#I have problems with gen 8 I have so many problems I had to rewrite this because I was going on even more tangents than you see here.
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Inconspicuous mustache and glasses on, soooo you wanna talk about how galar could be good huh?
Points at you this is all your fucking fault (/j)
Anyways you’ve poked me so I’m going to talk about it now. Sorry not sorry.
Before I say anything: “Moth, Tinker, don’t like, all your characters live in galar?” Yes! Because when you’re making an au for Pokémon why make a region out of scratch, when Game Freak’s left a perfectly good blank slate for you right there?
Anyways with that out of the way, I’m putting this under a cut because this is going to be long.
Sword and shield are such disappointing games. You could say a million things about it— the graphics, the routes, the nat dex cut, so on and so forth, but that’s a long dead horse and im not going to start beating it.
I like Sw/Sh’s story. Or, more accurately I like the idea of the story that the games tried and failed to give us. I really want to say there’s something there to grasp at, but honestly? There’s not. Nothing burger ass game.
The plot up until the climax of the story is “The darkest day was a thing and there was a hero that stopped it. Bede’s mean and wants wishing stars. Wait, what?! There’s two heroes? And badass dogs? No way!”
It genuinely feels like they had a full story arc with plot beats written out, but had to scratch everything besides the climax and try to fill in the gaping plot holes as quickly as they could before they hit the deadline for release. It’s so jarring and bizarre when you reach the climax of the story, because it’s just… out of nowhere? You and Hop try to break into the Macro Cosmos tower to interrupt Leon’s meeting because he was… late for dinner? And Oleana hears this and starts acting like an unhinged evil antagonist out of nowhere, even though at the moment not letting you in is just, perfectly logical?
And then the whole hide and seek game she does for the keys— Team Yell joining in, none of this feels deserved at all, probably because there was, I don’t know, supposed to be things happening before this that properly built up to it?
It’s so frustrating, because if they had even executed the story at all, it would’ve been so cool. The guy who practically MADE galar is re-awakening what is basically an eldritch god in a misguided attempt to save the region from future disaster (trauma? Paranoia? All of the above?) but his plan backfires and nearly destroys everything instead??? It’s such a cool idea! And it’s just. Barely even executed at all.
Oleana and Rose both could’ve been such interesting characters. Their Pokémon teams are symbolic of themselves as people, for crying out loud! Imagine how cool those fights, especially Oleana’s, could’ve been if there had been a proper fucking storyline??
(I won’t go too in-depth, but Oleana using beautiful and feminine Pokémon up until her g-max garbador ace— a literal heaping pile of trash? And how that represents the her horrible personality hidden behind her appearance?
And how Rose’s team is made up of thorn and thorn-like Pokémon, as well as industrial Pokémon and his childhood starter? Without a rose in sight? He’s lost who he was to the pursuit of innovation or something. There’s no Rose anymore, only the thorns. Too bad there’s nothing before these moments.)
It ends up just feeling like a barely even executed dollar store version of Sun and Moon. You’ve got the punk evil team who isn’t actually evil, the altruistic company/foundation that turns out to be far worse than the evil team, extraterrestrial pokemon who are very debatably Pokémon being brought into the world and causing problems? Yeah everything screams “we tried to recreate the s/m formula,” down to Hop using Hau’s animations. Insane.
(Also team yell feels like another dead horse that I don’t want to beat— but they don’t work like Team Skull did. Team skull worked! Really well in my opinion! Meanwhile Team Yell is just… kind of a vague nuisance. I get that was the point, but if Macro Cosmos was going to be the villains— why not give any buildup beforehand? Oh well. I said I wouldn’t beat the dead horse.)
Tl;dr: Sword and shield is barely even trash, it’s an empty dumpster with some unopened cans in it and I am sitting in there playing with the cans trying to create a coherent story out of it. Man galar’s good if only it was good. Go watch Twilight wings it’s Galar if it was good
And also sw/sh feels uncannily like bootleg sun and moon, bri’ish edition.
#asks#tinkerscrickets#shoutout to anyone worldbuilding for galar o7 stay strong out there. I wish there was literally any substance#I have problems with gen 8 I have so many problems I had to rewrite this because I was going on even more tangents than you see here.#it was scary#anyways the Pokémon irl versions of our ocs are only loosely based on that au I mentioned#because the actual au is so far divorced from anything gen 8 that it’d be impossible for us to share#and impossible for anyone to reasonably interact with. the original gym leaders don’t even exist that’s how bad it is#also it’s important to note that I have never played the DLCs and I refuse to ever consider playing them#I already didn’t enjoy the main game why would spend money for more of the game I don’t like
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twenty questions for fic writers!
Thank you for the tag @sunriseverse! Always love doing these
how many works do you have on ao3?
As of right now, 284. 154 of those are Killer and Healer fics, to the surprise of nobody
2. what's your total ao3 word count?
We are currently at 3,030,755. I tend to write long oneshots and decently long multichapters so I'm not surprised my word count is as high as it is. Again, majority of these words come from Killer and Healer because there is just something about them that makes my brain go brrr
3. what fandoms do you write for?
Most Killer and Healer at this point, but sometimes I'll write an S.C.I. fic and I'm also going to dip my toes into F1 rpf. Currently working on my first fic now
4. top five fics by kudos
I agree with Corset, I'm not a fan of the kudos for my overall (since they're fics I don't care about and since I'm not in those fandoms anymore), so I'm also gonna go with my kudos from 2024 恨君不似江楼月 | Killer and Healer 231 kudos, m, WIP, yuezhi, junchun 药剂师日记 | The Apothecary Diaries 111 kudos, t, 89k, yuezhi Oil and Water 105 kudos, m, 91.5k, eric/ryan Stay the Night By My Side 48 kudos, t, 1096, qiubing Big White Cat Cuddles 47 kudos, gen, 2.7k
5. do you respond to comments?
Always. Always, always, always
6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
On the rare as fuck occasion that i've actually writing MCD, my fic Promise to Keep for Chinese Paladin 4. I too am shocked that I wrote MCD because I normally write happy endings, but I was actually okay with how canon ended so...I was fine with the MCD (cried like a bitch while writing it tho)
7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
All of my fics minus Promise to Keep
8. do you get hate on fics?
Oh, I did once...and it turned into a whole post that I made on here because if they had gone just after the fic/me, I would have just deleted it and moved on (while simmering with rage) but no, they went after my readers and insulted them and NO ONE goes after my readers
9. do you write smut?
No I do not. Never have, never will. It squicks me, so I don't. I can read it, can't write it
10. craziest crossover?
Eh...I did a big crossover back in 2020 between s.c.i, history 3: trapped, and guardian. That fic was fun
11. have you ever had a fic stolen?
Yeah, back in 2020 when I was working on my fic The Untamed Moments, someone was copying it word for fucking word over on Wattpad in Spanish. One of my readers at the time noticed it and I shut that shit down real quick. So...word to the wise. Don't steal my fics or I will end you
12. have you ever had a fic translated?
I have! My fic So This Is What Love Feels Like was translated to Vietnamese. I was very honored
13. have you ever co-written a fic before?
In the past...wouldn't do it again. I like brainstorming fics with people but at the end of the day, I need to be the one writing the fic. And my style is so different from others that you could definitely tell if a fic was co-written
14. all time favorite ship?
Yuezhi. Hands down. But man, Lestappen is getting up there...
15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
God permitting, the Killer and Healer rewrite. Same with my Kei x Yaku fic. Problem is, I keep getting distracted by other wips and ideas so I like...haven't gotten around to finishing them. The rewrite I know is going to take me a while, but the Kei x Yaku fic I just gotta sit down and work on/crank out or I'll lose my hyperfixation with it and want to either abandon it or delete it. And I don't want to do either, so I gotta get back into it
16. what are your writing strengths?
Dialogue/making characters still feel in character, no matter the au, if that makes sense. I've been told my dialogue is great
17. what are your writing weaknesses?
TOO MANY GOD DAMN WIPS/WIP IDEAS
18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?
I will only ever use dialogue in another language if I know what I'm writing in another language. Things might also cross over, like "hyung" or "gege" or stuff like that because it just sounds better but other than that, I don't use dialogue in another language unless i'm 100% sure of the meaning
19. first fandom you wrote in?
Dragonball
20. favorite fic you've written?
How dare you...I love all of my fics, even the ones for the fandoms I'm no longer a part of. No, I won't choose. You can't make me
Tagging: @hyperbolicgrinch @theotherwhybietoldmeso @clawbehavior @fourth-quartet and any other writing mutual who wants to give this a go
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Fanfiction Writer Questions!
Was tagged by the very lovely @optiwashere some time ago, and I've only just had the chance to sit down and take a crack at this!
Not gonna tag anybody, but if you read this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!
(Also this is talking about a lot of fics that I've written but not published because well... that's just how it's been lmao...
1. How many works do you have on AO3?
13 at the moment. I’ve deleted a few things that I’m not entirely proud of/works that I’m planning on rewriting and improving upon.
2. What's your total AO3 word count?
26,031 (my WIP folder has almost 100k words, if we want any comparison)
3. What fandoms do you write for?
Mainly Dragon Age! Although AO3 is misleading… I’ve only got 7 fics on there for Dragon Age. But these don’t include the ones I’ve deleted and also the literal hundreds of WIP documents in my writing folder. It’s become quite a problem. I’ve also been writing for Baldur’s Gate 3 a bit more recently, but those fics are on hold because of lack of time/motivation/the fact I’ve not finished the game yet and want to do my research and understand characterisation and plot better.
