#I just needed something happy and sexy to write cause my canon missing scene thing was poking my recently resuscitated mental health

[charmwasjess]

"whats this I'm hearing now about the pollen?" That is an interesting question and I would be very keen to know the answer. 😁 Shoot, Jess.

EHEHEHE I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD ASK and also, from my dear @abigailspinach <3

It's my take on the sex pollen trope, except that the actual amounts of any sex pollen in the story are questionable, and Sifo-Dyas and Dooku are idiots. I'm not sure graphic smut + humor is an actual genre, but I'm trying:

“Into the shower.” 

“What.” 

Impatient, Dooku began to pull at his tunic, lifting it up over Sifo-Dyas’s head. 

“What are you doing?!” His voice was muffled from the fabric. “I really don’t feel like another round of sex is going to help right now–” 

“I’m not trying to make love to you, you fool! Take off your pants!” 

Sifo-Dyas produced a kind of squawk, reminiscent of their earlier bird assailant, as Dooku began to undo his belt. 

[ambiguousdisorderken]

in your expert opinion what are some of the most destiel-heavy episodes of spn? i stopped watching around season 7 and have no interest in engaging w the plot of the show at all but i’m in the mood for some gay yearning ykwim

Hi anon! Thank you for reaching out to me about this, I’m, no-joke, very flattered. I’d seen a couple posts on this same question, very thorough and detailed lists on Destiel-centric episodes, but at the moment I cannot find any of them, that would’ve answered your request much faster. So, in advance, sorry, my reply is probably coming in extremely late, but I did write this from scratch, so yeah.

Even though storylines in SPN can be very shitty and hollow, I do feel that to get the full Destiel experience -that long-drawn yearning- one would have to watch the entirety of the show, even if Cas isn’t in the episode or if there’s no explicit mention of their relationship/bond because it gives you a better understanding of them as characters and of how their relationship affects the narrative.

Now, you mentioned you stopped around S7, which is completely understandable and justified given the Dick plot game was very weak and, in my opinion, annoying (so little Cas!). I’m going to start listing from S7 in case you want to refresh your SPN before jumping straight into unseen episodes. Also, since you mentioned no interest in the plot and are specifically craving those sweet crumbs of gay yearning, I’ll skip most one-sided / too subtle episodes and cut to the chase.

Lastly, I hate spoiling things, but you’ve probably seen it all on Tumblr. I tried to keep the episodes’ descriptions short, as it might come in useful. Stuck to key words, quotes and/or little comments.

 Season 7

7x01 – Meet the New Boss: Godstiel, sincere apology. Cas: “I'm gonna find some way to redeem myself to you.”

7x02 – Hello, Cruel World: Mourning. Trench coat melancholy. The heart-wrenching eulogy: “Dumb son of a bitch.”

7x17 – The Born-Again Identity: Emmanuel!Cas, reunion, longing, hurt.

7x21 – Reading is Fundamental: Honey!Cas, hug, hurt, reunion, that painful SORRY (board game) scene.

7x23 – Survival of the Fittest: Honey!Cas, forgiveness, adorable, wified Cas. Dean hits us with: “Nobody cares that you're broken, Cas!" but also “I'd rather have you, cursed or not.”

Season 8 (this season is so good and Destiel is the driving motor of it, I swear. If you can, watch it complete.)

8x01 – We Need to Talk About Kevin: Dean in Purgatory looking for the angel.  Cas is referred to as “your [Dean’s] angel.”

8x02 – What’s Up, Tiger Mommy?: HUG!!!, Purgatory reunion, face touch, very romantic. Monster: “ You'll find your angel there.” //  Dean: “Let me bottom-line it for you. I'm not leaving here without you.”

8x05 – Blood Brother: Cas vs. Benny cat fight lol. Dean: “Cas... we're gonna shove your ass back through the eye of that needle if it kills all three of us.”

8x07 – A Little Slice of Kevin: Cas comes back from Purgatory, but before that Dean starts seeing him in places. Very tragic; hallucinating your dead significant other trope. Has That boner scene. Dean: “I did everything I could to get you out! EVERYTHING!” Cas helps Dean see what truly happened in Purgatory and not his self-altered memories. PACKED!

8x08 – Hunteri Heroici: Hilarious, romantic, intimate. Dean and Cas have an heart to heart. They actually communicate. Cas “I’ll watch over you.”

8x10 Torn and Frayed: They work a case together, and when I say heart eyes…

8x17 – Goodbye Stranger: THIS. EPISODE. Dean “I need you.”

8x19 – Taxi Driver: Separation. Naomi to Dean: "You're hoping Castiel will return to you. I admire your loyalty; I only wish he felt the same way."

8x22 – Clip Show: Lack of trust, hurt, tense interactions. Romantic too (basically, Cas gets Dean an apology basket).

8x23 – Sacrifice: Meaningful conversation and a gay couple hit by Cupid parallel. Dean “So this is it? E.T goes home?"

 Season 9

9x01 – I think I’m Gonna Like it Here: Dean prays to Cas IN.A.CHAPEL. Worry, longing, separation. Dean “Please, man, I need you here.”

9x03 – I’m No Angel: Human!Cas and jealous!Dean.

9x06 – Heaven Can’t Wait: Human!Cas TEXT-BOOK LONGING. GAY AS FUCK. Gazing, touching, they even TALK (for real).

9x09 – Holy Terror: Adorable Cas, flirty vibes, happyish, funny. Cas: “Cas is back in town!”

9x10 – Road Trip: Cas comforts Dean, Cas and Crowley bitching at each other, overall protective!Cas.

9x18 – Metafiction. Cas finds out about the Mark of Cain.

9x21 – King of the Damned: Hug, strong boyfriends vibes.

9x22 – Stairway to Heaven: Cas gives up an entire army, for Dean. Metatron about Cas “He's in love………………………. with humanity.”

