#I heard that back home there was hooting and cheering in the theatres during this interval scene

[pariaritzia]

-She's valorous!

Aishwarya Lekshmi in GATTA KUSTHI (2022)

[twenty6magazine]

London At Christmas TWENTY6 things to do and buy this festive season......

London was the home of Dickens, so while in celebration of the birth of a baby some distance away (Bethlehem) many of the traditions we now enjoy were invented and entrenched in 19th Century London. Mr Scrooge awoke on Christmas morning to discover the joys of Christmas so join us on our London journey and let’s “Party like it’s 1899!!!” NOT TO MISS …… on every Wednesday on the run up to Christmas Columbia Road Flower Market opens up for mulled wine and Carols …  all the independent shops are open late and mulled wine is available on every corner.  Follow the old Joanna (piano) on the barrow up the street and sing-along with the Christmas Carols lead by local Vicar Adam Atkinson, raising money for local charities whilst offering up a real slice of the old East End.  What a Cockney “knees up” “ding-dong sing along”……. “All that glitters is not gold” but for the most brilliant festive glitter head to Marks and Spencers and grab a bottle of their Clementine Gin Snow Globe. Twenty6 Christmas Cocktail Recipe” ….. 20% Clementine Gin, 10% Grand Marnier, 50% Prosecco, 20% Soda Water Sparkle and luxury can be found in the fabulous Burlington Arcade. It’s the perfect Christmas cut-through from Bond Street to Piccadilly. Perfectly placed between Cartier and Fortnum & Mason, this has so much glamour. Celebrating its 200th Anniversary, having opened in March 1819, luxury leather goods, cashmere, new and antique jewelry, this is real old time elegance, and do drop into Laduree for your macaroons, a hair cut at  Atkinsons or a shoe shine. Enter one end and pop out the other polished, buffed and groomed. “Hark the Herald Angels Sing” and other Carols ….  Enjoy a service in one of the historical Abbey’s or Cathedrals this Christmas. Many hold services to raise funds for homeless charities.  Check with each one to see what and when their services are. Visit the Antiques Market at the historic Spitalfields’ Market.  Held every Thursday during the year, there remains a very 19th Century feel to this market. Find something totally unique; everything from an 18th Century teapot from Andrew Coram or pre-owned Dior Earrings….. it’s a wonderful place to wander and soak up the atmosphere whilst “hooking a bargain”. Take time to write to those you see seldom, an actual card cannot be replaced by any digital alternative, spend an afternoon catching up with old friends, its so worth the investment, any post these days that’s not a bill is such a pleasure. Charity cards available widely from many outlets. “We Three Kings of Orient Are”; we don’t expect you travel to the Orient but the Kings Road hosts its own Christmas Bazaar on the 7th December, horse carriage rides and chestnuts roasting bring festive cheer to this very glamorous corner of town. Afternoon tea is a tradition not to be forgotten at this time of year, a real treat, all the fine hotels do fabulous afternoon teas; The Ritz,  Claridge’s  and if you need a venue where doggy friends are welcome, book the wonderful drawing room at The Lanesborough, ….. for afternoon tea  (or champagne), assorted sandwiches and an irresistible selection of cakes, the diet starts in January …….

Is Santa coming down your Chimney? We love Santa visiting, but also it’s fabulous to make sure he visits your nearest and dearest. Scented candles that make your home feel luxurious, “Jo Loves’ Christmas Candle” is the very essence of Christmas, with fresh pine, wood smoke and a hint of plum pudding. YUM. Oh and don’t forget to re-purpose the holder next year into a bulb holder for your Christmas hyacinths. The White Company has also captured the scent of Christmas, try either the Old Fashioned with a smooth mix of zest of orange and amber whiskey, warm and familiar; or their Classic Winter Warmer with spices of cinnamon, clove and orange. It’s like Santa just left the room…… Personalised presents are always extra special. It’s fabulous to get your bedding all up close and personal with Stranos Linen of London, pillow cases or full sets, pure luxury just for the ones you love, rest your head everyday on love and luxury. Something not just for the 12 days of Christmas but 365 days of the year.

