lips as you watch him most unhelpfully, not even bothering to move from your seat. 

Eventually he finds a free chair in the corner and drags it to the other side of Jacqueline’s bed, keeping a respectful distance. He looks across the bed at Spencer, who sits beside you. “Did you tell her that Garcia basically pushed Jacqueline over the curb?” 

Fluorescent lighting had never been so flattering before. Under its clarifying spotlight, Aaron gets to see details of you he’d missed at the bar where you first met. The texture of your skin, an extra little sliver of thigh from those linen shorts he wasn’t privy to before. 

And when he leaned over you to give Reid his coffee? He caught your intoxicating scent and now he fears it will either be stuck in his nostrils forever, or it will fade too quickly, before he can commit it to memory. 

“Penelope did what?” You’re asking, looking at Reid, then Jacqueline, brows creasing in the middle. 

Aaron folds his left leg atop his right, then nods with an amused smile. It’s clear you still don’t like him - might even hate him for how cold he was to you at the bar the other night. He can tell by the way you refuse to look at him unless absolutely necessary, how your jaw visibly tenses every time he addresses you directly. 

“I have no solid proof,” Aaron begins, offering the information as an olive branch. Your eyes snap to his and he’s jarred for a second, then he continues, the corners of his lips ticking up into an amused smile. “But one second, I see Garcia and Morgan at least three feet behind where Jacqueline’s walking, and the next thing I know, she’s on the ground and Garcia’s apologizing profusely.” 

“Why isn’t she here?” You laugh softly, and Aaron’s chest thrums. He can’t diagnose his reaction to it, but your laugh, no matter how strained and merely polite it might be at this moment, could be the thing that kills him. 

“Something about feeding JJ and Emily’s cat while they’re on vacation,” Jacqueline chimes in. Aaron clocks the younger woman’s eyes and how glued they are on Reid. She’s been so closed off every time Aaron’s around, so this tidbit of information coming from her surprises him. Aaron’s wondered this whole time if she truly likes Reid or if she’s just being kind. 

You nod in understanding and lean back in your chair. Little wisps of your hair fall into your eyes and you brush them back delicately with your index finger. 

Jacqueline pipes up again, her voice still timid and maybe a little tired. “Would you mind maybe getting me a snack?” She asks you. 

Aaron watches the softening of your expression as you look at Jacqueline fondly. You would do anything for her, and he can tell. “Of course,” you squeeze Jacqueline’s uninjured leg as you rise from your seat. 

“And maybe Aaron can go with you? Since Spence is pretty hungry, too, right, Spence?” Jacqueline proposes. 

Your soft expression twists into one of slight irritance. 

Aaron knows exactly what Jacqueline is up to, but it takes Reid a lingering moment to catch on. “What - oh, yeah, I’m starving,” the good doctor adds, even going to far as to pat his stomach, as if to say it’s hollow in there. 

Your eyes shrink in annoyance, and you seem to plaster a sickly sweet smile onto your lips, one that would make demons shake in their boots. You lock eyes with Aaron, as if to say, well? What’s it gonna be? 

Aaron asks Jacqueline and Reid what they want, then leads the way out of the ER and towards the cafeteria. The hospital’s signage is fairly easy to follow, and Aaron slows his usually long strides so you don’t have to struggle to keep up.

He gestures to your Georgetown sweatshirt. “You graduated from Georgetown?” He asks. 

“No, I just like to wear merchandise for schools I didn’t attend,” you deadpan, and there’s that goddamn attitude again. 

Aaron considers laying it all out - right here, right now. You’re not even thirty yet, from what Garcia’s told him. He shouldn’t be attracted to you, but he is, and god, is it killing him. Instead, he just furrows his brows and doesn’t say anything. 

“Yeah,” you soften a little, shoving your hands in the pockets of the sweatshirt. You seem to be cutting Aaron a little bit of slack, for whatever reason. “Yeah, I went to Georgetown.” 

Aaron holds the door open for you when you reach the cafeteria. You feel a little bad for your snarky comment in the hallway. You were not raised to be outwardly rude. You were raised to hoard your resentment like a precious flower, nursing it so it grows big and strong. 

“Jacqueline made it really sound like an emergency, huh?” Aaron asks, following you to the line. You shoot him a quizzical brow, and he gestures to your ensemble. 

“Oh, excuse me for not wearing an Armani suit to the hospital,” you roll your eyes, but they linger on the wrinkles in his dress shirt. “You just went out right after work, then? In your fancy suit?” 

Aaron smooths his fingertips over the white cotton. The color reminds you of freshly cleaned bedsheets. “Yeah, and it’s not Armani, for your information.” 

“Sorry, Mr. FBI. What is it, then, Dolce & Gabbana? Ralph Lauren?” 

“Tom Ford.” 

“Like that’s any less pretentious,” you scoff. 

“Hey, I can spend my money however I choose,” Aaron says, and you know he’s right. That doesn’t mean you’re not going to give him shit for it. 

“Must be nice to just burn cash,” you say dryly. “I’m sure your wife loves that.” 

“I don’t have a wife.” You look at him over your shoulder and his eye twitches a little when he says this. 

You’re not sure why you mention a wife anyway. Maybe you’re merely curious, but then again, you’ve already clocked that he’s not wearing a wedding ring. “Girlfriend, then,” you correct. “Do men your age call them girlfriends, or do you prefer the term mistress?” 

“Men my age?” Aaron laughs bitterly. “I don’t have a girlfriend,” he says. His voice is stringent, right on the line of annoyance. You smirk to yourself and grab a tray so you can carry the food. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t call her my mistress, because I don’t have a wife to cheat on with her.” 

“Bachelors in the 1800s called their girlfriends mistresses,” you point out, though your facts are coming from Bridgerton, so you’re not sure if they’re entirely accurate. “I don’t know how old-fashioned you are.” 

“I’m not,” Aaron says simply as you load an individual-size veggie pizza on your tray for Jacqueline, then grab a bag of chips and a soda for yourself. Aaron grabs the sandwich Spencer requested, and you lead the way to the checkout. 

The cafeteria worker punches in your items, and then Aaron’s. “Oh, we’re not together,” you correct politely. 

“It’s fine,” Aaron insists, pulling a silver AmEx out of his wallet. You reach for your own wallet to try and beat him, but he’s already swiped by the time you even get it out. 

You thank the cafeteria worker before gathering everything in your hands. “You didn’t have to do that,” you say as you and Aaron head out of the cafeteria. He holds the door open for you, again. 

“It’s not a big deal,” Aaron says as you walk through the open door. “Chivalry is still alive, as far as I’m concerned.” 

“Not old-fashioned, huh?” You smirk as you look up at him, feeling your cheeks redden a bit. Wait, when did this become playful jesting rather than straight-up bullying? 

“Maybe a little old-fashioned.” Aaron’s lips hint at a smile, and you feel your mouth go dry. 

“Shocking that you’re still on the market,” you say, admittedly because you’re curious about what Penelope said the other night at the bar. Something about Aaron going through a hard time. 

“My job requires a lot of my time,” Aaron explains. Your footsteps slow a little and he matches your pace. “Even if I found someone worth all the trouble, I don’t think I’d have the time to dedicate to a relationship.” 

“Worth all the trouble?” You repeat, a scoff lining your voice like a thousand tiny needles. Aaron resists the urge to visibly wince at your reaction. 

Why you’re prompting all this relationship discussion is beyond him. He’s a profiler, for Christ’s sake, but he can’t pin you down, for some reason. He lays the brickwork down and builds his walls up again. For a moment, back in the cafeteria, he was starting to let you in. 

But, no, it doesn’t matter how god-forsakenly adorable you are when you scrunch your nose or call him out on his bullshit. Aaron’s not ready for this kind of thing yet, so iciness is necessary. It protects him, it protects Jack, but - and, maybe most importantly - it protects you. 

You’re young and you’re willful. You’re a goddamn hurricane, a force to be reckoned with, but your stubbornness is a house of cards. Aaron Hotchner knows that if he hurts you, the cards will fall. And he could never forgive himself for something like that. 

So when you look at him for some kind of explanation, throwing him an arched brow and the opportunity to explain himself, he doesn’t take it. Instead, he watches as you pick up your pace and walk ahead of him, leaving a hell of a view and a frustrated, fully-grown man in your wake.

[futurecorps3]

can i request a jj x reader where she keeps saying she's sick but jj doesnt believe it and thinks it's just an excuse to not go to the midsummers or whatever u choose, but then when they both go, she passes out and jj gets worried and protective. thank uuu smm!!

𝐑𝐮𝐬𝐞

Masterlist<3

Summary: JJ thinks you're lying Pairing: JJ Maybank x kook!reader Warnings: JJ kind of being an ass lmao, sickness, mentions of headaches, reader faints and I think that's it, lmk if I missed any! Word Count: 2.6K Requested: Yes

A/N: Took me a while to figure this one out cause I think J wouldn't be like that in the first place but let's try!! Hope u like, nonnie<3

Everything sucked. There was no way a human could have this bad luck, and Y/N had begun to think the universe had it against her at this point. She had spent almost a month finding the perfect dress and headpiece for Midsummers' night, two months in convincing her parents to let her bring JJ as her plus one and a solid three weeks in convincing JJ.

Only for a mind bending migraine to come storming its way right in the morning. She tried ignoring it for a while, taking some pain-killers to try to ease the pain, but they did absolutely nothing. Her parents had left early to help the Camerons set everything up (sitting around and ordering people) and the party started around five, so she opted for sleeping to see if the headache would subside.

It didn't; she realized right when JJ's booming voice rang through her ears, waking her up. "Figured I'd come down here so we could get ready together!" Her boyfriend said with a grin, holding the tuxedo she had bought for him in his arms. She incorporated from her bed. Standing up with a little dizziness, she couldn't let slide and kissed him as a greeting.

"For an event, it took me days to convince you to go to, you truly are excited." Y/N smiled, feeling a little light-headed. "Did you shower?" She asked as she buried her head in his chest as JJ's arms wrapped around her waist "'Course mamma, just for you... but by the looks of it you haven't" he smiled as his girlfriend hit his chest playfully.

"You're right though, be right back". Y/N stepped in her bathroom as she heard JJ play some music on her speaker. Hopefully, the shower would help the pain she could no longer stand. She tried massaging her scalp and breathe in the scents of her soaps, relax in the water and whatnot but it didn’t help.

She felt as if someone was pushing her eyeballs into the inside her skull while pounding the sides of her head with a hammer, the worst migraine she ever had. Now, this whole thing was important for both Y/N and JJ, as it was the first time they’d be attending an event of this nature together… but she wasn’t sure the headache would allow her.

The thought made her sulk a little, but in the end, the migraine was stronger. She stepped out of the shower wrapped in a towel as well as her hair, watching JJ play around with her necklaces and rings. “J, I-I don’t think we can go” she muttered, disappointment clear in her shaking voice when she noticed how his face fell.

“What do you mean?” he sounded almost shocked. “My head’s been hurting like a motherfucker since I woke up, I-I tried taking some painkillers but they worked for shit and-“ “Y/N you ain’t gotta lie… just say you don’t wanna go with me”.

She couldn’t bear thinking JJ thought it had to do with him “Baby no, I-I’m serious! We could stay in and cuddle if you want, maybe watch Top Gun or-“ then he laughed. “Stop pretending”

“What?” “I know you don’t want me to meet all your kook friends and I know you're kind of ashamed of dating me even though you say you aren’t and-“ “What are you talking about!?”

This was a very JJ thing to think. And no, he wasn’t being manipulative. Y/N knew he meant every word he was saying. And that’s what hurt the most. He could get insecure and honestly, she couldn’t blame him. He grew up in a place that condemned him for the blood running through his veins, hearing things like “he’s just like his old man” or “a Maybank after all” when he fucked up.

Yes, he was reckless and stupid, but he was also kind and a good man. Y/N knew he had some reservations coming into this entire relationship with her because being friends differed completely from being boyfriend and girlfriend. The judgments they were to face were clear, but she always reassured him that as long as they were together they’d be okay.

