#I just need to. adapt. somehow. to what is evidently a blatant disability

[throwing-roses-into-the-abyss]

so turns out I suck at following patterns

[secretlyatargaryen]

Ugh asoiaf fandom is so frustrating. I'm so sick of people talking shit abt tyrion when their faces do literally all the same shit but they only hold tyrion accountable. Like multiple people have said that they dont shop tyrion with anyone because of his issues with women but then ship Petyr and sansa or sandor and sansa and its like,,,,, just say his dwarf dick makes you uncomfortable and leave oh my goddddddd

And like I have no issues with people shipping whatever the fuck they want, but if you cant bear to ship tyrion with anyone because his canon flaws make you uncomfortable then you should also be uncomfortable with people like petyr and sandor. It’s not a moral “this is how you should be” its literally a logical “this is how you should be” and the fact that they’re not just shows how fucking transparent they are

I’m far from an anti make no mistake it’s just the hypocrisy that pisses me off. I’m sick of the ableism and I want positive tyrion content I cry

It’s just plain ableism. I don’t care what people ship, and people have different tastes and tolerances and experiences, so some people might be able to handle, say, Sansan, despite the fact that he assaults Sansa, but not like Tyrion because the forced marriage makes them uncomfortable. That’s perfectly fine. What’s not okay is faking moral superiority or acting like your fave is objectively less problematic, or acting like it’s objectively worse for Tyrion to be in a situation with Sansa that he was forced into and which is also abusive for him vs Sandor acting of his own free will.

People also need to realize how ableism comes into play in the way fandom views Tyrion as a whole, even among Tyrion fans. I think a lot of people do this unconsciously because ableism is a learned institution that permeates our society and our thinking unless we actively question it. So when I talk about ableism I’m not saying people are sitting there going “grrr I hate people with dwarfism” (although there is a lot of blatant ableism in this fandom wrt Tyrion because people with dwarfism are largely seen as an acceptable target even among people who consider themselves sensitive to social justice issues), what I mean is that ableism is often present in our thinking even if we don’t realize it, so people do have to question WHY they see Tyrion’s sexuality as so much more threatening and uncomfortable. Shit like that post in, ironically, a livejournal group called “Sane ASOIAF Fans” where the poster was like “It’s a good thing Sandor’s cock didn’t betray him on the night of the battle of the blackwater!” to make some kind of disgusting comparison between a scene of a grown man assaulting a child and a child being raped by his father, in order to make the former seem better and to demonize the latter, is not okay, and a symptom of the ableist idea that even when Tyrion is being abused, he is a figure of disgust or somehow to blame. People are enthusiastic to ascribe malicious or immoral intent to Tyrion even in places where they would forgive others, and that IS a symptom of how we as a society collectively think about people with disabilities, disabled men and in particular men with dwarfism, who throughout history have been used as a symbol for disgust and a threat to idealized feminine purity. That’s why people are more inclined to, say, forgive Sandor on the grounds that he was drunk, but ascribe malicious intent to Tyrion despite the heavy coercion that he is under. It’s also why people are more willing to forgive Jaime for having abusive sex with Cersei, because he fits a masculine ideal and has sex within the confines of a relationship, and it’s easy for us to say that Cersei “wanted it anyway,” vs Tyrion who is both disabled and has taboo sex with women he pays for. There’s a lot of assumptions about how OBVIOUSLY no woman could actually want to have sex with him, therefore it’s somehow worse for him to have sex or think about having sex. This also comes out when people sneer at Tyrion for thinking that he wants Sansa or Shae or anyone to love him. There’s a perception in fandom that NO ONE could love Tyrion so anytime he thinks about wanting love it’s somehow wrong and a sign that he really wants to commit rape or that he’s imposing on women (specifically able bodied, idealized women) by even thinking about them. 