9x23  – Do You Believe in Miracles?: At this point, it’s canon stated that Cas will do anything and lose everything if that means saving Dean. Metatron to Cas “You draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human, right?”

 Season 10

10x01 – Black: Demon!Dean and sick/brokenhearted Cas in a slutty robe missing his man.

10x03 – Soul Survivor: ICONIC. Angel on Demon action! Cas turns down Hannah because he’s too gay and in love. Intimate Deancas talk.

10x05 – Fan Fiction: No Cas, but Destiel references. 

10x09 – The Things We Left Behind: That.Lunch.Date. Deancas introduction to co-parenting.

10x14 – The Executioner’s Song: We get Daddy Murder aka Cain. This is a Pivotal episode to understand Dean’s character development. Plus, it has Deancas interactions.

10x16 – Paint It Black: No Cas, but Dean opens up in confessionary; repressed BISEXUAL AS FUCK.

10x18 – Book of the Damned: Charlie meets Cas. Gay energies everywhere. Cute domestic little scene.

10x20 – Angel Heart: PARENTING! Essential to understand Cas from this point forward.

10x22 – The Prisoner: Just… just watch it. One of THEE Destiel episodes.

10x23 – Brother’s Keeper: No Deancas interactions but it’s the finale, and I recommend watching it because next season takes off literally right from here. No time jumps.

 Season 11

11x02 – Form and Void: Could skip to the very end which is when Cas comes back.

11x03 – The Bad Seed: Cursed!Cas. Dean takes care of him, even wraps him in a blanket. He also cradles his face. Extreme Hurt/Comfort. Jacting joices rejoice.

11x10 – The Devil in the Details: Could skip but has Casifer in it. Interesting to see his dynamic with Dean.

11x18 – Hell’s Angel: Casifer. Dean "It? It's not an it, Sam, it's Cas!"

11x23 – Alpha and Omega: Huggg! Cas willing to go on a guaranteed suicide mission with Dean. Very tender and sad.

 Season 12

12x02 – Keep Calm and Carry On: ANOTHER HUG! Dean presents his boyfriend to his mom<3 Soft and romantic.

12x09 – First Blood: Reunion hug<3, Cas pining… as in he counts his every minute without Dean.

12x10 – Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets: Direct parallel with canon couple. Crystal-clear mutual affection. One of the best. Angel Ishim to Cas about Dean “I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna cure you of your human weakness same way I cured my own… by cutting it out.”

12x12 – Stuck in the Middle with You: A dying Cas confesses his love. “I love you. I love all of you.”

12x19 – The Future: We find out Dean gave Cas a MIXTAPE!!! Very romantic and full of yearning, also worry and what could be seen as a betrayal (ish…).

12x23 – All Along the Watch Tower: Hands down, one of the most distressing Destiel episodes. Cas dies.

 Season 13

13x01 – Lost and Found: This is the worst because you have Dean trying to assimilate Cas’ death. Core of Dean’s widow’s arc. Jack introduction, that’s their new kid.

13x02 – The Rising Son: Widow’s arc (you could skip it, but why would you?).

13x03 – Patience: Widow’s arc (you could skip it, but why would you?). Dean to Sam “He manipulated him, he made him promises, said, ‘paradise on earth’ and Cas bought it and you know what that got him? It got him dead! Now you might be able to forget about that, but I can’t!”

13x04 – The Big Empty: Continuation of widow’s arc and Cas wakes up in the Empty. The Empty to Cas: "I know who you love. There's nothing for you back there." // Dean to Sam “I need you to keep the faith, for both of us. ‘Cause right now, I… Right now, I don’t believe in a damn thing.”

13x05 – Advanced Thanatology: Suicidal and hopeless Dean gets his win. Cas comes back. Gives me the chills.

13x06 – Tombstone: COWBOY BOYFRIENDS!

13x14 – Good Intentions: Happy and fun Destiel scene. So Very Married.

13x23 – Let The Good Times Roll: Season finale, Dean talks about retiring (plans include Cas of course) and just very nice to see them interact.

Season 14

14x03 – The Scar: Reunion.

14x08 – Byzantium: Deanand Cas dealing with their child’s death, then bringing him back by Cas making a deal with the Empty. IMPORTANT EPISODE.

14x09 – The Spear: Cas uses the royal We – married behavior.

14x10 – Nihilism: Dean is stuck in his own mind, and Cas and Sam try to bring him back. Cas “Please, you have to -- you have to try to remember, because the people in your life -- in your real life, out there -- we need you to come back.”

14x12 – Prophet and Loss: Dean gets his very own Dr. Sexy, aka Dr. Cas.

14x14 – Ouroboros: Basically another date (their kid tags along) and They TALK. Very intimate and established marriage vibes.

14x18 – Absence: Shits starts to go south. [ Dean: “Who cares what Jack said? We don't know what happened! But I swear, if he did something to her, if she is -- (points to Castiel) Then you're dead to me. (Castiel looks crushed after Dean says that).]

14x20 – Moriah: Tense and very upsetting. Relationship very damaged.

 Season 15 (I would advise watching the entire season because it relies heavily on Destiel. They’re the heart and the emotional motor leading the plot onwards.)

15x01 – Back and To The Future: Deancas’ in the aftermath of their kid’s death. Tension gets worse.

15x02 – Raising Hell: Tension rises, this is very intense. Cas “Dean. You asked, "What about all of this is real?" We are.”

15x03 – The Rupture: Breaking point ends in divorce.

15x06 – Golden Time: Painful phone call which speaks volumes about the current state of their relationship at the time. Also, good to see where they’re standing and how they’re coping.

15x08 – Our Father Who Aren’t in Heaven: Strained relationship so obvious they’re offered couples’ therapy.

15x09 – The Trap: MASTERPIECE. Back to Purgatory. Can (and is) taken as Dean’s love confession (because it is). 

15x12 – Galaxy Brain: So married. Little domestic date, you can see LOVE written in their faces.

15x13 – Destiny’s Child: AU!Dean and Sam. Not a yearning episode per se, but AU!Dean? SO GAY.