She could see why he’d think that way. “It’s not like that, baby-“ “Except it is” he said, running his hands through his hair and pacing around the room. “Let’s go then” she gave in. Physical pain hurt way more than knowing JJ thought she was embarrassed to be dating him. She could handle it.

“Oh, so suddenly your headache goes away?” He snapped, throwing air quotes in the word headache which made Y/N, who was already getting her hair done, give him a look of “drop it” and he did, kissing her in the cheek before changing into his suit.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

When they got there, Y/N’s headache was nowhere near better, but she tried paying no mind to it; what mattered was she was walking down to the party with JJ holding her hand. She squeezed his fingers gently as they approached her parents; him squeezing her's back.

“Hi sweetie!” My mom smiles, hugging her tightly with the sweetest grin and then moves to hug her boyfriend. “JJ, we’re so glad you could make it! Go ahead to our table. It’s four over there and I made sure to seat you with Sarah and Kie”. The woman was always kind to J, making sure he felt welcomed in their lives.

Who was really hard to convince was her dad, always wary of the boys Y/N brings home. Now, him being a pogue well… that stir shit up to say the least. “Thank you” the boy answered her mom, then turning to her dad. “Hello, sir”. Her dad gave JJ a stern look and held out his hand “Hello JJ”. And that was it for him.

As they were walking to their table, Y/N realized her boyfriend’s face fell a little at the interaction with her dad. “Hey hey, it’s okay… you know how he gets,” she quickly assured and he directed those sad blue eyes to her “I just don’t get why he doesn’t like me” he sighed, a sad chuckle leaving his lips.

“You don’t usually care what people think of you, J. Why do yo-“ “I care because he’s your dad! I don’t care if Pope’s parents or- or Kie’s don’t like me, I couldn’t give less of a fuck but not with you. He’s your dad and as much as we know he’s unfair with me for being a pogue, I-I would like him to like me”

Y/N’s heart broke at his words, making her feet stop next to the dancefloor, her headache pulsating at the strong wave of emotions. “We can’t make him like you but when we get married…” JJ laughed at that, placing big hands around her waist and smiling “When we get married, he’ll realize I couldn’t wish for a better person to be with me forever. Because you love me, and I love you.” She grinned, pecking his nose to then resume their way to their seats.

When a waiter approached them and Y/N ordered water instead of some champagne, JJ looked at her funny. "Water? Who are you? Kie?" He joked, the aforementioned throwing a small napkin to his head "At least I'm not going to die of some weird liver disease like you J!" Kiara countered, giggling slightly. "I told you I'm not feeling well" Y/N mumbled, and before he could say anything, she joined Sarah and Kie's conversation.

As the conversations flowed and laughter filled the air, Y/N valiantly pushed through the discomfort, not wanting her condition to dampen the joyous occasion. Engaging in lighthearted banter with her friends, she managed to mask the underlying pain she felt. Yet, behind her radiant smile, an unrelenting throbbing persisted, casting a shadow on her otherwise vibrant spirit.

As Y/N's voice intertwined with the playful chatter, a sudden surge of dizziness overwhelmed her senses. Her head felt heavy, as if wrapped in a dense fog, and her vision blurred around the edges. The familiar pain that had been nagging her intensified, clawing at her temples.

She desperately clung to the facade of normalcy, but her body betrayed her resilience. Y/N's grip on the conversation faltered, her words becoming muddled as her mind struggled to keep pace. Her friends noticed the change in her demeanor, a fleeting flicker of concern crossing their faces. "You 'kay Y/N/N?" John B asked.

In that moment, Y/N's world seemed to spin out of control. Sensations of disorientation and weakness cascaded through her body, leaving her feeling adrift and vulnerable. The sounds of her friends' voices morphed into a distant echo, as if they were calling to her from a great distance.

The once vibrant party faded into the background, overshadowed by the overwhelming intensity of Y/N's migraine. Her focus narrowed to a single point of struggle, her every instinct urging her to find solace and relief from the torment that gripped her. "Baby?" She heard JJ mumble as her consciousness teetered on the precipice. Y/N's body succumbed to the overpowering sensations, causing her to lose consciousness.

A profound stillness enveloped Y/N as she drifted away, suspended in a momentary limbo between wakefulness and oblivion. Time became a fleeting concept, and the outside world ceased to exist for those brief moments.

In that suspended state, Y/N's body rested, unaware of the commotion that unfolded around her. JJ held her full weight in his arms, shock written all over his features. "Y/N! Baby, wake up!" he hopelessly pleads, the attention of the nearby tables focusing entirely on him. Kiara rushed over to her as well as Sarah and John, all in a frenzy, knowing nothing of what was going on.

"John, go get the twinkie! Ambulances will take a while to come to this side of the island." JJ hurried, feeling everyone's gaze on him but caring only for the peaceful look on his girlfriend's face. John B nodded and left quickly to get the van as close as he could. Then, guilt came rushing through J's veins like injected adrenaline; this was hois fault.

Y/N had tried to tell him she wasn't feeling okay, but he was too petty and way more inside his head when she was just being honest. He felt a sting in his eyes and as soon as he blinked; the tears stained Y/N's dress. "I'm so sorry baby" he whispered, Sarah and Kie looking puzzled at him asking for forgiveness at a time like this.

"JJ, this is not your fault" the blonde said, rubbing his back reassuringly but before she could continue, he began shaking his head "Y-You don't understand, she told me her head was hurting but-but I was stupid and thought she didn't wanna be seen with me and-" a sob interrupted his sentence, making Kie hug him tightly. "It's still not your fault".

He cried for a few more seconds, holding Y/N close so he could feel her still steady heartbeat against his ear until John B came rolling down in the twinkie. JJ noticed Y/N's dad approaching when he lifted up his girlfriend, but he needed to get her to the hospital quick. "I'll get her to the hospital sir, meet you there," He said in a panic, his friends and him getting in the van and speeding off to the emergency room.

He felt his heart sink as John drove and he could notice Y/N's breath quicken, then falter. JJ rarely felt guilt, but this was the way the universe was punishing him, he figured. "Hurry" he mumbled, knowing his best friend was doing his best not to crash while getting his girl to the hospital as soon as he could.

Eventually they got there. Everything from when the car stopped to him sitting next to her bed was a blur for JJ; he had a vague memory of the doctors saying she passed out from the migraine and dehydration, nothing fatal but if JJ hadn't been there to catch her when she blacked out it could've caused a concussion.

The pogues stayed there against the professional's advice, saying they should go home and sleep, that Y/N would be awake by morning and they would be able to talk to her then. They refused. Kie and Pope (who got there as soon as he heard the news) cuddled on a couch. Sarah and John did the same as JJ just sat next to Y/N's bed, holding her hand.

The doctors instructed her boyfriend to give her water as soon as she woke up and notify a nurse that would help her immediately, but in the meantime, all they could do was wait. Her parents walked in to find a room of teenagers sleeping at around eleven. Her mom woke JJ up so he could fill them in.

"Mrs. Y/L/N... hi" he sleepily mumbled, rearranging the wild mess his hair was by brushing it back to later rub the sleep out of her face. Her father was standing behind her with an angry expression, and before Y/N's mother could speak, he approached JJ menacingly. "You explain to me right this second why you didn't ask me what was to be done as soon as she passed out! We were so-" the man whisper yelled so the others wouldn't wake up.

"I'm sorry sir, and with all due respect, I could not care less about what you thought would be appropriate other than bringing her to the hospital. I couldn't care less about how you both were feeling; she needed help, and she needed it right that second. I'm sorry if I crossed any boundaries but, as you would be able to tell if you gave me a chance, I have no limit when it comes to your daughter's well being" JJ declared, not once getting his eyes off Y/N's dad.

And he was telling the truth, too. He would go to the ends of earth for her and if her being safe meant her dad would hate him more, it was okay for him. Suddenly, Y/N's mother engulfed him in a tight hug. "She couldn't be with someone better than you. We're just glad she's safe and to know our girl is with someone who will look after her. Thank you, JJ" she smiled.

He smiled wide, returning the hug. "No problem, ma'am. The doc said she'd be just fine. Apparently she had a migraine and hadn't drunk enough water... we're all just waiting for her to wake up". When the blonde raised his eyes to the man behind her, there was something different. Respect, maybe. He didn't really care in this moment.

Her parents stayed in some chairs outside, and, at around midnight, Y/N woke up. JJ was the first one to notice when her hand moved to wrap around his finger while he mindlessly scrolled through twitter. He dropped his phone, almost falling to the ground when he tossed it somewhere as he turned to look at Y/N. "Hi, hi baby" He cooed, pretty y/e/c staring at him just like he needed "Mmm, my hero", Y/N's voice was hoarse.

JJ giggled, handing her a bottle of water and stroking her cheek softly. "I'm sorry baby, I-I should've listened to you when you tried to tell me" He sighed the apologies he repeated like a prayer hours ago "S'okay J" "It's not. Shouldn't have let my mind get in the way. I'm glad you're okay" "Yeah me too... I'm also glad to see you, baby... Dreamt about you while I was out" "As you should," he jokingly said, both of them laughing and sharing a sweet kiss.

The story after that is short. Y/N recovered, JJ was finally allowed at family dinner (and exchanged pleasant conversations with his soon to be father-in-law as he called him). ♡

˚ · • . ° .

The ending feels rushed, I'm sorry ahhhh. Tysm for reading! Hope you enjoyed

Remember, the best way to support writer’s works on here is by REBLOGGING WITH TAGS. I’d very much appreciate it if you did!

Thanks again, stranger. Hope you have a nice day<3

NO ONE IS ALLOWED TO REPOST AS THEIR OWN/TRANSLATE/OR COPY MY WORK IN ANY PLATFORM OR SPACE WITHOUT MY EXPLICIT CONSENT.

[mypoisonedvine]

Kinda dark!Neil gets jealous and very possessive over his best friend (reader) when she's dating someone. They end up arguing, he calls her something bad, she slaps him and he kisses her, eventually confessing his feelings.

I got so many requests for various versions of dark neil like yall are FERAL for him and honestly? yeah. mood.

warnings: dark (obviously), manipulation, basically neil is just an asshole lmao

"I just think you can do better," he shrugged, glancing away from you. And even though you'd probably heard it a thousand times, for some reason that one was the last straw.

"I wish you'd just say it, Neil," you spat at him, getting his attention again with a raised eyebrow. "I wish you'd just say what you're obviously getting at."

"What?" he denied, scoffing.

"You know, Craig thinks that you're--"

"Oh, fucking Craig," he rolled his eyes, "god forbid we forget for one second what Craig think-- cause Craig is sooo smart, right?"

"Shut up," you frowned. "You know, if you were really my friend, you'd just be supportive."

"If I was really your friend?" Neil repeated. "What's that mean? What am I if not your friend?"

"I-I-- well--" you stammered, trying again to say it but losing your nerve.

Neil scoffed, crossing his arms as he gave you this nasty, smug kind of smile. "You tell me to just say it, but you can't even say it yourself," he noticed. "You're not that tough, you know."

You pouted a little, looking down at the floor.

"I am your friend," he promised, "but I don't wanna be."

You nervously looked up at him, not sure what that meant, and found him stepping closer.

"I'm guessing Craig told you that-- he's an idiot, but I guess he's not completely oblivious..." Neil sighed, stepping closer to you again-- making you start to step back a little. "I don't wanna just be your friend. There, I said it."

"Wh-what do you want?" you asked, even though the answer was pretty obvious now-- you were still hoping he might give a different answer.

"I want you," he said, and your heart jumped as he stepped closer. "I always wanted you."

"N-Neil, you don't mean that," you breathed.

"I've never meant anything like I mean that," he assured. "And you can lie to yourself or to fucking Craig all you want-- but I know you want me, too."

"God, I defended you," you remembered with wide eyes, "Craig said you were just trying to get into my pants, and I defended you. I can't believe he was right..."

"Did you really not know?" Neil laughed a little. "Sometimes I thought it was obvious."

"No, I didn't know! I trusted you!" you yelped.

"Well, Jesus-- you make it sound like I did something awful," he laughed thinly, "it's not a crime to fall for your best friend."

"But all this time, and you never told me," you sighed, "were you just... waiting? Thinking I'd eventually fall into bed with you?"

