#I immediately knew this epilogue was going to be amazing after those five minutes

[saturn-is-lazy]

Penny is gay for the protag’s mom and Arven is having mommy issues in the first five minutes of the SV epilogue

[tomtenadia]

In your arms

Rowaelin moth - Day 15 - Bad day

This is set in the Island Dreams AU.

This fic is basically three years after the wedding scene and somewhere before the epilogue which is 5 years later.

Aelin had a bad day at the hospital and Rowan looks after her.

Aelin loved her job. A lot. When she got offered the job of senior emergency surgeon she had been ecstatic, especially after the London drama. She had many years of experience in a big trauma centre in London and a hospital on the islands would never be any close to the madness of the capital. There were days though, when a smaller sized hospital showed just how difficult it could get.

That was one of those days. She and Malcolm had been running around the A&E non stop directing the show and supervising the treatments. They had victims of a car crash happened just outside Stornoway, two different patients airlifted from two different locations with sever injuries, and on top of that the usual influx of people. Her day had got even worse when a 3 years old girl was brought in after an extreme allergic reaction to something she ate. According to the mother’s tale she had started having trouble breathing very quickly after the ingestion of the food. By the time the girl was brought in she had already been without oxygen for too long. Her heart had stopped beating soon after. Aelin had stood near the mother and tried to comfort the woman who had gone in shock herself at the sudden loss of her daughter.

Once free again she had rushed to the toilet and emptied the contents of her stomach. Then sat on the bathroom floor and cried. It did not help that she was pregnant and hormonal. The girl’s death had hit her badly.

Her two girls, Freyja and Morrigan were the same age as the girl she had lost. The idea of losing them was so painful that would just send her into a full panic attack.

And now she and Rowan had decided to give it a go and add another member to their family. After months of trying they were finally successful and they now had a boy on his way.

Slowly she made her way back into her office and plopped heavily in her chair, her head in her hands while tears still run down her cheeks.

She picked up her mobile and phoned the one person who could help her.

Rowan picked up immediately.

“Missing your husband this much?” His voice cheery, but her chest tightened and more sobs broke through.

“Aelin, are you okay?” He asked her when he heard her sobbing over the phone.

“I just…” her voice broken “I just lost a three year old girl.”

Rowan was silent for a moment probably looking at the twins who she knew were at the bookshop with him.

“How?”

Aelin sobbed once more “anaphylactic shock.”

“What can I do?”

“Nothing. I just needed to hear your voice.”

A moment later she heard a girl’s voice and realised that Freyja had rushed to Rowan and now wanted to talk to her mum.

Aelin spoke to her daughter for a bit until she stated that she had to go back slaying the dragon.

“How have they been?”

Rowan chuckled “Morrigan has been playing quietly on the mat and coloured a couple of pages of her book.” He sighed “Freyja in the meantime has slain three dragons, saved a prince in distress, went on a quest to find the perfect marker and now is helping me tidy the books in the history section. If she sits down for five minutes I call it a success.” 

A small chuckle left Aelin. Their daughters were identical physically, but they were complete opposite when it came to behaviour. Morrigan was like Rowan, calm and quiet. Freyja was a hurricane. Constantly moving and full of energy.

“You could have left them with my mum.”

“Ach, mo chridhe, you know I love having them in the shop. I had a busy day and Freyja just loves to charm the customer with her babbling.”

After a moment of silence Rowan spoke again “how are you two?”

Aelin’s hand went to her stomach “baby and I are fine. The nausea today is not too bad.”

“You need to take it easy.”

Aelin huffed “I worked when I was pregnant with the twins, surely I can manage with just one tenant.”

“I know, but remember what Yrene said.”

“Tha.” She replied. She had been taking Gaelic lessons for a while now, especially because they had decided to raise their daughters to be bilingual, so Aelin had been putting effort in it. But her progress had been slower than she expected and she was still very shy in showing off her language skills.

In that moment her pager went off and she groaned. It was definitely one of those days “Ro, I need to go. Give a kiss to the girls.”

“Will do.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too, fireheart.”

She hung up and ran outside, ready for more drama and a shift that didn’t seem to end. Malcolm met her halfway “Accident in a farm. Crush injuries and chemical burns.”

“This day just gets better and better,” she grabbed the protective gown he passed and while walking to the the A&E she donned the gear.

***

It was later than expected when she did manage to leave the hospital. It really had been the day from hell and all she wanted to do was curl on the sofa in Rowan’s arms while watching the twins play.

She stepped in the house and was quite taken aback by the silence. Their house was never quiet.

“Rowan?” She called, while dumping her messenger bag at the entrance and shedding shoes and jacket “Ro?”

He appeared a moment later with a towel around his waist and Aelin blamed the hormones because in that moment all she wanted to do was to jump him, but with the girls around that was a treat that would have to wait.

“Taking showers without me?” Seeing him in front of her, washed away the tension and the stress of a horrible day.

Rowan opened his arms for her and Aelin crashed in his embrace, his lips kissing the crown of her head.

“Where are the girls?”

“With your mum.” He explained “I thought that after the bad day you had, you could do with some peace and quiet and some care from your husband.” He took her hand and walked upstairs to their bathroom. He opened the door and Aelin gasped. The lights were off but there were candles all around the tub, which in turn was filled with bubbles and foam and Aelin could smell her favourite bath salts.

“I just thought you and I could relax…”

Aelin threw her arms around his neck and kissed him “you really are the man of my dreams.”

He kissed her back and then his hands started to rover along her body “but first… we need to get you out of these clothes…” he whispered and turned her so that her back was against his chest. Slowly he removed her shirt and then the trousers, his hand caressing her bump that had started to show. He then unclasped her bra and soon after her knickers were gone too. Aelin turned in his arms and begged for a kiss he did not deny her.

“You are stunning.” He said softly while his lips teased her neck.

Aelin in response snorted “I will be a stranded whale again, some of the weight I gained from the twins never left me and I have horrible stretch marks. Seriously, you need glasses.”

Rowan’s kiss deepened and her legs went weak. After three years of marriage he still had that power over her.

“You are gorgeous. And those marks are proof of the amazing job you did to bring our girls into the world. They don’t bother me.” 

She seemed to believe him and hugged against his chest “sorry,” a small sob broke from her lips “It was such a horrible shift today.”

“Shhh…” Rowan took her hand “nothing a bath with your husband won’t solve.”

Rowan slowly climbed in the big tub and then took her hand for her to follow him.

She sat against his chest, water lapping against her skin. She dunked her head under the water and then leaned it against his shoulder. Rowan grabbed some shampoo and slowly started massaging her scalp.

“This is perfect,” she moaned and Rowan kissed her neck, while his hand trailed down her arms in gentle caresses “just relax in my arms, I am here for you. Let me take care of you.”

Aelin closed her eyes and let the feel of him wash away the dreadful day she had. The pain, the anguish and the fears.

“Thank you for always being at my side. For being my rock.”

Rowan gently kissed her head “when I married you I promised I would be at your side in difficult times…” his hands covered her bump “You are my everything and making sure that you are fine after a dreadful shift goes under my job of husband.”

Her head turned slightly and kissed the length of his neck.

“At our wedding I also promised chocolate cake and, after we finish our bath, I have it ready for you.”

“Good,” she whispered while turning and straddling him. When they fixed up the house they got a bathtub large enough that would allow them to have some fun in it.

“Aelin…” his warning tone. She knew he was not keen on them having sex while she was pregnant, no matter how many times Yrene had told them it was okay.

“I thought you said you’d do anything to make me happy…” her hands slipped under the water and gripped him “your wife is asking you to help her forget.”

At those words he caved because knowing she was okay and happy was all he cared about.

And slowly, in her husband’s arms Aelin forgot about death and pain and only felt his love… healing.

In his arms, love pushed away all the pain.

[maatryoshkaa]

young god | epilogue

chapters: | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11| 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | epilogue

word count: 4.4k

description: it’s been five years since the Miroh Heights murder cases came to a close — and five long, bittersweet years since you’d caught a glimpse of Han Jisung. Things in Miroh Heights have changed drastically since then — but when Felix sets you up on another blind date in an attempt to help you move on from the past, you realise that, once again, you’ve signed up for much more than you bargained for.

masterlist

recommended listening: stray kids - “sunshine”

epilogue.

“See ya, Miss l/n!”

You turned to wave back at the little girl who had called your name, her round eyes visibly bright from the waiting room of your clinic. Seven years old, front teeth just beginning to come in. One of her hands clutched a half-unwrapped lollipop as her mother held onto the other. 

The first time you had seen them, the child had been unwilling to speak — bullied relentlessly at school, her mother had informed you through a veil of desperate tears — but now, her laughter filled the warm air, traumas that had once been etched into a too-young face already beginning to heal and fade.

Evening sunshine warmed your cheeks the moment you stepped out of the building’s doors, a light breeze rustling the papers in your hand as you quickly tucked them into your bag. “Five years of graduate school hasn’t made you more organised,” Felix often teased you, and you would smack his shoulder in retaliation.

Five years hadn’t changed your friendship in the slightest, either—and you had to admit you were beyond grateful for that.

As always, the city around you was humming with life: evening rush hour, with people darting here and there, frantically flagging down taxis and catching their buses. Usually, on days like these, you should have been hopping into the first cab home and collapsing like a corpse as soon as you reached your apartment. But today, you remembered with a sigh, was not going to be one of those days. 

“Hey, Doctor l/n!”

You whipped your head towards the voice, a smile spreading across your tired features as you saw who it belonged to. In a slightly jaded Mini Cooper—second hand, of course, but worked just like new — Yang Jeongin waved at you from the driver’s seat.  

“I’m not a doctor, ‘innie,” you reminded him playfully as he unlocked the passenger door and let you climb in.

“Not a doctor yet,” he corrected you, grinning. “Besides, ‘child therapist’ doesn’t have as much of a ring to it.”

You rolled your eyes, laughing, and waved at another one of your patients as Jeongin started the engine. “You really didn’t have to offer to drive me, you know — the streets are a nightmare during this hour.”

“It’s not that far,” Jeongin protested, “Plus, I barely get to see you now, you’re so busy.” You didn’t have the heart to argue. The kid loved being behind the wheel so much, he made it seem like you were doing him a favour.

You watched Jeongin turn onto the main road, squeezing the car in between a van and a motorcyclist. He really had grown up over the last few years — his hair was darker now, remarkably sharp cheekbones overtaking his once-rounded cherub cheeks — but in some ways, nothing had changed at all. He still had that natural knack of brightening whatever room he stepped in — the Yang Jeongin effect, Hyunjin called it. And his heart was still too big for his own good: you remembered how he had adamantly refused to take the money Jisung kept offering him after the case had finally closed, and when Hyunjin had asked him why, Jeongin had simply replied, “After everything that’s happened, it doesn’t feel like he’s the one who owes me.”

On the other hand, Jeongin had been more than happy to take Prosecutor Kang’s compensation money instead, and had finally visited a car dealership with you and Hyunjin. 

The moment he had seen the Mini-Cooper — a beat-up thing from the 90s that you were amazed was still running — the younger boy’s eyes had lit up. “It’s just...it looks like the one our family used to have, before...the incident,” he had explained sheepishly, making you and Hyunjin exchange a look. And so, after a fiery back-and-forth between you and the salesman—not to mention a few sleepless nights at the mechanic’s — the rest was history.

The light turned green, and you spotted a photograph wobbling on the dashboard — a laughing child you recognised immediately as Jeongin. Behind him, a woman with a familiar wide smile had her arms around a man with eyes resembling a fox’s, with none of the slyness. “How’s your dad these days?”

“Mostly stays at home taking care of my mum, but he swears he wouldn’t have it any other way.” Jeongin turned his head to you excitedly, as if a thought just hit him. “She got out of bed a couple days ago, you know? The first time ever since my dad left.”

Your mouth fell open in a surprised smile, and Jeongin continued, “He’s real excited he got to teach me how to drive, too. I think he feels like he missed out on a lot of things, like...walking me home from school. Teaching me how to ride a bike. Graduation.” He shrugged. His words might have sounded sad at first, but you could see the way the lines of Jeongin’s face were more relaxed now, at peace. 

“Mind if I make a quick stop?” Jeongin asked abruptly, and you checked your watch before shaking your head lightly.

“I’m still about twenty minutes early. We’ve got plenty of time.”

He turned onto a familiar street, and you rolled down the window as Glow Cafe slowly came into view. It was just as busy as it had ever been — even the cars were stalling by the curb — but Hwang Hyunjin spotted you almost immediately, waving through the glass window. Quickly hopping out, Jeongin popped the trunk open, and you watched him haul two crates of coffee beans into the bustling cafe. The once-famed “delivery boy” of Miroh Heights only really did deliveries for Glow Cafe now, after Hyunjin had offered Jeongin a position as a barista until he graduated—and although he wasn’t the best with his hands (or his memory, for that matter), Hyunjin didn’t mind in the slightest.

“Him being here is more than enough for business. You should see the students flock in here every morning just to catch a glimpse of him.” The former barista snorted. “What’d I tell you? They’re eating him right up.”

They waved at Jeongin now as he jogged obliviously out of the cafe, Hyunjin’s laughs muted by the glass as he threw you a knowing wink. He had graduated himself, two years ago, officially inheriting the business after his grandmother had passed away. Glow Cafe had since come a long way, with Hyunjin always at the forefront of new design ideas and enthusiastically telling you about his plans to expand even more in the future.           

“Get this: ‘CEO Hwang, the most eligible bachelor of Miroh Heights,’” Felix held up his hands as if picturing a giant headline, giving his signature wolf whistle as you burst into laughter and Hyunjin kicked the blond man in the shin. “Ow!”

“How did you even get into the press with those cheesy titles?” Hyunjin  groaned.

“Not just ‘get into the press’, ‘jinnie,” you reminded him, giggling, “he’s the head journalist now!”

It was true—with his impeccable wit and seamless way with words, it came to nobody’s surprise when Felix maneuvered his way to the top of the local press in a matter of years. The head of the press still loathed him with a biting passion— “I can feel her glares all the way from her office,” Felix retorted — and rumour had it that the two seemed to fire shots at each other all day long. The image of a powder-faced, middle-aged woman bickering with your notoriously insufferable best friend made you laugh, but you also knew deep down that Felix always took his job more seriously than he let on. His eloquent articles had gotten his name out across the city in no time,  and so you took comfort in knowing that — no matter how hard the head of the press bared her teeth—nobody could touch Lee Felix now. 

Five years, you thought to yourself wistfully, eyes catching a familiar detective’s office as Jeongin drove past. What a trip down memory lane. You’d seldom come by this part of town since then, and seeing the familiar buildings sent a flood of memories and mixed feelings stirring in your chest. 

The well-loved Detective Bang, much to the disappointment of adoring students and professors alike, had moved abroad to a bigger city—whether he had been taken by a new precinct, or a new big case, you couldn’t be sure. “Rumour has it he’s doing undercover work now,” Seungmin had mentioned to you once in passing, “We haven’t heard from him in a while, but he’s making a big name for himself out there, that’s for sure.”

The District Nine police station whizzed by you in a blur, and more of the prosecutor’s words rang through your head.

“Meanwhile, the chief of police keeps insisting he’s glad to be rid of him, but we all know he secretly misses Chan.” Seungmin had shaken his head, and you had smiled at the image of the stoic police captain—chief, now—grudgingly sulking over the loss of his best friend.   

Jeongin made one last turn, and the narrow buildings opened up into the heart of Miroh Heights—the oldest part of town, where the roller rink, record shop, and the diner were. The sight of Mia’s Diner made you sink down instinctively in the passenger seat, and you couldn’t keep the raw dread out of your voice as you let out a long sigh. 

Jeongin gave you sympathetic look. “For someone who’s going on a blind date, you don’t sound too happy.”

“That’s because I’m not, Jeongin. I don’t even know why Felix keeps insisting on these. The last time I agreed to one was—” you broke off before you could finish what you were saying, the unspoken words echoing in your mind. The last time I agreed to one was when I met Jisung.

That’s right—the last official blind date you had been on, you had met Han Jisung — and he had turned your entire world upside down. For years afterwards, you had told yourself that you wouldn’t take that day back for the entire world, but now...now, you weren’t so sure.

After all, how could you be sure of someone you hadn’t heard from in over five years?

The rehabilitation centre didn’t allow letters in or out— you had learned that the hard way after your first letters had been sent directly back to your doorstep. Usually, they had told you, if things went well, patients could start correspondence again after a year or so—but you had gotten absolutely nothing. Not a single word. 

Five years—he should have been out by now. He could have been anywhere, doing anything—but he certainly hadn’t remembered to write or even call you. 

Had he really forgotten about you?

“Five years is a long time, y/n,” Felix told you gently, after you had adamantly refused the blind date he kept insisting on. “People...change, and maybe he’s—moved on.”

Moved on. 

You didn’t know how to tell Felix how much the thought of that hurt more than you were willing to admit, how this was the sole reason why you hadn’t been able to go on a single date for the past five years. You didn’t know how to tell him that Jisung hadn’t left your mind since the moment he had disappeared from your sight, five years ago, in the corridor of that courthouse. 

“I’ll be waiting,” Jisung had said.  And yet he was nowhere to be found. Meanwhile, Felix wasn’t taking no for an answer.

“You’re in your mid-twenties now, y/n. Loosen up a little, yeah? You’re allowed to go on dates, for goodness’ sake.”

“I’m hopeless, ‘lix. I’m pretty sure the stray dog on the street has a more interesting love life than me.”

“Maybe,” Felix mused, “I think I saw it running around with a litter of puppies the other da—ow!”

“You okay? You look kind of sick,” Jeongin remarked, pulling you out of your thoughts. “Got everything you need?”

You resisted the urge to laugh. If only Jeongin knew how you had prepared for this date—by mapping out all the ways you were going to end it as quickly as possible. Faking food poisoning? Check. Arrange a time for a friend to call you and pretend an emergency came up? Check— although Hyunjin had had a strange glint in his eyes when he had agreed to it. Worst comes to worst? Pepper spray, check. You let out a slow exhale. “Sure. All set.”

You thanked Jeongin with a hug and hopped out of the car. Just as you began walking towards the diner, you heard him call out behind you.

“Oh, yeah, Felix told me pass on a message — from him to you.” You turned back, and Jeongin gave a boyish grin that was half apologetic, half laughing. “‘Go get ‘em, tiger!’”

You gave an exasperated cry and yanked open the diner door.

━━━━━━━━

You were beginning to wonder if you’d been stood up.

Mia’s Diner was usually busy, bustling with students and townspeople alike, and tonight it truly was: booths packed with couples both old and new, laughter and the smell of food wafting through the warm air as friends and families celebrated the start of summer. The jukebox was on and playing an old disco song you liked but didn’t know the name of, the checkered floor tiles clicking with the sounds of brisk waitresses’ heels and dancing feet.

You didn’t know why Felix had insisted on coming here, of all places, what with the mixed emotions and memories you had tied to it, but you had to admit that the jovial atmosphere of Mia’s Diner on a Friday night never really disappointed. You found yourself relaxing slightly—just slightly, bobbing your head lightly to the music.

“Mia’s Diner?” You repeated incredulously. “Seriously, Felix, do you only know one date location? For the so-called ‘Matchmaker of Miroh Heights’, you’re sure lacking in the variety department.”

“Easy, tiger. Just trust me on this one, okay? You’re gonna owe me one.”

“I’m not—” you began indignantly, but Felix continued.

“Plus, the poor guy in question hasn’t been on a date in years, either. You both need this.”

“Years? Are you setting me up with a hermit?” 

“Oh, yeah. A big-time loser, seriously— but don’t tell him I said that. Just — indulge him a bit, okay, y/n? I promise you won’t regret it.”

And so, for the second time, Felix’s schemes and pleading puppy eyes had gotten you here—sitting at an empty booth, waiting for a blind date. He hadn’t even bothered to show you a picture of the man in question. You couldn’t help the smile from slowly slipping from your face as each minute passed, and you nibbled your lip anxiously.

Your date was thirty minutes late.

You peered out the window, at the lights of the town glowing a faint neon  against the clear evening skies. Each time a car filled in a parking space, you sat up, craning your neck to see if it was him—before slumping back down in disappointment. Five years, you thought to yourself glumly. Five years, and you still had no luck with dates. Maybe you just had no luck with love, you thought dryly. You imagined Felix laughing later when you told him about it and sighed, a twinge of worry replacing the dread in your gut.

Had something gone wrong?

After turning the waitress away for the eighth time, you fished out your phone from your pocket, tapping on the foreign number Felix had given you. Zero new messages, zero missed calls. At least I can tell Felix I tried, you thought glumly. Maybe I should just call Jeongin again, and ask him to pick me up. And then you could drop by Glow Cafe for a bit, before trudging back to your apartment like a fallen soldier.

Just as you were punching in Jeongin’s name, feeling a sense of guilty relief wash over you, you vaguely registered the diner door swinging open beneath the lively music, and a pair of footsteps trying to shuffle past the dancing couples.

For a split second, you thought you saw a pair of tattered black Converse—laces untied, soles worn—but the mirage disappeared, and was replaced by a pair of dress shoes that eventually came to a stop at your booth. You sighed, fighting back the tears that had suddenly threatened to well in your eyes. Shit. This is not the time to be thinking about him. Why were you still thinking about him? And why on earth had you agreed to this? 

You lifted your gaze, trying to muster up a smile, hoping your disappointment didn’t show on your face— 

And immediately froze.

“Hello.”

Standing before you, looking almost like an apparition — a golden silhouette against the backdrop of the dim diner — was Han Jisung.

You had to blink several times to realise you weren’t hallucinating again. He looked...different, and yet in some ways, he looked entirely the same: his hair was shorter, but tousled as it had always been, cheeks flushed and breathless as if—as if he’d been running through a storm.

You felt your body moving before any intelligible thoughts could form in your head, pulling you forwards like a magnet until you were standing face-to-face, your shaky eyes darting across his features, not daring to believe what you were seeing.

All of a sudden, the glint in Hyunjin and Jeongin’s eyes made sense, Felix’s words replaying in your head as overwhelmed tears began welling in your eyes without warning.

“The poor guy in question hasn’t been on a date in years, either.”

“A big-time loser, seriously — but don’t tell him I said that. Just — indulge him a bit, okay, y/n? I promise you won’t regret it.”  

“Y-you—are such a dork,” you stammered out, one hand weakly hitting Jisung’s chest as you felt the tears finally spill down your face. “Han Jisung, you are such a d—” 

Your words were cut off when Jisung pulled you into his arms, his head falling to rest in the crook of your neck. Your shoulders shook with muffled sobs as you buried your face in his chest, memorising everything about this feeling, not wanting to take a single second for granted, memorising everything about him. Jisung no longer carried with him that scent of gasoline and fire — instead, he smelled faintly of lemongrass, and a hint of warm, fresh laundry.

“I missed you,” you finally whispered hoarsely, “I just—missed you, so much.”

He chuckled in your ear, the low, familiar hum stirring faint, faraway memories in your head, and you gripped onto his shirt harder, as if he would disappear completely if you didn’t hold on tight enough.

Jisung had found you in the crowded diner before you had seen him — just like the first time he had met you. And just like the first time, he had felt his breath hitch in his throat, hands hesitating on the door, wondering if he should turn back instead. He had watched you bob your head gently to the music, a small, tentative smile on your face.

You looked good — no, amazing. Different, and yet entirely the same. Kind, worried eyes catching him completely off guard, like the flash of a camera.

Just as bright.

Just as brilliant.

The truth was, there hadn’t been a single day where he hadn’t thought of you — of your voice, your touch, your laugh. Jisung had asked Felix for help the moment he had gotten released, but what he hadn’t forseen was your reaction.

“She won’t go on a blind date, mate,” Felix had informed him exasperatedly, “Took weeks of convincing. Good news, though — she finally caved. You sneaky, hopeless romantic bastard.”

She might have forgotten me, Jisung had thought. And even if you hadn’t, you might not even welcome the sight of him—after all, he hadn’t been in touch since he had left, all those years ago. But in the end, the inexplicable pull in his chest had grown unbearable, and he found himself walking towards you, wading through the crowd, feeling the ache in his heart softening with each step he took. All the way back to you.

You pulled away slowly, vision blurry as Jisung lifted a hand to cup your face, never taking eyes off yours. He had grown in the time you had been apart—he was taller, his once-lean frame stronger—and, most of all, there was a light in his eyes that hadn’t been there before.

“Hey, pretty girl,” he murmured softly, and you laughed in disbelief, “I think you’re my blind date.” 

“How—w-why—”

“I told you I wanted to do this all over again, didn’t I? And I promised that I would try to do it right this time.” Jisung smiled apologetically, wiping your tear stained cheeks with his thumb. “I’m sorry it took so long.”

You shook your head, eyes widening when you saw what he had been carefully clutching in his other hand: a small bouquet of sunflowers, their golden yellow petals as tousled as Jisung’s own blond locks. 

“Apparently they symbolise new beginnings,” Jisung said, pulling a stray petal from your hair and chuckling, “Keeping promises. Eternal happiness. That kind of thing.”

“Why didn’t you write?” You whispered, as Jisung tucked the bouquet into your hands. 

“I wanted to...to heal. In every sense of the word. I didn’t want to show you, until I...knew I was really better. Believe me, I wanted to.” Jisung’s voice dropped to a whisper, as if he were fighting back tears. “I wanted to, so, so badly.”

You shook your head, mumbling something about how much of a stubborn idiot he was, and Jisung’s laugh made a hesitant smile tug at your lips. As if sensing the lightening atmosphere, the waitress had promptly appeared behind Jisung and meekly cleared her throat, setting down the menu. Jisung turned back to look at you, his grin growing playful.

“I hope you’re hungry?”

The diner seemed to come back to you all at once in a flood of senses, the music and murmur of restaurant goers sending a pleasant hum through your veins as you and Jisung sat down. The night went by in a warm blur, Jisung telling you about his life at the institute, the unlikely friends he had made, the dreams he hadn’t realised he had. 