4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
1. a lesson in grief (T-rated, Vi/Caitlyn from Arcane) 2. slip away (G-rated Gen-fic from Hades 2020) 3. Names (G-rated Fenris/Female Hawke from Dragon Age) 4. Anxious Grief (T-rated, Cassandra Pentaghast/Male Cadash from Dragon Age) 5. Fear and Forgiveness (G-rated, Dorian Pavus/Male Adaar from Dragon Age)
5. Do you respond to comments?
I try to! Every single comment I get is like fuel to my brain so I love and appreciate each one!
6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?
I think I did toy around with a fic where I left Hawke in the Fade. The process of getting into Fenris’ headspace during that was way too painful for me to continue.
7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?
Most of my fics tend towards happy endings, even if they pack a lot of angst in the body of em. Of the ones I’ve got published, I’d say Names.
8. Do you get hate on fics?
I haven’t, but then again I post so rarely and sporadically so people forget I even exist huhu.
9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?
… Yes… (and that’s all im gonna say)
10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?
I’ve not written crossovers per se, I’m more of an AU kinda guy. Though there’s definitely an ancient story I wrote back when I was like 13 that had like, every single bit of media I’d ever loved merged into one, and the excuse was that I’d just read His Dark Materials and wanted my own universe where everything I loved existed at once. COMPLETELY self-indulgent shit.
11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?
Not as far as I know…
12. Have you ever had a fic translated?
Nope! At least not that I know of.
13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?
Again no… I’ve not done a lot of stuff huhu!
14. What's your all-time favorite ship?
It’s the one and only. The girls that live rent free in my head. The girls that deserve everything. (It’s Josephine Montilyet/my Inquisitor from Dragon Age Inquisition)
15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?
It’s the Dragon Age Inquisition rewrite I’ve been complaining about for the longest time. It’s become the pet project I keep poking at whenever I have the energy to. All my Tashak/Josephine fics are set within this, and honestly at this point, instead of making one large fic, I might as well just post the disjointed chapters separately even if they don’t make sense. I’ve got WIPs in the folder from 2016. It’s out of control.
16. What are your writing strengths?
I’d like to think I’m good at descriptive writing, at drawing the reader into the scene and pulling them along with the story.
17. What are your writing weaknesses?
I’m so bad at dialogue it’s not even funny. Also, my writing can tend towards too much rambling – I guess that’s just because it’s the way my brain works.
18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?
The only other language I’m fluent in is Malay, and I really can’t imagine myself writing in that unless in very specific circumstances.
19. First fandom you wrote for?
Dang, I think it was probably for BIONICLE. Way back when I was like, in secondary school.
20. Favorite fic you've written?
Published? Names. There’s stuff in there I still feel jealous of, even today. Unpublished – a bunch of stuff for Aforementioned Dragon Age Rewrite. I should really post stuff from there at some point LMAO…
#meera talks#my writing#WAHOO ive been in a good mood and sorting out my writing folders...... its been getting me excited to publish stuff again#whether or not if happens.... we'll see!
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febuary seventh (i’m seeing you)
Y/n and Spencer's relationship collide around a single day: the one where they first looked into each others eyes.
[Or, the all of the secret love letters they wrote during the beginning of their relationship]
Word count: (part one and two) 9.2k
Relationship: Spencer Reid x GN! Reader
Warnings: Language, dub-con (pool kiss scene is depicted as something that made Spencer uncomfy), vulgar language, allusion to Spencer for a moment being horny
Rating: Gen audiences
A/N: All of these letters are rewrites of ones I got from someone, as well as rewrites of ones I gave them. Reader is GN and AFAB but a trans masc reader was more in mind (the French bits)
Part One
Y/n L/n— Jan 15 (2008) 11:31
Not sure if you'll ever read this but, je suis amoureux de toi. I love you, so much. It’s almost maddening
Sometimes, I just sit at my desk, thinking about you, thinking about us. You've stolen my heart and made a home in my mind. I love the idea of our future and I can't wait for it. I want to share everything with you; a last name; a home; a bed; a family; everything (except a toothbrush, that's a bit too close, sorry!)
Y/n L/n— Jan 15 (2008) 11:55
I can't wait to touch you, to hug you, kiss you, run my hands through your hair or wrap my arms around your hips and hold you close to me.
I can't wait to wake up next to you, to dance with you, to just be with you. I want to spend the rest of forever with you. I want to listen to your voice, to hear you talk about nothing in specific, just speaking so I hear your beautiful voice. Even if I’ve never heard it, I know it’s beautiful.
I can't wait to grow old with you. I hope the last thing I see before nothingness is you, your perfect face.
Y/n L/n— Jan 26 (2008) 22:22
This feels awkward to admit.
I usually consider myself smart, or at least good with words but with you in the picture, all English escapes me; with just a thought of you, I can barely manage a sentence, you get me so flustered I can't even think properly.
Though I'd be a damn liar if I said I didn't like the way you make me feel.
Y/n L/n— Feb 7, (2008) 04:10
Y/n L/n, I want you to be my forever, I love you more than anything (even reading and that says a lot).
I'm not feeling great right now which makes it hard to think of the words I'm trying to say but that won't really stop me.
You're the vowels to my consonants, you may not feel like a lot but you're so fucking important. I want to wake up next to you, your pretty face - have I mentioned I love your face? - holding each other, our bodies tangled together and someday having to break apart to check on our children.
I want to just exist with you, I don't care what happens as long as I'm with you. I want to dance around our kitchen at midnight, in only underwear just because, it won't matter, it's our lives and we're together. I want to just talk to you, maybe sitting on a roof at two in the morning, staring at the sky and not caring that it's out of reach because the only thing I want to touch is the person next to me.
Y/n, you are my tomorrow and I can't wait for you to be my today.
Y/n L/n— Feb 7, (2008) 11:20
I saw you smile today, like for real, in person. It was the most beautiful sight I've ever experienced. It made me feel like the most important thing in existence, it was perfect and for that moment, everything was okay, nothing mattered but you.
I didn't think I could love you more than I already did, I wasn't sure it was physically possible, and then I saw you, in person, in the town I've lived since I was 22, in the convention center I'd been so many times before.
With you sitting here the place feels important, this place is special. You're right here, right now and I've never been so happy.
I'm so nervous, but I'm happy, I mean you're here, this is all real, and god you so much more than perfect.
I can tell you really love DnD because the second I walked into the hall, I saw you were smiling.
This is honestly just a room full of nerds but that's cool, everyone's happy to be here, and I’d be the biggest liar if I said I wasn’t a nerd.
Y/n L/n— Feb 7, (2008) 19:50
I spoke to you, it took way too long, longer than I'd like to admit, but I did it.
I hugged you today, I made you smile. I wanted to kiss you, properly. I was too nervous though, I was scared. (Touches are scary enough as just a thought!) I also knew that if I kissed you it'd just make us both even more upset about being apart again. I'm so glad I got to spend almost half of the day with you, it was amazing.
We sang together and I've never felt so comfortable than in those moments, reciting poetry with you was probably the best part of my day aside from you kissing me . We also laughed together a lot and you let me lay on your shoulder, I almost fell asleep twice. It was really nice, just being with you, even though we weren't even close enough to touch each other most of the time.
I can't wait to see you again, I might count the days!
Y/n L/n— Feb 8, (2008) 01:33
I have to admit, when I first caught a glimpse of you, I only saw your hair.
The back of your head from maybe thirty feet away.
I saw your hair, and everything slowed down, I moved forward, I can't remember how fast- that part's a bit of a blur- I got closer and my whole body froze up, maybe I was still a little cold, but I couldn't bring myself to move, kind of glad my scarf covered half of my face. I watched, seeing more and more of you as time passed, just small glimpses of your adorable face, and it felt like every part of my body was on fire.
My heart was racing and I couldn't believe it, this was real, I was real, you were real and we were mere seconds away from each other, finally.
I turned around and walked out - I was overheating in my sweater – and I came back to keep watching you. This was around the time you, I think, actually noticed me, but you weren't the only one. They knew I was looking for you - well, looking at you, really. They asked questions and I gave half-witted, half-baked responses, still watching you then you looked at me, you smiled. My heart stopped and for a moment, I thought you'd killed me, with your stunning looks, obviously. I smiled back when I was finally self aware again, and the next thing I know, I'm sitting two feet away from you, and shaking.
Y/n L/n— Feb 8, (2008) 20:20
I'm starting to think I'm obsessed with you, that I'm addicted to you, anyway. That’s a bit of a problem, I’ve told you about Dilaudid so you understand why.
You asked me to sit with you and your party, I had already decided that I wanted to, and I was going to try to, I had just really wanted to be close to you, I wanted to touch you, you were so close but so fucking far.
I wanted nothing more than for you to steal my first kiss, though I knew I wouldn't mind if you didn't, I'm an impatient person, I'm perfectly okay going your speed, whatever that may be. I will say honestly, it wouldn’t be my first kiss. My true first kiss was in a pool, truly against my will. I’ve erased what I can from that and will regard the first time my lips are on yours as my first kiss.
I didn’t just end up with your party, I was a part of it. I played your character (bee-da), and I used the dice set you gave me. I was excited but I also felt the fatigue setting in. I started shifting closer to you, moving my body closer to yours. I fought to hold in a whine when you'd move in your seat, making it a bit harder for me to do what I was trying to do.
I offered you a hug, it was kind of selfish, I was truly asking more for myself than I'd like to admit. You said yes and I felt the weight on my heart disappear. I hugged you and I felt okay. It's a feeling I'd sacrifice my life to feel again. I laid my head on your shoulder and I felt you shift for me, you made sure I was comfortable, I'm not sure if you even realized you'd done it.