That’s why fanfic writers who want to imagine Tyrion being in a mutual relationship are sneered at, because there’s no way that could REALLY happen, right? Like, I can’t count the many times I’ve heard about how it’s somehow awful to imagine Sansa being in a mutual relationship with Tyrion because it’s “disregarding Sansa’s desires.” What bullshit. Sansa is a fictional character, and her story is far from over. If I write a story in which Sansa desires Tyrion, then it’s not Sansa’s desires that are being disregarded. It is the ableist reader’s perception of Tyrion that isn’t being catered to. Same with the insistence that Tyrion has to be portrayed as a sexual deviant or predator, and this goes for the show adaptation as well as fic. There is NO reason that Tyrion has to be portrayed the same way in the show, or in fanfiction, that he is in the books. No reason. Tyrion is a fictional character, and not a real person. So no adaptation is actually “whitewashing” him because there is no real Tyrion to whitewash. So when people are like, “but Tyrion did x thing!” Okay, great, but in my story he doesn’t. There’s no reason that should be a problem unless you’re really invested in seeing this character being portrayed a certain way, and being invested in seeing fictional disabled people be portrayed as villainous or immoral is not a good look.

Also, within fandom, even Tyrion’s moral behavior does not explain the lack of fic or fandom content. I have been told lots of times that it’s okay for me to write “dark fic” about Tyrion (which is bullshit anyway), but if that were the case, why are there not hundreds of dark fic about Tyrion? Why doesn’t he have a thriving fandom the way Thramsay does, if that’s the real reason people are uncomfortable?

I’ll tell you the reason why, it’s because Tyrion is a dwarf. That’s the reason people are more comfortable with like, all manner of sadistic torture porn but the idea of a person with dwarfism being portrayed as a sexual being, as a romantic being and an object of desire, makes people uncomfortable. That’s the reason Tyrion’s sexuality is exaggerated in fandom (which is so meta because this EXACT THING happens to Tyrion in the books and is used against him in his trial, to make him seem sexually deviant, when his sex life with Shae is, in reality, pretty vanilla.)

It’s also an interesting phenomenon to observe because the way Martin writes the story, Tyrion’s sexuality is on display for the reader. Sandor’s and even Petyr Baelish’s aren’t. Even though we hear about it, we don’t get the details and narrative closeness that we do with Tyrion. That’s why there’s a persistent fandom belief that Sandor doesn’t actually sleep with prostitutes or that his sleeping with prostitutes is somehow innocent, or why there are certain fans who make excuses for even Petyr. We’re told it happens in the books but we don’t see it, so it’s easy to idealize or imagine away. Meanwhile GRRM revels in the details with Tyrion and like, on one hand that’s part of what makes the character revolutionary, because the book deals openly with the sex life of a character who, because of his disability, would usually be portrayed as sexless in fiction, and does not apologize for it. But the flip side of that is that people with dwarfism have also, historically, been treated as an object of fetishism and sexual horror, and for all GRRM imbues Tyrion with humanity, there is something of a voyeuristic quality in the way he writes Tyrion. The reader is kind of like Oberyn going “oooh, tell me more!” and it also must be remembered that GRRM does not have dwarfism and is able bodied, so the way he writes Tyrion, especially with regard to sex, is not exempt from these stereotypes about people with dwarfism.

So like, when people cite x, y, and z thing as a reason Tyrion shouldn’t be shipped with *anyone*, maybe we should question why the story was written in such a way that the only POV character with dwarfism and a congenital disability in general can comfortably be excluded from shipping. Maybe we should question why we allow exceptions for other characters but automatically assume the worst about Tyrion, even when we aren’t in his head. 

And if it’s about Tyrion’s relationships with women, why aren’t there tons of m/m ships with Tyrion? I can probably think of like, ten possibilities off the top of my head which make more sense and have more canon evidence than most widely accepted asoiaf ships. Why is Tyrion excluded from even AU scenarios, if it’s really about what Tyrion does in canon? Why is there so much policing in fandom of even fix-it fics or noncanon fics that want to imagine Tyrion a different way? Fandom is about creativity, and insisting that this character with dwarfism HAS to be portrayed a certain way and nobody else can imagine him any different is extremely uncreative, and as I said before, it is NOT a coincidence that fandom suddenly gets uncreative when it comes to a character whose disability marks him as other.

[glenngaylord]

CRY HARD - My Review of WONDER (3 1/2 Stars)

THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER was my favorite movie of 2012, so I could not have been more excited to see what Stephen Chbosky did next.  He’s one of the rare writer/directors who adapted his own novel and did so brilliantly. Although WONDER’s source material is a novel by R.J. Palacio, and Chbosky co-wrote the screenplay with Steve Conrad and Jack Thorne, this follow-up does not disappoint as long as its taken on its own commercial, family friendly, tearjerker terms.  Besides, I blubbered uncontrollably several times, so that kind of emotional reaction deserves special consideration.  