15x17 – Unity: God reveals that the only act of free will in any universe he ever created has been Cas choosing Dean.

15x18 – Despair: Cas confesses his love to Dean.

[abigailnussbaum]

How to do Garak/Bashir in Canon DS9

Yesterday there was a fun tweet asking people how they would remake DS9 if they were given the option today.

Which led to some fun discussions (you can see my answers here). Obviously one thing that pretty much everyone said was “canon Garak/Bashir”. That’s generally considered one of the show’s big missed opportunities, with both Andrew J. Robinson and some of the show’s producers expressing regret over never having gone there. But it did get me thinking: how would you tell this sort of story? Because look, it’s one thing to write Garak/Bashir in fanfic, filling in gaps in the canon or changing the entire tone of the story to suit your ‘ship. But if you’re retelling DS9 along basically the same lines - the end of the Cardassian occupation, the discovery of the wormhole, the Jem’hadar, the Dominion, the war with Cardassia - and with the personalities of the characters and the tone of the show largely unchanged, how do you fit Garak/Bashir into that story?

There are some obvious issues with trying to work this ship into the show’s story and overall tone. For one thing, Bashir is a Starfleet officer. We like to make fun of his early, annoying incarnation, but even in that form he is clearly a decent, principled man with strong values. It’s one thing to flirt (literally or figuratively) with a mysterious, sexy spy, but getting into a relationship with him would not only be stupid, it would run counter to Bashir’s image of himself. You could go in a dark direction with this - Garak seduces Bashir purely as a way of gaining power over him (and perhaps out of force of habit); maybe they end up in a kind of Hannibal/Will relationship. But that doesn’t seem sustainable in the long-term, or congruent with the type of show DS9 was. Bashir can’t trust Garak, and Garak has done things that Bashir would consider disgusting. That’s something you have to take into consideration if you want to write them as a long-term couple.

It’s also worth considering that, as much as the Garak/Bashir pairing lingers over the fannish perception of the show, it’s not actually that prominent in the series itself. The last episode that I would call a Garak/Bashir story, “Our Man Bashir”, is an early S4 episode, well before the Dominion War happens. And Garak is absent for a lot of the later developments in Bashir’s life - “Doctor Bashir, I Presume” (you’d think Garak, with his complicated relationship with his father, would have something to say about Julian having been illegally genetically enhanced by his parents) or “Statistical Probabilities” (a troupe of savants who claim to be able to predict the course of the war would surely be of interest to Garak). In most of these stories, Bashir is accompanied by O’Brien, a much safer option as far as suppressed sexual tension is concerned (it should go without saying that this feels like a deliberate choice on the show’s part, to undermine any idea of a Garak/Bashir relationship). Meanwhile, Bashir is absent from most of Garak’s important Dominion War stories - his relationship with Ziyal and her death, his position in Damar’s rebellion, “In the Pale Moonlight”. So if you’re going to retell DS9 with Garak/Bashir as a real ship, you'd have to rewrite a lot of these stories to take that into account.

Finally, you’ve got the show’s ending, which is an extremely dark one for Garak, who gets everything he thought he wanted - his position restored, a place of honor in Cardassian society - just at the point where Cardassia is decimated and, in his words, left dead. Working a romance with Bashir into this ending would be tricky, and risks ending up with the final scenes of Man of Steel - two people making out atop a mass grave.

(Obviously, I’m taking it as a given that this hypothetical version of DS9 is much, much better at writing mature, complicated romantic relationships than the real one. Most actual DS9 romance was painfully juvenile, and the one exception, Sisko/Kasidy, was also an extremely low-drama ship - Sisko literally sent Kasidy to jail and the next time they met they were like “so, that was a bit of a bump in the road; dinner later?” It should go without saying that Garak/Bashir would not be a low-drama ship, so the writing would need to be there to support it.)

Anyway, complicated but obviously not impossible. This is what I’ve come up with for how I would rewrite the show with Garak/Bashir as an ongoing couple. I’m sure there’s plenty of fanfic with other, better ideas.

To start with, lose the claustrophobia business. Or, you know, keep it, but the reason Garak was expelled from the Obsidian Order and banished from Cardassia is that he’s gay. (To be fair, I feel like “claustrophobia” was pretty clearly code even in the original show.) A lot of people in the upper echelons of the Cardassian hierarchy know this - Dukat certainly knows - and miss no opportunity to harass him about it.

Obviously, in this version of the show Cardassia is deeply queerphobic. I don’t think this is a huge leap. Cardassian society is deeply conformist, and family-oriented in a fascist-adjacent sort of way that prioritizes the father as the master of the home. It’s hard to imagine a society like that tolerating deviations from gender norms, and it seems fair to assume that reprecussions for such deviations would be severe.

Garak doesn’t actually have a problem with this - or at least, not that he expresses. Garak’s defining trait is that he believes in, and loves, Cardassia deeply, and espouses its chauvinistic (in both senses of the word) values to anyone who will listen. But at the same time, he’s smart enough (and enough of an outsider) to know how hollow and destructive those values really are. So Garak will explain to anyone who challenges him on it that Cardassian homophobia is right and proper, while knowing that he has fallen victim to it himself.

Bashir is out. Though “out” might not be the right word because the Federation is so nonchalant about queerness that the notion of being closeted doesn’t really exist anymore (this is a version of Star Trek where we actually follow through on the promise of a more progressive future). But at any rate, to Bashir and the other Starfleet characters, him being gay is so unremarkable that it doesn’t even come up until his and Garak’s frienship is already established. This deeply shocks Garak - he knew humans were perverted, but the good Doctor, his friend? Bashir, meanwhile, wastes no opportunity to needle Garak about his society’s barbaric homophobia (Garak: “humans may be prone to such... urges, but Cardassians are made of finer stuff”; Bashir: *rolls eyes so hard he can see the back of his head*). But at the same time, and without being entirely willing to admit it to himself, Garak is intrigued.