"I mean..." Neil stalled awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck, and you groaned as you rolled your eyes.

"God, you're such a creep!"

He frowned, glaring at you a bit. "Listen, I'm sorry you're so goddamn disappointed, but you don't have to be such a bitch--"

Instantly you put your hand up-- it was pure instinct at that point-- but before you could hit him across the face, he grabbed your wrist and clicked his tongue at you disapprovingly.

"Don't do that," he warned you. "Don't be like that."

"Neil, let go," you whimpered, trying to tug your hand away, but he just grabbed your hip and pulled you into him. His eyes met yours before trailing down to your lips, his own sighing for a moment.

"I wanted you so bad," he said again, softer, "for so long. Enough to drive a guy crazy, you know-- being around you all the time and never having you."

"Neil, please," you whispered back, eyes welling with tears. "Just let me go, please."

"Not until you admit that you wanted this, too," he replied, and you shook your head as you bit your shaking lip.

He frowned again, finally letting go of your wrist and holding your cheek instead.

"We're so much better for each other," he insisted, "I'll take such good care of you, angel. Why won't you just let me do that, huh?"

Instead of giving you time to respond, he suddenly pressed his lips to yours; he held your head when you tried to pull back, forcing you to stay close against him as he hummed quietly against you. You tried to push harder on his shoulders, but he only tilted his head and deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue into the opening created by your gasp of protest.

He seemed to think if he just forced it on you long enough, you'd succumb to it, and he got frustrated when he didn't work. He slipped his hand around your neck, tightening it just enough to threaten you with something worse. "Kiss me," he ordered you under his breath, and you felt like you had to at this point for your safety. Struggling to put any real passion into it as your heart raced with fear, you shut your eyes and finally kissed him back; he moaned a little, you even felt him smile and hold you tighter.

You broke away enough to speak again. "We can't-- Neil, this isn't okay," you stammered out.

"It's fine," he promised dismissively as he leaned in again, "I won't tell him."

"N-no, fuck, I don't mean--" you groaned, but you were interrupted when Neil pressed his hips to yours and you felt the bulge in his jeans. "F-fuck, Neil--"

"See what you do to me?" he grinned. "Sorry, I just can't help it-- I swear I'm hard half the time that I'm with you, you're just so cute."

"Are you fucking serious?" you sneered at him.

"You're even cuter when you're angry with me," he laughed, easily pushing your hand away when you tried to hit him again. "C'mon, don't fight me, angel-- please don't fight me."

You were about to ask what the fuck else you were supposed to do when he was acting like this, but you were interrupted as he shoved you down onto the couch, climbing on top of you. "What the fuck are you--?!"

"Shh," he offered, kissing your neck as he started to reach up under your shirt. "Shh, hey, it's gonna be good, okay? You're gonna realize how good we are together."

"Neil, I swear, if you don't get the fuck off of me," you began, gasping as he pinned you down by your wrists.

"Please, baby," he sighed, "I just need you so bad. Okay? I need you so fucking bad I can't stand it-- you're so funny, and sweet, and sexy, and honestly I don't even deserve you, but let me try, you know?"

He really seemed to think this was some grand romantic gesture, and not the most terrifying thing you'd ever seen so up close.

"I'll give you anything you want," he promised, "I'll do anything you want--"

"Get off me."

"Other than that," he added with a little laugh. "I need to show you how much you mean to me... so please don't put up too much of a fight, okay? Because I really don't want to hurt you."

He leaned down and kissed your lips again, softer and sweeter, before kissing your cheek instead and then whispering beside your ear.

"But I will if I have to."

[sugarcoated-lame]

*no sounds just silent screams*

i like to think you tag these things then giggle knowing i’m gonna see them 🤭💗

*this contains smut, 18+ minors dni 🧡

@sebsxphia seb 💗💗💗 hello, my love! this has been sitting in my inbox for way too long, i am the worst i’m sorry for answering it so late 😭😭

but ok i’m not gonna lie… you’re so right, i literally do giggle sometimes when i reblog these things from you knowing that you’re gonna see my tags LMAO 😂🤭❤️

so that being said haha, forced eye contact with Joel…. yeah 🫠

I definitely think that soft dom Joel looooves gentle forced eye contact. Loves when you go all shy on him, your head tilting back, eyes drifting up toward the ceiling as he kneels at the edge of the bed between your parted thighs.

Strong, rough hands caressing your outer thighs as his plush lips trail sweet kisses and little love bites all along your soft skin, inching closer and closer to your core.

He soothes one of the bites with his tongue before murmuring into your skin, “What do you want, baby?”

“You-your tongue. And your fingers... please.” You just manage to squeak out between shallow, shaky breaths, already losing yourself in the feeling of his gentle touch so close to where you need him most.

Joel plants a kiss on your mound through the thin, lacy fabric of your underwear, his dark chocolatey gaze lifting to watch your expression as you shudder under his touch.

Only, he doesn’t catch your gaze when when he looks up from between your legs, finding your eyes closed and chin pointed slightly towards the ceiling — and Joel won’t have that.

Leaving its perch on your thigh, one of Joel’s big hands lifts to grab your chin. Making no attempt to move your head, but just cupping your face lightly, rough fingers lightly pressing into your skin.

"I won't do anything until you look at me, darlin’. Wanna see your pretty eyes when you tell me what you want."

The stern tone of his raspy voice has your eyes shooting open immediately, thighs clenching around his broad shoulders where he sits between them, a whimper leaving you at his commanding tone.

lashes fluttering as you tilt your head to look down to where Joel rests his head on your thigh, a bashful smile curves up on your lips when you find his steely gaze boring into you expectantly.

Leaning your head down just a bit further to drop a sweet kiss to the hand that still gently grips your chin.

“Sorry, daddy.”

And only once he knows your eyes are on him does Joel ravish you. Long, thick fingers of one hand pushing your pretty little panties to the side and pushing knuckle deep into you cunt, the other hand still gripping your chin as you moan out above him.

“Good girl. Just keep your eyes on me.” Joel commands from those pretty lips of his just before they wrap around your clit.

anyway, I need to go lie down for like 3-5 business days bc my brain is going brrrrr 😵‍💫🫠 thank you so much for sending this my dear, so sorry again for letting this sit in my inbox forever haha 😭 I hope you enjoy and ilysm!! 🥰🧡💗🧡💗

[cheeseceli]

Falling in Love [deeper than I've felt before]

Pairing: Hyunjin × gn!Reader

Genre: fluff, slowburn

Warnings: reader drinks alcohol at some point, not proofread.

Request: part 2 of Moving On but can be read individually

a/n: it took a while to go to the plot but i promise y/n moves on lmao; the ending is a bit rushed? But creativity had left me sadly. Also this was posted accidentally so I'm so sorry if there is something which seems off

The day has come. And you still can't believe how dumb you were from accepting the invitation to go to your ex's wedding.

You were going straight to the biggest heartbreak you'd ever have, but there was no turning back now. You said you would be in the damn party so you will be there.

"Seriously Y/n, I think you shouldn't go." Yeji, a friend of yours, said while helping you figure out something to wear "Just tell him that you were sick or something. I can lie to him if you want"

"I said I'd be there and I'm not one to break a promise."

"It's barely a promise. He admitted himself that it would be awkward, it's better if you skip it. You're just torturing yourself at this point"

"I'm going. Besides, maybe that's what I need to finally move on. It's been 3 years already. I need that."

Yeji sighed. She openly disagreed with your point of view, there should be another way of moving on without shattering your heart into pieces, but she wouldn't insist anymore.

"We have some hours until the wedding. Let's go to the mall, we need something good for you to wear" she got up from the edge of your bed "unless you wanna go in pajamas."

And that's how, four hours later, you were fully prepared to the wedding. Even though you looked great, you still felt a pain in your chest because of the price you spent. The situation was starting to become a little ridiculous, you couldn't believe you wasted so much money on an outfit you'd never wear again because it'd probably bring a lot of bad memories.

This better have a good outcome.

But deep inside you were happy that Yeji made you put some effort in how you'd look because the place was beautiful. The decoration was really enchanting, with a lot of white and green flowers and you could even hear the sound of a piano. It looked like the wedding was designed to fit a disney princess' movie.

The guests were also gorgeous. Some of them were still your friends while some were "ex-friends", as you lost contact with them after the break up. There were a lot of people you didn't know there, friends and family of Changbin's partner you assumed. It looked like you could actually enjoy the night if it wasn't for the current scenario.

You ended up sitting in the table with all the other Itzy girls and for some moments you were able to forget the bad feeling in your chest. That was until the ceremony started.

Needless to say that you cried during the vows. They were so happy, Changbin was happy. At the same time that your heart was aching, you felt a a weight out of your shoulders. It was like you were finally given the chance to set free from your past and not be attached to it anymore.

Changbin wouldn't come back. You shouldn't wait for him.

It was less painful than what you originally thought. Seeing how he cried after seeing his partner and how he didn't hesitate to kiss them, you could even feel happiness. I'm happy you're happy at last. That's how you were able to clap and celebrate for the now married couple, along the rest of the guests.

Now, of course, you needed to drink. Realisation was still sinking in and you couldn't say congratulations to the couple while being sober. That's why you went straight up to the bar once people started to dance and sat down in the first free chair you could find.

"Y/n?"

You looked to the side and saw Hyunjin. The fact that sooner or later one of the stray kids members would show up slipped of your mind and you were actually surprised for seeing the boy in front of you. Even though you were still friends with Changbin, you barely talked to the kids. The last time you saw Hyunjin was two years ago, you think. He got even prettier, you noticed.

"Hey" you finally reply "it's been a while."

"I know right? Wasn't expecting to see you here though."

"I wasn't supposed to be here I guess... I might be leaving soon"

It seemed that Hyunjin understood the circumstances, it was reasonable your urge to leave. But at the same time, the night had just started and it's been a pretty long time since you last talked to everyone. They missed you. He missed you.

"At least have a drink with me" he proposes, already calling the bartender "I wanna know what you've been into." How could you say no?

So you and Hyunjin drank together while catching up with each other and God, you did miss a lot. Hyunjin was talking about every show they attended to while you gossiped about a drama that was happening in your work place. He showed pictures of his paintings while you showed pictures of your pets. He even gave you a minor spoiler of their next comeback. You laughed a lot during some hours.

While you were telling him about the last trip you did with some of your friends, a different song started playing and everyone got out of the center of the room. You looked at the commotion to find out it was when the just married couple begun their dance. You were observing them, so you failed to notice Hyunjin's gaze on you and his little smile. He truly missed you.

"Are you guys okay?"

You looked at him, taking a while to understand what he meant. By the time you comprehended it, he regretted and tried saying "I'm sorry, shouldn't have asked".

"We're okay" you answered "we should be at least."

"No hard feelings? Were you able to, you know, move on?"

"I'm moving on as we speak. I think this is my last chapter with him."

He was looking at you with curiosity. Like he actually wanted to understand your feelings, like he actually wanted to listen without judgements. So you kept explaining:

"Maybe I was ready for a while, I just didn't want to let go. I've never been good with changes. I just didn't want to lose the possibility of everything being fine without any change." you grew consciously of the man's attention on you, so you tried to brush it off by laughing "Sorry for the therapy session all of the sudden."

He giggled "Don't worry, I don't mind. I'm happy for you, to be able to keep going. Happy for both of you."

The dance was close to an end and everyone was cheering, but Changbin and his partner looked like they were in their own world, lost in each others embrace and smile. You could see their love in their eyes. That's what they deserved.

"I am happy too."

You were being genuine. Its like another weight was lifted off you. You were slowly collecting the pieces of your heart and putting them together. You were healing.

When the newlyweds finished their first dance as a married couple, the guests applauded in joy and went back to the dance floor when another song started playing. Hyunjin drank the last sip of the drink he ordered and stood up. You didn't want to admit but you were kinda disappointed that he was already going. You started to wonder if you had said anything wrong or said too much, that was until he offered his hand to you with a smile.