I was only growing more tired as the afternoon continued, I knew why (I hadn't been eating, at all, really) but I wasn't going to tell you. I began to doze off a few times, it was difficult trying to stay awake while feeling more comfortable and safe than ever before.
I just wanted you.
All I want is you
All I've wanted for a while now, is you
I want you so badly. In so many ways.
Y/n L/n— Feb 9, (2008) 08:08
I love you
The words I felt on the tip of my tongue for hours before I actually said them to you. I really wanted to, I wanted to sit next to you, mumble 'I love you' so quietly that it was just for your ears and kiss you, so that everyone saw. I didn't and I'm kind of upset with myself but I didn't want you to be uncomfortable, you'd just said you were so nervous.
I watched you eat, you didn't seem to eat much so I hoped you'd been eating before I got back. I wanted right then as we sat across from each other to announce it, so all of your friends could hear (or at least some), and say 'i love you'. I didn't, I was scared, I was nervous, of making you uncomfortable.
When I sat next to you, I still wanted to say it, I wanted to sing it, to shout it, anything and everything I could to show you just how much I love you. I tried to force the words out, they wouldn't come and for the first time in a while, I was upset with my anxiety. I kept looking at you and glancing at you, hoping it wasn't obvious that I was so upset. I want to smash my head into the table but I knew you'd notice that.
When I finally said 'I love you' the satisfaction was so great, it's indescribable. You said it back and I felt so good, I don't know why it felt so different feeling you say it, right next to me, but it was. I wanted to keep saying it, 'I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you' I didn't, I was scared to annoy you.
I wanted to kiss you, so many times that day, that still perfect day. When I first saw you, part of me wanted to run over and pull you into my arms and kiss you. I didn't, I didn't want to be the one to make a scene. I wanted to call out to you, I wanted to shout, "Y/n!" I wanted you to see me, to hear me, but I chose to wait.
When I was sitting near you, I wanted to turn around and press a kiss to the back of your head, I kept turning around, trying to force myself to do it. I never did. When we were centimeters away from each other, I wanted to press a kiss to your cheek, to your neck, your nose, your lips. I was scared of someone seeing at that point. I was kind of scared of your friends, that's why I didn't talk much.
I wanted to be closer to you, I was already so close, I was touching you for half of the day, but I wanted to be closer, I couldn't help it, I was seeing you in person for the first time, you're even prettier in person, and you smelled so nice and it felt so familiar already even though I had never experienced anything like it.
I wanted you. I still do, I always do, you're just so perfect, how could I not?
Y/n L/n— Feb 9, (2008) 09:47
You pulled my hair, I'd really wanted you to do it again. I– I had to bite my lip or I'd have definitely let out a sound, I honestly wasn't prepared for that and becoming- in front of your friends was not on my agenda, actually.
I can still feel it, the sensation of your hands reaching into my hair to run through it and tugging, I loved that feeling. And I would walk a hundred (and twenty) miles to feel it again, among everything else, I hope you know that.
Y/n L/n— Feb 9, (2008) 11:15
I love you so much it hurts.
I love you so much that it brings me physical pain to think about the fact that I can't touch you, the fact that I can't kiss you, the fact that I can't run my hands through your hair when I can't sleep at night.
It hurts a lot, but I know my patience and my pain will be worthwhile once I can do it. When I can once again see your eyes gleam with a perfect kind of joy, when I can hold you, my arms around you, and yours around me.
I swear to the gods, as soon as I'm able I'm going to see you again, nothing will stop me, I will fight anything standing in my way.
I love you so much it hurts. It's a pain that'll make me stronger. I'm okay with that.
Y/n L/n— Feb 9, (2008) 14:45
This one’s a little different. I’m sorry
When Morgan called me to say we had a case, I got upset, he knew how excited I had been to be able to see you. I wanted to yell at him and I almost did, then I remembered where I was, and who was around me. A bunch of people who didn’t deserve to watch/listen to me have a mental breakdown down on the phone, so instead of arguing, for your sake, I just agreed.
I wanted to run out there and scream at him, but I knew I wasn't thinking. i was letting my emotions take over, so i didn’t. I went back and hugged you, one last time. I wanted to cry because I knew it wouldn’t last long enough. I wanted so badly to stay there and tell my mentor to fuck off, I didn’t. Maybe I should’ve.
When I got back to my city, to my place of work, I just sat at my desk until we left for the airport. I didn’t even change. I’m surprised I didn't start crying. The relief I had felt from seeing you was gone and left behind was a frustration and want that had to have been tangible. I kept writing my next letter to you because it was my only comfort other than the lingering feeling of your presence and the memory of your scent. I ended up falling asleep on the jet, I can't remember when, I was too upset.
I woke up, some part of me expecting to be somewhere else, I just wanted to recover from the nightmare I’d had- I don’t know why it happened but it did and I wanted to cry, it felt disgustingly real. I just wanted someone to comfort me and tell me everything’s okay and that I’m safe. But I don’t have that. I’m sorry, the highlight of my day today has been writing to you and reading what you wrote.
Y/n L/n— Feb 9, (2008) 15:45
I’m so scattered right now, but I think about you and I feel okay. You’re not really just my tomorrow anymore. You are my today and my tomorrow, you have been the entire time, I’m just blind.. You’re my forever, and I love that. I keep getting lost in my thoughts thinking about you, damn, imagine if you were next to me, I couldn't possibly stay on track doing anything, you’re such a distraction. I love you.
Y/n L/n— Feb 10, (2008) 09:10
I have yet to actually tell you this and I feel kind of bad you're finding out this way but it's also the reason why I haven't told you about it.
A few weeks ago, my attacks had gotten worse and I've been fighting nightmares almost nightly.
Friday, I was really fucking nervous, I was partially convinced that you'd hate me when you saw me, you didn't though, that was relieving. I was literally shaking, I was terrified. When you said hi, as awkward as it felt and was, it made me feel less anxious. I felt bad when I left because I didn't want you to think I wasn't coming back.
I was trying really hard to seem like I wasn't about to cry but I was so anxious and I felt like it wasn't working. You didn't ask so I told myself it was fine, eventually, I was alright, it was really calming just being around you, and I liked that a lot.
I love you lots and I really hope I can come to see you on your birthday. If there is a case, I will see you as soon as I can.
Y/n L/n— Feb 10, (2008) 12:12
I had a dream
I'm glad I had it, it was nice.
I remember as I fell asleep I wished for the warmth and comfort of another human, specifically you, because I decided if I had to overheat I wanted it to be because I had my favorite person next to me. I was kinda disappointed in the gods when I woke up and you weren't there though.
I was dreaming that we were together, I've no clue where we were but we were in a bed, cuddling. I have no idea what led up to this moment, but I don't think I need to know. Your arms were around me, your hair was in my face and I could feel you breathing. It was amazing, you were talking to me, I can't remember everything you said, but there were a lot of 'I love you's and it was perfect. It was soft and warm and quiet and peaceful.
I can't wait for it to come true.
Y/n L/n— Feb 11, (2008) 19:22
When I was little, I wanted everything in my life to be big, beautiful and expensive. I wanted the perfect girlfriend (or boyfriend, I didn't care), a huge wedding, and a big family. So much has changed since then.
All I want now, is to be alive and happy with my better half, my soulmate, my perfect match. Whether that means listening to the stomping of small children early on a Saturday morning, being woken up by an impatient animal, or sleeping all day because it's just us, I want that happy, I want that calm, I want that perfect.
I want weird dates and long drives for no reason. I want stupid jokes and petty arguments. I want movie nights and warm cuddles. I want everything-
with you
All of these things are things I can't imagine experiencing with someone that isn't you. Whether it's waking up late and rushing to get ready (so cliche), arguing over what to make for dinner or saying our vows in front of everyone we love, I have to do it with you.
I don't want to imagine a world where we aren't us (regardless of who 'we' are), because that world isn't right, but this one is.
I like us. I like us a lot.
Y/n L/n— Feb 12, (2008) 09:04
My sweater still kinda smells like you. I'm wearing it today and I've just noticed. It's fading even as I type this and I don't think it'll last all day but it's comforting nonetheless. I hadn't touched it since Friday so it's lasted almost a week. I'm secretly so happy your scent has lingered, it's soft and warm and calming. (Like vanilla, you remind me of vanilla) I kinda hope I don't fall asleep at work.
Y/n L/n— Feb 12, (2008) 09:20
My mind is always buzzing– there's always so much happening, sometimes you can see it, in my eyes. There's one thing, only one, that's always on my mind.
You, Y/n L/n, you.
Even if I'm sitting doing work or if I'm reading, you're here and there and somewhere in my mind.
Sometimes you're the only thing I can think about, your soft hair, and eyes that shine so fucking bright; your warm smile and adorable laugh; your beautiful voice and perfect personality.
This is random but when you realized you were shorter than me you seemed so deflated and tried to stand on your tippy-toes and that was just precious. You had this look on your face and the way you laughed, the way your eyes lit up was just perfect.
Morgan says he’s going to New York in a few weeks. I've been asking if I could go with him because if I can't see you on your birthday, I want to at least see you again soon. And I don’t like driving. Or long train rides.
Tu fais battre mon coeur.
Y/n L/n— Feb 12 (2008) 15:30
It's only like two days away so I want to ask
Will you be my valentine?
Y/n L/n— Feb 12 (2008) 17:00
I've said some very bold things in just the past few months we've been together and I think I'm changing my mind about a few things.
I want to be a foster parent, just as much as I want my own children, because everyone deserves love.
I still don't want to try and adopt/foster babies, everyone does that, I want teens, kids who've spent years and the system because they need the most love.
I wanna know how you feel about that idea.