And so we continue for about five seasons. Garak flirts with Bashir, partly because he thinks this is a way of unsettling the good Doctor, but really because he wants him. Bashir assumes that it’s all an act, and plays along with it a little because, hey, sexy spy. But he never imagines that it could go somewhere real, and probably wouldn’t follow through if it did.

And then Bashir gets replaced with a Changeling (this is a version of DS9 where that idea was seeded throughout the first half of the fifth season instead of being decided on five minutes before “In Purgatory’s Shadow” started shooting). And the changeling takes one look at Garak, sees an obvious in, and seduces him. Which clearly causes some awkwardness when Garak finds the real Bashir in a Dominion prison camp.

Bashir finds out. Worf tells him (this is a version of Worf who isn’t weirdly sexist and judgmental about other people’s sex lives). (Bashir: “why is Garak being so weird around me?”; Worf: “he and the fake you were doing it”; Bashir: “what”; Worf: “they were boning”; Bashir: “WHAT”; Worf: “they were engaging in sexual intercourse”; Bashir: “that's not possible. Garak only flirts with me to keep me on my toes”; Worf: *shrugs* “if that’s what you want to call it”.)

So now Bashir is upset because he’s spent the last five years bugging Garak about Cardassian homophobia and it turns out that Garak was a victim of it, plus he’s now been victimized by someone wearing Bashir’s face. And Garak is upset because he let his attraction to Bashir (Garak: “my base lust!”) blind him to the fact that his friend had been replaced by a changeling, leading to him being comromised as an agent (I will leave it as an exercise to the readers which one bothers him more). And, well, if you can’t get from there to romance on your own, you may not have read enough fanfic in your life.

Then you get the war, and honestly, I don’t know. You could do an on/off thing. You could make it a very casual relationship in between the two of them trying not to die and/or lose the Alpha Quadrant to the Dominion. You could have Bashir say “fuck it, I might die tomorrow and this guy makes me happy; who cares if my boyfriend is a liar and a murderer”. You could even go the Worf/Jadzia route and have them muse romantically about having a life together after the war. But either way, they spend more time around each other than they did in the original series.

But! When Garak goes back to Cardassia to help Damar’s rebellion, there’s a lot of tension between them, because Damar heard from Dukat that Garak is a pervert (you could still keep Ziyal’s death and Garak’s anger at Damar over it; those two always made more sense as friends anyway). And then it turns out that there’s an entire Cardassian queer underground, and in typical Cardassian fashion they’ve turned it into a whole spy network with operatives at every level of government. (Garak: “why did you never approach me?”; queer Cardassian underground: “dude, have you met you?”) And they’re willing to work with Damar if he promises that in the new Cardassia, they will no longer be persecuted (I think this dovetails pretty nicely with Garak’s observation that Damar needs to be disillusioned about the flaws of Cardassian society). So all of a sudden Garak is looking at a future where what he is doesn’t make him a pariah anymore.

And then you get to the destruction of Cardassia, and, again, I’m not sure how that combines with Garak/Bashir. The entire ending of DS9 is pretty rough on romantic pairings in general, but at least when Kira/Odo and Sisko/Kasidy break up, it’s bittersweet, and in service of other new beginnings. Garak’s ending is just bleak, and I’m not sure how you deal with a romance on top of that. The best I can come up with is Bashir saying “yes, this is horrible, but you can rebuild, and if you need my help with that, I’m not far”, leaving a door open for them to reconnect in the future.

Thoughts?

[thereinafter]

Letter for Chocolate Box 2020 (cut for major wall of text; fandoms I requested are Dragon Age, Tortall, Darkest Dungeon, Original Work)

Hello, dear chocolatier, thanks for creating something for me!  I’m thereinafter (isyche) on AO3.

I like both fic (any rating you want to write) and art (gen or romance or implied sex fine, no explicit porn), Prompts below are copied from my signup, followed by a long general likes list and then DNWs.

Dragon Age

Cassandra/Leliana: I love them and their long history/intimidating outsides/romantic insides/right hand-left hand balance a lot. some prompt ideas: a) on a mission pre-DAI and some forced-intimacy or h/c trope pushes them to admit/act on feelings b) escalating personal notes attached to official reports c) sneaked moments away from Skyhold  d) fighting back to back e) either one convincing the other to take a break and do something fun, in her own way. Or anything from my likes list you find inspiring, get-together or established. For art: I’d love them being romantic or formidable together however you want to draw it.

Leliana/Josephine: I also love their history and friendship, and how Josephine can potentially light up Leliana’s tendency to darkness, and also how Leliana is playful with/protective of her. There are a lot of established-relationship missing-scene type scenarios I’d like for them, e.g., an excursion to Val Royeaux from Skyhold, a dance together at Halamshiral, Josie waiting up for Leliana to finish spy business, distracting each other from frustrating work, managing difficult guests. Or being drawn back together when Josie comes to the Inquisition after having been in the past. Or, again, anything else from my likes you’re into. I’d be delighted by art of them as well, if you want to illustrate any of these ideas or just draw them being cute.

and some gen ideas I’ve thought about recently and would like to read:

Cassandra & Vivienne: Since Vivienne is a knight-enchanter and thus technically a melee fighter, I’m curious about how and where she trains or has in the past for that, and I’d be interested to see her and Cassandra bond in some way through testing themselves against each other.

Female Hawke & Leliana & Morrigan: These three could have all potentially met in Lothering before the Blight, so write me something about that? Maybe they all get into a scrape together and have to cooperate? Maybe it was caused by Hawke’s or Morrigan’s magic?

Morrigan & Sera: I once drew Morrigan being amused by Sera stealing templar breeches and ever since I’ve kind of wanted that fic. Morrigan is entertained by Sera’s pranks on targets she dislikes and offers to help? Sera is suspicious/scared of her but eventually decides she’s all right? (Sera makes friends with Kieran?)