“I’m going to go back to school,” he admitted, one hand rubbing the back of his neck shyly. “I’ll be a bit behind, but...I want to study something I actually like this time.”

You had told him about how you had been working in a child therapy ward ever since you had graduated, about all the children you had met and loved and cared for. As you talked about them, you saw a wistful look in Jisung’s eyes, and a thought crossed your mind. “Have you heard anything from—from Minho?” 

He gave a small smile, but shook his head. “Rarely. It hasn’t been long since he was released, but he said he was planning on going abroad. Doing some travelling. I think...he’ll reach out when he’s ready.” He then added, as an afterthought, “And if he doesn’t, I wouldn’t blame him.”

The sad simplicity of Jisung’s words stirred a strange feeling you couldn’t quite place in your chest, and your mind flashed back to the cold-eyed coroner and his stiff smiles; then, to the raw pain that had cracked through his strained features the last time you had caught a glimpse of him. Maybe you would meet again one day, or maybe that truly would be the last you ever heard of him.

Healing of the mind, you knew, was a strange process—one that always took much longer than you would expect. There were always scars that reopened along the way, old hidden wounds that surfaced right when you least expected them. There would always be answers you might never find, you mused sadly, closure you might never get.

But sometimes, you thought as you listened to Jisung talk, memorizing the feeling of his fingers interlaced with yours, sometimes we can only hope to hold onto what we already have. 

The end of the night drew closer, and when Jisung and you had stepped outside the diner, the city was swimming in the dark ochre of the setting sun. Eventually, the two of you ended up back in the wide garden behind the hospital, your laughs and giddy conversation slowly hushing into softer murmurs. In the distance, the rush of cars on the main road grew sparser, the windows of the buildings around you flickering to life one by one like young stars. Here, though, as you rested your head on Jisung’s shoulder beneath a willow tree, the world seemed to stand still, and all was quiet.

You heard Jisung yelp suddenly and looked down to see a familiar dog pattering around your feet—a stray, with scraggly fur like an overgrown teddy bear that had been through the wash one too many times. It immediately pounced onto Jisung, beginning to lick your boyfriend’s face like no tomorrow.

“Oof! Hey there, old buddy.”

You laughed, scooping the dog off—only after it had gotten a few slobbery licks in—and shivered slightly as a cool night wind swept past you. Noticing, Jisung shrugged off his jacket, draping it over your shoulders as you raised a teasing eyebrow at the cliche move.

“It looks good on you,” Jisung insisted, and you laughed incredulously.

“Your jacket?” You asked, ruffling the dog’s ears as it curled up at your feet.

At that, Jisung looked back up at you—seeing the faint outline of your smile in the dark, your eyes sparkling as you looked back at him expectantly, obliviously—and in that moment, Jisung wondered what he had ever done to deserve someone as perfect as you. 

After a beat, he replied, “Happiness. Happy looks good on you, love.”

Your mouth parted in surprise—both at his words, and at the unexpected name—and Jisung took the chance to lean in and kiss you, pressing his soft lips to yours. Gently, at first — carefully, but as you began to kiss him back, you felt Jisung slowly relax. You kissed him the way you had wanted to for so long, feeling the years of distance, of heartache, of endless waiting finally unravel beneath your lips. His hands reached up to gingerly cup your face, pulling you closer into him as if he never intended to let go. 

Happy looks good on you, too, Han Jisung, you wanted to say once you pulled away, forehead still lightly pressed to his. And you deserve it, more than anything. You watched Jisung’s features come back into focus beneath the dim moonlight. His gaze was fixed on yours, filled with nothing but pure adoration, and you felt a sudden surge of warmth coursing through your chest. 

I love you, you wanted to tell him, more than you could ever know — but something in the warm yet playful look in Jisung’s eyes told you that he was already thinking the exact same thing.

So you just smiled, and leaned in to kiss him again.

                                                YOUNG GOD | END

ryu says: to you — yes, you, who has reached the end of this series! this epilogue is my way of saying a big thank you to those who stayed along for the entire wild ride that was young god. thank you for loving the characters, the world of miroh heights, and of course, the story! there are easter eggs and full-circle moments all throughout this epilogue, so i hope you enjoy and have fun finding them all ^^

disclaimer: in my opinion, all epilogues are open to interpretation: i’ve left some characters’ stories untold, some loose ends untied for this exact reason. miroh heights’ story has finally come to a close here, but what happens to the characters from this moment on continues in the reader’s mind now. 

all that cheesy, pretentious stuff aside, i hope to see you in the next story!

[fantasia-monogram]

Seven to twelve

♥️ Inseong x female reader (female anatomy); mentions of other SF9 members.

♥️  This is set in the As the clock strikes midnight universe, right after the epilogue! Read it before this one to get the context.

♥️ Smut (2.7k words); y/n is a professional Domme. Inseong is a bisexual sub. Mommy kink, degradation, spanking. Mentions of other BDSM practices.

♥️ Quality Department leader Kim Inseong has two secrets: first is his love for kink, second is a massive crush on a hot guy from HR department. Every Thursday, a trusted Domme helps him deal with frustration keeping those secrets causes.

♥️ Disclaimer: this is just for fun! I’m not claiming that’s how they are in real life, it’s just my imagination doing whatever it wants. Read at your own discretion.

As you stepped back into the dungeon, you admired the transformation the room had undergone while you were taking a shower. Your previous customer made a huge mess (still, not even comparable to the mess you've made of him). You weren't the best at cleaning - you've had other talents that got you through life, after all - so you couldn't help but be amazed at the work the cleaning staff did in such a short time. 

Gone were the wet stains on the floor, and a soiled rug had been replaced for a fresh, fluffy one. All the scary torture equipment was hidden behind partition that would automatically slide out of the nearest wall by a press of a button. Antique leather chair was switched to a cozy looking armchair with blankets laid out on the floor next to it. The mood of the otherwise pretty sterile space was warmed up thanks to pink tinted lighting. 

All of those were a tell-tale sign who your next customer would be. 

You opened the wardrobe and took a black satin-and-lace bodysuit out of it. Your usual tight corset and leather boots wouldn't be needed this time. After you put the garment on, you opted for classic shiny stilettos, and topped the outfit with a short flowy dressing gown.

Just to be sure everything was in place, you checked yourself out in the mirror on the inside of the wardrobe door: the look was a blend of a retro housewife and a pin-up girl, complete with vintage style lingerie, aggressive eyeliner and red lipstick. Just as he liked it. 

There were only minutes left to the appointment, so you stroke a couple more poses to see the outfit in different angles. Perfect. You crossed the floor in a few elegant strides, to finally take a seat on the armchair in the middle of the spacious room. 

You had a pretty chill end of the workday ahead of you. 

A soft, somewhat cautious knock on the door broke the silence. 

"Come in." 

There he was, entering hesitantly, and closing the door behind him in an awkward manner. Inseong - you had no interest in your customers' last names, it was something only the administration ladies kept for business purposes - was a tall, very tall man with broad shoulders, lanky limbs and a bit of a tummy; his face, though, was that of a teenage boy, with barely any wrinkles and nervous expression. From what he told you, he was some kind of a supervisor or a boss or something in the field of corporate banking. At that moment, however, with his black bangs covering his forehead, he was stripped out of all titles he might have held as a higher up.

Honestly, he looked pretty cute in a set of pink fleece pajamas with a print consisting of little yellow chicks. 

He stood there, big eyes looking at you anxiously. You knew he was waiting for your sign - his wish was to experience your different moods, so you always kept him uncertain for a bit. It was more fun this way. 

That night you decided to play nice, at least for a while. You put on your warmest smile, spreading your arms. 

"Come on, baby, come to Mommy!" 

Inseong didn't need to be told twice. He rushed from his place. In seconds, he sank onto his knees inbetween your spread legs. You sneaked your arms around his neck and harshly pulled him forward, only to let him plant his face right into your breasts. 

Right, he had a thing for boobs. And muscular body types. That's why he chose to pay for your services in the first place.

He stayed like this for a good minute or two, occasionally rubbing his face against your soft flesh. You kept gently patting his head this entire time, until you decided that was enough and yanked him away by a handful of hair. 

"Why don't you tell Mommy about your day, baby?" You cooed, still gripping his hair tightly. His eyes, looking even bigger, were all fired up already.

He was so easy to figure out. 

"Y-yes… Yes, Mommy, I will," he stuttered. You let go of him, so he could sink back to the floor and lie his head on your lap. 

You got back to combing your fingers through his black strands, just to keep the variety.

"There is this guy in the company…" Inseong started, his voice a bit hushed. "In another department. He's dreamy. But I don't think he's interested in me. I don't think he's interested in guys at all. Or at least in pathetic guys like me." 

You uttered a soft mhmm to encourage him. Oh, so he came in to release the frustration. You already had a plan on how to help him with that, but that required waiting for a good moment to start the actual scene. 

"I can't believe anybody would be able to resist my pretty baby," you sighed, staying in character. 

"Thank you, Mommy…" Inseong replied shyly; he knew how to behave, or rather, how to reply to your compliments. "Actually, he spends so much time with that… I can never remember her name… She's a monster. Five and barely a half feet of a goddamn monster. I've heard they want to promote her to a leadership position soon. And she's so old! I can't believe Jaeyoonie is into older women."

Your eyes went wide at the name. No way. Glad Inseong couldn't see your face right now, you quickly calmed yourself down.

"Some guys are into milfs, you know that, right, baby?" You snorted. The things you had to do just to pace the appointment right… 

"She's not a milf! She's only a year or two older than me," Inseong explained. 

Come to think of it, you had no idea how old he was, and it was hard to tell by his looks only. 

"Anyway, I'm sure he's fucking her. Or that awkward skinny boy always hanging out with them." Inseong started to sound pissed off at this point. "Now that I think of it, he could easily take them both! And that would mean he's into older women and younger guys. I don't fit into any of those demographics. What a nightmare."

"You never know," you concluded, although internally you were getting more and more suspicious of Jaeyoonie's identity. 

"But there's more…" Inseong's voice broke at the last word. "There was a company party earlier that week… I drank too much and he saw me throwing up in the bathroom… I can't believe I embarrassed myself like that…" 

That was the moment you were waiting for. You stopped your caresses immediately. 

"Wait a minute. When was that party, exactly?" 

You could feel Inseong tense up under your hand. 

"Wednesday night…" He mumbled. 

"Is that why you rescheduled from Thursday to Friday?" 

You gripped his shirt at the back of his neck. 

"Yes, Mommy… I was so hungover… I wouldn't be able to play with you…" Inseong started stumbling over his words. You slid your hand up, grasped a fistful of hair and pulled it back so he could face you in a very uncomfortable position. 

The panic that flashed through Inseong's eyes gave you a solid rush of adrenaline.

"Good boys don't drink more than they could handle," you stated in a dead serious tone. 

"B-but…" Inseong stuttered, "I have low tolerance. And everyone else was drinking…" 

You tightened the grip on his hair, eliciting a strangled whine out of him. 

"Then you shouldn't have drunk at all, you silly baby." You slowly stood up from your seat, dragging Inseong up on his knees, followed by a litany of pained whimpers. "You made Mommy sad. I've been waiting for you the entire day."

"Oh, no… I'm so sorry, Mommy…" Inseong babbled, on the verge of crying. 

Not wanting to overdo it with his emotions just yet, you let go of his hair. He barely managed to feel relief, when you forcibly grabbed his chin.

"You're Mommy's favorite boy, but you need to learn your lesson" you concluded, staring straight into his panicked eyes. "What should I do with you now?" 

Inseong went silent, nothing but anticipation pictured on his face.

"Oh, you look way too eager," you said, loosening the grip on Inseong's chin, "Go to the corner, hands on the wall." 

"No, please!" Inseong cried out, although you knew very well he was just playing along. "Not the corner!" 

"Should I make you go there on your fours?" 

The guy mumbled a barely audible I'm sorry and obediently walked to the nearest wall. He took the usual position: propped on his hands, head hanging low, his broad back facing you - obviously, with the round butt presented to you in a shameful way. 

To keep him waiting, you first took in the sight, unable to hold back a smirk. You knew soon he would be absolutely wrecked, his cheeks burning red with embarrassment and shining with tears.

Saying you loved your job would be an understatement. 

Satisfied, you approached him, clicking of your heels the only sound in the room.

"I guess I have to spank you." 

Inseong's head jerked up a little. 

"I'm going to do this through your pants, though, and I'm going to use my bare hand only."

Inseong whined, head leaning down to previous position. 

"One more complaint and I'm going to shove a plug into your hole and make you stand here for the rest of the night." 

"I'm sorry!" He apologized frantically.

It's not like you haven't done that punishment before - you smiled at the memory of him coming untouched - but he really seemed desperate for some action this time. 

You came closer and hovered your hand over the perfect curve of Inseong's butt. He trembled under your touch. So, so desperate. 

"It's gonna be thirty, because that's how many hours I had to wait between the time you rescheduled to this meeting," you announced, causing Inseong to whimper quietly.

"Can I count?" He asked shyly. 

"You're dumb enough to not know your limits, I think counting to thirty would be too much to ask." 

With that, you landed the first slap. 

You observed Inseong for a couple seconds before continuing. He didn't make a sound, but his arms shook, long fingers folding into fists against the wall. You wondered if he would even last the whole session.

Your predictions would soon turn out to be true: he started whimpering after each hit as soon as you landed the third one. When you approached the tenth, the whimpers turned into screams. Once you passed the first half, all he could do was to moan uncontrollably, his legs shaking so much you were wondering how could he even stand up at that point. 

He didn't use the safe word, not even a single word of protest escaped his mouth either, so you knew it was fine to continue. He was so close to breaking. You absolutely adored the feeling of this moment approaching.

Finally, as you were raising your hand to slap Inseong's ass for the twenty seventh time, his knees gave up. The guy sunk down to the floor, still leaning against the wall. That turned out to be too much for him, though - ultimately, he slid his hands down, too.

You looked at him intently: Inseong, resting on all fours, kept trembling, his breathing so loud you could hear it from above. What an absolute mess. You were so amused you decided to end the session on a sweet note; however, your understanding of sweet was very... specific. 

"What's that, baby? You can't take it anymore?" You cooed, approaching closer. Your shin brushed against his buttcheek.

"Mommy… I…" Inseong panted, visibly struggling to form a complete sentence. "Can I touch myself? I can't take it anymore…" 

You almost laughed at how pained his tone was. Led by curiosity, you kneeled right behind him and leaned to take a close look: indeed, he was tenting in his cute pajama pants. Pathetic.

"Mmm, I'm not sure," you mused. "I don't think you've earned the permission to touch yourself."

"Mommy, please, it hurts," Inseong pleaded. He regained the ability to speak, but his voice started breaking. 

"I want you to come, but I also want you to embarrass yourself even more, since you couldn't take your spanking like a good boy," you wondered aloud in an amused tone, "What should I do?" 

You knew exactly, but hearing Inseong hold in his breath was worth every second of suspense. 

"Anything… I'll do anything…"

Hearing that, you came to conclusion you've had enough of toying with him. You reached to ruffle his hair. He leaned into your touch like a cat.

"Dumb kittens like you don't deserve to be touched directly." 

You lodged your thigh inbetween his legs, making him moan loudly at the sudden contact. He felt hard and heavy against your skin through the fabric separating you two. 

"Work for it, baby," you commanded. 

Inseong didn't need to be told twice. Disregarding all dignity, he started grinding against your thigh, his thrusts becoming more and more furious with time, until he couldn't hold back grunts escaping his mouth. You could feel his cock getting heavier; years of having to keep your urges to yourself during sessions gave you incredible self control, but Inseong's eagerness was turning you on so much you had to think of something quick. To ground yourself, you grabbed onto his hips, helping him grind even harder. 

He looked so broken, though - with his head low on the floor, resting on his arms, and his ass high up, relying on you completely in his need for pleasure. The sounds coming out of him weren't making it any easier for you either. 

It didn't take him long to finish at this pace. He stilled, arching his back, and came with a delicious, drawn-out moan. You quickly retracted your thigh, as you felt the wetness on his pants coming in contact with your skin. 

You let him come down from his high. Once he was fine enough to sit up, you pulled him into a back hug. He sighed happily, leaning against your cleavage. 

For good measure, you planted a couple kisses on his cheek and the side of his neck, leaving bright lipstick marks all over; he giggled uncontrollably at your affectionate gesture. 

"Thank you, Mommy," Inseong purred, a smile adorning his pretty lips, "My head is so clear now. I feel so much better." 

You wondered how he could sound so innocent with a huge wet spot in the front of his pants, not to mention he probably could barely sit with his butt burning from the spanking. 

"I hope my baby has a good weekend." You kissed his cheek once again, this time letting your lips linger on his skin for a little longer. 

Inseong's legs turned out to be still too wobbly to support him, so you helped him stand up and walked him to the door. 

"You're gonna be fine in the shower?" you asked, a bit worried considering his weak state. 

"I wish Mommy would join me, but I'm a big boy. I'll manage," he assured you. 

To be honest, you wished for the same thing, but business was business, and Inseong was just your customer - no matter how much fun you had ruining him each time.

"Thank you, really. I needed that so much," he said, dropping the character. "See you next week." 

You stared at the door for a while after he left, pretty sure there was something that slipped your mind during the meeting.

At last, it hit you: Jaeyoon, probably matching Inseong's ideal buff type, working a 9-to-5 job in some corporation. Could he be your old acquaintance from the BDSM community you met at a self defense course? You wondered for a while at the possibility.

Opening the wardrobe, you briefly rested your eyes on the clock. Seven to twelve. No time to muse over the past; you hoped those two would get together eventually, because if Inseong was the supervisor Jaeyoon couldn't shut up about all those years ago, then… well, they had some catching up to do. 

[thefallennightmare]

Vas Prizrak-Eighteen

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Reader. Slight Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 2000

Warnings: swearing, some smut if I’m feeling frisky, tiny bits of fluff, and a whole lot of angst.

Summary:  Bucky and Reader’s life in Wakanda had been everything they ever wanted. But when they are told about the fight that was on it’s way to them, they fear that life would be dusted away for good.

A/N:  There are only two chapters left after this one! The final one and then an epilogue. I’m so sad that it’s ending! 

TAGS: @mggpleasedontlookhere @grey-force-jedi @austynparksandpizza @lovelyladymayyy​

“Call me if you need anything, okay?” 

The redhead nodded, giving me a small smile. “I will.” 

“Don’t be a stranger, Wanda.” 

The funeral had ending awhile ago, most of us staying behind to chat and catch up. I wasn’t sure if I’d see any of these people again so I made sure to give them all proper goodbyes.

We gave each other another hug before parting ways and I headed towards Bucky who was looking out at the waters of the lake behind the Stark home. 

My arm wrapped around his side and he snaked his arm around my shoulder, pulling me in. A soft kiss to the top of my head brought a smile to my lips. 

“You alright?” I asked. 

During the funeral, I could feel Bucky filled with so much regret; regret for not only what happened to Tony but for what The Winter Soldier did to his parents. 

“I never got to apologize to him, really, for what I did to his parents,” Bucky’s voice sounded broken so I gave him a loving squeeze. 

“It wasn't you, Buck.”

He sighed, finally looking into my eyes. “Where’s the other two trouble makers?”

I giggled at his nickname for Sam and Steve. 

“They’re with Bruce checking out the new quantum tunnel. I guess Tony had been working on another, better model.” I said. 

Bucky hummed while he led me towards the three men, who were in a heated discussion, but seized when Bucky and I walked up. 

“What's going on?” I asked with a raised brow.

Sam ran a hand over his tired face, letting out a deep sigh. We were all exhausted still, not having much time to recoup after yesterday's fight. Right after Tony’s funeral, we all decided that now would be the best time to return the stones. 

“Steve wants to return the stones himself which I think is crazy if you ask me,” Sam said. 

My eyes landed on Steve, who was already dressed in his suit, briefcase full of stones in one hand and Mjolnir in the other. 

“Can we talk alone for a minute?” I questioned. 

He nodded and we walked towards a bench that faced the lake, both sitting in silence. Steve didn’t have to say anything, however, because I already knew what he was thinking. 

“You’re not coming back?” I finally tore my gaze away from the water and looked into his eyes. 

Steve hesitated, trying to think of the right words to say. 

“What do I have left here, Y/N?” 

I scoffed, immediately feeling hurt by his choice. 

“What about me? Bucky and Sam?” I asked, pointing to them behind us. 

No matter how far away we sat from them, I knew Bucky could hear our conversation. 

He ran a hand over his face but remained silent. No matter how much I begged or pleaded to have him come back to us, his mind had been made up. Steve was going back to not only return the stones but to live a life with Peggy. 

The anger had intensified, knowing he was giving all of us up for her. 

“I can’t believe it,” I stood while shaking my head. “You’re leaving all of us behind for her?” 

Steve shrugged. “I love her, Y/N.” 

“And I love you, Steve. Just because I chose Bucky doesn’t mean you have to forget about me.” 

He stood with a start and lifted my chin with his finger, forcing me to look into his eyes. “I will never forget you, Y/N. You will always be a huge part of my life, I can’t forget someone I love.”

“Then why can’t you stay?” I wondered with a quiet sob. “Please stay.” 

Steve’s lips ghosted a kiss over my forehead. “I have to do this, Y/N.”

In the end, I knew that Steve was right. There had to have been a small part of me that understood where he was coming from, right?

Everything I had done lately for my love of Bucky was no different than Steve staying in the past so he could live a life with Peggy. We all deserved a happy ending after defeating Thanos, Steve included. 

I pulled my jacket closer to my chest and reluctantly nodded. Our arms wrapped around each other in a final hug and I left a soft, lingering, kiss on his cheek.

“We love you, Steve. I understand why you want to do this but can’t stay here and watch you. If you change your mind, you know where I’ll be,” I said, gently cupping his cheek once more. 

Tears welled in his eyes but Steve quickly blinked them away. 

No others words came through my lips, unsure of what to say exactly, so walked ahead of him while he followed behind. He wanted to say goodbye to Bucky, one final time. 

“Don’t do anything stupid until I get back,” Steve joked. 

Bucky chuckled. “How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.”

The hug between them was quick, Bucky not wanting to linger any longer around him. Even though it was Steve’s decision in the end, Bucky couldn’t agree with it. After everything they had gone through together, Steve was giving it all away for Peggy. 

I could almost see the jealousy and anger oozing out of Bucky. 

“Take care of her,” Steve nodded towards me. 

I laced my fingers with Bucky and gave Steve one final smile. “Safe travels, Stevie. I love you.” 

Bucky and I turned to walk away as tears fell from my eyes. I had lost another person I loved and cared about however the one who meant the most was still here, lightly swaying our hands together as we walked alongside the lake, far from Steve. 

“You know,” Bucky spoke after some time of quiet, “I think we should get a place on the lake. It’s quite peaceful.” 

“Remember my family’s cabin we stayed in after the fight in D.C?” I asked, the memory pushing its way forward. 

It was the first time I had shared time and made memories with Bucky, not Soldat. 

Bucky smirked and nodded. “That seems like a lifetime ago.”

“We’ve been through a lot together,” I stated. 

We came to a stop and Bucky pulled me into his chest, vibranium fingers brushing the hair out of my face. He lowered his lips, giving me a tender kiss. 

“I love you, Y/N,” Bucky gushed.

Leaning up on my toes, I gave him another quick kiss. “I love you too, Bucky.” 

We started walking again but suddenly, I remembered the surprise that I had yet to show him. 

“I have something to show you, only if you’re up for it.” I said. 

Bucky wrapped an arm around me, pulling me close again. “I’m always up for anything if you’re involved, doll.” 

“No fucking way,” Bucky gasped. 

“I know it looks a lot worse since the last time you saw it but I have so many ideas on how we can fix it all,” I babbled on while pointing to different things around us, stating how we could change things. 

“If you think about it,” I continued to ramble, “All it really needs is new flooring throughout and a good paint job. And the kitchen could use an update. Oh, the bathrooms need to be completely gutted.” 

“Doll,” Bucky reached for my hands causing me to come to a complete stop. 

He wore the pridest, widest, smile I had ever seen on his gorgeous face. It was the type of smile that made the corners of your eyes crinkle. 

“You bought my childhood home?” He asked. 

I nodded but grew anxious the longer he stared into my eyes. “Should I not have? Was that too weird?” 

Bucky hushed my ramblings with a kiss. 

“I fucking love you, doll. I can’t believe you did that,” Bucky mused against my lips. 

Our fingers laced together and I pulled him along, filling him in on how we could fix things and update the home to its former glory. 

The dining room had a huge window that when the sun would set int he evenings, it would cast the home in an orange hue. 

We could tear down the wall between the kitchen and living room, giving the home a large open concept. 

There were three bathrooms total, all of which needed to be completely gutted. 

Out of the five bedrooms, I guided Bucky towards my favorite one. His old bedroom. 

“I know your room was the smallest but what if we tear down that wall,” I pointed to the one opposite of us, “And connect the two rooms. I really love how large the windows are in here. We could put in a set of French doors that lead out onto a deck.” 

“That all sounds amazing, Y/N.” 

Bucky had not stopped smiling since we stepped foot through the threshold. He knew immediately where we were the second I had turned on the street. 

“The agent told me that there’s a small lake behind all of those trees. I tried to get in contact with the man that owns that land to see if he was willing to see but I guess he disappeared with the snap,” I stated while we turned to look out the large window in the room. 

A small chuckle erupted from Bucky’s throat, earning a confused look on my end. 

“What?” I questioned. 

“Names James Buchanan Barnes. I heard you were interested in buying my land,” Bucky extended his hand towards me, wanting me to shake it. 

“I’m sorry, what?” 

Confusion was an understatement on how I felt at the moment. 

“Before I went to war, back in the 40’s, my parents surprised me with that piece of land. They wanted me to have something that I would be able to make a home on and raise my family close to them,” Bucky shared. 

My lips parted slightly at his words. Between the both of us, we had now owned just over two acres of land?