Y/n L/n— Feb 12 (2008) 17:12
I have a few things to say.
I was right, the smell definitely did not last all day, it was gone by lunch. The flannel still reminds me of that smell though, so it's okay.
I really hope you like long rants with no particular point because sometimes I start talking and forget how to stop, especially if I'm comfortable around someone.
I've had casual conversions with my mother about you on a few occasions. She loves you and says I should run up to you this minute and carry you to my apartment. I think I’m going to listen to her.
Y/n L/n— Feb 12, (2008) 18:18
This isn't directly about you but that doesn't really matter, right?
So Morgan.
He keeps calling me straight
And if he does it again.
I will kick him.
Just letting you know in case it happens and Hotch yells at me. I love you!
Y/n L/n— Feb 13 (2008) 02:40
I shouldn't be awake right now but I am. As I sit on my bed, I can't help but think about how, if we were together, in the same bed, you'd probably be awake too by now. You'd be asking me if I was okay, I think, and I tell you the truth because I'm so bad at lying, it isn't even worth the try. You probably comfort me, pulling me into your body, wrapping your arms around me and probably kissing me. Just the thought makes me feel a little better but it's not happening, you know? You're not sitting next to me, you aren't kissing me and whispering, "I'm right here, it's okay." because that isn't true.
I just woke up from a nightmare, I can confidently call this a nightmare for two reasons, so I will. I was kind of panicking when I woke up because I was so fucking scared, I couldn't breathe (in more ways than one) and I was crying. It's disgusting and I'm still upset.
Thinking about you being here vs. not, makes it clear that I need you, so fucking much, I need you, Y/n. I love you, and I need you and I want you. It's making me crazy that I can't even say this to you right now.
Tu es mon soleil.
Y/n L/n— Feb 14, (2008) 04:15
I know, I know, my sleep schedule is terrible, I'm sorry.
Happy Valentine's day, love, I'm so happy to be 'celebrating' with you, you're the best valentine and you're my valentine.
Thank you so much for (almost) five beautiful months, I love you so much and I am so excited for forever together.
Though, right now, more than anything, I want to kiss every single inch on your beautiful body, maybe even kiss them all two or three times.
I love your eyes. They shine as bright as stars.
I love your smile, the smile you had when you first noticed me is my favorite. Your lips, which I also love, part in a perfect kind of way and I love it.
I love your lips, the look of them, when you smile, when you're serious or when you frown; the feeling of them pressed to my skin, with the passion and feeling of your love for me. I love your lips, even if you don't.
I love your nose, it's adorable and I kind of want to kiss it; it's so adorable and I love that, you're so adorable.
I love your skin, the soft burning of it making contact with mine, the feeling when you touch me. I love everything about you, even the parts I don't know yet, I love even the idea of having the privilege of being able to love them.
So on this day of love, Y/n L/n, I love you so, so much, my heart is in your hands, do with it as you please.
Y/n L/n— Feb 14 (2008) 15:40
I like the name Y/n , I can't really explain why but I do. I really like the name Y/n.
I also like children more than I thought I would. I spent an hour at my JJ’s yesterday and my godson, Henry, he makes me think even more about having kids with you.
Y/n L/n— Feb 14 (2008) 15:55
You asked me what type of pretty you are.
You're the best kind of pretty, honestly.
You're the kind of pretty that makes my heart melt.
You're the kind of pretty that makes my chest feel tight (in a good way, of course).
You're the kind of pretty that makes a bad day amazing with just one look.
You're the kind of pretty that just makes the world seem less than terrible.
You're my favorite kind of pretty
Y/n L/n— Feb 14 (2008) 20:33
I should make this quick.
You are literally the most perfect part of my life, the only part of my life I hope never changes. You'd better be my forever because I can't ask for anyone better.
I'm stocking up on so many fucking hugs for you, I can not wait to hug you again, my body craves it.
I have to go now.
Y/n L/n— Feb 20 (2008) 11:25
I haven’t been writing much, but there’s so much I want to say, even though I can’t find the words. This is so difficult. I know so many languages and yet they’re all gone with one thought of you.
Y/n L/n, you have invaded every single part of my mind, I’m more than okay with that.
The problem arises with the fact that I can’t stand not having some type of contact with you. It just feels wrong and I’m overly anxious and paranoid.
Y/n L/n, having you in my life is a gift, and it’s the best gift I've ever gotten tbh.
My mind can’t fully recall the sound of your voice when you said ‘i love you’, or the sensation of your touch (your kisses and hugs, my head on your shoulder) but it’s there, and I hope it stays, long after this moment.
It’s kind of embarrassing to admit but sometimes the reason I keep going is the possibility of you, with me again, no matter how far away that event may be.
Y/n L/n— Feb 21 (2008) 22:25
I hope your polaroid camera starts to work soon because getting pictures from you is my favorite thing ever. Morgan said I should just give you my number, but I enjoy what we have. Our letters are more than enough.
Y/n L/n— Feb 21 (2008) 23:57
It's really late
I may or may not have had a little bit of alcohol.
You're really pretty!!!!!
I may or may not be about to drink more of the maybe alcohol...
Y/n L/n— Feb 22 (2008) 14:40
You sent me a CD. I put it in my player. I see you, you’re reading me The Little Prince because you said I need something to listen to to sleep. It's the best book I've ever heard and hearing you read it makes it so beautiful, every word, it's all perfect coming from your mouth, with your voice from your lips. I could listen for literally forever. Y/n L/n you are my today.
Y/n L/n— Mar 2 (2008) 22:55
I think about our future a lot. Usually it's good, sometimes it isn't. As with all things in life, there are details. Sometimes when I think about our future I'm only focusing on the things I know I want like, you next to me- with a ring on your finger and a smile on your face, or both of us, shopping and planning for a baby, obviously our first based off of how overly cautious we're being.
Anything like that, really.
Sometimes though, I think about what I don't know, like, where are we? what's our home look like? What are our future schedules and routines gonna look like? I know I'm overthinking (I always am) but I truly can't help it, it's something that just happens?
Y/n L/n— Mar 7 (2008) 13:11
I’m upset we haven’t been talking as much but that’s my fault, I knew what kind of commitment being an agent took, so I can’t really complain, I am sorry though. I think about you a lot though, sometimes it’s just ‘I hope Y/n’s okay’ ‘I hope Y/n’s smiling right now’ or something like that. Sometimes I just think about the sound of your voice, the feeling of your presence, or just you in general, you’re always there, always somewhere in my head, on my mind. If I’m not thinking about you, I’m probably not thinking at all.
Y/n L/n— Mar 7 (2008) 18:44
Before you, I had convinced myself that love didn't exist, it wasn't something I'd ever truly felt. I thought fate was bullshit and I hated the idea of soulmates because I believed I'd never find mine. That is, until I saw your face. At that point, you were nothing more than a polaroid photo, stimuli sent from my retinas to my optic nerve. But I felt something new. Something changed, I didn't feel as cold anymore.
Before I met you, I had convinced myself, naively, that I'd be alone forever, that I'd never meet anyone who would put up with me long enough to learn to love me. And then you waltzed into my life and changed everything. It was surreal, you were too-good-to-be-true and I was as ready as I could've been for heartbreak. What I did experience was nowhere near as horrible as the feeling I get at the thought of losing you now.
After I met you, I thought about it a lot, do soulmates exist? Until that point there'd only been one person I wished to be my soulmate (which was dumb, looking back now) but some part of me was drawn to you in a way I wasn't drawn to her. My feelings for you were different from my feelings for her.
When I'd convinced myself you'd never want me, I was hurt, I'd ever felt such pain, a deep physical pain, the kind you never forget. I guess it doesn't matter now, because that's in the past and I should move on.
I have you now, and god, I've never been so happy. You, Y/n L/n, are my soulmate and I'm so glad that we were made for each other. I couldn't ask for a better partner, future spouse, or soulmate. You are my everything and you give me purpose. You are my purpose.
Y/n L/n— Mar 9 (2008) 7:45
I couldn't sleep last night, I was thinking about you and it kept me awake, I think. I tried distracting myself but I kept finding you everywhere. At that point, I just let it happen and eventually fell asleep.
I'm angry, angry that I don't get to see you, because god I love seeing your face (you are literally so fucking pretty) and I love being near you in general.
I'm scared, scared that I won't be able to see you, even when I physically can. I don't know why I just, I hate the thought but it won't go away, I just want to hug you.
Y/n L/n— Mar 23 23:47 (2008)
It’s been a while since I did this- tomorrow’s your birthday and I’m pissed because I won’t get to see you, I can’t wish you happy birthday in person, shit I don’t know if I’ll be able to wish you happy birthday at all but that’s a whole other thing. Anyway, (here’s hoping you see this on your actual birthday-) HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Things might now be great right now but you’ve been alive for all this time and god I’m so proud of you for being so strong. You are amazing and I’m so happy I know you, I hope you’re birthday is fucking awesome, if not, I guess I’ll have no choice but to do everything I possibly can to make it better. I love you, Y/n L/n.
That’s it. The decision has been made for me. I just got a call, see you in New York.
(it just turned midnight, happy birthday)
Y/n L/n— Mar 24 (2008) 21:32
I only saw you for a few hours but again it was perfect. Before I left I made up my mind to do something. Turning around I ran back to your door. You opened it up and were so confused but I didn’t care. My hands cupped your cheeks and I kissed you. I kissed you 15 more times after, and then I left for my hotel room. I left something behind though - it was on purpose - slung on your couch is my cardigan. I want you to wear it and think of me.