Tortall

Keladry of Mindelan & Baby Griffin: Having recently read the Kel books, I was really charmed by her heroic efforts to care for the griffin baby until its parents are found, and I’d like a little fic exploring that more, or maybe it coming back to find her later on? Daine and/or Alanna could be involved too if you like. I also am pretty sure this would make for adorable art.

Darkest Dungeon

I feel like there are potential stories around a lot of the mechanics in this game: the quirks and stress and breakdowns and need to recover through drinking or sex or gambling or religion, the weird trinkets and cultist groups, why new adventurers keep showing up to get fed into the dungeon. So, with this fandom I’m interested in fic playing with those things and building on what’s implied in the game (or art along those lines illustrating some offscreen scene, or creating a shippy moment).

I picked these three pairings because I thought they made for interesting dynamics, but if you want to include other characters or enemies, go for it (and use whatever names you want).

Antiquarian/Grave Robber: bonding over an interest in treasure and desire to stay alive and out of the melee? Getting lost on an unadvised side trip in the ruins?

Arbalest/Shieldbreaker: Arbalest takes Shieldbreaker under her wing and tries to cover her in combat/patch her up/help with her nightmares?

Hellion/Vestal: opposites attract, Vestal has impure thoughts about Hellion, and/or healer/fighter h/c?

Original Work

I pictured all of these in fantasy settings when nominating them, but some could also work as SF/space opera or historical.

Female Adventurer Lost in the Snow/Female Fire Spirit: Obviously she needs warming up, however you want to take that (does the spirit warm her and let her go like a grateful one night stand? Or a darker take where the woman lets the spirit consume her and make her one of them? or both at different times in her life?)

Female Armorsmith/Female Warrior Who Needs Frequent Repairs: This could go in either a funny “why do you come in here so much” or an angsty “why do you get hurt so often” direction and I’d like either (or both).

Female Knight/Female Bath Attendant with a Crush: I like knights and requited crushes and the sort of caretaking involved in baths, and would be happy with any cute/romantic or comfort/solace or sexy take on this combination.

Female Court Painter/Impatient Princess Sitting for a Painting: Maybe the princess is a flirty rake and the painter is a serious type with no time for her nonsense but secretly charmed, or vice versa? Or they keep falling out over how the portrait should go and then making up? Or they're in a secret relationship and the impatience is because it's the only time they can see each other?

Grumpy Lonely Sorceress/Female Courtesan She Hires for a Ritual: I pictured this as a lighthearted story where the situation starts awkward and ends more fun than expected for them. Why does the sorceress need to try this particular ritual/spell? (unexpectedly necessary for something she’s researching?) does it succeed? do they decide to collaborate again? up to you.

Anchoress/Woman Outside Her Cell: I’d be happy with either a historical medieval setting or a fantasy/SF invented religion. Here for the pining and inability to touch that the premise suggests; would prefer a hopeful ending to a super bleak one.

-----------

General likes (mainly a fic-oriented list, but if you do art for me and want to incorporate something here, great):

In case you want more inspiration in addition to the above. Take from it as you wish, all these things are good alone or combined

for both gen and shipfic: Lighthearted (romantic or friendship) fluff and humor Glimpses of how the characters manage everyday life stuff in canons where the focus is more on big dramatic events Canon divergence AUs in the “what if x event in canon turned out differently” sense Casefic if the characters do cases or missions or short adventures Epistolary or “found documents” stories, and other unconventional story structures Time loop stories, Rashomon-style stories, and other kinds of variations on a theme (including “five times” fic) Worldbuilding/exploration of the canon world and backstory, especially parts unexplored in the canon; also, in-universe stories, songs, mythologies, histories, etc. Holidays and celebrations and balls, masquerade or not, and dancing, romantic or not Characters doing things in disguise, whether they’re good or bad at it Heists and rescues/jailbreaks Court plotting, intrigue, spying Road or sea trips/wilderness survival situations Swordfights, duels, tournaments, sparring, training for all kinds of fighting Characters making things for others, whether it’s art or music or crafting or food or magic or whatever, and giving gifts Artists (in any art form), artistic rivalries, artist/muse dynamics, artists inspiring each other Competence and being very good at what they do (but perhaps awkward or lost in other contexts); relatedly, learning/practicing new skills

additionally for shipfic: Angst with happy endings Pining, preferably requited in the end Repressed feelings and extended UST, especially between working partners who are busy with something more important Loyalty/dedication/faithfulness/devotion, us against the world, knight/queen dynamics (either one-way or where both consider themselves the knight to the other), bodyguarding, love conflicting with other loyalties, noble self-denial and sacrifice, courtly love Stoicism and hidden feelings/bad at feelings but has a lot, or good at feelings and good at hiding them Secret/forbidden relationships as a source of angst and/or for the excitement of sneaking around Hurt/comfort, rescuing each other, fighting beside each other Snuggling/bathing/dressing/playing with hair/other caretaking Forced intimacy tropes like bedsharing, huddling for warmth, fake dating, marriage of convenience, handcuffed together, dreamsharing/psychic bonds, bodyswap Longtime friends to lovers, old friends meeting again, old enemies who aren’t really anymore and have to admit they like each other, rivals who respect each other Ascetic/hedonist or repressed/libertine or inexperienced/more experienced pairings

for sex scenes: cuddling, kissing, laughing, eroticized hands and voices, clothed/semi-clothed sex, complicated undressing, talking whether emotional or joking or dirty, curiosity/discovery, playfulness/inventiveness, eagerness/desperation, being overwhelmed by feelings, having to keep silent or hold still, interruptions and delayed gratification and intentional teasing/drawing things out, body worship, sex against walls, informal mild kink (e.g., tying up, holding down, blindfolding, taking direction, scratching/marking, tearing clothes, mutual roughness), sexy letter writing, one fantasizing about the other, decadence, voyeurism/exhibitionism, writing/painting on skin, sex pollen, magical or magic-enhanced sex

------------------------

DNWs: unrequested setting AUs (like high school or coffee shop), non-canonical/unrequested polyamory, non-canonical/unrequested pregnancy and kids, non-canonical nicknames infidelity (unless it’s something like escaping a forced or political marriage) sexual violence/rape (eroticized/described in detail; I’m OK with, e.g., a character being a survivor or hunting down a rapist) a/b/o, formalized bdsm, daddy/mommy kink, underage, incest, shit/urine/vomit/spitting

[elsa-of-arrendelle]

If Destiel shippers are allowed to post why they ship Destiel, I am allowed to say why I don’t.