“I can’t believe it,” I laughed, shocked. 

Bucky wrapped his arms around me from behind, placing a kiss on the top of my head. 

“Thank you for this, doll. I can’t wait until we fix this up and start raising our family here,” he mused, thinking of his exciting future ahead. 

I turned into his arms, snaking my arms around his neck. “You want to have a family with me?” 

Bucky’s eyes shone with so much love and purpose. I could feel the pride emanating from his soul. 

“Y/N, I want to live with you for the rest of my life, even when we’re ghosts. I don’t want to experience this life with anyone else,” Bucky sealed the admission with a kiss. 

Suddenly I had remembered that there was one more final thing I had to tell him. I knew that with this news he wouldn’t be so happy. As I opened my lips to speak, Bucky had beat me to it, rambling on about ways we could fix up the rest of the house and the backyard. 

He spoke with so much purpose for the future, our future, and it brought tears to my eyes knowing that after the hell of a life he had, he was excited for something. Bucky had a future to look forward too that didn’t involve death or heartbreak. It involved us and as much as he didn’t want to admit it, Sam. He was all we had left and I refused to leave him behind, even if Bucky tried to kill him. 

With a silent nod, I had decided to keep that final secret of losing our child in the snap to myself. 

“Buck,” my voice came out husky and raw. “Why don’t we head back to the hotel to celebrate?” 

Seeing how excited he was for our future brought immediate warmth to my core and the itch to feel him between my legs again. 

Without a second thought, Bucky’s pupils turned dark with lust as he lifted me onto his shoulder and ran out of our home. We didn’t want to waste any more time.

[world-of-aus]

I’ll be there for you - Part 3

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Word Count: 5,211

Warnings: pinch of angst at the beginning, wholesome fluff throughout.

Author’s Note: So sorry this took me awhile to bring out, mom life caught up to me! Honestly half of this series was based off my two pregnancies, so i hope you all enjoyed this little series. There will be an epilogue, as i can’t bring myself to not give you one more part of wholesome barnes family fluff. Thank you all for reading and to those that enjoy my work, i love you with my whole heart, happy readings!

SERIES MASTERLIST

“Y/n, please don’t do this, you don’t even know the guy, you only met him once, and may I add the both of you were very drunk, you don’t need to do this.”

Another sigh fell from your lips as you turned to face Bucky, “Buck I can’t just back out, my coworkers told him about me, about the baby,” you said gesturing down to your 6 month bump, “he wants to talk, that’s it, that’s all he said, he just wants to talk.”

Bucky paced the living room, “what if he tries something, what if he wants to be there, to be there for the baby?”  

A groan fell from your lips, your hands flew up in the air in frustration, “and what would be so wrong with that?” you questioned, “he’s the father, he has a right to be there for the baby if he chooses too, this is his baby.”

You were frustrated, had been frustrated for a while now, your coworkers hadn’t let up about helping you find the dad when you finally came out to them you were pregnant. You hadn’t even wanted to tell them about it, but there had been only so much you could do to cover your ever-growing bump at work. It’s as if your bump had grown overnight once you had crossed the five-month mark and the minute they laid eyes on it, you knew you were in for it with the onslaught of questions they had thrown at you that morning. You had to explain everything, even explained your new relationship with Bucky, you had assured them you didn’t need to know who’s the baby’s father was because Bucky was going to be an amazing one, and he had showed you every day since that night you two had decided to take the next step with one another. Your coworkers simply hadn’t let up, and made it their duty to track down your one-night stand, you didn’t think anything would come of it, you were content with how things were now. Until one morning your coworkers waltzed over to you completely giddy telling you they had tracked him down, they had even set the two of you up to get coffee. You had tried to get out of it saying you had a doctor's appointment that afternoon, which you did, but they wouldn’t let up. You had even argued that they had done this behind your back, and you just weren't comfortable, but all of it was to no avail, they had guilted you yet again.

“Get coffee with him early in the morning, and then you can head to your doctor’s appointment, maybe he can come with.” One of them had chimed in.

“I can’t have coffee,” you had muttered, “Bucky will be there, I don’t need anybody else by my side.”

“He’s the father y/n, he deserves to be there if he wants to be.”

They hadn’t left you alone, not even after you agreed to meet with him, any chance they got they were there to remind you. Every. Single. Day. So  your frustration had only grown, and now you were seemingly taking it out on the last person you wanted to.

“But y/n,” Bucky tried to reason.

“Enough!” You hissed, “he’s the father Bucky, this is his child, if he wants to be there, he’s going to be.”

“But -”

“But nothing, he’s the dad, you’re not, so drop it.” You growled, Bucky’s face fell at your words, his head dropped. Your heart dropped in your chest, realization dawning over you at what you had just said.

“Bucky I’m so sor-”

He held up his hand shaking his head, “it’s fine, I get it,” he grunted, “he’s the dad,” he shook his head again as he turned on his heel the anger evident in his form, “I’ll see you later,” he muttered not looking at you.

“At my appointment?” You questioned lowly.

You heard him scoff before he turned to glare at you over his shoulder, “no, the dad will be there, you don’t need me.”

Your face fell, you had really done it this time, “Bucky please, I didn’t mean it like that, I was just so frustrated, I didn’t mean-”

“You may not have “meant it”, but you still said it, I’ll be home later, hope your appointment goes good.” He muttered before he was pulling open the door the wooden structure slamming behind him.

A lone tear fell from your eye as you numbly gathered your things, you just wanted this day to be over.

“So how many months are you?”

You looked up at the stranger in front of you, he looked frightened, he was literally on the edge of his seat, “I’m six months,” you murmured looking down at the glass of untouched orange juice in front of you.

“Nice,” you cringed internally, god this guy was a piece of work what had you even saw in him that night?

“Is it a boy or a girl?”

You looked up at him prepared to give him a short answer only to find his eyes weren’t on you no longer feigning interest, his eyes were now glued to the ass of the waiter a few tables behind you, “I’m not sure,” you muttered, “I had chosen to keep it a secret.” You kept your eyes on him, his eyes stayed glued to her behind, yup definitely a piece of work, you didn’t want this in your life, not like he would pay you any attention anyway.

You scoffed, he looked up at you eyes wide having been caught, "look I’m not holding you to this, it’s obvious you’re not ready,” you muttered, throwing the napkin down to the table, signaling for the waitress.

His head dipped slightly, “I’m sorry, and you’re right I’m not ready for this, it was completely un expected” he sighed rubbing at the back of his neck, “but it happened and I should have been more responsible, is there any way I could help?”

You took a second to let his question settle over you, did you need his help? You knew you didn’t, you had Bucky, or at least you had had him. Regardless of that, you knew you could very well do this alone, you didn’t need his help, you had gotten this far without him, thanks to Bucky. As your mind kept returning to your Best-friend you realized just how badly you had messed up, you shouldn’t have listened to your coworkers, you should have just told them to stop, told them to leave it alone, you had been happy, everything had been going so well. And now, now you weren’t even sure where you stood, you may actually have to do this alone, and there would be no one to blame but yourself.

You shook your head, “you’ve done enough,” you murmured, “if you don’t mind I really need to get going, I have a doctors appointment I need to be getting to.” You said grabbing your things as you stood.

“Right well I’ll take care of this for you,” he replied, he almost looked relieved, you were regretting ever agreeing to this by the second.

“Thanks,” you muttered turning on your heel, a scoff falling from your lips when you chanced him a second glance and he was already all over the waiter from earlier.

You made it to your doctor's appointment with 5 minutes to spare, signing in you took the seat closest to you. Your leg bounced erratically as you watched the front door, a small part of you hoped that Bucky would still show even after the events that occurred this morning, but as your name was called out, your heart fell, he really wasn’t coming. What had you been expecting though, you had been horrible to him, when he had been your shoulder to lean on this entire time, he didn’t deserve those awful words that you had spewed out at him, father to this baby or not, he had been there.

Grabbing your things, you stood making your way to the door giving the nurse a forced smile. Giving one last glance at the front door you hoped that you might catch a glimpse of Bucky running in, but there was nothing. Your head fell, your heart clenching in your chest, you supposed you had your answer, you were going to do this alone.

“Good afternoon y/n, how are we feeling today” the doctor questioned as she entered the room, immediately getting to work on setting up the equipment.

“I’m okay,” you replied swallowing the knot in your throat, “uhm I know I said I wanted to keep the gender a secret, but do you think you could tell me what I'm having?” you questioned softly.

“Of course, momma, once I have the screen set up, we can go ahead and let you know,” she replied giving you a warm smile.

“alright, well we’re all set here, go ahead and lie back for me,” she instructed helping you lean back, “was dad not going to be able to be here?” she questioned as she lifted your shirt.

“no, I don’t-”

You were cut off by three sharp knocks at the door. The doctor turned towards the door yelling a quick “come in”, the door opened revealing the same nurse who had brought you in she smiled brightly, “we have a late arrival,” she informed the doctor.

Bucky appeared behind her; his face was flushed as he surveyed the room, he took notice of you on the bed, looking at the chair next to it and seemingly relaxing as he noticed it was unoccupied.

“Sorry I'm late,” he said quietly as he walked into the room.

Bucky’s eyes couldn’t quite meet your as he made his way into the room, “No problem,” the doctor chirped, “we were just getting started, mom wanted to find out the gender, so you’re just in time, glad you could make it.” She motioned towards the chair by your side, Bucky made his way over, taking a seat sliding his chair in closer. He was staring intently at the screen, his eyes just wouldn’t meet yours, tears pulled at your eyes.  

You glanced up willing the tears away, “awe mom doesn’t get emotional just yet, let me put your little peanut up on this screen first.” the doctor chuckled, patting your thigh. You mentally cursed, you were hoping she wouldn’t take notice, out of the corner of your eye you could see Bucky’s eyes snap to yours but you didn’t dare look his way in fear of breaking further. A frown graced his features, his hand reaching out to take yours in his tightly, leaning down he place a gentle kiss to the back of your hand.

“Well now that dad’s here, let’s go ahead and get started,” she replied as she lifted up your shirt.

Bucky squeezed your hand and you couldn’t help yourself as you turned your head to look at him, only to find he was staring straight ahead his eyes intently on the screen. He must have sensed your eyes on him, his eyes meeting yours briefly before they were glancing down at your bump the doctor was rubbing the wand over, he smiled warmly before his face fell slightly, almost as if he was remembering the events of this morning. How badly you wanted to reach out to him and let him know that everything would be okay, but you weren't sure if it would be. You squeezed his hand a little tighter as the doctor continued to swirl the wand around your swollen bump, “so do you have any preferences?” The doctor questioned turning to the two of you.

“Preferably healthy,” you answered, the Doctor chuckled.

“Of course, we would want nothing more, what about dad?” She asked turning towards Bucky.

You could see him visibly swallow “a girl,” he had said it so softly you almost hadn’t heard him.

The doctor gave him a warm smile, “well let’s see what we have here,” she spoke as the three of you intently watched the screen warp as she moved the wand around around pressing it into you.

“Alright you two, it looks like you’re having a- ” the doctor paused, you waited with baited breath, “a beautiful baby girl,” she turned to look at Bucky, “congrats dad, you were right!” She beamed.

You couldn’t help the tears that now rolled freely down your face, “hope those are happy tears mom,” the doctor said looking over at you. You nodded your head as the tears continued to flow. The doctor handed you pictures of your sonogram and a tissue. “Alright you two, everything looked great, baby’s growing great too, soon enough our appointments will move from four weeks to two, then one as we get closer, for now just head up to the front for your next appointment, should anything occur you just give us a call.” she smiled.

You sat up slowly as the doctor exited the room, rolling your shirt back down over your bump. There were so many things you wanted to say, but you weren't sure where to even start, did he even want to talk to you, had he been forced into coming here? The tension in the room was starting to scratch at you, it was nearly suffocating. You slipped from the bed gathering your things, Bucky following after you, still no words shared between the two of you, god you needed to get out. You reached the receptionist who quickly handed you your next appointment card before thanking you with a cheery smile. You nearly took the door out with how quickly you strode out, it was getting harder to breathe.

You broke through the front door, turning to the side quickly, you needed to get home. “Woah, doll, calm down.” Bucky gruffed grabbing ahold of your bicep keeping you from taking another step. You took in a shuddering breath, the tears on the verge of falling again, “Bucky please,” you pleaded, “please just let me go.”

He turned you to face him, “is that what you want, you want me to let you go?” he questioned. His hand slid under your chin pulling you to look at him, his eyes capturing yours right away, “tell me, is that what you want?”

Your lower lip trembled, eyes glistening with tears, you shook your head, “No,” you whispered, “but I don’t deserve you after those terrible things I said, you didn’t deserve it, and I should have never said them, I should have never agreed to this stupid meeting, he didn’t care, he was never going to care, everything was going so good for me, everything was at peace, I was happy, and now,” you took in a shuddering breath, “now I ruined everything, and I’m going to have to do this alone.”  

Bucky let out a sigh before he was pulling you into his arms tightly his head falling on yours as he let you cry into his chest, another sigh left his lips as he rubbed your back soothingly, “Now where did you get the idea that you were going to do this alone?” he questioned into your hair.

You moved away from him slightly so you could get a better look at his face, “But bucky I-"

“But nothing sweetheart,” he murmured, “I’m not sure if you remember, but when we decided to take the next step in our relationship i told you, this changes everything for me, I want to be there for you in more ways than one, since the first moment you told me about your dreams you made me realize I wanted that too, and for every moment after that that it was brought up I began to realize it was you who I wanted that with, now doll I intend to keep my word, I wasn’t going to let you do this alone.”  he assured you.

Your heart swelled in your chest, tears pooling in your eyes, “But how could you be so forgiving, I was such a jerk to you,” you muttered letting your head fall into his chest.

He chuckled his chest vibrating against your head, “sweetheart, I should have been more understanding to some degree, you were right, I’m not the father, but I very much want to be” he added when he saw you wanted to cut him off, “I want this with you, and even though that little girl growing inside of you is not mine by blood, if you’ll let me, I want to love the both of you the way you two deserve to be loved.”

Your hands came up to cup his cheeks, “How did I ever get so lucky with you,” you whispered, “I’m so sorry for being a jerk, I should have never let my coworkers talk me into this,” you sighed, “I really am sorry, and I wouldn’t want to do this with anyone else except you.” you murmured.

Bucky leaned down placing a gentle kiss to the top of your head, “I know babe, I know, let’s get you home, I think you’ve had enough for one day.” He said as he adjusted his arms around you, tucking you into his side.

“Bucky, I can barely walk as it is, covering my eyes is making it like ten times harder,” you said, trying your hardest  to sound annoyed but the  amusement in your voice was slipping through as a smile tugged at your lips..

He chuckled. “Come on doll, trust me, I won’t let anything happen to you, besides were almost there.”

“Were inside of our home,” you noted, “what’s in here that you could possibly want to surprised me with?” you asked with a laugh.

“You’ll see,” he said and you didn’t have to be looking at him to know he was smirking.

The two of you had only gotten home from having dinner with your friends about a half an hour ago. The team had decided to throw you a small baby shower, in the comfort of your closest friends, no coworkers in sight thankfully. You had not been expecting it, you had just been expecting to go to dinner like you recently had been doing, but Bucky and the team had managed to surprise you to say the least. You were an emotional mess the entire time, ugly crying was a huge understatement compared to the mess you were. You didn’t realize how loved your child was by the team already, “Buck’s always talking the two of you up, course we were going to fall in love too,” Sam had spoken up throwing a wink at you.  

It had only made you cry harder, “Jesus Sam why did you have to go and make my girl cry harder,” Bucky chuckled pulling you into his side.  

You looked up at Bucky with glistening eyes, lip trembling, “your girl?” you questioned.  

“oh man here we go again,” Sam laughed watching as your face contorted into a tearful one, and it was anything but pretty. Bucky had managed to calm you down after a while, though you had reassured him they were happy tears, “you sure?” Sam had butted in, “because if you're not happy and Barnes is keeping you hostage blink once to let us know.” You couldn’t help the laugh that escaped you, “Bucky isn’t keeping me hostage Wilson, but if he ever does ill let you know.”

The rest of the night had been filled with laughter, your heart was filled with the utmost love, you almost didn’t want to leave when Bucky had announced it was time to get you home. You had almost put up a fight, almost, had it not been for Bucky's promise of a surprise. From the second you had entered the threshold of your home Bucky had been a ball of nerves.

Your face was laced with concern as Bucky led you over to the couch helping you to sit, “Don’t you dare move from that spot till I get back,” he had said, maybe you should have blinked once at dinner. You watched as Bucky retreated down the hallway disappearing into one of the rooms. A few minutes later and Bucky was returning, he had the brightest smile on his face as he rounded the couch extending his hands out to you. You placed your hands in his as he pulled you up, as soon as you were standing, he had pushed you forward slowly leading you to where you were now.  

“Alright sweetheart, you can go ahead and open those gorgeous eyes for me,” he whispered as his hands fell from your eyes finding a new home on your waist.

Your brows furrowed in confusion. “My bedroom?” you questioned looking at him over your shoulder.

“not sure you could call it that anymore,” he said, a smile in his voice.

“What, what do you mean?” you questioned with a confused laugh.

His hand reached around you, gripping the doorknob and twisting it slightly. He gave it a gentle push and let the door swing open.

“The nursery.” He said simply, a smile in his voice.

“Bucky,” you gasped quietly.

You took in the room; the white walls were now painted a pastel pink, small white lights circled the ceiling creating the illusion of a starry sky. There was a white wooden crib off to the right where your bed used to be, a golden star mobile floating above it. There was a changing table and a dresser, a bassinet and rocking chair over in the corner. The room was filled with all the gifts Bucky and you had received over the months from the team, everything from various baby clothes to an immense number of plush toys.

You walked further into the room taking everything in, your heart swelled in your chest, at the wording that lay above the crib, “I love you to the moon and back”. “Bucky this is beautiful” you said softly turning to face him, “when did you do this?” you questioned. Well you’ve been so busy with the project at work, I had those extra hours when you were out to put this together,” he smiled.

“so, is that why you’ve been holding me hostage in your room?” you questioned with a teasing smile.

He closed in on you his arms wrapping around you, “I don’t recall you complaining though,” he murmured as he leaned closer to you his lips hovering just over yours.

“So, does this mean I'll be moving into your room?” you questioned your lips brushing his.

“it looks like that,” he murmured his lips pressing to yours, “mmm, hope you don’t mind.”

The last weeks of your pregnancy were coming to a near, and you weren't sure how much farther your stomach could stretch, you were at your breaking point, every moment of every day you felt more and more like a beached whale. Your clothes was uncomfortable, your feet were always swollen, you were always craving food at random hours of the night, and recently the braxton hicks had really started to kick in, which always had you and Bucky on the edge of your seats the closer you got. The only plus side to all of this had to the increase of your libido, there wasn’t a second of your day that wasn’t filled with the desire to jump Bucky’s bones, not that he minded in the least, he would always tell you the two of you were making up for lost time.  

You were currently soaking in the bath, your body lax from the pleasure you had just experienced, you didn’t think you could ever get tired of those moment with Bucky. Your hands and feet were pruned from the soak, you truly couldn’t bring yourself to part from the tub.

“Hey sweetheart,” Bucky grinned, you turned your head to see him leaning against the bathroom door, “You think you ready to get out of that tub, you’ve been in there for a while, I'm beginning to think you’re trying to turn into a fish at this point,” he teased.

You grinned up at him lazily, “it's so comfy Buck, come join me,” you murmured making grabby hands at him.

Bucky chuckled shaking his head as he kicked off from the door, “alright doll, let’s get you out of there and get you into something more comfortable.”

“and that would be?” you questioned as he helped pull you from the tub.

“our bed,” he smiled as he handed you a towel, “Jesus sweetheart you were soaked,” he joked noticing how damp the carpet beneath you had gotten.

He met your eyes only to find them wide in horror, “y/n, what's wrong?” he questioned concerned.

“I, uhm, I think it’s time.” you murmured.

“time for what?” he questioned face scrunched in confusion.

A blank expression washed over your face, you let your words process in his head. His eyes suddenly widened matching your previous expression, before a look of sheer panic washed over his face.

“shit, okay, uhm, okay,” he said as he grabbed ahold of your face leaning down to place a firm kiss to your lips. Bucky turned on his heels as he ran out of the bathroom, running around your shared room as he grabbed the hospital bags. You made your way slowly to the bedroom, already finding some clothes on the bed that Bucky had laid out for you. You suddenly heard Bucky yell from the kitchen, you smiled widely as you heard the excitement in his voice, with the tiniest hint of panic in his voice.

“I’m going to be a dad!”

“You’re doing great sweetheart, you’re doing so good,” Bucky soothed his fingers running through your sweet slicked hair.

A pained groan left your lips as you pushed back into the bed, your hand squeezing Bucky’s tightly. You held back the urge to cry out, the pain was never ending, “you’re doing so good y/n, take in big breaths,” the doctor instructed, “alright y/n I'm going to need you to give me one big push, when I tell you alright, give me the strongest push you can.” she encouraged as she looked from you to the screen keeping track of your contractions.

You nodded your head weakly; the doctor gave you the go ahead and you pushed with all the strength you could muster. The screams that you had held in tore from you as you bore your body down, pushing with all you had. “Wonderful y/n,” the doctor praised, “I see the head, let’s take some breaths again, I'm going to need you to do the same thing again.”

You shook your head, you couldn’t it, the pain was too much, you didn’t think you could go again, you wanted it to be over. You looked at Bucky with tear filled eyes, “I can’t, it hurts so much,” you whimpered.

Bucky's hands removed itself from your hair to rest on your feverish cheek, “yes you can baby, you can do this, the pain will be over soon, our little girl is almost out, you just got to give them a few more pushes sweetheart.” he murmured placing a kiss to your head.

The doctor told you to push again, the pain tore through you as you once again pushed with all the strength you could muster, another scream fell from your lips. “She’s almost here,” Bucky murmured in awe, “just one more push y/n, give me one big push, and your little girl will be here,” the doctor announced. The doctor counted to three, and with the help of the nurses and Bucky’s encouraging words, you pushed for the final time, your body falling lax into the bed, the second you heard the tiny wails fill the room.

Your little girl was placed onto your chest, a choked sob fell from your lips, as you held her closely, your lips kissing her crown, “she’s so beautiful,” you whispered, your glossy eyes looking up towards Bucky, his own filled with tears.

“beautiful just like her mother,” he smiled tearily leaning down to capture your lips in a warm kiss, “I love you so much sweetheart, you did so good,” he whispered as he pulled away, his forehead leaning on yours.

“Would dad like to do the honors?” the doctor questioned pulling the two of you from your moment, a pair of scissors held out to him.

He looked from you to the scissors than back to you, you smiled up at him, nothing but love in your eyes for the man, “go ahead daddy,”  His eyes filled with tears as he followed the nurses to the other side of the room.

You had never had any doubts that Bucky would be an amazing father, but as he stood in the corner of the hospital room soothing your daughter, you knew you had been right. He was so careful with her, dotting over her anytime she fussed, if even for a second. Your daughter knew as much, because just like she had Bucky wrapped around her tiny finger, Bucky had her as well.

Bucky finally turned to face you, “hey there doll, how long you been staring?” he questioned as he walked over to you, your daughter tucked tightly in his arms.

“Long enough,” you smiled, leaning up to meet his lips in a sweet kiss.

You moved over slightly in the bed allowing Bucky to slide in next to you, “she’s so beautiful,” you murmured as you leaned against Bucky’s shoulders.

“I’m telling you just like her momma,” he grinned, adjusting her in his arms so he could pass her to you. Bucky’s empty arms wrapped themselves around the both of you, you swore the minute she was placed in your arms you fell more in love than you had before. The nervousness and doubts that you had ever had disappeared the moment you looked into those beautiful brown eyes. You couldn’t even begin to explain what it was like to hold and look at someone that you had created. To say you felt like you were on cloud 9 was a complete understatement to the emotions that were coursing through you.

“What are you thinking about sweetheart?” Bucky questioned.

“Just thinking how beautiful life is right now,” you replied turning to look at him, “like it’s so hard to believe I'm here right now, I would have never imagined this, I honestly never thought I'd be here with you, but I'm so glad it all happened like it did, because I wouldn’t change it for a thing, you’ve made me so happy Bucky Barnes.”

“everything you just said times ten,” he smiled, leaning down to capture you lips in a passionate kiss, you eventually found the will to tear your lips from each other, his forehead resting against yours.

“I love you,” you whispered your eyes meeting his.

“I love you too sweetheart,” he breathed before looking down at the pink bundle in your arms, “and I love you Winifred Rose Barnes,”

Your heart melted in your chest as your head leaned against Bucky’s shoulder, you were right where you needed to be.

I’ll be there for you Tag-list:

@minillamakeup-blog​ @unlistedpond​ @introvertatitsfinest​ @laughsandlivia​

[kiraswritten]

A Soldier Told Me (Reader x Bucky) | end

(REPOST)

pairing: reader x bucky barnes warnings: cursing, smut, unprotected sex, 18+ ONLY, fluff, sarge kink, dirty talk summary: Steve rarely gets drunk but once he drinks the liquor Thor brings from Asgard, the man will tell you anything AND everything…

a.n: thank you so much for reading! i really liked writing this and i apologize for the lateness of this last part!

i think i’ll write an epilogue involving steve ;) but who knows, ive never written a threesome before… so.. yeah! LOL enjoy!

MASTERLIST

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six (end)

You found yourself staring at the ceiling one morning, a smile on your lips. Bucky was still fast asleep, his flesh arm draped across your waist, his face smushed on his pillow.

To think this all started because Steve got drunk out of his mind. You let out a small giggle, quiet enough so that Bucky wouldn’t wake up.

Dating Bucky was like being in a romantic comedy but even better, which to your disbelief was your new reality.

All your worries about being in a relationship and being an Avenger were immediately squashed; you were scared that if the two of you were in the field he’d become reckless and unnecessarily protect you.