He saw your confused expression and explained it clearly“Let's dance. You're not planning on staying in this bar for the whole night, are you? ”

“I am, actually. Besides I'm going home soon, there's no need to-”

“C'mon Y/n. ” he interrupted you while moving forward to hold your hand “You cannot come to a wedding party and not dance to at least one song. I promise I'll stop bothering you after this.”

Hesitantly, you held his hand back and got up.

“Was my offer to stop bothering you so tempting? You're even smiling” he said, making you laugh.

“Shut up.”

The room was filled with couples and friends. You didn't notice that the song that was playing, falling in love by cigarettes after sex, required a slow dancing. You just noticed it after Hyunjin was really close to you, holding your waist with both hands and smiling dearly for you. You soon placed your hands in his shoulder.

“You weren't so bold before, you know.”

“What do you mean?”

“Normally you wouldn't invite someone to dance, you were always kinda shy. I remember I begged you to dance with me in my own birthday party and still you denied.”

“That was when I was a trainee, how do you even remember that?”

“Oh it made me cry for weeks”

He laughed, bringing you closer to him. You guys were barely dancing, you were just hugging each other and swinging from side to side.

“Were you always this dramatic?”

“You're one to talk.”

“Well...” Hyunjin said before sighing, like he was wondering what words to use for what he was about to say.“we can say that I regret not accepting your invite to dance back then. And who knows when I'll have another opportunity.”

You were the shy one now. You really didn't expect to Hyunjin to be so bold, even though he didn't say nothing considered too much and you probably were analysing to deeply. Trying to not blush, you decided to light the situation: "I say it was the alcohol that made you so straightforward."

"Oh that helped of course" he laughed. And you kept talking the most random things while being on each other's arms, dancing to a love song like it was something casual. When the first song came to an end, he was ready to say goodbye to you, even though that was the last thing he wanted in the moment.

"I don't mind dancing for another song" you said. You don't know what made you change your mind so quickly, but then you saw his smile and understood the change of heart. That smile was worth a lot of dances.

You probably danced for more than two hours. In slow songs you'd just hug each other while talking about your life, in happy songs you would dance like crazy and proceed to judge those who were better than you and sometimes you'd just follow hyunjin's lead to try to follow a dance routine. You just stopped when Hyunjin was covered in sweat and your feet couldn't handle anymore. Then you both went to the bar, laughing like that was the funniest thing to ever happen on your life.

"Y/N!"

Looking to the side, you were met with Yeji. You noticed that her breath wasn't even, which meant that she was probably looking for you for a while now.

“You're still friends with Yeji?”

“Yeah, we still go out sometimes. Why?”

“Just wanted to know.”

“I was looking for you everywhere” Yeji was now right in front of you, breathing heavily “Me and the girls are going back to the dorms, we need to be up early tomorrow. Do you want to go with us?”

You searched for your cell phone, wondering what time it was. It was a little bit past midnight. You wanted to be there for more time, you felt like the night was just starting, but sadly the Itzy girls were your only ride back home. That meant you needed to go now.

You glanced at Hyunjin, who was looking at with expectation. For a second you thought that he was trying to convince you to stay for a bit longer, to enjoy the night with him. But it couldn't be this, right? So you just brushed it off.

“Well, I'll be going then” he gave you a small smile, but he was averting his eyes, trying to not look directly at you, but still he got closer to hug you goodbye “I hope to see you around.”

“Don't go missing this time.”

You laughed at his little joke and he giggled back. You believe it would've been easier to go away if he kept looking at somewhere else, but now his eyes were on you and you felt like you couldn't move. You truly wished the night could be longer.

You had your thoughts interrupted when Yeji faked a cough by your side, making you and Hyunjin both come back to reality and making you get away from his arms. Only then you started to walk away, trying to not look as much as you could.

“Bye Hyunjin.”

He just nodded his head, trying to not say bye. You and Yeji started to walk away, saying goodbye to the ones you'd find in your way.

"Oh wait" you remembered your friend "I still have to congratulate Changbin and his partner, I didn't get the chance to do that earlier."

"They were talking to his parents last time I saw them. Do you feel better?"

"Kinda? I mean, it will take a while to be 100% over this but I already feel a weight off my shoulders."

Yeji smiled and, even though she didn't say anything else, you could see she was happy for your growth. Now you could only wish you would heal and find yourself in a better situation from now on. Maybe you could fall in love again, deeper than you've felt before.

Feedbacks and reblogs are very much appreciated!

[admirxation]

˗ˏˋ admirxation's weekly fic recs ´ˎ˗

!! dark content ahead, please read the warnings the authors have provided, and then continue at your own discretion !!

5th may '24: here are some fics i've collected this week, obviously this is not every single fic but i wanted to give some more spotlight on the ones that literally had me bouncing off the walls lmao. if anyone wants to see more recommendations i have a 'admirxation fic recs' tag if you're ever wanting to read something, and i want to try and do this every Sunday to give some love to creators. i will try to limit this to 10-20, and some weeks might be shorter cuz i don't always have to time. thank you to these creators making these fics and please give them some love

resident evil fics

“If I gotta sin to see her again then I’m gonna lie.” [NSFW] {dad’s boss!Jack Krauser x fem!reader} ~ The reader ends up on their knees for the stranger allowed in their house; starting a fling with her fathers boss.

this was written by @mrswint3rs now i read this a bit ago but i just can’t forget about it. i love krauser content so much like there needs to be more content for this man, i love my pookie leon a feral amount but pookie bear needs to share some spotlight for the other RE guys. i am not embarrassed to admit that i keep rereading this fic, it does something to the brain chemistry. honestly the moment this girl posts more krauser fics im leaping like it’s my last meal cuz AHHHHHHH. the forceful but seductive characterisation that is written within krauser is so memorable and had me blushing and kicking my feet, and to expose myself further the secrecy tropes always get the meter going they are my guilty pleasure.

playing house [NSFW] {stepdad!Leon Kennedy x fem!reader} ~ the readers mother had passed away, leaving Leon and the reader to get closer.

this was written by @miss-oranje-disco-dancer now i always thought i wasn’t into the whole ddlg scene, before anyone things im hating i never gave hate to the concept i was just never apart of the craze if u get me, however, this fic has made me rlly rlly crave ddlg content to the point i’m wondering if the writer laced their words with crack cuz IM SO HOOKED. the gradual progression of the reader and leon is so hot, especially *spoilers for the rest of the fic* when they start sharing a bed dude the tingles i felt, and then the breeding when the reader acts so nonchalant about being bred by leon like YESSIR I NEED THIS MORE THAN ANYTHING.

Playground Love {older!Leon Kennedy x fem!reader} ~ age gap love between reader and Leon.

this was written by @j3llyd0nut . i might have a problem which how much older men fanfics i consume, like gurl its becoming a big problem… that i dont wanna fix oop- this fic doesn’t go into smut (ik what a shocker for me to be recommending something that is straight up porn lmao) but it does deal with age gaps, and i felt the way the writer portrayed it was so well written, especially with the readers’ mothers feelings to it. dating someone older comes with a mix of feelings, the envy was well encapsulated as well as the worry where it is often people try to warn. also the ending quote was such a killer (as an oscar wilde fan hehe… im an english student i love a reference).

Nerd Leon [NSFW] {nerdy!Leon Kennedy x nerdy!fem!reader} ~ Leon and the reader are both virgins who have had a crush on one another.

this was written by @nvoirs (it won’t let me tag them but you have the link to go show them some love). i love lil nerdy leon, he's so cute, especially with the pictures above the fic hehe. honestly the reader is so relatable, the idea of someone asking you out as a joke hahah ive been there too many times, no one can force me back into high school i will claw them. i quite liked the dynamic of them learning together, hehehe it's so so hot and cute at the same time and it deserves so much more love in my humble and very correct opinion.

the last of us fics

older Joel Miller [NSFW] {older!Joel Miller x afab!reader} ~ ft nervous Joel who hasn’t dated in a while and nervous to be with the reader who reassures she wants to be with him.

this was written by @pedroshotwifey and omfg i’m like the biggest simp for joel to the point it’s honestly embarrassing lmao, i feel like they wrote joel quite well and i would imagine if he was to become involved with someone again he would be nervous and be in his head about it; i found the writing of the transition back into sharing physical intimacy really well written and enjoyable, it’s not easy to do that but the author did it so well. my fav joel oneshot.

jujutsu kaisen fics

A proper send off [NSFW] {stepdad!Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader} ~ Toji puts his claim on the reader before she goes to college

this was written by @bratbby333. i feel like i died, like the author put the words on the screen and it make me curl up in a ball and squirming cuz i need toji biblically, and then i died, and then the words brought be back to heaven and then i was bonked and put into horny jail. i’m actually feral for this man. i’m feral for too many fictional men but toji is ughhhhh AHFJFKDKSKSKDDKEKSKW. i loved the descriptions of the reader almost being made for him, or more accurately, Toji making the reader made for him; the description of *SPOILERS* him moulding her pussy for his dick was YUM YUM YUM YUM YUM, i was salivating like fucking homer simpson I NEED IT.

Daddy Issues [NSFW] {stepdad!Toji Fushiguro x fem!reader} ~ reader is a brat whose stopped by her step father Toji

this was written by @nexysworld and my oh my does this girl cook, I AM THE BIGGEST NEXY FAN EVER HEHEHEHEHE. i am a new recruit to the toji fan club and boy oh boy was this the most exciting oneshot to first read after finding my love for this beautiful man. I gotta say the way nexy writes toji is honestly a game changer. like he’s such a jerk that u wanna slap, but i also am enticed by how much of a jerk he is… and perhaps wanna be slapped by him- WHO SAID THAT 👀 damn.

“well, we should probably fuck. Right?” [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ reader and gojo are trapped in the prison realm with nothing else to do.

this was written by @kingkonoha. now as we have all learnt about me liking something normally isn’t in my vocabulary; if i like a piece of media best believe im putting my whole soul into it. jjk is a new edition to my fandom endeavours and heheh gojo is my first love, im such a gojo girlie IF ANYONE COMES TO DETROY MY PEACE F OFF LMAO (gojo and toji girlie fr i am). okay if you’re a gojo girlie, kingkonoha’s writing is top tier. i loved the way they encapsulated gojo’s personality, he’s so cocky in this oneshot and ugh i just can’t help but see it so on brand for gojo; also the dirty talk in this fic is like toe curling afhdisosfheisidfhwowjwf I NEED HIM IN A WAY THAT IS CONCERNING TO FEMINISM.

The fanboy guide [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ gojo is the readers number one fan and manages to finally meet them in a meet and greet.

this was written by @kingkonoha . i love obsessing over fictional men BUT OH THIS FIC RLLY HAD THE TURNED TABLES. look i dont need anyone judging my likes, i like the idea of someone, especially gojo, obsessing over me and telling me he loves me while i ride him. girlhood = hearing i love you while riding gojo lmao. i love this creator to the point they’re probably fed up on me constantly liking their stuff haha. some bits i wanna point out, the dirty talk was like A* and the way he’s obsessed and basically babbles i love u like AFHFJSWISODODOWKWNEJ this has a chokehold on me and is like feral spray for the gojo girlies to get going lmao.