In an apparent homage to the opening credits to THE WORLD ACCORDING TO GARP, the film opens on an image of a person in a spacesuit floating weightlessly in and out of the frame against a starry background.  An abrupt cut shows us Auggie (the incredible Jacob Tremblay of ROOM, and no less so here) bouncing on his bed.  He’s a home-schooled child born with facial differences who is about to take one giant leap forward by attending a tony private school. His parents, Isabel and Nate (Julia Roberts and Owen Wilson respectively), fear his ridicule and isolation, but realize it’s a necessary step in his development.  

Soon Auggie meets the principal, Mr. Tushman (Mandy Patinkin), who gets a clever introduction, as well as several students assigned to show him the ropes. They include Charlotte (Elle McKinnon), a hilariously self-absorbed young girl who can’t help but rattle off her IMDB page to Auggie as well as Julian (Bryce Gheisar), the snobby bully-in-waiting, and most importantly to Jack Will (Noah Jupe), an empathetic but flawed kid who will form a very important friendship with Auggie.  

Chbosky proved with PERKS that he has a strong visual sense and a real knack for evoking empathy from his characters.  It becomes evident right away that PERKS was no fluke.  Despite the obvious “mush factor” of this film, it’s impossible not to care deeply for every single character.  I just loved them all.

The structure of the film helps immeasurably, as it’s told in chapters from differing points of view.  Many would have told the film from Auggie’s perspective and left it at that, but like the novel, WONDER shifts time and narrators to lovingly build a community of people all in need of a little TLC.  The film hits on the hard truth that a child with a disability can suck up all the oxygen in a room, something rendered with such beauty by Izabela Vidovic’s performance as Auggie’s older sister Via.  While she loves her brother, she feels like the forgotten child, suffering in silence as her needs go unnoticed.  The first shift to Via’s POV adds such an effective layer to the storytelling and prevented the film from succumbing to the deification of Auggie.  He’s no saint, despite being smart and utterly loveable.  

The story takes place over one school year, with Auggie trying to survive bullying and the devastating effects of feeling isolated, ridiculed and sometimes invisible.  His friendships ebb and flow with several gut punches hitting particularly hard.  Regardless, each character is afforded their own humanity, whether it’s Julian or Miranda (Danielle Rose Russell) as Via’s former best pal who has walked away from their friendship.  By showing everyone’s flaws and potential for redemption, the film feels like required viewing for all children (and most adults) to teach them how not to be utter assholes.  It’s because of this, that the film is one of the more important ones of the year.  

Yes, it’s commercial and manipulative, but as such, it achieves grace and beauty.  I tend to cry in films whenever one person extends generosity to another, and in the film’s strikingly original “make up” scene, I ugly cried. Chbosky may not be a cinematic genius, but he sure can make you feel something.  

Julia Roberts, all coiled intensity here, commits herself fully to a fairly small role, but her reaction when she picks up Auggie from school one day felt so real and fresh.  Wilson, as the cool dad always trying to keep the peace, brings such warmth and left-field humor to his part, and Noah Jupe’s Jack manages to make kindness and heartbreak something interesting to watch.  David Diggs (HAMILTON Tony Winner) carries the film’s blatant messages as Auggie’s school teacher, but somehow manages to make his character a warm joy.  

I’m not a huge fan of cinematographer Don Burgess (FORREST GUMP), and wish Chbosky had continued to work with Andrew Dunn, who shot PERKS, but Burgess keeps things warm and lovely throughout.  There’s nothing amazing here, but he gets out of the way enough to let the actors and the expert storytelling do all the heavy lifting.  

It’s no easy feat for an 11-year-old to carry a film on his little shoulders, but Tremblay is not your typical child performer.  With a range and sense of nuance far beyond his years, he anchors the film from beginning to end.  The ending, however, is where things go a little astray with a scene (without spoiling anything) that feels like the equivalent of electing the gay kid as Prom King because he’s gay and for no other reason.  Still, any film that shows children a kinder path is ok in my book.