Because you were teammates first, he fully trusted your abilities; in fact, the two of you worked even better as a duo on missions, surprising everyone in the process.

“It’s cause Barnes finally got laid.” Sam joked, earning him a jab to his side by Steve.

You turn your attention to the man next to you, you sandwich your hands between your head and your pillow, watching Bucky sleep.

He looked so serene and peaceful, you heard him softly snoring, making you bite down on your lip to prevent yourself from smiling any bigger, the simple things make you swoon over him.

You reach out to cup his cheek, rubbing your thumb against his skin Bucky melts into your touch, his lips curving into a smile.

“Mornin’ Love,” He says huskily, thank god for his morning voice. “When’d you come back, ‘think I fell asleep before you came back.”

“I got back a little after three, sorry I came home so late.” you said, inching closer towards him.

Bucky shook his head, he rubbed one of his eyes, finally opening them.

“Don’t be sorry Darlin’, it comes with the job.” He wraps his flesh arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “Now give me a kiss, been missin’ you for days.”

You roll your eyes at him, you’d never get tired of his cheesiness, “I was only gone for two days Baby.”

Bucky leans his face close to yours, rubbing his nose with yours, “Two days is too long, the max I can take being apart from you is ten minutes and that’s already pushin’ it.”

You scrunch your nose, finally giving in and pressing a kiss onto his lips. The second you pull away, Bucky frowns, “that’s it?”

“Buck, morning breath,”

“Must we go through this every morning when I wanna kiss my best girl? Don’t care about morning breath, I kissed you after you ate that God awful green-”

You puff out your cheeks, lightly hitting Bucky’s chest.

Bucky lets out a breathless sigh, amused by your actions. “Just lemme kiss you”

It starts off slow, your lips against his, Bucky’s always made kissing feel special, as if each time was the first; the force behind the kiss barely there till you grow impatient and push back harder.

Bucky does this on purpose, teasing you till you initiate, his hands running down your sides, his metal hand gripping at your waist, his daft fingers playing with waistband of your shorts, amused you had no underwear on.

His fingers drag down your skin, Bucky groans against your lips, “Finally listening to me Darlin’?”

“Shut up, I’m running out of cute underwear cause you keep ripping them off.”

Bucky chuckles, “Can’t say I’m sorry, those things look amazing on you but I’m too impatient to wait,”

Before you could reply, you felt his touch ghosts at your entrance, you let out a sigh.

“Let ‘em out Darlin’, God I love the noises ya make, get me so hard so quick,” He pushes a finger into your core, your slick covering his finger with your juices. Bucky pumps his finger into you, slowly, your eyes shut, gripping onto the sheets.

Bucky adds another finger inside, stretching you slowly, “Fuck, your clenching on me so tight, need to loosen you up so you can take me Darlin’,”

“Fuck,” you gasped as he added the third one in, pumping his fingers quicker.

“Like my fingers stretching ya out Doll? Fuck, you’re soaked,” He grins, drinking up the sight of you falling apart under his touch. He squeezes your left breast, rolling your nipples between his index and middle fingers. “Tell me, how much do ya’ like it?” He teases.

“Ff-uck, I love it Buck, I love your fingers,” you suck in a breath, “Please Buck, need you, need your co-ck f-UCK!” You yelp out, Bucky hitting your g-spot with his fingers, you began matching his pace, fucking yourself onto his fingers.

Bucky lets go of your breast and grips your hips still. He pulls his fingers out, his hand completely drenched in you. He takes all three fingers into his mouth and sucks, moaning at the taste of your juices.

“Delicious,”

You whimper at the loss, your body humming with anticipation.

“You look so good, fuck, you need my cock don’t ya Doll? Need me to fill ya?” He grins mischievously already thinking of the various positions he wants to put you in.

He pushes the head of his cock past your folds, both his hands wrapped around your wrists, pinning them down above your head, you whimper ‘yes’ as he slides his cock inside you, slowly, letting you feel him, letting your walls clench around his hardened cock.

With each movement you feel your pleasure build up once more.

“S’fuckin’ good, so fuckin’ good, can’t get enough of ya’Doll, your pussy’s mine, fuck, all mine.” He groans, he brings down his head down to your neck, pressing kisses against your skin till he reaches your pulse point, he licks a stripe down, making you shudder.

“It’s all I think about when you’re gone, your moans, your face, how you feel-”

“Buck, please,” You gasp, unable to finish your sentence.

Bucky’s taking too long for your liking, and he knows it. He knew how to get you so wound up, a single thrust could trigger your orgasm.

“Please what Darlin’?” He teased, his hot breath against your skin.

“Sarge, fuck me, please,” you gasp, feeling his teeth bite down your skin, Bucky grunts as he pulls out halfway then thrusting into you deeply.

“Fuck!” You yell out, “Yes, yes, yes, yes!” you chant as Bucky’s thrusts grow deeper and deeper, “Fuck me hard, Sarge!” You moan wantonly.  

“The mouth on you, fuck, Darlin, you feel so good,” He grunts, beads of sweat falling down his forehead. “So fuckin’ dirty and all mine,”

With each thrust your orgasm builds, the familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach growing.

“Bucky!” It was already to much for you, your grip on the sheets could only do so much to prevent yourself from coming once more, Bucky was hitting you in all the right places.

“Don’t cum yet Darlin’, wait for me,” He tells you, noticing how close you were to your orgasm.

“Please Bucky, I-I can’t-”

He groans, “Hold on for me Doll, just wait,” he pulls out suddenly, flipping you over so that your entire front pressed against the bed, Bucky slides himself back inside you with ease.

Bucky tilts your head upward meeting him in another searing kiss, your eyes shut, fingers pulling at the bedding as he thrusts hard cock in and out.

You pull away from the kiss, taking a huge gulp of breath, “Please Buck, I c-can’t. I need to-fuck Bucky, I need to cum!”

His hand is still at your neck, making you look up at him as his eyes glaze over with lust, Bucky’s eyes roll back, his tongue licking his bottom lip as he lazily looks down at you with hungry eyes.

“Bucky please, fuck oh fuck,”

You suck in a breath, harshly biting down on your bottom lip as he hits your spot perfectly, “fuckfuckfuckfuck!” you curse, shutting your eyes tightly.

“So fucking good, fuck, Baby I’m so close, come for me, cum!” He growls, you press your face onto the bed as his hands fly down at your waist, forcefully pulling your hips to meet his thrust, his cock hitting your g-spot over and over.

Bucky’s kisses your shoulder blade before he groans against your skin, emptying himself inside of you as the two of you came, your whole body buzzing at the amount of pleasure.

His thrusts grew sloppy and slow until his lower body collapses on top of yours, his arms holding himself up so that he wasn’t crushing you fully, you feel him start to place soft kisses against your back.

“You’re incredible.” He mumbles against your skin, letting his soft cock slide out of you, the mixture of your juices dripping down your thighs.

“Hold on,” He says, pushing himself off of you, walking into the bathroom to retrieve a washcloth.

Once you were all cleaned up, Bucky quickly changes the bedding, dumping all of sheets as well as your clothing into the laundry bin. In record time the two of you are cuddling once more in bed under the warm comforter, your head resting on Bucky’s flesh arm.

You could feel Bucky’s gaze on you as you lazily drew circles on his chest, your face began to heat up, making him chuckle, “Am I staring at you too much?”

You grin, shaking your head no.

“Sometimes it still feels so unreal I guess… I feel like the luckiest woman alive being with the love of my life.” you say.

Bucky leans in for a soft kiss, a smile growing on his lips, “I love you too Darlin’ I feel the same way.”

[imagining-supernatural]

The End

Epilogue of Seventy Percent

Series Summary: When you left on your trip to Vegas, you’d planned on letting loose for one last weekend before heading back to reality and getting your affairs in order so your best friend wouldn’t be left cleaning up your mess when your cancer finally ended your life. What you hadn’t counted on was waking up married to a celebrity who has a knight-in-shining-armor complex, connections with an oncologist, and amazing insurance…

Chapter Summary:  You take a stroll down memory lane for a few of your “firsts” with Sebastian

Word Count: 1,146

"Alright, round one!"

The Roots played hype-up music as Jimmy Fallon drew out the tension. You got into the competitive spirit and narrowed your eyes at Sebastian, mouthing the words 'You're going down.'

"What did you do on your first date?"

Well shit. Both you and Seb stared at each other with wide eyes, thinking over your complicated relationship. Which encounter would you classify as your first date? Your wedding? The MET? The first time you went to the hospital together?

A long moment later, Seb nodded to himself and started writing on his pad of paper.

Well, you thought, here goes nothing.

You wrote a single word and looked up to see that he was still scribbling.

"Looks like you guys have different ideas of what your first date was," Jimmy observed.

From over at the podium, Steve Higgins dropped in his two cents, "Hope this doesn't make problems for you two."

Sebastian finally finished and held his pad close to his chest. "I'm pretty sure we had at least five different first dates depending on how you classify a first date."

"Well, let's see how you two classify it. Y/N, since you finished first, why don't you show yours first?"

A drum roll came from the other side of the room and you flipped your paper around to show the word Hamilton.

"On Broadway?"

"Yeah. We were waiting for the first round of tests to come back to see if the oncologist could do anything and he took me to Hamilton."

"Mmm," Seb hummed. "That's a good one. But it's not our first date."

He flipped his around and Jimmy read it aloud, "Breakfast the morning after we got married before we went to get an annulment."

"If I recall correctly,” Sebastian said, almost smugly. “You told me that was the most unique first date you'd ever been on."

"Yeah, I actually remember saying that." The reminder of that day made you grin. "And it ended with us on a plane all the way across the country."

"Gotta treat my girl right," he replied with a wink and a kiss to your forehead.

A minute of banter passed before Jimmy flipped over the next card. "Oh, this one should be easy. First kiss."

"Like my first kiss? Or our first kiss?"

"The first time the two of you kissed."

Immediately you both wrote on your pads, and at the drum roll you flipped them around at the same time... to show different dates.

"Ah! Controversy! We have September in Vegas from Y/N and November in an elevator from Sebastian. One of you is wrong."

"Seb, we literally have pictures of us kissing in front of Elvis in Vegas."

"It doesn't count! Neither of us remember so it doesn't count!"

You weren’t about to give up the fight. "Hey, I don't remember marrying you, but legally it counts, so I think photographic evidence is proof enough that I'm right."

After a minute of debating, it was decided that you were right and the score was tied one to one.

Jimmy quieted everyone down and looked straight at the camera for the last question. "Here's the tiebreaker! Tell us... Which one of you said I Love You first?"

Another easy one. You wrote 'him' on your board, thinking back to the day after your surgery.

Yet Seb had a smirk on his face that didn't bode well for you.

"Three...Two...One!"

And Sebastian had written your name.

The crowd Oooh-ed and you tilted your head at Seb, confused and slightly concerned with his obviously shitty memory. "You said it first, babe. Like, for sure. One hundred percent."

He shook his head, smirk growing to a full blown smile, soft at the edges. "You don't remember, do you? I'd just gotten home for Thanksgiving break and you were drinking wine and dancing around the living room."

"I remember that. But I didn't say—"

"You begged me to drink and dance with you and when I said yes, you said..."

Mind blank, you slowly shook your head until the drunken memory came back. "I said, God, I love you and that we needed more wine. Oh my god, I said it first."

"You said it first." An entire month before he had, actually. He brought your hand up to brush a kiss along your knuckles, then his smile grew. "And that means I win this game."

Later that night, you were sat between Seb's legs on the couch, twisting his wedding band on his finger as some sitcom played on the screen in front of you.

"You know, I've never said I Love You first. I don't think I've really said it to anyone but Jaz, actually."

His right arm tightened around your waist and he nuzzled his nose into your neck. "I figured. I also figured that you wouldn't say it while you were sober for a while. But I knew you meant it."

Your mind drifted back to those first few months together, to everything Sebastian did for you and said to you. "You loved me too, then. Didn't you?"

"I'd loved you for a while before Thanksgiving, but I knew you weren't ready to hear me say it."

You hummed in response to his confession and tangled your fingers with his.

"In case you were wondering why it seemed so easy for me to stay with you when you kept trying to push me away after the fight before your surgery and all the fights during your recovery," he whispered, "That's why. I knew you loved me. I knew I loved you. And I knew that unconditional love wasn't something you were used to. You didn't understand it and so you had to protect yourself against it until you did understand it."

"I've always kinda hated how you were so quick to figure out what makes me tick. And I especially hated how you seem to know exactly how to handle my quirks."

"I don't know about that," he murmured against your hair. "The first few fights we had were definitely my fault."

"Mmm, okay. I'll let you take the blame for those."

He squeezed your fingers and pressed his lips to your temple before changing the subject. "Thanks for doing the show with me tonight."

"It wasn't as bad as I thought it'd be. I hope your agent is satisfied with it. And I hope your fans like it." A thought crossed your mind and you sat up enough to twist around and look him straight in the eye. "If you ever go on Kelly Clarkson's show, you better take me with you. Otherwise, I'll file for divorce I swear."

He laughed softly and nodded. "I was already planning on it, sweetheart. Don't you worry."

"Good." With a satisfied smile, you kissed him. "I love you, Mr. Stan."

"I love you too, Mrs. Stan."

THE END

[nose-bandaid]

bloom ✿ (epilogue) — and so the daisies bloom

Kino (Hyunggu) x (female) Reader | flower shop AU

introduction | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | epilogue

this is long overdue, and i was missing hyunggu so i wrote this for you for this series shall pursue

ok on a more serious note this is long overdue and i’m so sorry for the wait. i hope you guys all enjoy and this will be the wrap of the bloom✿ series! thank you so much for sticking through and i love you all !! ~ tiny

taglist: @yunwoo​

=====

You made sure you had the day off from work on your first year anniversary with Hyunggu because the two of you had been planning a date since about three months ago, in preparation for your celebration. Or rather, it was Hyunggu who had everything planned out, as he refused to let you know a single bit of what you were about to do with him today.

No matter how much you begged him to give you at least a hint, he would always just give you a cheeky smile before changing the subject. Sometimes he poked your nose too. For fun.

So when you received a text in the morning, telling you dress according to the sunny weather forecasted for the day, your mind ran wild, thinking of all the possible scenarios that could happen.

Just where could he be taking you?

He didn’t arrive that much later, giving you enough time to make yourself some breakfast and get ready, and you joined him in the passenger seat of his car, excitedly shutting the door and facing him.

“So?”

He quirked an eyebrow, pretending to not know what you were hinting at. “So what?”

You pouted. “You know exactly what I’m talking about, sir.”

“You’ll just have to wait and see, sunshine~”

-----

The wind tickled your face as you stuck your head out the window a little bit for the nth time. It’s been almost an hour on the road and location still unknown to you. Honestly, you didn’t even recognize much of the area around you and had no idea where you were. When finally he turned into a quieter road in the forest, you opened your mouth.

“Are we there—”

“Yes, we’re here now.” He cut off your whining and you immediately sat up in your seat, taking a look at the view outside to guess where you guys were going. All around you though, was tree after tree with bare glimpses of a beach in the distance.

“Are you going to a beach?” You guessed.

“Oh... actually we’re not,” He replied sheepishly, eyes darting to read your expression. “But we can go there after our date if you want!”

“If we have some time left over then sure.” You hummed as you got out of the car. “But I believe that whatever you chose to do will be amazing.”

“Okay, then close your eyes.”

You cocked your head at that. “Close my eyes?”

He nodded and walked over so that he was behind you, hands gently beginning to cover your eyes. “Do you trust me?”

“Yes of course I do, but what’s happening?”

“I just want to make the suspense last for as long as possible, you’ll be able to open your eyes when we reach the destination.”

He guided you through a rocky path, occasionally pulling you from one side to another to avoid the hanging branches and uprooted trees. That didn’t stop you from stumbling over something every so often though. After a few minutes of walking you frowned, eyes still covered by Hyunggu’s hands.

“You’re not taking me anywhere sketchy are you?”

He stopped the two of you in your tracks. “I thought you said you trusted me.” He giggled, to which you exclaimed back an “I do!”. “But don’t worry we’re almost there, I promise.”

After a few more steps on some steep incline, his hands left your face, but you kept your eyes shut.

“Okay! You can open your eyes now.” From the tone of his voice, you could tell he was filled to the brim with excitement.

You eyes widened as you looked all around you. The trees that once surrounded you were far into the distance, and now you stood in a field of thousands of white daisies, covering the clearing you were standing in.

It was stunning.

“You know that trip I went on with my friends a few months ago?” Hyunggu spoke up after giving you a while to take in the scene.

You nodded as he guided you to a spot to plop yourselves down on.

“Well we stopped by the beach you saw earlier, and then wanted to explore the forest for fun. Long story short, we got lost for a few hours — because of a certain someone — but we came upon this flower field! And the moment I saw it I knew I had to take you here. I’ve been waiting for this day for so long you don’t understand.” Partway through his gushing, he had grabbed your hands warmly into his own and he pulled you into his embrace.

“And now that we’re here, I can say I love you, y/n.” He muttered softly into your shoulder. “And thank you for showing me those daisies on that day, even though we met through... some unfortunate circumstances.” He chuckled. “And thank you for still giving me a chance when things kind of went downhill.”

You swatted the hand that dangled in front of you, blushing. “Geez you’re such as sap.” 

"I’m your sap though.” He added, quirking his eyebrows, and you rolled your eyes.

“That doesn’t make you sound any better.” You wriggled your way out of his grasp to pluck one the the nearby daisies. Then, you turned yourself around to tuck it above his ear and placed a gentle kiss on his lips, to which he happily reciprocated. “But yes, you are my sap and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

The two of you shared a warm silence, taking in each other’s presence until something clicked in your mind.

“Oh!” You perked up and rummaged in the bag you brought with you when you suddenly remembered what was in it.

“Hm?” Hyunggu leaned in when you presented him a small journal and rested it on your lap.

“I brought a little something for you.” You flipped through the pages quickly to show him that they were filled of pictures of you and him together, and then you landed on the page with the picture of a daisy keychain.

Specifically Hyunggu’s keychain, hanging on the corkboard behind the register, in all of its slightly soiled glory.

“My keychain... you took a picture of that?”

“Listen, I thought it was really cute and wanted to get myself one.” You quickly defended before flipping a few pages and landing a page with a dried lilac acting as a bookmark for one of your favourite pictures you took together over the summer.

“A lilac?” He questioned, gingerly picking up the fragile remnants of the flower to inspect it.

“It’s from the lilac bouquet you bought from me for your dorm. You remember that time? One of them fell off and I just kept it as a memory of you.”

Hyunggu probably busted one of the biggest smiles ever at your words. “Aww y/n, you are so cute.”

He returned the small flower to you so that you could put it back in its former place. Then you flipped to the page that housed the rose he gave you on Valentine’s day. Much of its stem was cut off to allow it to fit on the space of the small page, but the flower itself was all there in its beautiful shade of red.

“The rose you gave me,” You explained. “I kept that for obvious reasons.” 

Hyunggu’s hand snuck its way into yours as you flipped the pages once again.

“This is the last one. I kept the extra lilies of the valley from the bouquet I was making on the day you asked me out.” You said softly, pulling out the dried flowers for him to hold. “I know this gift is my own share of cheesiness, but I wanted to give these memories to you so that it’s like we’re more connected you know?”

When you didn’t get a response, you looked up nervously to see him staring back at you with a loving gaze.

You stared back owlishly back at him.

“Hyunggu?”

He didn’t budge, and you waved a hand in front of his face, taking the flowers back from him as you did.

“Hyunggu...?” You tried again, and he blinked, coming back to his senses and laughed.

“Sorry, you’re just so beautiful I couldn’t help but stare~”

“Oh so you really are a sap today, huh” You playfully smacked his arm as he pulled you back into his embrace, falling into the flowers and pulling you down with him.

“Y/n, let’s come back here next year.” He suggested, in between the fit of giggles he let out when the daises tickled his face.

“Then I expect that we’ll also be here the year after that.” You added on with a smile, laying down next to him, when he finally calmed down.

“Sure,” He kissed you sweetly, once on the lips, and once on your forehead.

“And the year after that too?” You asked, and he smiled.

“I’d stay in this flower field forever if it’s going to be with you.”

[thatsaweirdwaytospellundead]

Senribana Monogatari 10/11

Summary: Due to Citron’s work as the Zahran Minister of Culture and Arts there has been a surge in interest in foreign culture in Zahra. Prince Tangerine gives his brother a call, but it seems he has more on his mind than just an invitation..

Note: This event references a popular Japanese fairytale titled “The Story of the Old Man Who Made Withered Trees to Blossom”, I encourage you to read it here!

This is a 10 part story with an epilogue.

[part 1] [part 2] [part 3] [part 4] [part 5] [part 6] [part 7] [part 8] [part 9] [part 10]

Epilogue “The Story of the Old Man Who Made Withered Trees to Blossom”

This is a chapter that features the title play of this event! You can read the full translation of the play with pictures here!

This chapter is very long! It references two actual Kabuki plays, “Five Men of the White Waves” and “Wait a Minute”.

Characters

Citron as Sahul (Yukimaru)

Azuma as Yukinojou

Itaru as Matsunosuke

Hisoka as Fukumaru

Homare as Fujisaka

Sakuya as Ogino

Yukinojou  

“And somehow or other, more than when it began, I find myself wondering through this endless purgatory. My wish of dragging Confucianism and Buddhism to hell have only withered away.”

Sahul  

Ohh..

Izumi  

(Just as I thought when we were assigning roles, Azuma’s stage presence is incredible. Everyone’s eyes are focused on him.

Sahul sees this performance and is immediately captivated by Yukinojou’s stage presence. After the show he goes to Yukinojou’s dressing room and begs to be his student..)

Sahul  

Please, take me as your student!

Yukinojou  

What?

Matsunosuke  

What’s the meaning of this? Hey you, it says ‘No unauthorised personnel allowed’.

Yukinojou  

It’s alright. I want to hear what he has to say.

Matsunosuke  

Are you sure?

Yukinojou  

He did come all the way here. I don’t think he is here to be rude, right? Are you serious about wanting to become my student?

Sahul  

Yes! Please! I am willing to do anything, even the work of just a servant! Please, I ask that you take me as your student!

Yukinojou  

I am not so sure..

Matsunosuke  

I’m going to call security.

Yukinojou  

No, not yet. Alright, I’ll give you a chance, boy.

Sahul  

SERIOUSLY!?

Matsunosuke  

Are you for real? I thought you never took on students?

Yukinojou  

It wouldn’t hurt to try taking just one student. I think it’s fine.

Sahul  

I’ll try my very best!

Yukinojou  

Alright, I will speak with Mr. Yamashita about your housing arrangements. 

Sahul  

Thank you!

Yukinojou  

Do you have any further questions for me?

Sahul  

Well.. When exactly do I start?

Yukinojou  

Well well, now let’s not get ahead of ourselves. How about we first get you acquainted to our customs before we do anything else.

Sahul  

Of course! I leave myself in your care!

Yukinojou  

Hmm, so first we need to give you a name. Typically a name is derived from one of the characters of the teacher’s name… So how about we take the “Yuki (snow)” from my name and give you the name “Yukimaru”?

Sahul  

Yukimaru.. Thank you so much!

Matsunosuke  

So then, what did you really think about that kid?

Yukinojou  

If you’re trying to give me advice I am not here for it.

Matsunosuke  

Have you not heard what the elders are saying?

He may dream of becoming a Kabuki actor but for real, taking a foreigner under your wing so suddenly? He’s already turning heads.

Yukinojou  

He’s got a lot of spunk. I believe he has done his homework.

Matsunosuke  

I just don’t want you wasting your time with this kid with a whole future ahead of him who just happens to have some flashy clothes and elegant demeanor.

Yukinojou  

.. I understand where you’re coming from.

Yukinojou  

This flower is very pretty.

Yamashita  

It was made by your very own Yukimaru.

Yukinojou  

!? Yukimaru made it?

Yamashita  

And he even cleaned up nicely.

He has been doing a very good job.

Yukinojou  

I see..

Sahul  

Master, I’m home!

Yukinojou  

Tell me, have you been adjusting well to our culture?

Sahul  

Yes, and it is all thanks to your guidance.

Since the very beginning I have yearned to live in this country, how could I not but enjoy myself?

From the first time I saw Kabuki on TV, I have yearned to study this beautiful art form no matter it would take me or how I would learn it. I just knew it was what I wanted. Being able to see this world I have only imagined has only broadened my horizons as if I was living in a dream.

Yukinojou  

So, I guess you really are..

Sahul  

Master?

Yukinojou  

.. Ready to begin training soon.

Sahul  

SERIOUSLY!? THANK YOU SO MUCH!

Fujisaka  

Hmm, what wonderful form. Alrighty, how about you show me what you know.

Sahul  

Okay!

Fujisaka  

W-Where did you learn to do Japanese Buyo!?

Sahul  

I happened to find a teacher some years ago.. About 10 years ago.

Fujisaka  

That’s great.You have more passion than I imagined.

Sahul  

Thank you very much.

Izumi  

(It’s just like Citron said before, Japanese Buyo really comes naturally to him.

The role of Fujisaka also really brings out Homare’s elegant side. The traits of both Fujisaka and Homare are a great match, it’s perfect.

After Buyo, Sahul goes to learn Nagauta, it’s a type of long story told as the performer plays the shamisen.)

Sahul  

Thank you very much.

Ogino  

.. I’m going to head out first.

Sahul  

W-Wait..

Ogino  

?

Sahul  

My playing wasn’t weird, was it? If there’s anything you notice I would like to know—

Ogino  

Well there’s nothing in particular.

Sahul  

Really!? Thank you! See you next week!

Ogino  

Yeah, okay.

Fujisaka  

And haven’t you heard his incredible Nagauta performance?

Yukinojou  

Wait who?

Fujisaka  

Yukimaru of course!

Yukinojou  

Oh, yes..

Fujisaka  

That boy’s a born genius!