Y/n L/n— Mar 29 (2008) 09:48
I'm not good with my words, shocking seeing as I'm a genius but it's true. I am terrible with my words, especially when it comes to you I just, my mind goes blank and I can't even form partially coherent sentences. That's probably why I suck at talking to you, I just can't think around you, I think it's because you're so perfect, I mean, it's true and it makes sense.
I got your letter today. You’re moving to DC. I don’t think I’ve ever been more crazed or excited. Everyone’s noticed it. I love you.
Y/n L/n— February 7th, (2020) 20:28
I stopped doing this when you moved to me. Everything that could have been written was said to you.
You're different. You're changing.
It's not a bad thing, it was inevitable; I'm far from the person I was three years ago. I'm just awful about adjusting to changes.
I like that you're different, it shows you're discovering yourself, you're turning out. Your changing as a person won't change how I feel about you because no matter what, you are so much greater than the sum of your parts and I think that's beautiful. I think you're beautiful.
I could never tire of you, as cliché as it is, I fall in love with you over and over everyday. I fall in love with every new and old part of you, because they're all so perfect.
I'd be lying (a terrible lie, might I add) if I said I wasn't thinking about you every moment of every day. I'm constantly thinking of you; Maybe wishing we were together, maybe wondering if you're thinking about me too, maybe hoping you're doing okay, maybe imagining our tomorrows, maybe thinking about your smile and how it shines brighter than any and every existing light source.
I rambled, yikes.
There’s something I want to ask and it’s years overdue (sorry.) After prison I found this and two years later I know what I want to do with it. I’m giving it to you, I’m fully giving my heart to you.
Look up, bumblebee. I’m waiting.
part two
#spencer reid x reader#love letters#fanfic#writing#reader insert#rewrite#true love#kissing#first kiss#omg these two#adorable dorks#snapshot#spencer x you#spencer reid
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How I Go About Writing A Fic
Step 1: Read the book/Watch the movie/Play the game
This is an obvious one, but I need to be aware and familiar with the piece of media.
Step 2: Have it become a hyperfixation
Quite possibly the most important step, and yet one I have no control over. I need to have this thing stuck in my head for the time being, without much else to distract from it.
Step 3: Get the idea
Another obvious one, I need a plan before I start writing. For the sake of an example, let’s say “hypothetically”, that I currently have 2 hyperfixation: Maze Runner and Newsies. Now, let’s say I get the idea to combine them because Newt and Crutchie give off a similar vibe. Now I have my idea; A TMR Newsies AU.
Step 4: Flesh it out
This is where I get to figure out how the other parts of the world fit together; in our example, I’d figure out which characters would be which. Thomas is Davey, Chuck is Les, Teresa’s Katherine, maybe Minho can be Jack, and obviously the inspiration for this was Newt as Crutchie. Janson can be Snyder, Ava Paige can be Pulitzer. Just little things like that, maybe Vince can be the bar guy and Mary can be Miss Medda.
Step 5: Gen or Ship?
This is also a very important decision, and it sometimes comes before the last step (4 and 5 switch around a lot). Do I want this to be a ship fic, or a Gen fic? I think personally I’d make it Gen or Newtmas, but maybe it could be Minewt or something, it all depends on who’s writing it (or I’ve seen that some people ship Minho and Teresa, so maybe it can stick closer to the plot of the musical).
Step 6: Start writing
Pretty self explanatory, I start writing the fic to see if it clicks, see if I have anything better than just a basic idea. If I do, great! If not, well what’s another abandoned doc when I already have so many?
Step 7: Rewriting
If I make it past step 6, I’ll repeat this one anywhere from 1-3 times, possibly even more. I want what I put out to be good, y’know? The best I can make it. I know someone else could do it better faster, but I want it to be my version of my idea, so I keep going through until it’s as good as I can make it.
Step 8: Posting
The fic is done, along with the rewrites, now it’s the world’s problem. If others like it, great. If not, maybe they’ll like the next thing I post.
I dunno what my point with this post is, maybe I’ll just make some people laugh or see similarities, maybe I just wanted to share my AU idea in a way that had a point (feel free to build off it, just tag me if you do, I wanna see!). Regardless, Props if you made it this far.
May your ventures into writing be successful, and your hyperfixation last for months but give you enough breaks to do your homework and eat!
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Lasersheith’s Fic Masterlist
Thanks so much to everyone who reads/likes/comments on/shares my stuff, it means the world to me!
Finished works
AU:
Take It If You Want It | Complete | Ch.13/13 | 57k | M
Tags: Modern AU, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, fluff, light angst with a happy ending, pining, irresponsible use of alcohol, side pairing: Mattor, side pairing: Allurance, side pairing: Hidge
Written for Sheith Big Bang 2018!
Keith and Hunk make New Year’s Resolutions to finally tell their respective crushes how they’ve felt for years. Hunk takes all of 3 minutes, but Keith needs… a little longer.
Birthday mishaps, misunderstandings, self discovery, exciting new job opportunities, minor blackmail… a lot can happen in a year. Surely the perfect moment for a years-overdue love confession fits in there somewhere?
Serendipity’s Wings | Complete | Ch.7/7 | 24k | E
Tags: Modern AU, Childhood Friends to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, bedsharing, fluff, hurt/comfort, pining Shiro, sidepairing: Allura/Kuro, Shirogane twins
When Shiro receives bad news about his grandfather, he immediately books a flight for Japan. Luckily for him, he finds a familiar face in the pilot. It's been a long time since he saw his childhood friend Keith, but they pick up where they left off almost immediately.
Unluckily, his twin brother has decided to jump to conclusions, and now his family thinks he and Keith have rekindled a flame that was never there. Rather than disappoint them in a tense moment, Keith gamely agrees to play along. What are friends for, after all?
Oh Brother | Complete | Ch. 6/6 | 17k | T
Tags: Modern AU, fluff, humor, salt, sidepairing Matt/Allura, one-sided kl
What do you do when your boyfriend is in the hospital and they only let in immediate family? Lie and say you’re married? Not if you’re Keith, you don’t. Thanks to Keith’s inner turmoil, he and Shiro are stuck pretending to be brothers while he recovers. But Keith has to admit, “Mr. Shirogane” has a nice ring to it.
The Gravitas of a Mattress | Complete | Ch. 7/7 | 16k | M
Tags: College AU, fluff, humor, oh my god they’re banging each other’s roommates, sidepairing Latte
From the prompt: My roommate got it on with yours yesterday and I don’t think I can face them for a while after hearing the sounds they made last night. Mind if I stayed with you for a while?
Keith gets sexiled from his dorm room because Matt and Lance won't stop hate-fucking. He decides that it's only fair that he gets to crash in Matt's room if Matt gets to keep him out of his own. Shiro is confused but accommodating. Very accommodating.
Matt and Lance have their own fun side adventure in learning to like each other and play nice. Pidge doesn't like it. Allura might.
Flowers don’t always mean “I love you” | Complete | Ch. 8/8 | 14k | T
Tags: Flowershop AU, Slow Burn, pining Shiro, PTSD, fluff, humor
Takashi Shirogane had fulfilled his dream of becoming a test pilot, but after a terrible accident that left him without an arm and in sudden need of a new career, he moves back home and starts working at a family friend’s flower shop while he focuses on recovering and finding a new direction for his life.
Things are going as well as can be expected until an attractive stranger shows up out of the blue, and keeps coming back. Who's this guy buying all these flowers for?
DDY 1138 | Complete | Ch. 3/3 | 7.2k | T | My favorite thing I’ve ever written
Tags: Modern AU, fluff, humor, meet ugly, disaster gay Shiro, smooth Keith
alternate title: Have you ever seen a man so beautiful you crashed your car?
Shiro learns that it's possible for the best day of your life to coincide with the worst day of your life in the dumbest way possible. He gets into a fender bender due to some distracted driving, and his cute mechanic doesn't make things any easier... until he does.
Hat Trick | Complete | Ch. 2/2 | 6.5k | E
Tags: Modern AU, Frat AU, Frat boy Shiro, Frat boy Keith, light angst with a happy ending, humor, crack played straight
No one has ever seen Takashi Shirogane without a hat on his head, or so the legends say.
...
“I tell you what,” Matt said after Keith told him he'd figure out Shiro's secret, the real secret. “If you find out the true story behind Shiro's hat before your initiation ceremony, I will personally pay your dues until you graduate.”
Keith's eyes glinted as he took another long swing from his beer. The steep price of brotherhood had been one of the few reasons he'd been wary about pledging. “What if I don't?” He asked suspiciously. It hadn't taken long to work out that Matt was an agent of chaos. No matter how confident he was in himself, he had to make sure it was worth the risk.
Matt smirked. “You have to wear a Santa hat to the Christmas party.”
Keith furrowed his brows. The punishment didn't add up with Matt’s smug look. His face paled as the realization dawned on him. “Just the hat?”
Matt's smirk shifted into an impish grin. “I knew you were a smart one.” He said with a wink, sticking out his hand. “Do we have a bet, then?”
Never one to back down from a challenge, Keith took Matt's hand and pumped it twice with determination. “You're on.”
Hey Sugar | Complete | Ch. 4/4 | 5k | G | I’m gonna rewrite this one soon rip
Tags: College AU, fluff, humor, pining Shiro, disaster gay Shiro
Autocorrect can be a beautiful thing. It can also be a Very Bad Thing. Keith accidentally sends a text with an embarrassing autocorrect to the hot guy he's been crushing on all semester.
Check Yes Juliet | Complete | Ch. 2/2 | 2.8k | T
Tags: College AU, fluff, humor, mistaken identity, Shirogane twins
Who knew a little Shakespeare knowledge could get you a midnight kiss from the hottest guy at the New Years party? However, young men’s love then lies not truly in their hearts, but in their eyes... Just ask Keith.