Tease [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ reader teases her sensei over text, and he later shows up at the readers door.

this was written by @dark-and-kawaii . oh look more gojo fics, are we surprised, no rlly cuz he's so hot and ugh i need him so much. i love dirty talk especially sexting it's so hot, but the fact he literally shows up at the door? i was shook but like in a horny way lmao. honestly the jealousy he feels it’s like kinda embarrassing how much i love to imagine someone all jealous over me like hehe tell me how much im in ur mind rent free HAHA. honestly i love this blog, i followed for the bg3 content and stayed for like the absolute talent in every one of their works, so much love <3

i will possess your heart [NSFW] {yandere!satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ satoru thinks the reader belongs to him and will go any length to make that happen.

this was written by @bratbby333 . okay on this account we love a yandere, the idea of someone being so obsessed that it’s a danger to the lover, themselves and everyone around, A MUST!!!! honestly, it’s kinda baddddd how much i love these yandere oneshots but oh well it’s not like im gonna stop eating this up when everyone fr cooks. i honestly have to say this is the best yandere fic ive seen, like i was fangirling over the author over every word and punctuation they strung together, like huhhhhh it had me on a chokehold throughout it all. the journey of obsession and how far gojo went and his pathway to that was so well written, and the scene with the ex boyfriend and the heart ?!?!?!?! i was literally wide eyed like an owl going “WHAT OMFG”.

to be ex husband [NSFW] {satoru gojo x fem!reader} ~ ex bf gojo comes back in readers life and asks for a hand in marriage.

this was written by @arminsumi . lmao this fic made me have so many emotions. first of all, SHOKO MY BELOVED IS MY BESTIE I LOVE SHOKO. but the idea of gojo being an ex cuz he was a play boy i was like hmmm f u man, breaking my heart (like bruh i was so offended like i actually was the reader to the point i was like bruh i have to calm down) and then after when he’s getting all giggly with suguru im like hehehehe let the fucking commence i need me some gojo action. honestly this fic has an amazing balance of oooo this is sexy, to feelings of being a lil mad, but also comedic moments. it honestly encaptures gojo’s character so well, i was rlly impressed. also i didn’t know how much i needed someone to ask for marriage while fucking ahe

[pondslime]

Do you think that what Bo said about him and his brothers ending up in foster care was also a lie? I've seen some who think he wasn't lying about that but I don't think the timing and the codependency him and his brothers have adds up to them being separated for a bit, ya know? Sorry for bombarding you with a question but ugh there's just so much untouched lore potential I wanna screeeeeam

*cracking knuckles* oh baby u just opened the floodgates I am about to be SO fckn annoying

so personally, I very much believe that bo's spinning an ENTIRE crock of shit during that conversation w/carly and wade

something that I think we all need to highlight more is that the baby idiot himself has SUCH a flair for the dramatic. our favorite caveman is a chronic theater kid. like, okay acting 101? okay thespian? okay daytime soap OPERA??? the scene he sets for this fuckmurdermayhem is just...................SO grotesque and dramatic and entirely UNNECESSARY LMAO

he's a weirdo who has sequestered himself in a town full of corpses and u just KNOW the gaps between the wax nonsense are LONG and BORING and he's ANTSY

the whole time he's chasing carly thru town he's just. blissed out. goin hehehehehhehehehehe be vewwy vewwwy quiet!! we're huntin' wabbits!!! elmer fudd-mode FULLY engaged

he GRINS before he's shot by a fckin crossbow?????????? BABY???? WHAT ARE U DOING??????

he is truly on some other shit!! convinced his bargain bin broadway play will go off without a hitch and he will somehow??? be getting a standing ovation for his foolishness????

sighing DREAMILY

this is the most fun he's had in possibly months, and he's living la vida loca. he's that one tiktok of all the kids performing summer loving in the denny's. this is his golden globes. his bafta (big ass fucking truck absurdity). his academy award winning performance, starring his raging boner & very little foresight!!!!

I think there might be LIL grains of truth to his story, ofc. the best lies have small kernels of truth to them, and bo's lies seem to work the best when he adds those in (mentioning that he's close to the deceased to incur pity/getting nick to agree to follow him to a second location by mentioning that they might have gone up to the house)

but I do believe that most of it is complete bullshit lmao

there is absolutely no way in hell that those boys EVER got separated. to me!!! at least!! nope. they were in that miserable little house together the whole time. vincent and bo's interactions together speak to years of sibling tension and growing resentment. lester's inclusion in all of this w/his role of like. the ferryman to the fckin UNDERWORLD that is ambrose. is so v a marker of his attachment to his older brothers

they're all inextricably linked!!!!!!

bo 100% killed victor tho. u do not mime shooting urself in the head when discussing ur dad's death if u did not shoot him point blank range w/a smile on ur face. u simply do not. not entirely sure if he killed trudy. feel like that might've been vincent/a group job. or. pet theory. she DID just die of natural causes. or. other pet theory. she was actively participating/aware of the first couple murders. we'll never know but. huh

I also REALLY don't buy the "trudy got a cyst in her brain" stuff. I've played around w/it in a couple fics, but I v much think the probablity of it being a complete fabrication? oh 99.9%. most definitely. talking about ur mom getting strapped to the bed & screaming loud enough for the whole town to hear? hsdfjhfdsjhsdf BOY GOODBYE.

like????? that's SUCH a deranged thing to tell someone u just met. and it v much seems like smthn he tossed out to purposefully unnerve them. he didn't have to say that, but he DID. bc he loves the cat and mouse game. that's why he creeps on them @ the campsite. he's so deeply abnormal

it's all this weird sad little story that's designed to make u uncomfortable. also. sidenote......................in this version of the scene that he's set, he's the mourning parishioner sadly recounting a tale of woe that he's notably detached to. who is he in relation to the story he weaves? nobody. just an observer.

if life could be a fckin dream boseph!!!

BTW. he does this in the original script, but it's somehow EVEN weirder.

he is. and I CANNOT stress this enough. roleplaying as a kid in the neighborhood that trudy liked and would spoil.

???????????????????????????????????????????

babygirl is truly going thru it!!!!!! babygirl this is EMBARRASSING!!!!!! ur MOMMY ISSUES!!!!!!!!!!! BABYGIRL!!!!!!!!! they are SHOWING!!!!! they are STAPLED to ur forehead!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!

he's so ABNORMAL!!!!!!! I need to make out w/him!!!!!!!! RN!!!!!!!!!!!

vincent waiting 2 hear what dumbass alternate reality bo has cooked up for this batch of tourists:

I always talk about how dumb bo is. and I mean every word of it. I really do. but I do think he's got a couple braincells.

I v much feel like he's v much a creature of habit. he's been doing this shebang for years n years and he knows how it goes. he gets his fuckin n suckin and vincent gets his wax sculptures. bada bing bada boom. showtime baby.

his "plan" is v much as solid as a plastic bag drifting thru the wind, wanting to start again. he is fr hinging this whole thing on a series of events, that, should they not happen, he has no alternative for. and he is so weird and so strange and cannot deviate from his script LEST he get pissymad and ruin everything. he's so dumb. I'm so v in love w/him.

TL; DR!!

I wrote this for my peabrain video essay script and it's all the above bullshit nonsense. but more coherent:

& an unrelated bit. bc it's still my favorite bit of the script & the only part I recorded a voice clip for sfjdhdfjshdfs

[gunilslaugh]

hi!! i just wanna say that i absolutely love all your writing and i get so excited whenever i see that you've posted <33 this is my first time requesting, and i had this idea that i couldn't get out of my head lmao so could you do a one shot where gaon is spiderman and the reader is his best friend, but they don't know that he's spiderman and he's trying to keep it a secret from them. but then at some point they find out and it's this cute thing of like not seeing him any different and joking around about it n stuff, also maybe before they find out they could be like simping over spiderman obvi not knowing that it's gaon and he's just there like "🕴"

thank you!!

Aww thank you that's sweet <3 I hope you enjoy reading Spiderman Jiseok lol.

Kwak Jiseok

Summary: Jiseok is keeping a secret from you, he’s Spiderman

WC:~1.6k

Warning:grammar

photo not mine credit to owner.

A sigh escapes from your lips after you check the time. Jiseok was late again, although this seems to be the new normal lately. Every time you make plans with him there is always some reason why he’s late. His reasons for being late are vague too. “I got caught up, sorry,”, “I had to help my mom,”, “ I took an unexpected nap." Ok, you’ll give the last one to him, but the other reasons just don’t sit right with you. You have a feeling that he’s lying. Why would he lie to you though? 

The sound of a knock penetrated through your front door. If that isn’t you Jiseok  you think, getting up to answer the door. Opening the door you’re met with a slightly messy haired Jiseok.

“Hey, sorry I’m late,” Jiseok greeted you with an apologetic smile. 

“No worries you’re always late,” you jabbed, stepping aside to let him in. He enters your house. “So did you get caught up again?” You asked.

“Yeah, something like that,” he replied, scratching the back of his head. He ran into a thief who had just robbed a convenience store on his way over. Of course it was his Spiderman duty to catch the robber, but he couldn’t tell you that. He had to keep his identity as Spiderman a secret. Jiseok didn’t like lying to you, he hated it. Being Spiderman was awesome, keeping it from his loved ones wasn’t. “ I brought snacks!” he ranged happily, holding up a bag, trying to make it up to you for being late again. 

“I guess I can forgive you for being late again then. Let’s go to my room,” you told him. The two of you headed to your room and Jiseok pulled out the snacks. You plopped down on your bed, grabbing the t.v. remote and turning on the t.v.

“This just in, Spiderman has caught this thief after they robbed this local convenience store,” a news telecaster said upon turning on the t.v. They showed security footage of Spiderman catching the thief. 

“That’s the convenience store by my house. Isn’t that where you got these snacks? Did you get to see Spiderman!” You questioned Jiseok excitedly. 

“Oh-uh no I- I must’ve just missed him,” Jiseok stuttered out. Your shoulders dropped in disappointment 

“How lame,” you stated. “I want to meet Spiderman. He’s so cool! I bet he’s cute under that mask too. I can sense it. Did you think if I got stuck in a tree he would come save me?” You rambled. Jiseok sat there stiff as you talked so smittenly about Spiderman. 

“I think you’d be an idiot for getting stuck in a tree,” he scoffed. “You’re not a cat,” he added. 

“My neighbor has a cat,” you implied, not so subtly.

“Y/n, you better leave that cat alone,” Jiseok scolds, causing you to laugh. 

“Don’t act like you don’t want to meet Spiderman,” you mized.

“I-” it’s not like he can meet himself. “Didn’t you say you wanted to watch a movie?” Jiseok opts for changing the subject. 

“Oh yeah. Spiderman being blocks away from where I live distracted me,” you chuckled, beginning to pull up the movie. Jiseok lets out a breath of relief. It’s too awkward to talk about Spiderman when he is Spiderman.

It’s been a few weeks. Jiseok is still what you now call routinely late. You’ve noticed something else that is weird too. Jiseok had cut himself while cutting fruit, but the next day the cut was completely gone. Jiseok tried to excuse it by saying it was just a small cut, so it healed quickly, but you saw the cut yourself. You’re the one who put the bandaid on it. It wasn’t small enough to heal in a day, you’re certain about that. This incident also reminded you about the cat scratches he had a while back that seemed to just disappear the next day too. It was strange, but Jiseok didn’t seem to think so. He even made you think that you were the one being strange about it.

Presently, you’re standing on top of your slightly rickety dresser to hang some pictures on your wall. Jiseok was standing on the floor behind you because he was paranoid about you falling. He tried to talk you into letting him hang them up, but you insisted on doing it yourself.

“Jiseok can you go grab me the box of nails over on my bed?” You asked. Jiseok looked at the box of nails, sitting on your bed on the other side of your room. Then he looks back at you. 

“You better not fall,” he warns you, going to quickly grab the nails. 

“I’m not gonna fall,” you laughed. You did fall. Right after you said that you wouldn’t. You took one too many steps to the left, where there was no more dresser to stand on. Letting out a yelp you waited for the impact of landing on the floor. However the floor never came, instead Jiseok’s arms caught you. 

“I told you not to fall!” He scolds you. Jiseok was on the other side of your room. Even if he saw you fall there was no way he could have gotten to you in time to catch you. He clearly did though or else you wouldn’t be in his arms right now. Things seriously did not add up and you couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Jiseok I shouldn’t be in your arms right now!” You yelled frustrated. 

“Oh sorry here,” he mumbled, putting you down. Thinking he made you uncomfortable.

“No, Jiseok I mean I should be lying on the floor in pain. There is no way you could have caught me when you were standing over there,” you pointed towards your bed. 

“Uh-” Jiseok doesn’t know what to say because you’re right. He couldn’t just watch you fall and possibly get hurt though. 

“You’re always unexplainably late too. How is it possible for you to be so caught up all the time? Plus I know for a fact that that cut on your finger wasn’t that small. It shouldn’t have been healed the next day. Did you forget about how I put the bandaid on it? How you whined like a baby when I disinfected it? This doesn’t make sense Jiseok,” you went off. Jiseok sighed. 

“I know y/n, I know and I’m sorry. It’s just…” he trails off. 