He’s the cream of the crop, I have never seen anyone like him! If only there was somewhere he could go to use his talents. I have no doubts his talents will flourish wherever he goes. It’s such a shame. Becoming a Kabuki actor would truly be difficult for someone like him. Not only is he foreign, but he has no titles nor any powerful sponsors to back him. Oh and not to mention he is starting awfully late.

Yukinojou  

......

Fujisaka  

Well anyway, I am sure you have been thinking about his future since you’re his teacher after all.

Yukinojou

.... Yes, of course.

Fujisaka  

However I find him to be a very interesting pick for someone like you, the son of a commoner.

Matsunosuke  

Hey—

Yukinojou  

Oh, it’s rare to see you here.

Matsunosuke  

Well you know I had to come greet my partner before the performance.

Yukinojou  

You say that but this is the first time you have ever done it.

Matsunosuke 

Soooo is that kid here today?

Yukinojou  

He is at dance practice right now.

Matsunosuke  

Hmm, practice huh. Just how long do you plan to keep that kid around for anyway?

Yukinojou  

Well..

Sahul  

I’m baaccckkk, yooo!

Oh, are you a visitor?

Matsunosuke  

Oh, you’re looking better than I expected. 

Sahul  

W-Welcome!

Matsunosuke  

.. Hmmm.

Sahul  

Umm?

Who was that man?

Yukinojou  

Yanase Matsunosuke.

He is the noble son of the Yanase family.

And loved by the God of Kabuki.

Sahul  

Oh, is that so?

Well I for one think the God of Kabuki is also looking down upon you, great master.

Yukinojou  

Well actually— I did not exactly have the easiest time getting into this industry myself.

Izumi  

(The contrast between Sahul’s carefree nature and Yukinojou’s deep skepticism is so captivating.

Itaru’s performance as Matsunosuke is also really nice. He really captures the confidence of a man of noble birth.)

Fukumaru  

HAH!

Sahul  

Wow.. So that’s how you do somersault..

Actor A  

So you are Yukinojou’s student.. ?

Sahul  

Nice to meet you!

Actor A  

Well to get you started you first need to master the basic starting position and then—

Fukumaru  

I heard you studied Nagauta and dance in your home country so I am sure you can do a simple somersault, right?

Actor A  

Hmm yeah, I heard you are pretty strong, right?

Sahul  

Well umm.. I.. I have never done a somersault before and umm..

Fukumaru  

Come on, give it a try! Why don’t you give it a shot, you are a student after all. I am sure you have enough guts to at least give it a shot, right?

Sahul  

Alright, I’ll try.

Actor A  

WATCH OUT

Fukumaru  

Hmm.. Being brave and being reckless are two different things you know.!

Sahul  

O-Oww..

B-But!

Fukumaru  

What is it?

Sahul  

Please teach me how to somersault! I was moved by the beauty of your somersault you did earlier! 

Fukumaru  

You want me to teach.. — You know it’s not something that you can simply learn overnight.

Sahul  

I am sorry for asking..

Fukumaru  

You know I don’t see any real potential in you. And not to rain on your parade, but I’m not the only one either, Yukinojou’s master also, well..

Sahul  

Huh!?

Fukumaru  

Hurry and just give up now and go back to your country.

Izumi

(Hisoka is amazing at those somersaults. I can tell that even though the audience may not understand the words he is saying, he does an excellent job showing off his skill.)

Actor A  

I think it’s time we start heading back.

Sahul  

Thank you so much for helping me!

Actor B  

Don’t overdo it.

Sahul  

Okay!

HAH!

UWAAHH!

O-Oww oww..

This sure is hard..

Fukumaru  

Are you stupid?

Do you really think if just recklessly try it over and over you’ll do it?

Sahul  

Is that not it?

Fukumaru  

I’ll help you out so try again.

Sahul  

Are you sure?

Fukumaru  

You gotta learn those three disciplines by the end of today after all.

Sahul  

OKAY!

Fukumaru  

You gotta be more aggressive.

Sahul  

OKAY!

I’m gonna try!

HAH!

— I-I did it..

I DID IT!

Thank you so much!

Fukumaru  

You’re really dumb.

.. But, maybe you do have what it takes.

Izumi  

(He kept practicing over and over without being able to even do a single somersault..

This is the true sign of Citron’s perseverance, he really worked hard against all odds.

Sahul throws himself completely into the world of Kabuki and his hardwork shows through his training, just like how Citron devoted all his attention to developing his character.)

Izumi  

(As Sahul is training and growing, Yukinojou makes plans for his first performance..)

Sahul  

Good morning!

Matsunosuke  

Hey Yukimaru, assistants need to wait over there.

Sahul  

B-But I am Yukinojou’s student—

Matsunosuke  

Do you really think it’s worth it to put so much effort into practicing even though you’ll never stand on stage? If you’re just doing this for a hobby you can leave.

Sahul  

..... 

Yukinojou  

That’s enough.

Matsunosuke  

I am only being honest. Yukimaru will never become a Kabuki actor no matter how hard he works.

Guys like him are a dime a dozen. They can train as hard as they want and long for the stage, but the result is all the same.

This kid has no titles, no wealthy sponsor, is completely inexperienced, and on top of all that, he’s foreign. Did you really think you would get any support from the elders or your fans?

Yukinojou, this is what I have been trying to tell you from the beginning.

Sahul  

Umm.. I.. Please excuse me, I’ll just go wait over there.

Yukinojou  

Yukimaru..

Nagauta Teacher  

You seem a bit distracted today. How about we end the lesson here?

Sahul  

My apologies..

Ogino  

Good job.

Sahul  

Yeah, good job.

Ogino  

.. Umm, can I ask, is there something wrong?

Sahul  

Ogino, why did you choose to learn the shamisen?

Ogino  

Huh? Me? Umm.. Well, I have always loved it since I was a child.

Sahul  

You loved the sound..

Ogino  

I guess, what are you trying to get at?

Sahul  

Nothing, thank you so much! I’ll see you next time!

Ogino  

I don’t know what I did but.. I’m glad you seem happier.

Izumi  

(Without hesitation, Ogino tells Sahul why he loves the shamisen. This puts Sahul’s heart at ease.. This was a perfect choice for Sakuya.)

Sahul  

Umm, could I have a word?

Matsunosuke  

Hmm?

Sahul  

Even if I can’t stand on the stage now.. I will continue to work hard until the day I can make my dream a reality.

I do not think my hard work is all for nothing. I really love Kabuki.

Matsunosuke  

Hmm.. Okay fine, do whatever you want.

Yukinojou  

Yukimaru is pretty amazing. I am sure he could teach me a thing or two.

Matsunosuke  

I have noticed your demeanor has changed, you seem more like a teacher now.

Hey, Yukimaru, why don’t you try being my stage hand.

Sahul  

What!? For real!?

Yukinojou  

Yes, I think this is great timing.

Matsunosuke  

You won’t stand out if you’re dressed in all black.

Sahul  

I’ll do my best!

Izumi  

(And now the day of Sahul’s debut performance has arrived..)

Sahul  

(I gotta move the katana over here..)

Ack!

Damn, I dropped it..!)

Yukinojou  

Come come, take this..

Sahul  

(Oh, saved by my master..)

Matsunosuke  

If you’re gonna be clumsy like that on stage there’s no point in trying a second time.

Sahul  

My deepest apologies..

Yukinojou  

Please don’t get discouraged.

Sahul  

.....

Matsunosuke  

Fine. I’ll give you one chance. I’ll give you a shot at playing Benten Kozo from “Five Men of the White Waves”. If you look good, you’ll get my approval. If you don’t, then you’re better off finding a different career path.

Yukinojou  

This has nothing to do with what we were talking about earlier. I don’t think giving him a test has any relation to his mistake he made tonight.

Matsunosuke  

But you told me to give him a chance. This is a make or break situation, it’s all up to Yukimaru.

Sahul

.. I’ll try. Please give me a chance!

Ogino  

They’re really letting you play Benten Kozo this time?

Sahul  

Eh, how did you know?

Ogino  

Matsunosuke has been telling everyone, word has really gotten around quick.

Sahul 

O-oh, is that so?

Ogino  

If you need some help with the shamisen, I got you.

Sahul  

Thank you so much.

Ogino  

Good luck!

Fujisaka  

So you’re really going to play Benten?

Sahul  

Umm, yes. This is kinda like a test for me.

Fujisaka  

Well then seems like you role study will be the same as anyone else’s. I gotta make sure I give you my best guidance. 

Yukinojou  

It seems like everyone is more excited for Yukimaru’s performance than the man himself.

Sahul  

It’s just I feel as if this is some sort of punishment for my mistake, I’m so sorry.

Yukinojou  

You are an honest boy, Yukimaru. I have no doubts that your emotions will resonate amongst the audience.

Sahul  

But.. I really don’t think I am good enough yet..

Yukinojou  

I said what I said. In fact, you could say I was the one learning from you.

When I look at you, I see a boy who wholeheartedly loves Kabuki. I see a boy that reminds me of myself when I first entered this industry. Because I love Kabuki.. That is the most important reason of all for me to be here.

I have forgotten all of the mean comments and whispers amongst my peers. The only thing that mattered was that I love Kabuki and that is what brought me here.

Sahul  

I could see your love for this art through your acting and dancing. That is why I had asked you to be my teacher.

Yukinojou  

Is that so.. Thank you so much, thank you, Yukimaru. Thank you for being my student.

Izumi  

(Yukinojou gives Sahul a soft smile to show his gratitude when he realises his feelings had reached Sahul. Wow, that expression is very Azuma-like.

Their performance seems like it is really resonating with the rest of the crowd, I can see Yukinojou and Sahul are both equally moved. Citron has quite a way with communication even without words.

I feel like the audience can really sympathise with Sahul.)

Sahul  

If ya don’t know, I’ll tell ya. Just as Goemon’s death poem says, there are as many thieves in this world as there are grains of sand on Shichirigahama beach. 

I am one of those thieves who once worked as a page boy on Enoshima Island.I began stealing gifts from temples in Edo.

Soon the money I stole began to pile up more and more.

It is me, the one and only Benten Kozo Kikunosuke.

Matsunosuke  

Wow, so you really did make it to the end. You passed.

Sahul  

Thank you so much!

Matsunosuke  

Next time make sure not to make any mistakes.

Sahul  

Yes! Thank you!

Matsunosuke  

The reception will be the last judge. I wonder if this will be enough to warm up the elders to the idea of Yukimaru in Kabuki.

Yukinojou  

Taking Sahul as my student was already against the norms of the Kabuki industry.

However I also think I have much to learn, just like him. For Yukimaru’s sake, I will also work hard to rise to the top.

Matsunosuke  

I see you have been preparing yourself as well.

Izumi  

(Sahul masters the role of Benten Kozo. I can see the result of Citron’s hard work in the scene where Sahul gains recognition for his performance.)

Izumi 

(And now we jump to a couple years later..)

Yukinojou  

And how about for our play ‘Wait a Moment’?

Yukinojou’s Teacher  

It has gained a lot of recognition overseas. It is surprising to see you making such rapid progress. You are even getting offers from sponsors. I think this is a good time to take them up on those deals.

Yukinojou  

First.. May I make a selfish request?

Yukinojou’s Teacher  

Sure.

Yukinojou  

Will you give Yukimaru a part?

Yukinojou’s Teacher  

Hey hey now, let’s not go that far..

Yukinojou  

He has already received the approval from other teachers in both his acting and performance. I am sure he would make quite the stir if we are taking our performance overseas.

After all, everyone has said he is the best of the best. Even you can agree to that, right?

However if I remember the much decorated and beloved Uzaemon from the Meiji era was also said to have foreign blood running through his veins.

I am who I am today because of Yukimaru. Yukimaru has the power to capture the hearts of many with his performance. So I beg of you, please.

Yukinojou’s Teacher  

Hmm hmm.. I need to ask about this one, I won’t make any promises.

Sahul  

Master, are you really going to perform overseas!? Congratulations!

Yukinojou  

Oh, Yukimaru, you are also going to be performing with me.

Sahul  

HUH!?

Yukinojou  

You will be standing on the same stage as me.

Sahul  

ARE YOU SERIOUS!?

Izumi  

(And now is the time for Sahul to finally stand on stage in his home country.)

Sahul  

I have come to the Imperial Court to return this treasure that I have stolen.

Matsunosuke 

A thief can only atone for their crimes with their life. Servants, tonight this man’s execution will serve as our entertainment.

Subordinate  

Hah, yes understood.

Yukinojou  

Wait just a minute!

Izumi

(Citron really captures Sahul’s character in this performance. Both him and Sahul are finally standing on stage in their home country, performing for their people.

I am sure everyone else can feel the same energy.)

Citron  

<< Thank you so much! >>

Azuma  

<< Thank you so much! >>

Itaru  

<< Thank you. >>

Homare 

<< THANK YOU! THANK YOU! >>

Sakuya  

<< Thank you so much! >>

Hisoka  

<< Thank you. >>

Audience A  

<< CITRON! >>

Audience B  

<< CITRON! >>

Izumi  

(Wow, everyone is cheering for Citron.

It seems like the audience could see Citron’s hard work and effort he put into his part. The atmosphere feels warm and welcoming. >>

Navel  

<< Amazing.. >>

Orange  

<< .. Our older brother isn’t a bad guy after all. I don’t feel any malice toward him either.)

Tangerine  

<< Dear brother, good job on your performance! It was really amazing! >>

Mika  

<< I have never seen anything so amazing! >>

Citron  

<< You praise too much. >>

Tangerine  

<< But of course, I am sure I am not the only one who thought your performance was great. >>

Citron  

Huh?

Orange 

....

Citron  

Orange, Navel..

Orange  

<< I have decided to study abroad. >>

Citron  

<< What? >>

Orange  

<< I plan to speak with the king after this.

Perhaps our request to study abroad may seem like we are running away, but it is really the opposite. We are still lacking in experience. We have only ever known this palace.

After watching your performance we were able to understand this.

We would like to see many more things just like you, dear brother.

We want to meet new people and understand different cultures.. Your performance was so amazing it inspired us to want to set out on our own journey abroad. >>

Navel  

<< M-Me too. I want to see sakura blossoms in real life one day. >>

Citron  

<< .. I understand. I am very happy to hear that as the Minister of Foreign Arts and Culture. >>

Guy  

They are having a serious conversation.

Azuma 

Fufu. It’s good.

Izumi 

I am sure things will slowly begin to change from now on.

Chikage  

Oh come to think of it, shouldn’t we tell our troupe mates back in Japan how the play went?

Izumi  

Oh, yes!

(”The play finished up without a problem”..)

.. And what about a picture?

[LIME] Kazunari  

Good work! Oh, the sakura are gonna bloom soon!

Izumi  

When we return it will be just about spring time.

Homare  

The spring that melts the snow.. Seems like coming to Zahra put us one step ahead.

Azuma  

So it has.

Citron  

<< About studying abroad. How about I put in a word for you with the king as well? If you have any questions or concerns you may always ask me. >>

Orange  

<< Thank you. We will. >>

Tangerine  

<< And if there is anything I can do to help you can ask me. I will support your decision. >>

END STORY

Read the epilogue here!

[omgjasminesimone]

Juvenile Delinquents Epilogue

Logan x MC

Word Count: ~2400

For MC day of @rodappreciationweek, an MC focused epilogue to my story Juvenile Delinquents, where Logan and Ellie give their daughter up for adoption.

Ellie’s half hearted watching of a documentary is interrupted by her ringing phone. Ellie glances at the phone as it vibrates on her coffee table. She doesn’t recognize the number, but it’s an LA area code.

She hesitantly picks up. “Hello?”

“Ellie Wheeler?” The caller asks.

“...who is this?” Ellie counters. She doesn’t use that name anymore. Not since an ex at Langston who’d she’d confided in hacked her juvenile criminal record and publically released it after their messy break up.

“Oh, right. What did the investigator say... Elle Gordon was it now?” The caller continues.

Ellie frowns, turning off the tv. “Again, who is this?”

“Oh I’m sorry. I’m going about this all wrong. It’s Chet, Chet Johnson?” He says, as if she might have forgotten. As if choosing him and his husband to raise her and Logan’s daughter might have slipped her mind.

Ellie thinks about her daughter every day. Little things will stir up her memories, like seeing a yellow car (she’s pretty sure they conceived their daughter in Logan’s beloved car), or hearing a baby cry. Ellie tries not to dwell in the memories, because it’s just too painful.

“Chet. Wow. It’s been a while.” 5 years, to be exact. Ellie furrows her brow. “Is something wrong?” Maybe her daughter needs a kidney or something? She can’t imagine why else he’d be calling.

“No, no.” Chet is quick to reassure. “Nothing is wrong. It’s something good, actually. At least, I think it’s something good. Dahlia, we explained adoption to her, and she wants to meet her birth parents.”

Tears immediately well in Ellie’s eyes. “Dahlia, that’s pretty.” Ellie says softly. She and Logan never picked out a name, knowing they weren’t going to get to keep their baby.

“She’s amazing. She’s made us so happy. We’re so grateful to you. And to Logan. You gave us such a gift.” Chet gets a little choked up, clearing his throat at the end.

“I’d...I’d love to meet her. If that’s something you and Frank are comfortable with.”

“We’re very comfortable! We weren’t sure what your thoughts on this were going to be, we considered it might be too painful, that maybe you wanted a clean break. That’s why we didn’t reach out after the birth.”

“I think back then, it might have been too much, the loss still too fresh. But now, I think I can handle it. I’d really like to meet her.” Ellie reassures.

“That’s good to hear. Especially after all the effort that went into tracking you down! You and Logan are both difficult people to reach.” Chet replies.

Ellie swallows. “...you talked to Logan?”

“I did. He wants to meet Dahlia too. Frank and I were thinking we could all meet up at the park.”

Ellie doesn’t say anything to that, so Chet continues.

“...that’s not a problem, is it? Did something happen between you two?” He questions.

Ellie hasn’t spoken to Logan in almost 4 years. There was no big dramatic break up, their relationship just seemed to slowly fizzle out with them living on opposite sides of the country. She’d been busy with school, and he’d been busy with work, and they’d slowly run out of things to talk about over the phone. They never talked about their daughter, that topic too painful to broach just to have something meaningful to say to one another.

Ellie shakes herself out of her reverie. “No, that’s absolutely fine. Makes sense to do both the introductions at once.” She assures.

“Great! I’ll text you the details once we have all the logistics worked out.”

...

They schedule their meet up for a month later. Ellie flies home to LA from Dallas, where she’s working in her first post graduation position. The whole flight, she’s too anxious to eat anything. What if Dahlia doesn’t like her? What if they just sit there in awkward silence? Ellie doesn’t have a lot of experience with small children.

Despite her apprehension, Ellie is excited. She’s always wondered what Dahlia would be like, what she looks like now, if she’d be able to spot any of Logan’s mannerisms in their daughter.

If she’s being honest with herself, some of her apprehension might have to do with being reunited with her first love. Things just feel...unfinished between them. She almost wishes they’d had some big fight, just so she had some closure. But he just slowly...stopped calling. And she didn’t call him either. And then she just assumed they were done, and started dating someone else, all without ever speaking to Logan about it.

She doesn’t sleep much the night before the big reunion. Ellie is staying with her dad, who didn’t help her anxiety when he revealed he thought meeting Dahlia might be too much for her, so her stomach is in knots when she arrives at the park 30 minutes before the scheduled meeting time.

Ellie parks her dad’s car and makes her way over to an unoccupied bench. She takes deep breaths to try to calm herself down.

But then, Ellie feels like she stops breathing completely when spots a familiar yellow Devore pulling into the parking lot.

He steps out of the car. He’s just as beautiful as he was 5 years ago when she left him at that train station.

His hair is cut shorter, but it’s still long. He’s wearing the sparkplug necklace, like always. He spots her, freezing for a moment, before offering her a somewhat hesitant smile and making his way over.

She stands up as he approaches. They stand in front of each other awkwardly for a moment, before Ellie reaches out for a hug.

Logan squeezes her tight, resting his head on top of her’s and subtly breathing in her familiar coconut shampoo. “Eleanor Wheeler, it’s been a minute.” He greets.

It’s several long moments before Ellie pulls away, looking up at him. She doesn’t bother to correct him on her name change. “Logan, it’s good to see you.”

The former lovers sit down on the bench, engulfed in an uncomfortable silence reminiscent of their last few phone calls.

But this time, Logan actually broaches that subject he always avoided so as not to upset her. “Are you as nervous as I am about meeting Dahlia?”

Ellie smiles, nodding. “I feel like I have butterflies in my stomach.” She admits.

“Yeah, it’s kind of crazy. I’ve dreamed about this moment for so long, and now it’s actually happening.” Logan continues.

“Do you...think she’ll want to know why we didn’t keep her?” Ellie questions.

Logan leans back, looking thoughtful. “...no. She’s only five. I think by the time she’s old enough to wonder, she’ll already know the reason. We just weren’t in a position to give her what she deserves.”

Ellie nods. “We were too young. We did what was right for her. I know that. And yet, when I was at Langston, I still sometimes wondered if it was worth it.”

Logan furrows his brow. “What do you mean?”

“I wanted what was best for her, but I also wanted what was best for me. I’d put so much work into Langston, I thought it was the end all be all, and I knew I couldn’t do it with a baby. But then, when I got there, college wasn’t really the amazing experience I thought it was going to be. It didn’t seem.....worth not having her.” Ellie admits.

Logan sighs, running a hand through his hair. Ellie can’t help but quirk a small smile that he still has that familiar nervous tell. “Ellie....” he trails off, seemingly not knowing what to say to that.

“Well, how was it for you? Not having your daughter?” Ellie asks.

Logan lets out a humorless laugh, gazing down at the sidewalk. “I...I didn’t deserve to have her. I still don’t Ellie. I never left the gang, I never went back to school, or did any of the things I promised you I would if you let us keep the baby. I’m just a fuck up you were smart to get away from.”

“Don’t talk about yourself like that Logan.” Ellie pleads, wrapping her arms around him in a comforting loose hug. “You can still do all those things.” She assures him. “And I know you would have, if you’d had your daughter to motivate you.”

Logan returns her hug, burying his face into her hair. Ellie feels tears welling in her eyes. She didn’t realize how much she’d missed being in his arms.

She feels Logan expel a little breath, and then he murmurs. “They’re here.”

Ellie pulls herself away from his chest, looking to the parking lot where Chet and Frank are getting Dahlia out of her car seat.

The little girl takes both of her dads’ hands as they make their way over, all smiling merrily.

Ellie and Logan both rush to their feet, meeting the family halfway.

Chet smiles and hugs both of them, Frank following suit. Chet then crouches to Dahlia’s level. “Baby, these are your birth parents, Ellie and Logan.”

Dahlia grins up at them. “I grew in your belly!” She announces giddily to Ellie.

Ellie laughs, dropping to a crouch so they can be at eye level. “You did. You had quite the kick!”

Dahlia’s grin widens, and then she turns her attention to Logan. “I like your hair! It’s the same color as mine!” She compliments.

Logan crouches too, offering Dahlia a shy smile. “I think you got my eyes too, but that’s definitely Ellie’s nose.” He playfully bops their daughter’s nose, and Dahlia giggles.

Ellie sees some of Logan in Dahlia’s facial features, but their little girl definitely resembles Ellie more. It’s like looking in a time warped mirror.

The five of them take a seat at a picnic table and make small talk. Ellie can barely pay attention to anyone besides Dahlia though. Genetics are so crazy. Dahlia wrinkles her nose like Ellie does when she seemingly disagrees with something that was said. And her smile starts in the corner and then grows, just like Logan’s.

Eventually, Dahlia grasps Ellie’s hand and drags her over to the swings. “Will you push me Ellie?” The little girls asks sweetly, and Ellie is quick to do as requested.

“Logan! Logan look!” Dahlia calls as she pumps her little legs. Dahlia has warmed to them so quickly. She’s clearly a very friendly and happy little girl. Ellie feels a little silly for spending so many hours fretting over Dahlia not liking her.

Logan makes his way over, taking over pushing duty.

“Daddies, look! Look!” Dahlia calls out when with Logan’s assistance, she gets higher than ever before.

“Alright Logan, put a little less power behind those pushes please!” Frank calls a little worriedly.

“Oops, my bad!” Logan calls back, gripping the chains to stop Dahlia’s momentum.

Dahlia pouts as she looks up at him. “But I like going high Logan.” She whines.

“No can do kiddo, you heard your dad.” Logan returns, pushing much softer this time.

Ellie smiles as she watches the two of them. It kind of hurts though. It’s so easy to envision a world where they could be mommy and daddy instead of Ellie and Logan.

Hours fly by, and before they know it the sun is setting and the park is getting ready to close.

Ellie and Dahlia walk back to Chet and Frank’s car hand in hand, the men all trailing slightly behind them chatting.

Ellie has to keep all her focus on not crying as she faces saying goodbye to her daughter, again.

“Sweetie, wasn’t there something you wanted to say to Logan and Ellie?” Frank prompts.

Dahlia nods enthusiastically, and motions for them to come close. They both crouch, and Dahlia wraps her arms around both their necks in a warm hug. “Thank you for my daddies!” She chimes sweetly.

“And thank you for Dahlia.” Chet starts choking up again, and Frank wraps an arm around him, placing a kiss to his husband’s cheek. “We really cannot express how grateful we are to the two of you.” Chet elaborates, fighting back tears.

Ellie kisses Dahlia’s chubby cheek before freeing herself from her daughter to wrap both Chet and Frank in a big hug. “Thank you for making her so happy and loving her so much.” She murmurs in their ears.

Logan stands, holding Dahlia with one arm and reaching out his free hand to shake hands with Chet, and then Frank. “You guys are amazing parents. You’ve done such a great job with her.”

Chet laughs, wiping at his eyes. “Well, you guys provided us  with some pretty great source material.”

Dahlia lets out a big yawn, all the hours of playing clearly wore her out. She reaches for Frank, and Logan passes her over to her dad. She rests her head on Frank’s shoulder, eyes blinking sleepily.