I’ll point out that, yes, I’m religious. I’m a Christian of the LDS church and I believe that marriage and sexual relations should be between a man and a woman. But that’s not the big reason I don’t ship Destiel (Heck, I think Cecil and Carlos are *neat* and freaking adorable). 

I don’t ship Destiel because of what it cancels from the characters, the healthiness of the proposed relationship, and the effect it’s had on the fandom over the years.

Destiel is a ship that began as a fanon ship and still is. The biggest promotion is fans on tumblr, the lip-service and stories are written by fans, the scenes are either drawn by or edited from available sources by fans. The writers clearly have no intent of making it canon and the actors (mainly Jensen cause he’s tired of the constant peppering) have said that Destiel does not exist in the show.

The character-destroying reasons I don’t ship Destiel:

There is a canonically straight man who watches soap operas, cleans, cooks, has worn pink satin panties, drinks flavored water, listens to kids, show empathy, cries, is unafraid to show affection to his male friends and family, mother-hens his friends and family, and listens to his own moral code. It bashes so many stereotypes it makes me want to cry of happiness. Turning Dean Bi changes “breaking useless gender roles and stereotypes” to “Oh, well yeah, he’s gay so that makes sense now.” and degrades how revolutionary his character already is against mainstream media.

There’s also an angel who doesn’t care about sexuality more than a person’s actions (a slap to Westboro Baptists) with no personal reasons for it other than his conscience. He is sweet and kind but can also be awe-inspiring and ruthless against his enemies. Has immense power but tries to use it to help people, even in small acts of service which takes down the idea that abilities are only useful if they’re out beating up bad guys over doing what you can no matter how small.

And I refuse to ignore Sam because he is not going to be demoted to a cheerleader for Destiel. Sam is kind, passionate, and endures immense hardships and is just as valid as Dean or Cas. He is his own powerhouse and while I’m certain that he supports his brother being happy and healthy in any relationship that Dean might choose, he shouldn’t be ignored or downsized as a character to make way for a new romance plot which will inevitably happen because guys, this is tv land. It always happens.

Meg. Megstiel was actually canon. Yet, during the same time that people were still trying to make it Destiel. Meg was literally making out with Cas and it was not one-sided. I have seen more romance - proper, healthy romance, mind you - and positive character development between these two than between Dean and Cas. Castiel would compliment her poetically and she had her pet-name for him and would fuss over him and cared for him when Dean didn’t because the Winchesters had their own problems to deal with.

^^^ Related to this but Destiel shippers have actually stolen a lot from Megstiel which is just messed up. The Pizza Man was based on Megstiel. The idea of having a “unicorn” is from Megstiel. Could you please use your own cliche’s in your fanfics and headcanons??? You can’t think of any that you have on your own?? That’s messed up. If you can’t write a story without stealing a competing ship’s motifs to pass as your own, you probably shouldn’t be writing and should be researching your own dang ship instead.

Dean and Castiel’s relationship would be toxic, in case you didn’t notice. It very nearly is right now. Cas is not and never will be Dean’s top priority. He’s still a priority for sure, but he’s not Sam. A healthy relationship has either each other on equal standing whether their first priority is each other or God. Goals, real-time emotions, or anything else too changeable are easily toppled. The reason Dean and Lisa worked out for a year was because Sam was not an option for Dean to prioritize anymore but the second he came back, the relationship started (sadly) to fall apart and Dean lost that stability. Unless Sam is also Cas’ #1 priority, their relationship is going to capsize faster than the Titanic without interference from Balthazar.

Not to mention, when Dean is stressed about losing Sam/failing the world/problems, he dishes out on Castiel. Cas is a strange character in that he is so old and has so much knowledge but he’s simultaneously like a child for the first several seasons because he’s missing so much social development. Two emotionally unbalanced factors in a relationship either balance each other out perfectly or they go up like a nuclear reactor. Sometimes it’s immediate and other times it builds up, but Dean and Cas initially clash and still clash on many major decisions. They don’t balance each other, they make the other alarmed by their unpredictability and recklessness.

Dean does care about Cas, but he’s not used to him or expressing concern to anyone beyond Sam, John, and Bobby. He’s bad at expressing negative feelings in an okay way. I’m not going to be the anti-shipper who paints Dean as some kind of abusive monster cause I love Dean and they twist him out of context too, but Dean has said some hurtful things and failed on the supportive front for Cas several times because Cas is not his main priority. Similarly, Cas has shown no interest in becoming a human, he enjoys human interaction and helping humans. He’s not some Ariel out to be ‘part of our world’ and S12 had him taking up Joshua on the deal to allow him back into Heaven. They have their own goals and those goals do not align in a way that gives room for a relationship. In short, their relationship will hurt each other, not support each other.

The fact that other characters refer to them as a couple is obsolete. If anyone has ever referred to you and someone else you know as an item, you understand that other people’s feelings on your emotions do not create a relationship, your individual feelings do. So that is not ‘proof’.

Something I want to point out to the fandom:

These are like the 3 most aggresively sexualized moments that the fandom has to work with when it comes to hardcore shipping over fluff. Usually these images are followed by fics of making out passionately after these moments. Fans have turned these moments into ‘magical’ events that scream UST and drama.

But I need you to understand something so listen up.

In each of these moments... DEAN IS FREAKING TERRIFIED. 