We love stationery, “Thank you notes” (always so handy to write to say thank you for your wonderful Christmas prezzies) personalised notelets, or for the most traditional among us a set of writing paper and envelopes.  Useful, beautiful and personal. Win win win. Check out Smythson or Wren Press . Everyone wants to smell nice……. So many options but so very personal, it’s a minefield choosing fragrances.  I personally love the joyful experience of entering and inhaling the perfumed interior of Floris in Jermyn Street, W1, with its gorgeous interior as exhibited at the 1851 Exhibition.  Santa Maria Novella, 117 Walton Street, SW3, or the Piccadilly Arcade  it’s like shopping in the 19th Century, huge range of scents and lotions, the pomegranate terracotta room diffuser, literally lasts for years…. Pure class. Make your own Christmas wreath. I’m never one to take work away from a good florist, but a wreath making course with a few chums is a real hoot and you take away something to show off to your neighbours;  a really fun few hours and once you know how it’s a gift that comes in handy year on year……. There are courses at Fortnum and Masons, Petersham Nurseries and Columbia Creative. Prices from £50 I am a huge fan of the Christmas Shopping Trip. A genuine trip to shop and not just clicking and collecting. This gives you the chance to enjoy the festive lights and experience a wander, make this Christmas old fashioned and take a day to shop with your best friend(s). Our Historic Christmas route to take in the lights, smells and tastes of Christmas. Stroll around St Christophers Place, South Molton Street, Old Bond Street, Burlington Arcade, Piccadilly Arcade. You will cover everything from Selfridges, Fortnum and Mason, the perfumers mentioned above, plus many more… For the perfect pit-stop and refuel, try Franco’s in Jermyn Street. It’s perfectly placed in the epicenter of the shopping district. Literally the best lasagna in London. Its classical elegance is like a step back in time; it’s the perfect spot on your Christmas shopping day out, perfect for lunch, early supper or a night out (BOOK!) 13th December is “Save the Children Christmas Jumper Day”. Wear your jumper with pride and give generously click here! Pantos and HO HO HO…. There are many options of live shows, Sandi Toksvig is hosting a Carol Sing A-long at the Globe theatre;  the Christmas Tree in St Paul’s Cathedral, is illuminated on the 22nd December, and for the off beat check out Wiltons Music Hall, or the Hackney Empire for their festive fare. Check on line what’s on. Chelsea Christmas Lights Switch on is the 23rd of November, Christmas with illuminated Sloane Square, Sloane Street and Duke of York’s Square. Celebrations start at 2pm in Sloane Square with Carols and entertainment, with the lights to be turned on at 5pm. Christmas Candlelit suppers... Petersham Nurseries are running a number of lovely evenings,  6th, 12th, 19th and 20th December.  Reservations on 0208 332 8665. Amazing atmosphere and wonderful food. Also take a peek at the Christmas decorations…… Don’t break a leg, but take a spin around the skating rinks that pop up, Somerset House, The Natural History Museum, Hampton Court Palace,  wonderful surrounds…. Have go or just have a drink and watch. Its My Birthday - just saying……… Have a wonderful Festive Season, eat drink and be Merry……. And in the famous last lines of “Twas the Night Before Christmas” ….. “But I heard him exclaim as he drove out of sight”, “Happy to Christmas to All and to All a good night”. Words by Andrew Downs

[birdsofchristmas]

Chapter 6: The Swinging Christmas Tree

The oddest thing about most of the Christmas TV specials I watched growing up was that almost everything talked- animals talked, people talked, snowmen, ornaments, trees, toys, squirrels - everything seemed to have an opinion on Christmas and a desire to express it verbally.

It makes sense then that when my parents told me we were going to a singing Christmas tree I thought they were talking about an actual tree that danced and sang. For days I pictured an anthropomorphic green giant with sticks as arms, standing gleefully singing holiday tunes. My imagination even stretched into scenarios where the tree became disgruntled from years of imprisonment, breaking free of the 4-peg metal stand holding it in place then terrorizing the horrified audience of mostly attractive young parents.

I was in awe of the thing when I first beheld it at age 8, but even before the singers were ushered into its branches I was sitting in the padded seats of the church thinking “what’s it going to look like when it starts dancing?”

I learned that night that the term “singing Christmas tree” is a complete misnomer. For those who have never seen one the singing tree is a large choir performance of holiday tunes accompanied by some kind of live theatre performance. Actors, a running plotline, props and scenes, the whole lot.

The tree itself is a series of podiums stacked one by one, the widest at the base with gradually narrowing levels ascending to the ceiling of the church, decorated with all manner of lights and green fabric. The choir would be lined in rows with 20 on the first layer and less as the tree progressed higher, with a few lucky individuals perched on the very top level.