“Just what and don’t lie to me. I can tell that you’ve been keeping something from me,” you tell him. Jiseok is silent. 

“I’m Spiderman,” he finally says. You scoffed.

“Fine don’t tell me,” you went to brush past him, but he caught you by the arm. 

“Y/n, I’m serious,” he states. “Look if you don’t believe me,” he goes over to his bag and reaches into it. He pulls out his mask showing it to you. You approached Jiseok, taking the mask in between your fingers. This can’t be real can it? Jiseok, your best friend, is Spiderman?

“Jiseok if this is some kind of joke,” you started to threaten.

“How else could I have caught you? Healed that quickly. Why I’m late all the time,” he defended. It did all make sense. When you think about it, him being Spiderman explains everything that’s been going on with him.

“I guess I was right then,” you said. 

“What?” Jiseok asked, confused. 

“When I said I bet Spiderman is cute under the mask,” you elucidated. Jiseok’s cheeks flame a shade of pink. “Oh gosh I said I wanted you to save me from a tree,” your other words hit you. Your cheeks now flame pink with embarrassment as you flopped down onto your bed. Jiseok laughs. 

“See you feel like an idiot for just saying it now,” he teased you, taking a seat on your bed.

“Stop!” You groaned, sitting up.

“Shouldn’t you be happy? You met Spiderman. You’re best friends with Spiderman,” he continued to play. 

“Spiderman is a lot lamer than I thought he’d be,” you remarked. Jiseok puts his hand over his heart in offense.  

“How dare you?” He lightly smacks your knee. 

Now you know that Jiseok is Spiderman, nothing is actually that different. Except you know why he’s late. Jiseok is thankful to have someone that he can talk to about his secret identity with. He was kinda scared that it would affect your friendship, but it didn’t. If anything it somehow found a way to make your friendship even stronger. 

“Sorry I’m late,” Jiseok apologized, entering your house. It was almost a catchphrase for him at this point.

“Get caught up again?” You played lightheartedly. 

“Yeah a cat  was stuck in a tree,” he told you with accusing eyes.

“I didn’t do it,” you raised your hands. The both of you burst out into laughter. 

“Would you save me though? If I was an idiot who got stuck in a tree?” You questioned as the two of you made your way to your bedroom.

“I’d always save you,” Jiseok answers. Something in the air shifts. You both feel it. 

“So if we went on a date would you be late to that too?” you quipped, falling onto your bed.

“I think Spiderman could take the day off. Just let him know when,” Jiseok takes his spot beside you. The both of you look at eachother locking eyes before a giggle leaves each of you. The unspoken feelings you have for each other linger in the air, but you don’t have to talk about them. You just know.

[darkstar225]

Twice's 10th member is receiving hate

The members noticed the difference in her mood the whole day. It could be because she got bad grades, she woke up late as she spend the night training or because of the hate she's receiving. Maybe all of them but the unnies wouldn't know, she didn't wanna seem weak and bother them with her issues when she knows all of them also receive hate and are doing fine. After a long day, she said good night to her sisters and practically sprinted to her room without her roommates (SMC) sleeping as soon as her head touched the pillow, which was already a bad sign since she hated to sleep without someone in the room with her.

Meanwhile in the living room...

Jihyo - Did you girls see how she looks tired?

Jeongyeon - Yeah, she's also in a mood. The girl can give us a run for our money when she's being sassy *rolls her eyes*

Nayeon - I taught her well *dries fake tears*

Momo - Be serious grandma, we're talking about our child

Nayeon - YAH! STOP CALLING ME GRANDMA

Dahyun - With all due respect unnie, shhhhh. You know Y/N is a light sleeper (can't relate, I could sleep through an earthquake)

Tzuyu - She's right unnie, once I got thirsty and opened the door to go to the kitchen and get a cup of water. She woke up immediately asking if I was okay

Chaeyoung - Fr, can someone go check if she woke up, please? I feel like it's been some time since she fell asleep so fast, she's probably exhausted. I agree with Jihyo unnie.

Sana - I'm gonna see if she's still in her room, brb

On the SMC room...

Y/N - Well, that didn't go the way I wanted. I wish I'd just escape this hate, they're not being fair to me, I keep being up all night overthinking all the mistakes they point out and training to be better than what they see. Am I not good enough? Maybe I suck at this. What if the group did improve without me being the black sheep? 

While thinking all of this she wasn't aware that a certain hamster had entered her room and informed the rest she was awake. When she finally came back from her mind, she let out a scream because her unnie was just staring at her looking quite creepy

Y/N - UNNIE, YOU SCARED ME!

Sana - Sorry honey, you're somewhere else but I knocked before entering. How are you? You seemed kinda out of it...

Y/N - I'm doing okay unnie, just lost a night's sleep, otherwise, I feel fine  

Sana - Don't lie to me, we know you. Right guys?

At that moment everyone that was outside the door went inside and nodded their heads.

Mina - Sana's right babe, we took note that you're not the same as always as soon as you got out of your bed this morning. 

Y/N - But-

Jihyo - No buts, we're getting through the issue you're having and you're getting some sleep after this with me (Jihyo, Jeongyeon and Mina's room)

Dahyun - Unnie is right (again), start talking, please... We're worried about you!

Y/N - That's exactly why I didn't wanna talk with you guys. I don't want to be a burden.

Momo - Again with this... We already talked about it, you know you're important to us and we care about you and your feelings, every time you need someone to hear you, we're there for you. Stop thinking that you're burdening us when you get sad, hurt or even mad like this morning. We know you like the back of our hands and we'll understand anything you request without questioning 'cause you always try to express what you need. Except if you ask for my jokbal lmao

Chaeyoung - What a way to kill the moment, da- dang.

Nayeon - And here I thought Momo was speaking facts, yeah... That sounds more like her lol

Jihyo - You did well Momo... Don't think we forgot about you young lady

Y/N - I mean, you could... Jk, tysm for always assuring me that you love me, sometimes things appear to be harder to believe after everything you hear from people.

Jeongyeon - Which people? Who do I've to kill? 

Tzuyu - Am I the only one who already understood what's going on? She's receiving hate! Now that I know everything falls in place, the anger, the sadness, the insecurity...

Mina - Wow, it makes sense. Is this it sweetie?

Y/N - Yo, are you a therapist 'cause gee, you read me like a book lol 

Sana - Stop joking, if that's the case, it's something severe

Y/N - Ok, ok. I'm sorry. Yeah, I got some hater recently that I can't get out of my hair, they talked about my dancing skills, my vocals, how I'm always lazy on stage and my poor expressions. It sucks as I'm starting to believe it and I can't seem to stop wanting to train, that's why I stay late at the studio. I'm exhausted unnies, it hurts so much to see that no one notices my efforts and just sees what I did incorrectly. *sobs*

Jihyo pulls Y/N closer and she lays on her chest while crying. Jihyo feels her shirt getting wetter as time went by and she felt heartbroken to see her maknae so glum. Without anything else to do everyone sat near and gave their love in their own style, all while Jihyo caressed Y/N's back repeating that things will be okay. 

After half an hour, sobs turned into sniffles and Y/N got out of Jihyo's chest and leaned on Momo that was behind her. Momo instantly gave her a kiss on the forehead, making the maknae giggle and the unnies hearts flutter with how cute she looked being so vulnerable. 

Jihyo - Are you better now?

Y/N - It's not something that goes away like magic but you guys made me feel inches better, you're the best family I could ask for!

Twice - OWNNNNN, that's what we're here for love bug. We're pressing charges against your haters or we're not TWICE!

You can certainly expect all the members to appear at JYP to threaten JYPapa so he can make that come true and give some vacation so they can help their dear maknae to heal because they love their dear maknae. 

A/N: I'm sorry for any errors, English is not my first language. Pls, let me know if there's something wrong, ty for reading <3

[toomuchracket]

mads d word matty and girlie babysitting the macdonalds kids so they have a night out. and it’s a bunch of chaos

oh my god lmfaoooooo ok so keir is a teeny baba eilidh is like 2, and ross enlists you to look after them for an evening so he can take mrs mac out for their anniversary - he drops them off at matty's with like three bags per kid and a list of bedtimes and bottle feed times for keir, then hugs his kids and you and waves as he drives off. like you said, it's a little bit chaotic; you have to figure out sterilising bottles and preparing baby formula and all that, while matty holds keir and tries not to lose patience with eilidh being a diva about what sort of pizza she wants for dinner (he's on the verge of being hangry lmao), and then keir needs changed so matty has to go and figure that one out, while eilidh and you set the table and play i spy while you wait for domino's to deliver dinner. you all eat, you watch an old barbie film that nobody else has seen (matty's more entranced by it than eilidh lmfao), and it's all nice - that is, until keir wakes up from his nap and will not stop crying until you pick him up and walk about with him, shushing him and cooing at him the way you've seen his mum do. he stays clinging to you until his actual bedtime, because his little lip starts trembling whenever you go to put him down; matty's like "me honestly. keir i understand you, mate", laughing when you roll your eyes and then wincing as eilidh tries to jam a clasp into his hair. she very nearly has a tantrum when you try to get her to bed, but you doing your nighttime skincare routine fascinates her so much that she forgets to - you sit her on your lap as you put your moisturiser on, and pretend to put some on her and then pretend to be sleepy so she'll copy you and go to bed. matty snaps a pic of this whole thing, then he does the bedtime story/lullaby combo in such a tender way that it makes your stomach feel a bit weird - when the two of YOU are tucked up in bed, exhausted from dealing with the kids, he pulls you close to him and says "i don't wanna be weird, but i love watching you with them. you just look so... comfortable", and you kiss his hand and tease "is this you saying you want us to have kids?", and matty's like "well, why lie - yeah. not necessarily now, but at some point. i think it'd be nice", and you snuggle into him and say "me too". it's maybe less nice when you're woken up by a two year old five hours later, but nice all the same <3

[lipglossanon]

alrighty fools spooky season is upon us aka it’s too hot for fall but i’m saying it’s fall anyway season so that means more dark stepdaddy leon spooky smut lmao. okay, i said originally this man’s porn collection was the Saw franchise as a whole,,,,,,,, what if moms out of the picture it’s spooky time and he takes reader on a little vacation to “Not The Cabin from Cabin in the Woods but A Cabin in Similar Woods” for fall break and they’re out there and he’s just like mind in overdrive with ideas because if a tree falls in a forest and no one’s around, does it make a sound? 😉 so like things come to a head after just days of sucking and fucking and ya know, hand stuff and he’s finally like it’s the last few days we’re here, how about (tw; non con esque smutty smut- i know gina bit overboard 🤭) i drop you off in the woods, no clothes and just your collar (let’s say it’s a property he’s had and it’s literal acres, nobody is out there and he’s not leaving her out there for long, obvi) he’s “left” and you’re waiting for him when he sneaks up behind you and you jump, he tightens his arms around you and tells you to run so you do, not far 🤭 before he’s on top of you whispering to you that he wants you to fight him so you’re scratching and biting, telling him no, not to- that it hurts and he’s being too mean but he doesn’t give up and finally wrestles your legs open bruising them in the process when you kick him and instantly regret it because he takes off his belt and binds your wrists behind your back leaving to fight him off with your legs to no avail when he’s finally got you pinned under him he pulls out his dick, absolutely throbbing from how much he’s into this and you’re trying to not make it obvious you want this too but like,,,,, he knows 👀 he’s jacking off over you, kneeling on your thighs keeping you spread out on the ground degrading you before he comes on your stomach making you whine but he just leaves his dick out while he reaches for his knife and starts cutting his name into you, probably branding you too telling you how hard you make his dick when you beg. i’m going to assume he skull fucks you cause like,,,, you’re incapacitated and by that point you just want him to use you because it’s been hours and he still hasn’t stopped with the foreplay but he doesn’t. he takes you back to the cabin and feeds you before putting you to bed and when you wake up there’s a note telling you he’ll be back in a bit and to keep the door locked so you do just that not knowing he’s outside, he lets himself in quietly watching you take a shower and leaving things askew to make you uncomfortable which works because there’s no cell reception out there, oops 🤭 so you sit on the bed in a towel to try to figure out what to do when “someone” comes up behind you (i wanna say he’d get a scream mask or some shit let’s be real this man has his kinks and i feel like masks are one….. omg put him in a wolf mask for the red riding hood fic 🫣🤭) you’re pinned to the bed and he’s already discarded the towel and forced himself in you before he talks and you instantly settle but still give him the performance he wants throwing a fit that just “accidentally” makes him go deeper into you when he finally puts you on your back making you watch him fuck you in black jeans, black tank top (we all love his arms don’t lie 🤭), fingerless gloves and the scream mask???? maybe 🤭