#1 +2. Castiel warning Dean to show him respect... because he brought Dean out of Hell and could throw him back in and Dean at this point is most definitely not close to coping with the trauma of those 40 years. He’s threatening him with his biggest trigger right here.

How Romantic. Sparks are flying, guys.

#3. Castiel is literally beating up Dean in an alleyway while yelling at him that he’s being selfish and weak and ignoring Cas’ sacrifices. By the end of this, Dean believes that Cas is just going to kill him.    Awwwwww...

#4. The angels have just been exposed at villians and Dean has yelled at Cas to make a decision. Several hours later, Cas appears and slams Dean into the wall and Dean is completely lost and alarmed by this and is unaware of what side Cas has chosen until after a moment of waiting for something to happen.

All of these moments have Dean afraid and/or believing that he is probably going to die. STOP TRYING TO TURN FEAR INTO AROUSAL. That is some serious rape-culture logic and it is messed up. It’s not “kinky”, it’s not “sexy”, it’s fear. If you can’t tell the difference, go see a psychologist.

Okay. Moving past that, the fandom has a lot of issues to deal with when it comes to context and character intent. Most of the scenes ‘supporting’ Destiel are regular pictures taken at a moment with 0 context provided. Others are gifs where something else is actually going on but it looks flirty when there aren’t words so it goes. Most shippers will also confess to not being very big Destiel shippers before they got into the fanfic because it changes their perspective and makes them look for a notice things that aren’t meant to be that way. I read some Bela/Dean stories and found myself shipping them for a while when I used to be die-hard Lisa or Jo.

Also worth mentioning: The argument of Cas being a “multi-dimensional wavelength of celestial intent and therefore isn’t really gay so there’s not a problem” is a double-edged sword with the fact that Castiel has never been with anyone not female (or even human btw it was a reaper and almost Hannah and Meg), but you’re also backspacing over the idea that if it was canon it would be a gay ship so... there goes the side opting for LGBTQA representation...what is your goal with that?

I don’t ship it because I’m tired of great characters being simplified, of great relationships being ignored, of made-up images and quotes being spread as though they were true, of looking up Supernatural and being hit by a wave of Destiel headcanons, of people insulting my favorite actors for both refusing to approve of the relationship and for trying not to shut down the relationship, of the level of tin-hatting required to insist that a character is bi because of the color shirt that they wear, and for people tagging every post - no matter how unrelated - as “Destiel”, I’m sick of it all. 

Spamming is the biggest reasons for Anti-Destiel blogs. Tagging everything with your ship name makes anyone who doesn’t ship it want to scream and hate you. This is not how you gain support.

I’m personally just very sick of feeling like I’m not really a part of this fandom because I don’t ship Destiel. But a lot of fans don’t. A lot of fans aren’t on tumblr, they don’t read your fanfic, they don’t consider Cas and Dean to be a couple, they just watch and like the show. That’s kinda what being a fan is. Making everything on Supernatural about Destiel is how you lose support for the show and the fandom.

Shipping despite this is fine. You want to, go for it. It won’t change the show that I enjoy, but please remember that not everyone will ship what you ship and spamming them or harassing them is pointless and rude.

[team-adults-blog]

4.02 Heavy Lies the Crown

More reactionary that the last one. Long. Buckle Up, Kids. 

Poor Ilian. But what a great origin story amiright? Tragic. Also appreciating the simple face tattoos that seem to be done by family? His brother had the same ones. It could be clan, but Mr. Ambassador later in the episode has dumb eyebrow arc ones (Octavia should stab him for that alone. Plus he’s talkin shit the whole episode). So those are my thoughts. If you reallllllyyyy want to think about it, it might be a familial tattoo passed down through the mother’s lineage because Ilian’s mom has the same ones too- more woman leaders and power on The 100. Digging it.

aaaahhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHaaaaaaOOOOoooo. And repeat.

KABBY SEX. HOLY BAJOBIEE. I was NOT emotionally prepared for this immediately after a commercial break. It makes sense, staging wise, but Look at him there in bed with heart eyes. Here I am sitting all heart eyed. Hot damn.

“You… are a terrible influence” Ok. So this is NOT their first time folks. Waaayyyy to casual. It screams we’ve done this before and we’re going to do it again >>I’m late to go see Roan.

One side of me is yelling FINALLY. The other side is glaring at the writers for this scene. Like COME ONNNN. After 3 seasons (maybe not intended so much in S1) of hurt and comfort, character growth, and angst, you give me this???? I’m down with the slow burn but you don’t get to (here’s my not great metaphor) roll the boulder down the cliff and let me catch a glimpse of the cliff it’s going towards (aka chipped Abby jumps Kane’s bones), but still have it be a mile away. And then BAM. The boulder is now gently rolling through some green meadow at the bottom of the cliff. I DON’T THINK SO. What I wanted: to see the boulder go airborne. Emotions have built to the breaking point. [cut to commercial] Boom.The aftermath. This scene following the break. A BEFORE AND AFTER THE EXPLOSION. THE FALLING OFF THE CLIFF. I’M NOT ASKING TO SEE THE ENTIRE JOURNEY FROM THE TOP OF THE CLIFF TO THE BOTTOM (this is still the CW, after all). I’m asking for pretty typical TV sex scenes. Where was the missing lead in?

At the same time, it is nice to see them comfortable and happy with each other. It doesn’t mean I don’t feel a little cheated...

THE RINGS. This is so so so so so soooo important. There was not a single scene in S3 where Abby was not wearing her and Jake’s rings on that chain around her neck. They’ve been setting up this symbol for a while in anticipation of THIS SCENE!!!!!! Kabby definitely needed to talk about Jake at some point, and this is how a lot of the fandom saw that going down:

a) Marcus sees the rings and feels guilty, and says something to the degree of “I’d never ask you to take them off” because. Respect. Or (this is more of the guilt part) because he doesn’t think he’s as good of a man as Jake was. Abby says he’s a good guy too. He’s changed. He’s grown. A sexy beard. But actually he’s a better person too.

b) Abby feels guilty that she’s betraying Jake’s memory, or pressure to take the rings off.

c) A Combo.