It became a family tradition to see the tree every year, and as the years progressed my interests shifted from cap guns and action figures to music and performing, and so my appreciation for the performances of the tree deepened with each attendance, extending even to my first Christmas returning home from college.

You might be balking at the idea that a giant plywood tree with choir singers would have any mass appeal, but these things are wildly popular. One church in Vancouver sees around 20,000 attendees over the course of six evenings every year, with reserved seats disappearing faster than Backstreet Boys tickets in the 90s!

It wasn’t like trying to see a Tyler Perry movie in theatres- if you didn’t show up on time seating would be highly scarce, and being that my family was never the type to be in a hurry finding a good spot was always a bit of a crap shoot.  Quite often we’d show up minutes before the curtain call and have to be seated in various single chairs throughout the church, only seeing each other again after the performance.

This year was different because I insisted on driving, and because I lied about what time the show actually started. “6:30,” I shouted throughout the house to my parents, “It starts at 6:30! We can’t be late!” We’d leave the house at 6:38 and arrive at the church by 7pm, well ahead of the the 7:30 start time.

When it came to picking seats my parents were the most indecisive people you could ever imagine, regularly shifting seats at Nanaimo Clippers hockey games and even during movies, sometimes after the movie started! Hockey games are fair enough, but playing musical chairs during a movie was just terrible. I was always more of a settler than a nomad, content to find a good seat and sit comfortably without the anxious thought there there was always a better seat out there somewhere.

My parents started their 2 Stooges routine as soon as we arrived at the church, with “Oh, we’re really on time” and “oh, where should we sit? The balcony? I don’t want to sit too close to the stage, no not here, over there”, but I wasn’t having any of it. I strode with bold confidence into the foyer, stopping only to receive a program being passed out by the ushers, right into the auditorium, down the aisle sitting down almost immediately into the first decent enough looking seat I could find.

Twenty minutes later the director of the play approached a microphone to give his opening welcome. It was at this point I started to casually flip through the program, stopping in my reading tracks when I saw a statement in bold lettering that said “please note, there will not be an intermission for this performance”. In my rush to get a good seat I’d forgotten the golden rule of seeing plays and movies- always go to the bathroom before you sit down.

Another twenty minutes later minutes nature started calling, and calling very loudly, and I started to regret the venti peppermint latte I’d picked up on the way. The choir was singing beautifully, the acting was engaging, but I was too distracted to fully enjoy the show. At one point I looked down at the empty coffee cup sitting on the ground in front of me, thought about it for a second, then said to myself, “no, that’s a really bad idea, I should just get up”.

I shuffled down the pew awkwardly and proceeded to the exit in search of a restroom. I couldn’t see it anywhere and walked almost the entire perimeter of the foyer until I spotted a small restroom sign. When I was leaving the restroom I noticed another sign in an adjacent hallway. It had an arrow pointing left and it said “choir members, this way”.

I have to admit most of my bucket list has something to do with Christmas- celebrating the holiday in Australia for instance, or driving a Shriner car through the Santa Claus parade, or building a life sized edible gingerbread house, or proposing to my future wife by wrapping myself in a giant box with a bow, then jumping out with a ring proclaiming “marrying you is the best gift I could ever ask for babe!”

As I stood in front of the arrowed sign I felt it was a golden opportunity to cross “singing in a giant Christmas tree” off my list, and I’d be a fool to pass it up.

I followed the sign to another sign at the end of the hall, then down another another hall like a mouse in a maze. I was surprised a security guard or a spinster hasn’t stopped me at this point. You know these people, there’s a few in every church- they’re the self appointed vigilantes and guardians who adhere strictly to the rules and expect others to do so as well. If you look slightly out of place they’ll stop you and ask “excuse me sir, can I help you?” I’m always tempted to reply with “why yes, you can! I need a ride to the airport next week, would you mind driving me??”

At last I scurried though a tall purple curtain with another sign that said “performers entrance” into a room strewn about with jackets and purses and a rolling clothes rack full of empty wire hangers. At the very end of the rack there was a long, green sparkled gown I recognized as one of the choir uniforms.  