Melt | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1.4k | G
Tags: AU modern setting or Post-canon, domestic fluff, established relationship
It's way too hot outside, and the AC is busted. Short and sweet domestic fluff featuring Spot the fluffy wonder and a trip to the store for some much needed ice cream.
Canon-Verse:
The way you looked at me | Complete | 17k | M
Tags: Amnesia, crack played straight, one sided fake dating, shiro is a mess, humor, fluff
Keith wakes up in the hospital and he's not sure of much, except that he and Shiro are definitely together. Shiro doesn't have the heart to correct him- much to their friends' amusement.
It’s not you, it’s me (also it’s you) | Complete | Ch. 3/3 | 7.5k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, pre-kerberos mission, humor, miscommunication, disaster gay Shiro, Matt is a Bad Friend
Keith catches Shiro doodling hearts in his notebook. When asked who the hearts are for, he blurts out Matt's name so he won't have to confess his feelings for Keith. Now Keith has made it his mission to help Shiro woo Matt at all costs. Matt is very unhelpful.
The Sweetest Apology | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 2.3k | Gen
Tags: College AU, fluff, humor
Everyone hates those tiny little desks every college feels the need to cram into huge lecture halls- they're way too small and there's never enough of the left handed ones. Keith thinks he scored big time getting the only left handed desk in his new class, but didn't realize he'd be stealing it from a classmate who's missing his right arm... How do you even apologize for that?
Not the right time | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 2.3k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, angst
fic request: Sheith and "It is always not the right time for us, isn't it?"
They've had so many chances to tell each other how they feel, but for Shiro and Keith it just never seems to be the right time.
Ringing in my ears and one on my finger | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1.5k | T
Tags: soulmates, shiro is trying, fluff, humor
Canonverse soulmate AU: Colleen notices a soulmark on Shiro's finger...
Head over heels | Complete | Ch. 1/1| 1.5k | G
Tags: Canon-verse, established relationship, fluff, humor
Keith's lost an entire Saturday to detention because Iverson is jerk. What better way to get revenge than a practical joke?
from the prompt "Shiro getting caught up in Keith pranking Iverson"
With a little help from my friends | Complete | Ch.1/1 | 1.4k | G
Tags: Canon-verse, pre-relationship, everyone loves Shiro, thirsty Keith
A malfunction in the engine room has left the castle a sweltering nightmare. Hunk has deemed it time for a team underwear party, but Shiro's nervous about his scars. His friends help him feel a little better.
p=mv | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1.4k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, humor, meet ugly
The story of how Keith and Shiro met at the Garrison.
Or, the first time Keith saved Shiro.
Or, how a concussion led Shiro to the love of his life.
Or maybe it was all 3.
Love, Shiro | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1.3k | G
Tags: Canon-verse, fluff, established relationship, humor, kerberos mission
Shiro and Keith decide to write each other letters while Shiro is away on his mission. This is a collection of some of Shiro's.
Getting there | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1.3k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, hurt/comfort, Shiro whump, fluff
A lot of things changed in the year they were separated, but Keith's feelings aren't one of them. Shiro needs a little convincing after everything that's happened, especially with how much of an obvious physical toll it's taken. Keith is happy to oblige.
Just In Case | Complete | Ch. 1/1 | 1k | G
Tags: Canon-verse, humor, fluff, established relationship, pre-kerberos mission
Shiro is accidentally late for a morning inspection because he spent too long snuggled up with Keith. His commander isn't super thrilled about it.
Series: It’s killing me when you’re away | Complete | Works 4/4 | 4.8k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, Keith’s time in the desert, angst, pre-kerberos mission
Keith’s devastated over losing Shiro
Tumblr Drabbles
Sheith Month 2018 | Canonverse Pre-Kerberos | 20k | G-T
My collection of prompt fills for Sheith Month 2018. All of them are pre-kerb fluff and/or humor!
As Many Drabbles As It Takes | Mix of settings | 10k | Ch. 14/? | M
Collection of sheith drabbles and prompt fills originally posted on Tumblr!
Posted WIPS:
Series: Easier with you | Ongoing | Works 6/? | 15k | M
Tags: Modern AU, Veteran Shiro, Veteran Keith, hurt/comfort, PTSD, Mutual Pining, Shiro Whump, Shiro & Matt, Allura/Matt,
Shiro's just returned back from the military, having been medically discharged from service after losing his arm. Matt is his best friend and is trying his best to help him deal with the loss. He convinces Shiro to go to a VA support group that will end up changing his life.
Best laid plans | Ongoing | Ch. 1/? | 2.3k | T
Tags: Canon-verse, crack, humor, fluff
Was Keith proud of the fact that petty revenge was his first thought upon being given an amazing stealth suit? Not particularly. But was he going to let that stop him from enacting said petty revenge? Absolutely not. Turns out, Karma isn't so much a bitch as a… well, you'll see.
Or, how to attempt to counter-prank your buddy and end up stuck as a cat, a memoir by Keith Kogane.
We’ll fix it in post | Ongoing | Ch.1/? | 2k | T
Tags: Modern AU, Barista Keith, humor, mistaken identity, Shirogane Twins
Shiro is a producer on the hit animated show "Voltron: Warden of the Cosmos" and a huge fan of it himself. Keith is a new barista at the coffee shop across from his studio and a lover of his show. A fortuitous meeting leads them on the path to romance, but there's just one problem: Keith thinks Shiro is his brother, Ryou, voice actor for Keith's favorite character on the show.
#samwrites#long post#way too long#why am i like this#fic masterlist#if anyone has organizational ideas for this beast please please dm me i'm drowning#updated september 2nd#sheith
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a post no one asked for!
hello so i reblogged a questionnaire a lil bit ago and i’m going to answer them now because...why not
1. how old are you?
im 18!
2. are you in high school or college(university)?
college
3. what year or grade are you in high school or (university)?
im a freshman in college
4. what is your school’s grading system look like? do you like it? what problems do you have with it, if any?
so my university has a standard letter grade system for most classes and pass/fail for some courses that don’t really need a grade. i do like it because it’s what i’m used to, however, a lot of times having a letter grade system can be more stressful because it makes you feel like anything but some kind of A is mediocre and not good enough, when in reality, a 75% or above is better than average.
5. if you are in high school do you plan on going to university or college? if you are in college do you plan on finishing and if you do, do you plan on continuing on to other graduate or professional schools?
i plan on going to veterinary school after i finish my undergraduate degree! if i end up changing my major to my second choice(music education is my second choice), then of course I won’t be going to vet school.
6. if you are high school what do you plan to study in college, if you plan to go. if not, what do you plan on doing after high school? if you are in college what is your major? do you plan on changing it?
i am currently studying biochemistry and molecular biology and i have a minor in music! i dont plan on changing it at this point, but if i do, i’d change it to music education.
7. why are you picking or why did you pick what you are currently studying?
i want to go to vet school, and biochemistry has almost all the requirements for vet school admissions. also, i find it interesting
8. do you go/plan to go to community college, technical college, or a four-year institution? how did you make your decision, or how do you plan to?
i am at a 4 year university, and i went here because it fits what i want to do
9. what factors did you consider when picking a college, or what factors do you plan on considering?
the college I chose is in my hometown, which is probably one of the deciding factors(i really wanted to be close to home). the campus is very pretty and small as well, and i really wanted to go to a small college. i could have potentially gone to The Ohio State University because i’m about 20 minutes away, but the camous is so big and i know i would have hated it. the school also has a good music program, soi can continue playing even though it isn’t my major
10. what is your favorite pencil?
i love my muji mechanical pencil and also the papermate clearpoint!
11. what are your top three favorite pens?
pilot juice, muji gel pens, and sharpie pens
12. do you prefer wide-ruled paper, college-ruled, dot-grid, or graph paper?
college ruled is my favorite for class notes, graph paper for revised/nice notes/math work, and blank for planning generally
13. do you use different types of paper for different courses or classes?
i use college ruled for almost everything except math homework(i use graph)
14. do you use a backpack/bag for school or college and what kind is it? why did you choose it? price, quality, function, design?
i use a backpack, i have no idea what brand it is, but its the perfect size for everything i need to take to classes and its also really pretty(it has a black background with flowers on it)
15. what is your favorite outfit to go to class in and why?
i generally wear leggings and a sweatshirt/sweater just because they’re comfy and also look cute! if its warm enough, i wear flip flops but if not, i wear my vans or converse.
16. what is something you always have to have in your backpack or bag?
usually my laptop and pencil case
17. what is your least favorite subject and why?
math!!!!!!! will always hate. guarunteed.
18. have you ever gone to tutoring, if so, how has it helped your academic endeavors?
i have not
19. have you ever seeked academic counseling, if so has it helped you?
i haven’t
20. has your mental health ever suffered during high school or college, and what did you do to cope?
holy shit yes. i suffer from depression and anxiety(depression for almost a year and anxiety for 4 years). i could make a whole post about this but in general, i make sure i give myself time to relax. it can be so so hard to take care of yourself when you suffer with things like this, so even if you can barely get out of bed, try to make time to do things that make you happy. for me, it’s drawing, netflix, and video games.
21. do you like to listen to music when studying? if so, what genre, if you have a playlist share it!
i do listen to music! i just listen to music i like, which is rock/pop punk/alt rock/etc. (here’s one of my playlists!: https://open.spotify.com/user/helenakitten14/playlist/4R6ZGIlz8K5UDEk80cVfV5?si=cXK0z3HTRUKCQSKx9F8tNA )
22. do you prefer to study at a library or at home at your desk?
depends what i’m working on and how much i have to do. if i feel like i have to be totally focused, i go to the library, but if i have some time to take breaks and get distracted, i just stay in my room. I also hate going to the library on my own, so sometimes i stay in my room anyway if no one can come with.