And the Winner is: C

Abby with a wave of emotion as she picks up the rings. Good ‘ol perceptive Kane reading her and knowing what/why she’s feeling this way, saying, “Jake’s a part of who you are.” AND PUTTING THEM BACK ON FOR HER. THE BEST GUY RIGHT HERE. THE ABSOLUTE BEST. BRYAN CAN SUCK IT.

Beard stroke. Kiss from the season 4 promo. A+ writing. Covering all the emotional bases. This should be 50% of the show in my humble opinion.

[later]

Dad!Kane and Octavia to save the dayyyy warn Roan about the dumb ambassador from Trishanakru. Dad!Kane needs save this boy from bad-tattoo-faced ambassador. What’s one more kid? 

[End of they day] Kabby reunites. “One simple task and I’m failing you.” You’re breaking my lil’ heartttt. Diplomacy is hard lil’ marco but you’re good at it. Give it more than once conversation. You have a great deal of experience dealing with stubbornness, remember?

The difference in their faces when Abby tells Kane she can’t help Roan. Kane, mr. perceptive, in the flesh is sad, but gets it. She needs to be useful, so she has to leave Polis and him, to go back to Arkadia. “to Clarke” THIS GUY. The best. He knows. He gets it. A keeper. Okokokokok. So Abby has clearly been staring out the window mentally preparing herself for this conversation and has shut down some of her emotions in preparation. Hence open but distant body language and face. Kane is sad. Ian is very good at that expression. and all of them, honesty. complexity is important.

He looks down. One last glimpse of the boobs, no doubt. Just kiddingggg. Who knows? He notices THE RINGS are missing and swipes her hair thinking they’re covered. NOPE. THEY  NOT HIDING. THEY GONE. “Your necklace…” AH QUESTIONING. IS THIS WHAT I THINK IT IS? Yes, yes it is. Abby decided to take them off while she was alone. That to me is key. She’s taking them off for her. Because she’s ready. Not for any other reason. She can’t say it. But he understands. REALLY NICE HUG. I want a hug that nice. From anyone really. Canon: Marcus Kane is an understanding mind reader which makes him a GREAT diplomat. Pass it on.

[Octavia kills bad-tattoo-faced ambassador from Trishanakru, I know his name is Rafael, but his nickname is more fun for me] Dad!kane knows his kids. Last season it was Boris hurting his heart. Now Octavia. Also kudos to him for knowing what’s up. Kane INSTANTLY is wary and looks at Octavia when bad-tattoo-faced ambassador is missing. The ways she killed him was really smart. He should be proud she’s becoming such a good assassin. She gives herself away though- she’s got zero remorse or chill. Dad sigh. Ilian knows. Echo knows. Rumors gon fly.

I like that everyone is doing what they do best this episode:

Dr. Abby

Problem solver Raven

Ambassador Kane being diplomatic

Badass Octavia

Clarke lying (lol what a drag) and also being a leader. Eliza has one pouty face so far this season and is it bad that it makes me laugh? I’m sorry….

Jasper calling Clarke OUT! and singing

Bellamy having to make the tough call. Officially back to Bellamy from Boris. Also being big bro to some random child 10/10. 

Jaha giving speeches

When the pacing is at a nice speed, and everyone is acting in ways that make sense for their characters to act. The episode turns out really well.

Other Thoughts

Who the fuckkkk is Riley?

Um. Bryan has a cool back scar and should listen to Nate more. His morals are iffy. Where’s Miller senior? What does he think about this boy? Why does Bryan try to get Monty to kill the grounder. Monty is better than revenge and you should know that by now if you think you know Miller so well. Don’t be fucking rude. #Minty

I wish my hair looked as good as Harper’s side braid and crown. Chelsey is a babe.

Poor Lindsey is fit AF and never gets to go run around with the adventure squad because Murphy shot Raven. Yay Raven being a reluctant leader and missing Sinclair. And being savage to Jaha. His ass suddenly became an engineer so he cout be plot relevant this season, smh. He was one before being chancellor. He’s smart, sure, and I can’t see him being in the guard or anything so it fits well enough. 

I dislike Jaha. Disclaimer: I dislike Isaiah Washington as a person. However, the speech he gave Clarke was solid advice. Isaiah’s good at playing pious/arrogant/condescending characters. This season, I would like Jaha to make himself useful and not run over everyone else’s opinions. It’s also important to point out that Jaha was chipped the longest, and while he did go looking for the CoL and probably thought taking the chip was a great idea, ALL of his actions while chipped should be seen as a chipped Jaha’s actions. We don’t know his character background as well as we know others. Because we know so much about other characters who were chipped and that they’d never do the things that they did, we have no problem going back to the way we saw them before. Jaha is an exception to this because 1) we don’t really know what he would do, so we have a hard time separating his actions. I personally think Abby is the best example of the separation. As a doctor, she’s against hurting people. Chipped she ends up causing physical harm to the two people she cares the most about on Earth (I like to think of Raven and Jackson as her adopted kiddos and the next two on the list, who also happen to be the reason she takes the chip in the first place #poorabbs) AND 2) lots of people dislike the character to begin with, so it’s easy to keep blaming him, as Raven does. If Jaha were to humble himself and offer good guidance, I could see his character making a comeback.

The episode title is a misquote of Shakespeare and I find it so satisfying that Thelonious frickin Jaha, mr. pretentious, fucks that up. (He’s the one who actually says the line- to Clarke)

4.01: Lexa laid to rest. Respectfully.

4.02: Jake laid to rest. Respectfully. I hope Abby gives Clarke the necklace when she gets back to Arkadia. 

4.03: Wells? I think it’s still too fresh and early for Octavia to lay Lincoln to rest. Redemption path Jaha needs to talk about his son?

Next week: Dr. Abby goes to save luna and the boat people!