“Well, we should let you get out of here.” Ellie forces herself to say.

“Yeah, we need to start getting home. But this was really great. Would you guys be up for doing this again? Maybe on an annual basis?” Chet offers.

Both Ellie and Logan readily agree.

“Bye Ellie! Bye Logan! See you next year!” Dahlia chimes when she’s strapped into her car seat minutes later, waving at them merrily.

They wave back before Chet closes the door. Chet and Frank hug them both again, saying their goodbyes.

Ellie finally lets the tears fall as the car drives off. Instinctively, she looks to Logan for comfort, burying her face into his chest and crying into his shirt.

Logan wraps his arms around her as he lets her cry it out, gently rubbing her back. “We did the right thing Ellie.”

“I know. But it’s still hard.” She returns, but her tears are starting to subside, calmed by Logan’s gentle embrace.

Ellie eventually pulls herself together, hesitantly letting go of Logan. But she can’t bring herself to say goodbye to him just yet, even though her dad is expecting her home soon.

Luckily, it seems like Logan isn’t ready to say goodbye either. He cups her cheeks, wiping away the last few stubborn tears. “God, I missed you troublemaker.” He admits softly.

“I missed you too.” Ellie returns. And then, she gives into the urge she’s been feeling all day. She wraps her arms around his neck, and captures his lips. She can’t help but let out a happy sigh when his hands tangle into her hair as he kisses her back. For the first time since leaving LA 5 years ago, Ellie feels like she’s home.

...

..

taglist:  @choicesarehard​​​ @brightpinkpeppercorn​​​ @regina-and-happiness​​​ @drakexnadira @flyawayboo​​​ @fairydustandsarcasm​​​ @alesana45​​​ @maxwellsquidsuit​​​​ @god-save-the-keen​​​​ @mrsmckenziesworld @paisleylovergirl​​​​ @iplaydrake​​​​ @sinclaire-made-me-sin​​​​ @choicesgremlin​​​​ @lovehugsandcandy​​​​ @desireepow-1986​​​​ @blades-of-light-and-shadow​ @justdani14​​​​ @emceesynonymroll​​ @emichelle​​​​ @badchoicesposts​​​​ @client-327​​​​ @riverrune​​​​ @liamzigmichael4ever​​​​ @princessstellaris​​​​ @mskaneko​​​​ @anxious-arliah @zaffrenotes​​​​ @iam-ankita​​​​ @ohsnapitzlovehacker​​

[moscnios]

                                             SEE YOU AGAIN ━ﾞ

⁺◟   CHARACTERS . . .           guido mista           fem!reader

⁺◟   GENRE . . .           angst           oneshot

⁺◟   SYNOPSIS . . .           life is unfair and mista learns that           the hard way after the love of his           life is killed before his very eyes.

⁺◟   CONTENT WARNINGS . . .           graphic descriptions of death ‘ blood

⁺◟   WORD COUNT . . .           2.1k.

⁺◟   COMMENTARY . . .           i used his epilogue outfit because the           purple and blue is SUPERIOR !!! and           deserved more screentime. also i don’t           know what it is about these types of           oneshots like i literally have to hold           myself back from breaking my own           heart.

The sky was various shades of pink, purples, blues, and oranges. They all meshed well together, behind the setting sun and pure white clouds.

The tides from the beach came further than they had all day, the small children running from the water while screaming and cheering. Other children crying and throwing tantrums as since the sun was setting the beach was going to close soon. The smell of the sea had filled the nose of a lone tan-skinned man, setting close by the beach.

The man sat the closest table to the beach, looking out into the sea. Unlike he usually did, the man let his short black hair feel the breeze from the sea. His hat, which was different than the one he wore just a year ago, sat on the table just to the side of him.

His hat had a diagonal grid pattern to it with the front shaped like a purple downward arrow. He wore a turtle crop top sweater, similar to his hat both in color and design. On his legs, he wore tiger-striped leather pants where a short-barreled purple revolver sat in his side pocket. On his feet were dark boots that he bought recently.

Sitting in front of him sat two slices of strawberry cake. One slice sat in front of him while the other slice sat across from him on the other side of the table as if he was waiting for someone. In reality, he wasn’t waiting for anyone.

He had done it ever since last year. He would come to this very seaside restaurant, sit in this very table, and watch the slice across from him while he ate the one in front of him in silence. The staff at the restaurant at first worried for him, but now they had become accustomed to the man’s behavior.

A certain waitress even took it upon herself to plate the slices in two plates, a place a rose and candle in the middle of the table in hopes of making the man feel better, but it never worked.

A lone tear fell from his eye, down his cheek, as his head slowly fell below his head.

From inside his head, he could hear a woman’s voice.

“Giorno, protect Mista!”

Those three words had haunted him since the minute they left the mouth of the woman who had said them.

The love of his life.

( y/n ).

The woman who opened his eyes. Though their first meeting was not ideal, she had changed his life.

She had witnessed Mista kill three men in order to save a woman. When the first gunshot sounded, she immediately ran and hide behind a dumpster. She peered over the side of it, watching Mista shoot the three men with perfect accuracy. Her eyes fell onto the woman who was shaking and in bad condition and how she thanked Mista, meaning he helped her, he wasn’t the one hurting her.

But she also had witnessed him being captured by police. She was one of the few people who had believed in him and wanted him to be proven innocent.

Without a second thought, she had run to a familiar man, the same man who helped her off the street and gave her a home, Bruno Bucciarati and she informed him on the incident, pretty much begging him to help use Passione’s influence to help change Mista’s verdict and help him out of his sentence.

Her pleas did not fall upon deaf ears, Bucciarati had done just as she wished, swaying the verdict and giving Mista on a Stand fit for gunman like himself.

Sex Pistols.

Bucciarati had officially introduced the two one another and had informed Mista if it wasn’t for her, he wouldn’t have known about his incident and wouldn’t have been able to sway the verdict in his favor.

( y/n ), the first of Bucciarati’s recruits. She was one of his neighbors and had often gone fishing alongside him and his father when they were younger. His home was like a second home for her, because she hated being home.

After Bucciarati’s father had passed away, he joined Passione and she had followed him in suit, much to his dismay. She proved herself to be an amazing addition with a Stand with an innocent-looking appearance, but it was anything but that. She was the first to officially join his team, helping him recruit the others.

She is known to be very open and accepting, and Bucciarati’s right hand.

She was.

( y/n ) had passed away a year ago, alongside her teammates, Bucciarati, Abbacchio, and Narancia. Her death had devastated the team, rather what was left of the team, Mista included.

She was the person who Mista had bought the extra slice of cake for.

It was known to the entire team how the two felt for one another. It was obvious. No matter how hard they tried to hide it. The lingering glances, the blushing, the “subtle” flirting, the hand holding and small touches that Narancia would catch, their protectiveness of one another, the way she would play in his hair, their dates to the very restaurant he sat in a year later that they tried to disguise as patrol for Stand users. It was even obvious to Giorno, the newcomer.

Even if it was obvious, neither of them were bold enough to process their relationship publicly.

She was the light of his life and she was taken away from him just as fast as the speed of light.

She sacrificed herself as a decoy against Cioccolata, only thinking of the man she had loved with all of her heart and not about herself.

Weakened, as blood had poured out of the sides of his head, he could not run after her. And that’s when she said her last words.

“I love you, Guido Mista.”

He reached out for her. His eyes were wide as he stared at the sight in front of him. It was as if time had slowed itself, as the scene before him happened slow motion. He watched as the disembodied arm, cut deep into the neck of ( y/n ), slicing through.

Tears had formed in his eyes as he watched her stop struggling, her body just...standing for a brief moment to everyone else, but to him, it felt like an eternity. Her head fell off her shoulders, falling onto the ground, rolling toward him slightly.

Her hands trembled at the sight, his dark eyes looking into the now lifeless dull ( e/c ) ones of his partner. Her mouth was agape, allowing the blood left in her head to drain out. The rest of her body finally fell, blood gushing out of her now open neck.

The first yell for her had been from Number Five, tears flowing down the cheeks of the small entity as it cried out for her as if she could hear.

Mista opened his mouth to scream, to shout, to speak, to whisper, but nothing came out. Streams of tears decorated his cheeks as he crawled to ( y/n ), desperately in hopes that despite how bad the situation looked, she would be okay, she would wake up, this was just some sort of dream.

She wasn’t really gone. There was no way. She was too strong to go out like...this.

After Cioccolata was taken care of, Giorno rushed to heal Mista. The tanned man refused. He wanted to die. He couldn’t live in a world without her.

He didn’t want to live in a world without her.

He held her head close to him, finally finding his voice. He cried for her until he couldn’t cry anymore. He screamed for her till his voice went hoarse. Even then, he whispered until he couldn’t anymore until the words no longer came out and it was just tears. Even if all he wanted was for there to be a way for Giorno to bring her back, he knew that wasn’t possibly. If it was, the blonde would have already done it instead of just standing there and letting him mourn.

As he held her in his hands for one last time, the many memories ran through his head. Her smile, her laugh, just everything about her. One memory in particular that appeared over and over was one where she laid next to him on the beach in the sand, looking at the sunset as she confided in him her past and her hopes for the future.

“I don’t want this life anymore. I want out of Passione. I...I want a better life for myself. I want a job that I don’t have to hide anyone. I want one that I can proudly show off and say that I have. Something cool! Like a doctor or a nurse! Maybe even a firefighter or an engineer! Of course, I’ll have to go to university but I’ve been saving up so I think I have enough to go now. I’m just scared to tell Bucciarati, I just want him to be proud of me...but you’ll support me, right?”

“Of course I will. I’ll follow you every step of the day,” He told her.

But her dreams never came true. She never got to go off to university. She never got to hold her degree, not even step foot inside a university classroom. Her life was just truly beginning, but it was taken away from her in a split second.

When it was all over, ( y/n ) was buried next to Bucciarati on the hilltop of a cemetery, separated from the other deceased.

Mista could not attend her funeral. He couldn’t bring himself to watch them put the love of his life in the ground and cover her with dirt. He couldn’t do it without wanting to jump in after her.

On the day of her funeral, he spent at the seaside restaurant that she adored and where they had many dates away from the team. She had only chosen this place because they served the best strawberry cake and she knew that he loved the strawberry cake.

He listened to the waves crash onto the shore, daydreaming about what could have been. Daydreaming of what it would have been like to have been Diavolo and still have her sitting in front of him with that bright smile of hers. But that was never going to happen.

The first few months of her death, he blamed himself for her death. If he was stronger, there would have been no need for her to protect him and use herself as a decoy. The image of her last moments haunted him to this day. Having to see her decapitated was not an easy sight. Watching her face drop, watching her eyes come lifeless and lose their color.

With the help of Giorno, Mista slowly began to recover and returned to himself, a bit more mature than how he was before. Witnesses the deaths of his friends and his lover had contributed to him maturing.

Mista let out a small sigh, losing his appetite. He pulled out the revolver in his pocket, emptying the barrel, six small entities coming out, and jumping onto the slice of strawberry cake, eating away. All except for one, Number Five.

Number Five, known as the crybaby of the bunch, had simply floated in the air next to Mista, watching its user with sad eyes. The sea breeze blew past, sending shivers down the Stand’s small body. As it shivered, a translucent appeared out of the corner of its eye.

Now sitting across the table was a translucent figure of a familiar woman with a bruised neck, looking at the man across the table with eyes full of admiration and love. A gasp left the entity’s mouth.

Mista picked his head up, looking to Number Five, “What’s wrong?”

Number Five pointed across the table, “Y-You don’t see that?”

Mista followed the entity’s pointed figure, finding nothing at the end, “See what? There’s nothing there. You should probably eat, you’re imagining things. ( y/n ) always did say you had quite the imagination compared to the others.”

The translucent figure giggled.

“M-M-Mista―!”

“I wonder if she’s here right now watching me eat at her favorite place. If I had a second chance I’d yell it to the world how much I love her. I just wish she didn’t leave.”

Her hand caressed his cheek slightly, her touch nonexistent. While it hurt she could no longer touch him and have him feel her, she was happy to just be in his presence.

“I never left, Mista. One day...one day I’ll see you again. Hang on until then, okay?”

⁺◟   BACK TO NAVIGATION . . .

[gumnut-logic]

The Fight (Bit 18b + Epilogue)

Bit 1 | Bit 2 | Bit 3 | Bit 4 | Bit 5 | Bit 6 | Bit 7 | Bit 8 | Bit 9 | Bit 10 | Bit 11a | Bit 11b | Bit 12 | Bit 13 | Bit 14 | Bit 15 | Bit 16 | Bit 17a | Bit 17b | Bit 18a | 18b + Epilogue

It’s finished! All 18,380 words of it :D Writing every day before work and at lunch seems to work well :D Though I usually need a weekend to wind up the ending - needs more concentration :D

So many thanks to the wonderful @onereyofstarlight for all her help throughout this fic and for a final read through of this bit :D You is amazing and wonderful.

Also, so many thanks to everyone who has commented and liked and cheered me on. You guys keep me writing these crazy things. ::hugs you all so much::

From here, it is onto the Kermadec fic ahead of Fandomversary ::eyes the date:: Oh dear, I better write fast. It will be a miracle if I finish it before 17 July.

As for Anna....I don’t think this is the last we will see of her :D This is the second story in a new series, apparently. :D

-o-o-o-

“There were some concerns regarding the MacIntyres and their connections to organised crime.” Jack’s voice was matter of fact. “You are a witness and/or a victim of both incidents. The Tracys were concerned for your safety.”

She hadn’t noticed anybody following her. Of course, she had considered the possibilities. Thoughts like that had kept her awake at night. But her conversations with the police had been reassuring.

“The police said there wasn’t anything to worry about. That the MacIntyres were in custody.”

Scott’s voice was quiet. “We have traced a connection to a worldwide crime ring. John, in particular, is concerned.” He held out a mobile phone. “We would like you to have this.”

She reached out and took it from him. Latest Tracy phone, worth a couple of thousand dollars. Completely outside her price range.

She looked up. “Why?”

“It has a direct connection to Thunderbird Five and we will be able to track you.”

“You could follow me?”

Scott’s voice was quiet. “Yes.”

He left it as a simple fact.

“Why?”

“For your safety.”

“What could you do from space?”

“We have security in the vicinity and can respond immediately.”

“So, you are following me anyway.”

“Yes.”

She held his gaze.

“We protect those we care about and Alan cares about you. Virgil, in fact, threw a fit after you left the hospital. He demanded we provide security.” A snort. “If he had given me a chance to answer, I could have told him that I had already spoken to Kyrano.” He didn’t look away, his eyes as challenging as hers. “The threat is there. We want to negate it.”

She hadn’t seen any security following her. She hadn’t seen Kyrano since the incident. Not that she had been looking. The thought that there were people watching her, hiding behind buildings...

“You should have told me.” An indrawn breath. “I work in a school surrounded by children. If I am a danger to the kids...”

“You’re not.”

“How do you know that?”

“We’re monitoring the situation-“

She shot to her feet. “How can you possibly guarantee that nothing will happen?!” The thought of a MacIntyre with a gun in her classroom was absolutely terrifying. “I have a responsibility to my students. How could you let me return to work when you knew that was a possibility?”

Scott stood up, his hands out obviously in an attempt to placate her. “Anna, you are not a danger to your students. Kyrano has you under surveillance, you’re safe.”

“I’m safe? Like Alan was?” The words were out of her mouth before she could think and she regretted them immediately as the man in front of her paled.

“That hole in our security has been plugged. I’m sorry we were unable to prevent that incident.” His voice was still strong and determined, but there was an uncertainty, a guilt in his undertones. This was a man trying to do the right thing.

“An apology is not necessary. That was not your fault. The point I am trying to make is that International Rescue is not omniscient. If there is a threat, I should not be in this school. How could I face the parents of my students should something happen? How could you?”

She grabbed the paperwork on her desk and shuffled it into a pile, her mind going through all the things she would need to do to resign from her position. But then, where would she go? Where would she be safe? She found her handbag in her hands and stared at it a moment. Looking up, she found both men calmly staring at her.

“Anna, I’m sorry.” And there was the young man who had lost his father only a matter of months ago. The suit suddenly seemed too big for him, the blue in his eyes just that touch unsure.

The door to the classroom was pushed open, no knock, no hesitancy. Kyrano strode in as if on cue. Dressed in loose black pants, a grey polo shirt and runners, his hair tied back at the nape of his neck, he appeared insignificant, a dad at the school to pick up his kids.

Only the sharp green of his eyes betrayed that he was anything but.

“Ms Kent, you and your students are safe. You have my word.”

He spoke as if his word was a certainty.

Anna sat down, thoughts swirling around her head, her whole body wilting. “How can I risk it? With so much at stake?” Her career, her life, was not worth those that filled this room, this building, on a daily basis.

And her family...De, her partner, hell, even the dogs. Her flatmate...

Her elbows hit the desk and her head fell into her hands.

The scuffle of footsteps. A tentative touch on her shoulder. She looked up to find Scott crouched down beside her, blue eyes intense. No longer towering above her, now looking up at her. “You are safe, Anna. I promise.”

He held her gaze. He was the commander of International Rescue. He was asking her to trust him.

Trust him.

“You. Are. Safe.”

So many questions. How could they monitor her at all times? Her family? Her friends? Her students? It wasn’t humanly possible.

But this was International Rescue, they dealt in miracles, they made things happen.

A lump caught in her throat.

Voice small. “Okay.”

Those eyes softened just a little and his hand squeezed her shoulder.

His voice was gentle, no doubt the same voice he used on frightened people he was rescuing.

She was frightened people.

Could she be rescued?

A flicker of steel in those eyes answered that question.

“Kyrano is in charge of your security, John is monitoring from orbit and Jack is tackling the legalities. We will find those responsible and remove the threat. International Rescue has resources across the globe and we are mobilising. You need us, that phone will have a Thunderbird on your doorstep in minutes.”

She stared at him. “All for one small town school teacher.”

He unfolded and straightened up to his full height, looking down at her. The confident and certain young man returned and steeled his stance. “It is what we do.”

A blink and she found herself believing him. It was little more than faith. Hope.

“Okay.” This time her voice was stronger. “Tell me what I need to do.”

That suave smile curved his lips again.

-o-o-o-

 Epilogue

 “Okay, class, pull up page 58 in your grammar text and read the first two paragraphs. I want you to write an expressive piece using first person and present tense. One hundred words minimum.”

She didn’t miss the twin groans from the holoprojector on her desk. She had to smile, they often forgot they were in a class of twenty-odd students and their reactions were obvious. “Alan and Rory, I heard that.”

“Sorry, Ms Kent.” Alan had his head in one hand and appeared thoroughly bored. Rory didn’t even bother to answer. He was doodling on his tablet.

An arched eyebrow. “Alan, I didn’t say what the topic had to be. Perhaps you could write about flying a rocket into space?”

That caught his attention. “I could?”

“You could. And if you finish quickly enough, you could illustrate it.”

Gemma was bouncing in her seat, her hand in the air. “Ms Kent, can I write about a rocket, too?”

Anna smiled. “Of course, you are all welcome to write about subjects that interest you. You have the next forty-five minutes to complete the exercise. Make it yours, make it into whatever you want.”

She didn’t miss the grumble from Jonathon about making it into a way to get out of here. He was overdue some special attention. She wrote a note on her tablet.

All the heads in the room bent down to read.

All except Rory.

She eyed her dejected student who was still doodling. A touch at her own screen and she pulled up what the boy was drawing.

A number of words scattered over his screen, all angry and understandable, interspersed with abstract figures and angry lines.

He was having one of those days.

A sigh and she touched her headset to confine his audio to her alone. His holofigure was removed from the classroom and confined to her screen.

She didn’t miss Alan’s sudden raised eyebrow as he looked up from his work.

Rory received the notification that he was on privacy mode and looked up at her sullenly. “What have I done now?”

She suppressed another sigh. Voice quiet so the class couldn’t hear. “Nothing, Rory. I was just going to suggest that you could write this piece of text using whatever is on your mind today. You don’t have to present it to the class, it can be a private piece.”

“Don’t wanna.”

Her lips thinned. Definitely one of those days. “Do you need a break? Should I speak to your mother?”

“No!” His eyes were alarmed. “Leave Mom outta this.”

Her heart lurched. There was only so much she was capable of doing to help Rory. But she would use what little reach she had to do the best she could. “Want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

Still doodling. Apparently, he had forgotten she could see what he wrote on his tablet. Bloody leave me alone was certainly clear enough.

“Okay, Rory, try to write something. It might help.” So much anger. Understandable, but it needed to be managed. She would speak to Rory’s counsellor later today and see if there was another strategy that could help. Rory was slowly working through it all, he just needed a little help.

As for her other long distance student...

“Gordon, getoff!”

The class burst into laughter as Gordon Tracy suddenly appeared in Alan’s stream and gave the younger boy a thorough noogie.

It didn’t last long, as a red flannelled arm reached into the feed and yanked the fish out of receiver range.

Alan, hair now sticking up at all angles, glared at something the rest of the class couldn’t see. “Serves you right, fishboy!”

Blue eyes widened as Alan reacted to something Anna couldn’t hear, but its contents were obvious as the eleven-year-old snapped back to attention, guilt under her gaze. He hurriedly returned to reading his tablet.

Someone in the class snickered.

Anna raised an eyebrow at the room and all heads ducked back to work.

Rory started writing a story about a boy who was scared.

Alan was describing Thunderbird Three...another paper she would have to save to the locked server John had provided for all such possible technology breaches.

The wind rustled through the rosemary bush outside the schoolroom window.

Her phone flashed up with an apology from Virgil regarding Gordon. Apparently, he was sentenced to cleaning the bilge pumps of the family boat. An unusual punishment task, but then the Tracys were an unusual family.

A glance at the room’s security camera. It had become a nervous habit.

An internal sigh.

Unusual indeed.

-o-o-o-

FIN.

[slapshot-to-the-heart]

Flatbush & Atlantic: part x

part i part ii part iii part iv part v part vi part vii part viii part ix

And we’ve finally come to the end of Cass and Mat’s story! I want to thank every person who’s read this over the past few months, especially those of you who have reblogged, commented, and shared this with your friends. Your feedback means the world to me, and please tell me what you think of this final part! I’ve also got some ideas floating around for an epilogue, so don’t be surprised if that pops up in the next few weeks.

part x

May 21 (fri)

For once, it wasn’t Cass’ alarm that woke her up. Her internal clock didn’t let her sleep in past 6, but as she lay in her bed, comforter pulled up to her chin and curls up in a haphazard messy bun, a realization struck her. She didn’t have anything to do, and that was just about as far from normal for her as possible. Normally, she’d be hopping in the shower at this time, getting out and shoveling some cereal down her throat before running to catch the train, or desperately trying to finish some last-minute reading before an early lecture. Her grandparents’ flight didn’t land at JFK until 1, and she wouldn’t need to leave until an hour before that to get Mat and drive to the airport. 

Padding out to the kitchen, she just caught Ryanne, who was about to leave for a clinical rotation. “What department are you in this month?” Cass asked.

“OB/GYN,” Ryanne responded. “I got to observe a birth the other day, and it was one of my favorite things I’ve gotten to do so far. Obviously I don’t know for sure yet, but I think I might want to match into it. You get to do a little bit of everything — there’s some surgery, some routine care, some deliveries. And with the Black maternal health crisis, I figure we need all the Black OBs we can get as a country.” 

Cass smiled. “That’s wonderful, I’m glad to hear.” She knew that Ryanne had been a little stressed out with the prospect of trying to pick a residency; she hadn’t felt drawn to any of the other rotations she’d gone through quite like this one. 

“What about you? What’s your schedule like today?” Ryanne asked as she poured coffee into her travel mug. 

Cass flopped down on the couch, looking over at her. “It’s just...I have nothing to do. Nothing needs to get done. No cases to read, no essays to finish, no paperwork to file or anything. Chris gave me this week off for finals anyways, so I couldn’t even go into the office if I wanted to because there’s just nothing for me to do. Do you know how rare that is for me?”

Ryanne laughed. “Cass, I’m in med school. The last time I had a true ‘off day’ was two weeks ago, and even then I spent most of it studying.” She slung her backpack over one shoulder. “See you tonight, have a good day, babe!”

After some toast and a smoothie, Cass was back on the couch, trying desperately to think of something to do. She thrived on being busy, thrived on feeling like she was needed and contributing to something worthwhile. Pushing herself up, she walked back to her room, deciding to change and go out for a run. Cass liked to keep in shape and exercise as often as she could, even though it had been a few years since she had been on an organized sports team. She was usually able to make yoga classes at the school gym twice a week, but typically didn’t have the spare time in the mornings for a run. And by the time she got back it was almost always dark, way too late to even think about going out alone. 

Lacing up her tennis shoes and grabbing her AirPods and keys, she set out, down the stairs and past the door. As she jogged down the streets, making familiar turn after familiar turn, Cass realized something remarkably profound. Every place she passed had played a part in the last three years. St. Lucy’s, where she had stumbled in with inconsolable tears after her abuelo’s stroke, lighting a candle and praying with some old Italian woman for his recovery. The bodega on the corner run by Carlos Gonzalez, one of the first people she met when she moved to the city and the only one who knew how to smoosh her sandwiches down how she likes. The Edible Arrangements where she, Stella, and Ryanne had bought Alicia a congratulatory fruit bouquet for finally asking out her coworker Juliette. They had been dating for six months. The high school she passed every morning on her way to the subway station. These were the people and places that had made her life what it was, and she owed them her thanks. 

An hour and five miles later, Cass decided to call it quits, walking the last few blocks back to the apartment as a sort of cool-down. She jumped in the shower, throwing her hair up in a towel once she got out and resigning herself to watching whatever was on TV. Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives it was, apparently. Four episodes and one snack break later, it was time to get in the car to head over and pick up Mat. Cass drove down Manhattan Island, tapping her fingers in boredom as she hit yet more traffic. It was noon, why was there even traffic in the first place? She pulled into the visitor’s spot in the underground lot of Mat’s apartment complex, taking out her phone. Just got here! Mat popped out of the elevator a few minutes later, holding a bouquet of tulips. “Sorry I’m late, I was going back and forth between tulips and sunflowers for awhile, but I figured the pink was maybe a better choice? What do you think?” Cass started to laugh, and Mat looked offended. “What?”