23. what are your top three items you keep on your desk?
my lamp, my laptop, and whatever drink i’m drinking while working( i always have a drink so i avoid snacking lol)
24. do you feel as if you are more productive during the day or in the evenings?
evenings for sure
25. if you exercise, do you feel as if it affects your productivity and if so how?
i do marching band which is usually my exercise, but i don’t work out. working out just exhausts me and i don’t have energy to begin with(ye ye depression)
26. do you participate in any extracurriculars and if so how do you manage your time?
marching band and wind ensemble! i’m also joing KKPsi, which is an honorary fraternity for music service! i am not great at time management, however, i plan out everything to hold myself accountable
27. do you use a bullet journal, a planner, or to-do lists? do you use a combination of all three?
i use a combo of all three! i’ve been bullet journalling a lot recently, but i also use a planner during busy weeks when i dont have time to make a spread and i make to do lists for weekends
28. do you have a note-taking style?
nothing specific
29. do you have a color-coding system?
i like to make every different topic/spread a different color. also, when i make notes, i like to highlight vocab words.
30. what do you believe is one of the most overrated studyblr trends?
100 days of productivity. its impossible to be completely productive for 100 days straight. shit happens, and i understand the purpose of the 100 days challenge, but i think it also takes a toll on you mentally.
31. what are your career goals, how do you plan to reach them?
i want to be a veterinarian or someone that works with animals somehow. i hope to go to vet school and then have my own practice or join another practice.
32. do you use a laptop? if so which model? how does it perform, would you reccomend it? if not, what model would you like?
i use a macbook air! it is nice because it is easy to transport, but occasionally the functionality can be questionable(storage space is always my issue). i do reccommend it, though. if i could get a new laptop, i’d probably get a macbook pro.
33. do you use a tablet? if so which model? how does it perform, would you reccomend it? if not, what model are you interested in?
i don’t, but i think having an iPad would be nice!
34. if you post pictures to tumblr, do you use a camera or your phone, if so, what is the model?
i use my iPhone 6s
35. 0.5, 0.7, or 0.9 pencil lead?
usually .5 or .7
36. 0.5, 0.7, 0.9, or 1.0 pens?
.5
37. how many hours a day do you spend studying? are your hours consistent daily or do they differ depending on assignments and exams?
i tend to study for a majority of the day most days, but it always differs. i have no set timetable
38. how many courses do you take? what are they?
so i am in 8 courses right now. Biology, Gen Chem, Bio Lab, Gen Chem Lab, Calculus I, The History of rock n roll, Wind Ensemble, and Marching band.
39. how long until you graduate? in credit hours, semesters, or years?
i still have 3.5 years left of college, which is 7 semesters
40. how did you find the studyblr community?
honestly i dont remember, it was so long ago
41. how did the studyblr community impact you?
i was in a big funk my sophomore year of high school. i had no motivation, i hated learning, i hated everything tbh. but them i found this community and it inspired me and showed me that studying can be fun and pretty while also being a learning experience!
42. do you go to school in the day or night?
day!
43. what is something you are too afraid to be involved in at school or college and why?
in high school, i was very afraid to get involved with a lot of things, such as theatre and some other clubs just because of anxiety.
44. do you type or write your notes?
i write them mostly, but my biology professor talks really fast so i usually type notes for his class
45. what do you do on your breaks from studying?
netflix, eat, play video games, probably other stuff i’m forgetting
46. how do you study for math exams?
honestly i just look through lecture notes and hope for the best. occasionally i do practice problems but not often
47. do you rewrite your notes at home after class, or do you just use the ones you have already? why?
i rewrite them because it helps me memorize things
48. what are your least favorite courses and why?
math of any kind! i also hate biology right now just because my professor sucks
49. are you in a relationship while in school? if so, why? if not, why?
i recently got out of a relationship, but im open to being in a relationship with someone
50. if you are in a relationship, how do you manage that along with your studies?
it was very hard to manage it honestly, but i did what i could to make time, even if it was only just having a meal together.
51. if you aren’t in a relationship, do you plan on entering one while still in school? explain.
if i find the right person, yea! being in relationsips is great, especially because you have a companion to help you when you’re struggling
52. do you worry about GPA, if so why, if not why?
oh my god yes i do. i have to have a certain GPA to keep my scholarship money and to stay in the honors program, plus i just want to do well.
53. did you or do you plan to take the SAT or ACT, how did you feel about the exams? did you study for them? have you taken it more than once?
i did take both the SAT and ACT. i did well on each, but the SAT was a lot harder for me. I got a 1220(i think) on the SAT and a 31 on the ACT. i took the ACT twice
54. did you or do you plan to take the GRE, LSAT, PCAT, MCAT, DAT (or any other grad exam)? how did it go? how are you or how did you study for it? have you taken it more than once?
i’m going to take the MCAT
55. do you or did you take AP classes is high school? how do you feel about how they prepared you for college? did your school require you to take the exam?
yes i did take AP classes! i took 9 total, and they overall did help me learn how to manage time better as well as how to study. we weren’t required to take the exams, but i always did
56. do you or did you do the IB program in high school? can you explain it more for those who are unfamiliar with it?
i did not, however the IB program is basically an intensive high school honors program that is very writing intensive. its like AP on steroids
57. do your or did you take dual-enrollment classes? how did you feel about how they prepared you for college?
i didnt but i wish i did!
58. how many colleges or universities did you apply to or not? and why?
i applied to 5 colleges. i already knew where i wanted to go, but i wanted to be safe just in case i didnt get in, so i applied to the 5 i was most interested in. I also wanted to see if any other schools would give me a lot more financial aid.
59. how did you make friends in college or high school?
through band! in both situations
60. has your friend group stayed the same throughout your time in school?
yes actually! i’m still very close to all my high school friends and a few of them go to my college as well. of course i’ve met new people but i. also still have the same friends
61. how does your friend group influence your goals?
we all have our own goals, we just encourage each other and act as an outlet for stress
62. what is your favorite thing to learn about in your free time?
music and current events
63. what is your favorite study snack?
i like to eat carrots/pretzels with hummus or oreos
64. what is one thing that can completely make you stop studying?
being depressed or tired
65. are there days during the week that you keep completely free from studying?
yes. wednesdays are my hell days class-wise, so i refrain from doing work on those days after my classes are over
66. what do you do when you have to hustle? where do you go?
i dont know what this means
67. are your parents or family supportive of your goals? if so how does this affect you?
they’re very supportive!
68. do you like to read? and do you ever have any free time to do so?
i really love reading but i never have time
69. do you wear a watch? why or why not? what kind?
nope, they annoy me
70. do you like to drink coffee or tea when working? decaf? what do you add to it? why do you like to drink coffee or tea?
coffee with full caffeine! i always add creamer, and i drink it because it wakes me up
71. how do you organize your notes after your finish writing them?
i have notebooks for every class and binders as well
72. what do you do with your notes after the year or semester is over?
i either recycle them if they won’t be necessary anymore or i keep them in my closet
73. what are your favorite studyblrs?
studyign, emmestudies, and a lot more that i can’t think of
74. what are your favorite studygrams?
same as above except add on focusign and revisign!
75. what is the biggest impact a teacher or a professor has had on you?
my band director was very impactful on my life just because he was my teacher for 5 years, so we had a good relationship
76. what is the biggest impact that a class has had on you?
my film and lit class had a massive impact on me. it made me think in very different ways
77. who is your inspiration and who do you look up to academic wise and career wise?
my dad inspires me a lot because he worked so hard to find a career he loved and kept going until he got there. he’s also endlessly supportive of me
thats it! this took me so long hahaha anyway. thanks for reading!
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Castiel’s POV fics: Canon verse
Castiel is a complex character that has had an incredible journey that began even before he pulled a certain hunter out of the depths of hell more than eight years ago. Here are a few of our favorite destiel stories told from Cas’ point of view (POV). This list is not meant to be exhaustive. Instead we are highlighting fics that we personally enjoyed and we hope you enjoy them, too! Be sure to check out our Castiel’s POV Fics: Alternate Universe as well!
Thanks to euclase/ @eliciadonze/ @eliciaforever, who provided us with permission to use her beautiful art! (link to #euclase fanart tag at destielfanworks) All fic links got to our reviews.