It was an awkward fit at first, and it smelled like hadn’t been washed since Christmas 1998, but I managed to get the robe on. There was a tag on the neck that said XXXL and a zipper on the back with a long string attached to it, which I assumed was an emergency escape cord in case of a fire or an earthquake. I took 2 steps and immediately stumbled, tripping on the excess fabric. It felt like I was wearing an open parachute. As I fumbled about I sang a quick vocal warm up, “Maaaaaaaaaahh, maaaaaaaaaay, meeeeeeee, muuuuuuust be santaaaaa…”

The entrance to the tree was an obvious arched entryway, beside that a final and definitive sign- “the Lord bless and keep you” with a diagram of the tree. I searched the sign until I found “Baritones: third level” and made my way into the tree’s hallowed plywood branches.

The choir was mid-song as I shimmied onto the platform, bumping into a guy who was as tall as me but about 100 pounds bigger. He looked like he’d make a great Santa in about 20 years time if his career in the CFL didn’t pan out. I whispered to him “sorry I’m late, I forgot my sheet music.” He whispered back in the lowest bass tone I’ve ever heard “s'ok, borrow mine”.

The thing I wasn’t expecting was the lights- red lights, yellow lights, green lights, lights beaming in my eyes hiding the audience from view, lights beaming from the ceiling and from the stage floor.

There were even spotlights on all sections of the choir as individuals took turns preforming solos. I sang happily through three carols, partway through the 4th I heard the low voice next to me say “bub, your parts next”. I froze with fear and looked around nervously, then I noticed there was a tiny black bauble on a long black string a mere foot in front of where I was standing. With the realization this was a microphone came the realization that my voice was going to heard well and clearly by every member in the audience!

When I thought about sneaking into a singing Christmas tree I was expecting to be just a single needle in the tree, unnoticed as an individual. I thought maybe I’d blend in, and if I was off key no-one would really notice. But now I was about to become an entire branch, to be tested by the mighty winds of high expectation to see if I could stand up to the pressure.

The spotlight hit me and I belted out the solo, giving it my best with gusto, summoning courage usually only possible after a double gin & tonic. Then I heard a giant applause with hooting and whistling from one corner of the church. The Pentecostal youth group I’d volunteered with for 5 years before leaving for college was attending in almost full force, taking up an entire section! They recognized me and cheered me on in full Pentecostal fashion, laughing and buzzing long after my solo. I imagine part of their excitement may have been them thinking I was speaking in tongues, because I only knew half the words to the solo.

I stayed on for the rest of the performance, by the end sweating profusely but filled with unimaginable joy. I didn’t stay in the tree for the standing ovation, instead sneaking back through the mouse maze hearing the cheering reverberate throughout the church before returning to my seat. I sat down as the ovation continued and breathed a sigh of relief. I’d gotten away with sneaking into the tree and besides my former youth group the crowd was none the wiser.

It was then I felt a hand on my shoulder, a grip so firm I knew it could only have belonged to a police officer. I felt the same grip one year at my old high school when I was setting off fireworks in the back field. The same grip I felt on my arm after jumping into the outdoor pool in Bowen Park late at night. The same grip I felt on my shoulder when I was caught sneaking into the walk in freezer at summer camp trying to steal ice cream. The jig was up, there was a security guard after all, and I’d been caught!

I turned around and to my surprise the grip belonged to a sweet elderly woman, with glittering eyes and a cheerful smile. I leaned down towards her and she said in a kind sounding voice “my that was very well done, thank you very much”. She had recognized me from the choir because I was still wearing the giant parachute choir robe, and I responded with a very embarrassed “thank you so much”, turning as red as a Christmas poinsettia. Her grandson, and more importantly her granddaughter, were smiling at me as well saying “yeah that was great, thanks”. This was followed by more undeserved thanks from several other grandmothers and their granddaughters while I inched towards the foyer doors.

I thought I was finally in the clear when I heard a shout from the stage, as one of the members of the choir said “Hey, aren’t you coming to the afterparty?” My parents were standing at the front door holding their coats. I put my hands up in an “I dunno” position. My dad nodded at me with a smile, winked at me, and off my parents left for home while I walked down to aisle, back to the stage, through the mouse maze, to the after party happening in the church’s library with a stack of pizza boxes in the shape of a Christmas tree.

One of the choir members approached me saying, “I don’t recognize you from practice, were you part of the tree?” And the guy with the bass voice came over and said “hey of course he was, this is Daniel, he was filling in for Mike!”

And so for the remainder of the night I was Daniel, and I was Daniel again for the following three years of returning to sing in the Christmas tree. The third year I sang on the very top level, which only lasted a few songs because I’m afraid of heights. I’ve been singing on the 2nd level ever since.