- 💀

(okay todays note is about the red riding hood thing because 👀,,,,,,, idk if i’m the only one with a mask kink but like him in his brown jacket and all black with the gloves and a wolf mask chasing reader down and fucking her 👀 i’d die a happy death if he did that to me like eeeeeh it’s soooooooo close to werewolf leon too, like daddy leon the big bad wolf just wrestling reader to the ground and being even more rough with her because the costume is a good excuse to try new things like i can’t articulate how good that’d be 🥵)

💀 anon, you’re killing me 😩 (but please don’t stop sending in your big brained asks 😘 🤭)

And if I told you that I’ve been thinking of a scream inspired Leon fic?? 👀 👀 I just wanna get my other October fics setup before starting anything new 🤭

But the chase?? 🥵🥵 love that so so much

I def have werewolf Leon coming up next month (like legit monsterfucking is happening friend 🤣) not exactly a wolf mask though 🤭

(Sadly the only ghost face-esque pic I could find with Leon 👇)

[coldslaws-gear-station]

I wanna know what happened after Alder caught up with bn in that one comic, I remember being really confused why it wasn't continued till I saw the pole from ages ago

Also yeah, roaches suck ass. Hate spring and summer cuz of them they scare the shit outta me

- 💌

scared of roaches gang ❤️ im lowkey so infuriated rn because i was legit about to turn over and go to sleep but i caught this one out of the corner of my eye and then it fell on my bed. so im definitely awake now

anyways woes aside. i still actually want to finish that comic and did make a bit of progress on it beyond whats been posted. problem is i don't have much motivation to finish the dream characters info (nero and gio jr) either because the person who i was developing them with left the fandom, and it sorta spurred me into losing interest in them except for penny. so im in this weird limbo zone of like "aughh i wanna finish the bau comic" "but i should finish the dream kids' info before i do that" "but i don't wanna work on them" if that makes sense u_u

but besides that, here are two unposted pages (theres an unfinished 3rd, but it's in too much of a messy state for me to post it without being embarrassed LMAO)

and then spoilers for the rest below

alder attempts to negotiate with n, but n just keeps refusing. alder knows he slipped up here in even mentioning prison, probably making n's stubborn refusal to cooperate even worse right now. he's just exhausted and frustrated, and admittedly, n has been one of the most difficult people he's ever worked with. he's given everything he can manage to try and help this man- he took hydreigon's blast to save his life, he's given him shelter and food, an opportunity at freedom, and n absolutely will not let his guard down even an inch. so alder is at his wits end.

"Natural... If you want to get off of house arrest, you have to stay here for two years. After that, you can just... lie to everyone, tell them you're better now. Then run off to wherever it is you wanna be so badly. I've given you as much freedom as I'm legally allowed, and still, it's just not enough for you."

Alder continues. "You can still come back in and go to bed. I'll do whatever I can to keep this infraction off your record, and we'll keep trying to figure out how to make this transition easier for you- but you need to be open with us. You can't be angry at a world that never wronged you. The only one to blame is Ghetsis."

N struggles to find words for most of Alder's rebuking, but at the mention of Ghetsis, of course, he snaps. "Do-- do you think it was only Ghetsis who hurt me? Do you think Ghetsis is the only human who I've seen cause pain? That man isn't even my real father- I-- I was born to a village that cast me out! Left me to starve- wanted me to die so I couldn't curse them with my presence!" This is the most N has even spoken to Alder his entire stay. He's out of breath. "And even once I was able to leave the castle-- everywhere I went, I heard- heard stories of humans mistreating each other, mistreating others. Constantly. Everyone turns at some point. Do you expect me to stay around you, just waiting for the day you show your true colors? Waiting for you to use me?"

Alder falters a bit. His heart hurts, his anger wanes. But he did what he intended to do; he got N distracted.

"S-so I have to run. I need to escape from you people before it.. it's too.. late." N's voice tapers into a breathless whisper as he bumps into something behind him. They realize what just happened immediately, but they dont get time to react- they're restrained by a move from venomoth, which then uses sleep powder on them as they thrash and scream at Alder. N crumples to the ground after just a moment, and Alder trudges over to collect them.

Alder knows it was a dirty move. It was just a last resort to keep the man from tearing off further into the woods and causing even more of a disaster for both of them. "I'm sorry, son. Just.. rest, okay." He whispers. "I'm not going to let anyone else hurt you. You have my word." N probably doesn't even hear it, they're out like a light within moments. But Alder could see plain on N's face, as he rapidly faded from consciousness, the look of a man that is terrified and trapped and desperate, utterly hurt to his core. And his will to keep working with N is renewed.

N wakes up at home, finding themself uninjured and tucked into bed rather than waking up on a prison floor, much to their surprise. Alder's kept this whole thing under wraps, like he said he would try to. They have one more chance.

[kirinda-ondo]

Cobalt for the headcanon ask game?

O shit uh

not gonna lie canon already barely gives a shit about him so it's basically My City Now for every Cobalt fan, but let's see lmao

Our Boy spends a lot of time off-screen, forgotten by the plot (aside from one time he just opted out entirely by going back to bed lmao), and there's a wide variety of ways to go about explaining or justifying it beyond "Tezuka just straight up didn't know what to do with him"

Realistic: His family isn't repeatedly forgetting about him while they go on adventures without him, he's just babysitting baby brother Chi-tan (who is generally even more forgotten by time than Cobalt), which is something he genuinely like doing (there's an episode where he basically argues with Uran over who's better at putting him to sleep, and another where he just straight up YOINKS this infant out of Astro's arms and it's really funny--). In episodes pre-Chi-tan or ones where Chi-tan is also involved in the family adventure but Cobalt isn't, maybe he actually just likes vibing by himself. I know I personally love having the house to myself while everyone else is off doing whatever--

Hilarious: Cobalt actually has a rich inner world with his own friends and adventures and all kinds of incredibly wacky shit happening that nobody has any idea about because nobody ever asks the right questions. There's an episode where he gets kidnapped by a society of little colonists that live in the center of the earth, becomes their slave, saves them from a giant mole, gets promoted to general, accidentally starts a war because he's easily distracted, and then single-handedly has to stop the war he started, (and that's not even getting into the giant monster crickets and their funky background music) and Astro doesn't really even show up until the last few minutes of the episode. Just imagine something like that, but more. Give us a Cobalt spinoff where he goes on silly adventures Tezuka Pro I am begging we can do it we can make it happen and it'll be really funny I prommy--

Heart-Crushing (Evil): Cobalt IS a victim of child neglect and favoritism. Astro is everybody's favorite world-saving child of science, Uran is the Little Sister of all time, requiring a lot of attention lest she inflict chaos upon the world around her, and Cobalt, who is generally far more mild-mannered and lacking a lot of the abilities Astro does (a bit moreso if you go by the anime version where he's literally a defective prototype), he gets pretty easily lost in the shuffle. In the anime, they literally forgot about him on Christmas. And in the manga, there's a chapter wherein Cobalt gets to go to school, albeit a different one to Astro, and they get caught up in a school rivalry and basically wind up fighting each other until they're both "dead," seemingly unable to be repaired. Astro and Cobalt's parents are seen mourning Astro... but not Cobalt. Turns out Astro's fine and they sent home a fake body (all as part of a lesson on not making robots fight each other for sport), but we literally never see or hear of Cobalt again for the rest of that chapter. We don't see him with any canon friends in either version, so uh, if you wanna really look into it seriously, Being Cobalt is Suffering.

Fuck Canon: Everybody likes and hangs out with Cobalt a reasonable amount and he is happy and thriving and plot-important and doesn't constantly get forgotten and pushed aside because this time the writers would actually know how to use him and he gets a character arc and iconic moments and this is honestly just more of a wishlist than a headcanon at this point i'm sorry--

[alittlebitgoofy]

alone. (luxx/spice)

i posted it! i got distracted playing games and meant to post earlier but here we are (a bit on point given recent events lmao) but round 2 of this little college au <3 i wrote this in like two days i cannot lie it just kinda came out of me and i wanna share it :))

ao3 link

Spice felt a shiver wrack her whole body, her core trembling at every minute sound. She could only let out a whine, gripping onto the blanket thrown over her head so tight her knuckles turned white. Another noise, another whimper escaped her through. It felt like it was closing up, all she could do was scrunch her eyes shut and make a few noises, praying it would be over soon and she could deal with life again. 

It was embarrassing, having to scurry back to her dorm when all she wanted to do was have lunch with her friends. Malaysia raised an eyebrow when she started glancing around the room, looking for an escape. It may have been a blessing in disguise that Luxx wasn’t there. She didn’t want them to see her like this. So incapable of being a functional person 

Sugar opening the door was the straw that broke the camel's back, Spice letting out a pained squeal in a vain attempt to signal to her sister that now was a bad time. Sugar looked at her, curled in on herself on her bed and felt her heart sink. Spice was always a bit more sensitive, she always seemed more antsy and jumpy. Things had to be a certain way, her hair was always perfect or she couldn’t go outside, too many noises would make her shudder. If it got too bad she’d shut down all together and become a husk her usual self, squirming and flinching away from anything that made a sound. 

Thankfully she knew how to deal with this, highschool was tough for both of them, closeted identical twins who were still trying to find themselves while being judged for every little thing in their suburban town. They had to have each other's back, Spice would come home from school and just collapse onto her bed, hiding from the world until she could handle herself again. 

Sugar grabbed her headphones, gently sliding them under the blanket that her twin was clutching for dear life. Then the doll she always carried around, currently sat in the pocket of one of her leather jackets. Spice let out a short squeak, the twin telepathy translating it as a mangled sort of thank you. 

Sugar didn’t know what went through her head during these episodes, all she knew was that Spice needed absolute silence, no touching or disturbing and her headphones. Darkness also helped as she flicked out the light and exited the room, praying Spice would come down from this sooner rather than later. 

Spice could barely feel her body, shaking like a leaf as she fumbled to connect her headphones to her phone. Putting on the first album that popped up and letting out a small sigh of relief at the familiar noises. Her phone buzzing with a message took back whatever calmness she got from putting on some music, Spice kicked at her mattress, praying it would split open and swallow her whole so she didn’t have to deal with this. It buzzed again as she kicked harder, letting out another pained squeal that must have had her neighbours wondering what could possibly be happening in there. 

They were at class though, at least that’s what she told herself to calm the rising anxiety at the idea of someone hearing this. 

As she glanced at the notification, something shifted, knotting in her stomach with an impending dread as she saw it was Luxx. 

Luxx: hey, you ok? marsh said you went all quiet in the cafeteria and ran off when malaysia tried to talk to you

Luxx: if you wanna talk i’m free

Okay. This was fine. She was fine. Nothing bad was happening, Luxx was just worried. They weren’t judging her. She was fine. 

But she would judge if she knew, anyone would. Spice was a freak, sensitive, abnormal. Nothing anyone with a brain would want to be around. She was annoying and talked too much, she knew that. She was just dramatic, the sounds weren’t that loud. No one could hear the electricity crackle from the lights or the buzz of a tv screen. Or that high pitched whine that came from headphones when you paused audio. She was being dramatic.

But if she was, why did this feel so real? Why was everything so intense she could feel every fibre of her body standing on edge. Why did she need to kick, to destroy something or just let her feelings out on something. Was the hysterical crying not enough? She’d managed to muffle it into the blanket but the occasional heavy gasp or squeal still came out of her. 

Luxx’s phone must have been showing read by now. They might get angry if she didn’t reply, Spice forced her eyes open, her shaking hands struggling to press anything on the keyboard without it becoming illegible. 