I. Some of our favorite, in character Cas’ POV fics. We've added asterisk [*] to fics with little bits of Dean’s POV.
525,600 Minutes by oatmeal_queen [M, 45,000, angst, fallen Cas]
A Crash Course in Someone Else’s History by scaramouche [T, 11,500, season 6, angst]
Après by imogenbynight [NC-17, 24,000, post season 8, fallen Cas, fluff]
Broadway Musical by griftings [M, 12,400, pre s4, crack]
Castiel Rising by phate-phoenix [NC-17, 70,000, pre season 4, season 5, angst]
Cuckoo and Nest by komodobits [NC-17, 10,200, angst, bunker, established relationship]
Domesticated by kototyph [M, 15,200, animal transformation, fluff]
Do What Feels Good by catchclaw & cymbalism [NC-17, 12,500, season 9, fallen Cas, porn] *
In the Shuffling Madness by araftatsea [T, 45,500, season 7, angst, mental hospital!cas]
In the Spine by castiel_left_his_mark_on_me [T, 5,500, fallen Cas, bunker, tragedy]
The Inexhaustible Silence of Houses by askance [M, 31,900, mute, fallen Cas, horror, tragedy]
Jubilees by ghostyouknow [M, 17,400, seasons 4-6, angst, mpreg, unrequited]
Nestfallen Verse by glassyskies [T, 17,000, season 4, unrequited]
Pieces by castiel_for_king [T, 23,300, season 11, angst, post Casifer, bunker] *
Reaching As I Fall by apokteino [NC-17, 75,000, pre season 4, michael!dean]
Return to Sender Address Unknown by gedry, [T, 9,400, season 5, angst, fallen Cas, hunter Cas] *
Something Stupid by zatnikatel [NC-17, 20,400, season 5, fluff]
There Are Many Things by imogenbynight [NC-17, 28,800, season 9, angst, fallen Cas]
These Are Not Real Problems by scaramouche [NC-17, 30,500, angst, post Godstiel, afterlife]
These Forsaken Lands by destielpasta [M, 53,700, season 9, angst]
This Isn’t Where We Intended To Be by porcupinegirl [NC-17, 14,000, bunker, fallen!Cas, fluff]
This Thing Called Free Will by tracy_loo_who [T, 2,500, angst, tragedy]
Waiting For More by peridium [NC-17, 15,100, season 11, body swap, fluff, porn]
The Way Back by rainylemons [Gen, 36,000, post season 5, angst, fallen Cas]
When Worlds Collide by jhoom [NC-17, 58,000, fluff, endverse!cas, it’s a terrible life!au]
II. These canon fics may have alternating POV, but we enjoyed the characterization and in depth look at Dean and Castiel’s relationship.
any port in a storm by mishcollin [M, 52,700, post season 8, angst, fallen!cas]
The Cabin by bookkbaby [NC-17, 16,300, angst, wing!fic]
Hands, From Which All Things Are Built by majorenglishesquire [T, 14,600, season 8, angst]
My Heart Is Beating From Me by Enochian Things [M, 55,100, season 9, angst, fallen!cas]
So Says The Sword by komodobits [NC-17, 85,200, su, angst, pre season 4]
Someone Who’s Feeling For Me by ellispark [M, 45,800, season 12, angst]
The Way Out by awed_frog [T, 67,500, post season 11, angst]
We Are Such Stuff by inevitabletheif [NC-17, 62,000, season 10/11, angst]
III. And a special mention to special fics!
A Light For My Path by domesticadventures [M, 25,500, fluff]
Dean and Cas’ story told from the point of view of Cas’ car, Lincoln Continental.
Redemption Road [NC-17, 650,000, community project, season 7 rewrite]
Dean goes to amazing lengths for Cas and some chapters feature Cas POV.
Check out our Tags Page for more Cas related tags; link to other rec lists.
If you enjoyed the fic, please drop by the archive (AO3) and let the author know with your comments and/or kudos! And if you found our recs useful, let us know by Liking and/or Reblogging our posts.
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The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did���it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong published first on https://nickpontemrktg.wordpress.com/
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The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
from Marketing https://unbounce.com/lead-generation/conversion-rate-b2b/ via http://www.rssmix.com/
0 notes
Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
from Marketing https://unbounce.com/lead-generation/conversion-rate-b2b/ via http://www.rssmix.com/
0 notes
Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
from Digital https://unbounce.com/lead-generation/conversion-rate-b2b/ via http://www.rssmix.com/
0 notes
Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong published first on http://nickpontemktg.blogspot.com/
0 notes
Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
from Marketing https://unbounce.com/lead-generation/conversion-rate-b2b/ via http://www.rssmix.com/
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Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
0 notes
Text
The Simple Reason Why Your B2B Lead Gen Conversion Rates Are Completely Wrong
If you spend $1,000 on a lead gen campaign and get 250 leads, that’s a cost per lead of $4, right?
So wrong.
And, yeah, I know what you’re thinking: “That’s a bullshit clickbait title, Oli.” Thing is, not only is it completely true, but the impact of this mistake is countless ROI calculations that are totally incorrect. A quick LinkedIn search for roles in marketing and advertising produced 2,282,979 results in the US and Canada alone. How many of those people are presenting the wrong numbers to their bosses and clients?
To understand what’s happening, we first need to consider how it’s happening—and why.
The Three Levels of Marketing IQ
The theme of this year’s CTAConf in September is Marketing IQ, and one of the concepts I’ll be talking about in my keynote is the three levels of marketing intelligence—each of which manifests its own version of how lead generation is done and measured.
Low IQ Marketing
This is spammy marketing that chases leads at all cost—”hacks” and “tricks” that deliver a really poor experience and produce results that aren’t useful. These are techniques that have no business in the operations of a respectable marketing team or an organization with strong core values.
Fixed IQ Marketing
This is marketing that’s good, but doesn’t go deep enough. You might have a great landing page, but you’re only measuring success by the conversion rate or the number of conversions—both of which are great metrics that are unfortunately incorrect. This leads to the inaccurate ROI calculations I mentioned earlier.
High IQ Marketing
This is marketing that takes things to a new level, going past surface-level findings to understand the true value of your generated leads. High IQ marketers apply a more intelligent method to calculating their ROI, which I’ll get to in a moment.
Get 15% off your tickets to CTAConf 2019. Want to raise your marketing IQ with insights from some of the top minds in the industry? Use the code MarketingIQ during checkout and save a bundle.
What Does Marketing IQ Look Like?
Here’s what I mean. All B2B lead gen campaigns will produce two types of leads that aren’t actually leads.
Spam email addresses from form-filling bots.
Fake email addresses from people who don’t want to be put on a list.
With this in mind, if you don’t go through your leads list and clean out the bad data, your conversion rate calculations (and hence your ROI calculations) are incorrect. You may have software to do this, which is great—but often you’ll just be working with a spreadsheet. That means you would need to manually go through to calculate how many of your leads aren’t real.
For instance, I recently ran a campaign (let’s call it Campaign X) in which 3% of the leads were spam and 8% were fake. Worse, another 36% were personal Gmail, Hotmail, and Yahoo! email addresses, which don’t represent the ideal type of leads for marketing B2B products.
In this scenario, a low IQ marketer wouldn’t even notice (or care, frankly) that a third of their leads are junk. A fixed IQ marketer might remove the 11% (3% and 8%) of bad form fills and recalculate their conversion rate—a step in the right direction, but we can do better.
We need to think like high IQ marketers. We can improve the way we optimize our campaigns by going beyond conversion rates and considering micro metrics.
High IQ Marketing: Using Micro Metrics to Optimize Smarter
Micro metrics are a more nuanced look at what’s happening in the campaign experience. They provide us with alternative ways to measure performance—beyond the top-level conversion rate.
In Campaign X, we can consider the following three values as micro metrics that can be individually optimized:
The percentage of spam email addresses entered by bots.
The percentage of fake email addresses entered by humans.
The percentage of professional or branded email addresses.
In regard to the metric #3, a branded email address is one that includes the company you work for (like [email protected]), as opposed to your personal email address (such as [email protected], my first and long inactive email address). This is important, because having someone’s branded email address means that you get to see which companies are signing up. Plus, when you do your follow-up email marketing, you know you’re contacting someone when they’re thinking about business (rather than sitting on the toilet checking their personal email).
If you wanted to optimize the landing page in Campaign X, you’d go through some of the normal steps of doing research coupled with ideation around possible improvements—but you might not have a strong starting position in terms of focus. By zeroing in on the micro metrics, we know exactly which aspects of behavior we’re trying to influence.
High IQ Marketing: Micro Metrics in Practice
Using micro metrics, I’ll walk through some of the optimization ideas that I implemented in Campaign X (and how they performed in an A/B test).
Optimizing Micro Metric #1: Spam Emails
In this instance, you could add a CAPTCHA or honeypot to try to prevent the spam bots getting through, but I decided to focus on optimizing metrics #2 and #3 as they presented larger opportunities.
Optimizing Micro Metric #2: Fake Emails
The goal of Campaign X was to gain access to a free landing page course, but people were entering fake emails hoping that they would get access regardless. (They did—it redirected them to the course after the form was submitted.) To fix this problem, I added a simple statement beside the email field that stated: “Enter the email address you’d like us to send the course link to.” People felt that they had to add a real email address in order to continue.
Impact: The number of fake emails dropped from 7.9% to 5%—an improvement of 35%.
Optimizing Micro Metric #3: Branded Emails
For this one, I leaned on some experimentation I did a few years ago where I tested changing the label on the email address field. In my research, I found that by rewriting “Email Address” to say “Business Email Address,” the number of branded emails went up by almost 60%. (I guess you get what you ask for.)
Impact: When I leveraged this research and applied it to Campaign X, it helped increase the number of branded emails from 66.4% to 80.8%—an increase of 21.7%.
What Can We Learn from Micro Metrics?
Earlier in my career, I’d look at a page and try to find things I could make “better” (which was largely subjective, even though it was based on 20 years of web experience) and it limited my number of successful A/B tests. By following a micro-metric approach instead, I’ve been able to learn faster and win more because I’m focused on behavior rather than perceived motivation.
If you want to improve your marketing through a better understanding of your true lead gen conversion rates, I’d suggest the following:
Do the manual labor of clicking through every lead you have—then count the percentage that are spam, fake, or personal (rather than branded).
Adjust your conversion rates and conversion counts accordingly.
Compare your new results to what you were previously reporting and communicate the correct numbers to your stakeholders.
Set up some micro metrics based on your observations and try to optimize specifically for them (rather than making the whole page “better”).
The simple but arduous task of manually inspecting your leads can provide a ton of insight that will inspire (or depress) you, depending on what you find.
I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments!
https://unbounce.com/lead-generation/conversion-rate-b2b/
0 notes