“Babe, it’s so sweet that you want to impress my grandma, but have you thought about how the poor flowers will fare?”

His brow furrowed. “What do you mean?”

Cass adjusted her seatbelt, leaning over. “We’re going to be out for awhile. We’re not going straight back to their hotel. So…” she prompted.

“They’ll wilt.” Mat finished, his face falling. 

She covered his hand with her own. “Don’t worry. It’s a sweet gesture and I’m sure she’ll appreciate them. We’re all going out for dinner after the ceremony tomorrow, why don’t you bring them then?” 

He perked up. “I’ll run up and put them back in a vase, be back in a few!” Mat gave Cass a quick peck on her cheek, leaving her with just one question. Mat owned vases? He slid back into the passenger’s seat shortly after, clicking his seatbelt in and connecting his phone to the speakers. 

Cass rolled her eyes. “I don’t know a single guy your age who’s not obsessed with John Mayer. It’s kind of weird, honestly.”

“You don’t like him?” Mat asked curiously. Cass was usually into more guitar-based, acoustic stuff, so he figured she’d be into at least some of his stuff. 

“Some of it,” Cass responded, pulling out of the lot and onto the street. “Go ahead and play it, I don’t mind at all. Not what I’d usually put on if I’m alone, that’s all.”

Mat nodded, looking absentmindedly out the window. “So, what should I know about your grandparents?”

Cass’ face immediately burst into a smile at their mention. It was always so clear how much she loved her family, and that was one of Mat’s favorite things about her. How hard she loved. “Alright, so it’s Dolores and Roberto Cabrera. They’re wonderful people, I genuinely think you’re going to like them a lot. They’re both super fluent in English, so don’t worry about communication. They originally immigrated to Texas when they were in their teens, abuela was a housekeeper at a few hotels in San Antonio and abuelo worked in the fields for awhile before getting a job at a little hardware store in town, where he worked until they retired. My mom’s the middle of four, two older sisters and a younger brother.”Mat listened intently. “My abuelo’s a little more rough around the edges, so don’t be surprised if he gives you  a little bit of a hard time, but it’s not out of malice or anything. He’s always been very protective over us, my mom and her siblings, and now us three. He might do the whole ‘nobody’s good enough for my Cassidy” thing, but he’ll get over it. He means well.” 

She glanced over at Mat, who was looking decidedly nervous. “Seriously, chou, it’s going to be fine. Abuela’s totally different, they’re like polar opposites. I can almost guarantee that she’ll say something to the effect of ‘if my granddaughter loves you, I love you.’ Very much go with the flow, she’ll probably want to come over to your apartment and cook for you.” Her expression softened. “As long as you’re kind and respectful, they won’t have an issue with you, Mat. They’ll see that you treat me how I deserve to be treated and love me like I deserve to be loved.”

Cass pulled into the garage by the international arrivals terminal, cutting the gas and checking the time. “The flight was supposed to land at one, so they should be getting out of passport control by the time we get inside.” It was a little after one thirty, but if there was anything Cass knew, it was just how long customs could take at an airport as big as JFK. Even in the middle of the afternoon on a weekday, and even though her grandparents were travelling on their American passports and could use the citizen’s line, she had heard that it could take upwards of an hour or two to get through. 

The concourse was pretty bare apart from a few kiosks selling “I ❤️ NY” shirts and a surprisingly busy Noah’s Bagels, so Mat and Cass made themselves comfortable on one of the rows of plastic chairs lining the room. The arrivals screen had marked their flight from Mexico City as having landed nearly an hour prior, so it was little surprise when Cass popped up from the chair, straightening her shirt and walking over to a couple that he could only assume were her grandparents. Mat quickly followed, catching up to her just as she threw her arms around her grandma. “Abuela, te extrañé,” she said, the sound muffled by Dolores’ scarf. She pulled back, kissing her grandpa on the cheek before stepping over to Mat, one hand placed reassuringly on his back. “Abuela, abuelo, this is Mat, my boyfriend.”

Mat stuck his hand out, shaking theirs. “Mr. and Mrs. Cabrera, it’s so amazing to finally meet you. Cass speaks so highly of you, and she always talks about her summers in Hermosillo.” 

Dolores pulled Mat in, embracing him from the start just as Cass had expected. “Mat, it’s wonderful to finally meet you. Cassidy has told us so much about you, it’s clear she loves you a great deal.”

Mat ducked his head and blushed. “I’m not sure if she can love me more than I love her, but I’m happy to be in such good company.” 

He took both of their suitcases as Cass gestured to the sliding doors. “I want to get back to the car before they charge me for another half hour,” she said. 

Mat slid the bags in the trunk of the car as Dolores got in the passenger’s seat. With a gulp, Mat realized that meant he had to sit next to Roberto. He had been perfectly nice on the walk over, but as Cass had warned him, it was clear that he was a little guarded. Whether that was just his personality or whether Mat had yet to earn his trust hadn’t been determined. 

Her grandparents had been to New York once or twice before, but it had almost always been just to fly in before driving up to visit Cass’ family in Connecticut; they had never really been able to see the city. Cass  felt strongly that that had to change, so she had arranged for a mini-tour of Manhattan before they got dropped off at their hotel for the night. “So, Mat,” Dolores said, turning around in her chair, “Cassidy tells us you’re a hockey player? That must be so exciting, how long have you been playing?”

Mat nodded. “Yes ma’am. I play for the Islanders, so we’re right here in Brooklyn, but I live over in Manhattan. I’ve been playing the sport since I was four or so? Really little. But I just finished my fourth season on the Islanders. And it is exciting, I love being with my team and being on the ice, it’s one of the best feelings in the world.” 

“That must keep you busy, though?” Roberto asked gruffly. 

Mat froze. He couldn’t lie and say that he was home all the time, able to be there for Cass as often as he’d like to, because he wasn’t. But if he let on just how often he was gone, would that make him even more wary? “Oftentimes, yes,” Mat began slowly. “The team’s usually on two or so road trips a month, they’re usually about a week long. But they’re balanced out with plenty of home games, and there’s lots of guys who balance the job with a family and other responsibilities. I’m always excited to be able to be back in New York, I love it here. And to be with Cass.” Roberto nodded, not seemingly totally satisfied but content enough to not push the issue further. 

“He’s really good about spending time with me, abuelo, even though we’ve both got busy schedules,” Cass added, catching Roberto’s eye in the rearview mirror. “We meet in the morning before a class to get coffee, or lunch in between studying if I’ve got time. I go to every game I’m able to when he’s playing here in the city, or over in Jersey. We spend plenty of time together, he doesn’t blow me off. You don’t have to worry.” He seemed much more at ease with his granddaughter’s response. 

It was a whirlwind three hours around New York, Cass playing chauffeur as they went to the top of the Empire State Building — her pick — in St. Patrick’s Cathedral  — her grandpa’s pick — and around Central Park, stopping at one of the many pretzel carts for a snack. They dropped them off at the hotel, Cass’ eyes getting misty as her grandma pulled out the serape stole from her purse. Her fingers danced over the colors, the stripes of red and blue and pink and green, and knowing that it was made by the hands of someone so important to her made it all the more beautiful. The rest of her family was driving in later that night, after Nick got out of school, so everyone wouldn’t be together until the graduation ceremony the next day. 

The couple decided to get takeout on the way back to Mat’s apartment, Mat jumping out of the car to run in and pick up the order while Cass circled the block until he was out. As they sat on the couch, cuddled into each other as they broke into the boxes of Chinese food, Cass thought absentmindedly that Mat handled his chopsticks way better than she ever would have given him credit for. Her grandparents had been on her mind. More specifically, her grandparents and Mat had been on her mind. It wasn’t that she thought he had messed up in any way — she was positive he’d absolutely won over her grandma and her grandpa was slowly but surely coming around — but some lingering concerns about what they might think about their relationship. “I’m not sure that they’d actually care, but when you talk to them tomorrow maybe don’t mention how often I sleep over here? They’re wonderful people, but they’re a little old school about this stuff.” 

“This stuff?” Mat asked curiously. 

“Living together, sex before marriage, that kind of stuff.” 

“And how do you feel about it?” 

Cass raised an eyebrow at him. “Do you think you could ever get me to do something I didn’t want to do? I’m way too stubborn for that.” Mat threw his head back, laughing. “But seriously. I don’t make the decision lightly, because commitment and intimacy in that way is something really big and important to me. You already knew that I don’t do hookups, it’s just not my thing. But I can see this, us, going places. I want us to go places. And I’ve never been very good at listening to people when I don’t want to. So I’ve made my peace that my choices might not be ones everyone would be thrilled with, but it doesn’t really matter to me as long as I have you.” 

Mat nodded, putting down his food to card one hand through her curls. “I get that, I do. Obviously that’s not so much the attitude with a lot of the boys, but your principles are part of what makes you who you are, and I love who you are. Every part of you.” Cass smiled against his neck, leaning down and kissing him on the shoulder. “I want us to go places too, I hope you know that.”

“Glad to hear.”

They ate without speaking for a few more minutes until Mat broke the silence. “Where do you see yourself in five years?” 

“With you,” Cass answered honestly. “Here, or we could get a nice brownstone over in Brooklyn.” 

“Somewhere with a yard,” Mat mused. 

“Yeah, a yard would be nice,” Cass agreed. “I’d like to get a dog, I’ve always grown up with dogs and it would be nice to have someone to keep me company when you’re gone.” Her family’s two dogs, Patches and Scout, were back at the house in Connecticut, and on more than one occasion, Cass had made the two-hour drive up just to see them. She paused, glancing down at her hands. “In five years? You’d better have put a ring on my finger by then, Mat. I’ll be almost thirty. Approaching old maid status” 

Mat laughed, an easy, breathy sort of laugh that somehow erased all of the tension in the room. “I think you should double-hyphen.” 

Cass looked at him doubtfully. “Cabrera-Shaw-Barzal? Yeah, I’m going to have to pass on that one.” 

He shrugged, the corner of his lip pulled up in a half-smile. “Just saying. It’s got a ring to it.”

“Have you given much thought to what you’d want to do with your name when you get married?” Mat asked curiously. It really didn’t matter much to him, since it would ultimately be Cass’ decision, but he didn’t want to assume anything regardless. And it didn’t escape Cass that he said when, as if it was certain, as if it was a given. The surety made her heart flutter. 

Cass shook her head. “Not particularly. On one hand, I do like the idea of the whole family having the same name. It seems nice. Unified. But I don’t want to feel like I’m erasing my culture and who I am just because I’m getting married. And all due respect, chou,” Cass poked Mat’s cheek, “but Cabrera Shaw’s the name on my degrees. Cassidy Barzal didn’t go to law school.”

“Very fair,” Mat said with a chuckle. 

Cass took a deep breath. If it seemed like they were having the “future talk,” she figured it was best to go all in. “Do you want kids?” she asked, tentatively, hesitantly. It was obvious that Mat was good with kids, she’d seen as much, but being good with kids and wanting children of your own were two very different things. Cass had wanted to be a mom since she knew what a mom was, and even though they probably should have brought up the topic earlier, she wasn’t sure what she’d do if he said no. Thank God, she never had to find out. 

“Definitely,” Mat said, nodding. “Not now, obviously, we’re young and haven’t really settled down yet. If you got pregnant we’d make it work, but I don’t think either of us is looking to be parents right away. But in a couple years, once we’re married and have a proper house with space...Yeah, I’d like to have kids.” He looked over at Cass. “What about you?”

“Always wanted kids,” Cass responded fondly. “I loved growing up with siblings, and I know my parents were the same way. Two or three, I think. I’ve thought about adoption too, but obviously that’s way in the future.”

Mat kissed the top of her head. “We’ve got time.”

 May 22 (sat)

 The graduation ceremony itself wasn’t until noon, so Cass had more than enough time to get ready after waking up at 7. Alicia barrelled into her room at exactly 7:22, throwing a shirt at her and telling her to get dressed. Cass stumbled out of the room ten minutes later, pulling on socks and grabbing her phone from the charger by her door. “What are you guys trying to pull?” she asked, yawning and trying to wipe the sleep out of her eyes. 

“Uh, we’re going to the diner, duh,” Stella said with a smile, tossing Cass her purse. “Come on! You know it fills up early on weekends.” Glen’s Diner had become an apartment staple over the past few years, the restaurant having been the first place the four of them had eaten in the city when they moved, not having bought groceries yet and not wanting to pay the premium for delivery. It was cheap, open 24/7, and Cass would swear up and down that their blueberry pancakes were the best she’d ever had. 

They were seated just after 8, happily slurping coffee and stealing bites of each other’s breakfast twenty minutes later. It was a nice day and hadn’t gotten too hot yet, so they decided to walk back after finishing the meal. In reality, “going back” meant Alicia stopping to buy a new necklace, listening to a busker for a few minutes, and petting no fewer than five dogs on the one-mile walk. There was still plenty of time before they had to leave for the ceremony, but after Cass did her makeup and tamed her curls, there was just enough time to watch an episode of Parks & Rec before having to actually get her stuff together. Not as flexible as she once had been, Ryanne helped zip up the back of her dress, a white lace bodycon from her sorority days that she had definitely worn to at least two semiformals. Hey, Cass thought as she straightened her hemline, if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it. 

She had ironed her robe and put it into a dress bag the night before, and gently folded her school stole and the serape from her abuela into her purse. Mat’s necklace hadn’t left its place since Valentine’s. Her dad’s parents had given her a beautiful pair of pearl studs for her undergraduate graduation, and it felt only right to wear them for her next step. She fastened the ankle straps on her heels, and popped her head out to the living room. “Everyone ready?” She was met with a chorus of “yeses,” and grabbed her keys from their dish by the front door. 

“Let’s go get our girl graduated!” Alicia hollered into the street. 

The girls had originally objected to Cass driving herself to her own graduation, but relented as soon as Cass reminded them that she was the only one who knew where to find the free parking, and the rest of them only drove sedans. “Cheryl has way more room. Y’all want to be cramped on purpose?” 

“Fair point,” Stella had said begrudgingly. 

Exactly twenty-six minutes later, Cass pulled into a spot about two blocks away from the arena where she would be graduating in an hour’s time, hugging each of her friends as Ryanne handed her the dress bag. “You’re going to kill it in there,” she said, rubbing her back. 

Cass laughed. “Ry, all I’ve got to do is walk across a stage without tripping.”

She shrugged. “It’s a fine art that few have mastered.” 

Cass entered through the side, flashing her ID to the security guard standing by the door. Half an hour later, everyone had been ushered into their seats, carefully arranged in alphabetical order. For the most part, Cass was friendly with everyone in her class; if they weren’t outwardly hostile to her, she saw no reason why they deserved anything other than kindness, but was relieved to see Robin sitting next to her. “You excited?” Robin asked, brushing a piece of her auburn hair behind her ear. The lobby doors must have opened, because as she asked, crowds started to mill into the seats, waving at anyone who would catch their eye. 

Cass bounced her head. “I am, but it’s kind of surreal, you know? I knew we’d get to this point, obviously. It’s what we’ve been working towards for seven years, really. But the idea that it all essentially comes down to this…”

“An hour, a few handshakes, and a piece of paper,” Robin helpfully supplied. 

She nodded. “Yeah. It’s almost anticlimactic in a way? Like sure, we’ve got our JDs after this, but knowing we’ve still got to pass the bar. We’re not over the finish line yet.”

“Columbia has a 97% pass rate, and you’re one of the smartest people I’ve ever met, Cass. And I’ve spent three years surrounded by the smartest people I’ve ever met.”

“Fair,” Cass said, “it’s just kind of a weird feeling, you know?” Robin nodded. “And plus, for most of us, we’ve pretty much spent our whole lives in school. Aside from positions as summer associates, or part-time jobs and internships, we don’t really know how to do anything other than school. It’s just a little bit of a daunting thought to suddenly feel like we’re being thrown out to the wolves without really knowing what to expect.” Cass’ phone, which she wasn’t technically supposed to have but had snuck in anyways, chose that moment to buzz with a text notification. It was from Mat.

Met up with the crew! Can’t wait to see you walk across that stage, Cass. I love you and we’re all so proud of you. Mat had attached a photo of everyone she had brought with her — both sets of grandparents, her parents and siblings, and roommates. 

“Your boyfriend is nauseatingly cute,” Robin observed, looking over her shoulder at the message. 

Cass laughed. “That’s true, but I knew what I was getting myself into.” The music started ten minutes later, and the ceremony began. If Cass was being honest, she didn’t really remember much of anything from the first half of the ceremony, before the conferral of diplomas. She was so excited and nervous and unbelievably ready all at the same time that all she recalled from the dean’s speech and the student speeches were vague comments about their “awesome responsibility” and “duty to pursue truth and justice” and “commitment to fight for what is right over what is easy.” 

As soon as she realized it, her row was being ushered into line to receive their diplomas. “Cassidy María Cabrera Shaw.” She heard her name, but really had no clue who had spoken it. The dean? One of her professors? As Cass walked up the steps and across the stage, the only thing she could think was don’t trip don’t trip don’t trip. Then she was handed a diploma, flashed a brilliant smile for the photographer, and shook hand after hand after hand before walking off the other side of the stage. She was pretty sure she could hear Mat and Noah yelling their congratulations from her seat on the floor. 

Having a name towards the front of the alphabet meant that Cass was almost always called on quickly in class, or on roll call, or at graduation, as the case was. But that meant that she had to sit, quietly and politely, for the other four hundred names to be called. And it took awhile. After Robin Cahill came Wesley Coleman, then Samuel Cogswell, then Fiona Chan. Cass didn’t mind having to sit through the whole thing, especially when Fiona, Les, Samaira, and her other friends crossed the stage — she cheered as much as anybody — but it was a long time to be sitting in a folding chair and the thousands of people packed into a small space didn’t help her temperature regulation. 

There was the benediction and congratulations, and then the recessional of the graduates. Graduates, Cass thought. She was a graduate. She had finished, she was done, she had accomplished the one thing she wanted most to do since she was a little girl watching Legally Blonde for the first time, looking at Elle Woods and thinking I can do that. And she had. Her feet carried her to the back room of their own accord, where she picked up her bag and was engulfed in a flurry of hugs, congratulations, and kisses on the cheek from her friends, the people who she had spent countless late nights in the library with, bar hopping to celebrate the end of finals, and afternoons on each other’s apartment couches, yelling fact patterns at each other and trying to come up with an analysis before the timer went off.  

Following the stream of sky blue graduation gowns, Cass walked outside, waving at her family when she spotted Eliana hanging off of a lamppost in the courtyard to get a better view. Her sister nearly tackled her as she made her way to the group. “Cass. I already knew you were brilliant, and I still think  you’re the smartest out of any of us,” she gestured between the two of them and Noah, “but now you’ve got the degree to prove it. I’m so proud of you.” 

Noah was next. “You worked hard, and I know how badly you wanted this. You’re a really good sister.” He wasn’t usually a big talker, and Cass’ eyes definitely got a little misty as he spoke. He had verbally committed to Minnesota State the week before, and Mat might have been more excited than even Cass when he heard the news. It was an incredible program that had a serious track record of sending players to the NHL, and she was so proud to see her little brother doing what he loved. Her mom and both grandmas were crying, as expected, and Grandpa Joe wrapped her up in a hug as soon as he got the chance. 

Mat had been hanging towards the back of the crowd, not wanting to feel like he was intruding on family time, until her dad nudged him forward. “Go say hi to your girl, Mat,” Patrick said.

“Will do,” Mat said, squeezing Cass’ hand and pressing a quick kiss to the top of her head. “Sometimes it blows my mind how incredible you are,” he said. “Everyone’s already said how smart you are, and every bit of that is true. But you’re so much more than that, you know?” His thumb rubbed over her hand. “You’re beautiful, and curious, and you always keep me on my toes. You’re so passionate about your work, and you’ve got the biggest heart out of anyone I know. You’ve never met a person you didn’t want to help. And I promise I’m not biased just because I’m in love with you.” 

Cass gave a watery laugh, blinking and thanking God she had the foresight to wear waterproof mascara. “God, I love you, Mat.”

Her dad had always been the picture type, insisting on documenting every waking moment. He was the living embodiment of “pics or it didn’t happen,” for better or worse. He took a few of her with her law school friends, then Alicia snapped one with just her immediate family, then there was one with everyone. Cass also got a picture with Mat, where he was bending down to kiss her, the tassel on her mortarboard just barely brushing his nose. Then she was in one with all of the seniors on the law review, and a friend pulled her away for a few with the Latinx Student Association. By the time they finally managed to tear Patrick away from his camera, it was time to head back to the hotel and get ready for dinner. 

Mat got Patrick to send him the photo of him and Cass, and was about to post it on Instagram when he hesitated. “Hey, is it cool if I post this?” Mat said, showing Cass his phone. Most people knew who she was, and he had posted pictures of her before, but they had never been this obvious, this clear, this real. 

“Go for it.”

Mat pressed post. So, so proud of my incredible girlfriend @casscshaw for graduating law school. You’re one of the smartest, most empathetic people I know, and you’re going to make an amazing lawyer. 

Cass grinned, a big, genuine smile as she was surrounded by her family, the people who meant the most to her — whether they were related or not. She looked up at Mat, who was smiling softly down at her as he reached one hand up to fix her tassel. “What’s next?”

[takingcourage]

Miscalculations: A Witness AU

Chapter Eight

Catch up here: Prologue, Chapter One, Chapter Two, Chapter Three, Chapter Four, Chapter Five, Chapter Six, Chapter Seven

Pairing: M!Cassian x MC

Word Count: 2,700 

Series Summary: After years apart, fate brings Kellen and Cassian together a third time. Can they learn from the mistakes of the past, or are they destined to repeat them once more?

Note: This is the last official chapter of the series, though you can expect to see a brief epilogue on Sunday. The last two installments are mostly self-indulgent fluff, but I hope you enjoy them anyway. 😊  

It was the sunlight that woke him. 

Cassian’s eyes fluttered open under its glow, his body vaguely aware of a weight clinging to him from behind. Forsaking dreamworlds for reality, his sight landed on the slender fingers outstretched on his chest. He disrupted the layer of blankets just enough to withdraw the hand that was beneath them, bringing it up to caress the hinge of Kellen’s wrist. 

The touch wasn’t enough to wake her. She was every bit as deep a sleeper as she had been more than three years before. This morning, however, he couldn’t blame her for sleeping in. By the time he’d gotten in from his week-long trip to DC, it had been nearly midnight. After showing up to her apartment and taking a quick shower, he’d been all too willing to collapse into bed himself. 

The last three months had been incredible. Sure, there had been plenty of moments when her self-sufficiency and his desire to take care of her had pushed them in opposite directions, but at the end of it all, they always found themselves working together once more. True to her word, she’d stopped running away.

Kellen shifted behind him, producing the familiar pressure of her forehead between his shoulder blades. The leg around him tightened too, and Cassian felt a surge of affection along with his body’s natural response of desire. 

“Mmm. Good morning,” she greeted, nuzzling her face into his back. He returned the pleasantry and interlaced her fingers with his own.

“Owen’s still asleep?”

“I haven’t heard anything from him. It’s past 7:00, so I don’t think we have long.”

Slipping her hand from his grasp, she began a very pointed exploration of his chest. “Then we should make the most of it. Once he realizes you’re back, it’s going to be impossible to have you to myself.” 

He groaned as her touch delved deeper. “Kellen…” 

“Roll over,” she prompted, the whisper sending a shiver down his spine. He complied without hesitation, the change giving her all the incentive she needed to climb onto his stomach. A wave of anticipation coursed through him. 

He loved it when she took control. 

Before going any further, she leaned down for an unhurried kiss. “It’s good to have you back. I know it was only a few days, but I missed you.” 

“Are you getting sentimental on me?” he teased, one hand gliding up the inside of her forearm.

“Shut up.” In spite of the caustic response, she still shivered visibly under his touch. 

Laughing at her retort, Cassian had to catch his breath again between subsequent kisses. “I missed you too.” 

“Good.” She plied both hands through his hair, burying them deeply as she soothed the scalp beneath. Of their own volition, his eyes fell shut. “I’ve been thinking about what you said.” 

Such forays into discussion were unconventional. They had banter, certainly, but this was the first time she’d interrupted heavy kissing to talk about something serious. But unusual as it was, he still took her meaning immediately. His own mind went to their discussion less than a week before… and to the box zipped safely in the inner pocket of his carry on. 

Cassian looked up at her, confronted by her pensive gaze. In the ever-lightening bedroom, her eyes blazed like sapphires. “I didn’t mean to pressure you. I just needed you to know how serious I am about this. About us.” 

Beaming down at him, her lips parted to reveal two rows of perfect teeth. Guileless and content, she looked as happy as he’d ever seen her before.  Cassian reached up to brush the line of her jaw, marveling at the effect honesty and making room for her feelings had wrought on her demeanor. “Like I told you then, I can wait an awfully long time, Kellen.”

“I know. But I am thinking about it. Just thought you should know.” The moment over, she rolled her hips and brought more present matters back to the forefronts of their minds. 

With a throaty laugh, he rose to meet her lips. Both hands went to her sides, hoping to ease her down against his chest. Her small hands tightened on his wrists, pinning them to the mattress. “Not today,” she taunted, squeezing gently for reinforcement. 

His breath caught at the mischief in her eyes. When her lips descended once more, he was fully under her spell. They’d slept in just their underwear, so there was very little for her to remove, but she began the task of rolling his boxers down the length of his muscled legs. He was just lifting his knees to allow her access when she jerked away, scurrying toward the nightstand to grab the rest of her clothes. 

At the sound of quick footfalls on the carpet outside, he understood her sudden motivation. He had just enough time to tug his underwear back around his hips before the steps slowed and stopped altogether. 