Spice: too much noise, needed quiet Luxx: are you handling okay? do you need me to come over?

Spice: alone.

She put her phone on to not disturb after that, breathing a sigh of relief that her phone wouldn’t violently buzz anymore. 

At least things seemed to be calming down, the darkness, the quiet except from the music she could control, the doll clutched by her chest. Spice focused on the feeling of the blanket on top of her, letting out a tired sigh as she let it weigh her down. Her body was spasming less, the intense cocktail of panic and rage started to subside but it just left her void of anything. All that crying and noise just to be left exhausted by her own feelings. How was she supposed to go back to normal right now? She just wanted to lie there, motionless for hours on end.

She also wanted Luxx. This was new. She never wanted someone before. Even when she was recovering, she’d be alone and the first person she’d find would always be Sugar. She was the only one who understood. 

It was different this time, her brain started up again and craved Luxx. She glanced back at her phone, realising they’d sent her another message. Luxx: okay, text me if you need me Then another a few minutes later.

Luxx: i hope you’re okay

Then another one, guilt built up in spice as she realised how worried they must have been.

Luxx: sugar filled me in a bit, when you’re up to it you’re getting the biggest hug. 

That made her smile, Luxx was not a touchy person so her initiating affection with Spice was always something special. 

Spice: you can come now, the door’s unlocked just don’t turn the light back on please 

Luxx: you still want that hug? Spice: yeah 

She focused on her breathing as she waited, quelling the flipping in her stomach but still not completely at ease. Yes, she wanted Luxx. she craved their touch in a way she hadn’t felt before. But them seeing her like this? That was going to be a lot to handle. She didn’t seem phased, sugar had told her everything right? So it would be fine? Spice took a deeper breath, readying herself as she heard the door creak open. Luxx slid in, closing it softly and walking over to the mound where Spice was hidden.

They slowly sat down next to her, lifting the blanket in a way that if she wanted, Spice was more than able to stop. She let it happen, staring up at Luxx as they pulled it over her face and put it gently to the side. The only light in the room was coming from the closed curtains, it was enough for Luxx to see her face though, noticing the tear stains trailing down her cheeks and the way her lips seemed to quiver the second they made eyecontact no matter how brief it was. 

“Spice?” She spoke softly, that tone was a rare one. Spice swore Luxx never whispered like that, unless Marcia was asleep and they didn’t want to wake her up. There was warmth to it, a gentle sense of caring that made her hunch in on herself a little less. Spice tried to respond, the words were in her head but just wouldn’t come out no matter how hard she tried to croak out a reply, in the end she let out a high pitched grunt, looking apologetically at Luxx after. 

“Can’t talk?” She nodded, shifting closer to their body. 

“That’s okay, you wanna sit with me?” Spice squeaked at that, placing a hand on Luxx’s arm as a show of affection. She hummed as they scooped her up, letting the brunette curl up in their arms. Luxx shifted so they were both lying down, Spice curled into her, burrowing her head against their chest. 

“I got you, we can stay like this as long as you want, okay?” “Mmm.” Spice hummed back, squeezing Luxx’s hand. 

Luxx moved one of her arms to start stroking Spice’s hair, the other one staying firm around her waist. She brushed it back out of her face and gently scratched at her scalp in a way that she knew soothed the taller girl. She had a feeling they were going to be there a while, Spice’s body still holding a bit of tension. She would occasionally let out a muffled squeal, squeezing Luxx harder as if trying to convey something. They just continued to hold her, whispering soft words of affirmation when she seemed to get stressed. 

Neither of them had a concept of time, sitting together in silence in a dark room wasn’t exactly what Luxx had thought they were getting themself into but Spice seemed calmer with her around. Her body was relaxing finally, all the tensing and strain catching up to her as she groaned softly, leaning her head back to look up at Luxx before burrowing back into her chest. 

Spice stayed still after that, her breathing coming back down to a normal level. She poked Luxx’s arm gently grunting when she got a humm in response. “Something up?” She hummed again, prodding her hand this time. “Spice, I don’t know what that means.” Luxx couldn’t suppress a smile as Spice laughed lightly at that, propping herself up and tugging on their arm so Luxx would follow. She looked a lot calmer now, though still recovering. 

Her eyes drifted to her phone, discarded at the end of her bed so she’d stop thinking about it or knowing someone was messaging her. She realised then that her emotional support doll was tangled beneath the blanket she’d crawled out of to cuddle up to Luxx, leaning over to pick it up as they watched. She turned back to face her, staring her dead in the eye with an unreadable expression, somewhere between amusement and fear. She put the doll in Luxx’s hand, staring intently at her as she held it. “Your doll?” Spice nodded. “This one’s your favourite right? You had it since you were a kid?” Spice nodded again, smiling. “I have no idea why you put this in my hand.” Her lips twitched at that, almost a smile before she shook her head. 

“You’re very cryptic, you know that.” Spice grinned at that, curling herself back in on Luxx. She gestured from the doll to Luxx, looking up at her with the softest look in her eyes they had ever seen. 

“This is the emotional support doll isn’t it?” Luxx pondered, Spice letting out an affirmative humm in response. 

“So, I’m an emotional support doll? Person?” Spice’s face lit up at that, nodding enthusiastically. She seemed to enjoy their makeshift game of charades, squeezing their hand again to signal something Luxx didn’t quite understand. 

“That was a very convoluted way to communicate that, thank you.” Spice laughed again, still a muted giggle but some sort of progress out of her downcast state. 

Spice flinched as Luxx’s phone vibrated, burrowing her head back into their chest to shield her from the world. She moved to pick it up, careful not to displace Spice in her hiding spot. 

Sugar: is she okay? Luxx: i think so, she just played the strangest game of charadesSugar: yeah she’s better 

Spice made another noise, this one a lot harder to decipher. Luxx raised an eyebrow as she did it again, squeaking indignantly when Luxx gently poked her cheek. 

“You okay?” Another noise, this one closer to a growl, Spice stretched herself out before returning to her spot on their chest. She gestured to the lamp on the bedside table, glancing from Luxx to it as if to ask if she minded. “Girl, it’s your room. Do what you want.” Spice flicked the light on, her eyes never leaving Luxx. 

“Are you scared I’m going to do something?” Spice glanced away at that, her eyes focusing on something on the floor. 

“Hey. I’m not gonna do anything. I just want to make sure you’re okay. I’m not mad at you or anything, I just care about you.” Spice hesitated, moving her head back up to make eye contact before glancing elsewhere. Her hands moved to grab both of Luxx’s, squeezing them gently before letting out a sigh. 

“First time you’ve been like this around someone?” Spice nodded. “Even Sugar?” She shrugged. 

“Huh, you must really trust me.” That got another smile, Spice seeming to light up a little more. 

“You’re safe with me, okay Spice?” She glanced up, taken aback by the sincerity in their words. Spice seemed to search Luxx’s eyes for every emotion, she stared unmovingly for a few seconds before pulling them into a tight hug. They went back into a silence after that but Spice seemed happier. She finally opened her phone back up to scroll through social media for a bit, occasionally showing Luxx any memes she found with a proud smile. 

They finally got a look at the time, realising they’d been there for well over an hour. 

“Mhm mmm.” Spice hummed, emphasising it in a way that vaguely communicated what she was trying to say. 

“Was that a thank you?” Spice nodded, seemingly proud of Luxx for figuring that out.

“No worries, wasn’t going to let someone I care about suffer.” Spice fell quiet yet again, though her scrolling slowed this time, she let out a stifled yawn before burrowing back down against her friend. Luxx was at peace with being a pillow for her after all that, smiling to herself as Spice dozed off while nestled against her. Her body finally seemed to fully relax, a small smile on her lips every time Luxx ran their hand through her hair. 

Thankfully she was a heavy enough sleeper not to wake up when Sugar eventually returned, eyeing her sister up cautiously before looking to Luxx in relief. She kept her voice down before probing what exactly had happened. “I’m not really sure, she just seemed upset and couldn’t talk. We spent a while sat together and I think she just needed some company and time to decompress. Has this happened before?” “Not since we’ve moved to college, though she would totally blow up sometimes when our parents kept asking her about things. Like they’d be going on and on about her failing math and she’d just shout and shout until she just completely shut down. I learnt pretty quickly to leave her alone when she’s like that. She flipped out at me once, just kept hitting things until I left the room” Sugar spoke animatedly, her eyes quickly darting to her phone to show something. Luxx’s heart sank at that, surely she hadn’t-

It was a picture of a broken hairbrush, one that looked far too sturdy to snap like that without some serious strength. Thank god she wasn’t about to show a video of Spice freaking out, some people were truly evil, filming shit like that when someone was clearly distressed. 

“She’s been doing better since we moved, a lot more sociable too. She had really bad social anxiety in highschool that’s why I was surprised when she mentioned she’d made a friend without me. I used to make friends for both of us, but even then we didn’t have many.” Sugar continued, frowning as she recalled their experience. They both seemed so light and fun all the time it never occurred to Luxx there could be a lot of repressed trauma under that. Sure they’d seen the way Spice hesitated when Luxx had a go at someone, seeming to curl in on herself any time anyone raised their voice near her. She was always quiet when people made a comment about her, Luxx always jumping to her defence before she could say anything. They’d figured she was shy, which wasn’t wrong. But to know there was a lot more too it that Spice would never want to go into? She just hoped she could feel comfortable enough to not have to keep that guard up around them. “Me neither, people were just rude though. Not worth my time.” Luxx’s flippant attitude was betrayed by her words, sombre as she kept her eyes trained on Spice, smiling to herself as she shifted, letting out a quiet hum before falling still once again.  “Yeah, people here are nicer but it’s hard. It’s like we’ve only ever really had each other.” “You’ve got other people now. I promise.” 

“Just be good to her, she needs it.” Sugar’s words were punctuated by a small smile, as if she knew something they didn’t. Weird. “What do you mean?” “Oh you know. I’ve seen the way you look at her.” Sugar glanced from Luxx to the sleeping Spice in her lap, smirking and suggestively raising her eyebrows. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” They played it off coolly, though internally panicked. Was it that obvious? Spice was too oblivious to ever realise their feelings but for someone else to see it? Not good. “Luxx, you’re completely whipped for her. Literally who else would you let spoon you in your sleep. I saw that by the way.” Sugar’s eyes lit up with a mischievous glee, scrolling through her photos to pull up one of the pair of them a few weeks ago, asleep in Spice’s bed, Luxx’s head on her chest, Spice’s arms wrapped around her. That was not exactly platonic looking. Fuck. Luxx was about to fire back when they froze at Spice making a sound, shifting her body slightly before groaning. Her eyes fluttered sleepily, looking up at Luxx with a smile as she realised where she was. She glanced at Sugar, mirroring a similar expression. Sugar glanced at the pair of them, smirking even more as Spice sat up, leaning her head on their shoulder before wrapping her arms around their waist. 

“You doing okay now?” Spice blinked, shrugging as if that would communicate every thought in her brain. 

“Did you break anything?” Sugar asked, having walked from her bed to hover over Spice. She laughed at that, shaking her head before rolling her eyes. Sugar leaned in to take Spice from Luxx’s grasp and hug her, whispering something into her ear that Luxx didn’t catch. Whatever it was it made Spice perk up, nodding at Sugar. 

“Oh, she’s not going to talk for the rest of the day, she never does.” Sugar spoke up, Spice pouting in response. 

Her face got momentarily serious, as if she was concentrating hard on something before she looked back to Luxx and opened her mouth. Her brow furrowed, staring hard as if she could communicate telepathically.

“Fuck.” Her voice was small, barely audible though Luxx caught onto it, when they realised that was her response to Sugar all she could do was laugh, the other twin glaring in faux anger. 

“Bitch! I’ve been worried about you all day and THAT’S how you respond!” Sugar looked at her in shock, rolling her eyes. Spice grinned mischievously, letting out a quiet laugh that only grew as Luxx looked at her with a similar sense of shock “You’re lucky I like you.”

Another small laugh, Luxx counted that as a win. Spice seemed at peace with her, something that was totally not going to be on her mind for weeks. Not at all.