“We’re going to have to make a rule about closed doors,” Cassian suggested as they watched the knob turn together. At his side, Kellen shot him a look that said it was as good as done. 

Owen trounced in, his pajamas rumpled and his hair sticking up to one side. Making his way to Cassian’s side of the bed, he pulled himself onto the mattress. His still-sleepy eyes flew wide when he saw the bed’s second occupant. 

“Daddy!”

He hardly had time to prepare himself for the tiny body before it collided with his chest, but Cassian found it impossible to be too upset by the interruption. Wrapping both arms around the child’s shoulders, he pulled him even tighter. “Morning, a stór.”

The moment soon passed, with Owen pulling back to exchange hugs with his mother before climbing into the space between them. The teasing, fiery Kellen of moments before was gone, replaced by someone soft and nurturing. As he watched her over their son’s head, Cassian couldn’t help wondering whether the changes she’d undergone in the last few years would ever cease to amaze him. 

Now that he thought about it, changes in his son were no less surprising than the ones in the woman he hoped to marry. At nearly three, he was much more independent than he’d been even months before, and his vocabulary and imagination were both expanding at rates that were almost alarming. 

As if sensing Cassian’s musings, Owen started wiggling beside him. Beginning with his shoulders, soon his whole body was shimmying with enough momentum to drive him under the pile of blankets. 

“What’re you doing there?”

“Borrowing!” came the muffled answer. 

“Burrowing,” Kellen corrected mildly. She flipped back the top of the bedsheet to expose his face, which furrowed to show his objection to being uncovered. “One of the books we got from the library is about animals in winter. There’s a whole page that explains how rodents burrow for warmth.”

“I see. Can I join ya?”

“Yeah!”

“Don’t burrow too far. I want to find you here when I come back,” Kellen admonished, climbing out of bed so she could pull the blankets up to the headboard. Once finished, she slipped into the master bathroom. 

“Of course!” Following the child’s technique, Cassian wormed his way beneath the covers -- a rather challenging task given his height and his desire not to fall off the mattress. 

Once he was completely submerged, he reached out a hand to find his son. He knew the boy’s general location, but he wasn’t quite sure of his position until his fingers found his torso. Cassian tickled the side of his stomach where the pajama shirt had started to ride up. 

The boy squealed and retaliated by extending his hands and feet in his father’s direction. Though his arms were too short to reach, his toes came just close though to make contact with Cassian’s bare belly. 

He sucked a breath at the sudden cold. “Are those toes?”

“Uh-huh,” Owen confirmed, squirming closer. Cassian caught the offending foot with one hand and held it to his eyes for pretend inspection. 

“Those aren’t toes -- they’re ice cubes!”

“No!” came the boy’s defiant response. 

“Are you sure?”

“Uh-huh!” 

“Then they’re perfect for tickling,” Cassian deduced, skimming the arch of the boy’s foot with the pad of his finger. 

Owen’s mouth flew open to protest, but peals of laughter were his only response. 

Releasing the foot, Cassian sidled away to evade the boy’s counterattack. Between the tickling and the dodging, the next several minutes faded into a humorous blur. 

“Daddy, I hot,” the boy complained finally, the slight whine in his voice giving Cassian pause.

He’d been too distracted to notice before, but a sheen of sweat was breaking out over his brow. Throwing back the covers, the two gasped for breath like drowning men. 

Kellen reentered, phone in hand. She took stock of the situation for a moment, shaking her head with amusement in spite of the rather dour expression she’d had coming in. 

“Something wrong?” Cassian inquired, pushing himself up to a seated position. 

“It snowed,” she reported somberly. Still flicking through the weather report on her screen, she wrinkled her nose at the glass below. “Up to ten inches in some places.” Craning her neck as if to look through the bedroom window, she made a sound of disgust. “Gross. I was going to run some errands too.”

“Snow!” Owen couldn’t resist running to the window himself. “Play with snow?”

“I’ll run them for ya. Owen can join me if he wants.”

“Yeah!”

Grinning at the plan, she rejoined him on the bed and pulled the covers back over her lap. “It also means you’re definitely spending the night again tonight. I’m not letting you travel across the city in this.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” There had been little chance of going back to his apartment anyway, but there was something satisfying in being relieved of the option altogether. 

They remained in bed together until the need for sustenance and coffee outweighed their desire to stay under the blankets. Braving the cold hallway on his own, Cassian made his way to the small kitchen and easily found the ingredients needed for breakfast. He was especially pleased to find bacon -- his son’s most recent favorite.  

As he removed ingredients from the pantry and started brewing coffee, he contemplated how much more comfortable he was now than the first time he’d cooked in this kitchen four months before. 

They’d made it to this stage gradually, starting with family days and dinners before progressing to sleepovers and weekends. For the past month, he’d spent more nights with them than he’d spent at his own apartment: a development he was exceedingly grateful for. His son now knew him as a fixture, and Kellen proved more and more all the time that the idea of commitment was no longer the threat it had once been. 

If he wasn’t mistaken, she’d come to appreciate it just as much as he had.

Smiling at the notion, he fixed a mug for each of them and made his way back to the bedroom. 

_____

Later in the afternoon, he and Owen returned from their time outside with cheeks that were pink and sore -- though more from smiling than from the cold. Thanks to Kellen’s dislike of snow, Cassian had been given the unique opportunity to teach their son how to step carefully over ice, catch snowflakes on his tongue, and stomp the excess snow from his tiny boots. They hadn’t spent much time playing in the snow itself on this particular outing, but the wintery air and the sight of snow had done both father and son a world of good. 

Kellen remained at the desk, just where they had left her a couple of hours before. However, a glance at her computer screen quickly told him that she was no longer working with spreadsheets. 

Once their snowy clothes had been discarded and the groceries put away, Cassian walked to her side. “Looking for a sunny getaway in the midst of this blizzard?” he teased, feasting his eyes on the sandy beaches on display. 

“Look what came up when I searched for rentals on Nantucket.” She clicked through the images to land on the picture of a small cottage: one that would be engrained in Cassian’s memory for as long as he lived.

“It’s an Airbnb now?” At her answering nod, he continued. “How much?”

Kellen breathed a laugh and hovered over the pricing information. “Doesn’t matter, but it’s reasonable. Should I see if they have any availability this summer?” 

“You sure you could handle being cooped up there again? It’s pretty small.” 

“If it’s just the two of us and Owen, we’ll be fine. Besides, it would be fun to go back.” She shot him a sincere smile.

“I think there’s a romantic in you after all.” 

She shied away from the claim, but not from the kiss that followed. “I’d like to take Owen someday. Give him a chance to play in the sand and swim in something other than a pool.”

“Sounds like a great family vacation. I wouldn’t mind seeing you in a swimsuit again either.” 

Kellen cast a lingering look over his own well-covered body. “The thought did cross my mind. I’ll see what I can find.” 

“I’ll go and get this snowman into the tub.” 

Between their playtime outside and the bathtime shenanigans that followed, Cassian had no trouble getting the boy to fall asleep for his nap. If he wasn’t mistaken, the exhausted child would be out for a solid ninety minutes at least. 

Kellen was waiting when he arrived back in the living room. “I made a reservation. Five whole days, all to ourselves in that cozy cottage,” she waggled her eyebrows flirtatiously. “Whatever will we do with all that time?”

“Swim, go for walks on the beach, build sand castles...”

“You know what I mean.” 

“Mmm, I do,” he agreed, running a thumb over her exposed collarbone. He stopped upon reaching the collar of her shirt. “But we won’t be all alone -- we’ll have Owen with us.” 

“He’ll still take an afternoon nap. And be asleep by 8:00 every night. We’ll have plenty of time to ourselves.” 

“Like we did this morning?”

“Ugh. I forgot to talk to him about knocking before he comes in.” Her lips curled into a pout, and Cassian found himself with a strong desire to kiss it from her face. 

“We’ll have plenty of time to teach him before this summer… and he’s not here now.” 

Catching his drift, she toyed with the hem of his sweatshirt. “Are you suggesting that I get you naked again, Cassian?” She trailed one finger beneath the waistband of his jeans, and his stomach tensed at the contact. 

“I’m just suggesting that it might be an opportune time to finish what we started this morning,” he choked out the words, concentration growing increasingly difficult as her hand progressed. 

Kellen flashed him a wicked smile before pulling the hand back. “Maybe we should take this to the bedroom, then.” Standing from her chair, she slipped both arms around his neck and leaned in close to his chest. 

He sighed into the soft press of her curves. “Maybe we should.” 

Bending at the knees, he positioned his arms at her thighs and the small of her back, catching her weight easily as he pulled her off balance.    

Nose to his neck, he felt the moment her gasp of surprise turned to laughter. “I can walk there myself, you know.”

“I seem to remember you making a similar protest in the past, yes.” Taking a step forward, he shifted her to get a view of her face. “Are you trying to say that you don’t need me?”

“I’d never be so foolish,” she declared, trailing such a light finger along his ear and jawline that he thought he’d dreamt the contact. An instant later, the feisty glint returned to her eyes. “I’ll show you just how much I need you if we ever make it to the bedroom.” 

It was Kellen’s nature to default back to flirtation, but the moment of earnest sincerity was more than enough to satisfy. In it, there was a promise that his mornings would be filled with with blanket tents and full pots of coffee, that each day would brim with their son’s laughter and Kellen’s teasing, and that their lives together would overflow with love. 

How could he ever want anything more? 

[fics-not-tragedies]

One Day in December: Chapter 8 🎇

one - two - three - four - five - six - seven - eight - nine - ten - epilogue

This chapter is second to the last and I hope it’s a good one!

Words:  3669; Warnings: some nice gentle smut; Summary: Another year Bianca and Andrew decide to ditch the annual party.

Hozier tag list:

@letoursilencebreaktonight​​​​​​​​​; @angelpeachamber​​​​​​​​​; @sgt-morgan​​​​​​​​​; @julessbrown​​​​​​​​​;

December 2017

Andrew sat in the car, head back against the seat, waiting. He texted her earlier, just to confirm that she’d definitely be there. It was ridiculous that they wouldn’t just meet someplace else instead of the stupid party… but neither of them really made the effort to suggest another option. Besides, she was right; it was kind of tradition…

The tour was over. He was done. Promotion for this last album drained him, and he was exhausted. The minute he got back to his home in Wicklow, he slept. And slept. And then slept some more. And when he thought he couldn’t possibly sleep anymore… he did. It was a solid ten days before he fully emerged from his post-tour coma; and the first thing on his mind was someone; someone who deserved far better than how she was treated. He thought about the texts he and Bianca had sent over the last two years, and it made him sick to his stomach. The more he thought about it, the more he felt like he was actually going to be physically sick; and so he did. He splashed cool water on his face after he’d thrown up what little contents his stomach contained, and stared long and hard at his reflection in the mirror. He looked worse for wear, despite the endless hours of sleep these past two weeks. 

Sitting in the car now, he squinted, brow furrowed, as he thought back to that day nearly a month ago now, when he sent his first text to Bianca in over three months. His neck felt hot even now, thinking about how weird and awkward it had been. He knew she must have felt as strange as he did after all that time; and she was terribly short with him the first day or two.

Andrew didn’t care at all, he embraced it actually, willingly accepting her icy cold one or two word responses. She started to warm up to him again after a little while, and they went back to texting one another on a regular basis. The last conversation they had was about meeting up again; and so here Andrew sat. 

He got there early and waited, music quietly humming in the background as Andrew thought about Bianca and what she was going to look like this year. He hadn’t seen her in over two years, and he’d done nothing but dream about her and what she must look like now. The last time he’d seen her, he was a much different person; and he was positive she was too. He thought about her face when he’d said goodbye that January; heading back out on tour. It was like all the color and light was drained from her pretty face and it tore Andrew into a million pieces. He remembered lying in his bunk on the bus, picturing that expression over and over and over again. 

They broke it off not long after. 

Andrew absentmindedly felt around for his cigarettes and lighter, hoping it would calm his nerves. He was excited of course, but terrified he’d screw up all over again. He knew what he wanted from her and he hoped she wanted the same.

His phone buzzed across the dash, and he snapped it up, reading the message.

I’m just around the corner.  

Andrew froze, she was nearly there. He typed a quick ‘alright’ and pulled down the visor to check himself out one last time. He didn’t look amazing, but he did look better than he had and that was good enough. He fixed his hair back with the palms of his hands and took the cigarette from his lips, exhaling a deep breath he hadn’t known he was holding.

He ducked his head spotting a figure walking from the direction he knew her loft was located, and watched her for just a moment before he got out of his car. She was wearing a dress. Always a dress. And her tights had a pattern that he couldn’t quite make out, and she was wearing her fur coat; the same one she’d worn that last Christmas. His heart swelled when her face came into focus, and he closed his eyes trying to calm himself before he opened his door and got out. 

He could hear the clicking of her heels on the pavement, the crunch of the gravel beneath her soles, and for some reason it took him straight back to two-thousand-and-ten when she couldn’t get away from him fast enough. 

“Hey you” he called to her, his voice thick and heavy as it sailed across the bitter winter air. It echoed off the deserted pavement, his car too far away from the party for the noise to interfere.

Bianca looked around, trying to locate where his voice was coming from. He was dressed in nearly all black, probably looked like a shadow to her. When she spotted him, her face lit up. The smile that stretched across her face as she approached set Andrew in motion and he met her halfway. He didn’t even stop when he reached her, he couldn’t.

“I’m just gonna hug you… not even gonna ask…” he murmured as he leaned in to threw his long arms around her and hugged her close to his chest. 

Bianca closed her eyes and melted right into him. The knot in her throat felt thick and her stomach churned, but he was here, and he was real and that was all she could ask for. 

He didn’t let go. Andrew held her for as long as she would allow, the two of them in the middle of the empty street, snow flurries flying around them. 

“Are you crying?” Andrew asked her softly, “Because I am.”

Bianca laughed, the words catching on their way out, “I can’t help it.”

Andrew could feel the wetness seeping through his shirt to his chest and he sighed, squeezing her even tighter if that were possible, “I wanna look at you, but I don’t wanna let you go.”

“You can hold me and look at me” her muffled voice suggested and it made Andrew laugh.

“I suppose I could” he drawled and brushed his lips across the top of her head before leaning back a little and ducking his head to get her to look at him. Bianca lifted her head from his chest, her eyes glassy with fresh tears, her nose red, “Ah…” Andrew smiled, “I could swim in those eyes of yours…”

It was true. He thought about it a lot… getting lost in the pretty shades of her hazel irises, the amber and the olive and the mahogany. It was true, he thought about them enough to differentiate each color completely. 

Her cheeks burned, her eyelashes fluttering against them. Bianca could feel his fingers pressed into her shoulder blades and the small of her back, and she wanted to scream at him; ‘don’t ever let me go!’

“So how are you?” Andrew asked her softly, the deepness of his voice resonating through his chest and into hers. 

“Right now? Perfect” She smiled up at him, her arms still wound firmly around his back. 

The wind spiraled up around them, blowing her hair across her face, and he frowned in concentration as he sorted it all back out again. The snowflakes were caught in her toffee-colored bob and in her eyelashes, and she looked like the sweetest thing he’d ever seen. “Before this though, how were you doing?”

“Good. Normal” she eyed him curiously, “What about you?”

“Not that great” he admitted almost immediately, with a small chuckle, “But let’s not get into that right now. Because… we’re together.”

Andrew honestly felt better than he’d felt in he wasn’t sure how long, and his lips ached with the very strong desire to kiss her…

“Should we, um…” Bianca gestured towards the direction of the house with a nod of her head, and Andrew glanced at the festive decorations and the bright lights and the happy people coming and going; the loud music thumping…

“I…” Andrew didn’t really want to go now that he was with her, “… don’t know if…”

“I don’t really wanna go anymore” Bianca blurted, looking up at him again, “Do you wanna come back to mine?”

Andrew nodded his head and Bianca mirrored him with a smile and a sparkle in her eyes. Andrew walked her back to his car, opened the passenger door for her, and reluctantly let her go. He was going to be beside her in a second, but he was feeling hopelessly attached.

It was quicker than walking, but they had to take more streets to get there considering Bianca always took shortcuts, cutting across yards. They drove in silence. They both knew what was going to happen once they got there, and the sexual tension in the car was at an all time high. Andrew parked his car on the street just outside her flat, and the two of them walked up together.

“You’ve changed some stuff…” Andrew commented, taking note of how adult and how put-together everything was. All the art she’d once had leaning against the wall on the floor was now hung, and her books shelves were organized and she had her little kettle on the oven, and all the things he remembered so clearly were all in their little place.

“It’s been two years” Bianca murmured quietly, glancing at him as she headed for the stairs to her lofted bedroom. Andrew followed her slowly, his feet shuffling hard and heavy on the steps. He watched her legs in front of him, the way her dress shifted and caught on her tights. His fingers itched, his lips still aching…

When he reached the top, she was stood in the middle of the darkened room, her tiny bedside lamp providing a dim glow behind her. She was waiting for him, and it took Andrew a stride and a half to reach her, the two of them melting into one another.

“Andrew…” Bianca whispered, the ache in her voice sounding equally as desperate as he felt. 

He took her face in his hands, admiring her for what seemed like the longest moment in history, until he finally touched his lips to hers. It was soft and sensual… a gentleness in Andrew that she didn’t think he possessed any more.

Andrew groaned into her mouth, the sweetness of her lips a taste he hadn’t realized he’d missed so much. He’d forgotten; forgotten what she felt like, what she sounded like, the way her lips moved against his. And like a silent agreement had been made, they began stripping one another out of their clothes, pulling back to assist, and giggling a little when something stuck or someone had trouble with a tricky zipper. 

That was Andrew. 

His fingers trembled so hard when she’d turned in his arms to reveal the long silver zipper down her back, that he got stuck and nearly gave up, “Why can’t it just happen like in the films?” he muttered a bit defeated, and Bianca faced him once more, a teasing little smile on her lips.

“It’s alright, look” she grabbed the hem and pulled the whole thing over her head, leaving her standing there in her bra and tights.

Andrew swallowed hard, feeling strangely like he was reliving their first time together all over again, “Well, that works.” 

She bit her lip as he advanced on her, kicking off his boots and pushing his jeans further down his hips. He wrapped his arm around her back, and helped her lay back as gently as possible, resting his knee on the bed for leverage. Bianca’s body hummed, her skin dotted with goosebumps as she watched him crawl over her. It felt like a dream and she felt like crying, but she didn’t, she couldn’t because he was really here. And she’d keep repeating it to herself as long as she had to.

Andrew took his time. 

He let his lips and his hands explore, rediscovering her body and all the things he’d fallen in love with and was forced to walk away from. Andrew’s fingers tickled the sides of her breasts and down the flanks of her body while his lips whispered kisses down her sternum, grinning at the way she sucked in her stomach. He hooked his fingers inside the waistband of her tights, the pattern still unclear to him, and he sat back, inching them down her legs. She lifted them, helping to kick them off, and when he tossed them aside, he sat there, his gorgeous muddy eyes raking over her body.

“You should take those off” Bianca whispered leaning up on her elbows. She was completely naked and he was still in his boxer-briefs; soft grey ones that left very little to the imagination. 

“Alright… em, yeah…” Andrew said thickly, his deep voice echoing through the loft.

Bianca shook at the sound. Andrew stood up, prepared to just yank them off and kick them aside and be over and done with it. But Bianca was already inching towards the edge of the bed.

“I wanna do it…” she whispered, like maybe she was afraid to say the actual words aloud. She slid her legs over the side of the bed and Andrew stepped in between them, shivering at her fingers as they brushed against his thighs.

Her eyes followed her hand as it crept across the front of him, her fingertips only a little hesitant as they stroked him slowly through his briefs.

Andrew groaned low in his throat, almost growling at the feeling. He was throbbing hot and thick and ready for her, and the touch of her hand on him could’ve easily tipped him over the edge. But this wasn’t the first time, and he was much more prepared. He watched her as she stroked him, fascinated by him and what she knew was waiting on just the other side of that heather grey material.

Bianca wasn’t going to get into all that just now, but her throat felt tight at the idea of doing it later. Instead, she just leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his stomach just below his navel as her fingers dragged his briefs over the curve of his ass and down his legs. She could feel his cock brush against her when she freed it, and her body was suddenly on fire, remembering how good he’d once felt inside her. 

Andrew watched her as she sat on the bed again, inching backwards, radiant in the dim room, like a beacon; a blazing bright signal he’d been chasing on somewhat of a misguided course for far too long. His stomach had been knotted up and anxious up until this point, but now, as he crawled back over her again, covering her mouth in another deep kiss, he felt at ease. Like he was exactly where he was supposed to be.

Andrew pushed himself inside her, the moan in his throat catching as he sank into her. Bianca whimpered a bit strangled, and Andrew searched her face with concern in his eyes.

“Are you alright, Bianca?” He whispered, holding himself steady on his forearms. 

Bianca placed her hands on his cheeks, and nodded, “I just forgot…” she whispered back shyly.

“Forgot what?”

A pretty shade of pink crept up her neck to her cheek, “How good you felt.”

“Oh…” Andrew laughed softly, bowing his head a bit embarrassed but he didn’t know why. He shifted a little and Bianca moaned again, “What?”

“Andrew…” Bianca sighed, “I’m okay. I just… you can keep going. I promise I won’t break.”

He didn’t have to be told twice, he began moving his hips into her, sliding in and out so easily. She felt like a dream, like a dream he had so many nights before. It took him a moment to get into a groove, but when he did, Bianca melted into the bed, her leg wrapping around his calf as he thrust into her. 

“Oh baby…” he whispered against her ear when he felt her arch her back and meet him halfway. 

Bianca moaned with each movement, her head fuzzy and clouded, lost in the feel of his hot skin, flush and sweaty and sticky as he moved against her. He felt so good inside her and she squeezed around him, making him groan. He pulled out almost completely, teasing her before he thrust back in and Bianca cried out. He kept doing it, loving the way she sounded when she moaned his name, begging for more.

Andrew sat up on his knees, lifting her hips and watched himself as he disappeared in and out of her. He brushed his fingers down her stomach to her abdomen, his thumb slipping down and pressing against her clit. She moaned, her palms reaching up and planting firmly against her headboard, feeling her stomach and back sweating as she held her hips up for him. Her flat was hot, especially in the loft, and the two of them were glistening with sweat in the soft amber light.

He couldn’t take his eyes off her, admiring her and all the pretty shapes her body made as she moved against him. The way her soft pink lips parted and the way her eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks, the spots of red that covered her neck down her chest as the sweat and heat became too much. He leaned forward, kissing her just under her breasts, and then up the middle to her neck, where he kissed her wetly, his nose brushing along her jaw.

“Mmm… c’mere Bianca…” he sighed, his voice thick with lust and emotion, his arms winding around her back.

He lifted her up until she was sitting in his lap, his cock still deep inside her. She wrapped her legs around his back when he got settled, her arms around his neck. He kissed her face all over; her eyelids, her cute little nose, her soft cheeks. His fingers sunk deep into her hips, and he lifted them so she was hovering for just a moment, until he pulled her down hard onto his cock. The both of them groaning as he filled her up again.

“Andrew…” she breathed, beginning to grind her hips into him, riding him, their bodies pressed so tight together. 

He held her against him, his fingers splayed across her back as they moved together. He helped grind her into him, guiding her, speeding up the pace to get her going an slowing it down when he thought he might cum too soon. Andrew had experienced a lot of good nights in the last year or so, most of them on stage performing for thousands of people, but none of them felt quite like this. He was lost in the girl he’d been in love with since he was twenty; the very girl that had most likely been the cause of every single breakup he ever had. He’d never told Bianca this, but… she was the only one. She always had been.

Bianca let Andrew move her, and she ran her fingers through her hair, breathing heavily as she writhed in his lap. Andrew hadn’t taken his big muddy eyes off her for a moment, and a smile curled up on her lips as she leaned forward to kiss him. 

“I’m so happy you’re here” she mumbled, catching his bottom lip between her teeth and pulling away slowly. Andrew slowed his pace when her fingers slipped through his hair just above his ears, and he felt like crying. There were so many emotions coursing through his veins, his body humming, his mind completely lucid for once. He knew what he wanted. He’d wanted it for so long, and he hadn’t known how to make it work, but he knew he could now.

“I love you” Andrew told her carefully, making sure she knew from the sound of his voice, that this wasn’t something that had just occurred to him in the heat of the moment. 

Bianca’s features softened, and she stopped moving, tilting her head as she gazed at him, “You love me?”

Andrew nodded slowly, his brows furrowed as he watched the way her expressions changed, the way the colors in her eyes melted, the pretty amber dissolving into the the mahogany like whiskey, “I’m not just saying it… because…” he gestured down between them, “I think… em, I think I’ve always known… but… em, it weren’t ever the right time… but…”

“Andrew, I’ve loved you since the moment I met you” Bianca interjected, her voice raw and overcome with emotion. 

Andrew’s eyes widened, glassy and tingly when he saw the tears in hers, “Let’s not cry, alright?” He laughed, brushing the first tear he saw trickle down her face, “I’m never going anywhere ever again. I’ve belonged to you since that first night.” 

Bianca covered her face with her hands, willing herself to stop the tears from falling; but this was all she’d ever wanted. Years of pining for him, and he’d loved her all along.

“D’you know… that first Christmas… I, em, I didn’t shut up about you the whole ride back to my folks house?” 

Bianca was laughing into her hands and Andrew tilted his head, pulling them away. Her nose was a little red, and he cupped her face in his hands, loving the way she fit so perfect, “Really?” She whispered, angry at herself for falling apart during such an important moment.

“Yeah… the other guys told me they couldn’t wait for me to pass out. Then when we went on tour, and I must’ve talked about you for few months straight” Andrew grinned fondly at the memory. 

She smiled, blinking the tears from her eyes, and falling against his chest. She pressed her lips to his neck, kissing him softly. 

Andrew rubbed his hands up and down her back, “I’ve always loved you, Bianca.”